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Coming up next on passion struck, I m very guilty of like saying like, oh, I can t do that.
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I m not good enough.
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I m not good at that.
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But if you just take the word yet and you tie it on to any sentence and you say,
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I m not good at that yet.
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All of a sudden, you give yourself a little bit more like, I can do it, a little bit more courage.
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I m not good at that yet, because maybe you re not good at it.
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But you absolutely can get good at it.
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You absolutely can.
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And if you look backwards for proof that you are good at learning and implementing and sticking with the commitments that you make with yourself, and you have done really awesome things in your life, then you can always bring that part of you back.
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Welcome to Passion Struck.
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Hi, I m your host, Jon R. Miles, and on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world s most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you.
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Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself.
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If you re new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays.
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We have long-form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes.
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Now, let s go out there and become Passion Struck.
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Hello everyone, and welcome back to episode 401 of Passion Struck.
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Consistently ranked by Apple as the number one alternative health podcast.
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And thank you to all of you who come back to the show every week to listen and learn how to live better, be better, and impact the world.
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I have a special invitation for you.
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I m excited to introduce our new Passion Struck quiz.
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It s a unique opportunity for you to discover where you stand on the Passion Struck continuum.
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Are you an orchestrator, masterfully balancing various aspects of life with passion and purpose?
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Or are you a vanquisher?
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conquering challenges and turning obstacles into opportunities.
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Take the quiz on passionstruck.com and find out which one resonates more with your journey to living a passionstruck life.
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If you re new to the show, thank you so much for being here, or you simply want to introduce this to a friend or a family member, and we so appreciate it when you do that.
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We have episode starter packs, which are collections of our fans  favorite episodes that we organize in a convenient playlist.
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They give any new listener a great way to get acclimated to everything we do here on the show.
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Either go to Spotify or
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In case you missed it last week, I had three great interviews.
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The first covered the incredible story of Jen Drummond, who set a world record of becoming the first female to climb the seven second summits.
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Jen is the author of the new book, Breakproof, Seven Strategies to Build Resilience and Achieve Your Life Goals.
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I also did a bonus interview with Dr. Scott Rick, an associate professor of marketing at the University of Michigan s Ross School of Business.
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Our interview focused on understanding the emotional causes and consequences of consumer financial decision-making, with a particular interest in the behavior of tight wads and spend thrifts.
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Lastly, I interviewed Maria Menounos.
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Maria is a renowned television personality, actress, New York Times bestselling author, and journalist.
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She has a deeply moving personal story of resilience, caregiving, and self-advocacy that we discuss.
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And if you like any of those three previous episodes or today s, we would so appreciate you giving it a five star rating and review.
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They go such a long way in strengthening the Passion Star community where we can help more people to create intentional life.
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And I know we and our guests love to hear your feedback.
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Throughout the month of January, as we near the launch,
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of my book, Passion Struck, I m going to feature guests who signify what it truly means to live a passion-struck life.
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Today, I m honored to welcome Jen Gottlieb, a towering figure in the realm of personal branding and authentic communication.
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Jen, with her illustrious background as a VH1 host, Broadway actress, and co-founder of Super Connector Media, brings a rich tapestry of experiences to the table.
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Her best-selling book, Be Seen, is not just a title, it s a manifesto for those seeking to make a genuine impact in their field.
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Our focus in our interview is a critical yet often underplayed element of success, a power of authentic presence in both life and business.
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For those yearning to make a real impact and forge lasting connections, this episode is a treasure trove of wisdom.
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You ve got the ingredients for success, a stellar product, efficient processes and dynamic marketing, but the secret sauce, that genuine heartfelt connection.
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with your audience.
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Authenticity isn t just an add-on, it s the core of a thriving brand, and today you re in for a masterclass in making that core stronger and more vibrant.
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In this episode, Jen will share insights that go beyond conventional branding strategies.
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You ll learn how to authentically show up for your clients and audience, creating a brand that resonates and endures.
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It s not just about the mechanics of business, it s about building a narrative that speaks to the heart of your audience.
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A narrative where your authenticity is the protagonist.
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Jen s authority in this domain comes from her own journey, which she candidly shares, offering strategies and lessons that are both relatable and actionable.
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From harnessing your unique story to engaging with your audience on a deeper level, Jen s guidance is a blend of personal antidotes and professional strategies.
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Expect to walk away from this episode with a clearer understanding of how to authentically present yourself and your brand.
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Jen s advice will help you not just in being visible, but in being impactful, memorable, and genuinely connected to those you serve.
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So whether you re a budding entrepreneur, a seasoned business owner, or someone looking to elevate their personal brand, tune in for an enlightening session.
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Let s discover how to be seen, be heard, and make a lasting impression on the world.
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Thank you for choosing PassionStruck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life.
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Now, let that journey begin.
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I am absolutely honored and thrilled to have Jen Gottlieb on Passion Struck.
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I have wanted to have you so long.
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Welcome.
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So excited to be here, John.
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Thank you for having me.
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I was introduced to you by a mutual friend, Dr. Gabrielle Lyon, whom you know really well and we both know is a rock star.
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How did you originally meet Gabby?
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People have been asking me this lately a lot, and I can t even remember the exact moment we met.
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I had been following Dr. Gabrielle years before she was my friend, just following her, listening to her on podcasts, consuming her content, and doing all of the things that she would talk about.
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And as a woman, doing the things that, back in the day, that Gabrielle was talking about was not what all of my friends were doing.
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I was eating lots of protein and lifting heavy weights, and it transformed my life and my body completely.
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And so I was a fan of hers and I can t tell you when the moment was that we actually met because it was probably a lot of different times and social media and connecting and chatting online and chatting back and forth between comments and then officially seeing each other at some point in time.
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It was one of those relationships where
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I don t know if you ve ever had this happen to you.
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The second that we connected, really, we were like, wow, we are sisters from another time.
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We just felt so deeply connected immediately.
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And I ve never had this happen before, but we became best friends.
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I call her my best friend.
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And we had just connected recently, like this last year, and she is one of the closest people in the world to me.
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So
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This is a really great example of how somebody that you follow online.
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Cause I know she was following me and I was following her.
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You can actually really create a real relationship with, because you learn so much about them from them, putting out content.
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And then when you connect it s fireworks, we became immediate besties.
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Yeah.
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I can relate to that completely.
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I know Gabby s husband s a seal and I know a lot of them because I m a veteran, but there was this one that I kept seeing pop up and they do this big event every year here in Tampa, where I live called the frog man swim, which is.
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to help give money back to the fallen from that SEAL community.
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And I happened to meet him at this event and to me, he was larger than life, but we met and hit it off.
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And it turns out he lived less than a half a mile away from me.
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And so we ve become really great friends.
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So it s amazing when things like that happen.
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So speaking of people I have always wanted to meet,
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One of them happens to be Britney Spears because I think she s such an interesting woman.
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And I understand you have an interesting story about impersonating her.
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Can you tell us about it?
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Yes.
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For those of you that are listening that have no idea who I am or anything about my story, I just have to take that everybody back a second.
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and share that I was on this TV show on VH1 about heavy metal music for five years.
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Many people used to know me as this heavy metal girl.
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And spoiler alert for anyone listening right now and even probably for you, John, I don t really like heavy metal music.
