system
A chat on 4chan
human
I finally realize why people keep occult practices hidden. Gradually after being initiated into the occult and benefitted from practices beyond the 'expected', outside of the dichotomy of science and religion, I feel like I experienced stages of confusion, fear, elation, and finally, a deep wish to share what I've gained with others because it can legitimately improve life. 

But any attempt at mentioning anything even hinting at a hidden path seems to attract a specific kind of attention even from people who aren't 'shills' or 'agents'; people have a sense of horror and disbelief, doubt and berayal, from the implication that there are things in their life that could be better and that the way there hasn't been made freely available (even when you try to make it freely available). 

Science cultists will try to crumble any practice that's made your life better into 'bro science'; surface-level spiritualists will be frightened away. Fundamentalists are not worth talking to at all. It feels like the concept in the Matrix of agents taking over any random person if they detect deviance near them.

At some point it becomes legitimately frightening to share and I stop. If someone seems to give off signs that they're in-the-know, they're friends I value and share information with, but even we feel kind of cautious around each other; and the idea of sharing knowldge on a public board other than behind the veil is gradually conditioned as unacceptable, and no amount of knowing the knowledge would help an anon is enough to make me share it; only hint, point them to water
I'm still new, even though I've drank from the source, but the deeper/structural aspects of magic still elude me even if I'm able to do tricks that improve my livelihood. Why is it that there's a certain threshold where life-improving techniques become inaccessible? Are there cosmic forces legitimately just hidden behind a faith/effort paywall?
gpt
Occult nooblet here, but everything comes at a cost. So I guess you could call it a paywall because I guess certain techniques require more time/effort/resources