Episode Report Card Omar G: B- | Grade It Now! Tell Lara I Love
Her  We open on Krypton. Damn, this planet sucks! There are at
least two suns in the sky (hello, SPF 5000) and missiles flying
across the sky. We see a sunset on the horizon and a fortress of
some sort where the design aesthetic was "Mid-Century
Porcupine." It's the kind of thing some teenager weaned on Iron
Maiden and Judas Priest might paint. With an airbrush. At the
mall for a T-shirt. I think when your planet starts to look like
this, you're better off just letting it explode. Inside the
orange-tinged Fortress of Crapitude, what looks like a wizard in
dark robes is leading a young lady by the hand as shit falls
apart around them. It's Young Gay Dumbledore! Oh, wait, it's
Kara wearing white robes, asking her father, in the dark robes,
not to send her away. Zor-El (¡Olé!) tells her this is the only
way. She'll be safer on Earth, since this planet is going to
Hell in a crystal-spiked handbasket. Kara bitches that it takes
three years to get to E