0
SPEAKER_00
My name is Lee Hawkins.
0
SPEAKER_00
I ve been a journalist for over 25 years.
0
SPEAKER_00
On my new podcast, What Happened in Alabama, I get answers to some of the hardest questions about how things came to be for many Black Americans and the truth that must come before any reconciliation can happen.
0
SPEAKER_00
I investigate my family history, my upbringing in Minnesota, and my father s painful nightmares about growing up in Alabama.
0
SPEAKER_00
What Happened in Alabama is a new series confronting the cycles of trauma for myself, my family, and for many Black Americans.
0
SPEAKER_00
Listen now.
0
SPEAKER_02
Friends, today is International Women s Day, a time where people all over the world observe and honor all that the women s rights movement has achieved and bring attention to all that still needs to be done for gender equality, reproductive rights, and the end of violence against women.
0
SPEAKER_02
When I think about celebrating women in my life, I was actually just talking.
0
SPEAKER_02
Gosh, I can t even remember who I was talking to, but it was in the past day or so.
0
SPEAKER_02
I ve mentioned this person in different conversations, interviews.
0
SPEAKER_02
I even wrote about her in the foreword of Richard Pryor s reissued autobiography.
0
SPEAKER_02
And it s my assistant principal from high school.
0
SPEAKER_02
I shudder to think of where I would be in this world today if I did not have the guidance and care and attention from her.
0
SPEAKER_02
I went through a lot of struggles as a kid
0
SPEAKER_02
a lot.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I know many people do, but I just happened to be so lucky to have this person.
0
SPEAKER_02
I mean, of course, we cross paths a lot because I was always getting in trouble.
0
SPEAKER_02
And so sitting in her office all the time, and typically, a principal or assistant principal might just
0
SPEAKER_02
you know, send you off to detention or however you re reprimanded or punished.
0
SPEAKER_02
I got hints of that.
0
SPEAKER_02
But I would say 95 percent of my time interacting with her was all encouragement, all love, all guidance.
0
SPEAKER_02
Even when I decided to drop out of school, she was ultimately behind me when I made that decision.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I m still in touch with her.
0
SPEAKER_02
Sometimes when I go through my life, I kind of will lose touch or forget how impactful that connection was.
0
SPEAKER_02
But then moments like this or the conversation I was having the other day, I m just brought back to, man, am I thankful for that woman.
0
SPEAKER_02
So thankful.
0
SPEAKER_02
So, happy International Women s Day, and let s start the show.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m stunned at how good we look.
0
SPEAKER_02
Is your camera on?
0
SPEAKER_03
Uh-huh.
0
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
0
SPEAKER_02
Do you not see me?
0
SPEAKER_02
No, I do.
0
SPEAKER_02
I just wasn t sure if you saw yourself.
0
SPEAKER_02
This is Don t Ask Tig.
0
SPEAKER_02
I m Tig Notaro, determined not to let bad advice get in the way of a good time.
0
SPEAKER_02
Today s guest is an actress, writer, and comedian who has been on shows like King of Queens, Two Broke Girls, and Will & Grace, as well as films like Yes Man and Big Fat Liar.
0
SPEAKER_02
She has a Comedy Central special and was a finalist on Last Comic Standing.
0
SPEAKER_02
She is the founder and executive director of the Stand Up for Pits Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to saving the lives of pit bull type dogs.
0
SPEAKER_02
Rebecca Corey, my old pal, welcome to Don t Ask Tig.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m so happy to be here.
0
SPEAKER_02
I am so happy to have you.
0
SPEAKER_02
Years ago, I did a podcast with you.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I remember afterwards, people wrote in and accused me of having a crush on you, because I was teasing you all the time.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I was like, that is so funny, because I totally get that.
0
SPEAKER_02
People do that when they re attracted to people, they ll like tease and whatever.
0
SPEAKER_02
But I was just thinking, that just hasn t come up in our friendship.
0
SPEAKER_02
Now you re, you know, look.
0
SPEAKER_02
Stunning.
0
SPEAKER_02
You re stunning.
0
SPEAKER_02
Not today, not what I m looking at on the Zoom link, but you are somebody that I enjoy teasing, I have to say.
0
SPEAKER_02
I enjoy teasing a lot of people, but man, do I love teasing you.
0
SPEAKER_03
I know you do.
0
SPEAKER_03
Honestly, I don t know why it makes me laugh so hard.
0
SPEAKER_03
I remember one time I bumped into you at Whole Foods on Thanksgiving about 15 years ago.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m sure you don t remember.
0
SPEAKER_02
I do, in the parking lot.
0
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_03
Then I think you were going in to get coffee.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m pretty sure the entire encounter was you just ripping on me.
0
SPEAKER_03
what I was wearing, what I was doing there, what am I getting?
0
SPEAKER_03
And it was the best Thanksgiving I ve ever had.
0
SPEAKER_02
I remember when we were at a mutual friend s house for like a movie night or something, you walked in and I said, oh no, did you just get evicted?
0
SPEAKER_02
And I said, why?
0
SPEAKER_02
And you just said, look at you.
0
SPEAKER_02
Meanwhile, I can t even imagine what I looked like.
0
SPEAKER_02
Half the time my hair is standing up to the heavens.
