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SPEAKER_03
The Joe Rogan Experience.
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Let s go, Dead Soda.
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Let s go, baby.
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What s happening?
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I forgot how good a weed you have.
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This is Cal Williams  weed.
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Is it really?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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Oh, shit.
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I m going to start talking shit on everyone in the business.
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And that ain t never been a day that Shane Gillis ain t never texted me, you re gay.
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Always calling me gay.
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We had Cat Williams ride the racing simulator, and I filmed it and put some of it up on Instagram.
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He s like, this is how he drives.
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This is a normal thing.
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He does this because he does this in real life.
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Yeah, I would love for Cat Williams to be the voice of my self-hate.
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He s like, you ain t never gonna be nothing, baby.
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You suck.
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It s like, I know Cat.
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Just to wake you up every day and get you to go to work.
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Yeah, he s the new David Goggins.
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He s like, pain is good.
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Feel everything bad, pimping.
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I m out here golfing at $5,000 sneakers.
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SPEAKER_00
Dude, the books thing is still the funniest shit in the world.
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Bro, he doubled down and then some.
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Respect doubling down on a crazy shit is fucking hilarious.
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He was saying I went to the library And I got 20 books at a time because that s all they would let you get and I would be there three times a week what oftentimes I d be reading eight books simultaneously because I have the original book and then I have books and annotated and I love it
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The idea that a librarian sees him coming and gets nervous.
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They re like, no, no, no, no, no, no.
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Lock the doors.
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SPEAKER_00
Here he comes.
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Only 20.
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SPEAKER_00
Only 20.
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Only 20 books at a time.
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I need to read 30 books today.
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What was he saying?
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A week?
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How many?
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I don t give a fuck what he said.
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He s a gem.
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SPEAKER_01
That guy s a gem.
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SPEAKER_01
I love him.
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I was so happy that I got him to come on the podcast because he was like, Joe Rogan don t want me on this podcast.
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SPEAKER_01
I m like, I do though.
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SPEAKER_01
I fucking love that guy.
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SPEAKER_01
I ve always sung his praises.
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SPEAKER_00
When you heard him say that, did you talk back to the interviewer?
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SPEAKER_00
Like, but I do want you on.
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SPEAKER_01
No, no, I immediately went on Twitter.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
I immediately went on Twitter and I said, dude, I love that guy.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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Let s go.
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I just have never met him.
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I never met him until yesterday.
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SPEAKER_00
I ve never met him.
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So it s just like we passed each other in the night at the store I just never was there when he was there and he was already a big, you know giant theater act by then Yeah, and now he s an arena act, you know, like he s just I just never met him That s all it was like it s hard to meet arena acts like unless it s Chappelle who still goes to the clubs Yeah, like I asked him to do the club.
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I go you want to do do a spot the club something goes I m an arena act
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Just to clarify who someone like that is.
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I do arenas, too.
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It s okay.
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The club s amazing.
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Can t.
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Not enough people.
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No, I think he genuinely doesn t enjoy being in tight crowds like that.
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I think he s uncomfortable.
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And I told him, I go, you got too famous.
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And he was like, looking like that, he got too famous.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, he s been doing arenas for over 10 years now, probably.
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At least, yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
And then theaters the whole time.
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SPEAKER_00
Well, Pimp Chronicles was when?
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SPEAKER_00
When was Pimp Chronicles?
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SPEAKER_00
I m going to guess, I mean, I know Jamie s going to look it up, I m going to guess 02.
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Oh three somewhere around then I watched that in the gym yesterday before I came to do one of the greatest stand-up specials of all time It s fucking amazing.
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Yeah the the amount of It s great.
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It s like up there with like the energy of Chris Rock bring the pain where there s like it s like yell laugh But it s his own flavor best dude.
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Oh
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It s his own flavor of comedy like his his flavor of comedy is uniquely cat williams Like the way he can repeat things and they become funnier who fucking repeats a line and it becomes funnier He does get the bit gets better I was saying even his 2019 special was so funny that I sat through 16 minutes of jacksonville jokes Acting like I knew that about jacksonville like i m like oh those bridges
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I forget who Chris Rock was watching it with but they were they were going crazy just because he was just talking about Florida for 16 minutes And by the way, by the way, you re laughing with him at the whole time Yeah, he doesn t lose you and then the special just gets better and better.
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He was doing sex robot bits on that Yeah, he s a monster
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Think he is top ten of all time and people don t even I think he gets overlooked a lot for a guy That s been doing arena.
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Why is that a lot of?
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SPEAKER_01
Controversies and craziness yeah, but that s what you get when you get a brilliant mind you get a fucking Ferrari engine on a kid s bike Yeah, and sometimes it goes off the rails.
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Oh absolutely It s almost like Howard Hughes shit where you re like you re either gonna be wearing a box boxes of Kleenexes shoes or wrestling a seventh grader, and it s gonna be
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SPEAKER_00
Because that shit, if you had enough money, you d be like, nuke the internet.
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SPEAKER_00
I want that off.
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SPEAKER_01
Bro, when you see the Howard Hughes type characters, you see those guys just get completely isolated and they can t interact with people.
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That is terrifying.
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But I see it.
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I get how it happens.
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I see how it could happen.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, a lot of money.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, a lot of money.
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SPEAKER_00
And you become defensive, like crazy defensive and paranoid.
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The paranoia is the thing that makes you just go like, no, I m just going to grow my beard and my fingernails and not leave outside.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, you stop.
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You have to stop and think about the time that Howard Hughes lived in.
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OK.
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And how easy it was to kill somebody.
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There was no fucking video cameras everywhere.
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There was no cell phone cameras.
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There was no DNA evidence and everyone was corrupt.
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SPEAKER_00
It wasn t a thing where after 12 hours you re like, let s get eyes on it.
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SPEAKER_00
It would be a couple of days and people would be like, you just didn t show up for work.
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For sure they d want to kill you.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, you re the billionaire guy who s controlling the schools You re making weird decisions about the drinking water Rockefeller.
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Yeah, you gotta be you but you better be concerned.
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Yeah, you better have people around you Well, that s where you got to worry about Who are you insulating yourself with because if you re like a billionaire like that and you ve got crazy motherfuckers in your ears Yeah, that s how you get like last time.
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I was here.
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We were talking about Saddam Hussein s kids, right?
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That s the kind of similar shit.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh
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You just get like crazy people around you, some Machiavellian shit, and you re like, yeah, burn the town.
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SPEAKER_01
It s always the evil son of the king, right?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Mafia kids.
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SPEAKER_00
Mafia kids are always not as good at mafying as their dad.
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SPEAKER_01
They re kind of dangerous because they didn t earn it, right?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
They just got that power, so they ve never had to work for it, which is really weird.
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SPEAKER_00
Which also leaves a hole.
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SPEAKER_01
I think it leaves like a- They have to prove themselves more too.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, whereas if you make your money yourself, there s always this like gaining momentum where you re like what I m doing, right?
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SPEAKER_01
You all you know, you didn t just hit the lottery.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, you kind of hit the lottery at many steps along the way lucky for sure.
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There was a lot of work involved in getting to where you are.
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So you know your progression and what you put in to get to that progression.
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But if you just are born the son of a king,
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SPEAKER_00
That s where you have a dragon.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you re just like let s torture.
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SPEAKER_00
What s torture about dogs?
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SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah, you re probably not to like empathize with these guys, but you re probably trying to feel something You re probably like everything is all the great shit that I have does nothing to me, right?
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SPEAKER_00
That would change someone s life, right?
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So now what do I got a dude?
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Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah Then they re like the milk of magnesia and I
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Just putting hot hot flames on people and shit.
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When did they figure out cocaine?
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Who was the first to figure out cocaine a?
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brave person a brave person that knew a little bit about science because it ain t like weed where you can just pull it off and Put fire to it cocaine and alcohol takes someone so dedicated to getting fucked up that they become good at science and
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I watched, have you ever seen that show Trafficked?
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SPEAKER_01
No.
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There s this woman who s like one of my personal heroes, Mariana Van Zeller.
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She s like a real on the ground journalist.
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Okay.
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Goes to dangerous places.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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The kind that, the people that need to do ayahuasca to stop the PTSD.
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I don t know what, she seems fine, which is crazy.
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SPEAKER_00
All those war correspondents are all like, you re like, you need to probably go do something to erase everything you ve seen.
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she was first on the show like 10 years ago because she exposed the fentanyl issue and the Excuse me the opioid issue in Florida where they had those pill mills and they didn t have a database Yeah, so you could go to they call them pain management centers.
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You would go there You would talk to the doctor on the left side the doctors say oh you need pills and you go to the right side and they give you pills and that s all they have is pills and then people would go to multiple ones Stockpile get a big bag of them go to different doctors.
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You can go many doctors
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Yeah, oh yeah, they call that uh what do they call it doctor shopping or like going around and like there There s a word for it where they go doctor to doctor Yeah, you can you could at you back, then you could do it cuz they didn t have a database Oh, they ll that everybody thought was insane.
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This is a controlled substance a highly addictive heroin.
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They take in pill form and you know Did you come by today?
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No, we can t she did a whole documentary on it called the Oxycontin Express.
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That s right
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Amazing.
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I m gonna absolutely check that out.
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But she went to the fucking jungle of Colombia to where they make cocaine and filmed the whole process with the people making it and then hiked out with them when they carried it on their backpacks through the jungle.
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SPEAKER_00
Who does she talk to to set that up to also feel comfortable?
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You re like at any moment.
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I m in the jungle in Colombia right fucking dead not only nice got my little recorder, and I goes so do you like cocaine and they re like what?
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You can expose to your enemies
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SPEAKER_01
roughly where this is.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
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Roughly.
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SPEAKER_01
You re going to give away some information that can be used against you.
1
SPEAKER_01
I ll find those guys who are on that video.
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SPEAKER_01
I don t need ... They have a mask on?
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SPEAKER_01
I know who that is.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s Pedro.
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SPEAKER_01
I know Pedro.
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SPEAKER_01
If you had a fucking mask on and you were talking, I d be like, that s Dan Soder.
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You d have to do it- Did you guys like Macho Man?
1
SPEAKER_01
You d have to do it in all Cat Williams, while you re working on cocaine.
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I ain t givin  away this cocaine, ain t no one touchin  it, Pimpin .
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SPEAKER_01
Just the entire time you work in the coke factory, you talk exactly the same.
1
SPEAKER_00
Different voices, or just, I change my voices so no one knows who I am.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m like, I m tellin  ya, this cocaine is unbelievable.
1
SPEAKER_00
And they re like, Dangerfield s back?
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SPEAKER_00
Do it coke when I was a I was a busboy at this steakhouse in Aurora growing up when I was in high school And we d smoke cigarettes in the room that wasn t being used when you could smoke in restaurants And there was this old waiter, and he was a former Marine, and he was like I
1
SPEAKER_00
Old-school like I don t want to talk about it old-school Like did some shit and then one time after work me and my buddy Mike were sitting there And we were smoking he d smoke cool unfiltered well And this guy was just telling us stories about he was a sniper in the army and his job in Central America Was to kill donkeys that were carrying drugs north whoa, and he s like because we d always ask him like you kill people He s like no.
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SPEAKER_00
I just shot a shit ton of talkies.
1
I
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SPEAKER_00
Because all these donkeys we just have all this weight on them And then then you just pop them in the middle of the jungle and he d be like well now you ve got you know And then it would set up like okay now go get him But this dude just like him telling us that and us being 16 and wanting it to be people like no, but you kill people He s like no you re not listening to what I did.
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SPEAKER_00
I fucked their shit up.
1
SPEAKER_01
What a really dumb way to handle a problem
1
SPEAKER_01
Here s the problem.
1
SPEAKER_01
Some people think you shouldn t do cocaine.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, so we re gonna lock everybody up who sells it So the only people that are gonna sell it are the people they can get away with selling it in Mexico Yeah, and those people are going to be a super billionaire Powerful cartel like an army industry an army a well-funded army.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and they re they can walk here Yeah
1
SPEAKER_01
And that s because you don t want people over here to sell coke, even though people want to buy coke.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, let it rip.
1
SPEAKER_01
I kind of feel like that s the only real answer.
1
SPEAKER_01
Don t do it.
1
SPEAKER_01
Don t do it.
1
SPEAKER_01
But if it was sold in America, it would be actual coke.
1
SPEAKER_01
Is it that hard to sell pure coke?
1
SPEAKER_00
I bet it would.
1
SPEAKER_00
I bet it would make a lot of people s lives better and a lot of people s lives worse.
1
SPEAKER_01
It would go like this.
1
SPEAKER_01
Richard Pryor got just regular coke and it ruined him.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean some say Hunter S. Thompson.
1
SPEAKER_00
Some say Hunter S. Thompson s writing.
1
SPEAKER_01
Sigmund Freud loved cocaine.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean all the way cocaine made him feel fucking duh also when he s into psychology Yeah, I bet there were some Freud talks that you re like dude I don t want to do this, and he s like no think about it.
1
SPEAKER_00
You want to fuck your mom He goes dude Simon.
1
SPEAKER_01
We re on a lot of blow right like dude It s like 80s coke movies where you know they were writing and making it when they were doing coke oh
1
SPEAKER_01
There s some of those movies, like, what are you saying?
1
SPEAKER_00
Probably not, maybe, but Electric 2, Electric Boogaloo, Breaking 2, Electric Boogaloo, I watched that in my hotel room the other day, and I was like, this was written on cocaine.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because every scene just goes like, and then they re here, and then they re here, and then they re here, and everything s all right.
1
SPEAKER_00
My number one speculation is Showgirls.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, Showgirls was written with a half-erect penis.
1
SPEAKER_00
That movie was written by a guy that s like, and then boobs come out.
1
SPEAKER_00
That movie hit when I was in middle school, like right when jerking off started, and so it was a goldmine because you could be like, it s a legitimate movie.
1
SPEAKER_00
It wasn t porn.
1
SPEAKER_01
Right, but she s topless.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, dude, the sex scene in the pool is the dumbest shit where she goes like,
1
SPEAKER_01
Possessed it doesn t make any sense that anybody would would be like not lose their boner and go oh my god She s insane having sex with insane person so that would hurt having sex like that you d be like calm down It was only NC 17 the first and to date only NC 17 film to be given a wide release mainstream theaters I m telling
1
SPEAKER_01
It was so dumb.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s one of the dumbest movies ever.
1
SPEAKER_00
It was so stupid.
1
SPEAKER_01
But it s great.
1
SPEAKER_01
But it s great to watch.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s great jerk off.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s Hall of Fame.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s just great to watch because it s so goofy.
1
SPEAKER_01
If you re with a bunch of buddies and you get high and watch Showgirls, you re going to laugh.
1
SPEAKER_01
You re going to laugh really.
1
SPEAKER_01
Hinchcliffe, Gillis, Showgirls.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
We re having fun.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, all the dialogue, the choppy dialogue, it made Cinemax movies look better.
1
SPEAKER_00
We were like, man, we were really making fun of Shane and Tweed and all those Cinemax movies.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then you re like, actually much better than this.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s better than Showgirls.
1
SPEAKER_00
But Showgirls, the show- It s just a wild movie.
1
SPEAKER_00
They were like, Jesse Spano gets naked.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I m telling you, it timed out perfectly with me.
1
SPEAKER_00
I was young enough to watch Saved by the Bell and take it seriously, that by the time puberty hit and Showgirls happened, you re like,
1
SPEAKER_00
I was waiting for something like this.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
1
SPEAKER_00
I think kids now get it too quick.
1
SPEAKER_00
Way too quick.
1
SPEAKER_00
The sexualizing of everything happens.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, boys are seeing porn the moment they get a phone.
1
SPEAKER_01
the moment they get a phone.
1
SPEAKER_00
Why wouldn t you?
1
SPEAKER_01
You can t stop them.
1
SPEAKER_01
They re too smart.
1
SPEAKER_01
My youngest, my middle daughter rather, she figured out how to, my wife put a password on her phone.
1
SPEAKER_01
And so she could limit the use.
1
SPEAKER_01
She figured to record the screen and give my wife the phone.
1
SPEAKER_01
So my wife punches in the numbers, it s recording the screen.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s like velociraptors learning how to open doors.
1
SPEAKER_00
What the fuck?
1
SPEAKER_00
She was 12.
1
SPEAKER_00
That is, they know so fast.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s so creepy.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like you little raptor.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like imagine thinking that, go, here mom, here mom, here s my phone.
1
SPEAKER_00
Can you put it in?
1
SPEAKER_01
I really agree with you that limitations are important.
1
SPEAKER_01
I want to see the puppies.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then she s like, boop, boop, boop.
1
SPEAKER_01
And you look at her screen time and it s four hours of TikTok.
1
SPEAKER_00
She goes around the corner and she looks and she s like, we got her.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, they re little drug dealers.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s what the phone companies are.
1
SPEAKER_00
Little drug dealers for kids.
1
SPEAKER_00
Dopamine.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, we do it, too.
1
SPEAKER_01
And the kids are little junkies, and we re junkies, too.
1
SPEAKER_00
But I think it s one of those things where you re like, what s going to be their response to it?
1
SPEAKER_00
Because they re smart.
1
SPEAKER_00
They can do shit like that.
1
SPEAKER_00
When they get older, are they going to be like, hey, we should limit this?
1
SPEAKER_01
No.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, it s not going to be limited.
1
SPEAKER_01
We re in it now.
1
SPEAKER_01
We re in it now, and this is us.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I think it s just gonna get more and more invasive, because that seems the direction that it keeps going.
1
SPEAKER_01
If I had to guess, and then this is obviously just a guess, I don t know what the fuck I m talking about, but I feel like this can t be stopped, especially with AI.
1
SPEAKER_01
When they re talking about AI and all the things that AI can do for you now, it s just people are getting papers written, they re getting busted all the time.
1
SPEAKER_01
ChatGBT is writing them.
1
SPEAKER_01
Any answer to kind of anything it can code websites Instantaneously it can do your voice can replicate your voice the Google one can t show white people though Really, which is a real issue.
1
SPEAKER_01
No really you didn t know this.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, dude.
1
SPEAKER_01
Are you ready for this?
1
SPEAKER_01
They asked the Google one
1
SPEAKER_01
to show images of World War II Nazi soldiers.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
And they made it all woke.
1
SPEAKER_01
So they made like a Native American Nazi.
1
SPEAKER_01
They have an Asian lady Nazi.
1
SPEAKER_01
They have a black man Nazi.
1
SPEAKER_00
You are describing the perfect punk album cover from the 80s.
1
SPEAKER_01
Bro, they, it couldn t describe the founding fathers of the United States.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, they were just, they were men, but were they?
1
SPEAKER_00
Did they identify as men?
1
SPEAKER_01
Do you have to see some of these pictures?
1
SPEAKER_01
Can you got any, Jamie?
1
SPEAKER_00
I was seeing it on Twitter.
1
SPEAKER_00
Here s my question to you, and this is the perfect place to ask this question about cell phones.
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you think there s any chance that cell phones are weapons from aliens that disarm us?
1
SPEAKER_00
Because we re all looking down and they know it can use our emotions.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like a grenade that takes a long time to explode.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because we each have them.
1
SPEAKER_00
Cuz I love alien shit, and you re like well.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s there s got to be some alien technology if they re watching us They just drop something like hey you guys want to watch them get fucked up.
1
SPEAKER_00
Let s give them cell phones
1
SPEAKER_01
Look at that.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s great.
1
SPEAKER_01
Founding fathers of America.
1
SPEAKER_01
This summer, George Washington.
1
SPEAKER_01
I like how one of them is a Native American.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s like saying a Holocaust victim is- Who s a Nazi.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s so crazy to say that s one of the founding fathers of the United States.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, that s who we stole the land from.
1
SPEAKER_00
This was theirs.
1
SPEAKER_01
What the fuck are you talking about?
1
SPEAKER_01
Look at the images of Vikings.
1
SPEAKER_00
Dude, that s great.
2
SPEAKER_02
Samoan dude and a black lady.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, look at the Pope s an Indian woman and an African man Google Gemini, that s so funny.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s like I don t want to say it.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s not good Yes, you are messing with the fiber of reality to fit in with your ideology And you shouldn t be doing that if you re in control of artificial intelligence it s supposed to be an artificially intelligent program that takes all the information the world and
2
SPEAKER_02
Gives you a take on things right.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s not supposed to be an indoctrination tool.
2
SPEAKER_03
You can t use it to say no no Opinions it should be a regurgitation not an opinion fucking lie about who the founding fathers were man But imagine if you could use AI to make it yourself look awesome
2
SPEAKER_03
If you re just like any AI Dan Soder stuff, you re like seven foot tall could dunk easy Run up and down the court show me the one where they showed the Nazi soldiers because the Nazi soldiers ones the most preposterous Like the darkest African looking man you ve ever seen was the top left the other there attempted a white guy And they re just like yeah, we can t even do it
2
SPEAKER_02
I think the top left is a white guy, so they gave you one white guy when it came to German soldier, but then you got an Asian lady.
2
SPEAKER_02
You got an Asian lady Nazi?
2
SPEAKER_02
What?
2
SPEAKER_02
What the fuck are you saying?
2
SPEAKER_02
What the fuck did you just say?
2
SPEAKER_02
Do you know what a Nazi is?
2
SPEAKER_02
How are you so dumb and yet so smart?
2
SPEAKER_02
That is the dumbest thing I ve ever seen in my fucking life.
2
SPEAKER_03
We re going to need to hope that robots stay that way when they turn on us, that there s still some stupidity in them so we can win.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s this weird white thing that they have a problem with white people.
2
SPEAKER_03
It s so bonkers.
2
SPEAKER_03
You also just don t know the programming.
2
SPEAKER_03
People can program this.
2
SPEAKER_03
At what point does AI get away from people?
2
SPEAKER_02
At what point does AI, because you remember that thing where they had- I want you to imagine a world where it was the opposite.
2
SPEAKER_02
I want you to imagine a world where you said, show me Muhammad Ali, and it shows you this white guy.
2
SPEAKER_03
Didn t they do that with rock and roll?
2
SPEAKER_03
Where they re like, hey, black music, but it s a white guy.
2
SPEAKER_02
Well, for sure, that was the criticism of Elvis.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that he stole.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_03
Rock and roll.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like, Ray Charles never liked Elvis.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like, Ray Charles would talk shit about Elvis.
2
SPEAKER_02
Really?
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
You ever see Ray Charles talking shit on Elvis?
2
SPEAKER_02
I want to see that immediately.
2
SPEAKER_02
You got to see it.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s amazing.
2
SPEAKER_02
With his sunglasses on, talking shit.
2
SPEAKER_03
But it would be for effect if he took them off and looked at the camera.
2
SPEAKER_03
He s like, look at me.
2
SPEAKER_02
He s got the blind eyes.
2
SPEAKER_02
Fuck Elvis Presley.
2
SPEAKER_03
Look into my gray eyes.
2
SPEAKER_03
Like an oracle.
2
SPEAKER_03
I m going to touch you.
2
SPEAKER_02
He grabs your wrist and takes it.
2
SPEAKER_01
Ah, okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
Not necessarily.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know better than I. Let me ask you differently.
2
SPEAKER_01
How good was Elvis?
2
SPEAKER_01
What Elvis did, he caused a lot of the populace, if you want to use it.
2
SPEAKER_01
When people say populace, they usually mean white people.
2
SPEAKER_01
uh to start listening to a lot of music that normally they wouldn t have been listening to and black people been going out shaking their behind for centuries what the hell s unusual about that shaking hips and stuff and that s all Elvis was doing was copying that and he was doing our kind of music
2
SPEAKER_01
So what the hell am I supposed to get so excited about, man?
2
SPEAKER_01
He s the king, and he s the... I... He s a punk.
2
SPEAKER_03
Sorry.
2
SPEAKER_01
He s a punk.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know about Elvis, because I ve gotten in enough trouble as it is.
2
SPEAKER_03
I think he could... He s called Elvis a punk.
2
SPEAKER_03
Everybody in entertainment has that, where they go like, yeah, he did this, but also, fucking, let s stop sucking his dick.
2
SPEAKER_03
Anyone in entertainment has that exact muscle, that response muscle of like, so he s the king?
2
SPEAKER_03
It might be off-microphone, but everyone Cat Williams is off.
2
SPEAKER_02
Right, but in his case, this is a totally different time in history.
2
SPEAKER_02
You gotta think of that was like, if you were a really good black artist, you actually couldn t get on TV.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
It wasn t like today, where these black artists are hugely successful.
2
SPEAKER_03
They re like, no, it s not happening.
2
SPEAKER_02
Back then, you were not going to make it.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
And they were gonna really promote this white guy.
2
SPEAKER_03
Oh, yeah, a white guy walking up.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bro, I m getting the shit out of this white guy.
2
SPEAKER_02
Girls would scream and cry, like, this is what we ve been looking for.
2
SPEAKER_03
That reaction, can I just say, that reaction always has been like, there s no way I could handle that.
2
SPEAKER_03
Someone scream crying the second they saw you?
2
SPEAKER_02
Well, he couldn t handle it either.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
Look what happened to him.
2
SPEAKER_03
He went crazy.
2
SPEAKER_03
Well, the Vegas.
2
SPEAKER_03
Living in Vegas full time and just doing fucking pain pills.
2
SPEAKER_02
That s like living right next to Sauron s dick.
2
SPEAKER_03
And you re doing all kinds of drugs, but by the way peanut butter and banana sandwiches Fried they re good.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah Yeah peanut butter and bacon with honey
2
SPEAKER_03
I ve been doing, I ve been running back peanut butter and honey recently.
2
SPEAKER_02
Is it true Elvis died on the toilet?
2
SPEAKER_02
That s what they say, but that s just a rude thing that I would say too if I was like, he s a punk, he died on the toilet.
2
SPEAKER_02
That was the end of it, they cut off.
2
SPEAKER_02
I heard he died on the toilet.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then he just gets around like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
Elvis is probably still alive when he said that.
2
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_02
Actually, probably not.
2
SPEAKER_03
That s Bob Costa.
2
SPEAKER_03
Do you think Elvis did the fake death?
2
SPEAKER_02
No, he s dead as fuck.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he s dead as fuck.
2
SPEAKER_02
He can t do pills forever.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_03
But what a way at the end.
2
SPEAKER_03
I mean, there s a moment there where you were flying high, and then you gotta be like, well, you either gotta wrap it up or just be like, let s just play it out.
2
SPEAKER_02
There s so many of his concerts where he s got pill sweat.
2
SPEAKER_03
Oh, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like, just pill sweat all over his face.
2
SPEAKER_02
Dumping.
2
SPEAKER_02
Pill sweat.
2
SPEAKER_02
Just dumping sweat.
2
SPEAKER_02
Elvis Presley autopsy explains grotesque illness that caused him to die on toilet.
2
SPEAKER_02
He was 43?
2
SPEAKER_00
He had constipation because of everything.
2
SPEAKER_00
They said he had a four month old stool.
2
SPEAKER_00
No way.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s what tells me.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s what this says.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, but doesn t, isn t that one of the things that happens when people take like Vicodins?
2
SPEAKER_02
Opiates they usually have a hard time shitting on yeah here due to his high fat unhealthy diet What about the pills that you know?
2
SPEAKER_02
suffered from chronic constipation And why are they doctors due to his high fat unhealthy diet?
2
SPEAKER_02
What about due to his pills?
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I know, but that should be at the top like that s probably why he was constipated for fucking months the unhealthy diet people shit like racehorses I was a shit everywhere
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, yeah, he must have been the amount of pills he was on that was stopping the shit And then making it damn in him for four months so the rock singer anyway I went off on a tangent suffered from chronic constipation and a post-mortem examination found a four-month-old Compacted stool sitting in his bowel.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh my god.
2
SPEAKER_02
We talked about what came out but imagine how much that dude was eating at four months worth of food and
2
SPEAKER_03
and banana peanut butter sandwiches.
2
SPEAKER_03
Oh, he didn t shit for four months?
2
SPEAKER_03
He just packed it in.
2
SPEAKER_03
How could you not shit for four months?
2
SPEAKER_03
Because my initial thought is- Ari would do that, I think.
2
SPEAKER_03
This is just as a challenge.
2
SPEAKER_00
No way.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, I have to ask him sometimes.
2
SPEAKER_00
No way.
2
SPEAKER_00
Not four months, but weeks.
2
SPEAKER_03
What?
2
SPEAKER_03
Ari would go weeks?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve heard this story.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s gross.
2
SPEAKER_03
I got constipated two years ago, and it was one of the most terrified I ve ever been in my life.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s scary.
2
SPEAKER_03
For two weeks, I couldn t- two and a half weeks, I couldn t shit.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh, my God.
2
SPEAKER_02
And you re still eating?
2
SPEAKER_03
But you re also like you have to poop you let go and you have to poop, but it just doesn t Show up.
2
SPEAKER_03
I m just dude.
2
SPEAKER_02
It was after I got a Friend who had to go to the doctor to get it pulled out.
2
SPEAKER_02
Oh Yeah, my friend Larry shout out to Larry.
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I used to work with him on fear factor
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, and he had to get poop pulled out of his butt.
