Could you live without birth control?

Betsy Shaw

posted: July 11, 2012, 9:44 am

in: Baby, Pregnant, You and Your Family, Me & My Kids, News, Sex & Relationships, Mom Stories

Up late last night, I stumbled across this video about how easy it is for those of us in industrialized countries to take contraception, the ability to delay, space or avoid pregnancy altogether, for granted.

I’m guilty of this. In the past few months I’ve posted twice about how sick I am of having to use contraception and how I worry it’s making me fat. Woe is me and my tidy two-child family.

The focus of contraception, from a first-world perspective, is often on lifestyle and lifestyle alone. We certainly don’t automatically think of it as something that has the potential to save lives.

According to a release put out by the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, 272,000 maternal deaths are averted worldwide by contraception. A recent study conducted by Johns Hopkins researchers estimates that increased access to contraception globally could decrease maternal deaths by another 30 percent.

Effective contraception is estimated to avert nearly 230 million unintended births each year. Worldwide, roughly 358,000 women and 3 million newborn babies die each year because of complications related to pregnancy and childbirth. Nearly all of these deaths occur in developing countries, where 10 to 15 percent of pregnancies end in maternal death due to unsafe abortions.

The problem is, far too many women and girls, an estimated 200 million, who don’t want to get pregnant don’t have access to effective contraception. Women in developing countries whose contraceptive needs go unmet are exposed to life-threatening pregnancy complications. With repeated mulitiple pregnancies comes increased risk of health complications or death. Access to family planning can remedy this.

The UK government along with the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation sponsored the London Family Planning Summit, which took place in London today, to support the right of women and girls to decide, freely and for themselves, whether, when and how many children they have.

They gathered together an impressive array of world leaders to discuss the goal of enabling 120 million more women and girls access to contraceptives by 2020.

“As well as providing family planning for an additional 120 million women in the world’s poorest countries, the global community will commit to sustaining coverage for the estimated 260 million women in these countries who are currently using contraceptives (as of June 2012). By 2020, we aim to deliver contraceptives, information, and services to a total of 380 million women and girls in developing countries so they can plan their families.

It’s a lofty goal. And certainly a worthy one. (The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation is reported to have pledged to spend $8 billion dollars towards reaching this goal over the next eight years.) Yet social and cultural norms make the seemingly simple idea of access to birth control extremely complex. Considerations like lack of geographical mobility and few financial resources, not to mention a strong culture of patriarchy, are all significant obstacles to getting all women and girls in the world access to the contraception they need.

Have you ever thought of how easy it is to take access to birth control for granted? What would your life look like without it?

Image from flickr creative commons

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Betsy Shaw


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  • Sarah P

    I couldn’t live my life the way I want to without birth control. I couldn’t be married, for sure. We’re super fertile and conceived our babies within a month of “trying” without BC. Now, I can go without sex for quite awhile, but my husband wouldn’t last, and I don’t trust natural family planning for us.

  • megan

    lol, in that case, mild infertility (like having to ttc for 3 or so years) would be a blessing. interesting how people get bent out of shape in the us if they don’t get preg the first month trying in the US now, but if we didn’t have bc, this would be a real blessing….

    for us, yes, i would survive, but it would suck. b/c my first was a c-sec, so each c-sec after 3 or 4 would be increasingly more dangerous, and 18 months in between births is advised after a c-sec to avoid rupture.

  • Erica P

    Of course I could survive! I don’t use BC! We use NFP. It’s very effective, has no side effects, and contributes to better communication between husband and wife.

    It works well for women all over the world. There are pockets of poor Indian women with remarkably low birth rates, who were taught by Mother Teresa’s nuns.

    If we could promote this safe, effective, and FREE form of family planning to poor women, I think I could do a lot of good.

  • LilRhody

    My daughter is on birth control to treat her PCOS, so no – I don’t relish the idea of not having it available. Thank goodness I don’t work someplace that won’t help pay towards the prescription!

