Thursday, April 21, 2005  Keep Your Ads Off My Body  You know
what I wish?  I wish I could knit a ballcap.  It's not that I
particularly want a knitted ballcap, or even that I think it's a
good idea. I just wish I could make my own, somehow. (Origami?
Macramé?)  As you'll note from my photograph, I'm bald as an
egg. I like the look, but in a climate like Chicago's it gets
chilly. A hat's not a fashion statement for me, it's survival
gear.  In this transitional season I like to switch from a pull-
on knitted hat to a cap. However, I don't want to pay good money
in order to turn my forehead into an ad for The Gap, Nike,
Abercrombie & Fitch, a major league baseball team, Flo's E-Z
Tan, The Knights of Columbus, or anybody else.  Just you try
finding a plain baseball cap these days.  There's a custom
shirts and hats place in my neighborhood that I thought might be
the answer to my prayers. You know the sort of place I mean -
they'll embroider or silkscreen whatever you want on their stock
of blank items.  Problem i