0
SPEAKER_01
Hello, Sashir.
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SPEAKER_01
Hello, Nicole.
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SPEAKER_01
I just have to tell our old faithful listeners and our young faithful listeners and... Middle-aged.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, middle-aged friends.
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SPEAKER_01
My microphone s not working, so that s why my audio might be a little weird.
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SPEAKER_01
I am in the Windy City.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh.
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SPEAKER_02
I can hear it, too.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, my mic s not working because I m in a windstorm.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh, no!
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SPEAKER_01
Imagine... Imagine we re walking around, having a nice time-time.
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SPEAKER_01
A nice time-time.
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SPEAKER_01
A nice time-time.
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SPEAKER_01
A nice time-time.
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SPEAKER_01
And a gust of wind picks me up and takes me away.
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SPEAKER_01
I d be so upset.
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SPEAKER_01
Would you try to find me?
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Yes.
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SPEAKER_02
No.
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SPEAKER_02
No one would believe you.
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SPEAKER_02
I d be like, I m just going to keep going about my day.
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SPEAKER_02
That was weird.
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SPEAKER_01
No one would believe you.
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SPEAKER_02
Well, someone would eventually.
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SPEAKER_01
No.
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SPEAKER_01
They would be like, you are trying to tell us that your friend got picked up in a windstorm.
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SPEAKER_01
And then you d be like, yeah, and she s fat.
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SPEAKER_01
And they d be like, no way.
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SPEAKER_02
I d be like, have you seen Wizard of Oz?
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SPEAKER_02
It was like that.
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SPEAKER_01
But there s nobody fat in The Wizard of Oz, so it s more plausible.
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SPEAKER_02
There s cows.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh.
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SPEAKER_01
Are you calling me a cow?
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SPEAKER_02
No, I m not calling you a cow.
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SPEAKER_01
You just said... This really flipped.
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SPEAKER_01
You were trying to think...
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SPEAKER_01
I cannot believe you are sitting in California calling me your best good friend of fucking cow.
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SPEAKER_02
I didn t call you a cow, you just said there s no fat people in Wizard of Oz and I was trying to find an example.
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SPEAKER_01
You recently sent me a video of a cow that comes inside a house.
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SPEAKER_01
Was that another, were you trying to get at me another dig?
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SPEAKER_01
No!
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SPEAKER_01
You re like, Nicole, you can come inside.
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SPEAKER_01
No!
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No!
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SPEAKER_02
I was just like, you like cows.
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SPEAKER_02
Look at this cow in the house.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, you like cows because I m a big old cow.
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SPEAKER_01
Wow, Sashir.
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SPEAKER_01
No!
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SPEAKER_01
Sashir.
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SPEAKER_01
No!
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SPEAKER_01
Don t cancel me, bro.
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SPEAKER_01
You re canceled.
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SPEAKER_01
I m in Chicago seeing my grandpa.
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SPEAKER_01
I m already getting enough of being called a cow.
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SPEAKER_01
I don t need it from my friend in California.
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SPEAKER_02
I m not calling you a cow.
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SPEAKER_02
I m just saying.
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SPEAKER_01
Seems like you did twice today.
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SPEAKER_02
Fine, I won t tell anyone you got swept away by wind.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, you re just going to let me go missing?
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SPEAKER_01
I don t know how to win!
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SPEAKER_02
What do you want to hear?
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SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
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SPEAKER_01
That s really funny.
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SPEAKER_01
Sometimes in therapy, my therapist will go, so you don t want anyone to win because
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SPEAKER_01
I ll tell her things. 
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SPEAKER_01
And I ll be like, yeah, but this, and like, but this, and I m mad.
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SPEAKER_01
And she s like, well, you gotta let one of those things go, otherwise nobody in this situation wins.
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SPEAKER_01
And I m like, oh, why are you so smart?
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
Wait, so Shira, what were you trying to say before I went on a wild tangent where I accused you of being sizist?
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SPEAKER_02
I have no idea.
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SPEAKER_02
Whatever it was, it wasn t where we went.
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SPEAKER_02
Trying to desperately avoid where we got to.
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SPEAKER_02
Come on, just try.
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SPEAKER_02
Think about it.
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SPEAKER_02
Oh, actually, I think I was going to bring up, it was a woman on Britain s Got Talent.
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SPEAKER_02
And she was doing all these sound effects, the wind, the wind in the microphone, that made me think of this woman who does all these sound effects with her mouth.
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SPEAKER_02
And like, there s like, nature footage in the background.
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SPEAKER_02
And she was doing like, all the sounds of the animals and like, she s like,
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SPEAKER_02
And it was really good.
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SPEAKER_02
And everyone was like, oh, my God.
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SPEAKER_02
And she was even doing like the... Like the vague desert music that you hear in nature shows.
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SPEAKER_02
And I was like, that is so impressive.
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SPEAKER_02
But what do you do with that skill?
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SPEAKER_02
Fully artist.
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SPEAKER_02
But do they still have those?
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Yeah.
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SPEAKER_02
Oh.
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SPEAKER_01
You don t, you don t, wow.
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SPEAKER_01
I guess you don t value the whole crew who makes a movie.
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SPEAKER_01
So you don t sit through the credits to see Susan, the makeup artist, or Jerry, the rigger.
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SPEAKER_01
Like you re, you re just not there for supporting them.
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SPEAKER_01
Wow.
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SPEAKER_01
Sizeist and unsupportive of workers.
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SPEAKER_02
I guess I haven t watched the credits long enough to get to Foley Artist.
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SPEAKER_01
Well, um, I think it was when I was watching The Beekeeper, we, like, stayed for the credits because my uncle loved it so much.
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SPEAKER_01
And, um, I just, like, clocked that there was, like, a Foley Artist on it.
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SPEAKER_01
Um... Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
At least I think it was The Beekeeper.
0
SPEAKER_01
It might have been something else.
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SPEAKER_01
Marvel has trained me to sit through the credits.
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SPEAKER_01
to see if there s another nugget.
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SPEAKER_01
And I was like, especially the beekeeper, it s like, is there gonna be a hornet s nest?
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SPEAKER_02
Have the bees been kept?
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SPEAKER_02
I need it to die.
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SPEAKER_02
Judith found a video of this woman.
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SPEAKER_02
I can t hear it.
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SPEAKER_01
I can t hear it either.
0
SPEAKER_02
Oh, Jordan had it.
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SPEAKER_02
Oh, but maybe that s why we can t hear it.
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SPEAKER_01
Wow.
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SPEAKER_01
Whoa, you re coming for everyone on this Wednesday.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my god.
