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This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.
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Look at how fast, we re almost halfway through the year.
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Crazy, yeah.
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Are you proud of what you ve done in 2024 so far?
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I mean, you always want to do more, right?
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Life goes so fast, David.
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It s important to take a moment to celebrate your wins, make adjustments for the rest of the year.
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Therapy can help you take stock of your progress and set achievable goals for the next six months.
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Listen, therapy is the way to go.
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I did it for a while.
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And I think the thing that slowed me down was what they, is driving to Santa Monica in traffic once or twice a week.
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This is online.
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It s a great idea.
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Very convenient.
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It helps you.
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You ve got coping skills, how to set boundaries.
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I mean, there s so many things you can do here to be a better version of yourself.
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You can probably always sharpen it.
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Yeah, I mean, I had a therapist in Portland and I would commute and that was a pain.
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That s a long drive.
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I know it was 1300 miles one way, but you know, it s good therapist.
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But yeah, this one you can mix and match and your thoughts kind of control you and you want to master them.
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And when you talk to someone else, they re able to kind of discern it out.
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So if you re thinking of starting to give therapy a try, give BetterHelp a try.
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Yeah, it s entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, suited to your schedule.
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You fill out a questionnaire, get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapist if you want to for any reason, no charge.
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Take a moment, visit betterhelp.com slash FOTW today.
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Get 10% off your first month.
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That s betterhelp, H-E-L-P.com slash F-O-T-W.
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Here we go, David.
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I d like to sing a little song about our next guest.
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See if you can guess who it is.
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Okay.
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Will Fulton.
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I have one guess so far.
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I m not going to say it.
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Will Fulton.
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Hey, hey, hey.
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Same guess.
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Will Forte, anybody?
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Will Forte.
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I put my shades on so I could hear better.
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It s a good song.
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It s a toe-tapper.
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Will Forte, who was in Last Man Standing.
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Well, he was one of our classic Saturday Night Live cast members.
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He does the most eccentric sketches.
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One involving Jason Sudeikis and potato chips is kind of famous.
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Yeah.
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So it was so fun to talk to him.
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His comedy is so eccentric and brilliant, and yet he s such a humble, sweet guy to talk to.
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Yeah, he was very sweet.
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And we went through a lot of the sketches and, you know, Dana, you re very complimentary because he s got so many zigzag type of bits where you don t see where they re going.
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Oh, yeah.
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He s very out there.
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The Spelling Bee does one, Spelling Bee, if you ve ever seen it, we talk about that one.
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It s so, so funny.
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He is Mr. Commitment.
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Yeah.
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Commits, perfect for SNL, just on that.
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Go ahead.
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Mr. Commitment.
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Mr. Commitment.
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Commitment.
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Yeah, can I play and you just sing?
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Mr. Commitment.
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Okay, there we go.
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I was doing it.
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It was very low.
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Look, I get letters.
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I know you re on Instagram and stuff.
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You still get letters?
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I get letters.
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I m old school.
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And they always say, we d like to hear David sing.
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My mom told me, I had karaoke at my birthday once.
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And this is a quick story.
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Ashton Kutcher was there.
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Aston Kutcher, is that your birthday when you re like 10?
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When I was 40, so a year ago.
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And you re still, okay.
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Anyway, he s a very cool dude.
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So he comes to the party and I go to sing Wanted, Dead or Alive.
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The bottom line of the story is my mom was at the party and she told me I can t sing.
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But the middle part of the story is- Wait a minute, the song, how does that go?
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Oh, I ll do it.
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Okay.
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So I actually, we go, let s do this one.
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So,
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I go, it s all the same, only the name of Jane.
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You know that song?
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Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
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That s fucking good, bud, that s good.
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You committed.
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Every chair, psh, psh, psh, turns around.
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So I start singing.
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It s like an episode of The Voice.
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And then Ashton jumps out, warn it.
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And I go, want it.
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Yep, that background part is very important.
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That sounds pretty good.
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And then he sang the rest of it.
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And I go, you don t get all the good parts.
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He got both parts.
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I think he did want it, and then he did want it.
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And I go, no, no, no.
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That s me.
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That s all I have left.
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Because now he s doing both the chorus and the other parts, whatever they re called.
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Bop, bop, bop, bop, whole song.
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I ve heard this.
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At the end, I gave him a weak high five.
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My mom was like, he fucked you too.
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I don t know if that s true, but in karaoke, being kind of selfish like that, it s called doing a Kuchner.
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I don t know if it travels.
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That s what it s called?
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Yeah, doing a Kuchner.
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Kucher.
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Kucher.
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No, he s good.
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The thing about great about Ashton.
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We re talking about Will Forte.
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Oh, oh.
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I know, we sort of drifted off.
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Well, when I think of Will Forte, I think of Ashton Kutcher.
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No, Ashton, my mom said, in fairness, we all were staring at Ashton, so no one cares if you sang.
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And I go, I get it.
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Will Forte, folks.
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Ashton Kutcher.
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Oh no, it s Will Forte, right?
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Just end there, that was good.
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Yeah, we got an Ashton plug.
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Now Ashton comes on.
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Ashton should come on.
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The fuck, is he hosted?
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No, he has hosted because he said to the cast, he goes, guys, I know I m really good looking, but I have hardly any talent, so I m just gonna make as much money as I can.
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And he s a super- Did he say that?
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Yeah, and he s a super investor.
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I mean, he s like- He gave everyone he left a hundred shares of Apple as a parting gift.
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You know what Will did once, Dana?
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You won t believe this, because I would never.
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Fucking, didn t you shave your side of your head?
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I did.
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It was for work.
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It was for work.
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I know, but it s cool.
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I don t think I could have done it, because I ve never been in a job where they didn t want me to look the exact same and be the exact same as the movie before.
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I did Racing with the Moon with Sean Penn in 1982 or something.
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I m in the trailer and I m going to play this kind of wounded insane soldier and they re just giving me this crazy military buzz cut, right?
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So then Sean Penn comes in, he s also in the military, but he s got this little pompadour and everything.
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I go, what?
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Why does Sean get this cool, that s the greatest character I ve ever seen?
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And I m just, you know, but he was, and I had to call him the name of his character.
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I thought that was hip.
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Anyway, quick story.
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This podcast is primarily about me.
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And so just want to give you a heads up on that.
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Well, how are you?
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How are you?
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I mean, what do you what s you have a baby and you re how are you?
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I m I m doing great.
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I have a baby just got just got married.
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We got engaged.
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You married your baby.
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I married my baby.
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I think I m hearing it wrong.
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She s my baby.
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Yeah.
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Uh, no, no, no.
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She s so it s got married, got engaged the Christmas, Christmas day, right before the pandemic set in.
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And then, then during the pandemic, we re kind of waiting to figure out when to get married.
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The baby popped up.
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The baby, which is part of the plan, eventually popped up a little earlier than we thought.
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And then we just got married when we were out shooting McGruber.
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We kind of realized that all our family was going to come in town to visit.
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So we said, let s surprise them and get married.
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Let me ask you a question, because David s been married a few times.
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I ve only been married once, but it s kind of it is sort of that.
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unless someone s completely cynical, there is something like referring to, I know John Mulaney did a bit about, but my wife and my husband and the clarity and the finality of a wedding ring.
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And here we are.
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I mean, how do you feel after, how do you feel about that?
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It s crazy.
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Cause you, you feel very married, uh, uh, and,
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especially when you have a baby, it s like, oh, we re this is this is we are locked in.
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But there s still something really fun about the wearing the ring.
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I said that that it s still kind of fun to say wife now.
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Yeah, it s just it s it s for some reason the weirdest part of it was when I would say fiance.
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It was just weird to say fiance because it was it was open ended.
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I was for years when I would make love with my
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uh partner my wife i would you know that would be my sex word wife i m having your wife no i made this up it s your safe sketch please and make it brilliant no i m telling you i m the one that has been married the most and i uh i think there is something cool about that i i get it
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I get it, you just know it, you know what it is, you know where you re at in the world.
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It s like one of Loren s isms and sometimes I don t know if he makes them up or he invents them.
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Marriage is a prison that everyone s trying to escape into.
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But then you never heard that one.
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I like that.
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Brilliant.
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Right.
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But then you re so happy that you have this parameter in this area that you work from.
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And then you kind of all this lovey dovey stuff keeps coming up, flowing forward.
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And, you know, my family, I got to get my family.
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I m taking my daughter here and my wife s meeting me there.
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Anyway, I m trying to get spayed married.
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So I m trying.
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I will say I heard the opposite.
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This is what I heard from my dad and it should be on a T-shirt.
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This is my dad because they had a crummy marriage and an ugly divorce, but he said two things.
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Marriage is the only game that two can play and both can lose.
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And then he said, which is very nice to tell your kid when your mom s right there.
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And then he said, the fucking you re getting is not worth the fucking you re getting.
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And I m like, can I just go to preschool?
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You had a good mentor.
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I mean, I liked, I know it sounds funny, but I liked that stuff.
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I mean, yeah, that s very honest.
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I think that- But I still wouldn t mind getting married.
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Well, is your wife, would you say your wife is sweet?
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and kind and essentially has just good values and a sense of humor.
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That d be the four.
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Yeah, she s all those things.
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She has a tremendous amount of patience, which is something that I basically need in a partner because I can try anybody s nerves.
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Yeah, we re out of our minds, comedians.
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Yeah, exactly.
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But she s wonderful and she s a great mom.
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I really got lucky because I was super on board with everything, very in love with her, and then found out she was a great cook.
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She s just coming in.
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She s just
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somehow on cue.
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Can we mic her up?
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Hello.
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Hi.
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There she is.
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She s going.
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She s there.
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She is.
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That s Olivia.
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Hi, Olivia.
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I m either Dana or David.
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Congratulations on your family.
