0
SPEAKER_02
What if I m like Anna Wintour now?
0
SPEAKER_00
And you only, you always wear shades inside.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
That ll I think diminish our connection when we talk a little bit.
0
SPEAKER_00
That s great.
0
SPEAKER_00
But I can t see your eyes at all.
0
SPEAKER_00
So I don t, and I get a lot of info from you.
0
SPEAKER_00
Welcome, welcome, welcome to armchair expert.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m Dan Shepard and we re mid conversation with Monica Padman.
0
SPEAKER_00
Please continue.
0
SPEAKER_02
I m just wondering if I should maybe adopt an Anna Wintour, now that I have Jacques-Marie Mage sunglasses.
0
SPEAKER_00
Second intro in a row.
0
SPEAKER_02
Maybe I wear them all the time.
0
SPEAKER_02
And you said that you didn t think you d connect with me.
0
SPEAKER_00
No, we should keep it in the beginning.
0
SPEAKER_00
I don t think you need to catch everyone up.
0
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wow.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it ll be our first ever BTS intro.
0
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
0
SPEAKER_00
Do we agree on that creatively?
0
SPEAKER_00
Could be fun.
0
SPEAKER_00
This is what a lot of the guests on Armchair Anonymous experience, like we re signing on, we re waiting for their audio to connect, and we are mid, mid heated debate conversation.
0
SPEAKER_00
And they hear.
0
SPEAKER_02
They get in on it.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they drop right in the middle of it.
0
SPEAKER_00
Today s guest was so fun.
0
SPEAKER_00
I didn t see this coming for no reason.
0
SPEAKER_00
I had no negative opinions.
0
SPEAKER_00
I just didn t.
0
SPEAKER_00
I couldn t have anticipated what an absolute riot this would be.
0
SPEAKER_02
Oh, she s a gem.
0
SPEAKER_00
She s an absolute gem.
0
SPEAKER_00
Heidi Klum, a supermodel, television host, producer, and a hardcore businesswoman.
0
SPEAKER_00
Her credits include Project Runway, which ran for 65 years.
0
SPEAKER_00
Loved it.
0
SPEAKER_00
Germany s Next Top Model, year 85.
0
SPEAKER_00
America s Got Talent, season 20,000.
0
SPEAKER_00
And she is here to promote a new season, AGT Fantasy League.
0
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
Where they get to actually pick the acts that they want to support, and it s kind of a shootout.
0
SPEAKER_00
That airs Mondays on NBC and the next day on Peacock.
0
SPEAKER_00
You know, get ready to pee your pants.
0
SPEAKER_00
We got a little pushback on a recent Armchair Anonymous, because we said you could listen to it, and they said you should have worn for crying, which is fair.
0
SPEAKER_00
The Paralympian athlete.
0
SPEAKER_02
That s not what we warn about.
0
SPEAKER_00
I know.
0
SPEAKER_02
They need to know that.
0
SPEAKER_00
But I guess in response to that, I think a warning, you might piddle your pants listening to this one.
0
SPEAKER_02
Oh, you think there might be some piddles?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so if you re like, you have a weak bladder, incontinent, you know, just be mindful to evac before this episode.
0
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_02
You should work on your pelvic floor if that is the case for you.
0
SPEAKER_00
We just don t have time to get back into that one.
0
SPEAKER_00
Please enjoy Heidi Klum.
0
SPEAKER_02
♪ He s an armchair spy ♪
0
SPEAKER_02
He s an Archer expert He s an Archer expert
0
SPEAKER_02
What are we congratulating?
0
SPEAKER_00
Can we offer you something to drink?
0
SPEAKER_00
Would you like a coffee?
0
SPEAKER_00
We have water.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, I don t drink any more coffee.
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, good for you.
0
SPEAKER_01
This was my New Year s resolution.
0
SPEAKER_00
No.
0
SPEAKER_01
I got to hear all about it.
0
SPEAKER_01
I need to drink more water.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t love it.
0
SPEAKER_00
I don t like water either.
0
SPEAKER_00
My New Year s resolution was no water.
0
SPEAKER_02
For the past six years.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, because I never drink water.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
You don t drink water.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, I hate it.
0
SPEAKER_01
But I ve been trying to drink it more.
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh, so we get to get squished in the corner.
0
SPEAKER_01
You guys have the recliner.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s cozy.
0
SPEAKER_01
I just sat there for... This recliner my grandmother had, literally.
0
SPEAKER_01
My grandmother, who I would always drink schnapps with.
0
SPEAKER_00
Peppermint schnapps or something cinnamony?
0
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_00
Schnapps is big in Germany, yeah?
0
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
And people mix it with shit, right?
0
SPEAKER_00
Like Coke?
0
SPEAKER_01
No, it would either be like a plum or a pear.
0
SPEAKER_00
I like that.
0
SPEAKER_01
And when you drink it, you know, you have the fruit in your schnapps and then usually there s like a little toothpick with a little flag on it and then you would rub the fruit, put a little fruit in your mouth, chew around on it, put it down the hatch and then you put the fruit down.
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh my gosh, it s a whole ritual.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s a lot of pageantry.
0
SPEAKER_01
So when you buy the pear with the schnapps, it s already in the bottle.
0
SPEAKER_01
So everyone is like, how does the big pear get into this bottle?
0
SPEAKER_01
But literally what they do is they hang those bottles on the tree and then they grow in the bottle.
0
SPEAKER_00
What a genius idea.
0
SPEAKER_01
I want that.
0
SPEAKER_00
Did you feel laser beam by her eyes just now when she was making direct eye contact with you?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
But it s, no, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s just because I don t see well.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t have my glasses on.
0
SPEAKER_00
I m like a mole.
0
SPEAKER_00
You and Monica have two things in common I detected already in my research.
0
SPEAKER_00
Both of your eyes are useless.
0
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
My eyes are also bad.
0
SPEAKER_01
And I m a judge.
0
SPEAKER_01
Let s cut that out.
0
SPEAKER_00
You can see perfectly.
0
SPEAKER_01
I can sort of feel the act.
0
SPEAKER_00
What if all the judges were normal and they panned you and you had fucking binoculars watching them?
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, that s why I always sit there with binoculars.
0
SPEAKER_01
You do?
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, that was a joke.
0
SPEAKER_00
No.
0
SPEAKER_00
You re using binoculars on this show.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yes, always.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay, back to Germany.
0
SPEAKER_00
You know Opel.
0
SPEAKER_00
You grew up around Opel, the car company.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I know.
0
SPEAKER_00
I used to work with them.
0
SPEAKER_00
And whenever the German technicians would come into town and we would all be hanging out, they did a lot of curious things around drinking.
0
SPEAKER_00
They combined their Coca-Cola with wine.
0
SPEAKER_00
They combined Coca-Cola with beer sometimes.
0
SPEAKER_00
They put potato chips in their beer.
0
SPEAKER_01
I love beer with lemonade.
0
SPEAKER_01
Or beer with Coca-Cola.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s very good.
0
SPEAKER_01
Do you see?
0
SPEAKER_00
You thought I d been lying.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, you mix or you take a sip and then you take a sip?
0
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
0
SPEAKER_00
You mix it.
0
SPEAKER_00
You mix beer and Coca-Cola?
0
SPEAKER_00
The Germans got Coca-Cola?
0
SPEAKER_01
I mean, for me, beer is like mother s milk.
0
SPEAKER_01
Liquid gold.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s like a meal.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, it has hops and all that stuff in it.
0
SPEAKER_01
Nutrients.
0
SPEAKER_00
For you, it s sustenance.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s a good word that I don t know.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_00
Wie viel kostet dein Pulli?
0
SPEAKER_01
Wie teuer?
0
SPEAKER_01
Sehr viel.
0
SPEAKER_01
Weil das ist Kaschmir.
0
SPEAKER_01
Ganz dickes Kaschmir.
0
SPEAKER_01
Das ist ganz teuer.
0
SPEAKER_01
See, because now she answered about her sweater.
0
SPEAKER_00
I know.
0
SPEAKER_00
Because I always ask people how much their pullover is, but it never makes sense.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, this one is expensive because it s Kaschmir.
0
SPEAKER_01
So Jennifer Love in my office, who s been working with me, I want to say 19 years now, maybe could be 20.
0
SPEAKER_00
Heidi, different than the Jennifer Love actress we know?
0
SPEAKER_01
Jennifer Love Hewitt is who you re thinking.
0
SPEAKER_01
Not Hewitt, just Love.
0
SPEAKER_01
I shouldn t say just, but it s Love.
0
SPEAKER_01
I ve been working with her and she listens to you guys religiously.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s nice.
0
SPEAKER_01
So she told me that we re going to sit in your attic.
0
SPEAKER_01
Is this going to be bad for the sound?
0
SPEAKER_01
What is it?
0
SPEAKER_01
I heard something pop up.
0
SPEAKER_00
Everyone s so used to it.
0
SPEAKER_00
My wife s going down into the gym to probably blast her buns.
0
SPEAKER_01
Oh.
0
SPEAKER_00
Would you like to go watch?
0
SPEAKER_00
for a second and return?
0
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
Take a little pause.
0
SPEAKER_01
I can maybe pick up a few ideas.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, but she told me that we re going to be sitting in your attic and that it s cold.
0
SPEAKER_00
Do you find it to be cold right now?
0
SPEAKER_00
No, not at all.
0
SPEAKER_00
So what you re telling me, and I m flattered, is that this outfit is intentional because you were fearing the environment would be frigid.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_02
I know why she says that, because she does listen, and I m always cold in here.
0
SPEAKER_00
But Monica s cold in the sauna.
0
SPEAKER_00
We were in the sauna on Saturday for 28 minutes, and she didn t have one bead of sweat.
0
SPEAKER_00
I did.
0
SPEAKER_00
It s her Indian blood.
0
SPEAKER_01
I don t sweat either.
0
SPEAKER_01
Really?
0
SPEAKER_01
No.
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, we re the same.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s because we don t drink water.
0
SPEAKER_01
I know.
0
SPEAKER_01
We did just start with that.
0
SPEAKER_01
You need to have liquid in order for it to come out.
0
SPEAKER_01
I know.
0
SPEAKER_00
I gotta remember the second thing.
0
SPEAKER_00
There was another thing, because I think it s funny, and I immediately was like, oh, that s Monica.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you said there were two things.
0
SPEAKER_00
There s two things, I m confident it ll come to me throughout this conversation, but there s another really good one.
0
SPEAKER_02
Is it about sweaters?
0
SPEAKER_02
I m also wearing a big sweater.
0
SPEAKER_00
No, but now they re coming hot and fast, because we know about the sweaters, we know about the being cold, we know about the not sweating.
0
SPEAKER_01
I can tell my face not to sweat.
0
SPEAKER_01
Can you do that?
0
SPEAKER_01
I ve never tried but I m gonna try.
0
SPEAKER_01
No because I have to sometimes because when I m working you don t want powder on top of powder or the same way when it s cold like yesterday went to the Golden Globes and everyone is like shivering it was freezing but then when we go on to the red carpet where they take your photos I can totally make them go back in also.
0
SPEAKER_01
Really?
0
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
0
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, everyone looked pretty uncomfortable.
0
SPEAKER_01
No, but I can literally do that with my brain.
0
SPEAKER_01
I tell my sweat glands in my face not to come out and they won t.
0
SPEAKER_01
So then I will sweat profusely under my armpit, but no one can see it there.
0
SPEAKER_01
So I do it only in places where no one can see it.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s magical.
0
SPEAKER_01
It is magical.
0
SPEAKER_00
Is this something you practice or just discovered you could do?
0
SPEAKER_01
I discovered, I guess also because people are like, wow, you never sweat.
0
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, well, I tell myself, I guess not to sweat.
0
SPEAKER_01
I have a question about your sweat.
0
SPEAKER_01
When you do sweat, does it smell?
0
SPEAKER_01
Well, when I m nervous, it s terrible.
0
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
0
SPEAKER_01
That s common for people.
0
SPEAKER_01
When I m nervous, it is so bad that I m constantly checking around.
0
SPEAKER_01
I m like, do you smell this?
0
SPEAKER_01
Because I smell myself.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s so bad.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s a type of like pheromone getting released.
0
SPEAKER_01
I ve heard about this.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s terrible.
0
SPEAKER_01
But also I eat, I don t know, one whole entire bulb of garlic every week raw.
0
SPEAKER_01
It could also have something to do with that.
0
SPEAKER_00
And the no water back to no water.
0
SPEAKER_00
So the stuff that s coming out of you is like the last bit of moisture.
0
SPEAKER_01
It s not good.
0
SPEAKER_01
Guys, whoever is listening to this, don t try this at home.
0
SPEAKER_01
Drink your water two liters a day.
0
SPEAKER_00
Take your garlic sparingly.
0
SPEAKER_00
The cautionary tale.
0
SPEAKER_00
I love that you figured that out, though.
0
SPEAKER_00
What a breakthrough.
0
SPEAKER_00
The moment you re like, oh wait, I have total control over my face sweat glands.
0
SPEAKER_01
Talented.
0
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so I ve figured something out already in just this first five minutes of meeting you, because you wonder to yourself, how on earth does someone become a supermodel?
0
SPEAKER_00
What is this?
0
SPEAKER_00
Tons of people are pretty, and for you, and I know you already know this about yourself,
0
SPEAKER_00
Your eyes have many different shapes and you re in total control of them.
0
SPEAKER_00
You can smile with them, you can do a lot with them.
0
SPEAKER_00
Would you agree?
0
SPEAKER_02
Very dynamic, yeah.
0
SPEAKER_00
Yes, this is the quintessential ingredient.
1
SPEAKER_01
eyes.
1
SPEAKER_01
Is there anything else you can see?
1
SPEAKER_00
And this is how big of a compliment to your eyes I m going to give.
1
SPEAKER_00
They re so dynamic that if you were nude, I m not even sure I would check anything out.
1
SPEAKER_00
I have no problem with nudity at all.
1
SPEAKER_00
She s a nudist.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you are.
1
SPEAKER_01
I am.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, I grew up nude around my house with my parents being nude and us going on vacations where it s FKK, which is Freie Körper Kultur, which means the freedom of your body.
1
SPEAKER_01
Körper is, I guess, corpse.
1
SPEAKER_01
Körper, corpse.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
That Latin, yeah, corpus.
1
SPEAKER_01
And Kultur is culture.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s how I grew up.
1
SPEAKER_01
We would go on vacations with our trailer or tenting in FKK vacation places.
1
SPEAKER_01
And so I would always see people nude on the beach, nude swimming.
1
SPEAKER_01
So I grew up on that.
1
SPEAKER_01
For me, that was never weird.
1
SPEAKER_00
You can t go back.
1
SPEAKER_00
You can t all of a sudden be modest about it.
1
SPEAKER_01
I am living here or going to places, obviously, where you can t be nude.
1
SPEAKER_01
Always follow the rules.
1
SPEAKER_00
But mentally, you can t make yourself all of a sudden self-conscious.
1
SPEAKER_00
You already grew up that way.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
OK, we are going to do a lot on Germany because I m obsessed with Germany.
1
SPEAKER_01
You are?
1
SPEAKER_00
I am.
1
SPEAKER_00
The food?
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, I love the bread and the butter.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s the best butter in the world and the soups are so good.
1
SPEAKER_00
The cleanliness, everything runs on time.
1
SPEAKER_00
You re in a 600-year-old village and it s somehow cleaner than the city we built two years ago.
1
SPEAKER_00
There s so many things to be fascinated.
1
SPEAKER_00
The engineering, I m a gearhead, but...
1
SPEAKER_00
My first trip there, I was with my mother at 16.
1
SPEAKER_00
I wanted to drive on the Autobahn.
1
SPEAKER_00
We were staying at a hotel and I was like, I m going to go swimming.
1
SPEAKER_00
She wasn t in the mood, went down and went swimming.
1
SPEAKER_00
Then I m like, I m going to hop in that sauna.
1
SPEAKER_00
Got in the sauna, everyone bare naked.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, it s a sauna.
1
SPEAKER_00
But not here at a hotel swimming pool.
1
SPEAKER_00
So I, because I m a pervert, I left, took off my shorts and came back.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then I sat there at 16 bare naked.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, oh my God, this is the most thrilling thing.
1
SPEAKER_00
I had to talk myself out of getting an erection, as you would imagine.
1
SPEAKER_00
I was so excited.
1
SPEAKER_01
And could you do that?
1
SPEAKER_00
I was able to keep it, you know.
1
SPEAKER_01
See, you have the power too.
1
SPEAKER_01
Not quite as, or maybe more impressive actually.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like I have with my Swiss ones.
1
SPEAKER_00
But also then as a 19 year old went there with my girlfriend for a couple months and yeah, you go to a public park in the middle of Frankfurt and you re on the grass and you look around and many of the families are bare naked.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you see a lot of topless people.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s standard.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then a lot of just straight up full nude.
1
SPEAKER_01
I just came back from St.
1
SPEAKER_01
Barts.
1
SPEAKER_01
We were there for two weeks, my husband and I, because the kids went with their dad to England and it was a French island.
1
SPEAKER_01
I can t wait to take my top off.
1
SPEAKER_01
And it s literally not a sexy thing or like a sexual thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s a freedom thing for me also because I don t want to have tan lines.
1
SPEAKER_01
And there is also a feeling of the sun going on your full body instead of having something on.
1
SPEAKER_01
I know maybe it sounds stupid or when you go in the water and you swim, you have a certain kind of sensation.
1
SPEAKER_01
And again, it s not a sexual sensation, but it s very freeing.
1
SPEAKER_00
the breeze is now tickling every part of your body as the wind blows by.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s also much nicer without any clothes on.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, everything is much nicer without clothes.
1
SPEAKER_00
Except for like working in a coal mine.
1
SPEAKER_01
Or a fire.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
But you know, on this beach too, there were so many
1
SPEAKER_01
couples, like an older couple.
1
SPEAKER_01
I want to say they were maybe in their late 60s.
1
SPEAKER_01
Husband and wife, they were laying on the beach with nothing on.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then there was a gay couple on the other side that were just reading there and having their lunch on their blankie.
1
SPEAKER_01
There s like no shame.
1
SPEAKER_01
And is there any fear?
1
SPEAKER_00
I was just going to ask you.
1
SPEAKER_00
The fear of what?
1
SPEAKER_00
Predators.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, not that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Creepy crawlies going crazy.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, she meant sexual predators.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I did.