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SPEAKER_01
You woke up this Wednesday and chose a violin.
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SPEAKER_01
No.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, you re canceled.
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SPEAKER_01
Oh my God, we gotta get rid of Sasha.
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SPEAKER_02
No, don t X me out.
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SPEAKER_01
Goodbye.
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SPEAKER_01
No.
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SPEAKER_02
Let me see if I can find it.
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SPEAKER_01
I m also wearing my sunflower overalls because I got home from our trip and then did laundry and then put everything just back in the suitcase because it was easy.
0
SPEAKER_01
And I have yet to go out in the world, but I m a little nervous.
0
SPEAKER_01
Because everyone where we were was like, oh, sunflowers, I love it.
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SPEAKER_01
And I m like, will the windy city be bowled over by my flower choice?
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SPEAKER_01
But I feel like people will take fashion...
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SPEAKER_01
Like, do bold fashion choices in Chicago, no?
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SPEAKER_01
Maybe.
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SPEAKER_01
But then I was looking in the mirror today and I was like, oh, maybe since it s like floral overalls, people were like, look at that big baby.
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SPEAKER_01
So I got to talk to her like a baby, like, I like flowers too.
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SPEAKER_03
Oh, you re wearing a big flowers.
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SPEAKER_03
Oh, I like those flowers.
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SPEAKER_03
I like those too, big baby.
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SPEAKER_03
And I m like.
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah, this is the lady.
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SPEAKER_02
This is her.
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SPEAKER_02
Genevieve Cote.
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SPEAKER_01
the way her mouth moves.
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SPEAKER_02
Wait, that was a western?
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SPEAKER_01
I mean, this is tough for me.
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SPEAKER_02
You really, you hyped her up.
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SPEAKER_02
Wait, go to the one with the birds next on this.
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SPEAKER_01
You hyped her up and she s like pew pew!
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SPEAKER_01
Pew pew!
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SPEAKER_01
That was wild.
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SPEAKER_00
We ve explored almost every part of the planet and seen nature in its astounding variety.
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SPEAKER_00
But there s still much to discover.
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SPEAKER_03
That s not her talking, just so you know.
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SPEAKER_03
Is she doing the noise?
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She s doing the noise.
0
SPEAKER_00
Was that her?
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SPEAKER_00
Is that her?
0
I wasn t expecting that.
0
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, she s bloody great.
1
SPEAKER_00
If this lady s married, I m jumping off a roof.
1
SPEAKER_02
But you get it, it s mostly monkeys and birds.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, imagine watching anything on the Discovery Channel with her.
1
SPEAKER_00
She s like, all right, turn down the volume, turn down the volume.
1
SPEAKER_00
And you re like, well, I want to hear what the narrator s saying.
1
SPEAKER_00
And she s like, nah, I ll do it.
1
SPEAKER_00
I ll do it.
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SPEAKER_00
I ll do it for you.
1
SPEAKER_00
She was the weird kid in class, and she s lucky she s as attractive as she is.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because I d be like, man, she s fucking weird, but you know, she s kind of hot.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, I won t roast her today.
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SPEAKER_02
She definitely was the weird kid in class.
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SPEAKER_02
She s like, check what I can do.
1
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, oh god, she s going to make a monkey sound.
1
SPEAKER_00
Here she goes again.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, what do you think she got as a superlative?
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SPEAKER_00
Like, most likely to end up on Britain s Got Talent, making monkey noises?
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SPEAKER_02
I mean, maybe.
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SPEAKER_02
So you see that.
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SPEAKER_02
What do you do with that?
1
SPEAKER_02
Like, say she wins the show.
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SPEAKER_00
What happens after that?
1
SPEAKER_00
Sounds of Africa in Vegas!
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SPEAKER_00
Oh, yes.
1
SPEAKER_02
Actually, yeah, for sure.
1
SPEAKER_02
I can actually see a Vegas show happening.
1
SPEAKER_02
Just a screen of, like, animals, and then she makes the noises.
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SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
Or, like, she has a segment in, like, Cirque du Soleil or something.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, I think there s room for it.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I can see that.
1
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because Vegas is truly where you can have a very weird talent.
1
SPEAKER_00
And they re like, boom, put in a show, charge the people.
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SPEAKER_00
And then everyone s drunk and they re like, yeah, let s see that white lady do sounds of Africa.
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SPEAKER_00
Boy, oh boy.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
So that s cool, you know?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it is.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s really cool.
1
SPEAKER_00
Don t you think?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yes, this year, that was really cool.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m so happy you shared with that.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, me too.
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh my god.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh my god.
1
Is it cold in Chicago or no?
1
SPEAKER_00
Yesterday was pretty warm.
1
SPEAKER_00
Nice.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I was going to go see my grandpa yesterday, but then I had to work, you know, just talking to my computer.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then I was like, I ll take a nap and go see grandpa.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I think my body just needed a day of rest because we went on a trip.
1
SPEAKER_00
I got home for a day, worked that day and then went out that night and then left at 6 a.m.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I think my body was like, bitch, you re getting old.
1
SPEAKER_00
You need to sleep.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, you gotta sleep.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, it s I m not down with this though.
1
SPEAKER_00
Down with what?
1
SPEAKER_00
Like having to sleep and stuff.
1
SPEAKER_00
I used to run on fumes at all times.
1
SPEAKER_00
This is same.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I just I can t do it anymore.
1
SPEAKER_00
I mean, yeah, I used to, when I did Girl Code, would fly to New York on a red-eye, work that day, do shows at night, and then work the whole week, and then get back to L.A., and then work in L.A., and then take a break at some point.
1
SPEAKER_00
But I m needing breaks sooner and sooner, and I m like, one day will I just sleep all day, forever?
1
SPEAKER_00
I guess that s death.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, and that will happen one day, I guess.
1
SPEAKER_00
Which is crazy.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s crazy.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s crazy to think about.
1
SPEAKER_02
Mm-hmm.
1
SPEAKER_00
So let s not tee-hee-hee.
1
SPEAKER_02
Tee-hee-hee.
1
SPEAKER_00
What have you been doing?
1
SPEAKER_00
You re putting together furniture for the outdoors soon?
1
SPEAKER_02
I am putting together furniture for the outdoors soon.
1
SPEAKER_00
It was a really dumb way to phrase it, but where did you end up buying the furniture from?
1
SPEAKER_02
cameras on, but it looks nice.
1
SPEAKER_02
And it s, um, I ll send it to you.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s like wicker.
1
SPEAKER_02
And, uh, I haven t been needing furniture in my yard that does not have cushions because the crows and I guess every other animal hates them.
