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Hey folks, it s Lyle.
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Before we get into the episode, I wanted to talk to you guys about a new thing I m doing where you can help support my lizard endeavors by becoming a premium member of this podcast over at therapygecko.supercast.com
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Premium Members, or GECK Legends, as I call them, will be able to get every new and existing episode of Therapy Gecko completely ad-free.
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You ll also get a bonus podcast episode once a month, a bonus live show episode once a month from all of the live shows I ve been doing around the world, a members-only live stream once a month, plus, you ll also support my ability to continue, hopefully, doing this podcast for a long time, doing it around the world,
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and also supporting my ability to occasionally go eat a slice of pizza.
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Go to therapygecko.supercast.com or find the link in the episode description to become a GECK legend today.
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Alright, let s get into the episode.
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SPEAKER_01
Uh, hi.
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Hi, what is your name?
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Um... My name is, uh, Vincendo.
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Vincendo?
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Vincenzo is that your real name?
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Yeah, what is what um what is that?
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I ve never heard that name It s like a play on the it s like a play on the name, you know This is your real name.
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You never heard Vincenzo?
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SPEAKER_00
No, what is it?
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My name.
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All right.
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I m gonna call you V. V, what is it you wanted to talk about today?
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Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
All right.
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Well, I have an actual, I feel like this is a lot easier now that I m like speaking to you.
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Okay.
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I have an actual thing that, uh, I wanted to talk to you about.
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So the job that I work at, I m not allowed to discuss.
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Things that go on with the patients normally, but I think I am I don t know am I I?
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Can see why they got a name now Yeah, yeah, right.
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That s kind of like the situation right okay?
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Oh, yeah, all you had to do was tell me now I m like thinking about if I m being offensive by asking you if Vintendo is a real name You kind of gas lit me into that, but that s okay I
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V, uh, well, uh, and you don t have to, again, you don t have to tell me anything you don t want to tell me, but, um... No, I need to, I need to, I need to tell you.
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Dude, wait, what s the job?
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Alright, so essentially I... exercise with old people.
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You what, adult people?
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I exercise with old people.
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Okay.
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Mm-hmm.
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And sometimes the sessions can last like an hour, an hour and a half.
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And at this one particular office I work at, it s kind of like one patient in at a time.
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So it s very much one-on-one time.
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Now I spent like three sessions with this one lady and I ve grown very fond of her.
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She s 92.
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She has dementia.
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and she s like an absolute like bad out of hell.
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Like she shows up to the office and goes home with like Ubers and cabs and she barely knows how to use her phone.
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It s nuts.
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So one of like the last times I was working with her last week, we got to talking and I m walking her out to her car.
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And I made a silly joke about Willy Wonka.
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And she basically says, oh, I know Willy Wonka.
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That s Johnny Depp.
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Do you know who Johnny Depp is?
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I was like, yeah, I do.
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So she goes, I have something to show you, but you can t tell anybody.
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So she goes ahead and she shows me.
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And it s like a conversation between her and Johnny Depp.
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And like,
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The face on the contact is like a headshot of Johnny Depp.
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And it s like the texts were like, good morning, beautiful.
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This is Johnny Depp.
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What are you doing this fine Monday morning?
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It was just like the most ridiculous text between her and Johnny Depp.
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And I was just like totally flabbergasted.
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She s like, look, he s going to
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he s going to send people, he s going to send like a car to take me to a jet, take me to Johnny Depp.
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Um, and I was like, Oh, this lady s literally going to get stolen fucking whatever this fake Johnny Depp.
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He s going to like actually give her to the Oompa Loompas like for real.
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And, uh, so I was trying to like be nice to her and say,
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You know, maybe it s not Johnny Depp after all.
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Maybe it s just some somebody that you don t know on the internet.
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And she was like, no, no, no, no, no.
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This is Johnny Depp.
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I m positive of it.
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She goes, there is one thing I m concerned about, though.
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I hear that he s beaten his woman before, and I just don t want him to do that to me.
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I was like, what the fuck?
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So it turned out she has some kids.
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I told the people that I work with.
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And everybody was kind of like, it s not our position to do anything about that.
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So I want to ask you, what do I do?
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Okay.
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First of all, that s a wild story.
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It s a true story.
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It s been weighing on me.
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It s been like,
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It s been like 15 days now, maybe.
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And I literally think about it.
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And she hasn t shown up last week or the week before.
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Oh, Jesus.
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And I ve been calling you since like the day- Don t put it on me, dude.
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I didn t want to put it on you.
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Don t put it on me.
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I m fucking with you.
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Oh my God, that s so wild.
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Wow.
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Okay.
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Here s the funny thing for a second when you said that when she was talking about she knows Johnny Depp Like I thought I m like, oh shit.
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You met a woman who knows Johnny Depp That s what I thought for a second, too Okay, and then the contact picture on top of it was just so ridiculous.
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It was so funny Yeah, this little lady she got abducted I don t know what to do so do you
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Okay.
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So you think you said this, you were like, you said that this violates HIPAA in some way, right?
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I mean, I think so.
