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Welcome back to the Advanced Selling Podcast, the longest running sales training podcast, podcast history.
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I m Bill Kasky.
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Brian Neal on this end.
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Hey there, Brian.
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Used to be together, now we re not.
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We re virtual.
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We should do, we need to do, we need to get back.
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We need to do a couple of rooms.
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Just, you know, a couple of live ones.
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We are live, most people, you know, we re live, but we re not in the same room, per se.
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What is per se?
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Is that French?
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Per se, French?
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Per se, yeah.
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Per se.
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Per se, yeah.
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I imagine it s got a little thing with an E. It feels like it, per se.
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And what does it mean then?
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I don t know what it means.
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I say it all the time.
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How many things do we say that we don t know what they mean?
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That s one of my language.
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Yeah.
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Or say, I don t know what it means.
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All right.
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For one, one for all.
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I don t know.
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I ll look it up.
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Fact checker, Doug.
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Time to bring it back.
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Doug Drozen, everybody.
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Fact checker, Doug.
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Absent all year.
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His business is blowing up as he listens to the advanced selling podcast.
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Let s call that what that is, right?
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You can t handle all the clients he s got.
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I m telling you.
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Hey, if you have not yet downloaded, I m not talking to you, Brian, I m talking to our listeners here.
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If you have not yet downloaded the Insider Secrets document, we ve had it downloaded several hundred times so far.
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It s a culmination, accumulation of a lot of the content from our ASP Insider program.
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You can go to advancedsellingpodcast.com slash insidersecrets.
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We ll put it in the show notes, so it ll be an easy click on your phone.
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But that s what we would suggest you do.
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And there s also a little mini offer in there too, that I will, I ll have to surprise you when you get it.
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Bravo.
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Me likey.
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So I had the, uh, I don t know what you call this, like a first, uh, I was flying home from my game Sunday night late.
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It was from, it was Denver.
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And, uh, it was a flight that comes back to Indy late.
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Um, not too late, but you know, it s get you home like one or two in the morning.
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And there was a young mom and her son.
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Her son was probably five or seven, I think.
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Kid was one of the most polite kids I d ever seen.
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So I gave her a compliment.
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I said, hey, I had a bunch of kids too at one point, and really can tell you ve done a great job with manners and stuff.
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And he s very polite.
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And so she s asked me what I did.
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I said, I m reffing.
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And oh, gosh, we re huge fans, this and that.
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So I said, it would be OK if I gave your son something.
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She s, oh, that s fine.
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So I gave him my hat that I d worn in the game, because we get a lot of hats.
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And so I gave him my hat.
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And I autographed the bill of it.
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I have the same signature I signed to little kids always.
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It just says, his name is Gavin.
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He said, Gavin, always be a good sport.
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Brian Neal, umpire 92.
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The look on this kid s face when I gave him this hat was like he had met Santa Claus.
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He was so excited.
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And I thought, what a...
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thing to remember.
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We forget sometimes the impact you can have on someone with the littlest thing.
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Like to me, I m giving away this sweaty hat.
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And so it s just a reminder to take moments and it doesn t have to be an NFL ref hat.
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It could be anything.
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It could be paying for something or a compliment to somebody.
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But even think about the
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compliment, you paid the mother, and you probably the yes, I probably overheard it too.
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Even that, even I noticed your behavior, I noticed what a little man you are in a good, you know, yeah, how courteous you I could see that that yeah, that even without the hat would have been I know, I know.
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So this is just your little reminder to look for ways to give people earned compliments, you know, not not, not what I call it.
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when you pat someone on the head, patronizing, not patronizing, not those, just the real ones.
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Because we missed those opportunities.
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I thought, man, if I hadn t said that or done anything, the kid would have gone.
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He would have been fine.
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But I m like, there you go.
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It s just nice.
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So it just made me feel good.
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It just seems like all of us little children and the little children within us are all looking to be acknowledged and noticed, not praised and not applauded for.
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Just sometimes we just like to,
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Like I was, I m working with this one client and we just started working with them and I was working with one of the VPs and she was fairly new to the organization and she just ramrodded this thing, got it going, drove it and it happened.
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And I called her one day, and I said, you know, I just want to tell you that you ve done an awesome job of bringing the team together and doing your work.
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And I m not patronizing you.
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I just want to tell you that rarely have I seen somebody orchestrate things.
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And I thought she was going to cry.
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She called me back and said, you know, you don t know how much I appreciate that.
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customer that I should be saying this to, but I think I probably went a little further just with the acknowledgement.
