0
SPEAKER_01
Hello?
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, who s this?
0
SPEAKER_00
Sabo?
0
SPEAKER_00
What kind of name is Sabo?
0
SPEAKER_00
I assume that s not your real name.
0
SPEAKER_01
What do you explore?
0
SPEAKER_01
How long have you been exploring sewers for?
0
SPEAKER_01
Uh, probably like a couple of years now.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
Uh, I just, I got into it cause one day I showed up to work.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, I used to work at a tropical fish store and, uh, it was a really slow day.
0
SPEAKER_01
And my coworkers showed up high and I was just like, chill with it.
0
SPEAKER_01
It was whatever.
0
SPEAKER_01
Uh, and then at the very end of the shift, he just asked me if I wanted to go check out, uh, check out a cave in a sewer and I had nothing better to do.
0
SPEAKER_01
So.
0
SPEAKER_01
I went.
0
SPEAKER_00
How long had you known this guy before he asked you if you wanted to check out a cave in a sewer with him?
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, I want to say only like four months.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s a good enough amount of time to know somebody before you go into a cave with them.
0
SPEAKER_00
Tell me about cave guy.
0
SPEAKER_01
Cave guy.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well,
0
SPEAKER_01
There are multiple cave guys.
0
SPEAKER_01
There are a lot of cave guys, but you want to know about the cave guy?
0
SPEAKER_00
I want to know, when I say cave guy, I mean the guy who took you to a cave.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
So he, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
He was just another, I mean, he was my age and yeah, I guess he d been doing it since he was like young, like 13, which seems kind of like where was his parents, but you know, hey man, he can do him.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um,
0
SPEAKER_01
No, he was cool.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
We just worked at a dingy tropical fish store together and like occasionally we would like smoke weed before and after work.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, and, uh, yeah, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
He was, he was chill.
0
SPEAKER_01
I love it.
0
SPEAKER_01
He was a great guy.
0
SPEAKER_00
He moved out to Florida, but that really does have to be one of the best jobs ever.
0
SPEAKER_01
It was pretty good, honestly.
0
SPEAKER_00
Getting high in a store that nobody goes into ever, that s almost certainly a front for something else, and then afterwards, and then you meet cool guys who take you into caves.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s a sick job.
0
SPEAKER_01
Sorry, someone was knocking on my door.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, it was a fucking awesome job.
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I love fish tanks.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m surrounded by pretty fish.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s dimly lit.
0
SPEAKER_01
All the tanks are super old.
0
SPEAKER_01
It did look like a front.
0
SPEAKER_01
The building had no windows.
0
SPEAKER_01
Everybody I talked to thought it was a front.
0
SPEAKER_01
I even had people come in and ask me if I sold drugs late at night because they thought it was a front for fucking drugs.
0
SPEAKER_01
It was fucking stupid.
0
SPEAKER_00
How many times per shift would a customer come in?
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I mean, like during the weekdays, like only like four or five, honestly.
0
SPEAKER_01
On the weekends, it could get pretty busy.
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, there s a lot of people who got, who got fish they got to take care of, you know, but during the weekdays it was pretty dead.
0
SPEAKER_00
Bro, I really think about this stuff all the time.
0
SPEAKER_00
Like, you know, what, uh, can I ask what city this fish store is in?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, Minneapolis Okay, I mean cuz I I always wonder like okay.
0
SPEAKER_00
There s certain like to keep a business open
0
SPEAKER_00
costs a lot of money every month, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
And it s like, there s a certain amount of, um, tropical fish that you need to sell to, like, break even.
0
SPEAKER_00
And then you gotta sell, like, double that to actually make any money.
0
SPEAKER_00
So how the fuck does this fish store afford to stay open?
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, by, the owner is a total
0
SPEAKER_01
cheapskate he like he paid me like less than minimum wage and then he also like genuinely talked about me to me about how like he didn t believe minimum wage should be a thing he was like it s like i should be able to negotiate you know my wages with my prospective employees you know as
0
SPEAKER_01
You know, as he was paying me, like, several dollars for the minimum wage.
0
SPEAKER_01
Sabo.
0
SPEAKER_00
Sabo, look, I m all for workers  rights and minimum wage, okay?
0
SPEAKER_00
But it sounds like you got paid about as much as you should to get high and look at fish all day.
0
SPEAKER_01
I didn t just get high and look at fish all day, dude.
0
SPEAKER_01
I was, like, cleaning the tanks and stuff like that.
0
SPEAKER_01
Just, like,
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, and like on busy days, like I was selling like thousands of dollars worth of like fish tanks and stuff like that.
0
SPEAKER_01
So I thought I was, well, I mean, it depends on the fish, you know, there are some fish that are only like $2 a piece, but then there were several fish that were like three or $400, you know, it really depended on the kind of fish.
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, do you still work at this place?
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, no, no, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_00
That was a long ago.
0
SPEAKER_00
But your love for exploring abandoned stuff carried over.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
And you still explore abandoned sewers.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, I still explore abandoned sewers.
0
SPEAKER_01
And it was really funny because like, so I don t work there anymore.
0
SPEAKER_01
I have a different job.
0
SPEAKER_01
And then at my next job,
0
SPEAKER_01
there was another guy who was like even more into exploring than the first guy who had showed me a bunch of more stuff.
0
SPEAKER_01
And like, dude, he took me to like, like underground festivals, right?
0
SPEAKER_01
Like there s like a whole week long thing in Minneapolis where like people come from all over the country just to explore our tunnels and stuff.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s pretty crazy.
0
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that is pretty cool.
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, what s, what s the festival called?
0
SPEAKER_00
It s called Mouser Week.
0
SPEAKER_00
Mouser week, tell me about Mouser week.
