0
SPEAKER_00
Hey man, what s your name?
0
SPEAKER_00
Hey man, what s going on?
0
SPEAKER_00
Uh, let s go, let s go Papa John, cause that s where I m at right now.
0
SPEAKER_00
Let s go Papa John.
0
SPEAKER_01
Papa John, what s going on with you?
0
SPEAKER_00
Uh, nothing much, man.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m just at work right now, you know.
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, not getting any tips.
0
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what s going on with people tonight, but yeah, man.
0
SPEAKER_01
So what d you want to talk about today, Papa John?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I just wanted to talk about, um, so I have a girlfriend of about four years now.
0
SPEAKER_00
And oh my fuck, this is going to sound so bad saying this, but, um, I just can t stop, uh, like cheating.
0
SPEAKER_00
I can t stop cheating.
0
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
It says here, you said, uh, I can t stop cheating on my girlfriend.
0
SPEAKER_01
And I think it s my dad s fault because he fucks hookers.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s what, um, let me listen to your, a lot of your podcasts.
0
SPEAKER_00
I d like ask myself the same question.
0
SPEAKER_00
Josh, you listen, I think I ve, uh, boiled it.
0
SPEAKER_00
Boiled it down to that, I think.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um... Okay, so... But here s the thing, how can- how- Why do you- Why do you say that you cheating on your girlfriend is your dad s fault?
0
SPEAKER_00
Hmm... Well, okay, so... So my dad fucks hookers, and he s- he s still with my mom.
0
SPEAKER_00
They re like, together, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
We all live together.
0
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
0
SPEAKER_00
And it s kinda weird, me and him never really had a relationship, so...
0
SPEAKER_00
I guess to relate with me.
0
SPEAKER_00
He talked about having sex with with girls younger than him like my age like as a form of bonding, but I m like bro like With my mom dude, but anyway Yeah, so I think he growing up.
0
SPEAKER_00
He just always talked so much shit about being in a relationship and like I don t know like having a female companion that can you have obligations towards
0
SPEAKER_00
Know what I mean?
0
SPEAKER_01
How old are you, Papa John?
0
SPEAKER_01
I am 20.
0
SPEAKER_01
You re 20?
0
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, Papa John, here s the thing.
0
SPEAKER_01
I ve been thinking about this a lot because, you know, I ve been thinking about my parents and I ve been thinking about, you know, things in my life that I don t like about myself and how or, you know, like, why am I the way I am?
0
SPEAKER_01
And I look at my parents and I think about their lives and their situations.
0
SPEAKER_01
And it is, it s informative, right?
0
SPEAKER_01
Looking at your parents is a good way to inform you of how you got to be where you are.
0
SPEAKER_01
But here s the kicker, and here s the thing, and it actually can be helpful, because like, here s the thing, you saying, I m cheating on my girlfriend and it s my dad s fault, is this way of like, alleviating responsibility for your actions and putting it on your dad.
0
SPEAKER_01
Now here s the thing, and here s the thing though, here s the thing.
0
SPEAKER_01
It actually is like helpful.
0
SPEAKER_01
to use your parents, and think about your relationships with your parents, think about your upbringing, to understand why you are the way you are, and go into your head and be like, okay, it s not my fault, necessarily, that my brain has been programmed to be more inclined to act certain ways, or do certain things, but,
0
SPEAKER_01
It is your responsibility to fix it.
0
SPEAKER_01
Do you know what I m saying?
0
SPEAKER_01
So, so the way you re right.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
The fact that your brain, I mean, I mean there s, you know, you might be, you re, it sounds like you re a sex addict.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t want, I m not going to put that on you, but, but, uh, is that accurate?
0
SPEAKER_00
I guess I have like a, uh, yeah, I guess it, yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
I mean,
0
SPEAKER_01
So, so listen, listen, here s the thing.
0
SPEAKER_01
Your compulsions and the ways that you view real relationships and whatnot, they re totally, yes, of course they re informed pretty significantly by your parents, but that, but it s still your responsibility to, you know,
0
SPEAKER_01
to handle it, right?
0
SPEAKER_01
To do well by your girlfriend by not cheating on her, to just realize that you can t really be in a healthy relationship with somebody until you focus on fixing these things that are wrong with you.
0
SPEAKER_01
Okay, you can t you can t so you can so you can you can it s helpful so you can think about oh my dad would fuck hookers and Talk to me about about it and cheated on my mom and that set a really bad example for me and you can go okay, and you can use that as part of why as part of your Understanding and fixing the way that you are but you can t use it as an excuse you can t use it as a deflection like you know at the end of the day like you know
0
SPEAKER_01
We live our lives, we have our things about ourselves that we need to fix and deal with, and the first step in doing it is to take a responsibility and go,
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I have like fucked up sexual compulsions that I need to, uh, you know, deal with.
0
SPEAKER_01
And in the meantime, I don t want to, I don t want to hurt this other person that I care about.
0
SPEAKER_01
So I m going to, um, not be in a relationship with them.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m not going to cause more pain.
0
SPEAKER_00
Uh, because I guess that s what my, I guess that s what like, I really wanted to ask you was, so she, she s aware of like,
0
SPEAKER_00
I d say probably like six times, six different instances.
0
SPEAKER_00
So I guess my question is like, is this just too, cause I don t know, this is going to sound weird to people listening, but I think I do love her.
0
SPEAKER_00
Like I do love her.
0
SPEAKER_00
I think I do.
0
SPEAKER_00
Well, I do, I guess I do, but so ideally in like a perfect world, I would be with her and not fuck prostitutes or girls like my dad, you know?
