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All of us are manifesting every day.
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Most of us do it very inefficiently because everybody sits and says, I want X, Y, or Z, or I wish for this to happen.
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There are techniques you can use that can maximize the potential for you manifesting your intentions.
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a best-selling author, international speaker, Professor Jim Doty.
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Dr. James Doty, what a pleasure to have you.
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The one and only... Great teacher, Dr. James Doty.
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Never forget the power each of you has when you walk in this world with love and not fear.
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The universe doesn t give a f*** about you.
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Because it has no f***s to give, there is not some external entity deciding your fate because you re a good or a bad guy.
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Yeah.
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Once you unleash this understanding of the power you have, then you can do almost anything.
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You just have to believe.
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What would you say is something that we should think about first thing in the morning to set us up for a daily rhythm of manifesting?
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Now, I ll tell you what I do.
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Welcome back everyone to the School of Greatness.
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Very excited about our guest.
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We have the inspiring James Doty in the house.
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Doctor, good to see you.
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Thanks for being here.
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I am fascinated by this topic of manifestation.
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And I m even more fascinated when you bring neuroscience research and studies that back the power of manifestation.
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Your new book, Mind Magic, the neuroscience of manifestation and how it changes everything, I m very excited about because you kind of walk us through these different steps on the process
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of manifestation.
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So first I wanted to ask you a question about the difference between the law of attraction and manifestation.
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Are they the same thing or are they different?
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Well, if you look historically at the Law of Attraction, it goes back to Hermetics, which is this group in the first or second century AD, and there was this belief in the mind, and they used the terminology, the Law of Attraction.
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And of course, then there s a guy, I think his name, Phineas Quimby, who then promoted this further, and this was in the 18th century or so, and then of course,
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or 19th century, and then we had, who was it?
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Thinking Grow Rich.
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Napoleon Hill.
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Yes, and sort of continued on that path.
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So, it is this narrative that there is this universal power that when you want something, if you, whatever, use the right methods, you will get it.
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And it s of course been embraced by the,
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group who sort of promotes woo-woo and pseudoscience.
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And that s not to say there s not a kernel of truth, but it s been surrounded by all sorts of other aspects that I think diminish the actual power of it.
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So there is power in the law of attraction.
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Well, you could say it s synonymous.
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The manner in which it is used is synonymous with manifestation.
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The question is, I think more importantly, all of us are manifesting every day, right?
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Most of us do it very inefficiently.
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Right.
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You know, because everybody sits and says, I want X, Y, or Z, or I wish for this to happen.
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I think there are techniques you can use that can maximize the potential for you manifesting your intentions.
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So learning how the brain works and how those techniques work, maximize that.
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So you go, it s like an athlete, as you well know, you know, if you ve never been taught something, you try it for the first time, you sort of stumble through it.
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Frankly, most people stumble through life, right?
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And then as you practice it, or you learn from people who, you know, have the knowledge, then you perfect it.
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And then you understand the,
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if you want to say, the neuroscience underpinnings of it and how you make these what we call cognitive brain networks interact.
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And then you ve taken it from sort of, well, it might happen, I thought about it, to there s a high likelihood it will happen.
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People talk about the conscious mind and the subconscious mind.
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What is at play when we start to think about things we want to manifest and actually actualizing them in the physical material world?
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Is it the conscious mind or the subconscious mind that is driving this manifestation process?
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Well, that s an excellent question.
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So the key is, how do you get information which sticks into your subconscious?
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So just saying, I want this, it may or may not work.
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Because again, we re also distracted by all sorts of stuff.
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As an example, we have about 10 million bits of information coming in through our sensory organs every second.
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10 million?
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Million, yes.
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And we re only able to process on a conscious level 50 to 100.
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Okay, so now most of that goes to maintaining homeostasis or functioning of our body systems on an unconscious level.
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But we have actually access to our subconscious level, and you can learn that through different techniques, and then utilize those to maximize the input.
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And so when I say you have 50 to 100 bits,
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You can use part of that to consciously embed your intention if you know how to do that.
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Interesting.
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Wow.
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OK.
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And as a brain surgeon and a neuroscientist yourself, what did you learn through working on physical brains, the matter, as well as neuroscience in terms of, I guess, creating this for your life, a more harmonious, abundant life, studying both the brain and the mind?
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Well, in some ways, I mean, being a neurosurgeon is a physical task.
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And it s not as if there are little signs on the brain that tell you where everything is.
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Now, certainly, we know from anatomy, generally,
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where things are, but you have to remember, I mean, there s a subset of people who, you know, we talk about our speech center being on the left side, but there s a subset of people that s on the right side.
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Really?
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Yes.
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How do you know that?
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You don t, unless there s something that interferes with it, or you specifically test for it.
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So, in general, the anatomy is pretty consistent.
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But, you know, it s like looking at somebody, you know, you re tall, there s a short person, and that s the way the brain works.
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Not everyone is wired the same way or has everything in the exact spot.
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And in fact, as an example, let s say you play the violin, the homunculus, which is both the sensory and motor area that
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has different representations of body parts.
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If you re a violinist, the area associated with your hand or hands get dramatically increased in size compared to other parts of your brain.
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And in fact, the same is true with certain types of meditation practices.
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So you can have a profound effect on your brain
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physical brain and certainly you have power over your mind and in some ways that s what we re talking about is and this goes back you mentioned the law of attraction you know all is in the mind and I think in fact some of the things you talk about you understand
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that when you are disciplined and can get access, you can make things happen.
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And whether it s a physical challenge or a mental challenge, but you have to understand how to get access.
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So how do we get access?
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I m not gonna tell you until you buy the book.
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Well, one of the things you talk about in the book is this phenomenon of vibration.
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And, you know, it s interesting because there s brainwaves, but there s also heart energy or vibration as well.
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And I think you mentioned about how the heart vibration is actually, I don t know, 10 or 15 times more powerful than the brainwaves, I think, correct?
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Yeah, actually, you can measure the vibrational energy from the heart at five or six feet away.
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And you know, this is where it gets confusing between the woo-woo and the reality, because a lot of people will wrap all sorts of other baggage onto that.
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But it s true.
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And the interesting thing about that, though, is, and I m sure you appreciated it, you can meet people who have an energy about them and a presence about them.
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and it makes you feel good.
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And typically these are people who are nonjudgmental, accepting, open, and respect who you are as a person.
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They don t look down at you.
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And you want to be around those people.
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And those people emit this very positive energy.
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That s interesting, yeah.
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And so it s interesting also because, as an example,
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If you have a group of women who live together, over a period of months, their menstrual cycles will match.
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Really?
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Yes.
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Why is that?
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Well, it s the nature of this vibrational energy, and I talk about it in the book.
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And in fact, if you took a metronome, like add five or six metronomes lined up,
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and watch them and they re on the same table vibrating, they will all get in sync over a period of time.
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And so this idea of vibration has actually an influence on things.
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On other things?
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Yeah.
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So if I m acting chaotic and I m constantly in the state of chaos, if I m around someone else, I may influence them to create that type of vibration as well.
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Or vice versa, they might influence me if they re calmer for me to get calm.
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Yes, yes, absolutely.
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And in fact... Which one wins?
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Oh, that s a good question.
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I mean, it depends on how powerful that energy is.
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And that energy can be very powerful, negative or positive.
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Wow.
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And of course, I think you would agree, most people try to avoid being around negative people.
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Of course.
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You know, there s a saying that, what do they call them?
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Energy eaters, I think.
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Yes.
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You re around them.
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In fact, I got called by a woman the other day and I just dread getting a call from her ever because it always turns into a drama about her and you sit there and it s just over and over again and it s sad because
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And we can talk about this more.
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All of us carry baggage from our childhoods, right?
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Yes.
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And until you are aware that the baggage you carry has an influence on every decision you make, every relationship you have, you can t change.
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As an example, I m sure you ve seen situations where individuals repeatedly pick an abusive partner over and over again.
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I don t understand why this happens to me.
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Because you have created that energy that allows that to happen.
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blaming, I m just saying that this is truth.
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So if you never understood, as an example, that while when I was a kid I had an abusive father and, you know, he would be mean to me or hurt me, the problem is, you know, that becomes familiar to you and even though it s painful and hurts you,
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It is something that s associated with a love figure.
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Interesting.
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And it s really very sad, actually.
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I mean, a lot of our programming and conditioning sounds like it is wired in us at a very young age.
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And we have been conditioned by 7, 8, 9, 10 to have a set of beliefs, way of thinking, and a way of feeling around our environments and relationships.
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And then we live with it for 10, 20, 30 years until we start to become aware of it.
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Hopefully sooner, but we kind of repeat these patterns until there s a breakdown or there s a sadness or a breakup or something that gets us to wake up.
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How hard is it to change our belief systems that have been wired in us for decades?
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Well, it s very hard.
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I mean, you see it every day.
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You see people who become addicted to alcohol and drugs.
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And, you know, it s not because they want to live that life.
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It s because they re in such pain from the baggage they carry and they have no way out.
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That s the coping mechanism.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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And so it s very sad.
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And as you pointed out, until there is a profound, painful event that gets their attention, many of them won t change.
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Is it possible for people to change if they don t go through some type of painful, dramatic event?
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Well, there s a saying, the teacher comes when the student s ready.
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If the student s not ready, it s hard to change.
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Now, don t get me wrong.
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There s certainly instances where somebody wakes up one day and they go, I don t like this.
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I feel horrible.
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I ve just ruined this relationship.
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I need to have an internal assessment of myself and talk to some people to give me insight.
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Yes, you can do that.
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But it s hard.
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For me, as an example, as a child, I learned a sort of a manifestation technique from a woman in a magic shop.
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And this is actually about my first book, which is called Into the Magic Shop, A Neurosurgeon s Quest to Discover the Mysteries of the Brain and the Secrets of the Heart.
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And that story is about my own childhood growing up in poverty with an alcoholic father.
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and a mother who had had a stroke when I was a child, was partially paralyzed, had a seizure disorder, and chronically depressed, and attempted suicide multiple times.
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And we were on public assistance.
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Well, you can imagine overcoming that baggage is very, very hard.
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But this is also an example of how one person can intervene and change somebody s life.
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And so what happened was I had an interest in magic.
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And thus, actually, the name of this book is My Magic.
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And it ended up, when my parents would, some event would happen, which was traumatic, I would get on my bicycle and ride as far and as fast away as I could.
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And I ended up at a strip mall, and there s a magic shop there.
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And I walked in and there was a woman there who was, as I described, this radiant person with this incredible smile whose very presence embraced you.
