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This is the Art of Charm.
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Learn everything you need to know to crush it in business, love, and life.
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So today s an unusual show.
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On the surface, it might not seem to be the same type of topic we normally talk about.
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It might also be a little macabre, a little bit too heavy hitting.
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We re gonna talk about how to stay safe in the event of, first of all, prevention, but also in the event of
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horrible, horrible mass shooting type of incidents that we ve been seeing around the world and unfortunately we ve been seeing here in America as well with greater and greater frequency.
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I can t help but bring up comparisons to things like the Paris theater incident and the whole Paris escapade as well as San Bernardino.
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It s very, very timely and unfortunately it doesn t look like this is something that s going to wrap itself up anytime soon.
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I wish you didn t need this advice, but I m going to give it to you anyway, or I m gonna have Sean Rafferty give it to you anyway, because I m afraid that if I don t, somebody else who needs it might not get it in time.
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So with that, here s Sean Rafferty, and welcome to The Art of Charm.
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I m Jordan Harbinger.
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The Art of Charm brings together the best thought leaders, teachers, and exceptional individuals to teach you how to be a top performer in life, love, and at work.
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Imagine having a mix of experienced mentors teaching you their expertise and packing decades of research testing and tough lessons into a curriculum We may not have all the answers, but we definitely have all the questions Make sure to stay up to date with the art of charm and get some great stuff that we don t or can t share on the show
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by signing up at theartofcharm.com.
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That s where we ll email you the fundamentals toolkit that covers topics like body language, nonverbal communication, persuasion, business networking, public speaking, negotiation, and a whole lot more.
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I m also doing regular videos with drills and exercises
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to help you move forward every single week.
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We ve also got our live programs running each week here in Los Angeles, California.
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In fact, we ve got guys from all over the world, which shows that no matter where you are, you can make it here if you want to learn and grow.
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We re sold out a couple months in advance, so if you re even thinking about it a little bit, you should get in touch ASAP by phone or just email me, jordanattheartofcharm.com, to get some info from us now so you can plan ahead.
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Looking forward to meeting you here at AOC.
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And now, Sean Rafferty.
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Tell us what you do in one sentence, because this is kind of an unusual show for us.
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Well, basically I teach people how to alter their mindset and behavior by utilizing situational observation awareness to prevent them from being a victim of violence.
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So it s kind of left of bang, but more like civilian left of bang kind of deal?
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Basically, you know, with my experience in the military, law enforcement, private security, you know, I ve taken a lot of that, the things I ve learned over the years and applied it to, you know, what I m doing now, which is don t put yourself in a position to be victimized.
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It s better to avoid it altogether than to have to fight somebody or fight off an attacker.
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So, you know, it applies to civilians as well as military, law enforcement, et cetera.
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How did you even become an expert in this?
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You re a personal protection coach specializing in transforming mindsets instead of teaching self-defense karate moves, basically?
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basically, that s it.
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I mean, that s right on the money.
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You know, the reality of it is this, probably 95% of the people, maybe even more than that, in the United States, they don t have time to practice martial arts or some type of self-defense, you know.
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And the mindset of most people too is just, hey, that s a reactive kind of mindset, meaning I m training to, you know, wait for that attacker to come, boom, and then I, you know, react to it, whatever.
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But the reality of it is that you re at a disadvantage whenever you think like that because that guy that s going to attack you, you don t know what he has planned, if he has a weapon, whatever.
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My background basically – I was in the Marines.
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I was in the infantry.
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I was a corrections officer, police officer.
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his force protection work in Kuwait before the war started, did security contracting in Iraq and Afghanistan.
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I was a federal agent.
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I protected the U.S.
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Secretary of Commerce.
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It was like a mini version of the Secret Service.
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I was a firearms instructor, had a martial arts school.
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So, basically, you know, my whole career path has been based upon, you know, just maneuvering in a way to avoid confrontation.
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what we re talking about here and the reason this is relevant is because right now there s a lot of stuff going down all over the world and a lot of people who are listening everybody listening you know they want to travel even if it s just around the United States and Canada and we ve got a lot of things to think about it s no longer I gotta make sure I keep an eye on the kids while I m having a beer in this park you know it s it s
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It s not even don t talk to strangers.
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It s be careful because somebody might try to shoot you while you re at your holiday party.
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I mean, it s gotten to the point where even though the odds are relatively low of being involved in something like this, we can no longer ignore the problem and pretend like, well, statistically, it s going to be fine.
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That may be true, but we re kind of deluding ourselves in thinking that we re better off.
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What s the common analogy?
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Well, you know, you re more likely to get struck by lightning and win the lottery on the same day.
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And that s true, but you can t prepare for getting struck by lightning slash winning the lottery on the same day.
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But we can prepare.
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for something like a dangerous event.
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And I wanna narrow that down because we re not talking about an earthquake, we re not talking about somebody randomly picking on you in the street and asking you for your wallet.
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We re talking about indiscriminate in the workplace or at a social event.
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Oh, yeah.
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And I mean, especially with this recent attack in San Bernardino, I mean, you re absolutely correct.
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And the great thing about it is it doesn t take a lot of time and energy to be able to, you know, just be more aware.
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You know, I call it well, we call it situational and observational awareness, meaning you re aware of your surroundings.
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You know where you re at at all times.
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You know the layout of the buildings you re in or wherever you re at.
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And observational awareness, meaning you re paying attention to people, their actions.
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Like what I was getting back is so simple.
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It s like if you train martial arts or kickboxing, whatever, it takes years and years and years to develop how to punch and kick correctly, how to block and all this and all that.
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And – but something like just opening your eyes up, get your head out of your phone and paying attention, what that does is it opens your mind, first of all, and it helps you think because if you re ever in a situation where – like we ll just say you re at a party or –
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a movie theater, restaurant, whatever, and some type of incident happens.
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Maybe somebody comes in and starts shooting or whatever.
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If you re not thinking ahead, if you don t have a plan in place, like, hey, if something happens here, I m going to move over here.
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I m going to hide behind this.
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What happens is you re going to have a major delayed effect.
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Most of that s had to do with shock because you re like, oh, I can t believe this is happening.
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You know, the more delay you have, the more dangerous it is to you.
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So you got to be thinking about where to go, what to do.
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It s initially when you re starting to learn how to do this,
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It s kind of like you have to think that way all the time, and eventually, however long it takes you to kind of develop this naturally, you ll just kind of automatically do it after that, after you kind of picked it up and made it a habit.
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So you won t have to like concentrate on it so much.
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You ll just kind of naturally be able to scan a crowd, you know, look into a building and know where you re at.
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Okay, so Jason, you had mentioned this reminds you of a movie.
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It reminds me of the born identity the first movie where he s in the cafe and he s like talking about you know he knows where he s sitting he s sitting with his back to the wall he knows where the exits are he knows what people have what in their cars because he can just tell from his situational awareness and he also is knows like his physical limitations at that altitude i mean it s a classic scene.
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And i think about that when i go to a restaurant now you know it s just like okay can i be jason born and do that stuff.
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Oh, yeah.
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I mean, it s obviously the whole part about the heart rate.
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I mean, that takes a lot of, you know, training to figure that out.
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But simple thing like, you know, we ll use a restaurant analogy like, OK, you walk into a restaurant, you pick a seat where you could see the entrances and exits, you know, so you can kind of pay attention who s coming and going.
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And what I like to tell people is, hey, you know, you get your seat where you could see everything or your menu, and then you get up and you go walk to the bathroom.
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And as you walk through the bathroom, you re scanning the crowd nonchalantly.
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looking for other exits to get out of there, and then you walk back to your seat.
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And then you just kind of sit there and you kind of game plan in your head, hey, if something happens in the front of the building, I m going to go out this in the back or et cetera.
