I was stuck walking home from school , in the rain . My little brother had basketball practice . Since I am being punished , mom won 't make the trip to pick up just me from school . So I wait or I walk . Waiting is boring . So is walking , but at least its doing something . So I walk . My mom was always the master of the cold shoulder , the silent treatment . She 's no slacker with the guilt trip either . But her weapon of choice is the silent treatment . That 's what she has been dishing out at me for weeks . Maybe even a month now . In all of my 16 , almost 17 , years I have dealt with the silent treatment from my mom countless times . Most of the time it only lasted a few hours or days at the most . This was the longest by far though . It was how she had always punished me . My little brother never gets punished like that , but he is mom 's golden child . He can do no wrong . Though being my mothers daughter I had ways of dealing with her odd punishment . I use to pretend to not notice or even care that she was ignoring me . Sometimes had one sided conversations with her . I would say something then change my voice to mock hers then reply . I could pass hours doing that . At least until my dad came home from work and ask me to leave my mom alone . Sometimes I could get her to break her silence and make her talk , no yell , at me . Yelling is better than silence , right ? Mostly she would decide on her own when I had enough punishment and then act like the whole thing never happened . This time , though , It seemed like there was nothing I could do to break her silence . It was to the point that my whole family ignored me . I can not , for the life of me , even remember why I am being punished . Anyway as I made it almost home the rain came nearly to a complete stop . Just my luck . I was mad . It was way to cold and raining far to hard for my mom to be acting like this . She should have picked me up at school . I stomped my way up the stairs , across the porch , opened the door and slammed it behind me as a entered the house . Mom was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea . She looked towards me with cold eyes then looked away . " Look at me ! I 'm soaked ! You couldn 't have picked me up ? " I yelled . She flinched at my words but said nothing . I slammed my backpack down on the table . The tea in my mothers cup sloshed from the impact . It splashed up on her hand . She immediately jumped up holding on to her tea soaked hand . " Damn it ! " She said . She ran to the sink and started running water over her hand . " Damn it ! " She said again this time as a harsh whisper . I felt relieved . She was talking to me again . Well , yelling . But it 's better than silence . I stepped closer to her as she stood at the sink , water running over her hand . It was then I realized two things . One , the tea was hot enough to burn her . Pretty badly . Two , when she swore she was not talking to me . She was swearing about the burn . She looked in my direction but her eyes would not meet mine . Her face was full of shock and fear . I felt like shit . I burned my mom because I was taking a fit about being rained on . I hated my self at that point . I looked around the kitchen . The mug and the spilled tea was still on the kitchen table . I decided to try to make it up to her . I grabbed a sponge from the sink and headed to the table . I wiped up the spilled tea , took the mug to the sink and washed it with the other dirty dishes . After that I wiped down all the surfaces in the kitchen , tidied up the living room , and went looking for something else to do to help out . After folding laundry and some other chores I went to my room . I was not sure how long it had been since I fell asleep doing homework , but I could hear car doors slam and my brother 's exited voice coming from outside . I got up and went downstairs . I wanted to see that mom was ok . I stood on the stairs as she came in , my brother Cody following behind . She walked right passed me without even a glance in my direction . Her hand was bandaged where the tea splashed it . My stomach tightened at the sight of the bandage . I followed her in to the kitchen . She quickly glanced around taking in the cleaning I did while she was gone . I was hoping she would say something about it , but she didn 't . " Mom . " I said walking toward her . She turned to look in my direction but she never looked right at me . " I 'm sorry about the burn . " I said . She just walked away . I was so angry . I was angry with my self for causing her burn and for doing whatever I did to be punished like this . No matter how hard I tried I could not remember what I did to be punished . Thinking about it made my head hurt . But I was also mad at my mother . Whatever it was that I did wrong could not be bad enough to ignore me for so long , or to make my dad and brother ignore me too . I sat on the stairs going to the second floor . I just wanted to stay there in the middle of the house . I wanted to make it hard for them to ignore me . Time rolled by as I sat there , I seemed to lose track of it . Soon I heard someone on the porch and the door swung open . It was dad . " Hey , Dad . " I said , not really expecting a reply . Dad sort of glanced in my direction but didn 't say a word . I noticed his face . He looked so thin and pale . His eyes were sunken in to his head and he had huge bags under them . He looked like a terminally ill person . He bent over to take off his shoes . I reached out and touched his thin , pale face . He didn 