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And I was 12.
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And I was filled with despair, hopelessness.
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It turned out she was the owner s mother.
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She knew nothing about magic.
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Really?
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Yes.
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But we began a conversation and she was giving me chocolate chip cookies, which was great.
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Exactly what you needed at that time.
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But the thing is, she asked me actually some personal questions, which frankly,
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You know, who wants to tell somebody you re poor, your father s an alcoholic?
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But I answered her questions, and after a while she said to me, she said, you know, I really like you.
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I think I can teach you something that could really help you.
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And what she taught me was what we would now call a mindfulness practice.
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Because as you know, talking about baggage, when you grow up in a unpredictable, chaotic environment,
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You re essentially in a war zone every day.
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Yes.
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As a result, it chronically stimulates your sympathetic nervous system or your flight, fight or fear response.
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And what happens is that affects your brain in the sense that it cuts down options because you re looking at the shortest distance you have to go to survive.
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As a result, you can never relax.
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You re always fidgety.
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You re always looking around because you never know what s going to happen next.
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So she taught me a technique, what we d call a body survey now, how to relax your body.
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And then she taught me how to concentrate, in this case, by looking at a candle and doing a breathing exercise.
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And these are the fundamental techniques associated with the mindfulness practice, because then it shifts you from engagement of your sympathetic nervous system to engagement of your parasympathetic nervous system, which is really where we should live.
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You re open, you re thoughtful, you have access to your executive control areas in the brain in terms of memory and experience, and you re much more creative.
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And so when you re able to make that shift, that changes how you look at the world.
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The other problem is from these types of backgrounds, but I would say essentially everyone,
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we have a negative dialogue going on in our head.
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An inner critic.
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Yes, and as much as, you know, people say, you know, I always ask this question when I give a talk, and, you know, almost everybody raises their head, and then this, I m done.
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You go, look, dude, you re lying, man.
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Everybody has an inner critic.
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It s just some are much more powerful than others.
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And so she also taught me to recognize that that wasn t truth.
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The inner critic.
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Yes, because if you, and being an athlete, I m sure you know, if you tell yourself it s not possible, by definition, it is not possible.
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It cannot happen.
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And so when people listen to that, they are giving their self-agency away.
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And in some ways, this is the nature of how we take control of our manifestation.
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And as you know from the first sentence in the book, it says the universe doesn t give a f**k about you because it has no f**k to give.
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There is not some external entity deciding your fate because you re a good or a bad guy.
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but we have immense power within us to control our destiny.
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And when you give it away and listen to that critic, then you re limiting your beliefs.
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So the key is how do you unlimit your beliefs, if you will, and that is understanding the incredible power you have within yourself.
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When you sit there and say every day, I m not worthy, I don t deserve love, it s not possible, I m an imposter, I can t do it,
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It s as if you re building a prison for yourself with bricks and the wall gets higher and it gets darker and you feel more and more powerless and you feel like there s
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some external force controlling your life.
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When you understand within you is an incredible power to change your destiny,
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and you have that power, and finally you recognize it, then extraordinary things can happen.
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And this is how you go from you being in charge, or let s say a belief that others are in charge, to actually you being in charge.
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But how did, I mean, how did you learn to break free of the limiting beliefs that you had, the fight or flight?
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symptoms that you were constantly in, which I felt as a kid as well, involved very insecure, stupid and unlovable for many different reasons.
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And I was able to back it with beliefs and evidence throughout my childhood.
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How did you learn to break the limiting beliefs and create more empowering beliefs to support you to feel emotionally free and start to attract more of what you wanted in your life?
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Well, first of all, I don t want to imply that that journey s done.
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You know, sometimes people look at you and they go, man, you have it all together now.
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None of us have it all together, right?
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Every one of us is still a frail, fragile human being who is struggling.
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And some of us are a little further on that journey.
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Others continue to have difficulty.
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But interacting with this woman made me see the world through a different lens.
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Because when you have negative statements that you tell yourself repeatedly, as I said, that takes away your agency, your own power.
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You feel powerless.
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Yes.
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But the thing is, then when you re beating up yourself, and you re typically the most critical person of yourself than anyone you know,
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Then you look through the lens of being critical to everyone else.
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Interesting.
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So when we are critical of ourselves, does that support us in creating great relationships with others?
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No.
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Oftentimes, it s very damaging because you re always thinking of, oh, well, they re going to cheat on me.
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They re going to lie because you re telling yourself these types of narratives.
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And so it s hard to be authentic.
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When you re critical of self.
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Yes, yes.
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And this goes back to a whole other discussion, if you will, about,
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If you look at the Blue Zones, as an example, obviously we re jumping around all over the place here.
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Sure, sure, sure.
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Loma Linda s right down the street, an hour away, one of the Blue Zones.
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Yes, of course.
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But if you look at the Blue Zones, or you look at the work of the Harvard Longevity or Adult Development Study, it s called.
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But this is the work of Robert Waldinger.
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Centuries ago, when we lived in villages, we were born there.
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We had a community that even with our flaws still loved us and watched out for us and taught us lessons.
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We had our parents, our siblings, our grandparents in proximity to us.
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And the very nature of that, actually, you don t have that negative dialogue going on, okay?
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It is the negative dialogue that s extraordinarily unhealthy.
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Because you see, when you re always
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stressed and anxious and negative towards yourself.
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Well, what does this do?
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This stimulates your sympathetic nervous system, which then does what?
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It results in the production of inflammatory proteins, which of course are associated with chronic disease states.
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It depresses your immune system.
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It increases the levels of stress hormones like cortisol, which on a chronic basis are very bad for you.
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Your cardiac function s impaired.
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Your blood pressure s increased.
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So all these negative aspects are activated when you re constantly hypercritical.
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Wow.
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Right?
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And then you don t feel that good.
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Right.
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You feel tired.
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You feel exhausted, drained.
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The other aspect is, as an example with my own parents, I used to have a sense that it wasn t that I wasn t loved, but I was ignored.
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I couldn t understand why they would do these actions.
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And I was angry all the time.
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And when I changed how I looked at the world, it made me much more sympathetic and kind because I realized everyone is suffering on some level.
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And the issue wasn t that they didn t care.
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The issue was they had not had tools
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to help themselves.
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To heal, to process, to regulate.
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Exactly.
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And so, you know, I m sure you ve known people, you watch them go through their lives and they constantly struggle because no one has ever shown them a different way.
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And that s the only way.
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And sometimes, I think you re probably thinking,
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Yes, I ve showed them a thousand times, but they don t listen.
2
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They re not willing.
2
SPEAKER_01
They ve got to be willing to apply, right?
2
SPEAKER_01
Back to the question of the teacher.
2
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If they re ready to, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, yes, yes.
2
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But the reason I was saying that, though, is that in many ways sets the stage for how you re going to respond.
2
SPEAKER_00
So this interaction with this woman, I was able to self-regulate.
2
SPEAKER_00
She taught you skills.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, she taught me a mindfulness practice.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you were ready for it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
2
SPEAKER_00
And so I realized once I was able to relax, once I was able to be present and attend, because you can t learn anything or change if your mind s always somewhere, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
In my example, growing up, you know, I never knew what was going to happen.
2
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So I m always worried about something happening to me.
2
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But the action is here between you and I.
2
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It s not about possibilities.
2
SPEAKER_00
And this also limits people s power, right?
2
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Because if you can t focus and attend, you can t accomplish, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
And if you re always distracted, it s not possible.
2
SPEAKER_00
So she taught me to relax.
2
SPEAKER_00
She taught me to be present.
2
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And then strange things happen because you re feeling a different type of energy
2
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coming from others and yourself.
2
SPEAKER_00
And that energy has an influence.
2
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As an example, I m sure that you ve seen the situation where you get a bad vibe from somebody on the street and you cross the street.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you are picking up something on an intuitive level.
2
SPEAKER_00
But the thing is, if you have anger and hostility yourself, you are imitating that to other people.
2
SPEAKER_00
And what I tell people is when I changed how I looked at myself, it changed how I looked at the world, and that changed how the world reacted to me.
2
SPEAKER_01
And how the world looked at you as well.
2
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
2
SPEAKER_00
So after this period of time with this woman,
2
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I was much more open, I was thoughtful, I was generous, I was kind, because I understood I had been in pain and was in pain, but so were other people.
2
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So it changed how I looked at them.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I think that s a very critical aspect of sort of maturing and sort of being on a path of self-development.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s beautiful.
2
SPEAKER_01
What would you say then is the
2
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What is the number one thought and number one emotion that blocks us from the ability to manifest greater?
2
SPEAKER_00
Fear.
2
SPEAKER_00
What type of fear?
2
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Well, it s insecurity.
2
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It s shame.
2
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And this results in you limiting your beliefs.
2
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And so in some ways, what we re talking about here actually is a decision between fear and love.
2
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And when you re fearful, this stimulates your sympathetic nervous system with all the negative aspects of it.
2
SPEAKER_00
When you love, you re open, you re generous, you re thoughtful, you re kind, because you ve engaged the parasympathetic nervous system.
2
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And you have a choice.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is like, if you look at Stoic philosophers, like somebody like Epictetus, who was a slave.
2
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He says, I cannot control my external environment.
2
SPEAKER_00
What I can control is how I react to my environment, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
So you meet people, I m sure, who say, my life s miserable, my life s horrible, while you meet other people who go, well, it s tough right now, but I m optimistic it s going to get better, or I know if I do this, it s going to get better.
2
SPEAKER_00
These are completely
2
SPEAKER_00
oppositional attitudes that have a profound, profound effect, depending on what you re believing.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
But how does someone shift their attitude into positive when they re in a suffering state and they feel like they re a victim to so many different things happening to them?
2
SPEAKER_01
Sure.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, I can t sit here and say, you do this and your life s going to be perfect.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s some situations either because of, as an example, structural racism that s built into the system.
2
SPEAKER_00
or chronic poverty, because throughout the world, and even in America, the ability to overcome poverty, for most, it s highly unlikely that s going to happen.
2
SPEAKER_00
So yes, you do have power, but it s not necessarily, I m gonna change it, and everything s gonna be perfect for me.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I m sure things are not perfect for you, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
And no matter how much you try or want, well, externally, things may look fantastic,
2
SPEAKER_00
It s not perfect, and it s not the way you necessarily want.
3
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And I have to say the same thing.
3
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But there are people who, yeah, no matter how hard they re going to work, it s going to be very challenging.
3
SPEAKER_00
That being said, what we do know is there are certain practices and rules.
