0
SPEAKER_01
Hello?
0
SPEAKER_00
Hi there.
0
SPEAKER_01
Holy shit.
0
SPEAKER_00
What s your name?
0
SPEAKER_01
Is this... Uh, I m Bug.
0
SPEAKER_01
Is this... Is this... The Gecko?
0
SPEAKER_00
This is the Gecko.
0
SPEAKER_00
What s up, Bug?
0
SPEAKER_00
Just a- Just a bug and a gecko.
0
SPEAKER_00
Hey, be careful or I ll- or I ll eat ya.
0
SPEAKER_00
Haha.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, don t do that.
0
SPEAKER_01
Don t do that.
0
SPEAKER_00
So, Bug, uh... What s going on with you, man?
0
SPEAKER_00
What d you wanna talk about today?
0
SPEAKER_01
Um... I m... This is kinda crazy.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if, um...
0
SPEAKER_01
This is all that relatable, but I don t really feel like a person, you know?
0
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes I just want to be like a dog.
0
SPEAKER_01
Is that real?
0
SPEAKER_01
Is that a real thing people experience?
0
SPEAKER_00
Well, you re real and you re experiencing it, so yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
Type shit.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s true, actually.
0
SPEAKER_00
All right, so you feel like you might be a dog.
0
SPEAKER_00
Here s the thing, I ve, and I know people are gonna wanna make this into like a weird furry sex thing, because that s just what everyone s.
0
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_00
But no, no, no, no, I know, I know, I know, I know.
0
SPEAKER_00
I ve also thought about, I ve thought about this multiple times.
0
SPEAKER_00
You re not alone in this.
0
SPEAKER_00
I have looked at dogs.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s a funny thing to say confidently, like it s something you re bragging about.
0
SPEAKER_00
I ve looked at dogs, many dogs.
0
SPEAKER_00
And I noticed that, you know, I think people are happiest when they re like in the moment, you know, because if you re depressed, you re like thinking about, I mean, you might be depressed thinking about the future or the past.
0
SPEAKER_00
And if you re anxious, you re thinking about the future, but like.
0
SPEAKER_00
If you re really happy, it s when you re really present.
0
SPEAKER_00
And dogs, their brains are so stupid that they can t live in the future or the past.
0
SPEAKER_00
They re so stupid they can only be exactly where they are.
0
SPEAKER_01
And also, puppies literally just get to be told they re doing a good job every day.
0
SPEAKER_01
For, like, just sitting down.
0
SPEAKER_01
That sounds so easy.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
They can, like, piss outside and be, oh shit, good job, bro.
0
SPEAKER_01
Like, what?
0
SPEAKER_01
I gotta get up at 7am and go to class.
0
SPEAKER_01
I gotta write a paper.
0
SPEAKER_01
Why?
0
SPEAKER_01
No.
0
SPEAKER_01
Being a dog is being, that sounds so much easier.
0
SPEAKER_00
Alright, but here s the thing and I ll put it to you.
0
SPEAKER_00
I ll put it to you like this.
0
SPEAKER_00
Actually, I was debating with my friend the other day about whether or not it would be easier like whether or not it would be easier to be dead.
0
SPEAKER_00
I think I talked about this on the podcast to whether or not it d be easier to be dead.
0
SPEAKER_00
And this is kind of feels like a similar argument.
0
SPEAKER_00
It d be easier to be a dog, but I think ultimately it s probably
0
SPEAKER_00
more rewarding to be a human being.
0
SPEAKER_00
You have access to a greater breadth of life experience as a human than as a dog.
0
SPEAKER_00
Do you not agree with that?
0
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes, but I guess I don t really go out much.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m kind of, I m kind of a homebody.
0
SPEAKER_01
I sort of just smoke weed and play video games.
0
SPEAKER_01
So
0
SPEAKER_01
Are you enjoying your... Go ahead.
0
SPEAKER_01
Am I enjoying my experience?
0
SPEAKER_01
Are you enjoying your experience?
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I m still doing it.
0
SPEAKER_01
So, I guess so.
0
SPEAKER_01
But, like... I feel like there s gotta be more, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
How old are you?
0
SPEAKER_00
I m 20.
0
SPEAKER_00
What more do you desire for there to be?
0
SPEAKER_01
Don t even like anything what the fuck what what what more could like don t people Don t people fall in love at some point Like isn t there Stuff to do I ain t never had no job.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m 20 years old.
0
SPEAKER_01
I never had a job.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s crazy, isn t it?
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, well, it s very funny to me that when I asked you what more there is to life, you said all things that are human things.
0
SPEAKER_00
Right?
0
SPEAKER_00
Like- Don t call him a- Yeah, but you re talking about like roman- you re talking about like romantic.
0
SPEAKER_00
Love I assume you re talking about romantic love.
0
SPEAKER_00
I don t think dogs feel Romantic love they feel like familial love and they certainly get very horny and they fuck each other but They I don t think that they like Like that like no dog has ever like You know written a poem about a woman that he s in love with you know like I don t think dogs experience that kind of Love they just get horny
0
SPEAKER_00
And a lot of humans as well also have not experienced that kind of love and also just get horny.
0
SPEAKER_00
But that feels like a human thing.
0
SPEAKER_00
And then jobs.
0
SPEAKER_00
Some dogs have jobs, but most don t.
0
SPEAKER_00
So the things that you re talking about wanting more out of your life are they re human things.
0
SPEAKER_00
Right, right, right.
0
SPEAKER_00
Dogs can t even smoke weed and play video games.
0
SPEAKER_00
So your life experience would be... If you think you re not getting enough out of life right now, if you re sitting here going, is this all there is?
0
SPEAKER_00
I mean, if you re a dog, imagine all the things that you re doing right now.
0
SPEAKER_00
Imagine all the things you re doing right now being like, is this all there is?
0
SPEAKER_00
And then, you know, get rid of at least 12 of them.
0
SPEAKER_00
And you probably have like five things.
0
SPEAKER_00
As a dog, you can do like five things.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s actually, I never thought about that like that.
0
SPEAKER_01
I wouldn t be able to do, wow.
0
SPEAKER_01
Actually, thank you.
0
SPEAKER_01
You opened my eyes to a lot of shit today.
0
SPEAKER_00
So think about it like this, everything that you re doing, smoking weed, playing video games, having a conversation with me right now, going on Reddit and looking at bugs and shit.
0
SPEAKER_00
Reddit?
0
SPEAKER_00
Who s on Reddit?
0
SPEAKER_00
You re on Reddit.