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I never did.
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I was an actress and I was auditioning to get gigs like every other actress in New York City does.
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And I came across an audition for a TV show on VH1.
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I thought it was a great opportunity.
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And they said you had to be a sexy rock and roll girl.
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So I went in there to play the part of the sexy rock and roll girl.
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And I end up getting this show that ended up changing the trajectory of my life forever for good.
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And of course, I wouldn t even say for bad, but for major learning experiences.
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But the way that I got this role was very ironic, because the day that I found out about this audition, I was like, you know what, I could probably play this part of a heavy metal rocker chick, even though I don t know anything about metal.
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Because I was in this, I was in the Broadway national tour of The Wedding Singer, which the Adam Sandler movie, The Wedding Singer.
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And I played the role of Linda, which is the ex-girlfriend that Robbie Hart, the lead character, has that leaves him at the altar.
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And the character was very much a rock and roll girl.
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So I had played that role for so long.
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So I was like, I could do this.
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I could go into this audition and rock it.
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I just have to study.
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So the night before the audition, I spent the entire night Googling metal music.
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I m like, I m going to memorize all these bands and all these singers.
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And I m going to pretend that I know everything about this so that I go into this audition and I am the most metal chick they ve ever met.
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And I m like up all night studying.
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I go into
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the audition and they start asking me all these questions like what s your favorite band and I m like forgetting everything because when you don t really believe something it doesn t innately come out of you so I had only been up that one night researching and I m like I like Poison and Guns N  Roses and I m like guessing all of these bands I m like I was totally bombing this audition at this point after they re done asking me about metal in my mind I m like I didn t get this
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Forget it.
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I did not get this role.
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And then they say to me, they re like, Jen, oh, I noticed on your resume that you do a great Britney Spears impersonation.
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And I had totally forgotten that I left that on the bottom of my acting resume.
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Because usually on your acting resume, you ll put something fun and funny at the bottom.
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And I was like, that does not help with this audition to be a heavy metal girl.
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Forget it.
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I totally bombed.
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I did not get this part.
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And I was like, yeah, I do.
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I just took the mask down.
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I stopped trying to be heavy metal girl.
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And I was like, yeah, I do.
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And I just immediately turned into real Jen, who I really was, because I was like, screw it.
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I didn t get it anyway.
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And they re like, can we see it?
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Could you do your Britney?
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I m like, sure.
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And I sang like Britney Spears, and everybody in the room is laughing hysterically.
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They think it s the funniest thing in the world.
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And I leave, I m like, I didn t get that.
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Because I like walk out into the waiting room, and there s all these real metal girls.
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Girls with little leg tattoos, and they look so cool.
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And they really like metal music.
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I m like, I just sang like Britney Spears.
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There s no way in hell I m going to get this part.
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And two weeks later, they call me, and they re like, Jen, we want to invite you to be part of that metal show.
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That s the name of the show, That Metal Show.
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I m like, you do?
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They re like, yeah, honestly, your Britney Spears impersonation was so spot on and hilarious.
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And we just thought we would have so much fun with you.
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So we want to invite you to join the show.
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And I got the part.
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And this was the biggest reminder to me that I had to learn again and again after this, by the way, because even though I learned it then, it didn t really sink in.
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But that whenever you re your most authentic self, whenever you just are your truth and you are who you are, usually people lean in the
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So it wasn t until I broke down, and I wasn t heavy metal girl, and I was just me doing my silly Britney Spears impersonation.
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That was what got me this job, ironically, which was an important lesson to learn at that time.
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And I always go back to it now.
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I m like, Jen, what s your Britney Spears right now?
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How can you bring more real Jen to the table?
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I love it, and I used to do an impersonation of Jack Nicholas, and I did one from him in The Shining, and unfortunately sent a video of this to a buddy of mine who s been holding it on as ransom ever since.
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Jack Nicholson, you mean?
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Jack Nicholson.
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Oh, who I said Nicholson.
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Jack Nicholson.
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Yeah, I get it.
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Yeah, and then he said The Shining, and I was like, I think I get it.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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So I get it.
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Well, we re going to be talking a lot about your book, Be Seen, which the viewers can see right behind your shoulders.
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But before we touched on that, I wanted to go just a step further into your career as an actor.
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because I heard you say in another interview with Amy Porterfield that while you were an actor, you got to hide behind the mask of the character that you were playing.
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And to me, it really resonated because I think so many people today are living behind what I call a mask of pretense and we re hiding who we truly are because we re trying to conform to so many things that we think we re supposed to be.
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What did you learn about yourself
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and that impact that the mask was having on you when you weren t showing up authentically?
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For me, the more that I hid behind this big mask that I was wearing, specifically when I was on the heavy metal show, the more I was in an internal battle with myself because I knew who I was.
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We know who we are at our core, Lili, and when we re out of alignment with that,
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And we re living, I was basically living in fear, right?
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Fear of people not liking me for who I really was, fear of people not accepting me, fear of not getting a job, fear of not working, fear of not being good enough, not pretty enough, not anything enough.
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So I was like, okay, well, as long as I can pretend to be whoever I need to be for you, then I m protecting my real self from being vulnerable and being rejected or all of those things that I was afraid of.
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But deep down, every time I showed up as a version of me that wasn t in alignment with who I really was at my core, the girl who impersonates Britney Spears or that little girl that I was when I was five, running around my living room, singing and dancing and doing backflips and just being silly and letting my belly hang out and having the messiest hair and singing Annie and the Little Mermaid, like that s who I was.
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But every time I showed up as not being real me, I would feel this like,
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Number one, an exhaustion.
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It s very exhausting to be someone that you re not.
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Because you have to keep up with the lie.
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You have to keep up with the presentation.
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And it s not authentic to who you are, so it s not easy.
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It feels hard.
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And a lot of the time when people tell me that they re very burnt out from being on all the time, I m like, then are you really being you?
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because I know what that feels like.
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I felt burnt out all the time.
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I was presenting something that I wasn t.
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So I was trying so, so hard every single day to keep up with this thing.
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And inside I was like, Jen, that s not you.
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That s not you.
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And I was fighting with myself.
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No, you have to keep this up because you have to.
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Be a good girl.
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You have to be a good actress.
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You have to do all the things that you re expected to do.
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This is better than what would happen if you didn t do it.
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Right.
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All of the fear of the unknown always got to me as well.
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And then there was also this voice inside of me that was saying to me, like, Jen, what s going to happen when all this goes away?
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What s going to happen when the show gets canceled?
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Then what are you going to do?
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What s going to happen when this job ends and you have to find another job and you have to keep being somebody that you need to be for everybody else?
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And it got really dark because it s just a really rocky place to be in.
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I can t even find the words right now to describe the way that I felt.
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It was just not solid.
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I just felt like I was floating everywhere and being everything that everybody else wanted me to be.
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And it was so unbelievably exhausting and then terrifying because you re always wondering, Oh my God, are they going to find out that this isn t really who I am?
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And when you re out of alignment.
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It often, and you can t get back into alignment on your own.
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It often happens on its own.
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I believe that God or the universe, whatever you believe in steps in.
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It s just like, you know what?
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This is not working.
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So I m just going to blow this up and I m going to force you to find out who you really are.
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And that s what happened to me.
