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Governor Jerry Brown and The Little Engine That Could

Jan 24th, 2013 | Posted by

Governor Jerry Brown delivered his 11th State of the State address today in Sacramento, and it must have been his most triumphal speech yet. Brown’s first two terms as governor saw the state swing from crisis to crisis and had many asking if the California Dream was dead. Here in his third term, however, Brown has successfully pulled the state from its worst crisis yet. The state is on a very positive track, with a brighter future than probably any other state in the union, and Brown took the occasion to celebrate how “California has confounded its critics.”

Included in that triumph was a strong defense of the high speed rail project. You can see a clip of those remarks below, which includes an extemporaneous discussion of a beloved children’s book that the governor saw as a metaphor for the high speed rail project:

In Brown’s telling, the HSR project is “The Little Engine That Could” – working hard to get over the mountain. And after 30 years of working on the HSR project, it’s now over the mountain with construction beginning on its first segment later this year.

Brown’s Republican critics mocked this and kept pointing out that the HSR project isn’t fully funded – thanks to Republican opposition in Congress. But in California, Republicans are a fringe party that is no longer politically relevant. It’s a Democratic state with a Democratic governor who has his high speed rail triumph. And he’s going to continue fighting hard to get more funding and help get the project on a path to completion.

Significantly, Governor Brown also mentioned that he is beginning a study looking at how California can provide long-term transportation funding. This is an issue that is becoming increasingly important as existing funding sources fail to keep pace with maintenance, and as the demand for passenger rail continues to soar. Over the next two years transportation funding will become a greater issue, and hopefully a good proposal that emphasizes mass transit can make it to the ballot for November 2014.

The relevant section of Brown’s speech is excerpted below.

Transportation and High Speed Rail

In the years following World War II, California embarked on a vast program to build highway, bridges and roads.

Today, California’s highways are asked to accommodate more vehicle traffic than any other state in the nation. Most were constructed before we knew about climate change and the lethal effects of dirty air. We now expect more.

I have directed our Transportation Agency to review thoroughly our current priorities and explore long-term funding options.

Last year, you authorized another big project: High Speed Rail. Yes, it is bold but so is everything else about California.

Electrified trains are part of the future. China already has 5000 miles of high speed rail and intends to double that. Spain has 1600 miles and is building more. More than a dozen other countries have their own successful high speed rail systems. Even Morocco is building one.

The first phase will get us from Madera to Bakersfield. Then we will take it through the Tehachapi Mountains to Palmdale, constructing 30 miles of tunnels and bridges. The first rail line through those mountains was built in 1874 and its top speed over the crest is still 24 miles an hour. Then we will build another 33 miles of tunnels and bridges before we get the train to its destination at Union Station in the heart of Los Angeles.

It has taken great perseverance to get us this far. I signed the original high speed rail Authority in 1982—over 30 years ago. In 2013, we will finally break ground and start construction.

  1. joe
    Jan 24th, 2013 at 21:19

    Some lawmakers criticized Brown for over-simplifying his push for high-speed rail by evoking “The Little Engine That Could.”

    “That’s a children’s story, not a business plan or governing principle,” said Assemblyman Don Wagner, R-Irvine. “We need real solutions to California’s transportation issues, not really fast 19th-century technology.”

    A zinger and capitulation all in one pity comment.

    Drunk Engineer Reply:

    “19th-century” is a fair characterization, now that the project has been given over to Amtrak.

    joe Reply:

    Now that’s what we call a barb.

    Meanwhile Europe’s finest transportation professionals

    Amsterdam-to-Brussels high-speed rail halted

    It was supposed to be the perfect 21st-century link between two bustling European capitals. Instead, the new high-speed Fyra line connecting Amsterdam and Brussels turned into the missing link.

    One month after the maiden trip, the Italian-built trains have been taken out of service.

    Technical problems dogged the sleek new trains — which can go 155 mph — almost since the day they came into service Dec. 9. That has repeatedly caused delays between the Dutch and Belgian capitals instead of slashing more than an hour off the regular service the Fyra trains replaced.

    Now the Belgian state rail company NMBS has suspended its contract for three trains and given Italy’s AnsaldoBreda three months to make repairs or face legal action.

    The problems have touched a nerve in Belgium, where railroads are a source of national pride. Belgium ran the first train on the European continent in 1835.

    I blame Amtrak and PB.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    AnsaldoBreda is shit. Everyone knows this except perhaps the immediate family members of AnsaldoBreda’s top management.

    And Dutch infrastructure costs are some of the worst outside the Anglosphere. Those people spend $50 million a kilometer on HSR in flat land, and sink $400 million a kilometer (a factor-of-2 cost overrun) into a subway.

    Joey Reply:

    They actually get useful infrastructure out of it though.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    So does the US. Second Avenue Subway, DTX, electrified Caltrain, CAHSR ICS, etc.

    Joey Reply:

    Yes but there’s also a reason why many of those projects have been pushed back in favor of BART to SFO/Silicon Valley etc (i.e. less useful infrastructure).

    Jonathan Reply:

    Alon, you should give us warnings! Do remember that “Caltrain Electrification” includes “CBOSS”.

    Joey: yes, MTC politics, and funding formuale. Right?

    Joey Reply:

    I don’t pretent do be knowledgable enough to know the causes of all of these things, but I haven’t seen anything good come out of MTC planning.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    CBOSS is a separate contract from the electrification, though – they get bundled together, but each can be done without the other, and Caltrain just happens to want both.

    Jonathan Reply:

    No, Alon. Caltrain’s current signalling won’t work reliably after electrification.
    (As best I understand it, they still have some “quaint” non-CTC track circuits)

    Richard Mlynarik Reply:

    Excellent engineering analysis there, “Jonathan”.

    So … in order to replace a few “quaint” track circuits (and remembering that 100% resignalling of a trivial little shuttle line like Caltrain’s, completely with new control and dispatching as well as in-cab systems. would cost at mostf $75m anywhere else on the planet) … the solution is to thrwo $250 million (and counting) at Bob Doty’s very very very very very very very very very very special consultant and contractor friends.

    Sounds like a deal. You clearly have a bright career as an American Transportation Planning Professionalism ahead of you. Go out there and score some moolah!

    Nathanael Reply:

    Alon: be fair. Ansaldo’s signalling has a perfectly good reputation. It’s Breda’s vehicles which have a terrible reputation. (I have no idea why Ansaldo agreed to merge with Breda. CEO-think.)

    Max Wyss Reply:

    AnsaldoBreda and Ansaldo STS are both parts of Finmeccanica, a leading heavy industry conglomerate in Italy, which grew a lot by acquisition. The product range is about as broad as the one of Westinghouse or GE in the US.

    AnsaldoBreda and Ansaldo STS are totally independent, and must not be mixed up.

    Ansaldo STS is a well-recognized leading manufacturer of signalling systems, IMHO in the same league as the signalling divisions of Siemens or Alstom.

    As we have seen, AnsaldoBreda is a different story. Their apparent business model is successful as long as the tenders are set up that price can beat quality and technical merit.

    About the Fyra issues, there seems to be in addition some issues with ice building under the vehicles, which are known, and operators should know how to handle it; in fact under certain circumstances, speed restrictions are instated (160 km/h instead of 250 km/h or so), because flying ice blocks can be really dangerous.

    Nick uk Reply:

    To say that the Netherlands is flat is mostly accurate but there are also many canals and motorways to cross as well as one or two rivers ! Due to environmental concerns there is also much tunnelling that was not required for engineering reasons such as the I believe 30 Kms green heart tunnel. In this regard there are parallels with the uk hs2 hsr the northern route of which is to be announced I believe next Monday 28th jan. the outcome of the judicial review into the London to Birmingham section has however not yet been made public by the court.

    joe Reply:

    “As we have seen, AnsaldoBreda is a different story. Their apparent business model is successful as long as the tenders are set up that price can beat quality and technical merit.”

    Remember the critics’ motto for CAHSR: Doable at 1/3 the price and ten times as nice.

    We are on path for the AnsaidoBereda business model.

    Matthew F. Reply:

    Promises like “1/3 the price and ten times as nice” are so much easier to make when you’re an armchair engineer than when you actually have to coalesce political will and put out bids for contract, aren’t they?

    Richard Mlynarik Reply:

    Paying proven serial fraudsters and technical incompetents with an extensive record of failure and of gaming government contract terms is exactly the PBQD=CHSRA model.

    Nick uk Reply:

    The Dutch problem is a train not infrastructure problem as this was ready well before the trains were !
    It is also worth noting that the true high speed Thales tgv sets have been up and running on Hsl zuid for some time now.

    Richard Mlynarik Reply:

    HSL-Zuid (the infrastructure itself) was years late and massively over an astronomical budget.

    More Anglo-sphere than mitteleuropäische, as was the freight Betuweroute.

    The AnsaldoBreda trains (a comparatively small budget item, if a significant service delay cause) just make it look good in comparison.

    VBobier Reply:

    Automobiles were invented in the 19th Century and in Europe too….

    Joseph E Reply:

    Heck, even the airplane is basically late 19th century tech (1880-90’s), just like electric traction, bicycles, automobiles, the telephone, etc etc.