0
SPEAKER_02
But I adore you, Rebecca.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I have to say, as I mentioned in your intro, the stand up for pits work that you do.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you don t know this, but my wife and I,
0
SPEAKER_02
mention all the time how impressed and blown away we are at how devoted you are to saving the lives of these dogs.
0
SPEAKER_02
It comes up all the time.
0
SPEAKER_02
I m shot?
0
SPEAKER_02
Really?
0
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_02
I m just like, you don t take a day off or a second off in your life
0
SPEAKER_02
to save these animals.
0
SPEAKER_02
And there s posts on social media, there s shows that you do.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I m being very genuine when, of course, it s not every day, but I would say it s probably more often than you would think that we are both like, I cannot believe the energy that you put into it.
0
SPEAKER_02
And it s obvious, it s so important to you.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I just think it s tremendous work that you ve done.
0
SPEAKER_03
Well, thank you so much.
0
SPEAKER_03
It means a lot.
0
SPEAKER_03
I appreciate you saying that.
0
SPEAKER_03
It is an enormous amount of work and it really is every single day, 365 days a year.
0
SPEAKER_03
I hope that will be my legacy.
0
SPEAKER_02
Where s the beginning of this story?
0
SPEAKER_02
What drew you to these pit bull type dogs?
0
SPEAKER_03
Almost 16 years ago, I adopted a pit bull type dog and she had been really abused and they d cut her ears off.
0
SPEAKER_03
This is Angel, right?
0
SPEAKER_03
Angel, yeah.
0
SPEAKER_03
And she was like the opposite of me, just like really zen and loves people.
0
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that s not you.
0
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that s the opposite.
0
SPEAKER_03
And she just was like really amazing.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I learned people were afraid of her and they would say horrible things about them.
0
SPEAKER_03
And then I started educating myself about breed specific legislation and discrimination against dogs based on what they look like.
0
SPEAKER_03
how they re wrongly vilified and all of the myths about them not being true and to do nothing would not be an option.
0
SPEAKER_03
So I just started doing live events.
0
SPEAKER_03
You did the very first one actually in Hollywood.
0
SPEAKER_03
That was 14 years ago.
0
SPEAKER_03
Then I organized a march on Washington to raise awareness about the dog fighting epidemic and breed specific legislation.
0
SPEAKER_03
And then I did my foundation and I became a nonprofit.
0
SPEAKER_03
And now we ve saved literally like millions of dogs and helped change the way that society views them.
0
SPEAKER_02
And so what do you say to somebody that has a legitimate concern or, you know, I ve had
0
SPEAKER_02
a not-so-great run-in with a pit bull before.
0
SPEAKER_02
And I have to say, it s knowing you that I haven t gone down the road of, well, that s how they all are.
0
SPEAKER_02
Because I ve actually seen other dogs attack or bite.
0
SPEAKER_02
It s not just a pit bull that I ve seen, but I would have, if I didn t know you, probably just been like, oh, that s what pit bulls do.
0
SPEAKER_02
What would you say to that person?
0
SPEAKER_03
I would just say that you and me, we re born individuals.
0
SPEAKER_03
I have siblings that are not half as good looking as me, and it s not their fault.
0
SPEAKER_03
You know what I mean?
0
SPEAKER_03
It s the cards they were dealt.
0
SPEAKER_03
It doesn t mean that just because all these dogs come from one type of dog that they re all the same.
0
SPEAKER_03
they re all born inherently good.
0
SPEAKER_03
And a lot of the times when an incident happens, there s a lot more of story behind it.
0
SPEAKER_03
The dog has endured a lot of things that the media hasn t told the whole story or reported about what the dog has experienced to make that happen or what were the circumstances surrounding it.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m not saying every single dog is perfect.
0
SPEAKER_03
They re just all individuals and they deserve a chance and
0
SPEAKER_02
You can t discard an entire group of animals.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_02
I ve always just been curious about this with you in general.
0
SPEAKER_03
Do you also just love dogs more than any other living thing on earth?
0
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_03
I live very, very, very small life.
0
SPEAKER_03
I live in a very tiny house with two dogs and it s very this is not a dating profile.
0
SPEAKER_02
OK.
0
SPEAKER_03
I know, but I feel like after this, though, you got to admit things are going to change for me.
0
SPEAKER_02
Things are going to blow up.
0
SPEAKER_03
I figure.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I m happiest with them.
0
SPEAKER_03
They make me laugh so hard.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_03
They re great teachers and they don t even say a word.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_03
They re magical.
0
SPEAKER_03
I just love them so much.
0
SPEAKER_02
Now, what is your feeling on cats?
0
SPEAKER_03
I love all animals.
0
SPEAKER_03
but they scare me ever so slightly.
0
SPEAKER_03
They scare me because they re swirly and fast, right?
0
SPEAKER_03
They could crawl up your leg and slash your face if they wanted to, right?
0
SPEAKER_02
Listen, I m going to start a nonprofit to change the way you think.
0
SPEAKER_02
Our cats don t do that.
0
SPEAKER_02
They travel in a pack.
0
SPEAKER_02
It is the cutest thing.
0
SPEAKER_02
They re like dogs.
0
SPEAKER_02
We re like, it s time for bed.
0
SPEAKER_02
They all hop up off the couch and walk up in a troop to go put Max and Finn to bed.
0
SPEAKER_02
And they all sit in the room.
0
SPEAKER_02
I ll text you videos.
