When love isn't enough   I was twenty when I lost my
virginity...I never really cared for sex when I was growing up;
sure it was always the topic of discussion with the other kids
around me, but I was so afraid of it that I avoided it as much
as I could. I made the golden promise to God as a teenager and
held out for a very long time. I was never good at talking to
guys and still aren't. For personal reasons I become very
offended when they talked to me or tried to come on to me. For
years I have always asked what is wrong with me am I not
attractive? Do guys find me degrading? Do I have a 'Back off'
sign on my forehead?  But then I met this guy (lets call him
Runner) when I was 19. He came to work at the restaurant I was
working at and we became really good friends. I wasn't really
even attracted to him at first but as time progressed so did my
feelings for him. I tried to ignore it because I knew it was
wrong for me to feel that way. He was three years younger then
me and the baby brother of a good friend o