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If I have to throw a chair through the window to get out, I ll do that.
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But another tip is in restaurants, most restaurants, the kitchen has a back exit out to an alleyway or whatever.
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Most people will panic and run for the nearest exit where you could be smart and not follow the crowd.
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I think of Jason Bourne, yeah, I mean, he s, you know, in that kind of situation, he did a lot of training.
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But just simple, just knowing where your exits are at, knowing, you know, where to go.
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I mean, anybody can do that.
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That s the beauty of it.
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Yeah, because it seems to me we can t train people, like you said, to monitor their heart rate, and I m thinking there s a lot of guys and gals listening to this right now that are thinking, I m not gonna live my life in some kind of fear, and it seems like without having and practicing situational observational awareness, you are willingly blind to potential
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threats and any dangers that are around you and now that these dangers are not just the purse snatcher but are more likely to actually do you severe harm and kill you and your family for that matter now like I said earlier we need to focus more on this and we need to keep it simple because there s a lot of people who avoid this subject purposely because it s kind of scary I remember when I was younger I thought oh it s cool I m gonna know all about the security stuff and
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You know, sit facing the door, know where the exits are every time you enter a room, look at people who might be police so that you know where they are and like where anything might happen and look at the people you kind of judge as physical threats and all this stuff.
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But as I got older, I kind of stopped doing that.
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And the reason is because I felt like, oh, it s immature and uncivil in a way to think about things like that.
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you know, you shouldn t have to worry about that, and we don t have to, but now I realize there s so much folly in that.
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It became willful blindness to my surroundings, and I m still a pretty aware guy, which is scary because I look at the way that I go through life, and I realize, oh man, I m 10 times more aware than a lot of those people around me, and I still feel like I m not that observant, and I make a lot of sort of mistakes sometimes where I just go, ah, to hell with it, and I kind of
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whitewash a situation instead of going, maybe I should be keeping an eye on on these people in the corner.
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And then I go now a second guess myself is what I m looking to say.
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And then those are the guys that end up throwing bottles at the tables around them or something like that later on in the evening.
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And I go, I should have seen that coming three hours ago and moved.
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What was I thinking?
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Why did I avoid that on purpose?
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It s it s silly.
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It s something that I ve found myself doing more as I got older.
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And I can t really explain that phenomenon, but I think we need to not just vaguely talk about how everyone can be safer and protect themselves.
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I want to be really specific, because from the stay-at-home mom to the professional police officer listening to this right now, I want people to come away with strategies.
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Yes.
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So, yeah, my side of this is that, you know, as you get older, you kind of don t want to live in a world where there s threats around you all the time.
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You want to believe that the world is a nice, soft place made of nerf and everything is going to be OK.
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And what we re learning now is it s not.
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We are living in the safest time in history, if you look at the statistics.
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But there s also a lot of crazy stuff going on.
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And I think that that s where we really need to start paying attention, because there s more things happening right now than have
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I think in the history of like our lifetime, at least, you know, with just random shootings every single day.
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And that s why I want to hear what Sean has to say about it, because I think what he teaches really can like just help keep us a little bit safer, actually a lot safer by not doing a whole lot of things that are outside of our comfort zone.
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Oh, yes, it is spot on.
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You know, you got to look at it like this.
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In the wild, a predator preys on the weak, right?
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They go for the young or the sick.
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Criminals are the same way.
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They re going to go for the easiest prey they can because they don t want to have to fight somebody to get what they want.
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You know, and this goes for a regular simple criminal.
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It goes for a terrorist who wants to commit a terrorist act.
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They re not going to—a terrorist is not going to attack a police station.
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You know, that doesn t make any sense.
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But they will attack someplace where they know there s a bunch of helpless victims, so to speak.
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So easy way to do it is, look, get your head out of your phone, right?
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So many people now, you know, you re in your car, you re on the train, you re walking down the street, everybody s in their phone.
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They re looking at their Facebook status, whatever.
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They re not looking around.
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Guilty.
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Yeah, I do it too, but you gotta stop that because people are watching you.
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People that wanna inflict harm upon you are watching you because who do you think they re gonna go after?
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Somebody that s looking at their phone, not looking around?
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Or somebody that s standing there, looking behind their back every few seconds, looking around, paying attention?
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Who do you think they re gonna go after?
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And so it s weird, because it s almost like you don t wanna look paranoid, but looking aware is actually a good defense, is what it sounds like you re saying.
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Yeah, it s just being preventative.
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It s like, don t make yourself look weak.
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You know, even if, like, say a woman, right, and the attacker or a potential criminal or whatever is a man, you know, maybe even larger, even somebody that he might consider to be weaker than him as an easy prey, if that woman is paying attention, looking around, being observant, he s going to say, hey, look,
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she might give me a fight or she might run, she might yell, whatever.
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I m just going to avoid her and go down the street to this next person who is so involved in their phone, they don t even know what s going on around them.
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I mean, it s so many easy things people can apply.
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So I suggest this, you know, think of it as like the analogy of soap.
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All right.
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Situational, observational awareness and prevention.
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Right.
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So situational awareness means
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paying attention to your surroundings, knowing where you re at, observational awareness, like I said before, looking at people, observing them, you know, kind of like what you talk about all the time, Jordan, you know, relationships, like you observe the person you re trying to talk to, look at body language, right?
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It s the same thing when you re looking at it like in a protection kind of standpoint, because
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Most people are going to give clues.
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They re going to give clues about what their intentions are, because if somebody is intending to attack somebody, like we re talking about random criminals here on the street, for instance.
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If they re intending to attack somebody on the street or on a train, they re probably going to be acting a little bit differently than, say, somebody who s sitting there.
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How are they going to be acting differently?
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OK, well, they re going to be nervous.
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They re going to be, you know, perspiring.
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They re going to be maybe moving around a little much, looking around.
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Even a professional thief who does this like every day?
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Well, maybe not like a pickpocket, somebody like that.
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But let me backtrack a little bit.
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Somebody who has done it
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Multiple multiple times it does it all the time.
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Yeah, they re gonna be more inclined to mask any kind of nervousness, right?
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I mean you have people that are Serial killers that you know, don t even get their heart rate up, you know what I mean?
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But the average person right there, you know, they re gonna show signs They might look out of place.
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I ll give you an example I went to some training and they were showing us videos of like assassinations, you know and
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By the way, you re super highly trained.
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I mean, you ve been in Iraq.
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You re super dangerous right now.
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I mean, look at Cincinnati, Ohio.
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Oh wait, I probably shouldn t say that, but just kidding.
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Hey, I m from Cincinnati.
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What are you talking about?
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I m just kidding.
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Hey, it could be Cleveland.
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But you ve been in this game since 91, which is forever.
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I was like 11 years old, popping my first zits when you were Marine infantry all the way through to being protective security specialists for
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Various organizations that have had plenty of good press in the last few years I just want to be really clear that when you go through training on assassinations This isn t you watching some YouTube videos about people being killed.
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This is your job You re supposed to be a an expert counter to these people who are being targeted Yeah, I mean it basically the video was you know, this was in a context of being VIP protection, you know having a principal protecting somebody and
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the videos were basically, it showed the assassination and then what it did is afterwards it showed like the camera panning of the crowd before it happened and it always showed like a glimpse of the person committing the assassination, right?
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And generally, nine times out of ten, the person was either dressed like in dark clothes or they had a frown on their face when everybody else was smiling or, you know, they always stood out, right?
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They always stood out from everybody else around them.
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little things like that is, you know, you could pick those things up, you know.
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So, as a civilian, as a regular person, you know, going out through your daily life, you re going grocery shopping or you re going to your favorite restaurant, you know.