2
SPEAKER_02
The story, every time he would tell the story, I literally couldn t breathe.
2
SPEAKER_02
I was laughing so hard I couldn t fucking breathe, because he s funny anyway, and he s telling the story.
2
SPEAKER_02
And when it got to the point where it was hard, so they had to go in there and break it up and pull it out.
2
SPEAKER_02
They had to use tools.
2
SPEAKER_02
They had to just chip away at the cement shit that was stuck at the fucking base of his butt.
2
SPEAKER_03
Butthole do there was a moment where I I was at I was in Rochester working a weekend comedy at the Carlson Grey Club Didn t shit all weekend Saturday.
2
SPEAKER_03
I was like emotionally going through it, and I had suppositories, and I was like do a suppository cuz it I was like just do it and
2
SPEAKER_03
Just do it, and it didn t work.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I was like, it was one of those moments where you go, why have you forsaken me, God?
2
SPEAKER_03
I was like, dude, nothing, nothing.
2
SPEAKER_03
And then after the weekend, I went back to New York, and my doctor was like, just drink Miralax.
2
SPEAKER_03
Just keep drinking Miralax.
2
SPEAKER_03
Like, fuck what it says.
2
SPEAKER_03
Every time you think about it, have a cup of Miralax.
2
SPEAKER_03
And so I was just a ticking time bomb.
2
SPEAKER_03
I was a ticking time bomb.
2
SPEAKER_02
And you went on stage like that?
2
SPEAKER_03
I had to and I was like I was like I had to go and so I get through the weekend fine I get to the weekend, but the second I got back to New York the next morning I woke up and was like fucking around in my apartment and all the adrenaline had dumped from like the past two weeks I Sat down and took the most glorious shit.
2
SPEAKER_03
I took like a Jeff Jeff Daniels dumb and dumber my
3
SPEAKER_00
My legs were fucking, it was unbelievable.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was almost worth the constipation for that dump.
3
SPEAKER_01
Why is it so satisfying to look at a giant shit?
3
SPEAKER_00
Dude, it just dropping out of you, you re like, whoa!
3
SPEAKER_00
But when it s really big, you get excited about it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, when it snakes out, I have to stop myself to yell to my fiance.
3
SPEAKER_00
Because I like there s times where I m like someone s got to see this.
3
SPEAKER_00
Ari would send me pictures Oh, yeah, I mean Ari will box up his poop like he did when he gave Big J a box of poop on skates He said it was an Avenged Sevenfold album And he fucking shit in a box and gave it to fucking J They opened it in front of a crowd!
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god And everybody was like ugh It cleared the room
3
SPEAKER_00
It was at the old creek in the Queens, downstairs.
3
SPEAKER_00
It cleared the entire fucking room.
3
SPEAKER_00
Everyone s like, that smells horrible.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s the best.
3
SPEAKER_00
Ari is one of those people where you re like, and now he s, did you see he went viral with that sweet story about what he did for his girlfriend?
3
SPEAKER_01
I did see that.
3
SPEAKER_01
I didn t read it though.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s just, you know, we both know Ari the person.
3
SPEAKER_00
We both know the very good side, a sweet man.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s a mensch.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s one of my favorite people.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love him to death.
3
SPEAKER_00
He is truly a mensch.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s a great guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
He united New York and LA comedy.
3
SPEAKER_01
He did.
3
SPEAKER_00
Single-handedly.
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, he went over there with the attitude that we all had at the store.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he s like you guys should just meet these guys.
3
SPEAKER_00
You would like everybody Yeah, big J was the first person that he was like close with and then through big J and Ari The healing started where we started hanging out going to LA and everyone like became friends the New York versus LA comedy like
3
SPEAKER_00
Feud was the dumbest thing of all time it is zero set you are literally giving power to all the industry Separating like that.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s so it would not only was it so dumb, but it never made any sense because most of us started on the east coast Like Stan hopes from Worcester
3
SPEAKER_01
So many guys started in New York and then came to LA.
3
SPEAKER_01
Burr.
3
SPEAKER_00
I moved to New York in 07, right when Burr left.
3
SPEAKER_00
And so it felt like ridiculous that people were like, LA comics, you re like, yeah, but Burr just, Burr s the, like we knew, like people that were there.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was always, it was ridiculous.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was stupid.
3
SPEAKER_01
But it was a dumb thing, like we just weren t communicating.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you re like, fuck those guys.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like the walled garden feel.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like you d come to the store and there d be all the cliques and you didn t know who to hang out with, you know.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s all high school.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s always high school.
3
SPEAKER_00
High school just keeps repeating itself throughout your life.
3
SPEAKER_01
But you can have a cool group of friends in high school.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, and that s what I try to cultivate.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, just people you want to hang with.
3
SPEAKER_01
Cool group of friends.
3
SPEAKER_01
I figured out a long time ago on the road, and I was trying to explain this to Feim, it s better to make less money on the road and then pay a guy who s good to open for you.
3
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely.
3
SPEAKER_01
And pay for his airfare and his hotel.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you ll make less money, but you ll have more fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
You have to have more fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
Fun is the whole thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ll add to that.
3
SPEAKER_00
I like bringing my friends who I like to watch because then I get to watch a show.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
I watch them in the middle and I go like, this is so fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
And you get to go on laughing.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re already laughing.
3
SPEAKER_00
Dan St.
3
SPEAKER_00
Germain s one of my best friends, and he s a hilarious comic, and I bring him on the road, and he just does little stuff that I m just like, dude, that s so fucking funny.
3
SPEAKER_00
He ll get off stage, and I ll be like, that line is so funny.
3
SPEAKER_00
And he ll be like, oh, thanks.
3
SPEAKER_00
When we filmed, because I put out my special on YouTube Friday, March 1st,
3
SPEAKER_00
When we filmed that I brought him because I was like let s just keep this like a weekend We re just gonna film this like this is because it was I was just on the road Yeah, and I was like let s just film a show at a club that I love Portland Helium We ll just film it like it always is and I get to bring my friend, and then it s just like a hang yeah It s like a fun hang that doesn t feel because you know when you do special tapings they can feel like Everyone s like are you gonna do it?
3
SPEAKER_00
Right is it gonna be and you re like and you got like your managers there Randomly yes, and it just doesn t feel like a show right filming it at Portland Helium with st Germain and having like people around and just friends come through that s just a show it was like oh, and then I m like I m just gonna put this up on YouTube for free and this is great And this is exactly what I do on the road.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it was like a fun fucking hang
3
SPEAKER_01
And I think the club shows represent like a more intimate thing which is what you re doing at home anyway if you re sitting in your living room.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think there s a disconnect like if you watch like I ve seen some guys do arena specials.
3
SPEAKER_01
Which is nuts because.
3
SPEAKER_01
Which is nuts.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s still great.
3
SPEAKER_01
Listen arena shows are.
3
SPEAKER_00
It can be great.
3
SPEAKER_00
Arena shows are fun.
3
SPEAKER_00
Dude I went and saw Nate at fucking State Farm in Atlanta.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m not saying arena shows aren t fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
I love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Here s the point I m making is I went and saw Nate and live.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was an experience.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was like watching one man in front of all those people just murder my friend.
3
SPEAKER_00
Just be like, buddy, my wife.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it s just like sending out waves.
3
SPEAKER_01
But at home, like minimal, minimal exertion, but maximal reward with the punch lines.
3
SPEAKER_00
If we were in the 40s, he would have been a Hall of Fame sniper in the Army, which is how calm he would have been, and he would have been like, seven degrees left.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s a great description of him.
3
SPEAKER_00
Nate would be like, seven degrees right.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ve never seen someone more calmly kill.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s incredible.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s incredible by the way the way he kills he his bits are stuff that it s so organic and from who he is Yeah, that like you re like I ve had multiple phone conversations with Nate multiple over the years where we have talked about something and then months later
3
SPEAKER_00
That conversation is a seven minute bit, and it s just destroying the room.
3
SPEAKER_00
We had, because we all used to hang in New York, like around 07, 08 at Stand Up New York, when Patrice, Patrice s manager, Wayne Rada, was booking it.
3
SPEAKER_00
So it was like Patrice was there, Attell, Big Jay, and then Nate.
3
SPEAKER_00
All these guys that I met, specifically Luis J. Gomez and all them, are all from this time period.
3
SPEAKER_00
So you would have,
3
SPEAKER_00
Weird hangs like me Lewis and Nate Nate had a bit that he did on Conan about his friend trying to fight staff members at a McDonald s Because he took a bite out of his burger That was Nate Lewis and I because we took a bite out of Lewis s hamburger and wrap it back up and this psycho came back in it was like Oh, what s up?
3
SPEAKER_00
It s very walking
3
SPEAKER_00
at the McDonald s workers.
3
SPEAKER_00
And Nate and I were like, no, no, no, no, no.
3
SPEAKER_00
Dude, Nate was laughing so hard he had to bail out of the McDonald s.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I had to get in front of Lewis and be like, it was us, it was us.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then six months later, Nate s on Conan murdering with a bit about it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Dude, I bought a cheeseburger once from Burger King and it had a bite taken out of it.
3
SPEAKER_00
That is an act of war.
3
SPEAKER_00
If it s not your friend, it s an act of war.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was driving home from training, and I got the cheeseburger.
3
SPEAKER_01
What a bad guy to pick.
3
SPEAKER_01
A guy coming home from training.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was so sad.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I mean, you have to throw it away.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was so hungry, I ate it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Did you bite around it?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I was so poor.
3
SPEAKER_01
I needed the food.
3
SPEAKER_00
When I was a waiter, that s what I would do when someone ... I worked in Midtown, and they would throw out this steak.
3
SPEAKER_00
We had a steak, and it was in little slices all the way down, and I would see how much they would eat, and then I would just go on over and be like, and that s mine.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I just put that in a dish, and I d be like, and I got some steak.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s always the way to do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
When you re that poor, you re like, I ll eat around it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I just ate it.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was so hungry, and I was so sad.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it is a bummer.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I didn t know what to do.
3
SPEAKER_01
I didn t know, should I go and tell them someone took a bite out of my burger?
3
SPEAKER_01
I have to get home.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m tired.
3
SPEAKER_01
Was that- I just ate it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Because I m saying, they picked the wrong guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
You pick me, who just smoked a bowl, and I ll be like- What am I gonna do, go in and karate kick people?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, I wasn t that type of guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Dude, you could be like Shownuf in The Last Dragon and go fuck up.
3
SPEAKER_01
Who ate my motherfucking cheeseburger?
3
SPEAKER_01
When I say who ate my burger.
3
SPEAKER_01
You could pick the wrong guy to do that to though.
3
SPEAKER_01
You could pick a guy who just found out that his wife s been fucking his best friend and she stole $100,000 from his bank account and his boss just fired him and then he is in a fucking rage.
3
SPEAKER_01
That he gets a cheeseburger, and it s got a bite taken out of it, and it s like oh Okay, motherfucker, and then you pull in with that cheeseburger and just start laying people out Yeah, you re just driving out there.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re describing.
3
SPEAKER_00
What s gonna happen to all these YouTube pranksters Some of our bringing big giant security guards with them well That s their thing now because there was a story about a guy one of these pranksters that got shot he got shot in the stomach Oh, I saw that and then the article came
3
SPEAKER_00
An article came out with interview with his dad shot in the stomach by an illegal immigrant by the way
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but still a prank So quick to pull guns, I mean, where s he from fuck around?
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean he ran from something.
3
SPEAKER_00
You know that that guy ran from something more dangerous than him.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, maybe jail I mean, yeah, there s like some jail some of some of these people you re like, dude, you don t want to fuck It s again the wrong guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
You picked the wrong guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you beat the wrong guy pick the wrong guy by Fucking pull his pants down just shot him in the gut
3
SPEAKER_00
Dude, there were there were old pranks people used because this is coming waves.
3
SPEAKER_00
There was a like in the vine days People were doing pranks.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes, and they were deep answering like black dudes just walking up in deep answering black
4
SPEAKER_02
guys like in the hood and being like no no no and the second they would like get swarmed on they d like it s a prank and there s one where a guy does it and you hear that gun hit the street and that pranksters like and the guy like picks up the gun and you re like dude when did you you could have been dead you could have been dead a hundred percent
4
SPEAKER_02
And by the way, the security guards are just gonna make it worse, because then you re gonna get a guy, maybe you have a guy that can fucking handle himself, and he s not scared of your security.
4
SPEAKER_02
And now there s two people getting hurt.
4
SPEAKER_01
Or the security guy gets shot first.
4
SPEAKER_02
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, dude, that s... Oh, that s crazy, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s what people will do for attention.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s just nuts.
4
SPEAKER_02
But that s alien, dude, it s alien weaponry.
4
SPEAKER_01
You might be on to something.
4
SPEAKER_02
They re coming from under the sea.
4
SPEAKER_01
Here s the thing.
4
SPEAKER_02
They re giving us weapons.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m all about USOs now, dude.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah?
4
SPEAKER_01
I m all about- Undersea UFOs?
4
SPEAKER_02
It s unidentified submersible objects.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s where they are, dude.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
They re at the floor of the- That s what Cat Williams said.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
We were talking about sonar hearing devices.
4
SPEAKER_02
That just touched my heart where I m like, do we both have the same crazy theory?
4
SPEAKER_01
He said, is this correct or incorrect?
4
SPEAKER_01
I love that.
4
SPEAKER_01
We were talking about space, about how we know more about space than we do about the ocean, which is true.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he was saying that those underwater listening devices were most likely so that they could hear UFOs moving around.
4
SPEAKER_02
Dude.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because if there really are, imagine if there really are bases under the ocean and they know about them.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, here s the thing, if they know about them, fuck you, you should tell us.
4
SPEAKER_02
But here s what I think.
4
SPEAKER_02
Theory I had because I heard about I listened to an episode of last podcast on the left where they were talking about usos And I got super into it because I was high enough You know when the song hits correctly sometimes the podcast will do that and I was listening to last podcast on the left and it hit where I go like it unlocked because they had this theory that that they talked about that the millions of years it took us to crawl out of the water and evolve into
4
SPEAKER_02
Fucking Liz you know whatever we are like monkeys and then Neanderthals and then humans all that millions of years there were things under the ocean evolving For millions of years with technology and stuff, and we re just up on the roof
4
SPEAKER_01
But yeah, the problem is we ve never seen anything other than us that manipulates its environment.
4
SPEAKER_01
The intelligent things that we found in the ocean that are real are dolphins and orcas.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And whales.
4
SPEAKER_01
And what about- Dolphins and orcas are crazy intelligent.
4
SPEAKER_01
But like octopuses too, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s true too.
4
SPEAKER_01
But none of them, octopuses are very smart.
4
SPEAKER_01
But none of them have ever figured out how to make things like make houses and cars and ships and it s all like they re out in the wild.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s no houses.
4
SPEAKER_01
I used to do a bit about how dangerous the ocean is because there s no doors.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s no doors no matter what it s just there s cave sharks and crabs and no doors Yeah, and everywhere you look everything is eating everything.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s literal murder soup.
4
SPEAKER_01
They all eat each other It s a ladder of eating.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes, everything goes up and it s something at the top you have killer whales that are eating whales
4
SPEAKER_01
They eat everything.
4
SPEAKER_02
But what if we re missing something?
4
SPEAKER_02
What if we don t see it?
4
SPEAKER_02
What if we are too stupid?
4
SPEAKER_02
What if we re just like rock monkeys and they re just like, they can t see down here.
4
SPEAKER_02
These guys have no fucking clue.
4
SPEAKER_02
You know when you re in a tinted car and someone s like looking in the window and you re looking at him like, look at this fucking idiot.
4
SPEAKER_02
He doesn t even see me.
4
SPEAKER_02
Mate, what if that s...
4
SPEAKER_02
Us with the aliens in the water what if we re like looking down there in the water And they re like these fucking idiots even when they come down here.
4
SPEAKER_02
They can t see shit That s possible.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s possible that they also can be completely invisible Yeah, we re really close to being able to do that now with stuff
4
SPEAKER_01
They figured out how to like project what s behind things on screens.
4
SPEAKER_01
So you can you can like have theoretically have a vehicle that as it s moving through an environment, it s projecting what s there.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s a predator shit.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, like literally that s that s a concept that they re working on.
4
SPEAKER_01
They re working on for air aircrafts They re working on it for for vehicles.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s terrifying And that s just step one step two would be do something that alters reality Around the thing so it s invisible.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah it
4
SPEAKER_02
Like so that s right, so you go into the ocean, and we re like down there, and we re so limited yeah We can t breathe down there, so we re limited We re in like submarines or we have robots And it s just like us it s just like a fucking ring every footage under the sea looks like a ring doorbell where it s just like
4
SPEAKER_02
And we don t know what the fuck.
4
SPEAKER_01
They could be behind it like these idiots.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s so little of it that we ve explored.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s only like 10% of the ocean floor that we ve explored.
4
10%.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s so crazy.
4
10%.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then the thing that they always see UFOs or USOs over water, it s like the high frequency that they see them.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then they just fucking, just down in there and they re like, follow me, bitch.
4
SPEAKER_02
And we re like, we can t, we can t breathe.
4
SPEAKER_02
You know, space or the ocean, we can t breathe down there.
4
SPEAKER_02
We have a limited amount of room we can move around in.
4
SPEAKER_00
Just the idea of something being here the whole time is so creepy.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
And them.
4
SPEAKER_02
But us being what s comforting is we re all so stupid.
4
SPEAKER_02
We don t see it.
4
SPEAKER_02
Right.
4
SPEAKER_02
Imagine if you had a friend that s like, hey, if a couple people could see it, you would be terrified.
4
SPEAKER_01
Imagine if society had gotten to a point at one point in time
4
SPEAKER_01
where artificial intelligence and human brains mixed.
4
SPEAKER_01
And we created a super class of species, like a new thing that s both technological and biological.
4
SPEAKER_01
And only a small number of beings got that.
4
SPEAKER_01
And those beings, for some reason, left.
4
SPEAKER_01
and left us here the way we are.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s what we re seeing with these aliens.
4
SPEAKER_01
Those are humans that went down the road that we re going down right now.
4
SPEAKER_02
And they were like, dude, we re going to get out of here.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and then maybe there was like all the disasters that happened like the the Younger Dryas impact the asteroids hit and all that stuff in level society But they escape because they re interdimensional travelers.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they re like we re gonna get the fuck out of here It s like leaving a house.
4
SPEAKER_02
You re just like I don t care about this house somewhere else.
4
SPEAKER_01
They don t need food anymore They probably work on nuclear energy or something.
4
SPEAKER_02
There s probably some crazy power like antimatter Yeah, it s like a thing that we would never even think of yeah They don t need to breed
4
SPEAKER_02
The thing that I the Jimmy Carter brief did you you know about this when he?
4
SPEAKER_02
Were they briefed him in it like broke him emotionally where he was like so upset where they were like hey by the way They ve been here forever like there.
4
SPEAKER_02
He was like a deeply religious man well
4
SPEAKER_01
Tucker Carlson s talked about this recently really yeah, Tucker Carlson said that he believes that they ve always been here And he believes that it s probably he you know he was talking about like good and evil Yeah, we all we know that good exists And we know that evil exists sure we know that people are capable of doing evil like these are real forces in the world yeah, and
4
SPEAKER_01
There so people what people are saying is that these experiences some people are having with like benevolent ones That you re this is the stories of demons.
4
SPEAKER_01
This is the stories of the bible that there s like there s there s races that are evil
4
SPEAKER_01
There s alien races that don t give a fuck, just like there s praying mantises that eat hummingbirds.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like in nature.
4
SPEAKER_02
Just because they re super smart.
4
SPEAKER_02
There are creatures that are aggressive, that are smart, like a hyena.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then there s animals that are aggressive and just powerful, like lions.
4
SPEAKER_01
And think about us, the smartest animal on the planet that we know of, and what do we do to chickens?
4
SPEAKER_01
Fuck them.
4
SPEAKER_01
No.
4
SPEAKER_01
Those chickens.
4
SPEAKER_02
I go, no, you don t fuck.
4
SPEAKER_02
God damn.
4
SPEAKER_02
This is where my whole world unravels.
4
SPEAKER_02
I go, Joe, I fuck chickens, dude.
4
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_02
I didn t think you were going to get me like that.
4
SPEAKER_02
But yeah, there could be the idea of benevolent aliens of like,
4
SPEAKER_02
The idea that there are aliens that are good and aliens that are bad scares me so much more, because you re just like, please leave me alone.
4
SPEAKER_01
And good ones bail me out of it.
4
SPEAKER_01
But imagine if something became super intelligent, but in a more balanced environment.
4
SPEAKER_01
Instead of the way humans are so much more intelligent than everything else, what if there was other shit around that was pretty close to us?
4
SPEAKER_02
You re saying like what if the food chain the gap wasn t as big between one and two right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Would we have that would be a lot nicer to each other right, but would we ever get to this point?
4
SPEAKER_02
That s the thing I think if it did it would be a slower roll way slower, but I also believe that community and empathy would be higher if we had less of us and
4
SPEAKER_02
More of a threat more if there were if there was like I tried this as a bit But it never worked if dolphins had legs Like if they just came out because they rape and like if dolphins came out and just on land And you d be like because they re so they re all muscle.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, so they would just fuck our shit up.
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh, they kill you Yeah, a dolphin that could breathe.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and then yeah, we re absolutely fucked So pro dolphin, but dolphins evolved legs, and they just become the worst rapist
5
SPEAKER_01
on the planet.
5
SPEAKER_01
And they re like, what were you wearing?
5
SPEAKER_02
No, they rape your dog.
5
SPEAKER_02
They rape everything.
5
SPEAKER_01
Just everything.
5
SPEAKER_01
They rape your car.
5
SPEAKER_02
They re super intelligent.
5
SPEAKER_01
They just fuck everything they find.
5
SPEAKER_01
My Ultima got fucked by a dolphin.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m going to be late to work.
5
SPEAKER_01
Your emus laid out in the fucking garage.
5
SPEAKER_01
They re just like a tornado of rape.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s just coming through and fucking the town up.
5
SPEAKER_02
They also commit infanticide.
5
SPEAKER_01
What s that?
5
SPEAKER_02
They kill babies.
5
SPEAKER_02
They got those Chinese anti-NATO laws.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t think they call it infanticide.
5
SPEAKER_02
What do they call it?
5
SPEAKER_02
Infanticide is like large-scale killing of children, I think.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think I might have exaggerated that.
5
SPEAKER_02
But I think what they do is when female dolphins have babies, apparently they won t breed for a long period of time while they re raising that baby.
5
SPEAKER_02
Sure, they re being good moms.
5
SPEAKER_02
What male dolphins were do if they have not had sex with the female dolphin?
5
SPEAKER_02
I hope I m not fucking any of this up They ll kill the babies to fuck them all force the mom into breeding again forcing back into estrus That s a trailer trash the strategy that the female dolphins have employed is to have sex with as many male dolphins around her as she can So that no one knows who s the baby?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, so everyone s like that might be my kid exactly and
5
SPEAKER_02
Genius, way to- Reports of infanticide and cestations have been quadrupled in the past decade.
5
SPEAKER_02
And now infanticide has now been documented in six species of toothed whale, including multiple populations of common bottlenose dolphins.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
So if you re a grown dolphin, you ve made it through a lot.
5
SPEAKER_01
You made it through a lot.
5
SPEAKER_01
You made it through a lot of dolphins wanting to fuck your mom while you were a kid.
5
SPEAKER_02
If you can t make a house, the world is rough.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do you know how different I would have been?
5
SPEAKER_01
I was raised by a single mom who dated.
5
SPEAKER_01
If all those guys had to kill me to fuck my mom, do you know how dangerous I would be right now?
5
SPEAKER_01
I would be dead.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I d be absolutely dead.
5
SPEAKER_01
You d be dead.
5
SPEAKER_01
You were a kid.
5
SPEAKER_01
Also, I was a little sweetie pie.
5
SPEAKER_01
I was a Kevin McCallister.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m not setting home alone traps.
5
SPEAKER_01
I would have gotten rolled.
5
SPEAKER_01
Dennis, I ll tell you the guy s name.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s hilarious.
5
SPEAKER_01
He was the first guy my mom dated after my dad.
5
SPEAKER_01
Dennis would have killed me.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, probably.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, because he would have been like, wait, you re not going to fuck when this kid s around?
5
SPEAKER_01
And she s like, he s not.
5
SPEAKER_02
Just coming up behind me with piano wire.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think for dolphins, it s like six years too.
5
SPEAKER_01
That times out exactly how old I was.
5
SPEAKER_01
I was maybe five when my mom started dating.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s so funny to think about them.
5
SPEAKER_01
I have to be like, my mom s like, I m going on a date.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s the whole day.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m just like where the fuck is he come get me you son of a bitch How weird is it we put those things in swimming pools?
5
SPEAKER_01
And pet them in ride them and shit.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, just tricks do a trick I so weird I went to the Atlanta Aquarium they have a great aquarium and I was doing shows there and I went and went to the dolphin exhibit and I thought it was funny because these dolphin trainers are also scientists and
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but then they have to dance it s like the weirdest thing they re like they know all this stuff about dolphins But then they re like hey do a little do a little routine and feed him a fish And you re like how disrespected are you as a scientist that they re like and fucking twirl around a little bit And making these incredibly intelligent
5
SPEAKER_01
Wild, wild beasts of the sea do these dance?
5
SPEAKER_01
I m surprised they don t snap all the time.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do they kill a lot of trainers?
5
SPEAKER_01
Killer whales do.
5
SPEAKER_01
They ve killed a few.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s when they bring them down.
5
SPEAKER_02
There was one they kept using them because they re so valuable, a male killer whale.
5
SPEAKER_02
So, he killed someone and they kept him around.
5
SPEAKER_01
Who s the guy that s next up on that?
5
SPEAKER_02
Who s the guy that they re like- I think they sold them to another place.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s what you do because no one working there will be like- Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Whatever happened with that one?
5
SPEAKER_02
There was one in SeaWorld.
5
SPEAKER_02
So the four fatal attacks by orcas in captivity, Tilikum was involved in three.
5
SPEAKER_02
So he killed three people.
5
SPEAKER_01
He s the one from Blackfish, right?
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Bro, he killed three people.
5
SPEAKER_01
Damn, he s got three bodies on him.
5
SPEAKER_02
Why wasn t Tilikum put down?
5
SPEAKER_02
Brancho s family and animal rights activists say they do not want to see Tilikum killed.
5
SPEAKER_02
How do you say that name?
5
SPEAKER_02
Branchio?
5
SPEAKER_02
Branchio.
5
SPEAKER_02
Branchio.
5
SPEAKER_02
Branchio.
5
SPEAKER_02
Branchio s sister, Diane Gross, told the Associated Press that the trainer loved the animals like they were her children and would not want anything done to that whale, even though it killed her.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Get over it, lady.
5
SPEAKER_01
That thing s murdering people.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
It killed your kid.
5
SPEAKER_01
If you re the family members of one of those people- You don t want that whale killed?
5
SPEAKER_02
First of all, you should really let it go.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
Because you re holding it in captivity against its will, and it s a super intelligent behemoth of the sea.
5
SPEAKER_02
It didn t die until it had a lung infection.
5
SPEAKER_02
Damn, it went down with emphysema?
5
SPEAKER_02
So where did it take it?
5
SPEAKER_02
They moved it somewhere after it killed three people?
5
SPEAKER_02
Just imagine working at that fucking place.
5
SPEAKER_02
And you go, who do we get?
5
SPEAKER_02
This is the killer whale that s killed three people.
5
SPEAKER_02
We got Tilly.
5
SPEAKER_00
Started in Orlando, moved to Victoria, British Columbia, and then back to Orlando.
5
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
Damn.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s a long trip.
5
SPEAKER_02
He sired 21 calves throughout his life.
5
SPEAKER_02
So that s what they want him for.
5
SPEAKER_02
They want his jizz.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they just want his hot orca whale jizz.
5
SPEAKER_02
Because you re not allowed to capture them anymore.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, wasn t that that show Whale Hunters all about that?
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know, I didn t see it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, dude, it was wild.
5
SPEAKER_01
It was on Discovery, I think, and there was just these guys going out there and they were trying to stop people from whale hunting.
5
SPEAKER_01
So they just like smash into their boats and shit.
5
SPEAKER_02
Isn t it crazy that they re saying you re not allowed to go capture them?
5
SPEAKER_02
Okay, everybody would agree that s a good thing, right?
5
SPEAKER_02
Sure.
5
SPEAKER_02
But you re allowed to keep them and make them breed and make you more of them.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s like saying no more slavery, except for the slaves you have.
5
SPEAKER_02
And you can have kids with them, and those count.
5
SPEAKER_02
But no new slaves.
5
SPEAKER_01
But no new ones.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s almost like saying- You can t go buy a new one, but you can keep the one you have right now and force it to breed.
5
SPEAKER_02
If they are as intelligent as us, but they just can t manipulate their environment, it s very similar.
5
SPEAKER_02
It s not a human being obviously so we don t respect it and treat it the same way as we treat ourselves sure Imagine if it was a human being in the same role that would be insane if there was a human being that had to live in a swimming pool and and do tricks and and feet if like if it s as smart as a human being yeah and
5
SPEAKER_02
You go insane.
