Five
o'clock
She hastened to her kinsman , she broke upon him volubly , she mastered his attention , she hurried him to the door -- the glass-door opening on the garden . I think he looked round ; could I but have caught his eye , courage , I think , would have rushed in to aid feeling , and there would have been a charge , and , perhaps , a rescue ; but already the room was all confusion , the semicircle broken into groups , my figure was lost among thirty more conspicuous . Madame had her will ; yes , she got him away , and he had not seen me ; he thought me absent . Five o'clock struck , the loud dismissal-bell rang , the school separated , the room emptied . There seems , to my memory , an entire darkness and distraction in some certain minutes I then passed alone -- a grief inexpressible over a loss unendurable . _ What _ should I do ; oh ! _ what _ should I do ; when all my life 's hope was thus torn by the roots out of my riven , outraged heart ?