0
SPEAKER_00
Hello Yeah, who s this oh my god, this is Jade I ve been like trying to call for like two years what the fuck Jade what s going on?
0
SPEAKER_00
How s life?
0
SPEAKER_00
Not a car Life is terrible.
0
SPEAKER_00
I ve it s been rough, man Why I so I just lost my job that s cool place have been working at and
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SPEAKER_00
was like, hey, we ve got to do budget cuts, we ve got to fire someone.
0
SPEAKER_00
That wasn t someone s view.
0
SPEAKER_00
I was like, man, that sucks.
0
SPEAKER_00
And I cried about it.
0
SPEAKER_00
And then I ve been applying to a lot of jobs and no one is hiring.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you know what I just it just really um It s so crazy that we need money To live this is working.
0
SPEAKER_01
This is I m gonna get into like I don t know anything about economics or life or politics or whatever, but it s like it s just shouldn t we have there s enough food and stuff and like you know and
0
SPEAKER_01
We re gonna should we get robots to just do everything for us, and then we can each haul of enough to just like hang out You know is this crazy that we need to we need to work to live Or maybe it s not crazy.
0
SPEAKER_01
Maybe it makes sense, and I m dumb.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t know I mean for me personally I
0
SPEAKER_00
I like working, having just a thing to do.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s important.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s beneficial for me.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
It s an important thing, you know?
0
SPEAKER_00
Uh, but on the other hand, it s like this fucking sucks at all times that I m at work.
0
SPEAKER_00
I want to fucking kill myself.
0
SPEAKER_00
Can I say that anyways?
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, yeah, it s rough, dude.
0
SPEAKER_00
And I mean like I m taking care of my girlfriend.
0
SPEAKER_00
She s like super disabled.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, I, she s also pregnant right now, which is a little crazy.
0
SPEAKER_01
It is crazy.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m really scared about that.
0
SPEAKER_00
She has metal rods in her legs.
0
SPEAKER_00
So there s like a chance and like a plate in her hip.
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SPEAKER_00
There s a chance like when she gives birth, like, legs could just like explode, you know?
0
SPEAKER_00
Which would not be very epic, I don t think.
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, it d be a little epic.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I d be kind of cool in like an explosion.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t think it d be good, but if you re using the word epic, I think it would be a little epic.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
It s an explosion.
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SPEAKER_00
A little bit.
0
SPEAKER_01
What job were you fired from?
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SPEAKER_00
It was basically a line cook position at like a pizza place.
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SPEAKER_00
All I did every day was I was the dough person.
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SPEAKER_00
I would make dough and fucking cut it into the circles.
0
SPEAKER_00
They can make the pizzas.
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SPEAKER_00
But, uh, yeah, I mean, actually my family is very Italian.
0
SPEAKER_00
Um, unfortunately through inbreeding, but I think my great grandparents are first cousins.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, but are you, are you, were your, your parents weren t cousins?
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SPEAKER_01
Were they?
0
SPEAKER_00
No, thank God.
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SPEAKER_00
I feel like I d be like twice as fucked out as my parents were like related.
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SPEAKER_00
I m not already.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean like I m autistic as shit.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m schizophrenic.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s not not a good combination there Well, you seem cool to me Well, unfortunately jobs do not think so, I mean why why do you think jobs don t think that you re cool When I mean I ve noticed a lot of interviews when jobs are
0
SPEAKER_00
realize that you are not, I don t want to say normal, but like, if you re a little bit weird or like a little bit strange, Drop s going to be like,
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, here s the thing, Jade.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, we ve been talking for about four minutes now, and I don t know who you are.
0
SPEAKER_01
So, I mean, I just, from the other end of the table, you are somebody, if you hadn t have told me that there was anything going on, my first impression of you, just from speaking to you, would not be that there was anything grossly abnormal about you.
0
SPEAKER_00
Well, uh, that is very kind to hear.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um, unfortunately I do not have any pizza places that I own that you can work at, but if I did, I d hire you.
0
SPEAKER_00
You know, that s, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s like, I m not even getting interviews, which is the fucked up part.
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SPEAKER_00
It s like, I have a good resume.
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SPEAKER_00
I have like five, six years of restaurant experience.
0
SPEAKER_00
Like what the fuck am I supposed to do?
0
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s so hard.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s so hard.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s like funny.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s it, you know It s hard to get any kind of job even Like, you know, there s all these people out there like trying to be you know for youtubers or actors or Artists or whatever and everyone s like, oh you have you got to know somebody it s so hard But it s hard to get a fucking job at a pizza place, dude.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s hard to get a job anywhere.
0
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s hard It s fucking hard man.
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SPEAKER_01
I feel you
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SPEAKER_00
like a walk into a place, like I walked into this, um, this fucking restaurant of like a week ago.
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SPEAKER_00
I m like, Hey, are you guys hiring?
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SPEAKER_00
And they re like, yes, we are super urgently hiring.
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SPEAKER_00
We need someone in the kitchen.
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SPEAKER_00
I m like, well, here s my resume.
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SPEAKER_00
I have five years of experience.
0
SPEAKER_00
And then they didn t fucking call me back.
0
SPEAKER_00
What?
0
SPEAKER_01
Like, I don t, I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_01
What is your girlfriend do?
0
SPEAKER_00
She, so she works part time at a, like a fish store.
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SPEAKER_00
Um,
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SPEAKER_00
I guess you could call it like an exotic fish store.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s got like salt water on one side, fresh water on the other.
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SPEAKER_00
Same with my roommate, who s also technically gonna be a second, well, third parent to the kid.
0
SPEAKER_00
Cause he can have kids, like he s infertile and he s always wanted a kid.
0
SPEAKER_00
So we re like, you know, you can help raise our kid.
0
SPEAKER_01
Wait, so the third parent, whose, whose vagina is the baby coming out of?
0
SPEAKER_00
My girlfriend s.
0
SPEAKER_01
okay so okay well you said third parent i was like is there a double penetration thing going on where it s like so let s just cut it down the middle yeah fuck it now he just uh he always wanted to have a kid and we re like you know you can
0
SPEAKER_00
be basically another dad to the kid.
0
SPEAKER_01
Wait, for real?
0
SPEAKER_01
The roommate is just like, hey, you guys are having a kid.
0
SPEAKER_01
That looks pretty cool.
0
SPEAKER_01
Can I have a little piece of your kid?
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SPEAKER_01
Like he s asking for a bite of your food, but with your kid.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it was pretty much as casual as that.
