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SPEAKER_01
Hi.
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SPEAKER_01
Hi.
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SPEAKER_01
How are you doing?
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SPEAKER_01
I m great.
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SPEAKER_01
How are you?
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SPEAKER_01
I m good.
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During last week s episode, I meant to text you to remind you.
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We said that we would talk about some of our favorite beauty products.
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SPEAKER_00
I remembered.
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SPEAKER_00
You did?
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SPEAKER_00
I did.
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SPEAKER_00
I did.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
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Good job.
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SPEAKER_00
I listen, you know?
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SPEAKER_01
You do.
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SPEAKER_01
You re a good listener.
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SPEAKER_00
I m one of the hosts, but I m also a big listener of the show.
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SPEAKER_00
You re in the same squad also?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I am.
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SPEAKER_00
You double up.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, half of the questions are mine.
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My life s a mess.
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SPEAKER_00
No, that s not true.
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SPEAKER_00
No, your life s great.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know.
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Things are good.
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SPEAKER_00
You know, me and you already hung out this week.
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We did.
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Sometimes that s a problem.
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I know.
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I did leave brunch and I was like, that could have been a really good episode.
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SPEAKER_00
Of course.
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That s the whole reason we do this show is because we decided to bring our brunches and our dinners to air.
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To you, exactly.
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So I do want to re-talk about one of the things we talked about because I think I ve been thinking about it since we spoke about it.
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It s an important question and it makes you have more gratitude for the products that are in your life.
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The products?
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Oh, now you re back on.
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What are we talking about?
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Okay, oh boy.
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No?
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no.
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Let s do beauty products first.
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But wait, what was the other thing?
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Because I want to talk about something we talked about at brunch.
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Let s do beauty products first.
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I m very curious about what yours are.
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Okay.
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I remembered, but I also, I am having a really hard time narrowing.
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That s right.
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Because it s makeup and skincare, or?
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That s what I didn t know.
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Because we didn t make rules.
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We didn t.
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I have a mix, but it s mostly skincare.
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Because I feel that that is the priority in your 30s.
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Why don t you go first?
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Oh my god.
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Why don t we go back and forth?
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Yeah, let s go back and forth.
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I m gonna go with newest to oldest.
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So like a new thing that I ve been obsessed with is the Benefit lip stain.
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So I ve been seeing a lot of lip stain products on my feeds and they look very scary.
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I don t know if you ve seen it.
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It s like a black tattoo on your lip and then people peel it off.
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So I didn t have the bravery to do that.
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And it seems laborious.
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I will not do that.
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It takes the waiting.
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Like I just need to leave.
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Like by the time I m putting on something on my lips, I have like 30 seconds to get out of the house.
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So the benefit lipstain I got as a little gift and I was like, oh, okay, I ll try this out.
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If you eat a lot throughout the day, if your lips are often, it s spreading around, it s both a lipstain and a little cheek thing.
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I never tried it on my cheeks.
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Why?
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Why does that sound so... Gross?
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Why does cheeks like automatically in the butt?
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Oh, you think butt?
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Yeah.
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Oh, I did not.
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I was... Oh my God.
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I don t know why.
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Usually my... Other people s brains are... I don t know what s going on today.
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Probably getting my period.
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Cheeks?
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I don t think that ever.
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I mean, like if you said whole, then yes, I m going butt, but no.
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Wow, that s great.
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Okay, that s great.
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Maybe because I saw all that butt stuff at Luna Luna.
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Oh, yeah.
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You had some butt exposure.
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I went to Luna Luna, and there was just a lot of butt-focused art, which I enjoyed, obviously.
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And then I took a video for Monica, but then I felt like it might offend her, so I showed her in person.
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Anyway, so to go back to the lipstain.
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So it like stays on, it doesn t spread around, and it s not overpowering.
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Like it s not... That s nice.
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Because I just... Lipstick just ends up, I don t know, going places.
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And this is just like a subtle rose touch situation for your lips.
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Pretty.
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So it s like a very natural... Are you wearing it now?
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I am.
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Yeah, it s very pretty.
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It s just light.
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You probably don t think I m wearing lipstick, but if you want a natural, kind of easy look, I m a big fan.
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Oh, and did you say the color?
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It s rosé.
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Like, I think there s only one.
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Oh, okay.
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Great.
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Well, then I m going to go old school as well since you went old school.
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Is that old?
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No, that s not old school.
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That s new.
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Fuck.
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I went new school.
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You go old school.
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Okay.
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Old school for me, one of my tried and trues, if they have it in Sephora, I have to stock up.
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I have to have six of them, is the Dior Lip Glow.
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Ooh.
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I get it in berry.
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They have other colors.
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I think I bought one other color once, which I liked, but the berry, let me just make sure I m saying it right.
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That s the lip gloss.
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It s called Lip Glow.
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They have a gloss.
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This isn t a gloss.
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Oh, it s not.
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Okay.
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It s a lipstick, but it s more sheer.
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It also just adds, to me, the perfect amount of color.
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It looks so natural.
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It just, like, enhances your lips a little bit.
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Okay.
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Also adds, I feel, like, a little pumpiness.
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I m not wearing it today, unfortunately.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh, damn.
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Whatever you re wearing now looks great, too.
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Thank you.
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Tom Ford.
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Nice.
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Okay, so now it s my turn.
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Yes.
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My old school is, you know how, like, you ll see the bottle for, like, literally 10 years, but you re like, am I saying it right?
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I know.
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This is really good free advertising for all these.
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It is.
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Yeah, none of this is sponsored.
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Yeah.
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So the Mario Badescu, the rose water spray.
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Okay.
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For me, I need to have it.
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I had a hair and makeup person that would always put it on me before putting on anything and it was just this like ritual thing for me.
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It just smells so lovely.
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SPEAKER_00
Why does spraying your face feel so good?
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God, everything you re saying.
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Start spraying your cheeks.
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SPEAKER_00
No, but like why?
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SPEAKER_00
It just is a refresh.
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SPEAKER_00
It is a refresh.
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SPEAKER_00
Clodalie also has a really good mist.
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SPEAKER_00
Is that how you say it?
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SPEAKER_00
Because it s French.
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SPEAKER_00
I don t say it the French way because you wouldn t know what I m talking about.
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SPEAKER_00
Right, but is that how you would say it?
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It s Clodalie.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
But I think we re allowed to say Clodalie.
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I feel like I barely even knew how to say it the American way, so I m glad you just said it.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, we could say it the French way going forward.
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Say it again?
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Clodalie.
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Clodalie.
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You re so cute when you say it in French.
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So coquette.
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I could do AI for French.
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SPEAKER_01
You could.
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SPEAKER_00
But you look French.
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No!
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SPEAKER_00
Yes, you do.
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SPEAKER_00
You re French style.
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This is why I can t believe— You eat like a French woman.
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You have the French aesthetic.
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SPEAKER_00
Hello.
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SPEAKER_00
Oh, thank you.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, you mean clothes-wise.
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Fashion.
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Everything about you.
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French people listening, you can confirm this.
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It s like French women?
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SPEAKER_00
Are you kidding me?
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I m dying to be one.
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SPEAKER_00
Well, you basically are playing the part.
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Just to a T.
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I love that.
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SPEAKER_00
No, you are a French woman to me.
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People don t know this, but you have a nickname for me.
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I call you Coquette.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, which is a French word meaning... It means being like very cute and like beautiful and flirtatious.
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It is.
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I know.
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It s like ribbons.
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This is why the natal chart says I need more Pisces and why you re so good for me because you re so kind.
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Like you see me in a way that is that the rest of the world sees you and that you need to align with.
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Oh boy.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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Now.
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That s beautiful.
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Rosewater.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, Clodalie is not the rosewater.
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SPEAKER_00
Mario Badescu is the rosewater, but Clodalie has a facial mist.
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They do.
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Tried and true.
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SPEAKER_01
Everyone loves it.
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SPEAKER_01
People keep it in their purse.
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SPEAKER_01
I used to keep it in my purse, but I never used it.
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I liked it a lot.
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I just never
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picked it up and splashed my face, sprayed my face.
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Because I heard, spray your face, spray your cheeks.
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SPEAKER_00
I heard that your face is supposed to be wet before you put on any serums.
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SPEAKER_00
Damp?
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SPEAKER_00
Damp.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
It s all right.
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SPEAKER_00
Not wet.
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A facial spray could be, and I might, this might be totally wrong.
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But from what I understand from the science, it s a good way to dampen your face before you put on.
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From the science, we aren t sure about.
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SPEAKER_00
We are not sure.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, everything about this is very shaky.
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SPEAKER_01
I like that.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay, great.
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I ll do a skincare as well.
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Speaking of serums, this is a two for one.
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IS Clinical, I don t know if it s, I think it s IS, because it s a lower I and a capital S. IS Clinical is the brand.
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They have a serum called the Active Serum.
