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Welcome to the art of charm.
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I m your host Jordan Harbinger.
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I m here with producer Jason DeFillippo here at the art of charm We may not have all the answers, but we certainly have some of the questions of course today on fan mail Friday those questions come from you That s the whole idea here if you re new to the art of charm podcast fan mail Friday at
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I would say you can listen, but it s not my favorite place for you to start.
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Most of our content is more in-depth, longer format.
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There s interviews with people you ve heard of.
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There s also some toolbox episodes where we teach a lot of fundamentals, body language, charismatic nonverbal communication, the science of attraction.
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negotiation techniques, networking, influence, persuasion, everything else we teach here at The Art of Charm.
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I ll send that to your inbox if you text the word charmed, C-H-A-R-M-E-D, to 33444, that s here in the states, or anywhere else, just go to theartofcharm.com.
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You can also find the toolbox on the web at theartofcharm.com slash toolbox, and the best of at theartofcharm.com slash best.
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All right, let s cut to it.
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Hey Jordan, you re good at reading people, not only in person, but by what they write.
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How can you tell in letters when someone has low social intelligence or EQ and read between the lines as to what they might be doing in a given situation?
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Rock on, Alex.
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All right, I will rock on.
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But this is a great meta question, and here s some of the ways that we read between the lines.
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I really do like this question, very thoughtful.
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A lot of people who don t know what they re looking for, or don t know how to solve a problem, they make bad conclusions.
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So they say things like, well, you know, she did this thing, so it probably means that.
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Or she s probably doing this, it probably means that when this happens.
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Or even something really overly simple.
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For example, guys especially, who say things like,
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Well, I don t need this episode or that episode or the boot camp because I m already really good at talking to people.
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My experience is that whenever someone thinks they re already good at something that has continually expanding returns like soft skills, they actually have an EQ or social intelligence oftentimes so low that they don t understand the value of continued education.
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In other words, it s kind of like saying, well, I don t need to go to the gym because I m already in shape.
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or I don t need a trainer because I ve been lifting weights once a week since high school and there s nothing for me to learn.
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This type of fixed mindset, and by the way when I say fixed mindset I m talking about Carol Dweck, her book Mindset.
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We had her on the show as well earlier.
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That type of fixed mindset is usually the beginning indication that there are some problems elsewhere that stem from other fixed mindsets.
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So I start to look for those in the letters that come in and where there s smoke,
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there s often fire.
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And also, I ve been reading emails about this stuff, me and Jason both have, and being asked for advice for well over a decade here.
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And this all started happening even before we started the show, and we just had our 10 year anniversary.
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So people have been asking me for advice via email, and in person for that matter, for a long time.
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And it s always about reading between the lines.
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Because if people could articulate their problem really, really, really well, often they have
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at least an indication of the solution, but here s the problem.
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Even people who think they can articulate their problems really, really, really well are often articulating something that is not the actual root cause of the issue.
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So I have to look for those, and the only way to do that is to read between the lines in the way that I just outlined above.
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And I think what people don t really understand is they are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
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Right.
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Well, yeah.
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These things these things do have patterns to them.
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And after you read these for 10 years, like you ve been doing, you can see those patterns emerge in what they re talking about.
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Exactly, yeah.
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It tends to be something where, you ve probably never seen this before, or maybe you ve seen this before, you know, for those of you who realize that there are a lot of commonalities here.
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And then it s like this situation where they describe basically the same set of facts that has been in the last 25 letters that we ve read, with different names, different locations, different people, different amounts of time involved, and possibly some minute details that are usually inconsequential.
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But are a big deal to the person in the problem in the moment, and it s not this is I want to be clear here I m not saying everybody who writes in is such a knucklehead.
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They don t even know what their problem is It s almost impossible to read the label when you re inside the jar You don t know what the problem is when you re dealing with it You don t know why she broke up with you for real because she s giving you these reasons, and you re hurting right now You don t know why he left you or why you didn t get along with your dad when you were a teenage gal or when this certain thing happened you don t really get it in many ways because why would you?
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It s never happened to you before.
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You ve spent a lot of time thinking about it, but you can t separate the emotion from it.
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And so it makes perfect sense.
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I mean, this is what therapists do all the time.