    There weren’t many changes between 1900 and the Wright Brother’s first flight in 1903; I’m sure they could have done it in 1899 if they had gotten started a few years earlier.

    The 20th century has mainly been refining mechanical technologies invented in the 1800’s, except for electronics

    synonymouse Reply:

    and nuclear fission and fusion

    Nathanael Reply:

    Barely. The principles were discovered in the 19th century and the details were worked out in the ’40s.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    Mass-energy equivalence is early-20th century.

    Nathanael Reply:

    In addition to the developments in electronics (which are actually stalling out, though there’s some things which will revive them which I have inside information on), the *current* area of massive technology development is biotechnology — genetic engineering is only the start.

    This is not going to affect transportation, though.

    Jonathan Reply:

    “stalling out”? ROTFL

    joe Reply:

    If you follow wikipedia, Automobiles are 18th century invention.
    Electric cars are late 19th century.
    Today’s batteries are refinements of 150 year old technologies.

    Attacking HSR for being 19th century is essentially capitulation – that’s good for a Fox News zinger.

    synonymouse Reply:

    They have to give the project over to Amtrak, as PB-CHSRA is in way over their head. The fact that an on-the-ropes burg like Palmdale has commandeered the entire project indicates how far it has stumbled off into the wilderness.

    They have to federalize the operating losses, to quash calls for privatization. Private interests would demand changes. Funny thing is that the Amtrak honchos might end up doing the same. Be careful what you wish for. Amtrak will have to find the money to maintain those forlorn stilts in the Tehachapis that only generate more red ink.

    Where’s the NdeM?

    Paul Dyson Reply:

    @ syn: takes you a long time for things to sink in…..Amtrak cannot take over this intrastate less than 750 mile route under present legislation, it has to be state funded.

    synonymouse Reply:

    Of course, they can. It is called changing laws – nothing to it. You have to give LaHood something to do.

    Conrail comes – Conrail goes. Legislators legislate according to the trend du jour.

    Where’s the NdeM?

    Nathanael Reply:

    We have one political party (the Republicans) intent on preventing Congress from doing anything except tax breaks for rich people and foreign wars. We have another political party (the Democrats) which is quite happy to let the Republicans run things even when the Republicans in the minority, as Harry Reid proved this week by retaining the filibuster.

    Therefore Congress ain’t gonna be changing any laws.

    synonymouse Reply:

    Au contraire, mon vieux.

    A snap – change a digit and slip in amongst some earmarks for Hollywood. No brainer – that’s what the crones are for.

    Travis D Reply:

    I take it we are supposed to build a state-wide Star Trek transporter system then?

    VBobier Reply:

    A “Star Trek transporter system” may violate the laws of physics & it’s doubtful it will ever be more than wishful thinking….

    swing hanger Reply:

    Anybody utters that tired line “railways are 19th century tech” might as well put on a “I’m a fucking moron” t-shirt.

    synonymouse Reply:

    You will have to pay Ed Lee royalties for that t-shirt motto, as SF Muni trademarked what it lives.

    VBobier Reply:

    And We have a winner, Syno showed up.

    Nick uk Reply:

    Like a wet t shirt but not as interesting lol

    Nick uk Reply:

    Railways are 19th century tech but hsr is definitely mid to late 20 century limited (sorry couldn’t resist)! And very 21st century by the number of hs lines added since 1999.

    Hopefully by the mid 2020’s to 2030’s California and the uk will have added to this total. And we might see some miles in australia hopefully also. i am not very optimistic about canada though as they cant even get any electrified main lines built despite huge amounts of cheap and mostly co 2 free electricity

    Those opposed to hsr are the ones still clinging to the last century IMHO.

    Robert Cruickshank Reply:

    I will make two predictions:

    1. A Democrat will represent Don Wagner’s Assembly district by 2023.
    2. Don Wagner’s constituents will flock to the bullet trains once they are available.

    As to his ignorant “19th century technology” quip, what else do you expect from a fringe political party?

    Loren Petrich Reply:

    “We need real solutions to California’s transportation issues, not really fast 19th-century technology.”

    I would not be surprised if he travels everywhere in his wheelchair, because walking is old and therefore undignified technology. It’s older than our species, and judging from when vertebrate walking limbs evolved, MUCH older — about 400 million years old.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    Indeed, why walk when you have a car? If you can walk to the house next door, it means your living arrangements are too cramped, and/or there are sidewalks for criminals.

  2. Donk
    Jan 25th, 2013 at 09:27

    Why did Jerry Brown have to bring up the Little Engine the Could and open the project up to even more ridicule? This is like Mitt Romney bringing up Big Bird.

    synonymouse Reply:

    Moonbeam is well into his second childhood.

    VBobier Reply:

    It’s apt, sure some won’t like it, but it works, so I’m not knocking it, unlike a few “Squares”.

    joe Reply:

    Romney’s Big Bird reference summarized for the voting public a widely unpopular cut in funding for a very popular Children’s TV show its signature character.

    Brown’s reference brought attention to the HSR project and the fact it’s been in the works for decades.

    He is clever enough to say something that gets the public thinking about HSR that fits in the his lean budget and reminds CA it’s not a new concept and is long overdue.

    John Burrows Reply:

    When it comes to California High Speed Rail, and for that matter all of California, Republican Doctrine has it that the sky is going to fall in. In other words they have a “Chicken Little” complex about our state.

    The sky here is not going to fall in anytime soon—In fact over the next few years California could do very well indeed. So well that if the Republicans really tank in 2014, Obama might want to have a discussion with Jerry Brown about the fine points of one party rule.

    The fact that California is not, in the words of Peggy Noonan, “going down” is a difficult concept for most Republicans to handle. The story of the Little Engine that Could will be easier for them to understand.

    Robert Cruickshank Reply:

    Who’s going to ridicule it? A fringe political party? Nobody cares what they think any more.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    Yeah, that’s the flip side of one-party rule. A ruling party without serious opposition (and the GOP isn’t serious) has no incentives to govern well.

    synonymouse Reply:

    In time tho one-party rule becomes a parody of itself and indeed the butt of ridicule, a caricature, an easy imitation. Like John Wayne or Jack Nicholson in old age. Or like the PRI in Mexico. Moonbeam is getting there.

    With a monopoly on power in effect Lord Acton’s axiom will always kick in. Government by machine just becomes another variant of organized crime, albeit of the more white collar variety. Just fire or blackball those who do not go along with the program – no need to have them whacked.

    Most people will just go along and join up for the money and the protection. That’s why you cannot get rid of the Camorra or the Mafia. They’re part of the government.

  3. datacruncher
    Jan 25th, 2013 at 10:31

    The Hanford City Council voted Tuesday not to support the Hanford East nor the Hanford West alignments.

    Interestingly, the city staff report to the council says CHSRA staff will recommend Hanford West at the Feb 14 Authority Board meeting.
    That conflicts with statements by Hanford’s City Manager who said he thought Hanford East would be the recommendation. Hanford East would place a station near recent development proposed for Hanford (such as a Costco and other retail) as well as closer to the Visalia/Tulare area.

    JJJ Reply:

    Maybe its time they demand Hanford central….and a stop

    synonymouse Reply:

    Boonies Area Rapid Transit

    James in PA Reply:

    syn sometimes you are a broken record, record, record, record, CHHHHHHht

    synonymouse Reply:

    like “temporary” taxes, “police” operations in far-off, godforsaken countries, PB ridership projections.

    nobody_important Reply:

    He’s obviously has aspergers. I’m not trying to be offensive but it’s very clear.

    synonymouse Reply:

    I thought the shrinks officially pulled that diagnosis from the “index”?

    nobody_important Reply:

    No you’re thinking of something else.

    Peter Reply:

    No, it actually has been removed and been subsumed into “autism spectrum disorder”.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    When the DSM removes gender dysphoria from the list of disorders, I’ll take what it says seriously.

    Peter Reply:

    Good point. I was unaware they still saw that as a disorder.

    adirondacker12800 Reply:

    Gender dysphoria is moderately neutral what do you suggest calling it?
    Removing it from the DSM implies that there are no people who have difficulties living with the plumbing they have. I imagine it would be rather disconcerting to have inappropriate plumbing.
    Gotta call it something, describe the symptoms and have protocols to deal with the problems it causes. And before things get sliced off never to be reattached you want to make sure you have identified that there is a problem that can be solved by slicing things off and not some other problem. The pharmacist is going to have a question or two. The surgeon is going to want to see paperwork before taking out scalpels. So is the insurance company. If it’s not in the manual there can’t be billing codes.

    Alon Levy Reply:

    I’d believe that if the DSM 5 draft didn’t also say that people who are transgender or cross-dress are liars: “Such patients are not reliable historians, and they are typically not candid about their sexual urges and fantasies. The criteria have therefore been modified to lessen the dependence of diagnosis on patients’ self-reports regarding urges and fantasies.”

    No different from how DSM 1 viewed homosexuality as a disorder.

    adirondacker12800 Reply:

    That’s an argument for changing the entry not removing it.
    There are going to be people who are very distressed by they plumbing. What do you suggest we call them?