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We ve heard all about you for the last 90 minutes.
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Oh, they can t hear me.
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Sorry.
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SPEAKER_00
Sorry.
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Now I can.
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Okay.
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Now I ve just.
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Gorgeous.
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Oh, now I can t.
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It s still just trapped in the phone.
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Oh, she can t hear you.
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She couldn t hear.
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We saw her.
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And yeah, she she she just she exudes niceness and sweetness.
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And then she s very nice.
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Her mom is in town right now.
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We re doing the, and man, I ve scored in that department too.
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She s got a family I like hanging out with and just everything is great.
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Everything is fantastic.
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Okay, so that s kind of cool.
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I just wanted to ask about that because that s a big experience.
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Dana s really got a nose for news.
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You know, it s like, okay.
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Where are you?
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Where are you guys from?
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Because, Dana, I know you re in northern California right now, right?
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Because that s where I actually have a townhome in West Hollywood where I am right now.
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So but I have my house in Mill Valley, but I spend a lot of time down here.
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And I remember you re a Bay Area from Mill Valley, are you?
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Are you my wife group?
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My wife grew up there.
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OK, I grew up in San Carlos down on the peninsula.
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We re a track home is four million now.
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But where did you grow up in Lafayette?
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Yeah, Lafayette and Moraga until I went down to UCLA in 88.
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I love it up there.
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That s that s always where I wanted to end up.
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So just quickly, because I did this for like a half hour with Tom Hanks and I got in trouble.
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But did you have a favorite gift as a kid?
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Like it could be a bike or an instrument when you were like, you know, between five and ten.
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I m always just curious about you as a kid.
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I would say the thing that first jumped out to me was Stretch Armstrong.
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Fuck.
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Oh, OK.
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I love that.
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That was unreal.
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But it was, it was, that was like Gumby, but as a soldier and it was a workout and bigger than Gumby.
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It was, yeah.
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And you d pull the thing until the arms would come out.
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And there was like a, it was from what I remember, kind of like a sappy blood.
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It was, it was red, red colored, whatever was inside it, making it, you know, gooey.
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And I think it s always fun that the character s name is what they do.
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His name is Stretch.
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There wasn t much going on.
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If you look at toys today, like Stretch Armstrong, I had one, you just pull it and it gets a little longer and then it goes back and you re like, yay, I don t know.
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But it was fucking great.
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I loved it.
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I don t know.
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One of my first standup bits when I couldn t write anything, so I d just go to toy stores and get props, because I couldn t think of a joke, but I wanted to be a comedian.
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I had a Gumby on stage.
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I d hold it up.
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I d take it out of a bag, put it up against the mic.
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I d pull its legs apart and just make the sound like...
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like I was torturing.
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You gotta laugh.
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I did stuff like you did, but in my early days, everything was avant-garde.
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By the way, let me tell you, when I was looking at this thing- But we ll get around to Will s genius later.
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No, Will s genius.
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I m going to ask him because Dana and I were doing some digging on you.
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SPEAKER_03
We had a big argument whether you re a genius, it was like a 40 minute, no.
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SPEAKER_03
We were looking and the funniest thing I saw on one of these pages was, you know, it says like trivia about you and it says, Forte s humor has been described as bizarre.
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SPEAKER_03
I love it, it s like, that s a compliment.
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I was looking on a deep dive last night and my wife was over my shoulder and she just looked very quickly and she goes, now that s funny.
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I go, thanks, honey.
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Yeah, we watched different things last night, but go ahead, Will, sorry.
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We were giving you compliments, we were inching into it.
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No, it is crazy to hear you guys saying stuff like this, because I ll be honest, I was a little nervous coming on here.
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I m such big fans of your guys that I was like, oh, I hope I don t clam up around them.
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And David, I ve seen you so many times.
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Dana, I only met you once at the SNL 40th, but that was, you know, I just, I have such tremendous respect for you guys and love you guys, your heroism.
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I would be, as an attorney, I would make the case in a courtroom that you have a lane that s so specific, and I don t think anyone occupied it in quite the same way.
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The potato chip, I m just going with you and Sudeikis, the potato chip NASA thing, John Hamm sex offender, the spelling bee thing, and then the dance.
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where Peyton Manning ended up dancing and McGroover Sensitively Train if anyone s listening wants to see what I mean those are pretty good representation that s a real nice assortment pack.
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I had to dig on the Peyton Manning one to go to Vimeo because YouTube wouldn t show it so I had to get into a Vimeo situation.
1
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Oh yeah I think it s because of the song if there s you know the song that
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It kicks it out of certain sites because it doesn t want to pay for the song to be heard over and over again.
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Just because we may not get to this later, I just wanted to ask very quickly about MacGruber and Richard Dean Anderson because
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I ve been watching with one of my sons who s a sci-fi fanatic.
1
SPEAKER_02
We re watching Stargate and there s 220 episodes.
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So I ve become a super fan of Richard Dean Anderson.
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Yeah.
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And then I know he did that commercial with you and he was on SNL.
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Just seems like an incredibly nice guy.
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Anyway, I just wanted to bring him up so I could tell my son I did.
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Done nice this guy because we, we, uh,
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We had been doing mcgrouber s for a while and then we got a chance to do a super bowl commercial which uh, uh, Like pepsi had approached lauren and said hey Do you want to take an snl sketch and turn it into a commercial and somehow he picked?
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Mcgrouber and then when he told pepsi that that mcgrouber was what he wanted to go with They quickly bowed out and said well, you know what?
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Maybe we don t want to do a super bowl commercial So lauren said you know what?
1
SPEAKER_01
Let s keep making this thing
1
SPEAKER_01
and just make it good enough that they ll wanna do it.
1
SPEAKER_01
So we said, all right, and rallied the troops and we did it and brought Richard Dean Anderson in and we decided because there was no guarantee that this was gonna go anywhere, we would make a sketch for the show at the same time.
1
SPEAKER_01
So we got to hang around with him.
1
SPEAKER_01
for a whole day once.
1
SPEAKER_01
And he was so cool.
1
SPEAKER_01
And he talked about this is way before the movie came about.
1
SPEAKER_01
So he talked about all about how he had been watching the Magrubers with his 10 year old daughter.
1
SPEAKER_01
And it was very sweet.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then and then after the movie came out, it took a pretty hard turn into very dirty territory.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I don t I don t think they watched that one.
1
SPEAKER_03
I have two questions, Dana.
1
SPEAKER_03
One is just a statement that my first year of SNL, I think I was on about a year and a half and I was
2
SPEAKER_02
making 1,500 a show a week.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then I got out of the blue, got offered a Diet Pepsi Super Bowl commercial.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I was so excited.
2
SPEAKER_02
And my manager, Gervitz, Dana and I are the same guy.
2
SPEAKER_02
He goes, still got to run it by Lorne.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I go, why does Lorne give a fuck?
2
SPEAKER_02
So I go, okay, tell him.
2
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, yeah, sorry, I said no.
2
SPEAKER_02
I go,
2
SPEAKER_02
No, what?
2
SPEAKER_02
I didn t know that was possible.
2
SPEAKER_02
Like he said no to my, it s not, no, not time, not now.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I go, I think it was 250 grand.
2
SPEAKER_02
I was like, blah, blah, I have to.
2
SPEAKER_02
Anyway, so that was a bummer.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then the other thing is my assistant, sounds so richy rich, but this girl that works with me was, I ve known her forever.
2
SPEAKER_02
And she was like a fake assistant because she was just like, we were friends, but she would help me with stuff.
2
SPEAKER_02
So she started dating Richard.
2
SPEAKER_02
And so I would see him here and there, and then she got pregnant, and then that daughter is Wiley, I think, and then I know her.
2
SPEAKER_02
So I know his daughter, and I know him, because I see him through her.
2
SPEAKER_02
So they didn t get married, but they had this great daughter, and I had seen him a few times, and he was a fucking cool dude, and I knew you guys were doing that thing, and I m like, this is flattering.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s cool to be part of that whole thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, this was, you know, MacGruber would not exist without MacGyver.
2
SPEAKER_00
And he was cool.
2
SPEAKER_02
Everyone thought he was cool.
2
SPEAKER_01
This girl was like, all the girls were crazy about him.
2
SPEAKER_01
In Stargate, what he s doing as kind of a light leading man and the quips and the way he plays it is like perfection.
2
SPEAKER_01
Anyway, to the commercial.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, he s so good.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s really not easy to do.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I think he ad-libbed a lot of his lines, but just really good.
2
SPEAKER_01
When in 1988, I think, or 89, anyway, Hans and Franz was offered Just Do It, the campaign from Nike.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it was just do it.
2
SPEAKER_01
We were going to start the campaign.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then Lauren had to call me and I was going to do what, you know, because we all thought we were Bob Dylan or the Beatles or something.
2
SPEAKER_01
So you don t sell out later on.
2
SPEAKER_01
Later on, there were, you know, conehead oven mix in the SNL store.
2
SPEAKER_01
But Lauren at the time, it s not what we do here.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s not that thing.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s like, you know, so.
2
SPEAKER_01
Of course.
2
SPEAKER_01
But everyone learned that all the hippies grew up.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s like the movie The Big Chill with, you know, like, oh, we got to get money.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s not it s not corny to make money.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
So anyway, I have a question.
2
SPEAKER_00
Can I go back?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
I want to hear what you have to say.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I was just going to say, when you bring up Hans and Franz, I will every once in a while go hiking.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s been a while, but hiking with Kevin Nealon.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Do you keep in touch with him?
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Anyone that s part of your team when you re there, they re like your soldier buddies.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
But the sweetest person I ve just, you know, I, he married, I went through the groundling system with his wife, Susan.
2
SPEAKER_00
So, so, you know, I, I kind of got to know him later on once they were together, but man, what a, what a gentle, delightful, so funny.