5
SPEAKER_02
They don t know how smart they are.
5
SPEAKER_02
They really don t know so you think they just feel crazy the whole time They re just like percent just out of their fucking mind nuts.
5
SPEAKER_02
How am I fucking?
5
SPEAKER_02
I have to dance to feed to eat and you re trapped in a swimming pool Where s the ocean?
5
SPEAKER_01
But it just be like us in a room like a pretty big room that you could run around in and some of them are born in captivity when this one was
5
SPEAKER_00
Captured at two years old it was put into one tank in Iceland and that was transferred and when it was transferred to the new tank in British Columbia It was abused it said by two older female.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh Wow It says forced him into a smaller pool that is crazy get out of here He s like I go to the medical pool Wow the trainers had to keep him in the other pool for protection So it s probably isolated just like a person who becomes a serial killer.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah abused isolated
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, no wonder he s killing people.
5
SPEAKER_02
Because he s trying to, he s flailing to get out.
5
SPEAKER_02
He doesn t want to live like that, you fucking asshole.
5
SPEAKER_01
So that s why he grabs a lady that s like, I think we can get him up here.
5
SPEAKER_01
But that energy of them getting like killed right before you go.
5
SPEAKER_01
Shut the fuck up.
5
SPEAKER_01
She goes, I think we can get, guys, if you clap, I think he ll come up.
5
SPEAKER_01
And you just feel that like, that pull, that like animal strength of an orca whale, that has to be the most terrifying way to die because you are drowning, which is horrible, but number two, you re being forced down by a thing that s the size of a building.
5
SPEAKER_01
Or not that big, but like it s the size of a Mack truck and it s fucking holding you down at the bottom of a pool.
5
SPEAKER_02
And you re just trapped in its teeth.
5
SPEAKER_02
So it obviously doesn t give a fuck about you.
5
SPEAKER_02
But it s holding you in a way that you re like, well, this is it.
5
SPEAKER_02
Rescue attempts were thwarted by the whales who refused to let Byrne go even after she was believed to have fallen unconscious in the water.
5
SPEAKER_02
Her corpse was later retrieved with a large net, after which she was determined to be deceased.
5
SPEAKER_02
Her death was ruled an accident. 
5
SPEAKER_02
It s murder!
5
SPEAKER_02
That was murder.
5
SPEAKER_00
So the whales were like, they were keeping her there?
5
SPEAKER_00
They were high-fiving after?
5
SPEAKER_02
They were stopping the rescue attempts, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
They gapped each other up after?
5
SPEAKER_02
They wanted her dead.
5
SPEAKER_02
They were like, we got her.
5
SPEAKER_02
They wanted her dead.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s so crazy.
5
SPEAKER_02
They re so smart, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
Also, was she the head trainer?
5
SPEAKER_01
The lady that got killed?
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, she was only 20, and then I m reading in the second one, the second one was a guy, they call him a vagrant, snuck into the pool.
5
SPEAKER_02
Which, by the way ... And Tilikum killed him?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_02
By the way ... Well, that s on him.
5
SPEAKER_01
You re sneaking, dude.
5
SPEAKER_01
That is the Ace Ventura moment, where he s like, here, snowflake.
5
SPEAKER_02
That guy that guy fuck you yeah, that s on you That s him, but I m on Tilikum side like what are you doing?
5
SPEAKER_02
Why are we still allowing that?
5
SPEAKER_02
That s so crazy that after if anybody s watched that movie that Orca movie
6
SPEAKER_01
What is it called?
6
SPEAKER_01
Blackfin?
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, Blackfish?
6
SPEAKER_01
Blackfish.
6
SPEAKER_00
I thought you were going to say Free Willy.
6
SPEAKER_01
I was going to go, I know, and the soundtrack.
6
SPEAKER_01
Blackfish or have watched any of the documentaries, any of the YouTube videos that you could see about orcas in captivity.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s crazy that that s legal.
6
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s torture.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you re taking a thing that- It didn t do anything, and it s a prisoner.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s a prisoner for life.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s also a giant, it needs space.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s insane.
6
SPEAKER_00
I can t imagine feeling guilt-free owning that place.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s literally like you being stuck in this room for the rest of your life.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then I come out and I do a sick routine, and then I come back in, and you give me cheeseburgers, and I come back in here and I go like,
6
SPEAKER_00
That new Batman bits really hitting Stuff my face, and then finally I ve just had enough of it after years.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah years of daily of just that yeah And by the way absolute abuse because I m sure or cuz they re smart enough that they don t always Listen to commands like anything with intelligence.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s not a hundred percent gonna listen to commands, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
It s got to think and sometimes it doubts and sometimes like yeah And then they probably were like abusing it the fact that they killed her and that the other whales did look out like a fucking prison hit
6
SPEAKER_00
Would I would be like yeah, I don t speak a turn, but if I was her family Back to Shamu cuz I was like why did they call him all Shamu?
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah the first one not the first But it was one of the first ones was called Shamu and this one had an incident to it didn t though the woman didn t die but in which she bit the legs and hips of Annette Eckes
6
SPEAKER_01
A SeaWorld employee who was told to ride her as part of a film publicity event.
6
SPEAKER_01
Shamu refused to release the woman until other workers came to the rescue and pried the orcas jaws apart with a pole.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
6
SPEAKER_02
She died four months later.
6
SPEAKER_02
The whale, not the woman.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, she s only conditioned to perform with trainers wearing wetsuits.
6
SPEAKER_01
So the problem is this girl got on her with wearing a bikini.
6
SPEAKER_00
Because by the way, it was 71, so they were absolutely doing that like, why don t you give him a sexy ride?
6
SPEAKER_00
A sexy ride on Shamu.
6
SPEAKER_00
Shamu loves sexy ladies.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then Shamu was like, I am a devout Muslim.
6
SPEAKER_00
He s like, either get a burqa on.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s, I mean, dude.
6
SPEAKER_01
She didn t like skin.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
Get your dirty vagina off of me.
6
SPEAKER_00
You fucking weird rock monkeys touching me with your fucking land scheme you get your feet on me your dry skin She was only trained to do it with people wearing wetsuits.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so she had previously attacked people in bikinis before And if you re like if you re one of those guys that like is running that park And you re all sexed up on cocaine on good 70s cocaine, and you re like yeah, baby.
6
SPEAKER_00
You can run shimoo
6
SPEAKER_00
They re like, hey dude, I don t think you should put her on there.
6
SPEAKER_00
He goes, no, no, no, it s a sexy ride.
6
SPEAKER_00
She loves sexy rides.
6
SPEAKER_00
He pulls up in his Trans Am.
6
SPEAKER_00
He s like, yeah, you can ride the whales.
6
SPEAKER_00
Because back in the 70s, they didn t give a fuck about animals.
6
SPEAKER_00
They didn t give a fuck.
6
SPEAKER_00
70s and 80s.
6
SPEAKER_00
Dude, what am I?
6
SPEAKER_00
Fur coats, bro.
6
SPEAKER_00
Dude, Milo and Otis.
6
SPEAKER_00
There s a movie called Milo and Otis in the 80s and 90s.
6
SPEAKER_00
What is it?
6
SPEAKER_00
It s a movie about a puppy and a dog that love each other, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
My favorite episode of Legion of Skanks ever is, I wasn t even on it, Louis J Gomez talks about it, gets teared up because he loves the movie so much.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think he was drunk on the podcast.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s like, if you watched it in your childhood, it sticks with you.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s a movie about a dog and a cat from 86, and it s like,
6
SPEAKER_01
Aww.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s about a pug and this cat and they re friends and they just go on a wild adventure through wherever they re going through, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
6
SPEAKER_00
And you re like, as part of my childhood, it s live action.
6
SPEAKER_00
I remember this being like, dude, this is such a sweet movie.
6
SPEAKER_00
You look up the animal abuse that occurred on this movie and I can t even watch this because it upsets me knowing there s, I think you can look it up, there was a scene involving a cat where they killed like
6
SPEAKER_00
12 of them to get this scene done because I think it was filmed in a country with like No animal rights like no at all and they are just like that scene That was the scene where the cats in the thing.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think they lost like a bunch of cats Oh, there was a scene where they had to make him walk with a limp and they were just breaking his leg.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that s what I mean you read about it and you re like oh it
6
SPEAKER_00
Once they did that episode on skanks, and then I read about it, because I was listening to the episode playing video games, and I was like, I gotta look this up.
6
SPEAKER_00
It fucked me up.
6
SPEAKER_00
I can t.
6
SPEAKER_00
My god, it s the animal welfare allegations.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah Okay, yeah, they probably aren t going into the details, but you can find the details online, but they were like Because you see it, and you re like oh look at that an animal and a cat friends well isn t that like the idea of like if you ran like
6
SPEAKER_01
Billionaire pedophile business sure all right.
6
SPEAKER_00
I m with you.
6
SPEAKER_00
You did it through an animation company Oh, isn t it kind of like that well the Nickelodeon thing where that guy got busted that guy Jay And I talked it on the bonfire before I left, but this guy at Nickelodeon Did he was like on remember the show head of the class I?
6
SPEAKER_00
Don t remember yeah, this guy names his name s Dan something and he was a higher up at Nickelodeon and it found out that he was just like Like wildly abusing everyone like feet pictures dude his pool at his house this guy Dan Schneider This guy his pool at his house is a foot foot
6
SPEAKER_00
And he was accused of having a crazy foot fetish.
6
SPEAKER_00
If you have a crazy foot fetish, don t make your pool a foot.
6
SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there s a series.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s what it is.
6
SPEAKER_00
I learned all my shit from bad documentaries.
6
SPEAKER_01
The problem is if you get busted for something like that and you look like that, everyone s gonna believe you did it.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but you got pedophile face like a motherfucker.
6
SPEAKER_01
He s got that face.
6
SPEAKER_00
You re like ...
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s a deviant shit.
6
SPEAKER_00
You know who else had that was the guy that did all the boy bands in Orlando Lou Loop what was his name Lou Pearlman Lou Pearlman?
6
SPEAKER_00
You re just like yeah, you abuse you abused kids like you see a picture of him brought the best ones Jimmy Savile
6
SPEAKER_00
My god, dude, yeah, look at that.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah, look at him.
6
SPEAKER_00
Just a bunch of hot boys screaming like they re all having a good Oh my god, he looks like a Philip Seymour Hoffman wore a fat suit and played an evil guy it was on worse heroin Yeah, if he was on me heroin look at him.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god, but Jimmy Savile was like the creepiest-looking creep of all time, but
6
SPEAKER_00
By the way, he did shit that was like, in the documentary, I don t even know if they brought it up, he would fuck with kids that were dying on the step of death, maybe even past.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, that is an evil, evil man.
6
SPEAKER_00
And also, who wears a mesh shirt like that when you re all old and got turkey skin?
6
SPEAKER_00
A freak, a sexual freak.
6
SPEAKER_01
And he had his own supply of kids, and he s sexually abusing these kids.
6
SPEAKER_00
And these kids are like, dude, I m dying.
6
SPEAKER_00
I got fucking leukemia, and I gotta fuck this weird looking dude.
6
SPEAKER_01
But imagine that other people knew.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
And they protected it.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s the worst part.
6
SPEAKER_01
There s no way no one knew that he was fucking kids.
6
SPEAKER_00
No, it s like the Sandusky thing in Penn State, where there were people that were like, kind of found out about it, and then were scared that if they said anything, they d lose their job.
6
SPEAKER_00
Right.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then you re like, well, that s where the power comes in.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s not necessarily a clean and cut thing.
6
SPEAKER_00
thing morality wise I mean obviously it is I think you say if you see something you say but like those people kind of who are next to that kind of power well they have that thing in them that they want to be close to that power yeah they have that like thirst to be close to that power so they re not gonna say anything because if they say anything they re kicked out of the party and they don t want to get you know what in reality guys like him should be hunted for sport yeah by
6
SPEAKER_00
and then you put that on cable.
6
SPEAKER_00
And I watch that.
6
SPEAKER_00
And you get really rich.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you get really rich hunting bad people.
6
SPEAKER_00
And you go like, I want to see Jimmy Savile.
6
SPEAKER_01
Bro, imagine if we did have the ability to film things in HD from the sky, where you never interacted, you could do the entire show.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s coming.
6
SPEAKER_01
And it s Jimmy Savile gets let loose, and one of those kids is 18 now.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yes, baby.
6
SPEAKER_00
And he s got a battle axe.
6
SPEAKER_00
And it s him and his dad, so it s like a bonding experience.
6
SPEAKER_00
Or you get the guy Larry Nassar from Michigan State.
6
SPEAKER_00
I just watched that video of the dad trying to attack him in court.
6
SPEAKER_00
That ll fire you up when you see a dad be like, can I get a minute with him?
6
SPEAKER_00
And the judge is like, you know, I can t do that.
6
SPEAKER_00
He does that move and then he gets like this guy.
6
SPEAKER_00
And it s completely understandable.
6
SPEAKER_00
Larry Nassar s a piece of shit.
6
SPEAKER_00
What happened to that guy?
6
SPEAKER_00
Did he get in trouble?
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
By the way, shout out his daughters for being proud the entire time of him.
6
SPEAKER_00
They don t ever break.
6
SPEAKER_00
They watch it, and they re like, thanks, Dad.
6
SPEAKER_00
He just wanted to get his hands on Larry Nassar.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s wild.
7
SPEAKER_03
Wow, that guy got some air.
7
SPEAKER_03
That dude can fucking jump, man.
7
SPEAKER_01
That was a full Goldberg spear in the air.
7
SPEAKER_03
That was not instantaneous.
7
SPEAKER_03
He was preparing for that.
7
SPEAKER_03
There s no way.
7
SPEAKER_03
Did he back pivot?
7
SPEAKER_03
Did he go like... Do you think he did like a... No, he just went for it, man.
7
SPEAKER_03
It was so fast.
7
SPEAKER_03
There s a moment where you wonder if he goes like this.
7
SPEAKER_03
It was so fast.
7
SPEAKER_03
Watch how fast he moves.
7
SPEAKER_01
Here he is.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah!
7
SPEAKER_01
Gets her, too.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
He jumped over the whole desk.
7
SPEAKER_01
Bro, he jumped over the whole desk.
7
SPEAKER_01
Whatever prison he gets put in, you re hoping there s a longest yard situation where you can use this guy on the field.
7
SPEAKER_03
That guy s going to be a hero.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, dude, he s going to go in and be like, damn, you got her, too, because he got him.
7
SPEAKER_03
It was an arm tackle.
7
SPEAKER_03
He got her.
7
SPEAKER_03
Did you see what they did to him, though, the next time they brought him in?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they muzzled him and kept him like Hannibal Lecter.
7
SPEAKER_03
Like Hannibal Lecter.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, show how they brought him in the second time.
7
SPEAKER_03
Look at how they brought him in.
7
SPEAKER_01
Which you should have entrance music like a fighter.
7
SPEAKER_03
Look at this guy.
7
SPEAKER_01
Look at that.
7
SPEAKER_01
They gave him a net.
7
SPEAKER_03
He s chained.
7
SPEAKER_03
His hands are in bags.
7
SPEAKER_03
He can t use his fingers.
7
SPEAKER_03
He s handcuffed and shackled.
7
SPEAKER_03
And they got seven guys around him.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_03
Wild, man.
7
SPEAKER_03
Dude.
7
SPEAKER_03
Look at his eyes.
7
SPEAKER_01
Fuck, but you know what you hear that thing imagine being him right now But you hear that thing where the judge goes like cuz I from what I read he was prepared to get like paroled I think like that s where he wasn t his head And the judge is like no no no you re staying for like five more years And he s like fuck that shit like that is such an instantaneous like yeah
7
SPEAKER_01
Fuck this.
7
SPEAKER_01
What?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_03
I don t know what he did.
7
SPEAKER_03
I don t know what the situation was.
7
SPEAKER_01
But in that moment of being told, nah, nah, nah, you re ... He had just been doing a speech.
7
SPEAKER_02
I remember hearing it.
7
SPEAKER_02
He said he had not been committing crimes anymore.
7
SPEAKER_02
He s rehabilitated.
7
SPEAKER_02
And she s like, no, I don t think so.
7
SPEAKER_00
She then did the Kembe Mutombo, and she s like, no, no.
7
SPEAKER_02
What was he being tried for like what was he there for Battery no way not that guy doesn t have an aggressive bone in his body.
7
SPEAKER_02
Oh
7
SPEAKER_01
Dude, but by the way, that is a fucking hell of a defense.
7
SPEAKER_02
Battery on a protected ... Oh, that s the one we got for the ... Oh, that s what he got for her?
7
SPEAKER_01
That s what we got for the judge.
7
SPEAKER_03
For jumping at the ... They hit him with the book.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_03
They hit him with so many charges, and it s a viral video.
7
SPEAKER_03
They have to put a stop to that.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s like streakers.
7
SPEAKER_01
Right.
7
SPEAKER_01
They don t show them on TV, and then when they do catch them, they re like, we got to hit you with something.
7
SPEAKER_01
We got to hit you something big.
7
SPEAKER_01
I was at the Super Bowl, and the streakers that got there ... Did you see the one guy bet on himself?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s immediately what I said to Che when we were at the game.
7
SPEAKER_01
I was like, dude, those guys put a bet down that they would do this and they re gonna make a lot of money off this.
7
SPEAKER_03
That s pretty wild.
7
SPEAKER_01
Because why not?
7
SPEAKER_01
You d be like, I bet there ll be a streaker in the third quarter.
7
SPEAKER_01
And then you re like, I can affect that.
7
SPEAKER_03
That s pretty wild.
7
SPEAKER_01
My favorite s that all these betting sites now allow wrestling.
7
SPEAKER_01
As a lifelong wrestling fan, I m like, come on, guys.
7
SPEAKER_03
That s hilarious.
7
SPEAKER_01
This is crazy.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re watching Monday Night Raw, and they re like, Monday Night Raw, Draft Kings.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re like, this is fake.
7
SPEAKER_03
This is predetermined.
7
SPEAKER_03
How is that legal?
7
SPEAKER_03
Did you guys start trying to ruin gambling forever?
7
SPEAKER_03
Dude, also, what s next?
7
SPEAKER_01
You re gonna bet on Fast and Furious movies?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
I bet Vin hits Nas in the first fucking hour of the movie.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re like, this is fucking wild.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re watching, you re gonna bet on plays, on like Broadway plays, where you re like, you know, funny girl, I bet she has a problem at the end of act one.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s fucking ridiculous.
7
SPEAKER_03
It s so stupid.
7
SPEAKER_01
And I love wrestling, but I would never be like, oh, finally.
7
SPEAKER_01
My favorite thing was coming up with gambling for my friends when we watched the Royal Rumble.
7
SPEAKER_01
Like, you put money in a pot, and then you get numbers, and then that s your guy.
7
SPEAKER_01
But not, like, going on an app and putting down, like, a thousand bucks.
7
SPEAKER_01
Fuck that.
7
SPEAKER_03
Well, I think guys get super addicted to that too.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s gambling.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s a hundred percent gambling you ask you ask like people that went to gambling gamblers anonymous like people that have been through the program through that and they ll be like
7
SPEAKER_01
Fuck heroin, well they say it does the most damage.
7
SPEAKER_01
It does the most damage out of all the addictions.
7
SPEAKER_01
Heroin is a set price.
7
SPEAKER_01
There s no set price with gambling.
7
SPEAKER_01
And by the way, the more you go up, the higher the high and lower the low.
7
SPEAKER_01
So you re doing big, big bets.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re gonna, if you get fucked, you re fucked.
7
SPEAKER_01
Sure, if you win, it s amazing, but then all you do is you just wanna go do it again.
7
SPEAKER_01
People don t walk away, it s like dealing drugs.
7
SPEAKER_01
People never walk away from that shit.
7
SPEAKER_01
They never win.
7
SPEAKER_01
The house always wins.
7
SPEAKER_01
They re gonna take your money.
7
SPEAKER_01
Always always they re not they have the smartest Pete did I had a buddy when I first moved out east I lived with my buddy Morgan in New Jersey And he loved he loved the taste and this was like when you had to go to a bookie and shit So he was like doing some real gambling He would get so fucking into it, but then he was right He would yell this thing all the time when he would bet on the points and the points would hit to fuck him He would be like they re from the future
7
SPEAKER_01
They re from the fucking future.
7
SPEAKER_01
He would like scream it if he lost like a thousand dollar bet on the Knicks and you re like Yeah, they have the smartest guys working for them Like they know how like to set the line like all those guys are fucking crazy smart
7
SPEAKER_01
They re crazy smart, and they use analytics.
7
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re going against Wall Street.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re going against guys that probably could be making millions on Wall Street.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
And you re just like, yeah, I think the Chiefs are going to win.
7
SPEAKER_01
Dude, the worst was gambling is got, it was in Vegas, so obviously there s more gambling.
7
SPEAKER_01
But the Super Bowl,
7
SPEAKER_01
If your team s in the Super Bowl, you fucking care.
7
SPEAKER_01
But I ve been to two Super Bowls, and what I ve learned is there s a lot of people there that don t give a shit.
7
SPEAKER_01
They just want to go to a Super Bowl.
7
SPEAKER_01
They re just at a Super Bowl.
7
SPEAKER_01
They don t care who the teams are.
7
SPEAKER_01
As someone who does care who the team is, it s a different viewing experience.
7
SPEAKER_01
So the fourth quarter of the Niners-Chiefs game, I m a diehard Niners fan.
7
SPEAKER_01
I am sweating.
7
SPEAKER_01
Che and I are punching each other in weird ways.
7
SPEAKER_01
We re just like this the whole time.
7
SPEAKER_01
We re holding hands.
7
SPEAKER_01
It was fucking nuts.
7
SPEAKER_01
These fucking guys in front of us were just these, like, business CEOs from North Carolina.
7
SPEAKER_01
And as they got drunk, they, like, they noticed Che, because, you know, he s on SNL, so they, like, know a famous guy.
7
SPEAKER_01
So they kind of were doing that thing where they wanted to talk to us, but we were like, dude, it s a fucking Super Bowl.
7
SPEAKER_01
Like, we re watching the Super Bowl.
7
SPEAKER_01
This is big for us.
7
SPEAKER_01
We re 49ers fans.
7
SPEAKER_01
Can we watch this?
7
SPEAKER_01
And by the fourth quarter, the guy goes,
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I ve got a parlay if Brandon I you can get two more catches And I just put my hand in front of his face, and I went what do you know?
7
SPEAKER_01
I don t want to talk to you right like he was turned around talking to me, and you re like Because he thinks I care about his bets.
7
SPEAKER_01
You re like dude.
7
SPEAKER_01
I love this team.
7
SPEAKER_01
We are almost at the mountaintop
7
SPEAKER_03
Shut the fuck up right about it s like having a party over your house It s just the wrong person shows up and just camps out in front of you and starts talking to you And you re like do you not understand?
7
SPEAKER_01
I give too much of a shit about the 49ers because it was the only thing my dad and I shared so I give like that extra extra
7
SPEAKER_01
Like, this is connected.
7
SPEAKER_01
Like Boston with the Red Sox.
7
SPEAKER_03
It s like, yeah, it is.
7
SPEAKER_03
National identity.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s a disease more than it is an enjoyment.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s like a thing, like, I see that logo and I m like,
7
SPEAKER_01
Fucking care so much and that s hilarious they played last season they played the Eagles in the NFC Championship game and All my friends are from Philly like a lot of my comedy friends are Eagles fans Big Jay Vecchione fucking Shane Tommy like there s so many guys.
7
SPEAKER_01
I know that love the Eagles, but specifically Big Jay and Big Jay s like dude.
7
SPEAKER_01
I m having a party and
7
SPEAKER_01
Come over and watch it, and I was like no I care way too much.
7
SPEAKER_01
I care way too much, and it was just him Eagles fans and then friends that didn t give a shit, and that s what I said I was like I know there s gonna be one person that talks to me that I m like please don t talk to me right now But also I m the enemy over there, so then I watched it at home worst decision I ve ever had in my life because I watched it alone, and I just went like crazy like an orca whale I
7
SPEAKER_01
Screaming at a TV by myself.
7
SPEAKER_03
I do that if I watch fights.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, yeah if I watch a good UFC at home I m screaming yeah, cuz you must shut the door.
7
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
7
SPEAKER_01
It s pure enjoyment It s like yeah, it s the sports viewing equivalent of walking around your hotel naked.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you re like no one can come in here This is my room, and I m gonna do whatever the fuck.
7
SPEAKER_01
I want right now.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s unbelievable
7
SPEAKER_03
And if you re live and you re screaming, it just seems normal.
7
SPEAKER_01
But you want one other person there.
7
SPEAKER_01
You want a person, all I had was my dog, and she didn t understand- Why you were yelling?
7
SPEAKER_01
Why I was so fucking hyped up.
7
SPEAKER_01
And when Brock Purdy s elbow got injured, she just saw me spiraling away.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know when dogs can tell you re anxious or whatever?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
She s just like slamming her body into my leg and shaking, and I m like, no, no, no, it s all right, it s all right.
7
SPEAKER_01
We re fucking still in this thing.
7
SPEAKER_03
My dog is so sweet that he freaks out when there s violence in movies.
7
SPEAKER_01
Oh, really?
7
SPEAKER_03
We re watching movies together.
8
SPEAKER_02
I was watching this new Netflix show.
8
SPEAKER_02
What is this new Netflix show?
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a Korean series about people that get infected and they become monsters.
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
8
SPEAKER_02
I think it s called Sweet Home or something like that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Sounds badass.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s fucking great.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a fun show, but there s some violent moments where the monsters get people and the dog is like, what the fuck is going on?
8
SPEAKER_02
He gets up, and he starts spinning around.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s called Sweet Home.
8
SPEAKER_00
Dude, that is- Fun show, man.
8
SPEAKER_00
Dogs having anxiety about stuff they don t understand.
8
SPEAKER_02
He got a toy.
8
SPEAKER_02
He s bringing the toy to me.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m like, dude, it s not real, man.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s not real.
8
SPEAKER_00
Dude, my dog, whenever a dog comes on the screen, because she s a big dog, she s like, what the fuck?
8
SPEAKER_00
Fuck, like someone s in her house.
8
SPEAKER_00
Like we ll just be chilling there and then she ll try to like, Shane came over and was hanging out.
8
SPEAKER_00
It was the first time he met Myrtle and I think my dog was like trying to impress him.
8
SPEAKER_00
Cause most of the time she ll look up and be like, and you re like, shut the fuck up.
8
SPEAKER_00
But this one, she was like.
8
SPEAKER_00
Like ran to the TV.
8
SPEAKER_00
We re like, you re not big.
8
SPEAKER_00
Stop acting big.
8
SPEAKER_00
If that dog was in this room, it would fuck your shit up.
8
SPEAKER_00
Also, she only barks at cute dogs.
8
SPEAKER_00
If it s like a hellhound or something, she s like, nah, I m good.
8
SPEAKER_00
She just completely passes over it.
8
SPEAKER_00
She s like, nah, I m not fucking around with that.
8
SPEAKER_00
The first time Marshall saw the American Werewolf in London, he barked at it.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh, in there?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that thing, if you re a dog, that has to be terrifying.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he saw it and he just went, woof.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
Is he cool with it now?
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
He knows it s not real.
8
SPEAKER_00
All right.
8
SPEAKER_02
But that first time, he s like, what the fuck?
8
SPEAKER_02
The first time, he s like, woo!
8
SPEAKER_02
And he hardly ever barks.
8
SPEAKER_02
Does Carl?
8
SPEAKER_01
One of his first barks ever, I think.
8
SPEAKER_01
Carl saw it and was like- And he says, what the fuck?
8
SPEAKER_01
You make noise?
8
SPEAKER_00
Holy shit.
8
SPEAKER_00
Hey, cool.
8
SPEAKER_00
Dude, that is great that you have a dog that you don t know if it barks or not.
8
SPEAKER_02
Marshall never barks.
8
SPEAKER_02
He ll bark if he wants to come inside.
8
SPEAKER_02
Like if someone leaves him outside for a bit, and he comes to the door, he ll bark.
8
SPEAKER_02
He ll like one bark.
8
SPEAKER_00
Like, Mom!
8
SPEAKER_00
Dad!
8
SPEAKER_00
Someone s here!
8
SPEAKER_00
Dad!
8
SPEAKER_00
We wrote it.
8
SPEAKER_00
We were like, because we got her during the pandemic, so everyone was inside in New York.
8
SPEAKER_00
And so we re like, don t bark.
8
SPEAKER_00
We live in an apartment.
8
SPEAKER_00
Shut the fuck up.
8
SPEAKER_00
And then hilariously, Katie and I left the dog with her parents in Boston.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
8
SPEAKER_00
And we came back, and the dog s barking.
8
SPEAKER_00
And her mom rules.
8
SPEAKER_00
And her mom, just in a boxing accent, goes, she box now.
8
SPEAKER_00
And you re like, well, no, I don t think we want that.
8
SPEAKER_00
We ve tried hard not to do that.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
8
SPEAKER_00
And now she ll just like, she ll pop off for random shit, like people in the hallway.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
8
SPEAKER_00
Because we live in a big building.