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It s so good.
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I don t know what s in it, but definitely get a tingle from it.
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It feels like it s really clean, like getting deep and it must have salicylic or some sort of acid in it that s really good for acne skin or yeah, anytime you re like having anything hormonal or you just have a tough time with skin as I do.
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It s so good as a day to day evening preventing, like getting ahead of the zits.
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The zits.
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The zits.
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So it s great.
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And then I combine that with their proactive heal.
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To me, again, I don t know what s in it.
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I think it has vitamin C in it because it s really nice for brightening.
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It feels like liquid gold.
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It s like liquid diamonds and liquid gold.
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Wow.
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Because one s blue and one s gold.
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Oh, got it.
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Is it the see-through blue thing?
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SPEAKER_00
It s a little see-through.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Someone very scientific recommended it to me.
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He was like an esthetician.
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Basically, I kept breaking out and he was like, stop putting rose water.
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I m kidding, I m kidding.
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SPEAKER_00
He was like, stop putting so many lotions.
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SPEAKER_00
And like, again, lotion can be great.
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SPEAKER_00
You know, figuring out what your skin needs is like a whole thing.
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What a fucking lifelong journey.
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SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
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And this bleeds actually into my
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My other recommendation, if we re going to talk about serums, my favorite hyaluronic acid serum is La Roche.
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All these are French.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, La Roche-Posay.
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SPEAKER_01
La Roche-Posay.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s French.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it is.
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SPEAKER_00
I didn t even think of that.
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SPEAKER_00
I do have some French stuff going on.
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SPEAKER_01
Because you say that I m a French girl.
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SPEAKER_01
You re actually a French girl.
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SPEAKER_01
You re French.
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I m French Canadian.
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SPEAKER_00
It s very different, but I m French adjacent.
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SPEAKER_00
But yes, I love their, it s a hyaluronic acid and like bee something, one of the bees vitamins that you need.
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SPEAKER_00
And it just feels, because obviously you want something that makes your skin look good, but you want something that you re looking forward to putting on.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, luxurious.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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And it just feels like taking care of yourself.
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SPEAKER_00
It s my favorite.
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SPEAKER_00
And hyaluronic acid for me was kind of a game changer because I can break out kind of easily and doing too many moisturizers, which is what I was doing at the time before my intervention, and it was really helpful.
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SPEAKER_00
And it s good, especially in the cold winter days, which a lot of people are experiencing.
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SPEAKER_00
That s right.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
So next I will say...
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SPEAKER_00
You re choosing between your favorites?
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
And you feel bad?
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SPEAKER_00
It s hard.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know.
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SPEAKER_00
I feel like I m hurting their feelings.
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SPEAKER_00
There s so many good ones.
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SPEAKER_00
Because it s not like I don t like the other ones.
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SPEAKER_01
Okay, one right now is Merit Brand.
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SPEAKER_01
M-E-R-I-T.
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SPEAKER_01
You know so many like intricate— I ve never heard of this.
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SPEAKER_01
It s such a good makeup brand.
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SPEAKER_01
It s not new on the market, but newer, I guess.
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SPEAKER_01
Like, new to Sephora is in the past couple years.
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SPEAKER_01
It s an incredible brand.
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SPEAKER_01
I like it across the board.
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SPEAKER_01
Their Flush Balm, which is a cheek balm, it s so nice because I like both a powder and a dewy cheek.
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SPEAKER_01
Sure.
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SPEAKER_01
So I often combine.
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SPEAKER_01
I ll do like a little bit of a dewy, which Merit has these flush balms that are great, and they have really good colors.
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SPEAKER_01
I really like, there s one called Foxy, I think, or Fox, and one called Beverly Hills.
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SPEAKER_01
Both I really, really like.
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SPEAKER_01
And I do a little on like the cheek bone of the dew.
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SPEAKER_01
And then I ll do, like there s a Chanel powder blush, Rose Bronze.
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SPEAKER_00
Ooh.
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SPEAKER_01
And I ll do a little of that on the apple of my cheek.
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SPEAKER_01
And then a little brush over the nose.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, cute.
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SPEAKER_01
Quick.
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SPEAKER_01
But Merit, the more dewy cream blush, is so nice.
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SPEAKER_01
It s called the Flush Bomb.
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SPEAKER_01
But they also have some really good tinted lip oils.
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SPEAKER_01
I feel like you ll like it if you like the lip stain.
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SPEAKER_01
They re really, really nice and have gorgeous colors.
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SPEAKER_01
Also, the packaging s really nice.
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SPEAKER_01
I recommend Merit.
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SPEAKER_01
I m going to look into that.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay, this is a huge one for me.
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SPEAKER_00
Youth To The People have a lot of great skincare stuff.
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SPEAKER_00
Their Super Berry Hydrate Plus Glow Dream Mask, which I know Rob uses.
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SPEAKER_00
I m sure you can relate.
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SPEAKER_00
It s an experience.
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SPEAKER_00
What s it feel like?
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SPEAKER_00
It feels like if skincare felt like a marshmallow.
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SPEAKER_00
and smelled like a garden of roses.
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SPEAKER_00
I am transported.
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SPEAKER_00
What I like about it is that, especially, again, in the winter days, you want to hydrate your skin in a way that, like, my favorite... My last bit is going to be controversial because I don t know if it s good or not that I m doing it, but locking in moisture is a priority of mine.
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SPEAKER_00
So I love when I wake... Is your next one, like, wrapping your face in, like, saran wrap or something?
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SPEAKER_00
Might as well be.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay, I m just going to tell you.
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SPEAKER_00
I, at the end of my routine, I mean I m single so I can do whatever the fuck I want, I take a bunch of Vaseline and I just spread it on my face.
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SPEAKER_00
I used to only put it on my under eyes to really get, lock in the moisture there, which I do recommend, but I ve started just doing it like fully on my face.
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SPEAKER_00
But it locks in all of the steps.
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SPEAKER_00
What s your pillow like?
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SPEAKER_00
Well, they re white.
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SPEAKER_00
But are they covered in goo when you wake up?
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SPEAKER_00
I guess not.
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SPEAKER_00
Whoa.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they re not.
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SPEAKER_00
So I don t know what s going on there.
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SPEAKER_00
I mean, I do scroll for a little bit before I go to bed, so it probably dries a moment to dry.
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SPEAKER_00
Still, though.
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SPEAKER_00
But yeah, my pillows are fine.
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SPEAKER_00
Fine, I think.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay, okay.
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SPEAKER_00
But yeah, it s not for everybody.
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SPEAKER_00
And again, I don t know if I m supposed to do this or not, but for me, it really, in the wintertime, you constantly feel like you re never really hydrated enough.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, exactly.
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SPEAKER_00
Do you have dry skin?
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SPEAKER_00
I have a mixed thing.
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SPEAKER_00
Combo, combination skin.
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SPEAKER_00
So combo, which is why it s annoying or difficult.
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SPEAKER_00
I wouldn t do it during the summer.
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SPEAKER_00
During the summer, my skin gets more oily, so I wouldn t do it.
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SPEAKER_01
I would say if you are an oily skin person- No, don t do this.
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SPEAKER_01
Don t do this.
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SPEAKER_01
I could never do that.
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SPEAKER_01
My skin would implode.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay, interesting.
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SPEAKER_01
Because all the pores get clogged.
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SPEAKER_00
But it s just overnight.
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SPEAKER_00
It s just to seal it in.
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SPEAKER_01
I m not here to challenge.
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SPEAKER_01
I think what works for you works for you.
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SPEAKER_00
What s interesting about it is that it doesn t make me break out, but oils make me break out.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s common.
1
SPEAKER_00
The very famous serum that starts with a V that won t be named because
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t want to name brands and say bad things about it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, sure.
1
SPEAKER_00
But that one feels great, but for me it created so many breakouts because there s oils in it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oil on your face can be, again, for some people totally… For some people it s perfect.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
1
SPEAKER_00
But for a lot of people it can be harmful.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m curious what people think.
1
SPEAKER_01
Or maybe there s other people who are doing this.
1
SPEAKER_01
I know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m curious too.
1
SPEAKER_01
Wait, what was the second to last one?
1
SPEAKER_01
The Superglow.
1
SPEAKER_01
Superglow is the mask.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, if you don t wanna do the Vaseline rub, that s how I got into Vaseline.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh wow, baby steps.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, the Superglow mask is like an overnight mask.
1
SPEAKER_00
You put it on sort of at the end of your routine and it kind of locks in moisture.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s just very luscious and creamy and hydrating.
1
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
1
SPEAKER_00
I wanna try that.
1
SPEAKER_01
It smells amazing.
1
SPEAKER_01
I love the idea of a marshmallow on my face.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it feels like if a marshmallow was part of your skincare routine.
1
SPEAKER_01
Okay, next for me is also a mask.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m just sort of,
1
SPEAKER_01
going off of you.
