Web Surfing: Surfers' Guide To The Galaxy

Kenneth Carter | By Kenneth Carter | The Birmingham News
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on February 15, 2009 at 5:30 AM, updated February 15, 2009 at 5:33 AM
Poor Pluto had its status as planet revoked in 2006. What's a heavenly body to do to get some respect?
It's always tough to get demoted, especially when it's done to you at no fault of your own. So it has happened to Pluto, the lonely astronomical body at the tail end of our solar system. It's very sad to look at events calendars that announce on Wednesday, the "former" planet Pluto was discovered. How humiliating. Well, Pluto, you'll always be a planet to me. Let's surf the Web for more astronomical fun.



A nebula is a big cloud of gas left over after a star dies. It's also a cool place to hide from genetically engineered madmen bent on revenge. Nebulas are really quite beautiful. They should be since they're called the flowers of the cosmos. If you want to see just how amazing these phenomena are, then head to this Hubble site for the Nebula Collection. Sounds a little like something you'd buy from the Franklin Mint.

No, I'm not talking about the Pointer Sisters, but I guess as long as I'm using '80s references, the singers who made the neutron a dance can apply. Neutron stars are the result of a dying star, and they are thought to be the most dense objects in the galaxy. If you think you've got weight problems then pity the poor neutron star. A sugar cube-size piece weighs 100 million tons. Find out more on the neutron star at this site. It's heavy. (I believe that's three '80s nods now.)

The big deal on almost every astronomer's plate is looking for the first official Earth-like planet orbiting another star. Most of the extrasolar planets discovered so far make Jupiter look like a soccer ball. As of now, there are four ways to discover a planet. To date, there is no way to get to said planets, unless you know of a military bunker housing a big metal doughnut left here by aliens pretending to be Egyptian gods. Learn the four ways and more about exoplanets at this site.

I still have a little hearing loss from '80s arcades. But, ah, the memories of being a lonely geek.
ASTEROIDS Asteroids are big floating hunks of rock that mostly fall in an orbit between Mars and Jupiter. Every now and then, one likes to stray, sometimes coming very close to destroying all life on Earth. This site makes me wonder what all the fuss is about. Asteroids are easy to blow up. Don't believe me? Then entertain the notion with a blast from the past by playing Asteroids. Have fun, but make sure your leg warmers are pulled up high before you begin.

These giant, dirty snowballs of the galaxy just float around bored until they get close to the sun, then they really show off. The most famous comet is, of course, Halley's Comet, last seen zipping around our sun in 1986. Thanks to pollution though, it wasn't much of a show. You'll have to wait until 2072 to see it again. Yeah, save me a seat -- I'll be 108. But there are other comets looming out there. For more information, head to this site.

No, it's not what Darth Vader puts on his BLTs. That would be Dark 'Maters. I know, stop your groaning. Dark Matter is the theoretical "invisible" stuff in the universe that affects the objects we can see. At this site, see how a bunch of scientists with IQs the size of the national debt have actually mapped out the dark matter. How do they map something that is invisible? Do you think I'd be writing this silly column if I could answer that?

Sheldon and Leonard from CBS's "The Big Bang Theory" are the kings of geekdom. Plus, they wear cool T-shirts.
BIG BANG THEORY Yes, I agree, some of the sites in this column have gotten a little scientifically heavy, even though they are some pretty cool sites if you dig astronomy. So we come to the Big Bang Theory -- that the universe started as a super dense pinpoint of matter that, after a night of partying, threw up what became the known Universe in a massive explosion. But enough of that, just make me laugh, OK? Here's a clip from CBS' "The Big Bang Theory" sitcom as the uber-geeks discuss the birth and death of Spock. Enjoy.

Despite the lack of concrete evidence, many people swear that we are being visited by UFOs. Are they alien spacecraft? Are they some natural unexplained phenomena? Or are they the result of too many whiskey shots on a Saturday night? If you're among the believers, then head to this site for all kinds of "evidence" about UFOs. I was told by my neighbor that we are absolutely not being visited by aliens. He later unhinged his jaw and swallowed a live rat, but isn't that part of the Atkins Diet?

If you've ever witnessed a meteor shower, you know what an amazing fireworks display nature puts on for us. The result of tiny bits of dust striking Earth's atmosphere, the best ones usually occur when our planet travels through the path of a comet. Take a look at this site for a calendar of when to watch the night skies for one of the best light shows anywhere. Pink Floyd music is optional.

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Technology Editor Kenneth Carter