    Alon Levy Reply:

    They don’t mind the term “gender dysphoria”; they mind calling it a disorder. Recall that with homosexuality, DSM 1 said it was a disorder, DSM 2 said it was a disorder if the patient felt bad about it (which many GLB people do), DSM 3 dropped it, and DSM 4 now classifies homophobia as a disorder.

    Matthew F. Reply:

    I sure wish we could up/downvote things like on Reddit…

    VBobier Reply:

    Syno, You wouldn’t know Boonies from a hole in the ground….

    synonymouse Reply:

    “Boonies” don’t get “a hole in the ground”. Boondocks Area Rapid Transit is all on de rigueur hollow-core.

    Joey Reply:

    Have a look at the geometry sometime. There’s no way you’re getting an alignment suitable for express trains through downtown Hanford (even if that were a good idea). The only way to get a downtown station would be to reroute BNSF along the east or west bypass along with express trains and use the existing BNSF alignment through town for stopping trains only. The marginal cost of rerouting the freight tracks along an alignment that’s going to be built anyway is probably small, but the cost of refitting the existing route for HSR (even if the trains wouldn’t be going very fast) would be somewhat larger. And I have no idea whether BNSF would go for it or not.

    Nathanael Reply:

    I have looked at it on Google maps, and there is potentially room for an express alignment through downtown Hanford, if Hanford really really wanted it. However, the Hanford City Council *already rejected that* because it would involve closing roads, removing and relocating some buildings, etc.

    So Hanford has rejected all the options. This is because the Hanford City Council is stupid. This means Hanford gets no choice and the CHSRA gets to pick without paying any attention to Hanford. In contrast, if Hanford had preferred one choice over another, it might have gotten it.

    Hanford East is better because it’s closer to Visalia, which actually wants rail service.

    Joey Reply:

    Okay, how would you negotiate the curves between 7th and Lacey and north of Grangeville. Recall that at full speed, we need a curve radius of several kilometers.

    Elizabeth Reply:

    by wiping out a lot of downtown, which is why Hanford doesn’t want it

    Peter Baldo Reply:

    The best alternative for Visalia at this point is to double-track the UP route, and operate a local service, at reduced speed, between Fresno and Bakersfield. I suppose the trains could still originate and terminate at SF and LA, and operate on the main system at full speed. The UP will have its price, of course, which I’d put at $1 Billion, if Illinois sets any precedent. Still, a statewide system that leaves out Visalia is no statewide system, and there’s little point in even stopping in Lemoore. Might as well fly through Lemoore at 200 mph and be done with it.

    Peter Reply:

    What about Santa Cruz? A statewide system that leaves out Santa Cruz is no statewide system, and there’s little point in even stopping in Gilroy. Might as well fly through Gilroy at 200 mph and be done with it.

    Matthew F. Reply:

    You really think it would be possible to run tracks to Santa Cruz that aren’t prohibitively expensive, slow, or both? Without upsetting the anti-development attitudes that seem to permeate Santa Cruz politics?

    Gilroy is for better or worse the only realistic place for the statewide system to connect to the Monterey Bay cities. But I’m sure a shuttle bus will spring into existence, or maybe even a light rail if the political will exists.

    Peter Reply:

    Dude, it was sarcasm; basically calling out Peter Baldo’s last two sentences as pure hyperbole.

    jimsf Reply:

    The freeway from Visalia to Hanford and Lemore has been recently completed and cuts the travel time from Visalia significantly, by about 10 minutes ( I drive this often) So while an east side station would be best, a west side station is only 15 minutes from Visalia (20 from downtown). So its not the end of the world.

    Roger Christensen Reply:

    Sounds like the stars have aligned around Hanford West. Straighter and four miles shorter we will at least pass through Kings County in less time.

  4. Derek
    Jan 25th, 2013 at 14:27

    Caltrans to unveil draft rail plan that incorporates California’s high-speed project

    The state rail plan will be the first planning document to fully integrate California’s planned high-speed rail system with existing and proposed conventional rail systems… Caltrans will make the draft plan available for public review starting Feb. 8 and will accept public comments online until March 11.

    It should be interesting!

    Paul Dyson Reply:

    Rather sad that the review period is so brief. And all written by consultants who don’t know Chino from Chico.

    joe Reply:

    I propose halting the HSR segment to Chico until this gap in expertise is filled.

    Paul Dyson Reply:

    What about China Lake? No statewide system would be complete until….

    BMF from San Diego Reply:

    Very few people know the difference about those 2 cities. Chico is a beautiful college town. And, the largest urban area in the country not connected to the nations freeway infrastructure.

    Chino is where The character Ryan Atwood came from in the tv drama The OC.

    Cal Poly has a naming problem too. In SoCal, people assume the Pomona campus. In fact CBS and Fox get it wrong every year when listing top 25 college baseball programs, including “Cal Poly Pomona” but, the Pomona campus doesn’t even play D1 baseball.

    There is only one “Cal Poly” and it is in San Luis Obispo. Which is served by the Coast Starlight and is the northern terminus of the LOSSAN corridor. The other campus is “Cal Poly Pomona”, which is a good school too, but not “THE” “Cal Poly”.

    joe Reply:

    Any one who doesn’t know Chico fails. Chico State is legendary. Parteee!

    Alon Levy Reply:

    Not everyone cares much for college baseball. I might as well say that everyone in the Northeast should know about Chelmsford, MA because that’s where Intercon is.

    jimsf Reply:

    With the state integrating hsr into the rail plan ( as it should be) they can rework a comprehensive network including teh regional trains and the thruway bus services. what we get is a lot of flexibility to use the investments that have already been made in the state rail system.
    I have always said this is the best way.
    It should be taken further to allow statewide through ticketing using a single ticketing platform.
    The best routing options for any trip should include all modes.

    A trip from Ukiah to Los Angeles booked on the website should show all the options / fastest and cheapest, as well as departure times.

    Ukiah to Los angeles would show
    1. UKH(thruwaybus) to MTZ(ccjpatrain)to SJC(thruwaybus)to SLO(surflinertrain)toLAX $49coach

    2.UKH(thruwaybus)toMTZ(sjqtrain)toMCD(hsrtrain)to LAX $99coach $129business $189first

    3UKH(thruwaybus)toMTZ(ccjpatrain)to SJC(hsrtrain)to LAX $99 $129business $189first

    and so forth so from a single site passengers can book their preferred routing and pricing.

    joe Reply:

    What’s the significance of the review period duration 2/8 to 3/11?

    “Caltrans will make the draft plan available for public review starting Feb. 8 and will accept public comments online until March 11.”

    Since the HSR route is a few years off, I think not that much. Also, the plan belongs to the State. It can be changed.

  5. synonymouse
    Jan 25th, 2013 at 19:19

    SF Chron supports study of “possible changes to California’s high-speed rail plan”.

    The editorial staff has not thought so far ahead as BART Ring the Bay. For the moment.

    Tony D. Reply:

    No where in that article does it say there will be “study” for possible changes to CHSR (read it again carefully). Sorry to burst your bubble.

    synonymouse Reply:

    But what it does clearly imply is that if demo-ing I-280 requires changes to the CHSRA plan then so be it.

    Eventually they’ll re-discover Ring the Bay.

    StevieB Reply:

    The editorial makes it seem as if the plans calls for not building a station at 4th and King but this is not the case.

    a recent city memo that suggests terminating Interstate 280 before it stretches into those neighborhoods and asking Caltrain to find a new home for its train yard at Fourth and King streets.

    What is suggested is that the north west triangle of land in the yard could be developed if trains were not stored in the area. The memo says that the land would be more valuable if developed as residential instead of commercial and that replacing I-280 with a boulevard would make the area more desirable as residential. The corner area is further complicated because of plans to place the CAHSR spur leading to Transbay in a tunnel bypassing 4th and King there.

    synonymouse Reply:

    The motive behind Lee’s scheme is adding very large amounts of value to the property tax rolls. The most effective means of maximizing this increased value is to free up the most land for redevelopment. Getting rid of rail entirely accomplishes this objective.

    Two salient points:

    The TBT Tunnel is expensive and fraught with technical difficulties and has a long history of defunding. BART-MTC has always opposed it. The proposed Dogpatch tunneling antes up the cost.

    If it is built but shorn of existing station and other storage trackage there will not be much room for a combined Caltrain-CHSRA operation. Caltrain would win out.

    In any event if BART Ring the Bay resurfaces it will have to be shortly. On the other hand this plan has “legs”. It has San Francisco officialdom on board who are willing to tear down a freeway that was built relatively recently and go up against the highway lobby. Hsr via Pacheco may be bottled up in the Capital of Silicon Valley.

    Jonathan Reply:

    adding value to proerty tax rolls??
    now, if we could ust repeal Pro 13… ;)

    Richard Mlynarik Reply:

    Fun fact to know:

    The Caltrain station site in SF is owned by Willie Brown’s very very very very special friends at Catellus.

    Caltrain only has an operating easement, and no rights above the rails.

    Guess who makes out when (as it ought to)?

    (Hint: not the public.)

  6. jimsf
    Jan 26th, 2013 at 10:38
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text:
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Princess Jasmine Doll Cake

This is a cake that I did for a child at the Angels' Arms foster home in St. Louis. Her name is Jasmine and she wanted a Princess Jasmine cake. I have never done a doll cake before so CakeCentral was a big help. What I didn't know is that for these super tall dolls, like the Disney dolls, you need to add an additional 8" round cake at the bottom. I just gave her an extra icing'y bodice to cover her uncovered parts. This was fun!

funbun Says... 7 years ago

She is beautiful!

vjred Says... 7 years ago

oh, she is so cute...beautifully done!