1
SPEAKER_01
Now, people aren t going to like this.
1
SPEAKER_01
This is not a cheap mask.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s the brand 111 Skin or 111 Skin.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how to say any of these names.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think it should be 111 because that sounds cooler.
1
SPEAKER_01
It does sound cooler.
1
SPEAKER_01
They have sheet masks.
1
SPEAKER_01
that are incredible.
1
SPEAKER_01
And they have so many.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s like a black diamond lifting and firming.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s a biocellulose facial mask.
1
SPEAKER_01
I just like the light blue one, which is a cryo de-puffing facial mask.
1
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s really nice.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s like cold.
1
SPEAKER_01
You put it on your face.
1
SPEAKER_01
You just let it sit for, I think like 20, 25 minutes.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then you like, you know, kind of pat in the serum at the end.
1
SPEAKER_01
Always the next morning after I do it, my skin looks
1
SPEAKER_01
much different.
1
SPEAKER_01
I should do it every day, but I don t think you re supposed to.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think masks, they say, like, weekly, right?
1
SPEAKER_01
I know.
1
SPEAKER_01
It probably also clogs.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, you do have to be a little careful once you see a little something.
1
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes I do this, right?
1
SPEAKER_01
I m like, this is such a good serum.
1
SPEAKER_01
I look so glowy.
1
SPEAKER_01
And even though it says, like, start three times a week, I ll just be like, no, twice a day.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then, like, everything s fucked.
1
SPEAKER_00
I did have a pretty meaningful conversation with a woman at Sephora a couple months ago that startled me a bit, where she was like, you should not be using serums every day.
1
SPEAKER_00
all of these things can make like retinol.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, retinol s intense.
1
SPEAKER_00
Again, I m saying this wrong and like please correct us, but there s something that happens to your skin where it becomes more vulnerable to the sun and to sun damage if you re using a lot of different, you know.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yes, that is true.
1
SPEAKER_00
And again, there s no connection to your mask, but for some of these things, because I, same, I ll get obsessed with something and I realize, I mean, there was this whole trend of like cycling, skin cycling, where it s like one day,
1
SPEAKER_00
You do this, the next day you do another thing.
1
SPEAKER_00
You have to give your skin, like, breaks.
1
SPEAKER_00
But now yours has made me want to change my last one because I m inspired by your mask.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because I have a great mask that really should be very expensive, but it s not.
1
SPEAKER_00
So it s kind of a hack.
1
SPEAKER_00
And again, it s the same makeup artist that recommended it.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s the Neutrogena Hydrogel.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s so liquidy and dewy and it s very good for the wintertime.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s filled with hyaluronic acid.
1
SPEAKER_00
She would put it on right before she would do my makeup, which actually was kind of interesting because then again, it just made my skin so much better that I needed a lot less makeup.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you want the skin underneath the makeup to be as primed and hydrated and moisturized as possible.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I am shocked when I do it.
1
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, it s like three bucks.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, again, I m sure your mask is better.
1
SPEAKER_00
But if you want like a lower cost option, you buy at CVS.
1
SPEAKER_00
They put it behind the little prison.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, they do?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, because people love it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Is it because people love it or is it because people love it?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they want to just keep things away from you.
1
SPEAKER_01
Or does it have an ingredient?
1
SPEAKER_01
Is it behind the pharmacy?
1
SPEAKER_01
No, no, no.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so at the CVS in Brooklyn, like, everything was behind a little gated plastic thing where you have to, like, ring the little doorbell for an attendant to come and open it up for you.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because I think there was just a lot of theft of Neutrogena masks because we know that that s what burgers were.
1
SPEAKER_00
Wow, I didn t know.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m going to get some just because it s obviously limited edition.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s limited edition.
1
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_01
About to be more limited edition after people listen to this.
1
SPEAKER_01
Geez.
1
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I think I have one left.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think this has been really helpful for people.
1
SPEAKER_01
Actually, it s been really helpful for me.
1
SPEAKER_01
I love knowing what people are doing.
1
SPEAKER_00
I do too.
1
SPEAKER_01
I know not everyone loves watching like Vogue Beauty Secrets, but I do love it.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s interesting.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s just, and again, it might work for you, might not work for you.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s just fun to know what people are
2
SPEAKER_00
are up to.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I agree.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so my last one is going to be foundation.
2
SPEAKER_00
I really love Monica Blunder.
2
SPEAKER_00
I know, her name is Monica Blunder.
2
SPEAKER_00
For me, it s a perfect match.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, let s talk about having brown skin in America.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s time to talk about that.
2
SPEAKER_00
It is really hard.
2
SPEAKER_01
The hardest part.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like, all we talk about is racism, but no one s talking about...
2
SPEAKER_00
brown skin and beauty.
2
SPEAKER_00
No, actually people are.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like, it s actually a huge part of racism and people do talk about it.
2
SPEAKER_00
But a lot of beauty brands just don t have the right colors for darker skin.
2
SPEAKER_00
And they have like 14 shades of white and then three shades of darker colored skin.
2
SPEAKER_00
And like, of course you re not going to fit into any of those.
2
SPEAKER_00
So it s hard to find brands that really have a great scale of color.
2
SPEAKER_00
I have to be very honest, I don t know if Monica Blunder does.
2
SPEAKER_00
I haven t really looked into her scale.
2
SPEAKER_00
I just know that I have a foundation from her that is my perfect match.
2
SPEAKER_00
So when I find that, for me, it s just like, that s it.
2
SPEAKER_00
But also the formula is so nice.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, it s not dewy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, I don t love any more.
2
SPEAKER_00
I used to love – what s the – we won t say it.
2
SPEAKER_00
We won t say it because we re not saying brands we don t want to do.
2
SPEAKER_00
But there s a very, very, very popular foundation by a brand that starts with a G-A.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s a beautiful foundation.
2
SPEAKER_01
Something we re like, we re not going to say her name, but it starts with D and it ends with A. It s two words and the first one starts with G and the second one starts with A.
2
SPEAKER_00
But it s a beautiful foundation.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s a great, great product.
2
SPEAKER_00
Obviously, a billion people use it.
2
SPEAKER_00
But it was a little too glowy.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was a little too glowy for me.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve moved more towards a, like, as natural as I can get skin makeup.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I don t feel like I walk around and you can tell I m wearing a bunch of foundation.
2
SPEAKER_00
I can t tell.
2
SPEAKER_00
It kind of melts into your skin.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s just a very nice formula.
2
SPEAKER_00
But it still gives you, like, a coverage.
2
SPEAKER_00
You can build it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Anyway, Monica Blunder foundation.
2
SPEAKER_00
I highly recommend.
2
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_00
Support for Synced comes from Skims.
2
SPEAKER_00
We love Skims.
2
SPEAKER_00
So much.
2
SPEAKER_01
I live in a post-Skim world where like I can now wear bras.
2
SPEAKER_01
Because of sizing.
2
SPEAKER_01
Sizing and comfort.
2
SPEAKER_01
Like I don t understand how they just can make something that s so comfortable and that looks so good.
2
SPEAKER_00
Skims is creating the next generation of underwear and bras for everybody.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I m wearing right now, let me take a look, the Fits Everybody t-shirt bra.
2
SPEAKER_00
Me too!
2
SPEAKER_00
In sienna.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
2
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_01
I have it in onyx.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s so comfortable.
2
SPEAKER_00
It is.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I guess it does fit everybody because we have very different boobs.
2
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
2
SPEAKER_01
SKIMS bras are made with innovative technology to give you the best shape and support.
2
SPEAKER_01
Plus every bra is designed with the comfiest and softest materials so you ll feel like you re wearing nothing
2
SPEAKER_01
at all.
2
SPEAKER_01
SKIMS offers a complete system of bra solutions for every need and style.
2
SPEAKER_01
SKIMS bras are available now in 62 sizes, 30A to 46H.
2
SPEAKER_00
Believe the hype.
2
SPEAKER_00
SKIMS has over 100,000 five-star reviews for a reason.
2
SPEAKER_00
SKIMS bras are now available at SKIMS.com.
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SPEAKER_00
Plus, get free shipping on orders over $75.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you haven t yet, be sure to let them know we sent you.
2
SPEAKER_00
After you place your order, select podcast in the survey and select synced in the dropdown menu that follows.
2
SPEAKER_00
Support for Synced comes from Factor.
2
SPEAKER_00
Get started on your resolutions with Factor so you are ready for the new year.
2
SPEAKER_00
Factor s ready-to-eat meal delivery takes the stress out of meal planning and sets you up for success.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is amazing because there s no time.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
There s just no time.
2
SPEAKER_01
There is no time.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it tastes like you just made it.
2
SPEAKER_01
And their smoothies, like, they re so healthy and yet they taste so good.
2
SPEAKER_01
I actually don t get it.
2
SPEAKER_01
I know.