0
SPEAKER_02
They re all lounging around the bed at story time, and then we leave their bedroom, then we go into our room, all three cats follow us in the room, hang out in the bathroom while we re brushing teeth.
0
SPEAKER_02
There s nothing to be scared of.
0
SPEAKER_03
Really?
0
SPEAKER_03
Well, I mean, I do peruse TikTok every now and again, in between my dating schedule.
0
SPEAKER_02
Sure.
0
SPEAKER_03
I see cats, you know, on there.
0
SPEAKER_02
Well, you d have to.
0
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_03
And the ones that I see are really funny on TikTok.
0
SPEAKER_03
Like, they do bits beyond bits.
0
SPEAKER_03
They can hang from stuff and teeter on stuff and they smack each other.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I do think it s really funny.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m deathly ill, which I think is a blessing because I would probably have 700 cats, too.
0
SPEAKER_02
You re deathly ill?
0
SPEAKER_03
I mean, deathly allergic.
0
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I was like, wait a minute.
0
SPEAKER_02
This took a very sad turn.
0
SPEAKER_02
I m definitely ill and I have a week to live.
0
SPEAKER_02
Can I just say something?
0
SPEAKER_02
I said definitely ill and you responded so calm.
0
SPEAKER_02
I am a calm person.
0
SPEAKER_02
I was trying to process what you were telling me.
0
SPEAKER_02
I thought, is she exaggerating here?
0
SPEAKER_02
I feel like I know you well enough to where if you are deathly ill, we can go into it, even though this is the first I m hearing of this.
0
SPEAKER_03
No, I m not deadly ill.
0
SPEAKER_03
I meant that I was deathly allergic.
0
SPEAKER_03
And it s a blessing because I would probably have a bunch of them because they are very funny.
0
SPEAKER_03
I would say they re almost as funny as pit bulls.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I can t imagine what three are like together.
0
SPEAKER_03
I bet they re hilarious.
0
SPEAKER_02
I am going to send you videos after we record this.
0
SPEAKER_02
Now, Rebecca, it s been brought to my attention that you re currently directing and producing your first documentary.
0
SPEAKER_02
What can you tell us about that project?
0
SPEAKER_03
That is true.
0
SPEAKER_03
It s called Saving Jones.
0
SPEAKER_03
It s been in the works for many years, but now it s finally actually in the editing phase, and we re hoping to have it finished by the end of this year.
0
SPEAKER_03
And a director named Amy Ziering is executive producing it with me, and
0
SPEAKER_03
is sort of been my mentor through the process.
0
SPEAKER_03
And it s about the cause.
0
SPEAKER_03
It s about abuse and discrimination and how it s not just exclusive to animals.
0
SPEAKER_03
It s very much a social issue as well as an animal issue.
0
SPEAKER_03
We re going to learn about that and explore that.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I m going to, for the very, very first time in my life,
0
SPEAKER_03
We re just going to do a personal look at my life and go back to my hometown and stuff like that.
0
SPEAKER_03
It s going to be intense and funny and great and heartwarming and inspiring and all that stuff.
0
SPEAKER_02
Love it.
0
SPEAKER_02
You certainly were one of the early people speaking out during, which is now known as the Me Too movement, having dealt with, I always feel like it s not enough to call it misconduct, or what would you say you experienced?
0
SPEAKER_03
I would just say it s more sexual harassment.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it s interesting because even sexual harassment, when I think about that term, it still feels like what some people have done to others is assault because people will say, well, it s not assault because I didn t touch you.
0
SPEAKER_02
But then my argument is you can be verbally assaulted.
0
SPEAKER_02
People comfortably use that term, verbal assault, and you re not physically handled.
0
SPEAKER_02
But people will accept the word assault in that way.
0
SPEAKER_02
To me, I feel like it is assault, whether somebody s touching somebody or saying something inappropriate or exposing themselves.
0
SPEAKER_02
It s assault.
0
SPEAKER_02
And so I just wanted to to share my feeling about how things are classified and labeled.
0
SPEAKER_03
No, I mean, I absolutely agree with you.
0
SPEAKER_03
And in my circumstance, I was really fortunate enough to have the support of Courtney and David and Courtney Cox and David Arquette.
0
SPEAKER_03
and the support of friends and the staff that was there and all that.
0
SPEAKER_03
But I don t think that the Me Too movement was successful.
0
SPEAKER_03
I don t think that anything has changed at all.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I think that I was a perfect example of what you get when you do tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_03
And that is just a battering for like two years straight after that, just battered by the public and no support from the comedy community.
0
SPEAKER_03
you know, everyone just wants to shove you even further away and distance themselves from you.
0
SPEAKER_03
The entertainment industry, this goes for women.
0
SPEAKER_03
I got more support from male comedians than I did from women, shockingly.
0
SPEAKER_03
But I don t necessarily blame anyone or hold resentment.
0
SPEAKER_03
I just sort of think it s just really telling about what we re programmed to do.
0
SPEAKER_03
Maybe one day, like your son s generation or the next generation, it will be a different thing.
0
SPEAKER_03
But for now, it s absolutely not.
0
SPEAKER_03
But I wouldn t change a thing.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m glad I did what I did and said what I said.
0
SPEAKER_03
You do suffer consequences for it big time when you do.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_02
What is the positive that you see from that time period of speaking out about what you went through from that when you say you wouldn t change anything?
0
SPEAKER_03
Well, I m an abuse survivor through my childhood.
