" Alex " has never been published , and I understand why . Saying that the story is in questionable taste would be like saying that meeting an Internet - only acquaintance in a dark alley shows questionable judgment . But I hope some people who have loved old dogs despite their faults might enjoy the story anyway . When our dog , Alex , died , I wanted to write a tribute to him , to enshrine some memories for our family . A straight memoir didn 't feel right , so I played around with the idea of giving Alex a starring role in a mystery story . Could I find a way to transform his bad habits and sweet personality into the stuff of heroism ? Could I work our cats into the story , too ? I don 't think I 've ever enjoyed writing a story more . I showed the story to my husband and daughters and , at their urging , submitted it to just one magazine . When the gently - worded rejection came , I wasn 't surprised , and I didn 't try again . If ever a story has screamed " self - publish , " this is the one . " If I start a website some day , " I thought , " I 'll post the story there , and that will be Alex 's tribute . " Alex was an old dog , and he knew he was loved . He did what he damn well pleased . From time to time , he still enjoyed the ritual of relieving himself outside - the stroll into the sweet - smelling back yard , the leisurely exploration of bushes and flower beds , the pats and praises when he came back into the warm kitchen . On the whole , though , these days , he preferred the basement . He was more his own man when he just ambled down the stairs whenever the impulse took him , sniffed about a bit , and picked his spot . His people didn 't like it , he knew . When the woman discovered something and cried out in dismay , when the girl crinkled up her nose , when the man wearily gathered the paper towels and spray cleaner and plastic grocery bags and headed down the stairs , Alex knew he 'd disappointed them , and he felt sorry . But they never did anything much about it . Oh , the woman might scold , and the girl might gaze sorrowfully into his eyes when she hugged him , and the man might curse a bit . None of that was especially pleasant . But they still gave him his breakfast and his dinner right on schedule , they still called out to him joyfully whenever they came back to the house , they still took him out for his walks , they still let him sleep on their beds , they still petted him , they still plied him with the treats other dogs got only when they did tricks . Alex had never done tricks . He 'd never had to . Lately , he 'd rediscovered the pleasures of overturning wastebaskets , of chomping on cellophane and rolling soft - drink cans about and chewing up Kleenex and scattering moist bits on the carpet . When he 'd been a puppy , they 'd sometimes slapped him lightly on the rump when he 'd done that . Now , they just sighed , and cleaned up the mess , and gave him his dinner . They indulged him . He 'd be a fool not to take advantage of the situation , and Alex was no fool . It wasn 't that he didn 't still enjoy pleasing them . He did . He just no longer viewed it as a necessity . He was , after all , a realist . Then they brought the kitten home . There had been a cat in the house when Alex had first come here , a fat , slow , cranky gray thing that had hissed at him for a few days before deciding , grudgingly , to tolerate his presence . Once he 'd gotten used to her , Alex had liked the cat , mostly because she never finished a meal . She always left a little something in her dish for him . It didn 't take him long to learn the routine - bolt down his own food and then wait patiently , standing three feet back from her dish , until she 'd picked and licked and nibbled as much as she wanted . He mustn 't crowd her , he learned , and he mustn 't bark . Barking didn 't make her hurry ; it just made her mad . Eventually , she 'd finish , and stroll off for a wash and a nap . At first , the people tried to keep him from finishing the cat 's food , but they 'd come to their senses fairly quickly , and his right to seconds was established . In time , he and the cat had become friends . She allowed him the second - sunniest spot on the living room carpet during nap times and didn 't mind if he sometimes curled up right next to her , warming his fur against hers . Then the cat had gone away . He hadn 't noticed , at first , when she got slower and thinner ; he just felt glad to see that she kept leaving larger portions for him in her bowl . But he noticed when the man had to start lifting her up onto the sofa , and when the woman and the girl started spending a lot of time sitting there with her , bringing her food to her , urging her to eat , even dipping their fingertips into ice cream and begging her to lick it off . Alex would have been glad to take care of the ice cream himself , but they 'd shooed him away and petted the cat and sometimes cried a bit . All this had gone on for some time . And then , one day , the cat was gone . Alex had tried to find her , had wandered from room to room looking for her ; whenever the woman and the girl had noticed him doing that , they 'd cried again . In time , he 'd gotten used to taking his naps alone , and things had settled down , and he 'd almost forgotten her . Now , the kitten had moved in , and the memories came back . The kitten was gray , too , but it was little and quick and nasty . It was never afraid of him , not for one second , not even on the first day when they brought it home in the green plastic case and it sprang right out , arching its back and flaunting its tail and snarling . When he 'd walked over to check it out , it had flexed its tiny claws and swiped his nose , then paid no further attention to him and pranced off to take possession of the house . It had absolutely no respect for his seniority and never left him a single bite of anything in its food dish . For a while , Alex had hoped his people would come to appreciate its shortcomings and send it away ; but they seemed , unaccountably , to like it . They gave it toys and cuddled it and laughed foolishly when it leapt at bits of dangled yarn or did other inconsequential things . At least the kitten was no threat to him : Obviously , his people still preferred him , since they never took the kitten on walks . And , all things considered , it felt good to once again have someone else in the house with him when his people left for the day . Not that the kitten was especially interesting company . Once or twice a day , it would race about the house crazily for no particular reason , and Alex enjoyed watching that . For the most part , though , the kitten just sat on the back of the sagging yellow couch in the family room , watching the back yard . Alex couldn 't see much