3
SPEAKER_00
And if you are going to get out of something, or if you are going to change things, then the best way to do that, which has the highest likelihood of success, is to go through some of the things that we re talking about here.
3
SPEAKER_00
And one of those is that, as an example, there is a tendency for us to want to achieve, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
And if you re an athlete, you have a goal you set there.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, goals are fine, but if you focus only on the goal and have no concern about any of the other things that are going on, then you reach the goal and there s nothing there.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yet, what we do know, the greatest cause of suffering is what?
3
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It s attachment and craving.
3
SPEAKER_00
Desires.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
3
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And the thing is, when that is your absolute focus, and we can t all get these things, you re going to be highly disappointed and you ve ignored all the people in your life as you focus solely on that.
3
SPEAKER_00
And unfortunately, many people learn that lesson
3
SPEAKER_00
far along after they ve destroyed their families, they ve been through multiple marriages, their kids don t like them, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Because they ve been chasing a result or a goal or a dream, but neglecting everything else.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, because again, as I was saying even about myself, I thought, well, if I just do this,
3
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you know, my shame and insecurity will go away.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ll be loved by everybody and my life will be perfect.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yet at every one of those peaks, all I had was disappointment.
3
SPEAKER_00
And while everyone told me life was great, I did not feel that inside because I had not understood that I was the only one who had the key to the self-created prison.
3
SPEAKER_00
And until you realize that, you re on a very difficult path.
3
SPEAKER_01
So if we re coming from a place of insecurity, fear, or lack, and we re saying, you know what?
3
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I want to manifest.
3
SPEAKER_01
I want to create more for myself.
3
SPEAKER_01
I want to have more money.
3
SPEAKER_01
I want to have more opportunities, accomplishments, success.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that s what I want.
3
SPEAKER_01
I desire these things.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I start to apply some of the practices of manifesting and creating more abundance in my life.
3
SPEAKER_01
But if I create those external results and I haven t shifted the insecurities or the shame, what happens next?
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, you end up the way I did, which is you have everything and you re incredibly unhappy.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you can still manifest and attract what you want and create what you want and accomplish goals, but it s not going to make you feel different about yourself.
3
SPEAKER_00
It might actually make you feel worse.
3
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
3
SPEAKER_00
And this is why I was telling you about the story about the woman, because I was 12.
3
SPEAKER_00
And she taught me a visualization technique or manifestation technique, which is actually the origin of where this book came from.
3
SPEAKER_00
So at 12, she said, I want you to write down 10 things that you want.
3
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Well, again, unfortunately in Western capitalist society.
3
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And a 12-year-old, you sit there and think of what people want in that environment.
3
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They want money, they want cars, they want girls.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah, I wanted a Rolex watch because a friend of mine s father had one, and it looked so amazing to me, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
I wanted a silver Porsche Targa.
3
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I wanted a mansion overlooking the ocean, et cetera, et cetera.
3
SPEAKER_01
A 12.
3
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Yes.
3
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And I wanted a million dollars, which nowadays would probably be about $100 million.
3
SPEAKER_00
But anyway, and I got
3
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Absolutely every one of those things.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I was more miserable than I had ever been.
3
SPEAKER_00
And the interesting thing about that is that, and this is in some ways the point of this book, because again, the average person thinks they know what they want, they don t understand what they need.
3
SPEAKER_00
And that s the critical aspect here.
3
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What s the difference between knowing what we want and having what we need?
3
SPEAKER_00
So, as you know, there s what we call hedonic happiness.
3
SPEAKER_00
So the list I just gave you relates to pleasure and hedonic happiness.
3
SPEAKER_00
I want, it will make me feel good about myself, I, I, I. That is the worst thing you can do if you want to manifest the best.
3
SPEAKER_00
Really?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
When you make it about self.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes, because in some ways,
3
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You re talking about insecurity.
3
SPEAKER_00
The driver of that is insecurity, fear, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
And not enough.
3
SPEAKER_00
And not enough.
3
SPEAKER_00
And especially poor people look through the lens of not enough.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so when you re acting by a belief based on fear, that has a negative effect on these cognitive brain networks.
3
SPEAKER_00
Now, it doesn t mean it s not possible.
3
SPEAKER_00
It just means that
3
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you re limiting yourself.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so we talk about this idea of hedonic or selfish happiness, and this is transitory, it s shallow, it doesn t last long, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Eudaimonic happiness is a sense of purpose and that actually is
3
SPEAKER_00
in terms of benefiting others, it s not about yourself.
3
SPEAKER_00
And the key to that, though, is that when you look through the lens, and we re talking about looking through the lens of compassion, what happens is that you then change how you see the world and what you need, not what you want.
3
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right.
3
SPEAKER_00
You see, and that changes everything because you realize when you re of service, when you re caring for others,
3
SPEAKER_00
you don t necessarily need, having that big house or the Porsche isn t gonna make you whole.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so you probably don t chase that anymore because it s a chimera that you re focused on because you think it s going to help get rid of the shame and the emptiness.
3
SPEAKER_00
You see, so it s a different mindset.
3
SPEAKER_00
So when you shift to the parasympathetic nervous system, that activates all of your brain networks.
3
SPEAKER_00
and allows them to sync together, if you will, and then has the highest likelihood of manifesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
So what I m hearing you say, and correct me if I m wrong, when we come from a place of lack and wanting more for personal gain by itself,
3
SPEAKER_01
it s not going to bring us the ultimate level of happiness.
3
SPEAKER_01
Versus when we come from a place of wanting to create more to serve or impact others in some way that is connected to a purpose, a greater purpose, we will have more fulfillment and hopefully manifest exactly what we need.
3
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s exactly right.
3
SPEAKER_00
And that summarizes it.
3
SPEAKER_00
That is the fundamental key here.
3
SPEAKER_00
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I can tell you, for myself,
3
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As I said, I did get everything I wanted and I was miserable.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then I went through this period where I d been very successful in business and
3
SPEAKER_00
during the dot-com period, and I had $80 million or so.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then the crash came.
3
SPEAKER_00
I was $3 million in debt.
3
SPEAKER_00
But I had been miserably unhappy anyway.
3
SPEAKER_01
With $80 million or negative $3 million?
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, there was not much difference, actually.
3
SPEAKER_00
Really?
3
SPEAKER_01
When you had $80 million of, I guess, net worth,
3
SPEAKER_01
in the bank or on paper, how did that make you feel?
3
SPEAKER_01
Did you feel any better about your self-worth?
3
SPEAKER_01
No.
3
SPEAKER_00
Really?
3
SPEAKER_00
No, not a bit.
3
SPEAKER_01
Not even for like a moment, like, oh, I ve got money now, I did this thing, and look, I proved all you wrong?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but I, yes, I proved them all wrong, but it did nothing for me.
3
SPEAKER_00
And that s my point is, you know, I, well, let me back up a little bit.
3
SPEAKER_00
Did I enjoy driving Ferraris?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Did I enjoy Porsches?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Did I enjoy having a villa in Florence?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
But that being said, I was missing so much that
3
SPEAKER_00
it limited how good I felt about any of it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Because, you know, having friends who tell you how great you are, unless you believe it, it doesn t mean anything.
3
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, I didn t believe it.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so, when the dot-com period came, I lost all this money, and I had to sell everything.
3
SPEAKER_00
So I went through this period of deep reflection.
3
SPEAKER_00
And the part of it was, what had I missed in what this woman was trying to teach me?
3
SPEAKER_00
And obviously I was 12, and I had no self-awareness.
3
SPEAKER_00
But the other thing that happened is, even though I was a doctor helping people, my actions, though, were based on, I want people to see I m a doctor, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Status.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes, status.
3
SPEAKER_00
Acknowledgement.
3
SPEAKER_00
Look at me.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, yeah, I m the doctor.
3
SPEAKER_00
I live in this mansion overlooking the ocean.
3
SPEAKER_00
I have all of these cars.
3
SPEAKER_00
I come into the hospital and everyone praises me, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
That was out of my own insecurity and anxiety and fear.
3
SPEAKER_00
When I went through this period of self-reflection, I really understood
4
SPEAKER_01
that and then it changed, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Because it was no longer
4
SPEAKER_01
About me, it was about other people.
4
SPEAKER_01
And as an example, I mentioned Jim Carrey.
4
SPEAKER_01
I love that part about this, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
I love the story of the $10 million check and the whole thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
But what he said with his audience was, when he started, it was all about his own ego being involved.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then he realized, though, he was there for a purpose to be of service to the people.
4
SPEAKER_01
And in fact, Jimmy Page with Led Zeppelin, I don t know if you ever heard this story, he used to get really angry because he d always be asked to play Stairway to Heaven.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he said, it used to make me boil over because I had new music, I did all of this, but everyone wanted to listen to Stairway to Heaven.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he said, then I realized it s not about me, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
It s about serving others.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
And what they want.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
And they had grown up with this.
4
SPEAKER_01
They had an emotional attachment to it because it represented events in their lives that were positive.
4
SPEAKER_01
And they just wanted to experience that.
4
SPEAKER_01
And so he was being very selfish by looking through that same lens.
4
SPEAKER_01
And again, this is what we get into.
4
SPEAKER_01
So when you change how you look at the world,
4
SPEAKER_01
It changes everything.
4
SPEAKER_01
And again, this is a choice that each of us can make.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
As a, you know, as someone who s been a doctor and a neuroscientist, neurosurgeon for many years, researching this work for a long time, what is the biggest challenge you face at this season of your life when it comes to manifesting that you still have yet to overcome or are overcoming?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, one of the things I learned is not to have attachment.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
To what?
4
SPEAKER_01
To anything.
4
SPEAKER_01
And look, it s not perfect.
4
SPEAKER_01
But my point is, and yes, if you d say, well, what about your child or your wife and something?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
But that being said, the nature of life is disappointments oftentimes.
4
SPEAKER_01
we cause our own suffering by having these attachments.
4
SPEAKER_01
And so, do I like nice cars?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I drive a Porsche.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I ve worked very hard.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ve given immense amounts to other people.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have no bad feeling about those things.
4
SPEAKER_01
But what I can tell you is if all of it goes away tomorrow, it will have no impact on my mental state.
4
SPEAKER_01
And that is the key because you see.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s freedom.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes, that s exactly right.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because if you grow up in poverty, what is the thing that binds you or holds you or imprisons you?
4
SPEAKER_01
Money.
4
SPEAKER_01
So when I lost everything, and then I had this choice of this stock
4
SPEAKER_01
that I could give away to charity or not, I chose to give it away, which was $30 million, but giving it away liberated me.
