Why Can’t We Maintain Eye Contact While Talking

Eye Contact

Eye Contact

Eye Contact, I have this problem and its very serious others may not have noticed it but I am more than concern about it. most of the times when I speak with someone and through talking I think my eyes don’t focus they wonder I am speaking but my eyes are not looking at the person instead I look sideways or downwards.

I have heard it so much that not looking at the person while talking is a sign of lying. But I wondered sometimes that if I am telling truth then why people think I am lying just because I don’t focus on them while talking. I have read it somewhere that trying to make eye contact when talking actually is disruptive for your thinking.

Eye Contact

Once I was reading somewhere that maintain eye contact while speaking makes it harder for you to focus on what you are saying. In simple words, you speak thoughtfully when your focus is not a person but something else. I have noticed that when I look away during a conversation I explain my point clearly but when I focus on the person in front of me I forget what I am saying.

I fumble more and just couldn’t complete the sentence. I have to think harder for making sense of what I am saying.

Eye Contact

Why eye contact is important

It’s no surprise that when you avoid eye contact you think more clearly. As an infant, we are taught to make eye contact and we learn through eye contact when we were just a baby of few months. So scientists now say that to prove logic of your point one must have to make strong eye contact.

Eye Contact, It’s a study that infants learn more through adults’ eye contact than his other movements. We exercise these movements to understand what others are saying to us. There can be other factors which influence our behavior regarding eye contact.

It’s different for people that how much or how little eye contact they chose to make. During constructive sessions or during presentations we need to make eye contact that is very important. Reduced eye contact can be seen as an embarrassment, shyness and shame maybe they are afraid of the social anxiety. This is true we increase eye contact with someone we like or admire or someone on whom we think we have more power.

“ Never make eye contact while eating its weird”

Effects of eye contact

I have read several studies on eye contact and each of them said that eye contact is not important for conservation. But one study shows that eye contact is good for memory, you remember more when you make eye contact.

When you address your colleagues or your students it’s important to make eye contact

Eye Contact

because it makes them alert and they listen more carefully what you are saying and remember it too. Eye contact is beneficial for us and also to those around us, Eye Contact.

It’s a fact that eye contact makes people honest and they tell truth. When other person makes eye contact during the conversation you become self-aware and you tune into your thoughts and behaviors. Feelings also affected due to eye contact.

You feel intimate when you are under the gaze of someone. Maintain eye contact is the main source of increased attraction.

Reasons for not maintaining eye contact

  • For some unknown reason, you get nervous while talking
  • You feel uncomfortable under someone’s gaze

Eye Contact

  • Sometimes people are very weird
  • They make you feel shy or less confident
  • Maybe you have sudden urge to turn or move away from them
  • You feel awkward when someone continues to watch you
  • You feel like a loser
  • You want to end the conversation but another person is continuously talking

Your communication must be effective, you can covey your message non verbally also but try to use some action so that other person can understand you better like body language and your voice tone. No doubt eye contact is very important to win an argument. Connections are formed due to eye contact. Most people fall in love because of this eye contact.

It’s a saying that eyes never lie you can but not your eyes. For intimacy, eye contact is very important but I am quite shy and my wife complains a lot about it. I am trying very hard to maintain eye contact but failed sometimes. I am human I am trying and hoping to overcome this problem soon.

One fun fact about maintaining eye contact is you can creep some out easily through it ….

I know too little eye contact is boring for some and they think of us plain and ordinary a person who has zero confidence but we choose if we want to talk being comfortable with something and that is our right but this society has its own norms Eye Contact.

Conversation without eye contact is like fries without ketchup, no flavor. Sometimes other people feel like you are not paying attention to what they are saying and they feel insecure. To look people in the eyes should be not too little more too much should be in the moderate amount of time.  Some time back I was very bad at eye contact now I am improving.

Eye Contact

I can look into other person eyes but not too much. Let me tell you some rules of making eye contact:

  • Try to make eye contact one-third of the time of talking
  • When you are listening to them make two third time of the eye contacting
  • Try to focus on 3-4 seconds
  • Girls make more eye contact than boys
  • Observe another person how much he/she is making eye contact and follow it.

Hope these tips help you improve your problem like its helping me. Romantic situation automatically makes you more eye contact than normally you do. Practice making man perfect so do it Eye Contact.

“you only have one life, make most of it”


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