0
SPEAKER_00
We were like, you know what?
0
SPEAKER_00
We could use the help around, you know?
0
SPEAKER_01
How do you know this roommate?
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SPEAKER_01
This isn t just like a Craigslist roommate, is it?
0
SPEAKER_00
No, fuck no.
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SPEAKER_00
So he went to my high school.
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SPEAKER_00
And then I, like, didn t see him for a while.
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SPEAKER_00
And then it turns out he started working with my girlfriend at the fish store.
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SPEAKER_00
And he needed a place to be a roommate.
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SPEAKER_00
And I m like, I already know him.
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SPEAKER_00
You already know him.
0
SPEAKER_00
Might as well.
0
SPEAKER_00
And then it went from there.
0
SPEAKER_01
So I guess I don t understand, like, how this man has purchased shares of your child.
0
SPEAKER_01
Like, he s just... He s just a dad?
0
SPEAKER_01
What s the arrangement here?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he s just like... It s like, uh... Oh my god, what?
0
SPEAKER_00
There s a show where there s multiple dads to, like, multiple kids.
0
SPEAKER_00
I can t even remember what it is.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s some sitcom.
0
SPEAKER_00
But anyways, it s just like he... The kid s gonna call him dad.
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SPEAKER_00
The kid s gonna call...
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SPEAKER_00
My girlfriend, mom, called me mom.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, not that... Not that crazy.
0
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_01
So the kid will have two moms and one dad.
0
SPEAKER_01
Two moms, one dad, yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
And the dad, he s just... It ll make parent-teacher conferences a little awkward, but... So your friend from high school is just down to be your kid s dad?
0
SPEAKER_01
He s not... You guys aren t in, like, a whole poly-crazy thing, are you?
0
SPEAKER_00
No.
0
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_00
Like, that was specifically something he requested.
0
SPEAKER_00
He was like, I do not want to be in a relationship with either of you.
0
SPEAKER_00
No offense, but, um, we re like in a, he doesn t like date people.
0
SPEAKER_01
So he can kind of, he can, he can sort of dip out at any time he wants, you know, he s not even like a real dad.
0
SPEAKER_00
Technically, technically he could, but I don t think he will.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, he s like super excited about the whole thing.
0
SPEAKER_00
He s wanted a kid ever since.
0
SPEAKER_00
a long time, you know?
0
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, it s a weird little situation we got, but... Okay.
0
SPEAKER_00
It all works out.
0
SPEAKER_01
Um... That s crazy that, like, in whatever state you live in, it s easier to, like, become some kid s dad without doing anything than it is to get a job at a pizza place.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s what I m saying, dude.
0
SPEAKER_00
I mean...
1
SPEAKER_00
Is he gonna pay for the kid?
1
SPEAKER_00
Is he helping pay for the kid?
1
SPEAKER_00
Is he, like, financially supporting you?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
He is financially supporting.
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SPEAKER_01
I mean, he s already, like, bought stuff for the kid preemptively.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, baby crib.
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SPEAKER_01
Get the fuck off the counter!
1
SPEAKER_01
Sorry, my cat.
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SPEAKER_01
Um, uh, baby... I thought it was the guy.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s just on the fucking counter.
1
SPEAKER_01
They re actually both at work right now.
1
SPEAKER_01
But, yeah, basically he wants to financially support, be there, like, emotionally for the kid, help do everything, you know?
1
SPEAKER_01
And I think it s good, because, like, having three parents is better than two.
1
SPEAKER_00
I suppose so.
1
SPEAKER_00
I suppose it takes... It takes, uh... It takes a roommate.
1
SPEAKER_01
True.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, unless you make the kid, like, three times as fucked up, then I don t think that s good.
1
SPEAKER_01
okay well um what was the kid an accident or did you plan the kid so we did plan the kid um what s it called uh but we ve been telling everyone we didn t plan the kid because well it was mostly my girlfriend who said that because she was uh very scared that people would judge us because we aren t
1
SPEAKER_01
the most financially well off.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, even now, considering I just lost my job, but, um, like we have our own place, but it s, it s definitely been a struggle money wise.
1
SPEAKER_01
Um, but we re working on it.
1
SPEAKER_01
We re getting there.
1
SPEAKER_00
And so, okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
So it was planned, but you re telling people it wasn t.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yes, basically.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay, because you re afraid that they will judge you for having a kid without being, like, financially stable?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
For sure.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
How long have you been planning on having a kid for?
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I wouldn t say ever since we ve started dating, but, like, the idea s floated around.
1
SPEAKER_01
But I guess, like, just this year, we ve been really set on planning it, having it happen.
1
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
And well, I mean I get look I mean, I guess you have three incomes does the does the Does the guy is the guy of a job the roommate?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yes, he he works at the same place.
1
SPEAKER_01
My girlfriend does okay, so that s also convenient with like rides and everything and Yeah, I mean Speaking s difficult anyways I
1
SPEAKER_01
Three incomes is good, but it s also bad.
1
SPEAKER_01
Cause if we apply for financial aid through the government, I mean, I suppose we could leave off the roommate, but like, it ll still show based on like legal filings and everything that like a third person lives here, which makes our chances for like food stamps and insurance and stuff a lot slimmer in some regards.
1
SPEAKER_00
How old are you guys?
1
SPEAKER_01
Uh, so I am 20.
1
SPEAKER_01
My girlfriend is 24 and the roommate is 22.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, is this something you ve always wanted to do?
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I ve wanted kids most because like, I m in a mindset of, I want a kid to make sure that kid grows up a lot better than I did.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know, cause my parents were like fucking horrible.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I was adopted when I was young.
1
SPEAKER_01
Uh, went to my aunt and uncle who were the people that adopted me.
1
SPEAKER_01
They were just fucking batshit terrible, you know?
1
SPEAKER_01
But yeah, having a kid to make up for that, I guess, but also like having a kid s cool, you know, just having to have a little guy run around.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um, well,
1
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I, I, I hope you find your way into a happy life, Jade.
1
SPEAKER_00
I really do.
1
SPEAKER_01
I do too.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s just, it feels like every step of my life, every time I get to a point where I m like, I m happy, everything s going great.
1
SPEAKER_01
It just like taken away immediately.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, like I ve been laid off from so many jobs for like similar reasons or like
1
SPEAKER_01
God, the last two places I worked at fuckin  shut down.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, they were both restaurants that, like, couldn t survive, um, financially.
1
SPEAKER_01
So.
1
Mm-hmm.
