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SPEAKER_01
Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous.
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SPEAKER_01
I m Dax Randall Shepard.
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SPEAKER_01
I m joined by Monica Lilly Padman.
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Armchair Anonymous.
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Armchair Anonymous.
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A word that gives me anxiety every time I try to spell it.
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SPEAKER_01
Every time I try to spell anonymous, I can t find the gear in the transmission.
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SPEAKER_01
I m like, A-N-what?
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I know there s a Y in there.
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SPEAKER_01
How many N s and M s are there?
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SPEAKER_01
It s a roughy for me.
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SPEAKER_02
Okay, maybe a hack is if you think of it as a non, if you shortened it to a non.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay, star of cereal?
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SPEAKER_01
That s ad-non.
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SPEAKER_02
That s ad-non.
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SPEAKER_02
If you do a non for short, then you know a non doesn t have a Y, right?
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SPEAKER_02
So you know that would come after.
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SPEAKER_01
Great.
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SPEAKER_02
So then first you spell a non.
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SPEAKER_01
Yes.
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SPEAKER_01
I love this workshop you re giving me.
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SPEAKER_02
No, that s gonna sound bad.
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SPEAKER_02
A-N-O-N.
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SPEAKER_01
I put some tissue in my nose to try to make Monica laugh and throw her off her game as I always try to do because I m like working with an eight-year-old.
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SPEAKER_02
You are!
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SPEAKER_02
You re a child.
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I m not.
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SPEAKER_01
I wish I had balls to throw at you.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_02
Oh my god.
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SPEAKER_01
Or I should get one of those toy boyoneros with the little suction cups at the end and just launch them at you while we do this.
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Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_02
I m trying to teach.
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SPEAKER_02
This is what you were like as a student.
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SPEAKER_01
Probably.
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SPEAKER_02
Oh wow.
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Sorry.
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He s got a glimpse.
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My poor teachers.
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SPEAKER_02
First you spell Anon.
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SPEAKER_01
Anon.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I can do that.
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SPEAKER_02
Spell it.
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SPEAKER_01
A-N-O-N.
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SPEAKER_02
Perfect.
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SPEAKER_02
Now you know you got that out of the way, now you add the Y. Now I add the Y. Y-M-O-U-S.
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SPEAKER_02
That s right.
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SPEAKER_01
Really?
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Anonymous.
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Yeah.
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And it s like Y like if it s in Spanish, E. Oh, E. Anonymous.
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Anonymous.
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SPEAKER_02
Okay, I did a great job.
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SPEAKER_01
You did.
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SPEAKER_01
We don t need extra.
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SPEAKER_01
We don t need extra stuff.
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SPEAKER_02
Extra stuff.
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SPEAKER_01
What if this prompt was, tell us about a word you have a hard time spelling.
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And we got all four guessing in under like three minutes.
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Oh my God.
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This is meet-cutes.
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Meet-cutes.
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By popular demand, meet-cutes.
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SPEAKER_02
Meet-cute.
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And they were cute.
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They are.
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This is really sweet.
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They warm this Grinch heart of mine.
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Good.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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Three sizes.
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SPEAKER_01
I really liked them.
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1.5.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, wow.
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SPEAKER_01
Batiste, he had already 4X d it, so there was only so far it could go.
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Oh, that s good.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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So now it s all the way.
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It s all the way.
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And you can listen to all these.
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The word penis is used.
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If that s too much for you, then this isn t for you.
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But other than that, this is real safe and sweet.
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It s lovely.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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Please enjoy Meet Cutes.
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SPEAKER_00
Take em slow, my life, I had em both But one thing, you gotta know, I ma keep on shining
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SPEAKER_00
Hi.
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SPEAKER_00
Hi.
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SPEAKER_00
Hi.
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SPEAKER_01
I love how many stuffies you have in your background.
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I see four.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, this is Henry s room.
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SPEAKER_00
Henry is my sister s toy poodle.
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So this is his little enclave under the staircase.
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SPEAKER_01
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
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SPEAKER_01
Those are all the dog stuffies?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Wow, he s so spoiled.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he is.
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SPEAKER_00
I know, you should see his closet.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh.
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SPEAKER_00
He has a closet?
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SPEAKER_00
He has a closet.
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SPEAKER_00
I think the dog s her child.
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SPEAKER_01
So Nazzy, what a fun name.
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How on earth did your parents come up with that?
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SPEAKER_00
It s actually Nazzy.
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SPEAKER_00
It s short for Nazgul.
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SPEAKER_00
It s a Persian name.
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SPEAKER_00
It means cute flower.
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SPEAKER_00
But I think just growing up in LA and just having substitute teachers butcher my name constantly, I was kind of scarred.
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SPEAKER_00
So when I went to college, I started going by Nazzy.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, I like Nazzy.
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SPEAKER_01
It s very cute.
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SPEAKER_00
Well, cute flower.
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SPEAKER_01
Cute, which is the topic today.
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That s right.
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SPEAKER_01
Ding, ding, ding.
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SPEAKER_01
So you have a meet cute story.
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SPEAKER_00
I do.
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So this story takes place in transit because I was traveling when it happened, but I was living in Brooklyn and I was going to my friend s wedding in Michigan.
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SPEAKER_00
I went to college in Michigan.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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And these were my two best friends from college.
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I was really excited to see them get married.
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The wedding was in Frankfort, Michigan.
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So as you know, it s like all the way on the West edge, you have to fly into Grand Rapids and then it s like a two and a half to three hour drive.
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So not
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that easy to get to.
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So I m on my flight from LaGuardia to Grand Rapids and there s this older gentleman sitting next to me and is like 60s.
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This is not the subject of the MuteCute.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, I m already sad.
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SPEAKER_01
I couldn t wait to hear about you and the 60 year old.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, sorry about that.
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SPEAKER_00
We start having normal, plain, small talk.
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SPEAKER_00
He s telling me about how he s from Long Island.
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SPEAKER_00
He s recently divorced.
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He starts talking about his dating life and his sex life.
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Now he s into younger women, and it gets really uncomfortable really quickly, and I m trying to sort of divert the situation and sort of ignore him, and he just keeps trying, and... It wasn t great.
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Come to find out that he is also going to Frankfurt, Michigan, except he s going to a funeral.
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And he s staying at the same hotel that I m staying at.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, no.
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Oh, this is impossible.
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The story gets more impossible.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, great.
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SPEAKER_00
So I m like, cool, I ll just try to avoid this person all weekend.
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It s fine.
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I like hop in my rental car, pick up my friend.
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We drive to the wedding, have an incredible time.
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SPEAKER_00
Sunday morning, I m ruthlessly hungover.
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SPEAKER_00
exiting out of my room and I see a creepy dude standing outside my door, like leaning on the railing.
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SPEAKER_00
I know it was really gross.
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SPEAKER_00
He smells like alcohol.
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He s smoking a cigarette.
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I can t tell if he s like loaded from the morning or the night before.
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SPEAKER_00
But I m just like, how did he know where my room was?
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And so he s just like, oh, Nazi, I just wanted to see how the wedding was.
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You left your suitcase outside your room on Friday night.
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I wanted to knock on your door and let you know, but I thought you might be sleeping.
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And then I m freaked out because I m just like, ew, he s known where I ve slept this whole time.
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Granted, I went to this wedding alone, so I was like sleeping in the room alone.
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So the whole thing just made me even more uncomfortable.
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And so I quickly dodge him.
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SPEAKER_00
I get in my rental car and with my friend go to the airport.
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SPEAKER_00
This becomes important to the story later, but I was in active alcoholism and addiction at the time.