sense to that . It wasted valuable nap time , and there was never anything much to see - just the occasional bird or bunny or squirrel , or the silly woman from the house to the left sunning herself on her deck for hour after hour , and the silly teenaged boy from the house to the right doggedly shooting a big orange ball at the hoop attached to his garage , missing more often than not . Sometimes the woman 's husband would come out to sit with her for a while , and sometimes they 'd argue - that could be mildly entertaining ; sometimes the boy 's mother would walk out , offer the boy lemonade or cookies , try to start a conversation , and walk away dejected - that was unfailingly boring . On the whole , Alex preferred to ignore the kitten and nap on the second - sunniest spot on the living room carpet , dreaming about the good old days with the fat old cat . The day he 'd remember for a long time started in the usual way . He was sleeping in the room the man and the woman shared - the kitten slept in the room with the girl - when the shrill thing next to the bed made its noise . Then there was bustling , and breakfast , and a trip to the back yard , and doors opening and closing and pats and hugs and goodbyes , and then he and the kitten had the house to themselves and settled into their routines - one to nap , one to watch the yard . Mid - morning , they both roused themselves to greet the mailman - Alex and the kitten agreed about the necessity of that . At noon , the woman came home , as she always did , to take Alex for a quick trot around the block ; Alex cast a smug glance at the kitten as he and the woman set out on their round . And he took the woman 's urgings seriously , and gave due consideration to each tree and bush , and accorded her some reward for her attentions . On this day , though , as on most days , he just wasn 't yet in the mood for a full effort . The woman went back to work , and Alex settled down to his afternoon nap ; an hour or so later , when the mood felt right , he sauntered down to the basement , then came upstairs to nap some more . By rights , the next thing to disturb his rest should have been the girl 's return . But on this particular day , something else happened . Right in the middle of a cozy dream about finishing off the fat cat 's dinner , there was a noise at the back door . The girl 's home already , Alex thought , and shook himself awake , and raced dutifully to the family room to greet her . But it wasn 't the girl . It was two guests . This was unexpected . Usually , guests came in the evening ; always , they came when someone in the family was home . Alex couldn 't remember the last time guests had arrived in the middle of the afternoon when everyone in the family was gone . And it was odd that both of these guests were wearing gloves on such a hot summer day . Even so , Alex knew how to behave when guests arrived - he knew what they expected . He took two steps back , lowered his hindquarters , and barked as loudly and fiercely as he could . " Not this dog , " the second guest said , and squatted down to Alex 's level . " This dog 's a pussycat . Aren 't you , Alex ? Aren 't you , boy ? Quiet , now . See what I brought you ? Looks good , doesn 't it , boy ? " Now , this was an innovation . Usually , when Alex barked to greet guests , someone in the family gave him a treat to ask him to be quiet . This time , the guests had brought their own treat - unconventional , but a treat is a treat . Alex could adjust . You can 't teach an old dog new tricks be damned , he thought , and stopped barking , and accepted the treat , and let the second guest pet him . It was a very good treat - half a hot dog , not just one of those dry , bland biscuity blocks - and Alex congratulated himself on being flexible enough to accommodate a departure from tradition . The kitten , who always took a while to decide whether or not to bother greeting anyone , hung back a bit , looking the guests over and hissing softly . " Must be , " the second guest said , standing up . " Part beagle , obviously - that 's where he gets that solid body . And with those long , thin legs , the rest might be Shetland sheepdog . Anyway , his coloring 's good - nice contrast between the black body and the white on the face and the chest and the tip of the tail . " " And the paws , " the first guest pointed out . " And with a little brown mixed in - he 's sorta cute . Anyhow , good work on getting him to shut up . And good work on getting us in here . How did you know about the key in the fake rock ? " " Not you , obviously , since you never think of anything . Well , if anyone comes home early now , it 's just going to have to look like we 've got a serial burglar in the neighborhood . " The second guest reached into a pocket , and took out a heavy metal thing , and tossed it significantly from hand to hand . " A serial burglar - killer . No way are we leaving any witnesses behind . " " Hey , don 't talk like that , " the first guest said . " It 's not going to happen . We just have to find a place to stash this stuff and clear out . What do you think ? Basement ? " " Probably , " the second guest said , and smiled slightly as the kitten strolled over for a sniff . " Well , look who 's decided to say hello . Now , that 's a pretty kitten . " " It sure is , " the first guest said , and grinned , and squatted down , and held out a hand to the kitten . " Hey , pretty kitten - wanna say hi ? I bet you like having your neck skritched , don 't you ? Here , pretty kitten - let me skritch your neck . " Not , Alex judged , an intelligent guest - it grabbed the kitten by the neck , and picked it up , and tried to cuddle it . Even a guest should know better than that . Kittens don 't like to be grabbed - dogs generally learn to tolerate such things , but kittens generally don 't . Certainly not this kitten . When the guest grabbed it , it snarled , and twisted its body about , and sank its claws into the guest 's arm , and leapt free . Since that first day when it had swiped at Alex 's nose , the kitten 's claws had grown considerably - no one in the family had yet worked up the courage to try to trim them - so the scratches left in the guest 's arm were long and bloody . " Damn ! " the first guest cried . " Look at what that stupid cat did to me ! I 'm bleeding like crazy ! I better get a bandaid or something . " " You baby , " the second guest said . " Here - take these paper towels and press down hard ; that 'll stop the bleeding . And then let 's get going . No more playing around with pets . " Grumbling , still swearing under its breath , the first guest pressed the paper towels against the wound for a few moments , then tossed them into the family room wastebasket . When the two guests headed down the