Size of the United States Compared to Other Countries

I was curious to know how other countries compared in size to the United States, so I pulled images of countries that have been on my mind recently from Wikipedia and Google.

The United States is fourth largest in land area. Russia is the biggest by far, Canada is next, and then China is just a smidge larger. Here are some visual aids to give you comparative sizes of the U.S. in comparison with Australia, Iran, North Korea, Russia, Syria, the United Kingdom. I plotted out U.S. cities that are roughly the same distance from the furthest points of each country. The distances are as the crow flies, not travel distance based on roadways. I also didn’t compensate for the curvature of the Earth but the layout is accurate enough to get the picture.

United States compared to Australia

Comparative sizes of the United States and Australia

United States compared to Iran

Comparative sizes of the United States and Iran

United States compared to North Korea

Comparative sizes of the United States and North Korea

United States compared to Russia

Comparative sizes of the United States and Russia

United States compared to Syria

Comparative sizes of the United States and Syria

United States compared to the United Kingdom

Comparative sizes of the United States and the United Kingdom

Since I’ve made fun of everyone else (except Australia — the Aussies escaped our pokes this time; we’ll have to correct that at some point), here’s a jab at the United States.

And here’s your bonus. Latveria may be a very small country, but it is ruled with an iron hand by a despotic and dangerous dictator.

United States compared to Latveria

Comparative size of United States and Latveria

North Korean Leftovers

Several weeks ago I thought it might be fun to hit 500 posts and 200,000 page views at the same time. So, I sort of paced things out and figured the stars would align sometime in November. But, the recent “mature audience” posts I’ve been doing have skewed my daily averages significantly. This is my 457th post and I’ve only got 9,000 page views to go. I suppose I could stick with the “quality is everything” principle and just let the 200,000 milestone happen regardless of the number of posts I’ve done, but I have no principles and this is the world’s most irresponsible blog (says I, irresponsibly).

So, I’m going to give it the old college try and see if I can produce 43 posts in what I’m projecting to be less than a month. Of course, I’m out of luck if I keep getting the occasional bumps I’ve gotten recently. I’m sure you fellow casual bloggers can report your own surprise runs on particular posts.  I did a post on The Top 20 Most Interesting Flags in the World several weeks ago and somehow it got picked up on Reddit and I ended up with almost 1,000 views on that post alone yesterday. Of course, not all attention is appreciated. I apparently pissed off a few vexillologists (flag nerds) since they left scathing remarks on Reddit. Well, it’s bound to happen. Did I mention I blog irresponsibly? At least two people liked my post and offered some helpful information on the British flag (thank you Dylan and Ian).

Anyway, what the hell does that have to do with North Korea? Nothing! But I need to submit a post and if you’re still reading, I’ve provided you with one of my trademark joke pictures. Does anyone laugh at these but me? Eh. Whatever. I enjoy laughing at my own jokes.

Kim Jong-un and Dennis Rodman satire

You may recall that Dennis “The Worm” Rodman visited Kim “The Chubby Bunny” Jong-un in North Korea a few months ago as some sort of bizarre gesture of good will or something. When Sean Penn does it, his approach may be annoyingly pedantic but he’s a workhorse and the causes he espouses actually matter. I have no idea what Rodman was up to. Anyway, this image was begging for a funny-funny. And if you’ve been watching Breaking Bad, you’ll see that I’ve been influenced by Jesse’s lingo. Yo.

Kim Jong-un on cover of Time Magazine, February 2012

This Time magazine cover came out over a year and half ago. I let it go to waste in my Unsorted folder so I might as well use it now.

Rare Kim il-Sung Comic Book

Comic books from North Korea are rare It’s tough to find good paper and nobody buys the propoganda shit unless they’re forced to do so. The topics range from not so funny send-ups of South Koreans and Americans to the amazing exploits of The Great Leader, The Dear Leader, and the Chubby Bunny Leader. Actually, there is no range. Those are pretty much the only two topics.

Here’s an extremely rare comic from 1983. While over 4 million copies were printed, only 12 survive. During the 1993 famine, people ate whatever they could get their hands on and since the comic book was printed on rice paper, it was one of the first things to go.

The comic book, “Of Course You Realize, This Means War!” featured several stories by Kim il-Sung and several of his cronies. Steve Ditko contributed the art for a two-page story about South Koreans defecting to the North. Kim was quite the accomplished artist, we are lead to believe, but like all of the tripe out of North Korea, we believe The Great Leader was as involved in the creation of this comic book as he was in the architecture of Pyongyang. It’s practically worthless outside of North Korea except as a novelty, but a copy recently sold for 7,000,000,000 ₩ (which is actually only about  US$8,000) at the Great Leader’s Comic-Con and Revolutionary Cultural Celebration in Hamhung.

Kim il-Sung North Korean Comic Book

North Korea declares war on sanity!

North Korean Flag

Well, we shouldn’t be surprised, should we? In the face of new sanctions, North Korea‘s official spookspeople released a statement indicating the hermit kingdom is ready to launch a preemptive nuclear strike against the United States. Several hours later, the United Nations Security Council voted unanimously to impose heavy sanctions. Even the Chinese can no longer justify backing the lunatics on the peninsula. The back of Dennis Rodman’s head exploded moments later.

Dennis Rodman visits North Korea and Kim Jong-un

Weird is as weird does. The Li’l Dumpling meets The Worm.

North Korean long range nuclear missle on parade

Is this an over-compensation thing?

North Korean Soldiers Marching at a Military Parade

We’ve written several posts about our disgust for dictatorships. Oppression comes in many forms, but fascist/communist criminal organizations like the North Korean government take it up a notch because they do it on a mass scale. The North Korean regime is also expert in psychological manipulation. Over the years, the Kims have developed a formidable cult of personality around their family’s dynasty. There must be something in the water when it comes to that sort of thing. How do pug-ugly dudes like the Kims, Hitler, Idi Amin, Muammar Gaddafi, Vladimir Lenin (and every USSR leader thereafter), Saddam Hussein, Osama bin-Laden, … geez, the list goes on, build a mystique and astonishingly powerful and personal demagoguery.

Kim Jong-un at a Military Event

Li’l Kim and his shameless, ass-kissing lackeys.

North Korean citizens mourning the death of Kim Jong-il

In one of the biggest coincidences ever known to modern man, over 40,000 North Koreans lost their contacts at the same time.

North Koreans mourning along the funeral procession of Kim Jong-il

Are you kidding? It’s freezing out here! We’ve already been waiting to get into the Grand Opening of Walmart-Pyongyang, and now they’re letting that pompous, pudgy porker in first?! Oh, shit. Here come the State Security Department goons.

North Korean women crying

Why do women cover their mouths when they laugh and cry? Seriously. Why?

Call us superficial, but if we’re going to be caught up in a nationalistic frenzy around a charismatic yet highly oppressive dictator, we’d choose Mitt Romney. He’s a looker with an infectious smile. Plus, his gulags would come with Olympic-size swimming pools and caviar.

Mitt Romney is a good looking man

Look, we’re not trying to compare Adolf Hitler with Mitt Romney. We’re just saying that if Mitt were a dictator, we’d prefer to hero worship his visage over ol’ Bristlebrush Puffyface.



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