Women's Tips

Quick temper: learn to overcome


Hot temper can be considered a character trait or a manifestation of negative emotions. This is emotional incontinence and a sudden explosion of irritability, which is especially characteristic of temperamental people.

Hot temper can be observed in both women and men, but in the stronger sex it is more common, as the weak half of humanity is usually characterized by other variations in the manifestation of emotions: touchiness, transition to the role of victim, indictment and hysteria.

Hot temper may be unreasonable (empty) or reasonable. In the first case, a person explodes for no reason or for contrived reasons, and in the second - because of irritants, for example, unpleasant situations and people, negative events. But even if hot temper is justified, it hinders much, especially if it appears regularly and often.

Why does it occur?

Many psychologists consider quick temper to be a character trait, and this is true, because some people literally explode for any reason, while others are extremely difficult to ruffle, or their emotions manifest with restraint or other means. Sometimes the peculiarity of an unconsciously implanted and rooted parents in the process of education: if mom and dad are quick-tempered, then the child will adopt it and assume that such behavior is acceptable and normal.

There are reasons provoking or intensifying hot temper, and these include:

  1. Improper diet, for example, excessively rigid diets, exclusion from the diet of certain foods and the prevalence of monotonous food in it, fasting or, on the contrary, systematic overeating. Nutrient deficiencies adversely affect the nervous system.
  2. Harmful habits: alcohol abuse, drug intake, smoking.
  3. Great physical fatigue, frequent overwork.
  4. Nervous tension, emotional overload, frequent stresses and experiences.
  5. Mental or emotional overload.
  6. Constant lack of sleep.
  7. Low self-esteem, lack of faith in yourself and your strength. Imaginary helplessness annoying, often forcing to break.
  8. Dissatisfaction with oneself, surrounding people, one’s own life or certain events.
  9. Physiological factors, namely health problems: frequent colds, chronic diseases, accompanied by unpleasant or even more painful symptoms.
  10. Hormonal disorders and changes are characteristic of women during pregnancy, during menopause and menopause, some gynecological diseases.
  11. Mental disorders, emotional background instability.

How does it manifest itself?

Consider the possible manifestations of hot temper:

  • emotional outbursts
  • mood swings from joy and pleasure to anger and irritation,
  • severe uncontrollable irritation,
  • unwillingness to listen to an opponent, listen to the opinions of others,
  • increased breathing and heartbeat,
  • trembling in limbs
  • increased sweating
  • fast, sometimes incoherent and incomprehensible speech,
  • swear words
  • gesticulation
  • the use of physical force: to people or inanimate objects (throwing furniture, hitting the walls),
  • changes in skin color: redness, redness, red spots.

Usually hot temper is manifested by some bursts. During an attack, a person does not control himself, but after him he may be aware of the guilt and abnormal behavior, feel emptiness, depression, helplessness, his own inconsistency.

How to solve a problem?

How to deal with hot temper? If it occurs occasionally, does not interfere with life and does not negatively affect the people around you and events happening to you, then you should not worry: you need to splash out emotions. If you are excessively hot-tempered, often break down and do not control yourself, your words and actions, then the problem must be solved.

Useful tips for hot-tempered people:

  1. Awareness and correction of behavior. This method involves several steps, and the first is an analysis of the situation. Think about what brought you out of yourself and made you nervous: events independent of you, unpleasant situations, communication or conflicts with certain people, your own helplessness or clumsiness. The second stage - the conclusions: realize the emotional surge, describe the feelings. The third stage is the correction of behavior. Consider how to behave better next time to avoid short temper. So, you can prepare in advance for these or other events, avoid contact with unpleasant people and conflicts, accept conditions that do not suit you.
  2. Relaxation. When overvoltage is useful to just relax: sleep well, do not think about the affairs and concerns.
  3. A change of scenery. Try to go on a trip, go to visit, go hiking, stroll through the park.
  4. Elimination of irritants. If possible, neutralize all the factors that can take you out of yourself.
  5. Nice memories. In a flash of anger, think of something good: a loved one, a vacation, some memorable event.
  6. Relaxation. Learn different relaxation techniques, for example, meditation, abstraction, visualization (creating images and conditions using fantasy), listening to your favorite music.
  7. Sublimation. Direct energy in a different direction, for example, play sports, scream in the pillow, beat a punching bag.
  8. Favourite buisness. Finding an interesting and satisfying hobby, you can be distracted in difficult moments and get good emotions.
  9. Normalization of the emotional background. In case of excessive stress and stress, you should consult a doctor and, according to his recommendation, start taking sedatives.
  10. Professional help. If temper prevents you from living, contact a psychologist, find out its nature and, with the help of an experienced specialist, correct your behavior and learn to control emotions.
  11. A stress relieving thing. Carry an item that helps you personally control your emotions. It can be a rosary, a soft toy, a smooth ball.
  12. For health problems, begin treatment.

Risks and consequences

Hot temper is dangerous, often leads to sad consequences. Firstly, it interferes at work: it does not allow you to professionally perform tasks and communicate with colleagues and clients, to achieve success and show yourself as a worthy employee.

Secondly, excessive temper is out of place in personal and family life. If you constantly fall for your loved ones, they will be offended and suffer, in the end, may limit or stop communicating with you.

Thirdly, frequent emotional outbursts are dangerous to health and are fraught with diseases of the cardiovascular and nervous systems, frequent exacerbations of chronic diseases, problems with digestion.

Fight your hot temper effectively and in a timely manner so that it doesn’t ruin your life completely. Patience and success in solving the problem!

Main reasons

Hot temper, it is also called emotional incontinence or explosive irritability, often is a congenital feature of the behavior of a person. In a quiet state, he is quite pleasant in communication, can control himself. Whereas, at the peak of his emotions, a hot-tempered person literally gushes into space with his incontinence, shouts, gestures.

Both external and internal factors can provoke an outbreak of incontinence, from the banal lack of sleep to the exacerbation of a disease, for example, a stomach ulcer with severe pain.

The most common causes of hot temper are:

  • uncorrected diet - the predominance of fatty, heavy, difficult to digest food in it,
  • accumulated physical fatigue
  • constant feeling of anxiety, living in fear,
  • emotional and intellectual overload,
  • abuse of low-calorie diets
  • lack of sleep
  • workaholism - when vacation is not taken for years, even decades.

Different types of addiction can also be the basis for changing behavior that is familiar to a person. For example, drinking a glass of wine on holidays, developing into an addiction to alcoholic beverages, has an extremely negative effect on manners and behavior. Or the habit to relax with the help of narcotic substances, dependence on computer games - they can also be the basis of anger, hot temper. It is required to carefully collect anamnesis, ask not only friends, but also relatives, as well as colleagues.

What diseases and disorders may occur?

Increased excitability is a consequence of the reaction of nerve structures to the situation. In a healthy, rested, well-fed person, it will be adequate even for severe stress or a negligent subordinate.

The manifestation of incontinence, previously uncharacteristic for a relative or friend, must be correlated with events in his life. So, the inadequacy is quite understandable, if, for example, there was a loss of a loved one, a loved one. Or another misfortune happened recently - a serious illness, an infection, a trauma. Physical and psychological stress depletes the body’s compensatory abilities. There is excessive temper.

This may be due to diabetes mellitus, pancreatitis, hyperthyroidism. Comprehensive diagnostic examination allows to establish the correct diagnosis in a timely manner, to find a complete treatment.

In women, psychopathization in combination with crying may indicate pregnancy in the reproductive age, or the onset of menopause after 45-50 years. The explanation is the fluctuation of hormonal levels. A similar disorder occurs in men - with a decrease in the amount of testosterone.