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Well, I, no, I don t think so because you just like, can t use like specific like things.
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You re allowed to, I think you should tell somebody because you... I brought this up to like three, four people.
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Who d you bring it up to?
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Like receptionist, higher ups.
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And I was like, do I take it upon myself to like go into her, like, I don t know.
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Find people who are like owning this or attached to this lady What did your higher-ups say when you told them about this they were kind of like, oh that s crazy Well, hopefully that doesn t happen
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They probably deal with so much like crazy like old person dementia stuff that they re like we can t we can t save everyone or they probably have a mentality like that where they re just like like I m sure they ve all like have been in some situation like this before where they re all like
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Yeah, that just sounds like a crazy old person thing like Yeah, whatever.
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You know like it s not a big deal to them It s so wild so the tip so the texts were saying Tell me tell me exactly what did these texts say was they did they say like we re going to pick you up in a car and shit like that
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So she was like really trying to show off after a certain point.
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She s like scrolling through the whole thing.
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And so when it stopped, she like reversed it.
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So like she went all the way up to the beginning of the, like the messages.
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And genuinely, it didn t seem like they were talking for long.
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Seems like maybe they had like two days, three days worth of conversation in there.
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And like some of like the earlier stuff was just like, good morning, beautiful.
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Like, what are you up to right now, beautiful?
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It was just like really repetitive, like cringy shit with like punctuation.
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So like periods and question marks and stuff.
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And then like, she would send back like daisy emojis and whatnot.
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And then as she s going back to like the more recent stuff, you can tell that there s like longer texts on Johnny Depp s part.
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because I think he was really trying to seal the deal here.
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And there was something about an offer to be flown somewhere.
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But I didn t see a lot of the context.
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I did see, though, that one of the more recent things was talking about a flight on his end.
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Here s another thing well, okay, the fact that you said she stopped showing up is concerning, but I was thinking This woman is 92 years old and has dimension I don t like can she get in a
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for how does she can she go places without people can she like physically mentally like even get to the airport and go on a flight and follow because she s like all the instructions that you need to do that like the the the action of going to the airport going through airport security booking a flight doing all that shit
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It s kind of like, can she do all of that without needing help from somebody who says, hey, why are you going to Taiwan?
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And when she says Johnny Depp, like, can she even get that far?
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God, I don t know.
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I don t know.
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But just like the fact that, I mean, what do you even do with like a 92 year old?
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That s another thing I was thinking about.
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I m sure that there s a market for weird shit, but.
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And like the thing is, is like the two kids, like from what I ve gathered, supposedly just kind of like we re around and then we re less around and then weren t around at all.
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So even if they were like, give us a hundred grand or your mom gets it, they might be like,
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kids grandma s not showing up at thanksgiving yeah yeah it s just like the most fucked up thing and i can t stop thinking about it so you told the higher up the receptionist just told a bunch of people and nobody said well you were it was more and more like it was like it was rich it was received in like more of like a kind of like a silly funny thing like did you hear about this
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The problem is that it is like pretty funny.
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It is kind of hysterical.
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It s pretty funny.
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But I m comforted by the idea that I don t think this woman can get into an airplane by herself.
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I don t think she can do all those things that you need to do to be able to get into an airplane.
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That s- I feel like an airplane that like somebody else is paying for.
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Because then do they have to like get- like if she s getting flown out, then she has to like get- find a way to sign into a thing to get money from somebody and then book a whatever- it s just too much stuff for a 92 year old woman with dementia to figure out.
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Without somebody stepping in.
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God, I don t know.
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I mean, if they re driving to her house, can they just end right there?
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It was their plan.
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It was their plan for her to drive for somebody drive to her house.
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I can t I cannot say like I saw like anything definitive.
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But I did see like, do you think about calling the police?
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Oh, God.
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Or like, like a human trafficking line or something like that?
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Jesus Christ.
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I mean,
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to see if they know about any other Johnny Depp guys.
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Johnny Depp.
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Yikes.
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I mean, it s just like such a... It s such a name.
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Like, I don t think that there s gonna be like a repeat Johnny Steeler.
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I m gonna... I m gonna do this.
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Let s open the... We re gonna open the chat for questions.
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Okay.
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I m as out of loss about this as you are.
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But then that s the thing, right?
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Like, I guess it kind of supersedes.
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But then it was like also her personal trust.
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Like one of the first things she said to me was like, now you can t, now you can t tell anybody about this.
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And so like, I thought about it for like four minutes and I was like, nah, this is fucked up.
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I gotta tell someone.
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All right, I gotta say this.
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There s a, there s a user in the chat.
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Yeah.
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And their username is creepy underscore guy.
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And he said, is she hot?
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And you don t have to answer that.
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Oh, okay.
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Multiple people are saying that, but that we don t, we don t need that.
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All right.
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A lot of people are saying this, a lot of, okay.
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A lot of people are saying this and this is, and this is, and this is what I think.
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And by the way, by the way, I agree with this.
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I agree with what a lot of people are saying in the chat.
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She looked like the old Rose from the Titanic.
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What s the old Rose?