0
SPEAKER_03
So when you are an abuse survivor, you tend to kind of stay in a victim mentality.
0
SPEAKER_03
You have to work at getting out of that.
0
SPEAKER_03
For me, just not only that experience, but any experience in life, standing up for myself and saying, you know, I m not going to shut up and I m not going to take it.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I know that it s going to be detrimental and I know that it s not going to be popular and I know I m going to suffer consequences for it.
0
SPEAKER_03
But I don t care.
0
SPEAKER_03
That s the positive that came out of it for me.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I only did it for me anyways.
0
SPEAKER_03
So everything else is, that s up to everyone else.
0
SPEAKER_03
But yeah, I can only do what I can do.
0
SPEAKER_03
And that is why I would not change it.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I gladly accept and have accepted the consequences of telling the truth.
0
SPEAKER_02
Well, it s interesting to use the phrase telling the truth because there are so many different people in the industry of entertainment and the world and comedians that are like, yeah, I tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_02
That s my thing is I tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_02
And then if you or somebody that is assaulted,
0
SPEAKER_02
or harass, whatever you want to call it, tells the truth.
0
SPEAKER_02
That s not a truth that s cool to tell.
0
SPEAKER_02
But they can tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_02
They re the truth tellers.
0
SPEAKER_02
But don t you dare tell the truth about the truth tellers.
0
SPEAKER_03
That s it, right there in a nutshell, that s it.
0
SPEAKER_03
And, you know, like, when you get death threats for two years and you get your hack and your this and your, you know, and that s not just from the public.
0
SPEAKER_03
That s actually from other comics.
0
SPEAKER_03
Like, what a loser.
0
SPEAKER_03
You know, the list goes on and on and on.
0
SPEAKER_03
And I remember texting you one time, a photo I got, and you were like, oh, my God.
0
SPEAKER_03
You know, it was shocking and horrifying, but I do have to say that is a frustrating thing.
0
SPEAKER_03
what you mentioned, all of the tough talking.
0
SPEAKER_03
I stand on stage and tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m a comic.
0
SPEAKER_03
I tell the truth.
0
SPEAKER_03
I m a comic.
0
SPEAKER_03
No, you re not.
0
SPEAKER_03
You re a lemming.
0
SPEAKER_03
You re scared.
0
SPEAKER_03
And God bless you.
1
SPEAKER_03
You know, you got to pay your bills, you got to put food on your table.
1
SPEAKER_03
I m not going to fault you for that, but it s not okay to say that what I said was
1
SPEAKER_03
It was wrong or a lie or whatever, especially when it was confirmed by the person themselves that they did it.
1
SPEAKER_03
I lost friends through that thing because it s so complicated.
1
SPEAKER_03
It was really, really awful and disappointing.
1
SPEAKER_03
But at the same time, it was like I stood up for myself and I will always stand up for myself.
1
SPEAKER_03
It s pretty bananas, but it is what it is.
1
SPEAKER_03
Anyone does it to me again, I ll do the same thing.
1
SPEAKER_02
Great.
1
SPEAKER_02
I, you know, I feel the same way you do.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, but you were amazing through that.
1
SPEAKER_03
And I, you know, I so appreciate it.
1
SPEAKER_03
And Stephanie too.
1
SPEAKER_03
I remember a couple of times I ve shut my Twitter off.
1
SPEAKER_03
I m not on Twitter anymore.
1
SPEAKER_02
She got off Twitter too.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
She was a tremendous and amazing.
1
SPEAKER_03
And, and like I said, there were some really incredible people that were showed a lot of support.
1
SPEAKER_03
You were one of them.
1
SPEAKER_03
So thank you.
1
SPEAKER_02
Well, thank you.
1
SPEAKER_02
And, yeah, Stephanie, man, I was like, you barely know Rebecca and she s like ready to throw her life on the line for you.
1
SPEAKER_02
She s not messing around.
1
SPEAKER_02
She s like, I got to get off of this.
1
SPEAKER_02
I got to get off of Twitter.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, my God.
1
SPEAKER_03
It s a healthy thing to do.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
1
SPEAKER_02
Now, Rebecca, you are, as we ve mentioned already, you re a person who loves to help.
1
SPEAKER_02
So I m now going to ask you to help my listeners.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
All right.
1
SPEAKER_02
Our first question is right in your wheelhouse, which happens to be the dog house.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
Jeannie writes, I need advice about my neighbor s dog.
1
SPEAKER_02
My neighbors are the cutest and greatest family in the world.
1
SPEAKER_02
However, their little yappy dog drives me crazy.
1
SPEAKER_02
She stands on the property line and barks towards us when we re outside trying to enjoy the lovely weather or nature.
1
SPEAKER_02
I have two older dogs and I often can only walk them around my yard for exercise because they have disabilities.
1
SPEAKER_02
I have considered buying a device that emits high-pitched sounds that would repel dogs within a certain range, but I don t really know if that s a humane solution.
1
SPEAKER_02
I want my dogs to have some peace and quiet walking around their yard as they continue to age.
1
SPEAKER_02
Rebecca, what does Jeannie do?
1
SPEAKER_03
Okay, wait, so I m kind of confused.
1
SPEAKER_03
Who put the sound thing up?
1
SPEAKER_02
Who put the fence up?
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, my apologies.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, so the neighbors have a yappy dog that stands on the property line while they re out enjoying nature with their elderly dogs that have disabilities.
