Friday, July 22, 2011  Lose-Lose Situation  There's a whole
laundry list of taboo comments or actions I can't handle. They
get under my skin or anger me. I used to be one of the easiest
people to talk to (as in, no one ever used to offend me) and now
I've become the most fragile person in the room.  Maybe my
hypersensitivity and constant thought processing of losing
Andrew forces me to develop this assumption that all people are
uncomfortable or nervous around me. They might be. They might
not be. Either way, I feel like a buzzkill most of the time in
social settings. I used to be fun, social, and interested in all
the details. Now I feel like my interest and attention span has
dropped exponentially.  Here's the tricky part. People still
live their lives and, shockingly, still get pregnant and have
babies after I did. After Andrew was conceived, grown, born,
died. People all around me are experiencing their first
pregnancies and the births of their first babies. Babies they
get to keep. What a novel concept.