1
SPEAKER_00
But also that.
1
SPEAKER_00
Before we get to sexual predators, you are famous.
1
SPEAKER_00
And so if you re nude on the beach.
1
SPEAKER_01
I have a bottom on.
1
SPEAKER_00
I know, but topless, there s people with cell phone covers.
1
SPEAKER_01
People take photos.
1
SPEAKER_00
They do.
1
SPEAKER_00
And you just go, fuck it, whatever.
1
SPEAKER_01
I feel like you have to be who you are.
1
SPEAKER_01
I agree.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m not doing anything wrong.
1
SPEAKER_01
I m going to a place where you re allowed to.
1
SPEAKER_01
Also, I m not where there is like thousands of people and I m just like, woohoo.
1
SPEAKER_01
So you park your car, you go down the trail and then there is the beach.
1
SPEAKER_01
We go to the furthest part.
1
SPEAKER_01
Most people that go and they want to sit right there where it s easy.
1
SPEAKER_01
We always walk another half a mile where there is nobody and maybe like three other people.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then I feel like, OK.
1
SPEAKER_00
You make an effort and then you go, my fear of whatever happening, I m not going to let it ruin my life.
1
SPEAKER_01
And also I feel like in most places it s not allowed, so then they put a sticker over your breasts in any case, so they don t show it.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s a good point, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Certainly not on Instagram, you won t be able to show it.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s where we re all seeing all of our... In Germany they would show it without censor it, but here they would probably put a sticker on the nipples.
1
SPEAKER_01
They re very afraid of areolas and nipples.
1
SPEAKER_01
They are, truly.
1
SPEAKER_00
But like women s... Men s are fine.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they re fine.
1
SPEAKER_02
But do you think, again, to be a little generous, do you think part of it is this fear that it ll get used for...
1
SPEAKER_00
Masturbatory?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, like sexual predators.
1
SPEAKER_00
You mean that, okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
The question is, do you fear men will look at them?
1
SPEAKER_00
Is that what you re asking?
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, but mixed in, was there ever fear of that?
1
SPEAKER_02
Because you were young when you were out.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh.
1
SPEAKER_02
It d be like if you took the girls.
1
SPEAKER_00
Okay, so this is great.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m so glad you just took it here.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because what is so fascinating is I think it is our puritanical nature that actually makes us perverse.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I actually agree.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t think you have the same problem in Germany.
1
SPEAKER_00
with creeps fucking walking around cameras and trying to get pictures.
1
SPEAKER_01
In general, I think that there s bad people everywhere as there are good people everywhere.
1
SPEAKER_01
So who knows what people do when they see a photo?
1
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes people, they see a toe.
1
SPEAKER_01
Now people are really into feet.
1
SPEAKER_01
I know there s a whole wiki.
1
SPEAKER_01
I do a lot of questionnaires on Instagram because I have all my functions turned off.
1
SPEAKER_01
So sometimes I will do like, ask me a question.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then a lot of people are always like, show us the feet, show us the soles of your feet, show the toes, go closer.
1
SPEAKER_01
And so who knows what people are doing with that?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s my foot.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t care.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
What they re doing when they re looking at those photos.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t either.
1
SPEAKER_00
Monica and I have had this conversation independently in the past, and I m like, if a guy s masturbating to me in a movie, I don t care.
1
SPEAKER_00
I guess I m kind of flattered by it.
1
SPEAKER_00
It doesn t bother me.
1
SPEAKER_01
I also don t think about it.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I think maybe that s smart.
1
SPEAKER_02
But I m surprised you don t think about it, because I feel like models, it s so forward facing, the aesthetics.
1
SPEAKER_00
She couldn t have been hung up about it and then been an angel for 13 years.
1
SPEAKER_00
She would have had to have gotten past all that.
1
SPEAKER_01
I would have gone topless down the runway.
1
SPEAKER_01
I would have not bothered me.
1
SPEAKER_00
Do you ever, when you re at Disneyland and go on the log ride and the flume, will you remove your top because it s water oriented?
1
SPEAKER_01
I m scared to go down that log.
1
SPEAKER_01
I don t like going on those types of things.
1
SPEAKER_01
I go with my kids, but that s as far as I would go down.
1
SPEAKER_01
That other hoopty hoopty thing that I will not do.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like, I m scared of those things.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s fair.
1
SPEAKER_01
How many times have you been there and people are stuck up there and then you see them walking down on the sides and you re like, yeah, no, I m not doing that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh my god, I ve never seen this.
1
SPEAKER_00
She sees it every time she goes.
1
SPEAKER_01
We ll have four kids, so we go all the time.
1
SPEAKER_00
Listen, if you re at a Disney or any amusement park and you see Heidi, do not ride the roller coaster because it s going to break and she s going to witness it.
1
SPEAKER_00
Back to Germany.
1
SPEAKER_00
You were there till 1892?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then I went to New York.
1
SPEAKER_00
Virtually the same age.
1
SPEAKER_00
Before we get to New York.
1
SPEAKER_01
I was born in June 73.
1
SPEAKER_01
And you?
1
SPEAKER_00
January, two, eins, zwei, zwei.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh boy, this is gonna be long.
1
SPEAKER_00
I can t say 1975.
1
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so I m older than you.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but by a minute.
1
SPEAKER_00
Scheiße, by two years.
1
SPEAKER_00
Scheiße, that s shit in German.
1
SPEAKER_01
I knew that s the only one I know.
1
Okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
Ich bin sehr glücklich.
1
SPEAKER_00
I took it in ninth grade for one semester in high school and these are the five things I remember.
1
SPEAKER_00
How to count to 11, how much is the pullover, when s your birthday, wann hast du dein Geburtstag?
1
SPEAKER_00
What do you miss about Germany?
1
SPEAKER_00
You obviously love it here.
1
SPEAKER_00
I ve heard you talk about it.
1
SPEAKER_00
But what things do you miss?
1
SPEAKER_01
I mean, not enough in order for me to go back there.
1
SPEAKER_01
I love living in America and being here.
1
SPEAKER_01
And I would love to have my family here.
1
SPEAKER_01
My parents are there.
1
SPEAKER_01
My brother is there with his wife, his two kids.
1
SPEAKER_01
They just had a baby, too.
1
SPEAKER_01
So you miss all of that, obviously.
1
SPEAKER_01
But other than that, I love it here more.
1
SPEAKER_01
That s why I never went back.
1
SPEAKER_00
But when you go home, what s the thing you re most excited about?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, oh, I gotta get the pretzel bread.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, I love Knödel, which is a potato dumpling.
1
SPEAKER_01
So it s made out of potatoes.
1
SPEAKER_01
In my family, they would shred the potatoes, put an egg in it, salt.
1
SPEAKER_01
First, it goes into like a pillowcase.
1
SPEAKER_01
They put all that mush into the pillowcase, close it, and then it goes into the dryer.
1
SPEAKER_01
And from spinning of the dryer, all the juice of the kids  nuts, all the water from the potato comes out because of it.
1
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then it s like this is more of a mush.
1
SPEAKER_01
And then you mush them together.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can also put a little sausage in the middle or you could just do them like that and then you boil them in water.
1
SPEAKER_01
I feel like a lot of our listeners are going to go home and try this in their dryer.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m going to try it tonight.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m going to ruin our dryer by packing it full of potatoes.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, I mean, people put like sneakers into the washing machine or whatever they put in that poor washing machine.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can also make your potato dumplings in the dryer.
1
SPEAKER_01
That sounds really good.
1
SPEAKER_00
In 1992, well, no, no, first mom s a hairdresser and dad is an executive at a cosmetics company.
1
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
1
SPEAKER_01
I started with makeup and all of that stuff at a very early age.
1
SPEAKER_01
I did also my, how do you call that?
1
SPEAKER_01
It s practicum in German.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s like when you have for three weeks, you have to do a job.
1
SPEAKER_01
Like an internship?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, like an internship type of a thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s mandatory.
2
SPEAKER_00
mandatory in school.
2
SPEAKER_00
An apprenticeship?
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_01
We don t have that, unfortunately.
2
SPEAKER_01
They should have that here because it s great.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s mandatory.
2
SPEAKER_01
So for three weeks, you have to find a job.
2
SPEAKER_01
You want to take something that you actually like doing so you can really look into it.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I went where my dad was working and he had me do everything from being on the conveyor belt.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I see how the perfume is going into the bottle.
2
SPEAKER_01
He wanted me to see all the different
2
SPEAKER_01
kind of things that it entails to make a perfume or a compact powder or a cream or whatever it may be.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I watched the production of it all, then the marketing of it all.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know, let s say you wanted to make a perfume meeting with the noses.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I learned all the different types of things from beginning of wanting to make a product until it then goes into the stores.
2
SPEAKER_01
So for three weeks, he had me do all of this stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
But I feel like it s an enormous blessing as far as what you wanted to pursue to have a father who actually knows the value of a model and appreciates that line of work, as opposed to, I don t know, your mom and dad are the co-presidents of Yale and you go, I m going to be a model.
2
SPEAKER_00
And they re like, no, you re going to be an academic.
2
SPEAKER_00
I feel like this is almost the perfect set of parents for you to pursue this.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
Even though, you know, I entered this modeling competition, only my mom would go with me to this modeling competition.
2
SPEAKER_01
My dad was always like, she s not going to win this thing in any case.
2
SPEAKER_01
Like, just tell me how it went afterwards.
2
SPEAKER_01
It was a six months contest.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was going to ask, it s model 92, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
And there s 25,000 entrants.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I was like, how did they get through it all?
2
SPEAKER_00
What was the process?
2
SPEAKER_01
six months.
2
SPEAKER_01
My parents always traveled.
2
SPEAKER_01
I think they were in Thailand and I was alone and I was always actually with my grandmother, who I named my daughter after, Lainey.
2
SPEAKER_01
And so my friend was there and we go through this magazine and there was this coupon to enter this modeling competition.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m like, oh yeah, let s enter this modeling competition.
2
SPEAKER_01
So we just did some goofy photos, sent them in and then they said, come to a casting.
2
SPEAKER_01
And while my parents were gone, this all happened.
2
SPEAKER_01
I drove with my friend to Munich, which was a seven hour drive from my town.
2
SPEAKER_01
did this casting, there were hundreds of girls.
2
SPEAKER_01
I thought I was already kind of in this thing when they called me and they were like, no, this is a casting.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I was like, OK, what does that mean?
2
SPEAKER_01
And then you had to do an interview with them.
2
SPEAKER_01
They wanted to see even that you talk because it s a TV show that I entered.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s not just print.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
They want to know that you can actually open your mouth if someone asks you a question.
2
SPEAKER_00
Can I ask what is your confidence level?
2
SPEAKER_01
My confidence level was very low.
2
SPEAKER_00
And did your confidence throughout the competition build?
2
SPEAKER_00
Like it seems so implausible that you had never modeled, never done anything like this, entered this thing with so many people.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I danced.
2
SPEAKER_01
I was a dancer, so I was on stage all the time from that.
2
SPEAKER_01
My poor parents had to drive me to dance school like three times a week.
2
SPEAKER_01
You have how many daughters?
2
SPEAKER_00
Two.
2
SPEAKER_01
Do they do dance?
2
SPEAKER_00
Not officially.
2
SPEAKER_00
We dance as a family nonstop.
2
SPEAKER_00
We re a very big dancing family.
2
SPEAKER_00
But not any lessons.
2
SPEAKER_00
One s doing gymnastics.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, no, I loved it.
2
SPEAKER_01
I had to go three times a week.
2
SPEAKER_01
So they had to drive me constantly.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then we had competition.
2
SPEAKER_00
Ballet?
2
SPEAKER_01
I did all.
2
SPEAKER_01
I did belly dancing, ballroom dancing, jazz dancing.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then with my team, we would go into different towns because then you compete with all the different dance schools.
2
SPEAKER_00
This feels like AGT was made for you as a job because that was your childhood.
2
SPEAKER_00
You re virtually doing what they do.
2
SPEAKER_01
What the dancers do on our show, for sure.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you like know their life.
2
SPEAKER_01
I did that a little bit.
2
SPEAKER_01
Then when I later on moved to New York, I continued that.
2
SPEAKER_01
I went to steps uptown and wow, was I bad.
2
SPEAKER_01
People in New York, the level is different than my little town where I came from.
2
SPEAKER_01
I have trophies at home from my dance troupe, and we would go to places and we would win, but we were just not that good.
2
SPEAKER_01
When you re all of a sudden in Manhattan, you re like, wow.
2
SPEAKER_01
Before, I was always in the front row behind the teacher.
2
SPEAKER_01
There, I was like moved back.
2
SPEAKER_01
I was like in the end.
2
SPEAKER_00
In the doorway at the end.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I was not that good.
2
SPEAKER_00
So as it evolved, this six month long process, it started on a whim, right?
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, let s just send him this coupon, as you called it.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then you get there and now apparently you did well enough in the interview that you go to another stage.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I got to be on the show and that is like a live show.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh wow.
2
SPEAKER_01
So was it like, it was a reality show kind of?
2
SPEAKER_01
No, it s kind of a late night show.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh.
2
SPEAKER_01
Like a Jimmy Fallon show.
2
SPEAKER_00
You said Jimmy cause you were just on.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like freshest in your memory.
2
SPEAKER_01
No, because I was thinking about David Letterman first and I was thinking about Jay Leno, but you know, like a late night show like that.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it went on for six months and every week he would introduce three or four new people again and then people could vote.
2
SPEAKER_01
So we would have to do like a catwalk.
2
SPEAKER_01
They would show our number.
2
SPEAKER_01
You can YouTube it and you can see it.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s hilarious.
2
SPEAKER_00
You ll have to wade through a lot of pictures of you on the beach, but you ll get to it eventually.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then there s a number and they re like, hey, if you want to vote for Heidi, call in this number.
2
SPEAKER_01
If you want to vote for Michelle, call this number.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then at the end of that night, people would vote for you.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then you would know if you re either in or out.
2
SPEAKER_01
So you had to win the week, the month.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then in the end, it was again, six girls from those six months, right?
2
SPEAKER_01
Whittling it down, whittling it down.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I won that entire thing.
2
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_00
OK, we need to pause there because I need to know where you re at mentally through the process.
2
SPEAKER_01
I thought I was going home any time.
2
SPEAKER_01
But beyond that, I never looked at myself and I was like, oh, I got this or like, oh, I m way prettier than them.
2
SPEAKER_01
I had none of this.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know why I m here.
2
SPEAKER_01
I just tried this.
2
SPEAKER_01
I never even thought that modeling was a job.
2
SPEAKER_01
I didn t really think that far.
2
SPEAKER_01
Did your friend make it kind of far or no?
2
SPEAKER_01
No, she didn t enter.
2
SPEAKER_01
She kind of pushed me more to enter.
2
SPEAKER_00
But what I m trying to get at or comprehend is that we go from zero awareness of any of this to at the end of six months, you have a $300,000 modeling contract that s going to bring you to New York.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m curious your fantasy of your life prior to that.
2
SPEAKER_00
What was it?
2
SPEAKER_00
And when did you start adjusting?
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, maybe this is where I ll go in life.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, I was really into fashion design.
2
SPEAKER_01
I was doing my Abitur.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, right.
2
SPEAKER_00
You were going to go to fashion school.
2
SPEAKER_01
Fashion school.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
So we have 13 years of school here.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s 12 years in Germany.
2
SPEAKER_01
You have to do 13 years in order to study.
2
SPEAKER_01
And my next step would have been the fashion design school in Dusseldorf, which they already said yes for me to come, which I then never went to because I won this modeling contest.
2
SPEAKER_01
So when I won this modeling contest and price was 300,000, it was Deutschmark at the time.
2
SPEAKER_01
It was a very long time ago, but you had to actually work for that.
2
SPEAKER_01
So it wasn t like, okay, here s the money.
2
SPEAKER_01
I went and I never looked back.
2
SPEAKER_01
First I went to Miami and it was overflowing with so many models.
2
SPEAKER_01
Literally would go to casting and you would be 195 and you would sit there like at the dentist and you look around.
2
SPEAKER_01
around and there s like just one gorgeous girl after the next.
2
SPEAKER_01
You go in, they see you for a hot second, look at your five pictures in your book and then they re like, OK, thanks.
2
SPEAKER_01
Bye.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then you leave.
2
SPEAKER_01
It took forever to get a job.
2
SPEAKER_01
So I did a lot of tests there.
2
SPEAKER_01
So you meet with photographers and hair and makeup artists that are also new and up and coming and they also want to work on their modeling portfolio.
2
SPEAKER_01
And then I was like, I m done now with Miami.
2
SPEAKER_01
I want to go to New York where it s really happening.
2
SPEAKER_01
I went to New York and I get all these tests from Miami.
2
SPEAKER_01
This is just not cool.
2
SPEAKER_01
You gotta start all over because you gotta be like this, you gotta be like that, you re way too happy.
2
SPEAKER_01
Also, you could skip a few meals.
2
SPEAKER_00
A few potatoes in a pillowcase.
2
SPEAKER_01
At the time, I was considered heavy.
2
SPEAKER_01
Then I would go try Paris, Milan.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, Karl Langenfeld famously was like, you re too heavy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Man, he doesn t even deserve me to say it right after what I heard he said.
2
SPEAKER_00
He s like, our boobs are too big and she s too heavy.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but you were being told that often.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m wondering how you... Persistent.
2
SPEAKER_01
I m gonna get into this house somehow.
2
SPEAKER_01
If it s not the front door, it ll be the back door.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I m gonna climb up and go through the chimney.
2
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_01
What about your parents?
2
SPEAKER_01
You told them, hey, while you were in Thailand... Yes, because not the whole entire thing happened.
2
SPEAKER_01
This was like a six months contest.
2
SPEAKER_01
They came back, but then this happened.
2
SPEAKER_01
I had done the casting and they said yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
When I was on the show, my mom would then go with me.
2
SPEAKER_00
Were they excited or fearful when you won?
2
SPEAKER_01
Both, because also that meant I m packing my bag and I m going.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
You just saw someone leave the house.
2
SPEAKER_00
My daughter?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s a bedroom with no light on.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you re one of how many?
2
SPEAKER_01
I have a brother 10 years older than me.
2
SPEAKER_00
So yeah, you re one of only two.
2
SPEAKER_00
You ve got at least three other ones.
2
SPEAKER_01
And no one really left in my town.