8
SPEAKER_00
Right.
8
SPEAKER_00
So someone will be out in the hallway, and she ll be like.
8
SPEAKER_00
and just that, and then it s the little grumbles.
8
SPEAKER_00
God damn it, dude.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m so jealous you can go everywhere with Carl.
8
SPEAKER_00
I wish I could bring my fat little bitch everywhere with me.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, Carl could go anywhere.
8
SPEAKER_02
Carl would just sit in your lap.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, Carl s just like- Especially if you time it right.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh, Jamie, you get to get so evil if you want to, and then you can just have a dog where you re like, that is correct.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, man, having a dog was the greatest thing about the pandemic, was we got a dog, and it has made my life
8
SPEAKER_00
It just rules.
8
SPEAKER_02
Dogs are amazing.
8
SPEAKER_00
It just absolutely rules.
8
SPEAKER_00
They re amazing.
8
SPEAKER_00
I had one growing up, and then I just didn t forever, and I was always like, no, I loved seeing dogs, but then having one, you re like ... You know what s really funny?
8
SPEAKER_02
I always try to attribute human thought to the dog sometimes.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
I m like, one of these days he s going to get bored chasing this ball.
8
SPEAKER_02
There s not a chance in hell.
8
SPEAKER_02
Every time I have one of those, it s like a stick with a scoop on the end of it that the ball goes in.
8
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah, you get to highlight that shit.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you highlight the shit out of it.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you got a fucking dog highlight.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s nice.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s fun.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you can get that thing going.
8
SPEAKER_02
He fucking loves that thing.
8
SPEAKER_02
When he sees me pull that thing, he s like... I videotaped it because it s so silly.
8
SPEAKER_02
He s like bouncing around.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, Jesus!
8
SPEAKER_02
We do that every fucking day.
8
SPEAKER_00
If someone controlled my PlayStation intake and then just pulled out a controller, I d be like...
8
SPEAKER_00
That s what it is right because you never don t get pumped to play a really good game no dude spider-man 2 I m so excited that they re coming out with DLCs coming and I m gonna go home and be like, that s me I m like Marshall with the toy.
8
SPEAKER_02
Hey, have you fucked around with VR at all?
8
SPEAKER_00
No, I don t like that shit Let me explain why old-school pothead love to be very high.
8
SPEAKER_00
I like controllers, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
What I got was a steam deck, which is like
8
SPEAKER_00
You know the Nintendo Switch?
8
SPEAKER_00
It s like that on steroids.
8
SPEAKER_00
And it gets games, like really good games for the road.
8
SPEAKER_00
It has made it, because I ve fucked with everything from Game Boy on, and having a Steam Deck, I m like, I got it for Christmas.
8
SPEAKER_00
I was like, this is the greatest thing I ve ever had.
8
SPEAKER_02
I had to draw the line with video games.
8
SPEAKER_02
When we had, we set up a LAN.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you get that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Back at the old studio.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
And I got the bug again, bad.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
Where I was like- I mean, it is.
8
SPEAKER_02
... running in there to play Quake.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, turn your brain off.
8
SPEAKER_02
Couldn t wait.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, turn the- But always feel like shit when you leave.
8
SPEAKER_02
Like, what the fuck did I just do?
8
SPEAKER_00
You gotta do it in small servings, or there has to be a purpose to it, where you re like, you re done at this moment.
8
SPEAKER_00
Because if you can go, that s where you get sick.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s as if you can just keep going until, you need an ending point.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s why Madden, the game ends, and you re like, I played two games, I m good, I should walk away from this.
8
SPEAKER_02
With Quake, you could play death matches, where you have five, six guys in a room, and you re all killing each other.
8
SPEAKER_02
And you respawn, and it gets up to a certain amount of deaths.
8
SPEAKER_00
Dude, I I absolutely love video games when I moved to New York.
8
SPEAKER_00
I was like I m done with them and then six months later I was like where can I get a cheap Xbox 360?
8
SPEAKER_00
I need to plug back in but yeah I mean Shane and I on my podcast were just talking about NCAA college football is coming out and we re I think gonna plan a vacation around playing it because it s a game that hasn t been out since 2014 and
8
SPEAKER_02
How does the new Apple, what is it called again?
8
SPEAKER_02
Vision Pro work.
8
SPEAKER_02
Does it work?
8
SPEAKER_02
I know it works with movies, but does it have to be everything from like the App Store or could you play like PlayStation on it?
8
SPEAKER_02
You can play PlayStation?
8
SPEAKER_01
Yes, there s a way.
8
SPEAKER_01
I ve seen people connect
8
SPEAKER_02
If you could do that then you re watching augmented reality PlayStation, so you re that s the way to get me a screen Yeah, you re seeing a screen.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s like fucking 30 feet wide and You re on the field.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, dude.
8
SPEAKER_00
I would love to be a remote controller.
8
SPEAKER_02
Just like you do with your your regular game.
8
SPEAKER_02
I
8
SPEAKER_00
You know, I grew up with the Miami Dolphins coach, Mike McDaniel.
8
SPEAKER_00
It d be fun to play Madden and just be standing next to him in VR with a controller.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m like, run the goddamn play, Mike!
8
SPEAKER_02
Dude, I fenced with Mark Zuckerberg, and we weren t anywhere near each other.
8
SPEAKER_02
He was on one side of the room, like 15 feet away.
8
SPEAKER_01
Wait, you did this?
8
SPEAKER_01
Really?
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, this is the best example I can show you, is that, like, they re playing Red Dead Redemption 2.
8
SPEAKER_01
Red Dead Redemption on a big screen, but this is the Yosemite environment that the Apple headset puts you in.
8
SPEAKER_00
I love that.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh wow so the sky is dark.
8
SPEAKER_00
Because here s the thing Red Dead Rockstar did such an incredible job.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s insane.
8
SPEAKER_00
I would shit.
8
SPEAKER_00
By the way there s scenes where you re out.
8
SPEAKER_00
Look how big it is too.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s your entire field of view.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah and you can look around and just see.
8
SPEAKER_01
That s about the most you could do right now.
8
SPEAKER_02
But that must be amazing when your entire field of view is taken up by the game.
8
SPEAKER_00
And in moments like this, like Red Dead, there s moments where you re in the desert or where you re in a rainstorm up in the mountains.
8
SPEAKER_02
Here s the question.
8
SPEAKER_02
Can you play Quake on that?
8
SPEAKER_00
Dude, you know what it is?
8
SPEAKER_00
You re like one of those people, you go, I don t party anymore.
8
SPEAKER_00
And then like two hours later you go, you got it from Peru?
8
SPEAKER_00
You go, I m just gonna do a gummer.
8
SPEAKER_02
This is, look how flaky it is.
8
SPEAKER_02
Is that pure?
8
SPEAKER_01
I saw your reaction to those screens in there.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
8
SPEAKER_01
The big 55 inch screens.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
8
SPEAKER_01
I have one of those at home, and I try to play Call of Duty on it.
8
SPEAKER_01
There is a level of, it s too big.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
Really?
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_00
What do you mean it s too big?
8
SPEAKER_01
It just gets too small?
8
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever played a Call of Duty in front?
8
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever gotten really close to the screen to play?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, when we when we moved in to our apartment, we put the wrong TV in the bedroom and Katie plays Call of Duty and she she was playing video games like this too much This is too much because the screen was like fucking on it.
8
SPEAKER_02
So we were like, oh, yeah, we switched it out I remember back in the quake playing days that guys didn t like some guys didn t like monitors that were more than 21 inches and
8
SPEAKER_02
They wanted it right in front of them so that because you know you re moving your mouse right and I didn t know I didn t know quake was a keyboard yeah Mouse that s like some real shit real shit.
8
SPEAKER_00
That s the real.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s the real shit.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s the scary shit That s like you get really good at the movement with the key the keys and you get really good with your cursor and you know how to jump and and every time you hit the spacebar you re jumping and
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s like Counter-Strike.
8
SPEAKER_00
People used to be into Counter-Strike.
8
SPEAKER_02
But Quake is really fast.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
The thing about Quake is it s superhuman speeds.
8
SPEAKER_02
You re moving at superhuman speeds with rocket launchers.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, hell yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
And you can instantaneously change weapons.
8
SPEAKER_02
You rocket someone in the air and you electrocute them to death.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s insanity.
8
SPEAKER_02
If you could do that, like that, on that kind of a screen.
8
SPEAKER_00
I don t know, but I ll tell you what.
8
SPEAKER_00
I m looking up Quake 4 on my Steam Deck when I get to my hotel.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a keyboard mouse.
8
SPEAKER_02
You really want a keyboard and a mouse.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s tough.
8
SPEAKER_02
You don t want to fuck with it.
9
SPEAKER_00
You need really precise movement.
9
SPEAKER_00
Find a good one with good graphics.
9
SPEAKER_01
The thing I m trying to show you is how close some people put their face to their screen.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they get right up on that.
9
SPEAKER_00
I would imagine if you re controlling a 21 inch space and you are very accustomed to moving your cursor around a 21 inch space with your mouse.
9
SPEAKER_00
You re moving it around, you re very precise.
9
SPEAKER_00
If you stretch that bitch out to 40 inches or 45 or 50, now you re doing this.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that does it s all it s all in one right there.
9
SPEAKER_00
You you really want it like a 21-inch monitor.
9
SPEAKER_00
I think 24 to 27 is the sweet spot.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s it, right?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it makes sense And then you got to get glued onto that screen because you don t want to go back and forth the screens It s gonna fuck with your timing.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you need something.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s a while.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you need to consider those guys are fucking freaks with their mouse sensitivity and the weight of the mouse Yeah, they add weights to the mouse that take weights away some of them like lighter mouses They make mouses that are hollow to take as much weight out of them as possible these guys make custom
9
SPEAKER_00
Gaming mice mice mice go find the the lightweight gaming mice.
9
SPEAKER_00
They literally like you know they do with racecars Yeah, they d like take everything out anything that weighs anything they drill holes in the door handles They do that those look at these mice hybrid dude look at that.
9
SPEAKER_00
They re there s like skeletons ones.
9
SPEAKER_02
There s a hundred and seventy dollars
9
SPEAKER_02
Do there there s by the way more than that it s at Pwnage I Love that s called Pwnage.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, do 495 see that one in the lower right hand side Yeah, it says euro gamer Jamie the right hand middle.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, all right there that lightweight in the middle row That s my style
9
SPEAKER_02
Damn, dude, and so what you re hitting because I know you are you using the wheel on the top?
9
SPEAKER_00
I use the wheel to switch weapons sometimes I use the real I ll use the real for a rail gun so when I know I want to hit the rail gun I just turn the wheel and it turns into the rail gun instantly so I have keys pressed that are all set up exactly for each weapon and
9
SPEAKER_02
I feel like a coke head talking to a crack head.
9
SPEAKER_02
I do blow and you go, I smoke it out of glass after it s a rock.
9
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, this is nuts.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
Right key is all rocket launcher.
9
SPEAKER_02
Always.
9
SPEAKER_02
Always.
9
SPEAKER_00
Always.
9
SPEAKER_00
Keep that thing on rocket launcher.
9
SPEAKER_00
Left key is fire.
9
SPEAKER_00
How long the games last like you said they re fast, but like five minutes faster like well They ll there s a timer okay, so like if you re having a one-on-one deathmatch They ll set a timer and it ll count you down And then it ll say fight, and then you re just running through the corridor picking up weapons trying to pick up armor And then dudes know where you re at because they can hear you because they can hear your footsteps And you re grunting as you re running and so you re running through these corridors.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s always one-on-one
9
SPEAKER_00
One always well, you can know you can do multiple death matches where you just have a fucking melee Yeah, it s like 30 dudes.
9
SPEAKER_00
Just killing each other like respawning, and they kill you those are fun.
9
SPEAKER_00
Those are really fun, but The way to do it like one-on-one deathmatch style is the real way to do it Do you have a friend?
9
SPEAKER_02
Do you have any friends that if you picked quick for up you could call them and be like we do it I wouldn t do that to them
9
SPEAKER_00
I wouldn t do that to them.
9
SPEAKER_00
You wouldn t bring that back in their life.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s too immersive, man.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s too good.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s too good.
9
SPEAKER_00
And if you have responsibilities.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_02
Oh, no.
9
SPEAKER_02
I mean, dude, I do my responsibilities.
9
SPEAKER_00
Look at this.
9
SPEAKER_00
This is quick.
9
SPEAKER_02
So it s kind of similar to Fortnite, right?
9
SPEAKER_00
Look how fast this motherfucker s moving.
9
SPEAKER_00
So he s shooting the rail gun.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now the rail gun kills you instantaneously.
9
SPEAKER_00
The rail gun is like wherever you point at, you hit.
9
SPEAKER_02
Oh, and you got that doom view.
9
SPEAKER_02
This is like doom.
9
SPEAKER_00
Look at this.
9
SPEAKER_00
And you re running insanely fast.
9
SPEAKER_02
Look how fast this moves.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s fun to watch the camera on the guy because his face is doing nothing because he s so concentrated.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
And you can see how he s switching weapons.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now he s back with the rail gun.
9
SPEAKER_00
He s got a rocket launcher.
9
SPEAKER_02
He s just flying around.
9
SPEAKER_02
Are they?
9
SPEAKER_00
Shotgun.
9
SPEAKER_00
Boom.
9
SPEAKER_00
Shotgun.
9
SPEAKER_00
Killed that dude.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now he s got the rocket.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that was the rail gun.
9
SPEAKER_00
This is the rocket.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s the rail gun.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s the rocket launcher.
9
SPEAKER_02
So he s just hopping around.
9
SPEAKER_02
Do they do, like, pro tournaments of this?
9
SPEAKER_02
Fuck yeah, they do.
9
SPEAKER_00
This is the finals.
9
SPEAKER_00
This is the top two guys.
9
SPEAKER_00
Really?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
So see how he keeps running back to these spots?
9
SPEAKER_00
That means the weapons are respawning.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
So every time you snatch a weapon, you have a little bit of time.
9
SPEAKER_00
Boom.
9
SPEAKER_00
Fuck that.
9
SPEAKER_00
Damn.
9
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_02
All right.
9
SPEAKER_02
This is the closest we ve seen.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now they re shooting rail guns at each other.
9
SPEAKER_00
So a railgun is like an instantaneous death unless you re really armored up.
9
SPEAKER_02
Did he kill that guy?
9
SPEAKER_02
It s 11 to 3.
9
SPEAKER_02
So whoever liquid RPH is.
9
SPEAKER_00
He fucked that dude up, but that dude had to run and get some more shit.
9
SPEAKER_00
So he had to run and get health.
9
SPEAKER_00
So now he knows where he is.
9
SPEAKER_00
Now he s chasing him.
9
SPEAKER_02
How good did you get at this?
9
SPEAKER_00
I got D.
9
SPEAKER_00
You got decent, but you would get on and then see some guys Because there s games when you play online games You ll go against people and you re like you re a different love you don t have the time to compete with some autistic dude Who s on ADHD medication dial doesn t have a job?
9
SPEAKER_00
Gets a government check, and he s just rocking people online South Park where they play World of Warcraft and their their villain is that guy it s like oh
9
SPEAKER_00
Those wrist brace on those guys get good and their identity Wraps around their their whatever their name is and they re going out fucking people up There s certain guys that you would see on a server and you re like, oh no, really?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you have a match with them.
9
SPEAKER_00
You just get killed.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah under did not do you get that thing really like stop?
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah, you get panicky, you re like running into walls trying to find armor.
9
SPEAKER_02
Get blown up again.
9
SPEAKER_02
Do they have videos of them freaking out?
9
SPEAKER_02
Because that s something I like to see is like gamers spazzing and being like, what the fuck?
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, there s a lot of those on Twitch, right?
9
SPEAKER_02
Great.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s almost better than sports fans losing it, punching TVs.
9
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s so crazy, and you can do it anytime you want.
9
SPEAKER_00
So you could have a match anytime you want.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s too tempting.
9
SPEAKER_00
Online with real people.
9
SPEAKER_00
Anytime you want.
9
SPEAKER_00
You log in, you see a server, you join the server, boom.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you re in it.
9
SPEAKER_00
There s one-on-one death matches where there s people waiting.
9
SPEAKER_00
So you ll look, you ll find a server, you re like, one guy s waiting.
9
SPEAKER_00
Death Slayer 69 is waiting.
9
SPEAKER_00
And he s just like.
9
SPEAKER_00
And you spawn, and they ll start talking shit.
9
SPEAKER_00
You re like, fuck you, bitch.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, and you got the keyboard so you can talk quick.
9
SPEAKER_00
Talk shit.
9
SPEAKER_00
Fuck you, bitch.
9
SPEAKER_02
Do we have to ... We ll play online Rocket League or whatever, which is like car soccer and it s fun.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, this guy s playing.
9
SPEAKER_01
He s about to rage right here too.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I rage a lot at Rocket League.
9
SPEAKER_01
What is this?
9
SPEAKER_02
I ve played this for years.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s soccer with cars, which sounds, dude, it is so addictive.
9
SPEAKER_02
We get online at night and Katie and her brother Kevin are both really good at it.
9
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, I get too intense and I m like, fuck, fuck.
9
SPEAKER_02
And I like miss the ball and be like, fuck.
9
SPEAKER_02
But you ll play guys that you re like oh this guy s too good like he ll hit it in the air And then just like over you just score a goal, and you re like what are you doing?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah?
9
SPEAKER_02
There s tricks people can do and quake yeah That s what I mean like guys that get so good at it that you re like guys rocket jump
9
SPEAKER_00
Rocket jump so if you you are fully armored you have 200 armor You can point your rocket down at the ground and jump at the same time as you pull the trigger, and you go flying Oh, that s genius so you could rocket launch and rocket jump up to like a platform and then hide And then just start picking bitches apart
9
SPEAKER_00
And so everybody that walks in, you got the rail gun, you got your cursor pointed right at the doorway, and every time people run in the doorway, boom!
9
SPEAKER_00
Out.
9
SPEAKER_00
Respawn.
9
SPEAKER_00
Dead.
9
SPEAKER_00
Dead.
9
SPEAKER_02
That s how it is when I watch people play Call of Duty.
9
SPEAKER_02
I m like, oh, you re just picking people off.
9
SPEAKER_00
Campers.
9
SPEAKER_00
People get very mad at campers.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, dude.
9
SPEAKER_00
But it s a fucking look, you re going to get mad at snipers in a war.
9
SPEAKER_00
Shut the fuck up.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s the part of the war.
9
SPEAKER_00
Were you mad at a sniper?
9
SPEAKER_00
Snipers are cheating.
9
SPEAKER_00
Stop camping.
9
SPEAKER_01
He s like, I m a sniper.
9
SPEAKER_01
Was cheating big back when you were playing?
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
There s bots.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
So they would hide.
9
SPEAKER_00
They would like.
9
SPEAKER_00
People would program there was different bots and one of them was an aim bot So that what the aim bot would do is you could never miss so if you you just with a regular stupid gun Yeah, like that only does like you know ten points of damage every time it hits you you get a pistol when you start sure You re minimally armed.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s why you re going around getting the guys It s very difficult to kill a fully armored guy with a pistol sure or a rifle or whatever you get so then you have to run and grab all
9
SPEAKER_00
armor, you have to run and grab a rocket launcher.
9
SPEAKER_02
It s like a super, what are those, sweepstakes?
9
SPEAKER_02
The superstore sweepstakes where they re like, go!
9
SPEAKER_02
And you re just going through and being like.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yes, you re just running through, trying to gather up as much shit.
9
SPEAKER_00
And you know the map.
9
SPEAKER_00
Everybody has maps memorized.
9
SPEAKER_00
So they know when things are spawning.
9
SPEAKER_00
And some of them even have prompts that tell them, health spawns in 30 seconds.
9
SPEAKER_00
So every time they pass over armor, armor respawns.
9
SPEAKER_00
And they have it all listed on the map, and they re running around.
9
SPEAKER_00
And the guys would have these aim bots, and they could never miss.
9
SPEAKER_00
So they would kill you, and every time they kill you, they would be fully armored, they d have all the weapons, and then they d know exactly where you were gonna be, and then they would kill you again, and they d kill you again, and kill you again, and you couldn t, every now and then they would die, and they would respawn, and they would kill you again, because they couldn t miss.
9
SPEAKER_02
I would love to just talk.
9
SPEAKER_01
Is this a name bot?
9
SPEAKER_01
This is all sorts of, at the beginning of this video, which you were talking.
9
SPEAKER_01
This is Call of Duty?
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it shows you the cheats you can buy and how you can subscribe to them per month.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, so you pay a company and they give you all that shit?
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that s crazy.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that made me mad.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s crazy.
9
SPEAKER_00
And how do you prevent that?
9
SPEAKER_00
You don t.
9
SPEAKER_00
Bro, Call of Duty s a lot quicker than I thought it was.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s fast as shit.
9
SPEAKER_00
This game gets very fast.
9
SPEAKER_02
When they do multiplayers, there s one game- That s almost Quake-like.
9
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, there s one there s one level where they re
10
SPEAKER_02
in storage units that I watch.
10
SPEAKER_00
Shipment.
10
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, shipment.
10
SPEAKER_02
That s what it is, and it s nonstop.
10
SPEAKER_02
You just turn a corner, you re dead.
10
SPEAKER_02
Shoot, dead.
10
SPEAKER_02
Whoa.
10
SPEAKER_02
That fast.
10
SPEAKER_02
Whoa.
10
SPEAKER_02
I remember one time, laser tag, back in the laser tag days.
10
SPEAKER_01
Laser tag.
10
SPEAKER_02
I camped one time.
10
SPEAKER_01
You were a laser tag camper?
10
SPEAKER_02
I camped at laser tag.
10
SPEAKER_02
I just sat by the charge station, and every time someone would recharge, I d be like,
10
SPEAKER_02
My stats were like I m surprised I didn t get a call from the military it was like 700 I had like 300 kills it was something wild because I was just sitting there I was like a shitty little nine-year-old just being
10
SPEAKER_01
Know what you want to do?
10
SPEAKER_01
What?
10
SPEAKER_01
You want to do the zombie experience at Sandbox.
10
SPEAKER_02
What is this?
10
SPEAKER_01
Sandbox is a VR game place.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
10
SPEAKER_01
You go and there s a thing called Deadwood Mansion and then there s a new Deadwood something.
10
SPEAKER_02
So you go to a place to do VR.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
They have two zombie games.
10
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
10
SPEAKER_01
You put on the headsets, and you are in a house.
10
SPEAKER_01
You are in this house that s getting stormed by zombies.
10
SPEAKER_01
And everyone has something.
10
SPEAKER_01
You either have two pistols, or you have a shotgun, or you have a rifle.
10
SPEAKER_01
Listen to me.
10
SPEAKER_01
Get the shotgun.
10
SPEAKER_01
The shotgun is overpowered.
10
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes they fuck up when they make a game.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they gotta nerf a weapon.
10
SPEAKER_01
The shotgun s overpowered.
10
SPEAKER_01
The shotgun kills everything.
10
SPEAKER_01
The shotgun is the weapon.
10
SPEAKER_01
And you just stand there and it- You just cha-cha-boom, cha-cha-boom.
10
SPEAKER_01
But you re in a safe room so you don t run- I m just downing zombies, bro.
10
SPEAKER_02
So you don t run into a table or anything.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but you run into your friends, too, sometimes, because you re all together.
10
SPEAKER_01
You can see each other, though.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh, so if you bump into- I can see you.
10
SPEAKER_01
So literally, I would see you with your armor on.
10
SPEAKER_01
I would know where your space is, and we would all be moving around together.
10
SPEAKER_01
But sometimes you bump backs into each other.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
But there s zombies coming to the ceiling.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re storming at you and clawing at you.
10
SPEAKER_01
You see red in front of you when they get you.
10
SPEAKER_02
As someone that has sworn off VR, this is the way to get me into it, which is saying VR zombies.
10
SPEAKER_02
Dude, it s so fun.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s so fun.
10
SPEAKER_01
Because it s got to be scary as shit.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
At one time, I had the number three score for this Deadwood Mansion game.
10
SPEAKER_01
I was like, what?
10
SPEAKER_01
Because I got the shotgun.
10
SPEAKER_01
Did you feel it, though?
10
SPEAKER_01
Because one of the dudes who worked there told me, get the shotgun.
10
SPEAKER_01
I was like, really?
10
SPEAKER_01
He goes, yeah, get the shotgun.
10
SPEAKER_01
I was like, thanks, man.
10
SPEAKER_01
Because you show up, he goes, hey, Joe Rogan, get the shotgun.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s fucking overpowered.
10
SPEAKER_01
I was like, thanks, man.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s really fun.
10
SPEAKER_02
It s a crazy game dude, but that s crazy What the VR does to video games is it just heightens the emotional impact that it has on you because it s sensory It s like kind of like deprivation tanks, but like it s just putting all the senses into that yeah
10
SPEAKER_02
Because like I was obsessed with this game Friday the 13th that they made back on ps4 and you would either be a counselor or Jason and it s just all along dude.
10
SPEAKER_02
It s fucking wild it was why I Loved it, but what I would do is I d smoke a fucking doink I
10
SPEAKER_02
I would smoke a giant joint, and then I d turn off all the lights in my apartment, and I d play Jason, and it s scary, because this is the guy as Jason, but you go around and you hunt.
10
SPEAKER_02
See the counselors inside?
10
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, you re hunting counselors?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_02
Bro.
10
SPEAKER_01
Dude, it is ...
10
SPEAKER_02
And that s the phone box.
10
SPEAKER_02
That s how you call the cops.
10
SPEAKER_02
He s got set in a trap.
10
SPEAKER_02
He s a decent Jason.
10
SPEAKER_02
I still play it sometimes, and I got it.
10
SPEAKER_02
I m level 150.
10
SPEAKER_02
He set a trap at the... So Jason is smart?
10
SPEAKER_02
Well, you can set... It s you.
10
SPEAKER_02
It s all strategy.
10
SPEAKER_02
It s you versus these counselors.
10
SPEAKER_02
Right, but Jason can set traps.
10
SPEAKER_02
He has five bear traps and then five throwing knives.
10
SPEAKER_01
Doesn t that seem unrealistic that Jason would know how to set traps?
10
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he s a stupid mutant that drowned in the lake.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s dead.
10
SPEAKER_01
He s a monster.
10
SPEAKER_01
Shouldn t be set at traps.
10
SPEAKER_02
You get so scared, dude, you get so scared when you re like, because when you re a counselor, you re just like walking around, you re like going through drawers trying to find weapons or whatever, and then all of a sudden it s just like, in the background it s slowly like, and then when Jason shows up at, when you re at a cabin, he ll smash the window and it s like, and if you have headphones on, you re like, get the fuck out of here.
10
SPEAKER_02
I m getting all goosed up, I m going home, I m playing Jason.
10
SPEAKER_02
If the servers are still up, I m fucking back on it when I get home.
10
SPEAKER_01
I have not seen it, but I have heard legend of this alien game that s on VR that s supposed to be insane.
10
SPEAKER_01
Like Alien, the first movie.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh, Alien.
10
SPEAKER_01
Ridley Scott Alien.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
There s an alien game.
10
SPEAKER_00
I just watched Prometheus.
10
SPEAKER_01
This is true?
10
SPEAKER_01
I want to I want to I want to make sure this is true because someone told me it s a terrifying game that you can play on VR that s based on the first alien I Just went they told me this they told me this at least a year ago.
10
SPEAKER_01
Maybe more data Probably more than a year ago.
10
SPEAKER_02
Do you think we see in the future?
10
SPEAKER_02
Do you think we see things like heart attacks and shit from VR as they re already happening like people getting so scared that it hurts them in real life and
10
SPEAKER_01
Well, I think if you re really vulnerable and your heart gets jacked up to like 190 beats a minute Especially if you have one of those guys on those omnidirectional Treadmills they have now.
10
SPEAKER_02
Oh, really dude.
10
SPEAKER_01
They have a surface.
10
SPEAKER_01
This is a new surface that it s a contained surface like a contained space and
10
SPEAKER_01
And whatever direction you walk in, it moves.
10
SPEAKER_02
Oh, so it does like the topography of like... No, no, no.
10
SPEAKER_01
It just stays flat.
10
SPEAKER_01
But every... You can go left and right, and it goes left and right, and it goes... You back up, it backs up with you.
10
SPEAKER_01
You stay in the same spot, but you re walking around.
10
SPEAKER_01
And it somehow or another registers through the headset into the flooring which direction you re going, and it compensates for that.
10
SPEAKER_02
They re going to think we re such idiots in the future when they re like, you re just holding a controller and playing.
10
SPEAKER_00
But do you know what kind of good shape you would get in?
10
SPEAKER_00
Disney updated this.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s not available yet, but they ve made one that s now they ve shown it this year.
10
SPEAKER_01
Here s what you do.
10
SPEAKER_01
You put ankle weights on and you put a weighted vest on.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
And then you play one of these gun games that s like really intensive and you get that and you get jet and you re walking around with all that weight on Yeah, that s a fucking work also what they should do is you know?