1
SPEAKER_02
and they ve considered buying a device that emits high-pitched sounds that would repel dogs within a certain range.
1
SPEAKER_02
So it s not a fence, it s should she get this device that repels dogs, that has a high-pitched sound, or is that inhumane?
1
SPEAKER_03
Does she put that on her dogs, or does she carry it and like aim it at another dog or something?
1
SPEAKER_02
I ve never heard... Rebecca, I don t have any more information than I ve told you.
1
SPEAKER_02
I don t even...
1
SPEAKER_02
I don t know where she lives.
1
SPEAKER_02
I don t know the dog s name.
1
SPEAKER_03
Here s the thing.
1
SPEAKER_03
I feel like I do actually have the answer to this.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, well, then let s get to it.
1
SPEAKER_03
No, because look, yes, I understand that her dogs are elderly.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yes, they have disabilities.
1
SPEAKER_03
And I kind of I m not I don t want to, like, pick a fight with this person.
1
SPEAKER_02
But I mean, Jeannie, Jeannie, when Rebecca says she doesn t want to pick a fight with this person, oh,
1
SPEAKER_03
I feel like she threw in the disability thing as a way to soften the fact that she wants to use.
1
SPEAKER_02
She wants to zap a yappy dog.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe it doesn t have an electrical shock.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe it s not a gun of sorts.
1
SPEAKER_03
However, why should that dog be limited to living its best life?
1
SPEAKER_03
And maybe that dog has things to say.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe her dogs are giving that dog the stink eye as they walk by.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe there s a status thing.
1
SPEAKER_03
We don t know what s going on between them.
1
SPEAKER_02
We really don t.
1
SPEAKER_02
And these dogs sound like they maybe do have a lot to say.
1
SPEAKER_02
Maybe they should start a podcast, right?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they should start a podcast.
1
SPEAKER_02
You could co-host it.
1
SPEAKER_02
I would co-host.
1
SPEAKER_02
Now, I can see how it would be annoying.
1
SPEAKER_02
But also when you think of somebody dealing with a yappy dog next door, it s also kind of funny because that dog doesn t know what it s up to.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s just being a dog.
1
SPEAKER_02
That s what I m saying.
1
SPEAKER_03
So wait, do you think that it s okay for her to do that?
1
SPEAKER_02
I know it s called Don t Ask Tig.
1
SPEAKER_02
Right.
1
SPEAKER_02
I don t think I would be comfortable.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, so the dog isn t getting zapped.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s a high-pitched noise.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, but think about when your smoke alarm goes off.
1
SPEAKER_03
Do you go, oh, that s awesome?
1
SPEAKER_02
Well, our alarm to our house went off this morning because Finn walked out the door to play basketball at six in the morning before the sun even came up.
1
SPEAKER_02
And he was like, Mom, the alarm s going off.
1
SPEAKER_02
And we re like, yeah, we can hear it.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s not fun.
1
SPEAKER_02
That was this morning.
1
SPEAKER_02
Stephanie was like scrambling around on her bedside table, trying to find the thing to turn the alarm off.
1
SPEAKER_02
And she was like, I know.
1
SPEAKER_02
I hear it and he s just down there at the door like mom the alarms.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m trying to go play basketball Wake up, he plays basketball and football and baseball and soccer Swim team.
1
SPEAKER_02
They re so athletic.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
We can talk about this later.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, Jeannie I feel like I don t know if Jeannie has a car.
1
SPEAKER_03
Why doesn t Jeannie walk the other way?
1
SPEAKER_03
How about just walking the other side?
1
SPEAKER_03
I know disabilities and seniors.
1
SPEAKER_03
I get it, Jeannie.
1
SPEAKER_03
But why do you have to walk by the dog that you know is going to bark?
1
SPEAKER_03
And can they not put up a fence?
1
SPEAKER_03
They can t.
1
SPEAKER_03
It s not going to stop the dog from barking.
1
SPEAKER_03
But at the same time, it s like, no, I m a hard no on this.
1
SPEAKER_03
OK.
1
SPEAKER_03
And if she wants to come for me, she can.
1
SPEAKER_02
All right, Jeannie, take it from Rebecca.
1
SPEAKER_02
She knows what she s talking about.
1
SPEAKER_02
You don t want to start anything with Rebecca Corey.
1
SPEAKER_02
Rebecca, it s time for us to take a little break, but stay put and we ll be right back with more questions.
1
SPEAKER_02
And we are back.
1
SPEAKER_02
Rebecca, this is relevant to our next question.
1
SPEAKER_02
Are you a competitive person?
1
SPEAKER_03
I am absolutely competitive.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I m a very competitive person.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, well, here s the question.
1
SPEAKER_02
Victoria writes, I absolutely love my partner s family, but they tend to get competitive playing what should be fun family games.
1
SPEAKER_02
At the last gathering, things got heated.
1
SPEAKER_02
People were accused of cheating, there were hurt feelings, et cetera.
1
SPEAKER_02
At the next party, I plan to buy a gift for one person to receive at the end of the party for good sportspersonship.
1
SPEAKER_02
They are all such loving family members when they re not competing against each other.
1
SPEAKER_02
What would be an appropriate reward that is gender neutral in the $25 to $50 range and that both teens and adults would like?
1
SPEAKER_02
Victoria, it s cash.