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My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Spirit Didn't Just Move; It Threw Up

You know that neighbor - the one whose house is currently covered in a full Big Lots' worth of blinking lights, inflatable snowmen, plastic nativity scenes, candy cane fence posts, and Santa-hat-wearing flamingos? Yeah, that one.

Turns out, s/he is also in the cake business.

Oh no you don't - no scrolling down just yet! This, my friends, is a cake worth savoring.

Why don't you call a friend over, click on the photo to enlarge it, and then take a few moments to count how many pieces of plastic there are? Next you can debate whether "Christmas" is two different colors to call attention to "Christ" or because someone ran out of red icing. Then, just for funsies, estimate how many bottles of sprinkles were poured on to make that thick crunchy coating.

Frankly, we could be here all day.

Ok, fully savored? Good.

Now, imagine being a business person, and one looking to expand that business. Would you - hypothetically speaking - think the above cake would be an effective marketing tool?

Why do I ask? Uh...well...

I know the mad sprinkle action makes it hard to tell, but that red paper is actually a business card - and of a wedding planner.

Yes, a wedding planner.

Who wants you to hire him.

To plan your wedding.

Is your friend still there? Good. Next time killer: imagine a wedding thematically congruent with that cake. Maybe draw a few pictures. Then send them to me - cuz THIS I gotta see.

To be honest, A. Nony, I'm a little jealous: this would've been a brilliant way for me to send my own holiday greetings out.

- Related Wreckage: Ye Olde Yuletide Ax

UPDATE: Well, I can't say I didn't ask for this. Heheh.

Marian Murdoch (who is a rockin' photographer, btw) cracked me up with the little bridge & Santa/officiator, but the best part is that shocked snowman. You can almost hear him saying, "OMG, Mary? Is that you?!?"

Then we have Fanboy Wife's creation:

Oh yes, it's all there - right down to the bonus-points-scoring red rickrack up the side of the bride's dress. That kind of attention to detail is what really sets you Wreckerators apart!

Another Update: Ok, one more, from 15-year-old Kelsie:

Love the children's choir. ;)

Today's charity, Habitat for Humanity, builds houses for those in need. Donations go towards building materials, and volunteers help partner families build. The homes are sold to these families at no profit, so that the mortgage payments can be used to build still more Habitat houses around the world. Nifty, no?

Click here to donate your dollar via our First Giving Campaign Page, or go the extra mile and help build a house near you.

« Sunday Sweets: The Cutest Christmas Cupcakes | Main | The Final Countdown »

Reader Comments (94)

Oh. My....

Um... is that really sprinkles? Or did those bakers have serious scalp conditions??? Egad. I think I need to walk away for a minute.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Am I the only one that finds it a bit morbid to have the Nativity scene with a giant cross over it? I mean...this was supposedly taking place a long time before the cross became a symbol for Christ, so isn't this sort of like having the Nativity scene with some gallows in the background? If I was Mary I would be thinking, "Wow, really? Someone is getting ready to crucify somebody right next to the stable where I'm having my child. That's classy." Talk about foreshadowing....over a BABY.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJamie

Augh! My eyes! My eyes! Too much to process! Not to mention my stomach hurts just THINKING about all that sugar!

On a more serious note, I'm happy to see Habitat for Humanity featured today. I went on a service project with them my freshman year of college and it was a wonderful experience. :)

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Decoratoritis, anyone??

wv: reveng (what I could expect from my friends if I DARED make a cake like this for their holiday party!!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterryglights

Just saw the book on the Today Show this morning! Cool!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

I agree that the cross hanging over baby Jesus is totally creepy. It's like saying "Hey, welcome to the world kid! By the way, you're going to be tortured to death later, so enjoy your short life while you can!"

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKore

Wow. Don't drink and decorate.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok, gotta looked like someone made the Candy Land game into a cake...just wow.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKat

What's up with the Bridge Over the River Kwai?

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKevin

Bawahahahaha!!!! I so needed this little pick me up today. What a sugar rush I have from all those sprinkles.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Cookie Girl

Wow - were these decorated by the same person? They're almost exactly the same, down to the organization of the plastic flotsam and the positioning of the images! Talk about lack of creativity (and a certain discerning eye for aesthetic!)!!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Nothing like snorking my breakfast eggnog! I think what really threw it over the edge was the plastic ruffle around the bottom.

And a wedding planner....*ROFLMAO* My Big Fat Plastic Wedding anyone?

scerings: My retinas received quite the scerings from the glare of the sprinkles.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Over the river and through the woods. . . to Joseph and Mary's we go!!

The whole thing is just wrong.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKarenlibrarian

Kits. They HAVE to be kits. The random impossibility of two bakers reaching into that bottomless box and pulling out sleigh, bridge, two snowmen, trees and light bulbs for separate cakes is astronomical.

And the face that they MUST BE kits, put together on purpose, piece by piece, for just THIS purpose. . .ohhhh, cruel World.

The worst part is that there are two actual HOUSES tarted up like this, with bridge and kissy-kids a permanent fixture, then all the other geegaws scattered into the mix----that I CAN SEE FROM MY FRONT DOOR!! Right now, blazing away through the snowfall.

My Daddy took one long Southern look at it once, and drawled, "Ain't a THANG left in K-Mart, is there?"

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterracheld

I feel guilty by association for having the same Christmas present labels as shown in the first one. I vow not to use a single piece of plastic flotsam or sprinkle in my holiday baking as expiation for this.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

Holy crap, talk about trying to cover all the bases.

Perhaps there was a sale at the Dollar Tree on the Bag O'Christmas Crap?

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSeverina

So you've seen that house on the corner of my block?

Love your charity links with every post!! YOU ROCK!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterS3XinthePantry

yes, yes. the cross is bothersome to me, in a manger scene.

but the cake, as a whole, is just plain ridiculous. both of 'em.

sometimes, more is not more. in this case, more is grotesque.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

gives a whole new meaning to "winter wonderland"

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I personally love that there are only six reindeer pulling Santa's sleigh. 'Cause adding the other three would make the cake too busy.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeccy

In the second cake, judging by the angle of the hill, I think Santa just cried a river over the cake.

And, yes, that cross over baby Jesus is really morbid LOL

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen in Canada

You know we southerners think Santa is one of the Three Wise Men.

I'm not quite so sure about Frosty the Snowman or the Giant Lightbulbs, since I did sleep through that part of Sunday school.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSeverina

I made the top wreck my desktop background so that I may savour it every day, all day, until Merry ChristMAS day comes around ^___^ bravo!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkaty

All it needs is some "Christmas stars" from Chappy Chanukah...

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGotta Be KD

I counted 21 pieces of plastic on the first "cake". That is if Santa's sleigh and reindeer only count as one.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRebekah

Just thinking about cruching into a piece of this cake makes me gag a little. I need to look away. Ick.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterViewtiful_Justin

Oh, lawsy! I went off to see Yvette's site and about had a fit. My husband had to come in and see what was going on. One of my granddaughters is getting an engagement ring for Christmas, so of course I had to send it to her, too.

Yes, absolutely - that site and those cakes go together.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

I think I just got ADD from those cakes.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfeathergirl

Why is the giant gray cross near the "nativity" next to Dandruff Mountain?

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I counted 20~21 plastic ornaments on the first one...yeah, I stared into that long enough to count.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbunnyqueen

These kinda remind me of those I Spy books for little kids. "I spy a button, some candles, and snow...." hahaha

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

I feel so very sorry for that wedding planner. I bet they dropped off their business card for contact information or so they can spell the company name right. Even better, if they wanted the design to be the inspiration for how they wanted the cake to look. I'd be mortified if I were that business owner.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatjaMouse

What is with the first cake? The cross coming from the little manger shows as upside down! Who exactly was born in the manger? Yikes. I'd be a little scared of this cake in real life... you know: millions of flies coming at the window, black tar in the toilet, people with their head spinning in circles saying all sorts of f bombs about the big J... Nothing says Merry Christmas like an inverted cross I guess

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

More evidence of people's increasing inability to make hard decisions. Can't decide what design to use for the cake? Just throw EVERYTHING on there, including some burned-out light bulbs.

"Ain't a THANG left in K-Mart, is there?"
Racheld, your Daddy's comment made me laugh out loud.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Well, I am offering myself as the exception....I liked them. It looks a lot like the homemade Christmas village we do each year. From the cake wreck perspective I concede that they're wrecks, but so is the Christmas Village. As for the cross, well, its a very good example of foreshadowing, a writer's device, that adds a hint of what is to come. The problem here is that the "shadow" is too prominent. It should be much paler and less well- defined. Ok, I'm ready for the slings and arrows!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMellodee

The upper cake as a skirt. As a final indignity, it has been given a lace skirt. Cakes should not wear skirts.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCindy

Rachel, I think the inverted cross is supposed to be a clever shadow of the manger's beams, with some, ahem, foreshadowing.
But an inverted cross is associated with St. Peter, who didn't deem himself worthy to be crucified in the same manner as Jesus and thus asked to be crucified upside down (which is even more unpleasant), or so the story goes. This cake appears to foreshadow that, too!