0
SPEAKER_00
So,
0
SPEAKER_00
So I guess my question is, should I, is this just, should I just like, just kind of tell her about what I m dealing with and just end it?
0
SPEAKER_00
Because I feel like the fact that I know she, she knows about so much and she s still here, I feel like it kind of, you know, like, I know I m a shitty person saying this and I talk to my friends about it all the time.
0
SPEAKER_00
And actually we re technically on like a break right now, like a week break or so.
0
SPEAKER_01
Listen, I feel bad saying this because I say all the time I don t like to tell people what to do and then you could probably find me saying that and then put a clip compilation of about a hundred times that I ve told people what to do.
0
SPEAKER_01
But look, here s my opinion.
0
SPEAKER_01
It sounds to me from what you are telling me that you are not ready.
0
SPEAKER_00
No.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, no.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t think so.
0
SPEAKER_01
And if you really do love this girl, then you don t want to hurt her and you don t want to put her in a fucked up, you know, so you don t want to put her through emotional pain.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I guess I know what I need to do for a while, I just...
0
SPEAKER_01
yeah yeah because and this this girl i mean she sounds sweet as hell that she uh hasn t kicked your fucking ass yet after after knowing about all this yeah no definitely i mean well i mean it s gone there but you know what i mean but yeah um how old is she um 19 gonna turn 20
0
SPEAKER_01
All right, um, cause yeah, I mean, she doesn t deserve like all this, all this bullshit.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, and like, that s another, that s sort of another part.
0
SPEAKER_01
And I know it s hard, but it s sort of another part of the taking responsibility thing is to be like, um,
0
SPEAKER_01
I gotta fix, I gotta prioritize fixing what s fucked up about me.
0
SPEAKER_01
You know?
0
SPEAKER_01
And also you need to reframe it because to say it s your dad s fault is not, is a bad framing.
0
SPEAKER_01
You understand that, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
I do understand.
0
SPEAKER_00
So, should I try to like abstain then?
0
SPEAKER_00
Or stop having sex?
0
SPEAKER_00
From sex?
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you re asking me how to solve this issue.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, no.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m asking you should I?
0
SPEAKER_00
cuz should you should you should you stop cheating on your girlfriend yes yes but after okay so after that s dealt with and uh with how i think most people would see fit um well okay what then after that
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
What then?
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, what then?
1
SPEAKER_00
Uh, well, if I were you, um, I would go to therapy.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s probably a good idea.
1
SPEAKER_00
Go see a real therapist and, um,
1
SPEAKER_00
you see you understand why you okay so that s the thing right is you your dad was fucked up and you understand why you have these weird fucked up compulsions and bad views on sex relationships and then how you unlearn them that s a good that s a good question I don t know I bet a therapist could help you do that better than I could but I will say I think that it s better it s a good idea for you to to
1
SPEAKER_00
not be in a relationship until you figure these issues out.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I agree, too.
1
SPEAKER_01
I agree, Guk.
1
SPEAKER_00
Papa, well, I m gonna let you go get back to work.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yep, yep.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s actually perfect timing.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s at 11 minutes right now, so I think we ll be good.
1
SPEAKER_00
Cool.
1
SPEAKER_00
Anything else you want to... You sound like you have a band you want to plug.
1
SPEAKER_00
You want to plug a band?
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, listen, been listening to a lot of title fight recently.
1
SPEAKER_01
So.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what that is.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m not going to check it out, but I m glad that you, I m glad you got to do a plug.
1
SPEAKER_00
Thanks.
1
SPEAKER_00
Take care, man.
1
SPEAKER_01
You too.
1
SPEAKER_01
Love you.
1
SPEAKER_02
Hello.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hi there.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s your name?
1
SPEAKER_00
John, well, John, good to good to hear from you.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s up?
1
SPEAKER_00
How s life?
1
SPEAKER_00
How can I get you to live?
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, so pretty much, uh, my life has been crazy for the past year.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, long story short, I paid my rent this month and all my other bills are unpaid and I door dash.
1
SPEAKER_02
Now I m a veteran.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was in the army for three years and
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
And my car has major problems.
1
SPEAKER_02
My tax expired since November.
1
SPEAKER_02
My car insurance, not, it s not existent anymore.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I have a broken engine mount for like three months now.
1
SPEAKER_02
So like I m in a bad position.
1
SPEAKER_02
I have a little two year old.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m staying strong for that little man, you know?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
That sucks.
1
SPEAKER_02
It does suck, I know.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s just so good to get it out.
1
SPEAKER_02
No, I mean, shit, it s real.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, um... Well, okay, let me say this to you, just at the beginning, just so that I don t waste any of your time.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is there a particular way that you would like me to assist you?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, is there a particular aspect of anything that you want to talk through?
1
SPEAKER_00
Or that you want the perspective of a lizard who doesn t know you?
1
SPEAKER_00
Or anything like that?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, how can I best be of gecko service to you on this phone call?
1
SPEAKER_02
Honestly, I just I really wanted to vent and I ve been watching you live stream for like a very long time and you re just positive and I I Appreciate you listening to me.
1
SPEAKER_02
You know, I don t expect anything out of anybody.
1
SPEAKER_00
I just wanted to get it out What what what what branch of the army or or I guess is the army is a branch, right?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I was a military police officer.
1
SPEAKER_02
I
1
SPEAKER_00
And do they, do you get any money from that?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, do they give you money for being a veteran?
1
SPEAKER_02
Uh, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
So I got out for it with PTSD.
1
SPEAKER_02
So I get 1500 a month, but I, um, that s not enough to pay my whole rent.
1
SPEAKER_02
I live in Florida.
1
SPEAKER_00
So it s expensive before I was going to say nice before you said the PTSD part.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I actually survived a school shooting.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, and
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
Crazy stuff, man.
