im really starting to struggle now and i hear myself say shees boorifal but i think he still gets it , he pats my arm and says yeah , aint she , much better than yours and he says this without a trace of sarcasm , or superiority ( but im hardly in a position to start worrying about motivations ) wazza probeem '' i manage , and he sighs , well man , its crazy , but shes got it into her head that im a bad man , that i do bad things , and now , man , she says , thats wrong , that i cant do that no more or else shell leave me .