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Everything pretty much blew up.
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The show got canceled as I always knew that it would eventually one day, but I never prepared for it.
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The guy that I was dating that was totally not right for me.
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And I knew in my gut, but I stayed because I was afraid.
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Another part of that out of alignment situation that I was in.
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but he left me for one of our friends and totally dumped me and left me.
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And then I was single and I had been very depressed during that time.
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So I spent the majority of my money.
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I wasn t saving.
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I was partying a lot.
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I was lost.
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And I pretty much had to start over.
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And I found myself in this tiny little room in this apartment with six other actors that lived there.
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And I had this window that faced a brick wall and I had nothing.
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I had no relationship.
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I had no job.
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I had no idea who the hell I was anymore.
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And I didn t know what I wanted to do with my life.
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And I,
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I knew what my passion was.
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I knew I loved performing, but I didn t know if that was the purpose.
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I didn t know how to do that without losing myself again.
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And so I couldn t have been more stuck and lost.
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And when we started this conversation, you said a lot of people that are listening to this feel very stuck.
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And I can relate to that so much because I had never felt so stuck in my life.
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I was like, what do I do from here?
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Yeah.
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And I want to just,
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go in on that a little bit more because I think a lot of people are feeling this way and we re stuck for a variety of different reasons.
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But I think some of the biggest ones are fear and self-doubt.
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It s something that you talk about a lot in the book.
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But when you were at that lowest level, when you didn t know what to do, I think so many people get paralyzed because they try to overthink or
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maybe believe that the action that they need to take is life altering, or it s this huge, gigantic step, when I really believe it s just the tiny choices, the tiny habits we build, the micro choices that really get us started in a different direction.
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For you, what was it that allowed you to make that change?
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Yeah, it was literally one second at a time, one moment at a time, one action step at a time.
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If you were to ask me to sit there and think about it and get clear on it and then create a plan, it would have never been the trajectory that I ended up going on, which was the best ever for me.
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I would have never found this path or what I m doing right now if I would have just sat around and thought about it and planned it out and mapped it out perfectly.
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And I think that s a big mistake that a lot of people make.
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They re like, I can t take action until I have the perfect plan in place.
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I had no idea what the hell I was doing.
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I just tried stuff.
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I just really tapped in.
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I was like, what am I good at?
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What do I know that like is a superpower of mine?
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And what have I always wanted to do?
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And what if I just went and tried it?
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And I just at one day at a time went and started trying things.
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And I remember I was at my darkest moment right after that happened.
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And I was in a really deep depression and my mom had to come into the city.
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My mom lived outside of New York in Long Island and I lived in Manhattan and she came in and she s like, I gotta help you.
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What s going on?
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And she gave me this book.
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My mom was very into personal development at the time, and I wasn t.
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And I was, like, not open to anything personal development.
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I was very much the opposite of what
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I am now.
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And she gave me this book called You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay.
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And it s a book full of affirmation.
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And I didn t know what an affirmation was, nor did I want to say any affirmations, nor did I believe in the power of affirmation.
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And my mom knew that.
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My mom s very intuitive, especially with me.
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And inside the book, I opened it when I got home,
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and she had photocopied one of the affirmations for me because she knew I wasn t going to open the book.
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And on the back of the affirmation that she photocopied, she wrote me a letter.
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And essentially it said, Jenny, I hope you find yourself again.
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And I said to myself on that day, I was like, all right, I m not going to read this book.
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I m not, I m just going to take this affirmation.
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I m going to put it on my refrigerator and I ll just read this every day, no matter what, no matter if I believe it or not, I don t care.
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I m just going to read the stupid thing.
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I don t know if it was the affirmation that changed anything in my brain, but I do believe that it was one action step that I took every day that created a little bit of momentum for me.
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It gave me a little win, just getting up every day and reading it.
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Just the act of that, of committing to myself that I was going to do something and following through, getting up, reading the affirmation.
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That alone, setting that commitment with myself and winning on the other side, then, okay, I did it.
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I don t feel that much better, but I did it.
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Okay.
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That got me to maybe taking that next little step and getting outside of my apartment and like going to the gym and figuring out now, maybe I want to be a personal trainer and networking at the gym and getting a personal training job.
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And maybe, and then that little win got me to starting to dive into personal development a little bit more and going to Barnes and Noble and reading all these books and listening to podcasts.
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It was one step at a time.
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It wasn t like I figured it all out and went, it was like one little tiny action step.
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And the crazy thing about this whole story
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You really want to connect the dots looking backwards.
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This is wild.
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You Can Heal Your Life was written by a woman named Louise Hay.
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And she s an author that wrote a bunch of personal development books.
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She eventually created a publishing house called Hay House.
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And it s one of the biggest publishing houses for personal development books in the world now.
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And this book behind me, when I wanted to get a major publisher for it, I was working with my agent, pitching it to a lot of publishers.
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One of the publishers that we had on our list was Hay House.
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And I was able to get on a call with this team and explain how Louise Hay essentially changed my life, or she was the stepping stone.
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And that s why this book is here.
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And Hay House published my book.
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You never know how the dots are going to connect when you look backwards.
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And I always love telling that story because it was such a, just a beautiful reminder that you might not know where the journey is going to take you, but if you can just get that little win that day, that little tiny little bit of belief or that little action step, that s going to create that little boost of momentum that might lead you down a different path, or it might lead you to take another action step that makes you believe a little bit more.
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And that might lead you to a different.
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It s something different that you never would have imagined.
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You re never going to get there if you just sit around and think about it, because we can t even imagine what it could possibly turn into.
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But you can t think your way there.
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You can act your way.
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You can do your way there.
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And that s essentially what I did.
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Well, thank you for that, because I think people think that it s going to be so difficult for them to pull themselves out of where they re at.
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And I was recently talking to Hal Elrod.
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And I was talking to him about how I implemented the miracle morning.
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And one of the most crucial steps for me was the gratitude practice.
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And it s literally in the first five minutes when I wake up, something that I do every day, because if I m going to live a day, I want to live it at excellence.
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But I use that as a chance to give myself gratitude for what I ve accomplished, but to look forward and ensure that I m intentionally setting up the day I want to live it.
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So I think that s such an important point.
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We re going to talk about rejection a little bit later, but for me, when I was trying to get my book deal, Hay House was the publisher I wanted as well.
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And unfortunately, I didn t even get a call from him, but Wayne Buyer has really influenced my life and is very tied to that company as well.
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And so is the person who did your forward.
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I just got finished reading Gabby Bernstein s latest book, Happy Days.
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And one of the things I love about her book is how vulnerable she is.
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And she really talks about self-worth.
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And for her, she didn t feel that self-worth.
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She didn t have that self-love.
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And so it was leading her to a bunch of destructive patterns.
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How closely tied is our self-worth to our authenticity?
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I can t, I m not an expert on self-worth at all, or even trauma or any of those things.
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Gabby s book changed my life.
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Happy days.
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I thought it was phenomenal.
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But for me, I always like to just put it in a viewpoint of my experience, my self-worth.
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I never, if you don t believe that you re worthy of something and you re constantly telling yourself that you re not worthy of it, or you can t do it, or it s going to be hard, then that s going to be a reality.
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We can t necessarily change the things that are happening.