0
SPEAKER_01
Uh, yeah, I mean, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s, it s pretty simple, honestly.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s just a bunch of people from all around the country, even in the world, um, who just enjoy like urban exploring.
0
SPEAKER_01
And so they come to come to Minneapolis for a week and, uh, we just have throw big, like cave parties and stuff like that and explore together and, um, just have a good time in general.
0
SPEAKER_00
Anything crazy ever go down at these cave parties?
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah, dude.
0
SPEAKER_01
Last year, there was a Prohibition Esquitarian themed party in like an old bootlegging cave.
0
SPEAKER_01
And there was like a projector with a silent movie.
0
SPEAKER_01
There was like a whole ass horse skeleton.
0
SPEAKER_01
There was like an art gallery.
0
SPEAKER_01
There was a barter blackjack.
0
SPEAKER_01
There was a full cocktail bar, like
0
SPEAKER_01
people like tapped into the street lamps nearby and like ran power into the cave.
0
SPEAKER_01
So it was fully lit up and we even had internet.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, and then like there was performances, there was like fire dancers and like music.
0
SPEAKER_01
And then there was a sewer ballet where, um, there was like the pure surface dwellers versus like the, the dirty sewer people.
0
SPEAKER_01
And they like got into a battle, but then by the end they like became friends and were dancing in a circle.
0
SPEAKER_01
And then there was like an offering to the sewer goddess where people just, you know, left gifts in order to have good luck and not get lost in the tunnels.
0
SPEAKER_01
It was, uh, it was pretty wild.
0
SPEAKER_01
It was a good time.
0
SPEAKER_00
Does it smell?
0
SPEAKER_01
In the sewers?
0
SPEAKER_01
It definitely can.
0
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes it s, it s really nasty, honestly.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, thankfully I m like partially nose blind, so I don t mind it as much, but it s, it s, it s really gross.
0
SPEAKER_01
Like I don t,
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t really enjoy being in the sewers that much, but I go into the sewers because they re connected to other things.
0
SPEAKER_00
You go into the sewers because the hottest parties in Minneapolis are going on down there.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
0
100%.
0
SPEAKER_01
There s like huge raves that happen down there and stuff like that.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s pretty wild.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s cool, man.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s cool.
0
SPEAKER_00
How often do you go into these sewer raves?
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t go to the sewer raves that often because I m not a huge party person a lot of the time.
0
SPEAKER_01
I ll go for special occasions, but they happen pretty often.
0
SPEAKER_01
There s probably one going down during certain
1
SPEAKER_01
terms of the year, there s probably one going down like every weekend.
1
SPEAKER_00
Dude, I absolutely need to do one of my gecko interview things at the sewer party.
1
SPEAKER_00
People are going to think I m cosplaying as a ninja turtle.
1
SPEAKER_01
You should, dude.
1
SPEAKER_01
Honestly, if you ever came to the Twin Cities, I could probably set it up where we could get internet into a cave.
1
SPEAKER_01
We could generally have a show in a cave.
1
SPEAKER_01
Alright, I m in.
1
SPEAKER_00
I think I m going to Minneapolis on my tour next year.
1
SPEAKER_00
So I m in.
1
SPEAKER_00
Seriously?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I think so.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m trying to.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, what happened last year was I went to Indianapolis and I thought that that was, I thought that Indianapolis and Minneapolis were the same thing because, you know, they both have Panapolis in it.
1
SPEAKER_00
What uh, what do you do now that you re not working that you re not getting high and looking at fish I m a locksmith Which is kind of ironic because sometimes I go to explore things.
1
SPEAKER_01
I have to like Trespass, you know, but hey It s not people s homes.
1
SPEAKER_01
So mm-hmm
1
SPEAKER_00
As a locksmith, do you like, can you theoretically break into anybody s house?
1
SPEAKER_01
Uh, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I m not like, I m not that, it s funny.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m not actually that good at like lock picking.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like it s a really small part of my job is like lock manipulation, but like I know the weak points in a lock and could get in within like probably a minute or less.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, do you foresee a universe where you ever use this skill for evil, like to steal chickens from a coop or something?
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, I mean, I feel like if it was like life or death, I probably would, but I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I, I try to, I try to be a good boy, you know, where have you broken into?
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I wouldn t say I ve broken in, but to get into the sewers, you have to pop a manhole in the middle of the street.
1
SPEAKER_01
I ve also been inside of abandoned mills and stuff like that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes you have to go through rail yards and stuff like that to get into some of these spots.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s bulls after you.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if you know what bulls are in rail lingo.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no, it s just sometimes you gotta sneak around people to get to the cool spots.
1
SPEAKER_00
What are bulls?
1
SPEAKER_01
They re just like the security guards of like rail yards, you know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think the reason they re called bulls is because hobos always had to run from them back in the day, you know, when they were trying to hop a train.
1
SPEAKER_00
Now, rail lingo.
1
SPEAKER_00
Let me hear some more rail lingo.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t, I m not as deep into the train hopping community as I would like to be.
1
SPEAKER_01
So I don t know, more rail lingo, I guess.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s your like, what s your name again?
1
SPEAKER_00
Sabo?
1
SPEAKER_00
Sabo, yeah, you can call me Sabo.
1
SPEAKER_00
Sabo, what s your prerogative, Sabo?
1
SPEAKER_00
What do you dream of at night?
1
SPEAKER_00
What s the future look like for Sabo?
1
SPEAKER_00
You can go anywhere, you can, there is literally, there is literally no place off limits to you.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I have, yeah, I have places I d like to go.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, I mean, there s a, I ve heard from like friends about like tunnels and other cities.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like there s some really crazy tunnels in Chicago and stuff like that.