1
SPEAKER_02
Shit got real.
1
SPEAKER_00
Was it one of the ones that was on the news?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
17 people, February 14th, 2018.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
1
SPEAKER_00
You were at, um.
1
SPEAKER_00
Douglas.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
1
SPEAKER_00
What were you, were you, and you were in high school then?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I was a senior.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my goodness.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, I thought the PTSD is the PTSD from that, or is it from the army?
1
SPEAKER_02
Both.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, I had, uh, PTSD from that first.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I, when I was in service from basic training all, all the way throughout every unit that I was in, I got harassed by my upper class and like my sergeants, my NCOs.
1
SPEAKER_02
And like, they were pretty much like, we would be at a shooting range practicing.
1
SPEAKER_02
Right.
1
SPEAKER_02
That s what I had to do for my MOS, military police.
1
SPEAKER_02
And my sergeant would be like, oh, watch out for that private.
1
SPEAKER_02
He looks like he s not going to aim at the target.
1
SPEAKER_02
Like I was harassed throughout my time in service and made my PTSD worse, I guess.
1
SPEAKER_02
But I m doing well now.
1
SPEAKER_00
Someone, someone take this girl to Disney World, please.
1
SPEAKER_02
Someone take me to Disney.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, I m sorry to hear all that.
1
SPEAKER_00
When did you have your, two years ago?
1
SPEAKER_02
What happened?
1
SPEAKER_00
You had your kid two years ago?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
My son was born August 6th, 2021.
1
SPEAKER_00
And, uh, is dad still around?
1
SPEAKER_02
Uh, no, he s not.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, he lives with his parents.
1
SPEAKER_02
And when we separated, I was going through a really, like, I didn t know where I was going to live.
1
SPEAKER_02
And my brother let me stay in his really expensive studio apartment.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um,
1
SPEAKER_02
And then he ended up moving out and I took over the lease.
1
SPEAKER_02
So it kind of worked out cause I didn t have to pay for staff and security, but like the monthly rent is super, super high, but it was my only option at the time, but we ll make it at work, you know?
1
SPEAKER_00
So, all right.
1
SPEAKER_00
So do you have, are you looking for a job or do you have a job or?
1
SPEAKER_02
I m looking for a job, but it s, it s so hard.
1
SPEAKER_02
Like I have a secret clearance.
1
SPEAKER_02
I have a clean background check.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m like a businesswoman.
1
SPEAKER_02
Social media, marketing, like I m in college to get my bachelor s in business administration.
1
SPEAKER_02
But it s so hard to get a job nowadays.
1
SPEAKER_00
Man, so you re taking care of a kid, you re going to school, and you re trying to work.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
and pay my bills and fix my car.
1
SPEAKER_02
And it s a lot on one person.
1
SPEAKER_00
It sure is.
1
SPEAKER_00
It sure is.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, well, I, I, well, I mean, honestly, the fact that you haven t thrown your hands up in defeat, I commend you for sincerely.
1
SPEAKER_02
The only reason I haven t done that is because I have my little one, Betsy.
1
SPEAKER_02
He s my reason to toughen through the darkest times.
1
You feel me?
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you have family?
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you, like, do you have family in, uh, where you live in Florida?
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
Um, my mom and my brother, um, a little extra twist.
1
SPEAKER_02
Cause why not?
1
SPEAKER_02
I was adopted from birth, so I never met my birth mom or birth dad.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I have 12 siblings that I ve never met.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you, uh, do you desire to meet any of them?
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I ve talked to them, like, you know, like over the phone or a messenger or whatever, but like,
1
SPEAKER_02
I just, I don t have time.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s not like a priority right now, but yeah, you know, sometime in the future.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, do you have friends?
1
SPEAKER_00
I guess I m just asking, do you have, do you have anybody in your life who, who, uh, you know, you can get support from?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I m actually sitting next to one of my best friends.
1
SPEAKER_02
I ve known her for 16 years.
1
SPEAKER_00
Very nice.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, what s her deal?
1
SPEAKER_02
Her deal?
1
SPEAKER_02
Here you go.
1
SPEAKER_01
Hi, Lyle.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m so excited.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, hey, what s up?
1
SPEAKER_00
You sound like a cheerful person.
1
SPEAKER_00
You ve literally spoken a single word, and I m already getting that vibe.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yes.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m a pastry chef.
1
SPEAKER_01
My name s Vanessa.
1
SPEAKER_00
You re a pastry chef named Vanessa?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m imagining strawberry shortcake on the other end of the phone.
1
SPEAKER_01
Pretty much.
1
SPEAKER_01
We ve known each other for 16 years, and it s just been a ride.
1
SPEAKER_00
What s up with you?
1
SPEAKER_00
How s your life going?
1
SPEAKER_01
It s going good.
1
SPEAKER_01
I work at a job.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s been stable.
1
SPEAKER_01
I d like a hotel.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s like a resort.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, I make croissants and bagels every day.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think I m going to become a bagel because I make way too many.
1
SPEAKER_00
You re going to become a bagel.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
My goal in life.
1
SPEAKER_01
Your goal in life?
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh no, my goal in life is to own an edible bakery.
1
SPEAKER_00
Aren t all bakeries theoretically edible?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but with more, like with cannabis, medical.
2
SPEAKER_00
Um... Hmm... Can you get our friend here a job making cakes?
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let s do that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Why don t you guys make cakes together?
2
SPEAKER_00
That could be a cool sitcom.
2
SPEAKER_02
Not would be.
2
SPEAKER_02
We could be like two broke girls, but instead two something.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hmm... How did you and Sky first meet?
