Huffpost Comedy The Blog   Waldo Mellon Headshot  The Big Rake
Posted: Updated:  Dear Waldo,  I was in the college library
where I was supposed to meet this girl who never showed up and
I'll admit it, I was gassed out of my mind on this sick weed my
roommate brought back from Jamaica, and I wandered up to the
third floor which I had never been to and there was this
enormous globe of the world. I had heard about it but I never
saw it due to my not liking of geography and my not coming to
the library almost ever. This fucker must be ten feet in
diameter. So I started spinning it because a sign says that's OK
to do if you want to for research purposes. At first I zoned out
on all the colors, but then I started to notice there goes
China, there goes India, Saudi Arabia, Egypt, the Atlantic
ocean, New York, the Great Lakes, Pacific ocean and then it all
started up all over again, China, India, around and around.  And
then I had this amazing thought I admit I probably wouldn't have
had if I wasn't so ripped out of