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Like the older version of Rose.
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Okay.
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She looks like the old, old version of Rose.
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People are saying that it s a money scam.
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There s no imminent physical danger.
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You asked, what would they want with a 92 year old woman?
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And the answer is most likely money.
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Which don t get me wrong, sucks, but I don t think she s gonna, I don t think, I don t think she s going to get on a plane.
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She might get her bank account wiped, but I mean, what does she need money for?
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She s 92 years old.
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God damn.
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I Think I ll feel a lot better wait wait I have an idea tell me You ve some you go comb through You re gonna have to break a few rules for this.
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Here s what you do you comb through the records of The hospital no you comb through the records and
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of the fitness place.
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You find her phone number.
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You text her.
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And you say, what s her name?
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What s her name?
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Rose.
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You say, hey Rose, I know you don t recognize this number, but this is Amber Heard.
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Whatever you do, under no circumstances should you get on a plane to visit my ex-husband Johnny Depp.
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And that ll convince her.
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Okay.
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That does break a few rules.
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That s what you gotta do.
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I love you.
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I love you too, man.
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Is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
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Yes, you all scare me.
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Have a good night.
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Later, brother.
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SPEAKER_01
Hello?
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Am I actually on air?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Who is this?
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SPEAKER_00
This is Artemis Artemis.
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How old are you Artemis?
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I m 24.
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I can t believe we got on the street.
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Oh my God.
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How s life Artemis?
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Life has been not too bad.
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Can t complain too much.
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That s not true.
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Complain.
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Give me some everyone.
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Everyone who says that is lying.
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There s always something to complain about.
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That s my motto in life.
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I m very unhappy.
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Give me something.
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Give me something to complain about.
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I can complain about my ex-boyfriend like most people do.
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OK.
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SPEAKER_00
Actually, you know what?
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I want to ask you this before we do any of that, because I was mainly just trying to be funny.
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SPEAKER_00
Is there anything in particular you wanted to call in to talk about?
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SPEAKER_01
Uh, kind of the situation I m in right now with him.
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I just needed.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
All right.
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The ex-boyfriend is the, okay.
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SPEAKER_00
All right.
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SPEAKER_00
Um, what s up?
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So to give you some background, we met in our twenties cause we worked the same job.
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And after I d say about a few months, we started talking and then we started dating.
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Okay, so fast forward about six months to a year, we move in together.
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Things are going great, things are going nice.
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And then he happens to go through my phone and sees these old text messages that were saying like,
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Cause I was having second thoughts about being with him for a second, but I talked it out and I told my friend, I was like, you know what I m going to say, but for some reason that just really made him mad.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_01
So these were old texts that he found between you and your friend where you were talking about how you weren t sure if you wanted to continue being with him.
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SPEAKER_00
Yes.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
Um, and why was he looking through your phone?
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SPEAKER_00
I have no idea.
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SPEAKER_00
I didn t know he was doing it cause I was driving.
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SPEAKER_00
Looking at him all right Mmm.
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SPEAKER_01
Was there anything in that I mean first of all I don t think you should I don t think you should have been looking through your phone I Don t know how you feel about that or if that upset you at all It did because I mean I don t have anything to hide, but why are you like I?
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SPEAKER_00
Going through my individual messages looking for things.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I don t think I think that s the I don t I don t I don t think that s very good, but um Was there I mean I guess aside from that was there anything in particular that Any quotes in particular that that he saw that he was upset by?
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SPEAKER_00
Um honestly all I really said was I kind of want to or I asked should I
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SPEAKER_00
break up with him to pursue something with someone else.
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And they were like, Do you really like him?
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SPEAKER_00
And I was like, Yes, I do like him a lot.
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SPEAKER_00
And so they said, Well, don t ruin it.
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SPEAKER_00
Just stay with him.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
So I don t know how that made him upset.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay, but this is your ex boyfriend.
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SPEAKER_01
So how recently did this happen?
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SPEAKER_00
That was when we were first together.
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SPEAKER_01
Alright, so this has been a little on and off situation going on.
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SPEAKER_01
Alright.
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SPEAKER_01
And for how long has this recent off been off?
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SPEAKER_00
Um, we last broke up for the final time, like, end of May.
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SPEAKER_01
Alright, so it s been a while.
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SPEAKER_01
It s been like three months?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
I know.
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SPEAKER_01
Are you guys in contact at all?
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SPEAKER_00
No, no, you haven t talked to him since May.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_01
So what s the what are the contemplations in your head?
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Is it like I m debating if I m going to text this person?
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SPEAKER_01
I m what what what specifically.
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SPEAKER_01
In this is giving you problems, is it the moving on, is it the should I move on?
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SPEAKER_00
It s more like I. I have moved on, I have no feelings for him.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
But we are going to be attached to each other for at least 18 years.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, man.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Have the 18 years begun?
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SPEAKER_00
They begin in December.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, man.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s the bad part.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, was it an accident?
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SPEAKER_00
It was not planned, but it was not.
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SPEAKER_00
What s the word?
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SPEAKER_00
Unexpected.
