Wednesday, 6 January 2010

the most important skills in communication is listening.

the most important skills in communication is listening.


One of the most important skills in communication is listening. How hard can that be? If you listen properly it can be almost exhausting. It can also be a precious gift you give to another. If a person feels properly listened to, they feel understood and less alone because someone has taken the time to really care. Listening, really listening, involves several aspects.

* Listening to the meaning, not just the words. To show you understand the meaning, you may want to repeat back what you thought you heard the person tell you but in your own words. Don't get discouraged if they say, "No, no, what I am saying is…" because this means the other person wants you to understand and you're getting there.
* Try and imagine yourself in the other person's position - this can help you understand better.
* Don't butt in or talk about something similar that happened to you. It takes attention away from the other person and puts the focus on you.
* Your body language is important too, it shows that you're listening. Face the person. If you look out the window or doodle on paper they'll feel you're not really listening. Let them know you're still listening by nodding and saying words that show you are listening, like, "yes", "uhuh" or "go on".

Communicating well means telling each other what you think - the good and the not so good, but doing it in a non-blaming way if it's the not so good.


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