Borderline personality disorder is another reason for excessive temper. Only this quality will manifest itself from an early age. You can read more about this pathology here.

If short temper has become almost the norm of behavior - outbreaks happen almost every day, consultation with a psychotherapist is required to exclude more serious disorders. For example, schizophrenia, manic-depressive syndrome. In this case, it is necessary to conduct special treatment in a specialized hospital.

How does the disorder manifest

The lability of the daily mood of the same person can vary in a significant range - from a joyful mood, anticipating the upcoming day, to deep depression and fatigue after the end of the work shift. And the natural irritation on this background, the desire to rest, sleep, is a completely natural reaction of the human body.

However, in some people negative destructive emotions can arise not only because of fatigue, but literally “from scratch”. At this point, a significant amount of adrenaline enters their bloodstream, which provokes a heartbeat, a jump in blood pressure.

At the end of the attack, there is a feeling of emptiness, weakness, gloominess, and helplessness. Many people later regret their incontinence.

For a quick-tempered person, jumping from one subject of discussion to another, from a relatively calm state of mind to a bright flame of “righteous anger”, is characteristic. However, the loss of self-control does not allow him to sensibly assess the situation, which often results in an incorrect decision. An employee of a company or production has a similar personality trait that actively impedes promotion.

What other symptoms may appear

Hot temper, as a rule, is not observed at the person in itself. Since it is based on the hyperreaction of the nervous system to an external or internal stimulus that provokes a powerful release of adrenaline into the blood, then in addition a person will experience:

  • marked palpitations - tachycardia,
  • excessive sweating - perspiration on the face, body, hyperhidrosis,
  • tremors in the limbs - tremor,
  • excessive gesticulation - waving his arms, uncontrolled blows to the walls, furniture, people,
  • quick speech - the words literally "naskakivayut" against each other, do not have time to pronounce until the end,
  • overwhelming emotions when a person literally cannot cope with their experiences,
  • discoloration of the skin - in some people, the face and chest become too red, others turn pale, or become "spotty."

Most people relate excessive emotionality to female behavior, whereas psychopathy in men occurs at about the same frequency. They may simply be called a little differently - angry, emotionally unrestrained, explosive.

Recommendations of psychologists

If negative behavior more and more often becomes the “norm” for this or that person, it’s time to think about how to deal with hot temper.

For those who do not wish to seek help from a specialist, with occasional uncontrollability, you can try to cope with the situation yourself:

  • carefully analyze that year and most often provokes an outbreak of negative emotions,
  • if the basis of the changed behavior is the accumulated physical or psycho-emotional overload, it is better to take a vacation and change the situation - relax, relax, find a hobby for everyone,
  • if there is a disease or pathological disorder, accompanied by an excessive production of adrenaline, it is better to conduct a comprehensive treatment with modern medicines - sometimes pharmacotherapy will be recommended for lifelong administration, in some cases even surgery may be needed,
  • if uncontrollable flashes occur when communicating only with a certain person, it is better to stop contacting them at all,
  • a good way to overcome short temper is to play sports — not necessarily becoming a professional, you can go to the gym or swimming pool 2-3 times a week, and feel much better.

In the case when there is an approach to the “heat of passions”, it is better to take a pause in the conversation, mentally run through the whole situation, take a few deep breaths, count to ten. All these actions will help not only to "cool down", but also to understand what was the provoking factor. Taking yourself in hand, you can already build a dialogue differently, lead it to a productive outcome.

How to get rid of hot temper?

First of all, it is necessary to understand - absolutely everyone has negative emotions. Some people simply have their severity much higher than what is considered normal.

A specialist will assign treatment tactics after receiving information from diagnostic procedures. It is necessary to exclude the presence in the patient's body of brain tumors, thyroid gland activity, adrenal glands. All these organs can directly influence people's emotions and behavior.