2
SPEAKER_02
Elementary school we hated each other.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was really funny, but then we ended up being like we are we re like sisters Now what was it that made you guys realize that you don t hate each other and you actually desire to be best friends for life I?
2
SPEAKER_02
Think it was just it was there s just something about like her and me like I
2
SPEAKER_02
We used to pick on each other for like just dumb little things, but then like one day we looked at each other in the face and like, you re all right.
2
SPEAKER_02
It was kind of funny.
2
SPEAKER_02
It was like a moment.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s nice.
2
SPEAKER_00
Some of the best friendships begin that way of, of, of you just, uh, feeling, thinking the other person sucks or, or like with guys, like they ll, they ll, they ll beat the shit out of each other first and then become best friends.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s pretty much, that was, that was it.
2
SPEAKER_02
She d stick up for me in school and it s really sweet.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s nice.
2
SPEAKER_00
Um, how, what do you, it sounds like she s going through a lot right now and you re, you re there to help her.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s been good.
2
SPEAKER_02
We ve been door dashing, but, um, I like to look at like if the glass is like half empty or half full, I m just happy there s water in a glass.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s my perspective on life.
2
SPEAKER_00
I like that.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s true, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
It s true.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m happy there s water in the glass.
2
SPEAKER_00
Anytime some fucking bullshit is going on, I ll go on YouTube and I ll watch videos of people who have no legs.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I ll be like, alright, at least I have legs.
2
SPEAKER_00
Legs are cool.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s my water.
2
SPEAKER_00
My water is legs.
2
SPEAKER_02
You got her.
2
SPEAKER_00
Can I talk to Sky again?
2
SPEAKER_01
Hello.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hi Skye.
2
SPEAKER_00
Where are you guys right now?
2
SPEAKER_00
Are you at your studio apartment?
2
SPEAKER_01
Uh, no, actually we re parked outside of a Wendy s.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
2
SPEAKER_00
Eating cookies.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well that s nice.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s a great event.
2
SPEAKER_00
And is your, is there a kid there?
2
SPEAKER_00
Where s the kid?
2
SPEAKER_01
Uh, baby daddy has him tonight.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
All right.
2
SPEAKER_00
So you maintain a, a, a, a, a relationship with the baby daddy, but not, uh, uh, you know, you guys aren t dating or friends.
2
SPEAKER_01
No.
2
SPEAKER_01
But everything s good.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s very cordial, thankfully.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there s water.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s water.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s good.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s good.
2
SPEAKER_01
Thank you for hearing me out.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, of course.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let me do this.
2
SPEAKER_00
Does the chat have any questions?
2
SPEAKER_00
Any questions from the chat for these two?
2
SPEAKER_00
Any questions from the chat to John and... John?
2
SPEAKER_00
One person wants to know if you guys are stoned.
2
SPEAKER_01
No.
2
SPEAKER_01
I am.
2
Um...
2
SPEAKER_02
How are you gonna know what the cookie s been through if you ve never been baked?
2
SPEAKER_00
Are you getting any help?
2
SPEAKER_00
Someone wants to know, are you getting any help from like a veteran organization or anything like that?
2
SPEAKER_01
No.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is that a thing you can do?
2
SPEAKER_01
Um, so I ve tried in the past, but it takes like very, very long and they just never got back to me.
2
SPEAKER_01
So there s, everyone thinks that there s so many resources for veterans and like when you go to like a supermarket, it ll be like, oh yeah, donate.
2
SPEAKER_01
your change to the veterans.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, there s really not a lot for us, but it s okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
We re doing amazing.
2
SPEAKER_00
Uh, what are their favorite kind of bagels?
2
SPEAKER_01
What, what, what s your favorite type of bagel?
2
SPEAKER_02
I love a poppy seed bagel.
2
SPEAKER_02
It sounds crazy, but I like how, like, it s not overwhelmed with other flavors.
2
SPEAKER_02
Cause I like to put like flavorful cream cheese on my bagels, like strawberry.
2
SPEAKER_00
All right, we ll take one more.
2
SPEAKER_00
Give us one more question, chat.
2
SPEAKER_00
Give us one more question.
2
SPEAKER_00
Someone wants to ask if you ve thought about putting your baby in a mine to make extra money.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, no, I don t think so.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I don t think that would be a go-to option, but you ll be noted.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know what?
2
SPEAKER_00
You re a good mother, John.
2
SPEAKER_00
If anything, I hope you go to bed tonight knowing that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because you didn t put your child in a mine.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yep.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, we re not doing that.
2
SPEAKER_00
If I had a child and somebody knocked on my door and was like, you could make a lot of money by putting him to work in the mines, he d be in the mines.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, thank you so much.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else either of you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
2
SPEAKER_01
We love you!
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, thanks guys.
2
SPEAKER_01
Stay safe, stay blessed.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m gonna try, I m gonna try.
2
SPEAKER_00
You guys as well, have a good night.
2
SPEAKER_01
You as well, bye.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know what, maybe I ll go into the mines.
2
SPEAKER_00
The mines don t sound that bad!
2
SPEAKER_00
The mines don t sound that bad, I can handle the fucking stupid mines.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hey folks, this is Lyle.
2
SPEAKER_00
I am very excited to announce that I am going back on tour in 2024 to do Therapy Gecko Live all across the country.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you ve never been to one of my live shows before, they re basically like giant group gecko therapy sessions where people from the audience come on stage to talk to a gecko about whatever they want, just like we do right here on the podcast.
2
SPEAKER_00
Plus, I mix in a few stories and presentations and little tidbits from my own life.
