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Coming up next on Passion Struck.
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When you re a strong independent woman and you ve got someone who s trying to take that away from you, it becomes deep, deep, deep rooted.
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So from that point forward, I was on a mission.
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I was hell-bent to figure out what I could do to get my power back.
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And I started going to the gym again, and I was like, man, I remember what this feels like.
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This is me.
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This is what I do.
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This defines me and who I am.
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On top of being successful, it was just something, if you re successful and then you look successful, you re even more powerful.
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So that was just kind of like where that all started.
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And then I got a wild hair up my rear one day, and I m like, I ll do a competition.
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Because how hard could it be?
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I ve already done a million bikini contests.
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I ve already been on TV.
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I ve done all this stuff.
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It can t be that difficult.
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Little did I know, I hired my coach and then I learned really quickly what the difference between somebody who just goes to the gym and a bodybuilder was.
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Welcome to Passion Struck.
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Hi, I m your host, Jon R. Miles, and on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world s most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you.
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Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself.
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If you re new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays.
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We have long-form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes.
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Now, let s go out there and become Passion Struck.
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Hello, everyone, and welcome back to episode 434 of Passion Struck, consistently ranked the number one alternative health podcast.
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A heartfelt thank you to each and every one of you who return to the show every week, eager to listen, learn, and discover new ways to live better, be better, and make a meaningful impact in the world.
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If you re new to the show, thank you so much for being here, or you simply want to introduce this to a friend or a family member, and we so appreciate it when you do that.
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We have episode starter packs, which are collections of our fans  favorite episodes that we organize into convenient topics that give any new listener a great way to get acclimated to everything we do here on the show.
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Either go to passionstruck.com or Spotify to get started.
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Are you curious to find out where you stand on the path to becoming passionstruck?
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Dive into our engaging passionstruck quiz crafted to reflect the core principles shared in my latest book,
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This quiz offers you a dynamic way to gauge your progress on the PassionStruck continuum.
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Just head over to PassionStruck.com to embark on this insightful journey.
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In case you missed it earlier in the week, I had a fantastic interview with Eric Edmeades, a revolutionary thinker in the world of health and wellness.
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Eric, who s the author of Post-Diabetic and a renowned speaker, delves into the transformative power of understanding our relationship with food and the pivotal
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role of metabolism in achieving unparalleled health and vitality.
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And if you liked that episode or the one today, we would so appreciate you giving it a five-star rating and review.
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It goes such a long way in bringing more people into the Passion Star community.
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And also, we and our guests love to hear feedback from our listeners.
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Today, we delve into the captivating journey of Marie Butler, a woman whose life story embodies the essence
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passion-driven transformation.
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Born in the heart of Kansas City, Missouri, and later making her mark in Florida and North Carolina, Marie s path is a testament to the power of embracing change, pursuing personal excellence, and living with intention at every turn.
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From her early days navigating the challenges and opportunities of her upbringing,
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Through her dynamic career that spans from the vibrant atmosphere of Hooter s corporate training team to the competitive world of real estate, Marie s story is one of relentless perseverance, adaptability, and the pursuit of passion across every facet of her life.
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Not content with conventional success, Marie ventured into the demanding world of professional bodybuilding.
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rapidly ascending to pro status and setting her sights on the prestigious Olympia competition.
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In this episode, we explore how Marie s journey reflects the core principles of being passionstruck.
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A life where actions, ambitions, and aspirations are not just aligned, but are also deeply infused with an unwavering dedication to personal growth and self-actualization.
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We ll uncover the pivotal moments, mindset shifts, and the intrinsic motivation that propelled Marie through various career transitions, the challenges of balancing professional success with motherhood, and her bold leap into the world of bodybuilding.
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Join us as Marie Butler shares her extraordinary journey, offering insights into how she navigated the twists and turns of life with grace, courage, and an indomitable spirit.
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Whether you re seeking inspiration to embark on your own path to passion-driven transformation,
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We re looking to glean wisdom from someone who s courageously crafted her life in the image of her ideal self.
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This episode promises to be a compelling exploration of what it means to live passion struck.
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Thank you for choosing Passion Struck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life.
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Now, let that journey begin.
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I am absolutely thrilled today to welcome Marie Butler to Passion Struck.
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Welcome, Marie.
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Thank you.
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Thanks for having me.
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Well, Marie, I always like to give the audience an opportunity to get to know the guest.
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And I think for you, exploring a little bit about your upbringing makes a lot of sense.
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You grew up in Kansas City.
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Yes.
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And from the way you and I talked about it, you had an interesting upbringing.
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Can you tell us a little bit about that and how it shaped you?
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Yes, so I didn t have the ideal situation growing up.
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We moved around a lot.
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My mother kind of dated around and we were kind of just doing what we could to make things work.
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I spent a lot of time with my grandparents and just kind of bebopped around until high school when we ended up moving to Florida.
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OK.
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And was there any key things that taught you or is it more you learned what not to do.
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Correct.
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Yes.
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So it s more of I think children are little sponges.
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So you look and you adapt to the people around you.
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I was able to at a very young age look and say this is not what I want for my life.
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And I was able to kind of mold and make turns to do the opposite.
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OK.
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Well, one thing I wanted to ask is, for you, what does passion mean for you?
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How would you define passion in your eyes?
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Passion is something that you wake up with, that burns inside of you, that you do everything in your day around that.
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So if you have a passion for something, you just live, breathe, eat it, and immerse yourself in it, into something.
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OK, well, it s going to be a core theme of your interview today because you ve certainly been passionate about a number of things throughout your life.
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And your career has spanned various roles.
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You started out really in hospitality, then got into marketing, now real estate.
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Can you share how your passion guided these decisions?
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Sure.
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So the upbringing that I had, you learn really quickly that it s kind of like a dog eat dog world.
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Nothing in this world is given to you.
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You have to work really hard for it.
