'Real Housewives of OC' Recap: Let Them Not Eat Cake  Jun 20,
2012 | 10:25am EDT  ALTOnce upon a time in a kingdom far far
away (well, not that far if you live in California), there lived
the queen of all the Dwarves and she lived in a granite quarry.
Her name was Heather, and she had long black hair and was cursed
at birth with a ladybeard that she shaved every morning. In the
quarry she had all the little workers carve out a huge palace of
burnished stone. One day an Evil Queen (who will once and
forever be played by Andy Cohen) declared that Heather must
throw a party for all the princesses in the realm so that they
could come and do battle and only the victorious should leave.
Heather's palace was the perfect place, because while it is hard
to get blood out of a stone, it is very easy to wash blood off
of one.  The occasion for the party was that Heather was
changing her last name to Dwarf, which was the last name of her
husband Terry, the king of the Dwarfs. They lived happily in
their rock quarry with t