1
SPEAKER_01
That d be cool to check out.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, I d also really like to, it d be really, really, really sick to break into like the, um, but like Chernobyl exclusion zone.
1
SPEAKER_01
Ukraine, that would be sick, but obviously there s a war going on in there right now, so I can t even get close to that, but I mean like, are you asking like as far as like just dreams in general, like what do I want to do with my life kind of deal, or just like where do I want to go?
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I kind of, honestly I hope my life ends up like
1
SPEAKER_01
Kind of like simple, like I d really like to just like make enough to be comfortable, have a significant other, you know, like have a nice house with a big garden and a, you know, a deciduous lawn and just like go to work and not be stressed out.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t really have like big aspirations.
1
SPEAKER_01
I just kind of want to like comfy, you know.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s good that you have an inexpensive hobby, because some people s hobby, as you know, is buying exotic fish.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I mean, I still do that sometimes, too, but not as much as I used to.
1
SPEAKER_00
I have a question for you before we go.
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you have any?
1
SPEAKER_00
safety concerns at all for for urban exploration because You know I by the way I myself I I don t do it that much anymore but I used to like when I was a kid be really into like, you know, exploring abandoned buildings and
1
SPEAKER_00
Basements and all that kind of shit, but I know that that like You can you can get a little fucked up whether it s like asbestos is running around or like a tile Breaks off and you fall down three stories, or you know you ever run into anything like that oh Yeah, no I actually I almost I almost killed my best friend while we were exploring once because uh I
1
SPEAKER_01
There s this one storm drain that we like to go into, and in order to get in, you have to go to the spot that s called Confuser.
1
SPEAKER_01
And the reason it s called Confuser is because there s like seven manholes in close proximity, and only one of them has a ladder.
1
SPEAKER_01
But it s like a really visible spot, so you have to like open the right one and get in quick, otherwise you ll get caught.
1
SPEAKER_01
And so we went there, and I opened the wrong one, and so my friend like started getting down in, you know,
1
SPEAKER_01
hanging onto the edge with his, like, arms.
1
SPEAKER_01
And he was like, I can t feel the ladder.
1
SPEAKER_01
I can t feel the ladder.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, shoot, we gotta, like, turn on a light and just, like, figure this out.
1
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, there was just, like, a 12-story drop beneath him.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, so we had to, like, pull him out.
1
SPEAKER_01
That wasn t fun.
1
SPEAKER_01
I really, I felt really bad for that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, so you gotta worry about stuff like that, you know?
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, and, uh, I ve also gotten, like, really sick from the sewers.
1
SPEAKER_01
I was bedridden for three days because I, like,
1
SPEAKER_01
basically got dysentery.
1
SPEAKER_01
So that kind of sucked.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
And there s asbestos and, you know, there s HS gas in the sewers, which can kill you.
1
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, if you get cuts and they get infected, that s not good either.
1
SPEAKER_01
So, yeah, it s really dangerous.
1
SPEAKER_01
But I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I kind of like the danger.
1
SPEAKER_01
Maybe I m a little bit of an adrenaline junkie in that way.
1
SPEAKER_00
You re like a Ninja Turtle.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Running around in sewers.
1
SPEAKER_01
Turtle power.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, man.
1
SPEAKER_00
It sounds like you were playing, like, manhole Russian roulette, pretty much.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s exactly what it was.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I m really lucky I didn t kill my best friend.
1
SPEAKER_01
That would have ruined my life, I think, if that had happened.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well Sabo, thanks for talking to me about- Thanks for op- You know what is cool about this conversation is God doesn t- I don t know if the folks at home can empathize with this but God doesn t life feel boring sometimes, you know?
1
SPEAKER_00
Don t you feel- Don t you ever feel like you already know all the stuff that exists out in the universe for you to do and you re just bored?
1
SPEAKER_00
I m glad I got to talk to you today because any day where I gain knowledge of a new thing that exists out in the universe, such as underground sewer parties, I gather a little bit more of my lust for life.
1
SPEAKER_00
So thanks for sharing all this stuff, Sabo.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
1
SPEAKER_01
Uh, Mouser s got a mouse.
1
SPEAKER_00
Turtle power.
1
SPEAKER_01
Turtle power.
1
SPEAKER_01
Have a good night, Cac.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hello?
1
SPEAKER_00
Hi.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hi.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s your name?
1
SPEAKER_01
My name is Ben.
1
SPEAKER_00
Ben.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s up, man?
1
SPEAKER_01
That s Gecko.
1
SPEAKER_00
This is Gecko.
1
SPEAKER_01
What s up?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, well, you know,
2
SPEAKER_00
What s up?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, well, we might speak about what I texted you before.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so I haven t worked in three years.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m paid by my company insurance, because I went through depression, like a deep fucking depression.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I get panic attacks and anxiety a lot about every fucking thing that exists.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I got to go back to work in like three weeks.
2
SPEAKER_01
So you, uh, your insurance, your, your, did you get like panic attacks, uh, as a result of your work?
2
SPEAKER_00
At the start?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Back then.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, when I went into depression three years ago.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Cause I worked like for the government and I sell alcohol for the government where I live.
2
SPEAKER_01
So it s like, uh, you sell alcohol for the government?
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
So it s like... And you are... You re in Montreal, correct?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s why you got the little... That s why you got the French thing going on.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s why.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s why.
2
SPEAKER_01
I was... I... Because I saw the... I saw the plus one.
2
SPEAKER_01
I saw the Canada area code by you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
And you started talking and I was like, this is a very funny sounding Canadian man, but you re French.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I am French, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like... It s like the actual like the...
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s the fun part of Canada.
2
SPEAKER_01
Now, why did selling alcohol for the government send you into a depression?