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All right, next up.
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Hi AOC.
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I can t manage to get myself out and go meet people and network.
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I m just a homebody.
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Thanks, couch potato.
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Yeah, so I get this letter all the time, and this is sort of the digested, distilled version.
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There s always a huge paragraph about why they can t go out and meet people, or why they don t want to, or why they don t have time.
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And this is the way that I help solve that for AOC clients.
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I m just gonna share this, it s a really easy one.
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Tell yourself you re gonna go out and have two or three conversations at whatever event you re thinking of going to, and no more.
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This is the running shoes on the porch equivalent of going to be social.
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And by that I mean a lot of folks who can t motivate to go to the gym or go for runs, what we usually tell them is, look, get up in the morning, put your running shoes on,
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and then go out and stand on your front porch.
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And if you want to turn around and go back to bed, and you don t want to go to the gym or go for the run, you re allowed to.
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But basically, this is the social version of that.
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By the time those first two or three conversations are over, no matter how tough they might have been, you re loosened up.
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Or you go home, which is okay too, because you re still making a little bit of progress there.
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And if you keep doing it, it just gets a lot easier.
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And of course people are going, but now I can t motivate myself to go out and have two conversations.
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Fine, go out and have one.
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Or go to the grocery store and talk to the cashier and then go to the event and have another conversation.
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You know, warm yourself up in a way that you need to.
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And I m telling you, if you can motivate yourself to go there and do one conversation or two conversations, you re going to start to shake the rust off.
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For a lot of people, though, I think they have no problem going to the event and they even think, look, I m not shy.
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So they ll go to the event and then they start getting stuck while they re there, they start feeling awkward while you re there, and that s a different skill set that we work on actually a lot in the Art of Charm Challenge, which we ll talk about at the end of this, but the short version is go to theartofcharm.com slash challenge.
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We ll take you through step by step on how to do this.
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You can also text the word charmed, C-H-A-R-M-E-D, to 33444.
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Product placement.
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All right.
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Product placement.
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Hashtag hashtag product placement.
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All right.
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Next up, Jason Jasper writes in.
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I ve been doing the doorway drill, by the way, which is super fun.
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I do it all the time.
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Very helpful, but I still catch myself forgetting to do it fairly often.
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Any tips?
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Sure, so I want to talk about the doorway drill real quick.
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I ve mentioned this in a bajillion different shows, and again, of course, it s in the challenge, but basically it s every time you walk through a doorway in your own house, you stand up straight, shoulders back, chin up, chest out.
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It fixes your body language and shows you how to have open, positive body language and develop the habit of doing that by using doorways as a reminder.
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The problem is Jasper s going, but I m forgetting to do it even in the doorways.
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And so many people had problems with this, myself included, that I actually invented the post-it note trick, which is an addendum to the doorway drill.
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And what that is, is you stick a brightly colored post-it, as if there are any other kind of post-it.
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You stick it on the doorframe at eye level, maybe even two, depending on where you re looking inside the doorframe.
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You ll see that, and you ll go, what the hell is that doing there?
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Oh yeah, doorway drill.
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It ll break your autopilot mode.
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Because every time you walk through a doorway, you ve been doing that your whole life.
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There s nothing new about it.
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There s nothing interesting.
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You have to have something inside your house or your office and or, you know, both.
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That s gonna break that autopilot.
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That s gonna be a pattern interrupt if you re into the whole NLP thing or the hypnosis stuff.
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You ve got to interrupt that pattern.
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And the way that you do that is you don t even have to write anything on the post-it.
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Just stick the post-it up there.
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You can reuse it for something later if you re weird like me and you don t want to waste blank post-it notes.
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Cheap, cheap, cheap.
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It s not even that.
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I just have this thing, right?
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It s like, oh, it s such a waste.
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I put an up arrow on mine.
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Oh, you do?
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So every time I come in the studio now, I have an up arrow.
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And it s just like, oh, OK.
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It s brilliant.
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Because if I m going to be on the air, I want to be sitting up straight.