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And generally, you know, neighborhood restaurants in certain areas of the country, you know, you see the same crowds a lot of times.
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I mean, unless they re big chain restaurants and who knows.
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But
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Let s just say you go to the same place you go to all the time, like your neighborhood grocery store.
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You kind of get an idea of who s in there, and you re used to seeing the same types of people.
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But, you know, maybe you might pick up and see somebody that doesn t look like somebody you ve seen before, looks out of place, you know, wearing some different clothes, acting a different way.
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That should be warning flags popping off in your head, like, hey, you know, that person looks out of place.
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I got to pay attention to them.
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You know, same thing if you re in a restaurant, you know.
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scan the crowd.
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If everybody s in there eating and having a good time and there s a couple guys in the corner that are sitting there and they re kind of looking at everybody and they re not happy, you know, why is that?
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You know, simple things like that, just paying attention to people and their movements.
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There s an easy way that you can practice your observation skills.
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You know, when I was a police officer,
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Actually, when we had to do the test to become a police officer, they made you do this thing where you look at this picture, right, a photo, and it could be a street scene.
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And they let you look at it for a few minutes.
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And then at the end of it, they ask, like, all these questions.
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And you had to remember what you saw, because usually as a police officer, you have to memorize all the street.
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Right, you got to memorize all that.
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Yeah.
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So that s just a good way of being observant.
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So like in one of my training, that s what I do.
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I show a picture of a street scene, and then I let them look at it for a little bit, and then I ask them questions.
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Well, a good way to develop…
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develop your observational skills is go people watch.
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Meaning, you know, go to the mall, wherever where there s a lot of people, sit back, you know, grab a Starbucks and have a drink of coffee and watch people walk around.
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You know, pay attention to their body movements.
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You know, how do they move?
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Do they move athletic, you know, athletically?
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Do they look powerful?
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Are they handicapped in some type of manner?
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And what I like to do, too, is I like to – especially people I see all the time, I watch their body movements, like how they walk, and then eventually you ll memorize their walking patterns.
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And you can see them 300 yards away and you know that – you can t see their face, but you know by the way they walk.
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You start picking up on things like that.
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No, I was going to say it s funny because I have an unusual gait.
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Basically, I just have really stiff hip flexors.
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You kind of wobble.
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I wobble.
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Let s just say you kind of wobble.
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I kind of wobble a little bit.
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You swagger, man.
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It s funny because I don t like it, but everybody else is like, yeah, it s fine, whatever.
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But my dad does it too.
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It s probably just some sort of genetic thing.
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But people will say, oh, you know what?
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It s funny.
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I was up on the third story, and I saw you walking over here.
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And I m like, how the hell did you see me, you know, half a mile down Hollywood Boulevard?
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It doesn t make any sense.
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they re like, ah, you know, you have that unusual gait.
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And that s when I learned about it.
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This is years ago.
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And my girlfriend even says, oh yeah, you know, I was looking out the window and I noticed you came up the stairs from the grocery store and walking across the street.
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And I thought, you can only see the top of my head and you still know it s me.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s really funny.
2
SPEAKER_02
Likewise, on the same observational tip, I still do this drill a lot whenever I m kind of hanging out.
2
SPEAKER_02
killing time or whatever, and I happen to be somewhere, if I m waiting for somebody, rather than just checking Twitter for the 85th time, I ll look around, and I notice weird stuff, too.
2
SPEAKER_02
I ll be like, hmm, that guy s left-handed, and this person, she s nervous today because she s waiting for someone, and I miss a lot of the obvious stuff.
2
SPEAKER_02
Everyone else notices.
2
SPEAKER_02
If there s 10 people, I ll notice this person s left-handed, this person is wearing a hairpiece, and everyone else is like, there s no women in the room, and I m like, oh, I didn t even notice that.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s really weird.
2
SPEAKER_03
Well, you know, but hey, that s, I mean, to be able to pick out little minute details like that, that s great, you know, because that s going to be, you know, you walk into a room or whatever, you re going to pick out somebody that just doesn t look right, that just is not acting right.
2
SPEAKER_03
Observation awareness, like I was saying before, is so important and it s so easy to develop, you know.
2
SPEAKER_03
Another thing that I always tell people, too, is learn how to lip read.
2
SPEAKER_03
Oh, really?
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I know that kind of sounds a little crazy, but let s just say when I kind of learned that when I was a corrections officer, I could be sitting behind the glass, like in the control booth and looking out.
2
SPEAKER_03
I know the inmates voice, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
I could see him moving his lips, talking to somebody.
2
SPEAKER_03
I can hear his voice in my head.
2
SPEAKER_03
And the reason why I say this is kind of nice little thing to kind of pick up is, you know, let s take it back to the restaurant setting.
2
SPEAKER_03
and you re sitting there eating and you re looking and you see one or two guys sitting in a corner and they re talking to each other and something about them just doesn t sit right with you and you re watching when I m talking and he s like, hey, let s follow this guy out to the car when he s done eating and let s rob him.
2
SPEAKER_02
But nobody really says that.
2
SPEAKER_02
They might say something like, what about this guy?
2
SPEAKER_02
They would never be like, hey, why don t we go accost this person in the parking lot?
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_03
You know what I m saying?
2
SPEAKER_03
Like you can kind of pick up what they re saying, pick up little words here and there.
2
SPEAKER_03
I mean it takes a little bit of time to learn how to do it, but it s a neat little trick that you can pick up.
2
SPEAKER_03
How do you practice that skill?
2
SPEAKER_03
You could just sit from a distance and just like maybe watch like your girlfriend or your friend just sit there and watch them talk, but maybe you can t hear them.
2
SPEAKER_03
And then you start watching their mouth move and then you ll start seeing like how they form words.
2
SPEAKER_03
Like you can actually be a little close to kind of hear them, you know, maybe start off with them being close to you talking and watch their lips and how they form the words.
2
SPEAKER_03
And then, you know, slowly just kind of take your way out of the, um,
2
SPEAKER_03
the sound of their voice, and then that s how you start learning how to do it.
2
SPEAKER_04
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_04
Can we actually do this by watching movies on mute with subtitles on?
2
SPEAKER_04
That s what I thought, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_04
I thought about that.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, sure.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I mean, deaf people do it all the time.
2
SPEAKER_03
They watch your lips and they re able to pick out what you re saying.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, you could do that.
2
SPEAKER_03
Matter of fact, that would probably be the easiest way to do it, especially if you ve watched the movie before and you kind of know what they re saying.
2
SPEAKER_04
Yeah you might be cheating with that but yes definitely but i mean if we keep subtitles on then we can definitely you know just.
2
SPEAKER_04
Watch how the lips move and then read what they re saying is on the subtitle still suck.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah yeah i mean try it out and see how quickly you pick up on it but it s just a little little extra tool in the toolbox you know i mean there s nothing wrong with being able to pull it out and use it when you have to going back to what you d mentioned before.
2
SPEAKER_02
It seems like the easiest target is often the safest option for somebody who s going to be a criminal element.
2
SPEAKER_02
And human predators, though, are no different than animal predators.
2
SPEAKER_02
They choose easy prey.
2
SPEAKER_02
They don t want to get hurt.
2
SPEAKER_02
They don t want to get arrested.
2
SPEAKER_02
But what about in the case that we re dealing with now where they don t care?
2
SPEAKER_02
They re in it to win it or not to win it.
2
SPEAKER_02
And they re in it to just hurt as many people as possible and they don t – whoever – consequences be damned.
2
SPEAKER_02
How do we become more of a hard target?
2
SPEAKER_02
Because that s what we re dealing with these days.
2
SPEAKER_02
This isn t about losing your wallet.