2
SPEAKER_02
And such throwaway dry jokes.
2
SPEAKER_02
He s so clever.
2
SPEAKER_02
He just says, so funny.
2
SPEAKER_01
When we would do Hans and Franz,
2
SPEAKER_01
Uh, and it was, it was really Kevin s driving element of it that once we were on the phone laughing about it, we were trying to create characters.
2
SPEAKER_01
And when Kevin said, yeah, and if you don t think we could do this, we could very easily come to your house.
2
SPEAKER_01
Once we knew we were never going to lift weights.
2
SPEAKER_01
We re only going to scream at this imaginary.
2
SPEAKER_01
We re so paranoid.
2
SPEAKER_01
And if you doubt us, we will do this.
2
SPEAKER_01
But right as we were at the music, we got stuff on, we re on 8H, we re about to start the sketch and Kevin s just being Kevin Nealon.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then he would look at me and I swear his whole face, his IQ would go down like 100 points.
2
SPEAKER_01
Like in a second.
2
SPEAKER_01
Always made me laugh right before we started.
2
SPEAKER_01
He would just like cross his eyes or something, but he instantly became incredibly stupid.
2
SPEAKER_01
Hear me now, believe me later.
2
SPEAKER_01
I like that one.
2
SPEAKER_01
Listen to me now, believe me later.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, let me tell you something.
2
SPEAKER_01
We could stretch your buttocks out.
2
SPEAKER_01
You re lucky there s not a campfire here, because your buttocks are like soft like marshmallows.
2
SPEAKER_01
That one I did like.
2
SPEAKER_01
I didn t feel... I like all the compliments.
2
SPEAKER_01
That one, I like the humor, but can we just for a second... One second.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t want to lose...
2
SPEAKER_01
The, the, uh, did you ever make the sketches that I looked at?
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, can we, let s take one of them or you can pick one you want to talk about or just when you want to talk.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, you pick it.
2
SPEAKER_01
You pick it.
2
SPEAKER_00
You pick it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, I want to go back and turn it around and ask you guys a couple of questions.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s allowed, this is a conversation, I guess, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
John, well, I just mentioned a few.
2
SPEAKER_01
The sex offender thing is crazy brilliant.
2
SPEAKER_01
The spelling bee thing, how long it went on and the multiple layers of laughs as the audience, you know, and then Jack Black singing at the end.
2
SPEAKER_01
The dancing, one thing stood out, not only was your dancing and the coach,
2
SPEAKER_01
So fucking funny.
2
SPEAKER_01
But then when Peyton Manning got up and I guess he s six, four to 40 and how how light on his feet was like that double double.
2
SPEAKER_01
Right.
2
SPEAKER_01
So talk about any of those.
2
SPEAKER_01
I can t pick a favorite.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ll go in order.
2
SPEAKER_00
The the spelling bee was one I used to do at the groundlings for years and years.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I I
2
SPEAKER_00
you know, probably definitely one of my two or three favorites of things I used to do at the ground link.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I kept trying to put it up at the show and, and I didn t get up.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no, no, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
You, you, you, for people who don t know what the process is like, you put something up once.
2
SPEAKER_00
you get you if it goes well at the table sometimes it just doesn t get picked but but you can put it up maybe a second time but if it doesn t get picked after the second time then then you just don t put it up it s a little stinky go ahead how many times i put it up five times oh gross okay five times
2
SPEAKER_00
And then Jack Black was the final person and he said, Oh, we got to do this.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I, you know, we wrote him the song at the beginning, but it was, it was so fun to get to do that there.
2
SPEAKER_00
Cause you know, it just, it kind of reminds you of the long
2
SPEAKER_00
the long journey from groundlings to the, I don t know, it s very fun to do that there.
2
SPEAKER_01
I think Cowbell, Will s, the other Will, Cowbell, didn t that, either it got canned after the dress show or whatever, but it took a while.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then when Walken came in, it just went boom.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
I remember hearing that.
2
SPEAKER_02
Having the host on your team helps.
2
SPEAKER_02
I m sorry.
2
SPEAKER_01
And we can t imagine another human being saying more cowbell better than walking.
2
SPEAKER_02
I felt funny.
2
SPEAKER_02
It was when you said, can you spell it was hilarious.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then when you, uh, and then when you were doing the letters, I pictured Wally or someone just holding a million cue cards, just going, I m like, I hope it s not one letter per card.
2
SPEAKER_01
Or did you have it memorized from the ground?
2
SPEAKER_00
The scary thing about that is, is I remembered going out on stage.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was,
2
SPEAKER_00
Really in an area, it was the last thing before the musical performance, it was the Christmas show, and I remember looking down, it was like,
2
SPEAKER_00
1252 or something, we were going out there.
2
SPEAKER_00
I knew that Neil Young still had to perform a whole song and then they had to see everything, you know, they had to see the whole ice skating stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
Everyone was, they wanted to shoot us down.
2
SPEAKER_01
This is great inside baseball.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I was like, I probably would have gone on for another, you know, 45 seconds or something.
2
SPEAKER_00
You had to rush a bit that s based on being slow.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh really?
2
SPEAKER_01
That was a short version?
2
SPEAKER_00
Anyway, I was yeah, I just was in the back of my mind.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was like, are they going to give me this thing?
2
SPEAKER_00
And then, you know, sometimes every once in a while they ll cut off of a sketch, like in the middle of it.
2
SPEAKER_00
It doesn t happen very often, but.
2
SPEAKER_01
But to your performance, you know, as someone who does this, that just you were so patient.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
You you never pushed.
2
SPEAKER_01
You never blink.
2
SPEAKER_01
You never I mean,
2
SPEAKER_01
You were so straight with it.
2
SPEAKER_02
On a sketch, you re supposed to be speeding up quietly, like on the side, you know, the pressure s like, get the fuck off, get this thing done.
2
SPEAKER_02
And you re like, nope, this is how slow it goes.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s not funny if I don t.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s easy for a performer to, sorry, David, to pull the ripcord a little bit and slightly wink or do something a little high pitched or try to get a little laugh in the middle because, but you never, you never told the line.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s like,
2
SPEAKER_01
You never, ever, ever winked at all.
2
SPEAKER_02
I think they know with will it s like going to be like that.
2
SPEAKER_02
Go ahead.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, just for, you know, for sure.
2
SPEAKER_00
Having a chance to do that so many I must have done that 40 or 50 times at the ground length.
2
SPEAKER_00
So so it really gives you the pacing.
2
SPEAKER_00
You get a little confidence in in what what it is and clarity on on what what it is that
2
SPEAKER_01
And I don t know if that was... I mean, I wouldn t compare it at all, but Churchill is kind of almost like a vaudeville sketch, but whatever.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I d done it in the clubs as part of my stand-up, and then the minute Victoria Jackson said something, and then I said, well, isn t that special?
2
SPEAKER_01
And I got to laugh like I did in the club.
2
SPEAKER_01
It did totally, it helped really relax me.
2
SPEAKER_02
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3
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember, what was your first thing you ever did on the show?
3
SPEAKER_01
What, what, both of you, uh, what was, do you remember that very first thing?
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think Dana was churchless.
3
SPEAKER_03
It was the very first thing.
3
SPEAKER_03
I came on the show with Phil Hartman and Jan Hooks.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
And we, it was our, uh, very first show, we were in the cold opening and I was a game show psychic.
3
SPEAKER_03
So Phil was the game show host.
3
SPEAKER_03
Jan was playing like a frumpy, you know, motherly character.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I was like this, uh, kind of a genius.
3
SPEAKER_03
Like I would answer before,
3
SPEAKER_03
Phil could ask the question.
3
SPEAKER_03
So at one point, and I was doing a Garth type character based on my brother, I d go, meteor.
3
SPEAKER_03
And he hadn t even asked the question.
3
SPEAKER_03
Meteor.
3
SPEAKER_03
Oh no, we have to ask the question.
3
SPEAKER_03
Meteor.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then this giant meteor came down and killed Jan or something.
3
SPEAKER_03
But that was my first one.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I was levitating.
3
SPEAKER_03
I mean, I wasn t quite in my body, you know, I mean, I was like anyone else.
3
SPEAKER_03
I was playing at a pizza parlor.
3
SPEAKER_03
I was barely, it was just a stand up in July.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then suddenly I m a Saturday Night Live.
3
SPEAKER_03
So tell us your story.
3
SPEAKER_03
Your experience with your first thing on SNL.
3
SPEAKER_01
Mine was I was in a sketch.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was Matt Damon was hosting and it was a sketch about Hannibal Lecter in college.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I was all I have to say is, dude, I told you he was gay.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s the only thing I had to say, and I almost couldn t say the words.
3
SPEAKER_01
I couldn t remember.
3
SPEAKER_01
I saw it coming up, and I m like, is my mouth, are the muscles going to remember what to do?
3
SPEAKER_01
And somehow it came out, but it was fucking terrifying.
3
SPEAKER_02
Do you remember what color you were on your cue cards?
3
SPEAKER_02
I used to ask for green.
3
SPEAKER_02
No, I asked for blue, I think.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think I was green.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think it was green.
3
SPEAKER_02
It s not funny.
3
SPEAKER_02
You go, I want this.
3
SPEAKER_02
And Wally would go, I think Wally was there for you guys.
3
SPEAKER_02
Here we go, what do you want?
3
SPEAKER_02
And then I watch Farley squint his, I go, you re actually hurting your head, you re squinting so hard.
3
SPEAKER_02
Because he doesn t, he wouldn t wear his glasses.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I go, at some point, you re gonna have to wear them.
3
SPEAKER_02
David, what was your first thing?
3
SPEAKER_02
My first one, thank you, Will.
3
SPEAKER_02
Dana never asks me questions about me.