1
SPEAKER_02
What are we even talking about?
1
SPEAKER_02
Nobody wants a bobblehead or... Yeah, I say cash is a great idea.
1
SPEAKER_02
Cash and cash.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, Victoria, come on.
1
SPEAKER_03
I don t think there s anything wrong with getting that competitive where you hurt people s feelings.
1
SPEAKER_03
I mean, the gloves come off.
1
SPEAKER_03
There s got to be a winner.
1
SPEAKER_03
There s got to be a loser.
1
SPEAKER_03
And there s nothing wrong with that.
1
SPEAKER_02
Rebecca s she s feisty.
1
SPEAKER_02
She didn t care.
1
SPEAKER_02
Your feelings are hurt.
1
SPEAKER_02
You re crying, whatever.
1
SPEAKER_02
We re having a party.
1
SPEAKER_02
And some people are gonna leave here.
1
SPEAKER_02
Very upset.
1
SPEAKER_03
We re having a party.
1
SPEAKER_03
And if you obtain a low back injury, bruise your coccyx during a play, you re not paying attention.
1
SPEAKER_03
That s how it goes.
1
SPEAKER_02
This is not our problem, Victoria.
1
SPEAKER_02
OK.
1
SPEAKER_02
All right.
1
SPEAKER_02
Well, we say cash.
1
SPEAKER_02
OK, cash.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I ll agree with that.
1
SPEAKER_02
All right, Rebecca, this next one is from Shannon.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
Shannon writes, Hi Tig, I dated a man for two years.
1
SPEAKER_02
He was great and wonderful, but just wasn t the right fit for a life of marriage together.
1
SPEAKER_02
The last time we spent my birthday together, his mom made me a quilt and matching quilted pillows of my llama.
1
SPEAKER_02
I had my llama for 17 wonderful years, and he was the greatest pet ever and passed away in 2019.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m now in a relationship I see turning into a marriage, and I don t know what to do with the sentimental gift from an ex s mom.
1
SPEAKER_02
Do I keep it?
1
SPEAKER_02
It has my llama s name quilted on it, so it s not like I can gift it to any other llama friend.
1
SPEAKER_02
What do I do with this special gift?
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh my gosh, Shannon, I wish I could meet you in person.
1
SPEAKER_02
I cannot picture who you are at all.
1
SPEAKER_02
Can you, Rebecca?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yes, I totally picture her.
1
SPEAKER_02
What does Shannon look like?
1
SPEAKER_03
My height, four foot eleven.
1
SPEAKER_03
She s absolutely four foot eleven.
1
SPEAKER_03
I m a little bit more on the grossly developed side.
1
SPEAKER_03
I would say that she s probably got a really nice head of hair.
1
SPEAKER_02
Does she have hooves?
1
SPEAKER_03
Nope.
1
SPEAKER_03
Strong arms, though.
1
SPEAKER_03
To control a llama, I would imagine you have to have good forearms.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
Fair skin, sweet face, rosy cheeks, good teeth, glasses, baby cardigans.
1
SPEAKER_02
Okay, Shannon, Rebecca is describing herself.
1
SPEAKER_02
If Angel was on something, you wouldn t get rid of that.
1
SPEAKER_03
No, I know your viewers can t see it, but my entire arm is angel.
1
SPEAKER_03
Tattoos of my whole arm of angel.
1
SPEAKER_03
So I would never get rid of it.
1
SPEAKER_03
And if the new husband or fiance has an issue because it s from an ex-boyfriend s mother, he s going to have to seriously seek therapy to talk it through.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I feel like that s something that is just such a nice gift from your past that why would you have to get rid of it?
1
SPEAKER_03
Well, that s the other question I was going to ask.
1
SPEAKER_03
Why is she feeling like she needs to get rid of it?
1
SPEAKER_03
Does she still have feelings for the axe?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I can t imagine Stephanie being like, your llama quilt needs to go if we re getting married.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, she might not be excited about it being on our bed,
1
SPEAKER_02
but it doesn t feel like a deal breaker.
1
SPEAKER_02
It shouldn t be a deal breaker.
1
SPEAKER_03
Exactly.
1
SPEAKER_03
And just the words, your llama quilt, I feel like that s a red flag for things to come.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
It needs to stay.
1
SPEAKER_02
If the llama quilt has to go, what s next?
1
SPEAKER_02
Exactly, Shannon.
1
SPEAKER_02
OK, I never thought my career would lead to me answering questions about llama quilts, but here we are.
1
SPEAKER_02
OK, Rebecca, before I let you go, we have one final segment.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s called Advice of Yesteryear.
1
SPEAKER_01
When Jerry brags about taking Jenny out, he learns that she dates all the boys.
1
SPEAKER_00
So as we see now, menstruation is just one routine step.
1
SPEAKER_00
in a normal and natural cycle.
1
SPEAKER_01
How do you choose a date?
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, one thing you can consider is look.
1
SPEAKER_01
I did everything you said, but my boss still hasn t asked me to lunch.
1
SPEAKER_02
This is where we take a real question from an advice column of yesteryear and try to answer it a little better.
1
SPEAKER_02
This is from Dorothy Dix s column written in 1925.
1
SPEAKER_02
Schoolgirl writes, Dear Miss Dix, I am a girl of 13 and want to know if it is right for me to use rouge.
1
SPEAKER_02
Signed, Schoolgirl.