1
SPEAKER_01
Which also doesn t look good on a resume, but.
1
SPEAKER_00
When, why, why do you, why do you feel like you become happy and then things, and then the, you, you, you feel as though the, the, the carpet is always being, um, pulled from underneath you?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I mean it, because I ll get to points in my life where,
1
SPEAKER_01
Because for me, like, change is really hard.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, I like having a set schedule, having it so I know exactly what s going to happen when it happens.
1
SPEAKER_01
You know?
1
SPEAKER_01
And, like, right as I feel like I ve gotten to the point where I have a routine again, I know everything s going to be alright, I m financially stable, some shit happens.
1
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Um...
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, again, I mean, Jade, you got a lot working.
1
SPEAKER_00
I think, look, like I said, I think that you present as a perfectly competent human being that if I owned a grocery store or cafe or bar or restaurant, I would have you there.
1
SPEAKER_00
whipping up cocktails putting parmesan on on on pizza you know it sucks is the job market is just so um so fucked man this is so hard to uh yeah it is you know and it s not like yeah and it s not like i can t like adapt to the change i mean i do every time i um i learn to level out but it always just
1
SPEAKER_01
It sucks.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s not that I m upset about it, it sucks, you know?
1
SPEAKER_01
It s like... I can deal with it, but I don t get to complain about it, you know?
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, look, everything changes when you have a kid, right?
1
SPEAKER_00
Everything changes when you have a kid, and then your life really just isn t about... It s unfortunate, and maybe I m talking on my ass here, I ve never had a child before, but it just seems to me abstractly that once you have a kid, your life just...
1
SPEAKER_00
for at least a little while is no longer about you and your happiness, right?
1
SPEAKER_00
Because you made the decision to bring another kid into a universe which is maybe the most amount of responsibility a human being can take on, right?
1
SPEAKER_00
And so you gotta make sacrifices to
1
SPEAKER_00
take on that responsibility.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I don t, maybe sometimes that involves sacrificing your happiness a little bit, you know, and hopefully you don t take that out on, on the kid.
1
SPEAKER_00
Right.
1
SPEAKER_00
Cause I mean, it s, it s a re it s the hugest decision a person could possibly make.
1
SPEAKER_00
Sure.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I ve, I ve come to terms with that, that like, this is a big decision in my life that although other people, like a lot of people in my life, when I ve told them like, Hey, my girlfriend s pregnant,
1
SPEAKER_01
the first thing that they bring up is you re unprepared or like something along the lines of a lot of things people bring up is because I have these mental issues because I m autistic they re like for one I don t think you re ready to have that kid you know but on the other hand it s like uh are you sure your kid s not gonna be like autistic as shit and I m like well if the kid is I don t think that s a bad thing you know but I would put I I I would I mean I would
1
SPEAKER_00
Whatever whatever whatever mental issues that you re struggling with I would put them at the very bottom of the list of You know things to be Thinking about it in this in this regard and I mean, you know, I think it s important to be generally stable If you re gonna be in charge of a kid, but but again again, yeah, you know, look I hope Go ahead.
1
SPEAKER_00
You re gonna say something
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I was gonna say other than like the job situation like the rest of my life has been like Good if that makes sense.
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean like I ve been on medication for like 15 probably 15 years I mean ever since I was a kid Making sure like mental health
2
SPEAKER_02
super stable it s just that it s hard you know it s hard and it sucks but I got to get through it you know well Jade all I can tell you is good luck I hope that you fight for there s a piece to put what state do you live in I live in Indiana
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, if there s a pizza place in Indiana, if maybe the owner of Tony s Pizza in Indiana is a huge Therapy Gecko fan, then he can get you a job.
2
SPEAKER_00
I hope that works out that way.
2
SPEAKER_00
You can get a job the way that people used to fucking get jobs in the 80s.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hey, I heard you on The Lizard Show.
2
SPEAKER_00
Come make pizzas for me.
2
SPEAKER_02
God.
2
SPEAKER_00
Jade, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer or about the situation in general before we go?
2
SPEAKER_02
Someone in chat asked, is the girlfriend hot?
2
SPEAKER_02
Maybe?
2
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_02
What I have to say, I have to say is, I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, you got that going for you.
2
SPEAKER_00
You don t know if your girlfriend s hot.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s a cool mystery to that that I think is good to have.
2
SPEAKER_02
True.
2
SPEAKER_02
Take care, Jade.
2
SPEAKER_02
You take care.
2
SPEAKER_02
I love you, Lyle.
2
SPEAKER_02
You re an awesome gecko.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Good luck with everything.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m rooting for you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what favor I have with the Lord, but I ll try to call it in for you.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Take care, Jade.
2
SPEAKER_02
Bye-bye.
2
SPEAKER_00
Dude, I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I just like... And it s not judgment.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t like to... I try not to cast judgments on what other people decide to do with their lives.
2
SPEAKER_00
And it has nothing to do with, you know, being autistic or anything to do with, like, having the roommate dad situation.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s just like...
2
SPEAKER_00
I know it s just so it s just such a like I don t know it s just a crazy crazy it s a it s like the biggest decision or responsibility I think you could possibly take on to have a kid you know and and and especially being 20 and
2
SPEAKER_00
All that, but at the end of the day, look, man, I don t live Jade s life, I don t know what it s like to be them, I don t know anything about what brings them happiness in their life, and the universe is ripe, and so, I don t know, all I know is that I hope that everything works out for Jade, and that they, you know, are able to find a place to make pizzas, and raise the kid, and I don t know what the roommate s doing.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if he has some weird plan.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if he s going to kidnap the kid and, you know, try to clone him and make an Oompa Loompa Willy Wonka factory, whatever thing, but I don t know what he s doing, but I hope that everything works out.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_00
And, uh, good luck to you, Jade.
2
SPEAKER_02
Hello.
2
SPEAKER_01
Hey, um, yeah, um, I just had a question.
2
SPEAKER_01
I ve been having some like issues, like I mentally, like, I don t really know what to do.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
What s what s going on, man.
2
SPEAKER_01
So, um, my girlfriend, like she s a real pothead, um, and I ve never smoked myself.
2
SPEAKER_01
Um, but she keeps trying to convince me.
2
SPEAKER_01
to smoke weed and I m kind of worried about it, but she keeps kind of up in the ante and like offering to do certain things if I were to smoke with her, such as, do you know what a beeper bong is?
2
SPEAKER_00
No, what s a beeper bong?