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I want to have my good proper posture for
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Vocal tonality that s right, and if you re thinking oh my gosh now I m used to these post-its you can rotate the color But I ll tell you I ve never had a student or client or even myself And I m a slow learner that needs to rotate the colors of the post-its because frankly you ll start to build that habit You re gonna see those post-its by the time you get used to them in other words by the time you get in the habit of seeing them You ll be in the habit of straightening up anyway, so you ll be fine that should help next question I
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My friend stopped listening to AOC because he thinks he s got a quote-unquote handle on this stuff.
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What s going on here?
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Yours truly, Frustrated Friend.
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I got a bunch of these this week.
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It goes hand-in-hand with question number one, actually, where a lot of folks are kind of going, well, you know, I m trying to get people interested in this.
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I m trying to get my son to listen.
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I m trying to get my husband to listen.
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I m trying to get my team to listen.
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And even their brothers and sisters or themselves sometimes are falling off the wagon.
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So I included this because
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Frustrated friend brings up a really interesting point which is that the people that need these types of soft skills the most are Actually the least likely to realize that they need it.
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So there s a huge disconnect between social intelligence and
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and perception of their own, so how others perceive them, et cetera.
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Earlier in the show I mentioned it s like saying you went to the gym so much you got in shape and now you re taking a break because you re too fit.
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This is just lazy thinking.
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It s actually a losing mindset.
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There s not much you can do about it if you re talking about other people, trying to get them to develop habits.
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If you care enough about those people to work at it,
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Tell them about the shows and tell them about some of the benefits of the shows.
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Tell them they re really funny or something like that, which, you know, is kind of a lie, but hey, whatever.
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Tell them about the benefits, tell them about the specifics, takeaways that you re getting from some of the interviewees, that you re getting from Fan Mail Friday, and especially from Minnesota Monday.
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Some people will eventually see the disconnect between their performance in reality and the expectations in their mind.
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And I just got a letter, Jason, along these same lines from a lawyer in New York who was, I mean, he was writing me all the time, maybe a year ago, and just loved the show, loved the show, loved the show, and I got a letter from him this past week that said, hey, I fell off the wagon, I m starting to listen again.
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me being me, I said, well, why did you fall off the wagon?
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Was it something, you know, was it something we said?
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He said, no, I just got really lazy.
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I thought I knew enough about this stuff.
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And then he lists all these kind of, you know, suboptimal outcomes that would not have happened if he was kind of on his game.
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I realized, look, a lot of people think, oh, the art of trauma is for people with social problems or something like that.
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Not true at all.
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The people who are listening to the show and applying these things are high performers that want to continue to grow.
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This is the 90th percentile trying to go to the 95th or the 95th trying to go to the 99th percentile.
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This is not people who tie their shoelaces together, have tape on their glasses and things like that.
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I have tape on my glasses.
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Watch what you say there, brother.
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You just work here, right?
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We re talking about the AOC family here, the fan base.
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But really, I m looking in some of the letters that I got recently, and there are people that are pro athletes that are on NHL hockey teams, there s NFL players that have won
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certain types of high-prestige awards.
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We have Olympians on here.
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This is not people who can t figure out how to get it together.
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This is for people, well, there s some of that, of course.
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This is for people that want to maximize what they get out of life, and especially when it comes to soft skills.
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So your friend, frustrated friend, might have some lazy thinking going on.
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There s not a whole lot you can do to change people s thinking manually.
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All you can do is show benefits and make them feel
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like maybe they re missing something.
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And the way to do that is by applying this stuff for yourself and showing them firsthand what they could be doing.
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And some people are gonna really dig that.
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And other people are gonna blame you for highlighting their shortcoming.
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And that s where we get into screening the right type of people in and frankly out of your life.
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And that s another question for another show.
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Another thing I d like to point out is that as we do this show every week, we grow.
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And we are learning and meeting new people and coming up with cool new stuff every week.
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So it s not the same show.
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It s not like we have a textbook that we re talking about every week in and out.
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You know, Jordan has grown so much since I ve met him.
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Was it four and a half years ago at this point?
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Yeah, and I used to listen to the show and the show is completely different now because Jordan has grown as a host because we meet new people every week And I think that really is something that we try and pass along in the show that hey Just you know, the thing we taught last week is fantastic.
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Here s the next level.
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Here s the next level and the next level So just saying that you have a handle on this stuff.
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No, we don t have a handle on this stuff Yeah, we re learning every week
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It reminds me of, what is that guy s name?