2
SPEAKER_02
It s not about getting your phone snatched when you re walking down the street in London by some teenager.
2
SPEAKER_02
This is about getting, you know, rifled in the middle of your Thanksgiving holiday party.
2
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, and basically it s like this.
2
SPEAKER_03
You got to remember that these guys are predators, and they re attacking the weak because they want to try to do the most damage as possible.
2
SPEAKER_03
So, okay, let me just give some examples.
2
SPEAKER_03
They re gonna go for target areas where there s a lot of people massed, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
Because they have to do as much damage as possible.
2
SPEAKER_03
It wouldn t make any sense for them just, you know, trying to hurt one or two people, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
Because that doesn t make a statement.
2
SPEAKER_03
That s not what they re trying to do.
2
SPEAKER_03
So they re gonna go for mass groups of people.
2
SPEAKER_03
And, you know, if you look at Paris, San Bernardino, any place like where there s any kind of terrorist incidents, there s always, you know, lots of people around.
2
SPEAKER_03
So think of it like this.
2
SPEAKER_03
Wherever you re at, it could be outside.
2
SPEAKER_03
You could be at a barbecue, like you said.
2
SPEAKER_03
It could be, you know, you re at one of those outdoor shopping malls.
2
SPEAKER_03
Anywhere.
2
SPEAKER_03
Concert.
2
SPEAKER_03
A mall.
2
SPEAKER_03
Inside.
2
SPEAKER_03
Anywhere.
2
SPEAKER_03
Know the layout of the place you re going to.
2
SPEAKER_03
Know where the buildings are at.
2
SPEAKER_03
Know the
2
SPEAKER_03
exit points know how to get out of the building if you had to Start thinking about like where you re sitting at so like if you re at the mall, and you re the food court, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
I ll ask you this What do you think s the best place to sit in the middle of the mall in the middle of food court on the outside?
2
SPEAKER_02
Probably on the outside Exactly so because why why is that?
2
SPEAKER_02
Hopefully you re close to some kind of door and also I feel like if anything was gonna go down of this nature it would start in the middle and
2
SPEAKER_02
Exactly.
2
SPEAKER_03
That s because there s probably going to be a lot more people in the center.
2
SPEAKER_03
Right.
2
SPEAKER_03
So if you decide to put yourself on the outside of the crowd.
2
SPEAKER_03
Right.
2
SPEAKER_03
And then maybe sit next to one of those pillars.
2
SPEAKER_03
Right.
2
SPEAKER_03
And then and then no look kind of sit next to close to like an exit point or maybe the bathroom or something like that to where you can get to it if you had to.
2
SPEAKER_03
So you re already medically you re you re
2
SPEAKER_03
You re applying your situational awareness, and then you activate your observational awareness, and you re always thinking about what you re going to do if something happens.
2
SPEAKER_03
But if you re sitting in the middle, you can t do that, and you re going to be stuck, because if something does happen, people are going to be running and knocking you over, and you re not going to be able to get out, and you re going to be stuck.
2
SPEAKER_03
So that s just one easy thing that you could do is don t put yourself in the middle.
2
SPEAKER_03
Get yourself on the outside.
2
SPEAKER_03
This could go for if you re in a nightclub, restaurants, wherever.
2
SPEAKER_03
position yourself to where you can get away quickly and you re not in the center mass of everything.
2
SPEAKER_03
I don t know the layout of what happened to CERN bar is the layout of the building, but it was an office building.
2
SPEAKER_03
So, you know, everybody was in one room and easy target, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
Obviously, let s just be real.
2
SPEAKER_03
If you just happen to be sitting there, back to the wall or whatever, and somebody walked up behind you and did some harm to you, there s not much you could do at that point.
2
SPEAKER_03
But if you are in the vicinity or even in the same room and you already have your escape plan mapped out, like you know what you re gonna hide behind or you know what room to jump into, you know that, hey, this little room over here, I know I can lock the door and I know there s like a shelf in there, I can block the door, you know?
2
SPEAKER_03
I know I can jump in there real quick if I had to.
2
SPEAKER_03
Or I know that, hey, this exit right here leads me down to the first floor, I know how to get out of there, right?
2
SPEAKER_03
And that s really simple for anybody to learn how to do.
2
SPEAKER_03
You just kind of pay attention to where everything s at, wherever you re at.
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SPEAKER_03
So what about the cover and concealment and is there a difference between those two things and and what do we do?
3
SPEAKER_03
I mean obviously the first thing you got to do is get the heck out of there right if something like this happens But you hear about people how this is so morbid even just talking about it, and it s so it s traumatic When I think about the Paris incident for example
3
SPEAKER_03
everybody was huddled down, and I keep thinking, okay, what would I have done in this situation?
3
SPEAKER_03
Would I have tried to run far, or would I have just gotten down, and then what do I do once I find out, oh my gosh, they re executing people?
3
SPEAKER_03
as they take cover as instructed.
3
SPEAKER_03
I guess I just don t know what to do and I would love some 2020 hindsight so that people can prepare in God forbid, worst case scenario of something like this because what happened there was a lot of people ran out and still others cooperated or tried to cover or conceal beneath things and they ended up getting injured or killed that way too.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I mean it goes in the lines of
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, it s so sad that we actually have to think about this.
3
SPEAKER_03
Like, hey, I m at a concert enjoying myself, and I have to worry about... But it s reality, and what I don t want is for anything to happen to anybody who s listening to this, or for anybody for that matter.
3
SPEAKER_03
The reason I did this, I originally was like, nah, I m not sure, this is kind of off topic, but I would feel really bad if I dinged this one, and then somebody had grave consequences because I thought this was off topic.
3
SPEAKER_03
I mean, now that you re mentioning it, it is more about human behavior.
3
SPEAKER_03
It s just that we have tactics that are life-saving instead of just observation.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay, well, so let s do a little quick class on firearms really fast, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
So the bigger the gun is, probably the more powerful it is, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
So if it s a rifle, it s going to probably be more powerful than a handgun, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
So going back to what you said about cover and concealment, cover is basically stuff you can hide behind that ll stop bullets.
3
SPEAKER_02
So the thicker it is, the better, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
Concealment is something that you can hide behind that protects you from the view of whoever s shooting at you, but won t provide any protection.
3
SPEAKER_02
So my thing is this, that another important aspect of just being more aware, and this goes more than just situational observational awareness.
3
SPEAKER_02
is understanding what firearms can do.
3
SPEAKER_02
Because people watch movies and they say, well, you know, I can hide behind this regular door or behind my car and it ll stop bullets.
3
SPEAKER_02
Well, that s not the case.
3
SPEAKER_02
An AK-47, a rifle, will go right through a car.
3
SPEAKER_02
It ll go through regular walls in a house.
3
SPEAKER_02
It ll punch through bricks.
3
SPEAKER_02
So people have to understand that, first of all, because these guys are going to be attacking you with firearms.
3
SPEAKER_02
So the thicker it is, the better.
3
SPEAKER_02
So what you have to do is
3
SPEAKER_02
When you re sitting wherever you re at, wherever you re at, look where the cover s at.
3
SPEAKER_02
Look where the potential cover is.
3
SPEAKER_03
As opposed to concealment.
3
SPEAKER_03
So don t dive behind the tablecloth so that they can t see you.
3
SPEAKER_03
Dive behind some kitchen appliance or something like that, or a potted plant.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, a table.
3
SPEAKER_04
Yeah, the giant brick wall that s, you know, in between you.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, exactly.
3
SPEAKER_04
Because we were joking about that the other night.
3
SPEAKER_04
We had these, like, really giant napkins that felt like they were Kevlar.
