Thanks very much So today what I want to do is try to talk about mob grazing and I guess mob grazing's probably been around for you know maybe ten years and When you talk to people and about you know, what is it? No one can give you a real definition and there was an extension a Agent in Nebraska Terry Gomper to did a study a survey of producers and basically, you know try to get some information about what that is and basically there's You know probably it's a high stocking density from maybe 20 to 25,000 pounds of live weight of animals to to maybe somewhere up towards a million pounds and and so People are moving livestock Perhaps once a day to to several times a day when you start moving to higher stock densities and With that One of the targets could be you know high trampling and high consumption of forage and another component to this of course is there's There's more labor that's involved and so there's really no you cannot no one's made a definition of what it is There are people that said it's a it's a high stock density or it's an ultra high stock density and and perhaps people throw out things like well Yeah, you know 25,000 pounds of live weight per acre is really kind of a Supped up manage intensive grazing and so really you've got to be up towards that 200,000 300,000 things like that, but when there's really no standard definition and no No, no group has come up with that definition. So basically I just kind of Showcase it as is really shared characteristics Usually when you're talking to To people about mob grazing or you're listening to gurus talk about mob grazing they're really talking about probably two things and one is what they call a landscaping and Where you're trying to improve the probably the soil health and the vegetation of that land so the idea is kind of Reclamation so there may be land that had been beat up in the past and you're really looking at trying to use the livestock in an intensive way to try to Get more of that Litter and that biomass above ground biomass and try to Trample it with livestock and get it in contact with that soil surface so you can let all that soil biota Do its work and try to add organic matter to that to that soil surface and And it also in that process where we're hearing people are are making improvements with that livestock action adding diversity to their systems Another aspect of about what's happening with as you increase that stocking density What we're fine is that we're actually getting increased harvest efficiency. So That translates to a higher carrying capacity. So what I mean about Harvest efficiency is that it's that percentage of the forage that's produced how much of that goes down the throat of the animal So in range Systems rangeland people we talk about utilization and utilization is actually the disappearance of that Vegetation not that has part to do with consumption, but it's also disappearance that's lost through maybe destructive forces such as trampling and consumption by wildlife and insects and those kind of things and the natural weathering process and so we've in in more semi-arid and arid systems where Perhaps some people have been using more season-long continues grazing when you have very large Pastures we've talked about concepts of take-off leave-off so that we're aiming for a 50% utilization and that means We're leaving 50% of that biomass for plant vigor for that plant community to sustain itself And so what's actually happening if we leave 50% and take 50% Really only half of that half that we're taking is actually going down the throat. So in our very Conventional systems under season-long continues grazing moderate stocking. We're only getting about 25% harvest efficiency So when you have that assumption and you make your calculations We can set that stocking rate and so Societies like the Society for Range Management that works with Ranchers and range professionals We've developed these kind of safety valves where we know in our In the way in the rangeland ecology that we can sustain that rangeland With a season-long continuous grazing model or system with taking a 25% harvest efficiency results in actually 50% utilization and Because we were having some of that force that's disappearing by insects and wildlife and then we're we're we're maintaining that that plant community integrity with a 50% utilization and so what we're finding is actually that mob grazing is kind of Ignoring this take-off leave-off rule and just blowing past that and we're getting much higher Efficiencies of harvest and so I'm going to show that we're actually getting somewhere towards 35 maybe 40 50 60 percent harvest efficiency and and that is not in a season-long continuous system So I'll have to bring together these concepts of of youths and then rest periods. It happens with the mob grazing so this study was funded through a research and education seer grant and we had Several producers that were contacted and were interested in and developing this these producers were already doing mob grazing and What what I wanted to do is to kind of come alongside them and say, you know We're not going to ask you to do anything different than you're doing What we'd like to do is actually document what you're doing so that we can share that with with the public and kind of understand You know, what is mob grazing for some people in South Dakota and actually This also had some other additional funding with it was a with an NRCS CIG grant where we we partnered with some Some people in Nebraska, so there's actually five other locations in Nebraska where they were kind of following similar similar protocols So you can see we've got a nice Gradient across the state of South Dakota on the east side across the west and we had a few partners up in the in the north and kind of this region close to Aberdeen and If you go if you look across South Dakota on the on the I 29 quarter on the eastern part of South Dakota We're probably 23 inch rainfall and you get out towards Rapid City, and then we're around 15 to 17 So in the middle of the state, they're probably around between 17 and 20 and further out We so we've got a nice understanding of that rainfall and how that looks in terms of the vegetation and We're going to see that people are adapting to that and they're doing things differently because of that So this is a stocking density kind of characterizing what people are doing in terms of the Thousands of pounds of beef per acre. So we've got a couple of these sites The new Underwood site and the Quinn site are out west Quinn is by wall South Dakota and the new Underwood is just by Rapid City And so you can see their stocking densities are somewhere around 20 to 25,000 and as you Move towards the east then we're but are typically what we're finding is there's somewhere around 50,000 pounds Per acre is our stocking density and in 2012 there was a quite a severe drought And so that definitely dropped the stocking rate the one outlier is actually reliance and That's actually showing on this graph at 300,000 He was actually at a million and he was doing that just for fun to try to demonstrate what that would look like So I think he was moving somewhere to 12 or 15 times A day to be able to achieve that so the he had I want to I think it was somewhere in the 300 pair that were on a piece of ground for 45 minutes And he had set up ahead of time some bat latches so that they were going off on timers And that's so the cattle were actually moving themselves And so and I wanted and then we had a comparison There was a rotation that that it was just moving once a day or twice a day that at 50,000 So and so he kind of has this really extreme. So it's kind of fun to fun to look at All right, there's a lot of information in this particular slide So I've got to take you through it to kind of draw out some really important things here So first of all what we did is we went and picked Four locations with a graduate student where we did some pretty Intensive of clipping of vegetation so we would take a quarter meter square and Run several transects and we would clip all that vegetation Prior to the cattle turning out onto these areas and then we would we would get the staining biomass And we'd get the litter of the old litter that was on the ground and then after the cattle were into that spot And they moved on to another spot we come back and locate those same transects And then we had put down another quarter meter square paired that up with the previous one And then we collected and separated stuff that was newly trampled the old litter and the stuff that was left standing So what we could do by subtraction is kind of get an estimate of disappearance Appearance of consumption and how much is newly trampled and those kind of things so the first part that you see The the the darker green is basically the the staining biomass of the vegetation before the cattle were put into it then the the gray bar is the post vegetation and The the lighter green in the middle This is the pre litter that was already existing and then this is the post the post litter And so some of that and theoretically should be the same if the cattle aren't eating litter which you wouldn't expect So there's going to be a little sampling here or there But one of the things that I want to draw your attention to is this last bar which would be the trampling so that's that new litter and so what I want to show is is if you make the Subtraction so you're starting with your pre biomass and then with your end biomass if you if you pull out how much was trampled Then you can get how much was consumed by livestock and so what I've put down here is the harvest efficiency So these numbers are the percent of that was down the throat of The existing the pre biomass vegetation so you can see that there's a Wide variety, but you but it's more than our typical If we plan a season long continuous grazing at moderate levels that's at base 25 percent So why why these producers are doing this is because they're getting with this intensive Stocking densities up to that 25 to 50,000 to 200 or maybe a million is is they're getting higher harvest efficiencies so to put this in perspective if you think about in Western, South Dakota with our