4
SPEAKER_01
I just don t care anymore.
4
SPEAKER_01
It no longer imprisoned me, you see.
4
SPEAKER_01
And that is a level, you know, it takes time and work to get to.
4
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, many people, my wife said when I gave all that money, she said, there was an article in the Wall Street Journal, she goes, I don t mind him giving money away, I just wish he hadn t given it all away.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m curious, you know, is it a bad thing for people to want to have,
4
SPEAKER_00
material possessions, a nice car, a nice home, you know, a million dollars in their bank account or nice clothes.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is that a bad thing when they re thinking of manifesting because it s about them?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, if everything is about you and your narrative is always about you, I think you re going to live an unhappy life.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because you have no purpose or meaning.
4
SPEAKER_01
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
Right?
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, yes, is it cool to walk around in designer clothes and go to parties and hang out with whatever?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, sure.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s nothing wrong with that.
4
SPEAKER_01
But when every action in your life
4
SPEAKER_01
is a selfish action towards your needs, then it s a hollow existence.
4
SPEAKER_01
As an example, I know people, of course.
4
SPEAKER_01
they can t attach to a woman, they have to have the next beautiful woman, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
And their whole thing is being seen with the beautiful woman.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s not about, I care about this person, I really like her, she s really special, it s, does she have the attributes that make me look good?
4
SPEAKER_01
Or it s, God, I can t go to this event in that car of mine, I need to be in a Ferrari so people look at me, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
And that is a hollow, very selfish existence.
4
SPEAKER_01
Now, I m sure there are people who are listening who go, I m not that way.
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, you are that way.
4
SPEAKER_01
Sure.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you re saying you can have it though, but as long as you re also in, have meaning or purpose surrounding your life as well.
4
SPEAKER_00
Otherwise it ll be hollow.
4
SPEAKER_00
If you just want the material home or the bigger, bigger, bigger thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
But you can still have it.
4
SPEAKER_01
Of course.
4
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have it.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have no complaints and I work hard and I have no guilt about that whatsoever.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I still do tons of actions that are a benefit to a larger goal or mission or to a larger purpose outside of myself.
4
SPEAKER_00
You talk about these networks and vibrations.
4
SPEAKER_00
You mentioned this, the physiology of manifesting.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m curious.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is it more important to be thinking a certain intention or certain ideas or beliefs, feeling a certain emotions or physically in a vibration total body to help you manifest?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, certainly if you can bring it all together, I mean, that s the ideal.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I think one is, again, we ve talked about limited beliefs.
4
SPEAKER_01
You have to understand what causes you to limit your belief.
4
SPEAKER_01
And in some ways, it comes down to self-compassion when you re kind to yourself.
4
SPEAKER_01
then that changes your own physiology.
4
SPEAKER_01
It shifts you from the fear network.
4
SPEAKER_01
And critical network into compassion, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes, exactly.
4
SPEAKER_01
And so I think that s an important aspect.
4
SPEAKER_01
And again, as an example, I talk about these different networks.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s the default mode network.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s the salience network, the attention network, and the executive control network.
4
SPEAKER_01
Now, the reason I mention these is
4
SPEAKER_01
The executive control network actually gets things done if you want to put it that way.
4
SPEAKER_01
But if you re driven by fear and anxiety and insecurity.
4
SPEAKER_01
then that limits its ability to do so because you don t have full access, because that s where you have productivity and creativity.
4
SPEAKER_00
Full access to what?
4
SPEAKER_01
Your memories and past experiences.
4
SPEAKER_01
This is what the executive control network contains, and it s shut down when you re fearful or anxious.
4
SPEAKER_01
And so that s one aspect.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then, you know, the other aspect, we talk about embedding your intentions.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, you have to make that thing you want salient.
4
SPEAKER_01
What does that mean?
4
SPEAKER_01
It means it has to be something that touches you, that you really feel like it s there with you and you want it.
4
SPEAKER_01
And the reason I bring that up is because salience is
4
SPEAKER_01
it activates, if you want to call it, a bloodhound within your head where it looks around for opportunities for you to manifest.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ll give you an example.
4
SPEAKER_00
You re talking about bloodhound or you re talking about something else?
4
SPEAKER_01
It s search for things, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
It gets a scent, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, that s what they do for rescue missions, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes, yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_01
So what I mean by that is that if you re able to embed your intention
4
SPEAKER_01
That activates the salience network, which is the bloodhound, and the analogy is as follows.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m sure you have been to parties, and they re loud, and your name will be mentioned, and you ll immediately turn, even though it s in the loud.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you re like, where is this?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but that s because your identity is deeply embedded within you, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Interesting, yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
So when you do this in terms of an intention, and I ll give a recent example.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m working on a new project, and I was at a coffee shop, and again, loud everybody talking, but I heard somebody specifically talk about the project type of the thing I m doing.
4
SPEAKER_01
So I got up and introduced myself, we connected, and that s how it works because it creates these synchronicities because it s always turned on
4
SPEAKER_01
listening for opportunities, how it can make your intention happen.
4
SPEAKER_01
And another example is, as a neurosurgeon, you know, I would see patients, as an example, let s say somebody with hydrocephalus, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
And most people don t know about that.
4
SPEAKER_01
And they go, Oh, my God, I ve never heard of that before.
4
SPEAKER_01
Is that rare?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s not that rare.
5
SPEAKER_00
Obviously, if you ve seen a neurosurgeon, it s not rare to us, but what will happen is I ll see them in a few months, and they ll come in, and they re like, the most amazing thing happened.
5
SPEAKER_00
I ve run into five people with the exact same thing, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Because they have embedded that.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so they re attuned to it, and suddenly it s like it s everywhere.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you talk about synchronicities in the book.
5
SPEAKER_01
How important is
5
SPEAKER_01
finding and looking for synchronicities when it comes to manifesting?
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, I think if you do it correctly, they naturally occur over and over again.
5
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And you may think they re shocking and how did that happen?
5
SPEAKER_00
But that s because you have made your intention salient.
5
SPEAKER_00
It has grasped your attention network and it is solely focused on having that happen.
5
SPEAKER_00
And once that process occurs,
5
SPEAKER_00
then you engage your executive control network to actually then respond to it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
5
SPEAKER_01
So you set your intention for what you want to create or desire, and then your attention starts to focus on that in the world, in your environment, and you start to see where the synchronicities line up.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then you mentioned this thing called the filing clerk, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes, exactly.
5
SPEAKER_00
And that relates in some ways, first of all,
5
SPEAKER_00
One of the process, which we talked about, you know, having the ability on a conscious level to embed your intention, that is to, we call it value tag, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Which makes it important.
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SPEAKER_00
Or rather than intention.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes, yes.
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SPEAKER_00
And so once you value tag that, that becomes important in your subconscious, and then the networks start working together.
5
SPEAKER_00
To look for it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_00
Now, what I will emphasize, and I don t want to
5
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you know, completely poo-poo every article that s been written about manifesting.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, I mentioned the issues I have with the secret or other these self-serving narratives, but the reality is we know that
5
SPEAKER_00
what wires together, fires together.
5
SPEAKER_00
And my point about that is, number one, you have to work.
5
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This isn t like, oh, I thought of it, therefore it should happen.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s like anything, and we talked about it earlier.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, everybody s manifesting every day, they just do it very inefficiently, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
So when you do it efficiently, all of these things, you know, come together to have it happen.
5
SPEAKER_00
This is why
5
SPEAKER_00
As an example, what this woman in the magic shop did, and this was before, you know, these ideas sort of were out there, she made me write my list of things I wanted to manifest down.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because again, when you use every sensory organ,
5
SPEAKER_00
then again you re engaging all of these different things that go into your subconscious.
5
SPEAKER_00
So you write it down, you read it silently, you read it aloud, you look at it, you visualize, and this is what athletes do, they visualize how it s going to play out, they see themselves in that role, and the more and more you do that, the stronger
5
SPEAKER_00
That wiring is in your brain, and therefore that increases the chance of it happening.
5
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
5
SPEAKER_01
So she taught you this, you wrote it down, and you started doing these processes.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I would really do this like tens of maybe hundreds of times a day.
5
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
Over and over and over again.
5
SPEAKER_01
But it took you a while from 12 until you were able to get a million dollars in the bank, in the mansion, the Ferrari.
5
SPEAKER_01
It didn t happen in four years, I m assuming.
5
SPEAKER_01
It probably took 15 or 20 years.
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
But there was a whole process, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Because first of all, I had decided to be a doctor in fourth grade.
5
SPEAKER_00
And this was based on a professions day where a doctor came to our class.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I was so impressed by this person.
5
SPEAKER_00
that second I decided to be a doctor because he was kind, he was thoughtful, he answered my question, he appeared interested in what I had to say.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so saying if you re poor and you don t have resources saying I m going to be a doctor is easier said than done.
5
SPEAKER_00
Sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
And in fact I did have challenges but
5
SPEAKER_00
I ll tell you a couple stories though that tells you how the system works even though you haven t done all the typical things to make it work.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so I ll tell you how I got into medical school and how I got into college.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was so clueless about college, even though I said I was going to go to college, I was in a science class and there was a girl sitting next to me and she was filling out her college application.
5
SPEAKER_00
I had no clue about that.
5
SPEAKER_00
You had to apply or?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I was waiting until it was supposed to happen.
5
SPEAKER_00
Sure, sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I looked at this girl and I asked her what she was doing.
5
SPEAKER_00
She said, well, I m applying to college.
5
SPEAKER_00
And this is the application.
5
SPEAKER_00
I said, really?
5
SPEAKER_00
And she looked at me and said, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I said, well, where are you applying to?
5
SPEAKER_00
And she said, UC Irvine.
5
SPEAKER_00
And she looked at me and she said, where are you applied?
5
SPEAKER_00
I said, UC Irvine.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I said, I haven t got my application yet.
5
SPEAKER_00
She said, I have an extra one.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
There you go.
5
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And I filled that out.
5
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And I got in.
5
SPEAKER_01
Isn t that interesting, before you go on there, because you were given the opportunity that you saw that was in front of you.
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You didn t think beyond, oh, there are schools.
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SPEAKER_01
You saw something.
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You didn t know another process.
5
SPEAKER_01
You said, yeah, I m going to go there as well.
5
SPEAKER_01
And she said, here s the application.
5
SPEAKER_01
You filled it out.
5
SPEAKER_01
You got in.
5
SPEAKER_01
And you went there.
