Quick! Think of the first Twilight joke that pops into your
head! Was it about sparkling vampires? Maybe it was about
shirtless werewolves? Either way, congratulations! You are now a
professional screenwriter, on the same level as the writers of
Vampires Suck, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer (the writing-
directing pair who brought us Epic Movie and Disaster Movie).
Let me get the positives out of the way first -- Vampires Suck
represents a small step forward for the pair: actually
channeling their anti-creative energies on one specific target,
the overwhelmingly popular Twilight Saga film series. Because of
this, they've actually challenged themselves as filmmakers.
They've moved away from the usual pop culture parade that's more
costume catalog than cinema ("I'm Miley Cyrus!", "I'm Iron
Man!", "I'm Britney Spears!" -- all typical dialogue from their
previous films, as lookalikes parade onto the screen only to
have cows or meteors or whatnot fall on their heads with a bonk,
immediately after their introduc