Stephen Garner felt a lot older than he thought he should . The years and the failures had caught up to him . He looked down at his work - worn hands . At 56 years old , his body was broken and his spirit wasn 't too far behind . If he had just been 10 years younger , he would have rallied . Once upon a time , those hands could have saved the farm . But nothing could help him now . He had lost the farm , lost everything he had worked for . And now his wife was dying . The best he could do was to stay alive to take care of Ella . He was unselfish in his prayer for continued breaths . He knew his wife depended on him so much . She depended on him to say their morning prayers because she had forgotten them . She depended on him to bring her meals to the little room where they now lived in their daughter 's house . He fed her because she had forgotten how to eat . She depended on him to keep her warm in the night and to understand so many things that she could no longer understand . And Stephen did understand . He loved Ella through all of it . He felt himself being used up , consumed by the situation , but he never wavered in his love for her . She had been that beautiful young girl who had just glanced across the church aisle at him when he was young and vibrant and well . She had waked in him all the love and devotion a young girl could cause a young man to have . They had been young and happy and their children had had enough to eat and life was good . Their life together had never been rich but they weren 't poor either . The Lord had always provided . By the sweat of his brow , he had helped the Lord provide for his family . And on Sundays , he and Ella and their three children took up most of a pew at church . He rubbed the tight pain between his eyes and looked over at his wife . She was sleeping . She had forgotten all of those times but he remembered them . Sometimes he wished he could forget too so he wouldn 't really know how much they had lost . Stephen and Ella were penniless . They had lost the farm . Stephen ached remembering the day the bank came and took the farm away . They just weren 't able to keep up on their payments . Now , he and his wife were at the mercy of whichever of child would take them in . Thank God for the generosity of their oldest daughter Lela and her steadfast husband Walter . Stephen smiled at the thought of their kindness . It was a bittersweet smile . He would have rather been in his own home and not tucked in the corner of his daughter 's house . But his children were good to him and Ella . Walter took care of the roof over their heads and Lela made sure they ate . Stephen was sure there was never a better pair than those two . " What you doin ' , little girl ? " Stephen asked , opening his arms and inviting her into his lap . She smiled and ran to him , giggling quietly . She was only five , the youngest of seven children . Stephen could see her little heart , and it was as big as the earth itself . Unlike the other children , Hazel had a restless spirit . She longed to go to school with her sisters , but since the time wasn 't right yet , she always found her way to Grandpa 's lap with stories she had seen around her . Hazel looked up at her grandfather like she was shocked . " Well , she is 15 , " she said . " She 's gotta get married soon so she can have babies ! " " Heaven help that boy , then , " Stephen said . He knew what kind of woman Opal was going to be . She would be insufferable , but whatever boy would have her would never know it until after he had married her . Stephen didn 't like to get into the parenting affairs of Lela and Walter , but he knew they struggled sometimes . For one , Lela spoiled Opal and gave her whatever she wanted . And on the other hand , Walter had a weak spot when it came to disciplining his children , especially the boys . He left everything to Lela . Stephen knew , then that it was better for him and Ella to take their meals in their little room by themselves . Ella didn 't feel like eating much of the time , but Stephen knew that she just didn 't feel like talking or being a part of the chaos in the main house . So , they stayed in their room much of the time when the entire family was together . There were times , though when Stephen went to the kitchen to sit with his daughter while she prepared the meal for the day . They talked often about the trials and tribulations of raising such a large family . Lela never relaxed . She made Stephen tired to watch her dart about her kitchen looking for ingredients to make a new meal each day . Lela was only 37 , but she looked 50 . Stephen thought they had made the right decision by staying in East Texas , though . He didn 't think his daughter would fit well into Walter 's family . His brothers were fast talkers , fast dealers , and there was nothing Christian about them . It worried Stephen that his daughter and her children might be unduly influenced by these people and turn out to be infidels . He was humbled and love filled his heart . " Thank you , Miss Hazel , " he said . He would later take the flower to Ella , but for now he stuck it in his pants pocket . At the mailbox , Stephen went through the letters . His sister had written , but he would give that letter to Lela . Lela handled all of the family communication . Truth was , Stephen wasn 't too good at writing . He could never write down all that had happened to him . It was better not to talk about it or think about it . He did open a letter from Washington , DC , though . He didn 't know anyone in Washington . Hazel leaned on him , tired from the walk , so he bent down and picked her up as he opened the letter . Stephen opened the letter and shook his head . " Wouldn 't you know it , Hazel ? Those fat cats in Washington are asking me for money ! That president in with all the money in the world is asking me for money ! " Stephen looked at his granddaughter and then back at the letter . It talked about some new program that was meant to help people get on their feet when they couldn 't work anymore . The idea of it struck home , made him wish something like that had been in place when he had been forced to leave his farm and livelihood . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . Jewel was one of two sisters that lived in Fort Smith , Arkansas . Opal was the other . The two women were rarely seen without the other , so it was a surprise when Hazel heard only Jewel on the other side of the door . It was especially disconcerting because she was rarely demanding like that . That was usually a job left to Opal . " Opal 's not far behind me , " she said . " She brought her own car so she could stay a few days longer . " Jewel paused and raised her eyebrows with a look that said , " Sorry ! " Hazel laughed at the commiseration . They both knew how difficult Opal could be . They had known it their whole lives . You might say that having to deal with Opal gave them something in common . It had kept them close all these years . " I need to tell you something before Opal gets here , " she said . " That 's why I 'm so flustered . I didn 't want Opal to hear me . " Laurie was Opal 's favorite , above everyone else in the world . Up to this point , she had always been beyond reproach . In fact , most days , you couldn 't get a word in edgewise for all the talk about Laurie : Laurie had gotten a raise at her job . She had gone on a date with a medical student . She had attended the symphony with her church group . There was really no end to all the good work that Laurie was doing . Hazel wondered what could be so bad that Jewel would race ahead of their sister in order to have a private conversation . Already , Laurie had stunned Opal by moving away to Dallas as soon as she graduated high school . Hazel couldn 't think of anything worse than that . She remembered watching Laurie grow up and Opal talking about her granddaughter 's future as if it were her own to decide . She would have a small house in Fort Smith and marry a Christian man who would emerge from the small house every morning with his briefcase with Laurie standing at the door with his coffee and a kiss . And then Laurie and her husband would have a sweet little great grandchild that Opal could cuddle in her arms . She had even talked of their living with Opal so Opal could be of assistance with the children . When Laurie moved away , it had stunned and hurt Opal deeply . " My word , " Hazel said , putting her hand to her mouth . " Did she marry a Baptist ? " Her eyes widened as her mind tried to guess what could be so bad . And then she gasped . " Did she marry a … Catholic ? " She could barely get out the last word and when she did , she whispered it . She knew that would be worse than anything in Opal 's mind . Everyone knew how her sister felt about church and other churches . Hers was The One True Church , the church without instruments , the church without separate Bible classes . When anyone asked Opal about her beliefs about Bible classes , Hazel knew that Opal would consider those people as feeble minded . And she saw it as her duty to teach them . " God did not say , ' Go off and put yourselves in different places to worship me ! ' He said , ' Everyone must be together to praise me ! ' " She was quite passionate