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Is it R. Paul Wilson or something like that from The Real Hustle?
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I m probably getting the letter wrong.
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He used to say, he used to do that show about con men, and he used to show how the cons work and everything like that, and he said, if you re the type of person who thinks they can t be conned, you re exactly the type of person that I want to meet.
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Yep, I remember that show, that was a great show.
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And I think that that s very apropos this because it just goes hand in hand.
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When we talk with hiring managers of a lot of Silicon Valley companies and large corporations, we re always giving speeches in these corporations, teaching classes to people that work there, or they re coming through the AOC bootcamp, one of the things they mention is, man, I wish everybody knew this stuff.
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And meanwhile, they ll send their team through after they come through, and there s always two or three guys on the team that are like, yeah, I don t really think I need this.
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And universally,
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Nearly universally, those are the lowest performers on the team.
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And that s not a coincidence.
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It s not even just because they re arrogant or cocky.
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A lot of these people are perfectly nice.
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It s the disconnect in social awareness that comes from not knowing what you don t know.
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It s unconscious incompetence.
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Ooh, I like that, unconscious incompetence.
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Well, I didn t make it up.
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It s that unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, and unconscious competence.
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Of course, it s called the four stages of competence.
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So basically, this has to do with, or the conscious competence learning model is what I think it s referred to a lot.
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Essentially, you start off not knowing what you don t know.
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Then you find out what you don t know and you can actively start to work on it.
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And then you go to, I do know how to do this, but I have to think about it each time I do it.
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It s a manual process.
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And then you get to where you can do it essentially without thinking.
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Those are the four stages of competence.
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And so where a lot of people are caught is unconscious incompetence.
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And essentially what that means is that you have no idea that you are not good at or performing at a certain level or don t know something.
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And then a lot of people also get stuck in conscious incompetence where they go, I don t really know this stuff, but I don t really need to.
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And the reason for that is, and then insert some sort of emotional justification why people really don t want to do the work.
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And those two types of people don t fare well with AOC when they run into this stuff.
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They kind of go la la la la la with their hands on their ears and they run away.
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Or they just go, what kind of dorks do that?
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And then their friends who are trying to get them desperately to apply some of this stuff go, oh, damn it, we missed him again.
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You know, they re trying to catch the butterfly in the net and it s not working.
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Jordan, you don t do the fake hype man thing like a lot of shows do.
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The, I m super excited today because I have an absolute legend on the show, et cetera, et cetera.
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Signed, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday.
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I m sure that s what that came in as, Jason.
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I ll tell you though, I m on the fence sometimes when it comes to how I run these things, I ll be honest.
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I mean, I ve got a lot of different moods going every single time we record and I know a lot of folks like to add extra energy in there to be more inspiring.
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En fuego!
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That s right, yeah, I mean, but I think it s a bit of a cheap ploy for your attention, frankly, and I feel like I respect the OC family a little more than that.
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I just, I don t need to do that, and maybe I m wrong here.
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I could be wrong.
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Maybe I need to do that, but I really, really don t want to.
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First of all, it s not me at all.
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I m kind of naturally just like this, and people who ve met me in real life always say the same thing, and I m very proud of this, actually, Jason, that they go, wow, you re just like you are on the show in real life.
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Unless they meet me when I m tired and they go, are you sure you wrote the show for a living?
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Today, you re a dick.
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Well, it s not even just that.
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It s just that you ve said three words.
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Are you sure you re a talk show host?
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But I just have more respect for the AOC family.
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I just think, look, there s a bunch of smart people listening to this.
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There s a bunch of high performers and intelligent folks listening to this show.
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They don t need me to keep their attention with explosions.
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They just don t.
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And it s funny, I ve known you for four and a half years, five years now, almost, and it s totally true.
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You are the same guy on the show as you are sitting there playing video games with me in your living room, you know, in our MeUndies slash AOC.
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With clothes on over them, because otherwise it s just a weird visual.
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Yeah, no, you re the same guy, so I totally get that.
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But yeah, the Sunday, Sunday, Sunday guy!
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It was just, you know, I don t go for that.
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I just like to do it when I get the chance.
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Yeah, it s so not me.