1
SPEAKER_02
So they attack it.
1
SPEAKER_02
and take the stuffing out and use it to build nets.
1
SPEAKER_02
And then something just tore them up just to do it, like for sport.
1
SPEAKER_02
I was like, God, okay, fine, I ll get rid of them.
1
SPEAKER_02
God, that s so funny.
1
SPEAKER_00
They re like, we don t want anything soft here.
1
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, they really don t.
1
SPEAKER_02
cushionless furniture out there and it looks sturdy and it looks like it could be comfy and I bought some other wicker furniture that s like just the wicker and I hope that ll be good too but it like the stuff I bought from Amazon looks like it has like a lot of pieces so I texted our group chain and I was like does anyone want to come over and help me put this together and Des might come over so that d be great.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s annoying putting together furniture, but it s not worth it to buy expensive outdoor furniture.
1
SPEAKER_00
It ll just get damaged.
1
SPEAKER_00
The elements.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
1
SPEAKER_00
My God.
1
SPEAKER_00
I didn t know you re supposed to bring outdoor furniture inside during inclement weather and when you re not using it.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, wait, what?
1
SPEAKER_00
Who has room?
1
SPEAKER_00
Who has room to store furniture?
1
SPEAKER_00
Also, it s supposed to be outdoor.
1
SPEAKER_00
It s outdoor.
1
SPEAKER_00
This is where it is.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yes.
1
SPEAKER_00
My house is outside and it s not crumbling.
1
SPEAKER_00
Why is this?
1
SPEAKER_00
Why is this club chair crumbling?
1
SPEAKER_02
It s a really good question.
1
SPEAKER_00
Thank you.
1
SPEAKER_00
Make outdoor furniture out of the same stuff we re making houses with.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then make houses out of the same stuff that we re putting in fireplaces that have gas fire, you know, where they have the faux logs that don t go up in flames.
1
SPEAKER_00
Make homes out of that.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then we will be in a perfect circle of non-destructive things for outside.
1
SPEAKER_01
And that is her platform for 2024.
1
SPEAKER_01
Yes, vote for me, Nicole Byer.
1
SPEAKER_01
Everything outside will look nice forever.
1
SPEAKER_02
I mean, it is like curious why I m sure we have had this conversation before.
1
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
1
SPEAKER_02
But like, why are flammable materials still being used to build houses?
1
SPEAKER_02
We absolutely know how to do it differently.
1
SPEAKER_00
Why?
1
SPEAKER_00
Why aren t we?
1
SPEAKER_00
because big house wants you to keep buying houses.
1
SPEAKER_00
So I learned I had a hole in the side of my house and it s now getting fixed and covered up.
1
SPEAKER_00
And two nights ago before I left, an animal was like surprised that there was no longer a hole.
1
SPEAKER_00
I heard a...
1
SPEAKER_00
And then like a... I ve been like scurrying.
1
SPEAKER_00
And then another animal.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, wait, were these animals fucking in that hole?
1
SPEAKER_00
And they were like, wait, we don t have a place to hook up anymore.
1
SPEAKER_00
Because there was definitely two of them.
1
SPEAKER_00
There was definitely scurrying.
1
SPEAKER_00
There was definitely like confusion and like upsetness.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, wow, I think I fucked up this, these animals like hookup spot.
1
SPEAKER_02
Wow.
1
SPEAKER_02
But you know, if what they were doing was like above board, they should be able to fuck wherever they want.
1
SPEAKER_02
Maybe this is an affair and that s why they have to hide in a hole.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh my God, maybe.
1
SPEAKER_02
You re animals, you could fuck anywhere.
1
SPEAKER_02
Why do you have to hide?
1
SPEAKER_00
Why are you going into my hole?
1
SPEAKER_00
What are you hiding?
1
SPEAKER_00
What are you hiding?
1
SPEAKER_00
Who are you hiding from?
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh my God, these nasty little critters.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, well, yeah, they also shouldn t be in your hole.
1
SPEAKER_02
I m glad... I m glad the hole s closed up for business.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I m glad these animals will stop going in my hole.
1
SPEAKER_02
Because it s my hole.
1
SPEAKER_02
It s my hole, and I say who fucks in there.
1
SPEAKER_00
I wonder if the neighbors to the side of me are like, what on earth is she talking about all day long?
1
SPEAKER_00
Talking about, like, animals in her hole?
1
SPEAKER_00
She said that she s running for president.
1
SPEAKER_00
Like, is she close?
1
SPEAKER_02
I m sure they re used to it by now.
1
SPEAKER_00
Well, yeah, I guess it s been two days.
1
SPEAKER_00
They re like, our neighbor s sick.
1
SPEAKER_00
The woman to the right of us is not OK.
1
SPEAKER_00
She s just screaming about weird shit all day.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, you think they can hear you more because of the hole?
1
SPEAKER_00
Oh, I then started talking about how I m in a hotel recording podcasts, days on end talking about weird shit.
1
SPEAKER_02
Oh, in your hotel, the neighbors to your left and right.
1
SPEAKER_00
I see.
1
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, I m really sorry.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, I get it.
1
SPEAKER_00
No, no, but I jumped in a way that like doesn t really make sense.
1
SPEAKER_00
And I m ashamed.
1
SPEAKER_02
You don t have to be ashamed, it s okay.
1
SPEAKER_00
I m stupid and ashamed.
1
SPEAKER_02
Your train of thought was going too fast and I didn t have a chance to jump on, but now I m on board.
1
SPEAKER_02
Thank you.
1
SPEAKER_02
Thank you so much.
1
SPEAKER_00
Lord Jesus.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, it s come back.
2
SPEAKER_01
Okay, I will.
2
SPEAKER_01
What if you were, like, waiting for that?
2
SPEAKER_01
You re like, mm, I m not gonna come back until she says it.
2
SPEAKER_01
Sorry.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, I wouldn t put it past me.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m sick.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then make up weird rules, and then will, like, really adhere to the weird rules I ve made up.
2
SPEAKER_00
I also can t stop thinking about how we went on a trip, and...
2
SPEAKER_00
We were leaving to come home and there was a man who only spoke Spanish who would not sit down.
2
SPEAKER_00
So then we had to go back to the gate and then he didn t seem to get off the plane.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
And it took an hour.
2
SPEAKER_01
I fell asleep and woke up an hour later and we were still at the gate.
2
SPEAKER_01
But I guess the man was still on the plane.
2
SPEAKER_01
And so I have no idea what was accomplished.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know either.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was very, very confusing.