2
SPEAKER_01
Now, when I go back to my town, I probably know everyone.
2
SPEAKER_01
Not really, but kind of.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I never looked back because I was just so excited about all these amazing things that I got to see.
2
SPEAKER_01
And New York was and is super exciting.
2
SPEAKER_01
It took a while, though, for me to get started.
2
SPEAKER_00
But once it starts, it s pretty meteoric.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but it took me a few years.
2
SPEAKER_01
I did catalogs a lot, which was very frowned upon at the time.
2
SPEAKER_01
You either are a cool high fashion model or you are a commercial model.
2
SPEAKER_01
And also when you are a commercial model, you re not good at anything but that.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s kind of like being a commercial actor.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, the whole thing is perception and cachet.
2
SPEAKER_01
Just in general, we have to fit in one particular box and you can t get out of that because obviously we re never allowed to be multitasking or multi-talented at anything.
2
SPEAKER_01
So even now, when you do a song or you do something, people are like, why are you singing?
2
SPEAKER_01
And it s like, well, why the heck not?
2
SPEAKER_01
Why are you singing?
2
SPEAKER_01
Just because this is your proper job description.
2
SPEAKER_01
I feel like anyone should be able to do anything.
2
SPEAKER_01
Either people like what you re doing and if no one likes it, then don t listen to it.
3
SPEAKER_01
But I feel like everyone should have the opportunity to do whatever they want to do.
3
SPEAKER_02
People should do what makes them happy and everyone should look elsewhere if they re triggered by it.
3
SPEAKER_02
But suffice to say by 2000, I guess, probably two-ish, you ve been on the cover of
3
SPEAKER_02
the French, German, Portuguese, and Spanish Vogue.
3
SPEAKER_02
You re on the cover of Elle and Style, Marie Callender, Glamour, Harper s Bazaar.
3
SPEAKER_02
And here s my question, because I think you seemingly do something that appears brave from my perspective, which is you ve actually captured the coveted cachet.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then I m wondering the decision then to go into Sports Illustrated and Victoria s Secret, I imagine was not advised by some people.
3
SPEAKER_01
I never listen to anyone in any case.
3
SPEAKER_01
I love that.
3
SPEAKER_02
I want to know, you re on the backside of having been on all the Dream magazines.
3
SPEAKER_02
Are you like, well, who gives a shit?
3
SPEAKER_02
Where s the money?
3
SPEAKER_02
What is the thing that goes, I don t really care about that now.
3
SPEAKER_02
I m going to go do this thing.
3
SPEAKER_02
At the end of that, tell me the dramatic difference between being on the cover of those and having been on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
3
SPEAKER_01
When you are on the cover of Vogue, no one knows about it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Being on the cover of Sports Illustrated, I could really feel that because at that time also there was no social media or any of these types of things.
3
SPEAKER_01
But the number, I think, for Sports Illustrated at the time was 55 million readers.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
So you feel that number.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s not that they sold necessarily that many magazines, but that was still in a time where it would lay somewhere.
3
SPEAKER_02
It was at your dental office.
3
SPEAKER_01
So this magazine that was laying there went through maybe a hundred people, right?
3
SPEAKER_01
So this is how they counted the numbers, I guess, at that time.
3
SPEAKER_02
I have this distinct memory.
3
SPEAKER_02
I wonder if Monica, you have it, you re probably too young.
3
SPEAKER_02
You d get on an airplane and your first order of business is like, I hope I find some magazines someone left behind.
3
SPEAKER_02
Or there d even be in the very first compartment ones that people discarded.
3
SPEAKER_02
And your whole mission was like, God, I hope there s a People or a Car magazine or something.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
Remember that?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
Right.
3
SPEAKER_02
So those Sports Illustrated would be like on an airplane and then it would go around the country.
3
SPEAKER_01
When I was in the cover of Sports Illustrated, I would go into a restaurant and they would not necessarily know my name, but I could hear people go like, gosh, I bet I saw those
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they recognized me.
3
SPEAKER_01
You know, all of a sudden I could feel heads were turning.
3
SPEAKER_01
People would all of a sudden recognize you.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s like, how the heck do they even recognize me?
3
SPEAKER_01
I have no makeup on.
3
SPEAKER_01
Plus on the cover, you like make that smoldery face, the hair s blowing in the wind.
3
SPEAKER_01
I don t look anything like that right now.
3
SPEAKER_01
How is this even possible?
3
SPEAKER_01
I still have that today sometimes when I m with my husband somewhere and I don t have glam.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m just little old me and people like, oh my God, it s Heidi.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, how the heck do they spot you?
3
SPEAKER_01
I can tell you.
3
SPEAKER_01
I never understand that.
3
SPEAKER_02
You re tall enough that people are gonna go, not that looks like her, that s her.
3
SPEAKER_02
Look how tall she is.
3
SPEAKER_02
It s the height.
3
SPEAKER_02
If you were 5 7 , I bet you d get recognized.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s funny you say that with the height, because a lot of people, when they meet me, they say, you re so much shorter than I thought.
3
SPEAKER_01
Oh, interesting.
3
SPEAKER_01
I do get that.
3
SPEAKER_01
Interesting.
3
SPEAKER_02
But let s just say we were just standing next to each other.
3
SPEAKER_02
What are you, 6 1 ?
3
SPEAKER_01
5 9 .
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, your heels are enormous.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay, well, I rescind everything I just said.
3
SPEAKER_02
Are you in heels all the time when you re out?
3
SPEAKER_02
And maybe you should start wearing flats.
3
SPEAKER_01
When I m not working, I m always in Birkenstocks, basically.
3
SPEAKER_00
I mean, you re a very famous person.
3
SPEAKER_00
That s really what it is at this point.
3
SPEAKER_00
Sorry to be the first to tell you this.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, but you know, it does genuinely surprise me that when you re not glammed and your hair is not all done and you re not in some fancy outfit, I m always like, wow, how did I not blend in?
3
SPEAKER_01
It s weird.
3
SPEAKER_02
OK, but you just exposed, I think, what your story is about yourself.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I think now your story is that you on those magazines is this version that is created with hair and makeup and outfits and that you yourself in your natural state aren t that glamorous.
3
SPEAKER_02
Is that your story?
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I m not that glamorous.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yar, we got another flash breaking news.
3
SPEAKER_00
He s saying glamorous as in like specialness.
3
SPEAKER_00
You in your head might think that s.
3
SPEAKER_02
The production.
3
SPEAKER_00
Persona and production and me doing a face, but really you give that off naturally.
3
SPEAKER_00
You might not be able to accept that, but you do.
3
SPEAKER_02
Sorry.
3
SPEAKER_02
We re terribly sorry.
3
SPEAKER_01
We re insulting you big time.
3
SPEAKER_01
No, but it happens sometimes in moments where I m not even talking to people or they re not even, you know, I m not even being like bubbly or they hear my accent.
3
SPEAKER_02
And you re speaking with a full American accent.
3
SPEAKER_02
What if you walk around with an American accent?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, hey, I m not even German.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m like from Kentucky.
3
SPEAKER_02
Stay tuned for more farm chair experts.
3
SPEAKER_00
But it factors real.
3
SPEAKER_00
I don t like believing in that either.
3
SPEAKER_02
You should love believing in that, because that s exactly what I m explaining that you have.
3
SPEAKER_02
You try to compare what you look like to some weird ratio thing that you ve seen on covers of magazines, and you re completely ignoring that.
3
SPEAKER_02
It s like, what s in a human being s eyes?
3
SPEAKER_02
That s what makes someone so special.
3
SPEAKER_00
Well, I don t like believing because I don t think I have it.
3
SPEAKER_00
So then I want everyone to be able to have it or like not, you know, it s like a non-issue, but it is real.
3
SPEAKER_00
And when you win out of 25,000 girls that you ve never modeled.
3
SPEAKER_02
Some have a little more X factor than others.
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, certainly I can concede to that.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you have it.
3
SPEAKER_02
You re so uncomfortable, aren t you?
3
SPEAKER_02
It s turned emotional and real.
3
SPEAKER_02
No.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay, but back to Sports Illustrated, were people in your world, you had an agent obviously at that point, a lot of other people, were they saying don t do this or do this?
3
SPEAKER_01
To be honest, I don t remember anymore.
3
SPEAKER_01
A lot of the times they didn t even want me to go to those types of magazines because they said that I m not good enough in any case to go.
3
SPEAKER_01
Again, I was like a catalog model and at the time anyone who was doing Sports Illustrated was a famous model.
3
SPEAKER_01
They didn t have a person in there that you ve never heard the name before.
3
SPEAKER_02
If you had to isolate the biggest catalyst to your career, what would you say was it?
3
SPEAKER_01
Definitely Sports Illustrated.
3
SPEAKER_01
Victory Secret also, because at that time, those catalogs, I don t know how many times a week they were sent to your house, just being in people s faces all the time.
3
SPEAKER_02
And those really did have probably a circulation of like a hundred million.
3
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
Huge.
3
SPEAKER_01
So being on that cover of French Vogue is so hard to get because it s like really highbrow and you have to be a real high-end fashion model to be on there or you have to be brand new or have something special.
3
SPEAKER_01
I have no idea how I even got on that.
3
SPEAKER_01
I was so lucky.
3
SPEAKER_01
But no one even took note that I was on there.
3
SPEAKER_01
But all these other things people took note of.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then being on TV is a whole other thing because you re in everyone s home.
3
SPEAKER_01
And so people see you even more so.
3
SPEAKER_01
When I travel the world and I go on vacation, I m sometimes in the smallest little towns and people are like, oh my God, we watch you on America s Got Talent.
3
SPEAKER_01
But I don t mind it at all.
3
SPEAKER_01
I love that people love the show so much.
3
SPEAKER_01
I love the show that much.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I m happy that you make a lot of people happy by what you do when they watch it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Well, my other guess is that the second gift Victoria s Secret gave you, which you were with them for a very long time, like maybe 13 years or something, is that you started hosting their annual show.
3
SPEAKER_02
Is that the first time you ever hosted?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_01
It s because I was super hammy and it started when Access Hollywood or ET or any of those TV shows would come and they wanted to interview us backstage.
3
SPEAKER_01
The girls were always like, no, I don t want to talk to you.
3
SPEAKER_01
So they didn t want to talk to the anchors and I was like, just give me the mic, I ll do it.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I just ran with them and I would look into the camera like I was talking to the people at home and I m like, OK, now I m going to interview Stephanie Seymour.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, OK, Stephanie, what did you have for breakfast this morning?
3
SPEAKER_01
And they would talk to me so I could just chat with them backstage versus their interviewer didn t have a shot.
3
SPEAKER_01
So I would get those gigs more and more.
3
SPEAKER_01
Victoria s Secret then asked me to host their show.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I was always super nervous, but I also loved the challenge.
3
SPEAKER_01
I could overcome something that was not super easy for me to do, because then it s different.
3
SPEAKER_01
You have to read a prompter, all of a sudden becomes very serious and has to be your language.
3
SPEAKER_01
And then you like fuffle with what am I saying?
3
SPEAKER_01
And then you stumble over your words and your life.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it s scary.
3
SPEAKER_01
I loved it at the same time because I was like, I d rather do it than someone else doing it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, my hunch is that you were nervous to do it.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then when you actually started talking to somebody, it s so very natural and organic for you that that would take over.
3
SPEAKER_01
But also talking is different.
3
SPEAKER_01
But when someone writes a script for you, because I also think who wants to hear all of that at home?
3
SPEAKER_01
But also, you know, at the same time, when I started, also, obviously, I wasn t as verbal about those things.
3
SPEAKER_01
Now I am.
3
SPEAKER_01
You ve earned the right.
3
SPEAKER_01
Now I work with the writers.
3
SPEAKER_01
Obviously on AGT, we don t have writers.
3
SPEAKER_01
But when I do, for example, in Germany, my big finale, which is like three and a half hours long.
3
SPEAKER_01
So there is a lot of prompter reading that I have to do.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I work with someone to work on the text.
3
SPEAKER_01
And there too, I m like, this is too long.
3
SPEAKER_01
People don t want to hear all this stuff.
3
SPEAKER_01
They want to have fun.
3
SPEAKER_01
Because if I was listening to this, I would change the channel too.
3
SPEAKER_01
Like it s boring.
3
SPEAKER_01
Also, everyone s attention is this big now.
3
SPEAKER_02
So then Project Runway is the next thing that s like a huge career deviation.
3
SPEAKER_02
And it s just preposterously successful.
3
SPEAKER_01
And I did Project Runway and Germany s Next Top Model at the same time.
3
SPEAKER_01
And it was because Tyra was doing America s Next Top Model.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we were always kind of changing notes.
4
SPEAKER_01
So she and I, we were very similar in the way that we wanted more than what we had.
4
SPEAKER_02
Ambitious.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, kind of like making products.
4
SPEAKER_01
I designed for Birkenstocks, is it 30 years ago already?
4
SPEAKER_01
Time goes so fast.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I think it was 30 years ago.
4
SPEAKER_01
And she was also doing things.
4
SPEAKER_01
Then she was doing a song and I m like, oh my God, this is so cool.
4
SPEAKER_01
They would call us Tidy and Hyra.
4
SPEAKER_01
Because we were so similar and I wouldn t say opportunist but kind of a little bit of an opportunist because sometimes, for example, I got to always wear the gazillion dollar bra, you know, like I don t know how much it was like maybe 10 million with $750,000 penny to match.
4
SPEAKER_01
It had like a diamond that was beyond huge.
4
SPEAKER_01
So and I was always like this is incredible but really because I was genuinely interested in all of that stuff and then I was like let s do a line together and then I made a jewelry line with these people.
4
SPEAKER_01
I met people and then I had ideas and they actually became reality.
4
SPEAKER_02
But also Heidi, you re clearly smart enough to go like, okay, this thing I m doing will expire.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m not seeing a lot of 60 year olds on the covers of Sports Illustrated.
4
SPEAKER_01
There should be, there should be.
4
SPEAKER_01
There should, and that s great.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m not condoning it.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m saying you were rightly going, I also need some other pokers in the fire.
4
SPEAKER_01
To be honest, it wasn t because of I need to have focus on the fire.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was literally because I just love being creative.
4
SPEAKER_02
You were hungry and interested.
4
SPEAKER_01
I mean, I still do things like I paint.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do a lot of things that are not necessarily there to earn money.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I am a creative person.
4
SPEAKER_01
When you would come to my house, you would see I collect a thousand things like I have every boarding stop of any plane ride I ve been ever on.
4
SPEAKER_02
You said you re a hoarder.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m a hoarder.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have the whole entire Barbie collection.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like once I was- Wow.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, because then Barbie- How many are in that collection?
4
SPEAKER_01
Because I have one.
4
SPEAKER_02
You were the ambassador of Barbie in 2009-ish?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, maybe.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s a Heidi Barbie.
4
SPEAKER_01
There s a Heidi Barbie.
4
SPEAKER_01
You know, it s Barbie always as someone else, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
So then Barbie was me.
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how that happened either.
4
SPEAKER_01
I was like, oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m obsessed because I also always played with Barbies and this was amazing.
4
SPEAKER_01
And so I collected all the Barbies now because I m a hoarder, a professional hoarder.
4
SPEAKER_02
OK, so Project Runway goes forever.
4
SPEAKER_01
I did 17 seasons.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, wow.
4
SPEAKER_01
And now Top Model is my 19th season.
4
SPEAKER_02
Oh, my God.
4
SPEAKER_02
So, OK, this dovetails into my overarching question slash concern.
4
SPEAKER_02
Most people with two really successful shows, when their agent calls and says like, hey, they want to talk about you coming to America s Got Talent, they might go like, well, I ve already got like 15 shows and I represent 26 brands.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, no, no, I called them.
4
SPEAKER_01
You called them?
4
SPEAKER_01
Because what happened was Howard Stern was talking about Sharon Osbourne was leaving.
4
SPEAKER_02
Season 8.
4
SPEAKER_01
And that they were looking for someone to fill in her spot.
4
SPEAKER_01
Then I was like, I want to go and introduce myself to these people.
4
SPEAKER_02
Wonderful.
4
SPEAKER_01
So I literally went and I introduced myself to everyone over at America s Got Talent and Fremantle.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they said, oh yeah, we took someone else because at that time they only had three.
4
SPEAKER_01
So then they were like, OK, they picked Mel B. I get it.
4
SPEAKER_01
She s probably more fun and this and that, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_01
And then they called me and they re like, actually, we re going to have four judges and we do want you also.
4
SPEAKER_01
And that s 10 years ago.
4
SPEAKER_01
I did 10 seasons.
4
SPEAKER_02
Right.
4
SPEAKER_00
Aren t you tired?
4
SPEAKER_02
When you started.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m tired for you just hearing this and I m 36.
4
SPEAKER_01
All those people, you feed off everyone s energy and their excitement.
4
SPEAKER_01
I feel like if I wasn t doing all these things, I feel like then I would be tired.
4
SPEAKER_01
When I go there and all the lights are on and they come and they tell their story and they do their act, it s just a real fun day.
4
SPEAKER_02
We know this intimately.
4
SPEAKER_02
Many times we ve been somewhere doing live shows and we re both totally exhausted.
4
SPEAKER_02
Monica was dying of terrible flu we all had.
4
SPEAKER_02
And so Monica s almost lifeless backstage.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m getting her a candy bar, hoping she could eat one thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Is it because you re going live and you re nervous about this?
4
SPEAKER_00
No, no, we all got this weird bug.
4
SPEAKER_00
Dax didn t have it.
4
SPEAKER_00
I had it before we had to go on.
4
SPEAKER_02
She was dehydrated, laying on a couch backstage.
4
SPEAKER_02
She s dead.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m wondering how this is going to work.
4
SPEAKER_02
And to your point, you re sitting in the wings of the stage.
4
SPEAKER_02
You re watching the band play.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then all of a sudden this thing starts just enveloping you.
4
SPEAKER_02
And this source of energy you re talking about just fills you.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then you walk out there and then you re magically healed.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s happened to me a bunch of times.
4
SPEAKER_00
But still, I m just impressed.
4
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
4
SPEAKER_02
Thank you so much.
4
SPEAKER_01
I love doing what I m doing.
4
SPEAKER_01
I knock on wood literally every day.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that was it!
4
SPEAKER_01
Yay, we found it!
4
SPEAKER_02
Monica knocks on wood a hundred times a day.