0
SPEAKER_00
Everything that you re doing,
0
SPEAKER_00
is don t lie and say you re not on reddit you you re a redditor everything that you re doing is an amazing thing outside of uh like a like to a dog all these like like you re fantasizing about this like human life that doesn t exist where you go like walter midi mode and you re you know living the all these crazy experiences but to a dog you re walter midi you re living the crazy life getting high and playing video games
0
SPEAKER_00
Right.
0
SPEAKER_00
Right, right, right.
0
SPEAKER_00
Now, let me tell you something.
0
SPEAKER_00
Now, let me tell you something even crazier bug.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_00
All right.
0
SPEAKER_00
So we ve established that getting high playing video games and going on Reddit and having conversations with other people is like a crazy experience.
0
SPEAKER_00
Get this.
0
SPEAKER_00
If you want it to, if you want it to, it could get even crazier.
0
SPEAKER_01
Even crazier?
0
SPEAKER_01
How s that?
0
SPEAKER_00
Well, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_00
I mean, what do you, what do you want?
0
SPEAKER_00
How do you want it to be crazy?
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, what, what s what, what, what, what makes it crazy or how does it get crazier?
0
SPEAKER_01
Like, how do I, how do I improve this?
0
SPEAKER_01
If I, if I can t, if I can t be a dog or if being a dog is a step down, then
0
SPEAKER_01
Where do I go?
0
SPEAKER_01
What do I, how do I expand?
0
SPEAKER_01
You know, what do I do?
0
SPEAKER_00
It s a good question.
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, well, you want to fall in love, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
Facts.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_00
You should probably get ripped.
0
SPEAKER_00
That would help.
0
SPEAKER_01
Why are you what what is this?
0
SPEAKER_01
What is this idea that I m on reddit that I m not like what what do you what is hold on?
0
SPEAKER_00
I didn t infer a lot.
0
SPEAKER_00
I may you know what you re right.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m sorry.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m sorry I shouldn t have assumed that you re not already ripped I Mean like I m not but it s Like it s fine though, no, no, I m not I m not
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you should get ripped.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s one.
0
SPEAKER_00
What else?
0
SPEAKER_00
What else?
0
SPEAKER_00
All right, you wanna fall in love?
0
SPEAKER_00
All right, you ll get ripped and fall in love.
0
SPEAKER_00
All right, we ve done that.
0
SPEAKER_00
What else?
0
SPEAKER_00
What do you wanna do?
0
SPEAKER_00
You wanna climb a mountain?
0
SPEAKER_00
Do you wanna go to China?
0
SPEAKER_00
What else is going on with you?
0
SPEAKER_00
What do you wanna do?
0
SPEAKER_00
Climbing a mountain sounds kind of fun, actually.
0
SPEAKER_01
I feel like that might be dangerous, though.
0
SPEAKER_00
You gotta get ripped to do that, too.
1
SPEAKER_00
Do I have to get ripped to go to China?
1
SPEAKER_01
You do not have to get ripped to go to China.
1
SPEAKER_00
I ll be, I ll be fat in China.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can be fat in China.
1
SPEAKER_01
That sounds fun, dude.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, they got good food too.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like I feel like I could just be fat in China and then smoke weed and get fatter in China.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know, we ve been talking, uh, see you re a dog.
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
Try it.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s dogs in China, but no, if, if, if you were, if you were a dog in America, you could not of your own will go get fat and smoke weed in China.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m pretty sure if you smoke weed in China, they ll put you in jail for like 30 years, but I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is weed like super illegal in China?
1
SPEAKER_01
Probably, I have no idea.
1
SPEAKER_01
But, um, see if you were a dog, you couldn t go be fat and go to China.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, if you re, you d be at the behest of another, of a human being taking you there.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I would say 99.999% of dogs living in America have never been to China.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s probably true.
1
SPEAKER_00
I d agree.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, you re probably right about that.
1
SPEAKER_01
So have I, I feel like I don t, I feel like I ve successfully convinced you that it s better to be a human than a dog.
1
SPEAKER_00
I think, um, I m starting to realize that being a human might be the higher life form.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m starting to see it.
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
So you re going to go get fat in China and you re going to come back and get ripped and fall in love.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s two things.
1
SPEAKER_01
You want more?
1
SPEAKER_01
You want more things?
1
SPEAKER_01
How many more things you want?
1
SPEAKER_00
I just want to fall in love right now, honestly.
1
SPEAKER_00
I feel like falling in love might fix me.
1
SPEAKER_00
But I thought being a dog would fix me.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then I called you, and now I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
You think being in love will fix you?
1
SPEAKER_01
You know, I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m going to tell you, I m going to, I m going to get vulnerable with you for a second about with this, because it s an interesting, I think a lot of people think of that.
1
SPEAKER_01
And, um, I avoided that for a while and I was like, oh, I, I m going to just dive into, um, uh, you know, the whole thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, I mean, you re, you re, I think you re in a point where you, you should explore yourself.
1
SPEAKER_01
Cause I mean, going from,
1
SPEAKER_01
I think not wanting to be a dog would fix you more than falling in love.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know what I m saying?
1
SPEAKER_01
But I was gonna say, I think falling in love, I think is a nice... I don t know, I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I used to think it was like an accessory to life, but I do think it s an integral life thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
But there s all sorts of integral life things, and falling in love is just one of them.
1
SPEAKER_01
So you can t just fall in love and then have the rest of your life be like dog shit, and then like that, you just lean on that, because then you re fucked.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know, falling in love is part of a complete breakfast of life.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know?
1
SPEAKER_00
Right.
1
SPEAKER_01
Right.
1
SPEAKER_01
Right.
1
SPEAKER_01
That makes sense.
1
SPEAKER_00
You d think if I was a villain, I would be better?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like if I was, if I was a, if I turned to crime to spice up my life, if I turned to something like, you know,
1
SPEAKER_00
I said earlier, I don t know if you heard me when I said this, but I said I never had a job in my 20 years of life.
1
SPEAKER_00
If I turn to something like, um, dealing weed instead of smoking it, you think I could, um, you think that might be fulfilling?
1
SPEAKER_01
What are you fucking talking about, man?
1
SPEAKER_00
I m just trying to, like, figure out, like, you said that being in love won t fix me.
1
SPEAKER_01
You said that being a dog won t fix me.
1
SPEAKER_01
Why are the three things in your mind that will fix you?
1
SPEAKER_01
Why are the three things in your mind that will fix you?
1
SPEAKER_01
Being a dog, falling in love, and dealing weed?
