Exploring the “why” of Behaviors

December 24th, 2010

Something to consider during the holiday season, when you and your child have the opportunity of time, is the exploring of behaviors. From all the books and articles I have read, one thing is certain. Children communicate through their behaviors.
If we are not attuned to this idea, we can make the mistake of being punitive. In moments of tension you and your child may be feeling too stressed to have a conversation. Give yourself time to take a breath. Think first if you can trust yourself to be present for your child in order to help them explore their feelings. Think secondly if there is an activity you both enjoy that allows you to create an atmosphere for a conversation. Asking your child how you can make things better may be a way to open the door for a conversation. Listen and validate their feelings. Provide assurance you want to help. Making suggestions and asking for ideas will show your child the love and acceptance of a nurturing relationship. Utilizing an activity you both enjoy can create a lasting positive memory of connection. These are a few examples:
Taking a walk or a drive together.
Playing Jenga together.
Coloring together.
Taking turns tossing candy into a container.
Going fishing together.
Flying a kite together.
Making cookies together.