2
SPEAKER_01
So apparently it s this thing that
2
SPEAKER_01
goes inside of the woman and you put water in the woman as well and like the stem goes down into the water and you make pretty much a human bong um so your girlfriend wants you to take a bong rip out of her pussy pretty much yeah so i i ve considered it but like at the same time like
2
SPEAKER_01
I just don t know what to do, because, like, it sounds interesting, but I don t want to have a bad trip or anything.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I don t know if you smoke weed, but, like, I m just kind of confused.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, on what to do, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
What kind of bad trip are you afraid of having?
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, I always heard about, like, paranoia and, like,
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I m already kind of an anxious person.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, but maybe I want to go as like for my first time.
2
SPEAKER_01
Maybe I want to be as extreme to do something like a beaver bong.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, like, I just kind of got to get over this mental block.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hmm.
2
SPEAKER_00
What are you paranoid could happen?
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, um, just feeling kind of like, uh, um, like, you know, that fucking thing where like, you think you re have something wrong with you, but like, you don t really, I forgot what it s called, like kind of, uh, I forgot what it s called, but I have a feeling, you know what I m talking about?
2
SPEAKER_01
Um, like just pretty much the,
2
SPEAKER_01
your brain making up like, oh, I might be having a heart attack, like something s wrong, blah, blah, blah, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
You know, um, everyone has their own experience with drugs, but a little part of me thinks that, um, you re gonna like take this sponge rip out of your girlfriend s vagina, breathe it in.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then when you blow it out, you ll look at her and, um, you ll realize that life is actually pretty good.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, yeah, I might just have to try that.
2
SPEAKER_01
Should I shotgun the hit as well?
2
SPEAKER_01
Blow it into her mouth for mine?
2
SPEAKER_00
You guys need to write a book about your lives.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is there a baby?
2
SPEAKER_00
You guys have a baby?
2
SPEAKER_00
Don t tell me you two have a baby together.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Dude, next, here s the thing, here s the thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
It starts with your girlfriend trying to get you to take a bong rip out of her vagina, and then all of a sudden she s gonna be like, yo, let s pack the baby.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, I don t think it s gonna go that far, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
Nah, like, I feel like the top, like, you could, like, kinda push on the top of a baby s head to make a little dent, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
And then pack some weed into that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, like a soda can.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, like a soda can, and then pack some weed into that, and then you smoke it out of the baby s mouth.
2
SPEAKER_01
Uh, I mean, I don t think I d ever try that, but that s definitely an interesting thought.
2
SPEAKER_01
Um, I might just stick with a beaver bong.
2
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again?
2
SPEAKER_01
Ryan.
2
SPEAKER_00
Ryan, you re a man of integrity, and I respect you.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, thank you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
2
SPEAKER_01
Uh, I hope that the chats are entertaining after this.
2
SPEAKER_00
Take care, man.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you too.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s gonna be my new Tinder bio.
2
SPEAKER_00
Looking for someone to do a beaver bong with.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hey, this is a message to all New York City or Seattle-based therapy gecko listeners.
2
SPEAKER_00
I am very excited to announce that this New Year s Eve, I will be hosting my very first reptile rave.
2
SPEAKER_00
in the Lower East Side of Manhattan.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, that s right, I am hosting a rave.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve hired a DJ, I ve instructed him to play forest disco music, whatever the hell that means, and I m gonna be there, dancing around and shaking my lizard tail.
2
SPEAKER_00
I have never done something like this before, I m very excited to see how it goes, and if you live in New York City, I hope to see you there.
2
SPEAKER_00
Please check the episode description of this podcast for more details.
2
SPEAKER_00
Also, I ll be putting on another reptile rave in season 2.
3
SPEAKER_01
Seattle on January 6th, and you can find the info for that in the episode description as well.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s gecko party time, baby.
3
SPEAKER_02
Hello?
3
SPEAKER_01
What s up?
3
SPEAKER_01
How s it going?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, who s this?
3
SPEAKER_00
Trey, what s going on, dude?
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, not a whole lot.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s a cool name, Trey.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, with an A-E, too.
3
SPEAKER_01
Trey with an A-E.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, T-R-A-E.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Hmm.
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, what s up, Trey?
3
SPEAKER_01
What do you want to talk about today, if anything?
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, well, there s some heavy shit on my plate.
3
SPEAKER_00
But for starters, like, I m a garbage man.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s a pretty fun job.
3
SPEAKER_01
Um, any cool pieces of garbage to report to us that you found lately?
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, not really.
3
SPEAKER_00
I find random money sometimes.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think I got like 50 bucks in total.
3
SPEAKER_01
Why do you think somebody threw away 50 bucks?
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, I find like fucking cleaned out wallets with just like random money left in them.
3
SPEAKER_00
One time I saw a pocket pussy.
3
SPEAKER_00
That was kind of weird.
3
SPEAKER_01
would you do with it?
3
SPEAKER_00
I just took a picture and posted on my story.
3
SPEAKER_01
Right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Why would you do anything else?
3
SPEAKER_01
You wouldn t take it home and fuck it?
3
SPEAKER_01
Why?
3
SPEAKER_01
Why did that even?
3
SPEAKER_01
Why did they even come into my brain that you would do that?
3
SPEAKER_01
Trey?
3
SPEAKER_01
That s, that s on me.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m going to take responsibility.
3
SPEAKER_00
But uh, yeah, dude, I do have some kind of deep shit.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, so growing up, I kind of had to like, take on adult responsibilities really early.
3
SPEAKER_00
And, uh, kind of like help keep the family together and stuff.
3
SPEAKER_00
And, uh, now fast forward to like present day, it s just like, um, I m taking care of my mom s house, paying the loan on it.
3
SPEAKER_00
And she s out fucking around, like on meth and shit.
3
SPEAKER_00
And it s just a lot to take in.
3
SPEAKER_00
And stepdad s like not very able either.
3
SPEAKER_00
So I have to like take care of him and shit too.
3
SPEAKER_00
And everything just feels weird.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like I want to start my life.
3
SPEAKER_01
So what would starting your own life look like?
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, kind of just like finally starting to not care so much and like care more about myself.
3
SPEAKER_00
Just kind of give up on trying to help people.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ve endlessly tried to help for so long.
3
SPEAKER_01
Um, how old are you?
3
SPEAKER_00
I m 22.
3
SPEAKER_01
22, and you ve spent a large majority of your life having to pick up the pieces of other people s shit.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, what s between you and not caring?