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So when you have nothing, you have to work that much harder to get to a neutral position.
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So for me, it was always a fight to have a better job, to get promoted in that job that I m in, make more money, travel more and do that.
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So I think that s just kind of what has always fueled me is that
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I want to be better.
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I want to grow.
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What can I do as a person to make myself and everyone around me better.
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OK.
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And on that quest to rise did you ever feel like you were out of balance with your authentic self like you were trying to achieve but something inside of you was calling you to do something different.
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Yeah, so when you work for a huge corporation like I did, they mold you into what they want and need from you.
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So you get into kind of a celebrity mindset, if you will, of I have to do whatever I m paid to do.
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So if you re at this gig or you re at this marketing job, you re kind of molded into what they re paying you to do.
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So you kind of lose who you are as a person.
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So through that, I constantly just tried to ground myself with my faith and with reminders of my upbringing of who I was and who I ultimately wanted to be.
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Okay.
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And I think that s great.
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And I know something I found in my own life as a corporate executive was I just reached a point where I felt I was doing so much to help other people make money and other people s dreams come true, but I wasn t doing the same thing for myself.
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Did you ever feel like that?
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I actually just had, last year, my coach, my bodybuilding coach, pulled me to the side of the gym, and he said, I need you to stop doing everything for everyone else, and I need you to do what you need to do to succeed.
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And I never, until that moment, of 30 plus years on this earth, looked at it that way.
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I was always a lover and a doer, because I never had anything.
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I always wanted to give people what I never had.
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And that moment, I was like, you re right.
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And that changed so much of my life.
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Well, I want to go back to your earlier career just to touch on it.
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So you ended up starting working for Hooters Corporate.
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And for those of you who might be tuning in, we re talking today from St.
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Petersburg, Florida.
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And Hooters actually was founded in this area.
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And then you ended up shifting to marketing.
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How did you navigate the challenges and opportunities that came with these roles?
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I ve always been a fighter and a go-getter.
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And one of the cool things about Hooters is if you stay in front of the people who matter, then you re obviously going to grow with the company.
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So I started in a little tiny Hooters restaurant in Jacksonville, North Carolina.
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It was the hub of Camp Lejeune.
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So it was, nobody really knew about it unless you had to be there.
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So one year, the owners all came through to do a wellness check of the restaurant, see how it s doing, seeing why it was so successful, why we were putting out these big, huge
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that we were.
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And at the time, I was a lead server or trainer for our store, so I got to wait on that table.
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So it was my opportunity, like an interview, right?
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So you get to wait on them, you get to show them what you re made of.
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And from there, I just kind of like got to know them individually.
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And they said, hey, do you want to start traveling with us?
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Well, yeah, duh, of course.
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And so from there, it was just the same thing.
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Every time we got to a place, I just want to elevate more and more and just open and do as many opportunities with them as I could.
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Okay.
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And as I was looking into your background, I love doing these interviews, especially with friends, because you learn things about them that you never knew.
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And I learned that you won the Best Damn Dream Girl title with Fox Sports.
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And for those
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who aren t familiar with this, if you ve ever seen the background of a shoot for Sports Illustrated, it reminded me very much of the same thing.
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So that was a really big achievement because you competed against 14, 16 other women.
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Yes, so it started way back at the restaurant.
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So, locally, you do a local bikini contest.
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You win your local, then you go to your regional bikini contest, then you win your regional, then you go to your state, and then from your state, that s when you go to the actual international pageant.
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So, I represented Clearwater at the international Hooters pageant.
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From there, I placed top 10, and those top 10 girls go to the Best Damn Dream Girls show.
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And so, they took us to Colorado, which was so cold and miserable.
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We went skiing in the snow.
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We did all these cool things in the snow.
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And then we went to the Bahamas, which was way more up my alley.
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And did some stuff there and filmed with them.
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But it was just, it was an incredible experience.
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It really was.
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Yeah, and when you went into the competition, did you know any of the other girls?
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And as you started to compete, did you know in the back of your head that you had this?
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No.
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So the cool thing about it is America voted.
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We had no control over it, and we had no clue who was winning.
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which was really cool.
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So the girls, you get to know them just from the pageants and whatever, because they re all from different areas of the country.
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So you don t know them personally.
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So we develop a relationship.
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We go into this whole thing together.
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And week by week, it was like a basketball bracket.
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So you had to beat that girl and then beat the next girl.
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And then you get into the top four.
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And then the top four is when America does the big vote.
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And then that s when they announce the winner.
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But it was crazy, because we had no clue the whole time who was winning until we got to Hollywood.
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Wow.
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That s incredible.
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Well, doing something like that, I personally have never done anything like that, but it s got to be a little bit nerve-wracking to approach it because you are really putting yourself out there for the world to see.
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How did you go through the thought process that you even wanted to pursue something like that?
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I had no choice.
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So our marketing director for the Clearwater office was like, you need to do the calendar.
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You need to go.
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I m like, no, I just want to serve chicken wings and have fun and make money and go home at the end of the day.
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Right.
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So at that time I was doing, you know, modeling gigs here and there.
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I was doing trade shows here and there, just little things on the weekends.
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and I had a portfolio.
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So he took my portfolio and submitted it to the calendar committee, and then they chose me.
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So I was kinda like pushed into it, which is kinda cool.
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I look back on it and I m thankful for it now, but it wasn t my personality.
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I was just like a very much, I wanna sit around and mess around at the restaurant and just work and do my thing and go.
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I was never a flashy person who was gonna be on a yacht or in this fancy place in Bahamas.
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It just wasn t me, but it was just,
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You kind of got to remember who you are and where you come from in moments like that, because it will go to your head really quickly.
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Well, as I was going through it, and I m really segueing here because this kind of just came to me, I heard that at the time that you loved to play poker.
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Yes.
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And I don t know if you know who Annie Duke is.
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No, I don t.
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Annie Duke is one of the most famous female poker players.