2
SPEAKER_00
I probably told you this.
2
SPEAKER_00
I think I was like flying to Austin or something.
2
SPEAKER_00
This is years and years ago.
2
SPEAKER_00
But like a similar thing happened where I fell asleep and there was like a thing and we had to go back to the gate.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then I woke up with like the ding ding.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, I started to get up and the person next to me was like, we haven t gone anywhere yet.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, oh, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was humiliating.
2
SPEAKER_01
You re like, wow, what a great trip.
2
SPEAKER_01
That was fast.
2
SPEAKER_00
It was so fast, and I feel refreshed.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, he was like walking towards the stewardess and then just, I guess, wanted to get off the plane.
2
SPEAKER_01
Mm-hmm.
2
SPEAKER_01
Which, you know, if that s the case, let him off the plane.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, let him go.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know if they, like, convinced him to stay.
2
SPEAKER_01
I don t know what happened.
2
SPEAKER_00
They re like, please, we need you.
2
SPEAKER_00
Please.
2
SPEAKER_00
We need you on this flight.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, I guess, like, if you get off the plane, oh, maybe he got off through the middle door.
2
SPEAKER_00
But also, I think we got on through the front door.
2
SPEAKER_01
We did get on through the front door.
2
SPEAKER_00
Maybe they took him down some steps or something.
2
SPEAKER_00
But then, I guess, I would assume he got off because it took so long that they had to find his luggage.
2
SPEAKER_00
Because, like, if someone gets off the plane, you re not flying their luggage to the final destination.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, that would actually make a lot of sense as to why we sat for so long.
2
SPEAKER_01
So maybe he did get off.
2
SPEAKER_00
But also, I m like, let me in.
2
SPEAKER_00
Tell me what s going on.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t know why airlines are like, mm, we ll just tell you one day.
2
SPEAKER_00
Give me the goss.
2
SPEAKER_00
What s happening?
2
SPEAKER_00
Give me, give me the tea.
2
SPEAKER_01
Give me the hot goss.
2
SPEAKER_01
But sometimes they give, like, not enough information.
2
SPEAKER_01
I think I said this before, but one time I was on a plane, fell asleep, woke up, we hadn t left.
2
SPEAKER_01
And the pilot was like, sorry about that.
2
SPEAKER_01
We had to deal with the,
2
SPEAKER_01
and an animal bit somebody.
2
SPEAKER_01
And I was like, what animal?
2
SPEAKER_01
If it was a dog, you would have said dog.
2
SPEAKER_00
What animal?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, that is pretty wild.
2
SPEAKER_00
A raccoon?
2
SPEAKER_00
What kind of what kind of animal?
2
SPEAKER_01
A snake?
2
SPEAKER_01
Were there too many snakes in this fucking plane?
2
SPEAKER_00
Oh, no.
2
SPEAKER_00
Imagine.
2
SPEAKER_00
Imagine that movie was based on your flight.
2
SPEAKER_00
You should get residues.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was on I was trying to leave Canada, and this is a United flight.
2
SPEAKER_00
My flight there was delayed.
2
SPEAKER_00
My flight back was delayed.
2
SPEAKER_00
And they were like, oh, so we found upon our inspection that the plane was missing a part.
2
SPEAKER_00
Luckily, we have that part and a manual to figure out how to put that part in.
2
SPEAKER_00
So that might take 15 minutes.
2
SPEAKER_00
or two hours, depending, depending on the speed of replacing this part.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, wait, what?
2
SPEAKER_00
So a part we need to fly is here, an extra one.
2
SPEAKER_00
But it might take 15 minutes to two hours and they have a manual.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, so this part needed to fly.
2
SPEAKER_00
No one is an expert on how to put this on.
2
SPEAKER_00
And we re just going to after two hours say, all right, did it.
2
SPEAKER_00
And we re going to go up.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, call an engineer.
2
SPEAKER_01
Call someone who knows how to work on it.
2
SPEAKER_01
Call anybody!
2
SPEAKER_01
We looked in the globe compartment, we found a manual.
2
SPEAKER_01
We could just figure it out.
2
SPEAKER_01
I ll watch a YouTube video.
2
SPEAKER_00
That s what it felt like.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I ve learned that a lot of people don t know how to fix a lot of things.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like I needed my toilet fixed and the man watched a video on YouTube.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, whoa, what?
2
SPEAKER_00
No, I called a plumber.
2
SPEAKER_00
Who are you?
2
SPEAKER_00
Who are you?
2
SPEAKER_00
Maybe it was his first day.
2
SPEAKER_00
Maybe.
2
SPEAKER_00
But we got to get we need to start going into schools and telling the children, hey, go to plumbing school, learn how to become a plumber or hey, go to flight maintenance school and learn how to maintain these flights as opposed to getting any old body and training on how to do shit.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let s get people specialized in stuff.
2
SPEAKER_00
I feel like we re we re saying we don t need it because it s like whatever.
2
SPEAKER_00
But we need it.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
I actually do want to encourage everyone to go to flight maintenance school because that s 100 percent what we need right now.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, doors are blowing off planes and shit.
2
SPEAKER_00
Get a door specialist on these aircraft.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes.
2
SPEAKER_01
We need more.
2
SPEAKER_00
We do.
2
SPEAKER_00
I probably have said this on this podcast before, but my sister works in a school, and I told her, I was like, I really want to start speaking at schools.
2
SPEAKER_00
And she was like, oh, to tell kids that they can get into comedy?
2
SPEAKER_00
That s really sweet.
2
SPEAKER_00
If you really want to do that,
2
SPEAKER_00
I can like work something out.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was like, no, I want to tell kids to follow their passions.
2
SPEAKER_00
And she s like, oh, that s also really good.
2
SPEAKER_00
I was like, yeah, like, you know, our cousin loves smoking weed.
2
SPEAKER_00
I think he should go to business school, learn how to run a business, fucking like work in a dispensary and learn how to run a dispensary and then open up his own dispensary, because that s what he loves to do.
2
SPEAKER_00
And you can be so high running a business.
2
SPEAKER_00
And at night, when you re not that high, that s when you do the books or in the morning, whenever you re not smoking the weed, unless weed helps you with numbers.
2
SPEAKER_00
And Catherine was like, so you want to come to my school and tell children to, like, become legal drug dealers?
2
SPEAKER_00
And I was like, yes.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yes, I do.
2
SPEAKER_00
And she never she never set it up for me.
2
SPEAKER_01
Well, yeah, I can see that.
2
SPEAKER_00
I mean, it s legal in so many states.
2
SPEAKER_00
Let them run dispensaries.