In the female half of humanity, hormonal "storms" can accompany bursts. For example, in the period of carrying a baby, when there is a restructuring of the body as a whole. The state is adjusted independently after the birth of the baby. Later, with climacteric deterioration of health, you may need well-chosen hormone replacement therapy.

The same can be said about men - they are also restoring the parameters of testosterone, a hormone that is responsible for the full functioning of the most important organs of a man.

In addition, in order to prevent outbursts of emotional incontinence, the attending physician may recommend:

  • mild sedatives
  • tranquilizers,
  • antidepressants
  • hypnotic drugs.

Ignore the frequent occurrence of the desire to throw out the accumulated irritation on others. If conversations with oneself - auto-training, or a close person - sincere communication, do not help, it is recommended to consult a psychotherapist. Specialized care provided in time is effective prevention of the progression of the disorder, and sometimes a saved life.

What is dangerous hot temper?

Hot temper is an aggravation to abnormal, excessive emotional manifestations, explosive reactions to ordinary irritants, incontinence, a predisposition to anger. The phenomenon under consideration is more common in men. Femines are also prone to temper, but their version is often played out through the position of the victim and is usually found in insults or hysteria. Hysteria and touchiness are considered feminine variants of hot temper. This concept is often referred to as bad character traits. This is not entirely true, since there are two variations of hot temper: reasonable and empty.

Causes a hot temper

The concept in question is considered not to be the best trait, since uncontrollable anger can seriously complicate existence and distort relations with the environment. При нервном возбуждении, которое нередко сопровождается злобой и агрессивностью, сложно подвергать анализу произнесенное и подбирать верные слова.As a result, short-tempered individuals are often ashamed of their unworthy behavioral manifestations. However, after a rather short period, this situation is repeated under the influence of a number of circumstances.

Hot temper is a rather dangerous phenomenon in psychology, as it drives negative emotions into the depths of consciousness, causing mental problems, a disorder in communication and self-perception.

The reasons provoking excessive temper, include various stressors or injustices caused unfairly.

Common factors that cause the condition in question: regular lack of sleep, bad habits, constant anxiety, unhealthy diet, abuse of low-calorie foods, increased anxiety, accumulated fatigue, vitamin deficiency, depression, life troubles.

Often, increased excitability signals the presence of infectious diseases, mental pathologies, diseases of the digestive tract, diabetes mellitus. In addition, hot temper may be due to thyroid dysfunction.

Hot temper in the female population often occurs during pregnancy or menopause. A similar condition is associated with hormonal transformations in the body. The sons of Adam suffer from excessive excitability due to a decrease in the production of the hormone testosterone. It has also been proven by science that this feature, if it is a stable characteristic, has a hereditary nature.

Individuals with low self-esteem often overestimate the bar in front of them. As a result, they can not match their own far-fetched image of the ideal "I". This causes frustrations in family relationships, problems in the work environment. The result is a constantly present irritability, firmly rooted in the mind. In order to avoid this, it is not necessary to compare your own achievements with the successes of other individuals.

Upset intermittent hot temper

Attacks of aggressiveness, verbal insults, assault are the characteristic signs of excessive short temper. Anyone can become psychoan, but often aggressiveness is generated by a disorder of intermittent irascibility, which is often affected by a strong half of humanity.

A characteristic feature of the disorder described is considered to be inadequate response to a minor situation, the slightest excuse, criticism, barb, stress, difficulty in relationships. Each subject is able to flare up, but the majority is still able to control excessive emotional response, but with the disorder in question, the individual is unstoppable in his own reactions. His frenzy always goes beyond what is permitted and tends to repeat periodically.

Disorder of intermittent temper is called behavioral abnormalities, characterized by explosive episodes of anger, often reaching the apogee. Such flashes are disproportionate to the circumstances that gave rise to them. Impulsive aggressiveness is involuntary and is caused by a disproportionate response to any provocation, actual or planned. Some individuals exhibit affective transformations before a seizure.