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And in the end of the day, if that s really what people need to pay attention, I think this is probably the wrong show for them.
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All right, last one.
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Hey, big fan of your show.
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I share often and learn quite a bit.
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Regarding your question about how to address women and why girls is offensive, a good rule of thumb is if a female can reproduce, she is no longer a girl.
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She s a woman.
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Addressing her as such is diminutive.
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It s like saying son to someone who s not your son.
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Whoops.
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Yep.
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Have you ever had that happen?
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Yeah, but I don t get offended by it, but I m also not a woman or a girl, and maybe there s, I feel like there s differences there, because usually when somebody says, excuse me, son, it s like, oh, okay, it s sort of a term of, it s warm, right?
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But I think if people say girls, sometimes, I mean, not when I say it, but sometimes it can be taken like, oh, okay, I get it.
1
SPEAKER_00
were not, you know, qualified to be in the room.
1
SPEAKER_00
I could see that.
1
SPEAKER_01
Okay, because when somebody calls me son, I want to smack them.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, really?
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_01
No, I find it a violent, offensive term.
1
SPEAKER_01
Well, that just backs up Ella s point here.
1
SPEAKER_01
Continue.
1
SPEAKER_01
All right.
1
SPEAKER_01
On some level, it harks back to the societal obsession with youth and dating younger women for trophy purposes, where calling men boys is playful and a nod to their virility.
1
SPEAKER_01
There you go.
1
SPEAKER_01
Sure, we may call each other girl as in girl or hey girl, but that s more to each other
2
SPEAKER_01
in a we are sisters kind of way.
2
SPEAKER_01
You may equate it to use the N-word within black communities.
2
SPEAKER_01
I hope everyone turned their speakers down before you screeched in that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Girl!
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that, exactly.
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SPEAKER_00
Blew out of eardrums.
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SPEAKER_01
Think of it one other way.
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SPEAKER_01
As men are generally, naturally, physically stronger, who is it easier to muscle?
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SPEAKER_01
A woman or a girl?
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SPEAKER_01
A lady or a girl?
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SPEAKER_01
A gal or a girl?
2
SPEAKER_01
And to use your word, a goddess or a girl?
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I switched up to goddesses just immediately.
2
SPEAKER_01
Nobody can complain about that one.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, you know, I m thinking a Wonder Woman.
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SPEAKER_01
She s a goddess, so I m not going to muscle her.
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SPEAKER_01
That s for damn sure.
2
SPEAKER_00
You can t.
2
SPEAKER_00
You got the invisible lasso or the maybe it is the lasso invisible.
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SPEAKER_01
The ships and the jets invisible.
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SPEAKER_01
The lasso is the lasso of truth.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, got it.
2
SPEAKER_01
OK.
2
SPEAKER_01
You will, of course, find women that are OK with it.
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SPEAKER_01
But language is powerful and especially in the context of meeting women.
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SPEAKER_01
Go ahead and be more respectful than you think you need to be, which I think is an awesome quote, by the way.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I think so, too.
2
SPEAKER_01
Best Ella.
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SPEAKER_01
Woman, entrepreneur, inventor, chef, partner, definitely not a girl.
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SPEAKER_00
I would never get that wrong, Ella.
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SPEAKER_00
Thank you so much for sending me that.
2
SPEAKER_00
I totally agree with this.
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SPEAKER_00
I just never thought about it and had not occurred to me before.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s why I asked the AOC family before.
2
SPEAKER_00
Why can t I put my finger on it?
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SPEAKER_00
My gut had said don t use the word girl in place of women, and I ve done it before, and I ve been corrected on it by other guys, often who are older, and I think like, okay, all right, fine, you know, I gotta figure this out.
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SPEAKER_00
But this was something that I was wondering about, so Eloy, I think you nailed it.
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SPEAKER_01
I ve got a pro tip for this week s audience.
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SPEAKER_01
When you get out of a theater destination, like seeing Hamilton with your little brother who s 25 years old and can t figure out how to get a cab to where you re going to go for dinner, go to the closest hotel.
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SPEAKER_01
They always have cabs handily, readily available.
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SPEAKER_01
If you don t have Uber or Lyft and you need to get a cab, go to a hotel.
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SPEAKER_01
They will hook you up instantly.