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SPEAKER_00
So I was just drinking a lot before the flight on some other substances.
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And that was the way of coping with the anxiety.
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SPEAKER_01
I like you like 10 times more now.
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SPEAKER_01
I just want you to know now that that details out, I immediately like you 10 times more.
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SPEAKER_01
What pills are we mixing in with the booze?
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SPEAKER_01
I just need to kind of know what your vibe is.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Amphetamines.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay, great.
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SPEAKER_00
And so I get to the gate and I m waiting and then I see the creepy dude is sitting at the bar.
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I m like, crap.
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He s also going to be on my flight back.
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SPEAKER_00
What in the world?
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SPEAKER_00
So I m kind of just tucked away in the corner.
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SPEAKER_00
And then like in my periphery, I see a tall, not 6 4 tall, but tall, regardless gentleman with really pretty green eyes.
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And we re like kind of exchanging glances, but I m on high alert and not really in the mood to flirt right now.
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SPEAKER_01
You have a stalker within view.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, the wall is up and then I look him up and down and I look at his shoes and I just don t like his shoes.
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He has these orange running shoes and he s wearing them with jeans and I was 25.
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That s how you immediately judge a guy, you look at their shoes.
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Although Orange is fun and playful and bold.
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Now it would be cool and in.
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SPEAKER_00
He was ahead of his time.
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He was ahead of his time, exactly.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, how long ago was this?
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SPEAKER_00
This was in 2017.
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I m boarding the flight.
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I get to my row, which is row 17, and somebody s sitting in my seat, which was 17A, so I very kindly tell them, like, hey, I m sorry, I think you re in my seat.
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show them my ticket they re like oh sorry you know they walk out and then i didn t realize it but pretty eyes ugly shoes is behind me he helped me with my suitcase and he s like oh had i known you were sitting in 17a i wouldn t have changed seats to sit next to my buddies i was supposed to be in 17b have a great flight
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SPEAKER_00
But now I m like intrigued.
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SPEAKER_00
I m forgetting about the ugly shoes.
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SPEAKER_00
How s his face?
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It s really nice.
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It s tan.
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It s like a little bit angular.
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He s got some salt and peppery finishes in his hair.
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SPEAKER_00
They re like older, but not like 60s older.
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SPEAKER_00
More like late mid 30s older.
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SPEAKER_00
Ooh, nice.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
Monty s sweet spot.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, exactly.
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SPEAKER_00
So then I m on this flight and we have a layover in Detroit.
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SPEAKER_00
Everybody going to back to New York has a layover in Detroit.
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SPEAKER_00
So I m just in a daze thinking manically, okay, like, what do I do?
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Where do I go?
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SPEAKER_00
Do I say something?
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SPEAKER_00
He s sitting kitty corner for me at this point and is still trying to talk to me.
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SPEAKER_00
The creepy dude, not the cute guy, the creepy dude.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, the creepy guy is within earshot as well.
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SPEAKER_00
Yes.
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SPEAKER_01
It s a love triangle now.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
I hope it s his dad.
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SPEAKER_00
No, it s not his dad.
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SPEAKER_00
That would be weird now because I m still dating this guy.
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SPEAKER_00
I m just like, okay, let me just go to the most crowded place I can think of.
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SPEAKER_00
Obviously it s the airport bar.
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SPEAKER_00
So I go there, I slam three IPAs in like 40 minutes.
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SPEAKER_00
So at this point I have a lot of booze in my system.
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SPEAKER_00
It s like a combination of liquid courage and like also being overly dramatic.
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SPEAKER_00
So then I start boarding the flight that s going back to New York and I see that the creepy dude is like a couple people in front of me and I m just like I don t want to encounter this again.
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I also see pretty eyes ugly shoes there s a few people behind me and then I m thinking to myself like do I
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Don t ask him if he wants to sit next to me, since he was supposed to be sitting next to me on the previous flight.
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Is that weird?
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Am I going to look too damsel-y and distress-y if I do that?
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I m a pretty risk-averse person and pretty reserved, so I decided, like, no, no, that s crazy.
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You re not going to do that.
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Also, like, you have a ton of booze in your system.
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You don t know what the fuck you re going to say.
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say.
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So I decide not to.
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And then I swear, I don t know, it was just like a higher power moment or my subconscious guiding me in a different direction.
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But like my brain just went offline for my feet.
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And I found myself just like marching back towards pretty eyes, ugly shoes.
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And he s really confused because he s like, who walks the opposite direction out of the airport tunnel?
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Like nobody does that unless it s an emergency.
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So I stop in front of him and I m like, hey, can I ask you a really aggressive question?
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And he s like, sure.
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And I m like, there s this guy that I m trying to avoid.
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It s a little bit of a stalker situation.
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SPEAKER_01
Can you sit next to me so he s nowhere near me or just so I feel more protected?
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SPEAKER_01
I don t exactly remember how I phrased it.
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And then he like kind of giggles and he s like, yeah, sure.
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What s your name?
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SPEAKER_01
We exchange names.
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I am Nazi.
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Hi, I m Jonathan.
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And he s like, oh, what were you doing in Grand Rapids?
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Because he had seen me at the gate.
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And I was like, oh, I was at a wedding in Frankfurt.
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What were you doing in Grand Rapids?
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And he was just like, huh, I was also at a wedding in Frankfurt.
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SPEAKER_00
No.
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SPEAKER_01
And then I was like, what?
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, my friend Sarah and Andrew were getting married.
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SPEAKER_01
And then his face just goes like blank.
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And he s so confused.
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And he looks like he s getting punked.
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And he s like, my friend Sarah and Andrew got married in Frankfurt this weekend.
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Oh my lord.
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We re both at really small weddings, like don t remember seeing each other.
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We quickly find out they were just different weddings in the same small town in Michigan on the same weekend.
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With the same names.
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SPEAKER_00
With the same names.
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SPEAKER_00
What?
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SPEAKER_00
No.
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SPEAKER_00
That s a big glitch.
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SPEAKER_00
That s a very big glitch, yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Wow.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, we got to report this to the systems errors people.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
You know what it is, Nazi?
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SPEAKER_00
It s lazy.
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SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, he s busy.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I guess.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, I have to thank him because it did lead me to the person I m still with.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Cause now you guys have a mystery in your laps.
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SPEAKER_00
You re like, wait, we were at the same wedding, but we didn t see each other.
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SPEAKER_00
And it was small.
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SPEAKER_00
How s this possible?
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, it must take you a long time to realize it s two different people with the exact same name.
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SPEAKER_01
It didn t take that long.
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SPEAKER_01
It took a few minutes, but then it got even weirder because we were both from New York, but like, not only were we both from New York, we lived in the same neighborhood.
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SPEAKER_01
We went to the same gym.
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His apartment was a few blocks from my office.
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SPEAKER_01
So like,
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There s so many other ways we could have ran into each other other than an airport in Grand Rapids.
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SPEAKER_01
So we exchange information.
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SPEAKER_01
I find out that his friend lives on my block.
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SPEAKER_01
So I decide to share an Uber with them.
1
SPEAKER_01
So then we get out and we are waiting for his friends to come out of the plane and then they deplane and then they see us and they re so confused.
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SPEAKER_01
They re like, I don t understand.
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SPEAKER_01
Our buddy is now standing with his airport crush.
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SPEAKER_01
How did this happen?
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SPEAKER_00
Are you dating this woman?
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SPEAKER_01
So it started like that and we slowly started dating and sparks were flying and we ve been together ever since.