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SPEAKER_01
Does that mean we were having a bunch of raw sex and we re like, fuck it, if anything happens, it happens and then it happened.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
OK.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_01
And how long?
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SPEAKER_01
December.
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SPEAKER_01
So you ve been pregnant for how long?
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SPEAKER_00
I will actually be six months on Wednesday.
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SPEAKER_01
Wow.
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SPEAKER_01
OK.
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SPEAKER_01
And like, look, by the way, you can talk to me about as much or as little of this as you want to.
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SPEAKER_01
But at the beginning of this, were you were you like off the bat?
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SPEAKER_01
Like, I m going to I m going to go through with this.
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SPEAKER_01
I m going to keep it.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Cause I ve always thought that like, if I do ever end up with a kid, I m going to keep it.
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SPEAKER_00
Cause the thought of giving it away would break my heart.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
And, uh, what about him?
2
SPEAKER_01
What s, what s the conversation with him look like?
2
SPEAKER_01
Is he want to be in the, in the life of the, of the kid or is he, is he what s his deal?
2
SPEAKER_00
His deal is that he hates me.
2
SPEAKER_00
Apparently I m the devil and you know, we just don t talk.
2
SPEAKER_00
He told me not to talk to him.
2
SPEAKER_00
So,
2
SPEAKER_00
I was like, okay, won t hear a peep, won t hear a word brother.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
So he doesn t want to be in the kid s life at all.
2
SPEAKER_00
He has actually threatened for full custody because I m quote unquote mentally insane.
2
SPEAKER_01
So he has threatened you for full custody.
2
SPEAKER_01
Has he like reached out to you via a lawyer in the past three months?
2
SPEAKER_00
No.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
Do you predict that he will?
2
SPEAKER_01
Has he had, has he shown any interest of like, like, is he going to pop up in December and just be like, Hey, what s up?
2
SPEAKER_01
Like what s, what s his, what s his deal?
2
SPEAKER_00
Thankfully he lives two states away.
2
SPEAKER_00
So him popping up is very unlikely.
2
SPEAKER_01
Has he,
2
SPEAKER_01
Like, and he hasn t reached out to you at all to be like, Hey, here s the, what s the plan with the baby?
2
SPEAKER_01
Like showing any sign that he s going to do anything to try to be in the, in the, in the life of the baby.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, because myself and others I ve talked to have all said that if he does try to go for custody, it will be just to make me upset because
2
SPEAKER_00
Outside of that, I don t see why.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, look, I don t know how any of that shit works.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m not a lawyer.
2
SPEAKER_01
But... Alright, so, I mean, look, aside from your relationship with him, how are you feeling about having this kid?
2
SPEAKER_01
Do you feel... Are you excited about it?
2
SPEAKER_01
Are you scared about it?
2
SPEAKER_01
What s your feeling about that?
2
SPEAKER_00
Definitely nervous-sided.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve always wanted to be a mom.
2
SPEAKER_00
I have no dream job.
2
SPEAKER_00
like raising a tiny person to see what kind of person they become.
2
SPEAKER_01
You ve always wanted to be a mom, so this has been a thing you ve wanted for a bit.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but with him specifically, no, but it s happened.
2
SPEAKER_01
Alright, so I guess that explains the whole, like, we re gonna do it, Rob, and whatever happens happens, because you were like, alright, if it happens, it would be something I wanted anyway.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, it was that and
2
SPEAKER_00
Before, like, all that happened, we hadn t talked for a while and then he randomly started talking to me again.
2
SPEAKER_00
And he was like, yo, you know, come move down here.
2
SPEAKER_00
Come be here with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
I can take care of you.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I believed him.
2
SPEAKER_00
He was like, I ve changed.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve, I ve turned a new leaf.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I thought, you know, why not give him a chance?
2
SPEAKER_00
And that leaf was still the same at the end of the day.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, um,
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, man.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I see you re gonna have a kid.
2
SPEAKER_00
Mm hmm.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s very eye opening.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s cool.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s good that you that s good that you wanted it.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know, because
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, it sounds like it s not, it didn t just spring up on you like, oh, I m sure this kid, this kid is going to ruin my, um, I m trying to become a social media influencer doing, uh, uh, uh, Roy Rogers mukbangs.
2
SPEAKER_01
And here s this child coming along to ruin my subscriber growth.
2
SPEAKER_01
This is what you wanted to do.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, this is what I wanted.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I wish we could have stayed together.
2
SPEAKER_01
By the way, I just want so I want just as a side note, if anyone does want to do the Roy Rogers mukbang channel, you can do that idea.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m not going to do it.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s a free open source idea for anyone listening to this to take and roll with.
2
SPEAKER_01
All right, so.
2
SPEAKER_01
Are you are you you don t you seem prepared, you seem prepared.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m not worried about you.
2
SPEAKER_01
You seem.
3
SPEAKER_00
prepared yeah I ve kind of thought this through for a long time okay so it s just the I get all right so in this whole situation in this whole situation tell me there s a lot of moving parts and you send and look in the moving parts that I would
3
SPEAKER_00
if I was in your situation be the most worried about?
