ten
o'clock
My father , guided by his passion , or influenced by Madame Roland , threw off his mourning for my mother ere he had worn it three months , under the plea that the sable garb continually reminded him of his loss , and prevented him from regaining his lost tranquillity . His manners to me daily became colder and more estranged , while his perfect indifference concerning me allowed a degree of liberty almost incredible in a person of my age . I met him only at breakfast , after which he returned to his study with Madame Roland , who acted as his secretary , read and answered all his letters , etc. ; that completed , they either walked or drove out together , returning only an hour before dinner , against which , Madame Roland would array herself in an elegant and well-chosen evening dress ; while my father would make a most studiously elaborate toilet , as uncalled for as ill-adapted to his time of life . Occasionally , after dinner , he received a few persons he could not avoid asking to his house , when he would play at tric-trac with Madame Roland until ten o'clock , at which hour he would offer his arm to conduct her to my mother 's apartment , and return to his guests . As for myself , I had unrestrained permission to go where I pleased throughout the whole day . Attended by a servant , I used to take long rides in the extensive woods surrounding the château , and when , as occasionally happened , I felt my spirits unequal to appearing at the dinner-table , not the slightest inquiry was ever made after me , or my absence noticed . '' `` What singular neglect and forgetfulness ! ''