1
SPEAKER_02
Is that the end?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, that s the question that came in.
1
SPEAKER_02
Have you heard anybody in recent years say rouge?
1
SPEAKER_02
I ve not heard that, no.
1
SPEAKER_02
What is rouge?
1
SPEAKER_02
You ve never heard rouge?
1
SPEAKER_03
I have, but is it a cream or is it a blush?
1
SPEAKER_02
It s blush.
1
SPEAKER_02
Somehow grandmothers from yesteryear used the word rouge.
1
SPEAKER_02
I wonder when it became blush.
1
SPEAKER_03
That s what I m saying.
1
SPEAKER_03
I think, isn t that the, you put your fingers in it and you do the... Do you think I know?
1
SPEAKER_03
Okay, you do not know.
1
SPEAKER_03
I would just say, okay, it doesn t matter.
1
SPEAKER_02
Whatever it s made out of, nobody says I m going to need some rouge.
1
SPEAKER_02
But now if I film something again in the television or movie industry, I m going to ask that they apply rouge to my face.
1
SPEAKER_02
Do you think she should have worn it?
1
SPEAKER_02
A girl the age of 13?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, I m not a big makeup person.
1
SPEAKER_02
You re kidding.
1
SPEAKER_02
Well, even on other people, I tend to like very, very natural looking.
1
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
1
SPEAKER_02
What do you feel?
1
SPEAKER_03
I feel like, yeah, what would that hurt?
1
SPEAKER_03
She s 13.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, she wants to put some rouge on.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I don t have a problem.
1
SPEAKER_02
You know, I feel like you raise your kids, you let them do what they want to do for the most part if they re not going to get hurt or hurt anybody else.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m just saying I m not a rouge person, but if my kid wanted to wear some, even if one of my sons wanted to.
1
SPEAKER_02
In fact, Stephanie just took Max and Finn down to the makeup store because one of them wanted to buy avocado face cream that their Nana brings when she comes to visit.
1
SPEAKER_02
So he wanted one for himself.
1
SPEAKER_02
To put on his nose and cheeks before he goes to bed really.
1
SPEAKER_03
I think it s fine 13 double the age of that in that you know she doesn t have any ulterior motives just wants to have rosy cheeks.
1
SPEAKER_02
Do you want to hear what Dorothy had to say?
1
SPEAKER_03
I do.
1
SPEAKER_02
It is no crime to use rouge when you are 13, but it is frightfully bad taste.
1
SPEAKER_02
A little girl of 13 painted up like a middle-aged Jezebel is a sight to make the angels weep.
1
SPEAKER_02
When you are 13, you have the most wonderful thing in the world, my child.
1
SPEAKER_02
You have the thing that every woman past 30 envies you so much that she would almost give her eyes to get it, and that is youth.
1
SPEAKER_02
When older women paint and powder, they are just trying to simulate what you have naturally.
1
SPEAKER_02
A smooth white skin with roses on your cheeks.
1
SPEAKER_02
Don t use cosmetics when you re 13.
1
SPEAKER_02
Wait until you re old and need them.
1
SPEAKER_02
Now, speaking of old, Stephanie and I went to our son s open house at their school yesterday to see what their classrooms will be next year, and we were sitting with their friends, and Stephanie was in Max s class, and I was in Finn s class, and then we were gonna swap, but while I was sitting with Finn and his best friend, his best friend said,
1
SPEAKER_02
Are you older than Stephanie?
1
SPEAKER_02
And I said, I am, because I, you know, I m 15 years older.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I said, Why do you ask?
1
SPEAKER_02
And he said, Well, just because I can tell.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I said, How can you tell?
1
SPEAKER_02
And he s sitting, and he points at my face with his whole hand and kind of went in a circle, just any said, just because
1
SPEAKER_02
Just because your face looks really old.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I said, yeah, I said, I m 15 years older.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m glad that thank you for noticing that.
1
SPEAKER_02
And he was like, yeah, like no clue that he said something that some people could find a fence in his mom s thing.
1
SPEAKER_02
His parents weren t there because they, his house is like an hour away from the school.
1
SPEAKER_02
And so they were at work, but I was sitting with him just kind of trying to be parent-like since his parents weren t there and sit with the two best friends.
1
SPEAKER_02
And what I got in return was, um, your face looks really old.
1
SPEAKER_02
But that s also like taking Max to the ER one time when we checked in the woman behind the the desk I said, I m here with Max Notaro and she said, okay.
1
SPEAKER_02
Are you the grandmother?
1
SPEAKER_02
No, but thank you for even getting my gender right I
1
SPEAKER_03
Did you say that?
1
SPEAKER_03
Thank you for even getting my gender.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, that was the upside.
1
SPEAKER_03
Recognize I was female, but you are taking it to the chin, but you are you are doing it like a trooper.
1
SPEAKER_03
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_02
And then it all comes out on you in the Whole Foods parking lot on Thanksgiving morning.
1
SPEAKER_03
Oh, I see.
1
SPEAKER_03
That s how it happens.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that makes sense.
1
SPEAKER_03
But I do just say, um, hurt people hurt people.
1
SPEAKER_03
And that makes a lot of sense.
1
SPEAKER_03
Now.
1
SPEAKER_03
I get why you do what you do.
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
And what were you saying?
1
SPEAKER_03
Are we gonna address this horribly broken person who shamed this poor young girl?
