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The Joe Rogan Experience.
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This is a good way to open up the podcast.
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Jamie is an expert on all things Black Twitter.
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What s going on, Jamie?
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I don t know.
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There s a lot going on.
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A lot of rumors are flying.
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The rumors are that Diddy was running some kind of Epstein-type deal where he was filming everybody, right?
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That s the rumors, yeah.
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I don t know that there s any proof of anything other than that.
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The thing is, like, we re getting the rumors from the internet, and the internet thinks that the Taliban took out that bridge in Baltimore, so it s like, who fucking knows?
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Who knows what s real?
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That s what Diddy s lawyers, I think, said.
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It was like, yeah, these are just trumped-up charges.
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Not trumped-up, I don t think they said that, but, like, bullshit charges.
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Dude, when Homeland Security
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Invade your house.
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You got problem with dudes with fucking guns and body armor There s someone said that they weren t there to take stuff.
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They were there to delete everything Like the real people that were in there, you know, oh, that s funny.
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Oh, that s funny.
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Yeah, that s of course There s layers upon layers when you get it fucking conspiracy theories man.
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They they never end They never end.
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There s just layers upon layers upon layers.
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I
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It s fun to talk about it is fun to talk about it s hard to know what s true but Wow people Genuinely love it when someone like Diddy gets caught though the glee that people have is weird Why cuz he s too successful
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Also, there was always so much East Coast, West Coast shit that s still in the zeitgeist.
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Like with Biggie and Tupac, and they were all hating on each other, and they both got killed.
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There was a lot going on.
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And then there s people that thought that Puffy was involved, and Suge Knight was involved.
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Speaking of, I think Suge Knight s the one who said that thing I just thought of.
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What thing?
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About that they were there to delete stuff.
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Who?
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Well, if he really was filming everybody, I mean, he had a lot of people at those parties, right?
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You know who said it?
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Luke from 2 Live Crew?
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Yeah, he said he was to leave early.
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When Luke from 2 Live Crew is leaving early, like, you got a wild party.
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If what s happening is too fucked up for Luke from 2 Live Crew,
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Check please.
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There s so many different stories Who knows?
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What are you gonna do?
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I m not doing we re not involved in them.
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I was never at Diddy s party I don t even know the motherfucker where I don t want to nobody tell me nobody telling jokes.
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I told you having fun That s it.
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Yeah smoking dope cracking jokes making people.
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That s it else s background music
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And living in LA, you have all this shit that s going on around you.
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That s what I, you know, you have your life and then you have all this shit that goes in and out of your ears all fucking day.
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And you re like, I just want to do stand up.
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You also have those, uh, those celebrity environments where celebrities all get together and there s so many of them, you know, in these wild parties.
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And if you got a wild party and P Diddy puts on that wild party and you know, he sets everybody up.
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Like, if you were an intelligence agent, you know, like a Jeffrey Epstein type deal, that d be the way to do it.
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Big old crazy party, get everybody loose.
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And get the cameras rolling.
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Get them the yayo.
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Get them the yayo.
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And everything else.
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Get them everything you need.
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Get fired up.
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Get those cameras rolling.
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And now you got everybody under wraps.
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What a twisted web some folks weave.
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You all right over there?
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Yeah.
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You gotta concentrate.
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That is a skill that I never picked up.
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The roll your own skill.
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Never picked it up.
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Sometimes you got no choice but to pick it up.
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Yeah, no, I should have.
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You re sitting there with Reefer.
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I admire people that do it.
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When I see a person that can roll a solid joint, I m like, that s an exceptional person.
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It s like a person who can play guitar.
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I m like, oh, you took the time.
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There s a level of skill with it, too.
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Some people can roll some nice ones.
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Oh, yeah, man.
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They re done by a machine.
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I ve seen dudes in Instagram driving their car rolling in one hand.
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That s next level.
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Yeah, that s next level.
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That s next level.
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Charlie Murphy could roll a hell of a blunt.
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Charlie Murphy s one of those.
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You know who else rolls a hell of a blunt?
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Lewis.
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Luis Gomez.
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Gomez rolls a hell of a blunt and he does it the real way.
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He doesn t just split the spliff and open it up and lick it or not.
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He takes the paper out and he makes, you know, cuts it like he ll unravel a cigar and then take the tobacco paper and cut it and wet it and get it down.
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I just don t want to get high.
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free base and coke I gotta run it and run it through a sock that s gotta dry no just give me the fucking reefer I d rather I like smoking blunts but that s what gave me pneumonia last summer
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I started smoking blunts.
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Yeah?
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Sure enough.
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It gave you pneumonia?
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Pneumonia.
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Really?
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I had pneumonia last summer.
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Do you think it s definitely from that?
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It was that and the sleep ... What was ... It was a bunch of shit.
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What it really was was I had an abscess.
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Oh.
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And the sleep mask.
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Oh.
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I cleaned that motherfucker for 20 years.
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Abscesses are dangerous.
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Dog, this was ... I m shooting a fucking movie with Kevin.
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And it blew.
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Oh, really?
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In my mouth as I was shooting Kevin.
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Oh, you had no idea?
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No, I m spitting blood and pus and I m like, oh, and then I started feeling sick.
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Oh, no.
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Thank God we rapped.
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Thank God we rapped.
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I m fucking, I m like, I m not going to make it home.
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I couldn t even drive.
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I got home, I went right to sleep.
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The next day I got up and went right to the doctor.
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And that started, you know, because doctors aren t... Now they send you to 20 different places.
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So by the time you get there... You know what this started with the pneumonia?
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What?
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They saw a fucking thing in my kidney.
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What s that when you have a... Kidney stones?
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Kidney stone.
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Yeah.
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They go, we got to start drinking whatever.
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I m like, kidney stones?
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Yeah.
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Then I went to another doctor and he s like, you re not a kidney stone.
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There s something wrong with the bottom of your lung.
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Oh.
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And there s a cyst in your heart.
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Assists something that kept growing over the years like a little boil by one of the valves.
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Oh, all right Then he sent me for another one then finally Eisenberg fucking sent me to the real deal and he goes this eliminates everything When I left there, I thought he s gonna say we re gonna put in a stent and all this shit.
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He goes no just aspirin That s ready to go on a baby aspirin.
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Really?
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That s it.
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He goes your heart s perfect.
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You re good.
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That s it
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My calcium score was good, which was very fucking surprising.
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I stopped eating bacon in the mornings.
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I d do an avocado toast instead.
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I d rather do avocado toast with an egg and a bowl of fruit.
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I used to eat a cheese omelette with french fries.
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with 10 pieces of bread with butter on it.
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So this works.
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This is better.
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This works.
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That s definitely better.
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Get them healthy fats.
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Yeah.
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How good is that sushi place you went to?
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Oh my God.
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Shout out to Yuki Hand Roll.
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Jesus Christ.
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The fucking, when you got up to go to the bathroom is when he dropped my roll.
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I m like, whose is this?
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It was just a fucking, a chunk.
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And especially now with this new economics, that sushi s getting smaller and smaller and smaller.
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It is in a lot of places.
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This fucking, there was two hunks of fucking tuna there.
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I m full big they give you big pieces at Yuki and the guy came from Nobu super sweet guy really nice you guys are put together a hell of a fucking time remember we ve been coming here since 19 and we used to come here we used to go to Papa Do s yep
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And, uh, well, there was another place we went to.
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The Mexican joint, Papacitos, and that s it.
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And that was where we went for three fucking days.
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Now look what you got here.
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It s like an empire of everything.
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You guys were talking in the green room last night about all the different restaurants.
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You guys didn t stop.
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So many people moved here.
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Didn t stop.
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You guys did not.
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Everybody had a suggestion.
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How about this place?
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You ask for a steak here, eight people raise their hand.
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Mexican food.
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Go to that place that s fusion or whatever.
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There s so many good steakhouses in town that people forget.
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You know, you go, oh, you got J. Carver s, right.
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Perry s, Perry s, Bob s, Bob s.
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There s excitement down there.
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Three Forks, Three Forks.
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It s very exciting.
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You know, last two nights, the store in its heyday,
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like 2019, 2018, I gotta be honest with you.
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I would do my spots and I would have to go to the kitchen and sit in the corner by myself.
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And I would just watch to think that this was really happening.
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Yeah.
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Because it would assault all your, like, it was just so much.
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It was celebrities.
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Yeah.
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I remember one night, half of UFC was there.
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Yeah.
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You know, like, you look around, there s fucking eight guys in the UFC right there.
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And you re like, what the fuck is happening up here?
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What the fuck?
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All these people, you know.
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The last two nights, I had to leave early.
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And I, you go home and you can t sleep.
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Yeah.
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Last night when you text me, I was awake.
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I got home at fucking 11.
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I couldn t sleep from everything.
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I was writing and fucking thinking and coming on his head.
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You know, it s what stand-up does to you at night.
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It s, you know, you can t not be a fucking early riser with stand-up.
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Because even if you do an 8 o clock show, unless you re a fucking mope, you re thinking about that set.
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Yeah.
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Even when you re eating with your friends, you know where you went weak tonight, even though you did great.
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That one joke didn t work, you re thinking about how you can make it better.
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That s what I missed.
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I didn t miss the planes, I didn t miss the hotels.
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I missed having four ideas and starting to get on stage and trying to connect those four ideas together.
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And when those four ideas get connected together, I m just saying, four ideas, three different premises.
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It s the best feeling, it s better than sex.
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It s better than sex.
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And that s what I missed.
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Everything else I didn t look at.
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The age and all, no.
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Well, there s a relationship with the audience that s so pure.
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Because, you know, they know you.
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Like, they really know you.
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They know you from podcasts.
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They know you from your bits.
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They fucking know you.
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They know you from conversations.
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They get it.
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Then they re watching you put together this thing That s really for them.
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It s for you because you create it and you know You get paid to say it and you get this great feeling that you did it but for a person like a fan Like when I was watching you last night as a fan like I had to see much shit that you were doing that I was telling you was killing me, but it s
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It s a beautiful feeling.
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It s a great feeling when someone that you really love is really who s really funny who s got new stuff and they re killing it and it s just like this this atmosphere so there s 250 people we re all sharing this moment.
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So it s super positive in like all ways.
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It makes people feel better.
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They leave that place, they feel better.
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And so when you know that you can do that, then you get together in the green room afterwards, you re like, ah, this one bit, there s like something missing.
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It s fucking, there s something clunky about it.
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It just feels fake.
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It feels like it s too, I gotta rework it, I gotta rework it.
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And then you start from scratch and you figure it out.
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But it s just because you wanna get to that place where the fan, the audience is like,
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Yes!
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Ah!
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You hit them with some shit they didn t see coming, or they get to see some shit that maybe you did six months ago, but now it s tight.
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It s tighter.
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Yeah.
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Now it s got all these new punchlines and new avenues that you can take it to.
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The worst is when you, three years later, and you get a bit and you re like, you know what?
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I wish I could use that bit now.
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Right.
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That bit I did three years ago fits right in here now, but if I bring it up, people are going to know I m doing old jokes.
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Yeah, but sometimes just shove it in there anyway.
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Who cares?
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Just because it fits.
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It s perfect.
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It s funny.
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The whole idea is just be as funny as possible.
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You re always supposed to be coming up with new material for sure, but, you know, I don t mind when somebody busts out an old bit.
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The other night when I got here, I landed at 11.30.
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I got my luggage by quarter to 12, I walked out.
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When I got in that car, you should have seen that headboard.
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It was alive at midnight.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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Fucking tons of people coming into Austin.
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I mean, I was like, this has changed a lot.
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This airport used to be a sleepy fucking hollow.
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Yeah, the whole town.
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The pandemic changed the whole town.
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You know, and then a lot of the tech companies moved here, too.
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That was a big part of it.
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A lot of these young people just didn t want any part of San Francisco anymore.
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They re like, we got to get the fuck out of here.
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SPEAKER_01
Who would want to live there?
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SPEAKER_01
Who would want to live there?
1
SPEAKER_01
It s dangerous.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s weird.
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SPEAKER_01
You know, Elon was saying five of his friends have been assaulted or robbed.
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SPEAKER_01
Five.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can t lock your car?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you gotta leave your car open.
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SPEAKER_00
Window open because they re gonna smash it.
1
SPEAKER_00
How do you live like that?
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
They basically empowered mental patients who are drug addicts to just live on the street and shit everywhere and harass people.
1
SPEAKER_01
And there s no sign that they re turning it around.
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SPEAKER_01
They don t seem to be turning it around at all, except for when Xi Jinping came to town.
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SPEAKER_01
I told him if I was the mayor, I d buy Xi Jinping a condo.
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SPEAKER_01
When he s in town, everything s clean.
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SPEAKER_01
When he came to San Francisco, they moved all the tents.
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SPEAKER_01
They put up fences so people couldn t put tents back up.
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SPEAKER_01
They cleaned the streets.
1
SPEAKER_01
And Gavin Newsom was like, well, when you have guests come over, you clean up your house.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, what?
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SPEAKER_01
What a crazy gaslighting spin on a fact that you could have fixed this the whole time, and you chose not to until the dictator comes to town.
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SPEAKER_00
You know, in my criminal heyday, I used to move around a lot, and I ended up in San Francisco, August of 85.
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SPEAKER_00
I was in Boulder.
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The cops were looking for me.
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SPEAKER_00
And I said, fuck it, where do I go?
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SPEAKER_00
I went to the airport, and I picked the spot.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I go, what s the closest flight here, leaving San Francisco?
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SPEAKER_00
All right, get me to San Francisco.
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SPEAKER_00
And I went up there.
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And I went right to the Tenderloin Joe.
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SPEAKER_00
And it was buck wild.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, for a New York City kid to look at you and go, you got to be careful down there.
1
SPEAKER_00
I still remember in 1985, they had a place called Coffee Ron s that was a topless coffee place.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
With the ugliest titties you ve ever seen in your fucking life.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, they weren t award-winning titties.
1
SPEAKER_00
Soggy, they looked like a puppy was gonna milk on them, but they had that.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
And they were open 24 hours, right down the block from me.
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SPEAKER_00
It was a wild city.
1
SPEAKER_00
It was wild.
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SPEAKER_00
And up the corner were hookers for fucking miles.
1
SPEAKER_01
It had a stand-up scene, but it never had a stand-up scene like Boston or New York or LA.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, but it was a good stand-up scene.
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SPEAKER_00
Solid scene.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Robin Williams came out of there.
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SPEAKER_01
Who else?
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SPEAKER_00
Slayton.
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SPEAKER_00
We were just talking about him, the Korean girl.
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SPEAKER_00
She s from San Francisco.
1
SPEAKER_00
Margaret Kim?
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SPEAKER_00
Margaret Cho.
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SPEAKER_00
Margaret Cho.
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SPEAKER_00
Her mother had a bookstore downstairs or something.
1
SPEAKER_00
A couple funny guys came out of Frisco.
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SPEAKER_00
Sorry, Margaret.
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SPEAKER_00
The comedy festival really was great.
1
SPEAKER_00
It really did a lot for a lot of... I never went to that one.
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SPEAKER_00
I did it.
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SPEAKER_00
I quit.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah?
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SPEAKER_00
Four nights.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, what am I doing?
1
SPEAKER_00
I m sleeping on the beach.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m paying for my own hotel, and the judges are comedians from San Francisco.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I m coming in fucking 12th every night, because they don t know me.
1
SPEAKER_00
These guys are coming in first.
1
SPEAKER_00
You know, the judges are hugging them, smoking dope with them.
1
SPEAKER_00
Wait, what year was this that you did it?
1
SPEAKER_00
97-ish, 98.
1
SPEAKER_00
I drove home.
1
SPEAKER_00
I went to the comedy store.
1
SPEAKER_00
They let me go up, and I went to the House of Blues and saw Celia Cruz.
1
SPEAKER_00
instead of fucking, I left Thursday night.
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SPEAKER_00
I used to make blues, used to be the shit.
1
SPEAKER_00
The shit.
1
SPEAKER_00
We used to go across the street and watch killer bands.
1
SPEAKER_00
Fucking unbelievable freak.
1
SPEAKER_00
It was amazing.
1
SPEAKER_01
Just walk in, come on over.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they just let us in.
1
SPEAKER_00
It was amazing.
1
SPEAKER_00
I went to see one of my mother s friends there.
1
SPEAKER_00
My mother s friend was this Cuban dude, Patato Totico.
1
SPEAKER_00
They re huge in Cuba.
1
SPEAKER_00
And he was playing there by himself.
1
SPEAKER_00
He had to be like 70.
1
SPEAKER_01
But before I forget, what is your cousin s band in Cuba?
1
SPEAKER_01
That band.
1
SPEAKER_01
Eme Alfonso.
1
SPEAKER_01
Eme.
1
SPEAKER_01
Eme Alfonso.
1
SPEAKER_01
She had some new shit.
1
SPEAKER_01
She was just here.
1
SPEAKER_01
She came down for- I want to put them on the Spotify list.
1
SPEAKER_01
This shit is banging, but I couldn t remember.
1
SPEAKER_00
She came here for fucking South by Southwest.
1
SPEAKER_00
Really?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
She was in South by Southwest.
1
SPEAKER_01
How do you say it?
1
SPEAKER_01
How do you spell it?
1
SPEAKER_00
Eme.
1
SPEAKER_00
E-M-E.
1
SPEAKER_00
E-M-M-Y?
1
SPEAKER_00
E-M-E.
1
SPEAKER_00
E-M-E?
1
SPEAKER_00
A-L-F-Y.
1
SPEAKER_00
Alfonso, A-L-F-O-N-S-O.
1
SPEAKER_00
Got it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Bam.
1
SPEAKER_00
There it is.
1
SPEAKER_00
Can you believe that s my family up there?
1
SPEAKER_00
The Instagram shot at the top?
1
SPEAKER_00
What s a good song that I should put on the Spotify playlist?
1
SPEAKER_00
That s my family, bro.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s my legitimate fucking family.
1
SPEAKER_00
That guy on the far...
1
SPEAKER_00
Left is my mother s brother.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s his son that owns La Factoria in Cuba, the big club where you go to.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s his sister and that s my aunt.
1
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_00
That dude is 80 years old and he s still a musician, plays congas.
1
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_00
You know, the whole fucking thing.
1
SPEAKER_00
Emi lives in... no, Eki, the guy with the dreads, my cousin.
1
SPEAKER_00
He lives like in fucking Germany or some shit.
1
SPEAKER_00
Really?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he don t even go to Cuba.
1
SPEAKER_00
He goes to Cuba to pick up a check or something like that.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is he allowed to go in and out?
1
SPEAKER_00
He s a band member.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
1
SPEAKER_01
He just says he s playing in a band and fucking... Give me a... What song should I pick for this playlist?
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
1
SPEAKER_00
How s Keep Your Head Up?
1
No.
1
SPEAKER_00
The one that you really liked that time was the one when she s walking.
1
SPEAKER_00
Which one s that?
1
SPEAKER_01
All right, let s all screenshot this.
1
SPEAKER_01
I ll come back to it later.
1
SPEAKER_01
I ll put some of them on the spot.
1
SPEAKER_00
And while I got you, can we look at the car?
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Steven Seagal in the movie with the Jamaicans.
1
SPEAKER_01
Jamie s Joey screwhead.
1
SPEAKER_01
Jamie said he had a 69 Mach one.
1
SPEAKER_01
I didn t say 69.
1
SPEAKER_01
I didn t know what he said.
1
SPEAKER_01
Mach one.
1
SPEAKER_01
He said MAC.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, that s probably a Mach one.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s an old muscle car, right?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yes, sir.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s probably
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah, that s a 70.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s a 70.
2
SPEAKER_02
I like that show.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s a nice car.
2
SPEAKER_02
How fast is that?
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, it s fast as fuck.
2
SPEAKER_02
They handle like shit.
2
SPEAKER_02
But that s the 69.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s the one John Wick had.
2
SPEAKER_02
The 70, it s not quite as good looking.
2
SPEAKER_02
But still, great fucking car.
2
SPEAKER_02
I forgot about this scene.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, they crushed it with two trucks.
2
SPEAKER_02
Damn it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I forgot the name of this movie, but it s god awful.
2
SPEAKER_00
Mark for death.
2
SPEAKER_00
Mark for death.
2
SPEAKER_00
Screw face.
2
SPEAKER_00
This movie s so bad.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s really bad.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then he kills him, then he comes back from life.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m like, all right, that s it.
2
SPEAKER_00
He kills him and he comes back from the dead, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
Screw head, screw face or something, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, he lights him on fire and he has to escape.
2
SPEAKER_01
This is so dumb.
2
SPEAKER_02
Well, this is skinny Steven Seagal.
2
SPEAKER_02
These are at least more believable music movies until they went completely sideways Sorry, he s gonna sneak out.
2
SPEAKER_02
He s gonna get out the guy with the tractor never crushes him Goddamn, Tom Segura s got to stop sending me videos Tom s here or something.
2
SPEAKER_02
He s this video this dude Smushing somebody with a tractor running running the tractor right through him.
2
SPEAKER_02
I don t want to see that shit I don t want to see it either but Tom Segura thinks I do I
2
SPEAKER_02
Every day we freak each other out.
2
SPEAKER_02
I find the worst shit that I see on Instagram.
2
SPEAKER_02
By the way, Instagram is wild right now.
2
SPEAKER_02
I mean, buck wild with murder and animal attacks and bombs exploding on people and terrorist attacks and riots.
2
SPEAKER_02
And it s like you can find everything on Instagram now.
2
SPEAKER_02
And these are accounts that I don t even follow.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they know my brain is a mess.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they re just sending me the most horrible shit.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I just get it all day long.
2
SPEAKER_00
I saved one just for you.
2
SPEAKER_00
The only, we can watch it, the only fucking thing that amazes me about Instagram, I don t know what s going on.
2
SPEAKER_00
But if you go to like look, this section here, break it down for me.
2
SPEAKER_00
The explore section, the search.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is that there?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
I still can t put together these women.
2
SPEAKER_00
Are they hookers?
2
SPEAKER_00
Are they just showing their bodies?
2
SPEAKER_02
First of all, some of them, look at this one.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that, like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
What are they doing?
2
SPEAKER_02
They got fake babies.
2
SPEAKER_02
They got fake babies.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they pull their tits out to breastfeed fake babies.
2
SPEAKER_02
So it s like a hack.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they could, what s that?
2
SPEAKER_02
Link in bio.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you go in that bio, bam.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then there s a, it s probably an OnlyFans.
2
SPEAKER_02
And let s see, 18 plus, yes we are.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then, love me, it s a different one.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, it s a dating.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, you re done.
2
SPEAKER_02
You have a virus on your computer right now.
2
SPEAKER_02
We need to blow up that computer.
2
SPEAKER_02
We ll take that computer to the range.
2
SPEAKER_02
Fill it full of lead.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they just rope you in.
2
SPEAKER_02
They get lonely, lost guys, and they see this girl breastfeeding a rubber baby, and they dump... I mean, that s how Andrew Tate made all his money.
2
SPEAKER_02
Coming in hot.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bunch of titties.
2
SPEAKER_00
Lots of titties.
2
SPEAKER_00
Then they got the other girls that flip the camera around and show their monkey and then show their face.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I can t figure out what the fuck that s about either.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m like, why are they doing this?
2
SPEAKER_00
They show their face and they flip it.
2
SPEAKER_00
They show their underwear monkey and then they flip back and they start talking to you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m like, why are they doing that?
2
SPEAKER_02
Only fans.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they re trying to get you to go to their website, or OnlyFans, or whatever that website was.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s just a bunch of girls that get hired, I m sure, I m guessing, but this is what I imagine, they get hired by an agency, or some company, and they put a fake name to them, and they say, link in bio, you go to the link in the bio, and you go to some porn site, or you go to some dating site, or you go to some OnlyFans type site.
2
SPEAKER_02
and lost guys who don t have any money, or they don t have anybody with them, they re sad, they give up all their cash.
2
SPEAKER_02
They get hundreds of thousands of dollars off these dopes.
2
SPEAKER_02
And the way Andrew Tate was doing it, he would have the girls sit in front of the keyboard, typing with their tits out, and then him and his friends would be over on the side, and they would be typing all the shit, because they knew what the guy wanted to hear.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they would type all the things to the guy, and the guys would just donate money.
2
SPEAKER_02
And they were making millions.
2
SPEAKER_02
Millions.
2
SPEAKER_02
That is crazy.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s crazy.
2
SPEAKER_02
But, you know, it s one of those things where there s certain kind of scams where I think they should be legal.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like televangelists.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like late night preachers.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s so obvious it should be legal.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like if they re getting you with that, I don t have a problem.
2
SPEAKER_02
I ve never called for like the banning of televangelists.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like, you know, when they re like, God told me I need a private jet.
2
SPEAKER_02
There s no way I can do the Lord s Duty flying commercial.
2
SPEAKER_02
And these guys, they ll fucking sell it.
2
SPEAKER_02
They ll sell it.
2
SPEAKER_02
This one guy was telling people that if they re broke, if they have no money, if they just send whatever they can, everything they have, God will bless them with 10 times more.
2
SPEAKER_02
He just kept saying that.
2
SPEAKER_02
So he was trying to get people that literally had nothing.
2
SPEAKER_02
And if you send me, the guy in the $5,000 suit with the big pinky ring, if you send me your money, whatever you have left, God will bless you 10 times over.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t believe the banning of anybody who could take money out of your pocket.
2
SPEAKER_00
Do you know that?
2
SPEAKER_00
Because if you re that fucking stupid, it s like, who raised you?
2
SPEAKER_02
It gets to a certain level where I m like, OK, wait a minute.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like financial market stuff.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like when people are pulling stock schemes and pumping dumps and things like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s different.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s different.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s different.
2
SPEAKER_02
Then you re actually getting intelligent people.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like Bernie Madoff.
2
SPEAKER_02
You re actually getting intelligent people.
2
SPEAKER_02
That fucking robbed you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they just trusted you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m talking about like when an African sends you a text message and says, fucking, come bail me out.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you send me 500, you re going to inherit $80 million.
2
SPEAKER_00
You know how many people get, every year, 60 Minutes has a fucking expose about some African that s taking money from fucking people, and they keep doing it.
2
SPEAKER_02
Speaking of which, I should probably bring this up.
2
SPEAKER_02
There s a lot of people that are getting emails from a scammer saying that they re being invited onto this podcast.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, they are.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
A dear friend of mine keeps asking me, what the fuck is this about?
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, hundreds of people.
2
SPEAKER_02
I don t know how many people have been contacted.
2
SPEAKER_02
And it s more than one account that s doing it.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I think it s some sort of a scam to get your Facebook information or some sort of information or credit card information or something.
2
SPEAKER_02
Don t do it.
2
SPEAKER_02
Don t do it.