't seem to notice at first , but then his hand came up and he laid his over mine . A tear filled his eye and threatened to spill over onto his cheek . " Dad , I am so sorry . Will you please just talk to me ? " I asked . He slipped off his shoes and walked away . I was left sitting there feeling hollow . " I did that . " I said . My parents shared a strange look . Dad shook his head as if to clear his thoughts , grabbed the paper , and headed to the family room . Mom started working on dinner . I sat back down on the stairs and watched my mom make dinner . It wasn 't long before dinner was done . " Dinner ! " My mom yelled . Cody stormed down the stairs and made a dash for the table . He was the first one seated . Dad came in slowly and headed to the table . Mom put a casserole dish on the table and took her seat . Finally I got up and made my way to the table . I went to sit down when I noticed there was not a place set for me . No plate , silverware , glass or napkin . I stood there looking at my mom . How could she do this . This was low . I pulled my chair out long and slow , so it scraped across the floor loudly . My little brother Cody looked my way , surprised . My mother put a hand on top of his . He looked at her , she gave him a small shake of her head . He just nodded and looked down at his plate , pushing his food around with his fork . I sat in my chair and watched my family eat . I wasn 't even really hungry . But I wasn 't going to make ignoring me easy . I got up , stomped across the kitchen , opened a cupboard and got out a glass . I filled the cup with water from the tap , stomped back to my chair , placed my glass down with a thump and sat down hard with another thump . I sat sipping my water thumping my glass on the table between each sip . My family looked more and more uncomfortable . " How did it happen ? " Dad asked with concern , no longer trying to fake small talk . Mom looked at dad then glanced in my direction then back to dad . He looked at her with disbelief . He sort of looked in my direction with disgust . I felt horrible . I hated when my dad was upset with me . " We need to do something about this . " he added . Hearing his words I felt sick , like my chest was being crushed and my stomach twisted . I hurt my mom and now dad was even more angry with me . I was always a daddy 's girl even now that I am almost 17 . No matter what I did wrong , or how mad mom got with me , dad was always there for me . I sat quietly for a long time just feeling horrible . My family started a conversation while I was lost in thought . They were talking about Cody 's up - coming basketball game . I decided that I wanted to be alone . I had caused enough trouble today . I got up from my chair . Cody stop talking mid sentence . I dumped my water down the drain and put my glass in the sink . I loudly trudged my way up the stairs and went to my room , slamming the door behind me . I laid in bed . Hours passed as I go from feeling horrible for burning my mom , to being angry for how everyone is treating me , and back again . I suddenly realize the house was quite . My family must be a sleep and I must have lost track of time , again . I haven 't eaten much all day so I decided to get up for a late night snack . I didn 't even try to be quite in my way down stairs to the kitchen . Once I got there I turned on the light and went about raiding the fridge . Left over 's from dinner were front and center in the fridge . I decided to have some of that . Soon I was pulling out anything that looked good . I ate and ate . I didn 't bother cleaning up after myself . After a while I wanted something sweet . I checked the freezer and found vanilla ice cream . I knew there was milk and chocolate syrup in the fridge . I decided that it was time for a milkshake . It was after two in the morning but I really didn 't care . I filled the blender with ice cream , milk , and chocolate syrup and turned it on . I forgot to put the lid on so it splattered a little . When it was done I poured it into a tall glass , stuck a straw in it , and sucked it down . I finished my snack with a burp , left the dishes where they lay , and went to head up stairs . I looked back on the mess I made and I was pleased with my self . My mother deserved this mess for punishing me for so long . I wish she would ground me , make me do a million stupid chores , or anything but ignore me . The silent treatment was the worst . Making the rest of my family dish out her demented form of punishment was more than I could handle . They had a name for this in middle school . It was called being shut out . If you got shut out you had to hope like hell that it was just your friends or a certain clique that shut you out . You could always make new friends , or find a new clique . If the hole school tried to shut you out you may as well be dead . Being shut out caused extreme emotional and psychological distress . I felt bad , back in middle school , when someone got shut out . I wanted to reach out and talk to them . I understood what they were going threw from dealing with my mother . But speaking to or even giving an apologetic look to a shut out was social suicide . I just couldn 't do it . I could not stand the idea of being treated by my friends and classmates the same way my mother treated me . The way he said ' It ' , as if the word brought an unpleasant taste to his mouth , I knew he was talking about me . Who was he calling ? What was going to happen to me ? All this because of a burn ? Because I am being punished ? I