4
SPEAKER_01
She leans over to knock on wood.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do all the time too.
4
SPEAKER_01
That was the thing.
4
SPEAKER_00
I m like, what is it?
4
SPEAKER_00
That s so funny.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s okay, Jax s knock counts for you.
4
SPEAKER_00
I always make him knock because he s closest to the wood.
4
SPEAKER_00
So I m knocking on your behalf.
4
SPEAKER_00
No, I knock on wood all the time.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I believe in it.
4
SPEAKER_02
That s exactly what it was.
4
SPEAKER_02
I saw you knock on wood in several different interviews and I go, oh my God, it s Monica.
4
SPEAKER_00
That s hilarious.
4
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
4
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, you love it.
4
SPEAKER_00
I do.
4
SPEAKER_02
What was it like, and let me say I m friends with him, what was it like working with Howard?
4
SPEAKER_02
Be honest.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s not very joyous.
4
SPEAKER_02
Right.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, that s kind of his shtick.
4
SPEAKER_01
And it s hard, I think, to sit next to someone who is very joyous because I was always singing and I m like, because sometimes it takes a minute when we re not live.
4
SPEAKER_01
And they re interviewing people backstage.
4
SPEAKER_01
They re not sending the next, the next, the next, the next.
4
SPEAKER_01
So they put a little bit of music in the room so that the audience doesn t fall asleep.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m like tralala-ing along.
4
SPEAKER_01
Or Mel is next to me and then we re just singing from the top of our lungs.
4
SPEAKER_01
Or someone was there doing some opera.
4
SPEAKER_01
So we re copying this opera that someone just sang.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he s like, good God.
4
SPEAKER_01
So he was always next to me like, please.
4
SPEAKER_01
Sometimes, you know, he would have a producer come to me and they d be like, Howard is
4
SPEAKER_01
kind of telling us that.
4
SPEAKER_01
But I liked him.
4
SPEAKER_01
He is very sarcastic and very dry.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m just not like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I wasn t going to have him pull me negative like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
I just put a little line here and I m like, there s a wall and nothing is coming either which way.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was going his way, I guess, because I was loud.
4
SPEAKER_01
I do like him, how he listens still sometimes when Howard talks about us, that he didn t have a great time.
4
SPEAKER_01
And it s sad sometimes when I see that, because I always thought at the end that he sort of did have a fun time.
4
SPEAKER_02
But the shtick on the show is he goes on vacation with all these fun people in Mexico and he s miserable and everyone s having fun and he s miserable.
4
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t really go on vacation is the thing.
4
SPEAKER_01
He doesn t really fly anywhere, no?
4
SPEAKER_02
He does, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
And he ll go on these vacations down to Mexico and all these people are there and then his whole bit that whole week will be about how everyone was having fun and he was miserable and he went to bed early.
4
SPEAKER_02
But...
4
SPEAKER_02
I ve been at his house and he s very fun and joyous and kind and patient.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have too.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then I ve heard the account of the thing on the radio and it s different because it s a show.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s a persona a little bit.
4
SPEAKER_02
So don t you think that s what s happening when he recounts the AGT?
4
SPEAKER_01
What is the purpose of that?
4
SPEAKER_01
I don t get it.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, I would be guessing.
4
SPEAKER_02
I don t really know off the top of my head, but maybe I think he feels self-conscious with the amount of success he s had and the amount of money he has.
4
SPEAKER_02
And so the only way he feels like people will still find him approachable is if he s at least miserable from it.
4
SPEAKER_02
I think that s a little bit what s going on.
4
SPEAKER_01
Maybe also they have all of us there because they want different kind of humans there with different walks of life, with different emotions towards what we see there.
4
SPEAKER_02
Well, I have a hunch this one will be much more eye to eye on because I m longtime friends with Terry.
4
SPEAKER_02
He was just on.
4
SPEAKER_01
Terry Crews?
4
SPEAKER_01
I love Terry.
4
SPEAKER_01
Love.
4
SPEAKER_01
He s the man with the best energy.
4
SPEAKER_01
Positive and dancing and singing and playing.
4
SPEAKER_01
He has the hardest gig on that show because we re very far from the people who come onto the stage and when we tell them no or sometimes also why that is a no, they walk off the stage and they re not very happy and he
4
SPEAKER_01
has to deal with whatever comes towards him, and he does it so beautifully.
4
SPEAKER_01
Always uplifts them again.
4
SPEAKER_01
Obviously, I don t think any one of us wants anyone to walk out of there feeling terrible, but they do.
4
SPEAKER_01
And when they get to him, I feel like he has a way of turning it around for them somehow.
4
SPEAKER_01
And he s the best peck popper.
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah, he did it for us.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was exciting.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m very good at it too.
4
SPEAKER_01
You are.
4
SPEAKER_01
When you re nude?
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I do it on the show.
4
SPEAKER_01
You do?
4
SPEAKER_01
I think they cut it out all the time, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
Me and Terry did it.
4
SPEAKER_02
We did it, and Monica was impressed that I could do it.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I m impressed.
4
SPEAKER_02
She didn t even think I could do it.
4
SPEAKER_01
See, I m making her bounce right now.
4
SPEAKER_02
I can t do it.
4
SPEAKER_01
I can do it.
4
SPEAKER_02
Are you doing it right now?
4
SPEAKER_02
I m doing it right now.
4
SPEAKER_01
I have too many layers of things on.
4
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, who would know?
4
SPEAKER_02
I feel like if you do it on the show, that s amazing.
4
SPEAKER_01
No, I can t.
4
SPEAKER_02
I can and I will.
4
SPEAKER_02
If he gets me on the beach in St.
4
SPEAKER_02
Barts, you might see him.
4
SPEAKER_01
I can and I am.
4
SPEAKER_02
Okay, tell me about this current season because this is a bit of a different approach to AGT, right?
4
SPEAKER_02
Fantasy League?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah well because people love fantasy league anything I feel like especially in America you can participate a little bit.
4
SPEAKER_01
We are participating in the way that we got to draw our favorite acts.
4
SPEAKER_02
From the last however long you ve been doing it.
4
SPEAKER_01
America got to pick 50 or
5
SPEAKER_00
60 acts that they love from the past, but not just in America, but from all got talents from around the world.
5
SPEAKER_00
So then, and this was Simon s idea, I think because he wants us to do more things and he wants to be on TV more than we already am because he s like, why are we even here?
5
SPEAKER_00
They cut everything out.
5
SPEAKER_00
And he s the boss and he can change the rules and I love it.
5
SPEAKER_00
And how we got to pick who we wanted, they had these different size straws.
5
SPEAKER_00
The longest gets to choose first and there s a shorter one, shorter and the shortest.
5
SPEAKER_00
So the straws come around.
5
SPEAKER_00
I had the longest straw.
5
SPEAKER_00
He had the shortest straw.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s what America wants.
5
SPEAKER_00
He walked in with his head so high.
5
SPEAKER_00
He s like, yes, new season, different concept.
5
SPEAKER_00
He had all these ideas.
5
SPEAKER_00
He has the shortest straw.
5
SPEAKER_00
He walked out of there so sad and upset because we took all the best ones like right off the get go.
5
SPEAKER_02
So basically this season, the four of you get a team.
5
SPEAKER_00
We get a team that we choose.
5
SPEAKER_00
So I had the longest straw, so I could go over to the board of all the acts and I could pick my favorite one.
5
SPEAKER_00
Then Howie, I guess, had the next one, so he got to pick, then Mel, and then Simon, then back to me.
5
SPEAKER_00
So then you get to mentor these acts.
5
SPEAKER_00
So before they come onto the stage and we never get to see what they do, but here we all have the opportunity to work with them and say what we feel could be better.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then it s up to them if they want to do it or not.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I ve had that too, where they were like, yeah, I love what you re saying, but I m going to stick to how I m going to do it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, Heidi.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I ll be like, totally fine.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because at the end, the audience in the room is going to vote.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I don t want it also to be my fault if you completely change it and you don t believe in it.
5
SPEAKER_00
I always love to play devil s advocate or I always love to point things out.
5
SPEAKER_02
You just tried to knock on wood just then when you were saying devil s advocate.
5
SPEAKER_02
Did you feel yourself looking for wood?
5
SPEAKER_00
No, no.
5
SPEAKER_00
She feels very confident.
5
SPEAKER_00
But it was fun to do that because I feel like some we got to elevate the act a little bit and others didn t want to do certain things.
5
SPEAKER_00
The audience agreed sometimes.
5
SPEAKER_02
Do you think now though that you are actually participating and involved that when these heartbreaks happen, I imagine you two will be much more effective than you had ever been in the past?
5
100%.
5
SPEAKER_00
I had one that got stolen from me by Howie Mandel.
5
SPEAKER_02
He s a snake.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s actually called the Ramadani brothers.
5
SPEAKER_00
So these are those two guys where one guy
5
SPEAKER_02
climbs a ladder with the other guy on his head.
5
SPEAKER_00
On top of his head.
5
SPEAKER_00
What?
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay, yeah, you have to watch this.
5
SPEAKER_02
It s bonkers.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s impossible.
5
SPEAKER_00
It is one of the most, well, I love them, and I also love the regurgitator.
5
SPEAKER_00
He was not on this season.
5
SPEAKER_02
He s the guy who did a flip with a sword in his mouth?
5
SPEAKER_00
No, the regurgitator was also my all-time favorite.
5
SPEAKER_00
He would just swallow things and regurgitate things back up, and he would do things in his stomach with it.
5
SPEAKER_00
What?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, he has done things where he was like, okay, Heidi, can I borrow your diamond ring?
5
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, sure.
5
SPEAKER_00
I would give him the ring,
5
SPEAKER_00
Of course.
5
SPEAKER_00
He would have like a tiny little locket.
5
SPEAKER_00
He would close the locket.
5
SPEAKER_00
He would swallow the key, swallow all of those things separately, and then he would regurgitate it back up.
5
SPEAKER_00
And my ring was in the locket.
5
SPEAKER_00
No!
5
SPEAKER_02
Do you think that s magic or it s really happening in his stomach?
5
SPEAKER_02
I really don t know.
5
SPEAKER_02
I mean, that feels impossible with what I know about the human stomach.
5
SPEAKER_00
I know, but he s in front of you and he does these things and you re like, how is this possible?
5
SPEAKER_00
Also, he would have a glass of sugar and he would have a glass of water.
5
SPEAKER_00
So he would swallow all this sugar and you see, he shows in his mouth, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar.
5
SPEAKER_00
He shows again.
5
SPEAKER_00
He s not hiding this anywhere.
5
SPEAKER_00
Then he s swallowing all this water.
5
SPEAKER_00
After the sugar, swallow, swallow, swallow again.
5
SPEAKER_00
Tongue out.
5
SPEAKER_00
He s showing a look.
5
SPEAKER_00
Everything is gone.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then regurgitates the sugar back out and it s all dry.
5
SPEAKER_00
No!
5
SPEAKER_00
No!
5
SPEAKER_02
We gotta get him on.
5
SPEAKER_00
He swallowed razor blades.
5
SPEAKER_00
Then he swallowed little tiny tomatoes.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then he will regurgitate.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were cut up.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were cut up.
5
SPEAKER_02
Diced tomatoes.
5
SPEAKER_00
That beats everything.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_02
Did he not win everything?
5
SPEAKER_00
No, because I think it s too out there.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, people are maybe a little grossed out.
5
SPEAKER_00
I think they were a little grossed out.
5
SPEAKER_02
This is where your German-ness really helped you.
5
SPEAKER_00
Also my two boys.
5
SPEAKER_00
I m used to gross talk and farting and they think this is hilarious.
5
SPEAKER_00
Like whose fart stinks more than the other.
5
SPEAKER_00
I win.
5
SPEAKER_00
I win.
5
SPEAKER_00
No, but for me this was the most outrageous thing I ve ever seen.
5
SPEAKER_00
So same with those Ramadani brothers.
5
SPEAKER_00
So then Howie stole them from me.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I don t really cry a lot on television because maybe that s also my German side.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t want people to see that side of me and I m told to kind of hold it in.
5
SPEAKER_00
And usually I can.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it has happened maybe like two times on the show.
5
SPEAKER_00
There was a gentleman who has been put to jail for his whole life and he had just come out and he was singing this song and literally I couldn t stop crying.
5
SPEAKER_00
So sometimes that does happen.
5
SPEAKER_00
But then with the Ramadani brothers, I was so mad that I wanted to like leave.
5
SPEAKER_00
Those were my favorite guys.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love the investment level.
5
SPEAKER_00
This is great.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s different.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s fun for us to do that.
5
SPEAKER_00
So we meet with them before, they show us their act, and I m also all into Bedazzling.
5
SPEAKER_00
Also, do you know Piff the Magic Dragon?
5
SPEAKER_02
No.
5
SPEAKER_00
He actually has a show in Las Vegas.
5
SPEAKER_02
Not Puff.
5
SPEAKER_00
No, Piff.
5
SPEAKER_00
Actually, a lot of our acts have shows in Las Vegas already, and so I upgraded his Magic Dragon outfit.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, you made it sparkly?
5
SPEAKER_00
Yep.
5
SPEAKER_02
Okay, Jennifer Love.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_02
Did she warn you?
5
SPEAKER_00
No, she just said that it s cold here.
5
SPEAKER_02
That was her only... Which is not true.
5
SPEAKER_02
Right.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s interesting.
5
SPEAKER_02
That s the only thing she warned you about.
5
SPEAKER_02
In general, and I m inclined to let it go because I like how perfect it feels, but in general on this show, I m most interested in you have the full fairy tale, but the full fairy tale is never the full fairy tale.
5
SPEAKER_02
There s some predictable struggle on the other side of this.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m wondering if it s part of the same thing, the German-ness that you don t want to cry on TV.
5
SPEAKER_02
This ride feels almost too good to be true.
5
100%.
5
SPEAKER_00
I don t know how I got on this thing.
5
SPEAKER_02
Right, but it seems like it just keeps going straight up.
5
SPEAKER_02
And I m curious, what have been the dips for you?
5
SPEAKER_02
Or where did you have to steel yourself and recommit or focus or reframe something?
5
SPEAKER_00
Because life just can t be a straight.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, life s a beatdown.
5
SPEAKER_00
I mean, obviously, along the way, people said no or didn t want you.
5
SPEAKER_02
I guess you ve been divorced.
5
SPEAKER_02
Maybe that was something that was painful.
5
100%.
5
SPEAKER_00
Dumped many times.
5
SPEAKER_00
First divorce, second divorce.
5
SPEAKER_00
You don t want that.
5
SPEAKER_00
Everyone knows about it.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, if Mrs. and Mr. Schmidt get divorced, no one knows about it.
5
SPEAKER_00
Right.
5
SPEAKER_00
And it s hard enough.
5
SPEAKER_02
They re at the grocery store.
5
SPEAKER_02
No one s like pitying them.
5
SPEAKER_00
Plus, you know, a lot of untrue stories might get told.
5
SPEAKER_02
And you have children that you want to protect from all that stuff.
5
SPEAKER_00
You have to deal with that, but hey, I went again, marriage number three, here we go.
5
SPEAKER_00
I know, you re very positive, it s very infectious.
5
SPEAKER_00
It is, and that s why I m saying I m inclined to let this just go.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was never looking back, and even though after that I was like, okay, I m never doing that again.
5
SPEAKER_00
For the second time, this didn t work out.
5
SPEAKER_00
Why does one actually need to be married?
5
SPEAKER_00
We could just live next to each, not next to each other, but...
5
SPEAKER_00
Living next to each other, being in the same house together, living together.
5
SPEAKER_00
But you don t actually need to have that ring.
5
SPEAKER_00
But then I fall in love and then I want that because I think it is fun.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love to be the wife.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love calling my husband.
5
SPEAKER_00
So here I go again.
5
SPEAKER_00
I love it.
5
SPEAKER_00
It s optimistic.
5
SPEAKER_00
What?
5
SPEAKER_00
Hold on.
5
SPEAKER_00
Knock on wood.
5
SPEAKER_00
This is going to last forever.
5
SPEAKER_02
Here we go.
5
SPEAKER_02
Lean forward.
5
SPEAKER_02
Chop, chop, chop.
5
SPEAKER_00
Here we go.
5
SPEAKER_00
I always double knock on my head too, just in case that wasn t good enough.
5
SPEAKER_00
I do head as well.
5
SPEAKER_00
You do a head as well?
5
SPEAKER_00
I do if there s no wood.
5
SPEAKER_00
I use it as a backup.
5
SPEAKER_00
But if you have wood, will you do wood and your head?
5
SPEAKER_00
No, but now I will.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I always double up.
5
SPEAKER_00
I double up always on the head.
5
SPEAKER_02
I feel like you guys need to move in with each other.
5
SPEAKER_02
I know, you re so fun.
5
SPEAKER_02
I went on this reality show called Yin and Yang, and it s you two.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I could use some of your optimism.
5
SPEAKER_01
Her glow.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I could use some of that.
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Stay tuned for more Firefighter Expert.
5
SPEAKER_02
I only have like three questions left just to put you at ease.
5
SPEAKER_00
No, I m fine.
5
SPEAKER_02
My interest in your husband.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
5
SPEAKER_02
First of all, he is a guitar player in the band Tokyo Hotel.
5
SPEAKER_02
And his identical twin brother is also in the band.
5
SPEAKER_02
I have to know what it s like to be married to an... Are they identical?
5
SPEAKER_00
They are identical.
5
SPEAKER_02
Tell me about that.
5
SPEAKER_00
But they don t look alike anymore.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were identical when they were younger.
5
SPEAKER_00
And then if you look at photos of them, Bill always had like a different kind of hairstyle.
5
SPEAKER_00
Tom had long dreadlocks and Bill put his hair like spiky with lots of hairspray.
5
SPEAKER_00
They were very different.
5
SPEAKER_00
Also how their clothes were.
5
SPEAKER_00
Tom was always in hip hop clothes.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, you d see the underwear, the pants were really low and he was like slumping around.
5
SPEAKER_00
Bill is like in high heels.
5
SPEAKER_00
He has like long nails.
5
SPEAKER_02
It s very clear who s who.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, they were very, very different.
5
SPEAKER_00
Bill plucks his eyebrows perfectly and Tom s wild.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I feel like if you would strip them completely down and shave the beard and all of that, yes, they would be identical again.