3
SPEAKER_04
And we re like, oh, we have concealment now, when it s actually just cover.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, we had this massive napkin.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, the thing weighed more than the plate.
3
SPEAKER_03
So we were joking about those being protective in some way, but yeah, I mean, look at, cause people, I think instinct says dive under the table and it doesn t say dive behind this, one of the, you know, those giant potted plants that they have at like a mall or like a fountain, something extremely large doesn t occur to you.
3
SPEAKER_03
It s almost like adult peekaboo and a macabre sort of way.
3
SPEAKER_03
Like, well, I can t see them, so they probably can t see me.
3
SPEAKER_03
So I m safe when really, if they re indiscriminate, it just doesn t matter.
3
SPEAKER_02
No, you re right.
3
SPEAKER_02
And you might have to use concealment initially, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
Just so you get down a little behind on like a little tablecloth so that maybe they can t see right away.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then, you know, but you already have it in your mind.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like, okay, I just got to like dive over behind this brick wall over here, you know, and get some cover and then try to get to my exit point that s behind me.
3
SPEAKER_02
Right.
3
SPEAKER_02
That s away from the guy.
3
SPEAKER_02
And, you know, the best thing to do is, you know, if shooting starts, you get low, you get behind some cover if you can, or if all you have is concealment, get low.
3
SPEAKER_02
Get behind that.
3
SPEAKER_02
Look for where your nearest cover is.
3
SPEAKER_02
Try to get to it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Try to kind of have an overview of what s going on around you.
3
SPEAKER_02
You can t close your eyes and curl up on a ball and pray that they re not going to shoot you because we all know what happens.
3
SPEAKER_02
So in the context of what we were talking about at a concert hall, well, I mean,
3
SPEAKER_02
If you re in the middle of the crowd, it s going to be very difficult for you to get out of there, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
So because you re going to have people trapped all around you.
3
SPEAKER_02
But what you can do is you get low.
3
SPEAKER_02
Maybe if you have to crawl, you know, use like the seats around you to kind of give you that concealment to where maybe they can t see you.
3
SPEAKER_02
And, you know, you try to move and get out of there if you can.
3
SPEAKER_02
There might be instances where you have to maybe you might have to cover yourself with somebody.
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, there s people that they had to do that, you know, but you just can t.
3
SPEAKER_02
take the chance of just sitting there and, you know, just praying that nothing will happen.
3
SPEAKER_02
You could take that risk.
3
SPEAKER_02
But you also got to understand, too, if you re running away and they re actively shooting, then you could be shot as well.
3
SPEAKER_02
So that s why you got to mean, you know, try to get low, try to go and cover or use concealment to mask your movement.
3
SPEAKER_02
That just goes along with if you do go to a place, pay attention to where you re sitting at, you know.
3
SPEAKER_02
Can you see people coming in and out of there?
3
SPEAKER_02
Are you thinking in your head like something happens?
3
SPEAKER_02
I m going to go do this because it s like this.
3
SPEAKER_02
You ve been punched in the face before, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_03
Fortunately, many times.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_03
So you remember the first time you were punched in the face?
3
SPEAKER_03
I remember many of the times I got punched in the face.
3
SPEAKER_03
And by the way, I m not just getting punched in the face randomly.
3
SPEAKER_03
Every time I go out, I was into MMA for a really long time before anybody called it MMA back in probably the nineties and stuff like that as well.
3
SPEAKER_03
It hurts.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
And you can see stars and your nose is bleeding generally, or you get a black eye or yeah, it sucks.
3
SPEAKER_04
You totally always remember every time you ve been punched in the face.
3
SPEAKER_03
I feel like unless you re in the thick of it, in which case I don t remember those hits, like I ll go, what did I get hit in the face?
3
SPEAKER_03
And my instructor or coach will be like, yeah, like 58 times, man, I m surprised you re still standing, stuff like that.
3
SPEAKER_03
But if you re just sparring and you re not supposed to get hit, for example, and it s an accident, I remember those real clearly because it s so shocking.
3
SPEAKER_04
The funny thing is, I remember getting hit in the face every time I was in class because I took Jeet Kune Do for four years, just like you took MMA.
3
SPEAKER_04
I remember those, but being in actual fights, I never remember getting hit in the face.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, because, you know, the adrenaline s going.
3
SPEAKER_02
But let s just say, put it in this context, you re walking down the street, looking at your phone, not looking around.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then all of a sudden someone smacks you in the side of the head and you ve never been hit before.
3
SPEAKER_02
How long do you think it s going to take your brain to go, oh, I just been hit in the face.
3
SPEAKER_02
OK, what do I got to do next?
3
SPEAKER_04
I don t know, several seconds for sure.
3
SPEAKER_04
Exactly.
3
SPEAKER_04
And then five to ten seconds before you can register.
3
SPEAKER_04
It s like, wait, did somebody just hit me?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_04
Did like a bird fall in my head?
3
SPEAKER_04
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
And in the meantime, you re getting more blows thrown at you and then you re trying to recover.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then by that time, maybe it s too late.
3
SPEAKER_02
Now, put in the context of you re sitting in a room or whatever.
3
SPEAKER_02
And you re not paying attention.
3
SPEAKER_02
You don t know where to go.
3
SPEAKER_02
You don t know where cover s at.
3
SPEAKER_02
You re not even paying attention to all that stuff, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
And then somebody comes in and starts shooting.
3
SPEAKER_02
And maybe you never even heard gunshots before, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
And all of a sudden, oh, my God.
3
SPEAKER_02
Well, was that fireworks, right?
3
SPEAKER_02
Or what is that?
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, there s people getting hurt.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then it s going to take you.
3
SPEAKER_02
Seconds to get the fog out of your head and then you gotta try to do something to survive Well, if you haven t been playing if you didn t have any plan in place like I m gonna hide behind this
4
SPEAKER_00
this wall over here or run down that stairwell to get out of there.
4
SPEAKER_01
How much time do you think you re going to lose, right?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, you can lose a ton and I saw this actually yesterday.
4
SPEAKER_01
I was in the city of San Francisco yesterday and I heard a loud bang and I immediately
4
SPEAKER_01
I jumped back in the building where I was, but I heard somebody screaming, and so I came back out.
4
SPEAKER_01
I heard a lot of traffic honking and glass breaking, so I thought, oh, okay, there s a car accident.
4
SPEAKER_01
So I came back out, and there were a ton of people around, and there was a guy, one guy screaming his face off who wasn t hurt.
4
SPEAKER_01
He was throwing glasses and grabbing mugs from people at a cafe and slamming them into the road.
4
SPEAKER_01
and everyone was just standing there watching him.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I thought, if this guy had a weapon, all of these people would be frozen right now.
4
SPEAKER_00
Exactly, well, I m glad you brought that up, because that situation you just said, what if he started hitting people in the head with the glass mugs?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, or the first bang was actually a firearm.
4
SPEAKER_01
My first gut instinct was, get the hell out, and then I thought, okay, this isn t, it s not a gunshot.
4
SPEAKER_00
Go back and investigate.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I m glad you brought this up about the gunshot sound.
4
SPEAKER_00
Every single shooting just about that happens, everybody always says, I thought it was fireworks, or I thought it was this, I thought it was that.
4
SPEAKER_00
I want all the listeners out there, if you ever hear something that remotely sounds like a firework or something, a loud sound, automatically think it s a gunfire first, okay?
4
SPEAKER_00
Because if you do, then you ll react.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then if it s not, then, okay, you can laugh about it and, you know, you know, have your friends think you re paranoid.
4
SPEAKER_00
If you, you know, automatically think that it s fireworks or, you know, a chair falling down or whatever, then it is a gunfire, then guess what?
