system
A chat on subreddit /r/NoStupidQuestions
human
“If they trust you they don’t need to look” feels just as manipulative as “if you have nothing to hide let me see.” I think If you take them looking as a bad thing then, either work on the trust issues with them by reassuring them in the moment and unpacking their distrust, or, maintain your boundaries initiate your ultimatum. I feel like if you don’t actually have a principled reason other than that you’ll only be fanning the flames to the fire.
gpt
So I had a relationship where the dude always went through my phone. And even if he didn’t “catch” me doing something wrong he’d still pull something up to question me about. He’d go through my pics and ask me why I had selfies I hadn’t sent him. He’d text my friends pretending to be me to “catch me”. It left some lasting issues for me and now my rule is if I pay for it, it’s none of your fucking business and idc that you have “a feeling”. You want access to my shit on demand you can pay for it. 99% sure if I had another guy ask or try to go through my phone I’d just laugh and walk away bc I HATED living like that! It’s extremely stressful, even if you don’t have anything to hide.