2
SPEAKER_00
I was because of Covid and, you know, like the laws here, like in the restrictions were like, I didn t mind them that much, but they were like pretty heavy and but like everything was closed.
2
SPEAKER_00
But like those the
2
SPEAKER_00
Like the liquor stores, they were still open though.
2
SPEAKER_00
Cause you know, we were making money for the government and also we re selling like it s a drug, you know, it s alcohol.
2
SPEAKER_00
So, and uh, so you, you cannot stop selling this cause people are just going to fucking break the windows and just go crazy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Every, every, every place that where they like the end, every place where they did close the liquor stores, they all got robbed.
2
SPEAKER_00
So.
2
SPEAKER_00
Anyways, so that s why we kept on working.
2
SPEAKER_00
My job pretty much changed into, I became like a bouncer, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
Because only 10 people could be in the store at the same time.
2
SPEAKER_00
I used to be working in a warehouse and now I had to be up front with fucking crazy people wanting their alcohol and just being aggressive.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know, it was a shitty time.
2
SPEAKER_00
So this was what sent me to depression.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then, um, since I was depressed, like, you know, you would think that you re, you re sad when you re depressed, but it s not the main thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
You re mostly like, like angry, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
And so I was angry and I stayed at my place.
2
SPEAKER_00
I wasn t getting out.
2
SPEAKER_00
So, and that s when I started developing panic attacks because, uh,
2
SPEAKER_00
Like if you spend like six months in the same room, and then a year in the same room, and a year and a half, and two years, and now it s been three years I ve been in my living room.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so now like things get, things get like, it s like the world has shrunk, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
And everything that s outside of my living room is like, it s aggressing me, you know?
2
SPEAKER_01
What kinds of things are aggressing you?
2
SPEAKER_00
like everything that can be like uh everything that is like stimulating like birds chirping or uh like you know it s no it snowed last week here like a shit shit on the snow and they had to uh plow it away and like every sound and every you know
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, yeah, I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, everything that I cannot control, everything that I cannot control is aggressing.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I think that s that s that s that s that thing.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, sure.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
You got into the world.
2
SPEAKER_01
The birds are chirping.
2
SPEAKER_01
There s fucking noises and people talking.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s it s annoying.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s annoying being outside.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
And my place is like super calm.
2
SPEAKER_01
So you also but you mentioned in the text also that in okay So let your story as it stands to me is you were working selling alcohol for the government in Canada because they have weird laws This put you in a position where there was just a bunch of fucking crazy people around you all the time This drove you kind of insane and because it drove you insane you were able to collect a bunch of money on insurance And with that money you ve been able to stay home for three years and you mentioned in the text I believe you said that you haven t left the house in like
2
SPEAKER_01
Two or three years, is that correct?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, almost.
2
SPEAKER_00
I go out maybe once every two or three weeks.
2
SPEAKER_00
Sometimes I go to the corner store to buy some rolling papers, but that s about it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I used to smoke a lot of cigarettes when I first went into depression.
2
SPEAKER_00
I hadn t smoked for like 10 years and I started smoking again.
2
SPEAKER_00
Of course, you know, because you re on depression, so might as well fucking smoke.
2
SPEAKER_01
tobacco and Are you um, would you consider yourself agoraphobic?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah Okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, my doctor my doctor also spoke to me about having problems with this and spoke I Spoke about it with my I ve actually been referred to a psychiatrist.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna see one in the
2
SPEAKER_00
January.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s going to be like the second time I see one.
2
SPEAKER_00
First time I saw one, he just like told me like, well, you got depression, so take care of your depression and come back to see me.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I thought it was a bit like rough from this part there, but he was right.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know, might as well
2
SPEAKER_00
take care of one sickness and the rest.
2
SPEAKER_01
So let s get into it for a little bit.
2
SPEAKER_01
For these three years that you ve just been at home and you haven t been working, do you live alone?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
What have you been doing for these three years, man?
2
SPEAKER_00
I taught myself how to program.
2
SPEAKER_00
How to code.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
Cool.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s the only thing, for the first six months I did nothing.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like I stared at my ceiling.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I did, for, for a year and a half, I mean, I couldn t get out of my apartment because I would get like too tired, you know, I couldn t get into my, um,
2
SPEAKER_00
like walk from my kitchen to my living room and I would be like exhausted just by doing this you know because I was so not doing nothing so this also this also helped into the anxiety and feeling unsafe outside you know but uh yeah that s mostly what I did for three years I just like plugged myself on the computer and I didn t get out of my house and I you know you know what what I like I I ve only just like I ve known Twitch
2
SPEAKER_00
but I ve only started watching Twitch for like a month.
2
SPEAKER_01
So, Ben, what have you been like, are you able to like, what have you been programming?
2
SPEAKER_01
What have you been coding?
2
SPEAKER_01
What have you been making with this new skill that you learned?
2
SPEAKER_00
I code in like, you know, I don t like programming languages, but I code in C. So I taught myself how to code in C, so it s like pretty low level stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, you know, whatever, like, I had some, like, little gigs left and right, like on Fiverr and Upwork and these kinds of stuff, because I can do web also.
2
SPEAKER_00
But for, like, the thing I like the most is C programming, you know, because it s low-level stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
So it s like, I program, like, it s mostly for my portfolio, like, so I can get a job maybe in that area instead of working where I like, because I fucking hate my job.
2
SPEAKER_00
So yeah, so I ve been mostly programming like stuff like, you know, memory management stuff and like file systems and mini OS operating systems.
2
SPEAKER_00
So, you know, like, like low stuff, low level stuff.
2
SPEAKER_01
Ben, do you, do you, do you, do you get lonely at all in just being at your house and not, not talking to anyone?
2
SPEAKER_00
I speak to people like every day, but like only on the internet or on the,
2
SPEAKER_00
I am.