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_00
There s just like this huge like moral feeling that I have to like always just try to help and be like
3
SPEAKER_00
the most good that I can be.
3
SPEAKER_00
And I don t really know how to shut that off and just, like, kind of direct that towards myself.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, man, this is a tough one, because, like, and you know, this has been kind of a recurring theme on the show throughout a couple phone calls.
3
SPEAKER_01
We had a guy a few weeks ago who was, like, taking care of his aunt, you know, stuff like that.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I always feel like
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, this is like, this is really dependent upon your own personal philosophy in a way, so I can t tell you what to do with your life in this sense, but my personal philosophy with these kinds of things is like, you know, look, I think it s very noble of you to help out your family, but you re very, very young, and how old, I mean, you re helping out, what, your mom, and tell me, who are all the people you re helping out?
3
SPEAKER_01
Sorry if you told me already.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, mostly my mom, because it s the house that I m paying for is under her name and the loan.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s like a backup plan for my stepdad, basically.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s trying to fix shit over at another house.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then just a whole lot of shit that I m tired of dealing with.
3
SPEAKER_01
Look.
3
SPEAKER_01
Here s the thing, life I think is like pretty easy and straightforward until you have children.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t have children, but I assume because it s like you can if you want to just fuck off.
3
SPEAKER_01
and fuck around and not give a shit about anyone other than yourself and go crazy and move to China and do heroin and just what and you and you and you don t have kids you can go go crazy divorce your wife leave your boyfriend block all your friends on Instagram who cares go go litter do whatever you want but when you have kids but this is different when you have kids and I think like
3
SPEAKER_01
to have a kid and then like especially when they re a child but you know now like into adulthood to have a kid and like can deprive them of their life because you just couldn t
3
SPEAKER_01
get it together for whatever reason and I don t know bro I m not an arbiter of morality and I don t want to be but like it just feels wrong and so you know you re a young dude you re 22 it sounds like you ve been like dealing with this stuff forever so I mean I d like to see you claim your own life
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, that s what you re telling me.
3
SPEAKER_01
You re telling me you re 22 and you don t feel like you have your own life.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I think, you know, you re endowed as a citizen of the universe to claim your own life.
3
SPEAKER_01
And if you have the opportunity to do so, I wouldn t
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, I d consider doing it, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
And again, I m not gonna tell you what that means in terms of your actions moving forward, because, you know, no one philosophy about this stuff is right, but I think if you were to take actions in the direction of claiming your own life, I don t think that would be selfish of you, and I don t think that you d be wrong to do so.
3
SPEAKER_00
and a
3
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I wish you the courage to do whatever you think is the best thing to do.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s the thing, man.
3
SPEAKER_01
You can really, like, like, ah, you can really fuck around.
3
SPEAKER_01
You can, you can be like a selfish asshole to your friends and your, just everyone around you.
3
SPEAKER_01
It doesn t, it s fine until you have a kid.
3
SPEAKER_01
You know?
3
SPEAKER_01
When you have a kid, because when you have a kid and then you make their lives shitty, that s just a sinister thing to do.
3
SPEAKER_01
So, you know.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t know your mom.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m not saying your mom is a sinister person.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m just... I don t know your particular situation.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m just talking about general shit.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think it s menopause s fault.
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, um... I mean, is there any other stuff you wanted to talk about or anything further in this situation or... What s up?
3
SPEAKER_01
The floor is yours.
3
SPEAKER_00
Man, I mean...
3
SPEAKER_00
It s really just an honor to actually be talking to you.
3
SPEAKER_00
Every morning before I go to work, like I go to work like half an hour early, I just throw in a podcast and I really just start my day.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t even listen to music anymore.
3
SPEAKER_00
My whole thing has just been listening to you.
3
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, I love the whole community that you ve started.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thanks, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s crazy to be talking to you.
3
SPEAKER_01
Trey, I say this genuinely.
3
SPEAKER_01
It is crazy to be talking to you too, man.
3
SPEAKER_01
Uh, is there anything else you want to say to the people of the computer before we go?
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, yeah, absolutely.
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, shout out Devin.
3
SPEAKER_00
Shout out Luke.
3
SPEAKER_00
Shout out Weston.
3
SPEAKER_00
Shout out Andrew.
3
SPEAKER_00
Uh, my handle on Insta is Trey Tricky Way.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s Trey with an A E and uh, thanks for having me dog.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thanks man.
3
SPEAKER_01
Go do a kickflip, Trey.
3
SPEAKER_01
You sound like you do a lot of kickflips.
3
SPEAKER_00
Have a good night.
3
SPEAKER_00
I do.
3
SPEAKER_00
You too, dawg.
3
SPEAKER_02
Hello?
4
SPEAKER_02
me.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hi.
4
SPEAKER_02
How are you?
4
SPEAKER_00
I m good.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again?
4
SPEAKER_02
Sophie.
4
SPEAKER_00
Sophie.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s cracking?
4
SPEAKER_00
How s life?
4
SPEAKER_02
I m in the middle of finals week and I don t want to study.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I m calling you.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, um, I, you know, um,
4
SPEAKER_00
I, it s hard making this podcast and stuff.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, and I, I get frustrated in, in my day to day life pretty often.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, not, not even just like with, with work and stuff, but also with like, you know, life and, and, and people and this and that and the other thing, just, you know, there s all these, there s all these things.
4
SPEAKER_00
And, um,
4
SPEAKER_00
I think, like, I am too out of- I need to regain some perspective, because still, in my adult life, even though it has its own stuff, I m just so glad.
4
SPEAKER_00
So happy.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m honestly- I m feeling it right now, talking to you.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m so happy that I never, ever, ever in my life have to go to school ever again.
4
SPEAKER_00
No, it might be the worst thing ever.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s horrible.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s so bad.
4
SPEAKER_00
What do you do?
4
SPEAKER_00
What are you in?
4
SPEAKER_00
You re in college, right?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I m in college.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m studying biomedical engineering.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god, that sounds awful.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m so happy.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know what?
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t even care that this sounds mean.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m really happy that I m not you doing that.
4
SPEAKER_02
No, you should be.
4
SPEAKER_02
You should be.
4
SPEAKER_02
I should have done music education instead.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_00
I ll be homeless when I m 40 and you ll have like a real place to live.
4
SPEAKER_00
But, you know, for now, I m chilling.
4
SPEAKER_00
What made you want to do all that?
4
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_02
I just like really want to make a difference in the world.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I don t think I could ever handle being like a doctor.
4
SPEAKER_02
Like that shit s crazy.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you said you should have done education?