2
SPEAKER_00
You like water?
2
SPEAKER_00
Start a pool maintenance business.
2
SPEAKER_01
You like sleeping?
2
SPEAKER_01
Start a mattress company.
2
SPEAKER_00
A mattress company.
2
SPEAKER_00
There s so many of them.
2
SPEAKER_00
Open up a mattress firm.
2
SPEAKER_00
They, for whatever reason, still do storefronts, and they seem to last for a very long time.
2
SPEAKER_00
Get you a sleepies.
2
SPEAKER_00
You like grass?
2
SPEAKER_00
Lawn care.
2
SPEAKER_00
Landscaping.
2
SPEAKER_00
Open that shit up.
2
SPEAKER_00
Everybody still needs a landscaper.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
You ain t wrong.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m not, and I really think my voice should be heard in schools.
2
SPEAKER_01
I think so too.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
What else?
2
SPEAKER_00
You like the sun?
2
SPEAKER_00
Fucking study it.
2
SPEAKER_00
Is it coming to kill us?
2
SPEAKER_00
Figure it out.
2
SPEAKER_00
That seems actually pretty hard.
2
SPEAKER_01
Is it coming to kill us?
2
SPEAKER_00
Or maybe solar?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
Solar technology, you know?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
I just think
2
SPEAKER_00
Kids have, I don t know, I think about this a lot, how like, I wish someone had encouraged me to follow my passion with cars.
2
SPEAKER_00
Like, very happy with where I ended up, but like, who s to say I wouldn t, I don t know, maybe if I took one extra step somewhere else, I wouldn t be doing that, and I also wouldn t be doing car stuff, and I d be sad.
2
SPEAKER_01
You know?
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
What kind of car stuff would you have wanted to do?
2
SPEAKER_00
I do like taking things apart and figuring out how they like fit back together.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I would assume like maintenance, like trying to figure out why this keeps breaking on a car.
2
SPEAKER_00
It s like, oh, it s not the transmission.
2
SPEAKER_00
Maybe it s something else or maybe it s something else.
2
SPEAKER_00
And I m not a person who likes like
2
SPEAKER_00
like a fix where you have to come back and fix it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I like a finite thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
So I think I d be a very good mechanic because I m not like, I don t think I d be a person who s like, oh, I ll just like temporarily fix it.
2
SPEAKER_00
So you have to keep coming back.
2
SPEAKER_00
I m like, no, I figured your car out.
2
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then everyone be going to Nicky s to get their cars figured out.
2
SPEAKER_01
That s fun.
2
SPEAKER_01
I mean, you can still do that.
2
SPEAKER_01
You can buy a busted car and learn how to fix it.
2
SPEAKER_00
I thought about that because in order to like, but then that s a lot of stuff I d have to figure out because I can get a shell of a car and then rebuild the whole thing.
2
SPEAKER_00
But then that would be me like watching YouTube videos and like figuring things out.
2
SPEAKER_00
And then what if I m on the highway and the fucking trunk falls out and the engine falls out?
2
SPEAKER_00
And then I m like, oh no, I m a Flintstone.
2
SPEAKER_00
I don t want to be a Flintstone.
2
SPEAKER_01
I also don t want you to be a Flintstone.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but I don t.
2
SPEAKER_01
It s just your feet running on the pavement of the highway.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yeah, and I get pedicures.
2
SPEAKER_00
They re soft.
2
SPEAKER_01
Oh, yeah.
2
SPEAKER_01
In this scenario, you also took your shoes off.
2
SPEAKER_00
Well, no, I figured I d be going so fast that my shoes would just get swept away.
2
SPEAKER_01
Yes, of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
Of course, of course.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh boy, what a tee hee hee.
3
SPEAKER_02
What a tee hee hee.
3
SPEAKER_02
What are your plans for the rest of today?
3
SPEAKER_03
More outdoor stuff.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yes.
3
SPEAKER_03
I spray washed my roof patio this morning because it was dusty and nasty.
3
SPEAKER_02
Wait, do you have a power washer?
3
SPEAKER_03
I have a powerful hose, but it s not like an official power washer, no.
3
SPEAKER_02
There s some man somewhere being like, my hose is powerful.
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t really have a powerful hose.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I ve been looking into trying to figure out like a power washing situation because it s either you pay someone to upkeep the outdoors or you fucking do it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Tis a cheap lady.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I, and it s nice to like do stuff yourself.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I need to figure out a power wash and sitch.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
I mean, I think, I think there s something called a Karcher or like a, yeah, like it s like a spray thing that you could just have and then use it whenever you need.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_02
I ll look into that.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
I was looking into something else and I can t remember.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I need another outdoor broom and catcher.
3
SPEAKER_02
You know, that long thing where you don t have to bend over, but it s made so horrifically that it s hard to empty.
3
SPEAKER_02
Why they make it like that?
3
SPEAKER_02
I don t know.
3
SPEAKER_02
Why did they do that?
3
SPEAKER_02
Why did they do that?
3
SPEAKER_02
Lord Jesus, I need to speak to the person who invented it and say, why did you make it a wiggle wobble?
3
SPEAKER_02
It should just- A wiggle wobble.
3
SPEAKER_02
Because you know the little thing that catches the dust, it wobbles.
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
So you guess like you can hold it straight up, but I m like, let it stay open and I ll just like hold it like a, like a, like, you know- A shovel?
3
SPEAKER_02
Kind of, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then just dump it so it doesn t wiggle wobble.
3
SPEAKER_03
But there are some that do that.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh shit.
3
SPEAKER_03
They re just like open.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, then I gotta, I gotta.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay.
3
SPEAKER_03
I mean, they can bend, but they won t bend like on their own.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, really?
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
With the roof on it?
3
SPEAKER_02
No roof.
3
SPEAKER_02
Open.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, see, I like the roof because the roof keeps things from blowing away when you re taking it to the trash.
3
SPEAKER_03
I see.
3
SPEAKER_03
I see.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
Mm-hmm.
3
SPEAKER_03
Mm-hmm.
3
SPEAKER_03
Are your outdoor lights solar?
3
SPEAKER_02
No, and I think I need to look into solar lights.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, why?
3
SPEAKER_02
Just for cheapening.
3
SPEAKER_02
The cheapening of it.
3
SPEAKER_02
The cheapness.
3
SPEAKER_02
I see.
3
SPEAKER_02
The cheapening.
3
SPEAKER_02
The cheapening.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, I am in the market for solar lights as well in the yard.
3
SPEAKER_03
And I haven t even started my search yet.