tried to remember again why I was being punished in the first place , but my head throbbed . Suddenly my late night snack wasn 't sitting so well . I needed to lay down . I laid down on my bed and oddly I started to fall asleep . It was weird . I was so upset about what I heard I should not have been drifting off to sleep so fast . Asleep , I dreamed about strange things . None of it made sense to me . The dream was in almost total darkness . I could see a little , mostly shadows and diffused light . Though I could not see much I could hear what was going on . Like a t . v . with a broken screen . The images were impossible to make out but the sound was in tact . I hear what sounds like two girls laughing , then a metallic jingling sound , followed by two hollow thuds . I see bright lights , but I can 't make out any detail . I hear more laughing and some music while long lights seem to slide past my field of vision . Suddenly I see a set of the lights that seem to bare down on me still no detail just lights and sound . I hear a scream , a loud screech , followed by the sharp sound of metal being crushed . Pain washed over my body and everything became dark again . I woke in a cold sweat , but I fell right back to sleep almost immediately . Shortly after I was asleep the dream started again . It was exactly the same as the first time . The dream kept repeating with me waking covered in sweat , until I woke one last time and saw the soft light of the sun filling the sky outside my window . It was still far to early to get up for school but I didn 't want to have the dream again . I got up to get dressed . I opened my closet . All my clothes were gone . Not even empty hangers hung from the bar inside . I checked my dresser , nothing . I even went to my hamper , deciding to put on the clothes I wore yesterday for now , and it was empty too . This was unbelievable . How could my mom do this ? When would she stop ? Is she trying to destroy me ? Then it hits me . When did she have time to do this . It had to be while I was sleeping since the clothes I wore yesterday were gone . I wanted to scream and cry . I couldn 't take any more , but at the same time I couldn 't let my self break down . I thought about things for a while and then I decided to look in the basement for clothes . I was sure there were some of my clothes in the laundry I folded down there . As I made my way to the basement I decided that when I got to school I was going to talk to a school counselor about how I was being treated at home . I figured they would help mediate a conversation between my parents and I . Maybe things would improve . The worse case would be that they would take me away from my parents for emotional abuse . At this point the idea of being taken away didn 't really bother me much . In the basement I went threw the laundry I folded but none of it was mine . I looked around the musty room for clues . I found a stack of boxes neatly placed in the corner with my name written on them in sharpie . Under my name the word ' Clothes " was written . Both words had been penned in my mother 's handwriting . I dumped one of the boxes then another . I would take them to my room later . I quickly picked out a full outfit and changed right there in the basement . When I was done I went upstairs . I noticed the kitchen was still a mess . I thought that was weird . Mom got up in the middle of the night to box up and hide my clothes but she didn 't touch the mess in the kitchen ? It was weird . It nagged at me . My mom was a neat freak . She would have stayed up all night cleaning if she had to . Wrapping my head around this odd feeling about the kitchen and my clothes made my head feel fuzzy . Before I could put things together in my head I heard my parents alarm going off . They would be down shortly to start breakfast . I grabbed the last apple out of the dish on the counter and left . It was still too early for school , but I didn 't want to face my parents . I didn 't know why really . So I slowly wandered in the direction of school . I figured if I got there too early I could wait outside or maybe catch one of the school counselors before class . Either way I was just glad to be out of the house . Outside the world was wrapped in a blanket of fog . The street lights were on even though the sky was lit by diffused sunlight . I was halfway to school when I neared a bend in the road . I was looking down but I heard a car on the road coming toward me . I glanced up to make sure I was far enough off the road . The car had its lights on and I ended up looking straight into them . Instantly my head felt fuzzy and started to throb . Oddly , I could hear all the things I heard in the dream from last night . Laughing , two hollow thuds , music , more laughing , screaming , screeching and a metallic crunch . Pain coursed through my body . What was happening to me ? What did this mean ? I regained consciousness later on the side of the road . The sun was brighter , the fog had started to burn off , and the grass I was laying in was damp . I had no idea how long I was out . The sun hadn 't moved much in the sky from where it was when I left home . I must not have been out long . I got up off the ground but doing so caused my head to throb and my stomach to twist . After a few minutes I felt a bit better . My head was still fuzzy but I could finish my walk to school . What just happened to me ? I tried not to think about it but it was hard not to . The bigger question was why didn 't that car stop when I fainted , or