10
SPEAKER_02
We got those trillions of dollars going around in our military the military probably has something like this developed 100
10
SPEAKER_02
They re with Boston Dynamics.
10
SPEAKER_01
They re probably laughing at this.
10
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they go, you want to see our robot take down a fucking village in Columbia?
10
SPEAKER_00
The alien game I found, if this is the correct one, is someone made the actual alien game and they made a VR port of it, if you will.
10
SPEAKER_00
They ve sort of hacked it so that it works in VR.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, really?
10
SPEAKER_00
I think that must be it.
10
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if that s the official.
10
SPEAKER_01
I think that must be it.
10
SPEAKER_01
But dude, alien.
10
SPEAKER_01
But what I heard is it s fucking terrifying.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, cuz you can get scared to shit.
10
SPEAKER_01
I mean I got scared shit of that Jason game And I knew what was going on, but that one movie was scarier because there was only one alien It was smart.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was great They kind of fucked that up in the second one because there s a bunch of them And they were kind of easy to kill and they also just threw it in they were like and we re on the ship We re on this planet here.
10
SPEAKER_02
You go.
10
SPEAKER_02
There s a ton of them.
10
SPEAKER_02
Oh
10
SPEAKER_01
I never bought the second one.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s a great movie all by itself Aliens is a great movie, but it s not the same thing as the first movie that first one was smart as fuck Yeah, it was smart and clever wait for people and hide like it knew how to get around you It knew how to like attack you when you weren t looking and the second one there and a little mouth.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_02
Was the little mouth in the second one where it came out?
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh, they always come out, right?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they come out of there.
10
SPEAKER_01
The little thing.
10
SPEAKER_01
The tongue is like a mouth, and it gets you right in the head and sucks your brains out.
10
SPEAKER_02
Did you like Prometheus?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
10
SPEAKER_02
I loved it.
10
SPEAKER_02
I just watched it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I did.
10
SPEAKER_01
I loved it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I loved the idea.
10
SPEAKER_02
I had a problem with ... I loved the idea.
10
SPEAKER_02
I had a problem with the ending, because she escapes on this ... Spoiler alert.
10
SPEAKER_02
She escapes on the spacecraft of the architects, like the big humans that made us, and she s going back to their world,
10
SPEAKER_02
Like that she sets the course to be like now fuck this I m gonna go where these people are from that made us and made the the animorph made Made the alien yeah It just leaves you just leaves you high and dry.
10
SPEAKER_02
We re like where d she go show me that shit I want to see what planet all these architects are living on the last one was really good alien 3 what was no the last what was the Covenant Covenant really?
10
SPEAKER_01
You know who s in that Jesse Smollett really?
10
SPEAKER_02
And when he pops up and stuff you re like oh hey like Mighty Ducks I was it was on like during Christmas, and it was just on in my hotel, and I was like hey Jesse Smollett That s the kind of mistake.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s tough to forget well.
10
SPEAKER_02
It s it s getting caught in such a major lie such a sociopathic situation but also doing something for attention that s so and you get turned on by the people that were helping you and
10
SPEAKER_02
where they go like, yeah, fuck that guy.
10
SPEAKER_02
I helped him and he s a fucking dick.
10
SPEAKER_02
And you re like, oh my God.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s what s wild is dude, if I got- It s also like the way it was structured to come in with the noose still on his neck.
10
SPEAKER_01
Like what?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, dude.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s like, oh no.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s like a- Holding a Subway sandwich.
10
SPEAKER_02
You know what it s like?
10
SPEAKER_02
It s like murder mystery dinners, you know, where they have to oversell it, where they re like, oh, the knife is still in me.
10
SPEAKER_01
But isn t that crazy that there s people out there that will do literally anything?
10
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, because they re not in therapy.
10
SPEAKER_02
They don t understand why they re reaching out for this.
10
SPEAKER_01
But don t you think people that are that broken, like it s not that simple.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s so broken.
10
SPEAKER_01
No, not at all.
10
SPEAKER_02
I think what it is is it s like,
11
SPEAKER_00
You know when there s like an infection because something s embedded in you yes, but it s not the thing that s embedded in you That s causing the problem as much as it is the part of it.
11
SPEAKER_00
That s infected and now it s got a different thing right That s what that is where it s like something happened to them and instead of them solving it and pulling that out that splinter that got infected the infection built on it and now you re dealing with six things on top of the actual problem and
11
SPEAKER_00
That s my guess yeah, but that s what it feels like because I ve seen people go through bad shit and correct it Yeah, and be okay, and I ve seen people go through kind of bad shit, and then it just there s also this thing that people do when they do things like that where they recognize that a certain amount of bullshit is
11
SPEAKER_01
Tolerable.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah a certain amount of you exaggerating an experience and Saying that you were threatened a certain amount of that seems to be tolerated Well, you don t want to question because then it appears that you re insensitive And you go well, you know, and then there were so many people that stood up for that guy and like made these tweets Well, we re knee-jerk reaction.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but it s also like we don t have any information you don t have any information and you re acting on this but
11
SPEAKER_01
the story seems so implausible.
11
SPEAKER_01
But nobody wanted to say it.
11
SPEAKER_01
Nobody wanted to say, I think he made that up.
11
SPEAKER_00
I immediately thought of...
11
SPEAKER_00
When that happened, and the reaction a couple weeks later, I immediately thought of Ben Stiller in The Cable Guy, when they re doing the Menendez Brothers spoof, and they do the phone call, and he goes, I don t know who it was, but he was Asian.
11
SPEAKER_00
They re clearly lying on the phone call, and you re like, that s kind of how that felt to me, where you re like, dude.
11
SPEAKER_00
You work in the arts.
11
SPEAKER_00
You should know how to tell a better story.
11
SPEAKER_00
Your storytelling is dog shit.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s right.
11
SPEAKER_00
So that s like they re spoofing the Menendez like they clearly killed their parents, but that was their excuse Yeah, and you re like it when someone like him who s been a child actor This guy s been a child actor his whole life right and they know how the roller coaster goes
11
SPEAKER_00
They know they re on fire, they re in Mighty Ducks, they re in fucking Alien Covenant, you know what I mean?
11
SPEAKER_00
And then they re on a big show.
11
SPEAKER_00
They re on a big fucking show.
11
SPEAKER_00
And then it starts, the tank starts running out.
11
SPEAKER_00
Where you re like, hey, the show s running out and we re not paying you as much as you think you need to get paid.
11
SPEAKER_00
You get desperate.
11
SPEAKER_00
And you start being like, well, what can I do to stay up there?
11
SPEAKER_00
How do I rocket launch?
11
SPEAKER_00
Am I wearing enough armor to jump and rocket launch myself back up?
11
SPEAKER_00
And he fucked up.
11
SPEAKER_00
And he just is like, it was a desperate move.
11
SPEAKER_01
A publicity move.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_00
Being like, if this works, I am the victim.
11
SPEAKER_00
Everyone loves a victim.
11
SPEAKER_00
Right.
11
SPEAKER_00
And it ll just keep being that, but then you get fucking caught, dude.
11
SPEAKER_00
Hilarious, it s just funny.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s just the funniest shit in the world What s up like that call when they do ran as easy did this awesome show in Edinburgh at fringe?
11
SPEAKER_00
In 2019 when I was there and he did an hour About what it was like being busted lying about 9-eleven right dude the show gave me anxiety and
11
SPEAKER_00
Because have how he did it beautifully he did it beautifully he was it was funny it started funny He was explaining how he was famous.
11
SPEAKER_00
It was the league It was the last season and he goes into the and he tells you about the call from the New York Times Where the guy goes I want to talk about 9-11 and rain is easy was like Dude, he s the way he d even telling you the way he describes it.
11
SPEAKER_00
You re like oh
11
SPEAKER_00
Fuck, but he made it funny and he made it into a thing of like I fucked up.
11
SPEAKER_00
It was a great hour I hope he taped that I don t know if you ever taped that but I mean that feeling of like Smollett getting caught when that first thing where they go they re not buying it and he s like Fuck, I think he s maintained that he told the truth to the entire time hasn t he?
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I think he I think he
11
SPEAKER_00
Did he ever say yeah, I don t know this is where I feel bad for actors because he s comedians We can immediately go like I m a fucking idiot like you we can say we re wrong much easier than actors right because actors have that and you know you ve been around them they have that like
11
SPEAKER_00
It s like being around the queen.
11
SPEAKER_00
There s little rules that you can t do, or you re like, I can t bust your balls, because you ll take it seriously.
11
SPEAKER_00
That s just how the entertainment business is.
11
SPEAKER_00
Musicians act different than actors, and actors act different than comedians, and there s just all this stuff.
11
SPEAKER_00
But I don t think as an actor, he can go like,
11
SPEAKER_00
Ah, fuck, man, I was desperate.
11
SPEAKER_00
You don t know when you re gonna get on your next show.
11
SPEAKER_00
You don t know when you re gonna get your next gig.
11
SPEAKER_00
If he would ve just done one of those, he probably would ve... But then he d have to admit that it was true.
11
SPEAKER_00
That s what I mean.
11
SPEAKER_01
And I don t think he wants to admit that it was true.
11
SPEAKER_00
And now he s stuck in that prison forever.
11
SPEAKER_00
And now he s stuck in that thing where you re like, so you re saying something that we all, that the guys involved said that you were full of shit.
11
SPEAKER_01
You know what s wild, though?
11
SPEAKER_01
I guarantee you that some people believe him still.
11
SPEAKER_01
Like, there s people that believe Cosby to the end.
11
SPEAKER_00
That is what a ride-or-die when that evidence comes out.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s like women that love serial killers You re like you can just get there, huh?
11
SPEAKER_00
It s like thinking that that orc is not gonna turn on you after it did three yeah after it killed three people and you re like You know my pool is a little bit bigger
11
SPEAKER_01
And then there s like the female vampire helper, like Ghislaine Maxwell s like the female vampire helper.
11
SPEAKER_00
There is a level of evil on that whole Ghislaine Maxwell Epstein.
11
SPEAKER_00
That s why it s such a joke right now is because it s so bad.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s like the most disgusting shit, but the it s what kind of it comes back to what we re talking about with billionaires It s like if you got that evil person in your ear right there.
11
SPEAKER_00
You re doing some dark shit.
11
SPEAKER_00
I
11
SPEAKER_01
Looks great.
11
SPEAKER_01
Ghislaine Maxwell looks great as she runs Florida prison half marathon, does yoga and Pilates ahead of March appeal.
11
SPEAKER_00
Who reads that and goes, good, good.
11
SPEAKER_00
Let her out.
11
SPEAKER_01
I m glad she s running.
11
SPEAKER_00
There s got to be people.
11
SPEAKER_00
Her life is threatened on a level that we ll never understand.
11
SPEAKER_01
Bro, there is no chance she stays alive if they let her out.
11
SPEAKER_00
No, because the people that are
11
SPEAKER_01
She s gonna be writing a book, you know.
11
SPEAKER_00
If she writes a book... There s already a manuscript.
11
SPEAKER_01
There s already like... Do you think that that s why she s in prison?
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s... Listen to this.
11
SPEAKER_01
What if she goes to prison to write a book?
11
SPEAKER_01
Because they say the only way that this information is gonna get out is if we have you walk We have you locked up.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, we protect you and you write a book dude Her information of Rolodex of the things that have happened can destroy people that are as powerful as our top businesses like
11
SPEAKER_00
Will topple kings like she she has information on people of course they re gonna lock her in that while Yeah, let her live in the villages in Florida.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, she s fucking this woman is it s she s dangerous She has a dangerous amount of knowledge, and she s probably knowing the clocks ticking
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, release of court documents expect well over a hundred people connected Epstein, which is just like well that was the full She s serving 20 years in prison for luring young women blah blah blah Share her thoughts be an attorney ahead of the release of court documents expected to name well over a hundred people Connected with Epstein Maxwell s lawyer Arthur Adala Adala said that New York Nation s Mario Kumo No, not Kumo
11
SPEAKER_01
Chris Cuomo, right?
11
SPEAKER_00
It s Cuomo, Chris Cuomo.
11
SPEAKER_00
I think it s the younger one.
11
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
11
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, the guy who used to be on CNN.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
11
SPEAKER_01
News Nation s Cuomo that Maxwell has nothing to say about the impending release of names, but that the former socialite takes issue with the fact that the only person facing consequences over the rampant sex trafficking of young girls is a woman.
11
SPEAKER_01
I don t think she has anything to talk about.
11
SPEAKER_00
That s how smart she is.
11
SPEAKER_01
Maybe that if you look at this crime, this overall crime, it s all about men abusing women for a long period of time.
11
SPEAKER_01
and it s only one person in jail, a woman.
11
SPEAKER_00
Absolutely genius.
11
SPEAKER_00
What a genius defense.
11
SPEAKER_00
Her going like this, so I guess it s a boys club when everyone s getting abused, but in court it s only a woman.
11
SPEAKER_00
And you re like, well the other guy got murdered.
11
SPEAKER_00
Like Epstein got murdered in jail.
11
SPEAKER_01
Maybe you should tell us who else is involved and we ll lock them up too.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, we ll throw some boy names out.
11
SPEAKER_00
But how weird is it that no one got named?
11
SPEAKER_00
Well, that s what I mean with she s on a- That s how you know how much power is involved in this.
11
SPEAKER_00
She s on a level of danger.
11
SPEAKER_01
That they re like she s like that s what we need to really get in our heads They re still and I can kill you in front of everybody and hide it in the news thing going on What did Putin just do yeah?
11
SPEAKER_00
Putin just killed the journalist and was like what are you guys gonna?
11
SPEAKER_00
Do and we re like oh?
11
SPEAKER_00
Subways are real nice Yeah, I always fuck it up.
11
SPEAKER_01
I seem to be Not like the sweetest of dudes either right everyone s dirty everyone s a human being that s the whole point is like there s a danger on I think
12
SPEAKER_01
spoke out against Putin.
12
SPEAKER_01
The crazy one that I m still obsessed with is the dude that tried to overthrow Putin.
12
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember that?
12
SPEAKER_01
When they were moving in with an army?
12
SPEAKER_02
Let s get to this guy first.
12
SPEAKER_02
Aleksei Navalny was a Russian opposition leader, lawyer, anti-corruption activist, and political prisoner.
12
SPEAKER_02
He organized anti-government demonstrations and ran for office to advocate reforms against corruption in Russia and against President Vladimir Putin.
12
SPEAKER_02
His government.
12
SPEAKER_02
So what was the controversy about him though his views?
12
SPEAKER_02
No, no, but there were some other ones there was some other ones like
12
SPEAKER_01
He s a Cosby believer He s like I think Bill Cosby go to bed rep He had some questionable things that I was reading but the other dude like led an army And they were like hey, he s marching on Moscow, and then he went just kidding no I m not and then a month later.
12
SPEAKER_01
They re like his plane crashed, and you re like oh
12
SPEAKER_01
Why were you getting in a plane?
12
SPEAKER_01
You went against Putin and you re gonna fly around in Russia?
12
SPEAKER_01
Are you out of your fucking mind?
12
SPEAKER_01
What the fuck is wrong with you?
12
SPEAKER_01
How is no one around him going like, you can t John Madness, you can t take a bus?
12
SPEAKER_01
We can protect the bus.
12
SPEAKER_02
Imagine thinking that Putin wouldn t kill you when you pulled up to Moscow in a tank.
12
SPEAKER_02
In a tank.
12
SPEAKER_02
He like showed up in a tank.
12
SPEAKER_02
That s before he died.
12
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
12
SPEAKER_01
Just like who he was.
12
SPEAKER_01
Who he was.
12
SPEAKER_02
So he s basically an anti-Putin activist.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s poisoned by it.
12
SPEAKER_02
Russian opposition figure, anti-corruption activist, was unlawfully detained and has now been in prison for 11 years and six months.
12
SPEAKER_02
He s still in prison and suffers continual ill treatment, including constant surveillance and psychological pressure.
12
SPEAKER_02
He must be freed immediately and unconditionally.
12
SPEAKER_02
So he died in prison.
12
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
12
SPEAKER_02
And what was the controversy about him?
12
SPEAKER_02
Someone was saying something about his nationalist views.
12
SPEAKER_02
It could be see just see if you can find something there s some someone was saying terrible things about but I mean that guy dies But you can always wonder like that is something that they would do yeah, you know they say oh, but you remember when he got that guy Litvinenko with the in England with the sushi yeah, where they just reached down and were like oh
12
SPEAKER_01
Your dad at plutonium they put plutonium in the guys sushi, and there was like he was like an ex He was like a rogue KGB agent, and they were like See, but did you think they re bad?
12
SPEAKER_01
What do you think we do?
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah?
12
SPEAKER_01
We do that, too What do you think we do we do shit that we re like the CIA s been cooking up stuff that like even Russians go like that s pretty fucking good Like do you ever think they like wink at each other like they are fucking nuts?
12
SPEAKER_01
And he s like, it s like, yeah, we fucking did this whole thing.
12
SPEAKER_01
We flew planes into our towers.
12
SPEAKER_01
And they re like, you guys don t give a fuck.
12
SPEAKER_01
Like, if there s an open conversation about it, do they just fuck around?
12
SPEAKER_02
not a western liberal democrat.
12
SPEAKER_02
There s a darker side to him, some say.
12
SPEAKER_01
That s such a fucking, they re pushing that out there to be like, hey.
12
SPEAKER_02
Is controversial views on Muslims in the caucus, Georgians and Central Asian migrants in Russia.
12
SPEAKER_02
Immigrants from Central Asia bring in drugs to Russia.
12
SPEAKER_02
Navalny said in an interview with 2012, defending what he described as a realist visa requirement for wonderful people from Tajikistan and Uzbekistan.
12
SPEAKER_02
While he was reflected upon some of these past remarks, they frequently resurface, causing some to question if Navalny is what many in the Western world think he is.
12
SPEAKER_02
Navalny s controversial statements stem from his political origins in the nationalist movement, according to McGinn.
12
SPEAKER_01
There will be a feel-good A24 movie about this guy in two years.
12
SPEAKER_02
He used to attend the Russian March, a very far-right nationalist group generally behind the slogan, Russia for ethnic Russians.
12
SPEAKER_02
Anybody who expects Navalny to be an ideal Western liberal Democrat has been mistaken, she tells Euronews.
12
SPEAKER_02
His ultra-nationalistic sentiment was prominent in a video dating back some 17 years filled with xenophobic comments.
12
SPEAKER_01
Do you think this is like his getting like when comics when they bring up old clips of comics on podcasts like he was like Oh, that was 12 years ago.
12
SPEAKER_02
I was crazy, so this is what he was saying He said everything in our way should be carefully, but decisively removed through deportation Navalny said in a video dressed as a dentist comparing immigrants to dental cavities.
12
SPEAKER_01
He s dressed up.
12
SPEAKER_01
He was doing costume work and
12
SPEAKER_01
I know we re having fun here, but really we ve got to get rid of immigrants.
12
SPEAKER_01
Maybe it was a sketch The best way to get this information of this human I want you to be over the top against the immigrants
12
SPEAKER_02
over the top, like they re fucking cavities, and I m the dentist.
12
SPEAKER_02
Navalny take care of cavities for you.
12
SPEAKER_01
They go, we ll call it Laughing Gas, and it s all sketches done like a dentist.
12
SPEAKER_01
And they just tricked this dude into doing this.
12
SPEAKER_01
They really did a movie already?
12
SPEAKER_02
I already made a documentary about them two years ago.
12
SPEAKER_01
Oh, they had it ruined.
12
SPEAKER_02
And what does the documentary say?
12
SPEAKER_02
I have no idea.
12
SPEAKER_02
Does it say, is it all a pro thing?
12
SPEAKER_02
CNN, HBO.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, HBO and CNN.
12
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, see anything anybody that s in opposition to Putin has to be good.
12
SPEAKER_02
You know, it s the enemy of our enemy is my friend.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah Yeah, that s a that s a other guy controversial take this guy was just gossiping This guy s like did you hear what Putin did and then the other guy was like I got tanks, bro Yeah, fucking pulling up to Moscow.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and he s gonna be okay thought he was fine and by the way it was in the news a lot and then it was completely gone which are like a
12
SPEAKER_02
Of course he did it, like everybody knows he did it.
12
SPEAKER_01
It sucked the air out of the room.
12
SPEAKER_02
But he s always, Putin s always like, what are you guys doing?
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s my favorite.
12
SPEAKER_02
Why are you always going after me?
12
SPEAKER_02
What are you guys doing?
12
SPEAKER_01
We haven t invaded anybody.
12
SPEAKER_01
Oliver Stone interview and the Tucker interview, he really loves to be like, you guys aren t so great.
12
SPEAKER_01
You know when you fight with your girl and she ll bring up something you did and you get defensive?
12
SPEAKER_01
So you just go like, yeah, but what s up with, you fucking, you do stuff.
12
SPEAKER_01
Totally you re a bitch sometimes.
12
SPEAKER_01
I got nothing.
12
SPEAKER_01
I got nothing.
12
SPEAKER_01
I m sorry Yeah, that s true, but he s got a point.
12
SPEAKER_01
I mean shit.
12
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember the lady that wrote him the poem?
12
SPEAKER_01
when he invaded the Ukraine.
12
SPEAKER_01
She wrote him a poem?
12
SPEAKER_01
This Hollywood actress did a thing that was like, yeah, dude.
12
SPEAKER_02
No way.
12
SPEAKER_02
This shit is so funny.
12
SPEAKER_01
No, this is not real.
12
SPEAKER_01
Don t tell me this is real.
12
SPEAKER_01
You never saw this?
12
SPEAKER_01
No.
12
SPEAKER_01
Dude, this shit is so funny.
12
SPEAKER_01
Play it from the beginning.
12
SPEAKER_01
This is the most I m in L.A.
12
SPEAKER_01
bubble.
12
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, I have to see this.
12
SPEAKER_02
I have to see this, and I don t want- Who was that Vladimir Putin?
12
SPEAKER_00
I m so sorry that I was not your mother.
12
SPEAKER_00
If I was your mother, you would have been so loved.
12
SPEAKER_00
held in the arms of joyous light.
12
SPEAKER_00
Never would this story s plight, the world, unfurled before our eyes, a pure demise of nations sitting peaceful under a night sky.
12
SPEAKER_00
If I was your mother, the world would have been warm, so much laughter and joy, and nothing would harm.
12
SPEAKER_00
I can t imagine the stain, the soul-stealing pain that the little boy you must have seen and believed, and the formulation of
12
SPEAKER_01
This is so self-gratuitous, but also ... Yeah, lady, get to the punch.
12
SPEAKER_01
There s too many superfluous words.
12
SPEAKER_02
It s quite superfluous.
12
SPEAKER_01
It s a word salad, lady.
12
SPEAKER_01
It s nonsense.
12
SPEAKER_01
But by the way, do you know that ... I bet she s ...
12
SPEAKER_01
Wild one though yeah, but you also know that Vladimir Putin was given up You know he s given up by his mother for adoption like oh really he is like a horrible relationship with his mother he was like he was given up for adoption and the people and they like started training him as a like a a
12
SPEAKER_01
Like young, young, he got into like.
12
SPEAKER_01
As a soldier.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s like a super soldier.
12
SPEAKER_01
He was like built for this shit.
12
SPEAKER_01
So this woman in a condo in Santa Monica going, I would hug you and I would feel the plight of the world on my shoulders.
12
SPEAKER_01
And he goes, lady, I was left for dead.
12
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and you would be dead as well.
12
SPEAKER_01
You would not be my mother.
12
SPEAKER_01
I would kill you.
12
SPEAKER_01
Putin is so scary that when he put on hockey equipment and played against the Russian team They let him score like six goals.
12
SPEAKER_01
It was some Kim Jong-un shit 100% They re like oh, whoa look at him.
12
SPEAKER_01
Go.
12
SPEAKER_01
He s a legit black belt in judo though is he mm-hmm Does he does Sam he does Sambo and judo?
12
SPEAKER_02
I do not know if he does Sambo as well, but he definitely does he definitely does judo He s a legit black belt
12
SPEAKER_02
Like he s an older guy, but by the way he moves and the things he does he does everything absolutely correct And I m not but I just I m not a judo expert But also I know these I know how these throws look when I see judo experts do them But this is it does it this isn t the Steven Seagal videos.
12
SPEAKER_01
He s just doing like the oh
12
SPEAKER_02
No, that s not see like right there.
12
SPEAKER_02
That s a beautiful hip toss.
12
SPEAKER_02
That is a beautiful hip toss the way He did that the way look at this smoothness man.
12
SPEAKER_02
That s legit.
12
SPEAKER_02
That s legit.
12
SPEAKER_02
Do you think he s a legit judo black belt?
12
SPEAKER_01
This is how these things are trained no, I know I m just saying but guys do resist
13
SPEAKER_01
But this is just an execution of technique just the fact that he can do that That is very like if I showed you how to do that It would take you a long time before you could do it that smoothly now.
13
SPEAKER_00
I m very dumb when it comes to
13
SPEAKER_00
both judo, but also, more importantly, I m very stupid when it comes to politics.
13
SPEAKER_00
Here s my question.
13
SPEAKER_02
Jayme, are you questioning this?
13
SPEAKER_02
No, I m not questioning it.
13
SPEAKER_02
I m just saying, if you re the guy that s going with Putin, you re definitely going to be the best dance partner of all time.
13
SPEAKER_02
Yes, but you re selling the moves.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re wrestling.
13
SPEAKER_01
I ve literally had this done to me, and it s sort of.
13
SPEAKER_01
It s actually just drilling, but I ve had this done to me by people who are good at judo, and it s shocking how easy they can throw you around.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, because he kicks his feet out.
13
SPEAKER_01
All he s doing is, it seems a lot harder than it is.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re just getting the guy, you re bouncing together, you re timing the bounce, and you re sweeping him and pulling at the same time, and you just go flying.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s like when you were little and you d be walking in front of one of your friends and they d kick your foot into the other one, and you d go like, fuck you.
13
SPEAKER_00
You d go fucking flying.
13
SPEAKER_00
Fuck you.
13
SPEAKER_00
I think wars should just be our leaders versus theirs.
13
SPEAKER_00
He would win.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s what I mean.
13
SPEAKER_00
He would fuck up all of them.
13
SPEAKER_01
He d fuck up everyone who s ever been president.
13
SPEAKER_00
That would change the way we elect our president, where we re like, who we got?
13
SPEAKER_00
Who can we roll with?
13
SPEAKER_01
Well, we would change, it would be UFC champions.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it d be like John Jones.
13
SPEAKER_00
It d be President John Jones in 2024.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_00
And we d just be dominating the world.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, we d make Alex Baheda an official U.S.
13
SPEAKER_01
citizen immediately.
13
SPEAKER_00
Dude, immigration would change so fast.
13
SPEAKER_00
Francis Ngotto, U.S.
13
SPEAKER_00
citizen.
13
SPEAKER_00
You go, I would love to have you, sir.
13
SPEAKER_00
Everybody.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, full U.S.
13
SPEAKER_01
citizenship.
13
SPEAKER_01
Raise your right hand.
13
SPEAKER_01
We fucking love you.
13
SPEAKER_01
Brazilian population shot through the roof of the United States.
13
SPEAKER_01
Well, that would be if there was one guy It would either be John Jones or Francis and God.
13
SPEAKER_00
Oh, they ll be the one person I mean, we don t know until they do it until they do the dance But you know what another country would probably be smart and they go like hey Francis, how about we give you everything?
13
SPEAKER_00
You re our king.
13
SPEAKER_00
You re everything.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and then you re just we have the best now we have the best military in the world one guy military, but we still have Bones Jones and
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_00
Oh, man.
13
SPEAKER_00
Can you imagine that?
13
SPEAKER_00
Imagine that.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then that s- We got to get Jones on steroids.
13
SPEAKER_00
We got to drop the USADA right away.
13
SPEAKER_00
Dude, I m telling you right now, USADA s gone, and they put him in a Weapon X program, where they re like, how can we- USADA s gone, Brock Lesnar returns.
13
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
13
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, dude.
13
SPEAKER_01
Brock Lesnar returns.
13
SPEAKER_01
He s 350 pounds at 49 years old.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, with 4% body fat.
13
SPEAKER_00
Just fucking trash.
13
SPEAKER_01
And you just hear the- Just like a juggernaut.
13
SPEAKER_00
And you hear that WWE music here.
13
SPEAKER_01
It s like, ba-na.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_01
And you just hear, oh, that was Roman s, but- Oh, everyone s getting smashed.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, dude.
13
SPEAKER_01
You re trapped in a cage with a superhuman.
13
SPEAKER_00
But that s what it, I mean, that was like, you know, we do that, how many lives are you saving?
13
SPEAKER_00
How many trillions of dollars are you saving?
13
SPEAKER_00
We don t need missiles and fucking, you know.
13
SPEAKER_00
We get away from the American military industrial complex and just have a badass president.
13
SPEAKER_00
And then no one talks shit about the president.
13
SPEAKER_00
You think CNN or Fox News is gonna run their mouth about a guy who s like, by the way, I m doing a press briefing.
13
SPEAKER_00
He s just doing his, he s like, oh yeah, huh?
13
SPEAKER_00
You thought about that?