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So if you, yeah, you re right, Brian, if you haven t acknowledged somebody, spouse, child, somebody you see on the street is doing, catch them doing something right, I think that s huge.
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It s great.
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It s so good for everybody, you know, and everyone says, be kind.
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I m like, well, that s part of it.
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You know what I mean?
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Yeah.
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So that was it.
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That was fun, though.
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I ll just be interested to see if that kid grows up to own an NFL team and fires me or something like that down the road.
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And he s like, I remember you.
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You gave me hell.
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Yeah, that s fine.
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I spelled my name wrong.
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Yeah.
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OK, topic today.
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You want to tee it up for us?
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Yeah, I ll tee it up.
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The topic is motivation.
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And the reason I thought that might be an interesting topic
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frame of mind at this time of year, where we re planning for next year.
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But we re still trying to close up 2022.
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And we ve got holidays.
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We ve got pressures.
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We ve got the dark winter of the economy that we think might be coming.
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We don t know.
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All those things together, I think, sometimes can suck the life out of us.
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For me, this time of year does it anyway.
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And couple that with this economy thing that s hanging over our head, even though I m not so worried about that.
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But it is a time of year where I sometimes just need to refocus on why I m in this business, what I m here to do.
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And I think it fits under that category of motivation.
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So that s why I thought it would be a good topic.
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I think it s fantastic.
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I think it s important for you as the listener to let this topic hit you where you are, because in one of the, we did hours and hours of pre-show prep on this episode, as Bill and I always do.
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Hours, hours.
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It was more like 90 seconds, but Bill said something interesting.
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All of us are in different stages of life.
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Some of you are just graduated from college.
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Some of you in your VP of sales, new role, and you re in your late thirties, early forties.
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Some of you in your fifties, some in the sixties, some in the eighties, who knows?
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And that word motivation, I think, changes over life.
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And so as you re listening to us riff on this a little bit, just think about where you are with it right now and let it hit you where it hits you.
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I think that s an important thing.
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Let the topic hit you where it hits you.
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So I am, motivation for me, this is again, have you seen the stats on the happiness curve?
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Have you seen the happiness curve stats?
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I have not.
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If you Google happiness curve, it should come up.
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Essentially, it s basically like a bit of a horseshoe.
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So you re really happy as a kid.
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And then as you get a little older, your teens, it starts to go down.
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And then it bottoms out in your 30s and 40s, like late 30s, early 40s.
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And then it starts to go back up.
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And that s happening to me.
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I m 52.
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I m going to be 53 in a little bit.
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And my wife is 40.
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And she s super happy.
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And I can just tell she
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gets angst over things that I just don t get angst over anymore.
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It just doesn t register.
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Cause I just know everything s going to be okay and work out.
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And she still needs the space to go through that herself.
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I think, um, that s my wife.
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So, um, or you could yell at her.
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That might, I was like, it s a workout.
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Relax, chill, just relax.
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That always goes over well.
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Just chill, relax.
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We ll be fine.
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It s worse.
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Why are you so uptight?
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Chill out.
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Well, I think that just comes with knowing that things are going to work out.
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We ve been through, like I ve got a client in the financial planning business and a lot of his reps were 19 when the last, when 2008 happened, when the big meltdown, economic meltdown.
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So they have not lived through any kind of a meltdown or a winter of any kind like this.
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And with inflation and the market, of course, they re dependent on their state of being with the market, unfortunately.
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These people have never been through that.
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So he has, and you have, and I have with a lot of different ups and downs.
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And I think you just get to the point where it s like, yeah, it comes back.
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It always, everything comes back.
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Yeah, it does.
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And it does.
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But therein goes to the topic of
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motivation is, is knowing that everything will be fine.
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A detriment to our motivation.
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Yeah.
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Right.
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Yeah.
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I m like, you know, I think everything s going to be fine.
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So I can just like par for the course, buckle down, just chill.
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And, you know, I know it s a little bit, but, or is there something deeper?
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So
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Yeah, here s a thought that I had, and I ll tee this up this way is, I ve read a lot about it over the years, or a little bit about it, and there s really
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two types.
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There s the external or extrinsic motivation, which is I m motivated to accomplish things, to earn money, to win the prize in the sales contest.
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Intrinsic motivation is where I m motivated just by the work that I do and the doing of the work.
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I might even be motivated by the pursuit of a goal, but I m not necessarily motivated by the goal itself.
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And a lot of people have said, look, you kind of need both.
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If it s only external and you hate what you do, but you re doing a lot of it because you want to get to a goal, that s a lousy way to go through life.
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Terrible way to go through life.