2
SPEAKER_00
Tickets are available right now at TherapyGeckoTour.com or you can find the link in the episode description.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m announcing many more cities in the second half of the year, but right now, tickets are on sale for Phoenix, Arizona, Louisville, Kentucky, St.
2
SPEAKER_00
Louis, Missouri, Orlando, Florida, Tampa, Florida, Miami, Florida,
2
SPEAKER_00
Boston, Massachusetts, Denver, Colorado, Syracuse, New York, Albany, New York, Hartford, Connecticut, Las Vegas, Nevada, Salt Lake City, Utah, Nashville, Tennessee, Huntsville, Alabama, Chicago, Illinois, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, San Jose, California, San Francisco, California,
2
SPEAKER_00
Portland, Oregon, and Seattle, Washington.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you can get tickets for all of those cities at therapygeckotour.com.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you didn t hear me say your city, you can still go to the link and hit the RSVP button to get notified for when I do come to your city in the second half of the year.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is my third tour so far, and I think it s gonna be sick.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I hope to see you there.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thanks.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hello?
2
SPEAKER_00
Hi there.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m doing good man.
2
SPEAKER_00
How are you?
2
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna give you a name.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna call you I m gonna call you Jonathan John Jonathan sounds good John All right, you texted me something.
2
SPEAKER_00
I thought it was interesting.
2
SPEAKER_00
You said my name is John.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m 28 I m from Puerto Rico.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is that true?
2
SPEAKER_00
Or is that where you re calling from?
2
SPEAKER_03
No, that is true.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I m here.
2
SPEAKER_03
I m born and raised here.
2
SPEAKER_00
Very cool.
2
SPEAKER_03
Might be one of the few fans you got here, but they re not a lot of us, but you got a few.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, I m about to sound extremely ignorant right now.
2
SPEAKER_00
San Juan is in Puerto Rico, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
That is correct, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, I got Puerto Rico and Costa Rica because they re both reeks.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I got them confused a lot.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I might go to San Juan.
2
SPEAKER_00
I have a little gap in my touring schedule.
2
SPEAKER_00
I might go to San Juan.
2
SPEAKER_00
Please do.
2
SPEAKER_00
Please come.
2
SPEAKER_03
Is that where you are?
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I m in San Juan.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, all right, cool.
2
SPEAKER_00
Maybe you can help me find the best Butterfingers in San Juan, Puerto Rico.
2
SPEAKER_00
You said to me, I recently found out why I cry every time I see a duck.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_03
I know it sounds absurd, but that is correct, Geck.
2
SPEAKER_03
Uh, I mean, may I start the story?
2
SPEAKER_03
Cause this is a wild one.
2
SPEAKER_00
Please.
2
SPEAKER_03
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_03
So I was in the, in one of the hotels we have in San Juan area and I was there and then there, they have this pond with like the koi fish and like ducklings and whatnot.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I started crying and this had happened from like the last 14 years of my life.
2
SPEAKER_03
But for me, it was so
3
SPEAKER_02
always like a happy, like happy tears, like, oh, they re so cute, little ducklings and whatnot.
3
SPEAKER_02
But my mom told me that she was like, oh, haven t you got over that?
3
SPEAKER_02
And I was like, over what?
3
SPEAKER_02
And she was the one that told me and recalled me.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I was like, oh, my God, you re kidding me, mom.
3
SPEAKER_02
That really happened.
3
SPEAKER_02
And it was true.
3
SPEAKER_02
OK, let s go back.
3
SPEAKER_02
When I was about four, my mom got us some ducklings for Easter.
3
SPEAKER_02
And living here in Puerto Rico, especially by that time, I lived in like, it was more in the mountain area.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I didn t have like ponds or anything like natural rivers.
3
SPEAKER_02
And with my little duckling, I wanted him to swim.
3
SPEAKER_02
As a four-year-old, the first place that I thought of was the toilet.
3
SPEAKER_02
And well, you know what happened from here.
3
SPEAKER_01
You flushed the duck down the toilet?
3
SPEAKER_02
In my four-year-old mind, I thought only poop flushed down the toilet.
3
SPEAKER_02
I didn t think other from that.
3
SPEAKER_02
I didn t think that anything else would flush down the toilet.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you thought there was a scanner in there that would reject anything that wasn t shit.
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t know, a mesh filter or something.
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
Man, I mean, I hope this, I hope it doesn t make you feel any better, but I hope it, this might not make you feel better, but that duck died just a horrible death.
3
SPEAKER_01
It died drowning and shit.
3
SPEAKER_02
I really, I really, the thing is, I really hope it was quick, but the saddest part of the story that my mom s recalls, I spent like four days after that feeding him bread through the toilet because I apparently thought he was stuck down the pipes.
3
SPEAKER_02
and still alive.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s actually very sweet of you.
3
SPEAKER_02
I know, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
But also cruel.
3
SPEAKER_02
That s what I told the caller in the text.
3
SPEAKER_02
I was like, it s really like a terrible story, but at the same way, it s like really funny.
3
SPEAKER_02
And as you said, it has a little droplets of wholesome inside of it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Do you, what do you think you can do to repent for this?
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_02
I thought about maybe getting a little duckling for myself.
3
SPEAKER_02
Of course, keeping it away from the toilet, but I, I recently like thought about it and here in Puerto Rico, you have like, it s, it s really easy to get a little duckling for yourself.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I was thinking about getting something for, the thing is I have a Husky.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I don t know how they re going to get along.
3
SPEAKER_01
I mean, that would be horrible if you bought a duck to make up for the one you killed and then it just got killed again by your dog.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s going to maybe maybe it ll be friends like like I m trying.
3
SPEAKER_01
What s the dog like?
3
SPEAKER_01
What s Woodstock?