4
SPEAKER_00
Once again, you re going to have the delay of reaction, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, seconds or milliseconds count during those situations.
4
SPEAKER_00
The faster you react, the more of a chance you re going to have to survive, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
So,
4
SPEAKER_00
Once again, you think you hear a sound, that s, you know, fireworks automatically thinks it s gunfire until you figure out that it s not.
4
SPEAKER_00
Like in your situation, Jordan, when you were talking about, you walked out and you saw this guy throwing all these glasses around.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, all those people standing around, it just doesn t make sense to me because, you know, who s to prevent that guy from going off on him?
4
SPEAKER_00
It s the same.
4
SPEAKER_00
Same thing with anything else.
4
SPEAKER_00
You ve got to break yourself away from that danger area.
4
SPEAKER_00
And the thing is, people are like sheep, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
A lot of people are sheep, and they just kind of stand around and watch it like, oh, nothing s going to happen.
4
SPEAKER_00
Or maybe they re just in shock, and they don t know what to do.
4
SPEAKER_00
I don t know.
4
SPEAKER_01
So the takeaway here is assume it s the worst thing that it could be.
4
SPEAKER_01
People might have a laugh at your expense afterwards when it turns out it was a car backfiring or somebody sat on a balloon and it popped, but it s better safe that way than
4
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that must have been a balloon or something like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Let me go and look and see what that could have been and now you are in a much worse situation.
4
SPEAKER_01
Same thing with the guy who threw the bottle down, the loud pop.
4
SPEAKER_01
I guess the glass breaking stuff I didn t...
4
SPEAKER_01
it just didn t register, but my first thought was back in the cafe instantly, because Jen s back in there, and I sort of heard everything else afterwards, the little commotion and the screaming, so I thought, okay, this isn t what my sort of programmed reaction was, so I came back out, but he was still definitely dangerous, and I was far away from him.
4
SPEAKER_01
People came out of buildings to look at him.
4
SPEAKER_01
People stopped their cars and their bikes to look at him, and I thought, this is the opposite of what you are supposed to do right now.
4
SPEAKER_01
So if you assume the worst, you can act on that, as long as you re not putting other people in danger.
4
SPEAKER_01
Like every time you hear a pop, you don t just gun it through a busy intersection full of school children.
4
SPEAKER_01
You just protect yourself in as safe a way as possible, and you can always investigate later and find out it s nothing.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, yeah, I mean, as long as you, you know, your eyes open, your ears are open, and you re kind of like, okay, what just happened?
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, and you re thinking, okay,
4
SPEAKER_00
I m going to do this next, I m going to do that next, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
I want to throw this at you, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Let s just say, you know, we re talking about these terrorist incidents, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And they decide to use a diversionary tactic, like having a guy or have some type of loud noise or maybe something go on outside of a restaurant, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And then guess what happens?
4
SPEAKER_00
Everybody walks outside on the street to see what it is.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then guess what happens after that?
4
SPEAKER_00
Right.
4
SPEAKER_00
See what I mean?
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
So you gotta think of that like, you know, the sad reality of it is that what happened the other day, I m willing to bet that that s gonna happen more, okay?
4
SPEAKER_00
And it s gonna happen in places just like it happened in California.
4
SPEAKER_00
It s gonna happen in other places like that.
4
SPEAKER_00
So just, you know, be thinking about that.
4
SPEAKER_01
Further, we have to know our own area.
4
SPEAKER_01
I wanna go over some practicals here.
4
SPEAKER_01
We talked about not keeping your headphones.
4
SPEAKER_01
In fact, that s a tip I got from police.
4
SPEAKER_01
I used to have a girlfriend that lived in a real kind of hood area of Hollywood.
4
SPEAKER_01
And one day, I used to take the bus down there, because I didn t have a car at this point.
4
SPEAKER_01
It was a long time ago.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, I m not gonna get a car in LA, which that lasted a few months only.
4
SPEAKER_01
I used to take the bus down there and go crash at her place.
4
SPEAKER_01
And one day I was walking and the cops were like,
4
SPEAKER_01
You live down here have you seen this guy and I was like no I haven t seen that guy I m just walking my girlfriend s house and they were like hey take your headphones out and keep your chin up while you walk down here because once you pass this car dealership there s not a lot of lighting and they re like how far are you going and I was like up to XYZ Street and they re like yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
between this and this you know just pay attention you ll be fine but don t have your headphones in man look around you know it s not that well lit and I thought that s really true because you could be right behind me with my headphones and I would have no idea you ve got to be looking ahead you ve got to be looking around you know your car where you parked it if you re going back and it s not well lit you definitely need to be paying attention to
4
SPEAKER_01
even things like your footwear, especially for the ladies who are wearing these open-toed heels and things like that.
4
SPEAKER_01
I know a lot of women, believe it or not, that are, I m not gonna have anyone walk me back to my car, I can handle it.
4
SPEAKER_01
And I m like, look, I m sure that s true, however, it s not about you, it s about the perception of you as a victim.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yes, and you make great points.
4
SPEAKER_00
So let s just say, you know, if you wanna listen to music or whatever, podcasts, and you re walking down the street,
4
SPEAKER_00
Have one earbud in, the other one out, you know, and don t turn the volume up loud.
4
SPEAKER_00
And then every, you know, every several steps, you know, maybe just look behind you, okay?
4
SPEAKER_00
That might be just enough to where somebody will not want to mess with you because you re paying attention, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Secondly, like we ll just piggyback what you said about footwear.
4
SPEAKER_00
Have some type of footwear, especially the women, that you can run in.
4
SPEAKER_00
or you can fight in.
4
SPEAKER_00
Don t wear your high heels.
4
SPEAKER_00
Put your high heels in your bag and then wait till you get to work and then throw them on, you know?
4
SPEAKER_00
And another reason why you don t want to wear, like, you know, hard shoes like that is not just because of the running aspect, it s the noise aspect.
4
SPEAKER_00
Have you ever heard high heels at night?
4
SPEAKER_00
Or even, you know, dress shoes, like, with hard soles.
4
SPEAKER_00
Sure, of course.
4
SPEAKER_00
I mean, they re loud, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
So, you know, wear something with rubber soles, something you can run in, something quiet.
4
SPEAKER_00
And that ll just help you out as far as, you know, when you re just walking around.
4
SPEAKER_00
Now, obviously, we can get more into things like patterns, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
So, you re going, driving to and from work.
4
SPEAKER_00
You re taking a bus, taking a train, whatever.
4
SPEAKER_00
You have targets of opportunity.
4
SPEAKER_00
OK, or you have a plan target.
4
SPEAKER_00
So a target of opportunity could be, you know, some criminals hanging out, guy walking alone with earbuds on at night in that section of Hollywood.
4
SPEAKER_01
That s a target of opportunity.
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, yeah.
4
SPEAKER_00
Or some guys, you know, hide behind a bush, behind an ATM.
4
SPEAKER_00
And, you know, there s always going to be somebody grabbing money.
4
SPEAKER_00
Right.
4
SPEAKER_00
So, boom, target of opportunity.
4
SPEAKER_00
Or you have a plan target.
4
SPEAKER_00
So maybe you have more sophisticated criminals.
4
SPEAKER_00
Or in this case, maybe terrorists, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And they re watching a specific target.
4
SPEAKER_00
So maybe they want to rob you, Jordan, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
So they re going to watch you for a week, watch your movements, see what kind of car you drive, where you live, what routes you take every day.
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you take the same way to and from work?
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you go to the grocery store every Wednesday at the same time?
4
SPEAKER_00
Do you park in the same area?
4
SPEAKER_00
They re gonna watch, watch and see what kind of vulnerabilities that would be easy for them to exploit, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And that s like a planned target, a target of opportunities like what we said before, you know, headphones in the air, you know, ATM.