3
SPEAKER_02
Well, when you figure it out, let us sister know.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yes, diva.
3
SPEAKER_02
Being being a proprietor of a home, it never ends.
3
SPEAKER_02
It never ends.
3
SPEAKER_02
But it is nice.
3
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I love it.
3
SPEAKER_02
You know, I usually don t hear my neighbors, but sometimes I do.
3
SPEAKER_02
And the summer is coming and the house two doors down.
3
SPEAKER_02
They re just getting older and they throw great parties.
3
SPEAKER_02
Have you been?
3
SPEAKER_02
No, but I can hear them.
3
SPEAKER_03
Well, why don t you go over one day?
3
SPEAKER_02
Because they re literal children.
3
SPEAKER_02
They re like one just got her license.
3
SPEAKER_02
So they got her a little Prius that she has already smashed up.
3
SPEAKER_02
And it s funny because at like midnight, midnight 30, they always play Rihanna.
3
SPEAKER_02
They usually play Found Love in a Hopeless Place.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I ll like go outside and be like, yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
I m like, oh my God.
3
SPEAKER_01
One day we ll taste a beer.
3
SPEAKER_01
Be like, you guys party.
3
SPEAKER_01
What s going on?
3
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_01
You guys, you get into it.
3
SPEAKER_01
Is this a rager?
3
SPEAKER_01
Like, get out of here, old lady.
3
SPEAKER_02
I mean, the teens are cool.
3
SPEAKER_02
They re really cool.
3
SPEAKER_02
It is depressing getting older.
3
SPEAKER_02
But also, it s only depressing when you re like, oh, I feel old and I m doing this old thing right now.
3
SPEAKER_03
For sure.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
It s weird.
3
SPEAKER_03
Should we answer some questions?
3
SPEAKER_02
That is something I have been dying to do.
3
SPEAKER_02
Let s get into it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Let s answer queries, quandaries, and questions.
3
SPEAKER_02
Let s do it.
3
SPEAKER_02
OK.
3
SPEAKER_02
Hello, everyone.
3
SPEAKER_02
Longtime listener, first time caller, which is funny because this is an email.
3
SPEAKER_02
My question is for best friend advice.
3
SPEAKER_02
I ve grown really close with my boyfriend s best friends and I consider them all my friends.
3
SPEAKER_02
I ve gotten to the point where I ll just message them and ask them how they re doing.
3
SPEAKER_02
This isn t an everyday thing, but maybe a once a month check in if I haven t seen them in a while.
3
SPEAKER_02
In the past, men have mistaken my kindness for flirting.
3
SPEAKER_02
Even if I mentioned my boyfriend a thousand times, they ll still
3
SPEAKER_02
Ask for my number.
3
SPEAKER_02
My boyfriend knows this and knows I m just a kind person.
3
SPEAKER_02
However, he gets annoyed when I talk with his friends first about hanging out and then checking with him after the fact to see if he s free.
3
SPEAKER_02
He s completely fine with me checking in with our friends.
3
SPEAKER_02
He thinks he should be asked first.
3
SPEAKER_02
And if he s not free, then I shouldn t go hang with his friends.
3
SPEAKER_03
This is something my mom did with my dad s friends when he wasn t around to have dinner.
3
SPEAKER_03
So I think it s normal to be friends with your partner s friends.
3
SPEAKER_03
However, I know his family history is different and I can understand why he feels how he does.
3
SPEAKER_03
Am I overstepping a boundary?
3
SPEAKER_03
Have you guys ever just hung out with your partner s friends and they aren t there?
3
SPEAKER_03
Have an amazing day slash evening.
3
SPEAKER_02
You are overstepping boundaries because your boyfriend told you what his boundaries are.
3
SPEAKER_02
He said, can you please ask me first before including friends?
3
SPEAKER_02
I have no problem with you including friends.
3
SPEAKER_02
I just would like to, for me, it is care that you ask me first, then ask a friend.
3
SPEAKER_02
So I do think you can respect that.
3
SPEAKER_02
He s not saying it s wrong.
3
SPEAKER_02
And he s like, if I m not free, go hang out with my friends.
3
SPEAKER_02
So yeah, I think just ask that man.
3
SPEAKER_03
I agree with you.
3
SPEAKER_03
Also is because she described her mom said my mom asked my dad s friends to hang out with my dad s not around.
3
SPEAKER_03
Is that the same thing she s doing?
3
SPEAKER_03
Or is she asking her boyfriend s friend to hang out?
3
SPEAKER_03
While the boyfriend s still here?
3
SPEAKER_03
Like, or is it is the boyfriend gone?
3
SPEAKER_03
And that and so she s like, I need to hang out with somebody.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then ask it.
3
SPEAKER_02
It seems as if
3
SPEAKER_02
if you re my partner, I m asking Jordan to hang out and then going, Hey, I asked her to hang out.
3
SPEAKER_02
Do you want to hang out too?
3
SPEAKER_03
Oh, I see.
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_02
And he s like, I m around.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like, why didn t you ask me first?
3
SPEAKER_03
I was sitting next to you while you were texting.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
I think he just really wants to be considered first before you ask friends.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_02
Um, and
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I think your boyfriend s actually very chill and lax and cool, because it s like, if people are always thinking you re single, you re putting out vibes, kind of, I think.
3
SPEAKER_02
I think it might be well-meaning, but like, I mean, I m an idiot.
3
SPEAKER_02
You have to tell me if you re flirting with me.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like some man was like, it s hot that you do this.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then I got on the phone with somebody and I was like, he says it s hot if I do this.
3
SPEAKER_02
Like, what does that mean?
3
SPEAKER_02
And they re like, what?
3
SPEAKER_02
Means he thinks you re fucking hot.
3
SPEAKER_02
And I m like, what?
3
SPEAKER_02
Okay.
3
SPEAKER_02
So like, you re putting out a lot of vibes.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_03
Cause also like, why do you want to hang out with them?
3
SPEAKER_03
Like, I m sure they re great, but you, you have your own friends and then you have your boyfriend.
3
SPEAKER_03
And then I m sure he has friends that are cool to hang out with.
3
SPEAKER_03
But if you re just trying to hang, hit up your friends.
3
SPEAKER_03
Why the reach to go hang out with his friends without him?
3
SPEAKER_03
Or it seems like you want to do it with him.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, ask him first.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, just ask him first.
3
SPEAKER_02
And then have a group hang.
3
SPEAKER_03
That s it.
3
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, but sometimes people pull up to the relationship with no familiars.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that s true.
3
SPEAKER_03
They re like, your your friends are my friends now.
3
SPEAKER_03
And that s all I have.