2
SPEAKER_02
Don t do it.
2
SPEAKER_02
We will never ask you for anything like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
And if we contact you, it ll be obvious.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s obvious also that whoever the person is writing these things, at least in the ones that have been sent to me, it seems like English is their second language.
2
SPEAKER_02
They don t seem to know exactly how to phrase things in a way that an American would phrase things.
2
SPEAKER_02
So it seemed a little obvious to me that it was shifty and obvious to a lot of other people, but a bunch of people sent them to me.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, yeah, because I had one I was going to show you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I think I erased it.
2
SPEAKER_00
He sent it to me yesterday.
2
SPEAKER_00
And he was like, yeah, ask them.
2
SPEAKER_00
They keep sending me these fucking things.
2
SPEAKER_00
from the Joe Rogan experience, he doesn t know.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s just scammers.
2
SPEAKER_02
You know, they reach out to you through Instagram, or, you know, they find out you follow me, or maybe I talked about you on the podcast, or maybe something like that, and the next thing you know, you get a letter.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
There s scammers out there, man.
2
SPEAKER_02
I mean, the Nigerians are the best at it.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s where it was invented.
2
SPEAKER_02
They re the best at it.
2
SPEAKER_00
They are the best.
2
SPEAKER_02
When did they first start email scamming people?
2
SPEAKER_02
Probably right after email got invented.
2
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_02
When was the first Nigerian Prince email scams?
2
SPEAKER_02
Because it s always like, I have all this money, but I need $1,000 to get it out.
2
SPEAKER_00
$500 to get it out.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you help me get it out, you get $10 million.
2
SPEAKER_00
I can t get mad at you for some reason.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because you look at that and you giggle.
2
SPEAKER_00
You look at that and you giggle.
2
SPEAKER_00
Any of that stuff online, you have to look up.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t press nothing online.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you send me a Facebook message and I click on something, I don t click.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t touch it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Good.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t open it.
2
SPEAKER_00
When that shit starts happening, when things start popping up, that s when I turn off the computer.
2
SPEAKER_00
I hit a button that I should not fucking hit.
2
SPEAKER_00
Fuck you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t go into any of those things.
2
SPEAKER_00
Even friends of mine that send me shit, I m busy.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s smart.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
Wow the Nigerian started in the 1900s 1910 yeah the origins of the Nigerian print scam date back to 1910 when it went by another name the Spanish prisoner swindle
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, back then victims receive a message as a letter in the mail rather than on the internet.
2
SPEAKER_02
But the same basic structure between the two scams remains the same.
2
SPEAKER_02
Between both scams remains scams remain the same.
2
SPEAKER_02
The Spanish prisoner swindle centers around a wealthy foreign nobleman who is in prison for political reasons.
2
SPEAKER_02
The nobleman claims
3
SPEAKER_01
claims to know the location of a lost treasure and that he s willing to share this treasure with the victim.
3
SPEAKER_01
The problem is he s in prison and needs the victim to send him money so he can bribe his way out. 
3
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
There s always been people like that, but you know what the problem is?
3
SPEAKER_01
The problem is, there are people in this country, what was the number that we googled that have an IQ lower than 85?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s pretty high.
3
SPEAKER_01
15% so imagine 15% of people that you could basically trick with anything get him to join a cult get him to sign up for some fucking telemarketing swindle you think it s IQ or do you think it s IQ is interesting right because IQ doesn t necessarily mean intelligence because it depends upon your education because some of the questions in IQ tests are predicated on a knowledge of math and understanding of like
3
SPEAKER_01
how to do equations and certain things that you learn in school.
3
SPEAKER_01
But there s intelligence that is social intelligence, intelligence in terms of being able to see what the problems are in a certain choice you make or what the up benefits are of a different choice.
3
SPEAKER_01
There s people that are strategizers and they re really good at like,
3
SPEAKER_01
business, they re really good at figuring people out, they re really good at figuring themselves out, there s an intelligence to that.
3
SPEAKER_01
So the problem with IQ, in my mind, I know a lot of people with very high IQs, but their life is a clumsy mess.
3
SPEAKER_01
So it s like, it really is dependent upon what is the mental horsepower you have, and how are you applying that mental horsepower?
3
SPEAKER_01
Are you Gary Clark Jr.
3
SPEAKER_01
and applying that mental horsepower to music, and you re a genius, but you re a genius in music?
3
SPEAKER_01
Or are you Lex Friedman, and you re making artificial intelligence and coding robots?
3
SPEAKER_01
Are you Elon Musk?
3
SPEAKER_01
You re making spaceships.
3
SPEAKER_01
What are you doing with this intelligence?
3
SPEAKER_01
So IQ, there s limitations of it, but at least it s an indicator of how smart a person is.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s an indicator.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s not the only indicator.
3
SPEAKER_01
There s other factors that I think are much more intangible.
3
SPEAKER_01
They re much harder to measure and weigh.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s my take on it.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think it means something.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think if your parents opened up your eyes,
3
SPEAKER_00
Something, you know, it s like I do that bit and it s true.
3
SPEAKER_00
I really do.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m mad at my guidance counselor I really am deep down inside because You know, he was telling you all about those job possibilities and college possibilities But you don t even forgot to tell us about New York being right across the river.
3
I
3
SPEAKER_00
and all the possibilities you had over there.
3
SPEAKER_00
I would have done this shit earlier.
3
SPEAKER_00
You mean stand-up?
3
SPEAKER_01
Everything.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would have tried anything earlier.
3
SPEAKER_01
The thing is, no one s ever going to advise that you take the riskiest chance in show business.
3
SPEAKER_00
No one s ever going to advise that you... I didn t want to be a show business guy, but I wish you would have told me.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, if you want to take acting lessons, you go to the city.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s show business.
3
SPEAKER_00
I didn t know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I didn t know that fucking... When I d watch a movie, I thought you just walked on the fucking thing and they gave you a part.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s how stupid I was when I was young.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s not stupid.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s uninformed.
3
SPEAKER_00
I thought when a stand-up did a special...
3
SPEAKER_00
I thought he just showed up.
3
SPEAKER_00
And he had a camera, and he goes, I m ready.
3
SPEAKER_00
And that s what I thought.
3
SPEAKER_00
I didn t think any, you know, I didn t really know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m mad that he didn t open up.
3
SPEAKER_00
I see the kids I grew up with.
3
SPEAKER_00
You got to see the people around you.
3
SPEAKER_00
And some of us saw some things, and some of us didn t.
3
SPEAKER_00
Some of us saw a path that was different than just getting a job and working 40 years and getting a watch, you know?
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t think they opened up our minds to that stuff.
3
SPEAKER_00
There was a lot of stuff that we didn t... In my house, she would fucking tell... Like, my mother was crazy.
3
SPEAKER_00
When I was six, she would put a fucking gold chain on me that belonged to a man.
3
SPEAKER_00
And she d make me put it out and she d go, I want you to walk the streets like that.
3
SPEAKER_00
So somebody fucks you, you, you, you know, I mean, and I would, now I think about these stories and I go, what was she doing?
3
SPEAKER_01
Right.
3
SPEAKER_01
Why was she getting you to go outside with a valuable piece of jewelry around your neck as a little kid?
3
SPEAKER_00
I remember one night I was getting ice cream on 88th street and the gold chain was hanging.
3
SPEAKER_00
And when I went to get the cone from Mr. Softy, he goes, that s a nice chain.
3
SPEAKER_00
And he looked at it.
3
SPEAKER_00
My mother was watching from the window.
3
SPEAKER_00
She was like, punch him in the fucking face.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m like, eight.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m like, eight.
3
SPEAKER_00
Don t let nobody touch your face.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, she was... She just did things, you know?
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, don t go in the car with people.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, just general shit that they banged into your fucking head.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, that s good.
3
SPEAKER_00
All that stuff s good.
3
SPEAKER_00
I was out there.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like, I was out there every fucking day, you know?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s a different kind of intelligence, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Street smarts.
3
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely.
3
SPEAKER_00
Absolutely.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s also informed.
3
SPEAKER_01
You re informed.
3
SPEAKER_01
You re informed about the dangers of your environment.
3
SPEAKER_01
And some people, if they grow up in the suburbs and they go to really nice schools, they re lost in those environments.
3
SPEAKER_01
They don t understand the rules.
3
SPEAKER_01
Talk, I m worried about kids today.
3
SPEAKER_00
You should be.
3
SPEAKER_00
Listen.
3
SPEAKER_00
My I didn t know this.
3
SPEAKER_00
I just spoke to somebody in my old neighborhood and we were talking about something They go you should see the neighborhood at 230 Fucking you can t drive and I go why she goes McKinley school where I went.
3
SPEAKER_00
She goes the parents pick him up with cars I go.
3
SPEAKER_00
What are you talking about?
3
SPEAKER_00
We walked those streets home.
3
SPEAKER_00
There was just three blocks a block from the neighborhood.
3
SPEAKER_00
She goes not anymore
3
SPEAKER_00
Those kids don t walk those streets at all.
3
SPEAKER_00
And they live right there.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it s not like across town.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, you know, you got to get those kids out.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they gotta get out of the house, for sure.
3
SPEAKER_01
We gotta get them out.
3
SPEAKER_01
How many kids are just at home playing video games?
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, it drives me fucking crazy when my daughter goes knocking on people s door, and they re like, no, well, they re inside playing video games.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know, it s 70 fucking degrees out.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I just call Mr. Softee.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s on his way.
3
SPEAKER_00
What the fuck?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I got Mr. Softee s number in my neighborhood.
3
SPEAKER_00
First time I met him, I gave him an edible, and he s like, where you at?
3
SPEAKER_00
And I told him.
3
SPEAKER_00
Does it ring?
3
SPEAKER_00
Does it ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding?
3
SPEAKER_00
But he comes too early.
3
SPEAKER_00
He comes at four.
3
SPEAKER_00
People still, you know, they re still at work.
3
SPEAKER_00
But when that motherfucker comes, Mr. Softy, I would give him edibles, those ABX edibles, and tell him, put them in my milkshake.
3
SPEAKER_00
And he blended in the milkshake.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s hilarious.
3
SPEAKER_00
So, you know.
3
SPEAKER_00
Intelligence?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, like, I know a lot of people are fucking smart, but they make mistakes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they make big decisions.
3
SPEAKER_01
You go, what the fuck?
3
SPEAKER_01
In your life, you know, relationship decisions, business decisions, yeah, friendship decisions.
3
SPEAKER_01
Intelligence is complicated.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s very complicated.
3
SPEAKER_01
But the point is, some people, their mental horsepower is very low.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s not a matter of what they apply themselves to.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s a matter of they don t have the resources.
3
SPEAKER_01
Their brain doesn t work good.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I ve met a lot of people like that, and I know you have too, where you re like, this guy ain t never going to be a genius.
3
SPEAKER_01
There s like, there s no inspiration in him.
3
SPEAKER_01
There s nothing enthusiastic.
3
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t have a thing he s really into.
3
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t have a thing he likes.
3
SPEAKER_01
He s just dull, dull minded for whatever reason.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if it s genetics.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if it s just a roll of the dice or maybe the way he was raised.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_01
But some people just, they don t have a good brain.
3
SPEAKER_01
They just don t so those guys they get that fucking Nigerian Prince email like this is it.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is my ticket out of here Scraping up coins Putting quarters and rolls bringing them to the bank I believe in faith like if you re broke and you go put two dollars in a picket ticket because there s a 175 billion dollar I believe in that I believe in all that type of stuff Joe But that s the biggest scam in the world.
3
SPEAKER_00
What s that lottery?
3
SPEAKER_00
I?
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, I m not talking, even when I was a kid, the numbers.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s three numbers.
3
SPEAKER_00
You put $5, you win $2,500, OK?
3
SPEAKER_00
And those are small.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know in the 70s and 60s and the black communities, the Spanish communities, Italian communities, that s a way of hope.
3
SPEAKER_00
Your Sicilian grandmother wakes up one morning and says, oh my god, I had a dream about peppers.
3
SPEAKER_00
Peppers.
3
SPEAKER_00
And all of a sudden your grandmother yells, peppers, that s 68.
3
SPEAKER_00
And all of a sudden, you re like, put a prefix on it, 568.
3
SPEAKER_00
And you know, this is your trip to Italy.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is your chance to buy your son a car.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s like that little fate that you have.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it s something that you have a chance at.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s fun, too.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
The same thing is the problem with drinking, the same thing is the problem with everything else, is that people lose their fucking minds.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s an excess.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then it becomes everything.
3
SPEAKER_01
I told you about my grandmother, right, with the numbers?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wasn t she a loan shark, too?
3
SPEAKER_01
She went to jail.
3
SPEAKER_01
My grandmother went to jail for six months because she wouldn t route out the people that were running the numbers.
3
SPEAKER_01
In Newark?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wouldn t go to visit grandma.
3
SPEAKER_01
Where s grandma?
3
SPEAKER_01
Grandma s visiting Aunt Josie.
3
SPEAKER_01
She s been at Aunt Josie for six months.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was ridiculous.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, she was knitting for the fucking guards in prison, and she wouldn t rat.
3
SPEAKER_01
So they put her away for six months.
3
SPEAKER_00
For bookmaking.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
So those immigrants, those people with dreams, I see that.
3
SPEAKER_00
But somebody just fucking calling you and going, hey, if you lend me five hours, or a 10-letter evangelist, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m even like I hate to say this in public, but I m down on like fucking charities and shit Well, they don t get the fucking money unless you donate the st.
4
SPEAKER_02
Jude or something like that You know some guys driving a BMW.
4
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm and the people I sent the money to You know and it s happened to us.
4
SPEAKER_02
We saw it we gave money and nothing happens and you re like what the fuck guys and
4
SPEAKER_02
So now you just give it direct.
4
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever seen those charts that show what the money you give to charity, how much actually goes to the cause?
4
SPEAKER_01
How much of it is just overhead?
4
SPEAKER_01
In some places, it s like 90%.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s ridiculous.
4
SPEAKER_01
So it s like 10% of the money goes to the charity.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s a very inefficient thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then you have things where the people that are running it are making enormous salaries.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they re like, look at the Black Lives Matter thing, where the girls are buying $6 million houses.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, what the fuck are you doing?
4
SPEAKER_01
What the fuck are you doing?
4
SPEAKER_01
What are you doing?
4
SPEAKER_01
And like, oh, we use this for events.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s just that happens with so many charities and so many Charitable organizations and then there s charitable organizations like there s foundations that are set up just as tax breaks So there s like tax breaks involved if you have a foundation It s a charitable foundation that works towards good causes like maybe climate change or maybe you know something along those lines health
4
SPEAKER_01
you know, the global health, and then you get involved in that, and it s a nice way to avoid paying taxes, you move money around, you put money in the foundation, you kind of move it around, you know, it s these guys that are involved in charitable organizations.
4
SPEAKER_01
The thought behind it is beautiful.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like, wouldn t it be great if people donated all this money to charity and we could fix a lot of things, but what you re really doing in a lot of ways is you re pumping up the business of these charities.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they pump up their advertising revenue.
4
SPEAKER_01
They pump up their social media profile, their campaigns, their this, their that.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they get co-opted.
4
SPEAKER_01
They get co-opted by companies, corporations, pharmaceutical companies, different mandates and narratives that they d like to promote.
4
SPEAKER_01
And next thing you know, charitable organizations are a part of the propaganda machine.
4
SPEAKER_01
And it s all being funded by enormous amounts of money.
4
SPEAKER_01
And most of that money does not go to the actual cause itself.
4
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever seen the charts?
4
SPEAKER_01
Pull up a chart of where the money goes.
4
SPEAKER_01
See if there s a good chart that shows various, like Red Cross, all these different ones.
4
SPEAKER_02
I bumped into a nun once when I was going to Catholic school.
4
SPEAKER_02
And she told me that when people are looking for you for help, like when they re on the side of the street and they re asking you for help, that that could be Jesus in disguise.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I fucked my world up.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I started donating as a kid.
4
SPEAKER_02
The first person I donated to was the black kid with the flies on him that they sent you the picture.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, Sally Struthers.
4
SPEAKER_02
He wrote a letter.
4
SPEAKER_02
Kinnison had that bit about it.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I never got nothing after that.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m writing letters.
4
SPEAKER_02
Nobody s writing me back.
4
SPEAKER_02
I want to know if the kid made it to the sixth grade.
4
SPEAKER_02
I was so fucking pissed as a kid.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I would do the Heart Association walks.
4
SPEAKER_02
Like, that was my shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
And trust me, I skimmed off the top.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m not gonna lie to you.
4
SPEAKER_02
Because I would go to my mother s bar and I d make them give me like 10 bucks a mile.
4
SPEAKER_02
Come on.
4
SPEAKER_02
Right.
4
SPEAKER_02
You know, I would show up with like $3,000 and think I was a good kid.
4
SPEAKER_02
Finally, like after like the third year, I m like, they re gonna get light this year.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m making $3,000 fucking dollars here.
4
SPEAKER_01
So look at the Red Cross.
4
SPEAKER_01
What s that?
4
SPEAKER_00
Add it on a better website.
4
SPEAKER_01
That wasn t too bad.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s pretty small though.
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh shit.
4
SPEAKER_01
Let s see what we got here.
4
SPEAKER_01
What percentage?
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so this shows you all the money that comes in and how much of it actually goes to programs and how much of it goes to administration and how much of it goes to fundraising.
4
SPEAKER_01
So Red Cross looks pretty fucking good.
4
SPEAKER_01
Red Cross shows it s like 90% of the money goes to programs.
4
SPEAKER_01
Only
4
SPEAKER_01
3.5% goes to administrative and 6% goes to fundraising.
4
SPEAKER_01
So this is what we donated to.
4
SPEAKER_01
Remember when we did those shows in San Diego right after the fire?
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, we can t take money from these people.
4
SPEAKER_01
They just had this massive fire.
4
SPEAKER_01
Let s just donate all the money.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we donated the money to Red Cross because that seemed to be the best one.
4
SPEAKER_01
St.
4
SPEAKER_01
Jude s, 72%.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then it gets, when you start going down the line, it starts getting sketchy.
4
SPEAKER_00
Most of these are... They re pretty good.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wounded Warrior is a little weird.
4
SPEAKER_00
34% back in the fundraising.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
But, you know, they still, at least 60% of it, or close to 60% of it, goes to the actual programs.
4
SPEAKER_01
What s the worst ones, though, Janet?
4
SPEAKER_00
The worst ones was a different chart.
4
SPEAKER_01
This is a different chart.
4
SPEAKER_01
I want to see the worst ones.
4
SPEAKER_01
Those are good ones.
4
SPEAKER_01
Red Cross has always been thought of as one of the best ones, in terms of the amount of money that actually goes to the cause.
4
SPEAKER_00
These are mostly UK charities, though.
4
SPEAKER_01
Do they have American ones?
4
SPEAKER_01
Or worldwide ones?
4
SPEAKER_01
Let s see that one.
4
SPEAKER_01
That just shows what people are spending on.
4
SPEAKER_01
The worst in terms of the amount of money that goes towards their cause.
4
SPEAKER_01
The top 10 worst charities, it says Kids Wish Network is number one, Disabled Police Officers, 4.4% goes to program expenses, and 94% goes to professional fundraising fees.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s crazy.
4
SPEAKER_01
Disabled Police Officers Counseling Center, 94% of it goes to fundraising fees?
4
SPEAKER_01
That s bonkers.
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I see what s going on look at the cancer survivors fund hey, they survived that s the fucking that s what they get 9% goes to programs 87% goes to fundraising I think a lot of time to make their name something close to like the good one Probably a really good firefighters foundation.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s not right and they call themselves a firefighters charitable foundation and
4
SPEAKER_01
Only 7% goes to the program.
4
SPEAKER_01
85% goes to professional fundraising fees.
4
SPEAKER_01
What does that even mean?
4
SPEAKER_01
Professional fundraising fees.
4
SPEAKER_01
But a lot of them are like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
But you ve got to also think, if you re going to run a charity, you ve got to pay people something.
4
SPEAKER_01
Kids Wish Network, look at this.
4
SPEAKER_01
They raised $127 million.
4
SPEAKER_01
They paid the solicitors $109 million.
4
SPEAKER_01
and they spent percentage on direct cash aid to the actual kids is 2.5%.
4
2.5%.
4
SPEAKER_01
Look at the Cancer Fund of America, less than 1% went to the actual thing, direct cash aid.
4
SPEAKER_01
But when this is direct cash aid and paid to solicitors, who s the solicitors?
4
SPEAKER_01
Who counts as a solicitor there?
4
SPEAKER_01
Does that mean paid to the organization?
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they only pay out that much to the people?
4
SPEAKER_00
Soliciting costs I d be Probably trying to buy overhead.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s overhead.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s everything, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Mm-hmm.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, so it s mostly a scam.
4
SPEAKER_01
Look at the fucking International Union of Police Associations Look at that one.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s zero quick zero point five percent.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s why I quit That s crazy.
4
SPEAKER_02
I work for the cops.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s when I found that three years.
4
SPEAKER_02
I work for the cops Doing donations on the phone after I got arrested.
4
SPEAKER_02
I started in Boulder and
4
SPEAKER_02
And when I went to Seattle, I did it there.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then up in Seattle, I found out what the cops were getting.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m done.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m done.
4
SPEAKER_02
You give me 50 bucks, I m giving you a sticker for the back of your car so when you get pulled over, they know that you donate.
4
SPEAKER_02
And these guys are showing up in Maseratis every day.
4
SPEAKER_02
They re two owners.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, fuck you.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s like the thing in LA with the homeless.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, Coleon Noir sent me a hit to that.
4
SPEAKER_01
He told me they were getting like six-figure salaries.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m like, no way.
4
SPEAKER_01
And some of them are making 240 grand a year.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no, no, no.
4
SPEAKER_01
Taking care of the homeless.
4
SPEAKER_01
That is not being taken care of.
4
SPEAKER_01
They re not doing anything about it.
4
SPEAKER_01
They have to keep the business rolling too, that s the thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
Once you have 20, 30, 50, whatever people making six figures, all that money keeps coming in.
4
SPEAKER_01
You have all those mouths to feed, all those mortgages, all those people.
4
SPEAKER_01
Now you have an industry, now you have bureaucracy, and you re never getting that back.
4
SPEAKER_01
You d have to have some crazy dude that comes in like, who s that guy from Argentina?
4
SPEAKER_01
The guy that just became the president of Argentina with the wacky hair?
4
SPEAKER_01
That guy s amazing.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s like, everybody out!
4
SPEAKER_01
Everybody out!
4
SPEAKER_01
He kicked out everybody.
4
SPEAKER_01
He cut that budget down to nothing.
4
Nothing.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
He got rid of all the bullshit.
4
SPEAKER_02
All the bullshit.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s really crazy when I work for the cops.
4
SPEAKER_02
I would, you know, I loved it.
4
SPEAKER_02
It was great.
4
SPEAKER_02
I had a great time in that office.
4
SPEAKER_02
I d be up there smoking dope.
4
SPEAKER_02
But.
4
SPEAKER_02
With the cops?
4
SPEAKER_02
Nah, it was like one cocktail.
5
SPEAKER_00
He didn t give a fuck.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m over here raising money for you.
5
SPEAKER_00
But even he was on the scam, you know?
5
SPEAKER_00
It s like, come on, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
When you have money that s being donated, like cash that s being donated, it s just, it s gonna get moved around.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s like, you gotta help these fucking people out, you know?
5
SPEAKER_00
And look at now, you go, when I came from Cuba, when I was a little kid, to learn how to do anything, the reason why I learned how to do anything was because of the police athletically.
5
SPEAKER_00
I swear to God.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah?
5
SPEAKER_00
Everything.
5
SPEAKER_00
Shooting, fishing in Central Park, boxing program.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, you shot pool.
5
SPEAKER_00
Who do you think taught me how to shoot pool?
5
SPEAKER_00
Really?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, right on there on 88th and Amsterdam.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s a smart move.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I was always indebted to those people.
5
SPEAKER_00
Always in my heart, because I was a Spanish kid.
5
SPEAKER_00
They took me in over there.
5
SPEAKER_00
They fingerprinted me.
5
SPEAKER_00
They take you to the precinct.
5
SPEAKER_00
You shoot a .22.
5
SPEAKER_00
They give you the target.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
They give you a little thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
They give you, like, a little badge, you know, and you re like, ah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so I always wanted to work for them.
5
SPEAKER_00
Like, that was it.
5
SPEAKER_00
I always, you know, and then after I got in trouble, I m like, you know, I owe them a debt.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were very good to me.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was the guy that fucked up.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I always worked for the cops.
5
SPEAKER_00
I always tried to, you know, get fucking people to donate for stickers or, you know, bulletproof vests and all that shit.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then we would do comedy at the benefits in Seattle, even though I got arrested six times.
5
SPEAKER_00
It never worked.
5
SPEAKER_00
Didn t fucking do anything well, maybe you would have got arrested a lot worse a lot worse Yeah, it s crazy when I found out I was like I m out I m not doing this and now you know you want to help out something happens Hurricane relief, and you re like I m not right.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m not doing it.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m not doing it because it s you know Right and you feel like shit, I d rather see somebody give him a 20
5
SPEAKER_00
Some guy s hungry?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Just go give him a 20.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m not giving leftover food or whatever.
5
SPEAKER_00
Just give the guy a 20.
5
SPEAKER_00
Make his own decisions.
5
SPEAKER_00
If he wants to snort it or buy fentanyl, go.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t give a fuck.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, it s not my problem, but I did my job.
5
SPEAKER_01
The Red Cross seems like a good one.
5
SPEAKER_01
But also, wasn t the Red Cross one of the people that was helping people map out the way to illegally enter the U.S.?
5
SPEAKER_01
Wasn t that one of the things that the Red Cross was doing?
5
SPEAKER_01
Google that.
5
SPEAKER_01
But that could be also that the Red Cross is a legitimate charitable organization and it realizes that these people are going to do this no matter what and show them the way to do it that s safe.
5
SPEAKER_01
If they re going to do it, they re going to do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, showing them the way that s safe to me seems like, you know, like almost an ethical thing to do if you know that this is happening.
5
SPEAKER_01
and then providing them aid along the way so they don t die.
5
SPEAKER_01
That seems like, you know, the whole immigration thing is very complicated.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, you came from immigrants, I came from immigrants, or my grandparents were immigrants, but it s just the way they re doing it, where anybody can get through, is so wild.
5
SPEAKER_01
So the Red Cross has provided maps to migrants traveling towards the U.S.
5
SPEAKER_01
border.
5
SPEAKER_01
Now what is their reasoning?
5
SPEAKER_01
is the Red Cross giving maps to migrants.
5
SPEAKER_01
The map in the social media is real.