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SPEAKER_01
That was six and a half years ago.
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SPEAKER_01
And he s amazing.
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SPEAKER_01
We ve been through so much together.
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SPEAKER_01
I got sober while I was with him and our relationship only continued to flourish.
1
SPEAKER_00
How long ago was that?
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SPEAKER_01
I got sober in 2019 of July.
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SPEAKER_01
So it s been like four and a half years.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
So within your first year of sobriety, you were doing COVID and quarantine.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it was not good.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
That s hard.
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SPEAKER_00
That s the tricky.
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SPEAKER_01
It was really hard.
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SPEAKER_00
Well, congrats.
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SPEAKER_00
That s incredible.
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SPEAKER_01
Thank you.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
And I wanted to thank you guys so much.
1
SPEAKER_01
I know a lot of people have like a really deep connection to this podcast and I obviously do for that reason.
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SPEAKER_01
And also in sobriety, I discovered a lot about.
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SPEAKER_01
my mental health that I didn t know before.
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SPEAKER_01
Like I have pretty prominent obsessive compulsive disorder, which I didn t realize.
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SPEAKER_01
And your podcast is the things that I listen to when I m having an episode and I need to feel like grounded in reality again.
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SPEAKER_01
I just hear your voices and hear you guys talk to whatever expert that you re talking to and immediately feel like, okay, I know where my place is in this world.
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SPEAKER_01
I don t need to get lost in my own mind.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, it s so flattering.
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SPEAKER_00
It s crazy.
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SPEAKER_00
I m so happy for you.
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SPEAKER_00
What shoes is he wearing now?
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SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Because obviously they ll be super cool in three years and maybe I can be ahead.
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SPEAKER_01
Right now he s wearing high top bluish gray Vans.
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SPEAKER_01
That sounds cute.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re cute.
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SPEAKER_00
I m not very far off from that.
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SPEAKER_00
I have now been really going back to my leather Converse.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
Right?
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SPEAKER_00
With my Beckham style.
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SPEAKER_00
So that s the similar silhouette.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I m in my workout shoes right now.
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SPEAKER_00
Don t judge me now.
1
SPEAKER_00
Please don t judge me.
1
SPEAKER_03
He was probably in his workout shoes too that day.
1
SPEAKER_00
At the airport.
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SPEAKER_03
But in jeans.
1
SPEAKER_03
He forgot or maybe, you know, often this happens where you have to wear the wrong shoe on the plane because it s the bulkiest shoe.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, right.
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SPEAKER_00
It won t fit in your bag.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yep.
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SPEAKER_00
That s true.
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SPEAKER_00
I ve done that.
1
SPEAKER_03
Oh yeah, that makes sense.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe that s what it was.
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SPEAKER_00
Tiny silhouette, like a slip on that went into the bag.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
That would have been cuter with the jeans, but he had to make a sacrifice.
1
SPEAKER_00
I like this meet cute.
1
SPEAKER_00
I was against it, but now I really like it.
1
SPEAKER_03
Oh, you were against it because you wanted to be the stalker, right?
1
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
1
SPEAKER_00
Just remember the heading itself, meet cute.
1
SPEAKER_00
I was apprehensive about it.
1
SPEAKER_00
And now I m admitting that I really like it.
1
SPEAKER_03
Okay, great.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s super nice meeting you and I m really delighted to hear the story and I m so, so happy for you that you found sobriety.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, thank you so much.
1
SPEAKER_00
All right.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, great meeting you and congrats to that dog with that incredible environment.
1
SPEAKER_00
Henry.
1
SPEAKER_00
Henry.
1
SPEAKER_00
Good job.
1
SPEAKER_03
He s an arm cherry too.
1
SPEAKER_03
Then he deserves all of those stuffies.
1
SPEAKER_00
He does.
1
SPEAKER_00
He does.
1
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
1
SPEAKER_00
All right.
1
SPEAKER_03
Bye.
1
SPEAKER_00
Take care.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe I ll have a meet-cute during this.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god.
1
SPEAKER_00
Here comes Kate.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s how you know right away it s Kate.
1
SPEAKER_00
K-A-Y-T-E.
1
SPEAKER_00
Or Katie.
1
SPEAKER_00
Could be Katie.
1
SPEAKER_00
K-A-T-E?
1
SPEAKER_00
K-A-T-E?
1
SPEAKER_00
I m just gonna put a little spin on things.
1
SPEAKER_00
We prize individuality in this country.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hi, is it Kate?
1
SPEAKER_02
I introduced myself Katie, but a lot of people call me Kate and I m totally fine with that too.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, I wanted to call you Katie, but never seen it spelled this way.
1
SPEAKER_00
Such an exciting spelling.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, thank you.
1
SPEAKER_02
My dad made it up.
1
SPEAKER_00
He did.
1
SPEAKER_00
Dads like to do this kind of shit, right?
1
SPEAKER_02
They do, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Where are you at?
1
SPEAKER_00
Are you in a pink tent?
1
SPEAKER_02
I am in my daughter s pink tent.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, fun.
1
SPEAKER_00
And where are you at in the country?
1
SPEAKER_02
I am in the southwest suburbs of Chicago.
1
SPEAKER_00
Right.
1
SPEAKER_03
How old are you?
1
SPEAKER_03
If you don t mind me asking.
1
SPEAKER_03
No, I don t mind you asking.
1
SPEAKER_03
I m 31.
1
SPEAKER_00
Were you afraid she was a minor?
1
SPEAKER_03
You look so young.
1
SPEAKER_03
Oh, I do?
1
SPEAKER_03
Yes, congratulations.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, to have a daughter with a 10?
1
SPEAKER_03
Exactly, that was trying to piece together.
1
SPEAKER_03
I was like, how?
1
SPEAKER_03
Because you look 18.
1
SPEAKER_03
She s only three.
1
SPEAKER_03
Still, still.
1
SPEAKER_00
But if you were 18, that would mean you had her at 15, which would be an early start.
1
SPEAKER_00
You could likely have great grandchildren by 50 on that trajectory.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you have a meet cute story and we re dying to hear it.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, great.
1
SPEAKER_02
So Monica, we re relatively similar in age, so I hope you know of this game or maybe even played it and then I ll be a little bit less embarrassed.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
Do you guys remember or have you ever heard of the penis game?
1
SPEAKER_01
I remember the penis game.
1
SPEAKER_02
In the early 2000s, 2010s, when you would just yell.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, yes.
1
SPEAKER_02
Penis at increasing volumes in a public space to see who would respond.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m so sad I never was somewhere when someone was playing it.
1
SPEAKER_02
This was a common game.
1
SPEAKER_00
I would love this.
1
SPEAKER_02
It also happened in school.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yes, yes, definitely, which is where mine takes place.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was in college up in Wisconsin, and my girlfriends and I thought on a Saturday night that it would be hilarious to play this game out of one of their apartment windows.
1
SPEAKER_02
And we would just take turns yelling penis, going up to the window yelling it.
1
SPEAKER_02
And as you can imagine, most people were walking by just like ignoring us or being like, haha, you know, because we re very immature.
1
SPEAKER_00
Or getting aroused, aren t the boys getting aroused?
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t think so.
1
SPEAKER_00
No?
1
SPEAKER_03
It s not sexy so much.
1
SPEAKER_00
For me, if I m walking down the street, God, that organic chemistry exam s coming up.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t want a penis.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I look over and there s a cute girl going, penis.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m like, oh my God, does she want some penis?
1
SPEAKER_00
Fuck that organic chemistry test.
1
SPEAKER_03
Okay, I can see how it would be sexy.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s just one scenario that could have played out.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, makes sense.