3
SPEAKER_01
Woodstock is a is he a duck?
3
SPEAKER_01
What the fuck is he?
3
SPEAKER_01
He s a bird.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, is that like that?
3
SPEAKER_02
I think that s a geese.
3
SPEAKER_02
But like the one line.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, the Snoopy and Woodstock, the Charlie Brown guys.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
You mean like, OK, the cartoons.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, sorry.
3
SPEAKER_02
I got a little confused because I know there s geese that s like trending on the web, like online or something.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m sorry.
3
SPEAKER_01
Did you just say that like geese?
3
SPEAKER_01
I m sorry.
3
SPEAKER_01
Did you say that geese are trending on the web?
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, not geese, just one geese that I ve seen like around the Internet, that he s like an indoor geese.
3
SPEAKER_02
And he lives like inside the house and it s like really friendly with like the cats that also lives in that side of the house.
3
SPEAKER_01
Here s what you do.
3
SPEAKER_01
You get a duckling and you raise it to be an internationally famous, uh, uh, social media influencer, brand deals from all kinds of, uh, duck apparel websites.
3
SPEAKER_01
And you just give this duck the most rock star lifestyle it could possibly dream of.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that will make up for drowning the other one in diarrhea.
3
SPEAKER_01
Uh,
3
SPEAKER_02
I I ll think about it.
3
SPEAKER_02
So no toilets involved with this new duckling.
3
SPEAKER_01
There was a guy on tiktok who he had a monkey that would like open presents.
3
SPEAKER_01
And the monkey died.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was sad.
3
SPEAKER_02
That sounds horrible.
3
SPEAKER_02
That sounds really horrible.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know why I told that story.
3
SPEAKER_01
It didn t really add to the conversation.
3
SPEAKER_01
Is there anything else that you want to say to the people?
3
SPEAKER_01
Thank you for telling this story.
3
SPEAKER_01
If I go to San Juan and I want to interview people and find out what the word on the street is in Puerto Rico, they speak Spanish there, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, mostly Spanish, but we have like 80% of our people are bilingual by now.
3
SPEAKER_01
I can speak a little Polco.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, un poco de español.
3
SPEAKER_02
Un poco aquí, un poco allá.
3
SPEAKER_01
Si, verdad.
3
SPEAKER_02
A little bit of here, a little bit of there.
3
SPEAKER_02
Don t worry, I got you.
3
SPEAKER_02
But like I told you, over here now, about 80-90% of the people are bilingual.
3
SPEAKER_01
Alright, cool.
3
SPEAKER_01
I ll go down there.
3
SPEAKER_01
I want to see what s going on.
3
SPEAKER_02
Of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
I would recommend the Old San Juan District.
3
SPEAKER_02
It s really close to the airport and super busy.
3
SPEAKER_01
John, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
3
SPEAKER_02
Well, I wasn t even thinking about getting called tonight because it s my first time calling, but... Well, anybody that s trying to call here to talk to the GECK, it s not that hard.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I also want to appreciate you, GECK, for everything that you do.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thanks, man.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thank you.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m trying my best out here.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m no Ducklin, but I m GECKing as hard as I can.
3
SPEAKER_02
Of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
You would swim down up the stream of a toilet if you were with Duckling.
3
SPEAKER_01
I know you would.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, I d drown in piss.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thanks for calling, John.
3
SPEAKER_02
Of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
I ll be the first one at your show if you come here to Puerto Rico.
3
SPEAKER_02
Or at public questioning, I ll be there.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_01
All right.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m going to do it.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if I ll do a show, but I ll definitely come down there to fuck around.
3
SPEAKER_02
Please.
3
SPEAKER_02
I ll be honored.
3
SPEAKER_02
Awesome.
3
SPEAKER_01
Beautiful.
3
SPEAKER_01
Take care, man.
3
SPEAKER_02
You too.
3
SPEAKER_02
Have a great night.
3
SPEAKER_01
Hello.
3
SPEAKER_01
Hello!
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, hi.
3
SPEAKER_01
What s your name?
3
SPEAKER_00
Thank you for calling me.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, I m gonna call myself Veronica.
3
SPEAKER_01
Veronica.
3
SPEAKER_01
Veronica, what is going on with you this evening?
3
SPEAKER_01
How might I get you today?
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, well, I ve been seeing you for a while on Instagram, so I was like, I may need a little bit of help from somebody outside my circle with my current situation.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um,
3
SPEAKER_00
I m 32 and I m married.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ve been married for a while now.
3
SPEAKER_00
We re going on 10 years.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, I got married relatively young, I would say, but I m Latina.
3
SPEAKER_00
So usually we kind of get married pretty young.
3
SPEAKER_00
And, um, I was like 26.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, basically or less, I think basically, um,
3
SPEAKER_00
It s been almost two years that our relationship has basically changed the dynamic.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like I met him being a student and we met literally because we smoked weed and we had like the same crew.
3
SPEAKER_00
And one night we basically drank too much.
3
SPEAKER_00
And from that night on, we never slept apart.
3
SPEAKER_00
So
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, it was fun.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was very fun.
3
SPEAKER_00
But then when we moved back to my home country, things have really changed.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like he became this, I would say, sexist type of guy, like controlling, boring.
3
SPEAKER_00
We used to go on hikes and to the beach.
3
SPEAKER_00
And now it s like it s very boring.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I consider myself young and, you know,
3
SPEAKER_00
I m a doctor also, so I wanna enjoy as much as I can my life, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
So a lot of things have been happening from disrespecting my friends and my family, and I permitted it unconsciously.
3
SPEAKER_00
I would call it manipulation.