5
SPEAKER_01
Different versions have existed since at least 2018, and some have been distributed by the International Committee of the Red Cross.
5
SPEAKER_01
The ICRC is a consortium of Red Cross agencies, including the American Red Cross.
5
SPEAKER_01
The map is a part of an informational safety pamphlet provided by aid organizations, including the National Red Cross Societies to migrants traveling to Central America.
5
SPEAKER_01
The pamphlet also includes resource information like where to find food, shelter, and medical assistance.
5
SPEAKER_01
While the map has been around since at least 2018, American Red Cross partnered with the Mexican Red Cross and others during the COVID-19 pandemic to promote these safety materials.
5
SPEAKER_01
The Red Cross logos appeared across the top of the map.
5
SPEAKER_01
The American Red Cross logo was removed in 2022 after the COVID-19 partnership expired.
5
SPEAKER_01
The current pamphlet containing the map shows the current partners are the National Red Cross Societies of Mexico, Guatemala, Honduras, and El Salvador.
5
SPEAKER_01
does not seek to encourage or discourage migration, but rather to contribute to mitigating the vulnerability factors of this population during the migratory route.
5
SPEAKER_00
I can live with that, Joe.
5
SPEAKER_00
I can live with that, too.
5
SPEAKER_00
I can live with that.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s not encouraging people to do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s saying they re doing it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Let s make it so at least they have a safe way to do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Listen, man.
5
SPEAKER_00
This migrant situation has turned everything around.
5
SPEAKER_00
New York City, Chicago, LA, they re everywhere, you know.
5
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, tax money, and New York s giving you $10,000 now, an ATM card, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
They give you $10,000 if you re a migrant.
5
SPEAKER_00
Something along those lines, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, and I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
There s a lot to say.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, look at our fucking vets, how they get treated.
5
SPEAKER_00
Look, you know, so.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m going to send you this, Jamie.
5
SPEAKER_01
See what s going on in Paris.
5
SPEAKER_01
They started, they were trying to kick these dudes out of the country.
5
SPEAKER_01
They started a riot at the airport.
5
SPEAKER_00
Who were they trying to kick out?
5
SPEAKER_01
Illegal immigrants.
5
SPEAKER_01
I ll show you.
5
SPEAKER_01
Jamie, I just sent it to you.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and they re like, no, we re not going.
5
SPEAKER_01
They re like, you have to go.
5
SPEAKER_01
There s too many of you.
5
SPEAKER_01
Like, no, fuck you.
5
SPEAKER_01
We re not flying.
5
SPEAKER_01
And they start a ride at the airport.
5
SPEAKER_01
They were trying to deport him.
5
SPEAKER_00
And they re like, uh-uh.
5
SPEAKER_00
We re here.
5
SPEAKER_00
Listen, all I remember is one thing, Joe.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I use this, and I m not saying nothing bad about anybody.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was in this.
5
SPEAKER_00
Give me the volume.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is a full-on Donnybrook at the airport.
5
SPEAKER_01
They re beating up attendants.
5
SPEAKER_01
Security guys are getting fucked up.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is wild shit, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
So they got them over there too?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they have a lot.
5
SPEAKER_01
A lot.
5
SPEAKER_01
A lot of migrants in Europe.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s basically, it happened right after the pandemic in mass.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s just massive amounts of migrants in Europe, massive amounts of migrants here.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s almost like it s on purpose.
5
SPEAKER_01
If it s not on purpose, what a coincidence.
5
SPEAKER_00
But it just seemed like there just wasn t migrants coming in.
5
SPEAKER_00
But what I was telling you before was, I think I told you last time.
5
SPEAKER_00
I saw what the Mariel boatlift did to my area.
5
SPEAKER_00
Hudson County, not in 1979, but I saw it five years later.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then I saw what they were doing in San Francisco.
5
SPEAKER_00
When I got to San Francisco in 95, there was a huge Cuban population.
5
SPEAKER_00
San Francisco.
5
SPEAKER_00
So this is the people that took off- For Mariel in 78, 79.
5
SPEAKER_00
Is this when Fidel kicked them out?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_00
He kicked out 160,000 people.
5
SPEAKER_00
We didn t have records on these people.
5
SPEAKER_00
So we didn t really know what they were about.
5
SPEAKER_00
They could just tell you, I worked in construction.
5
SPEAKER_00
And they didn t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
So this is that, but 10 times.
5
SPEAKER_00
That was 100,000 people, 200,000.
5
SPEAKER_00
This is 8 million or something like that.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s come through?
5
SPEAKER_00
At least.
5
SPEAKER_00
You re not going to feel this today.
5
SPEAKER_00
You re going to feel this five years from now.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, they could feel it real soon, depending upon who the people are and why they re here.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, the most troubling version is sleeper cells.
5
SPEAKER_01
The most troubling version is that there s military cells that exist here, terrorist cells.
5
SPEAKER_00
The Chinese were coming in.
5
SPEAKER_00
Now they re growing wheat.
5
SPEAKER_00
Are they?
5
SPEAKER_00
Chinese?
5
SPEAKER_00
Jamie, go to the videotape.
5
SPEAKER_00
Chinese are buying farms.
5
SPEAKER_00
You just had somebody on here that was talking about the Chinese are buying farms here.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes, they re definitely buying farms.
5
SPEAKER_00
What do you think they re doing with those fucking farms?
5
SPEAKER_00
Grazing fucking sushi?
5
SPEAKER_00
No.
5
SPEAKER_00
They re fucking growing reefer.
5
SPEAKER_01
Department of Homeland Security memo first reported by the Daily Caller received as a part of the Freedom of Information Act request said that more than 270 unlicensed cannabis cultivation sites in Maine were operated by Chinese nationals.
5
SPEAKER_00
Who the fuck do you think you re dealing with, Joe Bananas?
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
275 grow-ups in Maine.
5
SPEAKER_00
And the weed is on fire up there in New Hampshire.
5
SPEAKER_00
Is it?
5
SPEAKER_00
They say that s the best weed right now, New Hampshire.
5
SPEAKER_00
Really?
5
SPEAKER_00
New Hampshire?
5
SPEAKER_00
Somewhere up there.
5
SPEAKER_00
New Hampshire, Maine.
5
SPEAKER_00
They say the weed is so fucking strong.
5
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
5
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
5
SPEAKER_00
See that?
5
SPEAKER_00
Look at that.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re growing fucking reaper.
5
SPEAKER_01
So what is the legalization of weed in Maine?
5
SPEAKER_01
Is it legal there?
5
SPEAKER_01
Not sure, brother.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s legal in so many states now.
5
SPEAKER_01
Maine, New Hampshire, I think.
5
SPEAKER_01
How much cannabis can I possess?
5
SPEAKER_01
Adults 21 years of age or older can possess up to 2.5 ounces of a combination of cannabis, cannabis concentrate, and cannabis products, including no more than five grams of cannabis concentrate.
5
SPEAKER_01
How many plants can I grow?
5
SPEAKER_01
Mainers can grow cannabis for personal use.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s reasonable.
5
SPEAKER_01
Is that your phone?
5
SPEAKER_00
No.
5
SPEAKER_01
Something s ringing.
6
SPEAKER_01
That s you, bro.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s ringing like a phone phone.
6
SPEAKER_01
You get the old school ring on there.
6
SPEAKER_01
You pick that?
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, and Jersey s buck wild, right?
6
SPEAKER_03
What do you mean?
6
SPEAKER_03
With weed.
6
SPEAKER_03
I just started going to weed stores in January.
6
SPEAKER_03
I said, you know what?
6
SPEAKER_03
I m done with laughing gas.
6
SPEAKER_03
I got to expand my horizon and see what s out there.
6
SPEAKER_03
And the first one I went to was in Neptune.
6
SPEAKER_03
And they re pretty impressive.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s a big fucking joint.
6
SPEAKER_03
I forget the name, but it was pretty impressive.
6
SPEAKER_03
Second place I went to is 15 minutes from my house, Joe, right by the doctor s office in Freehold.
6
SPEAKER_03
Holy shit.
6
SPEAKER_03
And that s when I discovered rhythm.
6
SPEAKER_03
Because I was like, listen, I m here to see the devil.
6
SPEAKER_03
I don t wanna know that Jersey fuckin  swank.
6
SPEAKER_03
And everything s in containers, it s completely different.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I got this rhythm, 36%.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I m like, this is me, dog.
6
SPEAKER_02
It says, we are in prison.
6
SPEAKER_02
Please come and save us.
6
SPEAKER_02
We are here.
6
SPEAKER_02
It gives the address.
6
SPEAKER_02
No cell phones.
6
SPEAKER_02
We were abducted from China.
6
SPEAKER_02
Passports were confiscated.
6
SPEAKER_02
The boss is a woman, 5 2 , about 45 years old, no means of transportation.
6
SPEAKER_02
The manager is Asian, black hair, 5 6 .
6
SPEAKER_02
A lot of marijuana is grown on the first floor.
6
SPEAKER_02
A lot of finished products.
6
SPEAKER_02
No escape from the house.
6
SPEAKER_02
Only work but no salary.
6
SPEAKER_02
I want to leave here.
6
SPEAKER_02
We tried to escape but failed.
6
SPEAKER_02
We were beaten.
6
SPEAKER_02
Please come and save us.
6
SPEAKER_02
Whoa.
6
SPEAKER_02
So they got slaves working making the weed in Maine.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Shanghai d.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
That shit s strong.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s the shit that the Boeing mechanics are smoking.
6
SPEAKER_02
Isn t that crazy that there s fucking crazy slaves in America right now growing weed for China.
6
SPEAKER_03
Let s see where this is gonna go.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s fucking interesting.
6
SPEAKER_03
That s crazy.
6
SPEAKER_03
I saw this a couple weeks ago.
6
SPEAKER_03
I read the article.
6
SPEAKER_03
I m like, oh, and then that guy said it on your podcast.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, he said about farmland.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Farmland.
6
SPEAKER_02
I didn t know it was happening like that.
6
SPEAKER_03
The fuck you think they re doing?
6
SPEAKER_03
Growing fucking bean sprouts or soy sprouts?
6
SPEAKER_03
They re going for it, Jack.
6
SPEAKER_03
Well, they re controlling farmland.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s around military bases.
6
SPEAKER_03
That s what s scary.
6
SPEAKER_03
And a lot of Chinese were coming through the border.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, military age.
6
SPEAKER_03
A lot of Chinese.
6
SPEAKER_03
So let s see where this hand is getting played.
6
SPEAKER_02
Not only a lot of Chinese, but they have Chinese stops where you can go and everybody speaks Chinese along the way.
6
SPEAKER_02
And they have a Chinese restaurant.
6
SPEAKER_02
Everything s written in Chinese, Chinese signs everywhere.
6
SPEAKER_02
So they have like a very specific organized route to get to America.
6
SPEAKER_02
And these guys all young, fit guys coming to America.
6
SPEAKER_02
Like, what are you doing?
6
SPEAKER_02
Like, what the fuck is going on here?
6
SPEAKER_02
We re just basically sitting ducks.
6
SPEAKER_02
We re waiting.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, we re sitting ducks.
6
SPEAKER_02
And there was a big warning today.
6
SPEAKER_02
Homeland Security s warning about terrorist attacks in America.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s what scares me about this fucking election, too.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m not saying that they would do this, but I definitely think they have in the past allowed things to happen just so they can tighten up on restrictions and laws and scare people more and get people to vote one way or another.
6
SPEAKER_02
Scary shit.
6
SPEAKER_02
We re looking at weird times, my friend.
6
SPEAKER_02
The weirdest, right?
6
SPEAKER_02
The fucking weirdest.
6
SPEAKER_02
And ever in your life, could you ever imagine things being so bizarre as they are right now?
6
SPEAKER_03
They ve been bizarre for about five years now, where you just can t believe the shit you re hearing, and you just say, you know what, I m gonna stick to my camp.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m good here.
6
SPEAKER_02
It was bizarre in 2017, but it wasn t bizarre like now.
6
SPEAKER_02
No, this is different.
6
SPEAKER_02
This is insane.
6
SPEAKER_03
Did he get arrested?
6
SPEAKER_03
I mean, just everything.
6
SPEAKER_03
Every bridge getting hit.
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, something every fucking week.
6
SPEAKER_03
Every day.
6
SPEAKER_03
You know, Trump 480 million.
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, you know, they need it by Monday.
6
SPEAKER_03
I thought Mark Cuban would bail him out.
6
SPEAKER_02
I didn t know who the fuck was gonna bail him out.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, how does that work?
6
SPEAKER_02
I think they knocked it down to $175 billion.
6
SPEAKER_02
They asked him, how s he gonna pay it?
6
SPEAKER_02
He goes, cash.
6
SPEAKER_00
And now he s worth six point something billion because of the social deal.
6
SPEAKER_00
Right.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s all stock, I guess.
6
SPEAKER_02
Right.
6
SPEAKER_02
The whole thing, I m not a financial guy, obviously, but I think the whole thing is liquidity.
6
SPEAKER_02
How much money do you actually have coming in?
6
SPEAKER_02
How much is it tied up in real estate investments and holdings?
6
SPEAKER_02
And Trump s got buildings and hotels and resorts.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s a lot, a lot going on.
6
SPEAKER_02
How the fuck can he pay attention to all that shit?
6
SPEAKER_02
Can you imagine running some kind of a business empire, trying to pay attention to everything?
6
SPEAKER_03
Dog, I met him when he was fucking at a football team.
6
SPEAKER_02
Really?
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, he owned the fucking Generals.
6
SPEAKER_03
That s how I knew Herschel Walker and those people.
6
SPEAKER_03
That s how I met those dudes.
6
SPEAKER_03
When was this?
6
SPEAKER_03
Fuckin  85.
6
SPEAKER_03
You met Trump in 85?
6
SPEAKER_03
A long time ago.
6
SPEAKER_03
What was he like in 85?
6
SPEAKER_03
Hello, goodbye.
6
SPEAKER_03
I don t fuckin  know.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s not like we hung out.
6
SPEAKER_03
I was scared of him.
6
SPEAKER_03
Why?
6
SPEAKER_03
Because it was like, I told you, when I got out of jail, I was supposed to have a job selling siding and doors and saddles and electrical equipment, an indoor salesman in Jersey.
6
SPEAKER_03
And when I got out of prison, I go, I m out.
6
SPEAKER_03
Can I come take the job now?
6
SPEAKER_03
And he goes, I can t.
6
SPEAKER_03
We re going out of business.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I go, what happened?
6
SPEAKER_03
He goes, Trump built something.
6
SPEAKER_03
He was going to these little hardware stores like ours, told us to go fuck ourselves.
6
SPEAKER_03
We re done.
6
SPEAKER_03
I knew this in 88.
6
SPEAKER_03
What do you mean?
6
SPEAKER_03
At that time, supposedly, he would build something.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s like you coming to somebody, a little restaurant, and going, I want to build my own fucking steak.
6
SPEAKER_03
And he would go to people and say, I m going to build this, and then use your lumber, or whatever the fuck.
6
SPEAKER_03
And since there s so much with contractors, there s subcontractors and subcontractors, they would stiff their bills.
6
SPEAKER_03
They weren t paying their bills.
6
SPEAKER_03
Really?
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, this is one out of the lot.
6
SPEAKER_03
You can look it up.
6
SPEAKER_03
This isn t something, you know, and that s all I remember from Trump.
6
SPEAKER_03
I met him in 85, and I fucking, that was my only thing with Trump.
6
SPEAKER_03
You know, if you re from New York, you know who he is.
6
SPEAKER_03
You ve been hearing the name growing up.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I remember hearing about this from you, actually, now.
6
SPEAKER_02
You were telling me that there was, with contractors.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Stiff, small contractors.
6
SPEAKER_03
Small contractors, and then we d go downhill.
6
SPEAKER_03
You know, run downhill.
6
SPEAKER_03
So now I gave you all the doors I had for your project.
6
SPEAKER_03
Trump just wasn t building one house with one window.
6
SPEAKER_03
I m giving you everything on the arm.
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, you gave me a deposit.
6
SPEAKER_03
Maybe sometimes not.
6
SPEAKER_03
Maybe I m so excited to do business with Trump, I got such a small place that I forget everything.
6
SPEAKER_03
You know, whatever the fuck happens.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_03
So that s what happened in 88.
6
SPEAKER_03
I mean, I don t know the whole story, but he mentioned Trump.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s all I remember from that fucking guy.
6
SPEAKER_02
I would also imagine if you re doing some big projects like that, it s probably a lot of people involved.
6
SPEAKER_02
A lot of people.
6
SPEAKER_02
Making decisions.
6
SPEAKER_02
A building?
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
A building?
6
SPEAKER_03
He s the GC.
6
SPEAKER_03
He takes bids for everything else, right?
6
SPEAKER_03
That s how it usually works.
6
SPEAKER_03
Is that what Trump does?
6
SPEAKER_03
As a real estate developer?
6
SPEAKER_03
I don t know how it goes down, but there s a GC, a general contractor, and then
6
SPEAKER_03
There s windows, wiring, all the different departments.
6
SPEAKER_03
You don t know what everybody s doing.
6
SPEAKER_03
You got 20 people in your fucking building.
6
SPEAKER_03
When you built the comedy club, how many people were fucking there every day?
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, a lot.
6
SPEAKER_03
You don t know.
6
SPEAKER_03
You don t know.
6
SPEAKER_03
You re not a contractor, so you don t know if they re doing the wall right.
6
SPEAKER_03
You just trust whatever.
6
SPEAKER_03
This is all I remember.
6
SPEAKER_03
That was it.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, the whole construction business was always shady.
6
SPEAKER_02
And it was always tied up with the mob.
6
SPEAKER_02
Like, I knew a couple guys who had no-show-up jobs, like at the Javits Center.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
You just get paid.
6
SPEAKER_02
Concrete.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
They own concrete.
6
SPEAKER_02
That was a thing the mob would make deals.
6
SPEAKER_02
Whenever any sort of job was getting done, they d have a certain amount of no-show jobs for their guys.
6
SPEAKER_02
Always.
6
SPEAKER_03
Always that s funny you get insurance mm-hmm, and that s when you arrest those guys you go.
6
SPEAKER_03
What do you do for a living?
6
SPEAKER_03
I m the carpenter s you yeah carpenter s you you don t even know what an inch is You not a measure six inches you fuck yeah
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it was a scam.
6
SPEAKER_02
But it was how they avoided taxes too, right?
6
SPEAKER_02
Because taxes was what brought a lot of them down.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s what brought Al Capone down, tax evasion.
6
SPEAKER_02
Tax evasion.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_03
But the other guys were pretty smart.
6
SPEAKER_03
They had that millionaire club, the bid club.
6
SPEAKER_03
They would only do $2 million bids or something.
6
SPEAKER_03
They would take $2 million right off the top, the mob, on every job.
6
SPEAKER_03
Are you fucking kidding me?
6
SPEAKER_03
Just, are you kidding me?
6
SPEAKER_03
Every job in New York, you know, it s well known that when the little guy from Arizona who was over there with Gotti, he controlled construction.
6
SPEAKER_03
Like, that was his fucking thing, you know?
6
SPEAKER_03
You couldn t get anything built without that fucking dude.
7
SPEAKER_00
Can you imagine if you live in New York City at that time, and you re trying to build buildings, and you gotta do deals with the mob, and you gotta do deals with Sammy the Bull?
7
SPEAKER_01
Well, here s the deal.
7
SPEAKER_01
Like, I remember in 1890, I was roofing.
7
SPEAKER_01
And the company was from Jersey, my brother-in-law.
7
SPEAKER_01
And I asked him, you know, why d you pick up this job?
7
SPEAKER_01
And he was telling me, it s just so difficult.
7
SPEAKER_01
And I go, what do you mean?
7
SPEAKER_01
He goes, take the dumpster.
7
SPEAKER_01
That dumpster that they pick up every day and take off and they bring another one?
7
SPEAKER_01
In Colorado at the time was $200.
7
SPEAKER_01
That same dumpster in New York was $2,000 a day.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s how inflated the prices were.
7
SPEAKER_01
$1,800 different.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s fucking crazy.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s with the cost of doing fucking construction, you know, in New York.
7
SPEAKER_00
But it was always a corrupt town.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s why it took the UFC forever to get into New York.
7
SPEAKER_01
Look at these people waiting for licenses.
7
SPEAKER_01
I know people in Jersey waiting for a license since I landed.
7
SPEAKER_01
I got a license.
7
SPEAKER_01
You gotta grease 80 fucking people.
7
SPEAKER_01
80 people, you gotta know people, pay.
7
SPEAKER_01
I know companies that are still waiting for a license from LA.
7
SPEAKER_01
They just thought they were gonna come and apply in New Jersey.
7
SPEAKER_01
or in New York City.
7
SPEAKER_01
Look at New York City.
7
SPEAKER_01
They had a thing, they were giving licenses only to people who had felonies.
7
SPEAKER_01
Did you remember that?
7
SPEAKER_01
In New York, they wanted the ideal medical marijuana owners, that ex-convict who went to prison or got in trouble for marijuana.
7
SPEAKER_01
This is a second chance.
7
SPEAKER_01
Check it out.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s fucking insane.
7
SPEAKER_01
Can t get a license in New Jersey.
7
SPEAKER_00
That is kind of crazy, but
7
SPEAKER_00
They should do something for those poor fucks that went to jail for weed.
7
SPEAKER_00
Nobody should ever went to jail for weed.
7
SPEAKER_00
No.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s ridiculous.
7
SPEAKER_01
No.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s a ridiculous thing to put people in jail for.
7
SPEAKER_00
You put people in a cage for that, especially while everything else is okay.
7
SPEAKER_00
Doesn t make any sense.
7
SPEAKER_01
Look what you re finding out now.
7
SPEAKER_01
Look at this guy today.
7
SPEAKER_01
I got in the Uber fresh out of smoking a fucking joint of this shit this morning.
7
SPEAKER_01
Thank God the guy was Cuban.
7
SPEAKER_01
When they send you the Uber name, the guy s name was Antonio.
7
SPEAKER_01
I go, he s Cuban.
7
SPEAKER_01
Got in the car, I was in the car two minutes.
7
SPEAKER_01
He goes, what is that shit?
7
SPEAKER_01
And I just gave him the canister.
7
SPEAKER_01
I go, smell this.
7
SPEAKER_01
He s like, wow.
7
SPEAKER_01
And this is a guy that s been in this country for 10 years.
7
SPEAKER_01
And he said to me, you know, I don t know what the fuss is about this.
7
SPEAKER_01
This is a magical herb.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
People don t realize when you smoke this, pains go away, you start thinking clearer.
7
SPEAKER_01
He goes, it takes time.
7
SPEAKER_01
There s a fucking Uber driver telling me this shit.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
And I asked him, how do you know about this stuff?
7
SPEAKER_01
He goes, in Cuba, we were growing weed.
7
SPEAKER_01
Really?
7
SPEAKER_01
It was outdoor weed.
7
SPEAKER_01
It wasn t that strong, and sometimes they d bring it from Jamaica.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s what he was saying.
7
SPEAKER_01
We were getting Cuba weed from Jamaica.
7
SPEAKER_01
I mean, the soil is done in Cuba.
7
SPEAKER_01
Really?
7
SPEAKER_01
Well, they re complaining about cigars.
7
SPEAKER_01
These cigars aren t tasting the same.
7
SPEAKER_01
They said that the fucking soil has just been abused.
7
SPEAKER_01
There s no nourishment.
7
SPEAKER_01
Right.
7
SPEAKER_01
This guy was telling me today it costs more for a pack of chicken in Cuba than what it does in the United States.
7
SPEAKER_01
A gallon of gas costs more in Cuba than what it does right here now, here in Austin.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, it makes sense.
7
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it makes sense.
7
SPEAKER_00
You have to have infrastructure.
7
SPEAKER_00
You have to have capitalism.
7
SPEAKER_00
You have to have people competing.
7
SPEAKER_00
That whole communism thing doesn t work.
7
SPEAKER_00
And the thing is, like, the thing that the people that love communism point to, they re like, yeah, but we put an embargo on Cuba.
7
SPEAKER_00
Like, what if we didn t do that?
7
SPEAKER_00
Like, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s still a dictatorship.
7
SPEAKER_00
It still is.
7
SPEAKER_00
You get told what you re doing with your life.
7
SPEAKER_00
You don t want that.
7
SPEAKER_00
Nobody wants that.
7
SPEAKER_00
You might think that that is better because there s no rich people.
7
SPEAKER_00
If that s what you re thinking, you re missing everything because that means everybody s poor.
7
SPEAKER_00
You don t want everybody to be poor.
7
SPEAKER_00
You want everybody to have a chance to be well off.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s what you have here.
7
SPEAKER_00
Now, some people, they get a bad roll of the dice, they get a bad hand of cards, they get a bad situation in life, they get a bad place that they live, and they re fucked.
7
SPEAKER_00
This is true.
7
SPEAKER_00
And it s not fair.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s not fair in terms of equal opportunity.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s not.
7
SPEAKER_00
But in terms of opportunity, there s no place better than right here, and there s no place better with actual capitalism.
7
SPEAKER_00
You can do great things.
7
SPEAKER_00
You can do great things not just for you, but for other people.
7
SPEAKER_00
You can do great things if people give you the freedom to do great things.
7
SPEAKER_00
But if you live in a socialist country, you don t have any of that.
7
SPEAKER_00
You don t get to decide what you do.
7
SPEAKER_00
The state gets to decide.
7
SPEAKER_00
And how do they enforce that?
7
SPEAKER_00
There s only one way.
7
SPEAKER_00
Force.
7
SPEAKER_00
Military.
7
SPEAKER_00
There s only one way to get people to follow the rules of communism and socialism.
7
SPEAKER_00
And it s always a dictatorship.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s always one group has all the money and all the power, and they tell you what the fuck you re going to do.
7
SPEAKER_00
And if you don t do it, they kill you or they lock you up in jail.
7
SPEAKER_00
And they threaten people, and they scare people, and they make people disappear, so everybody stays in line.
7
SPEAKER_00
And that is what people always do whenever you get a communist country.
7
SPEAKER_00
If you ask any of these wacky kids in colleges, give me an example of socialism that works.
7
SPEAKER_00
They ll give you like socialist programs or countries like some Norwegian countries that have a lot of socialist programs that are really good countries.
7
SPEAKER_00
They have really good health care, really good education.
7
SPEAKER_00
You pay a lot in taxes, but it goes a long way.
7
SPEAKER_00
And they have a better society because of it.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s great.
7
SPEAKER_00
But they still have the freedom to do whatever the fuck they want to do.
7
SPEAKER_00
They still have the freedom to do whatever kind of occupations they want.
7
SPEAKER_00
You have the ability to make a shitload of money.
