midnight
He dreaded his return , and yet he longed for it . When at last Hadrian came in and signed to Master to relieve him of his imperial robes , Antinous slipped behind him , and silently and carefully fulfilled the slave 's office . He felt uneasy and worried , and yet he forced himself to appear in good spirits during supper when he had to sit opposite the Emperor . When , shortly before midnight , Hadrian rose from the table to go up to the watch-tower on the northern side of the palace , Antinous begged to be allowed to carry his instruments for him , and the Emperor , stroking his hair , said kindly : `` You are my dear and faithful companion . Youth has a right to go astray now and then so long as it does not entirely forget the path in which it ought to tread . '' Antinous was deeply touched by these words , and he secretly pressed to his lips a fold of the Emperor 's toga as he walked in front . It was as though he wanted to make amends in advance for the crime he had not yet committed .