5
SPEAKER_02
But when you re talking to your brother-in-law and you re like looking him in the eyes, do you get tripped out sometimes?
5
SPEAKER_02
I can see my husband in him.
5
SPEAKER_00
No.
5
SPEAKER_02
You don t?
5
SPEAKER_02
That s so interesting.
5
SPEAKER_02
Are their personalities different or similar?
5
SPEAKER_00
Bill is way more bubbly.
5
SPEAKER_00
Bill and I have more of the same personality.
5
SPEAKER_00
Well, that makes sense.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
And is Bill s... He doesn t have a partner at the moment.
5
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
5
SPEAKER_02
Does he need any recommendations?
5
SPEAKER_00
We know about a single...
6
SPEAKER_00
Good to have a good recommendation.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yes!
6
SPEAKER_00
This is how it could all work out.
6
SPEAKER_00
You could marry the brother and then you guys would be sister-in-laws.
6
SPEAKER_00
Married to the same guy that s different.
6
SPEAKER_01
We could also hang out like that, no problem.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s true.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s true.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh man, this is so exciting.
6
SPEAKER_00
What s happening?
6
SPEAKER_01
No, but they re very different.
6
SPEAKER_01
My husband, he s taking more the backseat.
6
SPEAKER_01
Bill always was.
6
SPEAKER_00
More the extrovert.
6
SPEAKER_01
You know, the star of their band because he s the singer.
6
SPEAKER_01
Tom produces the songs and makes the songs, but he writes the songs with Bill.
6
SPEAKER_00
I m just trying to imagine for myself talking to a woman that has the exact same DNA as my wife.
6
SPEAKER_00
My fantasy of that is like very interesting.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, but look up a photo of them.
6
SPEAKER_00
I saw to me just like different hair.
6
SPEAKER_00
If I was looking in their eyes, they have the same eyes.
6
SPEAKER_00
They have the same bone structure of their face and foreheads.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think that s so weird to like look at someone, you know, so insanely intimately and see them yet you don t know that other, you know.
6
SPEAKER_01
I had two sets of twins when I was younger and they were more similar to the point where I had to check out molds in order to see before they open their mouth I would have to check the one has that mold the other one doesn t have that mold but so for me they are not as
6
SPEAKER_02
Twin studies are so interesting for that reason, because it goes to show genetics only count for so much.
6
SPEAKER_00
Right.
6
SPEAKER_02
We just have our own aura.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s so funny because those studies either, it s just like that great movie, Three Identical Strangers.
6
SPEAKER_01
But they do, they finish their sentences.
6
SPEAKER_01
They ve lived their whole life together, traveled the world together.
6
SPEAKER_01
And so when we met, it s the first time they moved apart from each other.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, wow.
6
SPEAKER_00
Does he resent you, Bill?
6
SPEAKER_01
No, but it s the first time that my husband moved away from them living together.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s what I m saying.
6
SPEAKER_00
If I was Bill, I might be pissed at you.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, maybe he loved having more closet space.
6
SPEAKER_00
Or maybe he s so happy that you finally took him in.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he s like, I ve been waiting for this.
6
SPEAKER_00
You dated twins.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I dated twins and then also dated long-term.
6
SPEAKER_00
I mean, Carrie.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yes, fraternal twins, but then also I dated identical twins.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you sure did.
6
SPEAKER_00
Both of them.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh, both at the same time?
6
SPEAKER_00
Not at the same time, at different times.
6
SPEAKER_00
This is like ninth grade and 11th grade.
6
SPEAKER_01
You dated both of them?
6
SPEAKER_00
9th grade and 11th grade.
6
SPEAKER_00
So it s like, time goes by.
6
SPEAKER_00
They re very similar.
6
SPEAKER_00
I like the first one.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s not who I m talking about.
6
SPEAKER_02
You dated another set of twins.
6
SPEAKER_00
Identical twins.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
6
SPEAKER_00
The Olsen twins she s referencing.
6
SPEAKER_01
But never at the same time.
6
SPEAKER_01
No.
6
SPEAKER_00
I did not date Mary-Kate.
6
SPEAKER_00
I just want to be clear.
6
SPEAKER_00
I m not saying I dated Mary-Kate.
6
SPEAKER_00
Oh, fuck.
6
SPEAKER_00
This went off the rails.
6
SPEAKER_00
No, in high school I dated identical twins.
6
SPEAKER_01
I know them very well, too.
6
SPEAKER_00
And dating is loose.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yes, I know that.
6
SPEAKER_00
When I was with Ashley, I want to say she talked very fondly about you at some point.
6
SPEAKER_01
Good.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
They re my heroes.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, they re amazing.
6
SPEAKER_01
You love all the clothes that they make.
6
SPEAKER_00
This is the row.
6
SPEAKER_00
These are the row.
6
SPEAKER_01
These are the row.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, they re very good.
6
SPEAKER_01
But it s also because I feel like they really do this themselves.
6
SPEAKER_01
I know, it s incredible.
6
SPEAKER_01
They always have.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s so admirable.
6
SPEAKER_00
Okay, you ve talked too much about it, but I just have a specific question about it, and that is Halloween.
6
SPEAKER_00
So do you already know this about Heidi, that she goes so hard for Halloween, probably harder than anyone in the world.
6
SPEAKER_01
What rock have you been on?
6
SPEAKER_01
I know, it s so embarrassing.
6
SPEAKER_01
We can still hang out, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
That ll be part of the fun of the reality show.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, not before you have a little look at me when I was a rainworm, okay?
6
SPEAKER_01
A rainworm?
6
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
6
SPEAKER_00
Listen.
6
SPEAKER_01
Please look at my rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_01
Look at me when I was 95 years old.
6
SPEAKER_01
That s also one of my favorites.
6
SPEAKER_01
I turned 40 and people were like, wow, so you were like 40 really old now.
6
SPEAKER_01
You should stop modeling.
6
SPEAKER_01
And then I was like, dang, I guess they re right.
6
SPEAKER_01
And then that got me thinking about, I m going to make myself really old.
6
SPEAKER_01
And that was amazing.
6
SPEAKER_01
It took like 13, 14 hours to make me that old because every part of my skin that was exposed, they had to age.
6
SPEAKER_00
I hate to say this.
6
SPEAKER_00
There will be some listeners that, like Monica, haven t seen the Halloween costumes.
6
SPEAKER_00
I learned of it today.
6
SPEAKER_00
Monica, whatever you re imagining, I can t wait.
6
SPEAKER_00
You have to times it by 10.
6
SPEAKER_00
So she went as whatever she called it, a rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_00
It looks like a fucking intestine.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, a ringworm.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, it looked like a rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_00
A rainworm, okay.
6
SPEAKER_01
Like a real proper rainworm that you see when it s raining and they come out of the ground and they re out there.
6
SPEAKER_00
Or like the lower GI.
6
SPEAKER_00
That is also what a worm looks like.
6
SPEAKER_00
She is in this like nine foot long fucking
6
SPEAKER_01
It looks like an intestine.
6
SPEAKER_00
Her face is gone.
6
SPEAKER_00
Her eyes are poking through.
6
SPEAKER_01
My face was glued onto the walls of it.
6
SPEAKER_01
My hands were tied down to the side of my body.
6
SPEAKER_01
When I would fall over, I couldn t get up.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I said to my husband, please, when I fall over and I m landing on my face, don t leave me on my face because it s loud.
6
SPEAKER_01
People are like, Heidi, over here.
6
SPEAKER_01
Heidi, photo over here.
6
SPEAKER_01
Look over here.
6
SPEAKER_01
So when I m like down, when I m down and I m on my face,
6
SPEAKER_00
But by the way, they wouldn t even know if you were looking over there.
6
SPEAKER_00
I don t want to suffocate.
6
SPEAKER_00
She s gone in this costume, Monica.
6
SPEAKER_00
You can t see her.
6
SPEAKER_00
Do you see it?
6
SPEAKER_00
When I tell you that this costume is as complicated as the Jabba the Hutt costume in Star Wars, it s that level of prosthetic and insanity.
6
SPEAKER_00
Look at her face.
6
SPEAKER_00
Try to find her face.
6
SPEAKER_02
This is incredible.
6
SPEAKER_00
Now that we know what you re doing, so we know that the one costume that s going is 95, and you looked like...
6
SPEAKER_00
You re saying a rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think it happens to look like intestines.
6
SPEAKER_00
Do you think that looks like intestines?
6
SPEAKER_02
I do.
6
SPEAKER_02
Cause I thought you were saying ringworm.
6
SPEAKER_02
That s like an intestinal disease and it could be that too.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
So, but it s a rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_01
I thought it was very clearly a rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_00
No one says rainworm.
6
SPEAKER_00
You just say worm, right?
6
SPEAKER_00
You re talking about the worm that is just in the grass.
6
SPEAKER_01
But there s so many different worms.
6
SPEAKER_01
There certainly are, but- No, there are worms that come out when it rains.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
6
SPEAKER_00
I think in America we don t have that.
6
SPEAKER_00
They come out of the grass and the soil.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_00
No, normal worms.
6
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, normal worms, they come up.
6
SPEAKER_00
And if we want to talk about a different worm- It s not a maggot.
6
SPEAKER_00
Right, but we would say maggot.
6
SPEAKER_01
No, a maggot is not coming out of the ground.
6
SPEAKER_01
A maggot is in food.
6
SPEAKER_01
I know that.
6
SPEAKER_00
In trash cans.
6
SPEAKER_00
What I m telling you is no one would call a maggot a worm.
6
SPEAKER_00
You don t need to differentiate.
6
SPEAKER_01
Right, then you don t say maggot worm.
6
SPEAKER_01
Ah, okay.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s what I m trying to do.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, the light bulb, did you see it?
6
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
6
SPEAKER_00
It went on.
6
SPEAKER_00
It took me a minute.
6
SPEAKER_00
I love this.
6
SPEAKER_00
That s standard, what you were.
6
SPEAKER_02
But I kind of like this.
6
SPEAKER_02
You can call it a rain worm if you want.
6
SPEAKER_00
It s very cute that you re doing it.
6
SPEAKER_02
I thought you always had to specify, like with pasta, linguine.
6
SPEAKER_02
This old version of you is crazy.
6
SPEAKER_00
Now that we ve been brought up to speed about these Halloween costumes, my question is, many, many women on Halloween like to... Dress as a nurse.
6
SPEAKER_00
Well, they like to express a sexiness that they don t otherwise get to do in real life.
6
SPEAKER_00
And I think it s very telling that you went as a, forgive me, an intestine and a 95 year old woman.
6
SPEAKER_00
And my question is, do you think it s because you ve had your fill of being sexy and that now it s like, let s go be a rainworm?
6
SPEAKER_01
For me, it s more creative.
6
SPEAKER_01
I m a creative person.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I also don t want to do costumes that I have seen.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I try to really think outside of the box.
6
SPEAKER_00
You did.
6
SPEAKER_01
You re doing great.
6
SPEAKER_01
Last year, I was like, OK, this worm I know was so epic that I was like, how am I going to top this worm?
6
SPEAKER_01
So then I thought I have to do something with multiple people.
6
SPEAKER_01
I became a peacock where I m just the face in the front body of the peacock and I have like 10 people who were the eyes of the feather in the rest of the body and I m climbing on this and we did this whole beautiful dance until I then become this peacock to just give people something else again where they re like oh my god that s cool or I want people to have an emotion when they see that
6
SPEAKER_01
And I love also when girls want to be a sexy nurse and they feel like they can t do this in their normal life.
6
SPEAKER_01
And then that gives them the freedom, the okay to try something that they normally don t feel comfortable in.
6
SPEAKER_01
I feel like I m kind of always doing the sexy nurse without being the nurse.
6
SPEAKER_01
If I go to a party or walking down the catwalk somewhere.
6
SPEAKER_00
She does the same thing.
6
SPEAKER_00
Kristen s so celebrated for being beautiful that she does things that are so gross that only she would really be comfortable doing.
6
SPEAKER_00
Like she ll wear a bald cap and she looks insane or she has a bathing suit that looks like a man s hairy chest and it s so gross.
6
SPEAKER_02
It is.
6
SPEAKER_02
But she s also said that about her wedding because they got married at the courthouse and she wore just like a cute outfit and people asked like, oh, you didn t want to get dressed up?
6
SPEAKER_02
And she was like, I get to do that a lot for my job.
6
SPEAKER_02
So this got to be a different thing.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
more like art for me.
6
SPEAKER_01
I feel like I m like a live sculpture.
6
SPEAKER_01
One year for example I wanted people to see what it entails.
6
SPEAKER_01
I know I always do like little videos and that I put up there but one year I was putting myself in a window in Manhattan and I started at like 8 o clock in the morning and I had all the artists around me gluing all the stuff on and I m sitting right by the window and people could walk by this window all day long.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s like performance art.
6
SPEAKER_01
All day, they could come by and they could see what happens.
6
SPEAKER_01
Like five, six hours later, I was still sitting there.
6
SPEAKER_01
They were gluing stuff on me because I wanted people to see how this all happens.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s like a sculpture at the end.
6
SPEAKER_01
Then they just rip it all off.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s just for one night and then it s gone.
6
SPEAKER_00
Well, what I like is this reinforces the point you made a few minutes ago, which is like, you just pursue stuff because you pursue them.
6
SPEAKER_00
Sometimes they generate money, sometimes they don t.
6
SPEAKER_00
This is obviously a humongous expense for you to do this.
6
SPEAKER_00
And you re not going to get any money back from doing that.
6
SPEAKER_01
I never have.
6
SPEAKER_01
But you get joy out of it.
6
SPEAKER_01
I do.
6
SPEAKER_00
And you always have something to talk about on talk show in the pinch.
6
SPEAKER_00
All you gotta do is flash that fucking picture and you got like six minutes right there.
6
SPEAKER_01
But I never knew in the beginning how it would grow into that.
6
SPEAKER_01
Over 20 years now, I ve been doing this, maybe 23 years.
6
SPEAKER_00
When do you start planning?
7
SPEAKER_00
And do you go to a specific party every year?
7
SPEAKER_00
I make it.
7
SPEAKER_00
Every year.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s my party.
7
SPEAKER_03
And she has Questlove.
7
SPEAKER_00
Questlove is there every year.
7
SPEAKER_00
I love Quest.
7
SPEAKER_00
Amazing.
7
SPEAKER_00
This is so fun.
7
SPEAKER_03
It is.
7
SPEAKER_00
But when I first came to New York, I didn t feel like there was a party where people are dressing up.
7
SPEAKER_00
You would go to a party and they put a little red clown nose on their nose and then it s like, oh, I m a clown.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, no, you re not.
7
SPEAKER_00
It just was like so boring, you know, I was always like, where is the magic?
7
SPEAKER_00
Why is no one giving it some?
7
SPEAKER_00
So then I was like, I m gonna take that over.
7
SPEAKER_00
I m gonna do this.
7
SPEAKER_00
And as the host, I thought I have to really show people how far you can push your imagination.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I feel like literally every year people who are coming, their costumes also are getting better and better.
7
SPEAKER_00
People are also planning months in advance already.
7
SPEAKER_00
People are DMing me and they re like, Oh my God, I m coming to the party and I m already like, you just wait when you see what I m doing.
7
SPEAKER_03
I get this party.
7
SPEAKER_03
No one can move.
7
SPEAKER_03
No one s arms work.
7
SPEAKER_03
People are falling down staircases.
7
SPEAKER_03
No, my husband, my husband was a gigantic egg because this is like a black mirror episode in a way.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, my husband was like, what am I going to be if you re a peacock?
7
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, well,
7
SPEAKER_00
We re literally sitting at the dinner table and I have this chandelier that has all these eggs hanging off of it.
7
SPEAKER_00
They re real eggs all from Easter.
7
SPEAKER_00
Like we always blow eggs out, you know, poke holes on either side and you blow all the stuff through and then you paint them and then we put them on strings.
7
SPEAKER_00
And so we have like 50 eggs probably on this thing.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I m looking at these eggs.
7
SPEAKER_00
I m like, I think it should be an egg.
7
SPEAKER_00
It should be the peacock s egg.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I know that a peacock is a male and shouldn t have eggs, but that s fine.
7
SPEAKER_03
No one there s gonna be a ornithologist and call you out on that.
7
SPEAKER_00
So he ran around like a gigantic egg.
7
SPEAKER_03
I bet Bill was a bird that year too.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, he was a unicorn.
7
SPEAKER_03
Okay, though, same thing.
7
SPEAKER_03
He married his brother.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_03
That s what happened.
7
SPEAKER_03
He married his brother.
7
SPEAKER_00
Possibly.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
We do these things.
7
SPEAKER_00
In the female version.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
And it makes sense because they seem like soulmates in some ways.
7
SPEAKER_03
Clearly, if they can stay together in a band as brothers, it s impossible.
7
SPEAKER_03
Okay, last thing we re talking about.
7
SPEAKER_03
Last year you did, you hit the deck hard.
7
SPEAKER_00
Where?
7
SPEAKER_03
I m sorry.
7
SPEAKER_00
What s happening?
7
SPEAKER_03
I meant to say, last year you did chai tea with Heidi.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
7
SPEAKER_03
Above that, I had reminded myself that you hit the deck hard walking to your desk on AGT.
7
SPEAKER_03
I want to talk about it, but I don t need to.
7
SPEAKER_03
We ve talked about so much stuff.
7
SPEAKER_00
Now I need to hear about this.
7
SPEAKER_03
She fucking went down.
7
SPEAKER_00
On AGT?
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, and you had to have your leg glued.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, because it s Fantasy League.
7
SPEAKER_00
I swear to God, sometimes I rewind that tape and I m like, there must be Simon Cowell or someone holding that leg out for me.
7
SPEAKER_00
But it actually never happened.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, I fully just fell over or something.
7
SPEAKER_03
I m talking like a timber moment.
7
SPEAKER_00
I went down fast.
7
SPEAKER_00
Did you have to have surgery?
7
SPEAKER_00
No, but they had to come and they had to glue it shut.
7
SPEAKER_00
See?
7
SPEAKER_00
It looks like nothing.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, I see it.
7
SPEAKER_00
It was bleeding and gushing and it s amazing.
7
SPEAKER_00
They have this glue.
7
SPEAKER_00
They just glue it right shut.
7
SPEAKER_00
And you felt fine?
7
SPEAKER_00
They just like went...
7
SPEAKER_03
And then kept on filming.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, it happened at the beginning of the show.