stairs to the basement , Alex trotted after them . The kitten might not know how to be hospitable , but Alex understood how much guests enjoyed his company , and he wasn 't about to desert these two , even though one of them did curse too much to be entirely pleasant . The kitten came along , too - keeping a careful distance from the guests , the fur on the back of its neck still bristling with caution , its eyes still narrow with curiosity and distrust . Most guests who came down to the basement preferred the big room right at the bottom of the stairs - the carpeted room with the wood on the walls and the big green table in the middle . Guests liked to stand around the table , knocking balls against each other with long sticks , and that was always fun to watch and to listen to ; the balls were hard and made loud , crisp noises when they bumped into each other . But these guests walked right through the carpeted room and into the part of the basement that had a concrete floor . They passed the washer and the drier and the man 's work bench and stood looking at some large metal shelves stacked high with cardboard boxes . " One that won 't be opened for a while , " the second guest said , and pointed . " There - on the top shelf , the one marked ' Halloween Decorations . ' That gives us until October ; that should be plenty of time . Get it down . " The first guest obeyed with some difficulty . " So , the idea is that we just hide the stuff in the box until things cool down , then come back and get it and pawn it . Right ? " " Right , " the second guest said . " That 's our first line of defense - that 's assuming the police figure it was just a random burglary gone wrong . They 'll hassle some usual suspects for a while , give up , call the case unsolved , and forget about it . " " Or maybe we 'll get lucky , " the first guest said , " and they 'll arrest some poor schnook and send him to prison . That would really close the case . Either way , we come back and get the stuff . That sounds pretty good . And our second line of defense ? " " That 's what happens if the police figure there was a personal motive and the burglary was a cover - up . If they start thinking that , they might decide to search neighbors ' houses for evidence - and they might just start with this house , since everyone knows these guys couldn 't stand the old man . If that happens , the cops find the stuff here , they arrest the husband or the wife or both , and that closes the case . " " Hey - what was I supposed to do when the old man walked in on me like that ? Tell him to have a nice day and just stroll on out ? And you 're the one who told me that he never comes home during the day , that I shouldn 't have any problems . Anyhow , will the stuff in the box really be enough to close the case ? What if the husband and the wife both have ironclad alibis ? " " There 's no such thing as an ironclad alibi , " the second guest said confidently . " The cops can break any alibi down , whether it 's legit or not . And the husband 's in real estate , so he must be in and out of the office all the time ; and the wife comes home every day to walk the dog - she could 've done it then . Here - put all the stuff at the bottom of the box , and put the cardboard skeletons on top of it . Good - the plastic pumpkins , too . Now , put the box back on the top shelf . No , more to the left - right where it was before . " " I don 't think so - I think it was more to the left , " the second guest said , and took a step back to get a broader perspective . And then the second guest grimaced . " Oh , damn - what did I just step in ? " The first guest looked , and sniffed , and giggled . " In something our friend Alex left behind , I bet . Oh , man - what a mess ! " " Alex ! " the girl called out happily . " I 'm home early , boy - Shannon 's mom gave me a ride . Where are you , boy ? " The two guests looked at each other sharply . " Get the box down again , " the second guest said in a harsh whisper . " We may need the gun . " Something wasn 't right . The guests should be going upstairs to greet the girl , or calling out to her to ask her to come downstairs and knock balls around with long sticks . Instead , they were both being very quiet , and the first guest was silently taking the box down again , and reaching beneath the plastic pumpkins and the cardboard skeletons , and gripping a squat metal thing . " Alex ! " the girl cried out again . " Where are you ? Oh , no - you 're not down the basement , are you ? You 're not doing something bad ? " She 's going to come downstairs to look for me , Alex thought ; and suddenly he felt very sure that the girl should not come downstairs . It wasn 't safe . Something was wrong about these guests . With one last look back , he bounded up the stairs as quickly as his old legs would allow , barking loudly , to tell her about it . " There you are , " the girl said , crouching down to give Alex a hug . Her arms around his neck felt firm and comforting , and he licked her cheek affectionately . Then she stood up and took a step back from him . " What were you doing in the basement , you naughty boy ? If I went downstairs to check , would I find something nasty ? " Yes , she would - she 'd find something very nasty . But at least Alex didn 't have to worry that she 'd really go downstairs to check ; she never did , even though she always got home first and knew his habits well . She always waited until her father came home and went downstairs to check , so that he 'd be the one to find the nasty things and have to clean them up . Sure enough , the girl gave him one more reproving glance , shook her head , and opened the refrigerator door . This was good . Now she 'd get herself a snack , and maybe she 'd slip him a piece of cheese . She often did , even though her mother had told her that she really shouldn 't , that it wasn 't really good for Alex 's digestion . The guests almost forgotten , Alex sat on his haunches and waited expectantly , slapping his tail against the floor to signal his willingness to join her in a snack . But then there was a noise from the basement , a soft thud of something falling on the floor . Those clumsy guests , Alex thought - they must have knocked something over , or dropped the box when they tried to put it back up on the shelf again . The girl looked up slowly , turning her face toward the door to the basement . " What was that ? " she said , and looked around the kitchen . " Where 's the kitten ? Was the kitten downstairs with you , Alex ? Did that silly kitty knock something over and make a mess ? " She closed the refrigerator door and took a step toward the basement . No good , Alex knew - she shouldn 't go down there . He barked sharply to let her know . She glanced at him , puzzled , then looked away and took another step toward the basement . Barking wasn 't enough - she didn 't understand him , no matter how clearly he tried to explain the situation . Desperate , he tried to think of something else to do . He barked again , got her to glance at him again . And then he lifted his right rear leg . That got her attention . " Oh , no , you don 't , " she said . " Not right in the middle of the kitchen floor ! Then I 'd have to clean it up . Oh , Alex - you silly , naughty old thing . Do you need to go out , boy ? All right , fine . Come on . " At least he 'd distracted her for the moment . Relieved , he followed her to the family room . But when she opened the back door and motioned for him to go out into the yard , he hesitated . That wouldn 't be good enough - that might be very bad . She might let him out and then go down to the basement to check on the kitten , and he wouldn 't even be there to protect her . No , he had to get her to leave the house with him ; then , maybe the guests would go away . They 'd come when none of the people were at home ; maybe they 'd go away again if none of the people were at home . Working out the logic of all this was fairly exhausting for Alex , but he felt sure he was right . So instead of going out into the yard , he sat down , gazed longingly at the leash hanging on a hook next to the door , and whimpered . " What 's wrong ? " the girl asked , and followed his gaze . " The leash ? You want to go for a walk ? No , not yet , boy - Dad will take you for a walk when he gets home . He always does . Just go out in the yard and take care of your business , and then I 'll give you a treat . Okay , boy ? As soon as you come in . A treat ! C ' mon , boy ! Two treats ! " No one in this family could withstand his whimpers for long . The girl kept urging him for another half minute , then gave up , grabbed the leash , and sighed . " Okay , fine . You want a walk , you 'll get a walk . A short walk . You spoiled , naughty old dog , you . " He set a brisk pace , pulling the girl along insistently until they turned the corner , not letting himself pause to sniff at any of the bushes or trees so fragrant that they were usually irresistible . And then he slowed and sniffed at everything , even at hydrants that were usually beneath his notice . He wasn 't sure just why , but he wanted this walk to last a long time . The girl got impatient and begged him to hurry up ; he pretended not to hear . He dragged the walk out for a full fifteen minutes , then reluctantly let her tug him home . When they came into the family room , the kitten was there , sitting on the back of the sagging yellow couch , watching the back yard , silent and mysterious . A good sign , Alex thought - maybe things were back to normal . As soon as the girl unhooked his leash , he raced down the basement stairs to check . " No , Alex ! " the girl cried . " Not the basement ! Good grief ! After I took you for a walk and everything ! Can 't you be good for just a few minutes , until Dad gets home ? " He checked the carpeted room with the big green table , the laundry room , the work room , the room with the metal shelves . No - no guests , and the cardboard box was back on the top shelf . Everything looked just the way it had before . It was all over . Relieved , he went back up to the kitchen , patiently endured the girl 's scolding , whimpered until she gave him a piece of cheese , and went to the living room to nap . The second - sunniest spot on the carpet was barely warm this late in the afternoon , but he settled down there anyhow , happy to have his routine restored . " What a day ! " the man said , hugging first Alex , then his wife , then his daughter . " I signed up two new listings , and I showed the house on Hastings , the house on Buckingham , the house on Lancaster - I had an appointment to show the house on York , too , but the people never showed . I don 't think I was ever at my desk for more than five minutes . How were your days ? " " Really hard , " the girl said , putting down the carrot she 'd been paring half - heartedly . " The kids at camp kept me running the whole time , and it was so hot . And then Shannon 's mom gave me a ride home , but the minute I got here , Alex started whining to go on a walk . I took him around the block . " " You did ? " the man said , surprised . " That was nice of you , honey . " He looked hopefully toward the basement door . " If he was so eager to go out , maybe he 'd been good since noon . Maybe he didn 't make a mess today . I should really go check - " " Why don 't you give yourself a break for once ? " the woman said . " You can check after dinner . Just relax for now - you had a rough day . You want some wine ? " " It 's an ambulance , " the man said , pushing the curtain aside and looking out the window . " Right across the street , in front of the old man 's house . I hope he 's all right . " Renewed siren sounds cut her off . By now , the whole family had gathered in the living room , including the kitten ; the man pushed the curtain aside again to take another look . " A cop car , too , " he reported . " No - two cop cars . I wonder what 's going on . " " Certainly not , " the woman said . " Whatever the problem is , the paramedics and the police can do their jobs more efficiently without a lot of people gawking at them . We should go back in the kitchen and finish making the salad . " " But everyone else is going out to look , " the girl pleaded . " See ? There 's that tall kid from next door and his mom , and the teacher and her husband , and a whole bunch of other people . Please , Mom ? This is exciting - it 's the first time anything has ever happened on this street . And maybe we could help . " " How could we possibly help ? " the man said - but it was clear from his voice that he was tempted , too . " Still , it doesn 't seem right to just sit down and eat dinner as if nothing were happening . That would seem sort of - uncaring . Hard - hearted . " " Well , " the woman said reluctantly , " I guess we could take Alex for a walk . You 'd do that after dinner anyway . I guess we could take him around the block , and when we get back , we can go across the street and ask the neighbors what 's going on . " It didn 't take them long to round the block and join the knot of neighbors standing on the sidewalk in front of the old man 's house . Alex felt himself quivering with curiosity and a vague feeling of foreboding , especially when he began to think that two of these neighbors were the guests who had come to the house this afternoon . He couldn 't be sure - they looked different out here than they had in the house ; if he could get close enough to smell them , he 'd know . But for some reason he didn 't want to get