Tuesday 05 May 2015

Do you think I'm 'Pretty or Ugly'? Wait. Do not answer that

There are nearly half a million 'Pretty or Ugly' videos on YouTube made by young girls wanting to validate their beauty. Alice Arnold explains why this is such a problem, as a UK artist takes them on in a new show.

Louise Orwin, the British performance artist, is challenging these videos. Photo: LOUISE ORWIN

Am I pretty or ugly? NO, absolutely do not answer that question! I am concerned about what people think of me. What they think about my opinions, whether they agree or disagree. Whether they think I have handled a situation well. Whether they think I am moderately intelligent but as for my looks I have no interest in what strangers think about that

We all remember though what it felt like to be a teenager when outward appearance was everything. When fitting in with your peer group was crucial and their opinion often defined you. I remember the days when groups of boys would shout out marks out of 10 as you walked past.

However, in the age of social media, young girls and presumably some boys are using another method to judge themselves. They are posting what are termed POU (Pretty or Ugly) videos on YouTube and asking for people to comment. The numbers are huge. YouTube features almost 500,000 of them mostly from girls aged between nine to14.

Now the British performance artist, Louise Orwin has introduced her “Pretty Ugly” project involving her own fake POU clips, a live performance in London and a call for a debate around our relationship with the internet and social media.

What is it that induces young girls to expose themselves to such vulnerability? Some of the clips are incredibly sad by girls positively asking to be insulted. Others come from more confident children (and lets remember these ARE children) wanting even more affirmation.

The internet and social media has so many positive aspects, allowing us to communicate with strangers and broadening our horizons but we all need to be aware of dangers.

Someone’s looks are, of course, subjective. What is beautiful to you may be quite plain to me. We all know that most do not fit either into the “pretty” or ‘ugly” category. We sit somewhere in the middle. An attractive personality shines through and always outweighs the shape of someone’s nose!

What these young girls are asking is “am I stereotypically pretty?”. But more dangerous than the question they are asking is whom they are asking. The answer is total strangers.

If someone you know asks if you like their new outfit you will think carefully before you respond. If you are not keen you will (hopefully) use a degree of tact and kindness. However, if you see an outfit in a magazine you don’t like you would feel free to rip it to shreds.

These young girls, posting their YouTube clips are like the models in the magazines, except they can hear the response. Indeed they positively court it. As we know the internet is often a cruel forum. I can’t imagine the damage that could be done to someone so young and vulnerable.

There is no going back. We can’t ban children from putting themselves in these positions but we should be asking questions. Are teenagers more obsessed than ever about how they look is it just that now they have a different and wider platform?

I would urge a parent to ask themselves if they would allow their daughter to stand in the middle of the town square with a sign round their neck saying “Pretty or Ugly?” and why not throw in a bucket of rotten fruit to chuck at them just for good measure?

This is in effect, what these YouTube sites are. The fact that the child may be a willing participant does not mean that they should not be protected.

The internet has done more than almost anything else to widen the generation gap. But we have a responsibility to young people to protect them from it in the same way we try to protect them from drugs or pornography.

If there are 500,000 POU videos out there, then there are 1,000,000 parents or guardians who need to be a whole lot more vigilant.

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