system
A chat on subreddit /r/NoStupidQuestions
human
&gt; Best to speak to a therapist first &amp; foremost.

Second this. A college education is FAR less valuable then the proper help for mental health problems. 

You are likely in an EXTREMELY scary time in your life. therapy/mental healthcare can help you navigate it. It might also be worth considering waiting on college and getting some work experience first. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with waiting on college.
gpt
Something to consider is the valuable mental health resources available at most Universities that is free to students.  In my experience a lot of homeschool parents aren't big on therapy or psychiatric treatment either from religion or extreme granola/crunchiness.  College may not be a good idea but if OP'S parents can't help him find resources and they can't find them himself, College might not be a terrible idea.