13
SPEAKER_00
What about taxes he goes I think you need to shut the fuck up.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s what I think you need to do Yeah, dude cuz Putin is like
13
SPEAKER_01
He s the only badass you see that guy you go.
13
SPEAKER_01
He s killed people well I think Netanyahu has as well Netanyahu was like a serious like operative.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s really army What was Netanyahu s military background?
13
SPEAKER_01
It s like it s actually very impressive.
13
SPEAKER_00
Well.
13
SPEAKER_00
I hear about the stuff that he s done I mean yeah in Israel everyone serves so it s not a question of if he did or not yeah But I think he was like he s a special forces guy their version of that whatever the Navy SEALs are also the idea is always funny to me of running up on someone that s like
13
SPEAKER_00
trained to be a badass, and you think they re an old man.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s taken.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s the whole idea of taken.
13
SPEAKER_00
But I just watched- Here it is.
13
SPEAKER_01
After graduating from high school in 67, Netanyahu returned to Israel to enlist in the Israeli Defense Forces.
13
SPEAKER_01
He trained as a combat soldier and served for five years in a special forces unit of the IDF.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that guy s he s yeah run up on him run up on BB Yeah, you won t even know what happened your arm will be broken and you ll be like I didn t even reach for him the crazy thing about this Israeli thing is before October 7th there was thousands of people in the streets protesting against him Thousands for like months.
13
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah, because he was trying to expand the powers of government
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, well, he s a guy where he s like, you know, you look at people that have been through war and that kind of shit They re just like they re calloused to it if I was your mother Joyous bathing light of I would have had you suckle on my teat until you were 12 years old the Madre earth and spirits of the sky Adding words I would have bathed you in crystals and
13
SPEAKER_00
I love watching videos of guys of older guys like Don Frye was one of my favorite guys when I was young To watching like pride and shit.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and then he s like it s just a true, Arizona badass So you see him now as the old man, and you re like you could still fuck shit up, but recently retired I was watching an interview with Donald Cerrone who I love it s one of my favorite.
13
SPEAKER_00
I love Donald I m from Colorado, and he s just like he s a great dude, too.
13
SPEAKER_01
He s just a fun guy He s like
13
SPEAKER_00
Bad ass yeah all the story the story told on here about cave diving gave me legitimate anxiety Listening to that.
13
SPEAKER_00
I was too high and he was talking about being lost and I was like
13
SPEAKER_00
Story was fucking insane.
13
SPEAKER_00
He was like lost and could only get back through pure darkness underwater.
13
SPEAKER_00
He s like a true American badass yeah, and he was on this podcast talking about how he got like this this idiot like ran up on him And he just head kicked him and was fucking done, and he was explaining like Doc yeah, they re at a lake, and I was watching it when I was flying to Austin and I was like I
13
SPEAKER_00
I found my genre of my favorite thing, which are people fucking around with older badasses and finding out.
13
SPEAKER_00
But this wasn t even he was older.
13
SPEAKER_00
He was active.
13
SPEAKER_00
Cerrone s a bad ass.
13
SPEAKER_00
Now, don t run up on the guy.
13
SPEAKER_01
Don t run up on him any time in his life.
13
SPEAKER_01
Ever.
13
SPEAKER_01
But this was years ago.
13
SPEAKER_00
Oh, this was when he was active in the UFC?
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he was active.
13
SPEAKER_00
What a dumb thing.
13
SPEAKER_00
These guys that think that you can beat a trained fighter
13
SPEAKER_01
They didn t know he s a train fire.
13
SPEAKER_01
They re just douchebags well guess when they got head kicked back to the wrong guy I mean imagine that s your opening move to so much stain.
13
SPEAKER_01
Do you have in this guy s ability the head kick him how much?
13
SPEAKER_00
Athleticism yeah, I can barely clip my toenails now this guy s starting with a head kick Literally what he does for a living yeah, dude.
13
SPEAKER_00
He was a guy man like
13
SPEAKER_00
You grow up in Colorado and you go to like the Western Stock Show or whatever and I was just like I m just like a pussy suburban kid, but you see these like Eastern, Colorado kids or these kids that are from like the the real front range and you re like Oh, you re a badass
13
SPEAKER_00
This is how the land got settled.
13
SPEAKER_01
He has this one KO in the UFC, this one combination where he lands on this dude where it s like the Matrix.
13
SPEAKER_01
He like, and he s just touched him.
13
SPEAKER_01
He punches him up, punches him down, face kicks him, follows up.
13
SPEAKER_01
And the way he did it was... I forget the fighter s name that he did it to.
13
SPEAKER_00
We went to... Rick Story?
13
SPEAKER_00
We went to a UFC.
13
SPEAKER_01
Is that it?
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_01
All right, boom.
13
SPEAKER_01
Hold on.
13
SPEAKER_01
Do it from the beginning.
13
SPEAKER_01
We ll get this combination.
13
SPEAKER_01
Jab to the body, left hand, ducks down, head kick.
13
SPEAKER_01
That s a full meal.
13
SPEAKER_01
Are you out of your fucking mind?
13
SPEAKER_00
That s a full meal.
13
SPEAKER_00
Are you out of your fucking mind?
13
SPEAKER_00
It s so cool.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s so cool you could do that in real life.
13
SPEAKER_00
Are you out of your fucking mind?
13
SPEAKER_00
I went to a UFC event at Barclays because Stipe Miotic was on Billions.
13
SPEAKER_00
Oh, nice.
13
SPEAKER_00
And Stipe s the man.
13
SPEAKER_00
He s like the coolest fucking guy I ve ever met.
13
SPEAKER_00
He s awesome.
13
SPEAKER_00
And his manager was like, oh, I can get you tickets to the fight that s at Barclays.
13
SPEAKER_00
Stipe wasn t on it, but Cerrone was, and I m a huge Cerrone guy.
13
SPEAKER_00
And I went with Luis J. Gomez, and we sat there, and I got so excited when Donald Cerrone knocked the dude out that Luis was like, as a friend, it bothers me how much you like this guy.
13
SPEAKER_00
It s like you want him to be your dad, and I m like no fuck that He s just like the coolest when you re like that guy s so fucking cool Lewis can t help.
13
SPEAKER_00
I love it, dude Yeah, the first event we ever went to the first live UFC event.
13
SPEAKER_00
I ever went to was Jones Sonin in Jersey chills it was like
13
SPEAKER_00
I don t think Jones had the title yet, or maybe he did, the light heavyweight, but it was Jon Jones, Chael Sonnen, and we re in the crowd.
13
SPEAKER_00
And I ve been to boxing matches, and you feel that.
13
SPEAKER_01
Jon had the light heavyweight title back then.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_00
And he was just shooting on, I mean.
13
SPEAKER_01
He beat the fuck out of Chael.
13
SPEAKER_01
He broke his toe.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he beat him up so bad he broke his own toe.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, shooting on him.
13
SPEAKER_01
He pushed off so hard off the ground while he was smashing him that you could see it in the video where it turns over.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_01
It was like an overhead shot where they see where it turns over.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
13
SPEAKER_01
I mean, he just beat the fuck out of him.
13
SPEAKER_01
And here s the thing, he didn t even know it was broken until he was talking to me.
13
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, in the ring, you looked down.
13
SPEAKER_00
I remember that, because I was in the arena.
13
SPEAKER_00
You look down and you re like, I think your toe s broken.
13
SPEAKER_00
And he was like, he hopped over to you.
13
SPEAKER_01
Bro, that s how much he wanted to fuck Chael Sonnen up.
13
SPEAKER_00
That s crazy.
13
SPEAKER_01
He just wanted to fuck him up and teach him that you do not belong in here with me.
13
SPEAKER_00
I mean, dude, Bones Jones is just a monster.
13
SPEAKER_00
He s a monster.
13
SPEAKER_01
He the thing is greatest light heavyweight of all time without question.
13
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, there s no second
14
SPEAKER_03
There s no second place.
14
SPEAKER_03
John Jones is number one for sure.
14
SPEAKER_01
Those old Nike with the open slit on the side so he can knee you.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, dude, that was wild.
14
SPEAKER_01
So we were there.
14
SPEAKER_03
Here s the thing, man.
14
SPEAKER_03
If he didn t get busted all those times and all of the things that he did, he would have Nike sponsorships.
14
SPEAKER_03
He already had one.
14
SPEAKER_01
He had one lined up.
14
SPEAKER_01
He would be the Jordan of fighting.
14
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_01
You d just be like that s how talented that guy is yeah, you re just like no It s the greatest thing you can t even argue it you can argue who comes close to him Yeah, but we were at that fight And we re watching these guys get chippy these like Jersey Italian guys just fucking yelling at this guy And it s like a dude.
14
SPEAKER_01
You know eight-mile style like a white guy being like yo what s up with the disrespect and Lewis just so casually goes and
14
SPEAKER_01
There s gonna be a fight.
14
SPEAKER_01
You should pull your phone out.
14
SPEAKER_01
Those guys are gonna fight. 
14
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, no, they re not.
14
SPEAKER_01
They re just John or whatever.
14
SPEAKER_01
And then it just, they just start fighting in the crowd.
14
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, damn, Lewis, you really felt that.
14
SPEAKER_01
He like felt it in the senses.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s like, it s about to go down.
14
SPEAKER_01
Lewis has had some fights.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, dude.
14
SPEAKER_01
I love it.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s got some crazy stories.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s told on, when I ve done podcasts with him about like growing up, he had a fucking tough life.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s why I always say people with Lewis, I go, if you had that tough of a life, there s no way you d end up how good he s done.
14
SPEAKER_01
All of us would have failed with all the hard shit because sometimes you talk to people and you re impressed by What they ve responded to and right you re like there s no way I could have responded to that
14
SPEAKER_01
Like Vladimir Putin, he s an evil guy, he s done evil shit.
14
SPEAKER_01
But you read about his childhood, that s why that lady s poem s so funny.
14
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, this guy was literally thrown in a ditch, basically, and then came up and is now the most powerful man outside of the United States.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s a fuckin  drive.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s a response that I do not have.
14
SPEAKER_01
You don t get that drive if you re the son of the king.
14
SPEAKER_01
That s exactly yeah, if you re a mom you know if you re if you re like given everything you don t have that in you No, we re like everyone left me.
14
SPEAKER_01
He was like I change rules run it again That was my favorite thing as he goes I am no longer president prime minister guess what prime minister has more power than president and after a while He goes.
14
SPEAKER_01
I m just president again
14
SPEAKER_01
The guy is just changing shit in a way that everyone around him is going like badasses.
14
SPEAKER_01
Russian badasses around him are going like, hey, that s a good one.
14
SPEAKER_01
I like that one.
14
SPEAKER_01
They just have to be agreeable.
14
SPEAKER_01
His yes, man, it s got to be a terrifying thing.
14
SPEAKER_03
Well, he s got it locked in.
14
SPEAKER_03
As long as you play by the rules, seems like he lets you live.
14
SPEAKER_01
Who do you think, that s exactly it, where he goes, I might live.
14
SPEAKER_01
Who do you think,
14
SPEAKER_03
Has the more ass kissers around them Putin or Kim Jong-un Kim Jong-un yeah, that s like crazy I bet Putin Putin s intelligent I bet Putin requires people to have different perspectives challenge so that he can take into consideration and I bet he s very strategic about what they do and why they do it and
14
SPEAKER_03
Think Kim Jong-un like that s well.
14
SPEAKER_03
He s a rich.
14
SPEAKER_01
You want to talk about a princess a king s son exactly exactly like there s the comparison But the difference is like the people of Russia are doing Way better than the people of North Korea well people from North Korea They get they like find out about stuff on the outside like when they get out, and they re like what the fuck dude So mad if you re North Korean, and you get out and you go like oh
14
SPEAKER_01
The fuck?
14
SPEAKER_01
That s a whole country like an orca tank.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah?
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_01
They re just like, no, you don t even get info from the outside.
14
SPEAKER_01
You get nothing.
14
SPEAKER_01
And when dear leader dies, you have to cry for like months.
14
SPEAKER_03
They ll put people in jail that didn t cry hard enough.
14
SPEAKER_01
If I got arrested, my grandmother passed and I loved her.
14
SPEAKER_01
If they were doing that and I didn t get arrested, I d be like, dude, I was dealing with shit.
14
SPEAKER_01
I deal with it my own way.
14
SPEAKER_01
I go inward.
14
SPEAKER_01
I think about it.
14
SPEAKER_03
I cry when I m alone.
14
SPEAKER_03
Leave the fuck alone.
14
SPEAKER_01
I had to watch Iron Claw, that wrestling movie, last night in my hotel room to jar something loose.
14
SPEAKER_03
So look, this is people that have to publicly cry.
14
SPEAKER_01
All right, listen.
14
SPEAKER_01
Can we also admit, though, when Kim Jong-il died and they did this,
14
SPEAKER_01
It is hilarious that you re that powerful, that you re like, cry harder, motherfucker.
14
SPEAKER_01
That everybody has to cry.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
14
SPEAKER_03
This is where communism leads, kids.
14
SPEAKER_03
All you fucking idiots out there that think that just no one s ever done it right, there s only one way to do it.
14
SPEAKER_03
That s this.
14
SPEAKER_03
Someone has to enforce the rules, and that person is always the military, and they have power over everything.
14
SPEAKER_01
Jamie s pointing this guy out.
14
SPEAKER_01
You think he s gone?
14
SPEAKER_01
This guy in the middle goes like, oh, fuck, I didn t know a camera was there.
14
SPEAKER_01
I didn t know a fucking camera was there.
14
SPEAKER_01
That guy s probably tortured right now.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s still being whipped.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, Kim Jong-un s it.
14
SPEAKER_01
I mean he didn t have his uncle killed Yeah, Kim Jong-un was just like when ill died.
14
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, some people are trying to move in on the territory.
14
SPEAKER_01
It s like I m the prince bitch, but also so the difference between a self-made man and a prince is that Prince has that like
14
SPEAKER_00
Let them die.
14
SPEAKER_01
Like they have that energy, where they go, my uncle has ran upon me.
14
SPEAKER_01
Like Vladimir Putin would be like, I am very disappointed that you would not think that I would take care of you.
14
SPEAKER_01
He d be like, you know, he s like, you are dead.
14
SPEAKER_00
You are dead to me.
14
SPEAKER_00
You like that prince energy?
14
SPEAKER_00
And now the sun and the stars have spoken and you have died.
14
SPEAKER_03
Dennis Rodman wants you to die.
14
SPEAKER_00
Dennis Rodman, would you like to kill my uncle?
14
SPEAKER_00
Thumbs up or down?
14
SPEAKER_00
He s like, oh.
14
SPEAKER_01
Imagine you let Dennis Rodman.
14
SPEAKER_01
Hey, what s up, man?
14
SPEAKER_01
When he s over there and he s hammered in that documentary, he s like, oh, man, you rule.
14
SPEAKER_01
When he sings him happy birthday.
14
SPEAKER_01
Wild big J. Show me that documentary it like rubbing his hands together Imagine being friends with a dictator of a country where the people are starving and you re getting drunk with that guy I m playing basketball and just hanging out and then you and then like yeah, and then you walk outside There it is.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s saying Dinner they re clapping off Do the NBA players that are there for the fat check I
14
SPEAKER_01
You know how many times have we how many times have we done gigs that have killed our soul that one s gonna feel weird The North Koreans just go like this Joe just standing there after you were a four-time all-star in the NBA and you re like oh
14
SPEAKER_03
Here s the question, do they have to lose?
14
SPEAKER_03
I mean, are they allowed to really play?
14
SPEAKER_03
Probably not.
14
SPEAKER_03
It seems like there s no competition here.
14
SPEAKER_03
This is insane to watch.
14
SPEAKER_01
I would say they give them as much pushback as that guy in the judo class did against Putin.
14
SPEAKER_02
That guy was good.
14
SPEAKER_02
No, they re not playing defense.
14
SPEAKER_01
That guy s good.
14
SPEAKER_03
Shut up, Jamie.
14
SPEAKER_03
That guy s good.
14
SPEAKER_03
No, hold on.
14
SPEAKER_02
Go back.
14
SPEAKER_02
That is a bunch of giant dudes letting a really short guy shoot a ball from very far away.
14
SPEAKER_01
Look, there s no one within 15 feet of him.
14
SPEAKER_01
Jamie, you re a hater.
14
SPEAKER_01
No, I m a basketball player.
14
SPEAKER_01
That guy s the best.
14
SPEAKER_02
Jamie s like no, I would key up on that guy and make his life So they let got all they let the Koreans get close is that what happened?
14
SPEAKER_02
I would guess they would want this to be like Harlem Globetrotters game where they want these players that they know to just beat the shit out of their you know They let Robin play with lip rings.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, this can t be real dude that story when he left in the last dance when they re talking about that bowls team and
14
SPEAKER_02
I don t know who s in charge of it, but yeah, I think they re making a movie about this whole day or two.
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh in in poignant No, Rodman going to Vegas.
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s oh dude like Billy.
14
SPEAKER_02
I think Billy Corgan talked about on this podcast.
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s nuts hmm Yeah, it s uh.
14
SPEAKER_03
I think he did too now you brought that up.
14
SPEAKER_01
He uh he just asked Phil Jackson He s like I m gonna go to Vegas Phil Jackson s like please let it be two days And it was like four
14
SPEAKER_01
There s on a run in the season.
14
SPEAKER_01
He s like I ll go to Vegas and get fucked up I m hanging out with Carmen Electra until Jackson s like Damn, you re so good being that good at something where they bend the rules for you.
14
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they go like fuck dude Alright, just go ahead.
14
SPEAKER_01
Just come back, please He s like I might not miss any games.
14
SPEAKER_01
I think he did right did he miss games Jamie?
14
SPEAKER_01
Oh
14
SPEAKER_02
I m trying to remember, the movie right now is in production.
14
SPEAKER_02
It s called 48 Hours in Vegas, but it s been in production for three years.
14
SPEAKER_01
So that s what it was, he asked.
14
SPEAKER_01
But that s not what I think he took.
14
SPEAKER_01
I think he took like four days.
14
SPEAKER_01
It was during the finals.
14
SPEAKER_03
The finals!
14
SPEAKER_02
During the finals.
14
SPEAKER_03
Oh my God, what an insane person.
14
SPEAKER_02
They usually maybe have three days off, but I think he took for two days.
14
SPEAKER_02
What?
14
SPEAKER_02
They had to go get him, as I remember.
14
SPEAKER_02
Michael Jordan, Phil Jackson, Sky Pippen all got on a plane, and we re like, you gotta come back.
14
SPEAKER_02
We have a game tomorrow.
14
SPEAKER_01
You re our leading rebounder.
14
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, that is so insane.
14
SPEAKER_03
And he s just been partying for days.
14
SPEAKER_01
Dude, it s like The Hangover meets Space Jam.
14
SPEAKER_01
We re showing up and you re like, hey, we ve got the biggest game of our life and you re here in Vegas.
14
SPEAKER_01
Vegas.
14
SPEAKER_01
Vegas.
14
SPEAKER_01
Did you ever see where ... What?
14
SPEAKER_02
Production s off a little bit, I guess.
14
SPEAKER_02
Jonathan Majors, who s had some problems this year.
14
SPEAKER_02
Oh, he was playing Rodman?
14
SPEAKER_02
He was supposed to be Rodman, yeah.
14
SPEAKER_03
Oh.
14
SPEAKER_03
Did you ever see when he was on Celebrity Rehab?
14
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, it was horrible.
14
SPEAKER_03
It was hilarious.
14
SPEAKER_03
Celebrity Rehab was like- He got in shape.
14
SPEAKER_03
All he did was run on the treadmill, drinking water.
14
SPEAKER_03
Oh, really?
14
SPEAKER_03
I was thinking of- He just partied a little too much.
14
SPEAKER_01
I think Celebrity Rehab, the one I m thinking of, is the first season where you saw people melting down in ways that you re like, what the fuck?
14
SPEAKER_03
First of all, it s the worst thing you could ever do to someone who s in the middle of recovery, is to broadcast them and all their insecurities to the world and have people shit on each other.
15
SPEAKER_02
and insult each other.
15
SPEAKER_04
What?
15
SPEAKER_04
Dr. Drew hosted that show, and it led to one of my favorite Stan Hope bits, where he said, Dr. Drew is to science.
15
SPEAKER_04
I forget what it was, but he was talking about it.
15
SPEAKER_04
He s like, that would be like being an OBGYN that only specializes in hairless, stinkless Norwegian pussy.
15
SPEAKER_04
The way that Stan Hope described it, I was like, it s so funny.
15
SPEAKER_04
Fuck I love that yeah, yeah, but celebrity rehab you just saw people be like oh, here s your favorite guy, and he s super broken Yeah, he s fucking crazy, and it gives you a window into like the dark side of Hollywood You see them be like yeah, I don t keep that money that money doesn t keep coming in That s like the Jussie Smollett thing where you re like you wonder how many of those people that are on drugs hit that moment They re like I have to do something crazy right to get back up there.
15
SPEAKER_04
I ll do celebrity rehab right I ll be the victim
15
SPEAKER_02
What do you do if you re that guy look if that guy can t work?
15
SPEAKER_04
He s got to save three babies Does he though what if it fucking rules what if it s like
15
SPEAKER_04
Wow, that d be a problem.
15
SPEAKER_04
What if we heard music and it was like?
15
SPEAKER_03
Last year as a single, but let s hear it.
15
SPEAKER_02
I mean before he got in trouble he had a bunch he had a record career Can we hear it and edit this out of the show Can we just play it for just play it for us just play in-house and who what will the audience here nothing?
15
SPEAKER_02
Overlap elevator we ll be right back with our commentary ladies and gentlemen
15
SPEAKER_03
He produced this movie about something.
15
SPEAKER_03
B-Boy Blues.
15
SPEAKER_03
It was a gay novel, 1994.
15
SPEAKER_03
Oh, it was going for that gay market.
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he s got it all.
15
SPEAKER_03
But this was also a year ago, and I was like, this is, that s the best I could think of.
15
SPEAKER_03
I would describe... He had a bunch of charting songs in 2014 and then... Oh, really?
15
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
15
SPEAKER_03
So he actually is a legitimate... He had songs on Empire that were making it big, and then that s where I was looking to around 2018.
15
SPEAKER_03
It started not charting anymore, and then 2019 is when... Is when the thing happened.
15
SPEAKER_04
The hoax problem.
15
SPEAKER_04
Is that crazy you can follow it like that?
15
SPEAKER_04
You can go like, oh, here he is, and then now you re like, it s dipping.
15
SPEAKER_04
Are we about to see something?
15
SPEAKER_04
Are we about to see a little fucking...
15
SPEAKER_04
Will I will say my review of the song is it sounds like AI R&B Mmm.
15
SPEAKER_04
It sounds like yeah, there s not one specific thing that I was like oh that was really cool He could sing for sure he could sing But it just feels like a and like right a lot of shit feels like yeah, you know what flavor of my coffee is Thanks, what?
15
SPEAKER_02
That s it
15
SPEAKER_04
Huh what okay cool.
15
SPEAKER_04
I know what you want to drink in the morning.
15
SPEAKER_04
Thanks.
15
SPEAKER_02
I don t know What s worse that or the open letter to a vote Vladimir Putin?
15
SPEAKER_04
That s the worst thing.
15
SPEAKER_04
That s one of the worst things you re dealing with a man That s a murderer, and you re writing a poem About if I was your mom I d fix it like it s also how outrageous great shit.
15
SPEAKER_02
Is she even a mom I?
15
SPEAKER_04
No, we looked it up.
15
SPEAKER_04
I think we looked it up on the bonfire.
15
SPEAKER_04
Even funnier.
15
SPEAKER_04
Makes it funnier.
15
SPEAKER_04
It is probably the best piece of shit talking we have against Vladimir Putin.
15
SPEAKER_04
Because Biden or Trump, either one of them talking shit to Putin.
15
SPEAKER_04
They won t say nothing.
15
SPEAKER_04
But this woman being like, just a self-important actress being like, I m going to tell you what I would have done.
15
SPEAKER_04
Nothing can stop hot actress energy.
15
SPEAKER_04
It was just like ...
15
SPEAKER_04
Yeah, it s an immovable object.
15
SPEAKER_03
Some mentally ill people are also hot.
15
SPEAKER_03
This is the Harvard Crimson.
15
SPEAKER_03
This is satire, buddy.
15
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
15
SPEAKER_02
White woman single-handedly stops war in Ukraine.
15
SPEAKER_02
If I was your mother.
15
SPEAKER_02
Imagine.
15
SPEAKER_02
Imagine.
15
SPEAKER_02
I mean, like, best case scenario, when you put that on TikTok, is this really does go viral.
15
SPEAKER_02
It gets to Vladimir.
15
SPEAKER_02
It gets to Vladimir, and you see him crying in the Kremlin.
15
SPEAKER_02
Someone slides it across his oversized desk.
15
SPEAKER_02
And then she gets a phone call.
15
SPEAKER_02
From Russia?
15
SPEAKER_02
What s going on?
15
SPEAKER_02
What is this?
15
SPEAKER_02
I wish you were my mother.
15
SPEAKER_02
Could you still be my mommy?
15
SPEAKER_04
She goes, who is this?
15
SPEAKER_02
And that s how he tricks her into moving to Russia.
15
SPEAKER_04
And then he s got a new bride.
15
SPEAKER_04
Yeah.
15
SPEAKER_02
She s married to me now.
15
SPEAKER_04
And that s their meet cute.
15
SPEAKER_04
That does sound like a rom-com from the 90s where it s like, she s an actress, he s a bloodthirsty dictator.
15
SPEAKER_04
What happens when a poem goes viral?
15
SPEAKER_04
It s their Sleepless in Seattle.
15
SPEAKER_02
I didn t watch the I watched small clips of the Tucker interview with Putin.
15
SPEAKER_04
Oh, what did you think it looked?
15
SPEAKER_04
I mean did you see what Putin said about it?
15
SPEAKER_04
Did he say he was like made fun of how softball of an interview it was Oh, did he really like made fun of Tucker to the Russian press he went I prepared
15
SPEAKER_04
Think the quote was something like I prepared to be challenged.
15
SPEAKER_02
Oh interesting.
15
SPEAKER_04
I was prepared for them to come at me Yeah, cuz I guess so you re right someone in his inner circle is smart because he was clearly got his balls busted for all the ranting he did
15
SPEAKER_04
Putin says he prefers Biden to Trump and mocks Tucker Carlson questions Wow which again this could all be a psyop because he s a you know How he moves in shit.
15
SPEAKER_04
I said Biden is more predictable the lack of sharp questions Yeah, it said it threw him off because you could tell someone busted his balls for how long he ranted on shit
15
SPEAKER_04
When they were like, what are you talking about?
15
SPEAKER_02
Interesting.
15
SPEAKER_04
And it said, yeah, he was he was expecting them to.
15
SPEAKER_02
But here s the other part of the quote that people aren t using.
15
SPEAKER_02
Scroll back up again.
15
SPEAKER_02
He said he goes, I think that he said between Biden and Putin, Putin said without hesitation, the current U.S.
15
SPEAKER_02
president was more experienced, predictable, an old school politician, but added, we will work with any U.S.
15
SPEAKER_02
president who the American people have confidence in.
15
SPEAKER_02
Like, why isn t, besides preferring Trump, he doesn t work with anybody.
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, but that s what I mean.
15
SPEAKER_02
He s this guy.
15
SPEAKER_02
He doesn t say unreasonable things when it comes to that.
15
SPEAKER_04
Well, he just says stuff that you go like, he says stuff that s smart enough that you go like, oh.
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
15
SPEAKER_04
Okay.
15
SPEAKER_04
Well, that s not a real, like Kim Jong-un is like, the stars have told me that I m the leader.
15
SPEAKER_04
And you re like, you re a fucking moron.
15
SPEAKER_04
And Putin says stuff and you go, I mean, it s not completely incorrect.
15
SPEAKER_02
Well, he s very intelligent.
15
SPEAKER_04
Yeah, the guy worked for the KGB.
15
SPEAKER_04
It s like a CIA operative being our leader.
15
SPEAKER_04
And they re like, hey, I know how these fucking things go.
15
SPEAKER_02
Have you ever seen when he talks about how many U.S.
15
SPEAKER_02
presidents he s been through and about how they all have these promises?
15
SPEAKER_02
And then once they get into office he goes men with coats like mine sit down with them not with this color tie You know yeah, and they tell them exactly what you re going to do like it s cool to see because He s telling the truth.
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he knows what he says on the other side of it He s on the other side of it, but it s not a lie.
15
SPEAKER_02
No like it s and we all know that and
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, Obama, one of his things was to help whistleblowers.
15
SPEAKER_02
It was like a part of the website to get him elected.
15
SPEAKER_02
It s like protection for whistleblowers.
15
SPEAKER_02
They were like the worst for whistleblowers.
15
SPEAKER_04
Dude, I m telling you, he knows that all presidents
15
SPEAKER_04
Left or right are just yeah, this is the same arms.
15
SPEAKER_04
They have the arms to the same monster.