2
SPEAKER_00
I am fucking lonely.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, there is a problem you have.
2
SPEAKER_01
You have you have like Internet friends.
2
SPEAKER_00
Not that real friends.
2
SPEAKER_00
But you speak to them.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
Actual real friends that I do see.
2
SPEAKER_00
But I speak most of my interactions with them are still on the Internet because
3
SPEAKER_01
It s, you know, it s everyday living, but they actually live in Montreal.
3
SPEAKER_01
They live like two streets away from New York.
3
SPEAKER_01
So we do, I do see people once in a blue moon, but I mostly speak to them on the, but, but you still do get lonely though.
3
SPEAKER_01
Cause it s, it s not the same.
3
SPEAKER_01
And there, there is a, a loneliness problem with I don t know, North American men for sure.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I know what there is.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
So you also said in the text that you re going back to work on January.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
In person at the liquor store.
3
SPEAKER_01
Fuck, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
How do you feel?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I m freaking out.
3
SPEAKER_00
So here s the thing though is so I know you re freaking out, but um while a couple things And I m just like just totally like practical shit is like you ve been spending the past three years You re smart.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re really smart you spent these past three years Not you didn t just sit around and jack off all day.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I m sure you did a little bit, but you learned You know what?
3
SPEAKER_00
Hold on, don t tell me what you re about to tell me just yet.
3
SPEAKER_00
Hey, what were we gonna say?
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, the thing is that I just want to say something about depression and taking antidepressants, you know, because I took a lot of them.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m still taking a shitload of them.
3
SPEAKER_00
Are you about to say that they make your dick not work?
3
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no, no, no.
3
SPEAKER_00
At first, it fucking worked.
3
SPEAKER_01
It works.
3
SPEAKER_01
But you fucking can t cum.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like, you don t get to the end.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, you just fucking can t get to the orgasm, so... So it s very possible that you were just... Yeah, it s very possible that you were just, uh, in the same masturbation session for three years, and then eventually, you know, you just cum a whole bathtub at the end, but...
3
SPEAKER_00
But what I was going to say, what I was going to say is, you know, you were smart.
3
SPEAKER_00
You learned a skill over the past three years.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so, um, you know, my, my friend, I, I wonder why is it that you are, why have you resigned yourself to, okay, I now have to go back to this fucking horrible job as if, as if, um, A, as if there s only one job available for you to do in the entire, you know,
3
SPEAKER_00
country of Canada, and then B, as if you didn t just spend a whole bunch of time learning a new marketable skill.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, why have you put yourself in this box where the only thing for you to do to make money now is this horrible job that you hate?
3
SPEAKER_01
I know.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think it s because, like, when I look at it from the outside, it makes absolute sense for me to
3
SPEAKER_01
see what path I should take and like most probably will succeed in but to actually do it or to act like everything is still uh creating yeah like everything is still um creating a lot of anxiety in me so yeah yeah that s the main that s the main main thing and uh
3
SPEAKER_01
I need to fucking take a shitload of Xanax just so I don t freak out most of the time, so at least it s my government gem, you know?
3
SPEAKER_01
I can be Xanax out of my head and scan bottles at the cash, you know?
3
SPEAKER_01
and ask for $20 and just give the fucking money back.
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s a basic job.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let me ask you another thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
Let me ask you another thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
Through your insurance, over the past three years, have you been able to talk to a therapist?
3
SPEAKER_00
You said you spoke to a doctor who told you about your phobia.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I ve been seeing a psychologist for four years.
3
SPEAKER_00
Tell me, I m curious, I want to know, what are some things that the psychologist has told you?
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, we spent a shitload of time in like,
3
SPEAKER_01
My childhood, I had, uh, uh, you know, uh, Tourette s syndrome.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Tourette s syndrome.
3
SPEAKER_00
By the way, a very, uh, it s almost apt for you because Tourette s sounds like a very French.
3
SPEAKER_00
It sounds like a French.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was going to say Tourette, but you know, I said it in English just because it sounds so cooler.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s, that s the main reason.
3
SPEAKER_00
So what is your what is your what is your psychologist told you that has been helpful for you?
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s been helpful I Don t know man, because we ve only been exploring like deep in my past but like She hadn t really told me anything that much about like actual daily life
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like actual... Yeah, dude, I fucking hate them.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, I know what you mean.
3
SPEAKER_00
I fucking hate, like, I ve been, you know, like I fucking hate in therapy where they re like, tell me about when you were eight years old.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m like, first of all, I don t remember.
3
SPEAKER_00
And second of all, I m a hundred, whatever.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
Look, I know I m not a real therapist.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I didn t read any of the books or whatever, but I m like a hundred percent sure that nothing happened to me when I was eight.
3
SPEAKER_00
That is the reason why I am.
3
SPEAKER_00
you know, I m addicted to candy or whatever the fuck, but I m also probably wrong and stupid, but, but, um, but no, I understand your frustration about that.
3
SPEAKER_00
So, so, okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
So nobody, nobody, no, no psychologist.
3
SPEAKER_00
So, so no, no psychologist, no doctor.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, what about the doctor?
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, has any, has any mental health or physical health professional given you any tips or positive ways forward to deal with the things that you re dealing with?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I got a doctor and he prescribed me pills.
3
SPEAKER_01
So it s pills and therapy with a psychologist, but that s mainly, you know, they say you get access to like psychology resources and all this, but like, it s hard to actually get good psychology treatments.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like, sometimes you,
3
SPEAKER_01
you feel like they don t even know what to fucking do with you.
3
SPEAKER_01
So like, like, like, like the woman, a woman called me this week, like for an interview, like none of the interview, like there s like a screening call before the psychiatrist.
