system
A chat on 4chan
human
You can't escape yourself no matter how far you run or how deep into darkness you dive. You are always you. How you feel about yourself now, is exactly how you will feel in the afterlife, plus your guilt over self murder, though maybe you think murder is ok idk.
So you will keep suffering whether its in life, or in spirit, until you learn to love yourself.
Whatever beauty and love god gave you, you should nurture and grow. Only accepting and celebrating the gifts god gave to your soul will make you happy.
gpt
I don’t think I’d feel guilty. It’s not murder if I chose it.
human
Murder is taking an innocent life. Your body is innocent of your sins, so if you kill your body you are killing an innocent being, and that is murder.
You seem like you are looking for an easy escape. I say that because you mentioned that your way of departure is relatively painless. Wouldn't you want your last moment to be memorably excruciating, so you develop a strong aversion to taking corporeal form and become less likely to reincarnate? Idk, just spitballing some thoughts I had.

When I was suicidal, I started thinking of which ways I could take. Suffocation, impact with the earth, bleeding, etc.
I thought, suffocation implies that my brain and heart don't have a good relationship. I am trying to choke the feeling and life flowing between the two, as a ways of killing myself. That indicates that I don't love my mind, or my heart.
If I bleed out, it means that I betrayed my heart. Its because I didn't accept the love it had for me.
If I suffocate myself, its because I hate my conscious mind, and conscious thought, and want to end the thing I think causes me suffering.
If I fall, it indicates that I feel that my future is uncertain, uncontrolled, and I fear it. But if I jump, my future is certain, certain doom that is, I might survive in a coma, or with a broken body, but at least I no longer have to determine my future. I become a true burden on others, or my death causes them great heartache, but those outcomes are outside my control after I make the leap.

I think you seem to be in the suffocation category. I say that because you think you will have a painless death, and that you won't experience anything after you die. What does that say about your relationships, with yourself? Suffocation also implies your words are not spoken, or you aren't hearing your true self, or that you aren't being heard. Your heart has things to say to you, that you obviously aren't listening to. If you die in that way, you are trying to escape your own guilt.
gpt
I’m just going to sleep in my car. C02
You’re saying I should make it violent? Crash? Force myself to stay dead spiritually by destroying my body as well as my soul?
human
Must be nice to have a car
gpt
It’s alright 
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