1
SPEAKER_03
Well, you re not too far off.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
1
SPEAKER_03
I ll cut all of that.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
So it was my turn and I walk over the window.
1
SPEAKER_02
Mind you, we re like two or three stories up.
1
SPEAKER_02
You can just see kind of shadows walking by, but all of a sudden I just see this big group of what looked like a bunch of college bros walking by.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I just yell penis at the top of my lungs.
1
SPEAKER_02
Penis!
1
SPEAKER_02
And without skipping a beat, one of them stops in his tracks, looks up at me and goes, vagina, what s up?
1
SPEAKER_02
And so then I just start laughing.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was like totally caught off guard that someone actually thought it was funny.
1
SPEAKER_02
He s then yelling up to us like, come to this campus bar.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was 19 at the time, didn t have a fake ID.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
1
SPEAKER_02
I know, I m just like giggling to myself.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I like this girl.
1
SPEAKER_00
She s yelling penis out the window and she doesn t have a beard.
1
SPEAKER_00
She s probably drinking a little bit.
1
SPEAKER_00
You have a little beard?
1
SPEAKER_02
Probably no, if I m being honest.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s what I m here to do.
1
SPEAKER_00
Color commentary.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was definitely what you would consider.
2
SPEAKER_03
consider a good girl.
2
SPEAKER_03
So my girlfriend then starts shouting my phone number out to him.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
She s going to wingman you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Good for her.
2
SPEAKER_03
I get a couple of text messages that night and they re like, we re at this bar, come out.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I didn t want to be like, I m not 21.
2
SPEAKER_03
So I m just playing it off like, yeah, maybe another time, you know?
2
SPEAKER_03
So then I saved the number in my phone as Vagina and then kind of forgot about it.
2
SPEAKER_03
You know, we just moved on with our lives.
2
SPEAKER_03
Months go by and I get a text message from Vagina.
2
SPEAKER_03
And it was like, hey, we re going to these bars tonight.
2
SPEAKER_03
Come out.
2
SPEAKER_03
I was still not 21, not in presence of a fake ID.
2
SPEAKER_03
We didn t obviously meet up, but then I just was like, OK, well, we can just text.
2
SPEAKER_00
Now, really quick, were you afraid to say, I can t go to the bar, I m 19?
2
SPEAKER_00
Were you trying to keep your age a secret?
2
SPEAKER_03
Or you felt it was embarrassing?
2
SPEAKER_03
I was just kind of a little embarrassed.
2
SPEAKER_03
Like most people I feel like had a fake ID.
2
SPEAKER_00
Had their shit together for college.
2
SPEAKER_03
And so I just thought, well, if I tell them this, then what if they think I m lame?
2
SPEAKER_03
But then as we started texting, then I told him, stop asking me to go to the bars, I can t go to the bars.
2
SPEAKER_03
A few days go by and we were kind of texting on and off and he was super nice.
2
SPEAKER_03
And so I was like, huh, I wonder.
2
SPEAKER_03
Then I m talking to my girlfriend, Emily.
2
SPEAKER_03
I m like, I really don t know much about him.
2
SPEAKER_03
All I know is his name is Tom and he s studying biology.
2
SPEAKER_03
I don t know if I am comfortable meeting up with him because I don t know him or anything about him other than that really.
2
SPEAKER_03
And her coworker and friend who was sitting right next to her, Tim, goes, wait, his name s Tom and he s studying biology.
2
SPEAKER_03
Can I see his number?
2
SPEAKER_03
So I hand him my phone, and he goes, Katie, this is my really good friend and roommate next year.
2
SPEAKER_03
He s a good guy.
2
SPEAKER_03
You can go out with him.
2
SPEAKER_02
Whoa.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I was like, oh, OK.
2
SPEAKER_03
Well, that makes me feel more comfortable.
2
SPEAKER_03
Then we set up a date, and we ve been together ever since.
2
SPEAKER_03
And you have a little three-year-old baby together?
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_03
So we ve been together for 11 years, married for six.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, my gosh.
2
SPEAKER_00
Was Tom your first boyfriend?
2
SPEAKER_03
Kind of.
2
SPEAKER_03
Like, serious?
2
SPEAKER_03
The only one I count, really.
2
SPEAKER_00
Uh-huh.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, this is terribly sweet.
2
SPEAKER_00
It started so dirty, but it ended up being so sweet.
2
SPEAKER_03
Very sweet.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, you guys were screaming genitalia at each other, and then it turned out to be so G. We re both pretty conservative, so it s pretty startling, I think, for some people to hear that came out of both of us.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Did he have a fake ID, or was he two years older than you?
2
SPEAKER_03
He was two years older.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
Or is two years older.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, stud.
2
SPEAKER_02
Wow, you just start by shouting out.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s what we call putting yourself out there.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
You just put yourself out there.
2
SPEAKER_03
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, so Monica, if these last few dates haven t worked out, just another suggestion.
2
SPEAKER_00
Open your window, invite Callie over so she can scream your phone number.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I need some lean people.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Katie, that s a very sweet story.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m very happy you guys have this little baby.
2
SPEAKER_02
This is lovely.
2
SPEAKER_02
These are the stories that make you feel encouraged.
2
SPEAKER_00
They re antidotes to couples therapy.
2
SPEAKER_02
And antidotes to piercing and tattoos.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, that s true.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is cleansing.
2
SPEAKER_02
And we do have another baby on the way too.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh, congratulations.
2
SPEAKER_03
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_03
Is it OK if I give one quick shout out to my girlfriend, Tara?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, please.
2
SPEAKER_03
We ve both been listening since day one and text very regularly about episodes.
2
SPEAKER_03
So just wanted to tell her I love her and it s so fun to listen with her.
2
SPEAKER_03
She also went to school with us, too.
2
SPEAKER_03
She saw the evolution of Tom.
2
SPEAKER_03
That s right.
2
SPEAKER_03
That s so fun.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, shout out to her.
2
SPEAKER_03
And can I just say one more thing, Monica, when you were talking recently about your grandpa and synced.
2
SPEAKER_03
So my grandfather had Alzheimer s.
2
SPEAKER_03
He was diagnosed at 64.
2
SPEAKER_03
And so he lived, unfortunately, for a very long time with it.
2
SPEAKER_03
And it s so hard.
2
SPEAKER_03
And so I just wanted to say I m feeling for you and I know how difficult it is.
2
SPEAKER_03
And one thing that came to mind when you were talking about how hard it is for you to, like, spend time with him and see him when he
2
SPEAKER_03
doesn t remember you.
2
SPEAKER_03
I totally relate.
2
SPEAKER_03
It s very challenging.
2
SPEAKER_03
My grandma, who cared for my grandpa for as long as she possibly could, and then it wasn t safe anymore and he had to move into a community, but she would still visit him every day.
2
SPEAKER_03
And people would say to her all the time, why do you go see him?
2
SPEAKER_03
He doesn t remember you.
2
SPEAKER_03
And she said the most simple response, and I just loved it and it stuck with me forever, is she would say, well, he doesn t remember me, but I still remember him.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that s a really special thing to remember Katie Thomas so lucky It s actually a fake name because we re so conservative we didn t even want people to know our penis Oh my god, you guys are so that s fine.
2
SPEAKER_00
Tom aka fucking whatever vagina vagina is so lucky
2
SPEAKER_02
Yes, lovely.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you for that.
2
SPEAKER_02
That was really sweet and needed.
2
SPEAKER_02
You re welcome.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thinking of you guys.