our stocking rates are about a half of AUM per acre and that Translates to probably a stocking density for a six-month grazing season that's less than 500 pounds of live weight per acre and If you come over to the east side of the state where we have stocking rates somewhere Maybe one and a half to maybe two AUM's per acre at a traditional rotation You might be at five, you know moving cattle once a week We might be at five thousand pounds per acre of live weight And so what we're seeing is even though when we go up to twenty five thousand pounds That doesn't seem like a lot, but it's you know It's probably five times more intensive than our typical rotations that we used to be doing You know when we're starting to move livestock once a day and so one of our producers that that's by hay tie You know, he was moving Cattle twice a day and his stocking densities were closer to that two hundred thousand the Chamberlain was around fifty thousand pounds per acre so part of it is going to be the vegetation so what we've been finding is that in As the vegetation is shorter and in a vegetative state They tend not to trample as much because it's sparser Then and what they're doing is they're consuming more and it's actually hard to get newly trampled so out at this Quinn site, you know, we've we've got about maybe 20% of that is getting trampled and and interestingly enough at the Chamberlain site You know, they're not trampling that much, but at hay tie They were getting a little bit more trampled and the hay tie site a little Was about or about the same as productivity of the Chamberlain, but it has to do with you know If that vegetation gets taller, you know, they're more apt to probably knock some of that down So from the land, there's a remember the two goals that why people are probably doing this There's a landscaping goal where you really want to trample that Vegetation to try to build soil health, you know get more land covered and then there's kind of maybe a stocking carrying capacity stocking rate You know a harvest efficiency goal where you're trying to get more consumption and maintaining animal performance And so in that same net standpoint Then what we're probably meeting, you know that those goals from that that increase harvest efficiency So this is where the economics play in that You're spending your time, you know, most of the producers Probably spend about a half an hour maybe an hour at most to move the livestock a day and It's it's paying off in terms of they're able to you know, increase that stocking density And in getting that higher harvest efficiency And so what we're finding is that how how do they do that if these harvest efficiencies and these Utilization rates remember utilization is basically the consumption plus trampling and so those are pretty high Notice if you just calculate Utilization that would be your pre vegetation Minus the post vegetation and that difference is really high. So a lot of times we're getting 80 percent utilization and of that 80 percent Maybe 40 or so of it is is down the throat the other 40 may be trampled or you know, there's some proportion of those and so from a as a trained person in the range science that is Stressful because we're thinking oh, we're blowing past take half leave half and and that can't be good for the plant community Is that actually a sustainable practice? So had to wrestle with with these concepts. So so here's what's happening You graze a piece of land for one day or for half a day and you're not coming back to it for a whole year So they're getting a long rest period. You've got a very intensive You know utilization very high, but a lot of rest. So what I like to do to translate What this means to me is let's for example, let's say you you're harvesting a hayfield Well, we harvest hay pretty much every at the same time every year. So let's say you have a hayfield It's July 1st You come in with your sycamore mower and you cut it down at you know a few inches off the ground you're probably getting 80 90 percent harvest harvest efficiency and We do that for 50 hundred years whatever and it comes back and you get the same productivity every single year Obviously, there's fluctuations based on you know rainfall, but that's a sustainable practice because it's always producing about the same amount So if we switch to these higher stocking density kind of systems where we're only on that piece of ground for half a day or for a day Essentially, we're kind of taking that same concept and and applying it to livestock. So the livestock are the mower Yeah, they're not getting 80 or 90 percent of it They're maybe getting 40 and knocking down 40 or they're getting 60 and knocking down 20 But you get the point that because we have such long rest periods up to a year It does not hurt the vegetation Now we know that Some of the rest periods some of that time period, you know, it's gonna be dormant season. So when we talk about resting for a entire year There are times when you can rest land in the winter. It does really no good It's gonna be key on what's the growth rate of these plants afterwards So if you graze these things in a stage where they're the grasses in a boot stage and you hit it hard every year You're probably gonna set it back because plants are most vulnerable in the boot stage If you wait till the plants are headed out and graze it that time of year, you're probably not gonna hurt the plants Because when plants have headed out, they've put down most of what they need from the root structure So when I think about simplistic way of grazing and what kind of impact am I gonna have below ground is just think about When the plant is tall, it's probably tall below ground when the plant is short It's by short below ground. So depending upon when you graze that's kind of reflective of the impact that you're gonna have below ground So when we graze when the plant is tall, we're not gonna hurt it because it's probably set a lot of You know root structure on a side note I had a grad student that at our vulgicite which was near Brookings to kind of play around with different stocking densities So we had our producers where we we let them do what they wanted to do and and the kind of vary between 25 up to maybe 200,000 pound stocking rate And so what we wanted to do was look at stocking rates from from 50,000 pounds up to 800,000 pounds So what we did is we just we would put the enough for one day or two days Or we would go towards, you know moving maybe Eight times a day or ten times a day those kind of things and so we buried that and then we did the same thing We went ahead Into the paddock before they came and clipped the samples separated into those standing vegetation litter and then we allowed the animals to graze those paddocks and then we pulled them off and then We went back to those same areas and put down a sample next to this area that we clipped before and then we had the new Trampled we had the old litter and we had the standing vegetation. So what I'm showing you is the utilization so the remember the utilization is what was Is the pre vegetation and you subtract off the post so utilization is consumption plus trampling and And in 2012 we had that we had that drought and so we had some issues, of course Didn't want to hurt the grass and and didn't have as much forage and then in 2013. It was a little bit wetter And so what you see is kind of is that? What are we achieving? You know how much of the cattle eating and knocking things down and what it kind of appears that? Is that how much it's at what stocking density is enough? Is a 50,000 pound stock density enough to achieve some of these things do you need a hundred do you need 200 you need 400 800 because we have producers Throughout North America that are going from anywhere from that 25 to 50 that maybe are going up to like Dennis Neil Dennis up in Canada that may be up towards a million And so is there kind of this law diminishing returns is like how much is enough? And so what we found is that you know in that that there's a You know an increase in utilization and it kind of levels off and the same kind of thing here Is that there's there's only so much you can do and so what we're finding out is that you know? Yeah, maybe You know at 50,000 pounds depending upon the the vegetation We're where we're at You know maybe 200,000 pounds isn't is enough in that and that may be moving twice a day in in higher rainfall environments, but at 200,000 pounds of stocking weight or live weight in Western environments with less vegetation you have to move several times a day So and then part of the other thing was just to kind of compare this to two folks that are doing mob grazing So at some of the sites they had a comparison that we could do with mob grazing and here This is just ocular estimates of the grass cover So it wasn't the veggie it wasn't clipping the vegetation But we would make these ocular estimates of before and after and and so what I'm showing you again Is the is the before you go into the paddock and then the after and then you can make those Subtractions to get at that utilization and and kind of consumption things and so what we're showing here is that yeah They're getting more they're getting more utilization Compared to the rotation with the mob grazing same thing So when you just look at mob versus rotation So so the bottom line is you know again just reiterate. Why are people wanting to do this? Why are they intensifying this? Rotational grazing with this mob grazing and it really comes comes down to it is that They're gaining a higher harvest efficiency. There's that Higher we're getting higher utilization, but it's a safe practice because we're only on that Piece of land for just one day and it gets to be rested the other parts of the year So here are some just some pictures of before and after So this is a 57,000 pounds stock density just you know Moving once a day. So that's what it looks like another graduate student looked at some some of the the weeds and so we looked at Western snowberry, which is a native shrub and we also looked at some of the the Thistles and as you increase that stocking density cattle then tended to to utilize some of those Broadleaf plants that they