2
SPEAKER_01
How it s possible.
2
SPEAKER_01
I know.
2
SPEAKER_01
We talked about this the other day.
2
SPEAKER_01
We re skeptical, but we re not.
2
SPEAKER_01
Because then you read the ingredients and it s just very, very fresh food.
2
SPEAKER_01
It feels like you did your meal prep on that Sunday, but all week you re just having the freshest, most healthy and delicious food.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and they have over 35 meals to choose from per week and you can do
2
SPEAKER_00
Keto or calorie smart, vegan and veggie, there s so many options.
2
SPEAKER_00
I know a lot of people have been in sort of food ruts lately.
2
SPEAKER_00
I think the start of the year it s like kind of a sludge and it s dark and it s wintry and this can just like take one thing off your plate.
2
SPEAKER_01
So head to factormeals.com slash synced50 and use code synced50 to get 50% off.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s code synced50 at factormeals.com slash synced50 to get 50% off.
2
SPEAKER_01
Can we go into being brown in America and just— Because I think that s such an important— Oh, brunch?
2
SPEAKER_00
No, we ll get back to brunch, but I think we should go to Sephora for this video.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s a good idea.
2
SPEAKER_01
Or I do your makeup and you don t mind.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that s fun.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let s do that.
2
SPEAKER_01
Or like David doesn t wake up.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, you always want to like add in the boys.
2
SPEAKER_01
I center men.
2
SPEAKER_01
I know, you sure do.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t need to decenter them.
2
SPEAKER_01
I just think those videos are funny and I never had a boyfriend
2
SPEAKER_01
You know when, like, there s a fun girlfriend-boyfriend trend?
2
SPEAKER_01
Not really.
2
SPEAKER_01
I really don t.
2
SPEAKER_01
I can t name a single fucking one.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so I feel like I never had a boyfriend at the moment where that was a trend, where, like, your boyfriend does your makeup.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know this trend.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t.
2
SPEAKER_01
You don t?
2
SPEAKER_00
No.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, it was cute.
2
SPEAKER_01
Anyway, the time has passed.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, it s just the way that racism or sexism, right, all these isms, it s obviously these like big institutional things that have huge consequences on our lives in like these huge ways.
2
SPEAKER_01
But the way that they like can make you the most mad is when it shows up in these like little small moments.
2
SPEAKER_00
This store is just teeming with products and it s so hard to find one that matches or is good.
2
SPEAKER_00
When I was younger, my aunt was really good at makeup and did makeup a lot and was really interested in makeup products.
2
SPEAKER_00
And she would talk to me about it, and she got me my first makeup item ever, which is still tried and true.
2
SPEAKER_00
Gonna shout it out.
2
SPEAKER_00
Clinique Black Honey.
2
SPEAKER_00
What is that?
2
SPEAKER_00
It s a lipstick stain.
2
SPEAKER_00
It looks good on every single person.
2
SPEAKER_00
It really does.
2
SPEAKER_00
When you take the lid off, the top off... What s it called?
2
SPEAKER_00
Cap?
2
SPEAKER_00
Cap.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
See, Rob, when you take the cap— See, men know everything.
2
SPEAKER_00
Liz is vindicated.
2
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so you take the cap off and it s very dark.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, it looks black.
2
SPEAKER_00
And so you think this is gonna look crazy.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then it s just this nice, very light berry.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s gorgeous.
2
SPEAKER_00
Jess was using it over the holidays.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, and so it works for men, it s not that, it s so subtle.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s light, yes, it s very light.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, interesting.
2
SPEAKER_00
Anyway, she taught me about Black Honey, and then she would say these makeup brands are good for our skin type, or like good for people with darker skin, and I hated that.
2
SPEAKER_00
I went in the opposite direction.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was like, I m not using that.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna use these white people s and prove that I can wear it too.
2
SPEAKER_00
I can t.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, it doesn t look as good as formulas and makeup artists and makeup brands who have specifically thought about the undertones.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, there s so much to it.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like, what s the undertone in our skin and what brings out those colors.
2
SPEAKER_00
If they re just using a white person as the prototype, it s never going to look as good on someone with darker skin.
2
SPEAKER_00
They have to, like, it has to be active.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s an active choice.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s not that,
2
SPEAKER_00
And that was one thing I learned like when a lot of this was coming up a couple of years ago about colorism and stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
And this was sort of a derivative of it.
2
SPEAKER_00
A lot of people and this is true.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s not that they re actively not trying to put out colors for darker skinned people.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s just extra work.
2
SPEAKER_00
And it is extra work.
2
SPEAKER_00
They then now have to have a person of color who they re testing on and who they re using those tones for.
2
SPEAKER_00
And is that a minority group?
2
SPEAKER_00
So will those not sell very much?
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, there s so much that goes into it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I have compassion.
2
SPEAKER_00
And also, I feel like, yeah, you just got to do it anyway for the greater good.
2
SPEAKER_01
And there s less and less white people.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, the percentage of the population that is, you know, we re all mixing up with each other.
2
SPEAKER_01
And so there s going to be more and more of a demand.
2
SPEAKER_01
So it makes sense to not just fill the demand that there is right now, but get ahead of the demand that s also coming.
2
SPEAKER_01
It just makes, like, business sense.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but it s sad, and you re right.
2
SPEAKER_01
It is those little baby moments where you... For me, with sexism, it s when I m traveling.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s when my body knows, or like the universe, and it s like, you re gonna get your period.
2
SPEAKER_01
Like 95% of the time that I m traveling, for some reason, I get my period, and then I ll get to the hotel, I ll like get my period on the plane or something stupid or whatever, and then I m like, get to my hotel, I m in a city I don t know, or it s late and things are closed, and there s a Bible in the hotel room
3
SPEAKER_01
but there s no tampons.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I could get maybe like a toothbrush or like I could get a hairdryer and this hair, like so many things, but not get a pad.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s true.
3
SPEAKER_01
And because you re frustrated and you just want this little thing and you re like, now I have to- Go figure it out.
3
SPEAKER_01
Go figure it out and not be, you know, living my life.
3
SPEAKER_01
And those are the moments I feel like is when I get the most angry as opposed to moments where it s a bigger thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, I get that.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah, because also the bigger things are more esoteric.
3
SPEAKER_00
Their philosophies and their thoughts and their projections.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is practical day-to-day shit that we encounter, and that s when you notice it.
3
SPEAKER_00
And that s privilege, right?
3
SPEAKER_00
When you aren t encountering day-to-day.
3
SPEAKER_01
And that s the thing, maybe it could be invisible for a minute, but then becomes impossible to ignore in that moment that you re like, I can t just go on with my life.
3
SPEAKER_00
Man.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
We went light and we went deep.
3
SPEAKER_00
As we do.
3
SPEAKER_00
As we do.
3
SPEAKER_00
We re going to do one more.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so we went to brunch.
3
SPEAKER_00
We did.
3
SPEAKER_00
Also, shout out, we didn t get her name.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, we should have actually.
3
SPEAKER_00
She was a big fan of Liz and she also loved your coat.
3
SPEAKER_00
She did.
3
SPEAKER_00
And you let her try it on.
3
SPEAKER_00
I did.
3
SPEAKER_00
This was, okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
We re just so different.
3
SPEAKER_00
We re so different.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s a beautiful thing.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s a great thing what you did.
3
SPEAKER_00
I couldn t believe it.
3
SPEAKER_00
I had to, with my hand, shut my jaw.
3
SPEAKER_00
Why?
3
SPEAKER_00
I didn t really.
3
SPEAKER_00
But I was like,
3
SPEAKER_01
What are you doing?
3
SPEAKER_01
But I ve let so many people try on my coat.
3
SPEAKER_01
Ew!
3
SPEAKER_01
But also, that doesn t creep you out a little bit?
3
SPEAKER_01
No, I get so much joy out of it because they re like, you remember our coat that we both had matching coats?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
That coat, people stopped me and like, I wore it in Canada.
3
SPEAKER_01
I wore it to Sundance last year when I went.
3
SPEAKER_01
And every time someone stops me and like, oh my God, I love your coat.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s so amazing.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, you should get it.
3
SPEAKER_01
They re like, maybe I will.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m like, try it on.
3
SPEAKER_01
Because then, first of all, it s expensive.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like, if you re gonna spend money, and that s the thing with online shopping, like, you can never try it on, but here s an opportunity for you to try on the thing and know that it looks amazing on you or not.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t know why, to me, that level of generosity of spirit and kindness, that is so foreign to me.
3
SPEAKER_00
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s great.
3
SPEAKER_00
I am not saying it s bad.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s not like you giving your phone number out every day.
3
SPEAKER_00
I wish you would do a little less of that.
3
SPEAKER_00
But this is just really kind.
3
SPEAKER_00
My hang-up, I think, is based in my, like, skeptical nature.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
1A.
3
SPEAKER_00
1A.