3
SPEAKER_02
Dana.
3
SPEAKER_02
Heard it, been there.
3
SPEAKER_02
I was...
3
SPEAKER_02
well i was brought on with rob schneider and the end of the season for four shows so i went a week ahead and watched one i met you know i saw love it and i watch just to see what it was like even though you have no idea unless you re part of it i m just watching on holy shit this moves fast and it s smaller than you think and all this and so i go back and i think one of those four shows i didn t write anything that got on maybe few update jokes and then.
3
SPEAKER_02
there was something about casualties of war with Michael J. Fox was coming out.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I got to do on a weekend update and it went in limbo, which means you re not at the desk, you re somewhere else with a backdrop.
3
SPEAKER_02
So it looks like I m in a jungle.
3
SPEAKER_02
And so Dennis is like, I m fucking spudly.
3
SPEAKER_02
And now we re going out with Mike Fox or whatever, casualties of war.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I m in an army uniform, like, hey Sarge, you gotta give me a minute on this here, you know?
3
SPEAKER_02
Anyway, I do it and then he goes, thanks, Mike Fox.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then they go, Kenny Amon, bless his heart.
3
SPEAKER_02
I love Kenny.
3
SPEAKER_02
They forgot to put my card at the beginning.
3
SPEAKER_02
It was just a card saying featuring and you wouldn t be in the show.
3
SPEAKER_02
I wouldn t have my name at the beginning unless I was in it.
3
SPEAKER_02
And so when I was in it, I get paid at 1,500 bucks and they give me featuring up front and David s featuring David s face, but they forgot.
3
SPEAKER_02
And so people thought it was Dana or Mike Myers.
3
SPEAKER_02
They didn t know who I was.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I died out on that for months.
3
SPEAKER_02
And it fucking, all summer I was like, God damn it.
3
SPEAKER_03
Michael J Fox was awesome.
3
SPEAKER_03
Thanks a lot.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh yeah, Dana.
3
SPEAKER_02
I just started smoking, it was so good.
3
SPEAKER_02
Dana and Mike heard about it and Dennis is like, they fucked you, guy.
3
SPEAKER_01
So wait, that was your first time on camera was like toward the end of a season?
3
SPEAKER_01
I had a whole thing.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it was like second to last show.
3
SPEAKER_03
He came in late in the season, you know, he was staggered in.
3
SPEAKER_03
Did you come in at the beginning of the season?
3
SPEAKER_01
That s like Sudeikis.
3
SPEAKER_01
Sudeikis was the same thing, had been a writer for a while and then was, you know, one of the last couple of shows of his second season, I think.
3
SPEAKER_01
Got bumped up to the bigs?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I was at the beginning.
3
SPEAKER_01
I came in 2002 with Fred Armisen.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay, so yeah, you were the normal beginning.
3
SPEAKER_03
I don t know if you want to talk about, if you ve already talked about this, but I do think it s funny when I, that you, you were had it, you had, you were writing for Bonnie and Terry Turner.
3
SPEAKER_03
Basically you had nice network TV jobs, third rock.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, that was for Bonnie and Terry Turner.
3
SPEAKER_03
And that movie that I was in Dana.
3
SPEAKER_03
Brady Bunch?
3
SPEAKER_03
No, that was Tommy Boy.
3
SPEAKER_03
Tommy Boy.
3
SPEAKER_03
Oh, Tommy Boy.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they were great.
3
SPEAKER_03
So when you auditioned for SNL, apparently you weren t as nervous as you normally would have been because you kind of had this other job.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I guess you were swearing or you did, what was your audition process like?
3
SPEAKER_03
Were you really nervous or were you cavalier because you were on the fence about taking the job or is that all just Wikipedia stuff?
3
SPEAKER_01
There was an element of it that I was not nervous for.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was doing a Groundlings show during the hiatus.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was working at Seventy Show at the time.
3
SPEAKER_01
And so I did did a series of Groundling shows during that hiatus period.
3
SPEAKER_01
And Lauren came to one of those shows.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that was where I was super loose and because like I had a job and I knew that I couldn t do anything.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I also thought like, oh, they d never like.
3
SPEAKER_01
All right.
3
SPEAKER_03
Kind of thought, well, I m too busy to do SNL.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
Well, just like I m contractually obligated to this other job that I love.
3
SPEAKER_01
And and and also like, you know,
3
SPEAKER_01
they re not going to like me.
3
SPEAKER_01
I ve got no chance anyway.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m an acquired taste and you re a rock.
3
SPEAKER_03
So did you destroy, did you destroy that night?
3
SPEAKER_01
I did.
3
SPEAKER_01
I had this sketch that went so well.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was crazy.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s what, you know, at the groundlings, uh, uh, when you re in the main stage show, you ll do a, uh, you ll have an opening of a show and that was the opening of this show.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then you ll do the show for two or three months.
3
SPEAKER_01
And this sketch went so well and then bombed every other time that I ever did it.
3
SPEAKER_01
It was just somehow meant to be.
3
SPEAKER_01
It expired.
3
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, but then I went to, so they asked me to audition and then I was terrified.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, going there.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it was the scariest.
3
SPEAKER_03
Were you guys nervous to audition?
3
SPEAKER_03
Well, were you an 8-H kind of doing that or where was your other audition?
3
SPEAKER_03
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, no.
3
SPEAKER_01
The first thing was at the Groundling.
3
SPEAKER_01
So what Lauren came to was just our set Groundling show.
3
SPEAKER_01
Nobody knew that Lauren was coming.
3
SPEAKER_01
It wasn t, it wasn t a, an SNL showcase.
3
SPEAKER_01
They just happened to show up on this night.
3
SPEAKER_01
He wore a mustache.
3
SPEAKER_02
Hello, just me.
3
SPEAKER_03
Did he bring a, any kind of movie star?
3
SPEAKER_03
Cause I, he had share when he saw me and with Melanie Hustle, he had Quincy Jones.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
I was a little club on the West side and Lauren walked in and then share walked in and the head of the NBC network at the time, Brandon Tartikoff.
3
SPEAKER_01
Do you believe it s crazy to dream?
3
SPEAKER_01
So did you know he was supposed to come?
3
SPEAKER_03
I was told.
3
SPEAKER_03
And that s why I was able to get it to this little club, because I d done the whole cattle call at the Comedy Store a couple of times.
3
SPEAKER_03
20 comedians doing five minutes, no MC, just one after the other.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I followed Sam Kenison at midnight.
3
SPEAKER_03
He levitated the room.
3
SPEAKER_03
Literally, there was structural damage to the to the room.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then no one ever got my name right.
3
SPEAKER_03
And now Dana Garneau.
3
SPEAKER_03
Very.
3
SPEAKER_03
I m not kidding.
3
SPEAKER_03
Often, Dana.
3
SPEAKER_03
It was always Dana and then Garvey, Dana Garvey.
3
SPEAKER_03
So then I just complete dead silence.
3
SPEAKER_03
Isn t that special?
3
SPEAKER_03
But I hear Jimmy Stewart, you know, so that Lauren s coming back around.
3
SPEAKER_03
So I wanted to go play this comedy club with 100 people in it.
3
SPEAKER_03
That was a normal audience.
3
SPEAKER_03
And Rosie O Donnell was headlining that week.
3
SPEAKER_03
I didn t even know her.
3
SPEAKER_03
And she agreed because I was bringing Lauren.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I met her there.
3
SPEAKER_03
She seemed like she was like so worldly and confident, you know?
3
SPEAKER_03
So I said, maybe I should go on first.
3
SPEAKER_03
So I went on first, but I had 40 minutes.
3
SPEAKER_03
She s good though, she kills.
3
SPEAKER_03
She s great.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I thank her for this.
3
SPEAKER_03
40 minutes instead of five.
3
SPEAKER_03
And that s kinda, and then I auditioned later at a studio.
3
SPEAKER_03
That s a whole nother story.
3
SPEAKER_03
Wait a second, you were supposed to do five, you did 40?
3
SPEAKER_03
No, this was a regular comedy club.
3
SPEAKER_03
So I just squeezed in and did 40.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, you just did a guest.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then Rosie closed and we had an MC.
3
SPEAKER_03
So that, that s why I got the show.
3
SPEAKER_03
If I d done five minutes, no way.
3
SPEAKER_03
Cause everyone goes, we can tell if they re funny, even if they re not getting laughs.
3
SPEAKER_03
I know if they re funny, fuck you.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, you don t.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, you don t.
4
SPEAKER_00
They gotta hear the laughs.
4
SPEAKER_00
So then when you go and do the audition, was it the same process?
4
SPEAKER_00
I assume it was the same thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Do a couple characters, do a couple impersonations.
4
SPEAKER_01
Did you ever go into 8H, Dana?
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I did that in LA and I did it, you know, like 10 people were there and Jim Carrey went up and Phil went up and at a given point I ran out of stuff and Lorne said, do you have anything else?
4
SPEAKER_01
Is there anything else you have besides what we ve seen?
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, sickening.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh no.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I realized later, at least I thought, I ve never asked Lorne, were you testing my nerves?
4
SPEAKER_01
Did you wanna see if you could handle the pressure?
4
SPEAKER_01
But then I had a little thing called Chopping Broccoli.
4
SPEAKER_01
You mind if I play the piano?
4
SPEAKER_01
Did you play Chop Chop Broccoli at the end?
4
SPEAKER_01
I did, of course.
4
SPEAKER_01
Chopping Broccoli.
4
SPEAKER_01
I really just make sounds.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s my thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t want to say words.
4
SPEAKER_01
My Biden is like... You know what Chopping Broccoli is to me?
4
SPEAKER_02
It s one of those ones where I think I m the only one that likes it.
4
SPEAKER_02
I go, this is so fucking funny.