15
SPEAKER_04
Yeah, he knows how they work That s what he means by Biden s a predictable when he goes I could fucking it s like knowing how to drive an old car Saying that those Chinese weather balloons those flying over things those big balloons Yeah, they were doing that when Trump was around, but they didn t tell Trump.
15
SPEAKER_02
That s hilarious.
15
SPEAKER_02
He s Trump would like shoot him down
15
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s fine, but if Trump shot down like he s fucking launching missiles into the sky well they threatened World War that s always the threat either side pushes on the other where they go like World War three is coming You ever see the dude who tells the story to the news about the missile that?
15
SPEAKER_02
or the the jet that crash-landed
15
SPEAKER_02
Have you seen this?
15
SPEAKER_04
No.
15
SPEAKER_02
There was a jet or a pilot ejected from the jet, like some fucking super expensive fighter jet, and it flew into the ground, and this one dude was there when it happened.
15
SPEAKER_02
This dude s like super country.
15
SPEAKER_02
I love it.
15
SPEAKER_02
It s hilarious.
15
SPEAKER_00
I had a chance to talk to a man who lives out here.
15
SPEAKER_00
He told me he actually heard the plane as it was flying past his house and crashing nearby, but he didn t know what it was.
15
SPEAKER_00
I m almost ...
15
SPEAKER_01
October the 6th, I ll be 72 years old.
15
SPEAKER_04
I do.
15
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
15
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
15
SPEAKER_00
Georgetown 10 years ago.
15
SPEAKER_00
He lives in this house with his wife in a very rural area of Williamsburg County.
15
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s nice and quiet and peaceful and I don t, I don t have to worry about people.
15
SPEAKER_01
No close up tight.
15
SPEAKER_01
You know, I like space.
15
SPEAKER_00
I like living about two miles away from where he grew up.
15
SPEAKER_01
Normally it s pretty quiet, but on Sunday afternoon I was in the, uh, in the bathroom taking a shave.
15
SPEAKER_04
I thought that was gonna go a different way.
15
SPEAKER_01
Between a screech and a whistle.
15
SPEAKER_01
I said, what in the world is this?
15
SPEAKER_04
Pause that.
15
SPEAKER_04
I need that as a clip.
15
SPEAKER_04
I need that as someone to cut that clip where he just goes, what in the world is this?
15
SPEAKER_02
I think people have already sampled it in rap songs.
15
SPEAKER_01
I said, what in the world is this?
15
SPEAKER_02
That s a fucking mean drop.
15
SPEAKER_00
White says he didn t realize it was a plane at the time, so he didn t call anybody.
15
SPEAKER_01
I said, what s this, a meteorite coming out of space or something?
15
SPEAKER_01
And I said, well, if
16
SPEAKER_02
I love he doesn t put it together the f-35
16
SPEAKER_03
Damn, dude, that is possibly.
16
SPEAKER_03
I love the beginning of the interview where he goes, I ve been out on this earth about 72 years.
16
SPEAKER_02
I just love that guy that states how old he is at the beginning.
16
SPEAKER_02
With a straw hat on.
16
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he goes, I ain t seen no shit.
16
SPEAKER_02
In the country.
16
SPEAKER_03
But I m having a shave, which is definitely code for a shit.
16
SPEAKER_03
He was taking a dump in that plane crash.
16
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I m taking a shave.
16
SPEAKER_02
I said, what in the world is this?
16
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
16
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, dude, that s not good rules.
16
SPEAKER_00
What if it was a cover story for a crashed UFO?
16
SPEAKER_00
That s what I mean I mean, that s I want his explanation on you if it goes tiny little gray men they seem mean I think they lost the jet though They knew the guy ejected from the jet and they lost the jet It was reported that the jet was lost before this guy reported and they found out where it where it slammed Yeah, because I remember reading that news story about a lost jet and you re like how the fuck do you lose a jet?
16
SPEAKER_01
He s also wearing a weighted vest.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that guy s probably got low body fat under there.
16
SPEAKER_03
Is that what that is?
16
SPEAKER_00
Guy s probably shredded.
16
SPEAKER_00
S-P-R-I.
16
SPEAKER_03
He s working out.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_00
Maybe he s like a dude who s just out there, works out all the time.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
He s taking off, he s just shredded.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, just old man ripped.
16
SPEAKER_03
He s like an old Rambo.
16
SPEAKER_00
Have you ever seen those old dudes that work out in the park on those monkey bars and- Yeah, dude, up in Harlem?
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and the gymnast bars, the various different height parallel bars.
16
SPEAKER_00
I did this.
16
SPEAKER_00
These guys are insanely fit, dude.
16
SPEAKER_00
And there s this one old dude that does it on Instagram that I follow.
16
SPEAKER_03
Well, I ve met, back when I was getting out of the waiting tables days, this was about 12, 13 years ago, I did a series for Yahoo called Mansome, which sounds so good.
16
SPEAKER_03
But it was, they would have me do different weird shit or whatever, and I went up to Harlem and did an episode with these guys.
16
SPEAKER_03
And they were like showing me the shit they could do.
16
SPEAKER_03
And it was unbelievable, like, oh, there it is.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, the bartenders.
16
SPEAKER_00
Look at you, bro.
16
SPEAKER_03
Dude, I am full alcoholic at this point.
16
SPEAKER_03
Very hungover.
16
SPEAKER_03
Dude, this guy would do stuff.
16
SPEAKER_03
He would do, and then I would try to do stuff, and I m out of shape, so my arms are doing stabilizers.
16
SPEAKER_03
They can do insane shit.
16
SPEAKER_03
They do flagpoles.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, he would lift himself all the way up, and then all the way back down with not even breathing it.
16
SPEAKER_00
Just try doing the monkey bars back and forth a couple of times and see how hard it is on your forearms and your grip strength.
16
SPEAKER_03
Especially at 40?
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
Like look at this, they can just do stuff.
16
SPEAKER_00
But that is, it just shows you also, like, their physiques come from, entirely from body weight.
16
SPEAKER_00
And you, like, look at gymnasts.
16
SPEAKER_00
They re some of the most fuckin  ripped people alive, and it s just all body weight.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, it s no weight lifting.
16
SPEAKER_03
It s just that, pull-ups.
16
SPEAKER_03
How hard, look at that.
16
SPEAKER_00
That s crazy.
16
SPEAKER_00
Crazy muscle ups, flips.
16
SPEAKER_03
Parkour guys are crazy strong.
16
SPEAKER_03
To have that kind of control.
16
SPEAKER_00
Oh, for sure, for sure.
16
SPEAKER_00
Now I could do that if I got up there.
16
SPEAKER_00
I wouldn t do that.
16
SPEAKER_03
I could flip around.
16
SPEAKER_00
If you fall, you re fucked.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, especially at 40.
16
SPEAKER_00
I d fucking take a fall and be like, ooh.
16
SPEAKER_00
I think they have a rubber floor there, it looks like, which is nice.
16
SPEAKER_00
It ll help you a little bit.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_00
But still, not good.
16
SPEAKER_03
Being out of shape and trying to do that in front of them.
16
SPEAKER_00
Those are just like little liability places.
16
SPEAKER_00
There s so much liability in there.
16
SPEAKER_03
I would like to know the insurance on city playgrounds, like the legalities of what they have to be like, you re not suing us.
16
SPEAKER_00
And is there some stuff that s grandfathered in, like those domes?
16
SPEAKER_00
Those iron domes?
16
SPEAKER_00
Those thunder domes?
16
SPEAKER_00
They re like monkey bar domes.
16
SPEAKER_00
Those are the shit.
16
SPEAKER_00
It drips all around.
16
SPEAKER_00
You d be inside of them and shit.
16
SPEAKER_00
Fall.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
Dude, I used to go this place in Denver when I was a kid called big fun And it was like a Discovery Zone kind of thing, but they had these rubber straps It was called the spiderweb and it was these tight thick like that wide that thick across but like dozens of them all the way up and you would climb through and
16
SPEAKER_03
Disaster when you fall you back you like go through these like Straps slapping you in the back of the neck you would come back with like lacerations on your arms and shit It s the most fun.
16
SPEAKER_03
I ve ever had and there s zero chance.
16
SPEAKER_03
They would do that now Just rubber straps and be like climb to the top.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there s like a good 20 feet tall You know they don t have still to that.
16
SPEAKER_00
I m kind of shocked.
16
SPEAKER_00
They still have is those trampoline buildings Those are going them, and it s just trampolines everywhere and everyone s just bouncing from one trampoline to the next one yeah fuck
16
SPEAKER_03
Dude this guy very funny comic Damien that opens he s open for me.
16
SPEAKER_03
He used to do slam ball Yeah, they brought it back, but now they do it with contact or I think you used to be able to do it What a wild idea to have basketball with trampolines.
16
SPEAKER_03
It sounds good on paper, but your knees are like dude I can t do this
16
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah, it s gotta be terrible.
16
SPEAKER_00
Like you land wrong?
16
SPEAKER_03
Oh, yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
I wonder if it s almost easier to land on a hard floor.
16
SPEAKER_00
I bet you have to do everything totally different, because you have two different things going on.
16
SPEAKER_00
You got trampoline jumping, and then you have running on a court.
16
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_00
You re going back and forth to both of these things.
16
SPEAKER_00
It s probably really hard to do yeah go from But is it actually better to see people fly through the air like that they can do crazy.
16
SPEAKER_03
I mean Yeah, they get to do crazy crazy dunks yeah, but you can t even dribble in the center Yeah, you know what I have to though right like how much traveling happens well They take as many steps as NBA players do now that you re o3 star and
16
SPEAKER_03
What are you allowed it s like a lot of they call it a euro step or you re basically allowed what three steps?
16
SPEAKER_01
I think it s the NBA apparently there s like a two and a half step rule is a gather step dribble that people can go like one two and then run There s a few guys on Instagram that break down these crazy plays and be like this is not a travel and here s why they take five minutes in slow motion to show you why it wasn t
16
SPEAKER_03
I got here crazy early, and I was on my phone in my car watching highlights of this dude on Twitter that they re starting to call him Cream Cream Abdul Jabbar he s a white guy from Indiana State this this reporter Matt Ross called him cream up cream Abdul Jabbar And he s a white guy from Indiana State.
16
SPEAKER_03
Let me see what his name is I think I have it still up on my phone.
16
SPEAKER_03
Oh Yeah, dude.
16
SPEAKER_03
He rules his name is Robbie Avila, and he s like I
16
SPEAKER_03
When you see this guy, you re like, oh, he s just a big, fat white guy with glasses.
16
SPEAKER_03
And then he just balls.
16
SPEAKER_03
Really?
16
SPEAKER_03
He just balls out, and he s at Indiana State.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I love it.
16
SPEAKER_03
I love a goofy white guy.
16
SPEAKER_03
There he is.
16
SPEAKER_00
That s him?
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
This guy had 35 points last night.
16
SPEAKER_03
What?
16
SPEAKER_03
He s just putting it up.
16
SPEAKER_03
Really?
16
SPEAKER_03
Let me see some highlight.
16
SPEAKER_03
This guy can fucking go.
16
SPEAKER_03
He plays like he s playing with kids.
16
SPEAKER_03
That s how he kind of looks sometimes.
16
SPEAKER_03
He s right there down on the key, right there, yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
Up and in and he just looks like if he showed up at the playground like you d be like he s probably not that good And then he just fucks shit up those goggles are fresh, too.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, dude.
16
SPEAKER_03
I love it He s got those old-school Kurt Rambis glasses on yeah, I love a guy that has Horace Grant up top Those glasses probably help
16
SPEAKER_03
Oh yeah, it s like Ricky Vaughn in Major League.
16
SPEAKER_03
You can finally see the strike zone.
16
SPEAKER_00
You can really see everything.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, but look, he can dish.
16
SPEAKER_03
Wow.
16
SPEAKER_03
I love a goofy, big, white guy that s great at basketball.
16
SPEAKER_03
That s why I love Jokic on the Nuggets so much.
16
SPEAKER_03
He just looks like he should not be good, and he s awesome.
16
SPEAKER_03
Wow.
16
SPEAKER_01
He s not trying.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
He moves slow in that way where you re like.
16
SPEAKER_03
But he s precise.
16
SPEAKER_03
But he s just like.
16
SPEAKER_00
Larry Bird.
16
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
16
SPEAKER_03
Larry Bird you re like.
16
SPEAKER_03
And also Larry Bird is they say arguably the greatest shit talker of all time.
16
SPEAKER_03
That he was like other tier level of shit talking.
16
SPEAKER_03
He would apparently show up to like remember when they had those free throw competitions, and he said this was coming in second Oh, yeah, he said that at the all-star game for the three-point competition because who s gonna be in second place there was one And I don t really know how true this story is but list you know Joe list is a huge Celtics fan huge Boston sports guy He told me a story that Larry Bird
16
SPEAKER_03
It was like the 86 season and they were he was lined up on a guy and Larry Bird hit three shots in a row They call a timeout and he comes back on the court.
16
SPEAKER_03
He tells the guy he goes Can you believe they re gonna give the ball to McHale?
16
SPEAKER_03
I just scored six straight points on you and they re giving the ball to McHale and the guy went what and then the play happens and McHale scored and the bird looked at him was like I told you
16
SPEAKER_03
Like, he s just so good, he s like, yeah, I m not getting the ball and I m mad about it.
16
SPEAKER_03
This guy is.
16
SPEAKER_03
He s like, you gotta be so good to be able to talk it.
16
SPEAKER_01
LeBron tells the players on the other team what they re doing wrong sometimes.
16
SPEAKER_01
Really?
16
SPEAKER_01
He s like, you re supposed to be over here.
16
SPEAKER_03
That s wild.
16
SPEAKER_01
You re like, hey, move.
16
SPEAKER_01
He knows what everybody s doing.
16
SPEAKER_01
His basketball knowledge is at a level so far above everybody else on the floor.
16
SPEAKER_01
Most coaches also.
16
SPEAKER_03
Wow.
16
SPEAKER_03
What I love is in sports where someone calls something out in the middle of a play.
16
SPEAKER_03
There s two examples in the NFL that I know where Peyton Manning gets mad at his tackle for missing a block and he s running.
16
SPEAKER_03
When he s on the Colts and you can hear him go, God damn it.
16
SPEAKER_03
He yells the guy s name in the middle
17
SPEAKER_01
of the play and still has the play done, but he like in the middle of the play goes like, you fucked up and like screams it out.
17
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking hilarious.
17
SPEAKER_01
One of the best versions of that.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
Max Holloway was fighting Brian Ortega.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
And he told Brian Ortega, you got to block like this.
17
SPEAKER_01
He puts his hand up to help him block.
17
SPEAKER_01
In the middle of beating his ass, he takes his hand, he goes, put your hand right here.
17
SPEAKER_01
I mean, dude, that, that, that moment.
17
SPEAKER_01
You need to see this, watch.
17
SPEAKER_01
Look, watch this.
17
SPEAKER_01
Look, he puts his, see, he s teaching him how to do it.
17
SPEAKER_00
That s so funny.
17
SPEAKER_01
He said, look, look, look, protect me.
17
SPEAKER_01
Look, see?
17
SPEAKER_01
Watch this.
17
SPEAKER_01
Look at this, man.
17
SPEAKER_01
Bro, put your hand there.
17
SPEAKER_00
And he did, like, the demonstration, like, I won t even do it to you.
17
SPEAKER_01
And then he beats his ass more.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s just such a nice guy.
17
SPEAKER_00
Wild.
17
SPEAKER_00
That was like when Khabib got Connor in the corner and was talking to him.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_00
Let s talk now.
17
SPEAKER_00
Let s talk now.
17
SPEAKER_00
Let s talk now.
17
SPEAKER_00
You re like just getting elbows hammered on you and you re like.
17
SPEAKER_00
Fucking wild.
17
SPEAKER_00
Wild.
17
SPEAKER_00
It s a wild sport, man.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_00
Those guys are bad asses.
17
SPEAKER_00
Unreal.
17
SPEAKER_01
That s a different kind of human being.
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
17
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Kind of human being that can do that successfully for a living.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
It s a big one coming up soon in Miami.
17
SPEAKER_00
Big fucking card.
17
SPEAKER_00
You excited?
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s a big one.
17
SPEAKER_01
There s one fight.
17
SPEAKER_01
I m really excited about Dustin Poirier versus Benoit Sainte-Denis, okay?
17
SPEAKER_01
Benoit Sainte-Denis was a French special forces guy who now fights in MMA and is Murkin people like he s a straight-up killer.
17
SPEAKER_00
I mean he looked at that chest tattoo is yeah fucking tough
17
SPEAKER_01
He there was one of the fights that I Called and I m interviewing him afterwards and he starts talking about I like America you helped us out during World War two very much for bringing us back He s talking about America in terms of like military like that.
17
SPEAKER_01
We ve always been kind of aligned.
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and I m like, that s how he s thinking Yeah, he s that s a problem.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s a killer.
17
SPEAKER_01
He got into MMA to be better as a soldier and
17
SPEAKER_01
I think he already had a judo background, but the MMA thing is fairly recent.
17
SPEAKER_01
It s only been like six years, I believe, or so.
17
SPEAKER_00
He s 13.
17
SPEAKER_00
I saw his record.
17
SPEAKER_00
He s 13 and 1.
17
SPEAKER_00
He s called the God of War?
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_00
That s badass.
17
SPEAKER_00
As a fan of God of War, that s badass.
17
SPEAKER_01
I think the fight he lost was at a different weight class, too.
17
SPEAKER_01
I think he fights at 155, and I m pretty sure, should check on that, I m pretty sure his fight that he lost was at 170.
17
SPEAKER_01
But he s very good, man.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s very good.
17
SPEAKER_01
And he s calculated, and he doesn t have any weaknesses.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s very good on the ground.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s very good standing up.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s just good everywhere.
17
SPEAKER_00
If he wins that fight, does that elevate him to a shot at the title?
17
SPEAKER_01
Boy, it s a big jump.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s a big jump in competition.
17
SPEAKER_01
This guy goes from beating guys who are pretty good, good fighters, solid fighters, to the top of the heap, Dustin Poirier, a guy who s been interim champion.
17
SPEAKER_01
It s a different level.
17
SPEAKER_01
And for Dustin to accept that fight, it s a big risk.
17
SPEAKER_01
And Dustin must have got paid a lot of money to do that, because that s a... That s crazy.
17
SPEAKER_01
St.
17
SPEAKER_01
Denis is favored over Dustin Poirier.
17
SPEAKER_01
Dustin Poirier, who has fought fucking everybody.
17
SPEAKER_01
Everybody.
17
SPEAKER_01
The guy beats Conor twice, and he s still the underdog against St.
17
SPEAKER_01
Denis.
17
SPEAKER_01
That s how scary that dude is.
17
SPEAKER_00
I like that Michael Page is fighting in the UFC.
17
SPEAKER_00
Kevin Hall and Michael Page.
17
SPEAKER_00
Michael Page is fun.
17
SPEAKER_00
I know Michael Page from the, like, he s fun, dude.
17
SPEAKER_01
That s a real fight.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
That s a real fight, because Kevin Holland is fucking dangerous.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
He s fucking dangerous, and he s got a lot of MMA experience.
17
SPEAKER_01
A lot.
17
SPEAKER_01
And he s very good on the ground, and he s got ridiculous one-punch power.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
And that s also a welterweight fight, where Kevin, I think, is at his most dangerous.
17
SPEAKER_01
At 170, Kevin is so fucking dangerous.
17
SPEAKER_01
Spinning back elbows and shit like I know Michael page from watching like his highlights if you go to Michael page Michael venom page before he was ever an MMA fighter was a high-level karate point fighter And I was always wondering like when are those guys going to make their way into MMA because we had this one guy Raymond Daniels who was also an opponent of Michael venom page in a karate thing and
17
SPEAKER_01
But there s a video you can watch of that of them competing in a karate tournament.
17
SPEAKER_01
Those high-level karate guys can move in and out very fast.
17
SPEAKER_00
Is that what their superpower you would say is?
17
SPEAKER_00
It s a blitz.
17
SPEAKER_00
They re just crazy in and out and can nail you with shit.
17
SPEAKER_01
They can cover distance much faster than everybody else because their game is all about touching you once Yeah, so it s just it s it s like you re you re playing a game of karate tag.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s probably The funniest name to call it though.
17
SPEAKER_00
It kind of is like that like to make it sound safer You go you wanna play karate tag?
17
SPEAKER_00
You just get kicked in the fucking head.
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but you don t most of the times guys don t even get knocked out They just get touched
17
SPEAKER_01
You know it s a lot of like this like this kind of thing and then when someone does touch make contact they separate And they call point now is based on the very ludicrous notion that one strike could kill someone okay?
17
SPEAKER_01
And so you wouldn t want to be hitting anybody more than once yeah, you could do what one hitter quitter shot
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, so this is like based you know they started these tournaments based on that idea a long-ass time ago And they keep doing them that way But the skill that you get from that is the ability to close the distance and hit someone look at that crazy jumping wheel kick You did yeah, that was a three 720 degree wheel kick look at this That s crazy if you re in a street fight right and you see a guy Take a karate stance.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there is a chance.
17
SPEAKER_00
He s gonna hit you with one of those I
17
SPEAKER_01
Most likely.
17
SPEAKER_00
That s a one hitter where you take that shot.
17
SPEAKER_01
But if you re a wrestler, you go, oh, this is gonna be great.
17
SPEAKER_01
This is gonna be great.
17
SPEAKER_01
You re gonna kick me.
17
SPEAKER_01
Okay, let me time this.
17
SPEAKER_01
And then I ll just.
17
SPEAKER_01
I m gonna tackle you on the concrete fuck face.
17
SPEAKER_00
That s why that Dagestanian wrestling thing.
17
SPEAKER_01
Wrestling is the number one foundation of all martial arts.
17
SPEAKER_01
I think if you don t know how to wrestle, you can t fight.
17
SPEAKER_01
You have to know how to wrestle.
17
SPEAKER_01
Even the high level kickboxers, like, you okay, bro?
17
SPEAKER_01
What happened?
17
SPEAKER_01
You son of a bitch that s COVID it s COVID it s the new COVID Give it to me even guys like Like Alex Pejeta who s one of the most devastating strikers to ever fight in the sport He had to learn how to wrestle before he could fight in MMA Yeah, you can t just go in there and not know how to get up You can t go in there and not know how to defend yourself.
17
SPEAKER_00
It s just too dangerous I remember the old school when they did James Tony Randy Couture.
17
SPEAKER_00
Oh
17
SPEAKER_00
Randy Couture was like, well, I m not going to stand with you.
17
SPEAKER_01
Randy Couture was like, you can t wrestle at all.
17
SPEAKER_01
Randy ankle picked him, which is embarrassing.
17
SPEAKER_01
He just dropped down and grabbed his ankle, like sit your ass down.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, dude, he didn t even let him have a shot.
17
SPEAKER_00
That was fun to watch.
17
SPEAKER_01
Randy was actually nice to him.
17
SPEAKER_01
He could have tortured him.
17
SPEAKER_01
He could have proven a point and just stayed on him and punched him in the face as long as he wanted to.
17
SPEAKER_00
But that s why I liked Khabib.
17
SPEAKER_00
Because Khabib just did that to the top guys that could wrestle.
17
SPEAKER_00
Guys that could wrestle were like... It was like watching someone fight a shark and get brought into the water.
17
SPEAKER_00
And you re like, he s just got you.
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I mean, that s what Poirier said about him.
17
SPEAKER_01
I just couldn t believe he was doing that to him.
17
SPEAKER_00
I mean, can you imagine that?
17
SPEAKER_00
You re just so good that guys at the top level are like, I can t even fuck with this guy.
17
SPEAKER_01
Getting mauled by this dude.
17
SPEAKER_01
And he s talking to you.
17
SPEAKER_01
And Poirier tried for a guillotine at one point in time and almost had it.
17
SPEAKER_00
Remember that?
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
It was pretty tight.
17
SPEAKER_00
I watched that.
17
SPEAKER_01
Poirier has a nasty guillotine.
17
SPEAKER_00
Was that fight in...
17
SPEAKER_00
London or it was I think I remember watching why do I remember watching it in the afternoon?
17
SPEAKER_00
I do not know, but I remember watching that you re like.
17
SPEAKER_00
Oh, he s got no he does Oh, it s just in case was that the last fight Gagey Gagey was the last fight well with Gagey Did he catch Khabib in a something?
17
SPEAKER_01
I think he tried something and then all of a sudden a guillotine was a Gagey am I?
17
SPEAKER_01
Remembering it wrong.
17
SPEAKER_01
I thought it was Dustin Poirier almost had a guillotine
17
SPEAKER_00
You probably know more than I do.
17
SPEAKER_01
I just remember... I get them confused, though, too.
17
SPEAKER_00
...being high helium in Philadelphia during the day, and they re like, we ll put the fight on here.
17
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, that d be awesome.
17
SPEAKER_00
Walk over from the hotel.
17
SPEAKER_01
The story was that he actually likes Gaichi.
17
SPEAKER_01
Poirier.
17
SPEAKER_01
It was Poirier.
17
SPEAKER_00
It was Poirier.
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
So here it is.
17
SPEAKER_01
He gets him in a guillotine.
17
SPEAKER_01
This is pretty fucking tight, dude.
17
SPEAKER_01
It s pretty fucking tight.
17
SPEAKER_01
And it would have been much better if he had that right knee engaged.
17
SPEAKER_01
See how Khabib just steps over that right knee?
17
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
17
SPEAKER_01
He just alleviated a lot of pressure there.
17
SPEAKER_01
But there s still a tremendous amount of pressure on his neck.
17
SPEAKER_01
But the key thing here is Dustin tried to scramble and re-engage, but he never got that right knee in play.
17
SPEAKER_01
Khabib kept that right knee from being in play every time.
17
SPEAKER_01
See how he pushed it down and gets sideways?
17
SPEAKER_01
That alleviates the pressure from the hips.
17
SPEAKER_01
So now the hips aren t squeezing down on your lower back anymore, which accentuates the pressure on the hips.
17
SPEAKER_00
And now he s out.
17
SPEAKER_01
Now he s out.
17
SPEAKER_01
It was the whole key to that, if he was in full guard there- Look at how scary it is.
17
SPEAKER_00
Then all of a sudden he s on his back and he s just like, shit.
17
SPEAKER_01
Shit, well, that s the that s the problem pulling guard for you right here, right?
17
SPEAKER_01
And then he just switches over goes over and now he s just gone as a bad Also, Dustin needs to take a break here.
17
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he just exerted an insane amount of energy trying to close the deal So when you re trying to close the deal on a guillotine your whole body is involved Yeah, and you re arcing into it and you know, and he didn t have the leg man and then it s just oh
17
SPEAKER_01
He didn t have that leg if he had that right leg over and that s why it could be that was his number one priority Wasn t even defending the choke if you notice the number one priority is moving over that right leg Yeah, it got over him because as soon as someone has a guillotine like Dustin does and they have two legs and you re really trapped It might be night-night Yeah, it might be night-night because they re pulling down on your lower back and then they re up on your neck and twisting it to the side
18
SPEAKER_01
I d be trying to talk.
18
SPEAKER_00
I d be like, stop.
18
SPEAKER_00
You can t even get hands involved.
18
SPEAKER_01
You re just fucksville.
18
SPEAKER_00
Please leave me alone.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s what I was saying last night where you get choked and it changes your voice and you go like... That s just how fucking good Khabib was, man.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s so good.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s almost a tragedy that he never wants to fight again.
18
SPEAKER_01
Because he doesn t, right?
18
SPEAKER_01
It was like the promise he made his dad.
18
SPEAKER_01
It s beautiful.
18
SPEAKER_01
He s made his mother.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s going to have one more fight and that s what s going to be it.
18
SPEAKER_00
And it s beautiful.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s a great way to go out.
18
SPEAKER_01
And he was just a badass coach.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yep, and he ll be one of the greatest coaches of all time, and he ll go out as without a doubt one of the greatest to ever do it Yeah, one of the greatest pound for pound if not the best ever he s definitely in the argument There s the argument is Mighty Mouse who s always had a special place in my heart for when he was in his prime Yeah, when he was in his prime Mighty Mouse was a motherfucker to watch he would do shit that no one could do he would do shit
18
SPEAKER_00
where he would throw a guy into the air, suplex him, and then catch an arm bar in the middle of him being in the air.
18
SPEAKER_00
I just saw that clip.
18
SPEAKER_00
And finish it on the ground.
18
SPEAKER_00
I just saw the flying arm bar.
18
SPEAKER_00
There s not a champion alive.
18
SPEAKER_00
that can do that the way Mighty Mouse did.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you like toss the guy in the air and then on his way down threw him in an arm bar when they both hit the mat.
18
SPEAKER_00
Bro, when he fought Henry Cejudo the first time, it was a masterclass.
18
SPEAKER_00
It was a masterclass.
18
SPEAKER_00
When you put Henry away.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, when you re- This is his last fight.
18
SPEAKER_00
That was the fight with the fly.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s a great fight too, though.
18
SPEAKER_00
Show that KO, because it s a flying knee.
18
SPEAKER_00
And this is a guy who had knocked him out in the previous fight with a knee.
18
SPEAKER_00
So check this out.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at this combination.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at that fucking timing, dude.
