Why Do We Limit Ourselves?

Many people think that just by listening to positive affirmations, that their lives will change.  They will get the perfect job, earn lots of money, find love, etc.  This is not to say that listening to positive affirmations is not helpful, because it is.  However, it is only one part of the process.

If you hear the words, but still have the subconscious belief that you do not deserve the perfect job,  to find love, etc., or that you are not smart enough or good enough – then your subconscious mind will find a way to keep it from happening.

Why do we limit ourselves?

Because we learn at a young age what is comfortable and safe, and resist going outside of that comfort zone for fear of being hurt.  In my previous post,  we looked at the parts of the mind – the subconscious, the conscious and the critical factor.

The critical factor is not present in children.  It does not begin developing until about age 7 and is firmly in place by approximately age 15.  Until then, everything goes directly into the subconscious, both positive and negative.  Young children use more intuitive reasoning (see Child Development  Institute link listed below).  They absorb a tremendous amount of programming, mostly from authority figures like parents and teachers, but also from siblings and other peers.

Where things tend to go awry is when the child either takes something that is said literally or does not want to hear (like “no”).  The child feels  hurt, sad, angry or any number of negative emotions.

The subconscious mind stores that whole scene, along with the emotions that are attached to it. As time goes on, these feelings are reinforced by subsequent experiences, until they are firmly in place as a negative belief.  This is not to say this only happens with negative beliefs.  It is the same process for positive beliefs as well.  We develop our own perception of ourselves through our experiences and the emotions we feel.

Here is an example of how a negative belief can occur.

When you were a child of, say 4 years of age, you saw a toy that you wanted.  When you said, “I want that”, your parent said, “No, you cannot have that, it’s too expensive.”  How would you feel about that?  Hurt?  Angry?  Sad?

So, in order to keep from feeling those feelings and being hurt again, your 4-year old subconscious mind developed a protective belief that you cannot want or have expensive things.

Did your mother or father mean that you do not deserve the toy?  Of course not!  They only meant that they could not afford to buy it.  However, your 4-year old subconscious mind heard , “you cannot have… expensive”, and took it literally. This continues to play out into adult life.

You limit yourself in every aspect of life to keep from being hurt and feeling bad because you feel you cannot have a high-paying job, a nice car, home, relationship, etc.

Hypnosis just doesn’t tell you to think differently.

It actually helps you find the root cause of why you have the negative belief in the first place.  You have been listening to a 4-year old, whose perception was based on how things seemed, not how they actually were (and are now).

Once you realize this, the positive suggestions become even more powerful in changing the programming. You no longer limit yourself and can realize your full potential!

For more information on stages of cognitive development in children and teenagers, as well as parenting information, see the Child Development Institute web site at  http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com


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