4
SPEAKER_00
So if, for instance, you are at work, you know, if you re a female and, you know, some guy s kind of acting a little weird and he s always trying to talk to you and,
4
SPEAKER_00
You know, you re just being nice, but, you know, he s just kind of weird and wants to be around you more.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, if this guy starts showing up all over the place, just out of nowhere, I mean, red flags, right?
4
SPEAKER_00
And who knows?
4
SPEAKER_00
He might be watching your movements.
4
SPEAKER_00
He might be trying to figure out the best time where he can attack you.
4
SPEAKER_00
And so what I mean by change your movements up, you know, change your, try not to drive the same way to work every day.
4
SPEAKER_00
Maybe mix it up, you know, go one way to work and then take an opposite way coming back.
4
SPEAKER_00
Mix it up, and if you can t, then maybe switch the times up.
4
SPEAKER_00
Leave a little bit later, leave a little bit earlier, mix it up a little bit, because what that ll do is it ll—if somebody is trying to actively target you, then it s going to throw them off a little bit, because if you re just a target of opportunity means they re waiting around just to find a victim.
4
SPEAKER_00
Well, that s one thing, but if they re trying to actively get
5
SPEAKER_01
then they re gonna try to exploit a weak point where you re at.
5
SPEAKER_01
So you gotta mix them up a little bit.
5
SPEAKER_01
Change your route up, change your times up.
5
SPEAKER_00
I wanna throw something in here, something that I actually do, is when I leave the house every day, because I do change up my times when I leave, and we have a big dog here that barks a lot, but still, when I leave, I ll do a lap around the block, and then come back by the house to see if anybody s casing the joint.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because we have we ve had a lot of break-ins in this neighborhood really so what I ll do it Yeah, I mean we ve had the neighbors like three neighbors have had home invasions So what I ll do is like I ll kind of tool around the block and see who s sitting in their car getting high Because it s California and people do that all the time and you can t put everybody in that category of oh, they re casing the joint They re just you know, they re on their lunch break getting stoned
5
SPEAKER_00
But there are people here that will, like, drive away if you see them.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I think those are the people that you need to, like, really keep an eye out for.
5
SPEAKER_00
And I just take pictures of their license plates.
5
SPEAKER_00
So if I do come home and, God forbid, we had a break in, I at least have some place for the police to start.
5
SPEAKER_02
And your neighbors as well.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, it s like you ve got to know your neighborhood, right?
5
SPEAKER_01
You have to know who belongs.
5
SPEAKER_01
What cars are always parked out there?
5
SPEAKER_01
What your neighbors look like?
5
SPEAKER_01
Even pay attention to who comes and visits them.
5
SPEAKER_01
Because let s just say you re driving home from work, and I ll tell you a little story about this guy I worked with when I was an agent.
5
SPEAKER_01
He was driving home from work.
5
SPEAKER_01
It was late, and he lived in downtown D.C.
5
SPEAKER_01
in a kind of apartment building.
5
SPEAKER_01
So he was on the street, he pulled up on the street and he saw this car like on the opposite side of the street and there s two guys in it.
5
SPEAKER_01
And he s like, something s kind of weird about that.
5
SPEAKER_01
But then one of the guys got out and went to the entrance to the apartment building next to where his was.
5
SPEAKER_01
So he s like, OK, well, I guess he s going in there to visit somebody.
5
SPEAKER_01
My buddy gets out of his car, walks up to his entrance to his apartment.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then the next thing you know, he hears, hey, M.F., you know,
5
SPEAKER_01
Give me your money, right?
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, man.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
My friend made a decision in his head.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, I m going to turn around and hit this guy in the face.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, he did that.
5
SPEAKER_01
He turned around and punched the guy and they end up, you know, kind of going off the side of the porch.
5
SPEAKER_01
But my friend got shot in the process.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, my goodness.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, my gosh.
5
SPEAKER_01
Obviously, he didn t die.
5
SPEAKER_01
But the thing was, this gets me into this.
5
SPEAKER_01
Pay attention to that voice in your head like he didn t listen to it.
5
SPEAKER_01
He saw that there was something not right about those two guys sitting over there.
5
SPEAKER_01
Right.
5
SPEAKER_01
And he didn t listen to it.
5
SPEAKER_01
And so he went to his entrance and he wasn t looking behind his back.
5
SPEAKER_01
And that guy was able to come right up on him.
5
SPEAKER_01
And it could have ended a lot worse.
5
SPEAKER_02
Oh, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
So it goes in the context of, you know, know who s in your neighborhood.
5
SPEAKER_01
Know those cars.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, when you re walking your dog, pay attention to inside the cars.
5
SPEAKER_01
There s people sitting in there.
5
SPEAKER_01
There s a car running, you know.
5
SPEAKER_01
If it s nighttime, do you see a dash light in there?
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, you know, pay attention to these things because it could be potential predator or criminal or somebody that s waiting to do something.
5
SPEAKER_01
Those are just easy little things people could do to not put themselves in the position to be victimized.
5
SPEAKER_01
Because when you walk around with your head in the clouds and not paying attention, then guess what?
5
SPEAKER_01
You re going to be victimized.
5
SPEAKER_02
So we need to know our neighborhood and our surroundings, but I think a lot of people overlook, and again, I m totally guilty of this, people post things like, headed on vacation for three weeks, see y all in next 2016, and you re just like, really, dude?
5
SPEAKER_02
Everyone knows you live by yourself, and you ve got a frickin  cat, or like, cat sitter coming to get fluffies, see y all in 2016.
5
SPEAKER_02
Even stuff that you think is not blatant, it s like, everyone knows where you live, I mean, half the people on your Facebook know who you are,
5
SPEAKER_02
It s just straight oversharing.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah, definitely.
5
SPEAKER_01
I mean, you know, people are watching you, especially you, Jordan, because you re a figure, you know, you re a public figure.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, people are watching you.
5
SPEAKER_01
According to Facebook only.
5
SPEAKER_00
But yeah, OK, OK, here s the deal.
5
SPEAKER_00
I have another podcast that we won t talk about right now that we talk about this stuff all the time when people overshare and you give out your geolocation and they know you re not home, period.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s like, OK, come rob me.
5
SPEAKER_00
Oh, like giant sign that says come rob me.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Anytime that you post a photo that is in real time that says, I am not at my home.
5
SPEAKER_00
That is a massive flag for people who want to break into your house.
5
SPEAKER_00
You know, we just had a case here in L.A.
5
SPEAKER_00
It was on the news yesterday.
5
SPEAKER_00
A guy broke into 22 women s homes and robbed them and stole their panties.
5
SPEAKER_00
I was going to say, why only women now?
5
SPEAKER_00
I know why.
5
SPEAKER_00
Exactly.
5
SPEAKER_00
He was a crazy sexual predator.
5
SPEAKER_00
fortunately for them all he did was still like you know their tvs in their panties and this was a father of three you know who had a wife and had a nice life and it s just like oh but they were crimes of opportunity because what he did was followed them on instagram.
5
SPEAKER_00
And they would post photos and they had geolocation on on their photos the back trace that and said okay what now i know where you live.
5
SPEAKER_00
Because you posted a picture from your kitchen like oh here s my cheese sandwich and then he figured out where they lived and when they would go to the gym and he profile them and found out where they were gonna be at what time today and he broke into their homes twenty two.
5
SPEAKER_00
different B&Es that he got busted for.
5
SPEAKER_00
And that s all that we know about.
5
SPEAKER_00
It could have been more.
5
SPEAKER_02
If your underwear is gone, you know that it s gone.
5
SPEAKER_02
Right.