7
SPEAKER_00
I actually felt more embarrassed that everyone had to wait for me because then there was blood everywhere.
7
SPEAKER_00
And then they had to clean the blood.
7
SPEAKER_00
Then they had to clean my leg.
7
SPEAKER_00
Then they had to have someone come.
7
SPEAKER_00
And then they re like, are you sure you re fine?
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, they bring in a blood pathogen person.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, no, I didn t fall on my head.
7
SPEAKER_00
Everything s fine.
7
SPEAKER_00
How do you handle embarrassment?
7
SPEAKER_00
I was more embarrassed of them having to wait on me.
7
SPEAKER_00
Right.
7
SPEAKER_00
The fall didn t bother me so much because there would be more embarrassing things.
7
SPEAKER_00
If I had my period now and I get up and there was a stain right on this couch, I would be embarrassed because this would be like your couch.
7
SPEAKER_00
I would be having to remove this with me.
7
SPEAKER_00
We d be fine with it.
7
SPEAKER_00
I wouldn t care.
7
SPEAKER_00
But like falling doesn t bother me.
7
SPEAKER_03
That cushion would go in a Lucite box and run it to the wall.
7
SPEAKER_03
We would get new couch cushions, but we d keep it and we would write a little.
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes, that s right.
7
SPEAKER_00
We kind of keep everything.
7
SPEAKER_00
Has this ever happened to you?
7
SPEAKER_00
So far, not, but it will.
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, now that we know how late you guys are.
7
SPEAKER_03
No, let s not plan what it will.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, yeah, here we go.
7
SPEAKER_03
Chop, chop, chop, chop, chop.
7
SPEAKER_03
A little knock, knock on the noggin.
7
SPEAKER_03
Okay, now what I meant to say was last year you did chai tea with Heidi with Snoop Dogg, can you believe this again?
7
SPEAKER_03
Talk about the impossible fairy tale, right at no point on this voyage or you re like, you know What I bet I m gonna do is sing a song with Snoop Dogg Out of this world is that I m in the shower and I m singing Rod Stewart song if you want no I like
7
SPEAKER_00
So I m singing in the shower and I m like, why is there not a remix of that song?
7
SPEAKER_00
It would be so cool.
7
SPEAKER_00
Wouldn t it be cool if Snoop Dogg would do this with me?
7
SPEAKER_00
And then I m like, oh my God, why am I not just going to call Snoop Dogg and see if he s into this?
7
SPEAKER_00
I literally call up Snoop Dogg.
7
SPEAKER_00
He s like, where are you at?
7
SPEAKER_00
Well, I m in LA.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he s like, well, come down to Inglewood.
7
SPEAKER_00
So I go to Inglewood.
7
SPEAKER_00
He s like, let s do this thing.
7
SPEAKER_03
Oh my Lord.
7
SPEAKER_00
Can I have his number?
7
SPEAKER_00
Literally, I could not believe it.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s incredible.
7
SPEAKER_00
Whenever you have an idea and you think it s like, good.
7
SPEAKER_00
Now I said idea.
7
SPEAKER_00
My kids are not here.
7
SPEAKER_00
Usually they re like, it s not with an R at the end, mom.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s idea.
7
SPEAKER_03
You should tell them this accident built this fucking house.
7
SPEAKER_03
That would be my response.
7
SPEAKER_00
I have never cursed like that before.
7
SPEAKER_03
I m so sorry.
7
SPEAKER_03
Are you okay?
7
SPEAKER_00
And so this time around I m a huge fan of Tiesto s like I ve gone wherever he goes I m going.
7
SPEAKER_02
Biggest AJ in the world.
7
SPEAKER_00
How old are your daughters again?
7
SPEAKER_02
Nine and ten.
7
SPEAKER_00
Do you have a trampoline?
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
I mean, my kids their entire life have hopped up and down on Tiësto music.
7
SPEAKER_00
It has that deep beat in its EDM.
7
SPEAKER_00
So it s like super fast and my kids are bouncing all over the place.
7
SPEAKER_00
So they grew up with his music.
7
SPEAKER_00
I know and love his music.
7
SPEAKER_00
And when we re in Las Vegas, we go see him in the daytime party, which is also so much fun.
7
SPEAKER_00
And then I said to him, I have a really good idea for a song.
7
SPEAKER_00
And he s like, what is it?
7
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, sunglasses at night.
7
SPEAKER_00
You know, the Corey Hart song.
7
SPEAKER_00
Do you remember that song, Monica?
7
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
7
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh, that was nice.
7
SPEAKER_00
I like what just happened.
7
SPEAKER_03
There s another yin and yang happening in this room.
7
SPEAKER_03
I ve been included.
7
SPEAKER_03
I don t know, because I want to be like you, to cement that we re connected.
7
SPEAKER_02
You might need to practice when.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I m not good at it yet.
7
SPEAKER_03
Does it help that I can t see you?
7
SPEAKER_03
I ve made myself not see you as well, to join you and Monica.
7
SPEAKER_00
We can t see anything.
7
SPEAKER_00
Oh, you have normally glasses?
7
SPEAKER_03
And I haven t had any water since we started.
7
SPEAKER_00
Me either.
7
SPEAKER_00
Shall we have a sip?
7
SPEAKER_03
You re becoming a little more like me, I m becoming a little more like you.
7
SPEAKER_03
I think my favorite part of this interview was when she was talking about him drinking the water, putting the sugar in, and she was miming out the whole thing.
7
SPEAKER_03
And then he s drinking water.
7
SPEAKER_03
You know when she acted out that whole thing?
7
SPEAKER_02
Yes, it was great.
7
SPEAKER_02
I wish we had video for that.
7
SPEAKER_03
Oh, here we go.
7
SPEAKER_02
Oh, liquid death.
7
SPEAKER_03
There you go.
7
SPEAKER_00
Pre-advertisement.
7
SPEAKER_00
Tastes like nothing.
7
SPEAKER_03
Why did I do that?
7
SPEAKER_00
OK, so sunglasses at night.
7
SPEAKER_03
You had heard it and it was stuck in your head or something?
7
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I was born 73.
7
SPEAKER_00
So, yes, songs from the 80s, 90s.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s why also Rod Stewart, I guess.
7
SPEAKER_00
And when I said that to him, his eyes nearly fell out of his head.
7
SPEAKER_00
I could just see his wheels up thinking, why did I not think of that?
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
7
SPEAKER_00
Then we just did it.
7
SPEAKER_03
I just had a brainstorm.
7
SPEAKER_03
I feel like I got hit by lightning just now for your next song.
7
SPEAKER_01
Tell me.
7
SPEAKER_01
We got nothing but time.
7
SPEAKER_01
Culture Club?
7
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but wow.
7
SPEAKER_03
I think you should do Time next year.
7
SPEAKER_03
If you re going down an 80s road, you don t respond to that.
7
SPEAKER_03
You don t like that song.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s not for you.
7
SPEAKER_03
You don t even know it.
7
SPEAKER_03
Do you even know that song?
7
SPEAKER_00
I have to hear the original.
7
SPEAKER_03
You don t think I did a good job?
7
SPEAKER_00
Let me call Snoop and see if he wants that.
7
SPEAKER_00
That was hard for me.
7
SPEAKER_03
Talk to Terry Crews, I don t recognize that too
7
SPEAKER_03
Where s Terry?
7
SPEAKER_03
Let me talk to Terry.
7
SPEAKER_00
I need him to reframe this for me.
7
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that was a hard pass for me.
7
SPEAKER_03
Okay, so what is it like to then go record that song with Tiesto?
7
SPEAKER_00
So I recorded it, sent him my vocals, and then he just built the entire song around it.
7
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
7
SPEAKER_03
To me, this feels like your Halloween thing a little bit.
7
SPEAKER_03
And I think the thing people are mad about or get touchy about is when they re like, you re already a successful this.
7
SPEAKER_03
Why are you trying to do that?
7
SPEAKER_03
What I think is actually happening is this is like your Halloween thing.
7
SPEAKER_03
I want to make this song.
7
SPEAKER_03
I m not trying to fucking get rich off an album.
7
SPEAKER_00
No, she s just following.
7
SPEAKER_00
To be honest with you, people have to stream gazillion times your song in order for you to get a thousand dollars.
7
SPEAKER_00
Let s say you have to have one or two million streams.
7
SPEAKER_00
So you really have to have a lot of people stream your stuff.
7
SPEAKER_00
in order for you to actually get anything.
7
SPEAKER_00
And you have to tour when you do music.
7
SPEAKER_00
That s how you make your money.
7
SPEAKER_00
It s really just the passion of it.
7
SPEAKER_00
And I really thought they need that song out there.
7
SPEAKER_00
I mean, how many times do you wish in the middle of the night you have a pair of sunglasses or how many times do you see people with sunglasses?
7
SPEAKER_00
because you ve been out for too long your eyes are already wonky maybe your makeup is not looking too cute anymore so it s always good to wear some sunglasses when you have glasses on it s almost like you can hide behind it a little bit so you can be maybe a little bit more free people can
8
SPEAKER_00
can t look you in the eye.
8
SPEAKER_02
Although you wearing sunglasses seems like a real waste of a thing.
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, sometimes she needs to keep them for herself.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I guess that s what it is.
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe they re mirrored on the inside and she just stares at them herself and enjoys them.
8
SPEAKER_00
Just looking at myself.
8
SPEAKER_02
And make them dance and smile.
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe that s what you should be doing.
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, this was a fucking party.
8
SPEAKER_02
I didn t know what to expect.
8
SPEAKER_00
I didn t know what to expect either.
8
SPEAKER_02
What would you rate this out of 10, the experience?
8
SPEAKER_00
10 yeah, I meet you I might even try to go 11 out of 10 because also I don t listen to podcasts at all Well, you clearly don t have time to do.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, exactly.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s not even necessarily like a time thing.
8
SPEAKER_00
I just don t watch TV either.
8
SPEAKER_00
Yeah Well, your brain is too busy.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s gonna be a lot of you guys in the reality show.
8
SPEAKER_01
I know but I don t
8
SPEAKER_01
I don t watch that much TV.
8
SPEAKER_01
I don t.
8
SPEAKER_02
I really don t.
8
SPEAKER_01
Only if I m binging something.
8
SPEAKER_02
You will watch Contagion six times in a row.
8
SPEAKER_01
That was during the pandemic only when it was on brand.
8
SPEAKER_02
Don t listen to her.
8
SPEAKER_02
She watches a ton of TV and movies.
8
SPEAKER_02
She gets great comfort out of it and you shouldn t feel ashamed of it.
8
SPEAKER_02
I don t feel ashamed of it.
8
SPEAKER_00
I never like anything.
8
SPEAKER_00
My husband is like, what did you think of this?
8
SPEAKER_00
And I m like, meh.
8
SPEAKER_02
Name one thing you liked.
8
SPEAKER_00
I liked Maestro.
8
SPEAKER_00
Okay, Maestro, shout out.
8
SPEAKER_00
I felt like that was a really good movie.
8
SPEAKER_02
What about White Lotus?
8
SPEAKER_00
I watched that.
8
SPEAKER_00
I watched both seasons.
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, if you watch both seasons, you couldn t have hated the first.
8
SPEAKER_00
Well, because there s other shows where I watched one season and then the second season came and I m like, it s just more of the same.
8
SPEAKER_00
And then I get bored when it s a lot of the same again.
8
SPEAKER_00
What about Squid Game s Challenge?
8
SPEAKER_00
Ooh, I did watch a little bit of the Squid Game.
8
SPEAKER_00
With your boys, probably, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
We watched it as a family.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s fun, right?
8
SPEAKER_00
I mean, are you talking about now when they do this with real people?
8
SPEAKER_00
Yes, the new one.
8
SPEAKER_00
The reality show.
8
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no, I haven t watched that.
8
SPEAKER_02
You should watch it with your kids.
8
SPEAKER_00
It s fun.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s a great family show.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, because everyone can get sucked into the thing.
8
SPEAKER_02
But what s an even better family show?
8
SPEAKER_02
America s Got Talent.
8
SPEAKER_01
That s right.
8
100%.
8
SPEAKER_02
Fantasy League.
8
SPEAKER_02
Everyone should check it out on Mondays at 8 p.m.
8
SPEAKER_02
Eastern Pacific on NBC and the next day on Peacock.
8
SPEAKER_02
Peacock, ding, ding, ding, your outfit.
8
SPEAKER_00
They were very excited that I was a peacock.
8
SPEAKER_02
I bet they were.
8
SPEAKER_02
They should have actually paid for that cost.
8
SPEAKER_01
They should have, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_01
I hope we did Jennifer Love proud.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, me too.
8
SPEAKER_01
I hope she enjoys this.
8
SPEAKER_02
Jen Love, we love you.
8
SPEAKER_00
I love you the most.
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, we haven t met you yet.
8
SPEAKER_02
Heidi, this has been so fun.
8
SPEAKER_02
I hope we get to do it again.
8
SPEAKER_02
Good luck with everything.
8
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
8
SPEAKER_02
All right.
8
SPEAKER_00
Bye-bye.
8
SPEAKER_02
Stick around for the fact check.
8
SPEAKER_01
Because they re human, they make lots of mistakes.
8
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
Something horrible happened.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh no, what?
8
SPEAKER_02
You seem kind of in a good mood for horrible.
8
SPEAKER_02
Delirious.
8
SPEAKER_02
It s an interesting read on the line.
8
SPEAKER_02
Something horrible happened.
8
SPEAKER_01
I make interesting acting choices.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I know.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s what s kept you employed for all these years.
8
SPEAKER_01
That s right.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yesterday, I was so tired.
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, you don t know about something that happened this weekend.
8
SPEAKER_01
Oh Easter egg.
8
SPEAKER_01
I talked about it on the sink to next week.
8
SPEAKER_01
Okay, but I basically was on a martini adventure this weekend Oh of making my own like learning how okay in the home not like a pub crawl martini in the home What we call a martini crawl a martini March Sounds
8
SPEAKER_02
to Nazi.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
Marches.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
8
SPEAKER_02
They ve kind of, they ve taken March.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s a bummer cause it s also for like activists.
8
SPEAKER_02
So you wanted to make a martini at home?
8
SPEAKER_01
I ve been making martini.
8
SPEAKER_01
I made two martinis this weekend.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I m, I m practice.
8
SPEAKER_01
I want to be good at it.
8
SPEAKER_02
I m so sorry, how could it be that hard?
8
SPEAKER_02
You re mixing two, three items in a glass?
8
SPEAKER_02
There s no baking, there s no whipping, there s no?
8
SPEAKER_01
There s an art to it, and there s two kinds.
8
SPEAKER_01
There s a kind that you stir.
8
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then there s a kind that you shake.
8
SPEAKER_02
Shake, that s how 007 likes it, shake and not stir.
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, exactly, but it s knowing which ones are better stirred and which are better shaken.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
And there s a country mall.
8
SPEAKER_01
I use a lemon twist and you have this long stir and it s like curled.
8
SPEAKER_01
The stirrer is.
8
SPEAKER_02
The glass stirrer?
8
SPEAKER_02
No, it s metal.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s metal.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s long.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s for your stirring apparatus.
8
SPEAKER_01
And then you cut a little bit of lemon and you twist it on the curly and that s how you make it curly.
8
SPEAKER_01
And you have to do it over the glass and you have to get the aromas out.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s a whole thing.
8
SPEAKER_02
Wow, a lot of pressure.
8
SPEAKER_01
You have to chill your glass.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s really fun.
8
SPEAKER_01
But I also made an espresso martini.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay, fun.
8
SPEAKER_01
And that has a lot more going on, right?
8
SPEAKER_01
And that one requires a shaker, which I didn t have.
8
SPEAKER_02
I m shocked.
8
SPEAKER_01
I know.
8
SPEAKER_01
So I made it this weekend with the stirring apparatus and it was good.
8
SPEAKER_01
It tasted very good, but it didn t have what it didn t have that like foam on top.
8
SPEAKER_02
Well, that s what you re looking for is a froth.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, for that kind.
8
SPEAKER_02
After this, I m gonna tell you how to make a Jack and Diane.
8
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
I hope there are aromas involved.
8
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
8
SPEAKER_02
Jack is very pungent.
8
SPEAKER_01
So I was with Jess on Monday, I think, and we went looking for a martini shaker and the city was sold out.
8
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
8
SPEAKER_01
No martini shakers.
8
SPEAKER_01
But then I was at Cara, we went to Cara after the martini hunt, martini march.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I brought up, I was looking for a martini shaker and the nice manager said, oh, you should go to Bar Keeper or Bar Keepers or something in Silver Lake.
8
SPEAKER_01
So then yesterday I took a nap, I was so tired.
8
SPEAKER_02
Really winded.
8
SPEAKER_01
I was, I took a nap at 3.30.
8
SPEAKER_01
How long to go?
8
SPEAKER_01
425, but I wanted to sleep for the rest of the night.
8
SPEAKER_02
You did, you were gassed.
8
SPEAKER_01
Exhausted.
8
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
8
SPEAKER_01
I have January Lyme s disease.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
Seasonal Lyme?
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but luckily tomorrow I should be better.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay, that s unsynced.
8
SPEAKER_01
Nope, it s just today s the last day of January.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay, okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
I was so tired, but I had a lot to do.
8
SPEAKER_01
I had to do two full edits.
8
SPEAKER_02
Ooh.
8
SPEAKER_01
And I thought, fuck, I m gonna need a pick-me-up.
8
SPEAKER_02
Uh-huh, this is dangerous.
8
SPEAKER_01
I went to Bar Keepers, whatever that place is.
8
SPEAKER_01
They had a martini shaker, bought it, brought it home.
8
SPEAKER_02
I love that you woke up, you were groggy, and you re like, God, I have so much to do.
8
SPEAKER_02
I gotta go get a martini shaker to get going.
8
SPEAKER_01
Because I thought, you know what would be a fun pick-me-up?
8
SPEAKER_01
Espresso martini.
8
SPEAKER_01
A little late in the day, no?
8
SPEAKER_02
Or does it offset the alcohol offsets?
8
SPEAKER_01
You re way ahead.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay, sorry.
8
SPEAKER_02
That s a bad habit of mine from Armchair Anonymous.
8
SPEAKER_01
So I make the espresso martini.
8
SPEAKER_01
It s perfect with the shaker.
8
SPEAKER_01
It has the froth.
8
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s so good.