2
SPEAKER_03
Well, thank you so much for all you do.
2
SPEAKER_03
The show has got me through a lot of tough times.
2
SPEAKER_03
I m a stay at home mom now, which wasn t planned, but just life happened during COVID and I get kind of bored.
2
SPEAKER_03
We are going to keep you busy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
You do.
2
SPEAKER_00
We just keep turning up the heat.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, Katie, it s so nice to meet you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thanks for telling us that lovely story.
2
SPEAKER_00
Take care.
2
SPEAKER_00
Bye.
2
SPEAKER_00
Bye.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
2
SPEAKER_00
Now you never wave, and I always wave.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s really crazy.
2
SPEAKER_02
I almost said I love you.
2
SPEAKER_02
You know when you say, bro, I love you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I almost said it too.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
She was so sweet.
2
SPEAKER_02
I know.
2
SPEAKER_02
So many people are in relationships.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s pretty common.
2
SPEAKER_00
About half the people, probably.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s really interesting to think about that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is it?
2
SPEAKER_02
It s nice.
2
SPEAKER_02
People find their people.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s lovely.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they team up.
2
SPEAKER_02
People team up.
2
SPEAKER_00
People team up.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s crazy.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s like minimally what we can do.
2
SPEAKER_00
We re supposed to be with 30 people that we trust.
2
SPEAKER_00
I am.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s extended family.
2
SPEAKER_00
But I mean, I just mean like normally you would live with multiple generations of your family.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was thinking, were we just talking about that?
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah, we were.
2
SPEAKER_00
We were talking about you yesterday in the fact check.
2
SPEAKER_00
The Padmans.
2
SPEAKER_00
Your fear of them gone.
2
SPEAKER_00
The chocolate chip.
2
SPEAKER_00
How tiny your trusted group was.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let s talk to Phillip.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, chocolate chip.
2
SPEAKER_02
Penis!
2
SPEAKER_02
That was a fun game.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, Phillip s being assisted.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s my assistant.
2
SPEAKER_01
She doubles as my daughter.
2
SPEAKER_00
I can t wait till mine s old enough to be my assistant.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s really cool.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then when they re old enough, they definitely make sure you re politically correct.
2
SPEAKER_01
I have to say, I really appreciate it.
2
SPEAKER_01
How else would you learn?
2
SPEAKER_01
I encourage them to get me hip.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right, right.
2
SPEAKER_01
Are you a musician, Philip?
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes, I m a composer.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I m Emmy nominated.
2
SPEAKER_01
But as my son likes to say, I m an Emmy loser.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s nice of him.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s another service they can provide.
2
SPEAKER_02
Congratulations.
2
SPEAKER_02
Emmy nominated.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thanks.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s nice of you.
2
SPEAKER_00
You both look beautiful.
2
SPEAKER_00
Right back at you.
2
SPEAKER_00
You re very handsome.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
You have a meet cute story.
2
SPEAKER_01
I do.
2
SPEAKER_01
So as you ve noticed, I m a composer and I went to Berkeley college of music in Boston.
2
SPEAKER_01
Everybody gets that mixed up.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Explain that.
2
SPEAKER_01
Why did they name it Berkeley?
2
SPEAKER_01
The guy s name was Lee Burke.
2
SPEAKER_01
So it s spelled B E R K L E E. Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
So basically it s the person s name, but as if they were on a roll call.
2
SPEAKER_01
It actually causes more confusion than anything else because everybody thinks it s Berkeley, Northern California.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right.
2
SPEAKER_00
By the way, if you re going to get confused for a school, not a bad one.
2
SPEAKER_00
No.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like if you went to Stanford vocational school for diesel mechanics,
2
SPEAKER_01
If it does me any good, I ll just let them think it s Northern California.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I went there for four years, got a degree in music composition.
2
SPEAKER_01
What year was this?
2
SPEAKER_01
Let s just say it was a while ago.
2
SPEAKER_01
I never thought this was kind of an ageist business, but you re feeling that.
2
SPEAKER_01
a little bit, it can be, because I also produce singer-songwriters, and until they hear that I can lay down a groove, they look at me with suspicion, like, how hip can this guy be?
2
SPEAKER_01
I understand.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s a heat-seeking business we re all in.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s a good way to put it.
2
SPEAKER_00
We all want the next hottest, best thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I went there and then stayed another three years just touring in bands, saving money.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m from Ohio.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I leave Boston.
2
SPEAKER_01
I saw a car in a cornfield in Ohio.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know, that s how they sell cars in the Midwest.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
I ve bought several from fields.
2
SPEAKER_01
It was a Mustang hatchback, 1974.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, wow.
2
$2,500.
2
SPEAKER_01
Beautiful.
2
SPEAKER_01
I just put everything in that, moved to L.A.
2
SPEAKER_01
Fortunately,
2
SPEAKER_01
the neighbor next to me where we shared a wall, which that ll be another episode, we can share some of those stories.
2
SPEAKER_01
But she worked for a music publishing company.
2
SPEAKER_01
The way music publishing companies work is they ll have staff writers that write songs and they ll pitch those songs to recording artists that are selling millions of records, and then they ll make money.
2
SPEAKER_01
They own half of the then recording.
2
SPEAKER_01
You got it.
2
SPEAKER_01
I got this gig, my neighbor found out I could listen to music and write it out.
2
SPEAKER_01
I could transcribe it.
2
SPEAKER_01
Remember cassette tapes?
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
She would bring these cassette tapes home.
2
SPEAKER_01
I would transcribe a song, stay up all night, handed the music in for her to take to work in the morning, and they liked the quick turnaround.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I paid my rent for years that way.
2
SPEAKER_01
Nice.
3
SPEAKER_01
neat side hustle.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was great.
3
SPEAKER_01
So when you re transcribing something, you re kind of weeding it back and forth.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wait, is that a B flat?
3
SPEAKER_01
No, that s a B natural.
3
SPEAKER_01
So by the time you ve transcribed something, you re so inside of it, you almost feel like you ve written it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Of course.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that makes sense.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would listen to these singers writing the melody down, and there was one singer in particular that was just like, wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was MCA Publishing.
3
SPEAKER_01
They had several studio singers, but every time this singer would sing something, I would forget that I have to transcribe this and just start listening to it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Then I say, wow, it s three in the morning, man, I have to get this done.
3
SPEAKER_01
You were mesmerized by this singer.
3
SPEAKER_01
Completely mesmerized.
3
SPEAKER_00
I started feeling like she was singing to me.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sure, sure, sure.
3
SPEAKER_00
And have you created a mental picture of what she looks like at this point?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, this is before Facebook or social media, anything like that.
3
SPEAKER_01
Now here s the part I guess I m not that proud of, but you re both so open.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you can say anything.
3
SPEAKER_01
I know.
3
SPEAKER_01
I feel safe.
3
SPEAKER_00
Good.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was living with a girlfriend.
3
SPEAKER_01
Different woman, yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sure, sure, sure.
3
SPEAKER_01
This happens.
3
SPEAKER_01
Love isn t always tidy.
3
SPEAKER_00
No.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
3
SPEAKER_01
Rarely tidy, no.
3
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t work out that way.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s a messy business.
3
SPEAKER_01
And by the way, we re still friends.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I ll just use everybody s name.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I would say to Mary, God, I love this singer.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
And she would say, yes, me too.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, wow, okay, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
That went on for quite a while, like over a year.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
But it started becoming like, it didn t matter to me if she had an eye in the center of her forehead.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m not kidding.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
I didn t care.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was just like, I want to have little baby cyclopses.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sure, sure.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would say, yeah, I love her.
