and i see that theres a rope that somehow now seems to exist , that is attached to something in my living room and heads straight out through the broken space into the darkness , the light , the noise , beyond , and im thinking that it looks scary , like an entrance , or an exit , somewhere to nowhere , and do i really want to do this , is this party really worth it , but then i see ruths face , the desire in it , the broken and cracked and ancient beauty and i think yes i can yes of course i do yes i want to go anywhere with this woman and her strange , fluorescent skin , and so i smile and lift myself to my feet , and tenderly , carefully touch elena and she looks up , peeks out from behind her hands and gives me a small , nervous smile , and takes my hand and gradually i lift her up and together , all three of us turn from the safety and comfort of the overturned sofa to walk towards the light .