1
SPEAKER_00
How did you arrive at those three things?
1
SPEAKER_00
Money, love, and what do dogs get?
1
SPEAKER_00
They get praise.
1
SPEAKER_01
Dogs can t deal weed or fall in love.
1
SPEAKER_01
They can t do either of those things.
1
SPEAKER_00
But they receive love.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can receive love as a human being.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I haven t though.
1
SPEAKER_01
Do you have friends?
1
SPEAKER_00
I have, kind of.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s a weird concept.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t really know what friends are.
1
SPEAKER_01
You do not know what friends are.
1
SPEAKER_01
Tell me more what you mean by that.
1
SPEAKER_00
I think that I really struggle keeping people close.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m not really good at opening up to people or being myself around people.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m also a Gemini, and I have a really bad tendency of adopting other people s personalities.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is that an astrology thing?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m going to get some flack for this, but I, I, I, one thing I don t like, I don t like astrology because, and I m, by the way, you seem like you do.
1
SPEAKER_01
So I m open to being wrong.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can fill me in with your take on my take.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m open to that.
1
SPEAKER_01
But I don t like, one thing I don t like about astrology is that I don t like the idea that it becomes like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know what I m saying?
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, you go on a website and it goes, hey, because you were born at this time, you re an asshole.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then you go, oh, I must be an asshole because I was born at this time.
1
SPEAKER_01
Or it s like, because you were born at this time, you don t know how to talk to people that well.
1
SPEAKER_01
And you re like, oh, all right, I guess that s true.
1
SPEAKER_01
And it just becomes like what you think about yourself, kind of like your thoughts become reality.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know what I mean?
1
SPEAKER_01
Does that make sense?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s kind of like you manifest all the negative shit.
1
SPEAKER_01
Right, right, right.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I don t believe in manifestation in like a, like a woo woo way, but in this terms of like, Oh, if you read something on the internet that says that because the moon is a certain way, you don t know how to make friends that you, and you just repeat that in your brain, you like, that becomes kind of like a part of your, uh, self-belief, you know?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
But I mean, it s fun.
1
SPEAKER_01
I guess it s fun.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s fun looking at stars and shit.
1
SPEAKER_01
But anyway, I didn t mean to take away from your personal life experience to shit on astrology.
1
SPEAKER_01
What else?
1
SPEAKER_01
Do you?
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
Can I ask you this?
1
SPEAKER_01
What?
1
SPEAKER_01
Have you taken away anything from this conversation that is remotely positive?
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, that I should go to the gym and, um, probably stop thinking so negatively.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s good.
1
SPEAKER_00
But like, um, yeah, no, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Are you going to get off Reddit?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m not on it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, I bet I still don t understand where that came from.
1
SPEAKER_00
I was never on it.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, yeah, the whole thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, I guess I just, I hope, I hope you re not like, cause you don t, I know you re all right.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m going to sound lame, but you re, you, you, you let your life is so precious.
1
SPEAKER_01
Why would you want to give it away to be a stupid fucking dog?
1
SPEAKER_01
You know?
1
SPEAKER_01
By the way, if I can tell you one final thing that would persuade you against being a dog, can I tell you this?
1
SPEAKER_01
If you were, what kind of dog would you want to be?
1
SPEAKER_01
Just real quick.
1
SPEAKER_00
I haven t thought about it that fucking much.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t fucking know.
1
SPEAKER_00
A pool one?
1
SPEAKER_01
You were a dog if you were a dog you would be dead as shit right now.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s no 20 year old dog So next time you see a dog Yeah, I would just I just if we can get anything from this conversation I just want it to be that next time you see a dog instead of being like oh, I wish I was a dog just be like
2
SPEAKER_02
That dog s a fucking loser.
2
SPEAKER_02
He has no idea how awesome it is to be a human being and get high and play video games and go to China.
2
SPEAKER_00
That sounds so sad.
2
SPEAKER_02
Why s it sad?
2
SPEAKER_00
No, I don t want to think about a dog like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
Think about a dog like what?
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, that dog s a loser.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t think any dogs are losers.
2
SPEAKER_02
No, some dogs are... I mean... Listen.
2
SPEAKER_02
I think... I think you have a cooler life than most dogs.
2
SPEAKER_02
Or at minimum, you have the potential to have a cooler life than most dogs.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
Sure.
2
SPEAKER_02
Do you accept that ideology?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but like, I don t think a dog is a loser.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, I don t, I just think dogs, like, I feel like they re just innocent little creatures.
2
SPEAKER_02
Innocent little creatures who contribute nothing to the economy or society.
2
SPEAKER_02
I m not going to say nothing to the economy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because money is so real and important.
2
SPEAKER_00
But anyway, thank you, Kek.
2
SPEAKER_00
Of course.
2
SPEAKER_00
I appreciated this therapy session.
2
SPEAKER_02
Of course.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bug, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer?
2
SPEAKER_02
Actually, you know what?
2
SPEAKER_02
You know what?
2
SPEAKER_02
Dogs do contribute to the... Sure, why not?
2
SPEAKER_02
They contribute to the economy.
2
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I ll say this.
2
SPEAKER_02
Cartoon dogs contribute to the economy because there s a lot of Family Guy shirts with Brian on them that people sell.
2
SPEAKER_02
So I ll categorize that as dogs contributing to the economy.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bug, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
2
SPEAKER_00
Everyone should pack a bowl or roll a joint.
2
SPEAKER_00
And if you don t have papers, go to the quarter store right now and buy some.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thanks.
2
SPEAKER_00
See ya.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was a phone call.
2
SPEAKER_00
Bye.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bye, Bug.
2
SPEAKER_02
Dogs can t roll... See, Bug?
2
SPEAKER_02
Dogs can t roll joints.
2
SPEAKER_02
They have little... Um... They have little... little... paws.
2
SPEAKER_02
Hey folks, this is Lyle.
2
SPEAKER_02
I am very excited to announce that I am going back on tour in 2024 to do Therapy Gecko Live all across the country.
2
SPEAKER_02
If you ve never been to one of my live shows before, they are extremely fun, unpredictable, wild evenings that involve a mix of group gecko therapy sessions as well as some material and presentations from myself.
2
SPEAKER_02
And if you ve been to the show before, I have new presentations and will of course be interviewing new people.
2
SPEAKER_02
If you re a fan of the podcast, you re gonna have a great time at the live show, so I hope to see you guys there.
2
SPEAKER_02
Go to therapygeckotour.com or check the link in the episode description for a full list of cities where tickets are available.