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I think she s won $5 million.
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Wow.
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And she s stopped now.
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But interestingly enough, when she was at her height, part of the reason she was so good is she was one or two classes away from getting a PhD in behavior science.
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And so she really used the core learnings of what she was doing to understand how to play poker.
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Is it something you still do?
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No.
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And the funny thing was, when you go on these shows, the producers sit down with you and they kind of, like, grab something that they want you to be representing.
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So, at the time, we were just having Tuesday night poker games at the house, like, $10 buy-ins.
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We would have our chips.
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And we would play until the end.
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You win, like, 80 bucks.
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It wasn t really a big thing.
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It was just something fun to do.
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But, for me, I never played poker.
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So, I learned.
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And then I was starting to, like, learn how to, like,
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mess with people or trick them or whatever.
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So it was just kind of something fun.
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And then the producers grabbed that and ran with it.
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And I m like, I m really not that good.
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I promise.
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You know, the Lady Gaga song was really popular then.
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So it was like this whole thing.
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But I don t play poker.
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I enjoy it, but I m not good at it.
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I think my favorite part of the video was when you give your poker face.
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That was pretty funny.
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We had a good time.
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I mean, the one thing that s cool about that that you never realize is there s so much that go into these big productions.
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It s not just them filming and then they put it out.
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Like, there s so many cuts and editing and questions and things that go into it.
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And I was really taken back because I m like, wow, they took all the best parts of me and made them visible to everyone else.
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So that was really neat.
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Well, I mean, you don t even see it on this show.
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One to two minutes of taping turns into a whole bunch of editing that you don t even know about.
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Because you get the tape, then you ve got to go through it, then you ve got to go through the edits, then you get it back, then you ve got to go through it again.
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So it s a lot.
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And then you ve got to figure out how you want to use it in shorts and everything.
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Well, how do you think that this whole winning the competition, how did that influence you personally from a personal growth standpoint and how did that have bearing on where your career ended up going?
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not to keep beating a dead horse, but when you grow up the way that I did, you always feel like you re not enough, or you always feel like I could never do that, or I ll never be successful like that.
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But in that moment, it was so emotional because I was like, man, I just beat out thousands of the most beautiful women on this planet, right?
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Because it s international.
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And that was just a moment like, man,
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I had such a strong support system from the internet.
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Clearly, the internet liked me, which I was thankful for.
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At home, we were in a really good position.
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Things were just kind of taking a turn.
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So that moment was kind of like the fire that lit me.
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It s like, if I can do this, I can do anything.
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And then from there, it was just, I did that.
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Everything I ve done or worked on, I ve just always tried to go to the top.
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Yeah, and you made a significant career shift after this, and you ended up going into real estate.
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And I don t think you and I have ever discussed it, but I have a real estate license.
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And I was actually the CEO of a company called BuyOwner and BuyOwner.
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Once I got into it, I didn t realize all the different aspects of real estate and depending on if you re doing commercial or residential, how much it entails.
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So it was a significant shift.
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What motivated you to want to get into that and make that your career?
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In my life, people have always influenced me, so I ve never really made a decision like, I m gonna be a real estate agent now.
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I was in a group of people, in hospitality, and they re like, you d make a really great real estate agent.
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And I m like, what?
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Real estate s for old ladies with white hair and big cheetah print shirts.
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That s what I thought a real estate agent was.
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And they re like, no, no, no, real estate agents are sleek, and they re cool, and they re young, and young people are getting their real estate license.
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And I m like, all right, I ll think about it.
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And then I had some downtime.
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I was in between jobs.
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I was like, what can I do to get out of this rut of selling beer, being in a restaurant?
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Not that there s anything wrong with it.
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I just wanted more for myself.
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So I was like, well, let s do it.
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It took me so long while I was working because real estate s a lot of law.
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So studying has never been my forte.
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School was definitely never my forte.
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So I m like, oh my gosh, I have 19 chapters of all this law stuff to learn.
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That was a lot.
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So did that and then finally when I got my license, I think it was just like the moment where everything I learned in the past and what was ahead of me in the future collided because it clicked.
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I was like, man, I love this.
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I did my first transaction in the first 30 days and it was game over after that.
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I ve always loved it now.
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I have to tell you and I ve never talked about this at all on the show.
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My first three transactions I worked so hard to get them and each one ended up having a different issue and not one of them went through.
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Yeah.
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And probably the most disturbing one for me is I was representing this person who didn t disclose to me that
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his property was on a sinkhole and that he had done repairs, et cetera.
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And there s this young lady who s buying the house.
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She s 27, 28 years old and very naive.
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And I m talking to this gentleman because he doesn t disclose it to me.
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I found out doing my own research.
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And I go to him and I said, I have to disclose this.
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We have no other choice or else I can get sued.
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You can get sued.
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And he goes, and he was going to have me do 14, 15 other jobs.
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And he said, if you disclose this, he goes, I m never going to work with you again.
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And I think some, we all think about these choices that we have to make.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know I talk a lot about it on the show that it s so important to follow your values.
2
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely.
2
SPEAKER_01
And this was one of those things that to me it was a black and white.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I mean in the end it did cost me that relationship.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I don t think I could have slept with myself if that.
2
SPEAKER_00
No.
2
SPEAKER_01
Have you been faced with situations like that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I mean every real estate transaction is very risky and people think real estates or real estate agents are just like car salesmen were a dime a dozen.
2
SPEAKER_00
We don t really serve a purpose.
2
SPEAKER_00
A.I.
2
SPEAKER_00
is going to take us out.
2
SPEAKER_00
But there s never anything that will be able to replace intuition.
2
SPEAKER_00
values and just overall like care and concern for another human being.
2
SPEAKER_00
So real estate s not just facilitating paperwork to sell a house, you know this.
2
SPEAKER_00
You re a therapist, you re a babysitter, you go down the line of all the things.
