30 seconds in this posh place, and I was already excited. They had a coffee bar, the most awesome assortment of bottled beverages I've seen in ANY hookah bar, and the atmosphere--oh my, is it lavish.\n\nIt was a trap!\n\n $15 for a one hose hookah ties the priciest I've ever paid. Wait, what's that? It's $20 just because it's a Saturday night? Now you're pushing it. Well, at least I can split the cost with my friends. Four people to a hookah will be alright, I suppose. A cover charge, you say? Five dollars for each of my friends who didn't order a hookah? Alright, now we're up to $35 for four of us to share a one hose.\n\nBut the nickel-and-diming doesn't end there. You'll also be required to purchase a drink. No hard feelings about the drink itself--the introduction to sparkling Voss ($4) was welcome. But to pay for that after the cover...isn't that a little extreme for a hookah bar?\n\nAfter shelling out what felt like a ripoff, I was still ready to have my mind blown by this place. Too bad I didn't even get to sit on the second floor! I asked, and received no reason why it couldn't be done when my party was the only one in the building. If you ever have the misfortune of coming here, you'll see why that's a big deal--the second floor is the coolest little balcony you'll ever see at at a hookah bar.\n\nSo I finally get the hookah. It looked like an expensive piece, but I was displeased to see instant light coals (low quality) sitting on top. I huffed and I puffed, but could barely muster one iota of smoke. After sucking ash, I complained to the waitress, who was almost clueless about what to do.\n\n15 minutes later, I got my hookah back. It smoked alright...too bad they used the cheapest shisha. Why charge so much when you use such a low quality product? \n\nI can barely even call Harem a hookah bar. I think that's just a front. It's a place to sip coffee and Voss in style, that just happens to serve subpar hookahs on the side. It's the most expensive place of its kind, yet has the worst quality I have ever encountered. One star is too much, and I may never go again...unless they let me smoke on the second floor.