3
SPEAKER_01
And Mary would say, yes, me too.
3
SPEAKER_01
But in my mind, I m thinking, I think it s starting to take on a little different meaning.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is kind of like the movie Her.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Where he s falling in love with the AI voice.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s a good point.
3
SPEAKER_00
And he s falling deeply in love.
3
SPEAKER_00
My daughter told me not to use the word stalker, but I was like, well, let s back up again.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re not going to give the year of your graduation, but you bought a 74 Mustang.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re using tapes.
3
SPEAKER_00
We know the era.
3
SPEAKER_00
And look, I m not that far off of that.
3
SPEAKER_00
And things were fucking different because you couldn t reach out to somebody with a text.
3
SPEAKER_00
You could get their number and send them a flirty text.
3
SPEAKER_00
You had to arrive somewhere and take your shot.
3
SPEAKER_00
Or DM, none of that.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
3
SPEAKER_00
You had to show up in person.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s inherently with stalkery because you had to show up uninvited to make the introduction.
3
SPEAKER_00
There was no soft way to do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Correct.
3
SPEAKER_01
And my neighbor, Debbie, she kind of knew, because I was constantly asking questions about this singer whose name is Karen Blake, and tell me about her.
3
SPEAKER_01
Debbie kind of knew, like, okay, I can feel you ve got a little crush happening here.
3
SPEAKER_01
And so I knew that Debbie was inviting Karen over one Saturday.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, boy.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I just kind of left my door open.
3
SPEAKER_01
to my apartment, Debbie has her door open and I hear these footsteps coming up the stairs.
3
SPEAKER_01
And so I could hear Debbie greeting Karen.
3
SPEAKER_01
So what I did was I took the last thing I had transcribed of Karen s and I put it on my stereo and like cranked it to 11 and just blasted it for like 10 full seconds.
3
SPEAKER_01
and turned it off, and I could kind of hear them laughing.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I went over there, and she was and still is incredibly beautiful.
3
SPEAKER_00
Exceeded your mental picture you had created?
3
SPEAKER_00
Beyond.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, well, he had a cyclops.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, that s true.
3
SPEAKER_00
The expectations were low.
3
SPEAKER_00
Totally hot.
3
SPEAKER_01
I just thought, I just had to be myself.
3
SPEAKER_01
And now I have to kind of tell it slightly from my wife s perspective.
3
SPEAKER_01
And she said, from Karen s perspective, and she said, it was love at first sight.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
Had she been briefed on you at all?
3
SPEAKER_00
I think she knew that this guy had a little crush on her.
3
SPEAKER_01
But guess what?
3
SPEAKER_01
She had a boyfriend too.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, this is so off and how it is.
3
SPEAKER_01
She said it was love at first sight for her.
3
SPEAKER_01
For me, it was, I don t know what you d call it, love at first listen.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, sure.
3
SPEAKER_01
Then MCA, they hired me to kind of produce some showcases and produce some things for her.
3
SPEAKER_01
And you know, a lot of time together.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes, you can figure out how old I am because we ve been married 40 years.
3
SPEAKER_01
We have two great adult kids.
3
SPEAKER_01
They inherited their mom s singing ability.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s the hope over here as well.
3
SPEAKER_01
My son is such a prolific songwriter.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like, you motherfucker.
3
SPEAKER_01
I had to work so hard.
3
SPEAKER_01
He just has it so quickly.
3
SPEAKER_01
We do have fun when we make music together.
3
SPEAKER_01
And we do this little thing where we all jam in our cozy little kitchen and we ll just put up an iPhone.
3
SPEAKER_01
We post them.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I know it s not that big of a deal nowadays, but one of them got 1.5 million views.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s enormous for civilians.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Right, exactly.
3
SPEAKER_01
I so feel like I married up and I m really lucky.
3
SPEAKER_01
I can feel it, Phyllis.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s really lovely.
3
SPEAKER_01
I can feel your love too, Dax, for your wife.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s very similar, like we re so lucky, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, when you admire someone, it s really helpful.
3
SPEAKER_01
I swear, and she does sing for me a lot.
3
SPEAKER_01
Do you cry?
3
SPEAKER_01
I cry.
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, I get misty eyes sometimes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, same, yeah, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s just like, I can t believe I get to go to bed with you tonight.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
How lucky am I, man?
3
SPEAKER_00
I think everyone won.
3
SPEAKER_01
The kids won, Karen won, Phillip won.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and by the way, our two other significant others, they re completely happy in their lives.
3
SPEAKER_00
I wish they would ve got together and then they re our next call.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like Shania Twain.
3
SPEAKER_00
She got together with the husband of the woman her husband cheated with.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right.
3
SPEAKER_00
Very interesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
Swapped.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s very civil.
3
SPEAKER_00
It is, it s clean.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let s just do-si-do and keep it moving.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, Phillip, it s really nice meeting you.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s such a sweet story.
3
SPEAKER_01
Lovely.
3
SPEAKER_01
You guys are beautiful, and your stock value in our house is really high.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, this is good.
3
SPEAKER_00
Your house seems like a really good safe port in a storm.
3
SPEAKER_01
I agree.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s safe here.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it looks like it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, here comes your- Oh, there she is.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, the woman of the hour.
3
SPEAKER_00
Hi.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, your daughter is technologically advanced, because she s got two sets of headphones working off of this.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m not a complete idiot.
3
SPEAKER_01
I did that.
3
SPEAKER_01
Get in here.
3
SPEAKER_01
Come around.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh.
3
SPEAKER_00
What a beautiful family.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_00
Handsome.
3
SPEAKER_01
Your son is gorgeous.
3
SPEAKER_01
Children.
3
SPEAKER_00
We thought it might be a meet cute Monica.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let s snatch up this young lad right here.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s available.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_00
She ll send over a demo.
3
SPEAKER_00
Monica, are you a vocalist too?
3
SPEAKER_00
No, God, no.
3
SPEAKER_00
But she is a good singer, she just doesn t do it, like he s out.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is good.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s aloof.
3
SPEAKER_01
I like when they leave, it makes me want more.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sorry, they left.
3
SPEAKER_00
He left because he didn t know we were talking about you dating him.
3
SPEAKER_00
He didn t have headphones on.
3
SPEAKER_01
How old is he?
3
SPEAKER_01
He s 24.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s a little bit rough.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s unfortunate for me.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s a pretty big age gap.
3
SPEAKER_00
Somebody will be very happy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, someone s gonna be lucky as hell.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it won t be this old, Gail.
3
SPEAKER_01
He s 6 7 .
3
SPEAKER_00
He s gorgeous.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, this is painful.
3
SPEAKER_01
This hurts.
3
SPEAKER_00
Look, you can have a fling, a Christmas fling.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, he doesn t deserve that.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, he does.
3
SPEAKER_00
This old lady.
3
SPEAKER_00
He likes flings.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, no, he s open to it.
3
SPEAKER_00
All right.
3
SPEAKER_00
Get back here.
3
SPEAKER_00
Get back in here.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s such a dad.
3
SPEAKER_00
Invite his son and be like, no, he s down for this.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow, you re so handsome.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, 6 7 .
3
SPEAKER_00
God.
3
SPEAKER_00
Mom, give him the headphones for one second so he knows what we re saying.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh man, I feel- Six, seven.
3
SPEAKER_01
Six, seven.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, and you sing?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I was gonna sing for her.
3
SPEAKER_00
I pretend to.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, no.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would love to share something with you, it s really, and that s the thing, he s just sitting on a mountain of stuff.