  • Kit

    I use Natural Family Planning because the health risks of birth control aren’t worth it for me. Blood clots, strokes, heart attacks, permanent infertility, migraines. None of those things sound “life saving” to me. Teach women and girls everywhere to understand their bodies and their fertility, and they will have the ability to choose for themselves when and if they want to conceive a child. And Sarah P, even if you are “super fertile” there are still only a few days each cycle where it is physically possible to conceive. If you know when those days are, then it doesn’t matter what you do the rest of the time!

    • http://www.numbmum.com/ Betsy Shaw

      The problem with this ideal scenario is it involves the man being supportive of, respectful of and on board with preventing pregnancy. From what I know and have read, that is not the case in many of these countries.

  • Rachel

    Well my mother had her 3rd child by the time I was 23 months old…my daughter is 21 months old and I can’t even imagine being in my mother’s situation…hurray for birth control!

  • Traci McDonald

    My life would look the same as it does right now. I don’t and have never, used birth control.

  • HeatherF

    I don’t use birth control. I have been on it before to treat heavy bleeding and month long cramps and after trying a bunch of different kinds over the years.. I rather have heavy periods and lots of cramps.
    I think when it comes down to it.. birth control for woman world wide is great.. but I think knowledge about how a woman’s body work is more important. I think most people are really uninformed on how a women’s reproductive system works. As Erica P said in her comment.. when these people in India were made aware of NFP their birthrates went down.
    Yes, most of these poor countries are dominantly male controlled and would not be supportive of NFP… since that takes both people being willing. Are we talking about making hormonal birth control available for all or are we talking about all forms of birth control, like condoms? Condoms might be an easier more cost effective way to help some of these people.

    • http://www.numbmum.com/ Betsy Shaw

      “Are we talking about making hormonal birth control available for all or are we talking about all forms of birth control, like condoms?”That’s a good question. I don’t know the answer. I imagine the ultimate goal is to provide choices that can be suited to individual situations, just like we have.

  • Megan

    I wouldn’t want to live without birth control! I don’t want to have to stress out about whether or not I’m pregnant all the time. Knowing the birth control is there is kinda nice!

  • Jennifer

    It’s so hard to believe that while they’re making huge steps forward on this in the developing world now, we may actually be going backward in this country (USA). If the republicans have their way, it will be harder to get birth control and impossible to get an abortion in this country. How can republicans justify their stance when the logic for supporting birth control is so apparent to everyone else in the world? The heading for these comments should instead be “are you ready to live without birth control?” because that is where this country is headed. I hear Canada is nice…

  • kim

    I know a lot of developing countries are still in the mindset that more kids=more wealth. If birth control was readily available would the women even accept it? Or would their husbands allow it? What about all of the religions against birth control? Islam does not have a written out ban in all countries, but it well known that they won’t allow it. On the other hand Hinduism doesn’t seem against it at all. Most developing countries are a male dominated society. They also have more men than women because of the maternal death rates, so the richer males get the women. Would men really be willing to give up all that power?

  • mandy

    I could live without it.
    @Jennifer, as a republican I would love to see more access to birth control for girls, and from what I know it isn’t that hard to get. Just go to planned parenthood, that’s what all my friends and I did in high school! I do hope to see abortions become harder to access and much more restricted, but I think a big step in the right direction with abortion would be having more girls on birth control and comprehensive sex education.

  • bashysarah

    I was an anthropology major in college and spent a decent amount of time discussing this issue, and would have loved to have been in on that forum. I would assume that this DOES include all forms of birth control, including family planning and condom use. There are issues with each method depending on where you are, who you are, and what cultural role women play in that particular society. Condoms are not necessarily reliable in a lot of places because they don’t hold up well in warmer temperatures, and require the woman to get the man’s cooperation. At a basic level, education about reproductive systems and natural family planning is the starting point for most women’s programs, but gaining access to women to educate them is problematic in many places, too. Throw in various cultural issues about when and how it is or is not acceptable to even touch your own sexual organs throws a whole other kink in the plans. Forums where people who work with different groups in different places are a great way to build better programs, as there is no such thing as one size fits all birth control.
    I am personally lucky that I could now live without birth control, as I was allowed to choose to have my tubes tied during the birth of my second child. But in college? Yikes. I was lucky that I started taking the pill for regulatory reasons before I needed them to prevent pregnancy. And I learned I am not so great about condom use, but luckily kept that from being an issue by being really picky about potential mates, and completely open with sexual histories before doing the deed. Without birth control, I would currently be absolutely paranoid about having a child now (I already have two) because I know we could not financially or emotionally handle it.

