Hiding a Pregnancy From the Father
UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE SPEAKER: I was 12 weeks pregnant and the father was someone I had met during my summer abroad. He did not know I was pregnant and I had no plans to tell him. I only know Nick`s first name and occupation. He could have a trust fund or a criminal record. The unknowns are too great. Instinctively, I knew I was going to keep the baby and keep Nick in the dark.</s>PINSKY: Back to my special co-host for the evening, Lisa Vanderpump. Sam is with us. Jax Taylor from Vanderpump`s Rules. He is the bartender at Lisa`s restaurant served, and Anahita is back with us. It is time for our click fix. Lots of action on social media regarding this story. Should a woman who gets pregnant during a one-night stand tell the father about the pregnancy and the baby? We heard about this in a blog on Yahoo!. Sam, give us more details.</s>SCHACHER: OK. So, it was written by a woman who is calling herself J.L. Scott, Dr. Drew. And, she talks about how she went to visit Dublin, Ireland, over the summer. She met this guy in the bar. They have a one- night stand. She was not using her birth control. So, they had unprotected sex. Even though she took the morning after pill the next day, well, a few weeks later, oops surprise, she is pregnant. She also goes on to talk about the fact that she made a decision that she will not tell the father that she is pregnant nor tell the father about the baby when the baby is born.</s>PINSKY: OK. Lisa, my question to you, first op, is she morally obligated to tell the man about this pregnancy?</s>VANDERPUMP: I think so, yes. I think she is guilty by omission. I think she should use the best endeavors to find the father. He is 50 percent of that child. Imagine the shock, 18 years later when the child comes -- I know myself, how I would feel. I would feel devastated if suddenly, you know, a child turned up and I had a fair warning. I think absolutely you should be enlightened.</s>PINSKY: Jax, do you agree with your boss?</s>JAX TAYLOR, CAST OF VANDERPUMP RULES: Yes, I do, on this subject. Whether or not the child is going to be part of this man`s life, he should know. I mean this is -- it could go either way but I really think the father should know.</s>VANDERPUMP: Easy there Jax, because you are going to have tons of women now chasing after him.</s>PINSKY: Oh, really? Well, better than hundreds of 18-year-olds in 18 years coming after him, I suppose. Anahita, could she be illegal trouble for not telling him and does this man have any fiduciary responsibility to the child?</s>SEDAGHATFAR: I do not know that there is a legal obligation here, Dr. Drew, but obviously a moral and ethical obligation. What kind of mother is this woman going to be? She goes and has a one-night stand with a stranger. She does not use protection. She then lies to him and says, "I was on birth control" and now she is deciding she does not tell the child that he is the father of her child? That is totally beyond selfish. And, like what Lisa was saying, I mean even if you do not have an obligation to father of the child, what about your daughter, you unborn child? At some point she is going to want answers. She is going to ask questions, who is my dad? Why was not he part of my life. This child is going to be damaged in one way or another by her mother making this decision.</s>PINSKY: And, Jax, I see a look on your face, a real seriousness. You are nodding as Anahita is talking. You agree with her.</s>TAYLOR: Totally. I think it is -- the daughter is going to want to know at some point like where she came from. And, the fact that she was unaware of any of this, just because the mother was so selfish not to say anything. Absolutely.</s>PINSKY: And, Lisa, what if she lived in the vicinity -- even this father is overseas somewhere, does it even make it more immediate, more important that she find this guy?</s>VANDERPUMP: I understand that. This is obviously not an ideal situation, but I think that absolutely, wherever the father is, she has -- when she heads into that situation -- I know everybody makes mistakes. Of course they do. But she is obliged to tell him. She is obligated to her daughter, to her son because it is -- it is just part of life, you know, that is -- I am sorry. I have got such strong feelings.</s>PINSKY: You feel very strong. I get that.</s>VANDERPUMP: I really do. I really do. I think it is selfish to do otherwise.</s>PINSKY: For our viewers, if you like more of HLN, you can take us live with you wherever you go. Get our HLN To Go app. It is available for Apple products and Android devices. We will be back in just a second with Lisa, Jax and our panel after this.