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, music education.
4
SPEAKER_00
Why don t you go do that?
4
SPEAKER_02
I could.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s really tempting.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m not going to lie.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
Why?
4
SPEAKER_00
What s stopping you?
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, that s a good question.
4
SPEAKER_02
Probably like the fear of my dad hating me for being a failure.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s a stupid reason.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, probably.
4
SPEAKER_02
But he does fund my education.
4
SPEAKER_00
I Respect the fact that he funds your education and and that is a that Look, I think and the reason I snap judgment said that that s a stupid reason is and I don t take that back is because basing your entire life on
4
SPEAKER_00
future and day-to-day on like what your parents will think about it is just like a way to be forever unhappy I respect the fact that you care about your dad s opinion because he s funding your education and you know his money his prerogative to you know whatever say hey I ll only fund your education if you you know do this that and the other thing you know that s his
4
SPEAKER_00
Whatever leverage have a right or wrong you think that might be that s just whatever it is, but um all of that aside You know you re your own independent human being with your own life And you know you you re at the end of the day nobody has to fucking live your life and and do all the horrible school things But you so you know I I kind of don t give a fuck what your dad thinks Now you re so right, I think that s like something I struggle with is I give too much of a fuck about what other people think
4
SPEAKER_00
So you want to, by the way, I don t want to discount it.
4
SPEAKER_00
I know it s like having these kinds of conversations, especially if you haven t had them before, I know they re hard.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t want to discount that it s hard and that s one of the reasons you might be not doing it.
4
SPEAKER_00
But like, I mean, it d be one thing if you told me that you were doing all of this shit because you want to, you genuinely want to be a,
4
SPEAKER_00
biomedical Willy Wonka person or you know, or you genuinely want to make a lot of money and you think that s how you do it.
4
SPEAKER_00
But if you re just doing it to make your dad happy, I mean, what the fuck are we doing here?
4
SPEAKER_02
No, I am doing it because I like it.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s just like, it s just so much like I m drowning in work right now.
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, let s see.
4
SPEAKER_00
You want it to be an art education person?
4
SPEAKER_02
Music.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s stopping you?
4
SPEAKER_02
Nothing.
4
SPEAKER_02
You re so right.
4
SPEAKER_02
Maybe I ll double major.
4
SPEAKER_02
Or I could just drop out and become a music teacher.
4
SPEAKER_00
You could.
4
SPEAKER_02
Alright, that s all.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hey, I got a question.
4
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
4
SPEAKER_00
What note is this?
4
SPEAKER_02
You know what?
4
SPEAKER_02
I couldn t even tell you.
4
SPEAKER_00
Sounds like a lot of work to do.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s your name again?
4
SPEAKER_00
Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
4
SPEAKER_02
My name s Sophie.
4
SPEAKER_02
Thank you, everybody, for listening to my existential crisis.
4
SPEAKER_00
Bye Sophie, I hope that you figure it out and I hope that this conversation was at least... Like, at least 3 out of 10 helpful.
4
SPEAKER_02
It was, thank you Lyle.
4
SPEAKER_00
Rock and roll, see ya.
4
SPEAKER_02
Bye bye.
4
SPEAKER_00
By the way, I already knew the answer.
4
SPEAKER_00
It was a G. Where are you all from?
4
SPEAKER_00
Edwin.
4
SPEAKER_00
Hello?
4
SPEAKER_01
Hello?
4
SPEAKER_01
Am I still on?
4
SPEAKER_00
Uh, I don t know what you mean by, are you still on?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, it made it seem like it was going to hang up on me.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t know what you mean when you re referring to an it.
4
SPEAKER_00
Let s live in the present.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s your name, sir?
4
SPEAKER_00
Edwin.
4
SPEAKER_00
Eddie.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s going on, Eddie?
4
SPEAKER_00
How can I get you today?
4
SPEAKER_00
What d you want to talk about?
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh man.
4
SPEAKER_01
What, what can you get me today?
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, well,
4
SPEAKER_01
I m 22 and I m already getting divorced.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s very funny because I don t know, I don t know the exact demographics of this podcast or whatever, but I do know that, you know, a lot of people, they found out about it from TikTok or whatever the fuck.
4
SPEAKER_00
And so there are a lot of like people in the 18 to, you know, 24 year old range.
4
SPEAKER_00
But all you guys are acting like you re, you know, in your fucking forties, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
Everyone s having kids.
4
SPEAKER_00
Everyone s getting divorced.
4
SPEAKER_00
Everyone s like, I mean, it s just, it s, it s wild, man.
4
SPEAKER_00
What s going on?
4
SPEAKER_01
Our generation, like, we just all had such a weird connection with the internet.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we re all like at another level of intelligence and like wisdom on stuff.
4
SPEAKER_01
So it s, it s like, like a crazy level of attachment with other people.
4
SPEAKER_00
I guess.
4
SPEAKER_00
How long were you married?
4
SPEAKER_01
Uh, two years, but we were, uh, we met when we were 13.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we ve been together for nine years in total.
4
SPEAKER_01
But uh, yeah, two years for the like actual marriage.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, good.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, I hold my tongue out so much.
4
SPEAKER_00
I really do.
4
SPEAKER_00
Uh, because not because I m like afraid of what people will think of my judgments, but because like, you know, like my gut emotional reaction to when people say things like this is like my, my, it s my true gut emotional reaction is like,
4
SPEAKER_00
I just think it s a terrible idea to get married at a young age and have kids at a crazy young age.
4
SPEAKER_00
But beneath the emotion, I logically understand and believe that different things make different people happy.
4
SPEAKER_00
And so I m not in a position to make those calls.
4
SPEAKER_00
But I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, it s really hard to say.
4
SPEAKER_01
I put a lot of effort and time into thinking if, because we were engaged for probably two years before I actually committed to signing anything and stuff, not in like hesitation of like, Oh, I don t believe our relationship s going to last that long.
4
SPEAKER_01
I fully believe we would last.
4
SPEAKER_01
Um, but like, I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
I actually took the time to think about what I wanted for the rest of my life and was like, Oh, dang.
4
SPEAKER_01
Maybe this isn t the solution. 
4
SPEAKER_01
And I went through with it because I was genuinely happy with her.
4
SPEAKER_01
And it kind of sucks that it went in the worst way possible and it s not
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it s a mutual thing now, but it was a mess for the past couple months.
5
SPEAKER_00
This whole year entirely actually was awful.
