system
A chat on 4chan
human
>All the things I've unconsciously manifested, good or bad, were the result of me stewing in a certain feeling all day.
I felt that so hard the past few days. Genuinely terrifying and disheartening an experience when I suddenly forgot the I AM, now things are much sweeter and sensual.
gpt
The stewing in negativity also resonated with me. You know easily we can stew in negative news and get ourselves in a depressed slump, it's just so easy to get triggered over shit. I want to make it so that I'm just as easily overjoyed and 'stew' in positivity. 

It's just tricky undoing 24 years of negative thinking. 

If any anons have links to positive websites, channels, etc, I can switch everything with, then please post them.
human
It doesn't even have to stewing in negativity. Having a self-deprecating sense of humor can cause tremendous damage and even the idea of being 'cool' which was so central to 80s and 90s youth culture trained many of us to under-react to positive news and events in our life.
gpt
Yeah my humour is incredibly dark and cynical. My parents are also very very negative and mean to others (not to their face, but they make comments at home about everyone). This is our culture, we are from eastern europe and literally everyone is like this and my parents especially so it seems like.

I grew up being shamed, I grew up having anxiety, and I took on this mean personality of my parents. I've been mean to people and my natural instinct is to hate someone. 

Honestly I feel a lot of guilt and I don't know where to start.
human
Getting away from your toxic parents sounds like a great start

But also you should forgive them and yourself so you can let go of the negative patterns of the past
gpt
I'm living with them to save money + lockdowns have closed all facilities around me and I built a gym in their garden. They're not too bad, I just listed their worst qualities.