5
SPEAKER_00
Right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, no, and that s my point is, it was in there, I didn t know how it was gonna play out, but it played out, and it certainly wasn t the typical way it would play out.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, exactly.
5
SPEAKER_00
So then what happened is, you know, I had a lot of struggles.
5
SPEAKER_00
I had to leave college multiple times, as an example, get my father out of jail, or to deal with my mother who attempted suicide, which are not pleasant things to go through.
5
SPEAKER_00
No, not enjoyable.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so when I applied to medical school,
5
SPEAKER_00
The average GPA to get into medical school was 3.79 at that time, which is, you know, out of four, that s like an A minus.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
My GPA then was 2.53.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I was not going to- You and me both.
5
SPEAKER_00
Let s go.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I was not going to graduate from college.
5
SPEAKER_00
Right.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so I went to the pre-med, and of course, as you know, when you have all these quote-unquote friends, and you say, I want to be a doctor, and you know, many of my friends were pre-med, and they were the type of pre-meds who had 3.7.
5
SPEAKER_00
Sure, sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
And you know, it was very hurtful because he said, you re never going to be a doctor.
5
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That GPA, what a joke, right?
5
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Which, you know, this is your dream, right?
5
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It s painful.
5
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So anyway, I went to, we used to have to, or you used to have to have an interview with the pre-med committee.
5
SPEAKER_00
So you had to go get an appointment, and then they would write a letter of recommendation for you.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I went to the office, I asked the secretary, I said, I wanna make an appointment for my pre-med letters.
5
SPEAKER_00
She looked at me, she said, I m not gonna give you an appointment.
5
SPEAKER_00
I said, well, why?
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SPEAKER_00
You know, she had pulled out my file.
5
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She said, because it s a waste of everyone s time.
5
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Now, could you imagine a human being telling you that you re a waste of their time?
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, how hurtful.
5
SPEAKER_00
But I looked at the woman, and I said, you know, I appreciate what you re saying, but I said, I am not leaving here until you give me that appointment.
5
SPEAKER_00
I said, if you want to call security, that s fine, but I am not leaving.
5
SPEAKER_00
So she did.
5
SPEAKER_00
But imagine, so it comes time for my appointment.
5
SPEAKER_00
Now, do you remember these photos we ve seen of Putin sitting at one end of a table?
5
SPEAKER_00
He s by himself.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I go into this room, and I m at one end of this long table, and I m, what, 20 years old, maybe?
5
SPEAKER_00
And then there are these three people at the other end of the table.
5
SPEAKER_00
And the guy in the middle, he has my file.
5
SPEAKER_00
And he looks at me, he says, he takes the file, lifts it up, throws it on the table, and he says, say what you have to say so we can get this over with.
5
SPEAKER_00
Really?
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
My goodness.
5
SPEAKER_00
And you sit there, and how intimidating, and what a jerk, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
So what happened is, I looked at the guy, and I said, I am not going to let you turn me into a great point average.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m a human being.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I proceeded to lecture them for about 20 minutes.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh my goodness.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were all crying at the end.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because once you show your humanity,
5
SPEAKER_00
They can t turn away from you.
5
SPEAKER_00
They can t objectify you if you re right there in front of them and force them to look at you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so what happened is they ended up actually giving me the highest level of recommendation.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
And as I was leaving, that secretary actually was in the room.
5
SPEAKER_00
She said, listen, I want you to take this.
5
SPEAKER_00
And it was a trifold brochure for a summer enrichment program at Tulane University in New Orleans for socioeconomically disadvantaged students and minority students.
5
SPEAKER_00
And she looked at me and she said, you know, I have to tell you something, though.
5
SPEAKER_00
The deadline has passed, but I don t think that will impact you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow, right, right, right.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I called the lady, and she let me into the program, and I applied to one medical school, and got into one medical school.
6
SPEAKER_01
And I didn t have a degree.
6
SPEAKER_01
Now, to show you, though, the importance of this is that after Hurricane Katrina, the dean of the medical school went into depression and resigned.
6
SPEAKER_01
And so they were looking for a new dean.
6
SPEAKER_01
At Tulane.
6
SPEAKER_01
At Tulane.
6
SPEAKER_01
And they had a guy from Harvard, but he wanted an endowed chair.
6
SPEAKER_01
And I don t know if you re familiar with an endowed chair.
6
SPEAKER_01
So an endowed chair is a private donor, donates a lot of money.
6
SPEAKER_01
And it is a chair named after that person.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s one of the highest honors in academic medicine.
6
SPEAKER_01
Or in the university.
6
SPEAKER_01
And that money is made into an endowment.
6
SPEAKER_01
So then the professor then gets to use it for whatever they want.
6
SPEAKER_01
So it s a very prestigious thing.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I actually ended up endowing the dean s chair.
6
SPEAKER_01
you know, fast forward many years, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, which was several million dollars.
6
SPEAKER_01
So still at Tulane, the dean of the medical school is the Doty professor.
6
SPEAKER_01
I rebuilt the library after her, Katrina.
6
SPEAKER_01
And so the point of the story is no one has the ability to tell you what you can and cannot do.
6
SPEAKER_01
And in theory, by every quote criteria, I should never have gotten into medical school, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
Yet, I m one of the largest donors to the medical school.
6
SPEAKER_01
And in fact, they re actually building a Doty Center for Compassion in Medicine at Tulane.
6
SPEAKER_01
That s cool.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
So when we think that things are impossible, when we think that it can t happen,
6
SPEAKER_01
Or I don t have the criteria that is usually, don t ever believe anything anyone tells you.
6
SPEAKER_01
If I believed what so many people told me was not possible for me to do, I would never have accomplished anything.
6
SPEAKER_01
And again, it gets back to this limiting your beliefs.
6
SPEAKER_01
Once you unleash this understanding of the power you have, then you can do almost anything.
6
SPEAKER_00
You just have to believe.
6
SPEAKER_00
Absolutely.
6
SPEAKER_00
I love this story because, you know, you mentioned don t let anyone
6
SPEAKER_00
tell you what you can and can t do, I guess the challenge is so many people do believe what others say about them.
6
SPEAKER_00
They do receive the criticism or the limits that others talk about.
6
SPEAKER_00
And a lot of people hold on to those conversations and believe them as truth.
6
SPEAKER_00
And I, the thing is, I feel like,
6
SPEAKER_00
There s only one person, like you said, that can agree with the limits or disagree with those limits and that is ourselves.
6
SPEAKER_00
And at the same time, you know, everyone can tell you, you have all the skills, all the tools, all the potential, all the ability to do something great.
6
SPEAKER_00
But if you don t believe it, it s not going to matter as much.
6
SPEAKER_00
Even if everyone in the world has said, we believe in you, you re incredible.
6
SPEAKER_00
If we are limiting ourselves from receiving those words and receiving that understanding and identity, we won t accomplish what we want or we won t create the lives we want.
6
SPEAKER_00
So how do we overcome ourselves from the conversations and the critics in our own mind and also the conversations from others, whether they re positive or negative, how do we overcome it and believe we are capable?
6
SPEAKER_01
Well, first off, I would say that
6
SPEAKER_01
A lot of people, you ll hear, let s say, a statement I made, and they ll sit there and go, OK, I m going to do this tomorrow.
6
SPEAKER_01
I m going to do everything.
6
SPEAKER_01
OK, I m going to get into shape, and I m going to run 10 miles.
6
SPEAKER_01
And then I m going to study for this.
6
SPEAKER_01
And the problem is, that s the worst thing you can do.
6
SPEAKER_01
And in fact, I m sure you probably know BJ Fogg.
6
SPEAKER_01
He wrote this book, Tiny Habits.
6
SPEAKER_01
But he and I were having a conversation recently.
6
SPEAKER_01
you have to start slow, okay?
6
SPEAKER_01
Pick one simple thing to show that you have the power, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
And it could be something as simple as, I m gonna get up at six in the morning and walk around the block.
6
SPEAKER_01
And you just do that.
6
SPEAKER_01
Because what happens is, now you re changing your belief system.
6
SPEAKER_01
You re saying, I set this goal, and I was able to do it, and I do it every day now.
6
SPEAKER_01
Then it can be a little longer.
6
SPEAKER_01
and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, until suddenly you re running a marathon when before you could barely get up and walk around the block.
6
SPEAKER_01
And I think that s really the key, is start small, congratulate yourself for small wins,
6
SPEAKER_01
and accept that, and then let that sink in, and then just do another thing.
6
SPEAKER_01
And it s a slow process.
6
SPEAKER_01
Nothing happens overnight.
6
SPEAKER_01
And again, if you think, well, it s going to happen, and it s all going to be perfect tomorrow, that s not how it works.
6
SPEAKER_01
And obviously, in my own life, this has taken decades.
6
SPEAKER_01
And I think, hopefully, what this book does, though, it allows you to see the world in a different way, to use the techniques that are outlined there,
6
SPEAKER_01
to not have to go through the pain and suffering that I and others have gone through.
6
SPEAKER_01
And it gives you some insights, some tools, and again,
6
SPEAKER_01
And I m sure you ve experienced you ll get like a book sometimes go.
6
SPEAKER_01
That is what I was missing.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yes, this is what you know I need.
6
SPEAKER_01
And what I ve tried to do is both by showing you the science behind it, but also intertwining stories like I mentioned the one about Jim Carrey and I ve also included actually individuals who I have interacted with in my own life.
6
SPEAKER_01
who ve had these profound changes based on having a different perception of who they are and the power they have.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
6
SPEAKER_00
There s a part in the book where you talked about tapping into flow states.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think you even said like the placebo.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yes, and hypnosis.
6
SPEAKER_00
And hypnosis.
6
SPEAKER_00
So how do we tap into flow states, placebo effect, and hypnosis to start to manifest better?
6
SPEAKER_01
So one of the points of those examples is to show that actually, very simply, you can get there without anything, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
I mean, hypnosis, you can, and you can do self-hypnosis, of course, but I m sure most of the listeners are thinking of the guy who comes and he goes like this, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
But that is how fast
6
SPEAKER_01
If you train yourself to get access, and I talk about monks, and I talk about Wim Hof, these people access the power they have within, and it takes practice and diligence.
6
SPEAKER_01
But the same processes are similar to hypnosis.
6
SPEAKER_01
And the placebo effect, and the interesting thing about the placebo effect
6
SPEAKER_01
is that you can even know it s a placebo, and it will still have the same effect.
6
SPEAKER_00
And it still gets results.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yes, yes.
6
SPEAKER_01
And also, if you think about exercising a particular muscle group, your muscles will increase without you doing anything.