2
SPEAKER_00
And so I feel like
2
SPEAKER_00
In those situations, because I ve definitely been faced with them with new construction builders or different people who are like, well, if you do this, we ll give you these 10 other deals.
2
SPEAKER_00
But you can t sleep at night because you re like, well, you cut that corner, and I just saw what you did there.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you re not telling them the full story.
2
SPEAKER_00
And we are stuck in a position where we can t
2
SPEAKER_00
tell them information without, you know, being unfaithful to your fiduciary duty or, you know, your client, per se.
2
SPEAKER_00
But, yeah, it s very scary.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s not just as easy as people think it is.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s a lot of risk.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, well, the other thing that I know is that while I was doing it and people like yourself that I know who do it, I mean, there s a lot of work.
2
SPEAKER_01
You re working weekends, you re working nights.
2
SPEAKER_01
If you re trying to pull a deal together, you kind of have to get that bid in and everything.
2
SPEAKER_01
in order to achieve success.
2
SPEAKER_01
So how did you balance your whole real estate career with raising your son, Logan?
2
SPEAKER_00
I didn t.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m going to be 100% honest.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, he was my assistant for the first two years.
2
SPEAKER_00
He went everywhere with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
He opened doors with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
He did showings and stuff with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
He was like my little sidekick because I didn t have any option.
2
SPEAKER_00
I didn t want to have him be with a babysitter or anything else.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thankfully, his father is there and takes good care of him.
2
SPEAKER_00
But still, I didn t want to lose all that time.
2
SPEAKER_00
And like you said, real estate s 24-7.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I could have easily said, take him, and then I could have every minute of every day filled with something real estate related.
2
SPEAKER_00
So at a point after I got into it and was doing well, I had to take a step back and take like a little hiatus to say, what am I doing?
2
SPEAKER_00
What s important to me?
2
SPEAKER_00
How do I navigate this if this is going to be a long term thing?
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
And for someone who s listening, because I think this is something that a lot of listeners probably are faced with is regardless of what career you re in, a lot of times you want to give your all to it.
2
SPEAKER_01
But it s got ramifications.
2
SPEAKER_01
It did for me.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
How did you go through that process of
2
SPEAKER_01
coming to that conclusion that it was in the best interest of everyone to take that step back, and what would you recommend to other people who might find themselves there?
2
SPEAKER_00
For me, it was a client that was just unruly, that demanded every ounce of me.
2
SPEAKER_00
And it was not for that much money.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, yes, it s not fully money-driven, but we have to pay our bills.
2
SPEAKER_00
And so this person I was just hanging on for dear life, because I didn t want to lose the sale, I didn t want to lose the contract, didn t want to lose the commission.
2
SPEAKER_00
And it just got to the point where, when it closed, I was like, I m never answering that person s phone call again.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t care what they come to the table with.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because I had to put a hard line in the sand.
2
SPEAKER_00
You are allowed to have hours, you re allowed to have your own personal life, and people that want to work with you and respect you will respect those boundaries.
2
SPEAKER_00
So that was something that I had to kind of tell myself and tell everyone around me, because you re nurturing new agents.
2
SPEAKER_00
are hungry and they want to do anything and everything, as did I. But at some point your mental health is priority, your family is priority, and your own personal physical health and that is a priority.
2
SPEAKER_00
So you have to no matter what, as hard as it is, you have to figure out what you need and what can just be kind of like done later.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, well I love that answer and in the book I have this chapter called The Mosquito Auditor and
2
SPEAKER_01
I picked this term, the mosquito, because I was thinking about the invisible influences that get in our way.
2
SPEAKER_01
These people who just seem to derail us from the course that we want to take in life.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I m going to talk a little bit more about this as we go into your next chapter.
2
SPEAKER_01
But what you just reminded me of is when I think about mosquitoes, I define three of them.
2
SPEAKER_01
There s the bloodsucker, the invisible suffocator, and the pain in the ass.
2
SPEAKER_01
And that one that you were just describing is the bloodsucker.
2
SPEAKER_01
where it s like they want every ounce of blood that they can get from you because they think that no one exists besides them.
2
SPEAKER_00
or that no one should exist other than them, which is another hard thing, too, because you have to balance that relationship of the emotional expectation of each person and what that looks like.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because some buyers and sellers don t want to be messed with.
2
SPEAKER_00
They just want you to do your job and then give them the check at the end.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then other people want to be involved in every single line item of the transaction.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then some people trust you fully.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s so many different things.
2
SPEAKER_00
So you have to really learn how to
2
SPEAKER_00
as a good agent and as a good human, learn that person before you decide to take them on as a client.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know, that s a big thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because you ll run into those bloodsuckers more often than not.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, I remember I was interviewing for this high-profile job one time, and they asked me, what s your leadership style?
2
SPEAKER_01
And the answer I gave them was, it s situational.
2
SPEAKER_01
And they didn t like it.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I said, every single person s different.
2
SPEAKER_01
So how you approach a situation or an individual, it s different depending on
2
SPEAKER_01
the situation itself and who that person is because you got to understand what motivates them and use that as
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you have to, and a lot of people use the word chameleon in such a bad term, but you really do have to be a chameleon in this industry because you have to kind of adhere to the situation that you re in, of course, still holding your values and your core things, but you do have to adapt to each one.
2
SPEAKER_00
You might need to be a little bit more emotional and sensitive for a woman who s going through a divorce and needs help, or someone like a businessman who doesn t need you as much, you can kind of be off and just give them the black and white of everything.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s just, it is very situational.
2
SPEAKER_00
I agree with you 100%.
2
SPEAKER_01
So now I want to jump into what is going to be my favorite part of this discussion, which is discussing something that I love, which is fitness.
2
SPEAKER_01
And you and I originally met probably at five o clock in the morning at the gym where I see you five days a week.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
For those who listen to the show and don t believe that I get up that early in the morning, you ve got a witness here who sees me all the time.
