Got Bugs? No? Want Bugs? Yes? I have your place -- apparently. \n\nFirst, nice open space, modern but comfortable with a nice atmosphere that isn't too loud or too quiet. \n\nMost importantly, I don't eat bugs voluntarily. I know, call me odd, but it just isn't my thing. Up until my visit to The Parlor, not one single person had made me feel odd or unwarranted in my preference to avoid consuming bugs...ahhh, but all good things must come to an end, even our hopes and dreams of acceptance. \n\nSo, let's stick with the facts: The Smokey (a pizza) and another pizza we ordered were delivered to our table. I quickly noticed something moving on the arugula on top of the Smokey. I attempted to wave it away, thinking it was a fruit fly. My menacing wave had no impact and then I noticed that in fact there were at least 3 or more bugs moving about the arugula. With furious vengeance, I waved at them again. Nothing. OK, not eating this pizza. \n\nSo, I called the waiter over and told him that there were bugs on the pizza. Now this is where our story takes an odd turn (really, we probably have all found a bug in our food at some point, so that's not very odd). \n\nThe waiter responded -- \""well, that's what happens when you don't use pesticides and the food is organic.\"" He then called over another waiter and told her that there were bugs on our pizza. She inspected and concluded that it was so, whereupon she asked: \""would you like something different?\"" \n\nOK. Part of me was expecting the camera crew to emerge, but alas, Candid Camera has long since gone away and instead we were having a great moment in Phoenix restaurant service history. \n\nReally, \""do we want something different?\"" No no, now that we know that the bugs are organic, we will eat that pizza, and heck, order us another with extra bugs. \n\nAnd come on...\""it's organic\""...that's your response? -- I have organic vegetables delivered to me twice a month and I have never had any bugs (granted I do wash my produce). Also, my parents had a large garden when I was younger, no pesticides, and often there were bugs on the vegetables. But, and apparently this is a strange concept, we WASHED them off before eating or serving or storing. \n\nI understand, bugs happen. What I don't understand is the response we received. We truly felt like we were being odd for sending back the pizza. I know that the service level in Phoenix often hovers around a 3 to 4 out of 10, but really, this was a new low. I wasn't expecting the owner to come on out on his or her knees, but I did expect something along the lines of: Oh, I'm very sorry, let me take that away and get you a menu so you can select something else. \n\nSure, eventually there was a rather late \""sorry\"" and an offer of a free dessert, but it was a little late for that. \n\nOn the upside it made for great humor. When the waiter asked us if we had been there before I was half expecting, if we had both said no, she would have said, well that pizza always has bugs on it. And when she asked if we needed help picking something out, I really wanted to say: yes, something without bugs. Unfortunately, I kept the joke to myself. \n\nThe pizza we did eat was OK. The crust lacked flavor and overall it wasn't on par with the likes of Cibo, Humble Pie, or Bianco.\n\nI could get over the bugs, but I have a very hard time swallowing such terrible service. \n\n...wait, maybe there is a camera on me right now as I write this and Candid Camera really has come back...that's the best explanation I have.