whatever that was . Why didn 't any other cars that passed by stop either ? The more I thought about it the fuzzier my head got . I decided to leave it alone . I was almost to school anyway . When I got to school it was 9 : 25 am . I had missed homeroom and my first class started five minutes ago . I ran to my first class . I hurried through the door . The teacher looked my way with a confused look on her face . Someone was sitting at my desk . I glared at them but they ignored me . I decided to head to a desk in the back of the room . The teacher went across the room to the open door , I thought I shut it , and looked out to the hall . After a few seconds she shut the door and went back to addressing the class . Within minutes I zoned out . I heard nothing that went on in class . I spent the class deciding when I would have time to see a school counselor . I figured the best time to go was during lunch . Not long after the bell rang . In the hall no one paid any attention to me . I got bumped and jostled by the kids rushing around . I saw a few of my friends . I even called out to them , but they didn 't hear me . My next class was really boring . I just sat and listened to my history teacher drone on about some war somewhere , sometime in history . I couldn 't bring myself to care . So again I zoned out and lost track of time . I snapped back to reality with the sound of a tap on my desk . I looked around . The room was empty of students . My history teacher was reading at his desk . I hear another tap . I realized my friend Samantha was standing next to me . It hit me that I had not seen her in weeks , maybe longer . She moved to the desk in front of me and sat backwards on the chair facing me . I studied her face . She looked like she was ill . Her face was pale and she had huge purple bags under her hollow eyes . Her long hair hung lifeless and dull . Her normally piercing blue eyes were opaque and dead looking . She didn 't look anything like her bright and healthy self . " You don 't belong here . Not any more . " She said getting louder . I looked at the teacher . I figured he would come over to find out what was going on . When I looked though I saw that he was still just reading his book . She was starting to scare me . I had no idea what Sam was talking about . My head started throbbing and my brain felt like it was buzzing . I had no idea what to say to her . I went to ask her to explain what she was talking about but the bell rang . I glanced at the clock . Lunch time . How long have I been sitting here ? I figured I had to have missed a bunch of classes . Why didn 't the teacher say anything . How could I have ignored the bells and sat here all this time ? I turned back to Samantha but she was gone . I looked around . The only other person in the room was my history teacher and he was still reading . I felt so confused and my head really hurt . I remembered that I planned to go to the office to see the school counselor now . On my way out of the room I looked back hoping to see Samantha She wasn 't there though . I got to the office . It was crowded . A lot of students were waiting for different things . There was a form on the front desk for students to fill out what they were here for . I went to it as soon as another girl was finished with it . The form was lined and had three categories across the top . I started to fill it out . The first category was time . I looked at the clock on the wall and noted the time . Next was student ID number . I jotted mine down . Lastly was reason for visit . I wrote that I needed a school counselor . There was no place to put my name . I guess they wanted it to remain anonymous . I looked down the reason for visit column and saw that only two students were requesting to see a counselor . My chances of seeing one soon were good . I waited in the office against the wall waiting for my student number to be called even though the huge sign over the front desk said I would be pulled out of class when I could be seen . The bell for the next class rang before I had been called on . I wasn 't happy that they hadn 't got to me yet , but I knew they would get to me sooner or later . In the hall I was sure I spotted Samantha . I made my way to her but a tall kid blocked my view of her for just a second and she was gone . I sat threw my next few classes waiting to be called to the office but I was never called . I blew off my last class and sat in the office . I figured maybe I would get into trouble for skipping class . When I told them about my family I would be forgiven and they would see that I got the help I needed , but still no one called on me . I gave up when the bell rang again . It was time for homeroom . I was disappointed so I just left the office and headed to homeroom . I was wondering why I was never called on . When school was officially over I went outside . Cody was not sitting in his usual spot waiting for mom . I looked around and still didn 't see him . I looked over the cars waiting to pick up kids and my mom 's wasn 't one of them . I figured Cody had practice again . So I was stuck walking , again . But at least it was a nice warm day . It took me less that fifteen minutes to get home . When I got there my mom 's car was not in the driveway . She was normally home when I got in from school . Another car was in the driveway . My mom just got a new car less then a month ago and my dads was fairly new too so I was pretty sure my parents didn 't buy it . For a brief second I thought maybe they bought the car for me . They kept saying they would buy me one . I got my license about six months ago . I haven 't drove in … . thinking about the last time I drove made my ears ring and my head hurt . I stopped thinking about it . Maybe it was a neighbors car . They sometimes parked in front of our house if they were having a dinner party or were cleaning out the garage or something . I shook my head to clear it and went inside . The house was dark and quiet . I was about to head upstairs to my room when I heard the soft noise of someone clearing their throat . I turned to see to people in the dining room . Neither were my parents . Standing against a far wall was a man . He looked bored . He was dressed in dark jeans and a dark shirt and looked to be nearly my dads age . The woman on the other hand looked excited . She looked to be in her early twenties . She wore a bright yellow dress and her long blond hair down . I had no idea who this woman was , but hearing her address me and look me in the eyes made me feel good . Although her greeting also stirred a thought in me . Just a small thought in the corner of my mind that I didn 't want to let myself touch on . " Help me ? How ? Are you from social services ? " I was sure that Ava and David were who my dad said he was going to call last night . " No , I am not from social services . I am here to help in a different way . Will you please take a seat we need to talk . " Ava said . " Something , a thought , is gnawing at your mind . What is it ? " Ava asked . " It 's nothing . " I said wondering how she knew . I watched her pull out a pad of paper and a pen . She wrote something on the top sheet then put the pad face down so I could not read what she wrote . " Fine . " She said . " We 'll save it for later then . " She said patting the notepad like what was on my mind was written on its pages . " Now lets talk about how things are going for you . " " Really ? " She asked with a raised eyebrow . I felt like she could see right into my mind and could tell what I was thinking . " This will be easier and it will go a lot faster if you 're just honest with me . " Somehow I could feel that what she said was true . " No . Things are not so good . " I said and she nodded . " My mom is punishing me . She won 't talk to me or even look at me . She is even making my dad and brother punish me too . I just can 't take it . She even took my clothes out of my room , boxed them up , and hid them in the basement . " I spilled out everything I could think of . I looked away . The thought that was nagging at the corner of my mind sparked to life again when she said my name . I pushed the thought away though . Ava picked up the pen and paper again . After writing something down again she put it back . " I can 't . I need you to make this realization on your own . If I tell you it can be traumatizing to you . " She said . Ava opened a small box that I barely noticed . She pulled out a photograph and laid it on the table . It was a picture of my mom 's burnt hand . It was taken in her car , I could see the steering wheel , before she got it bandaged . Looking at it filled me with self loathing . I still felt so bad . I looked up and Ava . She looked back at me with kind but sad eyes . It was as if she could feel how bad I felt . Before I could say anything she laid down another picture . This one was of the dishes I washed . I looked up at Ava with a confused look . She smiled at me . The next picture was of the tub in the upstairs bathroom . It was full of soapy water . The book I was reading last week was laying by the tub . She smiled and laid down a picture of the mess I made in the kitchen last night . I actually smiled at this one . Ava even let out a little giggle as well . The last picture was of the upturned boxes if my clothes in the basement . My smile disappeared . A dark feeling surrounded me . " Um ? I burnt my mom , did some dishes , forgot to let the water out of the tub , made a mess of the kitchen and messed up some boxes . " I said pointing at each picture . She pulled out another picture and held it in front of her and looked at it for a long while . All I could see was the back . She sighed and laid it down . As she did so I looked away . I had no idea what the picture was , but I wasn 't ready to see it . After a few seconds I let my eyes slide across the picture . It was a car . I think it was my moms car . The one she got rid of about a month ago . Except , it was a heap of twisted metal and hardly distinguishable . I recognized the color and a sticker on one corner of the car . The sticker had the name and logo of the school basketball team my brother played on . In the center of the sticker was his jersey number . I knew this was my mothers car . My eyes were drawn to the lower right corner of the picture of the car . It was date and time stamped . The picture was taken a month ago . More specifically at 8 : 42 a . m . the day after my friend Samantha 's birthday . My head felt odd . I closed my eyes . A vision flashed in my mind . Sam and I were outside my house . We snuck out . I had my mom 's car keys . We were laughing together and going to the car . " No ! " I yelled in frustration . Then I remembered something Ava said earlier . ' I need to lead you to this realization . ' What was the realization ? " Why can 't I remember ? " I asked her . " I can 't tell you that . " She said . " But maybe this will help . " She flipped over the note pad . Two sentences were written on it . They were ' No one , other than Samantha at school today , has spoke