7
SPEAKER_00
You have the ability to excel.
7
SPEAKER_00
The problem is people want a quality of outcome when they don t have anything.
7
SPEAKER_00
But you re never going to have that because, first of all, it s impossible.
7
SPEAKER_00
But second of all, because you re never going to have a quality of effort.
7
SPEAKER_00
And one of the things that a competitive environment or a place like America where you have freedom is, some people put more into life.
7
SPEAKER_00
They put more into the things they do.
7
SPEAKER_00
And they get more back.
7
SPEAKER_00
They get more out of it.
7
SPEAKER_00
And they re inspiring to other people to do the same.
7
SPEAKER_00
And you see them live a rich and fulfilled life, and you re inspired to do the same.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s not happening to Cuba, bro.
7
SPEAKER_00
That is not happening.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s not happening in any of these communist countries.
7
SPEAKER_00
Go to North Korea.
7
SPEAKER_00
Ask me how it worked out when they made a deal to take over all the farms so that no one would ever go hungry.
7
SPEAKER_00
Let the state control everything.
7
SPEAKER_00
What a great idea.
7
SPEAKER_00
Everybody give up your farm to the state.
7
SPEAKER_00
Now you re fucked.
7
SPEAKER_00
Now you re fucked.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s the beauty, you know, as somebody who knew that other side, not from living it, but just from hearing the stories.
7
SPEAKER_01
It makes you appreciate this so much more.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
That, listen, you could fall into place in this country or you don t need a ceiling over your income.
7
SPEAKER_01
This is the greatest thing about this country.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s like when I first got out there, I always worked on commission, Joe.
7
SPEAKER_01
I don t want your hourly wage.
7
SPEAKER_01
Shove that up your fucking ass.
7
SPEAKER_01
I m going to come here and prove myself.
7
SPEAKER_01
You want me to sell cars?
7
SPEAKER_01
I ll sell cars.
7
SPEAKER_01
Want me to sell doors or signs?
7
SPEAKER_01
I ll sell them, but I m doing it on commission.
7
SPEAKER_01
I want the most that I could get for that fucking thing.
7
SPEAKER_01
Right.
7
SPEAKER_01
Most people don t.
7
SPEAKER_01
I did that at 19.
7
SPEAKER_01
I knew.
7
SPEAKER_01
For me, it was going to be commission work.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and it s a dangerous choice.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s a dangerous choice, but it s based on you.
7
SPEAKER_01
Right.
7
SPEAKER_01
With the effort you put into it.
7
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
7
SPEAKER_01
If you want to sell.
7
SPEAKER_01
When I worked at Foot Locker,
7
SPEAKER_01
I was the number one fucking sneaker dude at Foot Locker.
7
SPEAKER_01
And it took me a while, but I fucking went.
7
SPEAKER_01
And then when I started selling cars, again, I went for it.
7
SPEAKER_01
Because I loved it.
7
SPEAKER_01
I learned about salesmanship.
7
SPEAKER_01
I learned about human nature.
7
SPEAKER_01
I learned that you have to mail letters to people.
7
SPEAKER_01
Those are the guys.
7
SPEAKER_01
I know they re not going to buy a car, but if you send 100 letters, three people have to buy a fucking car.
7
SPEAKER_01
So you re working on all numbers.
7
SPEAKER_01
The United States is a beautiful fucking place.
7
SPEAKER_01
Because a guy like me could write a book.
7
SPEAKER_01
Think about that.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know, a guy like me could, you know, went to prison.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know, I didn t get Social Security when my mother died, because she worked under a fucking alias.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know, everything got beat up on me.
7
SPEAKER_01
But let me tell you what s about to happen.
7
SPEAKER_01
I m going to retire when I m 65, collect Social Security, and my daughter gets Social Security now for three years.
7
SPEAKER_01
Which is like $1,800 a month for college or whatever the fuck, you know.
7
SPEAKER_01
I don t give a fuck.
7
SPEAKER_01
So it all came out in the wash 40 years fucking later.
7
SPEAKER_01
I didn t have the Social Security for me because my mom used the alias.
7
SPEAKER_01
But my point is, dog, you can do whatever you fucking want.
7
SPEAKER_01
You saw it, yo.
7
SPEAKER_01
We were talking about it today.
7
SPEAKER_01
Kids were coming down here with cars, living in their cars.
7
SPEAKER_01
And look what they re doing now.
7
SPEAKER_01
Because they believed in themselves, you gave them a fucking door, and they fucking took it.
7
SPEAKER_01
Most people are still now like, my agent said nothing s gonna happen at all.
7
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s the same thing.
7
SPEAKER_01
Some people take chances.
7
SPEAKER_01
Some people sit there waiting for the blue bird of happiness.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s the other option you have in this country.
7
SPEAKER_01
You can actually sit and wait for the blue birds of happiness.
7
SPEAKER_01
When I came out of prison, all I had to do was sign a piece of paper and I m disabled for life.
7
SPEAKER_01
I got a $1,300 check every month.
7
SPEAKER_01
And some people would take that and go look
8
SPEAKER_00
I m living like a doctor.
8
SPEAKER_00
Think about that.
8
SPEAKER_00
Some people would go $1,300 a month.
8
SPEAKER_00
Fuck, that s me.
8
SPEAKER_00
Food stamps, that s me.
8
SPEAKER_00
I can still take my bills.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking insane.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s the choices that you make, Joe.
8
SPEAKER_02
And it can imprison you.
8
SPEAKER_02
That kind of money, even a small amount of money, can imprison you.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s what scares me about universal basic income.
8
SPEAKER_02
You know, people say if they gave everybody X amount of money, people could just pursue their dreams and they wouldn t have to worry about food.
8
SPEAKER_02
No, they probably won t.
8
SPEAKER_02
No.
8
SPEAKER_00
You can t give anything to anybody.
8
SPEAKER_00
We re humans.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
We take it for granted.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
We get 10 checks in the mail for a thousand a month.
8
SPEAKER_00
They cut us off.
8
SPEAKER_00
We don t know what the fuck happened.
8
SPEAKER_00
Right.
8
SPEAKER_00
I d rather not get anything.
8
SPEAKER_00
Where are all these people?
8
SPEAKER_00
After COVID, everybody fucking got checks in the mail.
8
SPEAKER_00
Now you can t get people to work no more.
8
SPEAKER_00
Can t get people to work.
8
SPEAKER_00
You go to a place that s a great restaurant or something, and the first three people you face don t even know where the fuck they re at.
8
SPEAKER_00
But they had to hire them.
8
SPEAKER_00
You gave people money, now they re not gonna come back.
8
SPEAKER_00
They re gonna build ways not to come back.
8
SPEAKER_00
People are living it up.
8
SPEAKER_00
during COVID, Doug.
8
SPEAKER_00
Living it up!
8
SPEAKER_00
Unemployment, this, that.
8
SPEAKER_00
We still had to go out there and crack fucking stupid jokes outside, getting attacked by fucking spiders and shit, thinking there s a leopard in the fucking thing.
8
SPEAKER_00
Seriously.
8
SPEAKER_00
The first time I went outside with Rich Ross, I didn t know what the fuck that was.
8
SPEAKER_00
A bat almost hit me on stage.
8
SPEAKER_00
And I told him, and he goes, oh, you missed the other night.
8
SPEAKER_00
There was a fucking bear.
8
SPEAKER_00
And they ll be like, what the fuck are you talking about?
8
SPEAKER_00
There s a bear in the woods?
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what he was talking about.
8
SPEAKER_00
Some bear, a boar.
8
SPEAKER_00
Well, there s a lot of them out there in New Jersey, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you were telling me last time.
8
SPEAKER_00
But, you know, America s fucking beautiful, man.
8
SPEAKER_00
Where else can a felon with two strikes... I got two strikes.
8
SPEAKER_00
My next strike is life, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
They give you like 20 years if you have three strikes.
8
SPEAKER_00
When have you met a guy that s down on two strikes
8
SPEAKER_00
That did anything.
8
SPEAKER_00
You just give up.
8
SPEAKER_00
They re gonna get me.
8
SPEAKER_00
I refused.
8
SPEAKER_00
I told them suck my dick.
8
SPEAKER_00
Even when the feds were looking for me in 99 for that gun.
8
SPEAKER_00
I wasn t copping.
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what you re talking about.
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know, man.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m not doing it.
8
SPEAKER_00
This is the path I m taking.
8
SPEAKER_00
And I never got in trouble again, Joe.
8
SPEAKER_00
Never.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, comedy became
8
SPEAKER_00
You need something to get you out of there.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, I just didn t stop doing coke.
8
SPEAKER_00
Nobody just stops doing coke, Joe.
8
SPEAKER_00
They go to eight rehabs.
8
SPEAKER_00
But I saw something on the other side.
8
SPEAKER_00
I saw what my friends were doing.
8
SPEAKER_00
I saw what people were doing.
8
SPEAKER_00
And once you hear about Roseanne getting the Tonight Show, were you there?
8
SPEAKER_00
No.
8
SPEAKER_00
Were you there when fucking Rodney blew up the garden?
8
SPEAKER_00
No.
8
SPEAKER_00
To see it is something completely different.
8
SPEAKER_00
When you re at the store with guys working the door, how much were we getting?
8
SPEAKER_00
$25 a shift.
8
SPEAKER_00
She was paying me $25 on Sunday nights to work the door and $25 to MC.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s no money, but you fall in love with what you re doing Yeah, and you know there s a path and there s a path and when you start seeing other people rise Yeah, and you re stuck as a fucking addict.
8
SPEAKER_00
You re fucking stuck You don t know when to stop I was stuck as an addict and I got to being stuck as a fat, dude
8
SPEAKER_00
Because there was a point, if my elevator broke, I wouldn t leave the fucking house.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m not walking those three flights of stairs.
8
SPEAKER_00
I was 450 pounds.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m not doing it.
8
SPEAKER_00
Were you really that big at one point?
8
418, 420.
8
SPEAKER_00
My wife was tying my shoelaces.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know how embarrassing that fucking is?
8
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know how fucking embarrassing that is, looking back at it now?
8
SPEAKER_00
People coming to visit you in jail.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s bullshit life, man.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
There s so much out there, Joe.
8
SPEAKER_00
There s so fucking ...
8
SPEAKER_00
And now, that s what I m trying to sell to my daughter.
8
SPEAKER_00
There s so much out there.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, people in New Jersey, all they know is Florida.
8
SPEAKER_00
I ve never seen fucking people that love Florida so much.
8
SPEAKER_00
I can t stand fucking Florida, because they like it so much.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, vacation for people in Jersey, one week in Atlantic City, they bust out the white shoes, then there s one week in Florida.
8
SPEAKER_00
That was not gonna be me.
8
SPEAKER_02
Did you see that cop on TV?
8
SPEAKER_02
Which cop?
8
SPEAKER_02
Yesterday.
8
SPEAKER_02
They were saying if someone breaks into your house in Florida, please shoot them.
8
SPEAKER_02
We prefer if you shoot them.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s what we ve gotten to now.
8
SPEAKER_02
Did you see that guy?
8
SPEAKER_02
Have you seen him, Jamie?
8
SPEAKER_02
I ll send it to you.
8
SPEAKER_02
I mean, he s getting a lot of heat today.
8
SPEAKER_02
Is he?
8
SPEAKER_02
He probably is.
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
8
SPEAKER_02
Not in Florida.
8
SPEAKER_02
I bet they re like, fuck yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
God bless Florida.
8
SPEAKER_02
Let me get this in a little, brother.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
Thank you, sir.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a year ago, I guess.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, is it?
8
SPEAKER_02
This is the same one?
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s the guy.
8
SPEAKER_02
He says.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
Saves taxpayers money if you shoot home invaders.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s probably right here.
8
SPEAKER_01
an unoccupied dwelling, felony third.
8
SPEAKER_01
Seven charges total.
8
SPEAKER_01
His bond s 157,500.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I want to say, ask to the person, we don t know what homeowner, which homeowner shot at him.
8
SPEAKER_01
I guess they think that they did something wrong, which they did not.
8
SPEAKER_01
If somebody s breaking into your house, you re more than welcome to shoot them in Santa Rosa County.
8
SPEAKER_01
We prefer that you do, actually.
8
SPEAKER_01
So whoever that was, you re not in trouble.
8
SPEAKER_01
Come see us.
8
SPEAKER_01
We have a gun safety class we put on every other Saturday.
8
SPEAKER_01
And if you take that, you ll shoot a lot better and hopefully you ll save taxpayers money.
8
SPEAKER_02
Hilarious.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s Florida.
8
SPEAKER_02
And then DeSantis just came out, because all these houses are getting, people are squatting, taking over people s houses in New York.
8
SPEAKER_02
I m sure you ve seen that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Lady got arrested because she changed the locks on her own house.
8
SPEAKER_02
Someone s squatting in her house.
8
SPEAKER_02
She got into the house, kicked them out, changed the locks.
8
SPEAKER_02
They called the cops.
8
SPEAKER_02
They said they re tenants.
8
SPEAKER_02
They arrest her.
8
SPEAKER_02
Took her away in handcuffs because squatters were in her own house.
8
SPEAKER_02
And then there s this guy on TikTok that started making videos explaining to people what the laws are and how you can get into people s houses.
8
SPEAKER_02
and how you can squat.
8
SPEAKER_02
And so it s a genuine problem.
8
SPEAKER_02
Because in Georgia, there s 1,000 houses right now that people are squatting in.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s a giant number of houses that squatters have just taken over these people s houses.
8
SPEAKER_02
Are the people out of town?
8
SPEAKER_02
Out of town, or it s a real estate holding.
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe you re trying to sell it.
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe it s your vacation house.
8
SPEAKER_02
Who knows?
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe you re fixing it up.
8
SPEAKER_02
Who knows?
8
SPEAKER_02
But no one s living in it.
8
SPEAKER_02
They move in.
8
SPEAKER_02
They take over.
8
SPEAKER_02
They have it now.
8
SPEAKER_02
Is that everywhere now?
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a lot of states, but it s not Florida and Florida.
8
SPEAKER_02
They re like fuck you Like like DeSantis just had a little press conference yesterday about it.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s like in Florida that does not fly You know, there s no way anyone s gonna squat in your house in Florida Which is what people want to hear
8
SPEAKER_02
You know, nobody wants their fucking, look, if you work really hard, you get a house and you have a second house, you can use it as a rental property or whatever, you re trying to make some money, and then someone takes over that, and the system works for them and not for you, there s a big difference between tenants and squatters.
8
SPEAKER_02
And if you can t make that differentiation, we got a real problem.
8
SPEAKER_00
We got a big problem.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s a big problem.
8
SPEAKER_00
Somebody s going to get shot.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s it.
8
100%.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s how this changes.
8
SPEAKER_00
This is how this always changes.
8
SPEAKER_00
Some guy comes home, what the fuck are you eight people doing here?
8
SPEAKER_00
You re not supposed to be here.
8
SPEAKER_00
He don t know nothing.
8
SPEAKER_00
He s from Russia.
8
SPEAKER_00
He don t know nothing.
8
SPEAKER_00
He s an old fucking guy from Iran or something.
8
SPEAKER_00
He don t know nothing.
8
SPEAKER_00
You re in my house.
8
SPEAKER_00
And they ll put him in jail.
8
SPEAKER_00
And they ll put him in jail, but who shoot those eight motherfuckers?
8
SPEAKER_00
Something bad will happen, but that s how it changes, Joe.
8
SPEAKER_02
The thing is, once people start going to jail for defending their own property,
8
SPEAKER_02
You ve made a mess.
8
SPEAKER_02
You ve made a mess.
8
SPEAKER_02
You made a giant mess.
8
SPEAKER_02
And then the criminals are going to be aware of this, and they already are.
8
SPEAKER_02
They already are.
8
SPEAKER_00
They re two steps ahead of you.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they re two steps ahead.
8
SPEAKER_02
They know what the rules are, and they re going to get attorneys that are going to work with them, and they re going to steal your house.
8
SPEAKER_00
So let me ask you this.
8
SPEAKER_00
You go on vacation with your wife.
8
SPEAKER_00
I move into your living room.
8
SPEAKER_00
You come back, and you re just going to greet me with nice eyes and say- I don t know how that works.
8
SPEAKER_00
You re going to call 9-1-1.
8
SPEAKER_00
There s a squatter here.
8
SPEAKER_00
You got to get him out.
8
SPEAKER_00
He s going to come, go, no.
8
SPEAKER_00
How long have you been here?
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
8
SPEAKER_00
We were in Europe.
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, whatever.
8
SPEAKER_00
Is that what you re fucking telling me?
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, I think some people can t physically do anything, right?
8
SPEAKER_02
Because they get in the house and there s men in there.
8
SPEAKER_02
Did you see about that lady in New York City?
8
SPEAKER_02
She went to clean out her mom s place and there were squatters in there and they killed her.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they just caught these guys young guys.
8
SPEAKER_02
They just the same thing they figured out There was no one in there if it broke in change the locks, whatever Fixed it stayed there You know how this changes brother?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s always one guy that makes an example makes a big deep example And then people go out when I will think twice about doing that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, it seems like the only way to really change is the law and
8
SPEAKER_02
It s just I don t understand why there s so many laws that have been around for so long that when you see common sense solutions like Ron DeSantis saying, no, you can t do that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Stop.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s not gonna happen in Florida.
8
SPEAKER_02
That should be every state.
8
SPEAKER_02
They should say, no, you can t steal people s houses.
8
SPEAKER_02
That should be simple.
8
SPEAKER_02
That has nothing to do with being
8
SPEAKER_02
Democrat or Republican.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s like stealing property, just like no one should be able to steal your car.
8
SPEAKER_02
No one should be able to steal your clothes.
8
SPEAKER_02
They shouldn t be able to steal your house.
8
SPEAKER_02
It seems that s logical.
8
SPEAKER_02
It has nothing to do with racism or xenophobia or white privilege or any of these dumb things they try to attach to this.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s
9
SPEAKER_02
just law and order.
9
SPEAKER_02
We have to have a set of laws that we all abide by if we re going to have a peaceful society where you don t create victims and you don t empower criminals.
9
SPEAKER_02
And the fact that that is complicated in 2024 is so strange to me.
9
SPEAKER_02
I just don t understand almost like it s on purpose, like it s meant to keep things chaotic.
9
SPEAKER_02
Keep us, you know, on our heels, keep us at each other s throats, keep us just trying to figure out what s the next problem they have to deal with.
9
SPEAKER_02
And all the while,
9
SPEAKER_02
There s all this shit going on in Ukraine.
9
SPEAKER_02
There s all this shit going on with green energy and Bill Gates is buying farmland.
9
SPEAKER_02
Like, God, can I have a fucking moment where I can just relax?
9
SPEAKER_01
Well, even the squatters thing.
9
SPEAKER_01
When did this start?
9
SPEAKER_01
This started coming up about three, four years ago during COVID, didn t it?
9
SPEAKER_01
Or was it around before?
9
SPEAKER_02
It was definitely around before, but I think it has ramped up considerably as things got more woke.
9
SPEAKER_02
Because I think as things get more woke, you start looking towards the rights of- Well, they re squatters.
9
SPEAKER_01
They don t have nowhere to go.
9
SPEAKER_02
Well, listen, no one is in that home and no one should have a home that is unoccupied where people are homeless.
9
SPEAKER_02
Like, okay.
9
SPEAKER_01
I m gonna take a piss.
9
SPEAKER_01
Go ahead.
9
SPEAKER_01
I ll wait till Law & Order puts out an episode on squatters, and I ll learn more about it.
9
SPEAKER_01
I ll come back and fucking drive.
9
SPEAKER_01
All right, we ll be right back.
9
SPEAKER_01
What did you bet?
9
SPEAKER_02
Dustin.
9
SPEAKER_02
You bet Dustin over Benoit Saint-Denis?
9
SPEAKER_02
I just looked at the card, and I m like, you know.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s a good bet.
9
SPEAKER_02
It was a good bet anyway.
9
SPEAKER_01
I like Cheeto and I like sugar, so I couldn t pick one there.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then all the hype around the guy and Dustin, I go, everybody s betting this fucking soldier.
9
SPEAKER_01
So I just took a chance to watch the fights.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s not like I bet all the fights, I just bet... I would have liked to see that fight with him not having staff.
9
SPEAKER_02
He was gonna have a hard time with Dustin s stand-up anyway.
9
SPEAKER_02
Dustin s stand-up is just sharper,
9
SPEAKER_02
more battle-tested.
9
SPEAKER_02
Benoit Saint-Denis started off as a judo guy, and he has very good stand-up.
9
SPEAKER_02
But there s levels, and I think Dustin s level is extremely high.
9
SPEAKER_02
His level of stand-up is extremely high.
9
SPEAKER_02
You see that, like, when he fought Max Holloway.
9
SPEAKER_02
He out-boxed Max Holloway in that fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
That was a big one.
9
SPEAKER_01
And Max can box.
9
SPEAKER_02
Max can box.
9
SPEAKER_02
Max can box.
9
SPEAKER_02
A lot of people are counting him out in this Justin Gaethje fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
You know, but he s got a lot of time to prepare for this.
9
SPEAKER_02
The first fight when he fought 55, when he fought Dustin, that was a short notice fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
He didn t have time to like really bulk up.
9
SPEAKER_02
Like, well, I don t know how short notice it was, but I know he didn t bulk up.
9
SPEAKER_02
I think he just tried to fight, you know, just be 145 and not cut weight, you know, which is his natural weight class.
9
SPEAKER_02
Who s in Newark?
9
SPEAKER_02
You doing that card?
9
SPEAKER_02
Let s pull it up.
9
SPEAKER_02
What s the Newark card?
9
SPEAKER_02
Have they announced that?
9
SPEAKER_02
tell you when that is.
9
SPEAKER_01
I know they have an Atlantic City card this month.
9
SPEAKER_01
I saw the ad.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s this weekend.
9
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_01
Chris Weidman s fighting.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
I think it s I think it s the first week in June.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s June 1st.
9
SPEAKER_02
UFC Newark.
9
SPEAKER_02
Who s that?
9
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s not on
9
SPEAKER_02
It s not on the list?
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s far ahead.
9
SPEAKER_02
So here we are in March, April, May, June.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s probably not scheduled yet.
9
SPEAKER_02
They probably have a tentative fight set.
9
SPEAKER_02
And it probably is dependent upon who wins what and who s healthy when.
9
SPEAKER_02
Bro, this one.
9
SPEAKER_02
Whitaker versus Hamzat Shamaev in Saudi Arabia.
9
SPEAKER_02
That one is gonna be fucking wild.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s a wild one.
9
SPEAKER_02
That is a wild fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
Calvin Gaslam versus D-Rod, that s a great fight too.
9
SPEAKER_02
Is that the only two fights that have been announced so far?
9
SPEAKER_02
Bro, Whitaker versus Hamzat is legit.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s a real fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s a real fight for Hamzat.
9
SPEAKER_02
Because Whitaker s a big dude.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s a big, I mean solid, beefy 185, former champion.
9
SPEAKER_02
You know, both guys started at 170, but they were cut.
9
SPEAKER_02
It was too hard to make the 170.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s a real 185-er, as opposed to, like, you know, they gave him Kamaru Usman, and Kamaru didn t have a chance to prepare for that.
9
SPEAKER_02
He had 10 days.
9
SPEAKER_02
You know, that s not enough time.
9
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I don t know what kind of shape he was in.
9
SPEAKER_02
Couldn t really test.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s always in shape.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s always in shape.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s always in shape.
9
SPEAKER_02
Sure.
9
SPEAKER_02
Famously Camaro has bad knees like real bad days So I don t know how hard he was training whether or not he prepares the way like maybe he only like Sacrifices knees during training and then when he s not training for a fight he takes it easy So he doesn t stay in the same kind of shape
9
SPEAKER_02
I don t know, but I know he was winning in the third round.
9
SPEAKER_02
I mean, Kamaru, if that was a five round fight, who knows how the fuck that fight would have went.
9
SPEAKER_02
And, you know, obviously Kamaru s world championship caliber, the best welterweight of all time by most people s accounts.
9
SPEAKER_02
And, you know, it s not enough time, not enough time to get a guy like that to prepare for Kamaru, to prepare for Hamzat.
9
SPEAKER_02
But at least we got a chance to see what Hamzat looks like against a world class, world championship caliber fighter.
9
SPEAKER_02
So this was a big one.
9
SPEAKER_02
This is Robert Whitaker with plenty of time to prepare.
9
SPEAKER_02
A guy who is just as legit as they get.
9
SPEAKER_02
Just beat Paul Costa.
9
SPEAKER_02
You know, that s a good fight.
9
SPEAKER_02
I like that.
9
SPEAKER_02
How about my boy Demetrius last weekend?
9
SPEAKER_02
How crazy is that?
9
SPEAKER_02
How crazy is that?
9
SPEAKER_02
He s so great.
9
SPEAKER_02
Mighty Mouse took on a guy who s 250 pounds in a jiu-jitsu tournament.
9
SPEAKER_02
You fucked me up, Mighty Mouse.
9
SPEAKER_01
I told you I m scared of Mighty Mouse.
9
SPEAKER_02
Fucking 250.
9
SPEAKER_02
And he tapped him.
9
SPEAKER_02
The dude was heavier than him by 100 pounds.
9
SPEAKER_02
The guy was enormous.
9
SPEAKER_00
The guy was so much bigger than him.
9
SPEAKER_00
That is great.
9
SPEAKER_00
When I saw that, I m like, God damn, he s great.
9
SPEAKER_00
He is great.
9
SPEAKER_00
And a brown belt.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yep.
9
SPEAKER_00
A fucking brown belt.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s great at everything, too.
9
SPEAKER_02
So this is him going through the tournament.
9
SPEAKER_02
Is that what this is?
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
So this is him and the giant dude.
9
SPEAKER_02
Look at the size difference.
9
SPEAKER_02
I thought it was Kurt Metzger.
9
SPEAKER_02
Look how big that dude is.
9
SPEAKER_02
This is big.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
But Mighty Mouse is so slick.
9
SPEAKER_00
Got him on like a trip.
9
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
9
SPEAKER_02
There it is.
9
SPEAKER_02
And then managed to stay on top, which is really crazy.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s just crazy that he couldn t get him off him.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s technique.
9
SPEAKER_02
Pretty wild that he s even willing to do this while he s competing.
9
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I think he s the champion over at 1FC still.
9
SPEAKER_02
So he s still doing MMA, still doing high-level championship fights, and he s fighting in the Gi, in the Gi tournament, which is just nuts.
9
SPEAKER_02
Gotta love him, man.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s just crazy that he stayed on top of this guy, then he got his back.
9
SPEAKER_00
Went to time, didn t it?
9
SPEAKER_02
No, I think he tapped the guy.
