Weapons Garrote, Briefcase Gun, MAC-10, Exploding Cigar
Origin United States
Activities Covert and paramilitary ops
Spying and oppression (post-9/11)
Service 1947-Present
Battle Status Won vs KGB
Experts Mike Baker (former CIA agent)
Frank Dowse (former Defense Intelligence)


The CIA. From left to right: 001, 002, 003, 005, and 004.

"Whether it was Vietnam, whether it was post-World-War-II, whether it was Afghanistan, the military is coming in behind us, special forces. You need to gather as much intelligence as possible to support that force." - Mike Baker, former CIA agent

The CIA, America's elite core of espionage artists, fighting an undercover war around the globe;

The KGB, Communist Russia's secret police whose reign of terror left nations marred with blood.


In June 13, 1942 the Office of Strategic Services was founded during WWII. Much of its activities were based on intelligence gathering and supporting rebel armies against the Axis Powers. In September 20, 1945 with WWII at an end, the agency dissolved.

However with the rise of Cold War tensions, the need for an intel agency was revived. The Central Intelligence Agency, or CIA, was founded as part of the National Security Act of 1947. Its primary functions are to collect information about foreign governments, corporations, and individuals, and to advise public policymakers. The agency also conducts covert operations and paramilitary operations at the request of the President of the United States, and exerts foreign political influence through its Special Activities Division.

CIA logo

Executive Order 11905 on February 18, 1976, by President Gerald R. Ford was implemented to limit the power of the CIA by banning CIA led political assassinations. However some historians and journalists argue that the CIA and allied associates still perform such assassinations. The Israeli Commandos (directly funded and supported by the USA) openly assassinate supporters or members of Hamas and Hezbollah. There have also been multiple political assassination attempts against the nuclear and political figures of Iran; including a failed assassination attempt on the current Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei in 1981. Regan attempted to bring back the option of political assassination with Executive Order 12333. Groups and individuals classified as criminals or terrorists by the US Government have no such protection; as most infamously seen with the assassination of Bin Laden in Operation Neptune Spear on May 2, 2011 (PKT).


  • Years active - 1947 - Present
  • Height - 5'11"
  • Weight - 180 lbs
  • Missions - Covert and paramilitary ops
    Unethical spying and surveillance (post-9/11)
  • Symbol - Eagle (in CIA logo)


CIA Weapon Kills
Close Range: Garrote 1
Mid Range: Briefcase Gun 95
Long Range: Ingram MAC-10 413
Explosive Weapons: Exploding Cigar 41

Simulated BattleEdit

BlueBlueBlueBlueBlue CIA

RedRedRedRedRed KGB

A CIA Agent (001) is walking up to an embassy of the USSR carrying a briefcase, while a nearby CIA Agent (002) keeps a lookout with binoculars in a nearby van. Behind CIA 001, a Russian KGB Agent (001) shadows him as they walk into the Embassy.

Inside, CIA 001 is making a business transaction with KGB 002, a double agent who sells off a roll of camera film for the briefcase full of US currency. With their business done, CIA 001 offers KGB 002 a cigar whom happily obliges. CIA 001 smirks as KGB 002 takes his last puff and the cigar explodes, blowing off KGB 002's face.Reddead CIA 001 slips the film into his vest pocket, grabs the briefcase and leaves the office.

In the lobby of the embassy, two KGB Agents (003 and 004) are shooting a film with a camera, while a nearby CIA Agent (003) sits around listlessly with his briefcase. KGB 003 turns to face CIA 001 with the camera and shoots him at point-blank range.Bluedead Seeing this, CIA 003 immediately stands up and shoots KGB 003 with his suitcase.Reddead As KGB 003 falls down dead, KGB 004 pulls out her silenced Skorpion sub-machine gun and fires at CIA 003, shooting him in the back and killing him as he dives behind cover.Bluedead KGB 004 kneels down to the deceased CIA 001 and steals the camera film as CIA Agents 004 and 005 storm the lobby with silenced MAC 10 sub-machine guns. KGB 004 gets to an elevator and fires out from cover, impeding the CIA agents' pursuit as the elevator doors close.

Inside the elevator, KGB 004 inspects the film and puts it into a Dead Drop Spike. The elevator doors open and KGB 004 comes face-to-face with KGB 001 with both their guns raised at each other. Recognizing each other, the agents lower their weapons and go leave as KGB 004 gives 001 the Dead Drop Spike. Outside the embassy, KGB Agent 005 awaits his fellow agents, unaware that he is being watched by CIA 002 from across the street.

