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In this episode of the Advanced Selling Podcast, we talk about proper pregnancy etiquette, we tee up a future earworm episode, and we talk about the best sales advice that we ve ever gotten.
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Welcome back to the Advanced Selling Podcast, the longest running sales training podcast.
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I am Bill Kasky.
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And I m Brian Neal.
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I m one of your hosts.
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He s the other.
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That would be me.
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And we deliver what we think is pretty good content every Monday morning.
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And we release it at 6.30, right, Travis?
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6.30, 7, every Monday morning?
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I have no idea.
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We have no idea.
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We just do the show.
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We come in and record at 3.30 AM.
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And then edit it after that.
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We release it 6.30 or 7 AM.
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And one thing about us you ll know is that we love to hear from you.
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So if you have a question, a comment, a critique, something funny that s happened a couple of weeks ago, we played us back at half speed for 17 minutes.
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No, for 20 seconds.
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And so you just never know what kind of, our listeners have great sense of humor.
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Someone finally figured out that we were back masking.
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which you have to be a certain age to know what backmasking is.
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Isn t that what it s called?
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Backmasking?
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You ever heard that before?
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When you play an album backward and it says something different, it s like hidden meaning.
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Like Judas Priest.
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How do you make that happen though in the recording studio?
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I don t think you do.
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I think that s a joke.
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They said the Beatles put Paul is dead, because they were saying that Paul McCartney had died, and they put it in... If you listen to the Walrus backwards, it says Paul is dead.
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It s like, okay.
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Okie dokie.
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But anyway, so we would love to hear from you.
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You can conjure up a good question or comment, put it on your voice memo, and email it to us at listener at advancedsellingpodcast.com.
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We just had something happen in the lobby.
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Uh-oh.
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And we have a lot of female listeners, so I d be curious to get our lady listeners  opinion on this.
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What is proper to say to a woman who is expecting in a public scenario?
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So if you see a woman who s pregnant, and you re a co-worker.
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So we have a woman here who works here who s pregnant.
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And you know this.
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Yeah, you know.
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And they re like, oh, I hope we don t see you, because she s about to leave, they said.
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And the guy starts pegging her with questions.
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He goes, you having contractions?
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And I thought, that s kind of none of his business, is it?
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It s like, well, has your water broke?
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I m like, where does that start and stop?
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You know what I mean?
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Are you dilated yet?
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How many centimeters are you?
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It s like, stop with the questions, dude.
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Leave her alone.
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She s kind of done.
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You get to be at the end of the pregnancy.
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Isn t it weird how we go there instead of, tell me, are you excited about this?
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Totally.
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Yeah.
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Are you nervous?
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What are you looking forward to in motherhood?
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Right.
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Why d you decide to have a baby now or whatever?
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And it s never that, it s always dilation, two centimeters.
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So you re going to get induced if you don t go?
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You re going to nurse?
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You re going to nurse?
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It s like, I don t know.
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Have you ever commented on someone being pregnant who wasn t pregnant?
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No, but I ve heard that s a mistake.
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I did that one.
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I was 23 years old, sales admin.
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I didn t know.
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And I hadn t seen her in six months because I was out in the field and came back.
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And she had kind of a flowy sundress on.
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And I didn t know any better.
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And I said, I didn t know you were pregnant.
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She said, I m not.
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Oh.
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Never since then.
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Never.
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I m 23.
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I m 48.
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You don t even look at pregnant women anymore.
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You don t even talk to them.
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You could be 14 months pregnant with sextuplets.
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I won t say a word until you acknowledge that you re pregnant.
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I won t say a word.
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And she could be standing in front of you.
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Totally.
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And you will be just looking through her.
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Bumping into me, right?
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Totally.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Yeah, anyway, so I would love to get our female listeners to chime in on that topic.
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That would probably be a fun one.
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Well, probably the second story was not a good one.
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And probably neither one of them was.
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Negative, all right.
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Hey, before we get into our topic today, a few weeks ago, I gave Brian a trivia music question and quiz.
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And it was about the song by the group Reunion, a song called Radio, what was it called?
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And the radio rolled me.
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Life is a rock and the radio rolled me.
