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This week on the Advanced Selling Podcast, Brian Neal is on assignment.
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He never tells me where his assignment is, but he always thinks that s cool to say.
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I m Bill Kasky.
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I will be your host today, and we re going to play you some clips from last Friday s Insider event where we talked about limiting beliefs.
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I think you re going to like this.
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Hey, everybody, Bill Kasky, back at the Advanced Selling Podcast.
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As I said in the opening, I m going to share with you some clips from a program we did in our Insider Initiative.
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Insider meets once per month for 75 minutes, and it s for our listeners who want to dive a little bit deeper into their own personal growth and strategies that can help them grow and make more money.
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that happens usually the first or second Friday of the month at noon.
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In this month s training we talk about limiting beliefs and it s been our thought, and Brian and I have done some programming on this in the past, not much but a little bit, that
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We can learn all the sales tactics and strategies and language and all the clever moves, but if you re stuck in your beliefs and you re stuck with, do I deserve to earn more money?
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Or do I deserve to call on the CEO?
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Or what are my beliefs about my role in professional selling?
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If you can t get those right, then it s like one foot on the accelerator and one foot on the brake.
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We all have them, as I said in this program.
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This is not you and not us.
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This is all of us.
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We constantly have to be taking stock of what we believe and how, when we are off track, it probably has something to do with our beliefs.
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But we don t usually look there.
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We usually look for something external to us in the market.
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Can I get a better YouTube channel?
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Or should I create a podcast?
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And sometimes I think we have to look internal first.
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And then there might be some things outside.
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So this was divided up into three parts.
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One was I just gave a little lecture.
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There was some exercises and then lessons at the end.
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I know it s going to be a little bit hard to follow, but I think you ll kind of get it.
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The first question out of the box really was what part of your business life is not working and can we assign a belief issue to it?
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So hope you enjoy.
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If you can become more conscious and aware of the beliefs that we take with us every day.
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And by the way, I say you, I mean we, because I m gonna share with you some of my erroneous beliefs and some of the things that I struggle with to see if it would help you kind of identify some of those things.
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So this is a we thing.
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I think we ll naturally be able to tweak or modify those in a way that allows us more success and more success unfolds.
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In this next section, I introduce the insiders to a book called The Untethered Life.
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It s by Dr. Michael Singer.
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And so when I refer to him or the book, that s what I m referring to.
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But he addresses this thing in there called samskaras.
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And a samskara, if you re familiar with Sanskrit, if you speak Sanskrit, who speaks Sanskrit?
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Nobody.
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But it s really about emotionally charged events
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that are part of our past that shape our thinking today.
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If we were in eighth grade and we re giving a speech and part of speech class and people started laughing and whispering and booing us off the stage and we got a D minus on the speech, that might have an impact on you later in life.
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You might today not like to give speeches because of something like that.
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I know that sounds minor.
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It s like, well, we re all belittled when we re children.
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But if it s an emotionally charged event, emotionally charged means it had meaning to me.
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I thought I was going to deliver a great speech, and they booed me off the stage.
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That could be something that s emotionally charged.
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So that would be a scar.
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That would be something that, until we let go of that,
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Until we let go of that event, it becomes everything we look at gets filtered through that event.
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Another thing he talks about in here is recapturing the positive.
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This has happened to me where you go out with some friends, and you go to a steakhouse, and you have a great time, and the energy is good, and everybody s having fun, and you re playing games and everything.
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And then a month later, you say to your partner or spouse, hey, let s go back to that restaurant.
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That was really a good time.
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And you go back, and it ain t the same.
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Food s not the same.
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Company s not the same.
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Stories aren t the same.
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It s just you and your spouse or a couple other people sitting there trying to relive.
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And so in Singer s book, he says, sometimes we have positively charged events, things that we want to redo, we want to repeat.
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And if we are too focused on that, we will be disappointed.
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So this is not just a matter of negative and positive.
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It s about how did the emotional reaction affect us.
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Paragraph two there, I say, find an area of your business life
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that is not where you want it to be.
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It could be personal income.
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It could be ease with which you attract leads.
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It could be controlling the sales process.
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It could be something like I m uncomfortable when I talk to CEOs or I m uncomfortable asking to get in front of the CEO or a higher level person.
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It doesn t matter what it is.
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I want you to write down
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on your paper, I m just going to give you a minute of quiet time, to write down what is that one area.
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It could be something really small.
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Remember, we re just practicing here.
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We re not trying to change lives here.
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We re just practicing.
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So find an area of your business life that s just not where you want it to be.
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It s just not working as well as it could.
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And I want you to write that down.
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Don t go to step two, just write that down.
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So I d like you to do a little soul searching here.
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I m going to put on some quieter music.
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And I want you to think through three possible limiting beliefs that are in your way from getting to a new future here.
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I say solving this problem.
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I don t know if I want to put it that way.
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But whatever you wrote down on that first line, I want you to think, what are three possible limiting beliefs that might be in your way here?
