Sunday, March 18, 2012  Case Study  Subject: White male, 57,
although if you'd asked him at noon he'd have suggested 77 and
if you had watched him climb the stairs an hour earlier, 97.
Subject has a charlie-horsed left quadricep, bruised right
ribcage, aching everything, and a nagging suspicion that his
body has evolved beyond the playing of kid's games. Now if only
his mind would. Competitive soccer at 8:00am is hard on old
bodies.  Status: Subject is lying on the living room couch with
no intention of rising until his body stops aching or mid-spring
- whichever comes first. He plans to flip back and forth between
recorded Champions League games and live NCAA basketball for the
next twelve hours, feeling fairly confident that he has enough
energy to press the jump button on the DirecTV remote for that
long. A pre-noon anesthetic Newcastle brown ale sits on the
coffee table and the manly scent of BENGAY fills the air.
Stimulus: The cell phone rings. If it's not sitting within easy
reach - next to the Newcast