Friday, February 28, 2014

Too little, too much

Working internationally gave us a chance to review our thinking on 'enough'.  Enough food, shelter, education, employment, health care, ....  enough is good; it makes the difference between a gracious existence and a daily struggle for survival.  Moving along that line, where does it become too much?  

Children, particularly the youngest, can be misshapen by wealth and privilege.  It can do too much for them and leave them without the life skills they'll need. Keeping their stuff organized, taking care of their clothes, household tasks, interacting with adults, and prioritization among demands, all are learned first as a child.
Or not.

If a child is given everything they fancy and more, what does that teach them to expect?  Will life disappoint and discourage them? Will they spend their adult efforts on 'having' things instead of 'being' anything?  Is having 50 pairs of shoes a noble goal?

If you have money in the bank, clothes in your closet, a place to live, and food in your fridge, you're in the world's top wealthiest 10%, by the way.

These west African children and their families (pictured) are living on the edge of 'enough', but interestingly, they're an extraordinarily gracious culture. Children relate well to adults, they participate in discussions and decisions, and they share the family workload. They have the skills and insights to participate in community, and they work hard to do well in school. Their community has virtually no crime or violence, and children are safe anywhere. It's not an easy life, but it has none of the fail points common in the developed world's raising of children.

From the developed world,  a mother talks about her journey through the issue of excess with her children, "I equated giving them stuff with making them happy, a message that our consumer driven culture hammers into our psyches from the time we our born.  Oh, what a lie!"  See  Why I took my kids’ toys away

Does more stuff make us happier?
Is there such a thing as 'too much'?
What's the goal?

Recognizing that our children can be warped by wealth, are we curious what might be happening to us as well?

Parents 'Trapped in Cycle of Too Much Stuff and Too Little Time for Kids' Says New Unicef Study - See more here.