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Unfortunately, life gets really lifey and shit hits the fan sometimes and things happen and that can.
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knock down our beliefs.
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It can, and it can make us feel like we re not worthy and it can make us feel like crap.
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However, what do we want our relationship with that to be?
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My therapist always asks me, all right, we can t necessarily control what just happened.
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Okay.
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We can t control that right now.
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You feel like shit about this specific situation, but what do you want your relationship with this all to be?
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What do you want your perspective of this to be?
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Because you can decide if it s really hard and you re not worthy of moving through this and you re not good enough to move through this, or you can decide,
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that you are a powerhouse and you can look back and think about all of the times in your life when you ve moved through every difficult situation, no matter how hard it was, and you came out okay on the other side.
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And you can go into the situation with a relationship of, you know what, bring it on.
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I m going to invite every single moment into my life that s crappy because I know that it s teaching me something.
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I don t want it, but I m going to invite it in if it happens.
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And I m going to allow myself to have a relationship with it.
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That s one of, I believe in myself.
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I believe that I can move through this and I believe that I have what it takes.
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And I think that is a combination of really looking back and celebrating what you ve done in your life.
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That s why I write about the badass list in chapter four.
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It s so unbelievably important.
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remembering what we re capable of, remembering the amazing things that we ve done in our life, just to remind ourselves how wonderful we are.
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Because sometimes we forget what we spend a lot of time on the internet, comparing ourselves to other people.
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And our self-worth can get bashed down a couple of knots.
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But we get to decide, what do I want my perspective of this to be?
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What do I want my relationship with this situation to be?
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And do I believe that I m capable of moving through it?
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And if you look for proof in your past, you ll usually find it.
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And if you, I also am playing a lot with, with the word yet.
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I love this concept.
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I ve been using it a lot lately because I m very guilty of saying, Oh, I can t do that.
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I m not good enough at, I m not good at that.
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But if you just take the word yet and you tie it onto any sentence and you say, I m not good at that yet.
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All of a sudden you give yourself a little bit more, like you can do it a little bit more courage.
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I m not good at that yet.
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Good at it.
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But you absolutely can get good at it.
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You absolutely can.
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And if you look backwards for proof that you are good at learning and implementing and sticking with the commitments that you make with yourself, and you have done really awesome things in your life, then you can always bring that part of you back.
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And you can always implement into, listen, I m not a morning person yet.
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I am now, but I used to say I m not a morning person, but if I wouldn t just, and I would just remove that even today, I just moved to Florida from New York, literally last week.
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And I always had this limiting belief, and I don t know if this is a self-worth thing, or I don t know where it comes from, but I had this limiting belief in my mind that I could never live anywhere other than New York City.
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I had tied my identity to New York.
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I was like, I am a New Yorker through and through.
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I will never leave New York.
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And how many times a day do we do this?
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Do we tie our identity to something?
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And we say we could never do something, or we could only do this, or it will only work this way for us, this way.
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I do that all the time.
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And I proved myself so wrong, because I said I could never move out of New York City, and I forced myself to do it, and now I m here, and I ve evolved into a completely different version of whoever I thought I could be, because I m like, oh my God, I love Florida.
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I proved my limiting belief wrong.
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And now I m like, what else could I prove wrong to myself?
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What other limiting beliefs do I have?
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What other things am I saying to myself that are just
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So not true.
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What other ways am I just devaluing myself every day because I m not even giving myself the opportunity to say yet?
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What if you just said yet?
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I m not a person that could live in Florida yet, but maybe.
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What if we added a little bit more maybe to our life?
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And what if we just got a little bit more curious and asked ourselves, what do I want my relationship with this limiting belief to be?
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Do I want it to be like, you know what, bring it on, let s go.
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I understand that this is something that maybe was planted in me from trauma when I was a kid, some kind of situation that happened in my life.
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But what if, just maybe, I could take one little different action step today and I could prove this wrong.
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And I could prove to myself that I m something so much more than I ever believed to be true.
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I love what you re saying.
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I lived in Austin, Texas prior to moving to Florida.
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I thought when I was there, there s no way I could ever leave Austin.
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Nothing is ever going to be as great as this.
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Then I moved to St.
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Petersburg,
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Florida, which was Austin 15 years ago.
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People like to say it s becoming it more and more, but decade plus later, I don t look back with any regrets.
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I ve loved every minute that I ve been here.
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And I hope you love South Florida as well.
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I saw one of your posts with a
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palm tree in the back in the beach and I m like, she now sees it and she gets to experience it.
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I remember getting back to your done list.
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I interviewed, when I just started this podcast out, an Australian influencer named Trav Bell, who goes by the bucket list guy.
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I love his website.
3
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And I was asking him about the bucket list, and I said, what is the most profound teaching that you do?
3
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And he said, it s my advice around the reverse bucket list, because so many people focus on the bucket list
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and they don t put enough emphasis on the reverse bucket list.
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And the reverse bucket list are all those things that used to be on the bucket list that we ve already accomplished throughout our life that we don t revisit, reflect upon, and give ourselves credit for.
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And I think it weaves really nicely into the I ve done list.
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Yes.
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When we do that, how does reflecting on what we ve accomplished contribute to our personal growth?
3
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Well, for me, I created this badass list by accident, just trying to help a friend because she was experiencing imposter syndrome in a really big way.
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And I will never forget this moment.
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We were on the phone.
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She was my accountability buddy in life and business.
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And we would just get on the phone every single week and hold each other accountable to our goals.
3
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And she was going to launch this course.
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And I had always looked at this girl as like such a rock star.
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She was so on top of it.
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She was such an amazing coach.
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She had built this whole beautiful online business and she was so much further along than I ever was.
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And I always looked at her in awe.
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She could do anything.
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And she was so impressive to me.
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And here she was on the call with me on the phone crying.
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and so worried about launching this product that she was launching for the first time.
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And she was like, I don t think I can charge this much money.
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I can t do it.
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I m going to pull the plug.
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I don t want to do this.
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It s going to fail.
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And just freaking herself out and really going into the depths of imposter syndrome.
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I m just not good enough talking about self-worth.
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There was none there for her in that moment.
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And I m not looking at her thinking about her in my mind, talking to her.
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And I m like, this is impossible.
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I think you are such a badass.
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you are incredible.
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I don t think you see yourself the way that I see you.
3
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So I said to her, I was like, Tori, can you just do me a favor real quick?
3
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Let s play a game.
3
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I want you to make a list of all of the amazing things that you ve done.
3
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All the moments when you felt like you were a badass or you felt really accomplished or you felt really awesome.
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Cause I could think of a bunch of them in my mind, but I think she was forgetting.
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She starts making this list and she starts telling me all these amazing
3
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She s got nothing I knew about, but she forgot.
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She s going and she s going, spreading down.
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I m like, oh, read those to me now.
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And she starts reading them to me.
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She, this girl ran the New York city marathon.
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She had made hundreds of thousands of dollars in her business.
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She had moved to New York by herself.
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She was on a New York city billboard as a model.
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She d done all these incredible things.
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And I m like, okay, if you were reading this about somebody else, would you be impressed with them?
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And this person, if it wasn t you, she s like, yeah.
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And I m like, all right, is this person worthy of launching the course that you re afraid to launch right now?
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If that was not you, it was a different person.