to me or even really looked me in the eye in weeks . No one had said my name in weeks either . ' Both were the thoughts that were at the edge of my mind when I first met Ava . " I need you to look at everything I have placed for you on the table . Really look at each one . " She said in a serious tone , ignoring my question . I looked again at each item on the table in order . My head hurt the more I looked . It more than hurt it felt like it was buzzing . , like my whole skull was on vibrate . I also felt so drained . " We got in the car and I started it . Then we watched the window of my parents room for a light to turn on or one of their faces to appear to see if they had heard the car . After we were sure they slept threw us sneaking out we pulled out of the driveway and headed to the club . " I explained . " We talked and sang along to the radio . We had to go through a wooded area . The only lights were our head lights and the head lights of the cars . Sam said it was creepy out there in the woods . It kind of was . " My eyes were drawn to the picture of the car as I spoke . " It felt like we were in the stretch of woods forever . " I noticed in the picture that there was something red all over the inside of the car . Was it blood ? I closed my eyes really trying to think . A vision played out behind my eyes . Samantha and I were in in the car . Now and then we saw cars in the on coming lane . The lights were bugging my eyes . Sam said something about the woods that were flying past her window . I looked over to see what she was talking about but my eyes were hit by bright lights . It was like the dream I had last night . I looked back and the lights were coming into my lane . Sam noticed and screamed as I slammed on the breaks . The events seemed to be unfolding in slow motion . The lights were so bright that I could not make out the car they belonged to . I tried to swerve but I felt the impact before I could . The sound of crunching metal matched my screams . I felt my head bash off the window and my chest hit the steering wheel . Sam 's head went threw the windshield . Neither of us wore seat belts and the air bags never went off . Glass came at me in big shards . One shard drove itself into my face , another into my chest . Pain washed over me . I was having a hard time breathing and my vision was filling with dark blotches . I tried to look for Samantha but I couldn 't see her . Before I could find her I slipped into unconsciousness . " Yes . " Ava said nodding her head slowly . Tears were streaming down her face like she saw everything I saw in my vision . She wiped her tears away but more brimmed in her eyes . " Do you remember what happened next ? " She asked trying to choke back her sobs . " No . " I said . I felt completely drained . " Did we go to the hospital ? " I asked . The question felt odd to me as I said it . " No , you didn 't . I think your getting it , but you don 't want to let your mind go there . I have one last thing for you to look at . " She said . " Ready ? " Ava asked as she pulled out the last item . I nodded . She pulled out a laminated newspaper clipping . The clipping had the picture of my mom 's ruined car . The headline read : Fatal Crash Kills Two Local Teens . " Give me a minute David . " Ava said then turned to look at me . " Amanda " She said . " Think about it . Has your dad or brother ever shut you out before ? " " When was the last time someone spoke to you ? Or even looked at you before today . The clothes in the basement , remember those . Your mother told me she packed those up weeks ago . You 're dead . You just don 't want to believe it . At first you could fool your self . You expected to see your clothes hanging in the closet so you saw them there even though they were in the basement all this time . Your own mind knows that your dead . It has stopped creating illusions for you but you wont accept it . Hell , the only reason I am here talking to you today is because I can see ghosts . This is why I was called to help your family . " She explained . I looked down . I realized I could see the dining room table threw my hands and arms . It all crashed down on me . I am dead . Dead . " Oh , God . " I said . " Spilling the tea , cleaning the house , stomping on the stairs , running baths , making a mess and every other thing I have done … . " I let the sentence drop . " I have been tormenting my family all this time . " " You need to leave here . It is hard enough for your family to deal with their loss of you without them having to live with being haunted by you . I nodded . I felt like crying but I couldn 't . I looked out the window . Sam was waiting for me . I knew it was time to go . I had no idea what awaited me but it had to be better then being ignored or tormenting my family . I walked to meet Sam . Not bothering with opening doors or avoiding obstacles . Sam reached out and took my hand and looked me in the eyes . She didn 't look like the sickly pale version of herself that spoke to me at school . She looked just like her old self . I searched her eyes for any sign of anger , bitterness or blame for the accident that took both of our lives and found none . " Its about time . " Sam said to me with a smile . She tugged on my arm . When I didn 't budge she looked back at me and read my face . " I don 't blame you Amanda . It wasn 't your fault . " She said . I nodded and looked down and realized that the porch of my house was gone and replaced with lush grass . I took a look around and we were in a beautiful meadow .