You know the saying \""words can not describe\""? Well, luckily words can describe the atrocities that are to be found at the Diamond Inn. With the exception of the kitschy pink elephant on the front lawn, the rest of the place is a nightmare. \n\nAfter numerous unsuccessful attempts to find a room elsewhere in town we were relegated to visiting dive hotels and motels and unfortunately for us, there was vacancy at the Diamond Inn.\n\nThe Smell\nThe moldy yet chemically smell in the room was absolutely overwhelming. Not just when you walked in, but hours later.\n\nThe Stickyness\nEvery surface was tacky to the touch. Even though the beds were foul, the floor was even more foul. I wound up sleeping in my sleeping bag on top of the bed and later scrubbed out that sleeping bag at a you-wash-it car wash, and it remains suspect.\n\nSecurity\nThe door did not latch, let alone lock. Much of the door jam was missing and there is much evidence of the door being kicked in (by police? pimps? hobos? who knows!).\n\nThe Bathroom\nCross-reference the section on stickyness. There was no top to the toilet tank AND there was an empty beer bottle in the toilet tank. You can't make this up.\n\nThe Television\nWow. I can't write this without laughing. All of the channels were exactly the same. Turn it to three and you see the same video as you see on six, twenty-two, etc. The audio was a loud hum, no actual audio. Oh, what was on the tv you ask? Why XXX porn, and not just any XXX porn, but a best-of that only showed what I'm going to call the \""grand finale\"" for Yelp. You can call it by more raunchy terms. One or two minute clips all complied together. \n\nSummary\nI'm lucky to be alive and disease-free after my stay at the Diamond Inn. It was so bad it was funny. Kind of.