Although bladder cancer is one of the most common cancers in the United States, it isn’t one you hear a lot about. Because it’s not frequently talked about, people diagnosed with bladder cancer often feel isolated. This not only affects them, but those around them as well.

Urostomy: Understanding This Bladder Cancer Operation

Few people understand the consequences of bladder cancer better than Ben and Roni Olsen of Denver, Colo. Mr. Olsen was diagnosed with bladder cancer in late 1979 and was treated for it. After two years of clean exams, Mr. Olsen developed a very aggressive tumor in his bladder and needed bladder surgery. The operation is called a radical cystectomy with an ileal conduit urinary diversion. During this procedure, the ureters, the tubes that normally connect the kidneys to the bladder, are disconnected from the bladder and attached to the small intestine; they are then pulled through a stoma, a small opening that the surgeon creates in the abdominal wall, so that urine drains into a urostomy bag.

After Bladder Cancer Surgery: Issues of Intimacy

Roni Olsen, caregiver and author of Bladder Cancer, Urostomy and Impotence, says her husband was a bit self-conscious at first, "but mostly irritated by the whole ordeal since he had always been concerned about his health and active lifestyle." It’s not surprising that intimate relationships and your sexuality are major concerns if you’ve had bladder surgery and wear a urostomy bag. For both sexes, the key is often attitude and your approach to intimacy.

If you’re a woman and want to have children, unless there are other reasons why you can’t get pregnant, the urostomy shouldn’t be an issue. Men may experience impotence, but your doctor can talk to you about the options available for treating impotence. Some people worry about what their children will think of the urostomy; speaking to them truthfully and in a matter-of-fact way often goes a long way with kids.

Barring any complications, once you’ve healed and know how to manage your urostomy, it's up to you to find ways to get back into the swing of your life. Going back to work and resuming normal activities after bladder cancer is usually possible. That includes activities like skiing or even swimming. Contact sports, however, are normally out because of potential damage to the stoma.

After Bladder Cancer Surgery: Taking Precautions

Even traveling shouldn’t be a problem. Of course, you have to make sure you bring enough supplies with you, and have them in your carry-on bag if you’re flying. Ben Olsen learned this the hard way on a trip to Hawaii. As Roni Olsen wrote in her book, "Several Mai Tais later and also several hundred miles over the Pacific, he was in serious trouble. By the time the plane landed, his fun time had turned to agony and his pouch was over-distended." Luckily, his luggage was there and retrieved quickly.

Since that episode, Olsen always keeps his supplies at hand. "Ben tries to keep a clean catheter kit in the glove compartment of the car all of the time," says Mrs. Olsen. "Any time he uses commercial transportation, all of his catheters and urostomy supplies go into his carry-on luggage."

There are people in all walks of life living with urostomies, and those around them have no idea. For many, going about their daily lives is a sign that things are getting back to normal, that they’ve overcome their cancer, and best of all that their emotional outlook is positive again.