8
SPEAKER_01
And it s tricky because there s like two ounces of espresso in there.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
8
SPEAKER_01
But I don t think about that because it s a little chocolatey and yummy.
8
SPEAKER_01
I use a little chocolate liqueur in there.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh my gosh.
8
SPEAKER_01
So good.
8
SPEAKER_01
So happy.
8
SPEAKER_01
I decide
8
SPEAKER_02
Have a second.
8
SPEAKER_01
I have another entire edit to go.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I don t think this is like doing that much I ll make one more.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh boy.
8
SPEAKER_01
This is that like
8
SPEAKER_02
Second shot of espresso.
8
7.30.
8
SPEAKER_02
This is so reckless.
8
SPEAKER_01
I didn t think about it.
8
SPEAKER_02
Did you not think about it, or did you choose not to think about it?
8
SPEAKER_01
No, this is what I thought.
8
SPEAKER_01
I only thought about the alcohol.
8
SPEAKER_02
Okay, right, and you re like, well, that ll make me drowsy.
8
SPEAKER_01
Well, no, I was like, should I have another martini that s another two ounces of vodka?
8
SPEAKER_01
Should I do that?
8
SPEAKER_01
It s fine.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, right, yeah, yeah.
8
SPEAKER_01
I didn t think at all about the espresso.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh boy.
8
SPEAKER_01
Because I m not that well versed in espresso and caffeine and stuff.
8
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, you re new to it still.
8
SPEAKER_01
Fuck.
8
SPEAKER_01
So I drink it all and I do the whole thing.
8
SPEAKER_01
I finish at 1030.
8
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
8
SPEAKER_01
I was like, this is great.
8
SPEAKER_01
Go to bed at 1115.
8
SPEAKER_02
Maybe listen to the same podcast for a minute.
8
SPEAKER_01
Exactly.
8
SPEAKER_01
Then I ll re-listen and then I ll be asleep by 11.15.
8
SPEAKER_01
That s when I was like, I feel kind of like...
8
SPEAKER_01
Weird.
8
SPEAKER_01
I guess it s the, and I thought, I was like, am I drunk?
8
SPEAKER_01
I wasn t drunk at all.
8
SPEAKER_02
So much espressos, that s why you do coke while you drink.
8
SPEAKER_02
It keeps you straight.
8
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I was like, well, I m not drunk, but what s this feeling?
8
SPEAKER_01
And then I remembered, oh no.
8
SPEAKER_01
I don t, I didn t really sleep last night.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God.
8
SPEAKER_02
Money.
8
SPEAKER_02
You re going to turn into a little monster.
8
SPEAKER_02
I feel crazy.
8
SPEAKER_01
I feel like I still, I still in me the caffeine.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God.
8
SPEAKER_02
You re going to have to have another, this is how you become an alcoholic.
8
SPEAKER_02
You re going to have to maintain now for the rest of the day.
8
SPEAKER_01
I thought this, I was like, I m gonna crash so hard, but I don t, I can t, I don t have time, so I ll probably have to drink another coffee or make another espresso martini, but I ll probably just drink coffee.
8
SPEAKER_02
You might need the booze to take the edge off.
8
SPEAKER_02
This is like a speedball, basically.
8
SPEAKER_02
Oh.
8
SPEAKER_02
You feel like I felt for years, years I felt like you.
8
SPEAKER_00
This is how you felt?
8
SPEAKER_02
For years, like I would go to the groundlings on Sunday for the show and I would have to drink like literally
8
SPEAKER_02
50s 60s.
9
SPEAKER_01
60 ounces of coffee to rebound from the previous night of drug use, terrible sleep.
9
SPEAKER_01
And I d have to rally and I d be kind of, you re kind of altered.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but I don t want to live like this anymore.
9
SPEAKER_01
No, you learned your lesson.
9
SPEAKER_01
You shouldn t have espresso in the evening.
9
SPEAKER_00
But would one have been fine?
9
SPEAKER_01
I don t know what your tolerance is.
9
SPEAKER_01
For me, absolutely not.
9
SPEAKER_01
If I have a shot of espresso, unless I m in Italy on vacation, then nothing, I m inoculated from all things.
9
SPEAKER_01
I can eat gluten.
9
SPEAKER_01
They say it s different.
9
SPEAKER_01
Maybe that s the case, maybe not.
9
SPEAKER_01
But I can also drink an espresso late in the day and I m fine.
9
SPEAKER_01
So I m on vacation.
9
SPEAKER_01
But in real life, that s way too late for an espresso.
9
SPEAKER_01
For me, anything after three, I m asking for trouble.
9
SPEAKER_00
that early?
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_01
Well, it takes, depending on how you metabolize caffeine, everyone s different, but generally speaking, it takes 12 hours for your body to consume all the caffeine.
9
SPEAKER_00
Are espresso martinis for the morning?
9
SPEAKER_00
That doesn t even make sense.
9
SPEAKER_01
No, but, well, no, it doesn t, but you have to, well, first of all, Italians do drink espresso all night long.
9
SPEAKER_01
They have it after dinner.
9
SPEAKER_01
I don t know how they do that.
9
SPEAKER_01
Also, people drink Red Bull and vodka.
9
SPEAKER_01
So people are often trying to have a lot of caffeine with their alcohol to, you know, stave off the drowsiness.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_01
Is stave off a word?
9
SPEAKER_01
Am I using that correctly?
9
SPEAKER_00
I think so.
9
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_01
Stir is a tough word for me.
9
SPEAKER_00
Stir?
9
SPEAKER_01
You ve said it so many times.
9
SPEAKER_01
I wanna say steer or stir.
9
SPEAKER_01
Really?
9
SPEAKER_01
Steer, the steer.
9
SPEAKER_00
Say the sentence.
9
SPEAKER_01
I steered up, I steered up a potta.
9
SPEAKER_01
I stirred up, I stirred up.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s a tough one.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then when I m trying to spell it when I m writing, it s tough.
9
SPEAKER_01
Because is it E-R?
9
SPEAKER_01
I don t even know like phonetically how you d actually spell it, right?
9
SPEAKER_00
Because you want it to be Stire or something?
9
SPEAKER_01
Well, right, how do you say it?
9
SPEAKER_00
Stir.
9
SPEAKER_01
Stir.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, maybe it s the like weird R. Like it should be S-T-U-R?
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh, it could be S-T-U-R, mm-hmm.
9
SPEAKER_01
Right?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, stir.
9
SPEAKER_01
I don t think I. Then I think I, I think steer.
9
SPEAKER_01
I don t know, is it steer?
9
SPEAKER_00
Rep it, if it was steer, it would be S-T-E-E-R.
9
E-E-E.
9
SPEAKER_01
E-E-E.
9
SPEAKER_00
And if it was Stire, it would be S-T-I-R-E.
9
SPEAKER_01
Oh, this is like a game, a puzzle game we played.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yes, we went on a really fun podcast, AJ Jacobs.
9
SPEAKER_01
I m gonna toot my own horn.
9
SPEAKER_01
That joke I came up with at the end of the podcast one, I couldn t believe I came up with it as it was coming out of my mouth.
9
SPEAKER_01
So the premise of this game we were playing was you re gonna change a single letter in the name of a popular podcast.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then there would be a clue.
9
SPEAKER_01
So like one was such and such and such and this host and procurer of green colored citrus.
9
SPEAKER_01
So then it was this American life, but you change it to this American lime and you just change the F and the M.
9
SPEAKER_01
And we did about five of them.
9
SPEAKER_01
And I said to him, you know, I wasted all this time trying to figure out when the smart list clue was coming out because a popular podcast is we re going to hear a smart list.
9
SPEAKER_01
And he s like, yeah, but there s there s no letter you can change in smart list to make it another word.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then I immediately said these three hosts never have accidents in their underwear.
9
SPEAKER_01
Shartless.
9
SPEAKER_01
You know, I thought you were like this.
9
SPEAKER_00
I did, I did.
9
SPEAKER_01
You just don t like me bringing it up.
9
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
9
SPEAKER_01
Okay, well how do I share that joke with everyone?
9
SPEAKER_01
Because it s worth sharing.
9
SPEAKER_00
I think sometimes, you know that thing you taught your kids about let other people brag for you?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_00
But you didn t think I would ever brag for you about that.
9
SPEAKER_01
Well, I just, I wanted people to hear shartless in that setup.
9
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_01
So I don t know how to do that.
9
SPEAKER_01
Like I want everyone to hear that.
9
SPEAKER_01
You should ask AJ for the clip of it and then you can post it.
9
SPEAKER_00
Exactly, that s a great way to do it.
9
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_00
Anyway, what s up with you?
9
SPEAKER_00
How was your evening?
9
SPEAKER_00
Did you stay up all night?
9
SPEAKER_01
No, in fact, I went to bed quite early.
9
SPEAKER_01
I had a doctor s appointment.
9
SPEAKER_01
Good news, no skin cancer.
9
SPEAKER_00
Good.
9
SPEAKER_01
Full scan, everything s golden.
9
SPEAKER_01
Also made an appointment for the full body scan that I m gonna have this Saturday morning.
9
SPEAKER_00
What an ethical dilemma.
9
SPEAKER_01
It is tricky.
9
SPEAKER_01
I m very excited to have it and naturally nervous.
9
SPEAKER_01
You go rooting around looking through the whole body, what are we going to find?
9
SPEAKER_01
But of course, I feel very good.
9
SPEAKER_01
So I m like, if I have something, now s the time to have something.
9
SPEAKER_01
Because if I started some kind of treatment for anything, I m already in great shape.
9
SPEAKER_01
I m not waiting until I m sick and run down from something.
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but it s that whole question.
9
SPEAKER_00
They invented this question on an episode of Scrubs.
9
SPEAKER_01
I remember that.
9
SPEAKER_00
It was such a big episode.
9
SPEAKER_00
Was it their biggest episode?
9
SPEAKER_00
One of.
9
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_00
The wedding was also big.
9
SPEAKER_00
Okay.
9
SPEAKER_00
Ding, ding, ding, Bill Lawrence.
9
SPEAKER_00
Ding, ding, ding, Noah Hawley.
9
SPEAKER_00
Ding, ding, ding, Sarah Lawrence.
9
SPEAKER_00
What if they tell you that we see something, it could turn into something.
9
SPEAKER_00
Right.
9
SPEAKER_00
But there s nothing you can do.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yes, so yes, I m very well aware of that.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s hard to know when they spot some kind of a mass or a tumor, whether that is a fast-spreading one or is that something that s gonna be almost dormant in your body until you re dead.
9
SPEAKER_01
Obviously, you don t wanna go in surgically and remove something that is not growing, but that s fine, because if you saw something, it s not like we go in there and cut it out.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s like, okay, great, in a year, I get another full-body scan, and we will know whether it s growing or not.
9
SPEAKER_01
So it s great info to have, not to act immediately, but to be able to track whatever weird things are happening nearby to see if they re spreading or getting worse.
9
SPEAKER_00
I mean, okay, so we have a friend, I don t know how much I can reveal about this, but we have a friend who has a relative who has essentially been diagnosed with, I think, leukemia.
9
SPEAKER_00
Or Hodge, no leukemia, I think it s leukemia.
9
SPEAKER_00
But it s like this, right?
9
SPEAKER_00
Like it hasn t developed yet.
9
SPEAKER_01
Right.
9
SPEAKER_00
But they have said it s coming.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
9
SPEAKER_00
There s nothing you can do.
9
SPEAKER_01
Right.
9
SPEAKER_00
So now everyone s just sort of sitting with, well, this is coming.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and that sucks.
9
SPEAKER_01
But the upside is, is a lot of people with leukemia will ignore symptoms probably for six months.
9
SPEAKER_01
Like they ll be exhausted.
9
SPEAKER_01
So by the time they re going in there to treat it, the thing has the upper hand.
9
SPEAKER_00
It s true.
9
SPEAKER_00
Then you re more aware.
9
SPEAKER_01
So many cancers are operable for a period of time and then they re inoperable.
9
SPEAKER_01
So like my father s lung cancer was inoperable.
9
SPEAKER_01
They would have to remove all of his lungs.
9
SPEAKER_01
But there was a moment in time where they could have gone in and cut out a portion of his lung and then he wouldn t have had it.
9
SPEAKER_01
So that s what I m most interested in.
9
SPEAKER_00
I guess it just, it could be 10 years down the road.
9
SPEAKER_00
And then for 10 years, it s like, when is the shoe gonna drop?
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, that s true.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s just another mental challenge to like stay in today.
9
SPEAKER_01
And there s so many of those already that I m juggling, you know?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_01
Anyways, I m excited for that.
9
SPEAKER_01
Mostly I m excited at the notion is I might get a full scan and be like, you are fucking tip top at 49.
9
SPEAKER_01
That would be great.
9
SPEAKER_01
That would counteract my other narrative, which is everyone that s male in my family dies young.
9
SPEAKER_00
Right.
9
SPEAKER_01
Which I wouldn t mind some data points.
9
SPEAKER_01
Oh, I know what I was gonna say.
9
SPEAKER_01
We went through the same thing when we did 23andMe.
9
SPEAKER_01
Like you are rolling the dice, you re gonna find out you have some genetic stuff you can t really control.
9
SPEAKER_01
Do you remember when we took it?
9
SPEAKER_01
And you re kind of like, we were both like, I don t know if I want to do this.
9
SPEAKER_01
What s better, to know or to not know?
9
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
9
SPEAKER_01
But I think it s a little crazy to say not know is better.
9
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I don t know.
9
SPEAKER_00
I don t judge people for choosing to just like, let s just ride it out.
9
SPEAKER_00
Let s just do life.
9
SPEAKER_01
Sure, sure, sure, sure.
9
SPEAKER_01
And I don t judge people when they take a course of action or treatment that
9
SPEAKER_01
Doesn t prolong their life the most for many people the choice will be when they get diagnosed with cancer.
9
SPEAKER_01
Let s not treat it It s we re gonna be a very marginal extension and it s gonna lower my quality of life With what little time I have left and I totally I m in an agreement with that at any rate did that
9
SPEAKER_01
came home, took the girls to their music lesson, which was really funny for me.
9
SPEAKER_01
I haven t taken them before.
9
SPEAKER_01
And I got to meet their two music teachers and it s just hysterical to watch them walk in a door with a cello and a guitar.
9
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, I don t think they don t know neither.
9
SPEAKER_01
these things and here they are.
9
SPEAKER_00
That s how they learn.
9
SPEAKER_01
I know, it s just really funny.
9
SPEAKER_01
They re humans.
9
SPEAKER_01
They have instruments they re going somewhere with.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s really funny.
9
SPEAKER_01
I enjoyed it.
9
SPEAKER_01
And then we laid in bed and listened to Hunger Games, which they re listening to, which is very fun for me to listen to because I loved it when I first got it read to me so many years ago.
9
SPEAKER_01
It was so fun.
9
SPEAKER_00
Oh yeah, Kristen read it to you.
9
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, a long time ago.
9
SPEAKER_01
And so I m remembering how much I liked that book.
9
SPEAKER_01
Then put them down, then finish the last episode of, and this is a very important topic for us to talk about.
9
SPEAKER_01
I know all of America s talking about it, American Nightmare.
9
SPEAKER_01
Have you started it?
9
SPEAKER_00
No.
9
SPEAKER_01
Have you, Rob?
9
SPEAKER_01
It s number one on Netflix.
9
SPEAKER_01
Everyone s talking about it.
9
SPEAKER_01
It s a three-part documentary.
9
SPEAKER_01
And to remind you, maybe you remember from the news, I just vaguely did.
9
SPEAKER_01
A woman was kidnapped from her bedroom.
9
SPEAKER_01
She was laying with her boyfriend.
9
SPEAKER_01
The first episode is very much about that.
9
SPEAKER_01
She s missing.
9
SPEAKER_01
They re interrogating the boy and they re very much of the belief he has murdered her and there was no kidnapping.
9
SPEAKER_01
And they were calling it in the media and it was on everything.
9
SPEAKER_01
It was on the Today Show and everyone was like, the whole nation was talking about the real Gone Girl case.
9
SPEAKER_00
So it was recent.
10
SPEAKER_00
It was not terribly long ago, I wanna say 2014 or something.
10
2015.
10
SPEAKER_00
2015.
10
SPEAKER_00
This doc has like the three craziest twists and turns.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s so good.
10
SPEAKER_00
And I finished that at like 9.30 and I was asleep before 10.
10
SPEAKER_00
Very rare for me.
10
SPEAKER_00
Are you starting to get tired right now?
10
SPEAKER_00
No, I m still very much awake Tell me about your night of sleep.
10
SPEAKER_00
Like what were you getting an hour here in an hour?
10
SPEAKER_00
Did you give up and start watching TV at any point?
10
SPEAKER_00
No, I didn t.
10
SPEAKER_01
You laid in bed for eight hours Yeah, I mean, I m sure I slept some but I don t know and for so many hours I had this crazy spiral about my outfits
10
SPEAKER_01
Mmm for these parties that are approaching Yes, and then I kept like I just was trying to decide what my outfits were gonna be but it was manic Uh-huh, but I couldn t turn it off.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah compulsive and yeah, I mean induced by all this caffeine.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah Yeah, we re like you were telling yourself to stop thinking about your outfits, but you couldn t yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh my god
10
SPEAKER_01
All right, I have a lot of facts actually.
10
SPEAKER_00
Okay, let s go.
10
SPEAKER_01
This is for Heidi Klum.
10
SPEAKER_01
We had so much fun with Heidi.
10
SPEAKER_00
Playing it fast and loose with the facts.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh, she was fun.
10
SPEAKER_01
She was right about how the pear gets into the schnapps bottle.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
10
SPEAKER_01
They attach it, the pear grows inside the bottle.
10
SPEAKER_01
They stick the bottles over a budding pear tree branch and secure them with wires and gardeners tape and they wait for the buds to grow into the pear inside the glass.
10
SPEAKER_00
I want that, but it s alcohol, right?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you can t have that.
10
SPEAKER_01
We could make one for you that s just pear.
10
SPEAKER_00
Right, oh, back to the Jack and Diet.
10
SPEAKER_00
Three ice cubes, drop them in, fill the glass a third full of Jack Daniels and the remaining two thirds with Diet Coke.
10
SPEAKER_00
No need to stir, no need to shake.
10
SPEAKER_01
No need to stir.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
You have to stir.