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Just hold up.
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I m like, that s you.
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And she was like, you re right.
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And it was a complete reframe.
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And I was like, oh my God, I m going to do this too.
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This is the best.
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This is the baddest.
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We re going to always remind ourselves of it.
3
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Because it s not necessarily just reflecting on your wonderful moments.
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That s great.
3
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It s self-distancing yourself from it.
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It s reading it as if you re reading it about somebody else.
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Because sometimes when we think about ourselves, we re just too close to our experiences and they don t seem as cool.
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And we spend a lot of time on the internet, scrolling and comparing ourselves to other people and thinking that other people have got it all going on and they ve got the best lives and the best businesses where they re showing their highlight reel.
3
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And we forget how awesome we are because we don t look at ourselves that way.
3
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So my fat ass list strategy, instead of like reverse bucket list, I think is amazing and reflecting on all the wonderful things you ve done.
3
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But what if you were to read those things as if you were reading about somebody else?
3
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and being truly impressed with someone else that did all those things.
3
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And then remembering, oh, that badass, that s me.
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That s me.
3
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I love that advice.
3
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And I want to go deeper into authenticity.
3
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And I want to just share a story about myself and then
3
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Have you maybe comment on it?
3
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I remember when I was starting out on this whole path, I had started writing the manuscript for the book that I ve got coming out in February.
3
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And I was putting together the book proposal and I started circulating this to agents and the agents all started coming back to me with the same message.
3
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You had this amazing corporate career as a senior executive, but unfortunately you have no personal brand.
3
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You re known because you were the CIO of Dell, or you were a partner in a big four consulting firm, or you ve done private equity work, but no one knows what you re really about.
3
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So how do we know that anything you re going to say is going to resonate with anyone?
3
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And I remember when I heard that,
3
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and I was starting out, I was agonizing about finding my uniqueness and how do I stand out.
3
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Out of the millions of influencers that are out there, the self-help people, the authors, I started to think, how do I differentiate myself?
3
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I am a big fan of Lewis Howes.
3
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I have always listened to the School of Greatness.
3
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One day,
3
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He was having a conversation and it happened to be with a friend of mine, Rory Vaden.
3
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Rory, who you may know, makes this statement that you are best positioned to serve the person you once were.
3
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A light bulb went off and that was authenticity as a superpower in me trying to help the people whom I once was.
3
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Using that as an illustration, in what ways do you think individuals can leverage their authenticity as a superpower in personal branding?
3
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Well, your personal brand is you, and there s thousands, maybe millions of other people out there that talk about personal development.
3
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There s millions of doctors, there s millions of interior designers, there s millions of experts in
3
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fitness and health and wellness and nutrition.
3
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You can find an expert on absolutely anything.
3
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There s probably somebody that does the exact same thing as you.
3
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But the good news is, the way to stand out from the crowd is to lean into more of who you are, because there s only one you.
3
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There are so many other things about the reason that you like Lewis is probably because of all of the unique things that Lewis is.
3
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Lewis s story of being an athlete, the way that Lewis communicates, the way that he asks questions, the fact that he is like a football player and like all the things that are unique to his story is probably one of the reasons why you follow and listen to him.
3
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And a lot of people, the more that you lean into your story, John, like when you just said that you were the CIO of Dell, I leaned in a little bit.
3
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I didn t know that.
3
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That s so cool.
3
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That s unique.
3
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You bring a different perspective than everybody else in the personal development space because you have that experience in corporate.
3
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That s unique to you and nobody else, the way that you communicate.
3
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Like for me, I used to try to be like somebody else all the time.
3
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I was like, I need to be this way for people to like me.
3
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I need to be all like buttoned up or I need to be,
3
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actually the opposite, more metal, more create this personality.
3
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But I realized that the thing that was going to make me stand out is just being more Jen.
3
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Being like the way that I am, the fact that I have three dogs and I m from New York and I love lifting weights and I love watching baking shows, but I don t bake and I don t cook.
3
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And like all the weird things that make you, you, those are the things that people are going to actually want be connected to more so than anybody else.
3
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The more unique you can be to who you truly are, the more you re going to connect with an audience that loves you for you, that s going to follow you along your journey and be like, you know what?
3
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No, the person that I follow for personal development is John, because I resonate with him on so many levels.
3
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And that s my person.
3
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If you re all things to all people, then you re not going to.
3
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get as deep or as strong of a following as if you are like super unique to you and maybe you turn off some people and that s okay.
3
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That s amazing.
3
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And those people are going to follow someone else that they resonate with more, but at least you re going to attract the people that are really like into who you are and connect with you.
3
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And you re going to be able to help them even more because they resonate with your story, with your uniqueness.
3
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I love that story.
3
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And I m going to touch on it with another story of mine that I think will amplify this.
3
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I remember when I started out this podcast, I was being coached by a woman named Hillary Billings.
3
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I don t know if Hillary, she was Miss Nevada way back in the day, but she is an expert on TikTok and short form videos.
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But she was listening to my podcast and she started to say, John, you on these shows are trying to act like you re Jay Shetty or Lewis Howes or Ed Millett or whoever it may be, Tom Bilyeu.
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but you re not showing up.
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as yourself.
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She was absolutely right.
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When I started to do that, it was as if a hockey stick went off because I leaned into that and I leaned into my uniqueness.
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I have to tell you, Mac, yesterday we were ranked in the top 50 podcasts in the United States.
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We have 150,000-200,000 downloads per episode now.
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When people ask me why has it been so successful, it s because
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I think I leaned into that uniqueness and I started just pressing for better or for worse.
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I m just going to be myself because I think people want to hear the vulnerability from the person that they re talking or who s talking, who is then going to get them to either.
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They re going to like your stories or they re not.
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And you just have to be happy with that.
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Yeah, or.
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You don t have to be happy, but you just have to be like, okay, this is what it is.
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Honestly, people like to follow people they can connect with.
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And the more vulnerable you are, the more you open up, the more people can connect with you.
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It doesn t mean that you have to share everything in the world.
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I actually have a whole chapter in my book about when not to be sleepy.
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So I think people get this wrong sometimes.
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They re like, Oh Jen, do I have to share everything in my life in order to be authentic?
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No, absolutely not.
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But it s showing up just as you are, like just being yourself and bringing your unique story to the table.
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I think that there, there are there literally, there is only one person on this planet with your unique story, John.
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And the more that you can share that and the more that you can shine that really, really brightly, the more people are going to be like, wow, I follow him because I m so
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touched by his story and it resonates with me and I see myself in that story.
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And for me, there s going to be a lot of people that don t like my stuff or don t like, here s a great example.
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I dress a certain way when I speak on stage.
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I don t know if you saw any of these posts, but I ve had major speaking engagements that did not get booked.
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Stages that totally rejected me.
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And they said, we can t have her on our stage because she dresses to quote unquote provocatively to be on our stage.
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Honestly, there was a split second where I was like, Oh my God, do I need to change the way that I am to start really building my speaking career?
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And I thought about it for a second.
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And then I was like, you know what?
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My whole thing is to teach people to be exactly as they are.
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And there s going to be stages that just doesn t align and they don t get it.
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And that s totally cool.
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And that s totally okay.
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I m going to keep being myself and doing that and consistently sticking with that and just like wearing my outfits.