when she would relay this to anyone who challenged her on it . When pressed where in the Bible she got her information , she 'd shrug and say she couldn 't remember exactly where it was , but she knew it was there and far be it from her to dispute the Word of God . So , as her children had children , Opal made it clear that those grandchildren must marry within the church - her church . They should never even think about dating anyone outside the church . Marriage was hard enough without being unequally yoked , she 'd say . A car drove by outside and both women jumped . They looked back through the front door as if expecting Opal to be standing there listening . Hazel was relieved to see that the car wasn 't Opal 's and she wasn 't standing there . " Laurie called a while back and told Opal she had cancer , " Jewel said . She took a Kleenex from the box and dabbed at her eyes . " You can imagine how Opal received that news ! It was terrible ! " Hazel remembered Opal recounting how , on the night of his death , he had called while he was on the road . She had wanted to say hello to her son , but she had been in the bath and , by the time she got out and dried off enough to go to the phone , Lloyd had hung up . She never got to say goodbye or anything . She had always wondered if Bruce had meant to confide something to his mother , something important that he 'd never get to say . So she blamed Lloyd until he , too , died some years later . Laurie was Bruce 's only child . When she came along , Opal took care of her on the auspices of helping out , but really she had wanted to be with her favorite son 's child . She could see Bruce in Laurie and that was as close as Opal would ever get to her son . It helped Opal cope with Bruce 's death , but Hazel knew that her sister had taken all the dreams she had for Bruce and pinned them on Laurie . Jewel nodded . " Opal went to Brother Bailey in tears and asked if the church could have a special drive to help Laurie with her cancer treatments . And he was quick to agree to it . He told Opal that 's what the church was for - to help in times of need ! " " That is so kind , " Hazel said . She warmed to the new minister 's generosity and thought maybe he had finally started filling the shoes of the previous minister . It had been hard on the congregation when Old Brother Leon had a stroke and it took a while for them to take to Brother Bailey . " Opal was making plans to go to Dallas , " Jewel continued . " She wanted to take care of Laurie herself . They talked every night on the phone , so much so that Opal had to work out a payment plan with the phone company ! Her phone bills went sky high ! " " Laurie didn 't want Opal to go , " she said looking up and blinking her eyes . " She said she 'd rather call and give daily reports , which she did . It did such a number on Opal to not be there and know how to be helpful . She prayed , of course , but she was sick with worry . " " That 's Opal , " said Jewel . " I have to tell you quick then . Opal found out last week that Laurie didn 't have cancer at all . Never had it ! It was all a scam to get money ! " Hazel started to stand to go to the door , but she felt light - headed and had to sit back down again . The breath escaped her chest and she felt all the sadness , misery , and embarrassment that Opal must have felt this last week . She could barely believe that Opal 's own granddaughter would do such a thing ! After the second ring , Hazel managed to get to her feet and shuffle to the door . Tears clouded her vision , so it took her a moment to get the door opened . Before Opal could even get over the threshold , Hazel pulled her into a big hug . Opal burst into tears herself and she practically melted into Hazel 's embrace . And then Jewel joined them . The three sisters stood in their familial triumvirate and wept in unison . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . Albert sat at his sister - in - law 's kitchen table reading the Fort Smith newspaper . His wife , Hazel was busy cleaning up the lunch dishes . He figured they had about another minute 's peace and quiet before Opal , his sis - in - law , started up again with her constant demands . There it was . Opal couldn 't keep quiet longer than twenty minutes before she needed something new . For about a week she had been lying in bed nursing her gall bladder surgery for all it was worth . Albert had wished some other sister had been available to stay with her while she healed up , but Jewel had a job and Cleo was in Houston visiting the new grandbaby . That left his wife to do all the heavy lifting with their oldest sister . " That woman , " Albert said under his breath . He watched Hazel dry her hands on a kitchen towel before heading down the hallway to Opal 's bedroom . His wife had this soft way about her . Even her steps were soft and gentle , though he also noticed they were always full of purpose . He knew whatever Opal wanted Hazel would give her . Sometimes he wished she 'd just tell her sister to stuff it . But then , she wouldn 't be his Hazel if she did that . " Nothing … nothing . It 's just , I noticed there 's a lot of dust up there on the door frame , above the door . I hadn 't noticed it before , but just lying here makes me see things from a different angle . Would you get a dish cloth and try to get all the dust off that frame ? " " Who does she think she is ? " He whispered , leaning forward again . He had to resist the urge not to hit the table top with his fist . Albert pretended to be reading the newspaper when Hazel entered the room again . He knew his marriage had always been a point of contention between his wife and Opal . It didn 't help that Opal knew what he thought of her marriage to her dead husband Lloyd . Albert had liked Lloyd , but he thought he had always been a spineless jellyfish and let Opal walk all over him . One day he told this to Hazel and Opal overheard . You would have thought he had accused his sister - in - law of genocide . She laid into him like a cat chasing chickens . They had steered clear of each other ever since . " Oh , Hazel ! " It hadn 't even been five minutes since Opal called her sister back to the room . " I think the baseboards need cleaning too . " " You didn 't come here to do her housework ! " He said through his teeth . " Tell her to get her old fat butt out of bed if she wants anything else dusted . " He stood up , ready to go tell Opal himself just what he thought of her . Hazel walked over to him and put a hand to his chest . She looked up at him with pleading eyes - the eyes he fell in love with . " I 'm going for a walk , " he said , finally , stepping around his wife . In three strides he was out the door . He slammed it so hard the entire house shook . He didn 't actually go for a walk right away . Instead , he sat on the front steps for awhile to try to calm down . He watched the birds skittering and chirping around the bushes in Opal 's front yard . Under the windows along the front of Opal 's house , he noticed some shrubbery needed trimming . He would have already trimmed them if they were not Opal 's shrubs . He liked to stay busy . He was never happier than when he could stand back and look at a job well done . But he simply would not let himself do it . If he did that , it would open up all kinds of expectations from his sister - in - law . She would ask him to paint her house and put a new roof on and build a new shed . It would never end . Opal 's house was the last house on a dead - end street . Albert looked around , thinking about the implications of that . It made him smile . He certainly felt like her house was a dead - end whenever he visited . " Heck , no ! " Albert bristled . " She 's my wife 's sister . Opal 's had some surgery and my wife doesn 't drive , so I had to bring her . " Albert rubbed his big heavy hand through his hair . " If it was up to me , I 'd already be gone back home . That woman wears on me like nobody else ever has . " The man leaned closer to Albert . In a confidential tone he said , " That woman has been a sore spot to all us neighbors . Most of the men in the neighborhood won 't even go out in their front yards anymore . She 's always out there hollerin ' from her front porch . You can only pretend to be deaf so long ! She doesn 't give up and she doesn 't take a hint . " Albert cackled in commiseration . " Oh yeah . She would never take a hint . You 'd have to scream it in her face . Even then she might not get the message . " Opal 's neighbor pointed to a house further down the street . " See that house there with the flag pole ? That 's Ralph Martin 's house . He 's been forbidden by his wife to go anywhere near Opal . " The man shrugged . " I don 't know if it 's true , but it seemed like Ralph was running to the house every other day to look at the faucet or the refrigerator or any little thing to get him over there . His wife Millie had enough and put her foot down . " Both men looked at each other for half a second as the image of Opal the Seductress sunk in . Then they both started laughing at the same time . Tears sprung out of Albert 's eyes he was laughing so hard . Albert continued on his way and , while he walked , he wondered why God had even made people like Opal . It seemed to him