Back inside the embassy, KGB 001 and 004 are making their way through a kitchen when CIA 004 and 005 catch up to them. The CIA agents open fire, wounding KGB 001 as KGB 004 fires back, shoving the wounded 001 agent out of the crossfire. CIA 004 and 005 dive for cover down behind the counter and move their way up with 005 pushing a serving dolly in front of her. As 005 nears the end of the counter, KGB 004 runs up and gets behind the other side of the dolly, pushing objects down on CIA 005. Both agents stand up and struggle to shoot each other, but KGB 004 gets the upper hand and kills the female CIA agent.Bluedead While she is still standing, CIA 004 pops out and quickly dispatches the femme fatale with a short burst of machine gun fire.Reddead

Meanwhile, the wounded KGB 001 agent makes his way upstairs, while CIA 004 pursues closely, following his bloody trail to a nearby restroom. As CIA 004 prepares to inspect a stall, KGB 001 jumps out and engages the agent, clicking his heels together and unsheathing a shoe knife. The KGB agent kicks the CIA agent in his groin, cutting up the tender organs, but CIA 004 manages to retaliate by plunging the MAC into his stomach and firing, killing KGB 001.Reddead As KGB 001 slumps against the wall, CIA 004 reaches into his pockets and takes the dead drop spike. He attempts to open it, but fails to open it the correct way and it explodes, sending metal fragments into his body.Bluedead

Outside, KGB 005 hears the explosion and gets out of his car, stuffing his Skorpion into his coat as he enters the embassy. Across the street, CIA 002 sees the careless agent exiting his car and leaves the safety of his van.

Inside the embassy, KGB 005 sees the carnage caused by the now deceased CIA and KGB agents. With the film roll destroyed and the CIA killed in action, the KGB agent returns to his car, unaware that CIA 002 is lying in wait. As KGB 005 attempts to start his car, CIA 002 pops out from the back seat with a garrote wire and strangles the KGB agent. The agent struggles helplessly as the wire slicing into his neck, slicing the throat and jugular, as the agent slumps into the seat and bleeds out..Reddead His job finished, the CIA agent exits the car, wiping his bloodied hands with a towel and adjusting his scarf as he walks away.

Expert's OpinionEdit

According to the experts, the main reason for the CIA's victory, despite the brutality of the KGB, was the reliability of their firearms in the MAC-10 (which was a bigger caliber and had a faster rate of fire than the Scorpion) and briefcase gun. 


  • Before Nelson Mandela was president of South Africa his anti-apartheid movement was seen as an act of terrorism by South Africa and its allies and Mandela was one of the most wanted men in the world. In 1962 the CIA located Mandela, leading to his 27 year long arrest.
  • The CIA has been criticized for assisting future enemies of the USA, normally to fight another enemy. In WWII the predecessor of the CIA the Office of Strategic Services assisted the Viet Minh under Ho Chi Minh; future leader of the Viet Cong. In the Iraq-Iran War, Saddam was given chemical weapons and other supplies to use against Iran. In the Soviet-Afghan War, Osama Bin Laden was assisted by the CIA to remove the Soviets. The 1980s dictator of Panama, Manuel Noriega, was initially supported by the CIA until they discovered his ties to the Medellin Cartel and deposed him in the US invasion of Panama: 20 December 1989 – 31 January 1990.
    • The USA supported Pol Pot during the Vietnamese occupation of Cambodia; despite being aware of the genocides committed by the Khmer Rouge.
  • The CIA has been accused of poisoning and killing Hugo Chavez as well as dozens of other political leaders. However this also means the CIA have been accused of many other conspiracies.
  • The USA has been accused of several crimes against their own people. This includes; poisoning beer during prohibition, secretly drugging Americans to view the effects of certain drugs, and sterilizing undesirable groups. These policies were estimated to have effected 1000s of Americans, but never expanded to a national level.
  • The CIA have assisted military coups that removed popular democratic leaders; Iranian Prime Minister Mohammad Mosaddegh in August 1953, Guatemalan President Jacobo Árbenz in June 1954, and Chilean President Salvador Allende on September 11, 1973.
  • JFK (the same president who authorized the Bay of Pigs invasion and attempted overthrows or assassinations of Fidel Castro) openly admitted that president Fulgencio Batista (whom Castro overthrew in a popular uprising) was an example of disastrous US foreign policy that supported one of the worst dictators in the world.
  • Other CIA weapons [1]

  • At about four minutes, this simulated battle is the longest sim battle ever filmed (not including the episode with fictional characters, Vampires vs. Zombies).
  • This episode marks the first time where women were directly involved in the battle.
  • The CIA is one of the six warriors without some catchphrase or battle cry in the simulation's end.