when the chaplain and the brothers had left me alone with my husband -- oh , lucas , it is the first time i have written the words 'my husband ' -- left me alone with my wife , i took the book from under her pillow , and wrapped it up in white paper , and tied it with a little bit of pale blue ribbon which was round my neck , and sealed it over the knot with sealing wax , and for my seal i used my wedding ring .