1
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, please address.
1
SPEAKER_03
She needs to pull it together.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_03
I mean, calling her a Jezebel, she just wants to have a little face color.
1
SPEAKER_03
Maybe she s just feeling under the weather.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m sorry, but she didn t just say Jezebel.
1
SPEAKER_02
She said, a little girl of 13 painted up like a middle-aged Jezebel is a sight to make the angels weep.
1
SPEAKER_03
Do you have her Instagram handle?
1
SPEAKER_03
Is it possible, even generations later, she has a child that s out there, a descendant who s being just awful?
1
SPEAKER_03
I ll take her up right in the public eye.
1
SPEAKER_02
I know you will.
1
SPEAKER_02
I know, you ve done it before.
1
SPEAKER_02
This is from 1925, and I had some guests come on that speculated that maybe Dorothy Dix was a man.
1
SPEAKER_02
Really?
1
SPEAKER_02
Kristen Bell suggested that.
1
SPEAKER_03
Wait, so you have more than one question or something from her?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, every now and then I ll have an advice of yesteryear on
2
SPEAKER_03
in an episode and I guess the last one came up when Kristen was on and she was like, I think this is a man.
2
SPEAKER_03
She could be absolutely right.
2
SPEAKER_03
I thought that was a good point.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_03
Rebecca, it has been an absolute pleasure as it always is to see you and talk to you and laugh with you and make fun of each other and mainly me making fun of you.
2
SPEAKER_03
But I do appreciate you taking the time.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you so much for having me.
2
SPEAKER_02
You re one of my favorite people on this planet, always have been.
2
SPEAKER_02
I m pretty sure this is gonna be the most popular one you do and put out.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I will let you know how many gentlemen callers I get from it.
2
SPEAKER_03
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_03
Well, I think that there were many places in this episode that you made it clear that you are swinging single ready to go.
2
SPEAKER_03
Is there anything you d like to promote?
2
SPEAKER_02
Um, uh, the next stand up for pits event is going to be at the Gotham comedy club in New York on June 4th.
2
SPEAKER_02
And, um, I m doing a few more the rest of the year.
2
SPEAKER_02
They can go to stand up for pits.us to check out where else we re doing it.
2
SPEAKER_02
And then, um,
2
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, when the movie Saving Jones comes out, watch it.
2
SPEAKER_03
Great.
2
SPEAKER_03
And please do check out all the incredible work that Rebecca does for these dogs.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I mean, it s truly tireless, just endless work that she does.
2
SPEAKER_03
And it s incredible.
2
SPEAKER_03
It really is.
2
SPEAKER_03
It s so inspiring.
2
SPEAKER_03
And you put together the greatest lineup of comedians.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I just can t encourage people enough to check out what you re doing.
2
SPEAKER_03
And also,
2
SPEAKER_03
Rebecca is one of the most ridiculous people on this planet.
2
SPEAKER_03
And it s what I love about comedy and comedians is the nonsense and ridiculousness.
2
SPEAKER_03
And that is all that you do with your comedy.
2
SPEAKER_03
So please check that out as well.
2
SPEAKER_03
And thank you again for being on the show.
2
SPEAKER_02
Thank you so much.
2
SPEAKER_02
So fun.
2
SPEAKER_02
I love you.
2
SPEAKER_02
And I you I bye bye.
2
SPEAKER_03
Don t Ask Tig is hosted by me, Tig Notaro.
2
SPEAKER_03
It s produced by Thomas Ouellette and Shana Deloria.
2
SPEAKER_03
Our executive producer and editor is Beth Perlman.
2
SPEAKER_03
Engineering and sound mixing by Alex Simpson and Derek Ramirez.
2
SPEAKER_03
Digital production by James Napoli.
2
SPEAKER_03
Talent booking by Marianne Ways.
2
SPEAKER_03
Our theme music is Friend in Tig by Edie Burkell and Kyle Crusham.
2
SPEAKER_03
And Listen to Your Heart by Edie Burkell.
2
SPEAKER_03
Special thanks to Hunter Seidman.
2
SPEAKER_03
APM Studios executives in charge are Chandra Cavati, Alex Schaffert, and Joanne Griffith.
2
SPEAKER_03
Concept developed by Tracy Mumford.
2
SPEAKER_03
Our executive consultant is Dean Capello and Gobsmack Studios.
2
SPEAKER_03
You can always ask for advice at DontAskTig.org.
2
SPEAKER_03
Just write in with your problem or send us a voice memo.
2
SPEAKER_03
Remember to follow us on social media at DontAskTig.
2
SPEAKER_03
DontAskTig is a production of American Public Media.
2
SPEAKER_03
And as always, thanks Dana, and I ll tell Becky.
2
SPEAKER_03
Hi, I m stand-up comedian and sex symbol Tig Notaro.
2
SPEAKER_03
And I m actor and writer Cheryl Hines.
2
SPEAKER_03
Before Cheryl and I got into the big business of podcasting together, we were just simply friends.
2
SPEAKER_00
And we re still friends.
2
SPEAKER_00
But now we talk about a different documentary every week on our podcast, Tig and Cheryl, True Story.
2
SPEAKER_00
So whether you love documentaries or just want to hear us slowly lose our minds, check out Tig and Cheryl, True Story, wherever you get your podcasts.
2
SPEAKER_03
Alright, cool.