Main Topics:

Irritability – A Common Anxiety Symptom

Irritability is a common symptom of anxiety – especially anxiety attacks. Those with severe anxiety often find that they're easy to upset, and unfortunately this means that those close to you both literally (as in distance) and figuratively (as in close partners) are at risk for causing you to lash out because of this irritability.

In this article, we'll explore this type of close irritability, including why it occurs and what you can do to reduce it.

Irritability = Anxiety?

Anxiety attacks often make you extremely irritable in ways that are hard for you to control. This irritability is not you; it's what comes from you trying too hard to manage your anxiety on your own. Learn to cure your anxiety forever starting with my free anxiety test.

Start the test here, now.

Types of Close Irritability

Anxiety causes you to feel negative emotions often. If you haven't taken my anxiety test yet, you should take it now to understand how it affects men and women just like you.

It's not unlike depression, where your mind is genuinely altered to have not necessarily negative thoughts, but worrisome thoughts that make it hard to cope with daily life. Many people with anxiety are "in their own head" 24 hours a day, trying as hard as they can to feel happier again.


There are two types of close irritability:

  • Physically Close – This is when you become more irritable when someone is nearby. It's the reaction to feeling like you are without space to do this on your own, or like there is someone around you that is causing you more pressure and possibly making your anxiety worse.

Both of these have similar, but ultimately different causes:

Physically Close


In some cases it is internal. You may simply be embarrassed that you are suffering from so much anxiety or afraid that the person will see it and judge you. Some people simply become more stressed when they're in anything that appears to be a social situation.

In some cases it's external. You may find what they're doing annoying in some way, like loud chewing. They may smell or be invading your personal space. Normally these are things you would be able to shrug off and ignore, but when you are dealing with so much anxiety it's not uncommon to find that the anxiety makes you angry and upset at the person, even if you don't know them.

Emotionally Close


  • You may find that it's stressful that they don't understand what you are going through.

You may also be far more prone to stress over the smallest criticism, in a way that is unfair to you and unfair to them. When you struggle with daily anxiety, it's not uncommon for you to be barely hanging on and depend on your emotional partners to help you through it. So when they make even a slight criticism, it makes you feel much worse than it would if you weren't suffering from intense anxiety.

Fear of being irritable can also increase irritation. If you've found yourself easily upset at a partner in the past, it's not uncommon to be on edge any time your partner is near and you are suffering from intense anxiety.

The key thing to remember is that anxiety isn't just worry. It's the tendency toward negative emotions, along with physical and mental symptoms that make it hard to find life easy to manage.

How to Respond to the Irritability of Anxiety

Irritability is something you can partially control. Irritation from those that are physically close to you requires you to simply learn to accept your own irritation and not act on it. As long as you don’t lash out, there isn't that much harm. If you find yourself irritable, take a deep breath and remind yourself that anxiety is what's causing it. If you can, get up and move. If not, you may need to deal with the irritation and then focus on reducing irritation another day.


  • Communicate Always – You may be embarrassed or ashamed when you have anxiety, but the person close to you needs to know. This is especially true if you are having (or think you are about to have) a panic attack. Tell your partner. Don't let them guess, and make sure that you are open and talking about everything that you feel. Part of the irritation is from keeping it all inside and having your partner invade your space. Communicating ensures you are not doing that.
  • Apologize Quickly – As soon as you realize you are being easily irritated, apologize. The longer you sit and get upset with yourself, the more you'll fear irritation in the future and become more likely to be irritable. Be honest as well – make sure you tell your partner why you are irritable.

These aren't going to stop the irritability, but they are going to help reduce the extent that your irritability affects you and those around you. You'll still need to cure your anxiety if you truly want the irritability to go away.

I've worked with many irritable people in the past whose anxiety caused them to be emotional quickly. You have to start with my free anxiety test, which will look at your symptoms and give you tips and tricks for controlling it forever.

Start the test here.