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What is provocative anyway?
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I don t care.
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It doesn t really matter.
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Wearing the outfits that I wear has actually now been a reason why people have been hiring me.
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Because it s become a thing.
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They re like, what s Jen going to wear?
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If I would have just transformed that for what everybody wanted me to be to book stages and been what they needed and wore really like a whatever, a not-Jen outfit, then I don t think I would have built the strong brand that I ve built where people are now asking me to speak because they re excited about the cute whatever out there outfit I m going to wear.
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It s so interesting you bring that up.
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I don t know if you know who Christina Mon-Lakiani is.
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She co-founded Mindvalley, and I was talking to her about her keynote speeches, and she said one of the first ones she had to give, she had to follow one of the biggest influencers that there is.
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She wouldn t tell me who it was.
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I think it was Tony Robbins, by the way she was describing this person, but larger than life, used their presence
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to control the crowd, etc.
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And she said, I m sitting back there and having this agony.
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Do I completely change my approach because I m nothing like that?
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And she started to think about it as she was getting on the stage and she was really nervous.
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And then she looked out on the stage and she said,
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Ultimately, I am not here for me.
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I am here to serve this audience.
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And the best way that I can serve them is by being who I am, because that s who I m most comfortable being.
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And she said she went up there on the stage, gave a completely different talk, one that was just really rooted in raw vulnerability, a much softer tone.
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but possibly a more authentic tone.
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And she ended up getting a standing ovation.
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And she said from that point forward, she just learned that she really needed to lean in on that because that s who she is.
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And she didn t need to try to pretend to be someone else.
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So I think your advice on that is great because that s who you are and people are either not going to like it or they re going to love it.
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And the people who love it are going to want more and more of it.
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So thank you for sharing that.
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I love that story.
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That makes me feel so much better.
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I actually talk about this a lot too.
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I speak on a lot of stages with a lot of men.
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It s just often a situation that I find myself in where I m one of the only women and I m always following very strong men on stage.
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And I love that you shared that with me because there s always a moment and this always happens to me.
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where for a second I m like, do I need to change my talk right now?
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I think I do.
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Two seconds before, because the guy that read my Let s Book before me or Eric Thomas, these guys that have this amazing keynote that they do, but it s a totally different energy.
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And I immediately think, oh my God, I need to totally change everything that I have talked about.
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This has happened to me so many times.
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And now one of my pre-show rituals I ve had to implement is to say to myself every time before I go on stage, no matter who goes before me is, Jenny, be more you.
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Be more you.
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You more you because it s not about me.
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It s actually what I can get to them and I use the acronym help help one person every day.
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If I m obsessed with getting on stage and being more like what was just before me because I m so insecure in the way that I might show up and I might not be good enough for these people or they might not like it because they just like something different for me then.
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I m not going to help anybody.
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But if I just go on, just like what you just said, I love them.
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And just focus on helping them and doing what I do best in order to help that one person in the room that needs to hear what I have to say that day.
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I have to be more just who I am and not try to be like anybody else.
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That s so common, especially with the world that we live in with social media, wanting to, seeing something like, oh, I shouldn t do it my way.
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I should do it this way.
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This way is clearly better.
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But instead of doing that, looking inward and being more curious and tapping back into, what s the superpower that I have that s unique?
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And that, like what you said earlier, what Rory always says is you re the most equipped to help the person that you used to be.
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Think about that person on the other side of the phone.
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Think about that person in the audience that you re talking to in that moment.
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And if you just focus on helping them and doing whatever, like letting go of what you look like, what you sound like.
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If you re saying the right thing or not, you just focus on helping that person.
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Usually the authentic truth will come out of who you are.
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Because when we re just having a conversation with a friend and we re just leaning in and we re just talking to them and helping them, we re our most authentic self.
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We re not thinking about trying to be like anybody else.
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We re just pouring into that person, trying to help them.
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And that s usually the most powerful thing that we can do.
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I love that.
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I want to talk to you about a couple more things that I think listeners might really be struggling with, and one of those is rejection.
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I m going to start this out again by being vulnerable about myself.
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I cannot tell you how many agents rejected me when I was trying to get my book.
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How many publishers rejected me?
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How many podcasts I ve been trying to get on that have rejected me?
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People who I ve even had on my show aren t getting back to me.
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And it goes well beyond there.
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People see the show and they re like, how do you get these amazing guests?
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Well, what they don t realize is that
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I ve tried to get on Gabby Bernstein.
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I ve tried to get on Mel Robbins, Amy Porterfield, Renee Brown, Lewis Howes, Jay Shetty, Ed Millett, Hilary Swank, Matthew McConaughey.
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I could go on and on.
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They ve all said no.
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Gabby said no 12 times.
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I feel someday she is going to be on the show because I think sometimes things just happen when the timing is right.
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But how does someone who is facing rejections like this understand that rejection is a form of inner resilience and that inner resilience drives us eventually to have greater opportunities that open up for us?
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Yeah, rejection really sucks.
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I m just going to say it because I don t want to sit here and say, you got to just get over rejection because that would be silly because every time I get rejected, which is often very often, just like you, when I was pitching my book, I got rejected from a lot of podcasts.
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I got rejected from a lot of publishers before I got my yes from him.
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I got rejected when I was an actress.
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I basically spent every single day getting rejected every day, all day, rejection after rejection.
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I read all my old journals from that time in my life.
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And I feel sad for my old self, because I would be like, I got rejected for the 20th time today.
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When is this ever going to work for me?
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Like, I just keep hearing no.
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And I never want to take that away from people.
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That stings.
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It sucks.
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It doesn t feel good.
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But let s go back to what we were talking about earlier when this whole concept of what do you want your relationship with that to be?
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So we can t control when we get those no s.
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We can t control it.
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We can t control that it feels shitty when you get a no, when you get rejected.
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It s not a good feeling, but we can.
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shift our relationship to that rejection.
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We can actually, like what I ve learned to do over time is I have a relationship now with rejection where I m like, bring it, reject me more, please.
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I am adding up all of these rejections because I can t wait for the moment when you are calling me, asking me to do your show when you rejected me so many times before.
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I actually have flipped my relationship with this, not overnight, but with a lot of practice to make it so that it fuels me, knows fuel me.
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Every time you tell me no, it s just like, I m so excited because I know that no is secretly a yes to something else in the future.
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And the only way that I was able to realize that for myself was to really connect the dots, looking backwards and look back to every single note that I ever got in my past.
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And, um, uh, almost really just really curious about how did that know eventually turn into a yes.
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And you can always find the S the boyfriend that broke up with me.
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Thank God he did.
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Thank God he left me for one of my friends.
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I thought because I wouldn t have met my husband that I m married to now, which is my soulmate and my business partner.
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And I m not saying that one can make the best things out of everything because some things just suck.
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But if you really look and you really become a detective and you really understand, okay, what happened as a result of this?
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No.
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Did I actually become a more resilient person because I got that rejection?
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Did that actually put another freaking notch in my belt that, you know what?
5
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I m strong.
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I can get through this because every single time you move through any uncomfortable moment, you become a little bit stronger.
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You become a little bit more resilient.
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So the more no s that I ve heard in my life, the more resilient of a person I ve become.
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So now I m like, I m a champ at getting rejected.