2
SPEAKER_02
Also, if you don t see your city on the list of cities, please still click the link and RSVP with your phone number so I can contact you when tickets go on sale for your city because I m going to announce a bunch more dates very soon.
2
SPEAKER_02
Geck bless.
2
SPEAKER_02
Hi, what s your name?
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, hey, uh, Savera.
2
SPEAKER_01
Nice to talk to you, actually.
2
SPEAKER_02
Savera, what s going on, dog?
2
SPEAKER_01
I am just waiting out like the last half hour of work.
2
SPEAKER_01
I just got done snaking a drain and just waiting to go home.
2
SPEAKER_02
Savera, you said to me, you texted me and you said, I want to chat about the infinite checkerboard.
2
SPEAKER_02
What the hell is that?
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
So for my life and my memories, I ve got about three points, right?
2
SPEAKER_01
Three different sections.
2
SPEAKER_01
There s my adult memory.
2
SPEAKER_01
my childhood into being six months old memories.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then there s like a block of memories before that.
2
SPEAKER_01
And the only way that I can describe it is it sort of starts out with like this giant ring of light and there s something or somebody standing there and I m standing there, too.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I start moving backwards, like along my life, watching all of the things that I ve done from a different perspective and a different angle.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right.
2
SPEAKER_02
Dude, you are the most esoteric man in Oklahoma.
2
SPEAKER_01
Possibly, possibly.
2
SPEAKER_01
Everybody that I tell this to sort of reacts a little bit the same way, but it s like, it s just one of those things that sits inside of my brain and it makes me question sort of how everything is, because it s like, how is it possible for me to have memories like this in a world that people say, oh, it s this religion or it s that religion, or people say, oh, it s mechanical, it s stupid, you know, there s nothing, it s just happenstance and stuff.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s like, okay,
2
SPEAKER_01
But then how do I run into this, right?
2
SPEAKER_01
Because like, so it goes from that to sort of all of that stuff, memories become this big jumble, and it s sort of like, like a panic attack, but on a galactic scale.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then it becomes clear.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I, whatever or whoever I am at that time, I m a sphere with a mouth and no eyes.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I just realized that I ve been narrating
2
SPEAKER_01
everything that s been happening inside of me, like someone were to narrate every single action that goes on in a universe, right?
2
SPEAKER_01
And I start looking around, and I noticed that there are other shapes, other three dimensional shapes that are talking and doing the same thing I was doing.
2
SPEAKER_01
And they are all in their own little square, a black square, and a red square.
2
SPEAKER_01
And as I start to look out, I m like, holy crap, it s just an infinite checkerboard almost,
2
SPEAKER_01
with an infinite number of these different shapes and different colors all doing the same exact thing, which is just narrating everything that s going on inside of them.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I turned to this pink sphere.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_02
I can t decide if I would be more likely to run into you on a pickleball court or under a bridge.
2
SPEAKER_01
Honestly, probably both.
2
SPEAKER_01
I like to hang out.
2
SPEAKER_01
All places, as much as I can, you know?
2
SPEAKER_01
Go see what Pickleball is, try that out, but also hang under a bridge, because there s usually not a lot of people there, and you could throw rocks into the water.
2
SPEAKER_02
No, continue.
2
SPEAKER_02
I want to hear the rest of this.
2
SPEAKER_01
Hell yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I look to this pink sphere, and I m guessing it s a she, because as I understand now, she sounded feminine.
2
SPEAKER_01
She s doing the same thing I m doing, and I m just like, hey, don t you think it s kind of weird that every single one of us is a three-dimensional shape just talking about stuff that s going on inside of us?
2
SPEAKER_01
And then she got upset and basically told me to shut the hell up and then went back to doing what she was doing.
2
SPEAKER_01
And from that point, I guess I kind of like uprooted and became free for lack of a better word.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I m just sort of floating and there s no coherency and there s no consistency and there s no like nothing that we experienced now.
2
SPEAKER_01
And the way that I know this is as whatever this experience is, I m going through is continuing.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m kind of floating down this, what could almost be perceived as a river.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then in the middle, in front of me, this window opens up and suddenly there s a bicycle.
2
SPEAKER_01
And that is the most profound thing that I think I felt from them.
2
SPEAKER_01
Cause it s like in whatever this is in a place where the concept of concept, time, physicality, whatever doesn t exist, there s something that is constant and it has a name.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I know it has a name and I have no idea how I know what this thing
2
SPEAKER_01
And then from there, it s like more of these little windows and there s like a sailboat and another thing and another thing.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then it sort of just goes dark.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then from there is when my first memory starts at six months old of my dad, my birth giver, moving from one house to the other.
2
SPEAKER_01
And at first I thought, oh, I just dreamed that.
2
SPEAKER_01
But then I was talking to my dad about it and describing the vehicle that I saw and everything that was sticking out of it and where we were.
2
SPEAKER_01
And he was like, yeah, you were six months old and we were leaving the house we were living in at the time to move to somewhere else.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I just needed to tell somebody who s not in like my associated friend group or anything, because I usually get the same response from them.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s just sort of a shrug.
2
SPEAKER_01
OK, cool.
2
SPEAKER_01
Whatever.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s just you.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I m like.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know what it is.
2
SPEAKER_01
Nobody has the ability, it seems, to give me any kind of answers whatsoever, you know?
2
SPEAKER_01
But all I know is that it sort of colored my perception on what life and existence is, because it s like, okay, what am I really then if that is in my brain?
2
SPEAKER_01
That is a system of memories I had, and I had no access to drugs or anything at the time, but also how is it that I can be understanding English and understanding this is English,
2
SPEAKER_01
when I possibly hadn t been born into a society that even spoke the language in the first place.
2
SPEAKER_02
You kind of sound like a white Kanye West.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if I should be insulted by that, but that s pretty good.
2
SPEAKER_02
I m sorry, I, um, I, uh, I, I was too busy thinking of, uh, different jokes to make about you to really fully, uh, understand everything that you were just saying to me.
2
SPEAKER_02
But, um, let me think here.
2
SPEAKER_02
Let me think here.
2
SPEAKER_02
Um, what s your name again?
2
SPEAKER_02
Severa.
2
SPEAKER_01
By the way, Severa, you seem like a nice guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
you seem like a really nice guy I mean that you seem like a nice guy you seem like a nice guy I do mean that holy shit I m so sorry I have I have I I I m gonna tell you right now I can t help you I m just gonna put that out there I can t help you but
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, shit.
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh... Well... You saw it... Yeah, I mean this- you re- you re the therapy gecko.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re beyond me, in this point.