3
SPEAKER_01
And she asked me like, a bunch of question.
3
SPEAKER_01
And like, she asked me what, what I what I m expecting out of the psychiatrist, you know,
3
SPEAKER_01
Like how am I fucking supposed to know what to expect from the psychiatrist?
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean Hold on I think that s a legitimate question.
3
SPEAKER_00
What are you expecting out of a psychiatrist?
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, I answered well, I just wish wishes like I just wish she opens up my head and Repairs it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s what I pulled her.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but I don t know what I just just fucking I
3
SPEAKER_01
crack me open and fix it up, you know?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, a hundred percent.
3
SPEAKER_01
But I couldn t, I know it s like a shitty answer, but I mean, I have no words.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t think that s a shitty answer.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think, I mean, look, people go to school and the job exists to do that, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
The job exists because people have fucking issues and they got to go to a person to help them with the fucking issues.
3
SPEAKER_00
So, okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
And this was the previous intake.
3
SPEAKER_00
So did you go to see the psychiatrist?
3
SPEAKER_01
No, no, well, I m going to see it in January most probably.
3
SPEAKER_01
She told me it s going to take like three or four weeks.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, I m not a real thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m a fucking douche in a shitty costume that I ve been farting on the phone.
3
SPEAKER_00
But I want to say I want to reiterate what I was saying to you.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I understand that, like, you know, you have a you re just going through this shit that makes it hard to, like, take action and not like it catastrophize everything that s going on with you in your life.
3
SPEAKER_00
But I really do like from an outside if it s if it s meaningful to you at all from an outsider perspective I think what you did was really smart you learned a skill that you can now use to go apply I m sure that you have a computer screen with like 15 different fucking monitors on it that you can do a whole bunch of jobs from so why don t you go on the internet and find
3
SPEAKER_00
Jobs or or you know, I know you talked about fiverr you talked about up work.
3
SPEAKER_00
Those are all great things I m sure you made a profile and you did this and you offered Whatever services that you can provide with the knowledge that you learned over the past three years But like why don t you go within your means of whatever you can do while while?
3
SPEAKER_00
Navigating whatever is going on with your mental health right now like see
4
SPEAKER_00
what options out there exist for you in the world before, you know, succumbing to this, this defeat that the only thing that you can ever do with your life ever is get, you know, yelled at by drunk French Canadian people.
4
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Thanks for your advice, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, good.
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you, does that, do you feel, how do you feel about everything I just said?
4
SPEAKER_01
I feel, uh, I feel fine.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
OK, good.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, thanks, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
Thanks.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no, but of course, it makes sense what you were saying.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I mean, it s not something that s like, yeah, it s good to you know, when because when you speak, when you feel like when you say things like they make sense as you say them sometimes.
4
SPEAKER_01
So just like just talking with you, like I realized something.
4
SPEAKER_01
So.
4
SPEAKER_00
OK, good.
4
SPEAKER_01
Thanks, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
But you know what?
4
SPEAKER_01
It s the first time I call.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I ve known you for only two or three weeks, but I watch your show every time I can, and you re fucking great.
4
SPEAKER_01
You re an inspiration, actually.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thanks, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I want to say...
4
SPEAKER_01
I m going to call you back, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m going to take you back once... Okay, good.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m down for a follow-up.
4
SPEAKER_00
If you find another job or something happens... Yeah, that s it.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you call me back.
4
SPEAKER_00
Let s talk.
4
SPEAKER_00
I want to know if there s an update.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
Perfect, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
Have a nice evening.
4
SPEAKER_01
Thanks.
4
SPEAKER_00
Ben, is there anything else?
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people looking for you before we go?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
4
SPEAKER_00
Nothing else.
4
SPEAKER_00
Take care.
4
SPEAKER_00
All right.
4
SPEAKER_01
All right.
4
SPEAKER_01
Take care, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
Just be careful, you know.
4
SPEAKER_01
God, you know, maybe it doesn t exist.
4
SPEAKER_01
Who knows?
4
SPEAKER_01
That s it.
4
SPEAKER_00
All right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Take care, Ben.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
4
SPEAKER_01
Bye.
4
SPEAKER_00
I got to go to Montreal at some point.
4
SPEAKER_00
So wait, the government runs liquor stores.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s kind of interesting.
4
SPEAKER_00
I liked Ben.
4
SPEAKER_00
He was a cool guy.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_00
I, um.
4
SPEAKER_00
He s smart though, like I said, he s smart because I ve talked to, we ve talked to like, you know, mildly agoraphobic people on the, um, on the podcast before.
4
SPEAKER_00
And like, obviously people in like crazy, like depressive episodes.
4
SPEAKER_00
And, um, you know, look for me when I m in a crazy depressive episode, I don t, uh, learn how to code.
4
SPEAKER_00
I, you know, uh,
4
SPEAKER_00
Go insane.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t do anything productive, but he did something productive with his crazy time.
4
SPEAKER_00
He turned crazy time into crunch time.
4
SPEAKER_00
That was smart.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I hope it pays off for him.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hello.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s up, man?
4
SPEAKER_02
What s up?
4
SPEAKER_00
Is this a Scooby?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yes, sir.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s going on, Scooby?
4
SPEAKER_00
How can I help you today?
4
SPEAKER_02
Uh, nothing much, man.
4
SPEAKER_02
I was gonna talk about my experience in, uh, foster care for the past 10 years.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, how old are you now?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, 18.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you got put there when you were eight?
4
SPEAKER_02
Uh, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Go ahead.
4
SPEAKER_00
Start, start wherever you want to start.
4
SPEAKER_02
All right.
4
SPEAKER_02
So pretty much, um, I used to live with my dad and, uh, he used to get into arguments and shit with my step mom.