3
SPEAKER_00
And on October, he called me unfaithful, like I was unfaithful that I was with another man, and that s not true.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, back then it wasn t true.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, so when he called me that, I just decided to go ahead and cheat on him.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I did.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I mean, I don t feel the same way even prior to that event.
3
SPEAKER_00
I haven t felt the same way sexually towards him.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, I don t want to be with a person that I don t feel attracted to anymore.
3
SPEAKER_00
And now that I ve had other experiences, it s like even harder decision if I should
3
SPEAKER_00
the worst moment.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean,
4
SPEAKER_01
he accused me of being unfaithful, he literally denigrated me.
4
SPEAKER_01
He said that he doesn t like me on more than one occasion.
4
SPEAKER_01
He called me that I was the worst wife ever, that I was a horrible person.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I even left my own home, which is mine, actually.
4
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, it just felt like I had to get away.
4
SPEAKER_01
it s been a little bit hard to decide if I really want to get a divorce or not, because it s so much years with this person.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then there s this other guy, this thing I cheated with, which I got lucky.
4
SPEAKER_01
I would say I used Bumble and I met this person and we kind of clicked, you know, and we didn t know anybody around each other.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he s also in a relationship.
4
SPEAKER_01
So it,
4
SPEAKER_01
It starts like for me, it s only sexual.
4
SPEAKER_01
But now I feel that this guy, the side guy, is kind of getting a little bit of feeling towards me.
4
SPEAKER_01
So I feel now I have like a double trouble.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, I don t know if I want to stay with my husband and like miss out on life opportunities that I ve been missing out for two to three years or just start meeting new people.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, I don t know if this is just
4
SPEAKER_01
part of my friendship.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if it s just because I m horny right now, like I want to know other people, or if it s generally that I m not in love with my husband.
4
SPEAKER_01
because he literally denigrated me.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, really bad.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I m confused because you said two different things and maybe they re both true, but you said your husband was being manipulative, but you were also saying that you were mainly upset because he became boring.
4
SPEAKER_00
Was it just a combination of those two?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes, a combination, completely, completely, completely.
4
SPEAKER_01
He wasn t like this at all, at all.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, I did, I would say, grow up a little, but you know,
4
SPEAKER_01
I was, I was, I m always the type of girl to have a lot of guy friends and, and really be a guy.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, you know, I m, I m a gamer, I am a nerd and whatnot.
4
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, when, once we moved to my hometown, I feel that, you know, and again, I am a doctor, so he caught, I think he got like intimidated with the whole situation, but you know, that s not my problem.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, you know, I, at the end of the day, I don t even,
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, he tried to even, like, buy me at a point.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, trying to spoil me.
4
SPEAKER_00
And that s not even it.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again?
4
SPEAKER_01
Veronica.
4
SPEAKER_00
Veronica.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, I remember that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, Veronica, I don t want to... It s very hard to answer these without telling people what to do.
4
SPEAKER_00
But I ll try my best.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it sounds like you re unhappy with your husband.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I do love him, but I m not in love with him.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m not.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I feel.
4
SPEAKER_00
And it sounds like he is like, and he doesn t know that you cheated on him with this guy.
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, he knows I did it once, but more than once.
4
SPEAKER_00
So he knows you did it once, but it s been more than once.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because he, because he checked my phone.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, this is, this is very long.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, you know, he basically.
4
SPEAKER_00
Veronica, like,
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean this, I mean... I was always loyal.
4
SPEAKER_00
Veronica, I don t even know if you called in to hear my perspective because there s nothing I m going to say to you that you don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s the thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do know and I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do know and I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s the thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like even the other day, you know, he did
4
SPEAKER_01
I forgave him on October, partially, not really.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, let s slow down, slow down for a second, because you can keep adding detail, you can keep adding detail after detail after detail, but it s not going to actually really like solve or get to any like... So you ve been with this guy for 10 years?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so since you were 22 years old?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I see.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s one year less than me.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s 31.
4
SPEAKER_00
All right.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you ve been in this relationship for you ve you ve been you have really very no experience being single as an adult.
4
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t.
4
SPEAKER_00
And it s not...
4
SPEAKER_00
And again, I don t want to tell you what to do because, you know, I m just on the phone with you here and this is a 10-year relationship and everything is, you know, for as much as Reddit and the internet and whatever have their thoughts about things, you know, everyone feels differently about their own individual situation.
4
SPEAKER_00
But look, you know, I don t think you need to hate yourself for having the feelings of wanting to explore that which you have not explored, but the way that you re doing it right now is not going to be helpful to anyone, including you, you know?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
And you know that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Again, I m not telling you anything that you don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s just, it s tough to, I m scared of just like leaving him and then like, in a way, being alone.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t, I don t know, I don t know, I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s fear, I would say.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And, and, and, and I don t know, the streets are not the best neither, you know.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like what s available neither, you know, I m always gonna be in a hospital.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m always Occupied I m never home.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, I m not I m not gonna be here s what I don t understand Why is being with so why is being in a relationship that you re unhappy with better than being alone?
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh
4
SPEAKER_01
I know.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m so like, I m so scared of.
4
SPEAKER_00
And also, you know, and also like for hit, like if you really love this guy, like for his sake, I mean, you re throwing this guy for a fucking, I don t know what his deal is and I don t know why he s going crazy cause I m not talking to him right now.
4
SPEAKER_00
And if I was, I wouldn t know.
4
SPEAKER_00
But, um, you know, I mean for hit, you re throwing this guy for a loop too.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I, I wasn t honest.
4
SPEAKER_01
I we re, we re actually on like a break or like an, I asked for a break, but you know, we re married, so I m just living in my house.
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you guys have kids?