3
SPEAKER_00
And this is- and this is pro- this is unfortunately the problem that you re gonna have with this, is that you re gonna explain- and maybe, uh, people are gonna be listening to this, and they re gonna be like, Lyle, you re just stupid and you didn t- you didn t actually listen to him, which might be a little bit true, but, um...
3
SPEAKER_00
Maybe that s the problem, is that everyone you go to to try to make some sense of this is just like, I don t know what the fuck you re talking about right now.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
But, uh... Yeah, I don t... I don t fucking know, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it was... Okay, let me... Can I ask you some simple questions and get some simple answers?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
Everything you just talked to me about, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Is it good?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_02
That s the thing.
3
SPEAKER_02
So the experience itself was phenomenal.
3
SPEAKER_02
I guess what I m experiencing is I grew up in a very, I grew up in Texas, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
So very like Christian dominated place.
3
SPEAKER_02
And so for a while, that was my view of the universe, you know, being terrified at all times that if I messed up or made a mistake and didn t beg for forgiveness on my knees, that I was going to go suffering for all eternity.
3
SPEAKER_02
Right.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then as time went by and I got out of that, suddenly it became more spiritualist, you know, like a Eastern thing brought over to the West and Alan Watts and all that good stuff.
3
SPEAKER_02
And now it s sort of like, I don t know what to expect or what to think on what life is or how it arranges itself.
3
SPEAKER_02
But the only thing I know is I have been told all of my life that
3
SPEAKER_00
it s this way or it s that way it s very rigid and very you know but this no it s anything that i have it s anything yeah it s anything yeah exactly all right all right so all right so enough with this enough with all the bullshit stuff all right so tell me this if i i m so sorry i don t remember anyone s name i m gonna call you greg
3
SPEAKER_00
Greg enough with this um what do you like tell me this okay and let s get out of get get out of the esoteric nonsense for me for a second i promise i m not saying they just to be dismissive this is there s a purpose the only reason i want you to get out of the esoteric nonsense for a second is because
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you ve come to- all of this stuff and you went and you saw dragons, you went to Zathura, you re there.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay?
3
SPEAKER_00
So tell me now, Greg, what in the physical universe are you going to do with this information where you just discovered that life can be however you desire it to be?
3
SPEAKER_00
What will you do with this information, Greg?
3
SPEAKER_02
That s what I want to know.
3
SPEAKER_02
I m going to continue on my plan to move to Washington State so that I can open a gay little cafe called The Place so that people can have a place they can go to 24 hours a day, six days a week to just sit down and relax.
3
SPEAKER_00
Love it!
3
SPEAKER_00
Love a gay little 24-hour cafe.
3
SPEAKER_00
Love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Do I I love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love it s hilarious how much?
3
SPEAKER_00
Science fiction stuff it took you to get there to be like I should open up a cafe, but I m glad I m glad that sounds like it s a great goal.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s great.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love you.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
What are you gonna call you the place?
3
SPEAKER_00
Right the place the place, but I m stupid.
3
SPEAKER_00
I you said that When when are you gonna do this?
3
SPEAKER_02
My last day where I work now is next Friday and then I m moving back to my hometown to save up money to hopefully in six months, I need about $5,000 to move up there with a friend.
3
SPEAKER_02
So six months at the most is the projection.
3
SPEAKER_00
Very cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
All right.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love this, by the way.
3
SPEAKER_00
I know I was making fun of you this whole time, but I actually love this because it is like, because that s the thing, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Is that anyone can have a crazy spiritual experience, but for me, it s about like, okay, what in the real world, like, do you come out of that with a significant plan of action for your day-to-day life?
3
SPEAKER_00
And you have, and you have a plan.
3
SPEAKER_00
So I m stoked for you.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is awesome, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
Thanks for sharing.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, like to be honest, I ll hang up here just a sec because I got a clock out, but it s been really hard my own way.
3
SPEAKER_02
You know, just I don t want to get too much into it.
3
SPEAKER_02
It s just been really, really difficult.
3
SPEAKER_02
And for the first time in 25 years, I m at this point where I m like, oh, it s okay for me to do the things that I want to do just because I want to do them.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes, I love that.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s good.
3
SPEAKER_00
And all it took was a checkerboard.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yep, right.
3
SPEAKER_02
Some people, it s having a discussion with somebody they respect and other people, I don t know, even know what it is.
3
SPEAKER_00
Greg, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
3
SPEAKER_00
I know you got to go clock out.
3
SPEAKER_00
I want to give you the chance to talk beforehand.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yes, actually, to anybody listening, if you are in college right now as a maintenance worker, hygiene products and wipeys do not go down the toilet.
3
SPEAKER_02
I know it says flushable, but that s a technicality because a human body can hold a knife, but that doesn t mean it s supposed to go there.
3
SPEAKER_02
All that s going to happen is it s going to clog your toilets and your maintenance guys are going to have to deal with it.
3
SPEAKER_00
You have just entered the top five of most specific answers to that final question that I have heard.
3
SPEAKER_02
That is a wonderful top five to be a part of, and I m very happy about that.
3
SPEAKER_00
Hey, take care, Greg.
3
SPEAKER_00
Good luck.
3
SPEAKER_00
Good luck.
3
SPEAKER_00
Hope you visit the place one day next time I m in Washington.
3
SPEAKER_02
I hope so too.
3
SPEAKER_02
And if you re there, give you a discount.
3
SPEAKER_00
Beautiful.
3
SPEAKER_02
Take care, man.
3
SPEAKER_02
You too.
3
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love any, I love a thing where, um, I love any call where my clarity, uh, you know, occurs on a spectrum.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right.
3
SPEAKER_00
Because, uh, for, there s a good amount of time talking to that guy.
3
SPEAKER_00
I just had no idea what he was talking about and followed by an amount of time where I felt deeply connected to him and what he was talking about.
3
SPEAKER_00
So that s, that s a sign of a good conversation.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yo.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sup?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yo!
3
SPEAKER_01
Yo, what the fuck is good, bro?
3
SPEAKER_00
Not much, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
What s going on with you?
3
SPEAKER_01
I m just at work right now.
3
SPEAKER_00
What do you do for work?
3
SPEAKER_01
What s good with you?
3
SPEAKER_01
I work for a health system.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I drive around and pick up blood samples.
3
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes body parts.
3
SPEAKER_01
Stuff like that.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, what body parts?
3
SPEAKER_01
Um, like a lot of cancer patients that like get like, uh, like their breasts removed.