normally wouldn't do so that's part of it as well This is the one that was that Reliance a sandy soil where he grazed at that million pounds. They're only on that on a piece of land for I think it was a third of an acre 45 minutes with a 300 pair and so they really trampled it and really high distribution of Dung and then the there's where the the rotation for 12 hours on 55,000 so you get a much higher utilization So here's new preset new litter cover. This is again an ocular the the one that was Quinn and The new Underwood sites are really far west and so Only 5% maybe 10% new litter. These are areas that were receiving 15 inches of rainfall And it's just darn hard To get new litter. I mean when you're there, there's a lot of space in between plants So can mob grazing be used for landscaping in semi-arid arid environments? it's very challenging because there's not a lot of biomass to begin with and To and in order to maintain performance. There's not much to trample and This is dung density So we we looked at the paths per meter square and so that's one of the things is that the work were increasing Utilization and getting more evenly distribution of density of the excrement We had a couple tours for the researchers on the project in 20 in 2012 and 2013 and we also made some videos if you want to just Go to the South Dakota grassland coalition SD grass.org you can find these videos you can search you can Google them or go on to YouTube and you'll find them Pat Guptel is the one by Quinn Charlie Totten's by Chamberlain and then Rick Smith is by Watertown and those are available to look at So bottom line is producers are getting a higher harvest efficiency We've also taken soil samples to document carbon, but we haven't got all our soil samples Analyzed and so we're we're still waiting for those but what I would say is that I Don't expect soil carbon to probably increase. That's a slow process Especially you think about those Western environments where there's not a lot of new litter being added It's that's not the mechanism for it to happen when you're only getting 5% new litter on the ground It much makes a lot more sense that you probably can increase soil carbon as you move further east Or there's a lot of biomass and you can get it trampled on the ground. Does that make sense? So my guess is that we're going to see these benefits Return to us from the higher harvest efficiency to pay for the labor and make make these ranches more sustainable and These guys are only doing it for maybe 60 days It's not sustainable to kill yourself Working that hard either and so there's there's reason you know a time period which what's they're doing for so what we're gonna We're expecting a graduate student in the econ department to finish up his thesis here this semester And then we're gonna be able to put that economic analysis that he'll do When we write our final report So the question is how many how big are the paddocks? So they'll rain they're typically five acres of what and then it's just depending upon how many pair so the one by Chamberlain he would give four to five acres and he'd have 250 pair The one producer that's since by Selby. He's actually here today He's I think he's around four or five acres and that same kind of thing So they're at that 50,000 pound stocking density So the question was did the did the producers increase their overall stocking rate for the year and I would say for yes For that piece of ground they are increasing their stocking rate their carrying capacity So these typically are our older crop our cropland long time ago been planted back to to introduce species and They're purposely getting more bang for the buck on that spot There are some the one in reliance it was native or not reliance the one by Chamberlain was native and We think with with the system that he's doing He's probably a two and a half times higher than the typical nrcs recommended Take half leave half for season long. So we are getting higher stocking rates for those pieces of land Native most of them are these old cropland that was in the West. It's crested Yep crested week crested wheatgrass alfalfa out West intermediate wheatgrass wheatgrass Broomegrass kind of things Kentucky bluegrass and the central the one in hay tie by Watertown Rick Smith. It's a Planted back blue stem big blue stem kind of thing and and so What they're doing is they're intensifying on land That can handle that but remember it's getting rested for a essentially year So they're watching body condition we didn't have weights and most people don't take the weights But you can tell the producers that they're doing this for 30 days or 60 days And then they kind of go back to a rotation where they're getting moved You know once a month once a week twice a week kind of thing so they can cows can compensate There's compensatory gain. So even if they're challenged a little bit for through two days or 60 days You'll find that they will make that up in a later period It's mostly yep everybody that we're working with our cow calf pairs except Pat Guptel that he's got bread heifers and I should mention Gary that's some Cliff Milseps over by Gary. He's got steers. So he's around 17,000 pound stock density and he's actually moving through maybe two to three times a year So he wants to make sure he has good animal performance to put gain on steers So there's two people that have yearlings every else's cow calf pair


Greetings, everyone. This is James P. Madonna of Megalife 21 and Progressive Discussions. And before I go on to do my next video talk show, I am stopping by from my immediate area off Route 17 South in Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey, the one and only, the famous Bendix Diner as seen on the Jerry Seinfeld Netflix series, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. That's right. It is in my close area and I love it here. Outstanding food, outstanding coffee and I will go in soon before I go on to do my next show. James P. Madonna of Megalife 21 and Progressive Discussions here. And aside from the famous Bendix Diner in Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey, Route 17 South, right behind the famous Teterboro Airport where everyone with private jets lands who wish to visit New York City. We are right next door, directly next door to the famous Banana's Comedy Club in the Holiday Inn on Route 17 South in Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey and there it is. 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It's like, it's at least a few hundred. Okay. I've done this before. No, but that's just Pennsylvania. Well, look at that. Oh, it changed course.  It's the Pope's birthday yesterday. I said so. It's my birthday too. Saturday. Are you going to call me? It's like, and then the person says, well, it's a big thing to me because I'm devout. So what about any? What about any other? Any other person's birthday? Is he going to? Yeah. Right. Is he going to call William? I hope you have a nice time. Hope you have a nice day. So what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to go? Oh, yippee. Everything is beautiful. When I said the original, the old guy. You want to tell me what's good? I said, okay. I said, I asked you a question. I deserve an answer. What's good? Yeah, you know how many people say I'm. Can you answer me? What's good?  People say I'm, I'm being negative. I'm negative. 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What if senior citizen has an as or has an as an attack Way more than the other Why don't you carry both ends of the spectrum here?  He had the same time once you've done it. Wendy. She told me wanted to help that passed out Of course your life Wendy's they passed out Oh, so the daughter took over Wendy's the chubby one She's the original redhead.  I got so many reviews You go on google. I have a big I got a big review like this on this place and other places Micro center in paterson. Yeah, micro center in paterson. They sell computer stuff. It's huge My friend bought a desktop daughter was brand new was on sale. It was sitting in the warehouse for seven years I I put a review and you know the owner contacted me Saw the review overnight. He says I want to discuss it. You know, I emailed him. He hasn't he hasn't replied back to me Just was one of the best performance they were Well, look at the location Who's one of the best how are they in? Look at us the airport the airport Buses come in here.  This was a money Making store if they opened up a Popeye's next store. They would do great if they opened up a um, a whatever They do a tronics. They do a tronics. We're gonna do good It's total I don't want any. I don't want to look when he's so tough I don't want drive through because I always wash my hands before I eat. I don't if you touch money every talk He was human talk to me Jason Don't talk to me. I did I'm the one that calls the board of health. I didn't call him. I went up there I called Osher up from my phone. I got fed up. I got fed up of coming here, right?  You know why I Hack and sack was uh by path mark brother the former path mark.  The girl was handling money And she was using making bagel sandwiches with the with the gloves on and she was touching money I said you don't do that. Every low life touches money. All right Hack and sack the park uh board health says there's no proof that germs are money.    