2
SPEAKER_01
And she s in there before me.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
4.30 every morning, usually about two hours a day.
2
SPEAKER_01
So when I first met you, I knew that you loved to do fitness and that it had been a constant in your life.
2
SPEAKER_01
But where in this world did this interest evolve into your serious pursuit of bodybuilding?
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
So ever since I was in high school, I had food poisoning when I was a sophomore in high school, which I lost 82 pounds.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was hospitalized because I couldn t eat.
2
SPEAKER_00
They couldn t really figure out what was wrong with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ended up getting strep throat along the way, which was even harder for me to eat and recover.
2
SPEAKER_00
So when I got out of the hospital, I was like 117 pounds, which I was a pretty hefty young kid.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ate what I could when I could, you know, whatever.
2
SPEAKER_00
So they put me into physical therapy, and at that time, physical therapy was in a lot of these big gyms.
2
SPEAKER_00
So Gold s Gym had its own physical therapy section.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I go in there, I ve never set foot in a gym in my life, and I walk in and I m like...
2
SPEAKER_00
who are these beautiful people.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know where you hide every day and so back then you get 3 free workouts of the trainer and the whole thing to get you to join I fell in love it was instant.
2
SPEAKER_00
So it s always been a staple for me as part of mental health and physical health to take care of myself and prioritize my health so
2
SPEAKER_00
As the years went on, it s always been there.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then I got married before.
2
SPEAKER_00
And my husband was into fitness as well.
2
SPEAKER_00
So that was something that we had in common.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then as we got further into the relationship, it became an insecurity for him.
2
SPEAKER_00
So me going to the gym became an insecurity for him.
2
SPEAKER_00
So he wanted to do what he could to keep me out of the gym.
2
SPEAKER_00
Long story short, I fell out of it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I gained a lot of weight.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was really unhappy with myself.
2
SPEAKER_00
The marriage ended.
2
SPEAKER_00
I had to kind of take my power back.
2
SPEAKER_00
It didn t end in a good way, unfortunately.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was a physical altercation.
2
SPEAKER_00
And when you re a strong, independent woman, and you ve got someone who s trying to take that away from you, it becomes deep, deep, deep.
2
SPEAKER_00
rooted.
2
SPEAKER_00
So from that point forward I was on a mission.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was hell bent to figure out what I could do to get my power back.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I started going to the gym again and I was like man I remember what this feels like.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is me.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is what I do.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is how I this is like defines me and who I am.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know on top of being
2
SPEAKER_00
successful.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was just something like if you re successful and then you look successful, you re even more powerful.
2
SPEAKER_00
So that was just kind of like where that all started.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then I got a wild hair up my rear one day and I m like, I ll do a competition because you know how hard it could be.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve already done a million bikini contests.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve already been on TV.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve done all this stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
It can t be that difficult.
2
SPEAKER_00
Little did I know.
2
SPEAKER_00
I hired my coach and then
3
SPEAKER_01
I learned really quickly what the difference between somebody who just goes to the gym and a bodybuilder was.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, I remember when you started and people can t see you because you re sitting down, but I remarked to some of the people we were talking to before, you were like a third smaller than you are now because you ve put on so much muscle mass.
3
SPEAKER_00
And when I follow you on the socials and I see you in the gym and how many hours you re devoting,
3
SPEAKER_00
This decision to turn pro in bodybuilding, it s like no joke.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s no small feat at all.
3
SPEAKER_00
What were some of the major mindset shifts and different things you had to do throughout your day to achieve this level of success?
3
SPEAKER_00
Because you went from basically not even being a blip on the screen to all of a sudden winning competitions in a matter of 12, 18 months.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, so you have to think, like, our world is so inundated with unhealthy things.
3
SPEAKER_01
On-the-go, quick and easy, fad things, you know, this is a quick way to lose weight, this and da-da-da.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you learn really quickly when you re preparing for a bodybuilding competition what really is healthy and what s not healthy, which you d be very surprised if you looked at our food that we take in.
3
SPEAKER_01
activity versus resting, because so many people think you have to just work out, work out, work out, work out, work out without resting, which is another huge thing.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then just prioritizing how you re doing things in the gym and what level of intensity that you re doing.
3
SPEAKER_01
So all of those things were a huge wake-up call when you really, truly learn what it takes.
3
SPEAKER_01
But once you get in that pocket,
3
SPEAKER_01
it s almost like you never see anything the same ever again and you just get into that mode.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you have a formula, you follow the formula, you get to A. You make a new formula, you get to B. You make a new formula and you just learn your body and what it does and how it responds to get you to each new level.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, I was recently watching the Arnold Schwarzenegger documentary, which I thought was great.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes, he s amazing.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, because I don t think people realize, like, the amount of effort that he put in.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think a lot of people think, well, he just had this build and it was natural, and it couldn t have been... He was on a mission.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, and that s how I look at you.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, you were on this mission to be the best.
3
SPEAKER_00
And coming from where you were to this, I think people have these goals, and they think that
3
SPEAKER_00
it s too lofty a goal to pursue.
3
SPEAKER_00
And when I look back from where you were to where you are now, you could say the same thing about your journey.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like what would you be your advice?
3
SPEAKER_00
Like if someone, it doesn t have to be bodybuilding, but whatever they want to achieve, like how do you start?
3
SPEAKER_00
And like, how do you keep it going?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s about the little wins.
3
SPEAKER_01
So people will sometimes look at things like, when I started, I didn t say, I m gonna be an IFBB pro.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s a really far away goal.
3
SPEAKER_01
First, you gotta step on stage, then you ve gotta win something, and then you can, you know, so it s about winning small things each day, and that s in anything you do.
3
SPEAKER_01
If you wake up and you check off everything on your to-do list that day, that s a win.
3
SPEAKER_01
you can start the next day with a fresh slate.
3
SPEAKER_01
Or if you have a couple things left, put those on another list and start your new list.