3
SPEAKER_01
Uh, so I picked up like a lot of breast, uh, diabetics when they get their legs cut off.
3
SPEAKER_01
Um, I ve, I ve like shoved, uh, like all this stuff in the back of her Prius and like, uh, you know, uh, yeah, it s, that s pretty dope.
3
SPEAKER_00
So you re driving around in a Prius with tits and legs?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
What do you do with them afterwards?
3
SPEAKER_01
I drop them off at an unspecified location and they run tests on them.
3
SPEAKER_00
What kind of tests?
3
SPEAKER_01
Like, you know, like diagnosis, like, oh, like mainly they re just like samples of the breasts and stuff.
3
SPEAKER_01
So then
3
SPEAKER_01
like there s uh these like histologists here like like look at it and be like oh yeah well you have like cancer or whatever and then yeah but like that s like way beyond me i m just the guy who uh who transports them in a prius interesting uh why you just jam them and you just have like a tit flopping around in the in the trunk of your prius yeah well
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, pretty much.
3
SPEAKER_01
They re all in containers and biohazard bags and everything, but underneath the base layer, yeah, I just drive around with tits flopping around in the back of Prius.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s pretty cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
Some people will see you driving the Prius and they ll be like, huh, that guy s lame.
3
SPEAKER_00
But little do they know, he has tits in his trunk.
3
SPEAKER_01
Exactly, bro, exactly.
3
SPEAKER_01
And like, you know, you never judge someone based off the Prius.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I ain t gonna lie, they re pretty dope.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like driving a little go-kart, to be honest.
3
SPEAKER_01
And they don t really go too fast, but.
3
SPEAKER_01
You drove a Prius as well?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I drove a Prius in high school.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I got into an accident.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I got into an accident and I was like on the side of the road and my Prius was like totaled
4
SPEAKER_00
and I was just kind of standing there waiting for like vehicles to come.
4
SPEAKER_00
And this guy drives past me and he yells out his window and he goes, that s what you get for driving a Prius.
4
SPEAKER_02
That is hilarious.
4
SPEAKER_02
There s a lot of people that treat you differently on the road, especially for driving a Prius.
4
SPEAKER_00
How so?
4
SPEAKER_00
In what way do you feel that people treat you differently?
4
SPEAKER_02
I mean, you know, just like the same thing that you just described a little bit, but like, I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_02
There s a, there s a lot of like diesel trucks where I, where I am.
4
SPEAKER_02
And, uh, like a lot of them will just like drive by and just blow like black smoke all over the car and shit.
4
SPEAKER_02
And, uh, you know, and then like, you know, people will just like swerve in, try to cut you off cause they think that you re like,
4
SPEAKER_02
I don t know, they think less of you because you drive a Prius or something.
4
SPEAKER_02
But questions.
4
SPEAKER_02
Were you dressed?
4
SPEAKER_02
Were you in?
4
SPEAKER_02
Were you like in a costume when you told your Prius?
4
SPEAKER_02
Because I can totally see you, like, in the gecko costume, like, standing on the side of the highway.
4
SPEAKER_00
Why would I have been in the gecko costume when I was driving the Prius?
4
SPEAKER_00
I had no idea that I would... I was like 17 when this happened.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t think... I had no idea that I would be in a gecko costume eight years later.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, if you had to go back in time, would you do it again, but be in a gecko costume?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, definitively would say I would not.
4
SPEAKER_02
Interesting.
4
SPEAKER_00
Now, have you ever worried about what would happen if you got into an accident and all the boobs and legs fell out of your car?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I was thinking about that, because I do think about that quite often.
4
SPEAKER_02
Cause like people don t really stop around here.
4
SPEAKER_02
So like, if I m just sitting at a red light, there s like people that come up like super hot behind me and like all the, all the specimens and stuff were like in the trunk.
4
SPEAKER_02
So like, I don t know this one time I was driving around and I like kind of just imagined, uh, getting rear ended with, uh, of a left leg, like in my, in my past, in like the trunk and then it gets hit and it goes like flying through the windshield.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then, I could see that happening.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then, you know what I mean?
4
SPEAKER_02
And it just, like, makes this, like, huge dramatic thing out of, like, nothing.
4
SPEAKER_02
Because, like, I would be fine, but, like, there would just be a leg, like, in the windshield.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I could see that.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s like a Final Destination type of death, I could see.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, definitely, definitely.
4
SPEAKER_00
Was it always your dream to transport body parts, or was there something else that you wanted to do?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, well, kind of.
4
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I ve always kind of wanted to work in healthcare, and then this kind of just happened upon me.
4
SPEAKER_02
So it kind of worked out, and it was a good way to get my foot in the door here.
4
SPEAKER_00
Get your foot in the door and get some other people s feet in your door too.
4
SPEAKER_02
And they re in the windshield and the windshield and the windshield Is this considered work I know not to demean your job is this considered working in health care Technically yes It s like it s considered non-clinical But it s still like in the same environment and You know, I look at it in terms of networking like I you know, I
4
SPEAKER_02
A lot of network connections and stuff that I can make and have made and stuff like that.
4
SPEAKER_00
So yeah, I can I do consider it Now I m curious about this and and this is the last thing I ll ask you and you don t have if it s too sensitive of a subject You don t have to answer it.
4
SPEAKER_00
But have you ever been approached?
4
SPEAKER_00
by the mafia Looking to intercept your vehicle to sell your tits on the black market
4
SPEAKER_02
No, I haven t.
4
SPEAKER_02
But now that you point that out, I m going to keep a good eye on that.
4
SPEAKER_02
Because I never would have even thought about that.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s, that s amazing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Sure.
4
SPEAKER_02
I hope that actually, I actually hope that does happen.
4
SPEAKER_02
That d be kind of cool.
4
SPEAKER_02
I would get in like a high speed chase.
4
SPEAKER_02
Like they would obviously have like faster cars than me.
4
SPEAKER_02
But you know, I can just whip the go cart.
4
SPEAKER_02
Like, it d be pretty cool.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you know, I don t think a Prius is the first choice for a police chase.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, it wouldn t be the police, it would be the mafia.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yes, the mafia.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, I know you could you could throw that would be a good scene because you could take a leg and like throw it from behind them and it would like go into the windshield and they d crash and the car would explode.
4
SPEAKER_02
That would be awesome.
4
SPEAKER_02
That d be pretty sweet.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I could take like little blood vials and just throw them out the window like grenades.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right, like it s like oil that they re slipping and sliding on.
4
SPEAKER_02
That they re slipping and sliding on, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
This is like Mario Kart that we re doing, except it s with human body parts and blood.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s like Mario Kart, but gross.
