midnight
The intellectual man who kills himself is most often brought to that decision by conviction of his insignificance ; self-pity merges in self-scorn , and the humiliated soul is intolerant of existence . He who survives under like conditions does so because misery magnifies him in his own estimate . It was by force of commiserating his own lot that Edwin Reardon continued to live through the first month after his parting from Amy . Once or twice a week , sometimes early in the evening , sometimes at midnight or later , he haunted the street at Westbourne Park where his wife was dwelling , and on each occasion he returned to his garret with a fortified sense of the injustice to which he was submitted , of revolt against the circumstances which had driven him into outer darkness , of bitterness against his wife for saving her own comfort rather than share his downfall . At times he was not far from that state of sheer distraction which Mrs Edmund Yule preferred to suppose that he had reached . An extraordinary arrogance now and then possessed him ; he stood amid his poor surroundings with the sensations of an outraged exile , and laughed aloud in furious contempt of all who censured or pitied him . On hearing from Jasper Milvain that Amy had fallen ill , or at all events was suffering in health from what she had gone through , he felt a momentary pang which all but determined him to hasten to her side .