3
SPEAKER_01
But it s about just being consistent with the things that need to get done and checking the boxes.
3
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t need to be a huge grand thing.
3
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t need to be something that s like a major undertaking.
3
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t have to be life changing.
3
SPEAKER_01
It just needs to be small little things that you see over time become really big things.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I love that, because so many people come to me and they say, I don t have the confidence to take the action to do it, or I don t have the courage to do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
And what I tell them is, you ve got the equation wrong.
3
SPEAKER_01
Correct.
3
SPEAKER_00
You ve got to take action to create courage and to create the confidence that s going to make you start taking bolder action.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
But if you don t take action at all, you re going to just sit here spinning.
3
SPEAKER_00
Do you think that s accurate?
3
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely, and how many times a day does somebody say, I just wish I had a body like you, or I wish I could do what you do.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I look at them, and I m like, if you really wanted to, you would.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that s the bottom line.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m a no BS person when it comes to that, because you can 100% do anything you put your mind to, anything.
3
SPEAKER_01
But if you don t think you can do it, of course you re never going to achieve it.
3
SPEAKER_01
And if you don t think you can do it, you re not going to take the steps that it takes to get to that level either.
3
SPEAKER_01
So there s people in the gym that have better bodies than I do, and they would never think of competing.
3
SPEAKER_01
But if they did and they wanted to, they d probably be a little bit further.
3
SPEAKER_01
It just depends.
3
SPEAKER_00
So when I think of bodybuilding, it s really an intense discipline and it requires eating habits, sleep habits, you probably can t drink because you re trying to keep your body fat, but it takes a lot of time because it s not just going to the gym, it s the mental preparation, it s everything else.
3
SPEAKER_00
How do you balance being a pro with your career in real estate and motherhood?
3
SPEAKER_01
So, for me, I had to draw a hard line in the sand that the things I needed for myself came first.
3
SPEAKER_01
So, meal prep comes first.
3
SPEAKER_01
I do it once a week.
3
SPEAKER_01
Everything with my schedule, the gym is a non-negotiable.
3
SPEAKER_01
So, I m up at 4.30 before anyone else gets up.
3
SPEAKER_01
That way, I can get it done and move on, because 8.00, 8.30, people start waking up, and that s when the phone calls start coming and everything like that.
3
SPEAKER_01
So it s just adjusting things on my end and giving things on my end and then having other sacrifices.
3
SPEAKER_01
But in the end, it works out for everyone because now I get up early, go to the gym.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m done for the day.
3
SPEAKER_01
So when my son gets home from school, if I don t have any work stuff, we can spend the evening together.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t have to worry about going to the gym and doing all that stuff.
3
SPEAKER_01
And my meals are prepped, done and ready, so I know exactly what food I need at what time of the day, and then it just becomes a routine.
3
SPEAKER_01
And your body will actually start telling you when it s time to eat.
3
SPEAKER_01
So, if you re sitting there, it s like 12 o clock, my stomach s rumbling, I m like, man, I m hungry, and I m like, oh, that s why, because it s 12 o clock.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it becomes something that your body will tell you.
3
SPEAKER_01
Same thing with rest and recovery.
3
SPEAKER_01
If you re feeling tired and you re feeling worn down, rest.
3
SPEAKER_01
You re not going to accomplish anything if you go to the gym and push through it or do it anyways.
3
SPEAKER_01
You re hurting yourself.
3
SPEAKER_01
Take the day, sleep for 16 hours if you need to, and start over again the next day.
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s learning your body and what it needs.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and one of the things I like to talk about on the show is I think there s this triangle, I like to say, of the combination of passion,
3
SPEAKER_00
perseverance, and then the third ingredient to me is intentionality, because you have to be intentional about aligning your actions with your ambitions and your aspirations.
3
SPEAKER_00
How have you learned to get that equation right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, boy.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think it s just kind of what I just said.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s just figuring out what that routine looks like for you, how that works with, you know, everyone in your family, your work, and all that stuff, and then just committing to it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, I know that when you want to do anything that s personal growth related, it s going to come with obstacles.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I remember for you, and I m going back to the mosquitoes, as I saw you start to get success, I started seeing mosquitoes coming out of the woodwork, starting to try to dampen the progression that you were making.
3
SPEAKER_00
So can you talk about that?
3
SPEAKER_00
Because I don t think it matters whether it s doing what you re doing.
3
SPEAKER_01
Sure.
3
SPEAKER_00
or anything else but i think when you start creating this new life you envision for yourself and then you start going to reinvent yourself because that s what it entails all of a sudden you re showing up differently yes and i think for some people it s jealousy i think for some people it could be
3
SPEAKER_00
There s this, Maria, we don t know anymore, but I, myself, as I ve gone on this journey, have gotten just a ton of pushback.
3
SPEAKER_00
And sometimes it s been shocking to me because it comes from the people who you would have thought you were closest to.
3
SPEAKER_00
What has happened in your situation and how have you had to deal with that?
3
SPEAKER_01
So when I first started training, it was almost like, we ll see if she ends up doing it, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
We ll just kind of sit back and watch.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I did it.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I got, I did my first show and everybody was so proud of me, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Everyone, yay, she did it, she did it.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then it was the next step.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like, okay, I ve got to go back into an off season.
3
SPEAKER_01
Still, everyone s supporting, everyone s supporting.
3
SPEAKER_01
But then when I committed to competing for my qualification to GoPro,
3
SPEAKER_01
People are like, oh, what does that mean?
3
SPEAKER_01
What do you have to do?
3
SPEAKER_01
And then you re answering questions.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s like nothing different than what I was doing a year ago.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s just a little bit more like my body is different now.
3
SPEAKER_01
So, it responds differently.
3
SPEAKER_01
But when I got into that point that I was going to Texas for my qualification and I was fully depleted, I was just sunken face the whole night, people were like,
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you look disgusting.