4
SPEAKER_02
I bet no one gets it.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then everyone else is like, chopping broccoli is the funniest thing he does.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, it is?
4
SPEAKER_00
One of the all-time classics.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I was thrilled just to hear with my own ears you saying that.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s a story that you re you re telling to me and david that s real she chopped chop.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s so stupid i ve been on shows and theaters in the round and someone will hit my back and it s a stock of broccoli like people being broccoli just throw that you know your q you re like chopping back up.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I think Lorne liked it because it s the it s the idea of someone running out of creative, you know, getting all this money and success and then essentially phoning it in.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, you re like, you like what was behind it.
4
SPEAKER_01
But anyway, let s get back to it.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have a question for Will Forte, one of the three big Wills.
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I like asking your questions of you.
4
SPEAKER_01
Hey, Will, it sounds like someone should get his own podcast.
4
SPEAKER_02
I know you re a good questioner.
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh, you re like, I would never do.
4
SPEAKER_02
No offense.
4
SPEAKER_02
But Will, you wrote for Letterman, and my only question for that is, I actually have a couple, but I would say, is it true that you don t see Letterman much or see him at all when you write for him?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes, that s true.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I came in, I was a lower level writer, never made it past the lower level.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was only there for about nine months.
4
SPEAKER_00
Letterman was one of my,
4
SPEAKER_00
Comedy, sensibility, shapers growing up.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah, for sure.
4
SPEAKER_00
And we all revered David.
4
SPEAKER_00
But I just wasn t as good at writing for him as I thought I would be.
4
SPEAKER_00
I thought it d be this natural match.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I still like, he s still one of my all-time heroes.
4
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, I barely, you would see him if you had written
4
SPEAKER_00
something that was there was going to be a pre tape on and you had to go out on the shoot or or if you re like a department head or, you know, you had to run stuff by him, you d go down or if you walked a long way down the hallway.
4
SPEAKER_02
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_02
You run into.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I never talked to him as a guest.
4
SPEAKER_01
Did you talk to him as a guest?
4
SPEAKER_01
Either?
4
SPEAKER_00
I did.
4
SPEAKER_00
I went backstage twice.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no, no.
4
SPEAKER_00
But you did a show, though.
4
SPEAKER_00
You did a show as a guest.
4
SPEAKER_00
You mean behind the scenes.
4
SPEAKER_01
Behind the scenes?
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I don t think I ever talked to him.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was always just on air, which is, I got why he wanted it to be like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Ellen did that, too.
4
SPEAKER_00
For a second, I thought you were saying you had never been on the show, and I m like, wait.
4
SPEAKER_02
I thought he said he went on the show and then didn t talk to Letterman.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m like, on the show you didn t?
4
SPEAKER_02
No, that s weird.
4
SPEAKER_01
So, Will, if I can call you that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Is this over, are we starting?
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I wanna, can we, let s see.
4
SPEAKER_01
The sex offender one, that s another one.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that one, so the sex offender one, Colin Jost wrote that.
4
SPEAKER_00
I got the good fortune of being in that one, for some reason he thought of me when he thought sex offender.
4
SPEAKER_01
You can just play off kilter.
4
SPEAKER_01
It would seem like perfect casting if you didn t write it.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was Jon Hamm and you were a creepy but awkward weirdo.
4
SPEAKER_01
And it was that Collins thing, just a few like, but that s not me, that s you.
4
SPEAKER_01
What?
4
SPEAKER_01
That catchphrase was that.
4
SPEAKER_00
I basically did exactly as he wrote it.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like he just did that catchphrase for a second.
4
SPEAKER_00
What?
4
SPEAKER_00
It s just a high pitch.
4
SPEAKER_01
But yeah, there was something.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I m not you.
4
SPEAKER_01
You re not me.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Anyway.
4
SPEAKER_00
So the wage.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it s yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it s a guy going up to to trick or treat.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Dressed as a sex offender.
4
SPEAKER_00
And he s as part he s
4
SPEAKER_00
So somebody s like, wait, are you a sex offender?
4
SPEAKER_00
And it s like, no, no, no, I m dressed as a sex offender.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then and then it comes out that he does have a form for the people to sign, acknowledging that he s moving into the neighborhood.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then it s like, wait, this is part of the costume or like that s like, yeah, part of the costume.
4
SPEAKER_02
And who was who or who is who in the sketch?
4
SPEAKER_00
I would say.
4
SPEAKER_00
John Hamm was the guy who I was trying to get to sign the form.
4
SPEAKER_00
Who played it in great strength, man.
4
SPEAKER_02
If you ever had the host go, I like your part better, let s switch.
4
SPEAKER_02
Only Glenn Close.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have.
4
SPEAKER_02
Did that?
4
SPEAKER_00
You have had a host take your- What?
4
SPEAKER_00
What happened?
4
SPEAKER_00
What happened?
4
SPEAKER_00
What?
4
SPEAKER_00
Tell the whole story.
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I m sorry.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m subtly interesting.
4
SPEAKER_02
Everyone does Hans and Franz.
4
SPEAKER_02
I did a- Sorry.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s actually sort of an interesting story, because it was a sketch where I played a receptionist, and I would say, oh, and you are, and you are, and this is regarding, and it was one of the ones that was hard to get on.
4
SPEAKER_02
I had put it through read-through, and I couldn t get it on.
4
SPEAKER_02
But they thought it was kind of a funny idea.
4
SPEAKER_02
It wasn t just a straight set up punchline.
4
SPEAKER_02
It was more of an attitude.
4
SPEAKER_02
So Lauren liked that.
4
SPEAKER_02
And even Downey liked it, which helps.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I don t think Franklin did.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was the receptionist, you have trouble getting past.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
He stops you because he thinks they re better than you, something like that.
4
SPEAKER_02
And so Bowie was the guest as music with Tin Machine.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I wrote it with Bowie coming in.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then they sent it to his hotel, and Marcy Klein said, hey, Bowie wants to call you.
4
SPEAKER_02
There s a message in my little, we had mailboxes back then, and you pull it out from NBC, and it says, David Bowie, this hotel, this fake name, call him as soon as possible.
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, did they send it to him?
4
SPEAKER_02
I just put him in, I didn t even put a read through, I don t think, because he wasn t there.
4
SPEAKER_02
And so I called him and he answers and it s fucking Bowie and I m like, hey man, and he s like, this is so fucking funny.
4
SPEAKER_02
This is exactly my life and these people I see.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, one tweak, can I play the receptionist?
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, that s the funnier part.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I go, oh, well.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, I mean, I just come in as David Bowie.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s kind of boring.
4
SPEAKER_02
Everyone s seen that.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s fucking stupid.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I go, he goes, you could play me.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I go, I mean, I could.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I said, no.
4
SPEAKER_02
You said no?
4
SPEAKER_01
When Neil Young asked to play the church lady, I just put my foot down and said, Neil, I m sorry, this is my man.
4
SPEAKER_01
I love you like a brother.
4
SPEAKER_02
No, but literally you said no to him.
4
SPEAKER_02
I said no.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I am the most colossal pussy, ask anyone.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I was like, I just can t.
4
SPEAKER_02
I go, you know how it s like,
4
SPEAKER_02
fucking like a character like Wayne s World or something, like you want to do it again.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, yeah, yeah, okay, sure.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he was not rude.
4
SPEAKER_02
He was just like, ah.
4
SPEAKER_02
Disappointed.
4
SPEAKER_02
Okay, well, playing myself isn t that fun, you know, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I go, I get it.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, okay, all good.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then the rest of the week I wasn t in the show and I was like, fuck.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I d see Bowie and he s like,
4
SPEAKER_02
Anyway, Gene Genie again.
4
SPEAKER_02
And so I got, and then at good nights, he said, hey, sorry, man, I kind of, I get what was going on and I shouldn t have been like a little chilly.
4
SPEAKER_01
Really?
4
SPEAKER_01
Wow, now it s like a sweet full circle.
4
SPEAKER_02
I used to see him, I saw him, he was at my young comedian special in the audience when Dennis hosted.
4
SPEAKER_02
in the audience and watching.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I saw him with Bobcat.
4
SPEAKER_02
I went to his house.
4
SPEAKER_02
So I d seen him, I think before that, just briefly.
4
SPEAKER_02
So it wasn t too terrifying.
4
SPEAKER_02
It was still weird to call him, but to shut him down.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then after that was just weird.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then to never go, you mightn t.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he goes, well, what if the sketch never gets on?
4
SPEAKER_02
I m like, God, how do you know the show this well?
4
SPEAKER_02
It s so true.
4
SPEAKER_02
What if it doesn t get on, I m fucking blowing it, and he s like, it ll get on if I do it.
4
SPEAKER_01
I said it before, but I ran into him and Jagger with Dennis and Lovitz at the cafe after the show.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, there s Bowie and Jagger, should we say hi?
4
SPEAKER_01
Bowie and Jagger smoking a joint at the Columbus Cafe.
4
SPEAKER_01
Two biggest stars on this planet.
4
SPEAKER_01
Very well, very famous, you know, and then Jagger kind of likes the girls with Dennis or whatever But then we we went downtown with Bowie to a disco type place and they wanted to dance He showed us how to plant your left foot
5
SPEAKER_02
and do a spin.
5
SPEAKER_02
So he was another one-off genius like in his own lane, miracle of talent.
5
SPEAKER_02
Just wanted to throw that in there for the fans.
5
SPEAKER_01
When Corey Feldman was at Cantor s, I walked right up to him.
5
SPEAKER_00
Those are, that is basically my level of story.
5
SPEAKER_01
I told Urkel, listen, buddy.
5
SPEAKER_01
Sorry.
5
SPEAKER_01
No, believe me, those things, you know, when you re in SNL, some people come to the show, you walk by and you go, like at the 40th, I was shocked.
