Silly, Frivolous Jokes About Melky Cabrera  Jake Roth-US
PRESSWIRE - Presswire  If it seems like Melky Cabrera was too
good to be true, it's because he was.  Melky Cabrera seemed too
perfect. The costumes, the All-Star Game MVP, becoming a fan
favorite ... it was all too good to be true. It seemed like the
whole story was contrived in a focus group. And that makes me
think of Poochie.  If you're not a Simpsons hound, none of this
will make sense. But I'm not apologizing for that. You're
probably a horrible person.  Lincecum: Um, excuse me sir. The
thing is, there's not really anything wrong with the Giants'
roster. It's as good as ever. In a way. But after so many years,
the hitters just can't have the same impact they never had.
Sabean: That's it! That's it, little girl! You've saved the
Giants!  Lincecum: But I'm not …  A lawyer enters the room,
holding papers  Lawyer: Please sign these papers indicating that
you did not save the Giants.  Lincecum: Wait, why are these
titled "Dissolution of 2013 Contract?"