3
SPEAKER_01
Are you giving us like a PowerPoint presentation?
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I love this actually.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would love a PowerPoint presentation of why you don t want people to try on your coat.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay, let s be clear, let s be clear.
3
SPEAKER_00
Strangers, yeah, again, it s about strangers.
3
SPEAKER_00
Obviously, I don t give a fuck of anyone in my life.
3
SPEAKER_00
I want people in my life to try it on.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it s my relationship to strangers versus your relationship to strangers.
3
SPEAKER_00
They just could not be more different.
3
SPEAKER_00
And 1A is germs.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, I don t know why, I think it s like, I just, people have smells and, like, their
3
SPEAKER_00
hair oils and like we don t know how long they ve gone without showering and also what if they had sex with someone and then that person like left their what juice their cum on their shirt and then now it s in your coat wow okay okay that is not where my mind goes
3
SPEAKER_00
There s just a million things that can be happening on your body, and you just don t know anything about a stranger.
3
SPEAKER_00
You just don t know anything.
3
SPEAKER_00
1B.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is so bad.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m like, it s gonna get stolen.
3
SPEAKER_01
You think someone s gonna put on my coat and run?
3
SPEAKER_00
It s very subconscious.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t think that consciously, and I don t think it s real.
3
SPEAKER_00
There s no way that anyone was gonna just run off with your coat.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, I know that, but I think it s like just this deep ingrained thing that would be a part of preventing me from doing it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Got it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Safety.
3
SPEAKER_00
I see.
3
SPEAKER_00
3C, back to the smells.
3
SPEAKER_00
He smells exclamation point.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I know.
3
SPEAKER_00
I know 4F.
3
SPEAKER_00
It requires more time engaging.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, got it.
3
SPEAKER_00
You want to end the interaction.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
I like a very pleasant, quick exchange.
3
SPEAKER_00
And then that s it.
3
SPEAKER_00
And they re holding my coat.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like, oh my God, you re trapped.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like until they decide to give you the coat back, you re stuck.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s now, you ve now given them control.
3
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
But, okay, just to, you know, respond.
3
SPEAKER_01
Are you going to do it in PowerPoint?
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, yeah, yeah, PowerPoint, PowerPoint.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, well, 1A, I m going in reverse order to respond to your latest point.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_01
1A is you never have control.
3
SPEAKER_01
And whether someone has your code or not doesn t determine whether you re in control of the interaction or not.
3
SPEAKER_01
And so if they were to put on my coat for a little too long, I would feel empowered to say, it looks great.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I would use language in order to make the interaction end when I would want it to.
3
SPEAKER_01
I think that I m somewhat confident.
3
SPEAKER_01
Look, OK, here s where I wouldn t let someone try on my coat.
3
SPEAKER_01
if we are seated next to each other on an eight-hour plane ride.
3
SPEAKER_01
Because then I am stuck.
3
SPEAKER_01
Then we are forming this bond and there s no exit strategy for me.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I need to work on planes.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t want to talk on planes.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would feel stuck.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would feel trapped.
3
SPEAKER_01
Whereas this feels very... She was also the bartender.
3
SPEAKER_00
No, she was amazing.
3
SPEAKER_00
This isn t about her.
3
SPEAKER_00
It just is an example.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is fascinating because I would be more likely to do it on a plane.
3
SPEAKER_00
Because we re already in it.
3
SPEAKER_00
There s no control anymore.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like we re just there in this environment.
3
SPEAKER_00
If I let someone borrow my coat and then they were just like, I love it so much.
3
SPEAKER_00
And they were never giving it back.
3
SPEAKER_00
I would just turn my head to the window and then sleep.
3
SPEAKER_00
Right?
3
SPEAKER_00
Like you can sleep or put headphones.
3
SPEAKER_00
There are ways to end the interaction that are societally
3
SPEAKER_00
Known.
3
SPEAKER_00
Got it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Like putting your headphones in or sleeping or something.
3
SPEAKER_00
You can t do that at a restaurant when you re staring at the person and they re holding it on your ear.
3
SPEAKER_00
But also stare and like wait for the coat to come back to you.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
Honestly, let s roleplay this.
3
SPEAKER_00
OK, I m going to be I m going to be I m going to be a stranger.
3
SPEAKER_00
OK.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh, are you Liz Plank?
3
SPEAKER_01
Wait, are we roleplaying this as a way to heal my issue, or are we doing this as what I would do?
3
SPEAKER_00
You are going to do as you would do.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, okay, got it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay, great.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh my gosh, are you Liz Plank?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh, I m such a big fan.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love your work.
3
SPEAKER_01
Thank you so much.
3
SPEAKER_00
I ve read your book like six times and I even read it out loud to my boyfriend.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s exactly why I wrote that book.
3
SPEAKER_00
That makes me so happy.
3
SPEAKER_00
But then he did break up with me, but then it was okay because we were supposed to break up.
3
SPEAKER_01
That s wonderful.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m so happy for you.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
What is that coat?
3
SPEAKER_01
I love your coat.
3
SPEAKER_01
I know.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s so great, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
Where d you get that?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s Celia B. She s an amazing designer.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s so cozy.
3
SPEAKER_01
It has big pockets.
3
SPEAKER_01
Look at the inside.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s super pretty.
3
SPEAKER_01
Do you want to try it on?
3
SPEAKER_01
Are you serious?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
Try it on.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s so luscious.
3
SPEAKER_01
I can try it?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m smelling it.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m smelling it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m smelling it.
3
SPEAKER_00
That makes me a little uncomfortable.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
3
SPEAKER_00
It kind of smells like you.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
Putting it on.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh, it s so cozy.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
People aren t seeing, but you re smelling like snorting the goat.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s not even that funny.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
3
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_00
This is so warm and cozy.
3
SPEAKER_01
You should totally get one.
3
SPEAKER_00
How much is it?
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s kind of expensive, but she does a lot of sales.
3
SPEAKER_01
See, if you started sniffing around- No, I want you to do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Do it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Be you.
3
SPEAKER_01
I would be gesturing towards taking it off the person.
3
SPEAKER_00
But then I m like, ooh.
3
SPEAKER_00
People can t see.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m wrapping it even further.
3
SPEAKER_00
I m making it a big bundle.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I just love it.
3
SPEAKER_00
Where are you going later?
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I m not going anywhere, but I will need my coat back because it s cold out there.
3
SPEAKER_01
But you should totally get your own.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s amazing.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then I would again be like taking it, pulling it up, you know, the way that they do it at restaurants, you know, in a polite, sweet way.
3
SPEAKER_01
OK, you did handle that better than I anticipated.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s like the hostage negotiation.
3
SPEAKER_01
It is, it is.
3
SPEAKER_01
It seems like you like the smell of my coat.
3
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so you like the smell of my coat.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s hard because the coat is hostage.
3
SPEAKER_00
It was.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
But no, that would make me uncomfortable if they said smells like you.
4
SPEAKER_01
I never know.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, first of all, the people who read my books and listen to this podcast, like, the sweetest, smartest, most amazing people ever.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s remarkable.
4
SPEAKER_00
It is.
4
SPEAKER_00
The fan base is incredible.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s extraordinary people who are just living their lives at a level.
4
SPEAKER_01
I should have done it as a different.
4
SPEAKER_01
I should have just been someone who thought you were pretty.
4
SPEAKER_00
Who didn t know you.
4
SPEAKER_00
That has happened to me and they ve tried on my coat.
4
SPEAKER_00
And you ve done it?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
More times it s happened to people that just love the coat.
4
SPEAKER_01
But people who just think you re so pretty, that s even scarier because then they want to single white female you.
4
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
4
SPEAKER_01
Single white female me.
4
SPEAKER_00
They want to be you.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, that s only happened to me once.
4
SPEAKER_01
Support for Syncd comes from Needed.
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SPEAKER_01
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SPEAKER_01
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4
SPEAKER_01
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4
SPEAKER_01
That s obviously why they called it that because this area is so overlooked.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
4
SPEAKER_00
You re growing a human inside of you.
4
SPEAKER_01
It still blows my mind.
4
SPEAKER_01
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4
SPEAKER_01
That s
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my gosh.
4
SPEAKER_01
So many, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
And most prenatal vitamins include bare minimum nutrition based on outdated guidance and stale research.
4
SPEAKER_01
We learned about this on Rice to 35, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Like all this research happened so long ago and then they were like, done, all done.
4
SPEAKER_01
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4
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It s really nice.
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4
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SPEAKER_01
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4
SPEAKER_00
I did have a real, look, this was not coat related, but I did have one bad experience with being too friendly.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was going on this date from the internet and so I m waiting for this person at the bar.
4
SPEAKER_00
Either I m early or he s a few minutes late.
4
SPEAKER_00
Two women and a guy are sitting at this bar and they re like having such a good time and they re like, oh my God, you re so beautiful.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, I love your outfit.
