

Benefits And Challenges Of Using A Surrogate Mother

What To Consider When Choosing A Surrogate Mother

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If you are having difficulty conceiving, you are not alone. The number of reproductively-challenged couples is increasing, and with it is the number of options available to these couples. A surrogate mother may allow you to have a child with a genetic link to you, even if you cannot carry it to term yourself. But whether it is arranged through an agency or is privately negotiated, finding a surrogate mother is a legally intricate, expensive, and emotionally intense process. It is important you understand that, in order to be successful, the process involves a huge amount of money, time and patience.

Why Surrogacy?
Modern medicine has made several options available to infertile couples and single men and women, who would like to have a family, including adoption, egg donation, sperm donation, traditional surrogacy, and gestational surrogacy.

There are several reasons why a couple might opt for surrogacy. The woman may not be able to carry a child herself because she has had a hysterectomy, because of abnormalities in her uterus, or because of health conditions that might make it dangerous for her to be give birth or be pregnant. Surrogacy is an attractive option for many reproductively-challenged couples because, unlike adoption, surrogacy allows a genetic link between the intended parents and the child.

What is Surrogacy?
It was 1983 when the first infant was conceived from in vitro fertilization (IVF) in the United States. Since then, the use of IVF and related procedures has considerably increased.
When a couple chooses surrogacy, typically a surrogate mother conceives through artificial insemination by the man’s sperm. Usually, the man would be the child’s biological father. This traditional surrogacy procedure is called a “full surrogacy” because the surrogate’s eggs and uterus have been used. With traditional surrogacy, there is a genetic tie between the child and the father, but not the intended mother. Medical expense for traditional surrogacy is substantially less than those for gestational surrogacy.

While traditional surrogacy is the most common type of surrogacy, recently a more advanced treatment has made it possible for a surrogate mother to carry a baby that is an entirely biological child of the reproductively challenged couple. Gestational surrogacy, offers the possibility of a genetic link to both intended parents because it involves harvesting eggs from the intended mother or a donor. In this case, an embryo is conceived by using in vitro fertilization or a similar method. The egg is fertilized outside of the surrogate mother’s body. Thus, it is possible for a surrogate mother to carry a donated embryo to term.

After the child is born, the surrogate mother then gives the baby to the couple and terminates her parental rights. The intended parents must establish their legal parentage because the baby will be registered as the child of the surrogate mother whether she is genetically related to the baby or not.
While private arrangements do take place, arrangements between surrogate mothers and couples are usually set up through agencies. The couple can be very involved in the pregnancy and after the baby’s delivery, the surrogate mother commonly remains a part of the baby’s life. Also, the infertile couple often pays the surrogate mother’s expenses, which could include the cost of travel, maternity clothes and loss of earnings, as well as any legal and agency fees.

How Long Does it Take?
Because of the complicated emotional and legal aspects of surrogacy, it could take months or even years for finding a surrogate mother who is healthy, that you feel you can trust, and who is compatible with your needs. Then, after the arrangement is completed, the surrogate mother and the couple would typically try to conceive for about three to four months, although it could take longer.

Advantages of Surrogacy
For a couple who cannot conceive otherwise, a surrogate mother gives them a chance to parent a child who is their genetic offspring. If the couple sets up an open arrangement, they can be closely involved in all the fine points of their baby’s gestation and may even be present for the birth of their child.

Disadvantages of Surrogacy
Besides complications that come with medical procedures such as full surrogacy and IVF, surrogacy is controversial and can be legally complicated. Also, as the nature of the treatment is contentious, some clinics do not support surrogacy. For this reason, it may take time to find a clinic that meets your needs.
Furthermore, some surrogate mothers face challenging psychological and emotional difficulties about letting the baby go. So, besides having the usual worries that a couple experiences when waiting for a pregnancy to reach full-term safely, couples using surrogacy as a treatment often worry about legal complications, controversial ethics, as well as the possibility that the surrogate mother will change her mind.

Other factors that are grounds for discussion between a couple and their surrogate might include matters such as antenatal tests, and how to manage the pregnancy, labor and delivery.

What to Consider When Choosing a Surrogate Mother
Because of the many factors to consider, many people utilize the services of an agency when looking for a surrogate mother. Agencies often have a lengthy application process for the egg donor or possible surrogate mother that requires her to examine her own thoughts and views about the course ahead of her. Additionally, the medical history about herself and her family is also scrutinized.

Besides taking into account the genetic factors involved with choosing a surrogate mother, the complex emotional and legal nature of surrogacy makes it imperative for couples to understand their surrogate’s personality, emotional needs, and any other expectations that she might have. Additionally, couples considering surrogacy should also analyze their own views regarding multiple birth, selective reduction, and termination of pregnancy. It is also vital for couples to have an idea of the type and amount of contact they would like to have with the surrogate mother. The intended parents must also consider their preferences regarding attending medical appointments with their surrogate, the delivery, as well as other matters of personality and personal preference that would fashion their relationship with their surrogate.
What Does it Cost?
Costs that couples considering surrogacy must take into account includes insurance, background checks, visits to the fertility clinic for the surrogate mother as well as the egg donor, if you use one. Other surrogacy costs that need to be considered include OB/GYN visits after the surrogate mother becomes pregnant, medical co-pays and deductibles, legal fees and medication. Couples may also need to purchase medical insurance to cover the pregnancy if the surrogate mother’s insurance does not cover it.

Other expenses the intended couple should bear in mind: psychological evaluation fees for the surrogate mother and her spouse; a maternity clothes allowance; and other miscellaneous fees.

Finding a surrogate mother is complex and can be costly. It is important that you discuss options with your partner prior to obtaining information on surrogacy. Make sure to gather information on the subject and consider the concept of using a surrogate mother in light of your ethical views on the matter. Finally, consider the financial issues that accompany surrogacy. Surrogacy can be costly and you may have to use credit cards or loans to pay for the process.

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