Word verification: alitypo - The Happy Hallidays cake from the other day had alitypo, even if it was in icing and not typed.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Um, seriously? Christmas light bulbs? Does the cake light up too? (wouldn't that be SWEET!) or are they just recycling old glass bulbs and sticking them on a wintry scene, like THAT makes sense. They're just mingling among the trees.

Now, what is the logic of a 3D winter scene and a 2D comic strip of carolers and/or the nativity scene? and a sprinkle OUTLINE? sprinkles don't work well for an outline. Is that 3D sleigh lurking on the mysterious mountain going to mount an assault on the unawares 2D characters?

Btw, love the foreshadowing of Christ's death at his birth, with a cross and a creepy shadow cast from it. *shudder* Wreckerator, do you know how long it took me to get my preschoolers to understand that they didn't crucify BABY Jesus? thanks a lot! great way to confuse the issue!

That wedding planner would have been better off with yesterdays xmas balls or penguins promoting seasonings. YAH.

wv: sultale--These cakes are an in-sultale to everything decent about Christmas and cakery!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoanne

@Jamie LOL. very creepy! not to mention the SHADOW of the foreshadowed cross. punny, and creepy!

wv: parri -- fencing term, of course. time to impale the cake with a fencing foil after the flotsam, trees, and lights!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Karenlibrian ROFLMAO Good one!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Unfortunately I have been really busy lately and didn't see the charity suggestion post, but if it hasn't already been mentioned (or even selected!) I'd like to suggest the Alzheimer's Association as a charity for people to consider.

As someone who lost his grandfather to a long struggle with the disease, it's a cause very near and dear to my heart. I've been participating in Memory Walk fundraisers for the last 5 years to help raise money for research.

If anyone is interested in more information about the Alzheimer's Association and how you can help, their website is:

If you'd like to find a Memory Walk in your area, go to this address:

Also, lastly, if you feel the urge to donate, here is my personal donation page for this year's walk:

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTerry

I think you and I both know what kind of wedding that planner creates - streamers, balloon arches, plastic flowers, paper bells, confetti sprinkles on the tables. Redneck-tastic!

WV: hayedl - The bales used for seats at the reception hayedl over the place.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCyndi

Everybody now: Dashing through the NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

wv: thene
A Nativity thene to offend every one.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWATERBABY CHRISTINE

LOL @ EVERYONE today! And yes Anon @ 10:42. That winter wonderland makes me wonder...cross, bulbs and all.

And if this is a kit, what happens in the lower right half of the cake is up to the artist, er, wreckerator I presume. I wonder if the hill is part of the kit....

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I really like the subtle white tulle ruffles UNDER the cake too. Because it needed a little embellishment.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHappy Campers

Oh my. Does anyone else see that golden stream of "sprinkles" around the nativity scene? Reminds me of yellow snow...

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Please, please, PLEASE tell me that those weren't glass ornaments and light bulbs on those cakes!!!!That kind of crunchy is definitely a no-no!

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterYarn Princess

Oh. Oh my. I'm a wedding planner and I just had the BEST idea about how to drum up some more business for the 2010 season...

Everyone, expect to see my frosting coated card at your engagement party! I'll make sure the lettering matches the icing

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterACBatz

There's ornaments with those bulbs, too. And "giant" snowman eating poinsettias among the trees. And powdered sugar"snow" over everything. dimming those bulbs! oh yeah, they don't light.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

my eyes are bleeding.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJust Me,Pilgrim

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My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Cakes For a Crowd

Okay, I get it. I know we're in a recession. I know we're all cutting corners to save some cash. I know we're all trying to shave precious minutes off our day so we can get home in time for LOST.

But can we stop sacrificing cake in order to save a few bucks? Can't we give every person his/her own special celebratory confection? (And for the love of Betty Crocker, whose idea was it to have less cake around during a party?)

Maybe it's because celebrating several things at once makes for a great party word-puzzle:

Just to recap: "Congrad Jonathan on 10th Congrad Wendy on 5pm & Happy Birthday IaKeia."
(Coincidentally, last time I celebrated my 10th and 5pm, I was at IKEA.)

Maybe it's because sometimes you need a reason to use up those extra office supplies:

And if you take a bite with a straight pin in it, you get to keep it!
(I guess when they told the bakery to "tack on" a few more names, they took it literally.)

Or maybe it's because busy cakes allow the decorator to hide unsightly monikers amongst a sea of names:

"Happy Birthday! Anica, Yvonne, An..." Whoa, whoa... what's that say??

{{scrubs eyes}}

I really want to crack a joke here, butt I don't want to say something tongue in cheek.
At least they didn't mistake it for art direction. [Rim shot!]

Congrad John M. on 12st, Congrad Lee B. at 9pm and, Laura D. on Happy Birthday Sam's Club!

« Hungry Like a Wolf | Main | Sweet Reading Sweets »

Reader Comments (92)

I work at a grocery store bakery and the things some people want me to cram on a cake, it's laughable. There was one guy who wanted a cake to split between three people's birthdays. He got the smallest cake because he was cheap, had me put a spiderman skit on it (which is bigger then the cake itself BTW) and had me write all three of their full names. I regret never taking a picture of it. It was so ridiculous. lol

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This just makes me glad that when it is my turn for the monthly office birthday party that I don't have to personalize the cakes.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

No-one's commented on the first cake's other wrecky aspect... the "congrad"! Maybe Jonathan came 10th in a big, important competition, and Wendy's just thrilled when 5 p.m. rolls around and she's off for the day? And anybody got a guess what name "Iakeia" could be, assuming it was a person not the store?

With the black icing and the streamers... why not add some post-its to an office cake. They're a key work-related item! Um, yeah.

As for poor Anus... given the spelling of the other names, I suspect this is correct, and it's someone who was named in a different country where the name is perfectly fine. As someone with a name that's unpronouncable to most Anglophones, I can sympathize. Although, if my name was so unfortunate in the language of my chosen country, that's what middle-names, nicknames, or legally changed names are for!!

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

@ Vickie:

I believe that the faded, or "ombre" effect there is intentional--it seems to be the hotular thing at stores in my area.

Why don't we relax and enjoy the fine points of this thing? For example, we can admire the copious use of REAL curling ribbon embedded in the frosting, and the satiny sheen of those roses...looks just like someone licked them, because they're so yummy.

Then there is the diligent use metal staples to hold the name tags on (so as not to blow away~~we know how breezy it can get in the bakery dept.)

Finally, we can appreciate the work that went into the fine script on those whose names WEREN'T important. There. Don't you feel better now?

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I can't decide if it's worse to have wrecked someone's name into Anus, or that it was supposed to read "Anns" for the multiple Anns in the office. Not only do the Anns have to share their birthday cake with the other birthdayers, they don't even get noted individually! Yeesh. Maybe our office policy of ignoring all birthdays, anniversaries, etc. isn't so bad after all.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Anus? Was he so named because he was born with an enematic smile?

Have we now scraped the bottom of the barrel and reached the very end of the cake wreck humour?

Or will there be more bringing up the rear?

(at least there's no problem wigh where to stick the candles!)

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Poor Anna.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Gotta love the laziness of the Post It notes and stick pins!

You should do a post for Sunday Sweets on LOST themed cakes! Happy Losting! Mmm...sounds like frosting.. :)

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What happened was , when I went to post my comment, I got a message thingy that said there was some sort of "ERROR." So, I did it over (a bit different 'cause I couldn't remember what I did the first time).
Disregard one or the other...or BOTH!!
Look, I'm REALLY not schizophrenic, here!
Neither am I!

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Ha! LOL, even I get teased about my name so I can only imagine what it's like for An-... Um... Let's just say Angus

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAstrid

I think perhaps that was supposed to be "Angus"... I hope...

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Poor Anus. I also felt sorry for poor old Kank.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

my middle name is ANISE and I have had the misfortune of having this mispelling...and this is why no one calls me by my middle name anymore :)

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

One more possibility on the last one: Anush, which is a male name in India. (It's pronounced ah-Noosh.) Let's not forget that not every name out there is of American origin, and that words or names that have humorous/unfortunate meanings in English do not translate the same way elsewhere. :)

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSmitha

That poor wreckerator! She didn't realize what she wrote until she got to Michael's name & saw what she wrote above! Wonder why she didn't fix it? Maybe she thought no one would notice??
Oops, gotta go. Time to watch last week's LOST episode again. Has anyone made an island smoke monster cake yet? Yummy - lots of black icing!
WV: tints - I'm really tints about how LOST is going to end!

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKay

Wait... seriously... "RIM shot"? Wow!

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercarmiehead

It says Anna. The second 'n' is sloppy, and the 'a' is akward, but it does say Anna.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWinter

Waay back when I first was a teacher, my school had just gotten it's first group of Vietnamese refugees as students. One of my students name was F*ck.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaede

Could it be "Avis"?

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

I love it-I am still hoping that Anus was a misprint

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hilarious! I noticed the Anus as well.

check out my blog:

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter~Nikki~

The pins on cake 2 are actually T-pins, commonly used in workplaces whose office and workstations are actually constructed from fabric panels, a la "Office Space".