3
SPEAKER_01
He s kind of figuring out what he wants to do, and he s not releasing it.
3
SPEAKER_00
If I were him, I would look in a fucking mirror for the rest of my life.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, he s humble too?
3
SPEAKER_00
I know, but I would just stare at myself in the mirror if I looked like this guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow, wow, wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
Great hair too.
3
SPEAKER_00
What do you think Monica?
3
SPEAKER_00
Come on.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let s go for an evening.
3
SPEAKER_00
Maybe there s a number exchange.
3
SPEAKER_00
Number two.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let s do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
All right.
3
SPEAKER_00
We ll email everyone.
3
SPEAKER_00
This has been so fun.
3
SPEAKER_00
You guys.
3
SPEAKER_01
This is so fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
Really, really great sharing with you guys.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right back at you.
3
SPEAKER_00
Great meeting everybody.
3
SPEAKER_00
Bye.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god, he s gorgeous.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s so gorgeous.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s crazy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Six, seven.
3
SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, your pants exploded.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they re unbuttoned.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow, that s okay for just a nice fun weekend.
3
SPEAKER_00
24 is really a lot younger than me.
3
SPEAKER_00
At 6 7 , that s like 30.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, is that how it works?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you do add two years for every inch over 6 4 .
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
From a lot of that, if we hadn t seen the daughter, I would have bet money that he
4
SPEAKER_01
He was Billie Eilish s dad.
4
SPEAKER_03
That would have made sense.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because Phineas and Billie.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
I was like, I think this is where this is going.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh my God, that would have been wild if they walked up.
4
SPEAKER_01
They live here.
4
SPEAKER_01
They live in LA.
4
SPEAKER_03
They live in our house.
4
SPEAKER_01
They live in their house.
4
SPEAKER_03
All right, we re so far behind.
4
SPEAKER_03
Let s get Caroline on the phone.
4
SPEAKER_01
We had to work on my meet Q. Man, that was.
4
SPEAKER_01
Six, seven.
4
SPEAKER_03
I m intimidated.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hello.
4
SPEAKER_03
Hello.
4
SPEAKER_03
Hi.
4
SPEAKER_03
Is this Caroline?
4
SPEAKER_00
This is Caroline.
4
SPEAKER_00
How are you guys?
4
SPEAKER_03
Good.
4
SPEAKER_03
How are you?
4
SPEAKER_03
Good.
4
SPEAKER_00
Just waiting in nervous anticipation.
4
SPEAKER_03
I m sorry.
4
SPEAKER_03
We just had a meet cute that turned into a meet cute for Monica.
4
SPEAKER_00
Double meet cute.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, that s the dream.
4
SPEAKER_00
Fingers crossed.
4
SPEAKER_03
We re just talking about the ethical age gap, but I m supportive.
4
SPEAKER_03
The boy we just met was 24, but he was 6 7 .
4
SPEAKER_01
big boy, daddy long legs and he s very hot and a musician.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we might get him to like 32 green light, green light, green light.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s all I m hearing.
4
SPEAKER_03
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_03
So Caroline, you have a meet cute story.
4
SPEAKER_03
What state did it take place in?
4
SPEAKER_03
I like to know regionally what s happening.
4
SPEAKER_00
Charlotte, North Carolina.
4
SPEAKER_00
Perfect.
4
SPEAKER_03
Love North Carolina.
4
SPEAKER_00
One of my favorite places.
4
SPEAKER_00
So this was in 2013 in January.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was working at a TV station there.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m a local news reporter and Ice Storm had rolled in.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was doing live shots all night about conditions, things that were happening, monitoring everything.
4
SPEAKER_03
In the field or in the studio?
4
SPEAKER_00
In the field.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m the one who s like,
4
SPEAKER_03
Standing next to the road of slush and a semi goes by and you almost get killed.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
Foreshadowing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I know.
4
SPEAKER_00
You re jumping ahead here.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it s towards the end of my shift.
4
SPEAKER_00
I worked in the evening till like 10 or 11 and a lot of people may not realize, even if.
4
SPEAKER_00
you re on air a lot of times you do shooting and editing as well.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you re kind of doing the camera work oftentimes, especially in smaller markets.
4
SPEAKER_00
They were like, okay, we have reports of downed power lines at this intersection.
4
SPEAKER_00
Can you go check it out?
4
SPEAKER_00
Get some video, bring that back to us.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I m like, sure, no problem.
4
SPEAKER_00
Head out there.
4
SPEAKER_03
Really quick, Caroline, part of this seems really, really fun.
4
SPEAKER_03
Like almost like you re a police officer.
4
SPEAKER_03
Like we got a report of this, go find it and sniff around.
4
SPEAKER_03
Isn t that sound a little fun, Monica?
4
SPEAKER_03
You re getting like real time challenges.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_03
I think I would like this.
4
SPEAKER_00
Journalists are the one heading towards the disaster when everyone s.
4
SPEAKER_00
heading away, so I think there s something in us that compels us to do that.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I pulled up.
4
SPEAKER_00
Of course, the intersection was dark.
4
SPEAKER_00
I kind of pulled up in a driveway.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m a little bit farther back.
4
SPEAKER_00
I start shooting video.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s pretty deserted out.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s still raining.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s freezing.
4
SPEAKER_00
And two cars end up careening through the intersection, not stopping.
4
SPEAKER_00
They hit each other.
4
SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
4
SPEAKER_00
And that sends one into me at 35, 40 miles an hour.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my goodness.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I went flying about 40 feet.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh!
4
SPEAKER_03
You got hit by the car in your body.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh, we re about to lose the computer power wise.
4
SPEAKER_03
You want to run?
4
SPEAKER_03
Sorry.
4
SPEAKER_03
We got the low battery signal.
4
SPEAKER_00
I thought you meant mine.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, I double checked everything.
4
SPEAKER_03
You are someone who I can see already.
4
SPEAKER_03
You triple checked everything.
4
SPEAKER_00
Are you a Virgo?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I m a Libra.
4
SPEAKER_03
I don t either, but congrats.
4
SPEAKER_03
I m going to look.
4
SPEAKER_03
Is that a cat?
4
SPEAKER_01
I think that scales.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you do feel very balanced.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ll take that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_03
So you get plowed into by a car going 35.
4
SPEAKER_03
Holy fuck.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
So luckily, a good Samaritan witnessed this whole thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
She came and found me, got me to the hospital.
4
SPEAKER_00
So essentially, I had broken my pelvis in two places, my lower back.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, fuck.
4
SPEAKER_00
My left arm was broken in multiple places, dislocated, and I cracked my skull in three places, traumatic brain injury, which was the biggest concern.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
My parents in Texas got the call from the neurosurgeon, like, you need to get here immediately.
4
SPEAKER_00
We don t know if she s going to make it through the night.
4
SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
4
SPEAKER_03
Your brain had swelled up.
4
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_03
Were you experiencing amnesia?
4
SPEAKER_03
Were you on a loop?
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t really remember much of that first night at all.
4
SPEAKER_00
Or really, honestly, the first kind of weeks in the hospital is kind of a blur.
4
SPEAKER_00
I remember right after I got hit, lying on the ground and feeling the rain pelting my face and knowing I couldn t do anything to shield myself and thinking, okay, something s wrong.
4
SPEAKER_00
But I don t really remember much after that.
4
SPEAKER_00
But for whatever reason, the swelling on my brain went down.
4
SPEAKER_00
I survived and the nurses in the ICU called me the miracle on the floor.