3
SPEAKER_00
You seem pretty level-headed and calm.
3
SPEAKER_00
And maybe the answer to this question is nothing, but what parts of the situation are bothering you?
3
SPEAKER_02
Not knowing if he will actually try for custody or not, and just the way things ended in general with him.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, do you have a job?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
What do you do?
3
SPEAKER_02
I m a barista.
3
SPEAKER_00
Cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, I was going to say you should talk to a lawyer about this.
3
SPEAKER_00
You should talk, you should, you should talk to a lawyer.
3
SPEAKER_00
They re, they re going to be the ones that, uh, have you thought, have you done anything like that?
3
SPEAKER_00
Have you, have you Googled it?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I ve Googled it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay, what did Google say?
3
SPEAKER_00
I m the worst advice gecko in the world, telling people to Google stuff.
3
SPEAKER_02
I actually went to Reddit and someone on Reddit told me that I need to look up my state laws, so I did.
3
SPEAKER_02
And it says because we are unwed, I have full custody.
3
SPEAKER_02
No shit.
3
SPEAKER_02
And they also told me a few other suggestions
3
SPEAKER_02
No shit.
3
SPEAKER_02
So that way he has to go through some steps in order to actually try to fight for safe custody.
3
SPEAKER_00
Can I ask you what state you re in?
3
SPEAKER_02
Indiana.
3
SPEAKER_00
Indiana.
3
SPEAKER_00
Alright, so in Indiana, if you re not married, you just have full custody of the kid.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Man.
3
SPEAKER_00
Alright, that s pretty cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I don t know, dude, if I were like, I don t know how the law works, but if I were a judge and it was like, and it was like you hung, you were chilling with this guy, this baby for nine months and he didn t make any, anything of any stuff, any, any, anything of any, and you re just chilling with the baby.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then when the baby pops out, how s he going to just show up, you know?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
Cause I m not going out of my way to contact him because like I said, he told me to stop talking to him.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I don t know what he wants me to do when the kid is born.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like it s at that point, it s somewhat my responsibility to alert him that the baby s born.
3
SPEAKER_02
If you tell me not to talk to you,
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know, man.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, he knows, he knows you re, he knows you re pregnant.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, if he, dude, I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, you obviously you re obligated to tell him that you re pregnant, but like sending him a reminder email when the baby is born, it s like, he fucking knows, you know?
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if you need to send him pictures.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, dude, you got to talk to a lawyer about this, but I don t know if the, if all right, I m not even, I m not even joking.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think if Reddit says you re good, like I wouldn t take that as gospel that you re good, but you re, that means you re elite.
3
SPEAKER_00
You re that means you re like probably good.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I m, I m really hoping so.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like I m going to definitely.
3
SPEAKER_02
If I need a lawyer, if he decides to try anything, which I really don t think he will, but there s always an off chance he might.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s not a therapy gecko fan, is he?
3
SPEAKER_02
No, I highly doubt that.
3
SPEAKER_00
All right, cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
It ll be an interesting podcast for somebody to find out they have a son.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t know what the baby will be yet.
3
SPEAKER_00
What does that mean?
3
SPEAKER_00
You don t know what the baby will be?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I m trying to keep it a surprise for myself and wait till like we have a little baby party.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, like if it s a boy or a girl?
3
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s cool.
3
SPEAKER_00
Which one do you hope it is?
3
SPEAKER_02
I m hoping for my own sanity, a girl, because
3
SPEAKER_02
I just wouldn t know how to raise her better than a boy.
3
SPEAKER_02
Cause I don t know when they get to a certain point, how to like guide him through life with his man troubles.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Um, that s, that s my only advice to, um,
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah, I don t think my mom ever walked in on me jerking off.
3
SPEAKER_00
Actually, she might have once, but it was, I was like, I was just kind of, I had already like kind of ended and I was just kind of sitting there.
3
SPEAKER_00
So it wasn t as bad.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was like, if it had happened while I was doing it.
3
SPEAKER_00
So, and I say that story to say that
3
SPEAKER_00
Boy or a girl, you ll be fine.
3
SPEAKER_00
You seem like you have a level head.
3
SPEAKER_00
You seem like a smart person.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m glad that you re fulfilling a dream of yours.
3
SPEAKER_00
And it also sounds like you got a good family around you too.
3
SPEAKER_00
I think you ll be good.
3
SPEAKER_00
Do you think you ll be good?
3
SPEAKER_02
I think so, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
I feel like I m like,
3
SPEAKER_00
Mentally and emotionally prepared for this That is more than most folks could say I hope you understand that What is your what is your name again Artemis
3
SPEAKER_00
Artemis, Artemis, is there any, well, I guess, is there anything else I can do for you or that you wanted to say or talk about or anything or just anything at all before we go?
3
SPEAKER_02
I guess I could say that if someone promises you
3
SPEAKER_02
that they will take care of you, and love you, and do all sorts of things for you.
3
SPEAKER_02
Make sure their actions back it up.
3
SPEAKER_02
I know people hear this all the time, actions speak louder than words, but it s extremely true.