3
SPEAKER_03
That s it.
3
SPEAKER_03
Sorry about it, baby.
3
SPEAKER_03
Yeah, that s true.
3
SPEAKER_03
But yes, I agree with you.
3
SPEAKER_03
The boyfriend was very chill and reasonable.
3
SPEAKER_03
And instead of boundary, disrespected.
3
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
3
SPEAKER_00
solved.
3
SPEAKER_00
Hi, Nicole.
3
SPEAKER_00
And for sure.
3
SPEAKER_00
Wow, I ve
3
SPEAKER_00
been listening for years, and I ve been wondering what bit of drama to bring to your door, and I think I finally got it.
3
SPEAKER_00
So I would love some of your advice.
3
SPEAKER_00
Basically, I have this friend who turned lover, then turned ex, and now I don t really know what we are or what we re doing, but we were together for maybe like a year and a half, and since we broke up,
3
SPEAKER_00
we haven t been talking on.
3
SPEAKER_00
It s been maybe like...
4
SPEAKER_00
eight or nine months, I think.
4
SPEAKER_00
And in between them we had some brief exchanges, some texts and stuff.
4
SPEAKER_00
We like tried to talk on the phone a couple of times.
4
SPEAKER_00
But I feel like there s still a lot that I haven t said or that I was previously nervous to say.
4
SPEAKER_00
And I think because I have realized that I have sort of an anxious attachment style, they have an avoidant attachment style, it feels very difficult to bring things up.
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SPEAKER_00
And when I do bring up, you know, all the stuff that s still like,
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SPEAKER_00
on my mind, on my chest about our relationship or how things ended, the things that, you know, make me reluctant to jump back into some kind of friendship with them.
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SPEAKER_00
They ll take like a really long time to get back to me, like a week to respond to a text or a voice note or, you know, most recently I asked them like, oh, should we talk about this?
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SPEAKER_00
And they said, oh, yeah, maybe in like a month.
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SPEAKER_00
And I think for me that s especially difficult, but I also just feel like they are deliberately putting a lot of space between us.
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SPEAKER_00
And it s hard to kind of get a straight answer for them that won t exactly just explicitly say like, hey, I don t want to talk about this right now or I m not ready to have this conversation.
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SPEAKER_00
Most recently, I ve been thinking maybe I should just put a lot of space between us, just like make a hard line for myself of maybe just like no contact for a year or something.
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SPEAKER_00
But I m wondering what y all would do in this situation.
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SPEAKER_00
Would you try to find a constructive way to still have this conversation?
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SPEAKER_00
Would you just kind of bow out and let the relationship fizzle?
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SPEAKER_00
I m, yeah, sort of at a loss.
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SPEAKER_00
So I would love some of your wisdom, Stella, really helpful and really good at friendships.
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SPEAKER_00
So I thought I d come to the experts.
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SPEAKER_00
Okay, I think that s about it.
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SPEAKER_00
Bye.
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SPEAKER_02
So, okay, they had a friend turned lover turned ex, and they re trying to talk to them about things that they re avoidant.
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And that s frustrating to them.
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SPEAKER_02
Okay.
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SPEAKER_01
I think it depends on what this person wants.
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SPEAKER_01
Do they want to be friends with that person or do they want to get back together with that person?
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_01
And yeah, I also, it sounds like the caller is, the conversations that they want to have are like kind of rehashing the end of the relationship.
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SPEAKER_01
And it s been like nine months since the end of it, it sounds like.
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SPEAKER_01
Mm-hmm.
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SPEAKER_01
I would be avoidant too.
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Unless it was clear as to like, this talk is in order for us to repair, to get back to a relationship.
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But if there s an agreement or if it s been said or if there s a vibe that like, well, we re just gonna try to be friends, try to be friends.
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SPEAKER_01
Like there s no need to actually keep talking about the end of your relationship if you actually don t intend on getting back together.
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SPEAKER_01
And if you re just looking for closure, that s maybe something this person can t give you.
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SPEAKER_01
Like it s like maybe they can, but also you shouldn t expect it.
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SPEAKER_01
And, you know, you might just need to like be like, well, I actually don t know why it ended like that.
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And that s that.
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SPEAKER_01
Like sometimes you just don t get an answer, which sucks and does not feel good.
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SPEAKER_01
But even if even if the person did actually have a conversation that you want to have, you still may not even be satisfied with the answers they give.
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SPEAKER_01
So it doesn t actually matter.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah, but you have to figure out what you want because, yeah, they might be avoiding you because it s actually a bummer to keep having these conversations.
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SPEAKER_01
If they want to be your friend, they might be like, actually, I would just love to talk about anything else.
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SPEAKER_01
And you keep reminding me of how shitty I was, or like how bad the relationship ended.
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SPEAKER_01
And I don t want to rehash that anymore, because time has passed, almost a year has passed.
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SPEAKER_01
And I would like to move forward or just stop talking.
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SPEAKER_01
And yeah, I think you need clarity within yourself to figure out what you even want from them because I think they re probably confused too.
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah, and I feel like if you re thinking about going no contact, just do it.
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SPEAKER_02
If that s what you need to have some clarity and closure and like get some distance.
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_02
I think I need to know more.
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SPEAKER_02
I need to know like what s being like, why you re rehashing things and what you re trying to get from this.
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SPEAKER_02
Because it does feel like that person has moved on a little bit and it s like,
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah, closure is not something you re entitled to and it s not something you get often.
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SPEAKER_02
You kind of have to do your own closure and be like, this is what happened and that is that.
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SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
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SPEAKER_02
So...
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SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
Hi, Nicole and Sashir.
4
SPEAKER_02
My wife and I, lesbians, listen to your podcast together before we go to bed.
4
SPEAKER_02
And by that, I mostly mean she listens to you very loudly in the shower while I m falling asleep.
4
SPEAKER_02
So you frequent my dreams.
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SPEAKER_02
But we do sometimes exist on the couch together, listening and laughing at you two.
4
SPEAKER_02
I have a friend that I m concerned about, some background.
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SPEAKER_02
She s like Noah from Grand Crew, falls very hard, very fast.
4
SPEAKER_02
She s had many situationships in the past decade, several a year, and very few have lasted longer than three months, but she wants to find the one.
4
SPEAKER_01
She started dating this guy from an app four months ago.
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SPEAKER_01
He lives overseas and a nonstop flight to visit him is over 13 hours.
4
SPEAKER_01
She s madly in love and went to visit him in person for the first time a couple weeks ago.
