Didn’t You Get My Message?  Dear Helena,  I recently had 8:30
p.m. dinner plans with a friend. When I called at 8 p.m. to let
him know I was on my way to the restaurant, he asked, “Didn’t
you get my email?” Turns out he had emailed me at 5:30 p.m.
(after I had already left my office) saying he needed to cancel
because he was swamped at work. I know sometimes cancellations
are unavoidable, but isn’t it rude to do it via after-hours
email at the last minute? And are work obligations a sufficient
excuse to cancel plans that were made a week before?—Solo Diner
Dear Solo Diner,  Hairdressers require 24 hours notice if you
have to cancel. That way, they can use your slot to see another
client. You should treat a friend with the same respect. In
fact, you should treat your friend like a celebrity stylist who
is in town for 48 hours. In other words, only bag if you
absolutely have to.  “Have tos” involving your job fall into two
categories: curveballs and softballs. Most people will not
resent that you cancel if you