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In this episode of the Advanced Selling Podcast, we go backwards to a famous Friends episode where Monica sings a song called Delta Don and try to figure out who sings the original.
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After 15 years and 700 episodes of recording the Advanced Selling Podcast, during the episode, ran out of space on our SD card.
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See if you can find where we broke.
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And we go tactical on mindset.
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We give you actions to make your mind right.
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It s a checkup from the neck up, complete with tactical advice.
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Welcome back to the Advanced Selling Podcast, the longest-running sales training podcast in podcast history.
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I m one of your hosts, Bill Kasky.
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I m the other host, Brian Neal.
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Welcome to the show today.
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If you are a new listener, make sure you go to advancedsellingpodcast.com, and there is a list there of the top 10 episodes.
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So if you want to get acclimated, if you don t want to go back and listen to the 1,000-plus shows to bring yourself up to speed, go back.
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There s 10 or 12 on that list that might be helpful.
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And if you are a new listener, you
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Welcome.
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If you re an existing listener, somebody who s been with us for a while, welcome back.
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We typically plan out any kind of funny story that happens to us, because Brian and I both travel, and we re both involved in things that sometimes turn funny.
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Sometimes we make them turn funny.
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Sometimes we think they re funny, and it s not funny to most.
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Not to most.
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But we always talk about music for some reason.
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And so he asked me this question.
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He s singing this song in his head and out loud.
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And so this is a warning.
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This is a Gen X boomer warning.
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This is a really old song.
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You will hate this.
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But and our producer, Rachel, who would be a millennial, I believe, barely, like a Gen Z maybe almost.
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She s really young.
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Knew the song from a Friends episode when Rachel sings this song.
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Did I get that right?
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Or who sang it?
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Monica.
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Monica sang the song, sorry.
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The song is called Delta Dawn.
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Delta Dawn.
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Delta Dawn, what s that flower you have on?
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Can it be?
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So that s it.
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And I asked Bill who sang it, and he s trying to figure that out.
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And I thought, and this person did sing it, but it s not the original person that sang it.
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I said Vicki Lawrence, and I knew when I said it I was wrong, but I was just hoping that she sang it somewhere, covered it, you know.
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The version I know is by,
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She sings, I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar.
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Oh, Helen Reddy.
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Helen Reddy sang that one.
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But the original, I didn t know this, Tanya Tucker.
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Or Tanya, if you re from down there.
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I think it is Tanya.
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Tanya Tucker.
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Yeah, so all the millennial G and Gen Z kids have gone past that.
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Like, these freaking old guys talking about this old music.
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But the Friends episode, maybe you should go look at the Friends episode, where Monica sings Delta Down.
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Because the friends, they just got back together.
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I m trying to bring it back to, and everybody knows that song.
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I don t think everybody knows it, but okay.
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I don t know where that came from.
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By the way, hey, if you re not in any insider group, go get in the insider group, would you?
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We re launching a brand new series that s only going to be available to insiders.
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We might leak a couple out.
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Just a tease, just maybe a couple, but not many more than that.
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We re going to be interviewing really, really well-known sales thought leaders, people that Bill and I follow, and asking them what s the best sales advice they ever got.
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And it s kind of an all-star list cast of characters that you need.
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That s just another reason to be part of the Insider Group.
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So go to advancedsellingpodcast.com.
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We d love to have you there.
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We just added a nice little tranche of new members.
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Glad to onboard them this Friday.
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And actually, that kind of leads us into the topic, doesn t it?
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Yeah, can I go back, though, to the insider thing?
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Oh, sure.
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You know, it s kind of like your parents.
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Your parents say the same thing to you over and over.
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And then somebody from the outside comes, says the exact same thing, but somehow it has more power.
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Completely.
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And that s what we re doing in this episode series, is we re getting some other voices and other perspectives.
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And these are smart people.
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We ve done a couple so far.
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And these are really good interviews.
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I think you re going to enjoy them.
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And you re going to learn something from them, too.
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Always, always, always.
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So we are, for our topic today, we are going to talk about mindset.
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And we are going to talk about mindset, though, in a different way than we ve talked about in the past.
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In the past, you always hear Bill and I talk to you about ways to think and see the world.
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Easy one is the theory of abundance versus scarcity.
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You hear us talk about that.
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You understand it intellectually.
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You might believe it.
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You might not believe it.
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You just are where you are.
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What we don t spend as much time talking about is, how do I get myself
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to that place of seeing the world as an abundant place if I m feeling scarce?
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What s the action that I take?
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What s the tactical way to change my mindset?
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So we re going to hit that today.
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We re just going to do a little short version.
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And then this, I m going to timestamp this.
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So this coming Friday, some people can listen to this.
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when it s too late.
