like a roar , it felt in my ears at least , and this amazing pain that starts in my left hand and rips through me , and i turn my head , i mean im gone , thats it , its all over , and of course , there he is , simon , standing over me with this huge grin , with a pair of pliers in his hand and theres just blood , and then suddenly the straps are gone and i look at my hand and its missing the little finger .