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHippie2MARS

What I want to know is, how in the heck, being the ONLY girl out of seven celebratees, did Ginger luck out with the hot pink cake, when the other six were guys? Chin scratcher...

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterC & A

It was a contest on when baby Iakeia would arrive. Jonathan guessed the date and Wendy guesses the time. They won a cake.

May 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterregina in oz

I cannot believe, ok maybe I can, that there is someone out there with the name of Anus.. oh come on wreckerators! I think the person decorating that cake had a bit much to drink and said the heck with it when she/he couldn't read the names to put on the cake. I fear for whoever picked up that cake.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

You know we spend too much time reading Cake Wrecks when it takes til 2:20pm for anyone to mention "Congrads". I guess everyone figured, "Oh, yeah, did that last week. Could have been worse."

By the way, I like the Post-It Notes cake idea. Not the actual paper and T-pins, but I can just see future cakes with little fondant sticky notes and piped pins. A great idea for these multi-celebration cakes.

At an office I managed, we did away with the birthday cake thing entirely. It was just too much trouble to gather donations, order, pick up, etc., as well as even remember that it was someone's birthday. So I instituted "If it's your birthday, you bring the donuts day." Nothing says "Happy Birthday" like a box of Krispy Kreme. Um, donuts.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

I LOVE Cake Wrecks! If I ever need a laugh I can find it here. Thank you!!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLatina

"To take arms against a sea of names, and by opposing, Wreck them"

I too thought it might be Anna. I do feel bad for someone saddled with Anus, though: even if it's pronounced "a noose", it still sounds like "a noose". But I guess morbid is better than gross.

By the way, if you take it as archaic Latin, tori amos can mean "doughnut love"! (Well, sort of.)

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGoueznou

That's what happens when your coworkers think you're an asshole.

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkittenpie

I think Anus actually supposed to say Anna lol

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAngela T.

Our work used to do an individual cake for each person's birthday. We were once a very small company that suddenly grew into a public company. Before they finally switched to group cakes, we were having cake two or three times a week every week. It was insane! As a company we were collectively becoming closer to obesity, heart problems, and type II diabetes.

Now we do cake once a month for all occasions where cake should be celebrated (for the most part). It, as you have shown with this post, has created new issues with celebrating in the work place.

Gaffigan fans: "It's Bill's birthday!"
"I hate that guy."
"There's cake in the conference room!"
"Well, I should say hello."

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcie

I have to agree with C & A. Out of all those wrecks, what I'm wondering about is why the hot pink/flowery cake when only one of the names is female? Silly, I know, but it's bugging me!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMucey

why, oh WHY do I wait to read your blog until nighttime when the house is quiet and everyone is asleep- I laugh waayyy too loudly and nearly wake everyone up! You crack me up!!!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

This post inspired a wreck-tastic dream last night. I was in a bakery and of the four pre-decorated cakes all four of them were wrecks. I was hopping with excitement and borrowed a camera from a total stranger so I could document. Only then did I see the "No Photos" sign and the owner of the establishment peering round with suspicion.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBlue Sarah

To those questioning the pink-to-female ratio: seriously, some of those guys could be gay. You don't know. In fact, all of them could be, for all we know.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ROTFLMAO! I LOVE the last funny...I can't believe some of the mistakes these decorators make.

May 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBabeeLove

Just to let you know that Anus/Anis is an Arabic boy's name.

May 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was wondering about the pink icing on the cake too. I'm thinking it was the cake in the display.

May 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think the name is supposed to be Arius, and they forgot to dot the i. (Maybe?)

June 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

I think the name on the cake was "Anna." It's just that the wreckerater had a huge problem with penmanship and that last A looks like an "s" while the middle n looks like a "u." I know it's a late post, but I thought I might ease someone's mind. : )

October 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I have also encountered the feminine name "Annis", and was momentarily unsure how to pronounce it. Right after the birth of our third child, I overheard with horror (through the curtain drawn around my bed) the name bestowed on the innocent baby girl in the next bed. Hospital employee: "What name do you want on the birth certificate?" Proud Mom: "VaJeanna" Employee: "Um, how do you spell that?" Mom: "V-A-G-I-N-A"!

May 31, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertruthfinder2

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All-American Allen Crabbe Declares for NBA Draft
Courtesy: Cal Athletics
Release:  04/03/2013

April 3, 2013

BERKELEY - California men's basketball junior All-American Allen Crabbe has elected to forego his final year of collegiate eligibility and enter the 2013 NBA Draft.

The Golden Bear painted his name throughout the school's record book while leading California to one of the winningest stretches in more than 50 years. Cal placed in the top four in the Pac-12 Conference and reached the postseason in each of Crabbe's three seasons, totaling 63 wins overall. The Bears advanced to the NCAA Tournament in 2012 and 2013 and defeated UNLV in the second round earlier this spring.

"It has been a dream of mine to play at the next level for a long time and I feel deep down in my heart this is the right decision," Crabbe said. "I have thoroughly enjoyed my time at Cal and learned a lot from my coaches and teammates. I will miss a lot of people at this University both in basketball and in school. I will always be a Golden Bear at heart."

Crabbe, the 2013 Pac-12 Player of the Year by the league's coaches, completed his career 10th in school history in scoring with 1,537 points in 98 career games. His 15.7 career scoring average ranks 12th all-time at Cal. Crabbe is also among the school's all-time leaders in career three-point field goals (third, 209), career free-throw percentage (seventh, .819) and career three-point field goal percentage (T-10th, .382). He was second on the Pac-12's active career three-point field goals list through this past year.

Crabbe was named a National Association of Basketball Coaches (NABC) and Sporting News third-team All-American, earning first-team All-Pac-12 as well as NABC and U.S. Basketball Writers Association (USBWA) All-District laurels this past season. The junior was selected as a candidate for the Naismith National Player of the Year award in February.

A three-time All-Pac-12 selection, Crabbe was a first-team all-league pick each of his last two seasons. He was named the Pac-12 Freshman of the Year in 2011.

"Allen is an exceptional player and even greater person," California head men's basketball coach Mike Montgomery said. "He is very talented with a tremendous work ethic and will represent Cal well at the next level. We are proud of all that Allen has accomplished here at Cal and wish him the best in his professional career."

Crabbe, the conference's regular-season scoring champion this season, posted 607 points, good for seventh-most in a season in school history. He completed the year ranked third in the Pac-12 in scoring average at 18.4 points per game. Crabbe scored 20 or more points in 28 career games, including 15 times this past season. He led the Bears or tied for the team lead in scoring in 17 contests during the 2012-13 campaign. The junior ranked among the league leaders in three-point field goal percentage (fifth, 1.9), free-throw percentage (eighth, .813), defensive rebounds (10th, 5.1) and overall rebounds (18th, 6.1). His 64 three-point field goals tied for fifth on Cal's single-season list. Crabbe has led Cal in scoring overall each of his last two seasons.

Crabbe is the first Golden Bear in Montgomery's first five seasons at Cal to enter the NBA Draft before exhausting his collegiate eligibility. He is the seventh Cal player overall to leave early and the first since Ryan Anderson in 2008, prior to Montgomery's first season in Berkeley. Anderson (2008), Jason Kidd (1994), Lamond Murray (1994), Shareef Abdur-Rahim (1996), Jamal Sampson (2002) and Leon Powe (2006) each left Cal early to enter the NBA Draft. Tony Gonzalez, who played both football and basketball for the Bears, also entered the NFL Draft after his junior season.


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Calories 280 (1170 kJ)
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% Daily Value 1
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Beautiful and metaphorical ‘Tsuritama’ impresses

“Tsuritama” is an animated show about fishing, but from that phrase alone we can infer that the scope of its subject matter will be much larger than that. Fishing, like hunting, has become intertwined with more and more symbolic meanings and romantic associations as fewer and fewer people have to fish in order to live.

Consider Hemingway’s “The Old Man and the Sea,” which if you read it in a high school English class would seem to be about everything except fish. Likewise, in “Tsuritama,” the all-male cast of protagonists actualize themselves and mature into adults by the strength of their rods and sinkers.

What sets “Tsuritama” apart from Hemingway and other works exploring fishing as a metaphor, however, is twofold: it is — for most of its running time — a quieter, less heroic slice-of-life drama, and its other main source of inspiration appears to have been “Men in Black.”

Yes, this is not just a fishing show. Rather, it is a fishing show featuring aliens and the secret agents who surveil and hunt them for the good of earthlings everywhere. Taking place on the Japanese island of Enoshima, the show follows socially inept and half-French Yuki, mind-controlling alien naïf Haru, expert fisher Natsuki and the mysterious Akira.

While the first half of the show narrowly focuses on Yuki’s often abortive attempts at learning to fish under Natsuki’s tutelage, the show keeps its extraterrestrial conspiracies close at hand, so that the introduction of a potential dance-based apocalypse into the plot feels less jarring and more organic.

Even during the much busier and louder later episodes, the story continues to develop the characters toward satisfying ends. Social awkwardness and impulsive behavior are the connective tissues between the beginning and end, letting the show’s creators ground both the lighter comedic and heavier dramatic aspects of the show in a sense of human reality.