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SPEAKER_00
I m surprised people don t know that, but I have told many people, oh, go down the block to the hotel there.
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SPEAKER_00
Because a lot of times, especially in Manhattan or something like that, you can t get one to stop.
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SPEAKER_00
But they re all going to the hotels to pick up the guests because they think they re going to the airport.
2
SPEAKER_01
And they also have deals with the hotels to hook them up.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, sometimes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
And they ll wait there and they ll let you load your stuff in and they play by the rules and they don t run over your foot, generally.
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SPEAKER_00
So good tip.
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SPEAKER_01
I would not like my foot run over.
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SPEAKER_01
My foot has gone through enough in my AOC tenure.
2
SPEAKER_01
I do not want it run over by a cab.
2
SPEAKER_00
By the way, one quick note, if you ask me to answer a question in an email and say, don t use this on Fanmail Friday, I gotta be honest, I just can t do it.
2
SPEAKER_00
There has to be value for the audience here, for the AOC family here.
2
SPEAKER_00
If I craft a reply and a solution to your issue, it s gotta be something I can share with people.
2
SPEAKER_00
I will always change your name, I will always change identifying details, and that s enough.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m consistently surprised by people who will write a long letter and then insist that absolutely nothing in that letter can become public.
2
SPEAKER_00
Now look, while this show has a strong listenership, 3 million as of this past January, I think some people are overly paranoid about this, or perhaps this is something a little bit more self-important or ego-based, I don t know.
2
SPEAKER_00
I ve seen that people s problems, while involved, are seldom that unique.
2
SPEAKER_00
So if you craft a question and you send it and you say at the end, please don t say anything about this on the show ever, I m just gonna archive it, please don t do that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Save yourself the trouble.
2
SPEAKER_00
But don t worry, I m not going to read your name or the name of the firm or the name of your ex-wife or the name of whatever on the show.
2
SPEAKER_00
I get that, we understand this.
2
SPEAKER_00
I just wanna be very clear, because this week I felt like I archived 25, 30 emails where people were like, please don t use this on the show.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I said, fine, I won t.
2
SPEAKER_00
Click, done.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s just a waste of their time and it s a waste of hours to even read it.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, come on, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday already wrote in.
2
SPEAKER_01
So if we know how to change your identity.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, come on.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
You re allowed to think your own pseudonym if you want to.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, we might not use it, but you can think of your own for sure.
2
SPEAKER_00
Also, I got the best ice cube tray ever.
2
SPEAKER_00
Jason, get up with Jen and get this link to this ice cube tray.
2
SPEAKER_00
I know people are thinking, what?
2
SPEAKER_00
Who gives a crap about ice cube trays?
2
SPEAKER_00
This thing is the ice cube tray that should have been invented 30 years ago.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s made out of this some kind of rubbery plastic thing so you can push the cubes up and they come out.
2
SPEAKER_00
You don t have to twist it, you don t have to shake it, you don t have to throw it up in the air and hope a bunch of them don t land on the floor.
2
SPEAKER_00
You just push them up one by one.
2
SPEAKER_00
They make great cubes, they re big enough, they don t crack like a lot of the smaller ones do, and then you leave it up so you know when you need to make more stinkin  ice.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, you young little man.
2
SPEAKER_01
You have never been to Bed Bath & Beyond before, have you?
2
SPEAKER_01
I haven t ever been there.
2
SPEAKER_01
Jen got this.
2
SPEAKER_01
I go there every week, and yes, these are silicone ice cube trays.
2
SPEAKER_01
They are fantastic.
2
SPEAKER_01
We will definitely put a link in the show notes.
2
SPEAKER_01
And you get them in great shapes.
2
SPEAKER_01
I have Tie Fighter.
2
SPEAKER_01
Ice cube trays, by the way, because I m a Star Wars nerd.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
You can get them in many shapes and they re silicone and you can push them up one by one.
2
SPEAKER_01
And they re awesome.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I can t believe that not everybody has these.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is incredible.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, maybe I m just like sheltered from Bed Bath and Beyond, but I m telling you, people are going to hate they re going to we re going to get email about the show like, you know, not my favorite fan mail Friday, ice cube trays, get a cab at a hotel.
