Today in Totally Shocking Vatican Facts  [Content note: rape,
dismissal of survivors, instutional abuse.]  Here are some
totally shocking facts that emerged today about the Vatican!
One: It's secretive!   Two: It's shitty at being secretive!
Three: It's shitty at doing media!  ...the Vatican has sought to
satiate the army of accredited journalists flowing into Rome
with brief glimpses behind the conclave curtain. On Monday, the
Vatican showed a video of cardinals sitting, standing and
reading in the theater where the congregations are held. On
Tuesday, the feature presentation was a silent film with a
camera panning over the three urns that will contain ballots
during the election.  The video, which had the disembodied hands
of a home shopping network presentation and the glacial pace of
a Michelangelo Antonioni film, was accompanied by a Vatican
press release explaining the significance and artistry of the
containers. (“These are treated with a light patina which
underlines the various chromatics of the b