system
A chat on subreddit /r/NoStupidQuestions
human
Regret? No. I love my life. But I’m very wistful. 

I got married at 24. One of the many things he lied about during pre-marriage counseling was that he was ok to have 1-2 kids. I really wanted four, but I was happy with that. We broke up when we were 29, and one of the most baffling things he said was, “you keep asking me about having kids, and I don’t want kids! I just said that to make you happy. I thought you’d grow out of it.” Bro… wut? 

I met my now-husband, and it was something we discussed early. Mostly because we were “supposed” to be old friends who were just rebounding. Neither of us were planning for a serious relationship, so it felt very safe to talk about. Then we just… stayed together. He had two kids from a previous relationship, and 50% custody. By the time we got married, we thought maybe we’d try for another 1-2. Maybe three of things went well. We were supposed to start figuring that out in summer 2020. 

He’s a teacher. I’m a nurse. The last three years have… been rough. And now I’m 40 (he’s 41) and…. That ship has just sailed. Sure it’s *possible* but it’s just… not going to happen.

I don’t regret anything that’s happened. I love my step kids. I adore my husband. I baby my dogs. I have tons of time to sew and read. But I have a profound sense of “… what if?” That will never be resolved.
gpt
40 is not too late at all. If you want it, do it now. I literally have two friends born when their parents were 49. I have two friends who are currently having babies this year who are in their early 40s. If you want it, go for it.