closer . It was the husband of the woman from the house on the left - the woman who lay in her yard sunning herself all the time , the woman the girl had referred to as the teacher . " Something happened to the old man , I guess , " the teacher 's husband said . " Somebody said that he decided to go home for lunch today , and then he never came back to work . So after work his secretary stopped by his house to check on him - and then I guess something didn 't look right , so she called an ambulance and the cops . There are some detectives here , too - plain - clothes guys . They came out a few minutes ago and asked us all a bunch of questions , but they wouldn 't tell us anything . " " Oh , my God , " the girl said . " The sheet 's pulled up over his face . Does that mean he 's , like , dead ? " " Sad news , folks , " the gaunt one said . " Your neighbor 's deceased - shot twice in the chest , actually , and it looks like his house was burglarized . So we 're going to be looking into this , obviously , and we might as well get started right now , see if you folks can give us any information . Deceased lived alone , right ? Widowed ? " " That 's right , " the tall boy 's mother said . " His wife died - oh , it must be nearly ten years ago now . Cancer . They didn 't have any children . " " That 's right , " the teacher said , flipping her long blonde hair back off her shoulder . " It was supposed to be the best in the state . There was an article about it in the newspaper several months ago . " " Yeah , I remember reading that , " the gaunt man said . " Well , the collection 's gone , and probably some other stuff , too - somebody went through deceased 's bureau and desk drawers pretty good . Now , I don 't suppose anybody noticed anything odd in the neighborhood lately ? A stranger hanging around , a car you didn 't recognize , things like that ? " He waited for all the neighbors to shake their heads and make negative murmurs , then sighed . " Okay . Well , we 'll get back to at least some of you later . My partner 's going to get your names and addresses and phone numbers , and then why don 't you just go on home , let us finish up here ? " " I recognize that name , " he said . " When we were talking to folks earlier , one of your neighbors said you had a big fight with deceased about a year ago . Is that right ? " The man hesitated . " We had a disagreement . I wouldn 't call it a ' big fight . ' There was certainly nothing physical . We - well , we exchanged some angry words . " This time , the man flushed . " I wouldn 't call it breaking the law . I apparently violated a city ordinance . You see , our cat died , and we buried her in our back yard . I never knew there was anything wrong with that . " " You bet there is , " the gaunt man said , nodding somberly . " It 's a health code violation . No domestic animals to be interred on residential property , only in properly licensed commercial animal interment areas . " " Well , we didn 't know that , " the woman said , tightening her hold on Alex 's leash . " When our poor cat passed away , it seemed the most natural thing in the world to bury her in our back yard . My husband built a coffin for her , and my daughter and I sewed a little pillow and a little cover , and we had a service - we read some psalms and sang a hymn , and we made a little headstone , and our daughter put flowers on the grave every day . It was all very sweet , very nice . But I guess somebody noticed it and didn 't like it , and told the old man about it . I don 't think he noticed it on his own , not from across the street . " She cast one resentful glance at the boy and mother who lived in the house to the right , another resentful glance at the teacher and husband who lived in the house to the left . By now , the other neighbors had gone back to their houses . " The disagreement , " the man said . " He came over one night and told me I had to dig the cat up , and I said I wouldn 't , and we - well , we disagreed . And then the next day two cops - two police officers showed up at our door with a complaint , saying we had to find another way to dispose of the cat within twenty - four hours . So we had to dig our cat up and have her cremated . It was very upsetting for all of us , and especially for our daughter - she cried every night for a week . " The man shrugged . " No . What point would there be in that ? We just never spoke to him again . We 'd never been really friendly anyway - he wasn 't a very nice old man . Look , why are you asking about this ? What has it got to do with anything ? " " Probably nothing , " the gaunt man said . " It 's just that some of the evidence makes us think maybe this wasn 't a random burglary , maybe it was done by someone who knew deceased 's habits - someone who had a grudge against him , maybe , and got into a big fight with him today , and did something unfortunate , and stole a few things to cover up . And when I spoke to your neighbors and asked if deceased had any enemies , your names were the only ones that came up . " " This is ridiculous , " the woman said , tightening her hold on Alex 's leash again ; he gagged once , politely , to tell her to loosen up . " Are you implying that just because he had a little disagreement with the old man a year ago , my husband - I can 't even say it . It 's too crazy . " " I didn 't necessarily say it was your husband , " the gaunt man said . " The way I hear it , you got in on the shouting match with deceased last year , too . And I also hear you come home at noon every day to walk the dog . Is that true ? " " Yes , with all our friendly neighbors , " the woman said furiously . " It 's nice to know we live on such a civic - minded street , where everybody is just so eager to gossip with the police . I don 't suppose that anyone shared any information about anyone else . I don 't suppose anyone told you that I wasn 't the only person home at noon today . " " That 's right , " the girl said , and pointed at the teacher . " She teaches at the high school , but now that it 's summer vacation , she 's home pretty much all the time . And him . " She pointed at the tall boy . " He didn 't get a job this summer , so he 's probably home pretty much all the time , too . Either one of them could have done it . " " Calm down , sweetie , " her father said , patting her arm . " We don 't need to start tossing accusations around . Look , I think we should all calm down . Officer , if you have more questions , we 'd be glad to answer them . If you want to come over to our house to talk , fine . We 've got nothing to hide . We can give you some coffee . " " Coffee sounds good , actually , " the gaunt man said . " This call came in just as I was starting dinner - I never got a chance to eat . And sometimes in