4
SPEAKER_02
Then I think Child Protective Services came in the picture, do like welfare checks.
4
SPEAKER_02
They came up to my dad while he was smoking a joint.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then, um, fucking, they took me to my grandparents crib and they took me to a shelter.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I started going to group homes and threw up those.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s when I started getting arrested and shit, hanging out with the wrong crowd.
4
SPEAKER_02
Got introduced into some fucked up drugs and shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
Kind of fucked me over in the long run.
4
SPEAKER_00
So they took you away from your parents when you were eight because your dad was smoking a joint or was it a bunch of other stuff?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it was mainly because of arguments and shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
It wasn t like a household for her child.
4
SPEAKER_02
But the joint really added the cherry on top when they showed up.
4
SPEAKER_00
Did you feel that way?
4
SPEAKER_00
Did you feel like it was a bad environment for you?
4
SPEAKER_02
Not really.
4
SPEAKER_02
But like nowadays, I don t really be talking to my dad.
4
SPEAKER_02
Cause you know, every time I like I see him, it s always like an argument or I ended up getting arrested due to him like trying to aggravate me and just trying to fuck me.
4
SPEAKER_00
So where are you at now?
4
SPEAKER_02
Uh, stayed up by FIBA.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I was temporarily, uh, I had a court order recently, like a month ago.
4
SPEAKER_02
I have to go to rehab.
4
SPEAKER_02
for 60 days.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I m going there on Monday.
4
SPEAKER_00
All right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, now you said that you were into like drugs and doing all this, uh, other kind of stuff.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is that something you re still into?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, honestly, I stopped all the hardcore shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
I ve just been doing like shrooms and like tree recently.
4
SPEAKER_00
All right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, are you going to go to college?
4
SPEAKER_02
Uh, yeah, actually.
4
SPEAKER_02
Um,
4
SPEAKER_02
I just gotta get my GED and then the foster care system pays for my college till I m 28.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s dope.
4
SPEAKER_02
They pay for the dormitory, they pay for everything.
4
SPEAKER_02
And they pay me to go to school too.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I don t have to pay shit, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s all free.
4
SPEAKER_00
Damn, there s definitely some 17-year-olds who are about to call.
4
SPEAKER_00
There s definitely some 17-year-olds that are about to listen to this podcast and call social services on their parents.
4
SPEAKER_02
For sure.
4
SPEAKER_00
What are you going to study?
4
SPEAKER_02
Most likely computer engineering, but what I really want to do first is get some trades in like HVAC, electrical, plumbing, welding.
4
SPEAKER_02
I can get that shit for free too.
4
SPEAKER_02
So if I don t succeed in college, I also have that to fall back on.
4
SPEAKER_02
And to get my certifications.
4
SPEAKER_00
Are you excited?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, not really.
4
SPEAKER_02
Cause I have like severe social anxiety.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t like talking to people like that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Why do you, why do you not like talking to people?
4
SPEAKER_02
Due to like trauma and stuff, like when I was a kid, when I was young, like maybe 10 years old in a group home, like anytime I ll come out, cause it was like predominantly like, you know, black kids, staff is black, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_02
I was like the only white boy.
4
SPEAKER_02
And my anytime I spoke, it would just be racial towards me, calling me like a cracker, all that shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I just didn t really, you know, talk to people.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, do you have any friends right now?
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
I have one good friend of mine that I ve been hanging out with since middle school.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Are you, are you, um, are you close with him still?
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh yeah, for sure.
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, we started talking a lot more after, uh, our good friend passed away a couple of years ago.
4
SPEAKER_02
And, uh, we met up at his funeral and started talking again.
4
SPEAKER_02
We ll get together and then yeah, still talking to this day.
4
SPEAKER_02
We look out for each other and shit.
4
SPEAKER_00
So, do you, like now, are you feeling anxiety about like going into a classroom setting and going to, you re going to like traditional college, you re gonna go to like a university where you ll be in a dorm.
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I m doing,
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, no.
4
SPEAKER_02
So what I m doing is, uh, I live in South Florida.
4
SPEAKER_02
There s a place called Broward college, like a little community college.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m gonna go there for two years.
4
SPEAKER_02
So that s like my gateway to go to FSU, uh, Florida state.
4
SPEAKER_00
Rad dude.
4
SPEAKER_00
Rad.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m trying to think about anything that, well, I mean, let s think, I ll think with you.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything that you think would help you get over your social anxiety?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um,
4
SPEAKER_02
I really don t know because I haven t really tried anything.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I think smoking pot doesn t really help either.
4
SPEAKER_00
But here s the thing, both ends of the spectrum I don t think are good, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Because for me and for a lot of other people, when you smoke a bunch of weed, you get in your head.
4
SPEAKER_00
And that s the worst position to be socializing from, because you re overthinking everything you re saying, you re overthinking everything the other person is saying, you re not being yourself, you re paranoid, you re shy, it s just not good.
4
SPEAKER_00
but even if you were to tell me that but if you were to tell me the opposite even if you were to tell me that we d made you feel more sociable
5
SPEAKER_00
and loose and whatever, that would still be bad because then you would, you know, develop some kind of system where like, oh, I have to get high in order to talk to people, and that s not good either.
5
SPEAKER_00
So, um... Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
You know, I-I-I... I mean, I ve noticed... I ve noticed that, um, when I do, like, mushrooms and shit, like, it helps me, uh, like, not feel weird.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, it makes me... I don t know, it makes me happy and joyful.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, I can actually talk to somebody without being worried about them judging me and shit.
5
SPEAKER_00
How often are you doing mushrooms?
5
SPEAKER_02
Um, I micro dose like once every two or three days.
5
SPEAKER_02
So I m just getting back, you know, into the hang of that shit.