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And I ve had so many people either text me or email or on LinkedIn say, that song gets stuck in my head now.
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One guy said, I have not stopped thinking about that song for two weeks.
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So anyway, we ll keep doing that.
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We need to do that again next time.
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Do a little trivia.
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I know the world s worst earworm.
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I m not even going to, we ll do it.
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We ll play it.
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The world s worst earworm.
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You know what an earworm is?
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Uh-huh.
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Something that gets, yeah.
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I ve got one of those.
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OK.
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I think we ll play it next time.
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All right, topic.
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I was watching the Food Network, which is one of my favorite networks to watch.
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And there s a show on Food Network called The Best Thing I Ever Ate.
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And it s about, they have famous chefs on.
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They take one food group, so they might take pasta.
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Last night I was watching, they took ice cream.
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And they have these famous chefs talk about the best ice cream they ve ever had, no matter where it is in the world.
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And I got to thinking about a podcast episode about the best advice that I ever got or the best advice maybe that we ever gave.
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And so we re going to do an advice show today around the theme, which is what s the best advice we ever got or the best advice we ever gave.
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And I ve got three or four things.
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Bill has 3.5, he said.
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So as you look at your list, is this mainly for new,
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sales professionals, or is it irrelevant as to where they are?
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B for me, it s irrelevant here.
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Because I think, no matter how I know some of the elements of advice that I ve gotten have come midway through or towards the tail end of where we are now.
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So I think it doesn t matter.
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But you got this question from someone who was fairly new in sales.
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I did, yeah.
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I had someone, yes.
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He wanted to know kind of bottom line.
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Yeah, he was a young guy, came up to me after a speech and said, hey, if you could give me one piece of advice, what would it be?
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I m like, that s a really good question.
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Okay, well, I ve got a handful.
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Yeah, let s do it.
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Fire away.
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I ll start.
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Okay.
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This was a piece of advice I did not learn until I was probably 30 some years old and probably cost me a lot of money not to know it.
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And the advice is never present a price or a quotation before you find the problem to be solved.
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That s really good.
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And I think what I used to do is when a prospect would say, hey, can you shoot me a quote on these pencils?
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I need 100,000 of them.
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And just shoot me a quote.
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I would shoot a quote, and then we d get into a price battle.
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Because I never would find out the question, well, why are you even wanting me to quote?
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What s happening now with your current vendor?
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Of course, we talk about that a lot on the podcast.
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We talk a lot about it in the program called All In.
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That s our three-hour audio.
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program that you can find out more about at advancedsellingpodcast.com.
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But I don t think I ever did that before someone gave me some advice.
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And it s saved me a lot of time.
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Yes.
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And it s made me a lot of money.
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Yes.
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That s really, really good.
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Mine, in no particular order, came from our friend Dave Catalano.
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who you know.
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And it was actually more of a scenario than advice.
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But what I wrote down here is, always have a number.
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Always have a number.
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And what that means in anything.
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So what happens too often is,
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A salesperson is a commission earner, and people say, how much money do you plan to make?
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And every time that happens, people are like, hmm, well, uh, uh.
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There s no clarity around it.
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And so you need to have an income number for yourself always.
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If a recruiter calls you and says, hey, I ve got a great opportunity, you have to have a number.
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On the other side of that, in a sales scenario, you have to have a number.
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And too often, especially those of us who sell something that has some grayness to the pricing model, or it s not just a fixed price,
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When it s time, based on your first advice, after I find out problem, pain, and that sort of thing, now I m going to talk the economic side of it, I have to have my number ready.
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And too often, too, it s like, so how much is this going to be?
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And we get this, well, I hate what happens all the time.
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I m not really sure.
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I ve got to go back and look at some things.
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Nobody likes that.
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So you always need to have a number.
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Yeah, that s good.
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Yeah.
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And I would even say that or some kind of clear picture of how you want your life to look like, whether it s a financial life or a number of income number.
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I want to I want to earn a million dollars a year and I want to work 12 hours a week.
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Yep.
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Well, that s a number and we can do something with that.
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Yeah.
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Yes.
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Yeah.
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Here I had I said I had three and a half.
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I ve got one here.
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That s kind of a twosome number one part of it is have no Expectation and the second part of it is detached from the outcome.