10
SPEAKER_00
Before you take a sip, you spin around the ice inside.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, you swirl?
10
SPEAKER_00
Swirl, swirl.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, you have to tell those parts.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s a huge part.
10
SPEAKER_00
I ll say swirled, not stirred.
10
SPEAKER_01
Have you ever shaken a Jack and Diet?
10
SPEAKER_00
No, because it would blow up because the carbonation of the diet.
10
SPEAKER_00
You can t shake it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I m going to try it.
10
SPEAKER_00
Also a smarter move, but I never did it this way, would be to put the diet coke in first because I think the whiskey is heavier.
10
SPEAKER_01
So it would then naturally... You have a lot of research that you can t do that you should have done.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I know.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, this is the episode where the garage opened a lot.
10
SPEAKER_00
And can you hear it?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, except it only happened once out loud.
10
SPEAKER_00
Okay, well, we did a fact check afterwards and that might ve been when it really took off.
10
SPEAKER_01
Maybe.
10
SPEAKER_01
No, it happened during the interview a few times.
10
SPEAKER_01
I don t know why.
10
SPEAKER_01
But you just can t hear it.
10
SPEAKER_01
No, we acknowledge it once.
10
SPEAKER_01
Well, she was like, what s that noise?
10
SPEAKER_01
Is that going to mess up the audio or the sound?
10
SPEAKER_01
And he says, probably my wife trying to blast her buns.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
10
SPEAKER_01
But it wasn t.
10
SPEAKER_00
It was you blasting the remote with your buns.
10
SPEAKER_01
I guess so.
10
SPEAKER_00
In the chair.
10
SPEAKER_00
For people who don t remember, the remote had been sandwiched between the folds of Monica s Lazy Boy, and every time she moved around, it opened and closed it.
10
SPEAKER_00
After I had accused every member of my family of doing it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I know, and I feel weird about that because I feel like it s my fault, but it s definitely not my fault.
10
SPEAKER_00
Well, you didn t put the clicker for the garage in there.
10
SPEAKER_01
I had no idea.
10
SPEAKER_00
But you were activating it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I was activating it, but I didn t even, I don t touch the garage opener.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s not in your purview.
10
SPEAKER_01
At all.
10
SPEAKER_01
So the idea that it would ever be in my chair,
10
SPEAKER_00
Same, that s why I never, you know, look.
10
SPEAKER_01
Now you said, you were saying a bunch of magazines, you said Marie Callender, that is- A restaurant.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yep, that s a deli.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was a great salad bar.
10
SPEAKER_01
Salad bar, cafeteria.
10
SPEAKER_00
Really good potato cheese soup there.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_00
Marie and I would go on our birthdays.
10
SPEAKER_01
You met Marie Claire.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s right.
10
SPEAKER_01
Some people say Marie Claire.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, they do?
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and I think that might be right, but it s kind of like- Bougie.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s like Neanderthal.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, okay.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I looked up, does anxious sweat, like stress sweat, smell more than regular sweat?
10
SPEAKER_01
When the body is reacting to an emotion like anxiety, stress, or excitement, sweat is released from the apocrine glands.
10
SPEAKER_01
These glands produce a milkier sweat comprised of fatty acids and proteins.
10
SPEAKER_01
The apocrine glands are found near dense pockets of hair follicles under the arms, around the groin,
10
SPEAKER_01
and on the scalp.
10
SPEAKER_01
While this type of sweat is initially odorless, it doesn t evaporate as quickly and can develop an odor when it combines with bacteria on the skin.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh boy, I don t like the idea of milky sweat.
10
SPEAKER_00
Me either.
10
SPEAKER_00
The grody.
10
SPEAKER_01
But that s what happens.
10
SPEAKER_00
I immediately think of Tilda Swinton in my favorite movie, Michael Clayton, where she has to go into the bathroom to dab her armpits and it is a mess.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s like someone threw a bucket of water on each.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oof.
10
SPEAKER_00
And I think that was probably.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was milky.
10
SPEAKER_00
Milky and.
10
SPEAKER_00
Sticky.
10
SPEAKER_01
And pucey.
10
SPEAKER_00
Pucey, very pucey.
10
SPEAKER_01
That s an Easter egg.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, FKK, what does it mean?
10
SPEAKER_01
Because that s the nudist.
10
SPEAKER_01
It means free body culture.
10
SPEAKER_00
Free body culture.
10
SPEAKER_01
It s German.
10
SPEAKER_00
FBK?
10
SPEAKER_01
It s FKK, because in German it s.
10
SPEAKER_01
Bodies.
10
SPEAKER_01
Freikultur.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay.
10
SPEAKER_00
I don t think I brought this up in the interview, but I saw her talking about it in other interviews.
10
SPEAKER_00
Her father filmed her delivery.
10
SPEAKER_01
Oh wow.
10
SPEAKER_00
Which falls in line with this totally different relationship.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, interesting.
10
SPEAKER_01
I think sometimes people used to do that.
10
SPEAKER_00
The dads would film the daughters.
10
SPEAKER_01
Or like a baby, it wasn t, oh, her birth.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yes, the father came to her delivering her children and filmed.
10
Oh.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I was a little shocked you weren t a little more, because all the previous American interviewers were a little bit like, ooh, for us, that s great.
10
SPEAKER_01
It sounded like her birth.
10
SPEAKER_00
No, from her own mother, no, no, no.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh.
10
SPEAKER_00
Her father videotaped her birth.
10
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
Very open.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
10
SPEAKER_01
Her vagina.
10
SPEAKER_00
Figuratively and literally and emotionally.
10
SPEAKER_00
One of my favorite thing is that she s so savvy and smart.
10
SPEAKER_00
She knows that s for Americans, that s a wild thing to say.
10
SPEAKER_00
And she ll just go on a talk show and be like, yeah, yeah, my father filmed it.
10
SPEAKER_01
She s very comfortable.
10
SPEAKER_00
Incredibly.
10
SPEAKER_01
She s awesome.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I looked up pedophile percentage by country because you were talking about perversions.
10
SPEAKER_01
And I said, like about all this nudist stuff, is it a bit scary because there are predators?
10
SPEAKER_01
And then you said, well.
10
SPEAKER_00
I think, yeah, I think it s the opposite personally.
10
SPEAKER_01
Well, you say that, but also you are a person who you d look.
10
SPEAKER_00
Because I m from this culture, I m not German.
10
SPEAKER_00
Like what I notice is when you re in the park and everyone s naked or I m in the sauna and everyone s naked, I m the only person activated or curious or looking around.
10
SPEAKER_00
And it s on TV and commercials there.
10
SPEAKER_00
Like your regular old shampoo commercial might have breasts in them.
10
SPEAKER_00
So people aren t as like, I just think repression leads to the pathology of it.
10
SPEAKER_01
I think that s right.
10
SPEAKER_01
But okay, so these are the top five countries with the highest rates of child sexual abuse.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
10
SPEAKER_01
South Africa, India, Zimbabwe, UK, and United States.
10
SPEAKER_00
Good old US.
10
SPEAKER_00
Well, okay, UK and the US are highly puritanical and repressed and Elizabethan, and India s very,
10
SPEAKER_01
Conservative.
10
SPEAKER_00
Conservative.
10
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I don t know about the African.
10
SPEAKER_00
I can t speak on either of those.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, the bra, the fantasy bra, the Victoria s Secret fantasy bra.
10
SPEAKER_01
You know, that s on the fashion show, the Angels fashion show.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, it was always a big deal.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s a big deal.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
How much does it cost?
10
SPEAKER_01
And it changes every year, so I gotta.
10
SPEAKER_00
It s such a great gimmick.
10
SPEAKER_00
It is.
10
SPEAKER_00
Like, it got people, like, it got press.
10
SPEAKER_00
People were like, this year s dream bra was a fantasy bra.
10
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, so I have a history of the fantasy bra.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, wonderful.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, in 96, Claudia Schiffer wore it.
10
SPEAKER_01
And it was called the Million Dollar Miracle Bra.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was a million dollars.
10
SPEAKER_01
It had 100 carats of diamonds.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, then in 97, Tyra wore it.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was called the Diamond Dream Bra.
10
SPEAKER_01
It had a 42 carat stone at the center.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was three million.
10
SPEAKER_00
Oh, okay, now we re getting it.
10
SPEAKER_01
Then, in 98, Daniela Postova, she wore the Dream Angel Fantasy bra, five million.
10
SPEAKER_00
They have to keep, they painted themselves into a corner.
10
SPEAKER_00
They did.
10
SPEAKER_00
They gotta keep topping themselves.
10
SPEAKER_01
Floral pattern, embellished with diamonds and rubies.
10
SPEAKER_01
Okay, 99, Heidi, Millennium bra, 10 million.
10
SPEAKER_00
Okay, now we re into nine digits or whatever that is.
10
SPEAKER_01
It was encrusted with more than 2,000 diamonds and sapphires.
11
Ooh.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, then we re looking at Giselle.
11
SPEAKER_00
Now we re looking at it.
11
SPEAKER_00
And so was Tom.
11
SPEAKER_02
This is 2000, 15 mil.
11
SPEAKER_00
Ooh, God, now they re really ratcheting it up.
11
SPEAKER_02
It s called Red Hot Fantasy Bra.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s gonna be like 50 million by the time we get them today.
11
SPEAKER_02
I know.
11
SPEAKER_02
It says the Red Hot Fantasy Bra is the most expensive piece of lingerie ever made.
11
SPEAKER_00
At the time?
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, because they brought it back down, okay?
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
11
SPEAKER_02
Because in 2001, because of the recession,
11
SPEAKER_02
Heidi again good for her.
11
SPEAKER_02
She wore the heavenly star bra 12.5 million Okay, so it went down that year went down interesting down Okay, so silly
11
SPEAKER_02
I m gonna move fast, okay.
11
SPEAKER_02
Next, Karolina Kurkova, 10 million.
11
SPEAKER_02
Then, Heidi again, look at her.
11
SPEAKER_02
She s 11 million in 2003.
11
SPEAKER_02
2004, Tyra again, 10.
11
SPEAKER_02
2005, Giselle, 12.5.
11
SPEAKER_02
Ooh, in 2006, big drop.
11
SPEAKER_02
Karolina Kurkova, 6.5.
11
SPEAKER_02
Ew, puke.
11
SPEAKER_02
Embarrassing.
11
SPEAKER_02
Pukes.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, 2007, Salita Ebanks, 4.5.
11
SPEAKER_02
Mmm, that s bad.
11
SPEAKER_02
I think she s a person of color.
11
SPEAKER_02
So I feel like but Tyra had expensive.
11
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah
11
SPEAKER_00
I m definitely calling out Victoria s Secret.
11
SPEAKER_00
Just volleying about the accusation of racism.
11
SPEAKER_02
2008, Adriana Lima, five million.
11
SPEAKER_02
2009, Marissa Miller, three million.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, because of the recession.
11
SPEAKER_00
I ve been seen as inaustere.
11
SPEAKER_02
2010, two million.
11
SPEAKER_00
We re gonna get back down to 25K.
11
SPEAKER_00
It was like a $1,500 broad.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, 2011, 2.5 million, 2012, 2.5 million, 2013, 10 million.
11
SPEAKER_02
Wow, we re back up.
11
SPEAKER_00
They recommitted it.
11
SPEAKER_00
Cause it seems, and I don t know the trajectory of Vicky Siki.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
11
SPEAKER_00
Like, do you think it s paralleling their performance in the marketplace?
11
SPEAKER_02
I m sure.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_02
Well, cause that guy s a billionaire.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
11
SPEAKER_02
The early two thousands were huge for Victoria s Secret.
11
SPEAKER_00
Huge.
11
SPEAKER_02
I spent a lot of money there.
11
SPEAKER_00
Vicky Seegs.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_02
It feels like, is it Vicky Sees?
11
SPEAKER_02
Like I,
11
SPEAKER_00
In chips, we call them Vicky Seeks.
11
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, okay.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, in 2014, there were two models, four million.
11
SPEAKER_00
Combined?
11
SPEAKER_00
Is it two a pop?
11
SPEAKER_02
It doesn t say.
11
SPEAKER_02
All right.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s one million per cup.
11
SPEAKER_02
2015, Lily Aldridge, two million.
11
SPEAKER_02
2016, Jasmine Tookes, three million.
11
SPEAKER_02
2017, two million.
11
SPEAKER_02
2018, one million.
11
SPEAKER_00
And then it ended.
11
SPEAKER_02
And then they brought it back last year, but maybe they didn t do the- They did not go out strong.
11
SPEAKER_00
One million.
11
SPEAKER_00
That was down to the full circle, I guess.
11
SPEAKER_00
Maybe they re like, let s end it where we started it.
11
SPEAKER_02
Definitely by 2018, it s not as popular.
11
SPEAKER_02
I never go there anymore.
11
SPEAKER_00
Do you think you ll be asked to join the?
11
SPEAKER_02
I m too short.
11
SPEAKER_02
My breasts could do it, but my body can t.
11
SPEAKER_00
Your breasts wrote a check your body can t cash.
11
SPEAKER_02
Exactly, exactly.
11
SPEAKER_02
I wonder what it would feel like.
11
SPEAKER_00
Probably uncomfortable.
11
SPEAKER_00
That was so uncomfortable.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, heavy.
11
SPEAKER_00
I mean, $15 million of jewels got away a bit.
11
SPEAKER_02
And it was scratch.
11
SPEAKER_02
Not like Skims, very comfortable.
11
SPEAKER_02
Very, very soft.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, okay, the song.
11
SPEAKER_02
The conversation about worms was so funny.
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, what does she call them?
11
SPEAKER_02
Rain worms.
11
SPEAKER_02
Rain worms.
11
SPEAKER_02
That was so funny.
11
SPEAKER_02
She s so cute and funny.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, now I wanna play something for you.
11
SPEAKER_02
Do peacocks lay eggs?
11
SPEAKER_02
Peacocks are males, so peahens are the women.
11
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I just said sure.
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, ready?
11
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, the fucking... Hey, pause.
11
SPEAKER_00
This is the biggest ding, ding, ding of our career.
11
SPEAKER_02
Why?
11
SPEAKER_00
That is the goddamn song I was singing her, telling her to sing that she made fun of me about.
11
SPEAKER_02
That s why I m playing it.
11
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I thought you were playing me something about rainworms.
11
SPEAKER_00
Why didn t you just go to Spotify to listen to it?
11
SPEAKER_02
And that s the problem with what we re doing right now?
11
SPEAKER_00
Well, I don t know how you got, you needed to hear an Addy or a song, but anyways.
11
SPEAKER_02
I had to Google.
11
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, that was hilarious.
11
SPEAKER_02
Because you didn t say the name of it.
11
SPEAKER_00
That was hilarious.
11
SPEAKER_00
I thought that was like, I thought it was gonna be a clip of her in her Halloween outfit talking about it and that they had put this song to it.
11
SPEAKER_02
No, I was just playing you the song you sang.
11
SPEAKER_02
Oh, fuck.
11
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
11
SPEAKER_00
That was exciting and a miss.
11
SPEAKER_01
I do know this song.
11
SPEAKER_01
This is the beautiful part right here.
11
SPEAKER_02
Won t give me time.
11
SPEAKER_02
That s the song you were singing.
11
SPEAKER_00
How dare her pooh-pooh that song.
11
SPEAKER_00
Although she was really just pooh-poohing my voice.
11
SPEAKER_02
She didn t know what you were singing and neither did I. But now we all know.
11
SPEAKER_02
Now we all know.
11
SPEAKER_02
Let s see.
11
SPEAKER_02
Is there anything else worth saying?
11
SPEAKER_02
How many rollercoaster rides get stuck?
11
SPEAKER_02
Okay, actually, this is worth reading.
11
SPEAKER_02
This is from NPR.
11
SPEAKER_02
Here s what to know about rollercoaster safety after two recent scares.
11
SPEAKER_02
This was in July of last year.
11
SPEAKER_02
In Carowinds Amusement Park in North Carolina, they shut down its marquee rollercoaster because it made a big crack in one of the supports and then
11
SPEAKER_02
After that eight passengers were stuck upside down for hours in Wisconsin Some states to Nevada and Wyoming they don t have any regulations Governing amusement and fixed site parks But I guess it s like growing that more states are adding regulations.
11
SPEAKER_02
So it s kind of like willy-nilly
11
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but I gotta be honest.
11
SPEAKER_00
They re running those rides like a kabillion times a day, three 65.
11
SPEAKER_00
I think the incident rate is insanely low of getting into any trouble on it.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, it is.
11
SPEAKER_02
But you don t want to be upside down for four hours.
11
SPEAKER_00
Like I, certainly not.
11
SPEAKER_00
What s funny is I can imagine a state enacting this department and then like looking on LinkedIn or whatever,
11
SPEAKER_00
Who do they hire and how does anyone know if the thing s gonna shit out?
11
SPEAKER_00
I don t really trust that there s that knowledgeable other than like the handful of manufacturers of the actual rides themselves.
11
SPEAKER_00
It s such a bizarre thing to predict.
11
SPEAKER_02
The standards apply to everything from design and manufacture to installation, testing, commissioning and operation.
11
SPEAKER_02
They look at them every year issuing those operating permits, making sure they can see the documentation of how those rides are being maintained and how they re being inspected.
11
SPEAKER_02
The inspection model is like the commercial aircraft model, which also consists of different types of inspections based on hours of flight and all layered on top of each other to create a rigorous inspection schedule.
11
SPEAKER_02
But then, yeah, it s like state by state.
11
SPEAKER_00
State by state.
11
SPEAKER_00
So it sounds like if you want to open an amusement park, Nevada is a spot for you.
11
SPEAKER_02
No, do it right.
11
SPEAKER_02
Do the right thing.
11
SPEAKER_02
All right.
11
SPEAKER_02
Well, that was it for Heidi.
11
SPEAKER_00
I loved her.
11
SPEAKER_02
She was very fun.
11
SPEAKER_00
Incredibly fun.
11
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, what a hoot.
11
SPEAKER_02
We had a great time.
11
SPEAKER_02
Her and I were kindred spirits.
11
SPEAKER_02
We had a lot in common.
11
SPEAKER_00
Absolutely.
11
SPEAKER_00
Don t let the cover of the book fool you.
11
SPEAKER_00
You guys are twins.
11
SPEAKER_02
Exactly.
11
SPEAKER_00
All right, love you.
11
SPEAKER_02
Love you.