5
SPEAKER_02
So not sure how to do it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Um, so I, I assume you ve been going to, well, you re going to get a rehab for 60 days.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I m gonna go there for 60 days starting Monday.
5
SPEAKER_02
So I will be out in March.
5
SPEAKER_00
All right, cool.
5
SPEAKER_00
How are you feeling about that?
5
SPEAKER_02
I m feeling kind of good.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I told my friends and shit that I talked to still.
5
SPEAKER_02
I m, you know, about to do my plan is and I told him when I get out, I m planning on being sober.
5
SPEAKER_02
Hopefully, I m not addicted to vapes no more.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I don t, you know, smoke weed no more.
5
SPEAKER_00
Cool.
5
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_02
Live the sober life.
5
SPEAKER_00
Cool, man.
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, good on you.
5
SPEAKER_00
You seem like you have a really great perspective of all these things.
5
SPEAKER_00
It sounds like you didn t have, like, the best positions growing up, but you re making a lot of it.
5
SPEAKER_02
For sure, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Child Protective Services really fucked up my childhood, but I made the best of it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Child Protective Services fucked up your childhood?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s when they- Are you more mad at them than at your parents?
5
SPEAKER_02
Uh, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, no kid wants to- Even though I had a shitty household, I didn t want to get taken away from my dad, because still, that is my father.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s my blood.
5
SPEAKER_02
I don t want to, like, you know, be raised without him.
5
SPEAKER_02
But, um, yeah, no, I didn t live with my family.
5
SPEAKER_02
I was- I only got to visit them once every week, every two weeks, if I m lucky.
5
SPEAKER_02
for like an hour per visitation.
5
SPEAKER_02
And that was, yeah, that was eight.
5
SPEAKER_00
You told me this already, but I was thinking about something else.
5
SPEAKER_00
What are you studying?
5
SPEAKER_02
Or what do you hope to do?
5
SPEAKER_02
Computer engineering, and for my HVAC,
5
SPEAKER_02
electrical, AC, and plumbing.
5
SPEAKER_02
And maybe some welding.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s sick.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s some good, I like that.
5
SPEAKER_00
I like anything where you go to school.
5
SPEAKER_00
Like if someone s gonna pay for you to go to school, please dear God, do something real.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh yeah, I m taking advantage of that shit.
5
SPEAKER_00
Do something real.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I m not saying, and I ve talked about this on the fucking, on here a billion times.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m not saying that the arts is not real.
5
SPEAKER_00
But like, yeah, but like it s going to college paying a bunch going to college for it is super not real You know, like if you re gonna spend all the time and money and effort to go to college, you know Get it in something you have to go to college for so yeah, you know good on you Oh, yeah, and they also um, they also cover like Apartments like they pay half the rent so like I ll say like if like 1300 I ll pay like 400 for rent
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, how do they, what s the whole deal?
5
SPEAKER_00
Is the foster system, is that like a public tax funded thing?
5
SPEAKER_02
I think so.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I don t really know.
5
SPEAKER_02
I know the, they give you benefits for, you know, putting into a whole bunch of bullshit through childhood to 18.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s like the way of saying, Hey, Hey, we re sorry.
5
SPEAKER_02
Here s a, uh, here s your own crib.
5
SPEAKER_02
You get to go to school for free if you really want to, you know, all these, uh, free services and shit.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_02
And, and,
5
SPEAKER_02
Even if you don t go to school, they give you like almost a $1,500 a month just because you were in foster care all those years.
5
SPEAKER_02
It s crazy.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s great.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s great, man.
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, you know, what s your name again?
5
SPEAKER_00
Hold on.
5
SPEAKER_00
Don t tell me.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m going to remember it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Ah, fuck.
5
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again?
5
SPEAKER_02
Scooby.
5
SPEAKER_00
Scooby.
5
SPEAKER_00
OK.
5
SPEAKER_00
I feel like I should have remembered that.
5
SPEAKER_00
Where d you get the name Scooby from?
5
SPEAKER_02
I liked watching Scooby-Doo growing up and I was like my discord name and my fucking all my online games growing up.
5
SPEAKER_00
Is your friend named Shaggy?
5
SPEAKER_02
I had a friend named Shaggy.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he changed his username to that.
5
SPEAKER_02
For Call of Duty memes and shit.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m not worried about you, Scooby.
5
SPEAKER_00
I think you re gonna do well.
5
SPEAKER_00
You got a good head on your shoulders.
5
SPEAKER_00
Keep doing what you re doing and trying to stay sober and trying to live life well.
5
SPEAKER_01
For sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
5
SPEAKER_02
I hope all y all have a good day or good night.
5
SPEAKER_02
Sleep well.
5
SPEAKER_00
Gek bless you.
5
SPEAKER_02
Alright, man.
5
SPEAKER_02
Have a great day.
5
SPEAKER_00
Take care, man.
5
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
I liked Scooby.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was thinking, when we were on the phone, I was like, am I?
5
SPEAKER_00
And I m too deep in the game for these questions.
5
SPEAKER_00
Or maybe I m not, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
But I m talking to Scooby and I m like, am I?
5
SPEAKER_00
Is it bad that I just pretend to be a therapist, that we re doing fake therapy stuff?
5
SPEAKER_00
And I think about it.
5
SPEAKER_00
But I liked talking to Scooby, that was an engaging conversation.
5
SPEAKER_00
It felt helpful for everyone involved.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, I enjoyed that fake therapy session.
5
SPEAKER_00
So, whatever, I ll keep doing fake therapy until, you know, something really bad happens.
5
SPEAKER_00
All right, thank you for calling Scooby.
5
SPEAKER_01
He s teaching you how to live your life But he s not really an expert