that she served no real purpose , except to make the people around her miserable . Albert supposed that her husband Lloyd had loved her , but she was 16 when they married and he figured she was nicer back then . The thing that bothered Albert most of all about Opal is that she did not know unlikable she was . She could at least have a little humility . Albert 's thoughts went further back in the past , then . He thought to the time when he had been courting Hazel . He got dressed up every time he went to a family supper over at her house and her parents gave him the once - over more than once . He always felt claustrophobic when he visited . Hazel 's entire family was so proper and pious . He tended to like people who were more down to earth and didn 't think so much of themselves . Opal was by far the worst of the worst . She played the piano after suppers and the family would gather around and sing . Albert hated it , but he endured it because he loved Hazel . Albert scratched his head trying to understand Hazel 's family . Hazel and another sister , Jewel , used to say that their mother would 've been happier if she had had Opal as her only daughter . He never understood that . He never saw anything attractive about her . He almost hated her for the way she treated Hazel . Opal was exactly the kind of girl he would never have looked at twice because she already thought she was so pretty . He would much rather be married to that sweet , kindhearted Hazel . Sure she sometimes wore her heart on her sleeve , but she always tried to do the right thing . Albert figured it probably wasn 't easy to be Hazel . Sometimes he felt sorry for her . Once they were married , he didn 't plan to spend much time at her family home , if for no other reason than to give Hazel a break from trying to measure up and take care of everybody . " Opal is having a hard time , " Hazel said . She gave him a second look , like she was trying to figure out why he was smiling . " She , uh , needs you to go and get her some more pain pills and the pharmacy closes in about 30 minutes ! " Albert looked at his wife 's plaintive face and his heart melted . He could never tell Hazel no about anything , even if it was to help that harridan , Opal . He knew that his wife was such a goodhearted person and that he didn 't really deserve her . She went out of her way to keep things calm , keep everyone happy , make sure he had what he needed . He didn 't say a word as he got in the car and drove away , but he did look in the rear - view mirror . As he drove up the road , he noticed that Hazel didn 't budge from the porch . He was pretty sure he 'd never forget this moment , or that look of confused happiness she gave him just after he had kissed her . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . Minnie had put a chicken and a ham in her oven early that morning . She would serve this along with seasoned greens , potatoes , garden vegetables , cornbread and rolls , and several choices of desserts . And then there was always Neapolitan ice cream in her freezer . Minnie reassured herself that she had made a scrumptious and appetizing lunch for her special guest , her niece , Julia . Minnie had several nieces from both brothers . Julia was one of them . She was 19 years old , the picture of youth and beauty . Minnie was so excited to have her niece visit for a week . Her visit was the closest Minnie could get to her beloved baby brother , Leon who had died suddenly a few years back when he had suffered his second and last heart attack at the age of 45 . Minnie had no idea why both her brothers - who had children - were taken so young when she was left childless and alive . She resented the injustice of that . It wasn 't that she had a death wish , exactly . It 's just that she had bothersome thoughts that she had let all her nieces down by allowing their fathers to die so young . She felt she was somehow responsible because she had outlived them . She would have gladly died instead of either one of them . But they were both gone and here she was was left to try and make their daughters as happy as possible . With everything just about ready for Julia 's visit , Minnie felt content enough to take a few minutes to sit down and relax . That is , relax as much as Minnie ever felt safe enough to relax . She sat in her recliner in the corner of her living room and chugged back a Tab soft drink until the can was almost empty . She was like her father that way . She could almost drink an entire soft drink without stopping for breath . This was especially easy for her to do when she was nervous , and that was most of the time . Minnie looked at all the food she had prepared and looked back at her skinny niece . She wondered if she had prepared the kinds of things that Julia would eat . She didn 't want Julia to get skinnier ! Or maybe Julia was still grieving her father 's death . There were still many days when Minnie could not bear to think that Leon was gone from this earth , never to sit at her dining table again , never to keep everyone entertained by his stories , never to talk to her again in that special way that only he and Minnie had . He had been her touchstone , someone who would always understand . Minnie dabbed at her eyes thinking back on these things . Leon had kept alive all of the family times they both remembered . He remembered her when she was young . He saw all of her and loved her anyway . He knew her secrets and her fears . He also remembered how impossible their mother had been . Sometimes , Leon would hold Minnie 's hand while she poured her heart out to him about all of her sadness and he would listen attentively . She knew he was really listening ; not pretending to listen like other people . She got relief and consolation from those visits . It was as if she could breathe again . The night Minnie got the call about Leon 's death she had run up and down the road in front of her house screaming . She felt so alone , so frightened . She was not only scared . She was angry . She didn 't want to go on living in a world without Leon . Minnie wiped her eyes and looked again at her niece . She was reading a book . Minnie squinted to make out the title - " Narcissus and Goldmund . " Minnie had never been much of a reader outside of the Bible and book in which someone overcame great adversity to win in the end . She had to read books like that . She had this hope about her own life - that maybe , if she was good enough , wise enough , and nice enough , her life would at least end well . Minnie wanted people to love her . It was all she had ever really wanted . She had worked her fingers to the bone , said her prayers every night , went to church every Sunday , baked hams for bereaved families , lived a life that had no dark spots , and yet , she wasn 't a happy person . When she lay down to sleep at night , her worry never stopped . She laid on her back with her head on the pillow and her hands on her belly . Her worry was visible in her thumbs as they went round and round each other . Sometimes , if the night was worse than most , she got up and went in the living room to read . She had had some kind of heart problem since she was 18 . The doctor had told her to think twice about having children . She hadn 't said anything at the time , but in her mind , she was thinking - not much chance of that . She was relieved , then , when a knock came at the door . She was even more relieved to see her Kelly standing there . Kelly was another niece from her other brother . She was 16 years old and reminded Minnie of herself . She was so eager to please and didn 't want to let anyone down . Minnie thought for sure that everything would go well with Julia now that she had someone more her age to talk to . It was clear after a few minutes , however , that Kelly felt just as self - conscious as Minnie did in front of Julia . Before long , they were all three silent in the little living room . The window air conditioner whirred on , its fan ticking away the excruciating minutes . Minnie looked from Kelly to Julia and back to Kelly again . She tried to get Kelly to say something , anything , to entertain her guest . But Kelly shrugged and her eyes were wide with uncertainty . Even so , Minnie detected Kelly 's own discomfort . Or maybe she was just uncomfortable enough for the both of them . She watched Kelly shift in her seat , look up at Julia , and then look back down at her book . Then Minnie looked over at Julia and wondered for the first time how long she had been reading that same page . She worried they had disturbed her too much . Maybe she couldn 't concentrate because of them . Finally , though , it was too much . Minnie couldn 't take the silence anymore . Julia could read her book any time , but she was in Minnie 's care now and Minnie wanted her to enjoy herself . " Kelly , why don 't you and Julia go for a walk ? " Minnie said . The words tumbled out of her mouth in a burst of impatience with the whole situation . Sweat ran down her face at having spent the last few minutes racking her brain trying to come up with something . By the time an idea finally occurred , she had crossed the line from worry into complete misery . She felt no choice but to blurt it out . Minnie watched her two nieces walk