5
SPEAKER_01
I was saying to Dana, like, for once, I almost felt comfortable talking to people that are out of my range because they were on my turf for once.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And it was like,
5
SPEAKER_00
I that year was when the movie Nebraska came out and I forgot about that.
5
SPEAKER_02
Congratulations.
5
SPEAKER_02
Thanks.
5
SPEAKER_00
I somehow got to got to be a part of that movie.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s I still have no idea how and then got to go to the Oscars because it was nominated
5
SPEAKER_00
And that was the same year of the 40th and the 40th was way cooler than the Oscars.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I mean, it was but it was, you know, like the Oscars.
5
SPEAKER_00
I feel like I have no business being there.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then, you know, and and then I met the 40th and I did feel a little bit of ownership, like, hey, I m a part of this thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
And even, you know, and I still, you know, bow down to all you guys.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, just you guys were the ones who
5
SPEAKER_00
paved the way for all of us, you know, down the road.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I, so I was still so, so nervous around you guys.
5
SPEAKER_00
And Dana, I remember, I ll always remember this moment.
5
SPEAKER_00
We, we got to meet at the after party for the first time.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then we re talking for a while, and somebody s playing a Prince song in the background.
5
SPEAKER_00
And, and I m not really paying attention because I m just, you know, very excited to talk to you.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then after a while,
5
SPEAKER_00
there s like, you know, this person is playing a couple Prince songs.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then after a while you realize, oh, this isn t somebody playing a Prince song, this is Prince playing a Prince song.
5
SPEAKER_00
That was so big.
5
SPEAKER_00
And so we both kind of realized, oh, maybe we should go into this room because we were, I don t know, 20 yards away from this ballroom where Prince had just been
5
SPEAKER_00
ripping it up for 20 minutes.
5
SPEAKER_01
It was like Fallon was up there and everybody got up and jammed with- Everywhere you look, someone was famous.
5
SPEAKER_02
It was a throbbing gigantic- Let s not do plus ones.
5
SPEAKER_02
Let s keep it famous.
5
SPEAKER_02
I remember talking with Glenn Close and Sigourney Weaver, and they just seemed like two nice women over in the corner.
5
SPEAKER_02
They probably feel out of place too, because they re coming into- Everyone shrinks down a little bit, except if you re Paul McCartney or something, you re kind of this other thing.
5
SPEAKER_01
No matter where you are, you re like, I m the fucking King
5
SPEAKER_02
But I talked to Billy Crystal, everyone seems smaller, but in the same time, if you re a veteran of it, and I hate military analogies because it s not, but in the pantheon of show business, you know, there s that little like, oh, you were there, you know what it s like to, you know, have a cotton mouth and have to do a sketch or fall down or the cue cards are torn in half or someone throws up on you.
5
SPEAKER_02
So that is cool.
5
SPEAKER_01
You could talk to anyone about SNL like we re doing.
5
SPEAKER_01
We call anybody and when,
5
SPEAKER_01
they talk you know immediately even if you weren t there with me go oh is this kinda the same way when you go back by the page is a gap everything the same it s also i like that i love that oh yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah everything i mean it s a shorthand.
5
SPEAKER_02
Did you have a celebrity person that you were most excited to meet over, over those seasons or kind of starstruck or just someone that was sort of a thrill to, cause I got to sit with Willie Nelson once and sing with him and have him learn a song.
5
SPEAKER_02
You know, that was like, I remember thinking this is a SNL type moment.
5
SPEAKER_02
This is weird.
5
SPEAKER_02
This happening to me.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was, it took me several years to, to relax.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it was, it was very interesting.
5
SPEAKER_00
Uh,
5
SPEAKER_00
coming in with Fred Armisen, because Fred was the exact opposite.
5
SPEAKER_00
He seemed just so immediately ready to perform and so excited to get up on stage.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I was just terrified from week to week.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I would enjoy it as I looked back on it.
5
SPEAKER_00
But I, oh yeah, he s fantastic.
5
SPEAKER_00
And, but then the, you know, the summers would come.
5
SPEAKER_00
He couldn t wait for the summer to end and get back to the next season.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was like, I hope this thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
I get so stressed.
5
SPEAKER_01
And like July, I m like, ah, ah, it s coming.
5
SPEAKER_01
And I load up, I have one sketch ready.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then I go, I m ready this year.
5
SPEAKER_01
And I got one, the week two, I m like, what the fuck?
5
SPEAKER_01
I have nothing.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m sober.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And you go in, you go to the final show in May and you re like, I m going to spend every day just
5
SPEAKER_00
Just like a half hour thinking up ideas.
5
SPEAKER_00
I might not even turn them into full sketches, but I m going to come in with so many ideas.
5
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, you, of course, don t do any of that.
5
SPEAKER_01
I would call Marcy and go, who s the host?
5
SPEAKER_01
Who s the host?
5
SPEAKER_01
Who have you booked yet?
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, just to get a head start.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think it was my second season, the cast was in 8H and we had these reporters there, like a little press conference.
5
SPEAKER_02
Do you have any new characters?
5
SPEAKER_02
And on the spot I said, I don t, but I have a new catchphrase, which was, I got to, got to, got to, got to go.
5
SPEAKER_02
And they took it serious, it was in the New York Post and stuff, like it was a thing, they didn t realize.
5
SPEAKER_02
And then Jan was my sidekick, funny little poopy head was my name and her name was Mrs. Funny Little Poopy Head.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I d go, I got to, got to, got to go.
5
SPEAKER_02
And she would say, and I m gonna go on with them.
5
SPEAKER_02
And they took it, they thought it was great.
5
SPEAKER_01
They don t realize catchphrases are decided by the audience, basically.
5
SPEAKER_01
But I m with you guys.
5
SPEAKER_02
I feel like it s a gathering storm in a sense of anxiety when the season s starting and how will you do it.
5
SPEAKER_02
Never left me.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think I was pretty good the last 30 shows.
5
SPEAKER_02
I think the first hundred was still trying to get really relaxed.
5
SPEAKER_02
But I think what happens is the audience discovers you and you get more relaxed and it kind of builds on itself.
5
SPEAKER_02
You see it with a new cast member.
5
SPEAKER_02
Because at some point, Will, when the audience saw you come in and knew your sensibility, like by the time the Halloween thing came in, it seemed like the audience saw you and just went, oh, it s Will.
5
SPEAKER_02
We love him.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, it gets relaxing at that point, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Certainly, I think there s a point when that happens.
5
SPEAKER_00
But my point happened a little bit later because the stuff I would write would be so weird.
5
SPEAKER_00
It would always be the stuff.
5
SPEAKER_00
Toward the end of the show so so it just took longer i mean i think there are some people after i left the show.
5
SPEAKER_00
It just didn t know that i had left the show because they had never really seen me that much in the show anyway well dana was saying a nice company that up.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, no, I m thinking of someone else.
5
SPEAKER_01
No, he was saying a nice comment about you where he said, you know, because you have sort of a different vibe.
5
SPEAKER_01
So when you go out there, first of all, what I would say is people know it s coming.
5
SPEAKER_01
So when you re doing a bit, they re like, this bit is going to go sideways in a weird way where it s not the predictable structure, which is good.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, it might go zigzag where you don t see it coming.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then also, he said, you remind him a little bit of Jack Handy, which I think is genius.
5
SPEAKER_01
I think we both do.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, my God, that s a huge comment.
5
SPEAKER_01
And being like, we d see him in read-through, and he s so quiet sitting in the corner, and he s kind of giggling, he s got little glasses, and then they go, impending doom, or whatever, and it was some sketch, and it was so fucking bananas, and we re all like, god damn, I m gonna quit writing, because I don t even know what he s doing, everything is funny, and it s so weird.
5
SPEAKER_02
My first one was me and Kevin were like, there was a launch pad with a rocket and we were the guys with the binoculars.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, okay, 10, nine, eight.
5
SPEAKER_02
And then Lassie would wander underneath the rocket.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh wait, hold on, you know.
5
SPEAKER_02
And then it was Hitler.
5
SPEAKER_02
Okay, we re going.
5
SPEAKER_02
And then it was Hitler holding the Mona Lisa and Lassie.
5
SPEAKER_02
It was just, you know, just so brilliant.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, that s so awesome.
5
SPEAKER_01
So you have a thing where you ve got a different vibe, which is good to have.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, man.
5
SPEAKER_02
Well, I mean, talk about that dance you did when you were like Hitler.
5
SPEAKER_02
So the dance.
5
SPEAKER_02
How did you come up with how funny that dance was?
5
SPEAKER_00
I can t even describe it.
5
SPEAKER_00
So so the dance.
5
SPEAKER_00
Do you guys know John Lutz?
5
SPEAKER_00
Lutz was in the show 30 Rock.
5
SPEAKER_00
He played one of the writers, John Lutz.
5
SPEAKER_00
So he was a writer.
5
SPEAKER_00
On the on the show SNL and and then and now he writes for Seth Meyers but he was he came to me and he had that song casino Royale and said we gotta do something with this song and I had had this idea this was also back from the groundlings of just a.
5
SPEAKER_00
a coach who wanted to give a motivational speech and use something really stupid as the motivation.
5
SPEAKER_00
So we married those two together.
5
SPEAKER_00
We wrote the whole sketch.
5
SPEAKER_00
The dance was not even part of it.
5
SPEAKER_00
The dance, it was just like I was going to listen to the song for a long time.
5
SPEAKER_00
And right as we were about to do the sketch, I think it was right before the table read, he said, hey, why don t you dance?
5
SPEAKER_00
dancing just so people don t get bored during the song.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I said, yeah, you re probably right.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s probably a good idea.
5
SPEAKER_00
So that was a total afterthought.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then when we did it throughout the week, I
5
SPEAKER_00
I m sure you guys are.
