Everyone loves to win, whether the win is in a game, prize,
contest, sport, legal matter, lottery, promotion, prized mate,
or any other physical or intellectual achievement that the
winner is blessed to receive. There is uniqueness in getting the
top prize. Being accomplished or lucky elevates one's esteem and
garners the adulation of others. In love relationships, however,
winning is losing.  George Orwell said, "Whoever is winning at
the moment will always seem to be invincible." The respect and
glory attributed to the achieving or lucky individual bestows
one with exceptional power.  Vince Lombardi explained, "Winning
isn't everything, but the will to win is everything." Perhaps
the spirit and effort involved in seeking the win is what is
admirable.  If winning is such a desired state, why would it not
be equally valued within a loving relationship? The reason is
that when one mate wins it often creates a loss for the other.
Sandra Murray and John Holmes found that "Relationships were
most likely to persi