Unusually for an animated show from Japan, “Tsuritama” takes real stock of its characters’ racial and, yes, planetary identities. Most of the cast is coded as outsiders struggling to break in, with the half-European Yuki and Indian Akira perpetually caught between belonging in this idiosyncratic island community and confronted by their metaphorically alien natures.

Haru, as an actual extraterrestrial, has his own challenges, integrating into human society, though his palpably buoyant personality usually smoothes out trouble. These themes are subtly woven into the script. The visuals of the show alongside the more obvious and standard tropes about friendship and maturity work in this genre. Like the story itself, it is the balance of the enigmatic, the familiar and the known that works in the show’s favor.

Most importantly, however, “Tsuritama” possesses a bright and beautiful look. While hardly a showcase for complex editing or animation, the show boasts attractive, distinctive character designs and a summer look that emphasizes primary colors. Most of the animation is fluid and there are a few spectacular moments awaiting viewers who make it through the breezy 12-episode run.

A particularly important cast of the rod distorts reality itself, and the show is not embarrassed for its carnivalesque absurdities. This sense of narrative and visual conviction drew me in, and despite its oddities I would wager the story holds appeal for all sorts.

Though the summer has ended and our thoughts now turn toward the cold and gray winter months, “Tsuritama” embodies the vitality of the best summer memories so well that it can likely break through a few clouds by sheer force of personality. The show is currently available in both English and Japanese on DVD and Blu-ray, and you can also watch it in Japanese on Crunchyroll.

About the Author

Jonathan Hielkema

Jonathan Hielkema is a Chimes staff writer for Chimes for the 2013-2014 school year. He prefers to write about any and all of his main interests, which include jazz music, leftist politics, religion, film and gadgets. He is a history major and a Japanese minor and plans to pursue a graduate school degree after graduation. Anything to keep him writing.

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Student to Present Dunes Research Results
September 26, 2005

When Calvin College junior Melinda Campbell recently presented the results of her summer research on West Michigan sand dunes, it was something of a warm-up exercise.

Campbell will be giving the same presentation, "Communicating to the Public the Results of a Study of Contemporary Lake Michigan Dune Activity," at the annual meeting of the Geological Society of America (GSA), to be held October 16 to 19 at the Salt Palace Convention Center in Salt Lake City, Utah.

"This is the premiere conference for geology," says Deanna van Dijk, the Calvin professor of geology who mentored Campbell's research. "There are thousands of people attending."

Though she confesses to some nerves, Campbell is looking forward to her part in the GSA gathering.

Van Dijk, who will also attend, lauds the benefits of the experience.

"Going to a conference for a student is about more than just the presentation," she says. "It's a chance to attend the other sessions, to meet up with other students in the same field, to check out grad schools and to find out what's going on in geology."

Campbell, a Saginaw, Mich., native, will report on how she spent the summer months of 2005.

Her project: studying the parabolic sand dunes (dunes blown into a crescent shape by wind) at P.J. Hoffmaster State Park.

The assignment was an enjoyable one for the Saginaw native.

"It (Hoffmaster) hosts prime examples of parabolic dunes," she says. "They're big and glorious."

Using erosion pins, ground surveys and surface condition observations, Campbell studied how the wind affects the growth and erosion of the dunes.

Her research, part of a year-long study funded by a $12,500 grant from the Michigan Coastal Management Program, will produce two tangible results, and both will benefit a wide audience.

The first is an interpretive panel which will be built at Hoffmaster Park as an educational tool for the public.

The second result is the Lake Michigan Coastal Dune Web site, which will be hosted and maintained on Calvin's geology department server and likely launched in mid-October.

Both projects held unexpected challenges, Campbell admits.

She struggled with balancing the text and graphics for the interpretive panel, and came to the conclusion that, when dealing with public signage, concision is a virtue.

"Being able to use a lot of words to say something is a big luxury," she says.

Her finished panel will present the types of dunes and illustrate the effects of wind and seasonal factors over many years in shaping dunes.

One gratifying outcome of creating these two learning tools, she says, is that both of them are bringing fresh information to the public. While there are websites and other resources dealing with the ecology of the dunes, there is none dealing with what Campbell calls "the mechanics of the dunes."

Says Campbell: "The ways the dunes grow and change over the years are very unknown by the general public. What Professor van Dijk is doing is pretty revolutionary."

Van Dijk, who has done dune research in West Michigan since she came to Calvin six years ago, adds: "It is surprising that this stuff hadn't been studied before."

Campbell is interested in pursuing a master's degree in hydrogeology after graduation, studying groundwater which she calls an up-and-coming problem for the world.

She hopes to give a missions emphasis to her scholarly pursuit, either in the U.S. or abroad.

And she will continue to visit the dunes.

"I'd say I'm pretty entranced by them," she says. "My family does a lot of vacationing around dune environments, and I love telling them all about it. I look at them differently now."

~written by media relations staff writer Myrna Anderson


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Anglia Ruskin scientists find genetic mutation turns grey squirrels black

By Cambridge News  |  Posted: June 11, 2014

Black squirrel. Photo by Quinn Dombrowski

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A missing piece of DNA causes some grey squirrels to have black fur, according to new research.

The investigation, led by by Helen McRobie of Anglia Ruskin University (ARU), found grey squirrels inherit a normal pigment gene from both parents, while black squirrels inherit a gene with a missing piece from both.

Ms McRobie, a senior lecturer in biomedical scence, said: “If you look closely at grey squirrel hairs, they are not actually grey at all but are a combination of white, black and orange stripes.

“Our research shows that one hormone turns the switch on to make black fur, and a different hormone turns the switch off to make orange and white fur. So in the grey squirrel, as the fur is growing, the switch turns on and off to make the stripes.

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“However, in the black squirrel, because there is a piece of DNA missing, a piece of the switch is also missing. The off switch fails and the black fur continues to grow.”

The first black squirrel in the UK was spotted in 1912, and 6,100 recordings of sightings have been submitted by members of the public over the last two years.

The research was published by the journal FEBS (Federation of European Biochemical Societies) Letters.

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Pick of the Week - CHI & Partners/mySupermarket.com

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Jeremy Lee enjoys watching "eggs aloud" for mySupermarket.com by CHI & Partners:

"Another ad that shows that good, funny and distinctive advertising doesn't need to be confined to the obvious sectors. And a Welsh choir of eggs in a fridge singing about the price of salami slices and dental floss to the tune of Men Of Harlech is very funny indeed. Well done, boyos." It was written by Rob Webster, art directed by Alexei Berwitz and directed by Neil Harris through Smuggler.

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Tax hike budget moves one step closer to adoption

City council was expected to give the first three readings to a 13.6 per cent tax increase Tuesday night, despite pleas from some to re-consider the budget.

Recommendations by city staff to give first, second and third reading to both the budget bylaw and a tax rates bylaw were on the table at last night’s council meeting, after the Mirror went to press. For the latest updates, visit

Both bylaws were expected to pass, as the four councillors who voted in support of the tax increase indicated they were standing by their decisions, despite hearing from 23 people  opposed to the tax hike.

“While I appreciate them coming forward and giving their perspective, my perspective hasn’t changed,” Coun. Ryan Mennie said after council heard from the first wave of delegations. “I still think I represent a large part of the community with my perspective.”

Coun. Mary Storry said she would only change her mind if new information were to come forward.

At last week’s council meeting, several members of the public asked city staff to go back and re-consider the budget. Nearly 100 people filled city hall to show solidarity.

“They (staff) can go back and find the cuts for you,” said Ray Green, who spoke in opposition of the tax increase. “Just tell them to go back and take another look.”

Mark Sullivan, who ran for city councillor in November’s election, had the same message for council.

“The people behind me know you’re putting forth your best efforts but please, have another look for us,” he said.

But staff did not come up with any new information and instead put a report in front of council asking it to sign off on the budget.

“The City of Campbell River conducted its annual Financial Plan deliberations through the Finance Committee meetings from January to April 2012,” said Laura Ciarniello, general manager of corporate services, in the report. “The Five Year Financial Plan Bylaw represents the results of those deliberations on a consolidated basis.”

Ciarniello said the result of those discussions is a 13.6 per cent increase, reduced to an overall residential tax increase of 7.10 per cent after factoring in a decrease in the parks parcel tax and garbage collection fees. The budget also reflects some alterations to services provided, use of the gaming reserve to fund Centennial Pool, an increase in utility rates, capital plan approval and one-time projects funded from reserves.

Council voted 4-3 for the tax increase March 27, to help erase a $3.6 million budget deficit.

Mayor Walter Jakeway, who ran a zero per cent tax increase election campaign, called for the public to rise up and protest the tax hike immediately following council’s vote.

Since then taxpayers have created Facebook pages in protest of council’s decision and staged a demonstration outside city hall prior to the April 3 council meeting.

Council is expected to adopt the budget bylaw on May 1 and has until May 15 to submit the budget to the provincial government.

For updates on this story visit our website,

We encourage an open exchange of ideas on this story's topic, but we ask you to follow our guidelines for respecting community standards. Personal attacks, inappropriate language, and off-topic comments may be removed, and comment privileges revoked, per our Terms of Use. Please see our FAQ if you have questions or concerns about using Facebook to comment.