4
SPEAKER_00
They said they d never seen someone get hit that hard and survive.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it was a long recovery.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was in the hospital for a bit, surgeries, and then transferred to a full-time rehab facility for about six weeks or so.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then when I got out and I was discharged, I was still in a wheelchair for a month or so after that, doing physical therapy.
4
SPEAKER_03
Of all these injuries, which one would you say was the worst?
4
SPEAKER_03
The pelvis?
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, the brain injury in the beginning was definitely the worst.
4
SPEAKER_00
Sensitive to light, couldn t even open my eyes, just like the sheer pain is just hard to even describe.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then after that, the toughest recovery, honestly, was the shoulder because I ended up having a big plate, lots of screws.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, needless to say, through this whole process, I had to have help to go to the bathroom, to take a shower.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was 24, didn t have any independence during that time.
4
SPEAKER_00
Same age as my suitor.
4
SPEAKER_00
So he s probably very mature.
4
SPEAKER_00
I think I handled it okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you re right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
So when I finally was walking again, got out of the wheelchair, what does a 24-year-old want to do?
4
SPEAKER_00
I want to go out.
4
SPEAKER_00
I wasn t drinking.
4
SPEAKER_00
I wasn t that dumb.
4
SPEAKER_00
I knew I was still in a delicate condition.
4
SPEAKER_03
But you had gotten cabin fever from the injuries.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s like, you need to get out.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
So this was my first night out.
4
SPEAKER_00
My friends took me to a bar.
4
SPEAKER_00
I still have like a really big arm sling from the surgery.
4
SPEAKER_00
But that s kind of the only visible sign of anything that had happened.
4
SPEAKER_00
So we re having a fun night.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s kind of a dive bar.
4
SPEAKER_00
There s like a short hallway and there s the men s and women s restrooms next to each other.
4
SPEAKER_00
So when you re kind of lined up, you re all waiting in line together.
4
SPEAKER_00
So this guy across from me in line, of course, was like,
4
SPEAKER_00
Looking at my sling, he s like, okay, what happened to you?
4
SPEAKER_00
And I kind of just start telling the story and we re like inching forward.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right before I get in the door, he like stops me.
4
SPEAKER_00
He s like, wait, I got to ask you something.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m like, okay, what s up?
4
SPEAKER_00
Are you right-handed or left-handed?
4
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, oh, I m right-handed.
4
SPEAKER_00
Why?
4
SPEAKER_00
He s like, oh, good.
4
SPEAKER_00
I just wanted to make sure you could wipe your own ass.
4
SPEAKER_03
Sure, sure, sure.
4
SPEAKER_00
I kind of laughed, but I was taken aback and I was like, dude, I got it.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s aiming for the fences.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s going right at it.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m good.
4
SPEAKER_00
I can handle my own business.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thanks for checking.
4
SPEAKER_00
And honestly, didn t think that much of it, but my friend in the bathroom had heard the whole thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
And when she came out, she was like, who was this guy?
4
SPEAKER_00
I got to meet him.
4
SPEAKER_00
I can t believe he said that.
4
SPEAKER_00
So we chatted, he got my number.
4
SPEAKER_00
A couple of days later, took me out to dinner and fell in love pretty quickly after that.
4
SPEAKER_00
2017, we got married.
4
SPEAKER_00
And at our wedding, instead of throwing out a bouquet, I had saved that sling because I just had a hunch about that night.
4
SPEAKER_00
I threw that out.
4
SPEAKER_00
I figured it was much more practical for my single friends, but also kind of a way to acknowledge to our friends and family who had helped me through that process.
4
SPEAKER_03
You ll never actually need a garter, but you could need a sling.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s actually could be a practical.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s a gift.
4
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s useful.
4
SPEAKER_00
And as I told people, and my now husband didn t like this part of the story, but I was like, I ve never been hit on more in my life than when I was wearing this sling.
4
SPEAKER_00
Cause it s like such an easy in, it s like that approachable.
4
SPEAKER_03
It s just an icebreaker.
4
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
That s what dogs do and kids do.
4
SPEAKER_03
They just give you some, it s all about putting yourself out there.
4
SPEAKER_01
This is the theme of today.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like you wear like cool boot, like you wear a sling.
4
SPEAKER_01
You invite some conversation.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_03
So you guys have been together for nine or ten years now?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it was ten years that we had met each other this year, and we have three little kiddos.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh.
4
SPEAKER_03
And are you still doing reporting?
4
SPEAKER_00
I am.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh, wonderful.
4
SPEAKER_03
So if we were in Charlotte and we turned on the local news, would we see you?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I m actually in Dallas now.
4
SPEAKER_03
Okay, and if I turned on the TV there, I would see you.
4
SPEAKER_00
You would, yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
Do you ever run into Gordon Keith?
4
SPEAKER_01
I do not.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh, I feel like you guys should.
4
SPEAKER_03
You re in the same business.
4
SPEAKER_01
Maybe that ll be your next me cute.
4
SPEAKER_03
Well, no, it doesn t.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they don t have to end in marriage and children.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_03
It ended in friendship with Caroline and a baby.
4
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but you know, never would have anticipated that pickup line would work or that the worst thing that had happened to me in some weird roundabout way led to the best.
4
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, because you were probably very career driven.
4
SPEAKER_03
If you re on the side of a fucking snowy road with your own camera gear, you re on it, right?
4
SPEAKER_03
And you might not have slowed down long enough.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s true.
4
SPEAKER_03
To even be open to this.
4
SPEAKER_00
No, and we don t run in the same circles.
4
SPEAKER_00
So, I mean, who knows if that night with the sling, the bar, a million ways it could have gone.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh, man.
4
SPEAKER_03
I love it.
4
SPEAKER_03
Caroline, that was very sweet and wonderful.
4
SPEAKER_03
I mean, it starts with a big tragedy, of course, but talk about making lemonade out of lemons.
4
SPEAKER_00
I know, I was like, they re going to think I m going to meet like some doctor or nurse.
4
SPEAKER_00
That is what I thought.
4
SPEAKER_00
It takes a turn.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_03
Firefighter carrying her off to the side of the road.
4
SPEAKER_00
Love it.
4
SPEAKER_03
Oh, that was wonderful.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thanks for sharing that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Of course, Monica, I have to tell you, go Dawgs.
4
SPEAKER_00
My husband is from where you re from and he s the biggest Georgia fan.
4
SPEAKER_03
Are they undefeated still?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_03
They are.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s why our third child is my favorite because since the day she was born and she s almost two, they have not lost a single game.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_02
She s a good one.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, for lots of reasons, but mainly football.
5
SPEAKER_05
The most important.
5
SPEAKER_03
Well, wonderful meeting you, Caroline.
5
SPEAKER_03
Thanks for telling us that story.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s so nice to meet you guys.
5
SPEAKER_00
I listen to you all the time.
5
SPEAKER_00
So awesome to chat with you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
5
SPEAKER_04
Right back at you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Have a great day.
5
SPEAKER_00
Y all too.
5
SPEAKER_04
Oh, that was sweet.
5
SPEAKER_04
That was sweet.
5
SPEAKER_04
Good idea.
5
SPEAKER_04
We ll have to do that again.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s life affirming.
5
SPEAKER_04
It is.
5
SPEAKER_04
Love you.
5
SPEAKER_02
Love you.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do you wanna sing a tune or something?
5
SPEAKER_01
Or a theme song?
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay, great.
5
SPEAKER_05
We don t have a theme song for this new show, so here I go, go, go.
5
SPEAKER_05
We re gonna ask some random questions, and with the help of our juries, we ll get some suggestions on the fly, right?