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How to Be Polite in Italy

Maybe you are going to stay with an Italian family? Or just going to Italy? Italy's customs and values are a lot like those of other European countries, but there are a few differences. The four most important things to Italians are family, friends, religion and good self presentation.


  1. 1
    On dressing. Never dress poorly - casual, daily clothes should be elegant and stylish, and women should always wear at least a little makeup and a piece of jewellery. If invited to a special event, always wear your best clothes. Italians also often follow the latest trends in fashion.
  2. 2
    On going to someone else's home. If you are invited to somebody else's home, dress well. If the invitation says informal, or it is un-informal occasion, you will still be expected to wear stylish clothes (see step 1) - casual, but stylish. However, over-dressing for an occasion is seen as vulgar. You should arrive on time, though being ten or fifteen minutes late won't cause any upset. When you arrive, give your attention to the host - to immediately go off and talk to other guests or sitting down is very impolite. Also, bring a gift with you (see step 4). Note that when you are invited to an acquaintance's home for dinner, you are expected to return the invitation (though a week or two later.)
  3. 3
    On meeting. First impressions are particularly important to Italians. Greetings should be warm and enthusiastic, yet not informal. In Southern Italy a greeting will usually be a kiss on each cheek, whilst in the North this is reserved for close friends and family; otherwise, a handshake while suffice, but remember to make eye-contact. Also remember that it is rude to call somebody by their first name unless they give you express permission.
  4. 4
    On gift giving. It is possible you will want to give a gift. Flowers are not as common a gift in Italy as in other countries, though they are still given - if you do want to give flowers, avoid Chrysanthemums, which are seen as funeral flowers, red flowers,which are only to be given to a lover, and yellow flowers, which symbolise anger. In Italy gifts are thought of as quite important, and an Italian will spend time looking at your gift - to put a gift away in a corner shortly after receiving it is thought of as very disrespectful. Therefore, it is best to buy a good quality gift, such as nice chocolates or an expensive wine. Do not wrap it in black or purple paper, as this is seen as unlucky.
  5. 5
    On dining. Only sit down once you have been invited to do so, and only get up to leave the table when the host does so. Take small portions - if you want more, you can go back for a second helping. As in most European countries, the knife is held in the right hand and the fork in the left. When eating you should remember not to make a mess of the plate, and not leave more than a very small amount once you are finished. Offer the host to help take the dishes away (though they will usually decline, it is a polite formality).
  6. 6
    On jokes. It is thought of as bad taste to tell rude or offensive jokes, or tell any jokes on sad occasions.
  7. 7
    On respect. Child or adult, you should show respect to elders.

Community Q&A

Add New Question
  • Can you use chopsticks in Italy?
    wikiHow Contributor
    You can if you are in a place where they might be easily found, such as an Asian restaurant. Otherwise, chopsticks may not even be available to use.
  • Do I need to wear makeup?
    tamara gerigojan
    That really depends on what kind of vacation you want to go on. If you want to backpack through Europe, it wouldn't be the best idea if you had makeup on because you would be out in nature. If you want to travel around a city, then you should wear what you prefer. And remember, you are beautiful the way that you are no matter what.
  • What if I'm judged by my clothing?
    Dahlia Gillespie
    Italy is a very touristy place, Italians are used to seeing people from other cultures. You will probably get around without any problem. Judging can happen anywhere in the world, even if you are wearing clothes that are totally normal to you. Just don't worry about it; wear what you like.
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    • If you are eating a food that doesn't require a knife, such as pasta or risotto, then don't use one - scoop it up with your fork, but elegantly
    • Invitations are usually sent through mail and, if it is a formal event, handwritten; only if you are having a get-together between close friends or family should you invite somebody through the internet or other such communication devices
    • If you are given a gift, open it immediately and pay it much attention
    • Women are much more likely to make toasts than men - if the host makes a toast, the guest of honour is expected to return it, so if this is you, do so
    • If you are going to a church make sure to always cover up your shoulders, back, chest and knees; men are not to wear hats in church


    • It is impolite to ask a woman her age
    • Don't be surprised if you are given a "social card" - it is like a business card but slightly bigger, and will have the giver's address and phone number printed on it
    • You will probably drink small portions of red wine with your meal
    • Italians will often judge you, and make assumptions about your social class, by the clothes you wear
    • Don't eat chips and olives, and other snack foods, with your hands - use your fork

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