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I think they re different and
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You know, this have no expectation is really out there, even though it sounds so simple.
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But how many times have we been taught by Zig Ziglar and all those guys who used to come in?
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No, seriously.
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I mean, they were all positive mental attitude.
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Expect that you re going to get all the business.
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Expect that that person is going to roll the red carpet out for you.
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Expect that they re going to share all of their personal issues so that you can help solve a problem.
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And I always think, well, that s terrible advice.
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Why would I expect anything?
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I expect to show up.
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I expect to do my best.
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I expect to be interested in the prospect.
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But beyond that, I have no expectation of what s going to happen.
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That s great.
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That is so great.
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And the corollary to that is I detach from the outcomes.
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And that is, you ve got to be careful with this.
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We ve talked about this a lot on our programs and in the episodes about what is detachment.
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It does not mean I don t care.
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It does not mean I sit back and wait
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wait for the prospect to call me back, it means that I am never more attached to the sale than the customer is in solving their problem.
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And so detachment is a spectrum of preponderance versus on or off switch.
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That s really good.
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That was a big sentence right there.
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Big sentence, preponderance.
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Wait till we listen to that in half speed.
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In slow motion.
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Preponderance, that could be a minute.
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You talk about, yeah.
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Someone that I guarantee, I know what those guys are doing right now.
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Philosophical talk, real slow, probably driving 25 in the left lane.
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Next is, I can t really attribute this to one person because of people that are like,
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Oh, like Wayne Dyer and Deepak Chopra.
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Talk about living your authentic self.
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And someone asked me this weekend about that.
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Like, what s the key to, you know?
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I said, you know, it s really living an authentic life.
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That s it.
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Once you get there, you re good.
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And I think you should be an authentic seller.
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You be you in the sales process.
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And whatever way, shape, or form that shows itself is mission critical, super, super important.
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It s so hard to do, though.
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So hard to do, because there s acting everywhere.
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There s always a temptation to do this, change that, be this way.
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Adopt a persona of some kind.
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Totally.
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Yeah.
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For approval, or acceptance, or to get a deal, or to fit in, or to make myself feel better about myself.
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What s our fear there?
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I think it s all sorts of things.
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I mean, part of it is that it s like, okay, I ll be, I m fearful that I ll be found out that I m not smart.
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I m fearful that I m not good enough.
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I m fearful.
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If I just am who I am.
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Yes.
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It won t be in and of itself.
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It ll be insufficient.
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Yes.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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I m fearful of rejection.
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I m fearful of not being loved or liked.
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I m fearful of not being accepted.
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All those sorts of things.
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Wow.
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Deep.
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Well, it is.
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I mean, that s a topic that is.
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Because how many times have you been called on by somebody, phone, face-to-face, and you know that the person who shows up in front of you is not the real them?
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Right.
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It s not the weekend them.
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It s not the after five them.
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It s not the romantic evening out with their spouse them.
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Correct.
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It s different.
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It s that badge of persona.
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Arm, it s almost like an armor.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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Yes.
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Yes Yeah, that s huge.
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That s a yes enormous.
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Okay.
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Here s one my final one in this series of What is the best sales advice I ve ever get given or gotten?
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They sell you you don t sell them
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Love it.
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And this is a difficult one, too, because we have quotas and goals and pressures, and we put this pressure on ourself, or our sales manager puts it on us.
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But when we get in front of a customer, we know technically, we know that the customer needs to be telling us why they want us or our product or a change of any kind.
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And yet, when we get in front of them, we default and resort to that old model of convince and persuade and defend.
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And again, we should probably, these are really good, Brian, we should devote a couple episodes, one each to maybe each of these.
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And maybe, and I know we have, I mean, we ve dedicated some time to this, but this whole, they sell you versus you sell them is a huge one.
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It s massive.
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And you know, it s funny, we re coming up as we re doing this, I m thinking each one of these becomes its own little episode, doesn t it?
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Seems that way.
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Yeah.
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My last one, again, is kind of buzzy right now.
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And I m almost afraid to say it, because I ll just say it, though.
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Find purpose in what you do.
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Find purpose in what you do if you don t leave.
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Now, that s a big thing.
