one after one
if in this I have darkly erred , taking my heart for my conscience , and mindful only of a selfish wrong ! Oh , surely , no ! Had Richard of York himself lived to know what I have suffered from his unworthy son , -- causeless insult , broken faith , public and unabashed dishonour ; yea , pardoning , serving , loving on through all , till , at the last , nothing less than the foulest taint that can light upon ` scutcheon and name was the cold , premeditated reward for untired devotion , -- surely , surely , Richard himself had said , ` Thy honour at last forbids all pardon ! ''' Then , in that rapidity with which the human heart , once seizing upon self-excuse , reviews , one after one , the fair apologies , the earl passed from the injury to himself to the mal-government of his land , and muttered over the thousand instances of cruelty and misrule which rose to his remembrance , -- forgetting , alas , or steeling himself to the memory , that till Edward 's vices had assailed his own hearth and honour , he had been contented with lamenting them , he had not ventured to chastise . At length , calm and self-acquitted , he rose from his self-confession , and leaning by the open casement , drank in the reviving and gentle balm of the summer air . The state apartments he had left , formed as we have before observed , an angle to the wing in which the chamber he had now retired to was placed . They were brilliantly illumined , their windows opened to admit the fresh , soft breeze of night ; and he saw , as if by daylight , distinct and gorgeous , in their gay dresses , the many revellers within .