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But the actual insider group that s going to join us on Friday, August the 6th, you re going to get a deep dive of this.
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So if you re catching this episode on the day it s released, it s Monday, August 2nd, 2021, you need to join the insider by Friday because you re going to hear the rest of the list.
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There you go.
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And if you re listening to this in 2027, well, you know.
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That was back post-COVID, remember those days?
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It s interesting to think about, though.
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People listen to our episodes.
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They were recorded in, like, 2014, 2012, you know?
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I wonder if we predicted the future at all.
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It s kind of an interesting thing.
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We probably did.
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I m sure we did.
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We probably predicted this whole pandemic thing coming years ago.
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There are some crazy things.
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Have you seen some of those things?
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Like the Simpsons?
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Simpson s predicted you ve seen that?
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That is scary, isn t it?
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They predicted Trump being president.
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I just heard another one about a pandemic coming in 2020 that was like on some cartoon or something.
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Crazy stuff.
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South Park.
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Just proof that we re in a simulation like Elon Musk says.
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It s kind of fun to think about.
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Scott Adams and Elon Musk both say that.
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They do, I know.
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All right.
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OK, so I agree with you, Brian, that a lot of people do.
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We re not the only ones talking about mindset.
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I think our take on it is a little bit different.
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But a lot of people out there are talking about mindset.
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But I don t hear anybody saying, OK, how do I get to this?
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How do I embrace this correct mindset, whether it s about abundance, intent, your true potential, the buyer-seller?
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There s a lot of different areas that could touch on mindset.
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And so we thought what we d do today is,
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Each of us give you just a little snippet of advice on how we handle it when we are not at the level of thinking that we need to be, which is mindset or mentality.
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Love it.
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And I think that first, what Bill just said is worthy of repeating.
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We teach this stuff for a living, and we are practitioners of what we teach, and we go through the same thing you go through.
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So we have, you got a great business built up, and here we are sitting here.
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We got a great podcast for 15 years.
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And we still have bouts of not seeing the world as abundant.
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I do, I speak for myself.
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You oscillate.
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So everyone s human first to think about that, right?
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Absolutely.
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So we are doing what we re teaching you.
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And it s really great for us to step back and go, yeah, because what Bill said is very true.
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What do we do when we are in this place?
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A lot of times I hear this word mentality or mindset thrown around with thought leaders and trainers and coaches, and yet not a lot behind it.
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Like, OK, what do I do with it?
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And so in this episode, we wanted to share with you how we look at certain things personally, and maybe one or two ideas.
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And then we re going to get into a lot more of these in the Insider Program this Friday, August 6.
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But we wanted to give you a little trailer and some ideas on how you can get your mind more right, if that s the proper way to say it.
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Yes.
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And I think there will be, for lack of a better term, a tactical takeaway from this.
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Yes.
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I don t know.
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The ones I m going to share are very, you can go do them.
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And I do them when I need to.
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Now, I selected two thinking elements, if you will.
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So I got two of these.
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You have two?
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Okay, well, I have two, but mine are more doing elements that help you with the thinking.
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Oh, totally, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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So you wanna go first?
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Yeah, probably my upbringing and my background and scripts that are existing in my head probably lead me down the path of getting attached to things.
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And not necessarily deals, but getting attached to what other people think.
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So when I decide to write something, I sometimes find myself, well, what are they going to think if I say it this way versus what are they going to think if I say it that way?
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And I get away from, well, what do I want to say?
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And then what happens is I spiral out of control.
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I go, I either decide, you know what, screw it, I m not going to do this at all, or I m going to mail it in for the rest of the piece, and I just, I come up with something, and then it s not really me, and it s not really, it just doesn t land.
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Yeah, right.
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And so, but I think, I don t, I can t blame that on writing skills.
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I think that s on my attachment skills.
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I think that, or the attachment,
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Deficit so the idea of me caring about that what other people think gets in my way I think it s more than just I think we think of detachment as detach yourself from the deal Well, there s a whole lot more to detachment than just that which we ve talked about.
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So what do I do?
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One thing that I have found helps me, this is not a universal recommendation, but it helps me, is to go lift weights.
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Because when I m moving, motion versus emotion, if my emotional state s not in the right place, then motion gets me out of that.
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And Tony Robbins talked about that for years.
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Motion leads to emotion.
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If your motion is still and you do nothing, it s going to lead to an emotion of stagnation.
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If you re always on the go, moving, lifting, stretching, yoga-ing, running, whatever the chosen exercise is for you, I think that helps.
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It helps my attachment.
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Because when I feel good about where I am physically, I feel a lot better about where I am mentally.
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That s fantastic.
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And what I love about this more than anything, I m guessing.
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Those of you who are listening to Bill, some of you are probably working out.