9
SPEAKER_02
Didn t he?
9
SPEAKER_02
I feel like he tapped him.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, maybe he did.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, here it is.
9
SPEAKER_02
He got him with some kind of a choke.
9
SPEAKER_02
So he s got his collar.
9
SPEAKER_02
He tapped him.
9
SPEAKER_02
Look at that.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s crazy.
9
SPEAKER_02
No audience.
9
SPEAKER_02
Look at that.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s the thing about jujitsu tournaments.
9
SPEAKER_02
No one s there.
9
SPEAKER_02
I mean, some of the best, look how he rolled him too.
9
SPEAKER_02
Holy shit.
9
SPEAKER_02
Pretty wild.
9
SPEAKER_02
Rolled him and held, it looks like he s holding onto the collar and tapping him with his collar.
9
SPEAKER_00
Like a bow and arrow?
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
Amazing.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s probably the best ever in terms of, I know.
9
SPEAKER_02
In terms of like just pure martial arts technique, I think the best expression of martial arts I ve ever seen is Mighty Mouse.
9
SPEAKER_01
Did you have Hodge on yet?
9
SPEAKER_02
Hodge Gracie?
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
No.
9
SPEAKER_01
He was looking to get on.
9
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_01
I ll get a hold of him.
9
SPEAKER_01
Because he was down here.
9
SPEAKER_01
Was three months ago.
9
SPEAKER_01
He was down with hands old school Somebody somewhere and one of my friends called me goes.
9
SPEAKER_01
Can you get a mile about it short notice Rogan booked?
9
SPEAKER_01
You know yeah advance Yeah, we re booked out pretty far.
9
SPEAKER_01
I get these I love watching jujitsu is so much like comedy So much man in what way?
9
SPEAKER_01
The longer you re in it, the prettier it gets.
9
SPEAKER_01
And the, you know, I m watching Tom, I m watching you the other night.
9
SPEAKER_01
We re at a point where it s effortless.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s second nature.
9
SPEAKER_01
You know what I m saying?
9
SPEAKER_01
Like, it s just beautiful to see.
9
SPEAKER_01
You know, comedy is great.
9
SPEAKER_01
The 10-year mark is great.
9
SPEAKER_01
The 20-year mark, something happens to you.
9
SPEAKER_01
It really does.
9
SPEAKER_01
Everything clicks.
9
SPEAKER_01
And it s like with this art, jujitsu, you get in there, you get beat up for a year.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then one day, you start doing little things, and you re like, oh, shit.
9
SPEAKER_01
This ain t that bad, you know?
9
SPEAKER_01
And it s the same thing.
9
SPEAKER_01
But once you put it all together, like when we were talking about Dave Battelle s special, it s a thing of beauty, man.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s a thing of fucking beauty.
9
SPEAKER_01
That s a thing of beauty.
9
SPEAKER_01
When my hands get sweaty like that, I know that that s fucking beautiful.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s years and years and years of work.
9
SPEAKER_01
I ve always loved, like you went to see the Black Keys last week.
9
SPEAKER_01
I love this.
9
SPEAKER_01
I love that you re going out and catching live music.
9
SPEAKER_01
It makes my dick hard.
9
SPEAKER_01
I wish I went to as much live music as you.
10
SPEAKER_00
But Jersey s a fucking nightmare.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know, you have the Starland Ballroom and shit and all.
10
SPEAKER_00
I just can t.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know, you got the heavy metal shit.
10
SPEAKER_00
I can t.
10
SPEAKER_00
But I wish, because that s how you get better at all this shit, is by getting entertained.
10
SPEAKER_00
That s how you... That s what Mooney always used to say.
10
SPEAKER_00
That s getting creative.
10
SPEAKER_00
When I went to a UFC fight and saw, on a hit of acid, and saw Anderson kick that dude in the face, I went right up to my room and wrote a joke.
10
SPEAKER_00
I m like, this is fun.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know, it just inspires you.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but they re that good We used to always talk about and this thing how he could look at you and pinpoint the shot and he was accurate That s a thing of art man.
10
SPEAKER_00
It isn t an art.
10
SPEAKER_00
What am I talking about?
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it is an art Dog, I swallow like two of these ends.
10
SPEAKER_00
What s gonna happen?
10
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna blow us in for it tonight in that fucking green room.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you re gonna shit out those little Oh Jesus I keep swallowing
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, don t swallow those little bags.
10
SPEAKER_01
You don t wanna swallow those.
10
SPEAKER_01
What are you gonna do?
10
SPEAKER_01
I don t think it s gonna hurt you.
10
SPEAKER_00
At this point, I used to swallow gum till I was 30.
10
SPEAKER_01
Shit.
10
SPEAKER_01
They used to say that gum gets stuck inside your body.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I swallowed gum for fucking years.
10
SPEAKER_01
I think that s a total myth.
10
SPEAKER_00
And once you re so deep in it, you re like, I m not gonna stop now.
10
SPEAKER_00
Now I spit it out.
10
SPEAKER_00
But before, I would always fucking swallow it.
10
SPEAKER_01
Well, have you seen that thing that people are doing now where they make them swallow a balloon?
10
SPEAKER_01
They swallow a balloon to deal with their weight loss?
10
SPEAKER_01
Have you seen that?
10
SPEAKER_01
No.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
So they swallow this bag.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s like this little tiny thing.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s about that big, and it s attached to a tube.
10
SPEAKER_01
And they swallow the whole thing.
10
SPEAKER_01
And the tube s coming out of their mouth as they re swallowing it.
10
SPEAKER_01
So they have a glass of water.
10
SPEAKER_01
They swallow it.
10
SPEAKER_01
It gets down in there.
10
SPEAKER_01
And then once it s in their stomach, they pump it up.
10
SPEAKER_01
And they fill this bag.
10
SPEAKER_01
And this bag takes up a lot of room in your stomach.
10
SPEAKER_01
So you get full much quicker.
10
SPEAKER_01
And so that s the thing that keeps people from, you know, you know.
10
SPEAKER_01
Overeat.
10
SPEAKER_01
They overeat.
10
SPEAKER_01
They can t stop themselves.
10
SPEAKER_01
They don t feel full.
10
SPEAKER_01
People want to feel full.
10
SPEAKER_01
And so this bag, you swallow this thing.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s called a gastric balloon.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
What do they inflate it with?
10
SPEAKER_01
Is it water?
10
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
10
SPEAKER_01
So they go in, swallow it, take this tube.
10
SPEAKER_01
I thought they were showing it for a second.
10
SPEAKER_01
They were showing it.
10
SPEAKER_01
And I think when you ve lost the weight that you want to lose, they can deflate it.
10
SPEAKER_01
But then my worry would be that then you have this stretched out stomach that needs to get full again.
10
SPEAKER_00
Dog, after I asked your advice on the gastric thing, you said you d look into it.
10
SPEAKER_00
I really thought about it.
10
SPEAKER_00
Not the gastric thing.
10
SPEAKER_00
Just all these get-out-quick things.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know?
10
SPEAKER_00
It s like Ozempic now.
10
SPEAKER_00
Did you hear what I was talking about last night on stage?
10
SPEAKER_00
Because I wrote that out the other day.
10
SPEAKER_00
It was a stupid joke, but I think that people are going to go on Ozempic now.
10
SPEAKER_00
All right?
10
SPEAKER_00
A lot of people.
10
SPEAKER_00
And the fat man s going to come back stronger.
10
SPEAKER_00
Like, what s the name of that show?
10
SPEAKER_00
The 600-lb Fat Dude?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, My 600-lb Life.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know, all this shit s going to come back bigger and stronger, fat dudes.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know what I m saying?
10
SPEAKER_00
Like, you re just doing all this shit, but if you just lift weights and walk a little bit and watch yourself just a little tiny bit, you know, all these get rich schemes.
10
SPEAKER_00
If I go down to 265, I ll do all that.
10
SPEAKER_00
Because then I get stuck at 265.
10
SPEAKER_00
Do you?
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
I get stuck at 271, 270.
10
SPEAKER_00
But when you did Weight Watchers, you got down low.
10
SPEAKER_00
How low were you when you were in Weight Watchers?
10
SPEAKER_00
Well, I am now.
10
SPEAKER_00
That s the lowest you ve ever been?
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, 277, 274.
10
SPEAKER_00
274 was my lowest weight.
10
SPEAKER_00
But I wasn t lifting weights.
10
SPEAKER_00
I thought you were lighter than that.
10
SPEAKER_00
No, I wasn t doing shit.
10
SPEAKER_00
I was walking and kickboxing, no weights.
10
SPEAKER_00
And now you re doing weights.
10
SPEAKER_00
No, you gotta do the weights at this age.
10
SPEAKER_00
I think so.
10
SPEAKER_01
Very important.
10
SPEAKER_00
I think it s important for bone density, for... Dog, that sarcopenia, you lose it quick.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
That s quick.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
And they re not asking you to fucking be an Olympic lifter.
10
SPEAKER_00
They re not asking you.
10
SPEAKER_00
Look at all the things.
10
SPEAKER_00
They re not asking you.
10
SPEAKER_00
They re just asking you for 30 minutes a day
10
SPEAKER_00
of resistance training.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, just a little bit of something to keep the muscles going.
10
SPEAKER_01
The thing about ozempic is some people have pretty bad side effects.
10
SPEAKER_01
Essentially, what it s doing is limiting your appetite.
10
SPEAKER_01
Essentially, it s doing something very similar to what this balloon thing does.
10
SPEAKER_01
And I think you can get that done with a high-protein diet.
10
SPEAKER_01
You can limit your appetite by just going on a carnivore diet.
10
SPEAKER_01
I know a lot of people that have done that and lost a lot of weight.
10
SPEAKER_00
Just carnivore?
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
You get satisfied way easier.
10
SPEAKER_00
Two eggs, six eggs for breakfast and a steak?
10
SPEAKER_01
Eggs and meat, and your body just adjusts.
10
SPEAKER_01
Your body turns the protein into glucose, and it turns the fats into ketones.
10
SPEAKER_01
For me, it just seems to work better.
10
SPEAKER_01
And I know a lot of people that have had a problem with carbohydrates, they start to, look, I had those guys do it for World Carnivore Month, the comics that I ve got working out at the gym.
10
SPEAKER_01
I m like, who wants to commit to this?
10
SPEAKER_01
Entire month of January, nothing but meat.
10
SPEAKER_01
And they did it, and they re like, dude, I feel so much more energetic.
10
SPEAKER_01
I m not tired in the middle of the day.
10
SPEAKER_01
I m like, yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s like a carb crash.
10
SPEAKER_01
You re getting like an insulin crash in the middle of your day because you re eating carbs and sweets and sugar and bread and pasta and rice and all this stuff.
10
SPEAKER_01
If you eliminate that stuff from your diet, it takes a while for your body to adjust.
10
SPEAKER_01
It took me like a couple of weeks when I first did it.
10
SPEAKER_01
But then once your body adjusts, you just feel like you have an extra gear.
10
SPEAKER_01
You have more energy.
10
SPEAKER_01
You feel clear-headed.
10
SPEAKER_01
You feel better.
10
SPEAKER_00
Why, just all that meat, Joe, scares the shit out of me, man.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah?
10
SPEAKER_00
In what way?
10
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
10
SPEAKER_00
I get a little iffy with a lot of meat.
10
SPEAKER_00
You get iffy?
10
SPEAKER_00
Late at night, I can probably blast fucking three eggs in a... Yeah, then have eggs.
10
SPEAKER_00
Scrambled eggs on a steak.
10
SPEAKER_01
Eggs are easy.
10
SPEAKER_01
Eggs are easy.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re easy to digest.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re super nutritious.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re so good for you.
10
SPEAKER_01
You could live off nothing but eggs.
10
SPEAKER_01
Eggs are great.
10
SPEAKER_01
Seven grams of protein.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
Three eggs is 21 fucking grams, man.
10
SPEAKER_00
You know?
10
SPEAKER_01
Not bad.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s fucking good for you.
10
SPEAKER_01
And all the stuff that says it s not good for you is nonsense.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s just good for you.
10
SPEAKER_01
Eggs are good.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re healthy.
10
SPEAKER_01
Does our girl like the carnivore diet?
10
SPEAKER_01
Who?
10
SPEAKER_01
Rhonda?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, she likes it.
10
SPEAKER_01
But I think she thinks that you should have vegetables too.
10
SPEAKER_01
And some people do think that.
10
SPEAKER_01
She got me eating blueberries like a motherfucker.
10
SPEAKER_00
Blueberries are great.
10
SPEAKER_00
She said it makes you smarter.
10
SPEAKER_00
Really?
10
SPEAKER_00
I m eating blueberries.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
10
SPEAKER_00
Watch one of the things.
10
SPEAKER_00
Blueberries actually make you smarter.
10
SPEAKER_00
Interesting.
10
SPEAKER_00
How does it make you smarter?
10
SPEAKER_00
I have no idea.
10
SPEAKER_00
I didn t listen to it after that.
10
SPEAKER_00
My attention span.
10
SPEAKER_01
You need more blueberries.
10
SPEAKER_00
I love her though.
10
SPEAKER_00
I do everything she says.
10
SPEAKER_00
Any time she, today she put a video of her fucking working out.
10
SPEAKER_01
I wonder how they would figure out whether or not blueberries make you smarter.
10
SPEAKER_01
Do they give you blueberries and make you take a test?
10
SPEAKER_01
She did a survey, you know her bro.
10
SPEAKER_01
A group of six people got together in Norway and fucking blueberries for a month.
10
SPEAKER_01
The thing about that though is you have to look at healthy subject bias or healthy statistics bias because the people that are in that group that are eating blueberries in the beginning or to begin with are probably healthier people.
10
SPEAKER_01
Healthier people might be a little smarter.
10
SPEAKER_01
you know, like more aware of what like the effects of eating good food does to your body.
10
SPEAKER_01
So healthy user bias is real.
10
SPEAKER_01
I don t know though.
10
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how they did the study.
10
SPEAKER_01
But a lot of those studies are, they re weird.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s just you get a sense of what s true and what s not, but also people manipulate those studies and they make studies designed to get the result that they re trying to achieve because they re trying to sell you something.
10
SPEAKER_01
I get very nervous when all these people are on this Ozempic stuff.
10
SPEAKER_01
I just get very nervous.
10
SPEAKER_01
Because Brian Simpson had a horrible side effect.
10
SPEAKER_01
He was fucked.
10
SPEAKER_01
He was wrecked.
10
SPEAKER_01
He stayed at home for days.
10
SPEAKER_00
Listen, from all the experience we have, of everything that s come out the last couple fucking days, the last couple years.
10
SPEAKER_01
Here it says, Dr. Rhonda Patrick, blueberry concentrate increased brain blood flow, brain activation, and working memory in adults compared to placebo.
10
SPEAKER_01
Mmm, concentrated blueberry juice.
10
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
10
SPEAKER_01
So it improves brain function in older people.
10
SPEAKER_01
Let s go.
10
SPEAKER_00
Let s get a blueberry smoothie.
10
SPEAKER_00
Get the party rolling.
10
SPEAKER_00
I do them all the time.
10
SPEAKER_00
Coconut water, blueberries, a little protein powder.
10
SPEAKER_00
Nice.
10
SPEAKER_00
Bango!
10
SPEAKER_00
They re good for you.
10
SPEAKER_00
I mean what stops that crash in the afternoon.
10
SPEAKER_00
I ve been getting it since I turned 58 well never slept before in the daytime now you re taking naps four o clock.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I mean my world ends
10
SPEAKER_00
It s the saddest thing, not even reefer, edibles, nothing.
10
SPEAKER_00
Once she gets home from school, I talk to her, we look at the homework.
10
SPEAKER_00
She goes to her room, I go downstairs, my wife gets home, and at about 4.15, I can t even eat.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s not about, I just gotta get up and walk to bed.
10
SPEAKER_00
She knows already.
10
SPEAKER_00
And I crash for an hour and four minutes, an hour and six.
10
SPEAKER_00
I get up for like 15 minutes, I feel like shit, then I m ready to attack 20 fucking people.
10
SPEAKER_00
The first 15 minutes, I always feel shitty, like, man, I shouldn t have slept in the afternoon.
10
SPEAKER_00
But some days I have it, some days I don t.
10
SPEAKER_00
How much carbs have you eaten?
10
SPEAKER_00
I eat that wheat bread in the morning.
11
SPEAKER_01
and I Really wanted to try intermittent fasting Yeah, I get dizzy like I get what Duncan gets like yeah You don t eat and drive like if I don t eat and drive a long distance.
11
SPEAKER_01
I m done I get dizzy and shit.
11
SPEAKER_00
I tell you what happened to my friend Tommy No, Tommy jr.
11
SPEAKER_00
He he was Shoveling snow cleaning his driveway out that you got called into work on a Sunday something happened
11
SPEAKER_00
And so he s shoveling his snow.
11
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, he s not in the best of shape.
11
SPEAKER_00
Shovel snow, heavy snow.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s all the whole driveway gets done drives in his car falls asleep at the wheel and slams into a wall.
11
SPEAKER_00
And he got pretty fucked up.
11
SPEAKER_00
Bunch of broken bones.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he s still not better.
11
SPEAKER_00
That was this was months ago.
11
SPEAKER_00
So what was the result of the nap from the shoveling?
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he just blacked out behind the wheel.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, just exhaustion, you know, not in the best of shape.
11
SPEAKER_00
Like, lifting snow is not good.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s a motherfucker, dude.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s a real workout.
11
SPEAKER_00
If you get wet snow and you got a whole driveway full of that shit, and you know, you re digging in and lifting it up and digging in and lifting it up your legs, your back, your arms.
11
SPEAKER_01
But if there s a reason, isn t the weather
11
SPEAKER_01
Contribute to that to what to that that cold when you come out like I have a friend I went to school with and I came back and how s your daddy died shoveling snow?
11
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s a heart attack thing.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s exertion.
11
SPEAKER_00
All right, if you re not in shape Shoveling snow is equivalent to doing like a hard CrossFit class If you re not in shape shoveling wet snow, no shit.
11
SPEAKER_01
Remember we live in Colorado.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah And the snow was light
11
SPEAKER_01
When it snowed in Jersey last time, I shoveled, and that s wet.
11
SPEAKER_01
The only thing that saved me, it s slow amounts.
11
SPEAKER_01
Three inches, four inches, and I go out there early and get it.
11
SPEAKER_00
You get an 18-incher?
11
SPEAKER_00
Then I can t do it.
11
SPEAKER_00
And then it gets a little warmer, and then it starts to melt, and then you basically got every shovelful is 45 pounds.
11
SPEAKER_00
MKBHD posted this when he was shoveling snow this winter.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, look, his heart rate s 118.
11
SPEAKER_00
1,200 calories in 90 minutes.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, 1,200 calories in 90 minutes of shoveling snow.
11
SPEAKER_00
So look at that.
11
SPEAKER_00
Every single smartwatch on Earth should have snow shoveling as a workout type.
11
SPEAKER_00
I don t know a soul in the Northeast that would disagree.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking hard.
11
SPEAKER_00
So if you re out of shape and you burn off a thousand calories like my boy Tommy, and then you get behind the wheel, you fucking black out, you know?
11
SPEAKER_00
Let s see if Whoop s got a snow shovel.
11
SPEAKER_00
Probably didn t drink enough water.
11
SPEAKER_00
I don t think Whoop has a snow shoveling
11
SPEAKER_00
I think you just have to put it in as a regular workout.
11
SPEAKER_00
But 90 minutes of work, so say if you have to leave your house at 6.30, you gotta be out there minimum 5 p.m.
11
SPEAKER_00
shoveling.
11
SPEAKER_00
You gotta go, I gotta leave in an hour and a half, here we go.
11
SPEAKER_00
So basically you have to have very little clothes on, because you re gonna sweat your dick off, and you re gonna be out there, every fucking shovel full is probably 35, 45 pounds,
11
SPEAKER_00
And then you look, what, you ve cleared four feet.
11
SPEAKER_00
Not even.
11
SPEAKER_00
And then you ve got to get in there and get it off the concrete and really scrape it down, otherwise it s going to melt and then freeze again.
11
SPEAKER_00
And then your whole garage, all the way down your driveway is going to be ice.
11
SPEAKER_00
So you ve got to really scrape it.
11
SPEAKER_00
The ice is snubbed with shell for a living.
11
SPEAKER_01
Fifteen bucks an hour in 1983.
11
SPEAKER_01
I would sit out there, shovel snow, and case the apartments.
11
SPEAKER_01
The whole Snowmass Village.
11
SPEAKER_01
Every time people go skiing, I knew when they were leaving, I knew the whole thing.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, we did that in Newton.
11
SPEAKER_01
We did that back in Boston.
11
SPEAKER_00
I shoveled snow for a living, man.
11
SPEAKER_01
It was eight hours a day.
11
SPEAKER_01
No, it was a full-time job in Snowmass Village.
11
SPEAKER_01
You just applied for it, 15 bucks an hour insurance.
11
SPEAKER_01
After 90 days, it was a ski pass.
11
SPEAKER_01
It was a job.
11
SPEAKER_01
It was a fucking job.
11
SPEAKER_01
That was your job.
11
SPEAKER_00
Have you been to Aspen lately?
11
SPEAKER_01
No.
11
SPEAKER_01
It s crazy.
11
SPEAKER_01
I m going this summer.
11
SPEAKER_01
I could just imagine.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s just Beverly Hills and the mountains.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I could just imagine.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s all these rich people, and it s really weird.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s not what it used to be.
11
SPEAKER_00
No, I know I m a weird person.
11
SPEAKER_00
You go watch those old documentaries when Hunter S. Thompson was there.
11
SPEAKER_00
Was he there when you were there?
11
SPEAKER_00
Did you ever see him?
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah?
11
SPEAKER_00
At Woody Creek?
11
SPEAKER_00
Did you go to the Woody Creek Tavern?
11
SPEAKER_01
I used to go to get weed and the nachos were fucking delicious there.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, food s still great there.
11
SPEAKER_00
Did you go?
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_00
Is it still open?
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s still open.
11
SPEAKER_00
I ate there a couple years ago.
11
SPEAKER_00
No shit.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_00
We went to Aspen for a ski trip and I said we got to go to Woody Creek Tavern.
11
SPEAKER_00
Gotta go pay respect.
11
SPEAKER_01
That was a place.
11
SPEAKER_01
Think about an 18 year old kid.
11
SPEAKER_01
Just just close your eyes for a minute.
11
SPEAKER_01
There it is.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I m talking about no.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yep.
11
SPEAKER_01
Still open.
11
SPEAKER_01
Oh that changed a lot dog.
11
SPEAKER_01
Did it.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_01
What changed.
11
SPEAKER_01
It looks like a place now.
11
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s a lot of photos of people on the wall.
11
SPEAKER_01
When I was going in there, it looked like fucking a barn.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah?
11
83.
11
SPEAKER_01
I had a friend, Kato.
11
SPEAKER_01
Keith Korn was his name.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I told him, I go, listen, you got to deal with me.
11
SPEAKER_01
I love you to death.
11
SPEAKER_01
Don t knock my door unless you got the best weed in town.
11
SPEAKER_01
And when you do have the best weed in town, knock on my door.
11
SPEAKER_01
I don t care if it s 2 in the morning, 3 in the morning.
11
SPEAKER_01
And he would come over and tell me, I got great weed.
11
SPEAKER_01
We got to go to Woody Creek Tavern.
11
SPEAKER_01
First time I went in there.
11
SPEAKER_01
Now, you want me to lie to you and tell you I knew who Hunter Thompson was?
11
SPEAKER_01
I didn t know who the fuck he was.
11
SPEAKER_01
First time I went in there, he was in there with Bill Murray.
11
SPEAKER_01
Really?
11
SPEAKER_01
And Don Johnson.
11
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
All right.
11
SPEAKER_01
First time I went in there.
11
SPEAKER_01
I think, no, the second time was Don Johnson.
11
SPEAKER_01
The first time it was Bill Murray.
11
SPEAKER_01
I got my weed, I got the nachos, I didn t say a word, I didn t need to think, you know, there was no pictures then.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I just walked out.
11
SPEAKER_01
And then on the way, the guy was telling me who Hunter S. Thompson was.
11
SPEAKER_01
Then a year later, the first movie came out.
11
SPEAKER_01
The first that was played by Bill Murray played him.
11
SPEAKER_01
That was with a Buffalo room.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s a good one.
11
SPEAKER_01
That s a good one.
11
SPEAKER_01
That s a good one And then I went in there a second time and I saw Don Johnson and that was fucking mind-blowing he was hotter than shit on Miami Vice and Then I went in there another time and one of the nitty-ditty grip dirt band
11
SPEAKER_01
were there with Hunter Thompson.
11
SPEAKER_01
It was a fucking party up there.
11
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I didn t, I was a kid.
11
SPEAKER_01
And they would tell you, if you go to the Aspen Airport, the bar, Clint Eastwood s there every night.
11
SPEAKER_01
Every fucking night.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I would not go up there.
11
SPEAKER_01
For some reason, I was just scared to meet Clint Eastwood.
11
SPEAKER_01
And you re young.
11
SPEAKER_01
And Don Henley picked me up hitchhiking.
11
SPEAKER_01
Really?
11
SPEAKER_01
One time, I got in the car and he had that song, it was 83, 84, so he just put out Dirty Laundry.
11
SPEAKER_01
And he was big, the boys of summer.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_01
I m in the fucking, because Aspen used to have a hitching post.
11
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so when you finish your job at Aspen, you can just go to a hitching post and stand out there.
11
SPEAKER_01
If people went like this, that means they weren t going down valley.
11
SPEAKER_01
So if they did this to you, that means they were just going to like Snowmass or something like that.
11
SPEAKER_01
Short trip.
11
SPEAKER_01
And people would pick you up all the fucking time and just talk to you.
11
SPEAKER_01
What s going on?
11
SPEAKER_01
Where you from?
11
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I m from there.
11
SPEAKER_01
You know, and the first time it was Don Henley.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I still lived in Basalt.
11
SPEAKER_01
And then, 4th of July, 83, I moved to Snowmass.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I was hitchhiking, and John Denver picked me up in a Jeep.
11
SPEAKER_01
John Denver picked you up?
11
SPEAKER_01
John fucking Denver, Joe.
11
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, come on.
11
SPEAKER_01
This isn t... No.
11
SPEAKER_01
And he s like, if you re not doing anything, I m doing the thing that he does a charity up there every fucking year or something.
11
SPEAKER_01
I didn t even know.
11
SPEAKER_01
I was just in the car.
11
SPEAKER_01
He s saying, come to the show?
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, like, come up.
11
SPEAKER_01
It s free or some shit.
11
SPEAKER_01
I m like... Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
to Snowmass.