3
SPEAKER_01
Why would you do that to yourself?
3
SPEAKER_01
Then all the people that were supporting you were going, you re doing too much.
3
SPEAKER_01
You shouldn t go that far.
3
SPEAKER_01
You don t need to do that.
3
SPEAKER_01
What are you doing this for?
3
SPEAKER_01
You re not making any money.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it was like questioning all the things that they once supported.
3
SPEAKER_01
So for me, I was really confused because I was like, well, hold on.
3
SPEAKER_01
I thought you were supporting me.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then it became a really dark place.
3
SPEAKER_01
But in that dark place is where you dig and you really figure out, do you really want to do this?
3
SPEAKER_01
Is it really worth it to you?
3
SPEAKER_01
And you really figure out who loves you.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that was a big thing for me because I lost a lot of people when I transitioned from a regular person to a bodybuilder because people don t understand it.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it also shines a light on the dark places that they don t want to look at themselves.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, to me, a lot of it gets into self-doubt or fear.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I would think anyone who s making a change has got self-doubt.
4
SPEAKER_00
I actually find that the higher achiever you are, the more imposter syndrome and some of these things come in.
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SPEAKER_00
But to me, bodybuilding would be one of these things where self-doubt could really creep in because it s so easy to look at another bodybuilder and say, oh my God, look at how great they look, this and that.
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How do you maintain motivation, especially when you ve got doubts about... I just look at Instagram.
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No, honestly, I learned this past year was a huge year of growth for me.
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I just learned that you got to focus on what makes you happy and what caters to and care you love on the people around you.
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You want to support them and love on them too.
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And then it will all full circle come back to you.
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Once you weed out all the bad people, you ll really find that core of what you need to.
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But to keep that motivation, you just got to think of like, what am I doing this for?
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And you always have to remember and remind yourself that this is why and then
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constantly asking yourself, do you still want to continue to do that?
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I mean, there s plenty of people who get pro, and then they stop.
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They quit, because they achieved that goal, and they don t have to prove anything anymore.
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But if you want to continue, there s another yellow brick road down the road you can go to.
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So it s personal by personal.
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So you have been extremely intentional about achieving this goal.
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But I don t think that this is the only place you re intentional, because like you said, I know a lot of people who practice real estate.
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But I think it s like any career, there s only a fraction of them who really know how to blow it out.
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And I think the level of intentionality that you have in bodybuilding, you also take to your real estate career, am I wrong?
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Nope, you re not wrong.
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And it was funny because when I first got my license, I said, I m going to make a million dollars because I thought that $800,000 contract was like me making $800,000.
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Don t ask me why it was what I get it.
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But I was like, I m going to make a million dollars instead of saying I was going to make a million dollars sale.
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So once I got that all figured out, those were my goals.
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So I wanted to make a million dollar sale.
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Then I wanted to make five million dollars and I want to do 10 million.
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to where my ultimate goal was $50 million a year.
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And it just took doing the hard stuff to get there, the checking the boxes every day, being intentional with who you re speaking to.
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And I always tell people, time is money.
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Is what you re doing making you any money?
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Because people will sit there all day long and do other things than income-producing activities.
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And so I ll always joke around, and people around me are always saying, is that making you money?
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Is that making you money?
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Because they know, that s what I always tell people, is what you re doing every single day getting you to your goal and making you more money or making you more successful.
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So I now know you and two other people who are bodybuilders completely.
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One s a male, and the woman I know competes in a completely different area than you do.
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But the one gentleman is doing the Arnold this week, and he s won it the two past years, so this is his third year.
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You are trying to go for Olympia.
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Correct.
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Can you, for someone who might be listening who has no idea what we re talking about, what is Olympia, and why is that so prestigious?
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So Olympia is the very biggest award you can get in the bodybuilding community.
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So Mr. and Mrs. Olympia goes back way, way back in the day.
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So for me, being an NPC competitor is an entry-level competitor.
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You win your first show, you become an NPC competitor.
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then you have to qualify, and then you win your pro show, which that s what I m trying to do now, is to win an actual show as a pro, and then you get an automatic invitation to the Olympia.
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And then at the Olympia, that s where the big bucks are made.
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So Mr. Olympia got a half a million dollars, Mrs. Olympia, same thing, you know, each division has a very, very big purse.
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And anyone who s in bodybuilding knows we don t make any money, we spend way more than we bring in, so to get that, it s not only to be
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the best out of thousands of athletes from international, again it s international, and then to say you re the best of that whole division on top of, you know, just the accomplishment of doing it, you know, that s a huge feat and it takes a really long time to get there.
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Yeah.
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So to put maybe Arnold Schwarzenegger s accomplishments into perspective I mean the fact that he kept winning it back to back to back.
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It was no small hurdle because you would think after winning in a couple of times you might lose all the motivation to keep on competing.
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No, then you got to be careful that the young ones don t come and take your title.
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So I m a master s competitor.
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So that s 35 years old and up.
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So as a master, I didn t go pro as a master, which a lot of people get mad about because like, oh, you re old.
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You should be in the old people class.
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But like, I got my pro card in the open division, which is all the young girls.
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So that was really cool.
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So for me, that was just a validation that I could go to the Olympia and still feel very confident that I have a long road ahead of me not being a master s competitor.
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What is next for you?
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I know for you balance in life is extremely important.
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What do you hope in the future for your ambitions, your fitness goals, your family responsibilities?
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Where does this go from here?
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So this year, after going pro, I was able to kind of pump the brakes for a second.
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So when I came off stage in September, I was under the impression that we weren t really going to do anything this year, because I still have a lot of growing to do to compete with the girls that are at the Olympia and pro status.
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Come to find out, I m not really that far off.
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So we re kind of chipping away.
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So the training and all that stuff was still as intense, all that.
4
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But I also got engaged over Christmas, which
4
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I didn t see it coming, but kind of knew it was going to happen, because once Matt and I met, it was just instantaneous.