4
SPEAKER_00
They re like, are you here alone?
4
SPEAKER_00
I was like, no, no, I m just going on a date.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m just waiting.
4
SPEAKER_00
They re like, oh my God, he s so lucky to go on a date with you.
4
SPEAKER_00
And it was very brief, very positive and normal, but like sweet interaction.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then I walk off, the guy gets there and we go and sit down.
4
SPEAKER_00
I guess they got progressively drunker and drunker, which honestly is probably the main thing to take into consideration here.
4
SPEAKER_00
But they got way too overly invested in me as like a person.
4
SPEAKER_00
And it was like they were my sisters or something like that.
4
SPEAKER_00
And they were like, is this guy good enough for her?
4
SPEAKER_00
Like all this energy, which again at the beginning was kind of
4
SPEAKER_00
funny or like, you know, they were like looking back like, so cool.
4
SPEAKER_00
But then I went to the bathroom and I got cornered and they came into the bathroom.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know how girl bathroom etiquette is you go very deep with women in the women s bathroom.
4
SPEAKER_00
You ll have deep conversations at like clubs and bars mostly, sometimes in restaurants too.
4
SPEAKER_00
But if there s drinking involved, it s kind of a whole meme on the internet.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it was a little like that, but I couldn t leave.
4
SPEAKER_00
They stood in front of the door?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they were really, and again, very drunk and I wasn t because I m on a date, I m having dinner.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then they kind of were coming up to the table then after that and being like, you know, like, she s amazing, you know that, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And then by the end, it like totally ruined the date.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like the guy was very uncomfortable.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then I, we never went on a second date.
4
SPEAKER_00
So that was my only...
4
SPEAKER_00
Basically, my point is, usually I have a radar.
4
SPEAKER_00
And if the person is coming in with a creepy intention or like, I wouldn t have lent them my coat.
4
SPEAKER_00
But that was the one time that I was wrong.
4
SPEAKER_00
The energy ended up being kind of... It was so strange, actually.
4
SPEAKER_00
I still don t really know.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m like, did they like me?
4
SPEAKER_00
Did they want to have a threesome with you?
4
SPEAKER_00
Probably, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
That didn t even go through my mind.
4
SPEAKER_00
It was just weird.
4
SPEAKER_00
They hate this guy and they re like ruining this date, but pretending to be looking out for me.
4
SPEAKER_00
Have you ever had people do that?
4
SPEAKER_00
No!
4
SPEAKER_01
But also I ve never, I would have said something.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, how would you?
4
SPEAKER_01
If the bathroom thing is happening, I think I would say like, hey, I m feeling sort of uncomfortable.
4
SPEAKER_01
You need to let me go.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like I would make it clear I m not happy right now.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then if they came to the table, I would say, this feels pretty inappropriate.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m just trying to have a date.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was nice meeting you.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Harsher statements.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because you were probably being so nice.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was, because again, I m telling you the ending, but like 60% in, it was just funny.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, also like online dating is like, you re so awkward.
4
SPEAKER_00
So it almost made it just lighter.
4
SPEAKER_00
But no, then it veered.
4
SPEAKER_00
And if I d known that it would veer to that place, I would have never engaged with it.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I think I have an issue where I cope with discomfort by making people more comfortable.
4
SPEAKER_00
When I get uncomfortable or, again, I feel threatened, my go-to is to, I think a lot of women do this, is to just pacify, basically, so that the other person doesn t do worse things.
4
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, it is a strategy.
4
SPEAKER_01
My therapist has said that there s fight, flight, and fawn.
4
SPEAKER_01
And fawn is that.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s sort of giving them what they want so that it doesn t get too far out of control.
4
SPEAKER_01
It s upsetting.
4
SPEAKER_01
But yeah, it s very common.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ve done it too in certain circumstances.
4
SPEAKER_01
Again, not with strangers so much, but in a threatening situation, it s a tool that a lot of people, and especially a lot of women,
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Which is your favorite F?
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, the favorite... Well, your go-to.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
My go-to is flight, I think.
4
SPEAKER_01
Or if it s someone I know extremely well and something is going awry, fawn is my go-to.
4
SPEAKER_01
Right.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ve been aware of that, of when I use that and when I don t, and how I think I use that when I feel the most threatened, when I feel like my life is at stake.
4
SPEAKER_01
I ll fawn.
4
SPEAKER_01
But flight, in like a normal, average, threatening situation, I flee.
4
SPEAKER_01
I never really fight.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
In a threat.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do fight in life, like I ll debate, I ll like fight with people, but if like shit s getting real, no I don t.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
What about you?
4
SPEAKER_01
What s your favorite F?
4
SPEAKER_00
My favorite F is definitely flight.
4
SPEAKER_00
I love to leave, avoid the situation, but I think my go-to is
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
And fight has happened when, you know what, it happens when the other Fs don t work.
4
SPEAKER_00
I was in this like abusive relationship and like I had physical fight reactions which I ve never had in any of my other relationships.
4
SPEAKER_00
Interesting.
4
SPEAKER_00
Because he was so aggressive.
4
SPEAKER_00
I never heard him, but it almost felt so knee jerk that it felt almost out of my control.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like I remember once I just had my feet on the table and he was like yelling at me about whatever.
4
SPEAKER_00
It was just additive.
4
SPEAKER_00
And again, I felt he would never let me leave and is very toxic.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I remember once literally pushing the table so hard and it like
4
SPEAKER_00
Something broke and flew off of it, and I didn t even register that I was going to do that.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And that s how I knew, like, this is— Or, like, I broke my glasses once.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, I literally took my glasses, like, threw them to the floor.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_00
And they broke.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, what is going on?
4
SPEAKER_00
I didn t want to break my glasses.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s, like, just on me.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like, just, like—
4
SPEAKER_00
It s a stress response for me that is ignited, which might be a woman thing too.
4
SPEAKER_00
That seems right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Not a woman thing, but more common for us.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
4
SPEAKER_01
Well, okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t think we have time to get into what we talked about at brunch, so we ll do that next time.
4
SPEAKER_00
As my friend said, you guys never finish the pins.
4
SPEAKER_00
You guys put pins in and you don t go back to them.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
4
SPEAKER_00
We don t.
4
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
4
SPEAKER_01
The second one on the second page is good.
4
SPEAKER_00
Fantastic.
5
SPEAKER_01
Sorry I m slow.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oui.
5
SPEAKER_01
All right, let s do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Let s do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
It looks good.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, this is... Oh, boy.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
5
SPEAKER_01
Friend Talking Smack.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is from Anthony.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is a very specific scenario.
5
SPEAKER_01
But my friend has a podcast company that produces a lot of podcasts, and I listen to several of them, not all.
5
SPEAKER_01
She has always been very thankful for the support, but adds that we, our friends, don t have to listen to any of them.
5
SPEAKER_01
And I recently mentioned that there was one show that I did not listen to.
5
SPEAKER_01
I probably could have just kept that information to myself in retrospect, but she s always said listening is appreciated but not required.
5
SPEAKER_01
But still, I did feel bad about saying it, asking my wife if that was rude, but was assured it was no big deal, as our podcaster friend has always said listening was NBD.
5
SPEAKER_01
So imagine my surprise when I do tune into the show I rarely listen to,
5
SPEAKER_01
and hear the host talking about how miffed she is that I, me personally, don t listen to this specific branch, prong of the umbrella, saying that I am somehow anti-feminist for not listening to this one podcast.
5
SPEAKER_01
If you have something to say, say it to my face, Monica.
5
SPEAKER_01
Clears throat, then kindly.
5
SPEAKER_01
So my question is, do I need to apologize for telling my friend I didn t listen to their podcast, or do I need to demand an on-air apology for her defamatory blind item about me?
5
SPEAKER_01
Thanks, ladies.
5
SPEAKER_01
Keep up the great work.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, Anthony, now we can say it, because I kept him anonymous, but he just outed himself.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is Anthony Lombardo, old roommate of mine.
5
SPEAKER_01
I wasn t also just talking about Anthony, I was talking about somebody else who I will continue to keep anonymous.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, I thought there was someone else.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, there s somebody else.
5
SPEAKER_00
Who may be listening.
5
SPEAKER_01
Who also maybe has found his way.
5
SPEAKER_01
The answer is, do you need to apologize for telling me that you didn t listen?
5
SPEAKER_01
No, that s not what I m looking for.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m looking for why this one?
5
SPEAKER_01
I still don t know.
5
SPEAKER_01
You didn t answer.
5
SPEAKER_01
You didn t say.
5
SPEAKER_01
Should we call him?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_01
Damn it.
5
SPEAKER_01
No.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, fuck.
5
SPEAKER_01
I want him to pick up.
5
SPEAKER_01
I want to know why.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, we know why.
5
SPEAKER_01
But the reason I don t know why is because he is a feminist.