out of her yard and down the gravel road . It was a road Minnie walked almost every day . Despite her weight problem and inability to follow a diet more than a day , she did try to offset the damage to her heart by walking a little each day . There was a tree about half a mile down the road that she would walk to and then she 'd turn and walk back . She knew - or hoped - the girls would walk farther than that . She worried for them , though . What if a pack of dogs or a car full of boys or a hunter with a gun came along and threatened them somehow ? Minnie took a few tentative steps off her front porch . She thought about following the girls on their walk , but she knew she would never be able to keep up . Instead , she stood on the porch and waited for them to come home . The two cousins walked down the gravel road to the tree Minnie walked to each day . The only sound between them was the crunch of the gravel beneath their feet . Kelly 's earlier attempts to engage her cousin had been met with shrugs and more silence , so she decided it would be on Julia to break the silence . Kelly took the time , then , to think about their Aunt Minnie . She looked back toward the house and saw their old aunt standing on the front porch . She looked so earnest and kind of pitiful , even from a distance . Kelly looked back at her cousin and wondered why she was always so quiet . She was pretty sure that her mother had told Julia how to feel about their aunt - maybe she had told her how to feel about the whole family , even Kelly . She wondered if Julia realized how much Julia 's mother had sabotaged her relationship with everyone . She wondered if she knew how much their aunt loved her and how much she wanted to please her . In the past , before Julia became so silent about everything , she had told Kelly how brainwashed people could be . Kelly had wondered if this was a way to break her out of her own Minnie - imposed prison , to save Kelly from the same worries and pressures that Minnie put on herself . At the time , she admired Julia for saying these things and trying to help her not be like Minnie , but now she wondered if Julia knew how much she , too , had been brainwashed by people like her own mother . It 's not that Julia 's mother was mean , especially not to Kelly , but she had always kept an arm 's distance , just like Julia was doing . Minnie loved all of them , especially Julia 's mother , Kate , if for no other reason than because Kate was Leon 's wife . Kelly didn 't think the love was reciprocated on the part of Kate , but she would never say that to her Aunt Minnie . During one of the visits Kate and Julia made to Minnie 's house after Leon had died , Aunt Kate had sat in Minnie 's living room knitting . Kate was beautiful , just like her daughter , and very accomplished . She was so different from anyone Kelly had been around , including Minnie and her own mother . Kate was a principal at a grade school . Her evenings were taken up with all kinds of activities and classes that would further her education . If that weren 't enough , Kate was elegant in appearance . She wore her hair in a style that would 've been impossible for Minnie . There were combs and pins involved in her hair - do , whereas Minnie had curly , unforgiving hair . She had given up on such a style long ago . During their visit to Aunt Minnie 's house , other relatives had been called by Minnie to celebrate their visit . The living room was filled with family . Minnie had invited all the nearby relatives and even some from further away . She was never happier than when she could get a bunch of relatives together . Kelly looked from her Aunt Kate to her Aunt Minnie . Minnie was beaming , but Kelly knew she would never take her aunt up on such an offer . She suspected her aunt knew this as well - that the offer was merely to win points with Minnie and not genuine . And of course , Minnie would never suspect such manipulation . She was completely innocent of guile or duplicity . Uncle Leon had taught at the university in Knoxville . Kelly tried to imagine how it would be to be able to say her last name in a place where that last name was a good name , a respected name , an important name . She wouldn 't have to stammer and be bashful about her last name because of what her brother had done to their name . Kelly thought about all the times people looked at her when they realized who her brother was . There was always a look of judgment , always a sense that they had put her in the same box with him . It was a hard row to hoe , as Minnie would have said . Kelly thought of Minnie then . Maybe they weren 't so alike after all . Whenever Minnie had come across a snake , she went into some kind of trance . Her husband had always had to rescue her whenever it happened - and , living in the country , it happened at least a couple of times a year . She would stand in the yard and scream , but she couldn 't move . Kelly felt distantly responsible for Minnie 's fear of snakes . After all , it had been her father who had terrorized Minnie with them . If Minnie could be at fault for not having died in the place of Kelly 's father , it stood to reason that Kelly was at fault for Minnie 's phobia . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . I succumbed to the spiritual pressure to be baptized on the first night . I didn 't trust waiting until the next night . A lot of things could happen in a day . I didn 't want to take any chances . Back at the little church in Appleton , though , it was like seeing the same movie over and over . It was always the same . I knew what would happen next , but still I watched . " You know Beulah 's funeral is tomorrow , " said Mrs . Morton . " Could you bring a pie to my house ? I 'll have Frank take it over to her . " There was always a funeral and always a pie needing to be made . Aunt Winnie always agreed to make it or whatever food was necessary to help out the grieving , hurting families . She also went to every funeral service . It 's what people did . Mrs . Morton nodded . " She was looking so much better than last time I saw her . I 'm so glad she doesn 't need that walker anymore . " Aunt Winnie 's mouth dropped open like she was trying to get the words out but she couldn 't . Finally , she whispered , " Are you sure it wasn 't someone who looked like my aunt ? Maybe someone far away ? " Mrs . Morton didn 't seem to notice Winnie 's surprise . " No , it was her , " she said . " We talked a bit when we were looking at the plums . " Winnie nodded and smiled a weak , confused smile , but she said nothing more . Her husband was walking up to the podium just then , so time for talk was over . Still , she seemed so shocked to hear that Aunt Emma was walking without a walker that she leaned forward to look over me to my mother . " Let us pray , " my uncle said . He bowed his head and closed his eyes . " Dear Lord , may the speaker of your word have a ready recollection of thoughts . May those thoughts move someone today to turn their life over to you . And please bless the hands of the women who are cooking for our bereaved family … . " I took a chance to open my eyes and look over at Winnie then . She was the one who was always pitching in and helping . My uncle had to be talking about her . I wanted to see if I could tell that she was proud of what he had said . But she didn 't seem to be listening . Her head was bowed , but her eyes were opened . She was looking down at her hands and she seemed troubled about something . My uncle finished his prayer . He repeated his concern for the lost souls of the congregation . When he said " Amen , " I looked around at the few dozen people and wondered who he thought was lost because we had all turned our lives over to God , even me . Did he know someone 's inner miseries that the rest of us didn 't ? Was he trying to reach them ? It was time to sing then and we were asked to stand . Most of the congregants were past sixty . They groaned as they forced themselves from the comfort of the wooden pews . While we sang , I noticed my aunt watching the cows in the field out the window . She continued to do this throughout the sermon . I looked at the back of Mrs . Morton 's head and wondered if Winnie was upset about what Mrs . Morton had said about Aunt Emma 's walker . I didn 't completely understand , but I knew she was worried about my other aunt for some reason . A few days later , Winnie came for a visit . She sat at my mother 's kitchen table , and she told her what Mrs . Morton had said . Mother seemed shocked as well . Mother shrugged and shook her head . " I can 't imagine . I 've never seen her without that walker . To go this long just pretending ? " I 'm not sure what Mother thought of when she heard this , but I had to put my cookie down because I was imagining Aunt Emma with gum or peanut butter or some other sticky substance all over her head . The thought of it made me want to laugh , but Aunt Winnie was so serious that I knew better . So I picked up my cookie and stuffed it in my mouth to keep from giggling . " Her hair is jet black now ! " Winnie said . She seemed almost angry , but I knew the look on her face was more about worry . " Hazel , I think she used shoe polish on her hair ! " " Even if she goes into a