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This is something that I ve looked into and a lot of, you know, the process here is what we re doing right now is kind of I ve put down some stuff that I can trace back to.
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events, the way my dad treated me, the way my mom treated me, and the triggers that I get today.
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So I ll give you an example just real quick.
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If I go into a meeting and someone has the same characteristics as someone significant in my early childhood, they will trigger some emotions in me.
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And I see that now plainly, but I didn t know this
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five years ago, 10 years ago.
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So this is good stuff.
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Yeah, being super conscious of that, you don t have to be obsessed with it, you just notice.
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You know, I m pretty deep into my career.
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I m 30 years into my career.
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And as I m thinking about, as I was thinking about this exercise, I m thinking about how much I ve designed my career around some of these beliefs.
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I think that s one of the things that s been kind of one of my takeaways is, you know, what are the actions that I currently take that result in my kind of avoid, maybe avoidance?
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Interesting.
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That s a real, real interesting observation.
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And I had some light bulbs go off when you just said that.
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Look, I m going to share a bit more about actually what I ve done here, but I m going to say something that sounds weird, but things have always come really easily to me.
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I have a way of getting things done and it s made me lazy in certain areas.
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So my thing is, I ve said, you know, the area that I want to get better at is focus, because sometimes I ll leave things to the last minute.
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Like one of the beliefs I wrote down is I m more focused outside of work hours.
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So during work hours, I focus on the things I think are fun.
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And then I spend the weekend having no life because I ve got to get the job done.
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But those beliefs are really hard to change, but they stop you from going from one level to the next because you just coast because you can.
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The change for me was I ve got to somehow, you know, I ll give you one example.
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I ve said here, one of my beliefs is that everything will work out because it always has.
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And the resourceful belief I put down was things will work out if I prioritize and get them done.
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Making that mental shift.
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Things come easy.
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Certain things come easy for you.
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There are probably some things that don t come easy for you.
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And as you expand your comfort zone, maybe that s something you could consider too, is, you know what, this has never come easy.
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How do I make that come easy?
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How do I change my beliefs so this thing comes easy?
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And maybe there s just a little expansion there.
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I don t know.
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I m not coaching.
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That s interesting.
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I was going to add one last thing.
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I meditate a lot on sales-related things.
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I focus on
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being confident or my mindset and helping people and whatever.
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And I ve always done that.
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And it s been really helpful.
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It s been everything.
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But this area that s not where I wanted to be, I wrote down something that I ve never meditated about.
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And it s probably my biggest obstacle to selling right now.
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And it just never occurred to me.
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It s because it was based on facts that aren t changeable, that are out of my control.
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And then when I started, I just
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like a page and a half of how it actually is kind of in control.
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Wow, cool.
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In this next part of the workshop, I broke them up into groups, and they were to not only share the limiting belief that they had in the area that we focused on, but also any resourceful beliefs, liberty, liberating beliefs, beliefs that they could, if they could believe them, could really remedy this situation.
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So when you hear me talk about the two things, the resourceful beliefs, we ask them to do too.
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So I suggest you do the same thing, and I ll put a little music on here so that you can do that.
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I m going to break up into groups of two.
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The assignment is I want you to share, to the extent you re comfortable, what your issue was that you wanted to improve, what the limiting beliefs are about that, and then any resourceful beliefs or liberating beliefs that you have.
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Be present with the other person.
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I know you all are.
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Don t criticize because again, these are deep things.
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So just hold space.
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As I say, hold space.
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I m going to give you about 10 minutes.
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We re going to come back and talk about a way to take this further.
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My question is, did you get anything out of this exercise?
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We don t have to go to everybody here, but I want to hear from a handful of you.
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What did you get specifically?
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Was it valuable?
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Was it not valuable?
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Well, one of my issues was that I feel like my clients have zero attention span, like they don t absorb anything.
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So I did get out of this, like how to set up maybe three, five minute meetings with people.
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and just ask a few questions in each meeting, kind of get it exciting so it s not overwhelming to spend 15 minutes or half an hour and they can t remember anything.
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So that was super helpful.
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Thank you.
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So that was the end.
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I hope you got some value out of that.
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We always go around at the end of these insider programs and ask people what they learned.
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We don t go around to all 30 or 40 people, but I always like to get a smattering of lessons from the group because I think when we hear lessons from someone else, it kind of gives us permission to adapt that lesson or adopt that lesson, I guess is proper.
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So anyway, I hope you enjoyed that.
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We might be doing this from time to time.
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If you re interested in being a part of Insider, as you know, you can go to advancedsellingpodcast.com slash insider.
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And we would love to have you in the group.
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But I also hope if you weren t there, that this was helpful to have you just start to think about and maybe use this as a launch point for what are my limiting beliefs?
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We all have them.
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None of us are free from them.
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The question is, is where might they get in the way?
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So hopefully you ve enjoyed this.
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Brian will be back next week, back to our regular programming.
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Enjoy.
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Bye.