3
SPEAKER_02
And don t trust people that use therapy words out of context, or wrongly, I mean.
3
SPEAKER_00
Artemis, good luck to you, and have a good rest of the night.
3
SPEAKER_00
Thank you That s what I love about Amazon Prime they promise two-day shipping they deliver it They didn t even pay me to say that That s just what I thought about from that context Hello hi Hi, what s your name?
3
SPEAKER_01
Eclipse
3
SPEAKER_00
What s up?
3
SPEAKER_00
How s it going?
3
SPEAKER_01
Is this Lyle?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it is.
3
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
I had a feeling you d get in.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m like cleaning a house right now.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I don t know if I should be on the phone, but, but I got you on my shoulder.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I think it should be good.
3
SPEAKER_00
Or is your cleaning a house like for somebody else?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes, but they re not home right now.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
What is that your, is that your job?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like a little side hustle thing.
3
SPEAKER_01
to try to make more money because I don t like working a real job.
3
SPEAKER_01
So like I spend a lot of energy trying not to work a real job by working, doing lots of random things.
3
SPEAKER_00
I like the I like that approach a lot.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s that s that s a good approach, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Because you don t want to have to get like a nine to five like, you know, you re committed for the rest of your life to this amount of hours being in this place at this what you re you know, taking, taking gigs.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s, that s
4
SPEAKER_01
I like that way of the way of doing things.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I actually just got a real job, but only worked out like two days a week.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s the first time in my life.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m like 26.
4
SPEAKER_00
I finally got a job at a cafe.
4
SPEAKER_01
Cool.
4
SPEAKER_01
Cool.
4
SPEAKER_01
What, uh, what, what, what kinds of odd jobs do you do?
4
SPEAKER_01
Just like cleaning and Uber drive or anything like that?
4
SPEAKER_00
Um, I, yeah, cleaning, I do some like random art commission stuff.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay, I am the person who gave you the, like, being John Malkovich text picture.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh!
4
SPEAKER_01
I know exactly who you are.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah!
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah!
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thanks, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
That was, that was one of my favorite, uh, that was one of my favorite ones, man.
4
SPEAKER_01
Vancouver.
4
SPEAKER_01
That was cool.
4
SPEAKER_01
I felt like, that was one of those where I got off the stage, I was like, oh, that actually, that went pretty well.
4
SPEAKER_01
That was fun.
4
SPEAKER_01
Um...
4
SPEAKER_01
Hell yeah, well, uh... Dude, is there anything in particular that you wanted to talk about?
4
SPEAKER_01
It s okay, if not, we can keep, uh... We can keep talking about how good my Vancouver show was.
4
SPEAKER_00
I have some topics, but... Yeah, the Vancouver, that Vancouver show was amazing.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was just joking.
4
SPEAKER_00
I went in really randomly.
4
SPEAKER_01
What, uh, yeah, give me, you can, whatever, whatever you want, ma am.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t know, I think, I m just confused in life in general, like a lot of people are that call into this show.
4
SPEAKER_00
Especially with like, with you for example, like you just choose something and then all of a sudden the ball can get rolling and then you re like in it super deep.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I guess I m like afraid to fully commit to something.
4
SPEAKER_00
You don t know where it s gonna go.
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, are you talking about with me, like I chose this gecko thing and now it s, the ball is rolling?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like you were just doing random stuff on Reddit and then it just like took off and now this is like your thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
And everyone s like, don t ever stop Lyle.
4
SPEAKER_01
well, so well You know this is actually is interesting that you bring this up because I ve been thinking about this a lot is I didn t really chew I didn t really there was no thing in my mind of like I m going to become Therapy Gecko, and I m going to dedicate my life to it wasn t like that a lot.
4
SPEAKER_01
I was like you said trying different things and then this started working and
4
SPEAKER_01
The reason I do this right now is because not the reason I just I like that that Okay, so the first like video I posted of this like instantly got like 2 million views and I think I
4
SPEAKER_01
The first, one of the first live streams I ever did to this went to the front page of Reddit.
4
SPEAKER_01
And if that, if it didn t, if something didn t happen immediately that made me go, oh, okay, this isn t the most stupid idea in the world, I wouldn t have done it.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t think Therapy Gekko was one of those ideas I would have tried.
4
SPEAKER_01
I would have just gone at.
4
SPEAKER_01
for years and been like one day it s gonna catch on you know I would have done I would have done I I I m I like doing stuff I like tinkering around and and and trying to do different things so I would have done something but
4
SPEAKER_01
It wasn t like a choice.
4
SPEAKER_01
Kind of like what you re, I mean... Kind of like what you re talking about.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s just doing random things.
4
SPEAKER_01
And now... The gecko has become an umbrella upon which I can now fuck around and do... Different, different things.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s just I m, um, I do them as a gecko.
4
SPEAKER_01
Now.
4
SPEAKER_01
So what are you... Trying to... What are you afraid of choosing?
4
SPEAKER_00
Um... Well...
4
SPEAKER_00
I guess, gosh, I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_00
It just seems like people get sucked into doing jobs, so I end up doing these littler things, so they have no responsibilities attached or timelines.