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Tell me no again and again.
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And here s another tool that I use now.
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This is a lot of people think I m crazy for doing this, but I do it and it helps me so much.
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I have an album in my phone called Rejection Emails.
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Now what is rejection emails and text messages?
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It s a special album in my photos, and every time someone emails me and says, no, thank you, or we re going to pass, or maybe next time, I screenshot it, and I add it into my album, and I have this whole collection.
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It s a very big collection of rejection.
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And I do that because it helps me shift my relationship with that rejection.
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I m adding it in, I m adding it to the album.
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Oh, got another one in there.
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This is just making me even more resilient.
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Here s another point for me in my resilience moving forward.
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And then a really cool thing can start to happen eventually.
5
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Cause I ve been doing this for long enough now that now I go back into that album and I look at some of the older rejections from years ago and I m like, wow,
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They rejected me then, but look at how they want me back now.
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Or look at how this rejection actually turned into a relationship or turned into an opportunity.
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Or if I would have done that, I wouldn t have gotten this and I can connect the dots and I can see why that rejection was so unbelievably important.
5
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And maybe you can believe whatever you want.
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Everything happens for a reason or maybe not, but either way, it helps me with my relationship with it to be able to go and look back and understand why and connect the dots and
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Again, it s made me so resilient.
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And when people tell me no, like I m just yes, it stings for a second, but I m way faster to be like, I ll prove you wrong.
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Can t wait until I m so expensive that you can t afford me next.
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I mean, I just say that in my mind, put it in my rejection album and move on.
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And then I try to prove them wrong.
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It fuels me.
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Thank you so much for sharing that, Jen.
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And another topic, I think,
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That s important for people to understand is networking.
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And I am like you, I m an introvert.
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I have been known to be good at networking, but I have to tell you at those events, I come out of them and I am just absolutely exhausted and I dread them.
5
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And I recently had one of these events about six weeks ago.
5
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I had interviewed Jim Quick.
5
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He s, John, why don t you come down to Miami?
5
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You re close.
5
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I got this book launch coming.
5
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And so I said, yes, I ll be there, Jim.
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And I walk into this event and I know maybe five people out of 300.
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I was there too.
5
SPEAKER_00
This last Miami event?
5
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Yes.
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I was there.
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Yeah, I was there and I said, coming into this, and I know you use this philosophy, which I want you to explore a little bit more.
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I said, I had three goals.
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One was to do a bunch of selfies, which I didn t achieve.
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I didn t achieve that goal, so I still regret it.
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But the bigger goal was I wanted to give three books away to people.
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who I thought it would bring meaning to.
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And I was able to do that.
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And then I wanted to make three new connections that I didn t have before.
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And I was able to do that.
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And then I wanted to get out of the event to three to four people to come on the podcast who I d never met before.
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And I accomplished all those goals.
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And to me, it s going into them with an outcome that I can feel good about the time that I put into.
5
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That is so important.
5
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And this is something that I think you believe in as well.
5
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Yes.
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I m also an introvert and here s the thing.
5
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You got another person from that party on to your podcast without even talking to them at the party.
5
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So that was me.
5
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So there you go.
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There s another win for you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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One of my roles for networking for me as an introvert is not rules, but strategies.
5
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is to always go in with a goal.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because what I used to do is I would go into a networking event and I would just be like, hutzin  around.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, let s, something s gonna happen or when can I leave?
5
SPEAKER_00
The worst part is when can I leave?
5
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And then if you leave too early, you ve got FOMO or you feel like, oh, maybe I should have stayed longer.
5
SPEAKER_00
But when you go in with a goal and you ve got, okay, my goal is to connect with three people here and get three people onto my podcast.
5
SPEAKER_00
When you ve done that, you feel like you won.
5
SPEAKER_00
You went for a reason, you had your intention, you did the thing you needed to do, and then you can leave feeling great about it.
5
SPEAKER_00
And every introvert s favorite moment of the night is when you can leave and feel amazing about what you did in the room, right?
5
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I love making connections.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
5
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I love things that happen with connections.
5
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I love my dear friends.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love conversations like this, but I m not so excited to go.
5
SPEAKER_00
I never really want to go, but I m always happy I went.
5
SPEAKER_00
So when you go in with a goal, you have that amazing feeling when you leave that you accomplished your goal.
5
SPEAKER_00
You re like, I did it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
5
SPEAKER_00
I did the thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
I went to the event and that feels good.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then you want to go to another one later because you remember the good feeling.
5
SPEAKER_00
Not like, Oh, I went, I punched around.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t really know if I did anything.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then I left and I think I left a little too early and then you feel bad about it.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then you don t want to go to the next one.
5
SPEAKER_00
Go in with a goal, succeed at your goal and then leave.
5
SPEAKER_00
And you ll always have a positive experience at a networking event.
5
SPEAKER_00
And if you re really introverted and make your goal super easy, get there.
5
SPEAKER_00
Stay for an hour and talk to people.
5
SPEAKER_00
And 1 of the other tips that I have for networking as an introvert is to make it super, super easy for introverts that don t love talking about themselves.
5
SPEAKER_00
Is whenever I go to a networking event, I always just think of, like, how can I be the most interested person in this room instead of trying to be interesting instead of talking about myself.
5
SPEAKER_00
How can I go in and be unbelievably curious and figure out how I can help people here when you go in with that mindset and you just ask a lot of questions and you try to find out what people need help and you become a detective and you get really curious and you ask questions not only.
5
SPEAKER_00
Do you figure out a lot of really amazing things about people that you can provide value to them with when you leave?
5
SPEAKER_00
Because the most important part of any networking situation is the follow up.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I m always thinking about clues for the best follow up.
5
SPEAKER_00
How do I follow up with somebody with value?
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, you got to figure out what they need help with.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then also, you don t have to really talk about yourself that much because you re asking a lot of questions.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then the last thing, most important thing is everyone s favorite topic is themselves.
5
SPEAKER_00
So if you give people an opportunity to talk about themselves and you ask them questions and you genuinely are curious about them, they re going to feel so seen and so loved and so valued by that conversation that they re going to leave that event, remembering you.
5
SPEAKER_00
And they re going to be like, oh my God, I love John.
5
SPEAKER_00
That was my favorite conversation of the night.
5
SPEAKER_00
And you probably didn t even say anything about yourself.
5
SPEAKER_00
You just ask them questions and let them talk about themselves and truly listen.
5
SPEAKER_00
At the end of the day, everyone really just wants to feel seen.
5
SPEAKER_01
I love that advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
And it s exactly what I utilized at that party because to be honest, no one had a clue who I was.
5
SPEAKER_01
And it was surprising once they started asking me that they actually knew about things I was doing, but had no idea that I was the person behind it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Jen, we didn t get a chance to even touch the surface of your book.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s one of these books that I so encourage the audience to get because it s one you re going to keep going back to again and again.
5
SPEAKER_01
And some of the things we didn t get to discuss today were exercising the confidence muscle, how you get over things like FOMO, how you build that credibility and authority.
5
SPEAKER_01
I love how you talk about your stories about how you did Instagram live, and it s something I need to do more of.
5
SPEAKER_01
How you embrace failures to craft your unique story, growing an audience of raving fans, the power of giving value, and so many more topics.
