to no longer sympathise with dh's birth mother.(long:
apologies!)  (67 Posts) MillyONaire Tue 19-Nov-13 22:33:24  Dh
(now 44) was adopted at 10 days old. He was never terribly
curious about his birth parents until 9 years ago. He contacted
the adoption agency (we're in Ireland where the "child" has no
right to any but the most basic, unidentifying information) and
spoke with a social worker. She advised him to write to his BM
and she would pass the letter on. He did so, saying that he
really wanted to know his medical history (I think the SW might
have suggested that as a tactic to get her to respond). She did
respond immediately with a letter saying how upset and terrified
she was to get his letter. That if she had committed a crime
she'd have served her time by now and wouldn't have this fear
that he would show up at her doorstep. That she never saw or
held him and was sedated at the time of his birth. Her parents
and siblings knew about him (she was 23 at the time of his
birth, his BF was 30!). She was not