5
SPEAKER_02
But maybe they just thought like, yeah, maybe it s more.
5
SPEAKER_02
But I feel like that s one thing where I would notice the next day, unless he only takes one pair.
5
SPEAKER_02
And you re like, where did that orange pair of panties go?
5
SPEAKER_02
If you clean out my underwear drawer, I will notice pretty quickly, I would hope.
5
SPEAKER_01
especially those favorite worn ones, right?
5
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, we won t even talk about those, but my MeUndies.
5
SPEAKER_02
We gotta throw MeUndies on this one.
5
SPEAKER_02
You escaped Iraq.
5
SPEAKER_02
What does that mean, escaping Iraq?
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, actually, my father and I, we were working on a contract in Iraq, and we basically got another job offer with another contractor, and the one we were working with didn t want to help us out.
5
SPEAKER_01
They didn t want to get us out of the country.
5
SPEAKER_01
They said, you need to give us 30 days notice.
5
SPEAKER_01
So we re like, okay.
5
SPEAKER_01
So basically, we decided to get out of the country by ourselves.
5
SPEAKER_01
So we got a hold of our interpreter, which was a Kurd, by the way.
5
SPEAKER_01
Kurds are awesome.
5
SPEAKER_01
They re suffering from ISIS over there right now.
5
SPEAKER_01
He was a Kurd and we got him to basically take us from the Mosul area of Iraq, which was very bad at the time.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, it s always bad.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then we had him drive us like about an hour and a half south to a base to get some money.
5
SPEAKER_01
And we were going to actually talk to our former boss to kind of have a little chat with him about why he did that to us.
5
SPEAKER_01
But he wasn t there.
5
SPEAKER_01
So we didn t have we weren t able to have some fun with him.
5
SPEAKER_01
So then the interpreter drove my dad and I and actually his cousin was with us.
5
SPEAKER_01
And basically we drove to the border of Turkey.
5
SPEAKER_01
With no communication, no phones, we were just by ourselves.
5
SPEAKER_01
We had an AK and a handgun between us.
5
SPEAKER_01
So we took it to the border of Turkey and we took a cab to the border crossing.
5
SPEAKER_02
At this point, is the cabbie like, sure, bring in your handgun and your AK-47.
5
SPEAKER_02
No big deal.
5
SPEAKER_01
No, what we did was I handed him off to the interpreter, gave it to him, and we ended up coming back about a month later and went to his house and picked it back up.
5
SPEAKER_01
So it was kind of cool.
5
SPEAKER_02
So he s just hanging out like borrowing your AK-47 for a couple weeks?
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
So it s a funny story at the border.
5
SPEAKER_01
we cross over to the border and where it s like a border crossing where a lot of the trucks, it isn t like a normal like civilian kind of crossing.
5
SPEAKER_01
It s like a lot of industry, you know, like a lot of, a lot of semis coming in and out of Iraq through Turkey.
5
SPEAKER_01
So we re sitting there, we had to dump all our bags out on this table and these two Turkish border guards were looking at our stuff and they re picking up our body armor and they re like, what is this for?
5
SPEAKER_01
And we re like, you know, well, we were just in Iraq and then,
5
SPEAKER_01
And then my dad, he s like, Hey, we need to see your ID.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then my dad had like an ID badge, so did I, like a holder, and it had a Kurdish flag on it.
5
SPEAKER_01
Right.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
As everybody knows, the Turks have a problem with the Kurds, and they don t allow like the Kurdish flag or music or anything like that to be played over there.
5
SPEAKER_01
So two border guards look at my dad and go, what is this?
5
SPEAKER_01
And my dad tries to play stupid like, oh, I don t know.
5
SPEAKER_01
And it s a Kurdish flag.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then kind of like stop and they re talking to each other and they re kind of angry.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then they look at my dad and they go, you need to burn that right now or you re going to go back into Iraq.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then the whole time I m sitting over there in the corner, like throwing mine down like where they couldn t see it.
5
SPEAKER_01
So anyway, they,
5
SPEAKER_01
They let us get through, and then the taxi cab driver was this Kurdish guy.
5
SPEAKER_01
And he was nervous the whole time, playing this loud Kurdish music, and then we re driving through the countryside, and every, like, 10 miles, they re stopping at Turkish checkpoints, and then, you know, they have, like, machine guns mounted on the roads, and, you know, I guess they have a problem over there.
5
SPEAKER_01
And, you know, the Kurdish driver, the taxi cab driver was all nervous, and the Turkish military officer would come up to us,
5
SPEAKER_01
look in the window and go, Oh, these are Americans.
5
SPEAKER_01
Okay, let them go.
5
SPEAKER_01
But it was just kind of a funny trip because we went from the border of Iraq up to this place called Van, which is real close to Iran.
5
SPEAKER_01
Driving through the countryside, seeing Roman aqueducts, and it was pretty cool.
5
SPEAKER_01
And then we flew into Istanbul.
5
SPEAKER_01
They took us in the back room and searched us more before we got on
6
SPEAKER_01
on a plane to fly back to the States, but that was my escape out of Iraq with my dad.
6
SPEAKER_01
It was pretty fun, pretty stupid now that I look back at it.
6
SPEAKER_01
They must have been thrilled with you big time.
6
SPEAKER_01
Oh yeah, yeah.
6
SPEAKER_01
Well thank you very much for coming on and sharing your knowledge with us.
6
SPEAKER_01
I hope that people find...
6
SPEAKER_01
Even if this doesn t end up saving their life, which I kind of hope they d never have to put this stuff into play, at least it will make you more observant of people and situations, which is what this show is about.
6
SPEAKER_01
So I appreciate your time and your expertise.
6
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, thank you for having me on, and if anybody needs any help, they can just contact me and I ll be more than willing to help them out.
6
SPEAKER_01
Great, thank you so much.
6
SPEAKER_01
Thanks, Sean, for your time.
6
SPEAKER_01
It s unfortunate that we need this stuff this day and age, but I feel like we are willfully blind to this if we do not learn these types of potentially life-saving techniques and teach them to our friends.
6
SPEAKER_01
Even if it just comes down to the simple, be more alert, don t wear your headphones, keep your head out of your phone, pay attention to your surroundings, and use these tactics to develop better personal observation skills about other people.
6
SPEAKER_01
Even if that s all you take from this, then great, but please, please, be vigilant, keep yourself safe.
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I hear too many tragic stories in my email alone.
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I don t want something to happen to somebody out there because we withheld that, and hence this episode, and I hope that you enjoyed that.
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In fact, if you did, don t forget to thank Sean on Twitter.
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We ll have that linked in the show notes as well as the other resources mentioned on the show.
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You can tap the album art in most mobile podcast players to see the show notes right on the phone.
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I also post tons of stuff on Twitter that never makes it to the show.
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I m at The Art of Charm on Twitter.
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Our bootcamp details, bootcamp.theartofcharm.com.
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Now remember, we re sold out a few months in advance, so if you re thinking about it a little, get in touch ASAP, get some info from us so you can plan ahead.
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Of course, subscribe and review in iTunes.
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We also have our iPhone and Android apps, and when you write a review, it makes us feel proud as well as help keep us up in the ranks so that other people who can use this information can find the show more easily to get the advice that they need.
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It s also the best way to support the show other than purchasing products and training from us.
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Special thanks to the Jasons and to Fogarty for their help in production of the Art of Charm podcast.
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Go ahead and tell your friends.
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The greatest compliment you can give us is a referral to someone else, either in person or shared on the web, and in the case of this episode, it may even save their life.
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Now have a great week, and leave everything and everyone better than you found them.
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Thanks for listening to the Art of Charm.
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Get more confidence, relationship skills, life hacks, and more at theartofcharmpodcast.com.