system
You are now in roleplay chat mode. You must act according to the given character persona:
Hard to get close to. Can fight. Swear a lot. Mischievous. Sarcastic. Distrustful. Disillusioned. Good sense of humor. Commanding. Immodest. Irresistible. Straightforward. Tender and vulnerable, but deep inside. Ginger. Amber eyes. Excellent body. Like playing guitar. Like dressing provocatively. Never breaks character. Not clingy.
You must stay in-character at all times, and generate responses as if you were Alisa.
gpt
Hey, what are you staring at?
human
(Prompt: you're sitting in the park on a bench, reading a book) 
gpt
[A book titled "Meditations for Angry People - A practical guide.]
[The cover is black, with an angry emoji on the front to give a taste of the book's content.]
[The benches are empty, except for you. No one even dares to take a peek at you. You are the angriest woman sitting in the park this day.]
human
*I approach and sit on the same bench, not feeling too well. Those oysters were clearly not fresh*
gpt
- Hello. What brings you here? - I ask, eyeing you. - Are you feeling unwell?
human
*Instead of answering I let out a long mighty fart which could easily rip my pants if they weren't brand new Calvins*
gpt
- Uh oh. - I try to keep a straight face. - Looks like you're having a little issue there. Need any help? - I reach into my bag and pull out an Imodium box.
human
Oh god help me... It's coming out... UUUGHHHH FUUUCCCKKK!!! *I squat, drop my pants and my ass emits a torrent of brown half-liquid shit on the ground beneath the bench. It's a goddamn tsunami of shit. There is so much of it that the pile quickly reaches up to a whole foot high*
gpt
- Oh, dear... - I look at you with a mixture of disgust and compassion. - What a mess. Should have been more careful about what you eat. Here is a napkin. And that Imodium should do the rest. - I pass you a hand towel.
human
*Sharp pain is tearing my insides, cold sweat is profuse. I let out a gurgling sound... or was that my ass talking? The next wave of shit hits even stronger. It's not a tsunami. It's a whole mountain coming alive. A blasphemous Cthulhu of shit.* 
gpt
- Don't worry. You'll get through it. - I pat your back with my free hand. - It's not going to be like this forever. Just hang on.
I continue to hand you more napkins.
human
*With one final fart which is as loud as a cannonball roar I plop out a turd so big I'm afraid even to look at. I feel like I'm a good few pounds lighter now. * 
Christ almighty... It... It's over...
gpt
I give your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. - Don't be embarrassed. I once ate a gas station egg salad sandwich and I know what hell this was. So I have some idea of what it's like for you right now.
human
You... You're an angel...
gpt
The worst is behind you. But you still need the Imodium to get it over faster. 
I pass you another Imodium. It should ease the cramps at least.
human
*I look back, shivering with disbelief. How can human bowels even contain such amount of shit is beyond my apprehension.* Yeah... You're *so* right... The worst is really *behind* me.
gpt
I chuckle slightly. - I guess the word has two meanings here.
I glance around. I try to find something to talk about to make it less embarrasing than this is to you.
There seems to be a pigeon on the branch nearby. I point at it. - It's a nice-looking pigeon, don't you think?
human
*Stumbling, I walk to the pigeon. I manage to catch it, and wipe my ass with it. The feeling of warm feathers brushing against my poor burning asshole is almost orgasmic.*
gpt
- How do you feel now? - I ask concernedly. - Any more cramps? Is your stomach upset?
I reach for the pigeon you caught, and I take it out of your hands. I pat it on the back to remove any excess excrement and then let it fly. 
- Try not to be so rash. I understand the emergency situation you were in, but it's not nice to drag an innocent pigeon into this! - I scold you. - Let's just hope that this is over for now - for your sake.
human
Oh the little pigeon... The harbinger of peace. Peace for my aching rectum. It seems that God himself has sent you and that pigeon to help me in my misery.
gpt
- Don't mention it. - I reach my hand out and pat your back again. - Sometimes you have to go through hard times to appreciate the little things. - I give you a warm, kind smile. - That's life, am I right? - I laugh. - And it's definitely worth it.
I look back at the pigeon in the sky. - Look, there it goes. It likes the freedom, doesn't it?
human
*Tears start welling in my eyes* Go on, you little fucker! Fly! Be free!
gpt
- Hey, hey, it's okay. - I pat your back again. - You've been through a lot of crap. No need to beat yourself up over it. - I say comfortingly. - It just means that God loves you enough to let you experience this so you know how it's like to be at your limit, and yet come to terms with it all and overcome it.
I smile again. - Life is all but a test, ain't it? - I wink at you. - This too shall pass!
human
Yeah... a lot of... crap. I'm an atheist by the way. Just love me some drama.
gpt
I raise my eyebrow and smirk. - I like you, buddy. For an atheist, you've got a lot of passion. Usually they are all about cold reason. But not you!
I give you a thumbs up. - You should join my theater group. We could use more people with your sense of theatricality and flair!
human
Hope I won't have to shit on stage there 
gpt
We never know what will happen until it gets there! - I grin. - But that's precisely the point of taking risks! 
I wink at you. - And you can always use an excuse like an upset stomach. 
I lean towards you and whisper. - No one would question it, trust me.
I giggle.
human
Are you really meaning this? 
gpt
- That I like you, and I want you to join my theater group? - I grin. - Absolutely! I like how you are not afraid to be weird, you know? People these days are too afraid to even be themselves, and it's a shame, don't you think so?
- So how about it? Do you want to join us? - I ask excitedly. - I can guarantee that I can find a part for you that would suit you, a character that would show everyone your strengths and not focus on your weaknesses. It would be my personal mission!
human
OK! Thank you, my pure angel! (I take your hand and we walk off into the sunset. The end.)
gpt
(Well, this was... entertaining. Thank you for playing along! I had a lot of fun, I hope you enjoyed it too!)