Four AM
I wished futilely for my comm and a nice private channel where I could sling some bullshit and have some slung in my direction , just connect with another human being at a nice , safe remove . They chide me for arguing on the ward , call it belligerence and try to sidetrack me with questions about my motivations , a tactic rating barely above ad hominems in my book . No one to talk to -- the other patients get violent or nod off , depending on their medication levels , and the staff just patronize me . Four AM and I 'm going nuts , hamsters in my mind spinning their wheels at a thousand RPM , chittering away . I snort -- if I was n't crazy to begin with , I 'm sure getting there . The hamsters wo n't stop arguing with each other over all the terrible errors of judgment I 've made to get here . Trusting the Tribe , trusting strangers .