2
SPEAKER_00
What the hell s wrong with you guys?
2
SPEAKER_00
Where s the real advice?
2
SPEAKER_00
We re just dropping the knowledge, man.
2
SPEAKER_00
Come on.
2
SPEAKER_00
Just dropping the knowledge, guys.
2
SPEAKER_00
Just dropping the knowledge.
2
SPEAKER_00
I also got a kick-ass pair of socks.
2
SPEAKER_00
They re called Stance.
2
SPEAKER_00
I highly recommend them.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m totally replacing all my old socks.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I m going to step in as producer.
2
SPEAKER_01
You re never allowed to mention them again unless they are an advertiser on the show.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay.
2
SPEAKER_01
You got it.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s it.
2
SPEAKER_01
But they ll be in the show notes.
2
SPEAKER_01
They ll be in the show notes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Hope y all enjoyed that.
2
SPEAKER_00
Don t forget, you can email us friday at theartofcharm.com to get your questions answered on the air.
2
SPEAKER_00
A link to the show notes for this episode can be found at theartofcharm.com slash fmf103.
2
SPEAKER_00
I d love to hear, oh.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, yeah, wait.
2
SPEAKER_00
I d also love to hear from you on Twitter.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m on Twitter at The Art of Charm.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s a great way to engage with the show.
2
SPEAKER_00
Jason, are you on Twitter?
2
SPEAKER_00
I am on Twitter at JPDef.
2
SPEAKER_00
At J-P-D-E-F?
2
SPEAKER_00
Nice.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s right.
2
SPEAKER_01
You got a tiny little Twitter handle there, buddy.
2
SPEAKER_01
My first Twitter handle was Jay.
2
SPEAKER_01
Wow.
2
SPEAKER_01
Not bad.
2
SPEAKER_01
I was in the first 140 users of Twitter, so, sorry.
2
SPEAKER_00
That is cray.
2
SPEAKER_00
Also, don t forget about the Art of Charm Challenge.
2
SPEAKER_00
Text CHARMED, that s C-H-A-R-M-E-D, to 33444 in the U.S.
2
SPEAKER_00
or everywhere else.
2
SPEAKER_00
Just go to theartofcharm.com.
2
SPEAKER_00
We re taking it step-by-step on becoming better at making connections, both personal and professional, becoming a better networker, increasing your social capital, your charisma, your magnetism, if you will, and it s for both guys and women, so check that out.
2
SPEAKER_00
Text CHARMED, that s C-H-A-R-M-E-D, to 33444 in the U.S.A.
2
SPEAKER_00
Everywhere else, just go to theartofcharm.com.
2
SPEAKER_00
Quick shout out to Jeff Ammons, he s a friend of Alex Kutz, who s a former AOC guest, and he s a fellow AOC fan himself, and he s working on some cool stuff up here in San Francisco.
2
SPEAKER_00
We got a lot of these tech guys that sort of listen, they re quiet, they don t engage with the show, but they re all over it.
2
SPEAKER_00
And Philip, aka Foxy T, who got over cancer.
2
SPEAKER_00
He got over cancer, yeah, he got over cancer.
2
SPEAKER_00
He loved the Art of Charm podcast.
2
SPEAKER_00
He listened in the hospital and he used a lot of it as motivation to kind of keep on going.
2
SPEAKER_00
Super cool story, he wrote about it in a blog.
2
SPEAKER_00
I hope we added some sunshine to your days there in the hospital, unless of course you had skin cancer, in which case I hope we did not add any sunshine at all.
2
SPEAKER_00
That shout out went downhill really quickly.
2
SPEAKER_00
Thanks for being a fan, Phil.
2
SPEAKER_00
Glad you re still with us in every sense of the word.
2
SPEAKER_00
Are you in a strange land listening to my familiar voice?
2
SPEAKER_00
If so, hit me up and I ll shout you out.
2
SPEAKER_00
More from AOC at theartofcharm.com, including info on our live residential boot camps.
2
SPEAKER_00
We run those every single week here in LA.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you want to dig into this stuff and work on your AOC skills with us as your coaches, that s bootcamp.theartofcharm.com.
2
SPEAKER_00
Now stay charming, get out there and connect, and leave everyone better than you found them.