The protagonist decides that Yukiko is an auspicious match for him because of a bundled kerchief designed with the titular pattern, and this novel begins in Kamakura at the Engakuji Temple.  
One character in this work claims that common sense is lost on those who are "too much of a man or too much of a woman."  The protagonist's father, his lover's husband, and his father's former mistress all once owned a black bowl that spurred the protagonist to lose his virginity to a woman twenty year older than him.  The protagonist decides that Yukiko is an auspicious match for him because of a bundled kerchief designed with the titular pattern, and this novel begins in Kamakura at the Engakuji Temple.  FTP, name this novel whose protagonist is the bachelor Kikuji Mitani, a work that centers on the traditional Japanese tea ceremony by Yasunari Kawabata.
One character in this work claims that common sense is lost on those who are "too much of a man or too much of a woman."  
{Thousand Cranes} or {Sembazuru} (2) [AH]