published Thursday, October 31st, 2013  Laugh Lines  Dave
Letterman's Top 1  Top 10 signs you’re a lame spy  10. You fear
heights, loud noises, air travel and enclosed spaces.  9. You
insist on wearing a cape.  8. By day, you work at a hardware
store; by night, you work another shift at the hardware store.
7. Everyone knows you can’t swim.  6. Your only gadget: cuff
links that shoot smaller cuff links.  5. Email address is  4. 10
p.m., enter foreign country; 10:05 p.m., executed for
eswpionage.  3. Insist on being paid in hugs.  2. Ex-girlfriends
call you “003 1/2.”  1. Only have a learner’s-permit-to-kill.
Source: “Late Show With David Letterman”  Suite time  Jean-
Claude Van Damme, Steven Seagal and Arnold Schwarzenegger decide
to go trick-or-treating as musical composers for Halloween. They
go into a costume store and look for masks.  Van Damme grabs the
first costume he sees and says, “I think I’ll go as Beethoven.”
Seagal settles on another and says, “I’ll be Mozart.”
Schwarzenegger looks until he fin