Dear Abby   DEAR ABBY: My father died eight years ago. Mother
couldn't afford to bury him at the time, so he was cremated. Mom
asked me to keep his ashes until her time was up so they could
be buried together.  I have had them ever since. It makes me
feel like he is still with me, that I have not totally lost him.
However, over the last year, my brothers and sisters have led my
mother to believe that I won't respect her wishes to have them
buried together when the time comes. She is pressuring me to
bury him NOW. It hurts me that my family could even think I
would take that away from my mother.  To this day, my siblings
say mean things about Dad, claiming he was a "terrible" father
and husband. I'm a lot younger than the rest of them, so it's
possible I never saw the bad side of him. The father I knew was
a caring, loving man, and it drives me crazy to hear my siblings
speak ill of him. They don't remember his birthday, the date of
his death or even how long ago it was.  Abby, I don't know what
to do. If I go