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If you re only intrinsically motivated and you don t really care about goals, you re probably not going to set things that are, you know, outside your comfort zone or you re not going to expand and grow accordingly.
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So those aren t, that s not good either.
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So I, to me, it s trying to find that balance between intrinsic where I just love what I do.
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And I know you and I both talk about that on the podcast a lot.
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We love what we do.
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I can t imagine.
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I was at a wedding Saturday night, and I was talking to a lady, a girl who s my daughter s colleague from school, and she s in the mental health business, and she coaches parents and students when they have loneliness, depression, fatigue, things like that.
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And we were talking about coaching, and she goes, every day, I love going to work because I get to help people.
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And that s intrinsic motivation.
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Whatever she makes, she makes, but she loves the work itself.
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I d be curious to know what you, how you weigh in on both of those elements of motivation.
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I love weddings.
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I mean, is that?
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Yeah.
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Well, let s drink a lot.
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I think it s great.
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I, I, uh, I wrote down, I loved what you said here.
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This is something you need to go listen to that.
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Everyone, what Bill just said.
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I wrote down shift the source, shift the source, shift the source to me means I need to really examine my source of motivation and ask myself, do I need to shift this shift?
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Doesn t mean to change.
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It just means to shift it.
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You can shift it a little bit or a lot.
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You can scoot it.
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You can nudge it.
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That s all shifting.
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It s just a little movement.
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But think about that over time to be more aware than we are then before you listen to this episode of where that source of motivation is coming from.
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Because I do believe that in selling, it is, by its nature, extrinsically.
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Is extrinsically a word?
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Extrinsically motivated.
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It s the scoreboard, the KPIs, the income, the debt.
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And we talk about it.
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And those things are great.
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There s very little attention given to the intrinsic motivation.
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Almost none, right?
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Think about it at your last sales meeting.
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How much time was devoted to intrinsic motivation?
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Yes.
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And almost zero.
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So if nobody is giving it attention in your hierarchy of leadership, if you have that at your company, you have to pay attention to it.
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There s no reason that you can t pay attention to your own intrinsic motivation.
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Yes.
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So good.
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So good.
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So let s talk about some, maybe some actions or tips that you would recommend people at this time of year as they re planning next year and keeping the Mo, Joe alive.
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I don t know if this, I m trying to roll this thing in here and I don t know if it ll fit neat and tidy.
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So this is a tip.
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Now this is for the younger listener here.
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Younger s relative, of course.
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So think of those listeners who are in their teens and 20s.
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Teens and 20s by definition.
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So if you re between the ages of 13, I don t know if we have a lot of 13 year old listeners.
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We have a big high school.
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I wonder if we do have any high school kids.
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It s like a business.
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class or something.
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That would be interesting to see.
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Up to 29.
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There s a really cool little TED talk by this woman named Meg Jay.
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It s old.
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It s about nine years old or so.
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It s called Why 30 is Not the New 20.
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Because we are taught in our 20s, like, well, you ll find your way.
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Just be patient.
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Life will work out.
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It ll be fine.
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And she comes up with some data that says that s not actually accurate.
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Actually, the habits that you create in your 20s completely dictate where you go in your 30s, 40s, and 50s.
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And so examining those traits and behaviors and things that you re doing, who you hang out with, do you exercise, do you not, do you eat healthy?
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What do you do with your money?
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All these habits that we are creating in our 20s actually continue on.
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And she has a really interesting take, because I d always been a believer of, yeah, 20s, you ll figure it out.
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That s when you re, you know, you re lost.
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You know what you re doing.
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She s like, you really need to figure out what you re doing in your 20s, because that s really going to set it apart.
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So if you re in that age bracket, the advice piece here is to be intentional.
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In 23, be intentional about the habits that you want to create now.
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Think about all those aspects of your money, of your career, of your job, and have this shift of the source as part of that.
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Shift that earlier and sooner so that you can tap into that and be happier longer.
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That s the deal.
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Shift that sooner, like your daughter s friend, like Kara s friend, who says, I love there aren t too many 20-year-olds that say that.
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gosh, I love going to work.
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Most 20 years.
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No, they don t say I like I like the money.
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Yeah, I think I m up for a promotion next year.
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Yeah, totally.
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What about the work?
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Yeah, it s okay.
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We have a great culture.
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Yeah, they re very supportive of me.
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But where s the purpose in that?
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Right?
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Where s like you said, the intrinsic drive?
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Where s that?
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versus the extrinsic.
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Yeah.
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You like your ball?
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Yeah, I like her.
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Yeah.
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And because most of those people have never experienced any downturn, their extrinsic motivations are going to disappear on them.
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Then they re going to be left empty.