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I know a lot of people riding bikes around doing this.
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I bet you didn t see that one coming.
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I bet you didn t see the piece of advice that Bill s going to give you to help your attachment emotional state would be to go do kettlebell swings or do some 20, 30, 40, 80 pound curls in your case.
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But you know.
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Yeah, right.
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No, that s fantastic.
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But what s great about that is that s tactical.
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And it doesn t have to be.
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It s a thing you can do.
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Go do.
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And it doesn t have to be lift weights.
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No.
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Right?
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It can be going elliptical, go on a run.
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But it s the movement part that I just love.
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And so that s what we re trying to give you in today s episode.
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That s really, really great.
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Who is Virgin Airlines?
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Richard Branson.
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Richard Branson, yeah.
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He spends two to two and a half hours in the gym every day, to which you will say, yeah, of course, he s a billionaire.
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He can do that.
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But guess what?
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He s always done that.
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He s always, because his commitment to his body is that if my body is right, my mind s right, my decision making is right, my clarity of thought is right,
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I m running a big company.
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It s the energy that I create in my body through fitness or working out or whatever his regimen is that helps him through the rest of the day.
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He says, my best time management system is working out two hours a day.
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Versus the old way of thinking is, well, I don t have time.
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I m too damn busy.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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And then when you re too damn busy, you re bringing a bad emotional state to the busyness, which doesn t work.
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Exactly.
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Yeah.
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Better to not, yeah.
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Absolutely.
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Better to not work.
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Yeah.
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Yes.
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Well, I chose one thing here, which is the abundant mindset.
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Similarly, my dad died bankrupt.
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He didn t have a penny to his name.
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My mom and my stepdad, who also influenced my scripting on this, worked really hard and did a good job saving, investing money.
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And still, they didn t make a ton of money.
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Made good living, but nothing crazy.
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But there was always, was there enough?
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There s not enough.
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The prices were too high.
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We can t afford that.
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Lots of scarcity scripting in my life.
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And so I know I have these bouts, these little scarcity bouts that will come over me.
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That s really weird.
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They become a false narrative in my mind when they happen.
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I start to think, oh my gosh, all of our clients could leave tomorrow, and we d be screwed.
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And that s the narrative.
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And I think of, I catastrophize that, and then take that out.
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So oh god, then I would go bankrupt, and then I m a bad human being, all this stuff.
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The movie has a bad ending.
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It does.
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It has a bad ending.
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And what s funny is it s all false.
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And it s still a movie.
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It s still a movie.
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It is not real.
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And so there are two mechanical things that I do with this.
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Number one is I go look at my investment accounts.
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And I remind myself that I could not work for several, several years, including I ve got kids still in college, and I m paying.
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There s a lot of outflow.
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And I could go for several, several years without any income.
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I feel really good about that, proud of that.
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Still, I m more wired to the other way.
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That, oh, I m supposed to be bankrupt because my dad was.
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That sort of thing.
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See what I mean?
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that, like you said, the movie has a bad ending.
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So that s one thing I do is I ll go look at that and go, OK.
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Now, I m not looking at the up and down.
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I m just looking like, OK, I ve got this much.
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And in a catastrophized sense, if we had to sell everything, we can go a really long time without bringing in any money.
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That s one thing I do.
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The other thing I do has to do with our hometown of Indianapolis, Indiana.
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And some of my clients, if you re a listener, you ve heard me give this advice.
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We have a loop around our city called Interstate 465.
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It goes all the way around.
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I think it s 47 or 51 miles.
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And when I m feeling scarce, I like to get away to clear my head.
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But what I do, I do one full lap around 465, and I just look out the windows.
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And I think, oh, look at all these companies.
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All these businesses have salespeople.
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It is mind-blowing how many businesses there are in our little town, the whatever, 12th biggest city in the country or whatever.
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500 feet from the interstate.
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500 feet from one interstate that takes me, and I just do one lap around there.
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I don t go in the city, not downtown, and I just look out the window.
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You could even look out one side.
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You could just look at the inside of the loop, and you just see business after business after business after business.
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And everyone relies on selling.
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Everyone has some sales or BD, and that s just Indianapolis.
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That always snaps me out of it, because that s just our little hometown.
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You know what I mean?
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And then we can go out.
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And then we go to St.
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Louis and Cincinnati and Chicago and Detroit.
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And then we can go to LA and New York.
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And then we can go to Tokyo.
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You can spend all those three years just driving around the country.
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Seriously.
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Where s Brian?
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He s doing a lap.
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Okie dokie.
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This time it s around the country.
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Yeah.
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Flying A1A.
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Yeah.
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So that s a very good mechanical thing for me to bust out and get out of the walls here and say, look at all of these businesses and these people in this company.
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It s almost overwhelming.