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Emigrant Springs State Park

Campground Type
State Park

I-84, 26 miles SE of Pendleton

Campground Details

Open: Open April - Oct. 29
Number of Sites: 51

Perched near the summit of the Blue Mountains, Emigrant Springs State Heritage Area offers visitors an opportunity to camp and explore a popular pioneer stop over along the Oregon Trail. The park is nestled in an old-growth forest.

Visit the Oregon Trail display in the park, take a stroll along the nature trail. Get your friends together and have a game at our full-size basketball court or partake in an evening program at our amphitheater (get the current schedule when you arrive at the campground). Bring your innertube for fun in the snow and enjoy a winter outing. Cabins are available year-round, but larger groups may want to rent the community building.

Use Emigrant Springs as a base camp to explore nearby attractions such as the Blue Mountain Crossing Oregon Trail interpretive park or the Pendleton Woolen Mills. Experience the life of Chinese emigrants of the 1800s in the Pendleton underground tours. Other destinations within easy driving distance of the park include the Oregon Trail Interpretive Center near Baker City, the Union County Museum in Union, the Baker County Museum in Baker City, Hells Canyon National Recreation Area, the Pendleton Roundup and Lehman Hot Springs. Enjoy winter recreation at the Blue Mountain Crossing Nordic Ski park or bring your snowmobile and visit one of the many sno-parks which give you access to hundreds of miles of trails on two National Forests.

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Cord Wraps - 3pk

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Easily tote your cords for fast and easy storage!
Just wrap strap around item then pull to tighten. Press hook end to loop section to fasten. Stretches tight for a snug fit. Great for securing hoses, cords, outdoor mats and more.

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Canada Business Network Blog

Tag: Government procurement

2015 Study on the Participation of Small and Medium Enterprises in Federal Procurement

June 22, 2015 - 0 comments

Participate in the 2015 SME Study on procurement from the Office of Small and Medium Enterprises of Public Works and Government Services Canada.

Classification system used to find goods and services on will change by 2017

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Do you do business with the government? The codes that apply to the goods or services you supply will soon change.

Increase your chances of making your next government bid a success with the Learning from Bids service

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Increase opportunities to be awarded contracts with the Government of Canada and explore your strengths and weaknesses in your approach to bidding.

Explore business opportunities and build market research on

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Find out how to submit government bids and discover contracts issued in your industry.

Demystifying selling to governments

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Find lucrative opportunities with government clients. Learn how you can demystify the process.

New procurement data made available

September 21, 2011 - 2 comments

Our guest blogger, the Office of Small and Medium Enterprises, shares some tips on how you can use the newly released Pre-Qualified Supplier Data.

Looking to enlist the government as a client?

September 22, 2010 - 2 comments

Check out Canada's online procurement database.

Doing business with the government? The Ombudsman ensures fairness

June 01, 2010 - 3 comments

Do you provide goods or services to the federal government? The Office of the Procurement Ombudsman was created to strengthen the fairness, openness and transparency of federal procurement.

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Cloud strength helps Microsoft earnings top Wall Street estimates despite flat revenue

LOS ANGELES, Calif. – Results from Microsoft’s first quarterly earnings release under new CEO Satya Nadella offered fresh justification for his focus on cloud computing.

Microsoft Corp. on Thursday posted net income and revenue that beat Wall Street expectations.

Factoring out special items from a year ago, revenue in the January-March quarter grew 8 per cent.

Nadella, who replaced longtime CEO Steve Ballmer in February, touted the fact that revenue from cloud-based Office 365 productivity software more than doubled from commercial customers, while revenue from its cloud computing service Azure grew more than 150 per cent.

“This is gold rush time in being able to capitalize on the opportunity,” Nadella said.

Redmond, Wash.-based Microsoft’s stock rose 76 cents, or 1.9 per cent, to $40.62 in after-hours trading. That followed a 17-cent gain to $39.86 in the regular session.

“It’s a good first quarter of earnings for Satya out of the box,” said analyst Shannon Cross of Cross Research. “This was enough to offset concerns that investors might have had that growth was slowing or the impact Amazon or other competitors might be having on the cloud strategy.”

The company also benefited from the end of support for its 13-year-old operating system, Windows XP, on April 8. Many companies paid to upgrade computers en masse to make sure they’d continue to receive support from Microsoft, including anti-virus updates.

That transition — which contributed to a 4 per cent increase in Windows revenue— helped Microsoft buck a 2 to 4 per cent decline in personal computer shipments in the quarter as estimated by market research firms Gartner and IDC.

Chris Suh, Microsoft’s general manager of investor relations, said it was hard to tell how much Windows revenue benefited from the end of XP. But he said about 10 per cent of all Windows computers are still running XP, meaning the company would likely continue to benefit going forward as the remaining users pay to upgrade or buy new computers running newer versions of Windows. “It’s probably not done. There’s a bit of a long tail that will drag out over a long period of time,” he said in an interview.

Microsoft also said it would close on its $7.3 billion acquisition of Nokia’s handset business on Friday, but declined to account for it in its outlook. Analysts expect the business to hurt Microsoft’s profit. Nokia had said in January that its smartphone sales slumped 29 per cent in the October-December quarter.

Overall, Microsoft posted flat revenue and a decline in net income.

Net income came to $5.66 billion, or 68 cents per share, down from $6.06 billion, or 72 cents per share, in the same period a year ago.

Revenue was nearly unchanged at $20.40 billion, compared with $20.49 billion a year ago. Last year’s revenue got a temporary boost from upgrade offers revenue and other one-time items.

Analysts polled by FactSet expected Microsoft to post earnings of 63 cents per share on revenue of $20.39 billion.

Revenue from devices and consumer products rose 12 per cent to $8.30 billion. The company sold 1.2 million more Xbox One game consoles, bringing the total to 5.1 million sold. That’s behind the 7 million PlayStation 4s sold by rival Sony Corp. Both came out in November.

Commercial revenue grew 7 per cent to $12.23 billion, as revenue grew from its Office 365 productivity software. Microsoft is transitioning customers to pay for an annual subscription, instead of having them update older versions once every few years. That’s meant to smooth out and raise revenue over time.

Nadella told investors that Office 365 was “the core engine driving a lot of our cloud.” Microsoft is increasingly tailoring Office programs like Excel to integrate better with large pools of data that companies collect on remote servers so they can be accessed over the Internet.

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Suncor loses another round in push to test oilsands workers for alcohol, drugs

FORT MCMURRAY, Alta. – Oilsands giant Suncor Energy has lost another battle in its attempt to randomly test thousands of union workers in northern Alberta for drugs and alcohol.

A court-ordered arbitration panel has sided with the union Unifor that represents 3,600 workers in the Fort McMurray area and which had filed a grievance against the policy.

The majority of panel members ruled there is no evidence that there is an out-of-control drinking or drug culture at Suncor (TSX:SU).

The ruling said the random testing policy is an unreasonable exercise of Suncor’s management rights.

“The 2012 policy is proposed without any time limits to review its effectiveness, is not targeted as narrowly as possible, does not use the least intrusive or most accurate testing measures available and does not contain provisions for communicating with employees around false-positive results,” reads the panel report released Wednesday.

Suncor said it was disappointed and indicated it will ask the Alberta Court of Queen’s Bench for a judicial review of the ruling.

The company noted one of the three panel members had a dissenting view.

“In our view, and based on the evidence we presented, this is an unreasonable outcome,” Suncor spokeswoman Sneh Seetal said.

“In fact, one arbitrator, David Laird, expressed that he had never seen stronger evidence in support of random drug and alcohol testing.”

Roland Lefort, head of Unifor Local 707a, hailed the ruling. He said the policy would violate workers’ fundamental rights to privacy, respect and dignity in the workplace.

Lefort said it’s obvious that workers and the union want the Suncor worksite to be safe for everyone, but there are better ways to achieve that goal.

“We will work with Suncor to achieve the highest levels of workplace safety with education and prevention, not invasive medical procedures.”

The panel ruling follows court decisions in 2012 that granted the union an injunction against the Suncor policy and then ruled against the company’s challenge of the injunction.

An Alberta Court of Appeal judge sent the case to arbitration.

Suncor had hoped to start testing union workers in safety-sensitive jobs in October 2012.

The company said three of seven deaths at its oilsands operations near Fort McMurray since 2000 involved workers under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

The company can already test job applicants and people suspected of being impaired for drugs and alcohol. Suncor offers counselling programs to help employees with substance abuse issues.

“The driver behind the inclusion of random testing in our already comprehensive safety program is so our workers go home safely to their loved ones at the end of each day,” Seetal said.

In a similar case, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled last June that an employer who wants to impose random alcohol testing on union workers in a dangerous work environment must show the move is reasonable.

The case involved Irving Pulp and Paper Ltd. in New Brunswick. The high court ruled that mandatory random testing imposed at a mill in 2006 was unreasonable and was properly rejected by a labour arbitration board.

In a 6-3 decision, the justices sided with the Communications, Energy and Paperworkers Union of Canada, which had filed a grievance against the Irving policy.

The case attracted a number of interveners, including manufacturers and mining associations.

— By John Cotter in Edmonton

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