5
SPEAKER_01
If there was one thing that you wanted to leave the audience with from this episode or from your book, what would that takeaway be?
5
SPEAKER_00
We did touch a lot of things though.
5
SPEAKER_00
I know you just went off a list of a lot of things that we didn t talk about, which are a lot of things we should do an episode part two, but we did touch on so many things today.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I loved this conversation with you.
5
SPEAKER_00
I would leave the audience with a few things.
5
SPEAKER_00
Number one, if you re listening to this podcast, you re in the right place.
5
SPEAKER_00
This is definitely somebody that you want to learn from.
5
SPEAKER_00
I just got to meet you and connect with you.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I think that you re doing, you are basically practicing what you preach, which is so beautiful.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I love that.
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I love being aligned with people that do the things that they re learning.
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There s a lot of people on the internet that you can follow and some people talk about stuff and don t actually do them and you are actively doing all the things that you talk about.
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So if you re listening, I just want to tell you that you re in the right place and congratulate yourself for even just putting in your earbuds or playing this in your car and giving yourself this gift of, of learning a little, growing a little and listening to a conversation that could maybe inspire you to take action in a different way.
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And then the last thing that I ll leave you with is like nothing happens.
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This
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is what I keep going back to again and again.
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You can think about things all day.
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So your podcast is called Passion Struck.
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And you told me at the beginning that many people that are listening to this are feeling very stuck.
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And it is really easy to use this excuse of, I have to get completely clear on what my passion is, what my purpose is, and what the next step is before I can take action.
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And I did that for so long and it doesn t work.
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I will tell you right now that only from experience, I can t tell you this from any other thing other than my own experience, that the only way that you can get clear on what it is that s going to fuel you and fill you up and make you feel fulfilled is by trying things and doing things and allowing yourself to be imperfect, allowing yourself to fail, allowing yourself to get rejected and taking action.
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And I promise you,
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that the discomfort of doing something scared or doing something imperfectly, or maybe getting rejected, it s uncomfortable, but it will pass.
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One of my favorite things to say to myself all the time is discomfort is temporary, but growth is permanent.
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And the person that you become on the other side of that temporary discomfort, taking action before you re ready, starting before you re ready, doing the thing before you feel prepared, doing the thing before you feel clear, you re going to get closer to what it is that you want.
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And you re going to prove to yourself that you can move through that temporary discomfort in order to become
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a bigger, more equipped, more evolved version of yourself.
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That s what I would do.
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Yeah, thank you so much for sharing that.
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And that advice rings true so much in my life as well.
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I remember every single position that I positioned myself for, did I have every skill set, all the knowledge on how to do it?
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No.
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But I knew I had the self-confidence that I could learn and I had a great foundation
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to step into it.
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So I think that s such important is don t fear yourself out of life-changing opportunities.
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Embrace the strengths that you have because they re going to carry you forward.
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And Jen, I know you ve got some big things coming up.
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Can you talk about those and maybe the best place where people can get to know more about you?
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Yeah, I know you were talking.
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You should come, John.
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It s going to be absolutely incredible.
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It s called build your brand live.
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going to be in Atlanta.
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We didn t even announce the dates yet or the location.
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So hopefully by the time this comes out, we ve already announced it because right now, as we re speaking, nothing has been announced, but we just did this event not too long ago in October and it was absolutely epic.
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600 people, lots of speakers.
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Gabby Bernstein was one of our keynote speakers.
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We had, it was incredible.
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Build Your Brand Live is coming and I m not going to announce the date yet, but you can just follow me on Instagram.
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All the updates will be there.
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I would love for everyone to listen to this podcast.
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to come.
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It is a motivational, inspirational event that will help you build your brand.
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And we also talk a lot about using artificial intelligence to do that and really diving into AI and how to create better content and a bigger, more scalable, personal brand with AI.
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Follow me at Jen underscore Gottlieb to learn more.
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All of the information is always on Instagram.
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I do a live every day.
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I go live on Instagram every single morning while I put my makeup on.
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every day, Monday through Friday.
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It s not the same time every day.
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So just set your notifications on my profile and you can join me.
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We have a lot of fun every single morning getting ready together.
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And that takes a lot of guts because you do it without makeup, which I m sure a lot of women would just dread.
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So congratulations to you for doing that.
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Well, Jen, I knew this episode was going to be good, but you 10 Xed it.
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So thank you so much for being here, man.
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It was my honor.
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And I m so glad that Dr. Lyon put you into our lives, our mutual lives.
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Thank you so much.
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Thank you so much for having me, John.
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This was great.
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I thoroughly enjoyed that interview with Jen Gottlieb, and I wanted to thank Jen and Dr. Gabrielle Lyon for the honor and privilege of having her appear today on the show.
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Links to all things Jen will be in the show notes at passionstruck.com.
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Please use our website links if you purchase any of the books from the guests that we feature here on the show.
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All proceeds go to supporting the show.
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Videos are on YouTube at both our main channel, John R. Miles, and our Clips channel at Passionstruck Clips.
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Please go check it out and subscribe.
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I also wanted to invite you to join the
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Passionstruck Challenge.
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Each week throughout 2024, we are going to be sending our community a new challenge that takes them closer to their aspirations of becoming passionstruck.
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You can join this challenge by going to our website at passionstruck.com forward slash challenge.
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You can also sign up for our weekly newsletter, Live Intentionally, where I give tips on personal development and mastery.
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And you can also sign up for our personal development newsletter, Live Intentionally, at passionstruck.com.
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You can find me on all the social platforms at John R. Miles.
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And lastly, you can sign up for our work-related newsletter, Work Intentionally, on LinkedIn.
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If you want to know how I am able to book amazing guests like John Gottlieb, it s because of my network.
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Go out there and build yours before you need it.
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You re about to hear a preview of the passion struck podcast interview that I did with coach Matt Doherty, who not only played on the university of North Carolina national championship team with Michael Jordan and James Worthy, but also coached the Tar Heels.
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But in 2003, Matt faced one of the biggest challenges in his life.
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He was forced to resign from that dream job.
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And I discussed with him how he rebounded from that failure to rebuild himself and prepare for his next opportunity.
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I did not manage change properly.
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And that really was tough to shake.
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The only way to overcome that is massive success, which I had my first year.
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We were number one in the country.
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We beat Duke at Duke.
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We were tied for the ACC championship.
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And then my second year, we had the worst record in Carolina basketball history.
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So now the floodgates could open.
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It still bothers me.
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There s still moments.
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There s always triggers for me, North Carolina, the university, the basketball program, college basketball, those triggers, tough emotions.
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And at first I tried to be a tough guy and act like there s no big deal.
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It s just part of the business and things happen.
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And I was working with an executive coach at the time.
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And she said.
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No, no.
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You trusted this institution, these men, when you were 17 years old.
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Now you feel betrayed by a father figure.
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That made me realize that what I was feeling was real.
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It allowed me to deal with it a little bit better.
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Remember that we rise
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by lifting others.
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So share this show with those that you love and care about.
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If you found today s episode with Jen Gottlieb on being seen influential, then definitely share it with your friends and family members who could use the words that we gave here today.
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In the meantime, do your best to apply what you hear on the show so that you can live what you listen.
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Until next week, go out there and become PassionStruck.