cases like this , when we just sit around and chat with the neighbors , real casual - like , little bits of information come out , and they end up being helpful . " He looked at the tall boy and his mother , at the teacher and her husband . " You mind if your neighbors come over for coffee , too ? You never know who 's going to turn out to have helpful little bits of information . " Alex felt glad to get home . He hadn 't been able to follow much of the conversation , but he knew his people were upset , so he felt upset , too . And by now he 'd gotten several good sniffs in on the sly , and he was positive that two of the neighbors settling down for coffee in the living room were the two guests who had stopped by this afternoon . He wished he could tell his people that - he felt , somehow , that it might be important - but his people often had trouble understanding him when he had important things to say , and tonight they were hardly paying any attention to him at all . The kitten was , of course , no help whatsoever . For some reason , it had taken a liking to the stocky young policeman in the suit - the kitten frequently had unaccountable tastes - and was rubbing up against his pants leg and letting him skritch its neck and purring , seemingly oblivious to the seriousness of the situation . His stress level mounting , Alex found a hunk of twisted , multi - colored rope that his people had given him for his birthday , carried it to a quiet corner of the living room , and began to gnaw . That helped , but not enough . " Well , this is nice , " the gaunt man was saying , stirring his coffee for no particular reason - he hadn 't added either sugar or milk to it , though the woman had set containers of both down on the coffee table . " This is real friendly . Now , you said you got nothing to hide , and that 's great . Frankly , considering all that we 've heard so far about the big fight you had with deceased , we could get a search warrant in an hour or so , no problem . But since you got nothing to hide , maybe you wouldn 't mind if my partner has a look around your house while we chat , even before we get the warrant , just to rule out certain unpleasant possibilities . Don 't worry - he 'll be real neat , put everything right back where he found it . All right with you ? " Without a word , the stocky young man headed for the kitchen , and the kitten ambled after him fondly . Great , Alex thought . That silly kitten will probably lead him right down to the basement and point him straight toward the box on the top metal shelf . Without knowing exactly why , Alex felt that it would not be a good thing if the stocky young man looked too closely at the box on the top metal shelf . " Well , let 's see where we are , " the gaunt man said , and took a large sip of coffee . " As I understand it , most of you were at work all day - even this lovely young lady , who 's got a summer job at a day camp , right ? But some of you were at home . " " I was , " the teacher said , flipping her long blonde hair back on her shoulder again . " It 's summer break . But I didn 't see anything . I got up to fix breakfast for my husband , and then I took a shower , and then I spent most of the day in our back yard - reading , and working on my tan . I 'm working on a nice , deep tan this summer . See ? " She smiled , and tilted her head to the side , and pushed down the slender strap on her sundress , revealing a stark contrast between dark and pale . " Hey , no need to start undressing in front of everybody , " her husband said , his voice suddenly sharp . " Just keep your clothes on for once , will you ? Officer , when my wife says she didn 't see nothing , you can believe her . She never sees nothing - just sits around all day wrapped up in her own little world , feeling sorry for herself because she isn 't dancing on the Rivera or romping on a beach in Cancun or something , reading big , goopy romance novels because she hasn 't got anything better to do with her time . " " Well , if you ever took me anywhere , I would have something better to do with my time , " the teacher said , her eyes flaring . " But no . You 're so cheap you never take me anywhere , and you use up all your vacation days going fishing with your idiot brother , so I 've got to waste my whole summer break just sitting around the house . " " Thanks , folks , " the gaunt man cut in quickly . " Very helpful information . And you , young man - you were home today , too ? You don 't have a summer job ? " The tall boy blushed and looked down at the floor , and his mother reached out to take his hand . " He won 't be eighteen for almost another three months , " she said , " and he 's very sensitive , very delicate . He was deeply traumatized when his father walked out on us six years ago , and he had a very challenging junior year . He had one sympathetic teacher , thank goodness . " And here she paused , and shot an appreciative glance at the teacher . " But most of his teachers were much too hard on him . He told me that he just didn 't feel up to looking for a job for this summer , and I agreed that it wouldn 't be wise to push things too much . " The tall boy gulped , both his hands anxiously kneading the long sleeves on his turtle - neck sweater . " No . I mean , I slept in some , and then I watched Saw IV a couple of times on DVD , and then I went out back and shot some hoops , and then I played some games on the web , and then I texted some friends . It was a pretty full day . I didn 't really have time to see anything . " Of course the stocky young man had found some stuff in the basement . The kitten had probably led him straight to it . Alex felt his distress deepen , and the twisted - rope thing just wasn 't doing it . He needed something more comforting to chew . Not knowing what else to do , he started to follow the gaunt man and the stocky young man toward the basement ; and then , as he passed the family room , he paused . The family room . That was a nice , private spot , and it had a wastebasket full of fresh things to chew . That might give him some real relief . Maybe he should spend a few minutes checking out the family room wastebasket , and let the gaunt man and the stocky man check out the basement on their own . He tipped the wastebasket over carefully - it was plastic , so tipping it over was a reasonably quiet process - pushed aside a dirty paper - towel wad that didn 't smell quite right , found an appealingly crinkly piece of cellophane , and set to work . Moments later , the gaunt man and the stocky young man came back up the basement stairs , holding things in their hands , looking grim , followed by the absurdly affectionate kitten . Alex chewed faster as they walked past him toward the living room . The house was so quiet that