6
SPEAKER_01
Wow, that s crazy.
6
SPEAKER_01
You see, but this is the power, because the brain doesn t know the difference between what you re thinking and reality, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
So if you embed it in there, now that s not to say your muscles are gonna get as big as an Olympic weightlifter, but they do increase in mass.
6
SPEAKER_01
And so getting access to these things within you that you don t appreciate is very, very powerful.
6
SPEAKER_01
And you talk about the flow state.
6
SPEAKER_01
This is a state of being where everything aligns, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
And that s where we wanna be.
6
SPEAKER_01
We re not paying attention to time.
6
SPEAKER_01
We re not paying attention to externalities.
6
SPEAKER_01
we re just doing it.
6
SPEAKER_01
Now, again, you don t want it to turn into, I ve ignored everything in my life to get to that goal, but you wanna live in a way in which things naturally come and you re living it and it s a process that s all working together for you to manifest your goals.
6
SPEAKER_00
Wow, that s beautiful.
6
SPEAKER_00
What is the most recent research about the placebo and how can we use that science or data to impact our lives positively?
6
SPEAKER_01
Well, again, the weird thing about it is you don t even have to believe it, and it will happen.
6
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
6
SPEAKER_01
Now, if you believe it s the real thing, it ll probably be more powerful.
6
SPEAKER_01
Even better, yeah, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
But again, it s embedding this belief into your head.
6
SPEAKER_01
And there s a six-week program in the book.
6
SPEAKER_01
it gives you a step-by-step way to do that.
6
SPEAKER_01
And again, it s not one and done.
6
SPEAKER_01
You have to do the work.
6
SPEAKER_01
You know, although I say the universe doesn t give a f*** about you, I also would say God only helps those who help themselves, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, when I make that statement, at the end of the book, basically my statement is, you are the universe, right?
6
SPEAKER_01
You are the power that decides.
6
SPEAKER_01
And again, it s understanding how much power you have within yourself.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, there s a, we re talking about people getting stuck in things.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, sometimes you cannot predict what s going to happen to you, but there s this attitude, it s called,
7
SPEAKER_00
dispositional optimism.
7
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if you recall reading that.
7
SPEAKER_00
But it s understanding that things don t work on our timeline.
7
SPEAKER_00
And having a constant state of an optimistic view of the world, again, that aligns you because it keeps you in this constant state of engagement of your parasympathetic nervous system.
7
SPEAKER_00
And again, if you can live in that state and look through the world through that lens,
7
SPEAKER_00
your physiology is going to be at its best, your longevity is going to be increased, you re going to be much happier in terms of purpose and meaning in your life.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, nothing, or at least I can t imagine nothing worse than, you know, being a crotchety old man still chasing 20 year old women, having three or four Ferraris.
7
SPEAKER_00
And actually it reminds me, I ll tell you a funny story.
7
SPEAKER_00
I was in Aspen giving a talk, and one of the benefactors was an 80-year-old fellow, a widower, who survived the Holocaust.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so he invites everyone up to his house.
7
SPEAKER_00
So, you know, you pull up to this huge mansion that s, you know, 20, 30 million.
7
SPEAKER_00
Right, in Aspen.
7
SPEAKER_00
In Aspen.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, one of his multiple.
7
SPEAKER_00
Sure.
7
SPEAKER_00
So I go in there, and, you know, I had been one of the main speakers,
7
SPEAKER_00
So he comes up to me and starts talking.
7
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, he looks at my watch and he says, see this?
7
SPEAKER_00
He points to his watch, million dollars.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, who cares?
7
SPEAKER_00
Who cares?
7
SPEAKER_00
And he says, come here.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I said, OK.
7
SPEAKER_00
So he takes me out to his garage.
7
SPEAKER_00
And again, tons of cars.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I m looking at him.
7
SPEAKER_00
And then he starts saying, you know, I ve I ve never been happy.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I said, okay.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he goes, you know, and he tells me about actually his tragic Holocaust experience and how he married this woman, but he was never in love or passionate, et cetera, et cetera.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he said, you know, I m miserable.
7
SPEAKER_00
I d do anything to be happy.
7
SPEAKER_00
Okay, and I said, okay.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he says, can you do anything for me?
7
SPEAKER_00
And I said, yeah, I can.
7
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I said, if you spend 10 hours with me, I will give you that gift.
7
SPEAKER_00
So he says, really?
7
SPEAKER_00
And I say, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
He says, well, how much will it cost?
7
SPEAKER_00
And I said, it ll cost $100,000 an hour.
7
SPEAKER_00
He looks at me and says, $500,000.
7
SPEAKER_00
An hour or total?
7
SPEAKER_00
No, total.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, it was half.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it was half.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I said, no, it doesn t work that way.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s a million dollars, and I m guaranteeing you, guaranteeing you,
7
SPEAKER_00
And so his daughter is there, and she overhears our talk.
7
SPEAKER_00
And she comes over and she says, Papa, this is like a neuroscientist.
7
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He studies this.
7
SPEAKER_00
You should do this.
7
SPEAKER_00
He looks at her and he says, foolish girl, you don t know anything about money.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he says, I have to save this money for you.
7
SPEAKER_00
And she looks at him and she goes, I have everything I need.
7
SPEAKER_00
I don t need anything.
7
SPEAKER_00
And she goes, do it.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he goes, no, no, no, you re foolish.
7
SPEAKER_00
And my point is, here was an opportunity for him to learn something, to get what he said he absolutely wanted, yet his own selfish self-interest and drive overpowered anything
7
SPEAKER_00
to actually give him what he wanted.
7
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
7
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
Well, he had a belief.
7
SPEAKER_01
He had an identity around what he thought he needed to hold on to, which was more money.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
But that was what always was making him happy or unhappy his whole life.
7
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
7
SPEAKER_01
But it gave him a sense of false security or status or influence or power or something.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, unfortunately though, there are people like that, but the reality is all the people around them are laughing at them.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and they are making the people around them more miserable probably.
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah, well, because they have to win, right?
7
SPEAKER_00
A million dollars.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s a one-up to everyone else.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and that s a very classic thing.
7
SPEAKER_00
In fact, I m not being critical of Warren Buffett,
7
SPEAKER_00
But, you know, I mean, there s a story that his wife wrote that said, you know, he was never interested in the money.
7
SPEAKER_00
He was interested in winning.
7
SPEAKER_01
The game.
7
SPEAKER_01
The game of winning.
7
SPEAKER_00
Right, right.
7
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, it s not always about winning sometimes.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s about caring for others, understanding people, being of service.
7
SPEAKER_00
Imagine somebody who has that degree of wealth, what he could have done to, let s say, fund an orphanage, or help the people who can t afford food in Aspen.
7
SPEAKER_00
And it would have been a minuscule amount.
7
SPEAKER_01
So small compared to what he actually had.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
7
SPEAKER_01
This idea of identity, we start to build our identity as children, and our teens, and our 20s.
7
SPEAKER_01
How do we start to identify what our identity actually is and how it is empowering us or disempowering us in this pursuit of manifesting?
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, the problem is, for many people, is that they have bonding and attachment issues that have been imprinted on them.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s ancient, anxious, or avoidant, attached, or...
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so they don t appreciate, you know, look, when you re growing up and, you know, seven or eight years old, you re not understanding this.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
7
SPEAKER_00
But these types of connections, you know, they get deeply embedded and you carry it with you.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so one is you have to make the effort to understand.
7
SPEAKER_00
As an example, I m sure some of the listeners go, oh, well, now I have a little idea because I keep choosing this jerk to be a partner with.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, why do I do that?
7
SPEAKER_00
And you have to sort of go backwards.
7
SPEAKER_00
And self-reflect.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, I was giving a talk one time, and there was a woman.
7
SPEAKER_00
She raised her hand.
7
SPEAKER_00
We were talking about this exact issue, and she started crying.
7
SPEAKER_00
And she said, my father, when I was a kid, told me I would be nothing.
7
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
7
SPEAKER_00
So sad.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s horrible.
7
SPEAKER_00
And this is what people need to understand.
7
SPEAKER_00
Words matter to children.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so the woman said, you know, my whole life I ve spent trying to be something.
7
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, she said, I became a nurse.
7
SPEAKER_00
I got a PhD.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, she s a senior executive at a hospital chain, right?
7
SPEAKER_00
She s doing extraordinarily well.
7
SPEAKER_00
And her whole life has been trying to overcome a baggage.
7
SPEAKER_00
And imagine the difference, though, if her father said, you know, you are amazing.
7
SPEAKER_00
You can do anything you want.
7
SPEAKER_00
I am so proud of you.
7
SPEAKER_00
I envision you doing incredible things.
7
SPEAKER_00
How the 30 years of her life or whatever?
7
SPEAKER_00
It s been 40 years Would have been one of love and connection and feeling worthy versus every day waking up being Repeating I was told I would be nothing Wow.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I guess there s a there s a question within that is I
7
SPEAKER_01
If you are given all the love and empowering affirmations and words from your parents that you can do and be what you want to be versus you don t have what it takes, you re never going to amount to anything, you disappoint me, you need to do better.
7
SPEAKER_01
Which one drives the person to create bigger or better results or impact?
7
SPEAKER_01
Because she has lived a life of impact but it s from a place of lack, right?
7
SPEAKER_01
Would she be as driven to grow and expand and reach beyond what she felt she was capable of if she had all the love in the world?
7
SPEAKER_01
I guess that s the question.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, of course, in that case, we can t specifically answer that.
7
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, there s no question that, you know, I used to have a coach when I was a rower crew.
7
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I used to have a coach who just scream at me all day.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s the worst.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s the worst.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, and it s exactly what we re talking.
7
SPEAKER_00
Did that make you strive and work harder?
7
SPEAKER_00
It just made you feel like the guy s a jerk, I hate the guy.
7
SPEAKER_00
I was living in fear too.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes, yes.
7
SPEAKER_00
Versus then I had a different coach.
7
SPEAKER_00
The new coach was an extraordinary human being.
7
SPEAKER_00
one you would model yourself after.
7
SPEAKER_00
He won the gold medal in the double skulls in Melbourne in 52, I think it was.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he was like, listen, you need to work on this, but I know when you do this, you re going to excel here.
7
SPEAKER_00
You re doing an amazing job.
7
SPEAKER_00
I can just tell you re really into this.
7
SPEAKER_00
I m so proud of you, right?
7
SPEAKER_01
It s more fun too.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, of course.
8
SPEAKER_01
So, can you get a similar result?
