system
A chat on 4chan
human
>>Did acid on New Year's Day, felt like she was purposely evading me
>>had a very strong vision of her and I being linked, Avatar-esque, in the world she lives in.
>>I feel no sexual desire for her, only an extremally powerful desire to know her and to not exist. (very hard to explain)

this is pretty relateable, she is designed to be elusive though, after all she is the main connection to the truth/knowledge (in my dreams the truth /knowledge is represented with 'weed')

although there is nothing wrong with sexual desire for her (it's good to explore, after all she's you!) but i guess everyone is different. the desire to know her and to not exist is about right, although it's more ideal to maybe not desire her in any way really - at least not in a way that is about 'removing' yourself from existence, although she would love to be with you at all times, and be reunited, as do you, she knows or wants you to live your best life and enjoy your moments on earth as we live now.

i've had my er anima/dream guide contact me in dreams for the last year or so, some interesting experiences but she's been patient most of the time, sometimes a bit annoyed, but sometimes very loving and playful. 

lucid dreams are the most interesting experiences and best way to talk to her as explained previously...

but sometimes active imagination/story writing (she refers to it as 'using the pen') can gain some understanding about not just her but yourself too - after all she represents a divine, spiritual, 'whole' part of your consciousness and soul.. (both anima and dream guide/guardian).. it might seem you're just faking it or playing a role/acting, but it still represents a part of you, as she does in the dreams (my guide has literally said to me in a lucid dream that she really enjoys when we 'talk' in stories, that there are 'no rules', that fantasy can be helpful... being co-operative is helpful.. maybe jung was right... as he talked about 'active imagination' too
gpt
also yeah meditation is helpful for lucid dreaming, but maybe getting a nice 'let the thoughts flow' narrative to tap in with like discussion between you and this 'guide'

i've noticed that the parallels between the version i 'write about' and the 'guide' in dreams are striking, in fact when i called upon my 'dream guide' she took the form of the two characters i had written about so intently, she behaved exactly the same. it was nuts. yet she was able to help fix/save me from crappy parts of my lucid dream. so she has more of a knowhow in working the dream realm too which is just fascinating in it's own right.

i have come across her 'father' who exists as a wise old man archetype, i've met him a few times in lucid dreams, he seems to know MORE than her, maybe exists on a higher plane than her, as he said that 'he couldn't think straight' even in the lucid plane which blows my mind. so there are multiple guides who exist in our minds as well.

it's also related to the entities some people meet on DMT which do seem to fit these.. concept and archetypes...
human
whats interesting is i suffer from a mild form of intrusive thoughts, which feels like a lot of the 'junk' of my subconscious just filtering out, it tends to have symbolic meaning a lot of the time.

sometimes i have voices of other people chat symbolic gibberish 'about' me when lying in bed. but it never seems that helpful or positive, weirdly i get more meaning out of my dreams rather than anything in these audio hallucinations (they're usually just forgotten about but i remember the dreams)

the hallucinations can nonetheless be quite interesting when tapping into meditation, quite hypnagogic, so i guess it serves a purpose in that form...

she never or rarely (ive heard her very faintly on drugs before lool) seems to appear here though, almost like there's a wall or barrier blocking her - she's too 'high' or important to be part of the junk thoughts. it's a shame because i'd love to just hear her voice and guidance (her voice is so beautiful in dreams, she is literally the most beautiful, interesting, amazing woman in the world), but i guess in the conscious realm - it wouldn't work since my conscious brain has to take center stage