4
SPEAKER_01
What would you do?
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, you re an artist.
4
SPEAKER_01
You gave me that cool John Malkovich gecko piece.
4
SPEAKER_01
Is that something you want to do as a career of some kind?
4
SPEAKER_00
What s funny with doing, I don t know if you have done any like music or art stuff before.
4
SPEAKER_00
As soon as you start to put too much importance on it, it kind of sucks the fun out of it.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I ve been trying to figure out like if I just need to figure out like exactly what would be super fun for me for art or if there s like a really important purpose attached to it.
4
SPEAKER_00
to then still maybe give me some sort of drive.
4
SPEAKER_00
I have very little drive to work or do stuff at all, pretty much.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
I feel that.
4
SPEAKER_01
I feel that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, you work just enough that you can like... How much time does it take for you to like pay rent and eat food?
4
SPEAKER_00
Not too much.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m pretty lucky.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m in like a really janky, weird house.
4
SPEAKER_00
where everything is broken, but it s really cool.
4
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
I like the, by the way, I like that idea.
4
SPEAKER_01
I like that idea.
4
SPEAKER_01
I like the idea of getting your expenses to however little they can be without, you know, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then just working like a little bit of like some random job, like cleaning someone s house or doing Uber or something like that, just to like cover all that stuff.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then you have just like, and now you just have a bunch of free time.
4
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s a great, it s a great, it s a great strategy.
4
SPEAKER_00
I feel like I have a lot of freedom.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s fantastic.
4
SPEAKER_00
I have a lot of time, but I also don t have a lot of money, so I also don t have a lot of freedom.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s a weird paradox.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
What do you want to do?
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, let s get into that.
4
SPEAKER_01
What do you want to do with your freedom that you cannot afford to do?
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, travel for one.
4
SPEAKER_00
Although I do really appreciate the place that I m at.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, British Columbia is so big that
4
SPEAKER_00
I can spend a lot of time traveling.
4
SPEAKER_01
What s your dream destination?
4
SPEAKER_01
If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_00
Maybe first place I want to go to is Cuba or Southeast Asia.
4
SPEAKER_01
Southeast Asia.
4
SPEAKER_01
All right.
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, how much does it cost?
4
SPEAKER_01
How much is a flight from Vancouver to Thailand?
4
SPEAKER_00
I truly have like around $0 all the time, but it s weird.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s like a weird masochistic thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s like kind of fun trying to navigate life, like having very little money.
4
SPEAKER_01
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I understand what you mean.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s a challenge.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, I really want a poutine, but I couldn t afford poutine.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I went to the community fridge and there happened to be a half open bag of frozen fries.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I bought some gravy and A&W.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I put some of my own cheese on there and I made my own poutine.
4
SPEAKER_00
I felt just like,
4
SPEAKER_01
I feel really good about that You should you should because and the reason you should feel good about that is because you re you don t need like You know There s there s guys out there who have like a milli they have like two whatever ten million dollars If they had zero dollars, they d be fucked But there s nothing real you can t get like so fucked
4
SPEAKER_01
that you can t figure something out.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s a strong sense of independence in there to be proud of.
4
SPEAKER_01
Is that what you feel, a sense of independence?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there s some independence.
4
SPEAKER_00
There s also, I know that if I had 100 times more money, then I m not gonna be 100 times happier.
4
SPEAKER_00
It gives me very little incentive to.
4
SPEAKER_00
try to gain more you know by working yeah yeah spending your days doing stuff you don t like doing
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, I mean, dude, shit, if you can get over to Thailand, I don t know how long you re planning to stay there for, but I ve talked about this on here a lot, and I think about it just in my personal life, like you can just find some remote gig or find some like work away gig in Thailand, and then you gotta find a way to save up the flight to get there, which will probably cost, you know,
4
SPEAKER_01
Whatever $700 a lot more doable, and I think I just got to get over the hump of Just well, that s the that s the thing is is have you have you like priced it out at all?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I really I really like like I ve been really enjoying just establishing myself in Vancouver also like You know getting friends and like okay to be a part of Communities and stuff cool
4
SPEAKER_00
Good.
4
SPEAKER_00
So at the same time, it s like I don t want to leave yet, but it s definitely like I have it in the back of my mind.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s like something I ve got to do.
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, what else what else is bothering you?
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I don t know what is bothering me.
5
SPEAKER_02
I guess I ve just been continually bothered by not being in the present moment all the time.
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You sound pretty in the present moment.
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You were talking about how you want to establish yourself in Vancouver and you re going to things and hanging out with people and you re enjoying that.
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That sounds pretty present.
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I m on the path of it, but you know how there s a feeling of just being kind of unsettled because you re thinking about
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the future past too much when like I don t know like even just like right now like there s like beautiful views right now and I m trying to be grateful just to be able to see out this window yeah that I m cleaning it s pretty great yeah yeah but yeah all the time I get sucked into worrying about stuff and I guess that bothers me dude I met this guy I was there was a dude who was like
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There s a guy who I work at the air at the counter at the airport And I was checking my bag in with him, and I was like how you doing?