The deviation described is a serious mental health disorder that needs to be treated as it can turn into violence. Friends, colleagues, relatives may suffer. Individuals suffering from this disorder are at risk of other mental disorders. Among them are frequent cases of alcoholism and drug addiction. Also, the described disorder with age often causes myocardial problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, arthritis. Therefore, the question of how to get rid of hot temper is not without its relevance.

Today, this disorder is classified as a disruptive, impulsive disorder of self-control and behavioral response. Patients suffering from the described deviation demonstrate episodes characterized by various bodily symptoms (sweating, palpitations, restraint in retrosternal space, twitching). Aggressive behavior is often accompanied by a feeling of relief, sometimes accompanied by a feeling of pleasure. Late repentance replaces such feelings.

A significant feature of this deviation is the appearance of discrete episodes of lack of resistance to aggressive predators, leading to serious malicious acts or the destruction of things.

The degree of aggression shown during the outbreak is not proportional to the provocation or the impact of the psychosocial stressor.

It is rather difficult to diagnose the described deviation, since it is possible to make a diagnosis only if other mental disorders are excluded, which may also be accompanied by episodes of hot temper, for example, antisocial or borderline personality disorder, manic episode, behavioral disorders.

In addition, similar clinical manifestations can occur due to Alzheimer's disease, direct physiological effects of certain chemicals (pharmacopoeial drugs, narcotic drugs), and head injuries.

The signs of the disorder in question usually include the following:

- several discrete attacks of refusal to resist aggressive stimuli, causing violent negative emotions or destruction of property,

- the degree of aggression manifested during an outbreak is incommensurable with a psychosocial stressor,

- outbreaks of aggressiveness are not due to the presence of other pathologies of the psyche.

How to deal with hot temper

Individuals suffering from excessive temper, complicate the existence of their own relatives. Any trifle can generate a violent inadequate negative reaction in such subjects. This complicates the interaction with colleagues, acquaintances, relatives. Excessive temper often leads to discord in family relationships. Thus, an inadequate negative response to impulses from the outside harms privacy and interferes with career growth.

In order to understand how to get rid of hot temper, you need to deal with its nature. Any manifestation of emotions is the response of the nervous system to the stimulus. Inconsistency in the individual indiscretion in statements, sharp outbursts of anger, peremptory disagreement in absolutely everything that is happening around are often a result of nervous overstrain. Therefore, if excessive hot temper is generated by these factors, then a banal rest, a full sleep or a hobby will help get rid of it.

When an individual is faced with serious life troubles, any minor incident can provoke a single outbreak of aggression or become the source of the birth of more serious illnesses. Therefore, psychologists say that negative emotions must be given a way out, otherwise they will aggravate the condition. The individual will plunge inward and begin to cultivate a hatred for the environment. There is also the danger of reincarnation of excessive temper in an inseparable trait of character.

Since hot temper in psychology is considered a dangerous condition causing disturbances in the functioning of the body systems, it is necessary to deal with uncontrolled outbreaks of aggression.

Sport, especially its varieties associated with high physical activity, has a special effectiveness in preventing outbreaks of aggression. Sports activities contribute to the elimination of excessive nervous tension.

It is also not recommended to neglect the elements of self-hypnosis and banal auto-training. Exercises are quite simple in execution, but the effect comes quickly. To achieve a faster result, it is recommended to combine these exercises with elements of breathing exercises.

In addition, you should create a rule not to respond instantly to phrases or actions that cause anger. It is recommended to pause before a response statement or action. You can mentally count to 5. Literally in a few seconds, the irritation will subside slightly, as a result of which there will be no outbreak of aggression.

It is also recommended to diversify their own existence in order to saturate it with positive emotions. It is necessary to get out more often with relatives to nature, go to cinemas, meet friends, read literature. We should not exclude the hormonal genesis of excessive temper. A qualified endocrinologist will help to get rid of the episodes of aggression here.