What Secrets Are Your Children Hiding, New Jersey?  Elementary
school standardized tests are quickly becoming arid wastelands
of proper procedure rather than the lush, experimental adult
imaginariums the test writers would like them to be.  Last week,
post-modern public assessments suffered another crushing
creative blow when it was determined that a question requiring
third-graders to spill a secret was inappropriate.  The Asbury
Park Press reports that the question, which appeared on the
statewide New Jersey Assessment of Skills and Knowledge (ASK),
asked students to reveal a secret they had and to explain why it
was difficult to keep.   The ASK is a standardized test
administered to third through eighth grade students in New
Jersey, designed to measure their abilities in math, science,
and language arts, and also to elicit the playground's hottest
gossip.  Parents—specifically: parents whose children had seen
them commit violent, murderous acts—lost it when they found out
about this question. New Jersey fa