  • at

    I’ve never been responsible enough to take pills regularly. My husband and i have used the withdrawl methode for 18 years. It’s worked fine

  • Julius

    What is it that Republicans are doing to make it harder to get birth control?? I know they are against the HHS mandate, but that is a new mandate requiring more birth control coverage.

    What really makes me sad about the conditions in Africa is what I understand to be the number of girls that have to skip going to school when they are on their periods, because they don’t have hygiene products. To me, that is a greater need since you can’t exactly stop your body from having your period.

    Betsy “The problem with this ideal scenario is it involves the man being supportive of, respectful of and on board with preventing pregnancy.” this give me pause. does this mean the men are forcing themselves on their wives, SOs, other women?

    I have read people complain about these orgs. seem to determined to reduce populations, and I can see that we do have issues with people not having as many kids in the developing world which makes for us not having the number of people to keep our economies going (so immigration is how we get workers), but I can’t get on board with that type of thinking.

    I also saw something about France trying to do something about reducing population in the 1800s, but how did they do it???

    • http://www.numbmum.com/ Betsy Shaw


      Yes. Absolutely. And many are not yet women but child brides.

      And I don’t know about France but lately they are on a mission to increase the population of the French. Women are essentially paid for having babies.

  • Momof4

    I think a full pronged approach is in order. But birth control first would not be my option. Finding a way to stop the Rape, would be my first prong of the approach.

    The mental conditioning of these women through the rape of their men is need to conceive in order to get it to stop. By just giving them the BC, without addressing the rape issue, you are taking away 8-9months of relative safety (I say relative, because it is not always the case).

    Instead of focusing on the birth rate, focus on the rape rate. That is what is harming the women. It is brainwashing their minds so they won’t accept BC even if you offered it. Condoms would be beyond acceptance as the Natural method would be because it would be male dependent.

    Fight the rape
    offer shelter
    offer necessary sanitary pads and things
    offer BC education and then let the woman choose (NON BIASED education)

    Help them move out from under a male’s roof, teach them a self sufficient skill…

    Birth control is only treating a symptom not the disease.

  • Julius

    Here Here Momof4.

    I was going to suggest castration rather than birth control, but Momof4’s suggestion is much better.

    On the child bride’s subject, I recently saw a picture of a long line of “couple” full grown men with young girls in white dresses at their side holding flag of the country that they were in (I won’t say the country to start a big debate). It was by far the creepiest thing I have ever seen.

  • bashysarah

    Trust me, programs that work to change basic attitudes are instituted, as are programs aimed at helping the women help themselves through microcredit loans, agricultural teaching programs, and various health services. The issues with girls not being able to attend school during their periods for lack of hygiene products is also a shadow of cultures that traditionally separate menstrating women (although personally I think this is not such a bad idea. I don’t want much to do with dh most of the time i’m having mine…), but supplies are an issue. I would love to see widespread encouragement of menstrual cups as they would be much less of a disposal issue. Birth control programs all run alongside the other education and development programs. People are not just going in to random villages and saying ‘here! you need condoms so you don’t have any more kids!’ and leaving the women to coerce the men by themselves.

  • nanners

    I could totally live with out “birth control”. I use the fertility awareness method and it is extremly effective. It works even for those with long cycles, those with PCOS, those who have wacky BFing cycles…sure, it takes extra effort. Hormonal BC causes many issues in women today, its so ingrained in us that we are supposed to feel the way we do on it, that we dont realized how much it affects our bodies, moods, etc. A healthy spacing of pregnancies and children is important for most, and it can easily be acheieved with out pumping artificial hormones into our bodies…

  • Valkyrie

    Momof4: the problem with your suggestion is that in many of these cultures, not only is marital rape condoned, if the wife doesn’t want to, SHE is the defective one. Further, if her spouse seeks company in other beds, THAT is her fault (clearly she wasn’t doing her “duty” by him well enough *eye roll*) as well. The cultural “place” of a woman isn’t just “in the kitchen”, it is beneath her husband. In every way including, but not limited to, literally. And the women are trained to accept this from birth, and even help enforce it. Changing whole cultures to “Stop the Rape!!!” is near impossible, birth control is easier and quicker, and at least by extending the option of birth control, even if it’s only treating one of the symptoms, they’ll have a chance at being ALIVE* to see cultural changes happen.