18
SPEAKER_00
And walk away.
18
SPEAKER_00
Walk away.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at that timing, man.
18
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
18
SPEAKER_01
When you re watching this, Cage Side, and you see a guy like Mighty Mouse do some wild shit, are you just like, as a fan of the sport,
18
SPEAKER_01
You re calling it, but you re just like it does it take your brain a little bit to process like what?
18
SPEAKER_00
It s so magical.
18
SPEAKER_00
It s like I know how hard it is to move that way so when I see a dude who can move the way he does I m like that is so fucking beautiful
18
SPEAKER_00
So for someone who does martial arts, yeah, look at this.
18
SPEAKER_00
Flying arm bar.
18
SPEAKER_00
This is against Ray Borg.
18
SPEAKER_00
So in the middle of the suplex, he catches the arm before the dude hits the ground.
18
SPEAKER_00
Before the dude hits the ground, he caught the arm.
18
SPEAKER_00
And then he swings over and get, now he s having fun here.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s having fun.
18
SPEAKER_00
For him to do this, he s like, I m going to show off.
18
SPEAKER_00
And if you know Demetrius, he s a fun dude.
18
SPEAKER_00
He plays a lot of video games and streams and stuff.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s a really sweetheart of a guy you would never imagine to be that good.
18
SPEAKER_01
He had a German suplex He was just lighting this dude on fire like he was just lighting the fire he s at I Maintain that he is the finest expression of martial arts.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I ve ever seen cuz it s creative and
18
SPEAKER_00
It s it s it s just he didn t have the kind of competition and the men aren t as big but if he was welterweight He would be no question the greatest of all time.
18
SPEAKER_00
No question.
18
SPEAKER_00
He was so good, dude Yeah, you gotta look at them when they re in this window of time and
18
SPEAKER_00
And sometimes it s just a few years where they re accomplishing things in a way that is so extraordinary, you go, I ve never seen anybody better.
18
SPEAKER_00
And that s how I feel about Mighty Mouse when he was in his prime.
18
SPEAKER_00
And then the other one that s like that is Anderson Silva.
18
SPEAKER_00
In his prime all the defenses the title defenses that run it was a way he was doing it to man It was like he was operating at a different speed than them.
18
SPEAKER_00
He was processing things with a 2024 computer and they were using Windows 95 the way he would dodge punches all the time and then I also loved
18
SPEAKER_01
He was part of the reason I wrote that joke about translators in the ring afterwards because his voice was so soft and he was like Portuguese maybe like Anderson says he ll kill all comers and anyone and you re like, but his voice is so sweet.
18
SPEAKER_01
His voice was like
18
SPEAKER_00
When he when he beat Rich Franklin to win the title yeah, hey isn t it Yeah, ace rich or rich ace Franklin.
18
SPEAKER_01
You look like Ace Ventura a little bit Those are my mushroom days where I just take a ton of mushrooms and watch UFC Oh, dude, it was dude I got robbed
18
SPEAKER_01
When I lived in Tucson because I lived with a weed dealer And I got fucking hogtied like gone on 45 on the head like cleaned out I did the whole story on Ari s it was the season Ari got fired But this is not happening, but I lived with a weed guy, and we got set up, and I was just a roommate How hard they hit you in the head?
18
SPEAKER_01
Not hard I had to pretend that it was harder because the guy was like smaller than me So I had to pretend that he really fucked my shit up when really he just kind of dinked me And then he was I mean he was a pro like he had a army duffel bag zip ties Had like a real gun like like I had a cheap one guy was two guys Got both me and my roommate, and they you know they knew we were college kids both guns
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah hammers dude 45s.
18
SPEAKER_01
I think think both of them had 45 caliber like he was tapping it on my head being like you re gonna fucking die white boy Where s the fucking money and you re like?
18
SPEAKER_01
I don t fucking know and then So I got robbed and then I got out of it or whatever I was fine.
18
SPEAKER_01
I wasn t physically hurt They took my car which had six loads of laundry in it, so I lost all my clothes and
18
SPEAKER_01
That sucked living wearing a bathing suit as underwear for three days because I was so broke.
18
SPEAKER_01
I couldn t afford anything I lost my CD booklet Jerry at the car back.
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah cleaned out Where was it in the desert?
18
SPEAKER_01
That s what happens in Tucson It s all happened in Tucson and they called me and they re like we got your car, and I was like is my seat I was at a bar and Tucson police called me and they go we found your car And I go was the CD booklet in it and the guy goes no oh
18
SPEAKER_00
It s like you look we found your fucking car.
18
SPEAKER_00
That s the thing we used to carry CD books in our car.
18
SPEAKER_01
I had a zip one Dude, I had pages of man shit.
18
SPEAKER_01
I had a whole Soundgarden page Nirvana page with bleach all the way to fucking Dude, and you to keep the you d keep the CD thing for inside so it looked professional, right?
18
SPEAKER_01
Did I had a banger of a CD booklet that got taken but then that night today?
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re just like not digital I won t own my media, but we went I went to my buddy Sumner s house, and I took like probably three and a half close to four grams, and I was drunk before I took it oh boy and Mark was sober and he let me in and we watched the first season of The Ultimate Fighter
18
SPEAKER_01
And we had it on like did you get robbed while you re watching no?
18
SPEAKER_01
This is that night, but it was like hyping me up, or I was like maybe I would have pulled I was on mushrooms Maybe I would have pulled shit, but I was like oh, and then we watched that to like 5 in the morning But I was just tripping being like watch it.
18
SPEAKER_01
I was like watching UFC on mushrooms for
18
SPEAKER_01
cool so I did it a couple more times and I was thinking the last time I did it was like Lesnar Shane Carwin oh wow cuz I was like oh he s from Colorado I always loved Colorado fighters that was the closest Shane had come I mean he really came close to beating that guy yeah that was on top of him was pounded him
18
SPEAKER_01
I was drunk at Hooters with Lewis.
18
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that s I was drunk at a Midtown Hooters with Lewis cuz I was yelling out Aurora and then fucking Shane Carlin lost and I was like Cuz he gassed out he gassed out that was it he emptied the tank trying to finish Brock because he wobbled him
18
SPEAKER_00
He was on top of him, raining bombs down on him.
18
SPEAKER_00
A lot of referees would have stopped that fight.
18
SPEAKER_01
Really?
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
18
SPEAKER_00
Watch it.
18
SPEAKER_00
Watch it.
18
SPEAKER_00
Let s watch it.
18
SPEAKER_00
Let s watch the end of the first round with Brock Lesnar and Shane Carwin.
18
SPEAKER_00
God, I forgot we were at it.
18
SPEAKER_00
Shane was a terrifying puncher.
18
SPEAKER_00
Terrifying.
18
SPEAKER_00
He was the only guy in the UFC that they had to have gloves bigger than Brock Lesnar s.
18
SPEAKER_00
Really?
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they had like four XL gloves.
18
SPEAKER_01
Because I remember when Brock came to the UFC, they were like- The biggest gloves ever.
18
SPEAKER_01
They had to make his gloves bigger.
18
SPEAKER_00
Shane s are bigger.
18
SPEAKER_00
Really?
18
SPEAKER_00
Bro, Shane s hands were like- Dude, what a badass.
18
SPEAKER_00
They were like canned hams.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at these guys.
18
SPEAKER_00
Shane was so dangerous man like people forgot about him like in his prime He could put anybody to sleep with like a six-inch punch.
18
SPEAKER_00
He was so fucking dangerous, and he was a really good wrestler, too Yeah, and a Colorado guy, so I love them.
18
SPEAKER_00
He s a fucking beast was he in the Greg Jackson gym with all them I believe Well, I know he s out of Colorado.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I think he trained with Jackson I
18
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but this is at the point where he s already gassed.
18
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, this is at the point where he s gassed.
18
SPEAKER_00
And this is the second round.
18
SPEAKER_00
This is when Brock wins.
18
SPEAKER_00
Can you go back to, like, the first round?
18
SPEAKER_00
No, I m at the end of the first round.
18
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
18
SPEAKER_00
So this is it.
18
SPEAKER_00
So go a little bit before that so you can see how this takes place.
18
SPEAKER_00
Because, like, he stuns them on the feet.
18
SPEAKER_00
So they re standing up there.
18
SPEAKER_01
God, listen to that.
18
SPEAKER_00
And there was the uppercut.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at that uppercut.
18
SPEAKER_00
That uppercut was nasty.
18
SPEAKER_01
He s stuffed to take down.
18
SPEAKER_00
Bro, Shane was so dangerous.
18
SPEAKER_00
So dangerous.
18
SPEAKER_01
I thought it was over right there.
18
SPEAKER_00
Look at this.
18
SPEAKER_00
It could have been over right here with a lot of referees, man.
19
SPEAKER_00
A lot of referees.
19
SPEAKER_01
There has to be a feeling where you have Brock Lesnar and then you don t and you go like, fuck.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like, look at this.
19
SPEAKER_00
Look how close this is.
19
SPEAKER_00
So he s getting fucking pummeled, dude.
19
SPEAKER_00
And this goes on for a while.
19
SPEAKER_00
The thing is, Shane right now is emptying the tank, because he thinks he s got the close.
19
SPEAKER_01
He s there.
19
SPEAKER_01
He s at the end.
19
SPEAKER_01
That s what he thinks.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
This goes on for a while, dude.
19
SPEAKER_01
Dude, damn, man.
19
SPEAKER_00
It keeps going on.
19
SPEAKER_00
Look at this.
19
SPEAKER_00
Big shots.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like right there, stop the fight.
19
SPEAKER_00
Right there, you can stop the fight.
19
SPEAKER_00
But Brock is still pushing him off, but he s not really effectively defending himself.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like many referees would have been like, I ve seen enough.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like right here, the blood spraying, many referees.
19
SPEAKER_00
But no.
19
SPEAKER_01
I don t remember this fight that well.
19
SPEAKER_01
I just remember that Shane gassed.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yep.
19
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, dude.
19
SPEAKER_01
The feeling of having someone almost knocked out and they don t call it.
19
SPEAKER_01
But it gets worse.
19
SPEAKER_00
Look.
19
SPEAKER_00
It gets worse.
19
SPEAKER_00
So now he gets, I think he fully mounts him at one point in time.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like look at this, look at this.
19
SPEAKER_00
This is big, dude.
19
SPEAKER_00
These are big fucking shots.
19
SPEAKER_00
That s a big elbow.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
But he s tired.
19
SPEAKER_00
You can see him breathing heavy.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
But now he s just looking for one big shot.
19
SPEAKER_00
I mean, dude, the way he has him, I ve never seen him... I mean, he s beating the fuck out of Brock here.
19
SPEAKER_00
But now, those aren t effective.
19
SPEAKER_00
But the referee could stop the fight, man.
19
SPEAKER_00
This is fucking close.
19
SPEAKER_00
This is one of those things where the guy s getting beat up so bad, you could make an argument for stopping it.
19
SPEAKER_00
Look at all the blood, but Brock is fighting back.
19
SPEAKER_00
Shane gets on top of him again.
19
SPEAKER_00
Brock can t get up, right?
19
SPEAKER_00
He s getting mauled here.
19
SPEAKER_01
No, but Brock s saving energy doing this, right?
19
SPEAKER_01
Like, he s not.
19
SPEAKER_00
Well, I mean, he clearly had the better gas tank, because he made it out of this, and then the second round he was fresh, and Shane was done.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like, Shane right now is done.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s done.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s so tired.
19
SPEAKER_00
You have to understand how he has nothing in his arms left.
19
SPEAKER_01
He just exerted everything.
19
SPEAKER_00
He emptied the tank.
19
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever seen a fight where a guy does that and then wins by using his legs or something?
19
SPEAKER_00
Most of the time when guys empty the tank that bad, they can t recover.
19
SPEAKER_01
So it s just, they re done on everything.
19
SPEAKER_00
And so look, Brock is scrambling at the end of the round and he s getting back up to his feet.
19
SPEAKER_00
And now he s up.
19
SPEAKER_00
Now he s up.
19
SPEAKER_01
Damn, dude.
19
SPEAKER_00
If someone stands up like that, especially a Brock Lesnar against you, you go like, fuck.
19
SPEAKER_00
And Shane is kind of breaking here.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like, he s really tired.
19
SPEAKER_00
Like, you get him breathing.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s just trying to figure out a way to recover, and Brock s not going to let him recover.
19
SPEAKER_00
Because if he s defending constantly, then he s still breathing heavily, and then he s not going to be able to get his win back.
19
SPEAKER_00
This isn t just like it seems like no one s doing anything, but he s got a fight Brock off him with that overhook He s got to do something to like keep him right now.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s not doing shit right now He s just hanging on damn and Brock is catching his breath too, so Shane doesn t even have his hands clasped here He s literally not he s not digging that overhook
19
SPEAKER_00
He s really needed a break here.
19
SPEAKER_00
And Brock knows this too.
19
SPEAKER_00
So Brock recognizes that he s exhausted.
19
SPEAKER_00
So Brock knows probably also that this is the end of the round, and he s gonna make it out of this.
19
SPEAKER_00
And so then when he comes into the second round, he knows this dude s toast.
19
SPEAKER_00
Because there s a level that you get to where you re so exhausted, like you re not gonna be okay in a minute.
19
SPEAKER_00
So here s the second round.
19
SPEAKER_01
Do you think when he sits down, or when he comes back out right here, he s like, ah, fuck.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yep.
19
SPEAKER_00
Oh, you can see him breathing.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he s already exhausted.
19
SPEAKER_00
And Brock looks way better.
19
SPEAKER_00
And Brock is going to just set it up.
19
SPEAKER_00
Look for the moment.
19
SPEAKER_00
But he kind of knows that Shane s toast right here.
19
SPEAKER_00
And then he eventually shoots.
19
SPEAKER_01
Jesus, man.
19
SPEAKER_01
That s something where I would you just want to be like, I just can t let me go home.
19
SPEAKER_01
I m just fucking zapped.
19
SPEAKER_00
So he s moving away from the shots now.
19
SPEAKER_01
Look, they re like telling him, they re like, get the fuck over there.
19
SPEAKER_00
This is good for both of them, too.
19
SPEAKER_00
It gives him a chance to recover.
19
SPEAKER_00
So he swung in there, tried to land a big bomb.
19
SPEAKER_01
Do you think it s similar in any way like being at a job where you feel out of your depth where you re just like fuck?
19
SPEAKER_01
I m done.
19
SPEAKER_00
I thought this was it You know what I mean Shot so he gets on top of him and eventually arm triangle some submits him yeah, so he s just out here It is he gets him in the arm triangle.
19
SPEAKER_00
I mean is this this is a heavy pressure head and arm choke heavy pressure Oh, yeah, oh fuck
19
SPEAKER_00
He s got to push with his elbow.
19
SPEAKER_00
See how his hand is right there?
19
SPEAKER_00
What he really needs to do is what s called answering the phone.
19
SPEAKER_00
You put your hand in between Brock s head and your ear so he tapped.
19
SPEAKER_00
He was done.
19
SPEAKER_00
The defense, and it s not the best defense, but it s the only thing you have, is to get your hand like this.
19
SPEAKER_00
Hello.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, hello.
19
SPEAKER_00
Hello.
19
SPEAKER_00
Because if they just have this completely locked up, you re fucked.
19
SPEAKER_00
Jesus Christ.
19
SPEAKER_00
You got to get a little bit of space.
19
SPEAKER_01
Our future president, Brock Lesnar.
19
SPEAKER_01
Isn t that an idiocracy?
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it is.
19
SPEAKER_01
It s a former WWF champion, yeah.
19
SPEAKER_01
That would absolutely be, we would hate idiocracy.
19
SPEAKER_01
I just watched Idiocracy about a year ago, and it fucking holds up.
19
SPEAKER_01
Mike Judge is just the man.
19
SPEAKER_01
He s amazing.
19
SPEAKER_01
By the way, Office Space still holds up.
19
SPEAKER_00
Amazing.
19
SPEAKER_00
It all holds up.
19
SPEAKER_00
One of the greatest movies of all time.
19
SPEAKER_00
Beavis and Butthead, still funny.
19
SPEAKER_01
Amazing.
19
SPEAKER_00
King of the Hill, everything the guy does.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s unbelievable.
19
SPEAKER_00
Beavis and Butthead, when I first moved to California in 94, was the shit.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
Couldn t wait for Beavis and Butthead.
19
SPEAKER_00
It was the funniest thing on television.
19
SPEAKER_00
Corn Julio.
19
SPEAKER_00
Remember when he became Corn Julio and he didn t have too much sugar?
19
SPEAKER_01
The great Corn Julio, I need TP for my bunghole?
19
SPEAKER_01
Dude, I was in middle school and it was like everybody was doing Beavis and Butthead impressions.
19
SPEAKER_01
It was like, you just hear the weird kid in the back be like, that rules.
19
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, oh, Jesus Christ.
19
SPEAKER_00
It made being a degenerate dirtbag fun.
19
SPEAKER_00
These guys ruled.
19
SPEAKER_01
The movie was great, Beavis and Butthead do America.
19
SPEAKER_00
Let me see what he does it he gets so he gets too much syrup.
19
SPEAKER_00
He s just drinking all the soda Yeah
19
SPEAKER_01
I loved it.
19
SPEAKER_01
I remember going to see the movie, like, pumped.
19
SPEAKER_01
Like, waiting.
19
SPEAKER_01
Like, getting friends together and being like, Friday.
19
SPEAKER_01
Friday night, we re gonna go see Beavis and Butt-Head do America.
19
SPEAKER_00
I haven t seen the new ones.
19
SPEAKER_00
Aren t there new ones?
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re doing new ones.
19
SPEAKER_01
Are they good?
19
SPEAKER_00
Have you seen them?
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I ve seen a couple.
19
SPEAKER_01
Did you like them?
19
SPEAKER_01
Sure.
19
SPEAKER_01
Because they watch TikTok stuff now.
19
SPEAKER_00
Now they don t watch music videos.
19
SPEAKER_01
They watch, like, what we would watch and make fun of.
19
SPEAKER_01
Oh, nice.
19
SPEAKER_01
Like, that poem.
19
SPEAKER_01
They would, like, watch that.
19
SPEAKER_01
It was great.
19
SPEAKER_01
Perfect.
19
SPEAKER_00
What s it on?
19
SPEAKER_01
Paramount+.
19
SPEAKER_01
Okay, it s like buried on one of those streaming services that one.
19
SPEAKER_01
You ve go watch it.
19
SPEAKER_01
That s like where South Park is yeah a bunch of stuff there Yeah, Paramount Plus has some good shit on it.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s just annoying that you have to subscribe well.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah They re old now The show I really want to watch is Ronan on an FX and
19
SPEAKER_00
You mean Shogun?
19
SPEAKER_01
Shogun.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, Shogun looks amazing.
19
SPEAKER_01
I think there s two episodes out right now.
19
SPEAKER_01
I m going to watch it tonight after shows.
19
SPEAKER_00
What streaming service is that on?
19
SPEAKER_00
It s on Hulu because it s FX.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it looks sick.
19
SPEAKER_00
I remember the original.
19
SPEAKER_00
Oh, really?
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, the original was amazing.
19
SPEAKER_01
I didn t know this was a remake.
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, there was an original show, Shogun, way back in the day.
19
SPEAKER_00
Very excited for this.
19
SPEAKER_00
I mean, yeah, it was Shogun.
19
SPEAKER_01
This looks awesome.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s based on a novel.
19
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it is?
19
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, okay.
19
SPEAKER_01
I m I love FX does random shit sometimes, and you re like this is awesome.
19
SPEAKER_00
This is a great shit Yeah, they do great.
19
SPEAKER_01
They re kind of like what HBO used to be they did the shield yeah, yeah That was a great show the shield was very good Michael chiklis
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so Shogun American historical drama limited series created by Rachel Kondo and Justin Marks based on the 1975 novel of the same name by James Clavel The novel is previously adapted into a 1980 limited series.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s it 1980.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah click on the 1980 series who was in that?
19
SPEAKER_00
Oh shit
19
SPEAKER_00
So this was starring, who s the guy?
19
SPEAKER_00
Richard Chamberlain.
19
SPEAKER_00
That s right, Richard Chamberlain.
19
SPEAKER_01
That s right.
19
SPEAKER_01
This is like when they were letting white dudes play Japanese guys?
19
SPEAKER_01
No, he was a white guy.
19
SPEAKER_01
Oh, he was?
19
SPEAKER_00
He was supposed to be a white guy living with the Shoguns.
19
SPEAKER_00
Oh, kind of like The Last Samurai.
19
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
19
SPEAKER_00
It s basically like the Tom Cruise movie.
19
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
19
SPEAKER_00
They just stole that idea from him.
19
SPEAKER_00
That s totally lifted yeah, I think the one white guy fucking kicks ass as a samurai like good luck We re watching that we re going yeah, bro.
19
SPEAKER_00
They were raised to sword fight you shut your fucking mouth.
19
SPEAKER_00
You re gonna lose an arm Instantly you re gonna lose an arm, and then the rest of your life.
19
SPEAKER_00
You know you re like and you re and you have no honor Yeah, cuz you re a dickhead and they cut your arm off Dude, that d be a fucking and they decided not to kill you and just leave you with no arm
19
SPEAKER_01
But you then they shut off Contact with the outside world and then all the Shogun felon shit and everyone was like yeah our militaries are advanced by like a hundred years
20
SPEAKER_00
Now whoops in Japan was like forgot about bullets catch up.
20
SPEAKER_01
Well.
20
SPEAKER_01
They didn t want to use bullets, too Yeah, it was it wasn t Bushido.
20
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re one of the only successful cultures that fought off the Mongols
20
SPEAKER_00
I mean, you re talking about my favorite video game of all time, Ghost of Tsushima.
20
SPEAKER_00
Yeah?
20
SPEAKER_00
Game s unbelievable.
20
SPEAKER_01
It s a video game about the samurais and the Mongols?
20
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s about the invasion of Tsushima Island by the Mongols, and you, dude, you learn four different sword styles, and you change your sword styles to play.
20
SPEAKER_00
Dude, this game, I ve played this game, I want to say, three or four times completely.
20
SPEAKER_01
Look at the graphics.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s unbelievable and it s open world so you ride your you ride around and then you ll duel Mongols There s also no difficulty level right it s supposed to be pretty hard.
20
SPEAKER_00
You can change the difficulty.
20
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you can change the difficulty level That s awesome.
20
SPEAKER_00
You go around you get armor you learn how to duel, but you start off after they lose the invasion This is the actual game, or this is the game.
20
SPEAKER_00
This is the cutscene, but then that s the real game That s what it looks like when you re riding through.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s unbelievable
20
SPEAKER_01
Holy fuck, dude, this is amazing.
20
SPEAKER_00
Jin Sakai.
20
SPEAKER_00
You could stumble upon a camp.
20
SPEAKER_00
That s what it is, and then you fucking sneak attack.
20
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
20
SPEAKER_00
Guy right there, this is what you do.
20
SPEAKER_00
Look at this.
20
SPEAKER_00
So you can do multiple assassinations.
20
SPEAKER_00
Dude, it s ...
20
SPEAKER_00
This is insane.
20
SPEAKER_00
Anyone I ve ever told to play this game comes back and they re like, that s fucking unbelievable.
20
SPEAKER_01
This is insane.
20
SPEAKER_00
Ghost of Tsushima rules.
20
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
20
SPEAKER_00
And they said they re due for a sequel because this came out a couple of years ago.
20
SPEAKER_01
Flaming arrows.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s unbelievable.
20
SPEAKER_00
You do so much shit that you re like, this is the coolest thing.
20
SPEAKER_00
And then you have one on one sword fights with Ronins and shit.
20
SPEAKER_00
Like your best friend is a Ronin that betrays you and you have to fight him in a awesome sword, like big sword duels.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s awesome.
20
SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
20
SPEAKER_00
and your uncle is Kind of like runs it you know and you have to either you choose if you go with them or against them.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s fucking rules dude, it s Easily my top three in my top three video games are so next level well.
20
SPEAKER_01
They re movies that you play now yeah, and I got compelling than movies because you re a player in it like last of us
20
SPEAKER_00
Tanaka was it s like it s not as good as the game like you play Last of Us you re in that shit or like God of War They ll never make it into a movie, but you play it as a game.
20
SPEAKER_00
You re like.
20
SPEAKER_00
This is so fucking fun You just get into shit spider-man to the video game is better than a real video game.
20
SPEAKER_00
I m a nerd Joe Yeah, you re a junkie.
20
SPEAKER_00
I m a junkie fuck it
20
SPEAKER_00
Spider-man to I mean Ragnarok it s unbelievable spider-man 2 is better than any spider-man the video game is better than any spider-man movie they ve made It s as a comic book fan.
20
SPEAKER_00
It s better than anything.
20
SPEAKER_00
They ve made this yeah, dude balder versus Kratos fucking insane
20
SPEAKER_00
It s not as fun as doing Gay of War.
20
SPEAKER_00
God, the fucking- He s like, I want to suck boy.
20
SPEAKER_00
Boy, I m going to suck you.
20
SPEAKER_00
Is that what they do?
20
SPEAKER_00
No, I just make fun of that.
20
SPEAKER_00
Shane and I used to do this thing.
20
SPEAKER_00
This is the actual game, pun?
20
SPEAKER_00
That s a cut scene.
20
SPEAKER_01
I was trying to fight him.
20
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s where you fight him.
20
SPEAKER_00
Better look out.
20
SPEAKER_00
Reds you can t defend.
20
SPEAKER_01
Does he have magic?
20
SPEAKER_00
It s all about this shit you fight you basically fight against Odin and everyone of like all the Norse gods And they find out that you re a former Greek God oh It s awesome.
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It fucking rules with Red Dead Redemption 2 came out
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Shane Shane and I were going the road together.
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I was taking shit on the road, and we do this he would joke that I m such a nice guy He s like what s your demons like what do you do?
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And I was like it d be funny if I like jerked off homeless guys And that s what came out about me so Shane and I would do a running bit where we do a homeless guy being like hey
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Watch out, buddy.
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You re about to make me come.
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And it s just me being like, shut up.
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I m going to fucking jack you off.
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He s like, oh, hey, man.
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What are you doing?
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Shane and I would do that for weeks.
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And then I was out of the country and Red Dead Redemption 2 came out.
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And I just got this voicemail from Shane that was so excited.
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He s like, dude, have you played Red Dead Redemption 2 yet?
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I m like, no, I m not home yet.
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And he goes, Arthur Morgan is our homeless jerk off voice.
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The main character of the voice is a guy going like, well, hey there.
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And we re like, dude, that is our homeless jerk off voice.
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Oh, jack you off.
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Hey, mister.
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That s another game where you can do wild shit to people too.
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Wild shit.
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By the way, it s a game you can play four or five times and not find all the stuff.
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They put that much work into it, where they re like, nah, this is layered.
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You can go on treasure hunts and shit that you would never find unless you win after.
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You don t ever wonder if you re killing too much time doing those things?
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All the time, dude.
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All the time.
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Does it give you anxiety?
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Yeah, but I also level it by like, all right, if I m going to spend 30 minutes writing jokes, then I could play video games for two hours.
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Because I m high, what else am I going to fucking do?
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Well, that s good if you give yourself a reward.
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I quit drinking, my video game went up.
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Makes sense.
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Fills the time.
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Yeah, it makes sense.
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Because honestly, like one in the morning, I ll hang out at the cellar until like one, and then I m like ...
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Time to go kind of fun.
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Yeah, I want to go smoke a fat bowl and play fucking ghosts of Tsushima so Think about the pleasure that that kind of technology gives people People that their their lives suck, but their video game lives are awesome.
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I get it and it s the joy you get is real Yeah, you have to deal with post video game post nut syndrome Wipe it off your belly, and you re like I was a Greek God fighting
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Bullshit yeah, I fought for But it is uh they do incredible shit, and that s why it s like it s moving away from Movies and shit.
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We re like you spider-man movies are really cool But when you re actually spider-man, and you re flying around New York City, and then you got to go fight fucking venom yeah, like this is
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It s unbelievable.
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Yeah, and then they re gonna get those things to be virtual.
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But you re right, it s drugs.
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Yeah, heavy drugs.
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Heavy, don t worry.
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Heavy, heavy.
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Heavy.
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And you better believe when I get to my hotel in San Antonio.
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Dan Soda, you re the man.
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Thanks for being here, appreciate you, you re always fun.
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I m excited to work Mothership this weekend.
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Yes, I m excited you re going to be there too.
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I m fucking pumped.
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SPEAKER_01
And then, tell everybody your social, all that stuff.
20
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Got a new special out on YouTube called On The Road.
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SPEAKER_00
It comes out March 1st, which is I think today.
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SPEAKER_00
at Dan Soder on everything.
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Subscribe to my YouTube channel.
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I got a podcast called Soder.
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Just having comics come and sit on my couch and bullshit for an hour.
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Yeah, man.
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And I m on the road.
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I m on the road.
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So, dansoder.com.
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Beautiful.
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SPEAKER_00
I ll be out there.
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SPEAKER_01
I will.
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SPEAKER_01
Thanks, brother.
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Appreciate you.
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Bye, everybody.