5
SPEAKER_01
Anthony, you are a feminist and you treat people well.
5
SPEAKER_01
I said all this.
5
SPEAKER_01
And now I have to repeat it.
5
SPEAKER_01
You treat people well.
5
SPEAKER_01
You treat me extremely well.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m very grateful for all the listening.
5
SPEAKER_01
You don t have to.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m not saying you should be listening to this.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m wondering why this.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m still wondering.
5
SPEAKER_01
And maybe you ll write in again and say.
5
SPEAKER_01
And I will apologize.
5
SPEAKER_01
Hmm.
5
SPEAKER_01
Will I apologize?
5
SPEAKER_01
This is an interesting.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, I will apologize if your feelings are hurt that I brought you up on this show anonymously to talk about an issue that I do think is an issue.
5
SPEAKER_01
But I don t think you re not a feminist.
5
SPEAKER_01
I want to make that clear.
5
SPEAKER_01
You are one.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I like your approach, which is like, I don t understand why.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s not a problem.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m just curious.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s not something I want him to fix.
5
SPEAKER_01
I don t want him to start.
5
SPEAKER_01
He shouldn t listen, because obviously I m going to keep talking about him.
5
SPEAKER_01
No, I m not.
5
SPEAKER_01
But I mean, yeah, I m curious.
5
SPEAKER_01
What is so lovely about him is I do know that him saying, I don t listen to Saint, it bothered him enough that he did ask his wife.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m sure all that s
5
SPEAKER_01
definitely real.
5
SPEAKER_01
It bothered him enough, he probably in his own head thought, why don t I listen to that?
5
SPEAKER_01
So what I love about Anthony is he writes his wrongs.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s all we are asking for.
5
SPEAKER_01
I want to know.
5
SPEAKER_01
I just want to know.
5
SPEAKER_01
I just want to know.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, to me, this is like what so many, again, not that all men should listen to a show or whatever.
5
SPEAKER_00
No.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s not about this show, but I think that this happens to a lot of men where they are going along in the sea of the patriarchy and like doing their role and doing the thing and like,
5
SPEAKER_00
listening to the things that they re told that they should be listening to.
5
SPEAKER_00
And again, we do this, white people, it happens with all the ism and all the identities.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then you get asked a question or called out or whatever it is, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
Where someone is like, but this isn t in alignment with what you say that you are or how you even seeing his potential as a person who I believe it is as your friend.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I think those moments are actually really important for men.
5
SPEAKER_01
I agree to just think and again you re right for all of us in all of our identities like why am I only listening to this lane of thinking and you aren t forced to think about it until someone says oh why haven t you listened to this and then you get probably get defensive and then if you re a good person like he is you then go huh
5
SPEAKER_01
Maybe I should listen and understand why I don t.
5
SPEAKER_01
It can still be I don t want to and I don t like it or it s not for me.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, for another reason.
5
SPEAKER_01
Or for that reason, but you should know it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Right, right.
5
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s so funny.
5
SPEAKER_01
That was great.
5
SPEAKER_01
Thank you, Anthony, for writing it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, fun, fun, fun, fun.
5
SPEAKER_01
OK.
5
SPEAKER_01
Body Image and Clothing Confidence.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is from Britt.
5
SPEAKER_01
Hi, Monica and Liz.
5
SPEAKER_01
First of all, I love the show and look forward to it weekly.
5
SPEAKER_01
My question is about body image and body confidence.
5
SPEAKER_01
I ve struggled with body image issues since high school, and it affects how I dress even.
5
SPEAKER_01
For example, I won t wear tight clothing unless I look and feel my absolute best.
5
SPEAKER_01
Flat stomach, no jiggling at all in the hips, et cetera, which is rare.
5
SPEAKER_01
Do you ever struggle with how your body looks in clothes or advice on how to let that go?
5
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes I won t even let my husband see my naked body if I feel I look gross.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m in therapy, but I just have such a high standard for myself based on society s standards growing up and can t seem to rid my brain of them.
5
SPEAKER_01
Thank you for any advice you have.
5
SPEAKER_01
I think this is so relatable.
5
SPEAKER_01
Totally.
5
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes I hate the way my body looks in certain clothes and sort of like the makeup thing, what we were talking about, where I was like, I m just going to wear this white person makeup anyway.
5
SPEAKER_01
I do that with clothes.
5
SPEAKER_01
If I like it on the rack, it s not like ill-fitting, but I think my boobs look too big in it or something, something about my body I don t love.
5
SPEAKER_01
I ll normally just get it.
5
SPEAKER_01
wear it because I like it.
5
SPEAKER_01
I like picking it out.
5
SPEAKER_01
I like putting it on.
5
SPEAKER_01
And it s helped a lot of that where I m not trying to find the perfect clothes for my body.
5
SPEAKER_01
And by the way, this is like horrible styling advice.
5
SPEAKER_01
I have to say, like every stylist would say, pick clothes that work well with your body.
5
SPEAKER_01
But if you are actively looking to uncouple a connection in your brain, I think this is a good way to do it.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s just sort of like, I don t give a fuck.
5
SPEAKER_01
I m wearing this thing that accentuates a part of my body that I don t love.
5
SPEAKER_01
And how do I feel throughout the day?
5
SPEAKER_01
At the end of the day, did I survive it?
5
SPEAKER_01
Did people still smile at me and laugh and engage with me?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_01
So it s sort of like immersion therapy in some ways.
5
SPEAKER_00
I have like the opposite advice that s so good though, because I do love that.
5
SPEAKER_00
I think that s the right thing to do.
5
SPEAKER_00
And like anything, there s no fix, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
It s like something you have to try different things for.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I had the privilege of getting to work with a stylist when I was at Vox, right?
5
SPEAKER_00
And that was something that is not possible for most people.
5
SPEAKER_00
But you can also get, like, cheap stylists.
5
SPEAKER_00
There are virtual stylists.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, my best friend just did this, and it was so great.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s not like you have to, like, shell out so much money, but to have someone
5
SPEAKER_00
Actually, because so often, I mean, there is nothing wrong with your body.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s that the clothes— Oh, did he call you back?
5
SPEAKER_01
Anthony sent this, um, gif or whatever.
5
SPEAKER_01
Hold on, I m gonna call him again.
5
SPEAKER_01
And we ll pin.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes, yes, yes.
5
SPEAKER_01
He s so afraid.
5
SPEAKER_01
Don t write— He s so afraid.
5
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
5
SPEAKER_01
Don t write in and not be prepared for the consequences.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, back to styling.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, yes.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, because I got like a virtual designer for my little apartment.
5
SPEAKER_00
It was like I think $40 a room or something.
5
SPEAKER_00
Like it s really, really affordable.
5
SPEAKER_00
There s a lot of things out there.
5
SPEAKER_00
And it looks as good as like having an amazing designer come into your home and do the whole thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
So that would be my first thing.
5
SPEAKER_00
And look, I have really small boobs.
5
SPEAKER_00
And for a really long time, I would do what you said, which I would be like, this dress looks amazing.
5
SPEAKER_00
But then I would get it.
5
SPEAKER_00
And yeah, it would just not be the right fit for my body.
5
SPEAKER_00
And after a while, I realized like, it s not about what my body looks like.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s about the clothes that I m putting on that then like primes me to think that there s something to focus on that part when there s nothing wrong with that part.
5
SPEAKER_00
Instead of devesting from, like, it doesn t matter what you look like, like, invest in yourself.
5
SPEAKER_00
If that s something that s important to you and that you want to feel good in, because you deserve to feel good and feel amazing about yourself.
5
SPEAKER_01
I know.
5
SPEAKER_01
This is weird because they re both options and I think they re opposite and I think they re both potentially effective.
5
SPEAKER_00
And wait, one last thing is your husband doesn t give a fuck.
5
SPEAKER_00
I think that that part,
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, oh, well, well, well, look who decided to show up.
5
SPEAKER_01
Am I on air right now?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yep.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_01
I do not, I do not condone to being on air.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, when you do something rascally, it comes back to you.
5
SPEAKER_01
First of all, I m sorry if your feelings were hurt by your shout out, but I did keep you anonymous and you have now outed yourself.
6
SPEAKER_02
So congratulations.
6
SPEAKER_02
And I have a follow-up.
6
SPEAKER_00
Go on.
6
SPEAKER_02
So your question is, do I need to apologize for telling my friend I didn t listen to their podcast?
6
SPEAKER_02
No.
6
SPEAKER_02
You never need to apologize for that.
6
SPEAKER_02
But that s not really what we were talking about, right?
6
SPEAKER_02
We were saying, why?
6
SPEAKER_02
And you have not answered that.
6
SPEAKER_02
And I m curious.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s not about listening.
6
SPEAKER_02
You don t have to listen to anything, and you know that, and I think, I hope.
6
SPEAKER_01
Apparently not.
6
SPEAKER_02
No, it s if you listen to four out of five, what is it about the fifth?