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Exactly.
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Right?
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They re just going to not know what to do.
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Maybe that s the link of, regardless of how old you are, if it s all about extrinsic and there is a downturn or there s a pause, you ve got to find the other motivation.
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And I m going to add to that and say that
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I think we have to habitualize the process that we go through to accomplish the goals.
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So you talked about habits there in the 20s.
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I would say, what do you really enjoy doing?
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Like, I know in my business, I really enjoy creating video content.
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I don t know if I m any good at it, but I enjoy doing it.
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And so over the last three or four months, I ve doubled down on it and it pays dividends versus cold calling.
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I don t enjoy cold calling.
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So I ve got a fight I never have.
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You always have to find something else that you really like doing that will get you to the same place, but maybe in a different way.
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And what s funny, what you just said, and you do, you re a master at video, and you love to do it, and you re really good at it, and the dividends part is like the 10% at the end.
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Right?
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It just is.
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Cause you love the process, the artistic part of it, even the shooting.
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I mean, I know you took film class back in the day, just so great.
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And so then of course it pays dividends cause you re doing what you love to do and what you re good at.
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You know, we re too often, we re like, okay, I m going to make a video to try to go viral, to try to get this many signups, to get this many clients.
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And we work on the extrinsic parts first.
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So that s really the tip here throughout this first section is the first of 19 sections that we re going to do.
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This is a multi-section episode.
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As you look at your goals for next year, look at some of the things that you re going to have to do to get there and make sure that there s a fair number of those that you really enjoy, that bring you joy, bring you creative license that are not in there, just you tolerate them, but you really like doing
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You ll just be better at it.
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You ll do more of it.
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And I think that would be a decent lesson to take away as an action.
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SPEAKER_00
Yes, I think it s a great thing to do.
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SPEAKER_01
All right.
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SPEAKER_01
Do I have time to squeeze one?
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SPEAKER_00
Almost at the end of the reel.
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SPEAKER_01
I m on reel to reel today.
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SPEAKER_01
It s going really fast.
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SPEAKER_01
The catch of the catch reel is like flying right now.
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SPEAKER_01
We re slowed down when we get there.
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SPEAKER_00
We re feeding the catch.
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SPEAKER_01
Is that what it was?
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SPEAKER_01
Back in the old cart days?
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SPEAKER_01
Splicing.
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SPEAKER_01
People don t realize that s what you did.
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SPEAKER_01
You like literally spliced a tape together to edit.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, I ll say for motivation, I would examine
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the behaviors that you do that fulfill your motivation, that light you up.
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I would also examine the ones that put the flame out, because all of us have those.
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And you can, this is kind of more of a backward look, so you can hone in on it better to say, what does, boy, I m really up and going, and I look forward to when I m doing this behavior.
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SPEAKER_01
And when I have to do that behavior, man, I don t want to go.
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SPEAKER_01
I want to hide under the covers.
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Sucks the life out of me.
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SPEAKER_01
And do everything you can to get that second behavior out of your life.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_00
Delegated, forget it.
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SPEAKER_00
Stop doing it.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
I mean, shoot, some of you can do this with clients.
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SPEAKER_01
You know, some of you can do this with, you know, like, oh, I ve got these two clients that I always have to drive two hours to and they re a pain in the butt and dah, dah, dah, dah, dah.
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SPEAKER_01
Give them away.
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Just give them away.
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Then they re out, you know, that sort of thing.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that s it.
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SPEAKER_00
That s good.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay.
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SPEAKER_00
We d love to hear from you.
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SPEAKER_00
Go to advanced only podcast.com slash LinkedIn.
1
SPEAKER_00
If you have not joined our LinkedIn group, make sure you go there and comment on this episode.
1
SPEAKER_00
We ll put it up there.
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SPEAKER_00
And we d like to hear what you think about this whole motivation thing.
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SPEAKER_00
We didn t get into a ton of detail because we re not scientists.
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SPEAKER_00
We re
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We re not motivational scientists or behavioral scientists, but we do wrestle with that for ourselves and our teams and also our clients.
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So we brought you some value today.
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SPEAKER_00
Yes.
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SPEAKER_01
And don t forget to go to advancedsellingpodcast.com slash insider secrets.
2
SPEAKER_01
If you have not downloaded the 10 secret pieces of content from 2022, I think you ll find it interesting.
2
SPEAKER_02
I m going to go walk on some hot coals.
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SPEAKER_02
Let s go.
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SPEAKER_02
Motivated.
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SPEAKER_02
All right.
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SPEAKER_02
All right.
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SPEAKER_02
Bye.