    *Having a baby a year will, eventually, kill most women. Particularly in poorer countries where there isn’t much medical care for such “simple every day things” as labor and delivery, and dozens of things can go wrong every time.

  • Momof4

    @Valkyrie – I do understand the cultural issue. I am not blind to that. Just because it is “cultural” doesn’t make it right.

    My point was made at the end that BC is just a band aid on a Big problem that won’t stop anything, because it just addresses one symptom.

    I understand the idea of going with the cheaper & quicker option, but the fact is the “cultural” influence will negate what people are trying to accomplish with BC. Not only is rape and spousal rape part of the culture, so is the value of a man estimated by the number of children he creates. A woman who cannot or chooses not to have children (by taking and hiding the fact she is taking bc), she will be ostracized because she cannot have children. It will be her fault, she will be seen as “defective” and useless, and there are no amount of problems that will arise for her if she makes that a conscious choice.

    So the BC band aid is not going to solve anything in that type of society, in essence it will make it worse for the women.

  • Valkyrie


    No. It doesn’t. But because it’s cultural it will take decades, at minimum, to make progress there. By providing the option of birth control, you give women a chance to survive long enough for the cultural changes to happen. That is the POINT of bandages. To hold you together until the actual problem is fixed. Damn straight it’s a bandaid. Bandaids are GOOD things.

    • http://www.numbmum.com/ Betsy Shaw

      And while I understand where both of you are coming from, Momof4, the patriarchal culture that essentially abuses women and considers them second class citizens should be challenged, I have to agree with Valkyrie in thinking that more than a BandAid, birthcontrol is power for these women. Without the power to control their own reproduction, and not be pregnant or nursing every waking day of their fertile years, they will never have the power to rise above being treated like baby making machines with no right for a future of their own design.

  • I agree

    Yes I agree with Valkyrie, while we are taking years to change the mindset of men etc in underdeveloped/developing countries, we need to provide women with something to protect them from pregnancy. It would be nice to try and teach NFP to all, especially the USA, but for certain countries where women are objects or are dominated by men..it just wouldn’t be an option.

  • Milania’s Mom

    I really haven’t thought what it would be like if I wasn’t able to obtain contraceptives but I would definitely have more than 1 child by now if I was unable to use it. As much as I love my daughter I can’t imagine having another right now so I feel extremely blessed to only have one. I think its great what Bill and Melinda gates are trying to do and I hope they are successful, its a shame that all those women who die every year from complications from child birth.

  • Debbie Newton

    I couldn’t live without birth control. My dh is a great guy but when he gets in the mood his little head does all the thinking lol. Without birth control my children would be only a year apart, after the doc gave us the ok my dh was revving to go. Plus for my sister when she wasn’t taking birth control her hormones were out of control and she would bleed through a pad an hour. Doctors tried tons of things to fix it. Now she takes birth control, drinks red raspberry leaf tea and takes Evening Primrose Oil pills and she is her calm, happy, funny self again.

  • Ashley

    I could not live without birth control. I have PCOS and using the basal method or anything else would be out of the question to not have sex during my fertile time as I do not have a regular period. Even so, it took me 7 months to conceive and I only had 2 of my own cycles in that time. The others I had to take provera anyhow. So, for me, my body depends on birth control. I may be overweight but, that is not why I do not have regular cycles. I never have had them, and also my mom has PCOS and she isn’t overweight and she had irregular cycles. Anyways, with this said, I got on birth control at age 17 because of wanting regular cycles. Not because I was using it as a form of birth control :).