4
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And he is a bodybuilder as well, so that s kind of like a unicorn to find something like that, someone who understands you.
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But it was just kind of a moment to say, all right, well, now I ve got to plan a wedding.
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I ve got a teenager who s going into high school.
4
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And life in real estate, this market is insane right now.
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So you can t just get a deal and close it.
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A couple of years ago, we were just
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you know, raking it in, but now it s, you gotta put more work and more effort.
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You gotta really get out there and put yourself out there and rise above everyone else that became a real estate agent in that time.
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So, it s just been a lot of kind of like taking back, reassessing everything, and then reprioritizing things.
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Okay.
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Well, I think your story is a great one, and part of the reason I wanted you on the show today is because
4
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I try to bring people on the show that people can relate to.
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Because I think sometimes if you bring someone on who s too lofty, it s hard for people to realize how do you make those changes.
4
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But to me, you re a real-life example of trying to live your dream in progress.
4
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And so I think a lot of the stuff you talked about today was really relatable to the audience.
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Now, I have two final fun questions for you.
4
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So the late, late night show, which you and I don t get to watch because we re in bed a long time before that.
4
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But one of my favorite things on it is they do car karaoke.
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If you ever were the host of the show and you got to do car karaoke with another person, artist, who would it be?
4
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Oh man.
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So I don t listen to mainstream music.
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I listen to Christian music.
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So for me, I would go definitely on the side of Elevation Worship or a group, because these groups are just so full of energy and so exciting.
4
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So I would definitely go with Elevation Worship so we could pack a van and really get some good tunes going.
4
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Well, interestingly enough, about six months ago, I happened to be out at a restaurant with a friend of mine.
4
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And he goes, I want to introduce you to this guy named Jonathan.
4
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And Jonathan just looks like a rock star.
4
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I mean, he s got the tats.
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He s wearing that.
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I mean, you can just kind of tell.
4
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And so I asked him, I m like, what s your background?
4
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He goes, well, I just moved here from Nashville.
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And he goes, I was a touring lead guitarist for many years.
4
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And it turns out he was the lead guitarist for Chris Tomlin.
4
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and he lives here in St.
4
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Pete, and I didn t realize they re on the road 250 days a year, and it was just too much, but yeah, he lives here.
4
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Yeah, because I mean, not only are they singing, but they re also doing sermons and all the other events and everything else, but yeah, they re busy, busy, busy.
4
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Okay, and then I have one other fun question for you, and that is, we just put, for the first time since the 70s, a rocket on the moon.
4
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Oh boy.
4
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So my question is, if you got selected by NASA,
4
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to be an astronaut, and you were one of the first astronauts that got sent to Mars.
4
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You were that first group.
4
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And when you land, they said, we re going to hereby anoint the five or six of you to set the laws and edicts for Mars.
4
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What s one that you would want to set?
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, boy.
4
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a law that I would want to implement.
4
SPEAKER_00
No politics.
4
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Or a principle.
4
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No politics.
4
SPEAKER_01
No politics.
4
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Nobody s going to reign over anyone.
4
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We re all going to figure this out together.
4
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Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, that s great.
4
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Well, Marie, thank you so much for joining us today.
4
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It was such a pleasure to have you.
4
SPEAKER_01
Thank you so much for having me.
4
SPEAKER_00
I thoroughly enjoyed that interview with Maria Butler, and I wanted to thank Marie for joining us on today s program.
4
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Links to all things Marie will be in the show notes at passionstruck.com.
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Our videos are on YouTube, where we have over 250,000 subscribers.
4
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You can go to either John R. Miles, our main channel, or Passion Struck Clips to subscribe.
4
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codes are in one convenient place at PassionStruck.com slash deals.
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I m at John R. Miles on all the social platforms where I post daily.
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And you can also sign up for our weekly newsletter titled Live Intentionally and join over 30,000 subscribers.
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Each week throughout 2024, we are doing
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a boundary-expanding challenge to help you grow on your own journey of becoming PassionStruck.
5
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You re about to hear a preview of the PassionStruck Podcast interview that I did with Sean Foley, who is a golf instructor who has coached some of the biggest-name pro golfers that you know.
5
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including Justin Rose, Tiger Woods, Lee Westwood, Stephen Ames, Danny Willett, Sean O Hare, Hunter Mahan, Lydia Ko, and Sung Yeol Noh.
5
SPEAKER_01
And in this episode, we do a deep dive into his journey to becoming a coach, his philosophies, and his life advice.
5
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Absolutely an episode you don t want to miss.
5
SPEAKER_00
When you look at the brain and its function or you look at our ancestors and how they behaved and why they behaved and what it was all about, I think what it does is allows me now to have kind of less shame and guilt for being what I ve been designed to be.
5
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And so being insecure is
5
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is completely necessary to survival.
5
SPEAKER_00
It really is.
5
SPEAKER_00
When you become secure that you re insecure, it s all good, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
When you can show weakness in front of a camera to the whole world, that s a superpower.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s not a problem.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so I think that s really what we need to look at is what is it that we need to do?
5
SPEAKER_00
But unfortunately, our economy works
5
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on a robotization of human beings.
5
SPEAKER_00
And as Chomsky discussed, an assembly line.
5
SPEAKER_00
Who s your favorite sports team?
5
SPEAKER_00
Sweet 16 birthday.
5
SPEAKER_00
And we all just run through the same narrative that just builds consumption and it s an economy.
5
SPEAKER_01
The fee for this show is that you share it with family or friends when you find something useful or inspirational.
5
SPEAKER_01
If you know someone who s really into understanding the path to becoming your ideal self, then today s episode is a true gift.
5
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definitely share this episode with family and friends.
5
SPEAKER_01
In the meantime, do your best to apply what you hear on the show so that you can live what you listen.
5
SPEAKER_01
And until next time, go out there and become Ash Instructor.