5
SPEAKER_00
It was never quite, I mean, it was the idea that we loved, but it just wasn t hitting for some reason.
5
SPEAKER_00
And Lauren even said it went well enough in dress rehearsal that he said, you know, he
6
SPEAKER_00
it in the show, but he did say you should cut down on the dance a little bit.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then for some reason, this was, you know, most of the time, so many times you ll do the best version of the sketch at dress rehearsal and then the live show will be let down.
6
SPEAKER_00
This was like one of the only times that the
6
SPEAKER_00
sketch actually was the best version and it was just like a straight up arc and somehow the dance moves were flowing like wine and nice and crisp and I was so excited by how it went.
6
SPEAKER_00
I went longer than I was supposed to but I think he was fine because
6
SPEAKER_02
You know, the team was not into it.
6
SPEAKER_02
They were playing it very real and disappointed.
6
SPEAKER_02
And then your exuberance and what I would I refer to that as funny with the sound off.
6
SPEAKER_02
You know, I m sure there s other ways to put it to physical comedy, but cool, funny with the sound off means the audience is not listening for a punchline or anything.
6
SPEAKER_02
They have permission to just really laugh hard.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s the I love Lucy and the grapes or the chocolates.
6
SPEAKER_02
And when I did Massive Head Moon Harry,
6
SPEAKER_00
The air show was the same thing.
6
SPEAKER_00
One of my all-time favorites.
6
SPEAKER_02
With the dog, and you know, I m working with an animal going crazy, and that was just the longest laugh I d ever got, because they knew what I was in, and I did not want the prosthetic to fly off, because then that would be that secondary joke, and the sketch had worked so well.
6
SPEAKER_02
So I just decided to hold it, and then the dog went to town.
6
SPEAKER_02
So it was funny to sound, that sketch too, what you were doing, dancing like that, was that kind of thing.
6
SPEAKER_02
Like, I just get to really laugh.
6
SPEAKER_01
You know, hang on, by the way, that doll, after that sketch, Bill, I was right next to, I mean, what did I say, Bill, Will?
6
SPEAKER_01
I was right next to the stage and the dog walked by and he goes, follow that motherfucker.
6
SPEAKER_01
I go, Jesus Christ, this dog s gonna be a cast member?
6
SPEAKER_01
Well, they put more goo on the thing.
6
SPEAKER_02
They put more dog food goo in his head.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, a very smugly trick or something to put all this extra stuff, you know.
6
SPEAKER_02
You ll have fun out there.
6
SPEAKER_02
That was one of the hardest kills.
6
SPEAKER_02
Smigel wrote that?
6
SPEAKER_02
I m not sure if it was maybe Schneider or Smigel.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m not sure.
6
SPEAKER_02
I don t want to say because I m not sure if it was a group effort.
6
SPEAKER_02
But I was a participant in that as the through line and just lucky to be in the sketch.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you were in the right fucking place.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I was.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Sometimes they just are getting pennies from heaven.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it was great.
6
SPEAKER_00
That was one of the all time great.
6
SPEAKER_00
We were talking about Will and then we went into that.
6
SPEAKER_00
No, I love it.
6
SPEAKER_01
Any SNL talk is funny.
6
SPEAKER_01
I like it all.
6
SPEAKER_02
My sound went out for a second.
6
SPEAKER_02
All time what?
6
SPEAKER_02
You know, I had a glitch.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s a Wi-Fi issue.
6
SPEAKER_02
No, it s a it s a it s such a mutual a mutual thing.
6
SPEAKER_02
Have you ever people think you re weird or stuff?
6
SPEAKER_02
Because I had it once at SNL.
6
SPEAKER_02
Like literally maybe slightly off or perverted or something s wrong with you.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh sure all the time Tell me your experience only my experience.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh just no I well especially During during you already brought up that hairdo I had to have for last man on earth, which I did to myself like I thought it d be a
6
SPEAKER_00
fun idea.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then I had to have it for a month.
6
SPEAKER_00
So you d be walking along.
6
SPEAKER_00
Most of the time, it was such a crazy work schedule that I would just be kind of going back and forth to work.
6
SPEAKER_00
But every once in a while, you got to go to the store.
6
SPEAKER_01
You got to go to fucking Ralph s.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, exactly.
6
SPEAKER_00
So people already kind of
6
SPEAKER_00
we re nervous by the length of the beard before I had to shave off half of it.
6
SPEAKER_01
People at home listening, it was directly down the middle of your face.
6
SPEAKER_01
One side was like long hair and a long beard, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, once total hairiness, like the brawny, brawny guy.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
Well, brawny guy plus a year of hair growth.
6
SPEAKER_00
And then the other side is completely right down the middle, completely shaved.
6
SPEAKER_00
Eyebrow gone.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, eyebrow too?
6
SPEAKER_00
Sick.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
My dad, I had sent a picture.
6
SPEAKER_00
We shaved it on a Sunday afternoon and everyone was warning me about the eyebrow.
6
SPEAKER_00
But then I sent a picture to my dad just to say, hey, look what your son is looking like right now.
6
SPEAKER_00
And he said, oh, you re keeping the eyebrow, huh?
6
SPEAKER_00
That s a great dad voice.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, because you had to commit all the way?
6
SPEAKER_00
Daddy said to shave the eyebrows.
6
SPEAKER_02
I love that.
6
SPEAKER_02
I love that.
6
SPEAKER_02
Mine s not quite like that.
6
SPEAKER_02
It involves Steve Martin.
6
SPEAKER_02
And very quickly, Church Lady would say penis a lot when I was doing the clubs.
6
SPEAKER_02
And then the censorship guy, Mr. Clockworthy, said she can t say penis so much.
6
SPEAKER_02
So then I started to write, you re naughty, bulbous area, and you re willing and throbbing buttocks.
6
SPEAKER_02
And so I was in read through and Steve Martin was three feet away.
6
SPEAKER_02
and I m just digging into, and he s next to Lorne, I m digging into the church slate because it was early days with the character and you re naughty bulbous and you re a wicked throbbing member, you know, and I was getting into it and I heard Steve say to Lorne under his breath, what kind of mind thinks of this?
6
SPEAKER_02
Steve, one of our favorites.
6
SPEAKER_02
Naughty and bulbous and throbbing and gorged.
6
SPEAKER_01
Pulsating.
6
SPEAKER_02
It became really pornographic compared to just saying penis.
6
SPEAKER_02
And gorged, your engorged loaf is throbbing and willing.
6
SPEAKER_02
Loaf.
6
SPEAKER_02
What a sick fervor.
6
SPEAKER_02
And the censorship guy was, attaboy.
6
SPEAKER_00
That a boy.
6
SPEAKER_00
That is so funny that the guy who was in the friggin jerk and wrote the, I mean, how would he say that?
6
SPEAKER_00
You would think, oh, that s right up his alley.
6
SPEAKER_00
I took it as an incredible compliment, you know.
6
SPEAKER_00
He s, I mean, that jerk for years.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s one of my favorite all-time movies.
6
SPEAKER_02
He had a kindred spirit with you, with the absurdity, the weird, crazy, a man with two brains.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, he was an abstractionist.
6
SPEAKER_00
But so do you know what you brought up that I want to talk about?
6
SPEAKER_00
Is that doesn t it fucking drive you crazy?
6
SPEAKER_00
Excuse my swearing.
6
SPEAKER_00
I m sorry, but it really traps my eye that when the when when the standards and practices would say, oh, you can t you can t say
6
SPEAKER_00
penis that many times.
6
SPEAKER_00
But to me, it s like, oh, if you can say penis once on TV, you could say penis for the entire 30 minutes.
6
SPEAKER_00
Like, if you can say a word, say it
6
SPEAKER_00
Like, for Last Man on Earth, there was a goat piss joke that Sudeikis had told, and then he improvised off the script and said goat piss again.
6
SPEAKER_00
And it, like, made sense for the story, but they wouldn t let us say goat piss.
6
SPEAKER_00
The second time, just two of the word pisses, and it was fine to say piss, you just couldn t say it twice?
6
SPEAKER_00
It just drove me crazy.
6
SPEAKER_02
Ours evolved that eventually, which it took a while to get on.
6
SPEAKER_02
I think Tom Hanks was the host, but it was a nudist colony, so we all were shirts off.
6
SPEAKER_02
And we were all just commenting on each other.
6
SPEAKER_02
Nice penis, hey, looking good today.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I remember that.
6
SPEAKER_02
Thanks a lot, nice penis.
6
SPEAKER_02
And so we said it 300 times.
6
SPEAKER_02
So eventually, Mr. Clockworthy gave up at some point.
6
SPEAKER_01
That s when I had Andrew Brewer.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, Brewer was a ball buster, man.
6
SPEAKER_01
Brewer was, he s always like, guys, I m trying to be your friend here.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, I didn t have that.
6
SPEAKER_02
Mr. Clockworthy had buster brown shoes and little glasses and a bow tie.
6
SPEAKER_01
Who was yours, Will?
6
SPEAKER_01
Right out of Central Casting.
6
SPEAKER_00
You know what?
6
SPEAKER_00
I can t remember who would,
6
SPEAKER_01
God, who was the member right up to us and say, hey, Spade, I just read your weekend update.
6
SPEAKER_01
You cannot do.
6
SPEAKER_01
I m like, whoa, whoa.
6
SPEAKER_01
Start always shocked.
6
SPEAKER_01
What?
6
SPEAKER_01
No.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I said pussy.
6
SPEAKER_01
And then he whatever.
6
SPEAKER_01
But I got around it.
6
SPEAKER_02
You put in pussy five or ten times and go, OK, I ll just do three.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s a classic.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s a trick, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s like what the politicians do.
6
SPEAKER_02
This package is going to cost 10 trillion.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s insane.
6
SPEAKER_02
All right.