  • Christina

    I could, and have, live without BC. My question is, like when infant formula was pushed on moms in less developed countries, what kind of education, medical attention, and followup will be provided to ensure the proper usage of a hormonal BC? Remember what happened to women in the US on Yaz? Kidney stones, UTIs, cancer, to name a few. There iis a great need to help these women, but how can we say giving them a chemical drug is the answer?

  • Shylee

    Well..we concieved our son while I was on the trusty pill and we only didn’t use a condom 1x. So now that the baby is here, we are opting for a new form on BC

  • Amanda

    I can live with out it. Not using birth control does not mean you are going to have babies like a certain televised family. I had a seven year gap between children without using birth control. We just did not conceive in that time. It is very true that you are only fertile so many days a cycle. If you miss those days you do not get pregnant. Yes birth control makes having sex less likely to conceive but I feel that if you are in a relationship that is truly committed you acknowledge the chance of creating a new life.

    In other countries, well, though I agree These women often feel forced to have many children. The issues they face are grave. They do not have adequate medical attention period. Not just prenatal and feminine care. We must also feel for those where birth control is mandated. Such as China with its One child policy and its harsh penalties to those who want reproductive freedom.

  • nathalie

    I just wanted to say quickly that while it is true that there are only two or so fertile days in a woman’s cycle, sperm can luve for up to five days! Not everyone takes this into account. Theoretically that means women can conceive 12 days out if a month. Granted the chances are reduced each day further she is from ovulation, but added to the fact that many women are not comfortable having intercourse while they are menstruating, thats around 19 days per month that are not safe if you don’t want to become pregnant. That wouldn’t work for myself or my husband! Just my two cents about NFP…

  • nathalie


  • lizw

    i don’t think that this article is talking about family planning the way we know it. in african, virgins are raped because the men have been told that sex with a virgin cures aids. that is a situation where NFP and condoms won’t necessarily play any part in the “planning”. when you’re not given an option about when penetration will happen in relation to your ovulation cycle, it is then impossible to control conception based on natural means.

  • carla

    We gave up using it completely. We felt convicted not to use anything but a barrier method, and then we just didn’t like that much. So we are leaving it in God’s hands. I actually feel much better not trying to control it myself anymore. So, I live fine without birth control. Two sweet surprises whom I couldn’t imagine life without!

  • Ashley

    Nathalie – I think your math is off a bit. If sperm live 5 days, and a woman is fertile 2 days, then at most there would be a 6 or 7 day window in which the woman could get pregnant. Not 12 – once the egg leaves the body, you cannot get pregnant during that cycle. So you cannot add 5 days before and after the fertile window. Which means, if you don’t have sex while menstruating, you’re looking at 11or 12ish days of no sex per month, not 19. You should do some more research about NFP, you’d probably be surprised at how simple and effective it is. After I did my research, hubby and I opted for this method and not only did we avoid any unwanted pregnancies; but when we did decide to have a baby, we were able to conceive in 2 months because we both understood my body’s fertility cycle.

    As far as this article is concerned… I agree with the previous posters who would opt for better sexual education for men and women. I believe that knowledge is power, and would enable these women to truly choose what is best for themselves. If we just hand out and promote birth control without educating these women, how can they really decide what is best for themselves? Like several previous posters have mentioned, birth control does a lot more to a woman’s body than just preventing her from getting pregnant.

  • Han

    I can and do. I don’t believe in birth control :)

  • Mel

    Of course I could live without birth control!

    It’s not a lack of contraceptives that makes countries have a high birth rate, it’s a lack of education. Women just don’t know about their own bodies and how they work! Many third world countries, especially in Africa, are devoutly religious.

    I just read an article here on BBC that said that 37% of births in the US are unplanned. Apparently contracptives aren’t helping us too much either. We have generations of women who have no idea where they are in their fertility cycle, no idea if or when they are ovulating, no idea of how their own bodies work. We have convinced women that the only way to have control over their fertility is to try and stop it altogether, and as a result we are all running around blind.

    Ditching the contracpetives and learning NFP was one of the most liberating things I have ever done. Knowledge is true power.

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