They use them to find truffles They use a pigs organ But wouldn't it be funny if somebody can't eat pork and they and they You remember how bad it was labor day one day how high unit It was only at 4th of July. It was like a Over a hundred I can And now it's comfortable now I can feel I honestly oh he complains He complains about he oh, you know what he tells me you know, he tells me I talk too much get to the point I said bill sometimes my stories In other words, when you tell a story sometimes there's this fact Yeah, I said sometimes you got to add more facts to it I says you ever hear about writers and any board day and god rest his soul. He was a writer In the winter if they don't turn the heat up I'm flipping over there They got rid of the cable. We don't have cnn no more. We got to watch this This uh passable degenerate. I don't complain about that. I don't complain about that Uh, cnn you're not a cnn fan. I watch your home. Yeah me too Whatever I can watch Chris Cuomo whoever's on Yeah, Anderson I got the light there David I said, you know the most important thing about this Your health your employee. Oh, I mean here your first thing in the employee If you don't take care of the customer that you hear your employee You've got to kind of I was a team for ten years I Yeah, I'm an old school democrat old school The bag over here Uh, it might be a bomb. Be careful Looks like this. Yeah, right exactly Exactly It's a bandit. It's a bandit. I'm just gonna go over and grab the bag now. It's suspicious Any any abandoned They're gonna put it in a lost in town. Oh, wow It's like a full it's a full gym bag. We went back to Can we do that? It's a dollar the two dollars Every friday I go to the royal hibachi buffet, you know saddle book by the walmart and lou 46 west Saddle set up $10. They got fresh seafood nothing frozen You know any seafood you don't eat seafood none. No shrimp the lobster on this Okay, billy likes seafood right billy. Yeah But they got they got barbecue too. They got lamb. Oh, I love leg of lamb You ever see Brian boo No, I came in once to take care of his stepmother So he's that what he's I haven't seen him in a year or so He came in about two months ago. He's vanished What he's vanished No, he's uh The stepmother Taking care of her saved some money. He never came in unless crystal was here for some reason that was odd I thought he came here at 10 o'clock in the morning when he came back here Yeah, he used to what he was teaching. He'd only be here when crystal was here. So why are you only here when crystal's here? No, he ain't came here in the morning No, that was after he retired not when he was teaching I said, why are you here only with crystals here? What's going on Brian something going on Uh, well all the way he attached himself to her her daughter. That was Yeah, I said that come on Brian, what are you doing there?  She thought she had Who the other woman or Eileen? That's on yeah Well, there's a homeless shelter living I don't take nobody home.  I can say what car. I don't know. It's not the one with georgia plates No, that's a different one.  Really? Really Yeah, I see, huh? Wow, skinny little bro. It's about that high. You're very very thin very thin and very tall That's what happened to you. Who hit you? Oh, it's a long story.  You had the other eye black now. You got this one Long story She's trying to prosecute herself or something.  I don't even talk to your buddy Who's that? Your friend. I have a lot of friends. Which one?  Oh, but uh, oh I ran into an old girl that I knew from the players club a woman She looked a crap if she looked like she was halfway one foot on the banana peel one foot in the grave She looked at this woman. Oh my god. She looked spotless Yeah, she was clean. Yeah But what the problem is They grabbed her up at the hospital And it says she's a cracker She's not she wasn't she wouldn't she did just somebody down on the reception that says She's a cracker. They kept her in the hospital. They didn't run up. They did this to her I got pitching to her what they did to her You were sure the guy that comes in here. I can check that's just pure greed that house You like holy name and tinnock You know a holy name did to me as an outpatient they charged my insurance over $20,000 just to take up space in the room waiting as an outpatient What a red and they paid it too. I said to united health care I said, what's wrong with you people? Why why do you count out to these hospitals like that? Well, I don't know my sign. I have signage trouble. I would have trouble with Mount Sinai So get it Sinai Sinai When you get the other eye black and there's there's some suspicious I didn't know she I'd seen a place. She had to take place I think it's a gold color car. She had joy Yeah, it's like a like a peach on it or something He dropped some sir dropping it.  They pay off the lawyer. I mean they got too many So in other words if I went to a malpractice lawyer and didn't involve hack and sack I don't You mean I have to get a lawyer from another region to go after hack and sack Yeah, I need it. Yeah, because you need a lawyer that goes right for the jugular vein right for the right for the neck I I His his lawyer that took care of him was great But could have no so Be nice of you. I got a hundred billion dollars. But you know How the heck did that old lady way back when get millions in it? Do that. Oh my god. That's what happens. I've been in the emergency room Did you see everything yet?   I brought a public transportation in the united states How how it's in shambles how it's a dinosaur? He says you have any other questions? He blew me off and he wants to put his political sign on my lawn. I told the girl No, no You can't take pictures All over the house an emergency where they play don't take no pictures Interesting even from your phone you can't do it right? That's how I got the pictures. This is an emergency You can't take pictures. Yeah, because because I got a guilty conscience All right, Bobby. Good luck I tell you that's break up that broke my heart seeing the woman in the wheelchair That really heartbreaking Oh god Yeah after seeing that It makes you think yeah, what is good? Getting back to your first question. What is good? I don't know that's heartbreaking yet And what and what and what they did to her over there? Well for him to say valley's a great hospital that that means a lot Oh gosh gotta go to um Whiskey cafe somewhere Try to break break the monotony It's supposed to touch down tonight, right? Gotta be kidding. He's got kids Gee you have children I would pick evacuation via kids I mean if you don't care about your own life do it for the kids They're in for a rude awakening tonight This has been a mega live 21 production


Okay, so we're on to our second talk of the morning and we're going to hear Gemini, elastic proofs for diverse environments. Take it away. Hello. Hi. So, yeah, this talk is concerned mostly with proving very, very large circuits. This is a joint work with Jonathan Buto, Alessandro Chiesa, and Jonson Hu. So, we're going to focus on succinct arguments. You already heard the description just in the previous talk, but essentially we have this dialogue between the prover and the verifier. At the end of this dialogue, the prover should be able to convince the verifier that there exists a witness that satisfies some relation. Arguments means that the security of this protocol relies on computational assumptions. Succinct means that the verification power is less than the witness. We will actually focus on preprocessing succinct arguments, which means that the verification time is even lower than the size of the statement. So, we put a lot of effort in this kind of proof systems. Snarks belong in this class, and we know how to do them. We spent a lot of time proving time, verification time. Now we were almost optimal in both cases, but not so much on space. In fact, if right now we were to use a practical proof systems like Marlin or Spartan, for millions of gates, they would just crush. We are not able to prove very large instances. As we try to deploy these proof systems in the real world, so it grows the need for being able to prove larger and larger circuits. For instance, if we just consider the compression function of chart 256, this is like 30,000 constraints. If you put it in a miracle tree, or you try to verify different transactions, you're already far outside benchmarks that we put in papers. And if you multiply it by like a thousand times, because you're like doing ZK rollups, then you really cannot do not have a proof system that works in the real world that can deal with these sort of circuits. So there has been already some literature on how to build a space efficient succinct arguments, mostly TCC papers. Initially, we've been working a lot on recursive proofs as a mean of preserve time and space, as Yusef just mentioned in the previous talk, but more recently we've been talking more about streaming provers, and provers that can produce a proof after receiving the inputs as a stream. What do I mean by this? I mean that in practice, the prover gets as input a stream of data, then runs, it will run actually in logarithmic space, and then produce a proof. In theory, sorry, even more in a real world scenario, what do I imagine? Imagine my phone that is unloading an instance and then producing a proof. In theory, what do I mean? I mean that we have a Turing machine that does not have the input in random access, but has an oracle, and this oracle can give me next element, next element, next element, and then I can also ask to seek at the beginning of the file. This Turing machine must run in sort of log space. We build on the top of this model, and we introduce this idea of elasticity. What does it mean elasticity? It means that you have a proofing algorithm that admits two different implementations. One that is inefficient, one is space efficient. The verifier couldn't care less about which setup was used in order to create this proof. In particular, we build up. We say that these creatures exist, and we propose a proof system for circuit satisfiability that admits two different prioritizations, one that is linear time and one that is log space. The other, we like to have the two of them, but until then we have this sort of different type of configuration, and in particular, the proof is independent from the configuration that we choose and the verification run in log time. In addition to that, our proof system has the peculiarity that it is possible to move from space efficient to time efficient in the middle of the proving execution, in the execution of the prover, and we will see what this means in a second. In addition to that, the space complexity, the complexity of the space efficient prover, this was also known in previous works, but we improve on that in that if the circuit exists as a particular structure, it's like an inner product relation, or it's a finite state machine, then this can actually go down to N log N. We build this proof system for an NP-complete relation, rank one constraint system. Why