5
SPEAKER_01
So what are you doing now?
5
SPEAKER_00
Uh, kind of just sitting around spending money.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t have, um, what on, I just bought a new PC and I just got the desk today and then I m still waiting for some parts.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I m going to be building that, but you know, using a firm,
5
SPEAKER_00
to pay for stuff when I don t have any money.
5
SPEAKER_00
But I m working all the time, so you know, that s fun.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Hey man, some people would argue having a nice PC, it s better than having a wife, huh?
5
SPEAKER_00
Oof.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s a loaded assumption.
5
SPEAKER_01
I think, well, whatever.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay, what are you going to do on your PC?
5
SPEAKER_00
Game, mostly.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I have kind of an IT background, and I kind of want to get back into it.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t know how much having a PC is going to help me with that, but it would be nice to get back into IT.
5
SPEAKER_00
Especially money-wise.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do you have a job now?
5
SPEAKER_00
Uh, yeah, I work at a warehouse currently.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
5
SPEAKER_01
What state are you guys in?
5
SPEAKER_00
I am in Maryland.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s my home state.
5
SPEAKER_01
You sound, um, you sound distraught, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
Is there anything I can do to help you?
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
I have an awesome support team that s been helping me or a lot of people that have been talking through everything with me.
5
SPEAKER_00
Uh, and I m, I, I, I go to a counselor and I go to therapy, uh, and a new therapist.
5
SPEAKER_00
Cause the one I ve been going to wasn t the greatest.
5
SPEAKER_00
Uh, the advice she gave me was not amazing.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, what was the advice she gave you?
5
SPEAKER_01
I m curious.
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, I mean, because I was in denial about our relationship being over, uh, and Mike, I was fighting and fighting to try and keep stuff together.
5
SPEAKER_00
And she just suggested that I give it space and she ll come back, which I guess is sound advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
But in reality... What s wrong with that advice?
5
SPEAKER_00
At least for how much information my therapist had about the situation and like, here s another thing, we were both going to the same therapist, but for solo sessions, it wasn t like couple therapy.
5
SPEAKER_00
It was, I went to her and then she was also going to her at the same time.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s no fun.
5
SPEAKER_00
But so that would give her more context on like what I was going through, I guess.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And and I think with the information she had about our relationship, the the suggestion of giving it more space was probably the worst, at least at the time.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, again, why do you feel like that was bad?
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, just because there was
5
SPEAKER_00
She moved out to live with the guy that she cheated on me with.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I feel like me spending more time away was solidifying their relationship when I wanted things to work out still.
5
SPEAKER_01
All right, I m going to tell you something.
5
SPEAKER_01
Your therapist gave you great advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s fair.
5
SPEAKER_01
Your therapist gave you great advice, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
Come on.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, hindsight, hindsight.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m like, yeah, that was probably the best thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
If I stepped away from it and actually... I m sorry.
5
SPEAKER_01
I know you re distraught right now.
5
SPEAKER_01
I hope I don t sound like I m laughing at you.
5
SPEAKER_01
I really, I really am not.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s just, my friend, your therapist gave you fantastic advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
I just need you to know that because, you know, I know that you started out this phone call with the speech about how smart you are.
5
SPEAKER_01
And I just need you to know that your therapist gave you great advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
If your girlfriend left you to go be with the guy that she cheated on you for, um, I m going to tell you that.
5
SPEAKER_01
And, and absolutely.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s not, of course, here s the thing your therapist gave you.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s not, it s not what you wanted though.
5
SPEAKER_01
Your therapist didn t give you what you wanted because what you wanted was this gut emotional thing of your,
5
SPEAKER_01
your girlfriend coming back to you realizing that this guy s not the guy and you re the guy you know but that s not you know that s what you wanted but it s not you know what you needed or you could say right because at the end of the day it s like if if another but you deserve
5
SPEAKER_01
a person who wants to fucking be, who makes the decision to be with you and to stay with you and not to, you know, run off with.
5
SPEAKER_01
this other this other guy and at a certain point and it s hard to bro it s fucking hard it s hard emotionally to stand up for yourself it s really hard whether you re a guy or a girl it s hard to set the boundaries of like i don t deserve this bullshit i m i m out it s hard you know
5
SPEAKER_01
And so that s, that s why it felt like not good advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
It was cause it was the harder decision, but it s totally the move, you know?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Actually going through the time away and like, I don t know, it was just this week that it clicked with me that I was fighting a battle that I wasn t going to win.
5
SPEAKER_00
Um, so looking back on it now, it was great advice and I appreciated it and wish I would have taken more heart to actually listening to it.
5
SPEAKER_00
But, um, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
Again, with her being a therapist for both of us, I feel like I kind of just had a grudge where it was like, Hey, I don t know how much you re playing into me or how much you have her in mind or what, but I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, look, here s the thing.
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, that does, I don t think, I don t think that she was.
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, that s weird that she was seeing both of you guys individually.
5
SPEAKER_00
Sounds like Maryland insurance cuts right there.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s a conflict of interest right there.
5
SPEAKER_01
But again, I don t think she was, whatever she told you was in the best interest of both of you.
5
SPEAKER_01
Definitely.
5
SPEAKER_01
And my God, man, I mean, I mean, what s your name again?
5
SPEAKER_00
Edwin.
5
SPEAKER_01
Edwin.
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, God damn it, Edwin, you re only 22.
5
SPEAKER_01
And you seem you re this divorce sounds like it has truly aged you like 20 years.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I already get told that I look way older than I am.
5
SPEAKER_00
I ve had people tell me I look like 28.
5
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, I don t know facial hair and I m 63 and built like a stick.
5
SPEAKER_00
So you know.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so what I m hearing is that you can have sex with anyone you want.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wouldn t know I ve been with one person my entire life.
5
SPEAKER_01
I Mean you sound um I mean, I don t know man.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t know I look I get I understand, but you re a tall young skinny guy You know You re you re a little nerdy.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s in right now Yeah You re gonna be you re gonna do great Edwin
5
SPEAKER_00
I m excited for the opportunities I have in front of me, yes.
5
SPEAKER_00
You re going to do great.
5
SPEAKER_00
Do you want more context on the whole relationship this past year?
5
SPEAKER_00
I feel like you do.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do I want more context on the relationship?
5
SPEAKER_01
Not really.
5
SPEAKER_01
Truthfully, not really.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m going to say what I m going to say first, then I ll ask you this.
5
SPEAKER_01
Not really, because I m more interested in the present now.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m far more interested, truthfully, in your present and future life than I am in mourning your relationship.
