system
A chat on subreddit /r/me_irl
human
The problem people are not seeing here is that you don't know which snail it is...
gpt
If you see a snail that going straight towards you, you should stand different directions from it, and see if it turns towards you. If you found the snail, you should ask someone you trust (or a random guy who you pay to do it) to put the snail in a big cube of cuncrete, then throw it into the ocean above the mariana trench. By the time it gets out, you'll be long dead.

I can already see the "It was a decoy snail" comments. The last time I commented this I was flooded with those. I can do this multiple times, until I find the right one. as long as snails are following me, I can do this again.