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh no, thank God.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I can t right now.
4
SPEAKER_01
We do have a dog though, but you know, um, and literally the dog is almost the same age as our relationship.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s nine years old, you know?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, so that would be, that would be fun to that.
4
SPEAKER_00
That actually is funny.
4
SPEAKER_00
Cause there s the idea of staying.
4
SPEAKER_00
I ve heard of, I ve heard of people staying together for the kids, but never staying together for the dog.
4
SPEAKER_01
It is something that I did speak to him, you know, cause I did tell him that I wanted this break and I don t know how long it s going to be.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I don t know if it s gonna, like, I don t know the end result.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if I want to leave him or if.
4
SPEAKER_01
I am going to stay with him.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I feel, it s like you said, I feel I m staying with him because of the history and not the present.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s just such a hard fucking decision.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, yeah, so so you you again, we re not like this is this is not a decision that requires the discovery of new information.
4
SPEAKER_00
This is a decision that requires a little bit of faith.
4
SPEAKER_00
A little bit of courage.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
And there s a hard thing for everybody.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m not an expert neither of them.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, of course, of course, of course.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, no, no, no, no.
4
SPEAKER_01
But, you know, I wanted to because, you know, I have a lot of people around me that know him and it s like, oh, you know, you should.
4
SPEAKER_00
So tell me this.
4
SPEAKER_00
Tell me this.
4
SPEAKER_00
OK, you have clearly talked about this with your friends and family who are familiar with you and your relationship.
4
SPEAKER_00
And what do they have to say?
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, I haven t told them completely what he did, what he did to me, because it would just be like, leave him.
4
SPEAKER_01
They would definitely leave him.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was basically besides it was manipulative behavior that I don t understand how I noticed it, you know, like.
5
SPEAKER_02
He would time me if I would be in my dad s house.
5
SPEAKER_02
He would be like, how long are you going to stay there?
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, I m in my dad s house.
5
SPEAKER_02
I can stay as long as I want.
5
SPEAKER_02
Or, you know, he would be very jealous of my friends and tell me that my best friend was controlling and that my other best friend was a whore.
5
SPEAKER_02
And then my other male best friend, he knew that I was going to leave him for my best friend.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m like,
5
SPEAKER_02
You know, and I don t understand how I permitted all that.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how... He... Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Um... Veronica, um... And there s even more than that.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s the worst part, like... Yeah, it was really hurtful.
5
SPEAKER_01
You can really... You can... You can...
5
SPEAKER_01
I m, I m, I, this stuff is so hard because I m no expert on relationships, on navigating relationships, and on navigating like, but, but, but Veronica, Veronica, and, and, and, I m maybe being hypocritical saying this, but like, it, it s, Veronica, it s so, like, being, it s so,
5
SPEAKER_01
Life is too short for you to be this fucking miserable.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know what I mean?
5
SPEAKER_01
Life is too short for you to be this fucking miserable.
5
SPEAKER_01
And so you can either sit on the fence and just keep being miserable, or, like, do what you gotta do to... to... to...
5
SPEAKER_01
Progress your life forward and not be living in constant anxiety and constant fear and constant guilt and constant all this shit You know, and I don t know And I don t know what s going on with this guy and I don t know what his problems are But that s what this is where I m on the phone with you right now.
5
SPEAKER_01
So like just just
5
SPEAKER_01
I m not gonna tell you what decisions to make but just like you you know You know, I don t I m not gonna you know what s going on with you right now.
5
SPEAKER_01
There s no further Information that you need right like you re unhappy What decisions in your are you gonna make you?
5
SPEAKER_01
More happy.
5
SPEAKER_01
I think you know the answer to those things and all it takes is you to have the courage to to
5
SPEAKER_01
To act.
5
SPEAKER_01
Uh-huh.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s a good thing.
5
SPEAKER_01
Because you don t want to stay trapped and unhappy forever.
5
SPEAKER_01
People do that.
5
SPEAKER_01
And they d be cool if- Yeah, and I don t want to do that.
5
SPEAKER_01
No, you don t want to do that.
5
SPEAKER_01
And for him too.
5
SPEAKER_01
And for him too.
5
SPEAKER_01
Because if you love this guy- This is the other fucking thing about relationships.
5
SPEAKER_01
If you love this guy, if you really do, if you mean that, if you love this guy, you ll make the decision that s best for his happiness too.
5
SPEAKER_01
Also 100% 100% And I think the decision that s best for his happiness will probably be the one that s best for yours as well And I don t know what that decision is.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m not gonna tell you what to fucking do with your life, but uh You know, just just think about all this shit Veronica, okay?
5
SPEAKER_01
Is like Is any of this helpful for you?
5
SPEAKER_01
Does any of this resonate with you in any way?
5
SPEAKER_02
No, no, no, yes.
5
SPEAKER_02
No, definitely because it s crazy because I do know what I want, but then
5
SPEAKER_02
When I spoke to him, I was very sincere.
5
SPEAKER_02
When I spoke to him, he did, like, he does try, like, I feel either is he manipulating me again, or he really wants me back, or both.
5
SPEAKER_02
And it s a little bit scary.
5
SPEAKER_02
It s very scary.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, it just, it throws you off.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, it throws me off.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, that s how, and it s sad because we were a really beautiful couple.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, we were, again, I was faithful for,
5
SPEAKER_02
for almost the whole 10 years.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like I, you know, I would, I would need, yeah, I would, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
5
SPEAKER_02
Um, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Look for happiness.
5
SPEAKER_02
Definitely.
5
SPEAKER_02
And don t get married.
5
SPEAKER_02
Have a good night.
5
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
5
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
5
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how,
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how life works.