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Like, I want to have this purpose driven.
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It s not even like altruism.
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But you have to find some connection to what you re doing.
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Because if you don t, you A, won t be successful, and B, won t be happy.
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Now, you can find purpose in unique ways.
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So you can actually find purpose that you provide for your family based on this job that you do, even though you re not purposeful about the actual job itself.
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So for instance, if I, which I did, so I worked for Procter & Gamble and I sold toilet paper.
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I didn t find purpose in that personally.
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Now, some people have found lots of purpose in the fulfillment that comes along with growing a business or working at a company like that for 30 years and retiring with $3 million in your bank account so you can have freedom or whatever.
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But you have to find, you have to connect to that, because if you just go through the motions, so to speak, you ll become a drone.
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You re just like a worker, and you won t be fulfilled, and you will not be as successful as you could be if you re not.
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So I saw a movie a long time ago with Steve Martin.
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Yeah.
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And he talks about purpose.
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Yeah.
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Is that the same?
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Is that the same?
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It s not the same.
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I know what that is.
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That s a good little callback.
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This is a good one, though, because what you just described.
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So when you were talking, I wrote down this.
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Work should be its own reward.
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And what that means is I think when you go into like the nursing profession or healthcare, people typically who are nurses, I ve got a sister-in-law who s a nurse and she s very caring.
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I mean, if we have a problem, she is there to help.
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I mean, she just has got a big heart and she s caring.
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So it doesn t surprise me she went into that profession.
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So she makes good money, but she doesn t even think about the money.
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She is focused on her patients, on outcomes, on giving them the proper nurturing and service when they re in there.
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That to me is its own reward.
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She is rewarded by the work she does versus being rewarded by the paycheck she gets for the work she does.
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Correct.
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So you mentioned the idea of your purpose could be your family.
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Could be.
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But that s not the work.
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No.
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But I m not disagreeing with you.
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It could be that.
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And if you can find something within the work that drives you, that s even better.
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Ideal for sure, yeah.
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If it s difficult, I just know some people, and I couldn t do this personally, I know people that have sort of trued that up in their mind that their work
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is strictly for providing for their family or a certain lifestyle.
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And they re cool with that.
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And they can do that.
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I can t do that.
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I couldn t do something all day every day that I didn t find purpose in beyond just the money that it provides.
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Yeah, because chances are, and I don t know if I always believe that, where they say, you know what?
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t care about the work.
1
SPEAKER_00
I care about what the money does.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t know if I believe that.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s fair.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because then you d be hopping around a lot because you d say, well, this job means nothing to me.
1
SPEAKER_00
I don t care about the products I m selling.
1
SPEAKER_00
I could go find money somewhere else.
1
SPEAKER_00
And you don t find people hopping that much, although you do a little bit.
1
SPEAKER_00
But that s a good point.
1
SPEAKER_00
That s a good point.
1
SPEAKER_00
Another whole episode.
1
SPEAKER_00
So what do you think about this?
1
SPEAKER_00
We re going to post this on LinkedIn.
1
SPEAKER_00
And make sure you comment on what is the best advice you ve ever gotten or given.
1
SPEAKER_00
And if you like any of these, let us know that, too.
1
SPEAKER_00
We d love to hear.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, we d love to hear the collection of advice that people have given, too.
1
SPEAKER_01
It s going to be a great little discussion.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, good.
1
SPEAKER_01
OK, that s it.
1
SPEAKER_01
If you haven t already done so, you want to come see us, want us to come see you, I should say, send us an email.
1
SPEAKER_01
Listener at advancelangepodcast.com.
1
SPEAKER_01
Put in the subject line, come see us.
1
SPEAKER_01
We ll get that rolling.
1
SPEAKER_01
And we will be sure to put, we mentioned earworms.
1
SPEAKER_01
We ll put some earworms on the next one.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, next time.
1
SPEAKER_00
People won t like it.
1
SPEAKER_00
I can t wait.
1
SPEAKER_00
They won t like it.
1
SPEAKER_00
All right, earworm episode next.
1
SPEAKER_00
Talk to you later.
1
SPEAKER_00
See you.
1
SPEAKER_01
Bye.
1
SPEAKER_01
Bye.