he didn 't have any trouble hearing the voices drift in from the other room . " My partner found some interesting things in the basement , folks , " the gaunt man was saying . " In a box of Halloween decorations . Maybe three hundred baseball cards in little plastic holders , a couple of hundred dollars in cash , some watches and rings - and a gun . Any idea how those things got in the box ? " " My God . " It was the man 's voice . " No . I don 't know anything about those things . I never put them in any box - I never touched them . Neither did my wife . You 've got to believe us , Officer . Neither one of us even saw those things before - right , honey ? " Alex heard the gaunt man sigh . " All right . Well , I guess this isn 't just a friendly conversation any more . Sergeant , you 'd better read these folks their rights . " " Wait ! " It was the girl 's voice this time . " Maybe - maybe someone planted that stuff in the basement , to make it look like we did it . I got home earlier than usual this afternoon - remember , Mom and Dad ? I told you Shannon 's mom gave me a ride . And when I got home , Alex was acting all weird . I mean , at first he was down the basement , and I had to call him twice to get him to come upstairs - " " Well , no , " the girl said . " I mean , I was planning to , but while I was still saying hello to him , there was this noise downstairs , and I thought the kitten had knocked something over , and I was going to go downstairs to check it out . That 's when Alex started acting really weird . He started barking , and he lifted up his leg , like he was going to pee right on the kitchen floor . And when I tried to get him to go out into the back yard , he wouldn 't budge . He just sat down by the door , and stared at his leash , and whimpered like crazy until I finally gave in and took him for a walk . Remember how I said he made me take him for a walk ? He never does that . " " Good grief ! " It was the woman 's voice this time . " He didn 't want you to go downstairs , and he didn 't want to leave you alone in the house . The murderer must have still been in the basement . And Alex wanted to get you out of the house , to give the murderer a chance to get away without hurting you . Oh , my God ! He may have saved your life ! " " Nice theory , folks , " the gaunt man said . " But it 's all just your say - so . And why didn 't you tell me about any of this before , young lady ? And when you got back from taking the dog for a walk , did you go downstairs to check out the noise ? " " No , " the girl said . " I mean , I 'd sort of forgotten about it by then , and the kitten was upstairs - so I figured that if the kitten had knocked something over , my father could clean it up when he went down to clean up Alex 's mess . And I didn 't tell you about it before because I didn 't think it was important , but it is important . Don 't you see ? " " The dog does make messes in the basement , Lieutenant , " the stocky young man said . " I nearly stepped in one when I was taking the box off the shelf . It looked like somebody had already stepped in it , in fact . " " That proves exactly nothing , " the gaunt man said . " And just how did this murderer supposedly get into your house to plant all this stuff ? I haven 't noticed any signs of breaking and entering here - have you , Sergeant ? " " No one would have to break anything to enter our house , " the woman said . " We keep a spare key outside - in an artificial rock in the back yard , right next to the birdfeeder . You see , our daughter gets home from work before we do , and she sometimes forgets her key , so we keep it there for her just in case . " The woman hesitated , then rushed ahead . " Someone might have seen our daughter use it . Someone who lives near here , maybe , and spends a lot of time spying on us and noticing things and gossiping about them . " " Hey , what the hell is that supposed to mean ? " the teacher 's husband said angrily . " Are you implying that one of us might have had something to do with this ? " " That 's disgusting , " the tall boy 's mother said . " You 're in trouble , so you try to get out of it by casting suspicion on your neighbors . You should be ashamed of yourself . " " Simmer down , folks , " the gaunt man said . " Even if there 's a spare key outside , that doesn 't prove anybody used it today . Still , I guess we might as well check out all the details while we 're here . Sergeant ? You want to go out back , see if there 's a fake rock next to the birdfeeder ? " It seemed like only a second later that the stocky young man walked into the family room , passed Alex without a glance , and went out the back door . Things were getting worse - Alex could feel it . And the cellophane had by now lost its comforting crinkle - he needed something more soothing to chew . Well , he could try the paper - towel wad . Even with a not - quite - right smell , paper - towel wads were always highly chewable . Alex had just gotten started when the stocky young man came back into the family room , cast a friendly glance his way , and paused . " A knocked - over wastebasket , " the stocky young man said . " Maybe that 's a sign that somebody did enter the house - or did you knock that over , boy ? " He crouched down to pat Alex 's head , took a closer look at him , and frowned . " What 've you got there , boy ? What are you chewing on ? C ' mon - let me have it . " Alex had perhaps the mildest temper of any dog on the planet ; he could bear almost any slight or indignity with patience and good humor . But he did not like it when people tried to take away things he 'd started to chew . When the stocky young man tugged at the paper - towel wad , Alex growled - first just reprovingly , then with a note of real warning - and chomped down harder . But the stocky young man persisted , and stroked Alex 's head , and murmured to him in a polite , encouraging tone . Fine , then , Alex thought . If he wants it so much , let him have it . Maybe then he 'll be nicer to my people . And maybe , when he 's finished with it , he 'll give it back to me . He loosened his lock on the paper - towel wad , the stocky young man drew it away , and Alex followed him back to the living room . The girl was crying now ; the woman was sitting next to her on the sofa , obviously trying to comfort her but , just as obviously , not succeeding very well . Of course not . When people in this family needed comforting , Alex was the man for the job . He went over to the girl and put his front paws up on the sofa , thumping his tail on the floor sympathetically . Sure enough , the girl leaned forward out of her mother 's embrace and put her arms around Alex 's neck . " I found the fake rock and the key out back , Lieutenant , " the stocky young man