do we choose this relation? Because it's what people use in practice, and it is easy to build this relation from a circuit. What do I mean by as a circuit? I mean addition and multiplication gates, and if I have this circuit with addition and multiplication gates, then I can build a matrices, A, B, and C, where size will depend on the size of the circuit for which, if the circuit is satisfied, then there will exist a Z, possibly different from zero, for which this is satisfied, and this dot here means Hadamard product. How do I build it? Very easy. In A, I put the left inputs, left wires for the multiplication gate, so one, one, and then all zeros. In B, I put the right input wires, and in C, I put the output wires. What does it mean? It means that if I do AZ now, I get Z0 plus Z1, BZ, Z2, multiplication of them, Z3. I do this for all the multiplication constraints. There you go. I enforce that the circuit is satisfied. Now if I give you this relation as input to the prover, then the prover can build the proof. But what does it mean to have streaming access to this relation? Well, we define it, and it means for us that I give you streaming access to the vector Z, so I give you the element one by one, first to last up. I give you access to the matrices, but what does it mean to give you streaming access to a matrix? It has two dimensions. It means that I give you access in row major and in column major. The prover decides which one to take. In addition, I will give you also what we call the computation trace, which is essentially like the addition in the circuits, namely AZ, BZ, and CZ. And if the circuit has a particular structure, again, it is possible to build this inner product in a space-efficient manner inside. And in fact, in the paper, we have this notion of composability of streams, where you can give as input many streams. You can build a new stream that can be fed into another procedure. So all these relations are linear relations. So what I'm going to talk about is what I think is sort of the cornerstone protocol here, which is the inner product. Once we have inner products, it's very easy to do matrix, vector, and multiplication, and it's very easy to do Hadamard product. And for the more technical people, what I'm going to provide is a polynomial interactive proof for inner product. This protocol will be later composed with a polynomial commitment scheme. And in our paper, we have this theorem that says if you have an elastic idealized protocol, if you have an elastic commitment scheme, then guess what? You can combine them, and the result is elastic still. So there is something that is already elastic and that has been going on for a while in the literature, and these are like protocols that are inspired from some check or folding arguments. And all these protocols have this nice structure where I go from a claim of size n into a claim of half the size. And then I invoke it recursively until I end up with a claim that is trivial, the size one, and that the verifier can check immediately. In particular, at every round, the verifier is sending me one random coin, and the verifier is using this randomness to what we call fold the instance. For instance, I can do even or not folding, which is more inspired from FFT, or I can do left and right folding. That's essentially the same thing. And as I go on through the protocol, I will have these linear combinations of the randomness with pieces of the vector. Until at the end, the verifier will have to check these smaller instances, which are actually multivariate polynomial evaluations, or at least that's the way that I want you to see them for now. Now, we know how to run these protocols in linear time. Why? Because over here I'm doing, oops, something is that, okay. Because over here I'm doing n divided by two multiplications, then I will do n divided by four, then I will do n divided by eight. This is linear, no? And but how do I do it in a spatial efficient manner? And actually we prove that you can, we show that you can also do it in linear time construct the foldings. How do we do it in a spatial efficient? Well, you have as input the stream of F. What is the stream of F? Are all the coefficients, no? One by one by one, etc, etc. And I keep a stack. And in this stack, I can start feeding elements from the stream. And as soon as I have two elements of the same level, well, I fold them with a respective randomness. And then I keep ingesting elements. As soon as I have two elements of the same level, then I fold them. Again of the same level, I fold them until I end up with the coefficients that I want and then I can return it. How much space does this thing take? Log n, because I will keep at most true elements for every level. How much time will it take? Still linear, no? Because I'm doing n divided by two multiplications, plus n divided by four, plus n divided by eight, and so on and so forth. And so at the end, because I will have to run this protocol log times, I will end up with a protocol that can use log space. And overall, n log n time. But this protocol has another particularity that is sort of the little nudge of our proof system that you can explore this recursive structure in such a way that you can fix a memory budget. You can say, now my prover is going to take one gigabyte of memory. You fix a threshold, and then you can run the space efficient prover until you reach a level where the instance can be written in memory. And then from then, you can use the time efficient algorithm. So you have a proof system that can run optimally for certain sizes, and as soon as you hit very large instances, you will use streaming algorithms. So this is sort of the basic idea. And once you reach the end, what you have is this sort of multivariate evaluation that needs to be taken care of. And sort of in the ideal world, when we work with polynomial IOP, we have these very fiery tasks for a multivariate evaluation. And in reality, what does it mean? It means that the prover will commit to a polynomial and then provide an evaluation proof. Actually, in the paper, we're able to reduce this multivariate query to univariate queries, generically. And why is this useful? Because then we can get rid of the multivariate part and use just a univariate polynomial commitment scheme. Why is this useful? Because if I end up using things like KZG, the verification time is much more efficient. We're talking about log pairings versus true pairings. It's relevant.  So we work on KZG. And KZG is sort of pretty streaming friendly. Just as a reminder, we already talked about this a bit in the previous talk. But the commitment key is these consecutive hours of tau, where tau is selected during setup and is never shared afterwards, not with the prover, not with the verifier. And the commitment algorithms will consist in the multi-scala multiplication of the commitment key with the polynomial f. Does it mean to do this in a space efficient manner? It means that I have the coefficients of f, no? In a streaming way, so one by one. And the same for the commitment key. And I will build a commitment on the top of it by accumulating the product of these elements. So I will do the scalar multiplication of these things together. Now how do I do evaluation? Evaluation in KZG is a clean and division by the polynomial x minus alpha. So I get the quotient, I get the reminder. The reminder is the evaluation of f in alpha.  So what do we do? We essentially do pen and pencil division by x minus alpha. We get the streaming of f top to last coefficient. And then we produce the stream of q by using Ruffini's law. So the first is the first of the quotient. Then I apply recursively by using this. I apply Ruffini's law by using that requires me to store only the previous coefficient of the quotient. And so this can be done in a constant memory. Okay, so now we have this polynomial commitment scheme. We have this polynomial IOP. We put them together. We get a proof system that is elastic. We try to go down to the implementation. We actually implement it. And implementing it requires quite some engineering effort. Why? Because you end up having to build the whole polynomial commitment stack. And we have an implementation for a multivariate polynomial commitment scheme and one for KZG. You have to build in a product. And from here you can build directly as NARG. But what we go up for is a pre-processing NARG. So we have to build, the prover needs to be even more work. And there are some others of protocols that need to be implemented. Some of which are not necessarily trivial to implement in a stream of fashion. And in addition to that, because we have this elastic notion, you have to implement them twice essentially. Because you have to build the time efficient implementation and then the space efficient implementation and then how to move from one to the other. And so given that we have this sort of modular framework, we started trying to push some stuff into artworks so that it can be also reused into other projects. So for instance now, we have three different implementations of KZG in artworks. And for instance, for novices or PhD students, it would be a nice project to try to see whether this can all be merged and we can have a unique implementation that is both space efficient and time efficient depending on the setup that you want. And that has, for instance, other things like multipoint proofs. And just more on the technical side, how do we implement them? This is all implemented in Rust. And there are many ways in which these things can be implemented in Rust. One of them is by using the stream libraries of Rust which provides sort of a generic interfaces. But we actually go for iterators. So if you are familiar with Python, we are really just using iterators for building streams of our elements and then composing them. But because Rust has this very strong type system, we end up having to embed within the type, the whole computation tree. So if you have a matrix and then you're doing matrix vector operations and then you're doing algebraic caching on the top, you have this type that gets more and more complicated and you have to work with that. And this is the price for having a very efficient