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Can I ask you a question going back to your first comment there about the money and all that?
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You mentioned something about I have enough.
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And I think that word enough is something that we need to,
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be a little bit more mindful of.
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And sometimes I think we all say, well, we have this, but we want to get to the next level because this is not enough.
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And yet there are, I mean, the question I always have is, well, what is enough?
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And is it a moving scale?
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It probably is.
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And what does it really even mean?
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Enough to what?
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Enough to be happy?
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Well, we know that
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At some level, money keeps you from being happy.
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And then at some other level, it s optimum.
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And then from there, it doesn t really help you anymore.
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So if you have a million dollars in the bank and you re happy, $100 million is probably not going to make you happier.
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It might make you feel a little bit more secure, but then the question is, well,
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You know, what s my money doing?
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Is it working for me?
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Is it working against me?
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Who s going to take it?
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I don t know if I trust that financial planner because he s taking it.
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And so the question I have is, what is enough?
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Have you thought about that in the context of money and financial assets?
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Yes.
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Me personally?
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Yes.
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Yes.
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Have I thought about it?
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Yes.
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Where do you land on?
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I don t mean like a dollar figure.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, no, no.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, so we went to a strategic coach, our own coaching program up in Chicago, a guy, Dan Sullivan, who we ve talked about here.
1
SPEAKER_00
And he s really helpful with this.
1
SPEAKER_00
He actually has you roll out a 25-year vision plan.
1
SPEAKER_00
And so we have some date mile markers where, essentially, we get to a point financially where we ve got all these things we want to do, and we are capable of doing them without changing or modifying our financial condition at all.
1
SPEAKER_00
That, to me, is the point.
1
SPEAKER_00
We re not quite there yet.
1
SPEAKER_00
And that s a combination of a number and also things we want to do, and all subject to change.
1
SPEAKER_00
But it s all written down.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then we re just on the plan and working.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then you pull all the way back to the quarter you re working on.
1
SPEAKER_01
So then, though,
1
SPEAKER_01
There s no focus necessarily on, I will be happy when I get to this number.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, I m happy now.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s really more about what s possible.
1
SPEAKER_01
Absolutely.
1
SPEAKER_01
What s really possible?
1
SPEAKER_01
Forget about the money aspect.
1
SPEAKER_01
What s just what s possible?
1
SPEAKER_01
How can I have the biggest impact?
1
SPEAKER_01
Things like that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
1
SPEAKER_01
critical because I think managers, sales leaders don t spend nearly enough time on the what s possible for people.
1
SPEAKER_01
I think we spend way too much time on, well, how much do you want to make this year?
1
SPEAKER_01
How much do you want to make next year?
1
SPEAKER_01
What do you have to do to make that?
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, you got to grind out a thousand more cold calls a year.
1
SPEAKER_01
And it s like, well, that s, is that really what it s about?
1
SPEAKER_01
We just had an interview with somebody who s on our insider thought leader series.
1
SPEAKER_01
And he said the same thing.
1
SPEAKER_01
He says, we just don t spend enough time focused on how we re transforming our client.
1
SPEAKER_01
The more focused we are on that, the more money shows up in your account.
1
SPEAKER_00
No doubt.
1
SPEAKER_00
No doubt.
1
SPEAKER_00
And you know, on both sides of it, and I ve been bankrupt before, you know, on both sides of it, you re, you know, you re, I mean, it s a little stressful when I was bankrupt, but you know, I ve been, I got stressed now too, and I m not close to bankrupt and it s like,
1
SPEAKER_00
You know?
1
SPEAKER_00
It s just, to your point, there s no real big difference.
1
SPEAKER_00
The delta between happy and unhappy is not as big as we think it is.
1
SPEAKER_00
No.
1
SPEAKER_00
It just isn t.
1
SPEAKER_00
And people think it is, and it s not.
1
SPEAKER_00
So be happy.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s not.
1
SPEAKER_00
Just be happy.
1
SPEAKER_01
Be you.
1
SPEAKER_00
Don t worry.
1
SPEAKER_01
Be happy.
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
Good job today.
1
SPEAKER_01
So on August the 6th, which is Friday, if you re listening to this the week of the 2nd, this Friday we have our Insider Program.
1
SPEAKER_01
You can go to advancedsellingpodcast.com and find out more.
1
SPEAKER_01
We re going to be dissecting this whole mindset and mentality area even deeper than we did today.
2
SPEAKER_00
to give you some sense of what we ll be doing on Friday.
2
SPEAKER_00
So make sure you re a member of the Insider Group.
2
SPEAKER_00
We d love to have you.
2
SPEAKER_00
I think you ll enjoy it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, please join us there.
2
SPEAKER_00
We d love to have you there.
2
SPEAKER_00
Bye.