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SPEAKER_01
They spent the week together and are planning to get engaged later this year after eight months of dating through Zoom and maybe 10 days of being in person together.
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SPEAKER_01
And the plan is that they ll get married and he ll move here in a year.
4
SPEAKER_01
She s meeting with immigration lawyers and is taking a second job to afford the overseas travel and lawyers.
4
SPEAKER_01
I m concerned for her safety, among other things, but I don t know how to tell her.
4
SPEAKER_01
I try to subtly voice my concerns, but she didn t take the hint.
4
SPEAKER_01
What would you suggest?
4
SPEAKER_02
Ooh, baby, that s tough because love is love and love makes people do crazy things.
4
SPEAKER_02
But I would just gently nudge your friend and say, hey,
4
SPEAKER_02
there is actually no financial protection from this.
4
SPEAKER_02
A fiance visa, you are saying when you bring someone over that you are financially responsible for them for like 10 years.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I believe, and honestly, I might be wrong about this.
4
SPEAKER_02
If I am, please write in or in the comments of this episode, let me know.
4
SPEAKER_02
But I believe you are financially responsible for that person for 10 years, whether you remain married or not.
4
SPEAKER_02
So bringing somebody over is like a huge thing.
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SPEAKER_02
And if you are taking a second job in order to afford that, that person can t work until they get a green card.
4
SPEAKER_02
So you are financially responsible for helping them through that.
4
SPEAKER_02
And financial things is like one of the number one stressors in a relationship.
4
SPEAKER_02
So it s like if you are not financially
4
SPEAKER_02
I think it s like talk to her about finances rather than the love and the like safety aspect, because I feel like if you re like, oh, I m worried about you, this doesn t seem like a great choice.
4
SPEAKER_02
Then she s like or they re like, well, you don t think I m making good choices that are like, I think it s like, oh, I m just worried about your finances.
4
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_02
OK, so
4
SPEAKER_02
How long are you financially responsible for someone under a K-1 visa, which is a fiancé visa?
4
SPEAKER_02
The sponsor s financial responsibility usually lasts until the applicant either becomes a U.S.
4
SPEAKER_02
citizen or can be credited with 40 qualifying quarters of work, usually 10 years under the Social Security Act.
4
SPEAKER_02
So, I mean, it is a...
4
SPEAKER_02
It is a hard core dedication to that person.
4
SPEAKER_02
Because you re saying in the eyes of the legal system, you re like, I believe this person is going to be a good contributing member of society and I m vouching for them.
4
SPEAKER_01
Can t someone get a work visa or is that hard to get on your own?
4
SPEAKER_02
I think you have to get a sponsor
4
SPEAKER_02
I think someone is still sponsoring you.
4
SPEAKER_02
And I think you already like to get a work visa.
4
SPEAKER_02
I m pretty sure again, I might be wrong.
4
SPEAKER_02
I think you have to have a job that s taking you to where you re immigrating to.
4
SPEAKER_02
And like, I don t think you can come here, get a job and then get a work visa.
4
SPEAKER_02
But maybe you can.
4
SPEAKER_02
You might be able to actually.
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, but it is, it is like a lot.
4
SPEAKER_02
And then you re tied to this person for a while.
4
SPEAKER_02
It s pretty intense.
4
SPEAKER_02
Um, so that s what I would bring up.
4
SPEAKER_02
Not like the love aspect, like never doubt their love.
4
SPEAKER_02
Be like, I know you re in love, but like legally speaking and financially speaking, this is a huge undertaking.
4
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
4
SPEAKER_01
Cause I was going to say, could this person come here?
4
SPEAKER_01
for six months and they can see what it s like to be together for six months in person and live together and love together and maybe can get a job and then go back when they re not allowed to be here anymore and just at least test it.
5
SPEAKER_00
in person.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
I think that s like a great idea to stay as long as you legally can here.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
Maybe you could suggest that too.
5
SPEAKER_00
Like if you guys are really serious, why doesn t this person just come for a few months and like test the waters?
5
SPEAKER_00
And then if you guys still like each other after that period is done, you know, then find what the best way for this person to stay.
5
SPEAKER_00
But
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, like you were saying, if your friend needs to have two jobs to even get the lawyers, they re going to have to be working even harder to support two people.
5
SPEAKER_01
When they re actually here, because it s expensive to get them here, and then you are a single person household until they can get a green card to get a job.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Yeah.
5
SPEAKER_01
Oh, also, you can be like, why don t they come here for like the six months or however it s like legally feasible for them to come here?
5
SPEAKER_01
Because I really want to get to know them, too.
5
SPEAKER_01
You know, before you guys are married and like all our friends want to get to know them, too.
5
SPEAKER_01
And this is so exciting.
5
SPEAKER_01
I like that.
5
SPEAKER_01
So like, yeah, why don t you like try a trial marriage?
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SPEAKER_01
Like, you know, just like be here because they can t work while they re visiting either.
5
SPEAKER_01
So it would be like what it would be like when they re actually here.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s a good point, yeah.
5
SPEAKER_00
That s a really good point.
5
SPEAKER_01
Also, if they re working two jobs, that person s gonna be lonely that they re bringing over here, and then that s gonna be more of a fight.
5
SPEAKER_01
Tell them to watch 90 Day Fiance, even though it s heavily scripted now and everyone s out of their minds.
5
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, but it ll at least give you an idea.
5
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
5
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
5
SPEAKER_01
Well, I wish them the best of luck, and I d love an update.
5
SPEAKER_00
Mm-hmm.
5
SPEAKER_00
My goodness.
5
SPEAKER_00
Solved.
5
SPEAKER_00
Solved!
5
SPEAKER_00
If you have any questions or queries or concerns, you can email Nicole and Sashir at gmail.com or call or text or leave a voice memo at 424-645-7003.
5
SPEAKER_01
You better believe we also have merch at podswag.com slash best friends.
5
SPEAKER_00
We have transcripts for our new episodes.
5
SPEAKER_00
You can check them out on our show page at earwolf.com.
5
SPEAKER_01
Lastly, don t you dare forget to rate, review and subscribe.
5
SPEAKER_01
That s the easiest way to support this show.
5
SPEAKER_00
Wow.
5
SPEAKER_01
Signing off from the windy city of Chicago.
5
SPEAKER_01
Chi-town if you will.
5
SPEAKER_01
Southside till I die.
5
SPEAKER_01
Whoop whoop.
5
SPEAKER_01
Bye bye.
5
SPEAKER_00
Whoop whoop.
5
SPEAKER_00
Bye bye.
5
SPEAKER_00
Whoop whoop.
5
SPEAKER_00
Bye bye.