implementation. And so we end up benchmarking these and sort of what is the takeaway from these? Is that while in papers, generally we stop at like millions of gates. So around two to the 20, we go up until two to the 37. This is like statistical parameter security. And even if we try to use our own time prover on a large machine that has 72 gigabytes of memory, we stop at around two to the 27. And so all of this space that you see here, these are the things that we can recover through streaming techniques. We also have some stats for pre-processing, the stop I bit earlier, but I wanted to stop and think about one thing. In the theorem, we have this n log square n and this line is a straight line. And the reason for this is that the log factor doesn't really kick in and the biggest, and I mean, this is sort of a general thing for proof system, the biggest are still the cryptographic operations. The new discovery modification is really what takes most part in a proof system and that's why we don't have really this log square factor kicking in yet. And the same goes for space. If I set up my space budget to be large enough, in our case around one gigabyte, then even though the space is supposed to grow logarithmically, we have this nice flat line where you can just let a prover run for as much time as you want and you will just occupy one gigabyte until the end of the execution. And yeah, so the bottom line is if you care about logarithmic factor, you should also care about constants. And so yeah, these are some resources and sort of wrapping up. We have this proof system that is sort of a, this idea of elasticity is essential. You have a proof system that can be implemented in a time-efficient way or in a space-efficient way. And we find a way of also merging the two together. Thank you. Thank you for the call, too. That was, yeah, really cool. Okay, I'll start with my question, because not when I was thinking of another one. Have you got a call application of this? Is there a call application where you really want to prove something that's so huge, you can't get it in memory? ZK rollups, I think, are one of them. Like you have a lot of transactions that you need to prove at once and you need to provide a proof for it. And these transactions are really like in the order of thousands of them. And you have many more to prove in them. I think, actually, you've got many local trees. You've got to prove many hashes at once. Or like hash chains. A thousand times the size of a hash function is really quite big. Yeah, yeah. And we also chatted with some of the Filecoin people, but I think for them it's also important to have the proof that they're small. In our case, our proof are logarithmic size, our log size with the size of the circuit. Okay. Yep. I just had a quick question. Did you look at other polynomial commitments that are streaming friendly or is it just KZG? So in KZG, the particularity, I guess, is that we are doing division by a low-degree polynomial. And that's really what buys us this idea of streaming easily. If I already move into Lagrange basis, where I have to divide potentially by a polynomial that has a high degree, then I don't know how to do streaming. Other polynomial commitment, like PST, which admits a trusted setup, we can also do streaming on them. Like a bullet-post slide or fly-based. These are more like inner products, and on them, yeah, I guess the idea there is a similar to inner product, I think. Yeah. So on a general level, how do you see the future of Skate?  I don't know. I think there are multiple directions. No, there is the streaming direction. There is the direction of recursing and then like incrementally verifiable computational recursive proofs. And then there is also the MPC direction. And I'm really sure which one will take off. And also I think maybe there are even different applications. Like if you do recursion, you have to embed the verifier circuit into the prover and this is a big overhead. Whereas if you do streaming, maybe it's easier. And if you do MPC as well, I don't know. I really have no idea. Thanks for the talk. Obviously what would be better, it would be to have both base and time efficiency. So you wouldn't have to switch. But it wasn't so clear for your presentation to me at least, when you presented the streaming version for the inner product argument, I think the slide 15 or so. Why you wouldn't be able to get also optimal time? So when you're folding each time, you will have an instance of size n divided by two that then you fold in n divided by four. When you're doing streaming, you cannot store the partial instance, that's the partial folding in memory. So every time you have to go through the previous folding to build the next one. Because you cannot store it in memory, literally. And so I think there is really these, on the bigger level, I think there is really this memory space, it is the space and time trade-off that is very common in like, I don't know dynamic programming or like Divided Impera where you have, you can either choose to use a lot of space and then you have a fast algorithm. So you have a spatial efficient one, but then you have a higher time complexity. I think it really boils down to that. And I'm not sure it's even possible. Yeah, but good question. Thanks. Any other questions? Going once, going twice? No, okay. Thank you very much. That was really cool. Cheers.


This study examined the effects of various drilling parameters on thrust force, exit burr formation, changes in the microtool, and drilled hole diameters during the microdrilling of an aluminum polyethylene composite panel, LPE. The panel consisted of 3,501 series aluminum skin materials bonded to a polyethylene, PE, core. 5 control parameters were used to design the tests, cutting speed, feed rate, tool diameter, tool point angle, and tool material, LTN or uncoated. The results showed that tool point angle had the greatest positive influence on thrust force at the upper aluminum plate, while cutting speed had the greatest positive influence at the lower aluminum plate. Tool point angle also had the greatest positive influence on burr height at the lower aluminum plate.  This article was authored by Bikur Yeltsin, Ali Yuxal, Kubalaya Slantas, and others. We are article.tv, links in the description below.


What is up my Cranky Crew? It's Ethan from CrankGameplays, and today we are here in the Stairest, the Stanley Paribas! The Stanley Parable Ultra, Ultra Deluxe is what I think is Ultra Deluxe? Okay. The Makers of the Stairly. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Jesus Christ, I haven't recorded anything in such a long time. The wonderful people that made the original Stanley Parable have, I don't know if they've remade it or really what. I was talking to Sean about it because he's in LA right now. We've been hanging out, and he told me that I should play it because I played the Stanley Parable way, way, way, long time ago. I'll link that in the description slash, I'll make a card for it. I don't even remember when I played that, but I definitely did. So, I wanted to play the Stanley Parable again because apparently it's just as, if not more amazing than it was before. Here we go, we remember it. Oh, it's at the computer down there and it goes on forever. How far can you go, editor? You're playing the Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe. Let's begin the game. I played the Stanley Parable, I think back when it first came out, which I can't remember. This is the story of a man named Stanley. Hee hee hee, I remember that voice. Stanley worked for a company in a big building where he was employee number 427. Hell yeah, gamer. Employee number 427's job was simple. This is bringing back so much. This is just a room 427 and he pushed buttons on the keyboard. Orders came to him through a monitor on his desk, telling him what buttons to push, how long to push them, and in what order. This is what employee 427 did every day of every month of every year. Wow, wow, wow. And the workers might have considered it so ridiculous. Stanley relished every moment that the orders came in. As though he had been The monotony. He loved the monotony. It was his purpose. Was he happy or? Did he just think he was happy? And then one day, something very peculiar happened. Something that would forever change, Stanley. He saw a titty. Something he would never quite forget. A titty. He had been at his desk for nearly an hour when he realized that not one single order had arrived on the monitor for him to follow. Uh oh, snare one. And showed up to give him instructions, call a meeting, or even say hi. Never in all his years at the company had this happened. This complete isolation. Something was very clearly wrong. Shocked, frozen solid, Stanley found himself unable to move for the longest time. But then I took control. But as he came to his wits and regained his senses, he got up from his desk and stepped out of his office. Ah, man, every sneeze was a link to my tour. That's crazy. All right, we're back in it. I can't remember what he just said. 427, here we go, baby. Here we go. What does that say?  Who am I, Garfield? Wow. Beautiful day out today, huh? Be my Valentine. Remember, oh dude. Stanley went around touching every little thing in the office, but it didn't make a single difference. No, did it advance the story in any way. So if you don't know the Stanley parable, the narrator, it's very, very, very meta. So the narrator is going to start saying things like, it's not advancing the story and being very obvious. It's an extremely clever game. Where am I going? The meeting room? When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left. We'll follow the rules for now. Follow the rules for now.  Oh, the meeting room. There's not a single person here either. Tips for not getting fired. Feeling a wave of disbelief, Stanley decided to go after his boss's office, hoping he might find an answer there. What do people want? Things, money, more money. Things but with money to buy more things. Graphs, graphs about things and money. We have our new product. It's just graphs, buy quarterly post-review review. We need reviews. Less reviews. 402 plus 405. Want to get rid of the death sport portion in the primary review schedule.  