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And he looked at me, and it was like 7 o clock in the morning like this guy woke up at 4 a.m.
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and He looked at me and very genuinely said I m doing fantastic How are you doing?
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And I was like do you actually and they just in a way where I was like oh this guy This is not like a customer service in this guy
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I could just feel that he meant it when he said it.
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And so I asked, I was like, do you really do you really mean that?
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You look like you mean that.
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And he didn t flinch.
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He was like, yes, absolutely.
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There s something to be grateful for every day.
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I m just grateful to be here.
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I was like, damn, this guy and this guy is and this guy is like in this guy woke up at four o clock in the morning to go get screamed at by hundreds of people every day at the airport.
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He he s he s doing great.
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You know and I was like fuck man.
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This guy s something What this guy s got something?
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What is it?
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What is you know?
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How do I access that?
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Some people I think are born with more of that than others You know mm-hmm.
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No, I ve been working on it pretty hard like the pandemic I started looking cute during the like the very beginning back when I was living with my parents and
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Yeah, just like the main thing I was working on.
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I was just trying to be happy or at least content or whatever.
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Like not fiending so much.
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Yeah.
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Good things.
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Yeah.
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I did an exercise.
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I was journaled today.
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Just trying to, you know, think about like, uh, uh, sort of reassess my perspective on my own life instead of getting upset about it.
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It s a helpful thing to do.
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Indeed.
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Yeah, I find journaling is really hard to keep up with.
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Or just like any habit, it s very difficult.
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Vancouver s got nice trees.
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Ooh, it is very nice here.
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That s what you say when you run out of conversation topics.
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But no, I shouldn t have even said that, because it actually ended up being a conversation topic.
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I can tell you about where I came from before Vancouver, because just on a trip that I m living here, I can t believe that I
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I stayed in the city for so long.
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Uh, sure.
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Yeah.
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So I came from a town of like 400 people and there is no cell service and we didn t have wifi or a toilet or, or there was no police there.
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Like it was just truly in the middle of nowhere and just kind of self-governing and insane.
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Kind of like trailer park boys, but hippie.
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Hmm.
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Hmm.
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And now you re in the big city of Vancouver.
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Now I m in the big city and it s weird because some of my friends are living in this kind of like commune situation.
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And they just don t pay any money.
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And they re having a great time.
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And I just I m always wondering like, what the heck am I doing out here?
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What the heck are you doing out here?
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You just your friends are in a commune.
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That sounds like you re that sounds like you re kind of thing.
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That sounds that sounds up.
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SPEAKER_01
I ve only known you for 15 minutes, but that sounds extremely up your alley.
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Oh, it sounds amazing, but you know, I have to get out of there.
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Like I grew up there my entire life.
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Oh, okay.
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Yeah.
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And then it s in the art scene.
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So I m trying to figure out if I should go out there and just like start something.
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Why don t you, Hey, Hey, why don t you start a commune?
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Someone s got to start it.
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I ll just start the Vancouver commune.
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That would be amazing.
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I thought about making a weird underground society.
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I don t know how you- I don t know how you start a commune, because you have to... find a place to live that s free.
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Oh, you know what you can do?
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Why don t you- oh, I guess... I guess- I guess if you get, like... If you get... like... 400,000 people to give you one dollar...
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You can buy a plot of land and all of them can take turns living on it.
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Like a, like a, like a timeshare commune.
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That s like, what s the math on that?
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Like you d only be able to live there like once every few years?
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SPEAKER_01
Screw math.
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Math is, uh, we, we do, we don t, we don t abandon our families to join communes to do math.
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SPEAKER_01
Um, Eclipse, you said your name was?
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Yeah.
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Eclipse, is there anything else you want to say to the people at the computer before we go?
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Thanks you guys all for listening and being a part of the G.E.C.K.
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team.
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And I hope you guys all enjoy your lives.
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You as well.
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Good luck with eating food and living in a place.
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Thank you so much.
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Have a good night.
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You too.
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SPEAKER_01
Hey folks, I m about to play a clip from this month s bonus episode.
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Bonus episodes are available to premium subscribers of Therapy Gecko, who also get access to all episodes ad-free, recordings from my live shows, and a whole lot of other fun stuff.
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You can sign up to become a premium member at therapygecko.supercast.com, or find the link in the episode description.
5
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So here is the clip.
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I m having to go hide in my garage and talk to you.
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Tell me this thing that you had to hide all the way in your garage to tell me.
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SPEAKER_03
Well, my dad is an ex-interrogator who basically played the ultimate game of hide and seek with the most wanted person on earth.
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He s my stepdad.
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But my biological dad isn t around.
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And that s because part of the reason is when I was young,
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My stepdad came into my life and kicked my biological dad s ass and then he got put in jail from it and used his connections to get out of jail.
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And yeah, it s a whole lot of things, but essentially my stepdad was
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the interrogator who looked for Osama bin Laden.
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Taking your phone calls every night Therapy kit goes to his right He s teaching you how to live your life But he s not really an expert