11
SPEAKER_01
I don t know anybody.
11
SPEAKER_01
Then like a month later I go to Conoco in Old Snowmass.
11
SPEAKER_01
There s Snowmass Village and there s Old Snowmass.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I went to Old Snowmass because the guy was from New York and he had hot dogs.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I remember going there and seeing Goldie Hawn with Kurt Russell, like nothing.
11
SPEAKER_01
Sandals on the girl, Kate Hudson was a baby.
11
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
Maybe two, three, four with her brother, a little brother that was a little older than her maybe.
11
SPEAKER_01
I used to see them all the fucking time.
11
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_01
Sidney Poitier used to come into the video store.
11
SPEAKER_01
I was shit.
11
SPEAKER_01
That s when I asked Robin Williams for an autograph.
11
SPEAKER_01
He told me no, and he had body odor.
11
SPEAKER_01
He stunk so fucking bad.
11
SPEAKER_01
He had been in the coke thing for like four fucking days.
11
SPEAKER_01
Oh, no.
11
SPEAKER_01
That was a magical, magical place for a kid at 18.
11
SPEAKER_01
It was just something different, man.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I did a movie with Adam Sandler and Don Johnson was in the back, and I had to do a scene with him.
11
SPEAKER_01
And after every scene, we had to go into this closet, and I would talk to him.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I go, I still remember you when you got chased down Galena Street.
11
SPEAKER_01
And he goes, you remember that?
11
SPEAKER_01
When Miami Vice was hot as shit, like, 86, I was in Aspen.
11
SPEAKER_01
And one night, we were at, like, Patty Bugatti s, and you
12
SPEAKER_00
a bunch of people running down the street.
12
SPEAKER_00
It s a bunch of women chasing Don Johnson.
12
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
12
SPEAKER_00
He s fucking running with his bodyguard down the street of Aspen.
12
SPEAKER_00
Fucking crazy shit.
12
SPEAKER_00
I can t imagine what it s like now.
12
SPEAKER_00
It doesn t have that homey feeling.
12
SPEAKER_01
No, it s a different thing.
12
SPEAKER_00
On the way out of Aspen, when you made that turn out, before you hit that road, the 82, there used to be a fucking diner on the corner.
12
SPEAKER_00
And they were known for their crumb cake.
12
SPEAKER_00
And you could smell it.
12
SPEAKER_00
So all you smelt when you passed that was the crumb cake and the smell of the chicory.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like the burning in people s fucking tremendous.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like I d never smelled that before.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like all those things, it was just, I was like a kid in a candy store.
12
SPEAKER_01
It had to be a culture shock too, right?
12
SPEAKER_01
Coming from New Jersey.
12
SPEAKER_00
Shit.
12
SPEAKER_00
I remember the first month I d come home and yell at my roommates, what the fuck did you do to me?
12
SPEAKER_00
They re all faggots.
12
SPEAKER_00
They all say good morning and hello and, you know, people pulling over.
12
SPEAKER_00
Do you need a ride?
12
SPEAKER_00
Get the fuck out of here.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, no, no, you can t act like that.
12
SPEAKER_00
These people really want to help you.
12
SPEAKER_00
So, what brought you to Aspen in the first place?
12
SPEAKER_00
My brother, Jimmy Burkle, had, uh, he d gotten thrown out of the Air Force Academy, and he went back home to get his weights.
12
SPEAKER_00
To get his Olympic weights and speakers.
12
SPEAKER_00
We drove cross country.
12
SPEAKER_00
He said he was going to Aspen.
12
SPEAKER_00
I knew nothing about it.
12
SPEAKER_00
So you said, fuck it, I ll go for a ride?
12
SPEAKER_00
20 people were looking for me, so I had no choice.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I came up with like $1,500.
12
SPEAKER_00
I bought the car for us to drive in.
12
SPEAKER_00
The axle fell off.
12
SPEAKER_00
And it was weird, because he called me a date when he was leaving.
12
SPEAKER_00
But I was planning on robbing this bookmaker for a ton of dough.
12
SPEAKER_00
The guy had money in a linen closet.
12
SPEAKER_00
And he would have like a register.
12
SPEAKER_00
It was like hundreds in the top, fifties in the second shelf.
12
SPEAKER_00
And every time I went in there, he would just open up the closet and take money out and pay us.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I go, we got to rob this guy.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I was waiting to rob this guy.
12
SPEAKER_00
I didn t want to go.
12
SPEAKER_00
Cause I thought it was like a 20,000 day pay day.
12
SPEAKER_00
Right.
12
SPEAKER_00
So.
12
SPEAKER_00
I told him, just leave and I ll get a plane ticket.
12
SPEAKER_00
When he got to Pennsylvania, the axle fell.
12
SPEAKER_00
So he had to get towed back.
12
SPEAKER_00
And once he came back, I knew I had to go.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like, that was my sign.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like, I gotta go.
12
SPEAKER_00
He broke the fuck down, this guy, to come back.
12
SPEAKER_00
And then I said, fuck it, and I went with him.
12
SPEAKER_00
I took just, I was 18, I had no family, nothing going on and nothing to lose.
12
SPEAKER_00
My cousin was up there.
12
SPEAKER_00
I had a Cuban cousin, Tweedy, who got caught fucking throwing coke out of a bale.
12
SPEAKER_00
Remember I told you that?
12
SPEAKER_00
And then his nephew showed up to my show like a week later.
12
SPEAKER_00
He got coke out of a bale?
12
SPEAKER_00
He s the famous guy that he was throwing the coke out of an airplane.
12
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
12
SPEAKER_00
He lived in Aspen.
12
SPEAKER_00
That motherfucker did 25 years in America and another 15 in a Bahamian jail.
12
SPEAKER_00
Really?
12
SPEAKER_00
And he s out now.
12
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
12
SPEAKER_00
He s old.
12
SPEAKER_00
You know, he s old.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I went up there, and I just... It was, uh... It was perfect for what I was just coming out of.
12
SPEAKER_00
I lost my mother two years earlier.
12
SPEAKER_00
I needed to fucking get some traction.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I fell in that place.
12
SPEAKER_00
Can you imagine, man?
12
SPEAKER_00
I just fell into that fucking place.
12
SPEAKER_00
Pretty crazy.
12
SPEAKER_01
Pretty fucking crazy.
12
SPEAKER_01
But a good shift of perspective, right?
12
SPEAKER_01
You get to see a totally different way to live.
12
SPEAKER_00
Totally different.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I had to figure it out for myself.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I still remember being up there struggling and joining Colorado Mountain College.
12
SPEAKER_00
No high school diploma.
12
SPEAKER_00
Just walked in one day.
12
SPEAKER_00
I d like to take some classes.
12
SPEAKER_00
If you got the money, you could take them.
12
SPEAKER_00
Started taking six credits.
12
SPEAKER_00
Six credits a semester.
12
SPEAKER_00
Six credits.
12
SPEAKER_00
No high school diploma.
12
SPEAKER_00
Math classes, the whole fucking thing.
12
SPEAKER_00
History.
12
SPEAKER_00
Then I went to Boulder and I joined Continuing Ed at Boulder.
12
SPEAKER_00
And one day they came to me with a letter, Joe, and they re like, listen, you got too many credits for here.
12
SPEAKER_00
You got to transfer into a college.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, I got no high school diploma.
12
SPEAKER_00
And they re like, well, you can t take classes here.
12
SPEAKER_00
I didn t tell them that.
12
SPEAKER_00
I didn t have a high school diploma.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I applied for the University of Colorado on the Spanish program.
12
SPEAKER_00
Some program they had.
12
SPEAKER_00
You had to maintain a 2.0 and fucking garbage.
12
SPEAKER_00
They gave you a tutor.
12
SPEAKER_00
Really?
12
SPEAKER_00
They gave you money out the ass.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I transferred into the University of Colorado.
12
SPEAKER_00
They kept bugging me.
12
SPEAKER_00
Where s your high school transcripts?
12
SPEAKER_00
Where s your high school transcripts?
12
SPEAKER_00
I ll whip one up in a second.
12
SPEAKER_00
I didn t know how.
12
SPEAKER_00
I kept lying for them.
12
SPEAKER_00
They re coming.
12
SPEAKER_00
They re coming.
12
SPEAKER_00
And then finally I got arrested.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I had to take my GED.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I said, fuck it.
12
SPEAKER_00
And that s how I got in.
12
SPEAKER_00
When you got arrested, you had to take a GED?
12
SPEAKER_00
Well, when you get arrested, you know, when they were thinking about me, I had to get my... I had to show the judge I was trying to get my life together.
12
SPEAKER_00
And that was on the list.
12
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I see.
12
SPEAKER_00
So I took the GED, and then I went to the University of Colorado, and then I got thrown in prison.
12
SPEAKER_01
You re probably the only guy that s gone to college and then went back and got his GED.
12
SPEAKER_01
Can you fucking believe that?
12
SPEAKER_00
There was no computers back then.
12
SPEAKER_01
They just, yeah, whatever.
12
SPEAKER_01
It was Colorado at the time.
12
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
12
SPEAKER_01
Bring it next time.
12
SPEAKER_01
I mean, you could have had fake paperwork easy back then.
12
SPEAKER_00
How would anybody have known?
12
SPEAKER_00
I didn t want to do that.
12
SPEAKER_00
I wanted to do it, you know, like something.
12
SPEAKER_00
Everything else in my life was shit.
12
SPEAKER_00
Can I have one thing for myself?
12
SPEAKER_01
Right.
12
SPEAKER_01
Can I have one thing for myself that s... What were you planning on doing when you were going to college?
12
SPEAKER_01
Did you have a plan?
12
SPEAKER_01
No.
12
SPEAKER_01
No?
12
SPEAKER_01
Just take classes?
12
SPEAKER_00
Just took classes, you know, and then I went to Boulder.
12
SPEAKER_00
And when they transferred me in, those were real fucking, like, classes.
12
SPEAKER_00
And that s when I got locked up.
12
SPEAKER_00
That was the beginning of the end for me, so... But I took it seriously, Joe.
12
SPEAKER_00
Everything else was shit.
12
SPEAKER_00
Right.
12
SPEAKER_00
This is the only thing I have that s mine, that is not shitty, you know?
12
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes that s what a person needs.
12
SPEAKER_01
Something that they can dedicate themselves towards.
12
SPEAKER_01
Because they don t feel like they have anything, and there s no direction.
12
SPEAKER_01
They don t know what to do, and they just... You know, that old expression,
12
SPEAKER_01
idle hands of the devil s playground.
12
SPEAKER_01
That s real.
12
SPEAKER_01
That s real.
12
SPEAKER_01
That s real.
12
SPEAKER_01
That s very real.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
12
SPEAKER_01
If you don t have a purpose in life you don t have a direction that you feel like you should be going and you feel so lost and you can get sucked into all kinds of things and you re filled with anxiety and so then you escape with drugs.
12
SPEAKER_01
You re trying to find something to make you feel better because you just don t feel good and you feel like a loser.
12
SPEAKER_01
The only thing that makes you feel good is accomplishing things.
12
SPEAKER_01
Having a family, having loved ones, having friends, having a community.
12
SPEAKER_01
But accomplishing things, too.
12
SPEAKER_01
Those are the only things that make you feel better in life.
12
SPEAKER_00
You know, at that point in my life, I had my drug people and my criminal people, but I had a couple people that were trying to help me out.
12
SPEAKER_00
You know those people that bump into your life.
12
SPEAKER_00
I had a high school teacher that was helping me out.
12
SPEAKER_00
I had a bunch of people.
12
SPEAKER_00
And since I didn t have parents, I was dedicating whatever I was doing in their name.
12
SPEAKER_00
Is that hard to say or hard to understand?
12
SPEAKER_00
Like, I didn t have parents.
12
SPEAKER_00
So if you helped me out when I did something, I was doing it for Joe.
12
SPEAKER_00
To show him that I m fucking a good dude, that I m worth spending time with, you know?
12
SPEAKER_00
And I think even comedy, I love comedy.
12
SPEAKER_00
I love comedy, but I got out of comedy what I wanted, to become a man.
12
SPEAKER_00
That whole journey of comedy taught me how to be a man.
12
SPEAKER_00
It taught you how to watch other comics and be happy for them.
12
SPEAKER_00
It s a journey of education, being a comedian.
12
SPEAKER_00
It really is.
12
SPEAKER_00
And let me tell you something, to be a comedian, your IQ has to be somewhere high up there.
12
SPEAKER_00
Like the good ones, somewhere they gotta be up there.
12
SPEAKER_00
They re not stupid.
12
SPEAKER_00
No, we re not stupid.
12
SPEAKER_00
We figured out how to, you know, get to that next level.
12
SPEAKER_00
And that was, for me, that was the most important thing.
12
SPEAKER_00
Becoming a man.
12
SPEAKER_00
What is becoming a man?
12
SPEAKER_00
Just somebody who can contribute to society.
12
SPEAKER_00
Pay taxes, not have to steal.
12
SPEAKER_00
I wasn t looking to be a multimillionaire.
12
SPEAKER_00
That was never in my fucking realm.
12
SPEAKER_00
I just wanted to function first.
12
SPEAKER_00
That was it.
12
SPEAKER_00
I just wanted to be a functioning person, not with cocaine.
12
SPEAKER_00
You know, now,
12
SPEAKER_00
We were talking about something the other night.
12
SPEAKER_00
27 years I did that shit for.
12
SPEAKER_00
I did more when I was clean in 10 years than I did in those 30 years.
12
SPEAKER_00
So you re always thinking about what you lost, you know, and then I lost those two years to prison and, you know, I lost a lot of time fucking around.
12
SPEAKER_00
But look what I did accomplish in 10 years.
12
SPEAKER_00
It was mind-boggling, between the marriage, the child, the house, the career, Ari s story.
12
SPEAKER_00
You got on track.
12
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that was it.
12
SPEAKER_00
For me, it wasn t about having a jet plane.
12
SPEAKER_00
It was about being a fucking man.
12
SPEAKER_00
Just having a normal life.
12
SPEAKER_00
Being proud of yourself.
12
SPEAKER_00
That s it, you know.
12
SPEAKER_00
I got a three, I got a fucking, I got the Beatles.
12
SPEAKER_00
I got two other people, one is missing.
12
SPEAKER_00
You know, you have a big home.
12
SPEAKER_00
They re everything to me, but I never had that.
12
SPEAKER_00
Right.
12
SPEAKER_00
I never had that.
12
SPEAKER_00
I never had, you know, my mother had her life and I had my life.
12
SPEAKER_00
And I appreciated it because it prepared me to be the man I am today.
12
SPEAKER_00
But at that time, it was like that line from a Pink Floyd song.
12
SPEAKER_00
You re a stranger in your own home.
12
SPEAKER_00
You were a stranger in your own home.
12
SPEAKER_00
Your parents are doing what they were doing to try to keep the lights on.
12
SPEAKER_00
You re out there delivering fucking newspapers.
12
SPEAKER_00
You were driving a limo.
12
SPEAKER_00
You didn t know where the fuck you were going.
12
SPEAKER_00
But you figured it out.
12
SPEAKER_00
You didn t become stale.
12
SPEAKER_00
You didn t sit on your fucking ass.
12
SPEAKER_00
And that s what I think a lot of Americans are doing now.
12
SPEAKER_00
When I sit here and I go, I did this in 10 years.
13
SPEAKER_00
with nothing you know.
13
SPEAKER_01
That s the thing that people are not considering when they talk about universal basic income things like that.
13
SPEAKER_00
You need challenges.
13
SPEAKER_00
You just told me you have a challenge.
13
SPEAKER_00
You want to do something because it s a challenge.
13
SPEAKER_00
We challenge it.
13
SPEAKER_00
We open up the door.
13
SPEAKER_00
We re supposed to open up the mouth and fucking put a chair in the lion s mouth and sit.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s what makes us tick, is to always be working towards something.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I think everybody wants something like that.
13
SPEAKER_00
There s no fucking way, Universal.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t want you getting the same handout I get.
13
SPEAKER_00
Handouts don t work, Joe.
13
SPEAKER_00
They don t.
13
SPEAKER_00
Handouts do not work.
13
SPEAKER_00
They do not work.
13
SPEAKER_00
For certain people, they work.
13
SPEAKER_00
But for certain, in a mass, they don t work.
13
SPEAKER_00
People are going to buy stereos and concert tickets, and that comes first.
13
SPEAKER_00
Even that episode of The Sopranos, when the chick says, my phone s about to get turned off.
13
SPEAKER_00
I got no food, and Tony gives her money.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then she comes back.
13
SPEAKER_00
She goes, look at the shoes I got.
13
$600.
13
SPEAKER_00
And he goes, what happened to that?
13
SPEAKER_00
You got to live a little.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s everybody s mind.
13
SPEAKER_00
That was my mind.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, especially when you don t have anything.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, what s important?
13
SPEAKER_00
Then all of a sudden you have $1,200.
13
SPEAKER_00
Look at the fucking, Jamie, look at the credit card debt that this country s in right now.
13
SPEAKER_00
Did you see the credit card debt of all these $400 countries?
13
SPEAKER_00
You think people have this money?
13
SPEAKER_00
No, what s the credit card debt like?
13
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking insane right now.
13
SPEAKER_00
People are living off their fucking cards, Joe, since the pandemic.
13
SPEAKER_00
Now it s becoming second nature.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s just a card.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if you ve ever been in card debt,
13
SPEAKER_00
You re never gonna get out of it.
13
SPEAKER_00
Unless a chunk comes into your life.
13
SPEAKER_00
Not your little $4,000 tax return.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s gotta be a chunk or you re never gonna get out of that fucking debt.
13
SPEAKER_00
I was in huge debt.
13
SPEAKER_00
Huge.
13
SPEAKER_00
Huge.
13
SPEAKER_01
Credit card?
13
SPEAKER_01
No, I got rid of all that.
13
SPEAKER_01
What was your debt?
13
SPEAKER_00
You know, one day I woke up and I owed
13
SPEAKER_01
Look at this, maxed out inside America s credit card debt crisis and what we do next.
13
SPEAKER_01
And this is from CNET.
13
SPEAKER_01
It says, our $1.13 trillion in credit card debt, wow, is shattering lives.
13
SPEAKER_01
Everyday borrowers share how they re navigating this uniquely American debt machine.
13
SPEAKER_01
That s a lot of money, man.
13
SPEAKER_01
And the thing is, they re giving credit cards to people that are too young to really understand debt.
13
SPEAKER_00
You re giving credit cards to 18-year-olds.
13
SPEAKER_00
No way.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s when I failed.
13
SPEAKER_00
No way.
13
SPEAKER_00
And you know what, there s a lot of shit going on in colleges.
13
SPEAKER_01
Oh, the college thing is the worst.
13
SPEAKER_01
That s the worst scam.
13
SPEAKER_01
The worst scam is the education loans.
13
SPEAKER_01
It s the worst scam.
13
SPEAKER_01
Worst.
13
SPEAKER_01
It s the worst, because you re convincing kids that this is the only way they re going to be successful in life, and a lot of them don t even wind up using it, and then they re saddled down with debt.
13
SPEAKER_01
For the rest of their fucking life, and there s not a lot of good options other than that It s not like there s a lot of other things that you could look to like This is a better way to go like no like college for a lot of people is like the only path It seems reasonably lit like that path.
13
SPEAKER_01
I could see where that path is I m gonna walk down that path and then all of a sudden you re a hundred thousand in debt a hundred and fifty thousand in debt you re like oh
13
SPEAKER_01
And then you get a job out of college and it s for $52,000 a year.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re like, oh my God, how am I gonna pay this money off?
13
SPEAKER_01
Well, you re not.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re not.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re never gonna.
13
SPEAKER_00
And they don t stop.
13
SPEAKER_00
No.
13
SPEAKER_00
And it gets interest.
13
SPEAKER_00
In the middle of my debt, a fucking student loan popped up.
13
SPEAKER_01
Really?
13
SPEAKER_00
And they weren t taking no deals.
13
SPEAKER_00
They weren t taking a penny on the dollar.
13
SPEAKER_00
They wanted the full $3,000 from fucking 1980-something.
13
SPEAKER_00
They re not fucking around those school loans.
13
SPEAKER_00
We have a friend, a mutual friend, that decided not to get married.
13
SPEAKER_00
As much as he loved this fucking girl, broke up with her because of her debt.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he goes if I marry her.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, 15 grand a month.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, or something.
13
SPEAKER_00
She was something crazy.
13
SPEAKER_00
It was something crazy like her school loans.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_00
He goes, I can t marry into that.
13
SPEAKER_00
We re never gonna she has a kid in three years.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s on me.
13
SPEAKER_01
Right?
13
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s on you right away when you get married.
13
SPEAKER_01
And if she dies, you owe it.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s one of those dates on you.
13
SPEAKER_00
You can get married.
13
SPEAKER_01
And who knows how many?
13
SPEAKER_01
What is the number?
13
SPEAKER_01
Like, what is the number that she owed?
13
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember?
13
SPEAKER_01
Big, hundreds.
13
SPEAKER_00
Attorney, and she started taking money and taking world trips.
13
SPEAKER_00
Because once you get those student loans, you know, so again, it s a credit card mentality.
13
SPEAKER_00
I m already in debt.
13
SPEAKER_00
They re offering me this and a credit card to go to Europe, you know, one last blast to add to the fucking drama I already have.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then you gotta find some insanely rich guy to rescue.
13
SPEAKER_00
I remember.
13
SPEAKER_00
having no credit.
13
SPEAKER_00
Between you and I, I didn t even know what credit was.
13
SPEAKER_00
Okay?
13
SPEAKER_00
I had no idea.
13
SPEAKER_00
I knew cash.
13
SPEAKER_00
I came from a cash society.
13
SPEAKER_00
First time I walked into the University of Colorado and signed those fucking loan papers and that Pell-Graham paperwork, I think two days later I had a credit card with a $500 limit.
13
SPEAKER_00
I didn t even know how to handle it.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then they told me that you just call them and get the limit up.
13
SPEAKER_00
And I kept calling.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then you don t know.
13
SPEAKER_00
Your limit s still stuck.
13
SPEAKER_00
And now you have to go to a casino to have the fucking pit boss call your visa card.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s how they always got money.
13
SPEAKER_00
Just give your credit card to the pit boss.
13
SPEAKER_00
This is 30 years ago though, not now.
13
SPEAKER_00
where you could just give the credit card to the pit boss and he could call Visa for you.
13
SPEAKER_00
And they ramp it up.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they ramp it up.
13
SPEAKER_00
Not anymore.
13
SPEAKER_01
Good news, Mr. Diaz, you got an extra $2,000.
13
SPEAKER_01
Booyah!
13
SPEAKER_01
Let s go.
13
SPEAKER_01
Let s go.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, do you remember that scam where you would get like 10 cassettes for like a dollar?
13
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember that?
13
SPEAKER_01
I don t go to- Columbia House.
13
SPEAKER_00
Columbia House.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t go to Indiana.
13
SPEAKER_00
You never see me do anything in Indiana.
13
SPEAKER_00
I must owe Columbia House $10 million.
13
SPEAKER_00
Are you stupid?
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t go to Indiana.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s Terre Haute, Indiana.
13
SPEAKER_00
Right, look it up.
13
SPEAKER_00
I still remember where that motherfucker came from.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t even go to Indiana.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t even want him to remember.
13
SPEAKER_01
And then you would have to buy a new... Three albums and fucking... Was it every month?
13
SPEAKER_01
You d get 12 CDs for a penny.
13
SPEAKER_01
12 hot hits for a cool penny.
13
SPEAKER_01
I don t even think it was CDs back then.
13
SPEAKER_01
Look, it says cassettes or records.
13
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
13
SPEAKER_00
So how did they make money?
13
SPEAKER_00
Because everything was re-recorded.
13
SPEAKER_00
So they took Santana albums and then put it on like a cheap cassette or something.
13
SPEAKER_00
Oh, really?
13
SPEAKER_00
Like it was something.
13
SPEAKER_00
So they re-recorded it?
13
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I thought it was.
13
SPEAKER_00
No, no, it was real.
13
SPEAKER_00
It was real music.
13
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s the band.
13
SPEAKER_02
I thought it was different.
13
SPEAKER_00
But it s something.
13
SPEAKER_00
There s this catch here.
13
SPEAKER_00
There s some catch.
13
SPEAKER_00
So you had to buy, whatever, 12 hearts for a penny.
13
SPEAKER_00
You had to put the penny on the paper and scotch tape it.
13
SPEAKER_01
Stop right there?
13
SPEAKER_01
AOL may have had the most prevalent mail-in, magazine-based marketing campaign of the 90s, but a close second goes to both Columbia House, which was owned by Sony, and BMG, which was owned by RCA.
13
SPEAKER_01
It was a common sight in magazines of all shapes and sizes to see ads like the one above, which promoted extremely cheap collections of music in exchange for signing up for a membership.
13
SPEAKER_01
It even single-handedly helped some CDs become hits.
13
SPEAKER_01
Hootie and the Blowfish, for example, is said to have sold over 3 million copies of Crack Rearview through this service.
13
SPEAKER_02
I was going to try to skim through to find what it was.
13
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
13
SPEAKER_02
I think what they did is that you would sign up for a credit card bill with this and then all of a sudden you d start getting billed like 20 bucks a month.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_02
And it was really hard to stop it.
13
SPEAKER_00
There was no credit card in my day.
13
SPEAKER_00
They would just send the penny.
13
SPEAKER_00
You get 12.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I don t remember a credit card.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t remember signing up with a credit card.
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t think I had a credit card.
13
SPEAKER_00
You sent the penny.
13
SPEAKER_01
You sent the penny.
13
SPEAKER_01
Here it is.
13
SPEAKER_01
Degraded audio quality.
13
SPEAKER_01
In 94, Stereophile magazine published a feature analyzing whether the quality of Columbia House or BMG CDs was actually much lower than one could find in a traditional record store.
13
SPEAKER_01
The belief, which hasn t been confirmed, was that the service was using lower quality master tapes and on high quality equipment
13
SPEAKER_01
One could tell the difference, but that said it wasn t confirmed.
13
SPEAKER_01
Lack of royalty payments.
13
SPEAKER_01
Here s another one go up.
13
SPEAKER_01
So it says, Mental Floss notes that those free CDs generally cost Columbia House $1.50 each to create, a fairly low amount in overhead in those days.
13
SPEAKER_01
The reason why it was so low, well, they didn t have to pay royalties on the giveaways and made the money back on the margins.
13
SPEAKER_01
In other words, that Nirvana album you got for free from Columbia House netted Kurt Cobain a grand total of $0.
13
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
13
SPEAKER_01
So they didn t get paid for those.