More water coolers, more water cooler heaters. Charts need to be more hip to appeal to teenage demographics. Find teenagers to put in teenage demographic. Big net, some sort of child trap. A lot of percent. Teenagers, size of demographic. Space between the teenagers. It's so good. Ooh, please, no more charts. I'm begging. The boss appreciation minute. On your boss appreciation minute worksheet. Circle the top 20 things you love most about your boss. Fill out in triplicate and return. OK. Let's go to the boss's room. Synergize, core value expenditures. Shift global market paradigm. Monetize free to play.   Whoa. Stanley stepped into the broom closet. But there was nothing here. So he turned around and got back on track. To your eyes, there's nothing here.  There was nothing here. Hell yeah. No choice to make, no path to follow. Just coming to a staircase. Stanley walked upstairs to his boss's office. OK. Whoa. Executive bathroom, huh? Wow. To be rich isn't a crime. To commit crimes. Isn't it rich? What a life it would be to have to pick just one. What a life it would be if I could read. Extreme bathrooms. Bath by testifies on the trial of the century. Tired of getting ash on your porcelain? Faucet pipes. I love how every time you click, it sounds like a keyboard. Achievement unlocked. You can't jump. Is this the boss's room? Stepping into his manager's office, Stanley was once again stunned to discover not an indication of any human life. Shocked, unraveled, Stanley wandered in disbelief who orchestrated this. What dark secret was being held from him? What he could not have known was that the keypad behind the boss's desk guarded the terrible truth that his boss had been keeping from him. And so the boss had assigned it an extra secret pin number, 2845. But of course, Stanley couldn't possibly have known yet incredibly by simply pushing random buttons on the keys. Stanley happened to input the correct code by sheer love. Amazing. He stepped into the newly opened passageway. Shit, yeah. Also, I don't remember a lot from the Stanley parable because it was such a long time ago that I played it. I remember certain little things, but overall, I don't really remember much because when I played it such a long time ago, and I think it was like 15 when I played it, do I just go down? Rup-ro-raki. A loading screen. Descending deeper into the building, Stanley realized he felt a bit peculiar. It was a stirring of emotion in his chest, as though he felt more free to think for himself, to question the nature of his job. How did he feel this now? We're becoming sentient. It had never occurred to him. This question would not go unanswered for long. Let's continue. Stanley walked straight ahead through the large door that read Mind Control Facility. But there's an escape. But there's an escape. OK, we'll play. We'll play your games for now. Oh, it's like Cerebro. The lights rose on an enormous room packed with television screens. Television screens. What horrible secret did this place hold, Stanley thought to himself?  Did he have the strength to find out? Do I have the strength to find out? I can't even jump. How am I going to have the strength to do anything? My legs are worthless. OK, ooh. Now the monitors jump to the light where true nature revealed. Each bore the number of an employee in the building. Stanley's coworkers, the lives of so many individuals reduced to images on a screen. But none of them are here. One of them eternally monitored in this place where freedom meant nothing. Where's 427? There I am. CCTV. Where is everybody? This mind control facility, it was too horrible to believe it couldn't be true. Had Stanley really been under someone's control all this time? Was this the only reason he was happy with his boring job? That his emotions had been manipulated to accept it blindly? Damn. No. He refused to believe it. He couldn't accept it. I can't accept this. In someone else's control, never. It was unthinkable. Wasn't it? Was it even possible?  Stanley, have you ever even seen the outside world? Have you ever seen a bird? The heart of the operation. Controls labeled with emotions happy or sad or content. Walking, eating, working. All of it monitored and commanded from this very place.  Hell yeah, gamer. Would dismantle the controls once and for all. Let's do it, Stanley. Mind control's either weighting input. Let's destroy it all from the inside out. System power. Turn the power off. Yeah. Stanley, look at us. But hold on. Is there a game anymore? Is there a game? Is there even a game? Blackness and a rising chill of uncertainty. Was it over? Was it? Is this heaven? He had won. He had defeated the machine. Unshackled himself from someone else's command. Freedom was mere moments away. I am going to learn to jump. Stanley reflected on how many puzzles still lay unsold. When had his coworkers gone? Where have we gone? How had he been freed from the machine's grasp? A cloud. What other mysteries did this strange building hold? But as sunlight streamed into the chamber, he realized none of this mattered to him. For it was not knowledge or even power that he had been seeking. But happiness, perhaps his goal, had not been to understand but to let go. No longer would anyone tell him where to go, what to do, or how to feel. Whatever life he lives, it will be his. And that was all he needed to know. Stanley? It was perhaps the only thing worth knowing. Stanley stepped through the open door. Stanley? We're going to find you a big titty goth girl. Let's go. Stanley felt the cool breeze upon his skin, the feeling of liberation, the immense possibility of the new path before him. This was exactly the way, right now, that things were meant to happen. And Stanley was happy. And guys, that's the Stanley Parable. That's the whole game. There's nothing more to it. Thank you guys so much for watching. I appreciate it. So obviously, that's just if you play the game by following every single instruction. That's it. But there's so much more. See, now we're back at the beginning. Stanley decided to go to the meeting room. Perhaps he had simply missed a memo. Perhaps? Perhaps. So now I wanted to just go through that once, obviously, show you what it was if you hadn't seen it before. And now we're going to do whatever. And wherever we want to go. So many things we can do. See, I want to go in here. I want to go in here. Sales this quarter. If I do it enough times. When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left. Not this time! This was not the correct way to the meeting room. And Stanley knew it perfectly well. Perhaps he wanted to stop by the employee lounge first, just to admire it. Let's see what the employee lounge has to offer. 4B9. Interesting. Interesting. Interesting. I love all of the art. It's just like random nature. Yes, truly a room worth admiring. Yes. It had really been worth the detour after all. Just to spend a few moments here in this immaculate, beautifully constructed room. Look at the architecture. Stanley simply stood here, drinking it all in. Drinking it all in. All right, let's see if we can find something. Let's see if we can get something. Coffee. Yes. Really, really worth it being here in the room. A room so utterly captivating that even though all your coworkers have mysteriously vanished, here you sit looking at these chairs and some paintings. Beautiful art. Beautiful. All right. But eager to get back to business, Stanley took the first open door on his left. Yes, but what if there was another possibility? What if instead we went straight? Stanley was so bad at following directions, it's incredibly wasn't five years ago. Yes, but now I'm sentient. Do not lie.  Don't lie. Lie. Anything here? Ooh, a key card. I need a key card, don't I? Do not jump from the cargo lift while it's in motion. We'll cause death. Penalty for misuse of cargo lift, $1,000. Penalty for jumping off of the cargo lift, $5,000. Well, what if we just? Look, Stanley, I think perhaps we but in his eagerness to prove that he is in control of the story and no one gets to tell him what to do. Stanley left from the platform and plunged to his death. Hell yeah. Good job, Stanley. Everyone thinks you are very powerful. I am very powerful, and I am control of my own destiny. OK, so we actually do die. OK, I'm going to go back to where we just were. OK, here we go. Back to here. We won't jump this time. Look, Stanley, I think perhaps we've gotten off on the wrong foot here. Who are you? I'm not your enemy, really. I'm not. Well, who are you? Yes, in your trust in someone else can be difficult. But the fact is that the story has been about nothing but you all this time. Is someone you've been neglecting, Stanley? Someone you've forgotten about? Please, stop trying to make every decision by yourself. Now, I'm not asking for me. I'm asking for her. For her? This is it, Stanley. Your chance to redeem yourself, to put your work aside, to let her back into your life. Who is she? She's been waiting. Who is she? Whomst? Let's see, what do we have here? Urgent, employees should never under any circumstances attempt to move. All right, what do we have in here? Who is she? Tell me who she is. I wish I could slightly zoom in with my vision and go. Put some little glasses on me.  That's her, Stanley. You need to be the one to do this, to reach out to her. If you can truly place your faith in another, then pick up the phone. OK, I'm going to do it. I'm going to pick up the phone. Hello? Sweetie, sorry to keep you waiting. I'm just pulling the bread out of the oven. The bread? Oh, right.   I thought that maybe it would be possible.  