nursing home , she 'll expect me to visit everyday . I guess a home isn 't going to change that . But there 's a limit to what I can do , Hazel . " I wouldn 't admit this to anyone , but I loved my youngest child so much more than the others . I tried to be fair , but it was so hard at times . When Winnie and Albert came along , I didn 't think I could love anyone any more than I loved them . And then Travis arrived and I realized he had been the child I had truly wanted all along . I was 22 when Winnie was born . It was a laborious birth . I stayed exhausted mentally and physically for so long . My neighbors and the church ladies came often to give me time to nap or they would bring a casserole to the door . They assured me that things would get easier in time . I waited a long time and it never happened . To say it bluntly and truthfully , Winnie was not a pretty little girl . Sometimes I looked at her and asked myself how this could 've happened . When I found out I was going to have a baby , I was so happy . I didn 't really think that much about what the child would be like . My daughter had soulful gray eyes that watched me constantly . She had my swarthy complexion and seemed to be frightened of something even as a baby . She didn 't cry much , though . She would just lie in her crib , wide awake , for hours . But she didn 't cry . The closest I could come to describing her emotion was that she was worried . Always worried . I felt sorry for her even before she could crawl . I didn 't know what I could do with her . I made her dresses of lace but she looked ridiculous in them . I tried everything . Her hair grew out to almost waist length . On any other little girl this would have been helpful . It just made Winnie look older . She was not like other children so there was no use in hoping that she would find a group of girlfriends at school . My sister Dollie had a baby girl six months after Winnie was born . Dollie came all the way from Slaton , Texas to spend a few days with us right before the holidays . I didn 't understand how my sister had been able to travel with a baby that young . It wasn 't something I could do . She and I put Winnie and her daughter Christine in the same crib , but Christine crawled away from Winnie as fast as she could . Still Winnie just sat there and never complained . My daughter was an old soul . As she grew , she began to be a good child . She was probably the best - behaved child anyone has ever met . People marveled at her social graces . She liked people to be happy with her , to appreciate her . I could already imagine the life that she would have before she became a teenager . It made me sad . I didn 't know how to even talk about this with anyone . Winnie was four years old when I saw everything so clearly . It was about this same time that I found out that I was going to have another baby . I gained over 50 pounds in my second pregnancy . I was so miserable the entire time . I couldn 't sleep , I was nauseated a great deal of the time , and I wondered how on earth I could gain so much weight . At times it seemed that the baby that grew in my womb was already warring against me . The child did not rest peacefully inside me . I knew he would not be like Winnie . I secretly hoped that might be a good thing . I knew that he would have a lot more spirit and a lot more fight than Winnie ever did . By the last few months of my pregnancy , Winnie had taken over many of the household chores . I took one look at him and immediately knew who he looked like ! He was the spitting image of my father , John Gamble . People would remind me often of this - thinking that it made me happy that my child looked like my father . It did not make me happy . From the very start , Albert was the opposite of Winnie . He demanded attention and wanted more of everything . He watched me with those dark brown eyes and I tried to feel something positive about him . I held him and changed his diapers and gave him food and took good care of him , but I could tell - he didn 't like me . As Albert grew , he looked so much like my father that I almost couldn 't stand him . If it was just his appearance that bothered me , I might get past that . But he had the same blustery presence . Albert walked into a room and I was suddenly on edge . I got the prickly sense that he could see completely into my soul and I always looked away . Sometimes he didn 't say anything at all . He just looked at me with disgust . On numerous occasions , I asked my husband John if he thought we should discipline Albert in some way . As always , he chose to have no real opinion . He wasn 't even aware of the fractured relationship between Albert and me . I loved John with all my heart , but we stopped talking like we used to . We didn 't even talk at all most days . Everybody just wanted to get away from me . It was hard to know these things and not understand how to change them . I can remember how much my husband and I loved each other in the beginning . Nothing made me happier than to see him coming toward the house after work knowing that he wanted to come home to me . When he saw me standing at the stove cooking our supper , he would stand behind me and put his arms around me , and tell me how happy he was with his little wife . I was little back then . He could almost encircle my waist with his hands . It wasn 't long before I wasn 't little anymore . I didn 't see any of it coming . The change in my appearance happened gradually over the years . Suddenly I had to extend my dress patterns to accommodate my widening girth . I saw the other women at church looking at me , noticing , wondering why I had let myself go . All of my sisters and my one brother managed to take life in stride so much better than I did . I don 't know why that is , but it is . If I had not had my sister Emma to laugh with in my childhood , I don 't know what I would have done . Emma could make me laugh in the midst of the worst times of our lives . She could somehow turn things around and make me feel so much better . When Emma lost her baby girl , though , she was never the same . I didn 't know what to say to her during this time . She did not cry hysterically . She just got very quiet . Her husband didn 't help much either . He had always been the strong silent type . I could imagine the silence in their house being almost palpable . That 's about the same time Emma began to think of her cats as if they were her children . No one dared to say anything to her about this . We were all very happy that she could find solace in the company of devoted cats . I often wondered if other mothers and wives felt like I did . I never broached the subject with anyone , though , because people didn 't do that . Any one of those church ladies who sit by me at the fellowship dinners and showers at church would stare at me in shock if I had asked if she really liked her children . It was a social necessity to at least pretend you liked your own children . My sister , Dollie , seemed completely taken by her baby , Christine . Dollie always looked pleasant and seemed positive about everything in general . I wanted to ask her how she did that , but I didn 't ask her . When I thought of Dollie , I thought of her face lit up with a smile . I knew that wasn 't what people remembered about me . There were days when I woke in panic and an icy cold fear in the pit of my stomach . I knew this wasn 't normal . I was hemmed in on all sides by fear , but I could see in other people 's eyes that things would go a lot better if I didn 't mention any of this . I didn 't think that we would have any more children . Albert was seven and had grown even colder toward me than he had as a young tot . Sometimes my father came to see Albert and take him fishing or he invited him to the domino hall . I didn 't want my son to be around my father but my husband thought that having his granddaddy around was good for our son . Then I found out that there was going to be another child . Winnie was so excited . I think she might have been more excited than me . She was eleven years old . I was 33 years old when my third child was born . I didn 't know if my body would let me carry another baby . I was young when the other two were born and neither of their births were easy . I envied the women who talked about giving birth as if it was like breathing . Especially after the first one , it was all supposed to be easier . But it was never easier for me . Travis was born after four days of hard labor . When I was going through this experience , it was the first time I got angry with my husband . How dare he get pleasure at the price of my pain . Even if it did result in a sweet little baby , I swore I would never go through that ever again . My husband sat by the bed and kept a wet washcloth on my face to help distract me from the pain . I thought it would never end . When the third day of labor dawned , I began to feel desperate . I thought something should be done but I didn 't know what . Winnie stood in the corner of the room watching me with those gray eyes . They were as big as saucers . Then early in the morning of the fourth day my third baby arrived in a mighty swoosh . For just a moment , I could relax . My husband put the baby on my chest , while he helped clean up . I thought Winnie might be in shock because she didn 't move - even after the baby was born . The new baby rooted around on my chest and settled in nursing . That is when I fell in love with him . He was a baby boy but already I could tell that I loved him in a way I had never loved Winnie or Albert . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . Joe was silent for a long time . She thought for a moment he had fallen asleep and it made her angry in a way . How could he sleep when their oldest son had just died ? Joe wasn 't asleep , though . In a monotone voice she could barely hear , he said , " He was 19 . What were we supposed to do ? " They both broke down again , Joe turning away from Marjorie . She knew he didn 't want her to see him so broken . He was a cop . He had seen the worst of things . He was always the strong one . Meanwhile , Marjorie just lay on her back and cried into the empty air . The world she had thought she had such great control over yesterday spun out of control when the phone rang at two in the morning . She didn 't have to be told something had happened . She knew . She had been out on the porch waiting for their son Harold to drive around the corner . He was never late . He was a good son . She managed to smile then , thinking about her child . Harold wasn 't like so many of the young people they saw with long hair and a general air of rebellion . He kept his hair short and well groomed . He was especially handsome that summer he had a buzz - cut . She couldn 't remember for sure which summer it was . They all blurred together now . Harold had always been thin , almost too thin . Marjorie thought about how he lifted weights every night in his bedroom to try to build up his arms and look bigger . She almost laughed remembering him take on a boxer 's pose to show them how much his muscles had grown . Up until yesterday , their lives had all been so good . Marjorie and Joe had good kids - three of them , though now there were only two , she remembered . She tried to remind herself that the other two were good kids too . Bonnie was so smart . It seemed especially cruel that her daughter was so successful in school but she didn 't have any real friends . Up until yesterday , the greatest heartbreak Marjorie had experienced was seeing how cruel other girls were to her Bonnie . She had tried to help her daughter deal with the weight that caused her so much grief , but it always came out wrong . It always seemed to make Bonnie think that Marjorie saw her in the same way those mean girls at school did . Harold and Bonnie looked a lot like Joe , but their youngest , Jerry , looked like Marjorie . She smiled when she watched him playing out in the backyard as she cooked . He truly was a beautiful boy . Her heart was lighter when he was in the room with her . He reminded her of her older brother who had died of pneumonia when he was in the army . Being a mother of three , Marjorie thought she had seen it all . There were days of chicken pox and measles . Jerry had to have a tonsillectomy one winter when he stayed sick for months . And she had come very close to tragedy on other occasions with her children . A car had hit Jerry when he was nine . Marjorie recited the story to the other policemen 's wives more than once . She had heard the squealing tires , the yelling , and she knew . Mothers just know sometimes . She knew something had happened to Jerry , and she rushed down only to find his body on the pavement a few feet from the car . She had run to comfort her son , but a man standing nearby grabbed her and held her back and told her that she could hurt him worse if she moved him . The ambulance arrived and she had climbed on board to go with him . She prayed and begged God not to take her Jerry away . And he hadn 't . Jerry recovered with only a tiny scar across his forehead as a reminder of that awful day . She thought she had seen it all by then , but as another wave of sobs rattled through her she started to think that all the other days before had just been part of the routine . Yesterday might have been the last truly normal day she would ever have . Harold had not been spared as Jerry had before . He had simply been walking his girlfriend to his car across the parking lot when a drunk driver spun out of control and slammed into him , sending him flying 30 feet . There 's no way he would have survived . Marjorie played out in her mind every detail of that last day she had with her son . In some way it seemed like it had happened years ago already . Maybe that was what shock did . It made time twirl and tilt until you weren 't sure what was real and what wasn 't . Harold had been home all day . He had been working on his car . He got his clothes all greasy and then he got all spiffed up to go out with Susan , his girlfriend . " You sure do , " she had said . She dried her hands on a towel and turned full around to get a better look at him . He had on a short sleeve cowboy shirt and jeans that she had ironed with great care to get the creases in the front just like he liked . And he wore his black cowboy boots . " You worked hard for those boots , " she told him . She had felt so proud of him for working so hard on a paper route to earn the money for those boots . " You and Susan are going to have a good time at the rodeo , I think . " She laughed and shook her head before walking back to the sink . It was a joke between the two of them . He knew she always waited up and she knew he would always come home . He had before . Marjorie thought of her mother then . She had been gone for several years , but Marjorie 's heart ached now to have her mother hold her . They could cry together . Harold had been the first grandchild . She had ridden a bus all the way from Pascagoula to spend a week with them and help out with the new baby . It had been such a special and happy time for all of them . It was in this moment , in the midst of all this pain , that she realized she had no one to turn to like she would her mother . She felt lonely . There were no real women friends she felt close to . She had had friends in high school , but they had all drifted apart . Church didn 't offer much in the way of comfort then either . They went to church every Sunday , but people there didn 't really say much to each other about daily sadness , much less horrific tragedy . They smiled and waved and clapped each other on the back and pretended everything was fine . Sometimes Marjorie wanted to call one of the ladies in her church circle . She wanted to ask her if she ever felt depressed or lonely for no reason . But Marjorie never did that . The only other social activity she had was the Policeman 's Wives Auxiliary meetings every other Monday night at the community center . There were folding chairs set up in rows and the wives listened to someone talk about budgets and city ordinances for about twenty minutes . Then they 'd eat tiny pieces of coffee cake and drink coffee while the children rushed to a table set just for them to get a cookie . Joe 's movement pulled Marjorie back from her thoughts . He sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed . He didn 't look at Marjorie or say anything for a while . He looked like he might be holding his breath . She forced herself to sit up and get out of bed . She shuffled to the kitchen where she could look out the back window to the garage . Joe was there . He was just standing in the middle of the yard looking at the spot where Harold always parked the car . She had ended up in that spot the night before after the phone rang . Joe had taken the call . She had watched his face turn white and she knew . Her heart had stopped and she had screamed until Joe had come and folded her in her arms and told her their son had died . She barely heard anything after that . She knew someone had told her that Harold 's girlfriend was okay . She knew that someone had said Harold had been a hero to push Susan out of the way at the last minute , but she could not really hear or see or feel anything after she had been told her son was dead . Her voice trailed off when she saw the police officers standing in front of her . Their eyes were puffy and red and she wondered why they should be crying when it was her son . But then she remembered - they were Joe 's friends . They were men she had known since she married Joe . They loved Harold almost as much as she did . Marjorie figured she fainted then . She may have screamed before as well . She woke up who knows how long after . She was on the bed and Joe was next to her . She looked him in the eyes and wept as she prayed out loud that it had just been a nightmare . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . I didn 't have time to worry about Momma 's shock and her sudden discovery of Pearl 's condition . Momma looked so odd sitting at the table with her mouth open trying to absorb what all had just happened . The three younger children had put their forks down completely ignoring the meal Momma had made , even though it was everyone 's favorite . I put my arm around Pearl and walked her back to the bedroom . Pearl was barely in bed when Momma came charging into the room . She was hysterical . " Grace , " she cried . " We got to call the amblance people ! Run across the field to Lillibelle 's and see if she can call them ! " " Oh Lordy , help us now in our hour of need , " she said . Tears were streaming down her face . The hands she lifted into the air were shaking . " I call upon the Great God of heaven to come and save this … my errant child . " " Go to Lillibelle 's , " I said . " Call Reverend Samuels . He 's the only one with a car that might take mercy on us and drive us to the colored hospital over in Tilton . " Mother stared at me as if I had grown horns . " What you mean , girl ? I ain 't gonna call my reverend for something like this ! You think I want the church people knowing what 's happened here ? " It took a couple of seconds for the impact of Momma 's words to sink in . When they did , I had to sit down next to Pearl on the bed . I felt gutted . Was my own sweet mother more concerned about what church folks thought than her own daughter 's life ? " Momma , forget the church people , " I heard myself hissing at my own mother . " This is your daughter ! We need Reverend Samuels ' car . If he has any soul at all he 'll see us as we are . We 're all sinners - he knows that ! He 's our only hope , Momma . " To my shock , Mother left us only to reappear just before the reverend arrived . Her hair had been combed out and she had lipstick on . But no amount of makeup would hide her hysteria . She shook like a leaf and , before Pearl passed out , she wailed with Pearl 's every sound . The boys led the reverend to our bedroom . He had taken off his coat and hat before he got there as if he was there for a prayer meeting . His face told me he hadn 't expected what he got . " You hear that , young lady ? " Momma said , her voice a little shaky but not hysterical . " We got to do the best we can . That means you too . " " I think she 's about four months along , " I said . Now I understood the shame Mother had felt moments before . Speaking it out loud like that to someone of Reverend Samuel 's stature made me feel so ashamed . " Alright then , " he said . " I already took the liberty of calling Mercy hospital to let them know we 're coming . I didn 't know how bad it was - just thought it might be pneumonia or some such . " Grace Washington is a part - time contributor to Jet Planes and Coffee . Like many of our writers , she is from Texas with roots all around the South . Her stories often uncover the realities and courage of those who fight for justice . In the aftermath of my father 's death , I spent a good deal of time trying to blend into the wallpaper , especially whenever big conversations happened between the adults . The rug had been pulled out from under me when he died . Nothing felt safe or real . Being unseen gave me the advantage of hearing things most eight - year - olds wouldn 't get to hear . If the adults didn 't notice me , I could learn what was really going on . " Momma , all you would have to do is sign the papers ! " My brother John had been ranting all through dinner about papers he wanted our mother to sign so he could be released from the Army . " I don 't think I can stand it anymore and now I have a real shot of getting out , thanks to Daddy dying . If you sign these papers , I 'm free ! " I felt cold hearing my brother talk about Daddy that way . It was like he was happy our father had died . I couldn 't risk moving , though , to feel the actual shudder that crept into my shoulders . They might see me and send me out of the room . I looked over at Mother . She was at the kitchen sink working away on the cast iron skillet she had used to make fried potatoes for dinner . Her shoulders slumped at the same time mine felt frozen . John leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest . He was only 18 but he was like a bull in every way - broad chest , stubborn nature . He was also full of mischief and if there was one thing he bucked against the hardest it was rule and regulations . Even I knew the army was full of those . It was like watching a tennis match in a way . John sitting there waiting for Mother to cave , Mother leaning her body further over the sink , as if she might crawl into that greasy , soapy water and get lost in it . Who would crack first ? John brought his heavy fist down on the table so hard it made the spoons jump . Momma and I jumped too . She dropped the skillet into the sink . I held my breath . " So I guess you 're not even going to look at these papers , then ? " John asked . His voice was irritated but I saw a little curl on one side of his mouth . He saw me watching him and his face changed completely . I heard Momma sniff before she lifted the corner of her apron to her eyes . My stomach hurt wondering why she was crying . Was it because of John ? Or because Daddy wasn 't here to help her deal with John anymore ? I looked back at my brother and imagined what it would be like if Daddy had been here . There would be no talk of leaving the army , that 's for sure . I might have been Daddy 's Little Girl , but I knew things were different for John . He had felt the harsh side of our father 's moods more than anyone and it always seemed my Mother was there to try to make up for those moods . Back in the kitchen with Mother and John , I felt myself blinking back tears . I didn 't want to be discovered and sent out of the room by myself again . I pretended to be a statue and forced myself not to cry . By now , Mother had fished the skillet out of the sink and she was drying it off . I caught her looking at John from the mirror above the sink . I could see in her eyes she was weighing what was best and I could tell from the way John sat up in his chair that he thought he was making headway with his case . " Momma , did I tell you about the poor guy I had to sit with out in the desert ? " John lit up another cigarette and took a deep drag . His fingers fiddled with the papers in front of him . " He was only one year older than me . We were doing maneuvers out in the desert . The sand blew in our faces every minute and it felt like needles piercing our skin . " John looked back at Momma 's reflection . She wasn 't looking at him anymore . She was wiping down the countertops . Her brow was furrowed with forced concentration . " The kid had a fever I think , " John continued . " He was just so out of it those last few days . Maybe he had a heat stroke . I tried to contact the sergeant with my walkie - talkie , but I couldn 't reach him . " John looked over at me then . He flashed a grinchy grin and then he went on with his story . I jumped because I didn 't think he knew I was there . " And then some knucklehead cut him right in half with a tank ! Can you imagine ? His intestines were sprawled out everywhere ! All I could do was light a cigarette for him and help him smoke his last one . He died right out there in the sand . " Without meaning to , I squeaked . It was all too gruesome to imagine . There was a look in John 's eyes that told me he was making up the whole thing , but the way he told the story made me believe him . " John ! " My mother spun around and stared at him for the first time since the conversation started . " Your sister is eight years old . Don 't you think she has seen enough horror for awhile ? " John 's eyes glittered with mischief and I knew his story wasn 't over yet . I wanted so badly to close my ears , but if I did that I 'd prove I wasn 't ready to be in the room with the adults and I 'd be sent away again . I sat stock still and looked at my brother with pleading eyes . I looked away from John then . I couldn 't take it anymore but I knew better than to jump up and run to Mother . I couldn 't risk being sent to my room now . John smiled . I couldn 't believe he could smile after telling such a terrible story . And poor Momma . It upset her so much . John had a way of doing that whenever he was around . " Momma , look , " John said . His voice was calm now and easy , like someone soothing a wild horse . " None of this army stuff is going to help me . How can making my bed perfectly and shining my shoes until my face shines in them make any difference to anybody ? " " I 'm going out for awhile , " he said . He slid the papers he wanted Momma to sign over to her side of the table . Without another word , he walked out the door and into the night to who knows where . The quiet that followed was almost too loud . John 's large presence - and his horrible stories - still rang in my ears . I was relieved when Mother took notice of me . Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . The one item she questioned the most was the pair of yellow stretch pants she had bought the week before on impulse . She had thought they might be more practical to do the work of packing up Cleo 's house , even though she knew the church did not condone women wearing pants . She figured that perhaps in this situation , church folks might cut her some slack . When she went to pull them back off , though , they were too tight . She started to panic as she pulled and pushed to get the blasphemous apparel off . In complete desperation she ran down the hall to her sewing room and cut them off . Once relieved of the pants , she took great pleasure tossing the pieces into the garbage bin . She thought about Hazel , her sister who lived in the same town with Cleo . Right after Neal had died , Opal had wondered why Cleo hadn 't asked Hazel to help her . It didn 't take much thinking on Opal 's part , though to know why . Hazel was afraid of her own shadow . After her husband had passed away all those years ago , Hazel never recovered . She was barely equal to all the surprises life had handed her . She had nothing left to help Cleo stay afloat . Opal frowned thinking about this sister whose husband had so recently passed . In her heart she had never liked Cleo 's husband , Neal . In all her memory , she couldn 't remember a single word he had uttered to her . For this , she could never forgive him . It was rude not to talk to your own sister - in - law . Besides that , he was just odd . When the call came a month ago that he had passed , she had thought about not even going to the funeral , but her sister had wanted her there , so she went . Now , though , Cleo needed her to clean up the house and help her settle in as a widow . And when duty called , Opal was the first to answer . The folks at the church in Fort Smith had been so accommodating when she told them about her family 's loss and her sense of duty . Brother Brown , the minister , had been especially kind to Opal during this time of need . He was a fire and brimstone preacher who delivered his sermons with a nasally Arkansas lilt . In times like these , he always found the right words of comfort . Opal had nodded at these kind words with furrowed her brow , clutching her watch necklace . It was a gesture she always did in sorrowful times . In that moment , though , she didn 't have the heart to tell Brother Brown that she was only half sure Neal was in heaven right then . She simply thanked the preacher and told him that she looked forward to joining her brother - in - law someday . The car dinged when she opened the door and she rolled her eyes . There was a time when the only noise a car made came from the engine . She decided she would like to go back to those days . She could do without the racket . It was going to be a sunny day . She leaned over the wide berth of a front seat and dug her clip on sunglasses out of the glove box . She looked in the rearview mirror and decided it was a good thing she was doing . Besides being a help to her sister , she knew she , Cleo , and Hazel would have some high old times remembering their childhood . While she waited for a table , Opal noticed a family nearby whose children seemed better suited for the jungle than a public diner . Parents had no idea how to raise children these days , she thought . If those had been her children , they would 've sat in their seats and been quiet and still . Now , though , people acted like they were afraid of their children , afraid to discipline them , afraid to even tell them no . What she hadn 't counted on , though , was how small the bar stools might be . She hefted herself up on the stool , but there was more of her hanging off to the sides than was on the stool . She shifted her body to the seat next to her and distributed everything across two stools . It never occurred to her that her seating arrangement might be amusing to the other customers . She had stopped trying to explain her weight to anyone . Everyone who knew her knew that she ate like a bird . She often looked at her sisters , who were not fat , scarf down huge meals like wolves . Opal had just come to accept that her weight was just another injustice she had to endure . Sitting there all alone , she had the impression that this trip seemed longer than it usually was . Maybe it was because on most of these trips to Texas her sister Jewel had been with her . Jewel wasn 't all that interesting , but she would 've made the trip easier for Opal by just being someone to talk to . She listened intently to the news stories as she continued toward Denison . She was thankful when she heard the shooting had taken place somewhere besides Texas . Once she knew this , she turned off the radio . Opal took in the scene of bargain hunters picking over the junk overtaking the whole front of Cleo 's house . She had forgotten how Cleo loved to haggle over things . She often wondered in these moments how she and Cleo could possibly be sisters . This feeling alone made Opal want to get back in her car and drive down the road . But she watched Cleo and suddenly felt sorry for her . Cleo would never be the pillar of strength or the definition of cleanliness and organization that Opal was , but ultimately they were sisters and this bond alone kept Opal from leaving . She was there to help Cleo become stronger in her time of need and , if she could , teach her to be a little less cluttered , more organized - like she was . Opal didn 't even have to look at her sister to know tears were already streaming down her face . She could feel the sadness pour through her . She felt the pent up worry and fright that Cleo must have been enduring all this time . It took them half an hour , but the two sisters worked together to get all the boxes , containers , and fold - up tables back into Cleo 's house . Opal bit her tongue to keep from making editorial comments on the items her sister felt proud to offer for sale . From what Opal could see , it was just a bunch of ridiculousness . It wasn 't until they had gotten Opal 's things from her car and had started to settle in that she realized her sister had left off cleaning at all . She wanted to say something . She wanted to point out that Neal would never have liked living in these conditions , but she didn 't think it was the right time , so she kept her mouth shut . Other than that , she kept her mouth shut out of respect for Cleo 's feelings . She almost lost it , though , when they came to the bathroom . Two birdcages sat in the only tub in the house . There was no shower - this is where Cleo would bathe . Opal had wondered when they had hugged earlier , when Cleo had last bathed . The birdcages confirmed her fears . " Is this where they stay all the time ? " Opal asked . She took in shallow breaths to keep from breathing in the smell of bird dung that permeated the room . " I could think of lots of places they could be , " Opal thought to herself . But again , she held her tongue . Cleo was still suffering , she thought . Give her time . It was almost too much , though , when they came across their mother 's crocheted ecru tablecloth . It was torn all along the edges . Pieces were just dangling from it . Opal wanted to pull the tablecloth to her and cry . She remembered their mother working on it for hours with hopes that it would be cherished and passed down for generations - and now it was in tatters , beyond repair . Opal felt her blood pressure rising . When she had agreed to help Cleo get settled , she didn 't imagine this level of disaster . Even with the contents of her three suitcases , she had not come prepared . She thought of her suitcases and wanted to cry . All the clothes , all her belongings were going to be tainted with the smell that seemed to follow her everywhere she went in Cleo 's house . It was a combination of mold , rotting food , and bird or cat mess . When she reached the kitchen , Opal found the source of at least two of those smells . Littered across the floor were dirty plates . There were several cats sitting on the countertops and the table . One was on the floor cleaning the leftovers off a plate . " Oh , I just let them come and go . They 're neighborhood cats . " Cleo pointed to a hole in the screen door that led out to the back of the house . The cat purred in Cleo 's arms . Opal suddenly felt sick . This was a new feeling for her . She was the rock that held everything together . This , though , was too much . " What should we have for supper ? " Cleo asked Opal . She set the cat down next to a plate of picked - over chicken bones and then started rummaging through the cabinets . " I , um , I saw a restaurant a few blocks away we could go to . " She surprised herself by the lack of conviction in her voice . She usually always knew what she wanted and was never reserved at saying so . Cleo laughed . " We can 't go there . They close at five . " She opened the freezer and started rummaging through a thick block of frozen things that had been there for who knows how long . " I 've got some corndogs in here somewhere . Would you turn on the oven ? " Opal tried hard to focus on her sister . It was a rare thing for her to be shaken like this . She kept reminding herself she was there to help , but she was just beginning to wonder if Cleo could be helped . " Found ' em ! " Cleo said , holding up a flimsy box of corndogs . She turned and looked at Opal with a smile . " I 'm so glad you 're here . " Karen Brode is a senior contributor Jet Planes and Coffee . She grew up in Denison , Texas and graduated from Denison High School in 1972 . She took courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University and worked in a church office for 25 years . She and her husband , Gary , have been married 39 years and they have one son , Brandon . Karen 's hobbies are writing , sewing , and gardening . Post was not sent - check your email addresses ! Email check failed , please try again Sorry , your blog cannot share posts by email . % d bloggers like this :