nine o’clock
Oh I am mad , stark-mad , and ready to run on business I die to think her guilty of : tell her how it would grieve her to see me torn and mangled ; to see that hair she loves ruffled and diminish 'd by rage , violated by my insupportable grief , myself quite bereft of all sense but that of love , but that of adoration for my charming , cruel insensible , who is possessed with every thought , with every imagination that can render me unhappy , borne away with every fancy that is in disfavour of the wretched _ Philander _ . Oh _ Melinda _ , write immediately , or you will behold me enter a most deplorable object of pity . When I receiv 'd yours , I fell into such a passion that I forc 'd myself back to _ Dorillus _ his house , left my transports and hurried me to _ Bellfont _ , where I should have undone all : but as I can now rest no where , I am now returning to the meadow again , where I will expect your aid , or die . _ From _ Dorillus _ his cottage , almost nine o'clock . _ * * * * * _ To _ PHILANDER . I must own , my charming _ Philander _ , that my love is now arrived to that excess , that every thought which before but discompos 'd me , now puts me into a violence of rage unbecoming my sex ; or any thing but the mighty occasion of it , love , and which only had power to calm what it had before ruffled into a destructive storm : but like the anger 'd sea , which pants and heaves , and retains still an uneasy motion long after the rude winds are appeas 'd and hush 'd to silence ; my heart beats still , and heaves with the sensible remains of the late dangerous tempest of my mind , and nothing can absolutely calm me but the approach of the all-powerful _ Philander _ ; though that thought possesses me with ten thousand fears , which I know will vanish all at thy appearance , and assume no more their dreadful shapes till thou art gone again : bring me then that kind cessation , bring me my _ Philander _ , and set me above the thoughts of cares , frights , or any other thoughts but those of tender love ; haste then , thou charming object of my eternal wishes , and of my new desires ; haste to my arms , my eyes , my soul , -- but oh , be wondrous careful there , do not betray the easy maid that trusts thee amidst all her sacred store . ' .