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but it s like somebody putting a backpack to keep stabbing you in the back your whole life saying, get going, get going, versus somebody who s hugging you and embracing you and telling you how much they love you.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yes, you can do incredible results from horribly mean people.
8
SPEAKER_01
But that s not a long-term strategy.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and it s not a healthy life.
8
SPEAKER_00
No.
8
SPEAKER_00
There s probably a lot of stress and anxiety and chronic pain that you re carrying with that energy, with that vibration, which you talk about in the book, the vibration.
8
SPEAKER_00
And when we can get into flow state, we re able to really create more abundance and in a harmonious way, not in a hard way of grinding constantly to accomplish and then feel exhausted when we get to the top.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and so then, you know, instead of having accomplished that and going, that son of a I showed you, you re sitting there, God, I m happy to have got it felt so good.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I, I m just so happy I was able to do this.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s a completely different way.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I would hope that people want the other way, where it s one of positivity and encouragement, not somebody driving you.
8
SPEAKER_01
And this is one of the problems in corporate America, right?
8
SPEAKER_01
You have
8
SPEAKER_01
bosses who think that creating fear motivates, and it does on some level, to a point.
8
SPEAKER_01
There s a great story about a fellow, what was his name?
8
SPEAKER_01
Carnes.
8
SPEAKER_01
I can t remember, I think it was Jeffrey Carnes.
8
SPEAKER_01
He was in Australia.
8
SPEAKER_01
But he gives an example, which is quite interesting.
8
SPEAKER_01
He said, we did a 360 review in our company.
8
SPEAKER_01
I m sure you re familiar with that, right?
8
SPEAKER_01
They checked out everybody.
8
SPEAKER_01
He said, you know, they came to me to share the results with me.
8
SPEAKER_01
He s telling us why.
8
SPEAKER_01
He said, they came to share the results with me.
8
SPEAKER_01
They told me in their entire history of doing this, I was the worst CEO they had ever met.
8
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
8
SPEAKER_01
And he said, they told me my employees fear me and that I was creating an environment that was unhealthy, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
8
SPEAKER_01
And he says this to his, so he said to his wife, he says to her, so what do you think of that?
8
SPEAKER_01
Can you believe that?
8
SPEAKER_01
I m thinking of firing them.
8
SPEAKER_01
And she goes, why would you do that?
8
SPEAKER_01
They re absolutely correct.
8
SPEAKER_01
And he goes, what?
8
SPEAKER_01
And she said, I have been telling you this for 20 years and you have not listened to me.
8
SPEAKER_01
said, you need to sit back and reflect on this.
8
SPEAKER_01
So he went through a two-year analysis with therapy and actually ended up meeting a Buddhist monk and got into a meditation practice.
8
SPEAKER_01
So they did a re-evaluation a few years later, and now they had one of the highest retention rates, one of the highest productivity rates, one of the highest shareholder values from
8
SPEAKER_01
leading to compassion, thoughtfulness, kindness as a motivator versus fear as a motivator.
8
SPEAKER_01
Wow, that s beautiful.
8
SPEAKER_00
One of the things, you know, you give this six-step process, and one of the things in step six, it s about releasing these expectations and being open to magic, being open to the wonders, the mysteries of the world, when things will come to you, maybe it s different than what you originally wanted, all these different things.
8
SPEAKER_00
Why is it important to manifest by not being attached to the results that you desire and being open to magic at the same time?
8
SPEAKER_01
You know, one of the challenges is that, and it gets back to attachment, because once you are attached to something, you have a vision of how it has to be.
8
SPEAKER_01
Right.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then that creates potential disappointment.
8
SPEAKER_01
And the nature of manifesting is it doesn t turn out exactly the way you want.
8
SPEAKER_01
Because what you may not appreciate is that there are other factors which are competing here.
8
SPEAKER_01
And sometimes you may not appreciate it, but on an unconscious level, the right decision is being made.
8
SPEAKER_01
On a conscious level, it s not what you thought it was, and therefore you resist it.
8
SPEAKER_01
And that creates unhappiness.
8
SPEAKER_01
The other thing is the same as having a timeline.
8
SPEAKER_01
Like, it has to happen by this day.
8
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t work that way.
8
SPEAKER_01
As an example, I have been planning a World Compassion Festival, which is a huge event, right, for 13 years.
8
SPEAKER_01
Do I, am I disappointed?
8
SPEAKER_01
No.
8
SPEAKER_00
It hasn t happened yet.
8
SPEAKER_01
It hasn t happened yet, but it will happen.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
8
SPEAKER_01
And this is also dispositional optimism.
8
SPEAKER_01
I have an absolute belief that that will happen.
8
SPEAKER_01
And in fact, I mentioned a little earlier, I was with Kailash Satyarthi, who s a Nobel Peace Laureate, yesterday.
8
SPEAKER_01
And we were talking about this world, Compassion Festival just came up.
8
SPEAKER_01
They said, well, why don t we join forces and make this happen?
8
SPEAKER_01
That s cool.
8
SPEAKER_01
Right?
8
SPEAKER_01
So it s a process, and it has not worked in any way the timeline I had imagined.
8
SPEAKER_01
But I m not disappointed or don t believe it s going to happen.
8
SPEAKER_01
Otherwise, I would sit there and go, I m a failure.
8
SPEAKER_01
You know, this should have happened 10 years ago.
8
SPEAKER_01
Why didn t it happen?
8
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s just like everything else I do, I m a loser, right?
8
SPEAKER_01
Versus saying, it will happen.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s sitting there.
8
SPEAKER_01
The things have not all come together to allow it to happen.
8
SPEAKER_01
And even if it doesn t happen the exact way I envision it, if it happens, it s an extraordinary thing.
8
SPEAKER_01
And so I think you have to look at it that way.
8
SPEAKER_01
Otherwise, you re creating unhappiness for yourself.
8
SPEAKER_01
And why do that?
8
SPEAKER_01
And again, life doesn t work that way.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s like, as an example, sitting there saying, I want to manifest this beautiful woman.
8
SPEAKER_01
She has these attributes, da, da, da.
8
SPEAKER_01
Then this exact, and your visual inducer has a blot.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then this dark-haired woman comes in who has every one of those things going, oh, get out of here.
8
SPEAKER_01
You re not a blot.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_01
So it doesn t always work the way you want.
8
SPEAKER_00
What would you say is something that we should think about or do first thing in the morning to set us up for a daily rhythm of manifesting?
8
SPEAKER_00
Is there a mantra, is there a process, is there a way of thinking, a way of feeling, a way of acting?
8
SPEAKER_00
Is there something we should believe right when we wake up or in the morning?
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, what I do may not work for everybody.
8
SPEAKER_01
And everybody has a different biology, they have a different way of seeing the world.
8
SPEAKER_01
Now, I ll tell you what I do to center me in the morning.
8
SPEAKER_01
And but it sets the stage to manifest.
8
SPEAKER_01
And what I mean by that is I was talking about having the mental state of being of service to others.
8
SPEAKER_01
Right.
8
SPEAKER_01
So my practice every morning
8
SPEAKER_01
is I wake up, and I say every morning, that s a lie, it is not every morning, it s most mornings.
8
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s funny, I don t know if you ever saw it, you know, Deepak Chopra s son did a movie about him.
8
SPEAKER_01
Gotham?
8
SPEAKER_01
Gotham Chopra, I know, yeah, yeah, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_01
And it showed him like, you know, that should be meditated, he goes and he s like.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I know Deepak, actually.
8
SPEAKER_01
But anyway, what I do is I sit up in bed,
8
SPEAKER_01
And I do a breathing exercise, because as you know, that will shift you over to engagement of your parasympathetic nervous system, which is the rest and digest mode.
8
SPEAKER_01
It makes you open.
8
SPEAKER_01
It makes you thoughtful.
8
SPEAKER_01
It makes you more creative.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then I think of the awe and joy in this world.
8
SPEAKER_01
And there s a great book about awe by Dacher Keltner.
8
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if you know Dacher.
8
SPEAKER_01
But yeah, so that sets the stage of seeing the world through this lens of this incredible awe of being in this world and the joy of being able to interact in this world.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then I go through a 10-letter mantra.
8
SPEAKER_01
And this actually developed when I was asked to, which was an incredible honor to me,
8
SPEAKER_01
by my medical school to give the white coat ceremony lecture to the incoming medical students.
8
SPEAKER_01
So imagine the guy who should never go to medical school giving this very prestigious lecture.
8
SPEAKER_01
But what I wanted to do was I wanted to inspire these students
8
SPEAKER_01
through something that was simple and easy to remember, but would center them in their lives going forward, not only as a doctor, but as a human being.
8
SPEAKER_01
So it was 10 letters of the alphabet.
8
SPEAKER_01
It was C, compassion for self and others, D, recognizing the dignity of every person,
8
SPEAKER_01
E, practicing equanimity, and this is this idea of evenness of temperament.
8
SPEAKER_01
You know, we were talking about chasing goals and having attachment.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s great to achieve a goal.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s great to have that high that you get when you achieve it.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s wonderful.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s amazing.
9
SPEAKER_00
But it s transitory.
9
SPEAKER_00
And you can t live at that state all the time.
9
SPEAKER_00
Conversely, having disappointments, having things fail, losing at things,
9
SPEAKER_00
as horrible and as painful as they are, they re also transitory.
9
SPEAKER_00
So having this evenness of temperament and not getting lost on the extremes is very, very important.
9
SPEAKER_00
Plus the other thing is if you reflect on it, what teaches you the most?
9
SPEAKER_00
It s not the highs, it s the disappointments, the challenges, the things you ve had to overcome, and that makes you who you are and creates resilience.
9
SPEAKER_00
And so somehow thinking you re going to avoid those, number one, it s not healthy, but that s where so much teaching comes from.
9
SPEAKER_00
The other, of course, is forgiveness.
9
SPEAKER_00
And we know that when you carry emotions attached to an event or to a person, every time you think of that event or that person, it negatively affects you.
9
SPEAKER_00
So when you re able to not carry that baggage and release it, and that s not to forget what somebody did to you or that, it s just to understand that carrying those memories is not healthy for you.
9
SPEAKER_00
then you re released again.
9
SPEAKER_00
And of course, one of the most powerful things, and I think it s really important, is having gratitude.
9
SPEAKER_00
And there s an immense amount of research that demonstrates having a gratitude journal, or in the evenings, writing three things that you are thankful for.
9
SPEAKER_00
Because what people forget is, in fact, probably everyone listening to this podcast, you don t appreciate that half of the world s population lives on less than $2.50 a day.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s horrible.
