Clarkson on consumerism  Posted by Jeremy Clarkson at 04:53 am
on Tuesday August 14, 2012  My Range Rover has become a
hypochondriac. While driving down the motorway this month, the
dash suddenly flashed up a message saying there was a suspension
fault and I should slow immediately to 30mph. But because it was
not bouncing along like a spacehopper, or slithering along on
its stomach, showering following traffic with sparks, I kept
going.  This made the car very unhappy. "I am ill," it said. "I
must go to a hospital immediately, or I will die." I tried to
explain that it was a case of electrical man flu, but it was no
good. "Ow," it said. "My legs are hurting. Please slow down."
Normally, I would have continued to ignore its cries for help,
but the fact is that my journey would include stops in London,
Sussex, the back end of Dorset, Nottingham, Peterborough and
Banbury, and, frankly, I didn't fancy being marooned in any of
those places if, by some miracle, the car was actually telling
the truth. So, as I wri