4
SPEAKER_02
The graphic Mario Kart, the leg would be the blue shell.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again, sir?
4
SPEAKER_02
Uh, my name is, uh, ladder.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s not your real name, right?
4
SPEAKER_02
No, that is my real name.
4
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
You sound like you just looked and saw a ladder and picked that as your fake name.
4
SPEAKER_02
L E D R. No L A D D E R. That s cool.
4
SPEAKER_00
What kind of name is that?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, I don t know, honestly, I think my parents are tripping when they named me or something, but you know,
4
SPEAKER_02
It is kind of cool because I can kind of stretch my arms out like Mr. Elastic a little bit whenever someone needs a ladder.
4
SPEAKER_02
It was a true gift from the universe.
4
SPEAKER_00
You re a cool guy, Ladder.
4
SPEAKER_00
Always remember that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thank you, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
4
SPEAKER_02
Keep watching the stream.
4
SPEAKER_02
And if you ever wanna talk to Gek himself, you just gotta blow up the text message line.
4
SPEAKER_02
Anyways, have a good one, Gek.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hey, you too, Lighter.
4
SPEAKER_00
Take care.
4
SPEAKER_02
Bye-bye.
4
SPEAKER_00
Get those body parts to their final destination safely.
4
SPEAKER_01
Hello?
4
SPEAKER_00
Hi, what s your name?
4
SPEAKER_01
Uh, my name is Juniper.
4
SPEAKER_00
Juniper!
4
SPEAKER_00
What s up, Juniper?
4
SPEAKER_00
Have we ever spoken before, Juniper?
4
SPEAKER_01
Uh, no, this is actually my first time.
4
SPEAKER_00
Cool.
4
SPEAKER_00
I feel like I spoke to a Juniper.
4
SPEAKER_00
Uh, there s not a lot of people.
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you ever go by June?
4
SPEAKER_01
Uh, Junie.
4
SPEAKER_00
Juniper, what s up?
4
SPEAKER_00
How can I get you today, Juniper?
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so am I the asshole for, uh, spending money to, for my ex-boyfriend s favorite streamer to cuss him out?
4
SPEAKER_00
You sent money to your ex-boyfriend s favorite streamer to cuss him out.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_01
Was it that psychotic?
4
SPEAKER_00
Who s your ex-boyfriend s favorite streamer?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, I honestly don t even remember, but it was like a, like not even a really popular one.
4
SPEAKER_00
How long ago was this?
4
SPEAKER_01
I want to say about like a year ago.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, why did you do it?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, because he was kind of a gaslighting piece of shit.
4
SPEAKER_01
Speed my language.
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, he would like, I smoke weed.
4
SPEAKER_01
So like, he would call me a druggy.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he would say like, I also have ADHD.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he would say that that doesn t exist.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s all in your head.
4
SPEAKER_01
All this all this personal nasty crap about me.
4
SPEAKER_01
And that that I would like never amount to anything pretty much just because I smoke weed and that I am an addict.
4
SPEAKER_00
How long How long were you dating this guy for about two years?
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, was he like that the whole time?
4
SPEAKER_01
Not in the beginning.
4
SPEAKER_01
We had an argument about having kids one time, and pretty much, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, he was just like, no, I got a vasectomy.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t want that shit.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, well, you couldn t tell me that in the beginning type thing?
4
SPEAKER_00
When you said you paid his favorite streamer to cuss him out, what did you exactly pay him to say?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, I told him to call him basically a piece of narcissistic shit.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
And when he did, how did that, how did that feel for you?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, the streamer didn t do it.
4
SPEAKER_01
He refunded my money, but I had a good chuckle at it that he even mentioned it.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Are you an asshole?
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t like, I don t like, am I the asshole?
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t, I m not a, I m not God.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um,
4
SPEAKER_00
But, uh...
5
SPEAKER_03
I guess I ll ask you this.
5
SPEAKER_03
So this was a year ago, right?
5
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_03
Is there any reason other than just like, oh, this would be a fun thing to talk about on here that this is like bubbling in your brain?
5
SPEAKER_02
Not exactly.
5
SPEAKER_02
I just needed an unbiased opinion about it.
5
SPEAKER_02
Cause like I told my friends about it and they re just like, they re just telling me, oh, you re just toxic.
5
SPEAKER_02
You re being toxic.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m just like, you just mentally gas lit me.
5
SPEAKER_02
So how am I the toxic one?
5
SPEAKER_03
Well, forget about like toxic for a second.
5
SPEAKER_03
It s like, like looking at it from an expenditure of energy standpoint, right?
5
SPEAKER_03
Like paying this guy to cuss out your butt.
5
SPEAKER_03
Like, okay.
5
SPEAKER_03
It s like if this guy, um, you know,
5
SPEAKER_03
hurt you by calling you all these things.
5
SPEAKER_03
And it s just like a fucking life suck for you.
5
SPEAKER_03
And you want to minimize the collateral damage that you receive from this life sucking.
5
SPEAKER_03
The expenditure of energy of paying the streamer to cuss him out
5
SPEAKER_03
In my opinion, does not contribute to that goal.
5
SPEAKER_03
And that s more important to me than whether or not you re an asshole or toxic.
5
SPEAKER_03
Does that make sense?
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, a little bit.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_03
So I go ahead.
5
SPEAKER_03
No, you go.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think I think at the time I was upset and bitter because I basically wasted like two years on this guy.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like I ve spent
5
SPEAKER_02
He was unemployed for the longest time.
5
SPEAKER_02
So I would be paying his bills.
5
SPEAKER_02
I would be, you know, basically giving him the toilet paper to wipe his shit off.
5
SPEAKER_02
So like, yeah, I, you know, smoke weed a little bit, but so what?
5
SPEAKER_02
So he had to like, throw that back in my face.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like, I don t know, maybe it was just at the time.
5
SPEAKER_02
I just wanted to get even.
5
SPEAKER_02
But now that I think about it, as you put it in a little bit perspective, it was kind of like a waste of energy, but I don t regret it.
5
SPEAKER_03
Right.
5
SPEAKER_03
And there s no need to regret it because regretting it is just like, I mean, you can, like, learn from it and be like, all right, in the future, I will I will recognize what certain things might be poor expenditures of energy, which is, by the way, tough, because sometimes sometimes you want to feel like vindicated, you know, and it s an emotional like it s an emotional decision.
5
SPEAKER_03
right?
5
SPEAKER_03
And sometimes, and that s just something you never learn.