9
SPEAKER_00
And when you look at your life,
9
SPEAKER_00
You are actually blessed.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s funny, as a neurosurgeon, you know, I ve had situations where, let s say, somebody will have an accident and become paraplegic.
9
SPEAKER_00
And, of course, they say, this is horrible.
9
SPEAKER_00
My life is ruined.
9
SPEAKER_00
I say, look, I m going to take you in the room next door with the guy who s a ventilator-dependent quadriplegic.
9
SPEAKER_00
Can t move anything.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
9
SPEAKER_00
and is on a breathing tube and nothing.
9
SPEAKER_00
And then they say, oh, right?
9
SPEAKER_00
So.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s about perspective.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s about perspective.
9
SPEAKER_00
And this is the thing is you have the choice of the perspective you look at the world through.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
9
SPEAKER_00
Let s see, we were at gratitude, age, humility.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now, I will assure you for a neurosurgeon, humility is one of the challenges.
9
SPEAKER_01
You got to stay humble when you think you got, you know.
9
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
9
SPEAKER_00
Well, you know, being a neurosurgeon is still one of the professions in medicine that s still nominally highly respected.
9
SPEAKER_00
But anyway, humility, understanding you re no more important than anyone else.
9
SPEAKER_00
And I is integrity and values that bound your behavior.
9
SPEAKER_00
And if you want to call them rules to live by.
9
SPEAKER_00
J is a recognition of justice, meaning that we have a responsibility for caring for those who are vulnerable.
9
SPEAKER_00
K is simply being kind to others.
9
SPEAKER_00
It has nothing to do with suffering.
9
SPEAKER_00
Compassion has, by definition, a recognition of suffering with a motivational desire to alleviate that.
9
SPEAKER_00
So kindness is simply just being a good person.
9
SPEAKER_00
And, of course, what contains all of this, and that s love.
9
SPEAKER_01
That s great.
9
SPEAKER_00
So that was part of my lecture for the White Coat Ceremony.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s beautiful.
9
SPEAKER_00
And that s what I use every day of my own life.
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Now, I ll tell you an interesting story about that.
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I gave that lecture and a month or two later, and I think it was put on YouTube or something, but a month or two later, a woman reached out to me and she said, I heard that lecture, I read your book, which I talk about it in my first book.
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into the magic shop, and she said, I m the spiritual director of the largest homeless shelter in the United States.
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I m a person of faith.
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My friends had sent me all of the scripture, but I was burned out at my job, and I couldn t do it anymore, and I resigned.
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She said, I read your book.
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I heard that talk.
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It gave me the strength to return to work, which I m like, oh my God, that s beautiful, right?
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So then, a month later,
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She sends me another email and she says, you know, I have to tell you the story.
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I was telling my best friend about this and she has a daughter named Ginny.
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And Ginny is 12 and she makes beads.
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And Ginny made a set of 10 wooden beads that each one represents one of those letters of the alphabet.
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And she added a golden bead to represent the golden rule.
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Would you mind if we sold these to support the homeless shelter and we have a peace center there?
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And I said, absolutely.
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A few months later, she sends me another.
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She s like this stalker.
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She sends me another and she says, you know, this has been so powerful.
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I went ahead and I created a YouTube video.
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Can I post it?
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And it shows this little girl making these beads with beautiful music and she s talking about this practice.
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And she then posted that.
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And long story short, her and I became friends.
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I ended up going down to the homeless shelter and touring it and giving a talk in the church, or a sermon, as you will, even though I m not particularly religious.
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And then, she has two heroes in this world.
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One is the Dalai Lama, and the other is Desmond Tutu, when he was alive.
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And so, as I think you know, I used to be chairman of the Dalai Lama Foundation.
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He s the founding benefactor of the center I run at Stanford.
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I said, listen, I m hosting the Dalai Lama.
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I want to invite you to come, and I want to introduce you to him.
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Wow.
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And she s going, oh my god, that s incredible.
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She says, but you know, unfortunately, I make very little money, and I can t really afford it.
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I said, well, listen, I m going to hire you as a consultant.
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and bring a bunch of beads with you.
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And I did do that, and we had these beads blessed by His Holiness.
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And she got to meet her hero.
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So fast forward a few years later, I was friends with Tutu, so I was down in Cape Town at his 80th birthday party.
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So during his 85th, they invited me to come down again to his birthday.
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and I was in Oslo, and I called, I said, listen, you need to do me a favor.
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I said, I want you to go to Cape Town in my place.
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Wow, wow.
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And meet Tutu.
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And while on the one hand, obviously, it cost something to do that, in the big scope of my world, that was irrelevant.
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My, right.
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But for her?
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It was the world.
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Exactly.
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Wow.
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That epitomizes what every one of us can do.
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To simply do a simple act, and it can be saying hello, it can be holding a door open, it can be sitting with somebody, it can be buying a homeless person a meal.
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And the thing is, the benefit you get from this is so, so powerful.
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His holiness says, if you want to make others happy, be compassionate.
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If you want to be happy, be compassionate.
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If you want to make others happy, be compassionate.
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If you want to be happy, be compassionate.
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Yeah, because we know when you care, when you re compassionate, it has a very positive effect on your physiology because you get shifted over to engagement of your parasympathetic nervous system.
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Your cardiac function s improved.
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Your peripheral vascular function s improved.
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The expression of inflammatory proteins is diminished.
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Your immune system s boosted.
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Your cortisol levels are decreased.
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And so there s a whole cascade of events.
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And plus, when you re kind and compassionate, your reward and pleasure centers are stimulated.
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Wow.
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You know, who wouldn t want to be that way?
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And that s what, you know, people forget sometimes.
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Wow.
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And most people forget to be compassionate towards themselves the most.
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Well, and that s the key of what we re talking about.
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Absolutely.
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Mind Magic, the Neuroscience of Manifestation and How It Changes Everything.
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This is extremely powerful.
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I want everyone to get a copy of this book.
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Get one for a friend as well.
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I ve got a couple final questions for you James before we wrap up, but before I ask them Where can we send people to do you have a website?
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We should send people to or just go on Amazon and get the book
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I think there are many places besides Amazon where you can get books.
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Certainly, I m a proponent of supporting independent bookstores, but it is on Amazon.
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You can also purchase it from Penguin Random House, if you use my name and the book title.
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But it s pretty much anywhere which can be sold.
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And do you have a website as well where we can stay in touch with you or connect?
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Yeah, it s jamesrdotymd.com.
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All of my work is there.
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The other book I mentioned briefly was Into the Magic Shop, which was a New York Times bestseller.
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It s in 36 languages.
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Also, the center I run at Stanford is there, and certainly people can go there.
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And we offer courses on self-compassion and compassion, as well as even corporate programs and programs for first responders, police officers, and things like that.
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That s very cool.
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And that s at ccare.stanford.edu.
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And actually, another project that I m actually very excited about is, for the last couple of years, I ve been working on creating a mental health app.
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And because so many people are suffering from stress, anxiety, and lack of self-compassion.
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And the interesting thing about it is because, especially adolescents, so many are suffering that
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There are not even enough therapists to take care of all these people.
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But the reality is most people are suffering from just living in the modern world.
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It s not drug-resistant depression, it s just the stress and anxiety of living in the modern world, because as we re talking about with the blue zones, we re far different in the modern world.
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So what it does is it utilizes an emotion assessment engine to analyze facial expression, voice analysis, and context of speech, connected to a conversational AI knowledge base of compassion, focus, therapy, and psychology, which is then hooked up to a human avatar who talks to you.
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Wow, that s cool.
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And what we know is that having brief conversations, like 10 minutes,
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when somebody is feeling stressed and anxious, the very nature of a conversation can significantly decrease those feelings.
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And what s interesting is so many people are afraid of being judged.
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They feel ashamed, yes.
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So being able to talk actually to an avatar who is compassionate, empathetic, non-judgmental, accepting,
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is very powerful.
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Now, this isn t to separate you from people.
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What it is, is to support you so that you can go forward and actually have better connections.
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And it s available 24-7, unlike your therapist, which as you know, I should say, I don t know, maybe you don t have a therapist, but most people have a therapist.
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But you call after five o clock and they go,
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If this is a life-changing emergency, please call 911.
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Well, if you re stressed and anxious, that s really not the thing you want to hear.
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But anyway, that company is called Happy, H-A-P-P-I dot A-I.
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And I m very excited about that.
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That s cool.
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When s that coming out?
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Actually, people can sign up now for free.
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We re letting people use it just to get input from them.
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And certainly, if people try it, please drop me a note.
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That s cool.
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Because we re trying to, of course, improve it.
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But it s pretty amazing the type of conversations you can have.
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I mean, I ve been like, wow.
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That s cool.
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That s amazing.
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That s cool.
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Happy, H-A-P-P-I dot A-I.
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Check that out as well.
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A couple of final questions for you, James.
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One of them is called the three truths question.
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It s a hypothetical scenario.
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Imagine you get to live as long as you want and you get to keep creating and manifesting and serving humanity the way you want to do it.
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And everything that you desire, you manifest.
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until the day you die.
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But for whatever reason, on the last day in this world, you have to take all of your work with you.
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This book we don t have access to, this conversation is no longer around, everything you ve created, it s for whatever reason gone somewhere else.
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We don t have access.
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It s a hypothetical scenario and question, but if it was the last day many years away, and you could only leave behind three lessons to the world, and this is all we have of your information, your content, what would those three truths be for you that you would share?
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Believe in yourself.
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Care for others.
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Be kind to yourself.
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Before I ask the final question, James, I want to acknowledge you for the consistent contribution you make on the world.
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I think this topic is extremely interesting for so many people, because a lot of people are suffering, and they want to have a better life, but they don t know how to create the life.
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So bringing neuroscience research and your own practical lessons into this work, sharing it here for people for free, creating it in a book people can follow the program,
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And everything else you re sharing with the world, I just really acknowledge you for the contribution you are making currently on humanity.
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And I m grateful for the wisdom and the lessons that you share.
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So I wanted to share that with you.
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Well, thank you.
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I appreciate that.
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That s very kind.
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You re welcome.
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Yeah, you re welcome.
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And my final question for you, James, is what is your definition of greatness?
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Being authentic, understanding yourself, and caring for others.
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There you go.
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Mind magic.
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Thank you, James.
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Appreciate it.
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I hope today s episode inspired you on your journey towards greatness.
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Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a rundown of today s show with all the important links.
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And if no one has told you today, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter.
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And now it s time to go out there and do something great.