said . " I also found this in the family room - the dog was chewing on it . He must 've gotten it out of the wastebasket . That looks like dried blood to me . " The gaunt man walked over to him and took a look . " It sure as hell does , " he said , and turned to Alex 's people . " Can you explain how some bloody paper towels ended up in your family room wastebasket ? Any of you cut yourself today , use paper towels to clean up ? " " Looks like you folks don 't know anything about a lot of things that somehow mysteriously ended up in your house today , " the gaunt man said . " I wonder what we 'd find out if we tested the blood on these towels ? Would we maybe find out that it matches up with blood from the old man across the street ? " " Now you 're being silly , " the teacher said , sitting forward . " I 'm sorry to interrupt , Officer , but this really is unfair . You can 't expect these people to be able to account for every scrap of paper in their wastebaskets . Why , those towels could have been in that wastebasket for days - for weeks , even . Why don 't you give these poor people a break and forget about the silly towels ? I mean , you 've got enough evidence to arrest them already , haven 't you ? You don 't want to make a fool of yourself at the police station by making a big fuss about chewed - up paper towels , of all things . Just throw them away . " The gaunt man looked at her closely . " No , I don 't think I 'll throw them away , " he said . " I think I will have them tested . Who knows ? Maybe the blood won 't match up with the old man after all . Maybe it 'll match up with somebody else . " He turned to Alex 's people again . " So you think there was an intruder in your house today . Tell me this . Does your dog bite ? " " No , " the man said slowly , standing up . " But our cat scratches . " He pointed at the tall boy sitting in a straight - backed chair across the room . " Ask him why he 's wearing a long - sleeved sweater on such a hot night . Ask him to roll up his sleeves . " " How dare you ! " the boy 's mother cried , jumping up from her chair . " How dare you even think that my poor baby could have done anything wrong ! He gets chilled easily - that 's why he 's wearing long sleeves . I told you he was delicate . Go ahead , sweetheart . Show them you don 't have anything to hide . Roll up your sleeves . " " He shouldn 't have to , " the teacher said . " Officer , these people are so desperate that they 'll say anything and accuse anyone . I was sunbathing in my back yard all afternoon . If anyone had gone into their house , I would have seen it . I didn 't see a thing . So why don 't you just arrest these people and leave this poor boy alone ? " " I don 't believe it , " her husband said . " You 're trying to protect him . Is he another member of your little fan club ? Damn it ! I knew you 'd flirted with half the boys in the senior class last year - I didn 't realize you 'd reached down to the juniors , too . " That was when things got really confusing , with the teacher and her husband yelling at each other , and the boy 's mother shouting about how her innocent little baby would never have anything to do with a cheap tramp like the teacher , and the gaunt man and the stocky man trying to calm them down , and Alex 's people just sitting silently on the couch , clutching each other 's hands . And then the tall boy stood up so fast that he knocked his chair over , and glared at his mother , and rolled up his sleeves . His right arm was scored by long , angry red gashes . " Shut up , Ma ! " he said . " I 'm not an innocent little baby - I 'm a man . When the hell are you gonna realize that ? And I didn 't want to hurt anybody , but I 'd found a gun in the old man 's bureau , and when he walked in on me and started yelling about calling the cops , I panicked . I never meant to hurt him . I just wanted to snatch his baseball cards and sell them , so we 'd have enough money to go to Vegas . " " Oh , yeah ? " the tall boy demanded . " So if you weren 't here with me this afternoon , who stepped in the dog stuff in the basement ? Maybe you cops oughta check her shoes . Maybe you 'd better check the dog stuff in the basement , see if it 's got a print of a size six shoe with a pointy toe and a stiletto heel . " " I think we 'll do just that , " the gaunt man said . " Sergeant , get the lab team over here and tell them to collect the evidence . " He turned to Alex 's people and winked at the man . " I guess this is one time you won 't have to clean up the mess in the basement . " After that , things got better . All the neighbors left , two of them holding their hands behind their backs awkwardly . Some more people came and spent a little time in the basement , but they didn 't stay long . And then the gaunt man and the stocky man left , after shaking hands with all of Alex 's people - everyone seemed to be getting along just fine now . Alex 's people stayed in the living room for a long time , talking to each other in quick , excited voices , sometimes crying a little but mostly laughing , hugging each other repeatedly , hugging Alex every few minutes ; someone even tried to hug the kitten . Then somebody said something about dinner , and the man left in the car for a little while and came back with warm , fragrant bags of cheeseburgers . There were two cheeseburgers for Alex fixed just the way he preferred them - lots of ketchup , no pickle - and the girl ended up giving him most of her French fries , too , and the woman never said one word about being careful of Alex 's digestion . It was all very strange , especially since he 'd had his dinner hours ago , but he was too polite and too wise to point out their mistakes . The weeks that followed were even better . Every day , it seemed , somebody brought home special treats for Alex , or soup bones even though no one was making soup , or even a whole steak just for him . And now , when his people came home and found that he 'd knocked over a wastebasket and chewed up the contents , they patted him and hugged him and didn 't say a critical word . When he started to head for the basement , no one tried to stop him ; his people just pointed , and laughed , and told him to go ahead and enjoy himself . The man never complained about having to clean up messes any more , the woman never scolded , and the girl never got that sad look in her eyes . No doubt about it - Alex was now the most popular member of the household . Even the kitten started to treat him with respect . Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published . Required fields are marked * Comment Name * Email * Website We use reCaptcha to prevent comment spam . Click the box below before posting your comment . 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