5
SPEAKER_03
I m not going to say it s something you never learn, but like how to not make emotional decisions because you realize logically that they re poor expenditures of energy, but just in the moment they just feel so good.
5
SPEAKER_03
It takes you about,
5
SPEAKER_03
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_03
It s a hard lesson to learn.
5
SPEAKER_03
You know, it really has to be like a fucking Buddhist monk to master that.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, no, I can t be a Buddhist monk.
5
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, you probably couldn t smoke weed if you smoked if you were a Buddhist monk.
5
SPEAKER_03
Unless, no, those guys don t smoke weed.
5
SPEAKER_03
They definitely don t smoke weed.
5
SPEAKER_02
I don t think so.
5
SPEAKER_02
I work in like the cannabis field.
5
SPEAKER_02
So like,
5
SPEAKER_02
him like basically saying like that was basically saying, Oh, my, my career so far was basically a waste of my time.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I, I take pride in my worth ethic.
5
SPEAKER_02
So to say that kind of like just disrespecting me, I guess.
5
SPEAKER_02
So I just wanted to disrespect him back.
5
SPEAKER_02
You know, men suck sometimes.
5
SPEAKER_02
Not all, but some.
5
SPEAKER_03
How s your life going now?
5
SPEAKER_02
Honestly, I just got a promotion and he apparently is on welfare and apparently homeless.
5
SPEAKER_03
How d you hear that?
5
SPEAKER_02
Um, just through the grapevine.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I m taking it with a grain of salt, but from how I know how he is, I wouldn t be surprised.
5
SPEAKER_02
Cause I know he was going to court because his apartment building was trying to evict him.
5
SPEAKER_03
Um, are you, are you dating anyone new now or are you chilling, chilling single for now?
5
SPEAKER_02
Um, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_02
Like right now I don t,
5
SPEAKER_02
I am in a point in my life where I m just like, I don t want to talk to anybody.
5
SPEAKER_02
I just want to like figure myself out.
5
SPEAKER_02
Um, I feel like it wouldn t do justice for me and other people.
5
SPEAKER_03
Uh, you sound like you re doing great.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh, thank you.
5
SPEAKER_03
You do.
5
SPEAKER_03
You sound like you re doing great.
5
SPEAKER_03
Um, that s you, you, that was a very, um, confident, mentally healthy status report.
5
SPEAKER_02
I try to be, you know, you just, you have to take one day at a time.
5
SPEAKER_03
Um, so you don t remember the streamer?
5
SPEAKER_02
No, unfortunately I don t.
5
SPEAKER_02
I would have to go back on Twitch to look or Amazon or whatever it is.
5
SPEAKER_03
Well, I ll say this.
5
SPEAKER_03
While I do think it is a waste of energy to pay a streamer to cuss out your boyfriend, if you want to give me $50, I will cuss out anyone you want.
5
SPEAKER_02
Really?
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh my god, thank you.
5
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, just throwing that out there.
5
SPEAKER_02
Actually, I literally just found your stream this morning.
5
SPEAKER_02
I found your Instagram, and I was like, oh,
5
SPEAKER_02
I gotta subscribe, or at least follow.
5
SPEAKER_03
Hell yeah.
5
SPEAKER_03
Well, what s your name again?
5
SPEAKER_02
Juniper.
5
SPEAKER_03
Juniper.
5
SPEAKER_03
Juniper, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
5
SPEAKER_02
No, I m going to leave in a healing air, so I m not going to say anything bad.
5
SPEAKER_02
I just want to say thank you for letting me vent about it.
5
SPEAKER_03
Absolutely.
5
SPEAKER_03
Have a great rest of the night, Juniper.
5
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
5
SPEAKER_02
Have a good one.
5
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
5
SPEAKER_03
Was 50 too low?
5
SPEAKER_03
Or too high?
5
SPEAKER_03
Here s the thing, me cussing out somebody is worth zero dollars, but um... Ooh, alright, how about this?
5
SPEAKER_03
You can pay me a dollar and I ll compliment someone.
5
SPEAKER_03
Or maybe, should I make the insults higher priced or the compliments higher priced?
5
SPEAKER_03
I like the idea of cameo, but it s to send mean, horrible messages to people.
5
SPEAKER_03
Like cameo, but you can pay John Taffer to call your boyfriend a piece of shit.
5
SPEAKER_03
Someone should make that, that s a good idea.
5
SPEAKER_03
Hello folks, it s Lyle here.
5
SPEAKER_03
That s the end of this episode, but get this, I m releasing a bonus episode this week.
5
SPEAKER_03
That s right, an entire extra hour of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming a premium member of Therapy Gecko over at therapygecko.supercast.com.
5
SPEAKER_03
Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes, they get a completely ad-free podcast feed of the regular show, they get recordings from my live shows, members-only streams, and they help support my ability to continue doing this podcast.
5
SPEAKER_03
So here s a clip from this week s members-only bonus episode.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m honestly traumatized.
5
SPEAKER_01
Why are you traumatized?
5
SPEAKER_01
Dog peed in my mouth.
5
SPEAKER_01
Dog peed in my mouth.
5
SPEAKER_03
Tell me more about that.
5
SPEAKER_01
So I work at a animal
5
SPEAKER_01
Daycare place and a new dog came.
5
SPEAKER_01
I went to pick him up.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m six four.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m a little tall and I picked him up You just sprayed it right down the back of my throat tasted it all is awful.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s awful.
5
SPEAKER_03
Do you still remember what it tastes like?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s uh You know those uh, it s chocolate oranges.
5
SPEAKER_01
I usually get them on Christmas I don t know if anyone else does but a little bit that orange
5
SPEAKER_01
Chocolate and pennies like coins.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, make sure that not too great.
5
SPEAKER_03
Well, it s weird because you kind of um Like did you open your mouth?
5
SPEAKER_03
Like were you like were you were you surprised you were like, oh, what a dog What a cool dog and you just had your mouth open.
5
SPEAKER_01
It was like a open mouth smile because I was you know, I was excited a little puppy and
5
SPEAKER_01
and I guess he was a little more excited.
5
SPEAKER_03
If you want to hear this full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium member at therapygecko.supercast.com or find the link in the episode description.
5
SPEAKER_03
That s therapygecko.supercast.com.
5
SPEAKER_03
Alright, I have nothing else to say.
5
SPEAKER_00
Phone calls every night.
5
SPEAKER_00
Therapy get those joints right.
5
SPEAKER_00
He s teaching you how to live your life.
5
SPEAKER_00
But he s not really an expert.