5
SPEAKER_01
Although, again, I want to talk about whatever you want to talk about.
5
SPEAKER_01
So if the context is what you want, then go ahead.
5
SPEAKER_01
Why do you think I should be enthralled in this context?
5
SPEAKER_00
Maybe you re right.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
I feel like I have it.
5
SPEAKER_00
I have, I have a habit of sharing this right now just because it s like, please go for it.
5
SPEAKER_00
If that s what you want to do in my life for a year.
5
SPEAKER_00
So like, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_00
So, um, so we were, we worked together kind of, she s not really showing up to work.
5
SPEAKER_00
She has extended leave and stuff like that.
5
SPEAKER_00
So she s not there, but we worked together.
5
SPEAKER_00
Um, and we were in a band and, uh,
5
SPEAKER_00
I was friends with everybody in the band.
5
SPEAKER_00
We were both friends with everybody in the band.
5
SPEAKER_00
So she cheated with me with the drummer of our band.
6
SPEAKER_02
I found out a while ago, a couple months ago, probably like around April-ish.
6
SPEAKER_02
And yeah, I ve just been fighting, trying to get things to work out, go back to how they were.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, not back to how they were.
6
SPEAKER_02
I knew things would be different now, but I was willing to look past it and try to save the marriage.
6
SPEAKER_02
clearly wasn t the solution, but yeah, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
One of our friends, someone close to me, someone that I was in a band with, that we went to shows and stuff with, stabbed me in the back as well as in the front.
6
SPEAKER_02
Brutal.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
6
SPEAKER_00
You know what?
6
SPEAKER_00
I m glad that you gave me this context because now I m like, I didn t realize you were also a musician.
6
SPEAKER_00
Because, I don t know, Edwin, I don t know if you know this, and maybe, I don t know if anything I m saying is helpful to you, this is just what I m thinking about.
6
SPEAKER_00
You might be the most in-demand version of a guy right now.
6
SPEAKER_00
Do you know that?
6
SPEAKER_02
I m not the best.
6
SPEAKER_02
I play bass primarily.
6
SPEAKER_00
I have, you re, you re a, you re a six, three skinny kind of nerdy musician guy.
6
SPEAKER_00
You ve been, you ve already, you ve had a, you ve had a wife before.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s something you re like kind of the most in demand version of a guy right now.
6
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if you know that.
6
SPEAKER_02
No, I guess not.
6
SPEAKER_02
Again, we re not even, I haven t gotten divorce papers or anything yet.
6
SPEAKER_02
This is like super recent that I ve accepted the fact that it s over.
6
SPEAKER_02
So I really, I have no idea.
6
SPEAKER_00
I m a full year ahead of you.
6
SPEAKER_00
I don t even know if it s a year, but I m, I m, I m ahead of you right now in my thinking about this.
6
SPEAKER_00
I understand you re still mourning the present.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
But like, again, I ve been with her since I was 13.
6
SPEAKER_02
She s, she s my world.
6
SPEAKER_02
She s everything to me.
6
SPEAKER_02
So like, I m going to be taking my time to find myself out and stuff, but you should, I have no idea what your hell dating is going to be like for me.
6
SPEAKER_02
Cause like, I know what that dude, I know what dating is going to be like for you.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s going to be sick.
6
SPEAKER_02
I hope so.
6
SPEAKER_02
I hope so.
6
SPEAKER_00
What else man, I hope I by the way, I hope any of this is helpful I cuz I know I don t know you ve probably had a thousand people tell you that you just need to move on and I m gonna yeah Again having like so much Connection with so many people to tell me what I should be doing and stuff in my head.
6
SPEAKER_02
It was biased They re just saying that because they want to protect me.
6
SPEAKER_02
I
6
SPEAKER_02
and not our relationship or whatever, but in reality, I knew it was, it was in my best interest to let this go.
6
SPEAKER_02
Uh, so I m, I m trying to, I m trying to get past it.
6
SPEAKER_02
But every, everything that anyone s told me has been super helpful.
6
SPEAKER_02
Um, and I m just glad to talk about it and glad to vent it out and like not let it fester.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, man.
6
SPEAKER_00
I mean, um,
6
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
6
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
6
SPEAKER_00
I mean this sounds like a Time time will heal the wound and then after I mean God you re gonna be you re like a gold mine You re gonna you re you re I don t do you understand this about yourself You know I don t cuz here s the thing we do Yeah, I don t think you do it because you just you went on a whole rant about how smart you are and then you aren t being aware of how much of a stud you are and
6
SPEAKER_00
You know what I m saying?
6
SPEAKER_00
You gotta redirect your self-awareness to the right spots.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m just in the process, since this is my first week of getting out of denial.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m just really getting ready for it all.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m prepping myself for what the future holds.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s gonna be sick.
6
SPEAKER_00
You re prepping yourself for what the future holds?
6
SPEAKER_00
Drink a lot of water.
6
SPEAKER_02
I already do.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m a healthy little boy.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know you are.
6
SPEAKER_00
I know you are.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s unintentional.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, I say I m healthy, but my diet is awful.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s just water and a ham sandwich every day.
6
SPEAKER_00
Let me know if you ever want to hear about an awful diet and I will tell you one.
6
SPEAKER_00
Edwin.
6
SPEAKER_00
Edwin, is there anything else I can do for you?
6
SPEAKER_00
I m not worried about you.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think you re going to be great.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s great to hear.
6
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
6
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
6
SPEAKER_02
I like listening to your podcast at work.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s very nice.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s very nice to just hear what everyone else is going through to get perspective on existence for everything.
6
SPEAKER_02
So I enjoy what you do and I appreciate it.
6
SPEAKER_00
Thanks, man.
6
SPEAKER_00
Enjoy being a hot, cool guitar guy.
6
SPEAKER_02
Say hi to Flesh s Yummy in the chat.
6
SPEAKER_00
I shall.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m reading all these.
6
SPEAKER_02
That is me.
6
SPEAKER_02
I am Flesh.
6
SPEAKER_00
Hey, take care, man.
6
SPEAKER_02
You too.
6
SPEAKER_02
See ya.
6
SPEAKER_00
This is a 6 3 man with a cool mustache who thinks that a bottle of water and a ham sandwich is a cheat meal.
6
SPEAKER_00
He s gonna be fine.
6
SPEAKER_01
Taking your phone calls every night Therapy kit goes to his right He s teaching you how to live your life But he s not really an expert