6
SPEAKER_02
Five trillion.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, it s not so much.
6
SPEAKER_02
What a bargain.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s pocket change.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
But that s and I remember during God, my standards and practice things that I remember much more clearly from the last man on earth stuff there was we had there was when I was there, you couldn t have people having sex.
6
SPEAKER_00
But you could like you could excuse me, you could have people having sex, but they couldn t be moving at all.
6
SPEAKER_00
So you had like that s how I do it.
6
SPEAKER_00
You couldn t even tell.
6
SPEAKER_00
So if Kristen Schaal and I had sex, we d have to basically say, oh, I m having such great sex with you currently right now without moving much.
6
SPEAKER_00
But then what you could do is you could do the exact same thing.
6
SPEAKER_00
But if you put it in the script, if you put it in the script that you re having sex,
6
SPEAKER_00
then you can t really move around at all.
6
SPEAKER_00
But if you just say, are engaged in foreplay, you can be doing the exact same thing, but then be moving around a little bit.
6
SPEAKER_00
It was just, oh, so maddening all the time, what the rules are.
7
SPEAKER_01
You know, you got to go to live streaming and there s other rules now, though, because, you know, there s just a lot of sensitivity, put it that way.
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh, man.
7
SPEAKER_00
With Peacock, they re letting it be quite risqué.
7
SPEAKER_02
I was about to say, I saw your trailer and I m like, this looks like it s going to be pretty rough on the edges.
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, there s it s it is essentially they let us do whatever we wanted to do.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
7
SPEAKER_00
Very hard are.
7
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
7
SPEAKER_02
Is it because you pay for Peacock and they and so there s like a barrier there gone?
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I guess so.
7
SPEAKER_00
Like we could never do it for NBC.
7
SPEAKER_00
Right.
7
SPEAKER_00
But because it s their streaming service, I guess there s, you know, you can the fans of the movie are going to come over and the movie was are right.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, the movie s super R, and so it s basically the same tone as the movie.
7
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, Peacock s been awesome and really fun to work with.
7
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, none of that stuff
7
SPEAKER_00
you know, we re just very excited because it s kind of impossible to do this character after the movie without quite a bit of swearing and dirty scenarios.
7
SPEAKER_02
I like super R, that should be a new rating.
7
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, super R. I m going to go super R.
7
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_02
All right.
7
SPEAKER_02
Well, good luck with that one.
7
SPEAKER_02
That s going to be fucking cool.
7
SPEAKER_02
And any other questions or Dana, what do you got anything?
7
SPEAKER_01
You got any questions for us or anything?
7
SPEAKER_01
We never know how to wrap up.
7
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_02
We re just saying we did your we did you did a good hour.
7
SPEAKER_02
You re fucking entertaining and it s good to dig deep and no more shit.
7
SPEAKER_00
What s that?
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh, man.
7
SPEAKER_00
I guess my question is.
7
SPEAKER_00
So Dana, you re, you are, you come down here from time to time because I did, I did text with Kevin Nealon, uh, last week and said, Hey, we should go.
7
SPEAKER_00
We should, we haven t hiked in a long time.
7
SPEAKER_00
We should, we should do a hike.
7
SPEAKER_00
So if you guys would, I guess what I m asking is would you guys would like to get a hike on the books?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I just want to let you know my resting pulse is 39.
7
SPEAKER_01
Not a joke.
7
SPEAKER_01
I hike really hard because I was in track.
7
SPEAKER_01
Now, did you run in high school or you were a swimmer?
7
SPEAKER_00
I didn t.
7
SPEAKER_00
OK, I was I was a swimmer and I played football, but we didn t have a hike club or else I probably would have joined it.
7
SPEAKER_01
I was a distance runner, so I take that.
7
SPEAKER_01
But if I was doing it with you and Kevin, we would just stroll and talk.
7
SPEAKER_02
Kevin has to hold like waters and he holds like a camera in front of him, like a selfie stick, drone.
7
SPEAKER_02
He s barking at doors and he s like, so tell me.
7
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, Kevin, I can t even walk this fast.
7
SPEAKER_02
I asked him, I swear to God, can we do it in a parking lot?
7
SPEAKER_02
I go, it s just about
7
SPEAKER_02
the interview because my neck is all fucked up.
7
SPEAKER_02
I go, I don t want to go fucking Mount Everest and the Eiger Sanction.
7
SPEAKER_02
Let s just walk around Kmart.
7
SPEAKER_02
And he s like, no.
7
SPEAKER_02
And I go, what s the difference?
7
SPEAKER_02
Maybe tilt the camera.
7
SPEAKER_02
We think we re walking around.
7
SPEAKER_00
The last time he lured me up to this real poison oaky, like he said, there s a ton of poison oak.
7
SPEAKER_00
And that s the one thing that I m very allergic to poison oak.
7
SPEAKER_00
So I had to basically wear a full body.
7
SPEAKER_02
You don t have to make excuses.
7
SPEAKER_02
He s like, you want to go to Scorpion Junction?
7
SPEAKER_00
No, I go where Nealon tells me to go.
7
SPEAKER_02
Rattlesnake Hills?
7
SPEAKER_00
By the way, that was also, uh, now Dana, David and I got to go.
7
SPEAKER_00
I had run into Tim Meadows at, uh, we, we go to the same gym and I saw him and we got a little dinner together.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so David came, it was me and Hayter and Tim Meadows and David and Molly Shannon came and waited.
7
SPEAKER_00
What a game.
7
SPEAKER_00
That was a good little mix.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_01
it was kind of like this getting to talk about different eras of the show and just it was so much fun we should do another one of those too that s kind of why we re doing this podcast because you just it s gets ridiculous when you are fans of people and people from snl and friends that you don t see and you wait until maybe you re at some award show or the 50th this will even if i don t see you between now and the 50th i guess we re all going there then i ll go
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, you know, just because it s coming up, which is I mean, it s it s it s what it s got to be three or four years away.
7
SPEAKER_01
What are you going to wear?
7
SPEAKER_01
I mean, a full tuxedo or what are you guys thinking?
7
SPEAKER_01
Am I going to do Garth?
7
SPEAKER_01
Let s do it.
7
SPEAKER_01
They better bring Vaseline and cotton swabs on that.
7
SPEAKER_00
Did you say that?
7
SPEAKER_00
Did you say that Garth is is my brother, brother?
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, if we put him on the phone, he would talk like this.
7
SPEAKER_01
I used to do him in my standup act.
7
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I could make a nuclear weapon with the paper clip.
7
SPEAKER_01
That s why Garth had a stun gun and all that in Wayne s World 1.
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That was all from Brad advising me how would Garth make a homemade stun gun because he was kind of a MacGyver kid.
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Brad was.
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Oh, wow.
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That is awesome.
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He must be flattered by it.
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Oh, yeah.
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Does he like it?
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OK.
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He invented the first prototype of an at home video editing system called the Video Toaster with a man named Tim Jennison.
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So we were on magazine covers together when I was doing Garth.
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And yeah, it s very flattering because Garth, who wouldn t want to be Garth?
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That s a character that I would like to just be him or hang out with him.
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He s so loyal and fun.
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And he got some.
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Yeah.
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Yeah, he s just so nice.
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Disney s real supportive.
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He always has some pretty girl in the movie, like, really, Garth?
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And he s like, this isn t my Garth.
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I remember Kristen Wiig at the 40th, she goes, why does he hold his jaw like that?
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And I go, because Brad does, all his anxiety is right here.
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Is it stress or something?
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I guess, but it is a little painful.
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Because it makes it funnier?
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She should know, she s fucking hilarious.
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She s great.
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Well, she s the best of the best.
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She is.
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She s certainly in the conversation.
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There are certain people that are so good at Saturday Night Live.
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There s no there shouldn t be ratings, but it s fun.
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Oh, you re number three.
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I m number ten, you know, that are just as good as anyone s ever done it.
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And I would put Mr. Will Forte in that category unless someone else comes along and does does this.
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What I m looking at with my.
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Look at that shit.
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Look at that.
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Did you see the word old?
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I did all that.
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Yeah.
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All right.
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I can t see it anymore.
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Nice to meet you, Dana.
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And if you ever want to do a dinner with or without Dana, let me know.
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I would love that.
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I would love that.
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And I ll tell Kevin I would like to go for a hike with you guys or a dinner.
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Yeah.
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Okay, that s fantastic.
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I ll talk with him and we will get in touch with you and figure it out.
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I m here almost all the time.
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You hike and then I ll meet you guys for dinner.
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You guys, it is such an honor to do this with you.
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Thank you for wanting me to come on.
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You guys are freaking the best and I could ask you so many more questions and Will.
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At dinner.
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So I, this might lead you to say no to this hike and dinner, but, but, uh, no, it s just a thrill.
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I find everything to do with Saturday night live.
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Interesting, really weirdly enough, only because which I say many times, it s like experientially the height of what you could do on planet earth, unless you re a Navy seal or something.
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It s just this adrenal bizarre live weird show.
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So.
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Nothing like it, that s why.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Tracy Morgan, when I run into him, he goes, hey alum, how you doing alum?
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That s the way he looks at it.
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That s it.
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Part of the team.
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All right, well, go about your day, kiss your baby and your wife in what particular order, doesn t matter.
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Bye, alums.
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Have fun.
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Oh, he just left, okay.
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All right, we did it.
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This has been a podcast presentation of Cadence 13.
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Please listen, then rate, review, and follow all episodes.
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Available now for free wherever you get your podcasts.
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No joke, folks.
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Fly on the Wall has been a presentation of Cadence 13, executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Chris Corcoran of Cadence 13, and Charlie Finan of Brillstein Entertainment.
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The show s lead producer is Greg Holtzman, with production and engineering support from Serena Regan and Chris Basil of Cadence 13.