6
SPEAKER_02
And by the way, it can be just like, you guys have, voices suck, or you re grading, or I don t, I could be.
6
SPEAKER_02
a million options.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m just asking you to ask yourself why.
6
SPEAKER_02
Which, by the way, and I already said this because you didn t answer, so we talked about it.
6
SPEAKER_02
I know that you already did this, which is why you then listened.
6
SPEAKER_02
Or did Allison tell you?
6
SPEAKER_02
Be honest.
6
SPEAKER_01
Alison did tell me.
6
SPEAKER_01
Alison listens.
6
SPEAKER_01
Big fan.
6
SPEAKER_01
Shout out to Alison, everybody.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_02
Love Alison.
6
SPEAKER_02
Love her.
6
SPEAKER_02
She loves me.
6
SPEAKER_01
But no, I was going to listen to this one because I was listening to another spoke of the umbrella.
6
SPEAKER_01
The one where you talked about everything going on with your grandpa, the fact check.
6
SPEAKER_01
That was a little wonky, that one.
6
SPEAKER_01
There s a lot of other things going on.
6
SPEAKER_01
I didn t see in this episode.
6
SPEAKER_01
It was like, Monica talks about her grandpa.
6
SPEAKER_01
I was like, oh, I should
6
SPEAKER_02
I see.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yes, because you re a wonderful friend, which you are.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m not taking that away from you.
6
SPEAKER_02
You re the best.
6
SPEAKER_02
And also, why don t you like this show?
6
SPEAKER_02
I do not dislike this show.
6
SPEAKER_02
This is good for the world, what you re doing, Anthony.
6
SPEAKER_02
It is.
6
SPEAKER_02
I appreciate it.
6
SPEAKER_00
I really, I don t want to be, I do not want to be on this podcast.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, why d you write in?
6
SPEAKER_02
Everyone can write in.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, if you write in and you know me, you re probably going to get called.
6
SPEAKER_02
Also, I made it clear and I m making it clear again.
6
SPEAKER_02
You are a feminist.
6
SPEAKER_02
I am not.
6
SPEAKER_02
You are.
6
SPEAKER_01
I ve heard all that.
6
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
6
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if the parenthetical was right, but it was all meant in good fun.
6
SPEAKER_02
All right.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, do you listen now or?
6
SPEAKER_00
No.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, OK.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s fine.
6
SPEAKER_02
I guess you re just not going to tell us why.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s maybe OK.
6
SPEAKER_02
I guess I just want you to know.
6
SPEAKER_01
My goal is to make this the least compelling content in this moment.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I do not end up on this podcast.
6
SPEAKER_02
Wait, what?
6
SPEAKER_01
I am going to be the least compelling version of myself right now.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I do not end up on this podcast.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, so far it s pretty compelling.
6
SPEAKER_02
Pretty good.
6
SPEAKER_01
Hello, Liz.
6
SPEAKER_01
Hello, Rob.
6
SPEAKER_01
Hi, Anthony.
6
SPEAKER_01
I hope everyone is doing well.
6
SPEAKER_02
We re doing great.
6
SPEAKER_02
We do appreciate you.
6
SPEAKER_02
I can t speak for them, but I do.
6
SPEAKER_02
I love that you listen to all of our shows.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s very flattering.
6
SPEAKER_02
All but one, but it s all very flattering.
6
SPEAKER_02
And thanks for writing in.
6
SPEAKER_01
No problem.
6
SPEAKER_01
Thanks.
6
SPEAKER_01
I can t wait to listen to hear what you guys have to say about my question.
6
SPEAKER_02
Okay, bye.
6
SPEAKER_01
I ll have Allison tell me which episode.
6
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, fuck you.
6
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
6
SPEAKER_02
God.
6
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, we didn t really get it.
6
SPEAKER_02
We did not.
6
SPEAKER_02
He wasn t going to give us anything, but he is making it on the show.
6
SPEAKER_02
I m leaving a lot of that in.
6
SPEAKER_03
Okay, now.
6
SPEAKER_03
Dax actually has kind of helped me with this.
6
SPEAKER_03
Like, Dax randomly, like, once had a conversation with me where he was just, like, I mean, his whole circles thing.
6
SPEAKER_03
He s like, guys just care about circles, like, that you don t need to be, like, you know, that women pay a lot more attention to and will be able to tell if they ve put on weight, but, like, men are not that focused on that.
6
SPEAKER_03
Even, like, I was watching, re-watching Friends, and obviously Jennifer Aniston is beautiful no matter what.
6
SPEAKER_03
But she, you know, progressively kind of loses weight throughout the show, honestly.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I found myself kind of, I don t know, maybe it s my age, maybe it s like the fact that I ve watched it like seven million times, but I was like, I like her when she s like at her most full.
6
SPEAKER_03
And again, she s Jennifer Aniston, like, but that kind of changed something in my head.
6
SPEAKER_03
Because I think maybe a few years ago, I still would have thought like, well, thinner is better.
6
SPEAKER_03
But like thinner is not better.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s such a false ranking that we ve created and definitely reinforced.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I think that is even more of a pressure on women to see themselves through that prism of how thin they are and like jiggly, like some of the words that brings up.
6
SPEAKER_03
And I just, yeah, I want us to see ourselves through a different lens and especially the part about her, you know, not wanting to be naked in front of her husband.
6
SPEAKER_03
Your husband is interested in your naked body no matter what.
6
SPEAKER_02
I agree.
6
SPEAKER_02
My approach of just wearing the thing that sometimes might accentuate the quote, jiggling in your hips, or like, my boobs look so big in this, and ugh, I don t love that.
6
SPEAKER_02
Because I m not going to change that.
6
SPEAKER_02
I could stress myself out to try to change it, or I could just accept
6
SPEAKER_02
these things about my body.
6
SPEAKER_02
And I guess for me, like, wearing the clothes that don t accentuate it is in a way hiding it.
6
SPEAKER_02
But I see both, depending on you and your mood and what you need that day.
6
SPEAKER_02
So my friend just did this virtual styling session, and she really loved it.
6
SPEAKER_02
And she just had a baby, so she s coming out of that.
6
SPEAKER_02
And she was like, I just want, like, a refresh.
6
SPEAKER_02
It was very cool.
6
SPEAKER_02
And the stylist gave her, like, just like two tips
6
SPEAKER_02
Like, I think you should wear more belts.
6
SPEAKER_02
Because you don t like this one thing, so maybe just like wear a belt.
6
SPEAKER_02
So even just something like that.
6
SPEAKER_02
Totally.
6
SPEAKER_03
And you end up saving money, by the way, because you re buying things that actually fit your body and that you love.
6
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_03
That s what I also didn t foresee with working with a stylist.
6
SPEAKER_03
And can I say one more thing?
6
SPEAKER_03
It s like, not to make everything about Taylor Swift, but watch her documentary.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I know.
6
SPEAKER_03
And watch, like, her transformation into, like, Taylor Swift now and just her aura and, like, everything about her life and, like, when she was at her thinnest.
6
SPEAKER_03
what was going on.
6
SPEAKER_03
And examining her body.
6
SPEAKER_03
Yes, and just like, thinner s not better, man.
6
SPEAKER_03
It s like, it s just a false ideal that s pushed onto us to just make us miserable about the way that we are right now, when like, loving your body should be the goal, not changing it.
6
SPEAKER_03
accepting it.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s keeping you alive.
6
SPEAKER_02
There s only one.
6
SPEAKER_02
It s very special.
6
SPEAKER_02
But it s also hard.
6
SPEAKER_02
We all struggle with this.
6
SPEAKER_02
Totally.
6
SPEAKER_02
But those are some options of things to do.
6
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, we ran out of time, but we have a lot of good questions for next week.
6
SPEAKER_02
We do.
6
SPEAKER_00
Those were great.
6
SPEAKER_02
Well, yes, abroad, Japan.
6
SPEAKER_02
Coming your way.
6
SPEAKER_02
And then we also have our horrible challenges coming up soon as well.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, God.
6
SPEAKER_02
Oh, and update on that.
6
SPEAKER_02
We ve said it s totally fine.
6
SPEAKER_02
Liz is going to pivot.
6
SPEAKER_02
She s not going to do My Tears Ricochet.
6
SPEAKER_02
She s going to do Blank Space, which is great.
6
SPEAKER_02
Sad.
6
SPEAKER_03
Make it sad.
6
SPEAKER_03
Oh, she s going to do Blank Space sad.
6
SPEAKER_03
Because Rob wanted it to be a sad song, so I m making it sad.
6
SPEAKER_03
I m still sticking to it.
6
SPEAKER_03
I m just modifying.
6
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, which is great.
6
SPEAKER_03
Everything s great.
6
SPEAKER_02
All right, we ll see you next week.
6
SPEAKER_02
Bye.
6
SPEAKER_02
Bye, Anthony.