13
SPEAKER_01
So the model the company used relied on customers essentially forgetting that they had subscribed to the service and then sending random CDs or cassette tapes to people that haven t asked for them, along with a bill.
13
SPEAKER_02
That s the same kind of thing happened with Girls Gone Wild.
13
SPEAKER_02
You d get one, and then they just keep sending you a new video every month.
13
SPEAKER_01
Tell us more, Jamie.
13
SPEAKER_01
What happened to you?
13
SPEAKER_02
I never paid for it, but I do remember getting a few free DVDs in the back.
13
SPEAKER_01
High profits after the freebies run out after you got these cassettes and discs ship shipped your way the company charged high amounts to consumers But they also kept most of the profits on the album sold Mental floss suggested the company made as much as seven dollars and fifty cents on each album shipped Wow I wonder how much the bands got paid for those from Columbia House aggressive Bill
14
SPEAKER_01
collection tactics.
14
SPEAKER_01
Consumer Affairs and Ripoff Record each report pages on the service and its collection agency Trident Asset Management that go back for miles.
14
SPEAKER_01
If you haven t paid for those CDs you got back in the 90s, they re probably still looking to shake you down for your money, Joey.
14
SPEAKER_02
I didn t do them in the 90s, I did them in the 70s.
14
SPEAKER_02
Long time ago.
14
SPEAKER_02
You know I m saying I still remember the album.
14
SPEAKER_02
I got you know what the fucking first time I got from Columbia house was what?
14
SPEAKER_02
Bye-bye, Miss American pie.
14
SPEAKER_02
Oh, Don.
14
SPEAKER_02
Whatever.
14
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, was it wasn t it done?
14
SPEAKER_00
What was his name I forget that I got like her John McClain John McClain John McClain
14
SPEAKER_02
I still remember that one.
14
SPEAKER_02
I bought, like, uh... My little one, Santana Braxis.
14
SPEAKER_01
That was a song that would come on at parties and everybody would just start singing.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_02
This would be a great fucking song.
14
SPEAKER_02
Great jam.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_01
Now, what else do we got?
14
SPEAKER_01
Didn t Tyson Fury have the entire audience sing that after one of his fights?
14
SPEAKER_01
I think Tyson Fury sang that fucking song... That s a jam.
14
SPEAKER_01
...to an entire audience.
14
SPEAKER_04
I said those who bring evil against me will not prosper.
14
SPEAKER_04
I said those who stand in the dark can never come into the light.
14
SPEAKER_04
All praise be to the one and only true God, Jesus Christ.
14
SPEAKER_04
Secondly, I just want to say a big shout out to Deontay Wilder.
14
SPEAKER_04
You know, he came here tonight, he manned up, he really did show heart of a champion.
14
SPEAKER_04
I hit him with a clean right hand and he got back up and battled on into round seven.
14
SPEAKER_04
He is a warrior, he will be back, he will be a champion again.
14
SPEAKER_04
The king has returned to the top of the throne.
14
SPEAKER_04
Big shout-out!
14
SPEAKER_04
Big shout-out!
14
SPEAKER_04
Top rank!
14
SPEAKER_04
Big shout-out, Frank Warren, Bob Arum, MTK Global, Barbeta, BT, Barbeta Codec UK, Wow Hydrate.
14
SPEAKER_04
Second of all, I said, I d sing a song tonight, didn t I?
14
SPEAKER_05
Look at him, look at him.
14
SPEAKER_03
A long, long time ago, I can still remember how them music used to make me smile.
14
SPEAKER_03
if you know the words.
14
SPEAKER_03
Sing along.
14
SPEAKER_03
I knew if I had my chance I could make those people dance and maybe they d be happy for a while but February made me shiver.
14
SPEAKER_03
Listen to this crowd.
14
SPEAKER_02
That s Don Irum, right?
14
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, Bob Irum.
14
SPEAKER_00
Bob Irum.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s amazing.
14
SPEAKER_02
I like this song better than the other one.
14
SPEAKER_02
When Gentiles Jump Up and Down.
14
SPEAKER_02
Which one?
14
SPEAKER_02
The one by Neil Diamond.
14
SPEAKER_02
They have the new commercial with a bunch of black people and Mexicans in a bar jumping up and down, and I m like, black people and Mexicans will never jump up to that song.
14
SPEAKER_02
What songs?
14
SPEAKER_04
It drives me crazy.
14
SPEAKER_04
You said it too fast.
14
SPEAKER_04
I m like having a mind blank right now, but it s like a baseball game is a lot.
14
SPEAKER_02
Drives me crazy.
14
SPEAKER_02
They sing it in the Hamptons.
14
SPEAKER_01
I know what it is.
14
SPEAKER_02
They sing it in the Hamptons all the time.
14
SPEAKER_02
Gentiles get together.
14
SPEAKER_02
Sweet Caroline.
14
SPEAKER_02
Sweet Caroline.
14
SPEAKER_02
Drives me fucking crazy.
14
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God.
14
SPEAKER_02
He sings that one too.
14
SPEAKER_02
I love Neil Diamond, but that song when it comes on a bar and I see people honking.
14
SPEAKER_01
It s not the song, it s people s reaction to the song.
14
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it drives me crazy.
14
SPEAKER_02
And now they have a Budweiser commercial or something with like brothers and Mexicans jumping up and down.
14
SPEAKER_02
Stop.
14
SPEAKER_02
Stop it.
14
SPEAKER_01
It s a great fucking song.
14
SPEAKER_01
Tyson Fury, recover to cover?
14
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_02
Motherfucker.
14
SPEAKER_05
Oh, I love that guy!
14
SPEAKER_02
That s the way to end the boxing match by singing.
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
14
SPEAKER_02
That s fucking great.
14
SPEAKER_01
Incredible.
14
SPEAKER_01
And he got the whole crowd to sing along, and they all stayed.
14
SPEAKER_01
Most people leave when the fight s over, especially when you win by knockout.
14
SPEAKER_01
They stayed because they want to hear him talk.
14
SPEAKER_01
You know how unusual that is, where a whole crowd is willing to stay to listen to the guy talk?
14
SPEAKER_01
Watch what happens at a UFC main event when, say, someone wins.
14
SPEAKER_01
There s a few people who stick around.
14
SPEAKER_01
They want to see the post-fight speech, but most people are headed to the fucking door.
14
SPEAKER_01
Get the fuck out of here.
14
SPEAKER_01
If Leon Edwards started singing Sweet Caroline,
14
SPEAKER_01
I d be great.
14
SPEAKER_02
I love Liana.
14
SPEAKER_01
That d be great.
14
SPEAKER_01
Or something.
14
SPEAKER_01
Something that people know.
14
SPEAKER_01
There s a few of those songs that everybody knows.
14
SPEAKER_02
I would love somebody with a Brazilian accent to sing Sweet Caroline.
14
SPEAKER_02
or our boy Romero to sing Sweet Caroline.
14
SPEAKER_01
Joey, to this day, that was one of my favorite podcasts of all time.
14
SPEAKER_01
You translating for Yoel Romero.
14
SPEAKER_02
He had me lost.
14
SPEAKER_02
Did he?
14
SPEAKER_02
My Spanish is fucking ... I got to be around those people every day.
14
SPEAKER_01
You re pretty good.
14
SPEAKER_01
You re pretty good.
14
SPEAKER_01
You re pretty good.
14
SPEAKER_01
I know he was ... It s just what a character that guy is.
14
SPEAKER_01
Bro, he just won.
14
SPEAKER_01
He still hits me up.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s a good, good guy.
14
SPEAKER_01
He just beat Tiago Silva in PFL versus Bellator.
14
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s us.
14
SPEAKER_00
I love you!
14
SPEAKER_01
He s the best, man.
14
SPEAKER_01
That guy.
14
SPEAKER_01
Imagine what would have happened if that guy got into MMA at 22.
14
SPEAKER_01
He didn t even get to the UFC until he was in his late 30s.
14
SPEAKER_01
That guy would ve killed everybody.
14
SPEAKER_01
What is he now?
14
SPEAKER_01
He s 46, 47.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he just beat Tiago Silva.
14
SPEAKER_01
Tiago Silva s still legit.
14
SPEAKER_01
Still fucking super dangerous.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s crazy.
14
SPEAKER_01
Tiago Silva went to a split decision with Jon Jones.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that guy.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yoel Romero just beat him.
14
SPEAKER_01
Make sure it s a split decision.
14
SPEAKER_01
That might not be correct.
14
SPEAKER_01
I wanna be sure about that.
14
SPEAKER_01
But it was a close fight, close fight.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s a good fighter.
14
SPEAKER_01
John fucked his knees up though.
14
SPEAKER_01
John destroyed that dude s knees.
14
SPEAKER_01
When is John coming back?
14
SPEAKER_01
Well, John tore his pec muscle.
14
SPEAKER_01
It s a big one.
14
SPEAKER_01
Tore it off the bone in wrestling practice.
14
SPEAKER_01
You could actually see it in the video.
14
SPEAKER_01
He shoots and they re in the scramble and he just screams and falls back and grabs his chest.
14
SPEAKER_01
Split decision, yeah.
14
SPEAKER_01
So on one judge s scorecard, Tiago Silva beat the greatest fighter of all time.
14
SPEAKER_01
Santos.
14
SPEAKER_01
Excuse me, Tiago Santos beat the greatest fighter of all time.
14
SPEAKER_01
And then Yoel just beat him.
14
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I know it s been a slide since then.
14
SPEAKER_01
What was that, 2017?
14
SPEAKER_01
What year was that, Jamie?
14
2016?
14
SPEAKER_01
UFC 239.
14
SPEAKER_01
I don t know why it says the date.
14
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t say the data on Wikipedia?
14
SPEAKER_04
I m looking at the main page.
14
SPEAKER_04
It s all sorts of stats, but not the date of the fight.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s interesting.
14
SPEAKER_01
19, okay.
14
SPEAKER_01
So that s not that long ago, man.
14
SPEAKER_01
Five years ago?
14
SPEAKER_01
Yoel is, I think he s at least 46.
14
SPEAKER_01
He turns 47 at the end of April.
14
SPEAKER_01
He looks fucking great.
14
SPEAKER_01
He looks fucking great.
14
SPEAKER_01
He moves fucking great.
14
SPEAKER_01
He looks great.
14
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t look slow.
14
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t look old.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s still America s top team?
14
SPEAKER_01
That s a good question.
14
SPEAKER_02
I don t know who he is.
14
SPEAKER_02
He always comes up with these Cuban scientists.
14
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_02
That come over from Cuba and stuff.
14
SPEAKER_01
Someone s doing something right.
14
SPEAKER_01
You know, they just popped one of the UFC guys.
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
14
SPEAKER_01
Four years.
14
SPEAKER_01
Four years.
14
SPEAKER_01
Four years.
14
SPEAKER_01
And he s 40.
14
SPEAKER_01
So that s essentially a career ender.
14
SPEAKER_01
You know.
14
SPEAKER_01
But when you re 40, dude, and you re fighting, and you re training every day, you re doing two-a-days and three-a-days, like, bro, your testosterone gets beat down.
14
SPEAKER_01
Your system gets beat down.
14
SPEAKER_01
You re putting a tax on your system that s very hard to deal with at that age.
14
SPEAKER_01
Really?
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah, it s a big difference.
14
SPEAKER_01
You get a guy who s 22 years old and you put him through a fight camp, that s a guy who can recover.
14
SPEAKER_01
As long as he s doing the right things, he s eating right, and he s sleeping right, and he s hydrating right, he can recover.
14
SPEAKER_01
You can get through the camp.
14
SPEAKER_01
It s hard as shit.
14
SPEAKER_01
I mean, a real fight camp for MMA is one of the most difficult endeavors in all of professional sports.
14
SPEAKER_01
You have to fight five rounds, 25 minutes of actual fighting in a championship level fight.
14
SPEAKER_01
and you re getting kicked and punched and wrestled and you re getting taken down you re trying to get back up the exertion level is so insane when you watch like cheeto versus uh sugar sean at the end of that fight even though sugar
15
SPEAKER_01
I took a shot and put on a clinic.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, he put on a clinic.
15
SPEAKER_01
At the end of that shot, he was beat the fuck up.
15
SPEAKER_01
He walked out of there with a foot cast, an arm cast.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s limping through the hallway.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, and he won.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then Cheetos just busted up, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
His whole face is busted up.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, those guys are exhausted.
15
SPEAKER_01
They went through hell.
15
SPEAKER_01
And it took them 12 weeks to get into kind of peak physical condition just to be able to do that.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, it s a crazy way to make a living, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
And you re depending on all these things that break so easy.
15
SPEAKER_01
this stuff this is how you re gonna use this to make your living and feed your family you have a wife and kids and you re gonna depend on your tissue and your bones to stay in place while you re smashing people in the face and you re getting smashed and you re getting your arm barred and you re getting your leg ripped all this shit is happening to you your next getting tweaked your back falls down you re tweaking your lower back here
15
SPEAKER_01
Hamstrings fucked your hip hurts now, and you re fighting hurt.
15
SPEAKER_00
You re gonna fight.
15
SPEAKER_00
They all fight hurt They all fight.
15
SPEAKER_00
They all fight.
15
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s it s it s like you said 12 weeks and shit happens Yeah, and you know, you got to figure out a way to make it into the the cage And so some of them like Tom Aspinall, he didn t even he fucked his rib up preparing for that fight with Sergei Pavlich so he s like he couldn t even wrestle and
15
SPEAKER_01
He s fighting this gigantic, terrifying Russian who knocks everybody into the dark dimensions, and he can t even wrestle.
15
SPEAKER_01
He can t do the one thing that you would think he needs to do to that guy.
15
SPEAKER_01
Pavlovich fucks everybody up.
15
SPEAKER_01
Fucked Derek Lewis up standing.
15
SPEAKER_01
He fucked a lot of people up.
15
SPEAKER_01
Taito Iwasa, he s fucking people up, beating them up standing.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s a dangerous cat.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s giant.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s giant.
15
SPEAKER_01
And Aspinall couldn t even, you know, but he had to take that chance, and it worked out for him.
15
SPEAKER_01
You know, but then look, Islam Makachev, you know, when he had the rematch with Volkanovsky, he s preparing for Charles Oliveira.
15
SPEAKER_01
Charles Oliveira gets cut.
15
SPEAKER_01
Makachev steps in or Alexander steps in with fucking 11 days notice.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he rematches with a guy who s gone through a full camp.
15
SPEAKER_01
It s crazy.
15
SPEAKER_01
That doesn t happen in boxing, ever.
15
SPEAKER_01
If Tyson Fury gets cut 10 days before he s supposed to fight Anthony Joshua, they don t just call Usyk up and go, what are you doing in 10 days?
15
SPEAKER_01
That never happens, ever.
15
SPEAKER_01
Especially at a championship level.
15
SPEAKER_01
Not just championship level, but the two guys who are widely considered to be the very best pound for pound fighters in the world.
15
SPEAKER_01
No.
15
SPEAKER_01
1 and No.
15
SPEAKER_01
2 up until the Ilya Tuporev fight.
15
SPEAKER_01
No.
15
SPEAKER_01
1 and No.
15
SPEAKER_01
2 in most people s eyes.
15
SPEAKER_01
Up until the second Makachev fight.
15
SPEAKER_01
Before that fight, it was Volkanovsky, it was the debate whether it was Makachev or Volkanovsky was No.
15
1.
15
SPEAKER_01
And so Makachev knocks him out with a head kick.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s only had 10 days to prepare.
15
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t look the same.
15
SPEAKER_01
He gets rocked.
15
SPEAKER_01
He gets beat up in that fight.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then he goes and fights Duport and he gets knocked out.
15
SPEAKER_01
So the whole world that you live in, you go from being the best pound for pound fighter on earth, the fucking man, to just months later, you re not even the best in your division anymore.
15
SPEAKER_01
The best guy in your division just knocked you unconscious.
15
SPEAKER_01
And now he has your belt and he s 10 years younger than you.
15
SPEAKER_00
Dude is tight, too Yeah at the party or whatever.
15
SPEAKER_00
He s fucking nice dangerous.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s tight that shit s tight Everything is so sharp.
15
SPEAKER_01
His technique is flawless.
15
SPEAKER_01
Everything s flawless.
15
SPEAKER_01
His boxing is so dangerous He s so dangerous everywhere.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s dangerous with submissions.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s dangerous with kicking.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s dangerous.
15
SPEAKER_01
His heart is dangerous
15
SPEAKER_01
He fought this dude, Jai Herbert, and he went up to 155 for that fight.
15
SPEAKER_01
So he s a 45-pounder, and he said, fuck it, I ll take a fight at 55.
15
SPEAKER_01
He gets head kicked in the first round by... Jai Herbert is a nasty stand-up fighter.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s so good.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s real slick.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s real, real good stand-up, like real sharp stand-up.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he caught Toporia with the perfect head kick.
15
SPEAKER_01
And Toporia, you re like, he s in real trouble.
15
SPEAKER_01
He got dropped.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he scrambled, got a hold of him.
15
SPEAKER_01
Next round, sent him into the dark lands, blasted him against the, I mean, literally slept him, face-planted him, and walk-off KO.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s an animal dude.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s a real problem because he s intelligent, he s dedicated, he s driven, he s got that kind of confidence that those championship guys have where they know they re the best even before they re the best.
15
SPEAKER_01
He knew he was the best even before and he s literally fighting the best guy ever in that division.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he s telling everybody, I m going to fuck this dude up inside of two rounds.
15
SPEAKER_01
Who s fighting next?
15
SPEAKER_01
Good question.
15
SPEAKER_01
I don t know who he s fighting next.
15
SPEAKER_01
So the he wanted to go up and fight Islam Makachev at 155.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then that was talk people talked about that.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then then they were also talking about sugar.
15
SPEAKER_01
Sean said he wanted to go up and fight to Poria.
15
SPEAKER_01
But Teporia said, no, I want you to fight Marab, who s also from Georgia, just like Ilya is born in Georgia.
15
SPEAKER_01
And Marab s the rightful guy that should be fighting in 35, so that s going to happen there.
15
SPEAKER_01
But if Sean gets past Marab, you could see a world where they can make a champion versus championship fight at 145.
15
SPEAKER_01
But Ilya Taporia essentially has kind of cleaned out the division already.
15
SPEAKER_01
The real dangerous guys, like Josh Emmett, he pieced that dude up.
15
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
15
SPEAKER_01
He pieced Josh Emmett up.
15
SPEAKER_01
He beat his ass.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s just so good, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he s so, like, he fought different with Emmett, because Emmett is terrifying.
15
SPEAKER_01
That guy is just a behemoth.
15
SPEAKER_01
At 145, that dude puts people to sleep.
15
SPEAKER_01
He s that guy that knocked out Bryce Mitchell with that one punch.
15
SPEAKER_01
That s right, that s right.
15
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
15
SPEAKER_01
Josh Emmett is a terrifying striker.
15
SPEAKER_01
He just throws everything into every punch.
15
SPEAKER_01
And he knows all he has to do is hit you once.
15
SPEAKER_01
And so that s how he fights.
15
SPEAKER_01
And so Ilya just fought real clever.
15
SPEAKER_01
Just moved in, moved back, moved in, moved back, didn t charge forward, just aware of the power until he could start piecing him up.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then just started piecing him up.
15
SPEAKER_01
Tactically, he s so smart.
15
SPEAKER_01
So it s not just his ability, his skill.
15
SPEAKER_01
It s knowing when to apply it and how to adjust to different kinds of fighters.
15
SPEAKER_01
But the Jai Herbert one might ve been the most impressive one.
15
SPEAKER_01
Dude, he got, see if we can find that.
15
SPEAKER_01
He got head kicked.
15
SPEAKER_01
He gets hits with a switch high kick off the left leg, right to the face, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, like this, like boom, like he just dropped, which is, you know, 99 times out of a hundred.
15
SPEAKER_01
It s like the beginning of the end.
15
SPEAKER_01
Look at this.
15
SPEAKER_01
Look at that left high kick.
15
SPEAKER_01
Watch this.
15
SPEAKER_01
BOOM!
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, dude.
15
SPEAKER_01
He got fucking cracked.
15
SPEAKER_01
On the chin, dude.
15
SPEAKER_01
Look how perfect it is.
15
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s perfect.
15
SPEAKER_01
I mean, it s a perfect high kick.
15
SPEAKER_01
And Jai Herbert s dangerous, dangerous too.
15
SPEAKER_01
But he got lucky that he got a hold of a leg, and also that he didn t try to stand up.
15
SPEAKER_01
He actually got knocked down.
15
SPEAKER_01
If he was standing up, Jai Herbert could have caught him with a bunch of other shots and put him away.
15
SPEAKER_01
Because once you get hurt, if you can get a hold of someone, it gives you at least seconds to try to clear your head.
15
SPEAKER_01
Because sometimes it takes your head a few seconds to reboot.
15
SPEAKER_01
And you can still hold on to someone while that s happening, and maybe you can survive.
15
SPEAKER_01
So in his case, he did.
15
SPEAKER_01
But now show the knockout.
15
SPEAKER_01
Show Taporia knocking out Jai Herbert.
15
SPEAKER_01
So in the second round, he just times him with this right hand from hell.
15
SPEAKER_01
And it s a good fight up until then, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
Jai Herbert is a tall, look at this, he s a tall 55.
15
SPEAKER_01
And you can see by his movement, like very skillful striker, very dangerous, and long.
15
SPEAKER_01
So Ilya gets him up against the cage.
15
SPEAKER_01
Look at the rip to the body.
15
SPEAKER_01
Boom.
15
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
15
SPEAKER_01
Bro.
15
SPEAKER_01
But look at the combination before that.
15
SPEAKER_01
He sets it up by a left to the body.
15
SPEAKER_01
Watch this left to the body.
15
SPEAKER_01
Watch it.
15
SPEAKER_01
Boom, bang.
15
SPEAKER_01
Hard left hook to the body, right hand over the top.
15
SPEAKER_01
Look at this, boom, right to the liver, boom.
15
SPEAKER_01
And bro, that was a solid liver punch too, because you see him breathe out after he gets hit.
15
SPEAKER_01
Show that right there again, right before, watch.
15
SPEAKER_01
He gets hit with his left of the body, look at him breathe out.
15
SPEAKER_01
See his mouth fill up?
15
SPEAKER_01
That s like, ooh.
15
SPEAKER_01
It s a perfect liver punch.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then a perfect right hand behind it.
15
SPEAKER_01
So he might ve been knocked out just from that liver punch, son.
15
SPEAKER_01
He might have went down a half a second later from that liver punch.
15
SPEAKER_01
That s how good that punch is.
15
SPEAKER_01
And then he hit some of that right hand over the top.
15
SPEAKER_01
Topori is terrifying.
15
SPEAKER_01
Terrifying.
15
SPEAKER_00
To go back to what you were talking about earlier with Yoel and this fucking guy I was watching this morning.
15
SPEAKER_00
He s 39 years old.
15
SPEAKER_00
Fucking LeBron.
15
SPEAKER_01
LeBron looks awesome.
15
SPEAKER_01
He looks awesome, man.
15
SPEAKER_01
Did you see Chael Sonnen s been ranting and screaming?
15
SPEAKER_01
He s on steroids.
15
SPEAKER_01
Everyone knows he s on steroids.
15
SPEAKER_00
Guy s 39.
15
SPEAKER_00
He s averaging 35 minutes a fucking game.
15
SPEAKER_00
He s top five in the NBA in minutes.
15
SPEAKER_00
Do they test NBA players?
15
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
15
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
16
SPEAKER_01
Jamie, what are they testing for?
16
SPEAKER_01
Are they testing for, like, testosterone placement?
16
SPEAKER_01
Alcohol.
16
SPEAKER_02
No reefer.
16
SPEAKER_01
Not reefer, no.
16
SPEAKER_01
Never.
16
SPEAKER_01
They can t.
16
SPEAKER_01
They can t.
16
SPEAKER_01
They won t have a league.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s too good for... It s the same reason why it s so good for pool.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s got to be so good for basketball.
16
SPEAKER_01
Puts you in that zone.
16
SPEAKER_01
You just feel it.
16
SPEAKER_01
You feel things more.
16
SPEAKER_02
Anything that reefer puts you in that... You know, Leo and I, we had music on.
16
SPEAKER_02
Led Zeppelin came on, and I was sitting there, and all of a sudden I went back, and I m like, to be honest with you, this is the reason why I smoke pot.
16
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
16
SPEAKER_02
That s the reason I would never have done a drug, but I knew was gonna sound a lot better with that reefer It does isn t it crazy food tastes better.
16
SPEAKER_02
That s feels better lifting weights.
16
SPEAKER_02
Oh, yeah Oh my god, you feel my god riding a bike with reefer.
16
SPEAKER_02
The only thing I don t do reefers roll Fuck you.
16
SPEAKER_02
You don t do jujitsu.
16
SPEAKER_02
No, no, no interesting.
16
SPEAKER_02
I
16
SPEAKER_02
No.
16
SPEAKER_02
A lot of people do.
16
SPEAKER_02
I don t give a fuck.
16
SPEAKER_02
Including this guy.
16
SPEAKER_02
I know.
16
SPEAKER_02
No, no.
16
SPEAKER_02
That donkey dude?
16
SPEAKER_02
No.
16
SPEAKER_02
I went to his seminar.
16
SPEAKER_02
He was smoking.
16
SPEAKER_02
Jeff?
16
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
16
SPEAKER_01
He was hilarious.
16
SPEAKER_01
Jeff Glover.
16
SPEAKER_01
Oh.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s hilarious.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s hilarious, dog.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s fucking good, too, man.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s good, too.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s good.
16
SPEAKER_02
You know, that Reefers shit, somebody mounted me once and I was high on an edible.
16
SPEAKER_02
That was it.
16
SPEAKER_02
Time out.
16
SPEAKER_02
Time out.
16
SPEAKER_02
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
16
SPEAKER_02
It s amazing for me.
16
SPEAKER_02
Oh, no.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
Anything like that, writing, oh, my God.
16
SPEAKER_01
For fearing, for writing, yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
Writing, when you giggle.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
And you re like, what the fuck?
16
SPEAKER_02
But this, what I wanted to talk to you about was recuperation at that age.
16
SPEAKER_02
Gotta be really smart.
16
SPEAKER_01
Well LeBron spends a lot of money.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s like famous for spending money on his recovery, right?
16
SPEAKER_01
massages everything cold plunges and Everything gotta give it to him.
16
SPEAKER_01
You have to he s at the very top of his game and he s worth a billion dollars You know, I mean, he s a billion dollar property.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s at the top of his fucking game.
16
SPEAKER_01
I mean I
16
SPEAKER_01
And he looks like a superhero.
16
SPEAKER_01
I mean, LeBron looks like a superhero.
16
SPEAKER_01
You look at him, you re like, good Lord.
16
SPEAKER_01
Show a photo of him, like his body.
16
SPEAKER_01
Is there any shirtless photos of LeBron?
16
SPEAKER_01
Let me take my pants off.
16
SPEAKER_02
You don t know any.
16
SPEAKER_02
You won t know this because it s basketball.
16
SPEAKER_01
Dude, look at that.
16
SPEAKER_01
And how tall is he?
16
SPEAKER_00
6 8 , 7 8 .
16
SPEAKER_00
LeBron diet LeBron James diet reveals he eats like shit, but trains He eats a lot of candy, but as that s when he was younger to row he I mean now Yeah, he s good, too, man He s also slimmed down from where he was back when he was younger like his first five years in the league They argued he could be up to 300 pounds
16
SPEAKER_00
So is this him now?
16
SPEAKER_00
That s him now.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s probably closer to like 260 Okay, so he definitely looks slimmer in that picture than he did in the other picture where he was lifting weights But that was also right off, you know right out of in the gym.
16
SPEAKER_01
Mm-hmm It says that he appears to have lost 10 to 12 pounds.
16
SPEAKER_01
It said in that photo.
16
SPEAKER_01
So yeah, you see that photo in the gym Still shredded.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it looks like an MMA fighter He looks like he could be like a UFC heavyweight champion.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s shredded.
16
SPEAKER_01
I
16
SPEAKER_02
I got no problem with a professional athlete doing whatever he needs.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, well as long as they re not a fighter.
16
SPEAKER_01
Because you re a professional.
16
SPEAKER_02
The thing about fighters is... No, I know that stuff, but I m talking about like for recovery and all that stuff.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
He looks great.
16
SPEAKER_02
The new shit they re doing in training with people.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
Is just, you know, I go to basketball games.
16
SPEAKER_02
I told you, I see those athletes.
16
SPEAKER_02
That Jason kid from fucking Boston?
16
SPEAKER_02
Dog, when he goes to the basket, you re not stopping him.
16
SPEAKER_02
It s unreal how quick he is.
16
SPEAKER_02
You re watching, and he s six foot six.
16
SPEAKER_02
These guys are super fucking athletes.
16
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s like everything else, Joey.
16
SPEAKER_01
They get a chance to see the people before them, and then they get better.
16
SPEAKER_01
They get better than those people.
16
SPEAKER_01
Like, every sport, if you go on... There s always gonna be the few outliers, like Muhammad Ali.
16
SPEAKER_01
If you took Muhammad Ali from 1967 and brought him to the heavyweight division today, he d be fucking people up.
16
SPEAKER_01
They wouldn t know what to do with him.
16
SPEAKER_01
There s so many fighters he would fuck up.
16
SPEAKER_01
But he s just a complete outlier, but and you know, there s other like Michael Jordan complete outlier any generation you put him and he s gonna fuck people up Larry Bird complete outlier any generation he s gonna score from the From from the court, but if you get the overall
16
SPEAKER_01
Bet the athletes like UFC today is the best example of it because it s one of the clearest you could go to 93 2024 and you see this massive evolution massive you see these people that are fighting on the under cards of these fight cards like you like the UFC fight cards the the fight night cards the smaller cards they do at the Apex Center you re seeing World Championship caliber fighters from 10 years ago like they would probably beat a lot of world champions and this is their UFC debut
16
SPEAKER_01
That s how good these guys are.
16
SPEAKER_01
They ve evolved a lot.
16
SPEAKER_01
Everything has evolved a lot.
16
SPEAKER_02
Everything.
16
SPEAKER_02
It s amazing.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s amazing, the training, when you look at them.
16
SPEAKER_01
Did you see this past fight night, this last weekend, with Rose Namajunas?
16
SPEAKER_01
No, no.
16
SPEAKER_01
In the undercard, this kid, Cameron Simon, who s like one of the best guys at 135, very slick striker, South African kid, like very tough, very good kid.
16
SPEAKER_01
He fought this dude, Peyton Talbot.
16
SPEAKER_01
And I d never seen this guy fight before.
16
SPEAKER_01
This kid is a motherfucker, dude.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s so good.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s 25 years old.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s fought like once, I think, in the UFC and once in the Contender Series.
16
SPEAKER_01
And this is my first time watching him.
16
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, Jesus Christ, man.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s so fucking good.
16
SPEAKER_02
Well, now they re doing this since they re 12.
16
SPEAKER_01
Mm-hmm.
16
SPEAKER_02
Now they re doing this at 12, and they re dedicated to MMA.
16
SPEAKER_02
There s MMA classes.
16
SPEAKER_01
See if you can find that knockout.
16
SPEAKER_01
See if you can find the knee he would ve hit him with in the first round.
16
SPEAKER_01
Like, in the beginning of the fight, he was fucking him up.
16
SPEAKER_02
I think everything has a window.
16
SPEAKER_02
Like, that s what we were getting to.
16
SPEAKER_02
Like, especially with the UFC, it s... When you get to the UFC, you have to give yourself a window.
16
SPEAKER_02
Because after a while, that s the thing about fighting.
16
SPEAKER_02
It ll go on forever.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, there s very few guys that are like Jim Miller.
16
SPEAKER_01
Jim Miller still fighting at a world-class level.
16
SPEAKER_01
Brad Tavares could still knock you the fuck out.
16
SPEAKER_01
Oh, Brad Tavares.
16
SPEAKER_01
He just beat Chris Weidman.
16
SPEAKER_01
I love Brad.
16
SPEAKER_01
And he looked fantastic.
16
SPEAKER_01
He looked fantastic.
16
SPEAKER_01
Those were the leg kicks, right?
16
SPEAKER_01
He was kicking them, leg kicking them.
16
SPEAKER_01
Kicking the shit out of them.
16
SPEAKER_01
And just looked slick.
16
SPEAKER_01
Looked very good.
16
SPEAKER_01
Very good with his stand-up.
16
SPEAKER_02
But now you got these guys.
16
SPEAKER_02
Remember, these guys got into it in 18 when they got out of college.
16
SPEAKER_02
They were wrestlers.
16
SPEAKER_02
He s kid.
16
SPEAKER_02
You re not as young man.
16
SPEAKER_01
That s really I was about Brad Brad was thrown to the lion s den when he was like in his early early 20s.
16
SPEAKER_01
I think that s only Brad Tavares.
16
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
16
SPEAKER_01
I think he s only 33.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s a kid.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s been around forever.
16
SPEAKER_01
He fought Yoel back in the day.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s fought a lot of fucking people, man.
16
SPEAKER_01
A lot of people, man.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
So those guys, but those guys come one in a dozen.
16
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
16
SPEAKER_02
You know, longevity.
16
SPEAKER_02
Right.
16
SPEAKER_01
You know?
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, Jim Miller s the most extreme example of it.
16
SPEAKER_01
He fought in UFC 100, fought UFC 200, and he s going to fight in UFC 300.
16
SPEAKER_01
Like, what the fuck, dude?
16
SPEAKER_01
And he looks awesome.
16
SPEAKER_01
And he still teaches?
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_01
Well, no, he doesn t do that anymore.
16
SPEAKER_01
That s also what s helped him a lot.
16
SPEAKER_01
He sold his gym.
16
SPEAKER_01
OK.
16
SPEAKER_01
It was too much.
16
SPEAKER_01
He explained it when he came on the podcast.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s just too much work.
16
SPEAKER_01
You re dealing with so many different things.
16
SPEAKER_01
And so now that he could just concentrate on just his camps and get ready, it s much better.
16
SPEAKER_01
He probably still teaches some classes.
16
SPEAKER_01
I think he enjoys teaching.
16
SPEAKER_01
I think running the gym was the real problem.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s a lot of work, man.
16
SPEAKER_01
I think I m correct.
16
SPEAKER_01
A lot of come and going jujitsu.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_01
A lot of come and go, man.
16
SPEAKER_01
Also, you re dealing with personality issues.
16
SPEAKER_01
And if you run a business, you have to deal with people that are arguing with other people there.
16
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, oh, God.
16
SPEAKER_01
And then this guy might be stealing money, or this guy might be doing something he s not supposed to be doing.
16
SPEAKER_01
He said he was doing this, but he s doing that.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s trying to cut corners.
16
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, fuck.
16
SPEAKER_01
And you have to deal with this and that.
16
SPEAKER_02
In the business you have to be there.
16
SPEAKER_02
And these martial artists that open up these schools and open up like a chain of them.
16
SPEAKER_02
And they re never at one of them.
16
SPEAKER_02
You never know what s going on.
16
SPEAKER_02
You never know.
16
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you d have to really trust the people that are running that school for you.
16
SPEAKER_01
They d have to be like really well trained and a part of your family.
16
SPEAKER_01
You know, you could pull it off.
16
SPEAKER_01
Like the Machados have done that.
16
SPEAKER_01
They ve had, Machados have had
16
SPEAKER_01
Various Machado satellite schools that are owned by Jean Jacques black belts, and they re always great.
16
SPEAKER_01
They re great.
16
SPEAKER_02
They re always great John Jacques is on a different level Yeah, and and by me I have the Gracie s mm-hmm, and they got it down to a science They really you know I was talking to Rallo the other day, and we re just talking I go well think what s around me I?
16
SPEAKER_02
Got Tom.
16
SPEAKER_02
I got the Silver Fox
16
SPEAKER_02
I got what s-his-name-is-an-hour from me, Ricardo Almeida.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_02
I got all those guys right there.
16
SPEAKER_02
We were talking about it.
16
SPEAKER_02
He s like, you re in heaven there.
16
SPEAKER_01
It s a great jujitsu environment.
16
SPEAKER_02
It s a beautiful fucking, and it s all Henzo.
16
SPEAKER_02
Henzo, all those black belts, the Silver Fox, fucking... Henzo s got an empire.
16
SPEAKER_02
A fucking empire.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s got guys in LA.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s got guys here.
18
SPEAKER_00
I do it on the bike.
18
SPEAKER_01
I do it on the bike.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s great for cardio.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s one of the best ways to develop cardio, is the Tabata interval, for whatever reason.
18
SPEAKER_01
I don t know why.
18
SPEAKER_01
But so we did that at the end.
18
SPEAKER_01
So we did the kettlebell workout, and then we do the sled, and then we hit the bag.
18
SPEAKER_01
I was putting them through, like, real workouts.
18
SPEAKER_01
And then we do sauna and cold plunge.
18
SPEAKER_00
You know, but that all goes with being a good comic.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s work.
18
SPEAKER_00
You know that?
18
SPEAKER_00
That whole workout thing.
18
SPEAKER_00
When I wasn t doing it, you re not that good.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s work, and it makes you feel better about yourself.
18
SPEAKER_01
And it makes you feel better.
18
SPEAKER_01
It makes your body feel better.
18
SPEAKER_01
It makes your brain feel better.
18
SPEAKER_01
It also makes you feel like you re not lazy and stagnant.
18
SPEAKER_01
Like, there s been times where I get up, and for whatever reason, I m just not feeling it, and I fuck off, and I look at my phone, and I make some phone calls, and then the next thing you know, I m not getting in the cold plunge.
18
SPEAKER_01
The next thing you know, I m not going to work.
18
SPEAKER_01
And the day, or I m not going to work out before work, and the days that I realize I m doing that, like stop, put your phone down, get in the water, were the days that I was happier.
18
SPEAKER_01
I always felt better if I did what I needed to do, because then I felt like I ve already done the thing that was the hardest thing to do today.
18
SPEAKER_01
That s how I feel, yeah.
18
SPEAKER_01
So now I m on a good path.
18
SPEAKER_00
My day s on a good path.
18
SPEAKER_00
You see what happens to me when I eat?
18
SPEAKER_00
I gotta do everything early.
18
SPEAKER_01
My world is early.
18
SPEAKER_01
Early s good, though.
18
SPEAKER_01
I m an early guy.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s good, getting it out of the way.
18
SPEAKER_01
It also sets up the rest of your day.
18
SPEAKER_01
Get that really physically difficult thing done early, and then it sets up the rest of your day.
18
SPEAKER_01
But the thing is, like, what I m trying to say is, like, I m not immune to those feelings of laziness and those feelings of procrastination.
18
SPEAKER_01
You know, and there s a handful of days over the last few years that I ve done nothing and should have, should have worked out.
18
SPEAKER_01
And I just fucked off too much.
18
SPEAKER_01
And I just did wind up doing it.
18
SPEAKER_01
And my mind was like, yeah, you work out basically every day.
18
SPEAKER_01
Like, take a day off, pussy.
18
SPEAKER_01
But then I don t feel that good.
18
SPEAKER_01
Then the rest of the day, I m like, why did I do that?
18
SPEAKER_01
Now I feel stupid.
18
SPEAKER_01
Now I feel like I m lazy or I m not centered, but you know, I need to do something.
18
SPEAKER_01
For my brain as much as for my body, I need to do something every day.
18
SPEAKER_00
I haven t slept while I m here, you know.
18
SPEAKER_01
Really?
18
SPEAKER_00
Five hours, six hours.
18
SPEAKER_00
Last night I went to bed at fucking two.
18
SPEAKER_00
Oh, it s so fun.
18
SPEAKER_00
We re having so much fun.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I got up at 4.40.
18
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no.
18
SPEAKER_00
I m like, what the fuck, Joey?
18
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I stayed up till about six.
18
SPEAKER_00
When I hit the crib again, I got up at fucking 8 to call my daughter, and I got up like at 9, 8.30.
18
SPEAKER_00
I was up.
18
SPEAKER_00
I get dressed, I roll a joint, I brush my teeth, and I fucking get out of the house.
18
SPEAKER_00
I go for a nice walk in Austin.
18
SPEAKER_00
You ve been enjoying it here?
18
SPEAKER_00
Very much so.
18
SPEAKER_00
I m looking at it.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s a different look.
18
SPEAKER_00
It looks completely different.
18
SPEAKER_01
Just come down every now and again.
18
SPEAKER_00
I am.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, once a month.
18
SPEAKER_00
I m coming down next month.
18
SPEAKER_01
A few days.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I need two tickets for that 420 show for the El Nido boys.
18
SPEAKER_00
OK, let s go.
18
SPEAKER_00
Talk I went to a restaurant.
18
SPEAKER_00
I want to tell you about I got a dish.
18
SPEAKER_00
I ve been dying to tell you It s called char and Red Bank.
18
SPEAKER_00
I told you I got two chefs at the Jiu-Jitsu school I got your boy from a steakhouse 57 the head chef.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I got the other this guy from Charlie kept on me Come on.
18
SPEAKER_00
Come on.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s in Red Bank, you know 30 minutes.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t have babysitters.
18
SPEAKER_00
I
18
SPEAKER_00
I went, good Friday, big fucking mistake.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s a steakhouse.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I told him, and he goes, I get it.
18
SPEAKER_00
He goes, I m gonna hook you up.
18
SPEAKER_00
This motherfucker gave me yellow fin tacos.
18
SPEAKER_01
Right, because you re not supposed to eat meat on Friday.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t give nothing up for Lent, but I just won t eat meat, which is easy for me.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t give a fuck.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I had the lobster dumplings, and then he sent over to my wife, who doesn t give a fuck about Catholicism.
18
SPEAKER_00
So she ordered.
18
SPEAKER_00
But we ate so many appetizers, she s like, Joey, I can t eat this dog.
18
SPEAKER_00
She ordered short rib over gnocchi with a garlic sauce, and the gnocchi just melted in your mouth.
18
SPEAKER_00
It was tiny, homemade gnocchi.
18
SPEAKER_00
I didn t eat it that night.
18
SPEAKER_00
I got high the next day, and I saw it was in the refrigerator, and I tasted it.
18
SPEAKER_00
Joe Rogan.
18
SPEAKER_00
I had orgasms come out of every hole in my fucking body.
18
SPEAKER_00
You understand me?
18
SPEAKER_00
I called him and he goes, Joey, if you want, I ll stop by.
18
SPEAKER_00
I live right around the corner.
18
SPEAKER_00
I m like, don t you fucking dare.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t want that shit around me every fucking day.
18
SPEAKER_00
It was so fucking good, man.
18
SPEAKER_01
It was so fucking good.
18
SPEAKER_01
That Il Nido s amazing.
18
SPEAKER_01
There s something about Jersey Italian food.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s on another level.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s very difficult to get stuff like that out here.
18
SPEAKER_00
I can t wait for Sunday.
18
SPEAKER_00
To come home?
18
SPEAKER_00
No, I m coming home tomorrow.
18
SPEAKER_00
But Sunday, I go to Easter Sunday.
18
SPEAKER_00
And I go to Osteria, they got this fucking, they make a sundae sauce, $33.
18
SPEAKER_00
Dog, $33.
18
SPEAKER_00
A meatball this big, they give you a fucking pork rib that s in the sauce, a big stick, like a big pork rib.
18
SPEAKER_00
They give you a brajo and a big sausage for $33.
18
SPEAKER_00
I usually split it with my daughter.
18
SPEAKER_00
I can t eat that whole fucking thing.
18
SPEAKER_00
The meatball s to die for.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s to fucking die for.
18
SPEAKER_00
He gets pissed at me.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s like, yeah, you tell people about the meatball, nobody s gonna spend money on the big shit.
18
SPEAKER_00
They come in here for the sundae sauce.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking, you know, who makes sundae sauce, Joe?
18
SPEAKER_01
Well, that was always an Italian thing.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t have time.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I don t know how to make it, and the people, you know, they make it, but this is no drama.
18
SPEAKER_00
You just go down there, oh, I love all that shit.
18
SPEAKER_00
But I even got, like now, I just split a plate now.
18
SPEAKER_00
I can t eat the whole thing no more.
18
SPEAKER_00
Those days are gone.
18
SPEAKER_00
The meatball s so fucking good though, Joe.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, there s not a lot, I mean, I haven t eaten at too many Italian places out here, but there s, I m sure there s a bunch.
18
SPEAKER_01
How you been to Sammy s?
18
SPEAKER_01
I heard Sammy s is great.
18
SPEAKER_01
You ever been there?
18
SPEAKER_01
That s the spot that people keep talking about.
18
SPEAKER_00
There s just some spot.
18
SPEAKER_00
There s a place in fucking Secaucus or Rutherford.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s owned by Specia.
18
SPEAKER_00
You eat this meatball, your heart ll stop.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s that fucking good.
18
SPEAKER_00
But El Nido got some good Wyoming meatballs too.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_01
Good ones.
18
SPEAKER_01
Well, let s let that old immigrant-style East Coast, Jersey, Italian food.
18
SPEAKER_01
Well, lamb.
18
SPEAKER_00
Different.
18
SPEAKER_00
They put everything in there, don t they?
18
SPEAKER_00
Veal and fucking meatballs, just fucking delicious.
18
SPEAKER_01
Especially the sundae sauce, when you would see the oils bubbling up on the surface of the pot, and the grandmother be stirring with a wooden spoon.
18
SPEAKER_01
Your mom make this stuff?
18
SPEAKER_01
My grandmother did.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, my grandmother was the big cook.
18
SPEAKER_01
It was insane.
18
SPEAKER_01
My grandmother could cook.
18
SPEAKER_01
She d make homemade pasta.
18
SPEAKER_01
She d have the kitchen table, flour out there, rolling everything, making it with a roller, cranking the pasta through the machine.
18
SPEAKER_01
Look at that.
18
SPEAKER_01
Good Lord.
18
SPEAKER_01
How s a person supposed to eat well and healthy when that s available?
18
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s Osteria, right?
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_00
That looks pretty fucking good, Joey.
18
SPEAKER_00
Doug, they re not fucking around.
18
SPEAKER_00
No.
18
SPEAKER_00
But you guys aren t either.
18
SPEAKER_00
I gotta give credit where credit is due.
18
SPEAKER_00
Those fucking tacos the other night.
18
SPEAKER_00
And that s just from the truck on the street.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s a truck on the street.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but guess what?
18
SPEAKER_00
I can t get that in Jersey.
18
SPEAKER_00
Mexican food is god-awful.
18
SPEAKER_01
Really?
18
SPEAKER_00
I even told one of the waitresses we were talking, I go, the Mexican food s terrible.
18
SPEAKER_00
I go, the refried beans look like they were made from, you know, like a powder, like powder mashed potato.
18
SPEAKER_00
And the kid goes, they got those.
18
SPEAKER_00
I go, I knew they were fucking powdered refried beans.
18
SPEAKER_00
They have powdered refried beans?
18
SPEAKER_00
The Mexican food is horrible.
18
SPEAKER_00
I don t know where these Mexicans came from.
18
SPEAKER_00
They re not apocalyptos.
18
SPEAKER_00
The fucking food is fucking terrible.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s the only thing I miss about LA.
18
SPEAKER_00
That and that fucking sushi.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I missed the fucking albacore plate with the garlic on top and the onions.
18
SPEAKER_01
LA s got, well, had good food, but goddamn, they killed so many restaurants.
18
SPEAKER_00
I didn t even know the sushi place I was going to was dead.
18
SPEAKER_00
Sushi Dan is dead.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, a lot of them went under.
18
SPEAKER_00
But bro, what you ve done down here is fucking, I gotta commend you, man.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s a great club.
18
SPEAKER_00
Like I told you, I was blown away the first night.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s been pretty fun.
18
SPEAKER_01
And it s a year now.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s crazy as it seems.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s already been a year.
18
SPEAKER_00
And everybody s come through here.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_01
Everybody s come through here.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s crazy.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s been crazy.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s been awesome.
18
SPEAKER_01
You did good, brother.
18
SPEAKER_01
And we re just getting started.
18
SPEAKER_01
And we re just getting started.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s been beautiful having you down here, too.
18
SPEAKER_00
Oh, just to see what you re doing and to see the club.
18
SPEAKER_00
There s so much enthusiasm at that club.
18
SPEAKER_00
You know, when you walk in, people are happy.
18
SPEAKER_00
Like I told you, I love to spectate.
18
SPEAKER_00
I m a spectator, bro.
18
SPEAKER_00
I love to sit, smoke pot, and watch.
18
SPEAKER_00
Don t say a fucking word.
18
SPEAKER_00
And when I watched the way the people were interacting with the people coming in and everything, it was beautiful.
18
SPEAKER_00
I was like, there s not a prick in here.
18
SPEAKER_00
You don t feel like, you know what I m saying?
18
SPEAKER_00
And you feel definitely safe in there.
18
SPEAKER_00
Damn.
18
SPEAKER_00
Fucking cops, everybody s in there.
18
SPEAKER_00
So it s great.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s a great thing, man.
18
SPEAKER_00
And it s family.
18
SPEAKER_00
You can feel it in the air.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_00
And that s what s... There s no hang.
18
SPEAKER_00
There s a hang, but there s no hang.
18
SPEAKER_00
And that hang is perfect there.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s perfect.
18
SPEAKER_00
When that green room... Dog, when I took my clothes off the first night, that clothes smelled so bad.
18
SPEAKER_00
From all cigarettes?
18
SPEAKER_00
Cigar, cigarettes, acid, speed, fucking... Got any of the acid around here?
18
SPEAKER_00
Nope.
18
SPEAKER_00
You don t have none?
18
SPEAKER_00
No.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yes, you do.
18
SPEAKER_00
No.
18
SPEAKER_00
You hear that from me?
18
SPEAKER_00
No, I wouldn t do that to you.
18
SPEAKER_00
What about, what do you got, no smelling salts?
18
SPEAKER_00
You didn t give me none.
18
SPEAKER_01
We always have smelling salts.
18
SPEAKER_00
That fucking, that zen fucked me up.
19
SPEAKER_00
before.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
Twelve milligrams.
19
SPEAKER_00
Holy shit.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s six.
19
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, you took it right after we ate and you were like.
19
SPEAKER_00
No, I was eating.
19
SPEAKER_00
That s when I swallowed the first one at the restaurant on top of the sushi.
19
SPEAKER_00
So that motherfucker.
19
SPEAKER_00
And then I had another one in my pocket.
19
SPEAKER_00
Because the zins, when you take one, sometimes you take two.
19
SPEAKER_01
Right.
19
SPEAKER_01
They stick together.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_01
Don t swallow them.
19
SPEAKER_01
That s my advice to you.
19
SPEAKER_00
Well, I already swallowed like six of them, so it s too fucking late.
19
SPEAKER_00
Well, no more.
19
SPEAKER_00
Don t swallow anymore.
19
SPEAKER_00
No, I won t swallow no more, but I gotta get some more of these Zins, brother.
19
SPEAKER_00
All right.
19
SPEAKER_00
I ll get some for you.
19
SPEAKER_00
I love you with all my heart.
19
SPEAKER_00
I love you to death, man.
19
SPEAKER_00
Thank you for having me down here.
19
SPEAKER_00
You re the best.
19
SPEAKER_00
Family is family.
19
SPEAKER_00
Comedy family is comedy family.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
And that s what these motherfuckers will never, ever understand.
19
SPEAKER_02
The people that don t get it will not get that, because they haven t experienced it, but we re lucky.
19
SPEAKER_00
To cheer for each other, to fucking, you know, I m so happy for Tony and the Garden, I m so happy for Red Band, you know.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s amazing.
19
SPEAKER_00
And that s what being a comic is about, is also fucking giving love to these people, going, you know what, you re doing good, man.
19
SPEAKER_00
The girls, I love the girls.
19
SPEAKER_00
You know, Sarah s down there this week.
19
SPEAKER_00
She was happy to see me, I was happy to see her.
19
SPEAKER_00
You know, Kim s coming tonight.
19
SPEAKER_00
So, Eleanor.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s been great having Eleanor in town too.
19
SPEAKER_00
Steve Simone, fucking Ron White to see him.
19
SPEAKER_01
Brian Simpson just released his Netflix special.
19
SPEAKER_01
Donnell was here.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s been amazing.
19
SPEAKER_02
It s been amazing.
19
SPEAKER_02
It s a great town now.
19
SPEAKER_00
I love you.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s really popping.
19
SPEAKER_00
I love you too, brother.
19
SPEAKER_02
I miss you like a motherfucker.
19
SPEAKER_02
I miss you too, but we ll do this more often.
19
SPEAKER_00
I ll come down here next month, and then I ll come down here in May.
19
SPEAKER_02
Then I get too hot for Uncle Joe.
19
SPEAKER_02
Okay, don t worry about it.
19
SPEAKER_00
We ll take a couple months off.
19
SPEAKER_00
And then by September, I think I could do my own residency with my own 45 minutes.
19
SPEAKER_00
Let s go.
19
SPEAKER_01
Let s go, Joey.
19
SPEAKER_00
That s my plan.
19
SPEAKER_00
Beautiful.
19
SPEAKER_00
All right.
19
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
19
SPEAKER_00
Bye, everybody.
19
SPEAKER_00
Love you guys.