I'm trying to make a point here, Stanley. I'm trying to get you to see something. Come inside. Let me show you what's really going on here. She just slides back. This is a very sad story about the death of a man named Stanley. Death? Good morning. Press G on your keyboard. Stanley is quite a boring fellow. He has a job that demands nothing of him. And every button that he pushes is a reminder of the inconsequential nature of his existence. Press U. Look at him there, pushing buttons, doing exactly what he's told to do. Now he's pushing a button. Now he's eating lunch. I'm not eating lunch. Now he's going home. Now he's coming back to work. One might even feel sorry for him, except that he's chosen this life. It's time to undo. I'm not going to press O. I'm not going to. I'm just going to sit back, relax, and not press O. I don't have to press O. I don't have to press anything. Should I press a different letter? What if I pressed F or R? Is there anything else in here that I could do? What, P or I? L, M, N. Can I open the fridge? OK, I'll press O. But in his mind are. In his mind, he can go on fantastic adventures. From behind his desk, Stanley dreamed of wild expeditions into the unknown. Fantastic discoveries of new lands. It was wonderful, and each day that he returned to work was a reminder that none of it would ever happen to him. Press U to watch TV. And so he began to fantasize about his own job. At first, he imagined that one day while at work, he stepped up from his desk to realize that all of his coworkers, his boss, everyone in the building had suddenly vanished off the face of the earth. The thought excited him terribly. Press V to spend time with the boys? The boys! It's boys fine, baby. He imagined that he came to two open doors and that he could go through either. And last, choice. Choice. It barely even mattered what lay behind each door. Yes, as long as my boys are on the other end. That his decisions would mean something was almost too wonderful to be heard. Some boys and some bruise. Press F to prepare dinner. As he wandered through this fantasy world, he began to fill it with many possible paths and destinations. Down one path lay an enormous round room with monitors and mind controls. And down another was a yellow line that weaved in many directions. A yellow line to him. And he called it the Stanley Parable. Oh. Press M to tell your kids a story. It was such a wonderful fantasy. And so in his head, he relived it again and then again and again over and over, wishing beyond hope that it would never end. That he might always feel this free. Well, I don't really feel free right now. There's an answer down some new path, mustn't it be? Perhaps if he played just one more time. Press R to tell your wife you love her. Linda, after all these years, I never thought that I would meet somebody like you, Linda. Someone so loving, caring, and someone who just wanted to laugh with me. Someone who you could just talk to. And you know, Linda, you have become so important to me. I love your smile. I love your laugh. I love, you know, you're so beautiful. Everything about you is so colorful inside and out. And I just can't imagine living my life without you because you bring so much to it. So Linda, I just want to let you know that I love you. But there is an answer. How could there possibly be? In reality, all he's doing is pushing the same buttons he always has. Nothing has changed. The longer he spends here, the more invested he gets. The more he forgets which life is the real one. Which is the real life? Which is the fake life? You know, I press I to go to sleep. And I'm trying to tell him this, that in this world, he can never be anything but an observer. That as long as he remains here, he's slowly killing himself. But he won't listen to me. He won't stop. Here, watch this. Stanley, the next time the screen asks you to push a button, do not do it. OK. But how long? I'm just going to press it. Can he just not hear me? How can I tell him in a way that he'll understand that every second he remains here, he's electing to kill himself? How can I get him to see what I see? How can I make him look at himself? Press you to question nothing. I suppose I can't. Not in the way I want him to. But I don't make the rules. I simply play to my intended purpose the same as Stanley. We're not so different, I suppose. Not so different after all? I'll try once more to convey all this to him. I'm compelled to. I must. Your voice is so soothing, sir. Well, maybe this time you'll see. Maybe this time. And I tried again. And Stanley pushed a button. And I tried again. And Stanley pushed a button. Please die. And I tried. Does it just kill you? All right, we're back at the start. What could it mean? Stanley decided to go to the meeting room. Perhaps he had simply missed a memo. New content. New content. Guys, I love content. Oh, new content? What does that mean, new content? I don't know. What lies beyond? It's a Disney ride. Yes, yes, yes. Bring me Mickey. It's a little ride along. Thank the Stanley parable, Ultra Deluxe. As you may know, the Stanley Parable was released in 2013 on home computers. Wow. After receiving critical and commercial success, it was expanded upon in 2022 with the Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe, a reimagining of the game for consoles and home computers. The Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe features exciting new content that broadens and expands the world of the Stanley Parable. The lighting audience is the world over. Step inside and see what thrilling new adventures await in the Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe. Wow. This sounds delightful. That was delightful. I'm very excited to see the thrilling new Ultra Deluxe content. Me too. OK, so far it's an elephant. Nothing special yet, but I'm sure it's just the beginning of a mesmerizing adventure. I'm sure it is. Can we? Is it broken? Can we go? What's going on here? Should we be moving somewhere? Oh, there we go. Move it up. At long last, it's on to the new content. I've never been more ready. I love new content, baby. So, Mr. Man with a Voice. I have to say, initial impressions of Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe, mislitevious. Yeah. Oh, OK. Let's see the content. Give me the content, Stanley. Give me the content, Stanley. Let's go. I love content. It's what? All right. All right. Let's see. It's the jump circle. I can't jump outside of the circle. Look at this, guys. I can jump. That's incredible. I want to save some jumps. What if there's places that I can jump in the future? I don't want to run out of all my jumps. 24 is my favorite number. I'm going to leave it at 24. OK. I'm going to say that maybe. Is that it? I can jump in the future. Surely that's not all the new content. There has to be something else, right? Maybe. Could there be a crouch? Square? Initial impressions of this game are not positive. It's just elevators and jumping. Is this what passes for exciting new content? Basically. And I could just redo the whole dictionary. There's 20 hours of new content right there. I could counter 30 trillion. You could put that on the box. The Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe now with over 1,000 hours of new content. Oh, wait. There's more. Very good. Yes. I knew there had to be something else. Let's see it. I'm ready for whatever it is. OK, what is it going to be? Thank you for enjoying the new content. That's it? Oh, you've got to be kidding me. You see, Stanley? This is what happens when greedy video game developers with no respect for their fan base rush a cheap expansion to market for no reason other than to make an easy dollar. And don't get me started on the level of craftsmanship that's gone into it. In fact, I'm looking right now at the game's achievements. And it's hard to believe one of them actually says, test achievement, please ignore. What quality assurance department signed off on this? I'm infuriated and I'm offended. And I intend to find these people on Twitter and hold them personally accountable. It's my fault, Stanley. I built up too much anticipation around the new content, I'm afraid. They could never have lived up to such expectations. If you're still with me, why don't we just reset the game? Oh, but I like the new content. I'm going to try to get back to what the Stanley parable is really about. No frills, no gimmicks. Just you and me having a great time together like always. But I like the new. What do you say, friend? I like the new content. Oh, I don't have a choice. Okay. Oh, but this is different. This is very different. Well, oh, wait. Stanley, come over here. I can crouch. In the vent. I want to show you something. I can crouch. He and I are on the same team now, I feel like. Coffee nut. He took them. And I have a limited of them. Okay, you remember how cheap and unsatisfying the new ultra deluxe content turned out to be? Yeah, I remember. What it could be thinking about the past and how much better the Stanley parable used to be. So I made something special and tucked it away here where the game's developers won't find it. It's Elden Ring. Just our little secret. What if it literally was Elden Ring? Wow.  It's where I've been storing all my favorite memories so I can relive the peak experiences of my life whenever I want. This is amazing. Experiences like the launch of the Stanley parable on PC. This is incredible. You see, Stanley, doesn't the memory zone remind you of how wonderful Stanley parable was before it was solid with a cheap re-release? Remember back in October of 2013 when the game originally launched? Back then, video games had integrity. Back then, it owned never something. That's really funny. Zone, sweet zone. What else do we have here? Ah, steam. Is this the day it was launched? That's really cool. Can't go in there. Damn. Our first kiss, my first car. The release of Stanley parable in 2013. Oh. The memory zone. 2013. Ah, yes. Ah, yes. Pull up some footage of me playing the pit Stanley parable in 2013. Just a little bit. Wow, wasn't that nice? I remember 2013 fondly. Ah, they were using Firefox. Good times. Good times. A trip down memory lane. Smile because it happened. The first dollar. Wow. The demo of it. That's cool. Go outside. Don't play for five years. Unachievable. It's impossible to get this achievement. Work in progress. This is so nice. The creator is surprisingly down to earth. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Can we sit on this bench? Just sweet all out. And over here is where I keep reviews of the Stanley parable. Like this stunning triumph of games journalism. 10 out of 10 from destructoid.com. James Stephanie Sterling writes, and I quote, we're so many games that aspire to be more than games end up less than any form of art. Stanley parable strives and then succeeds to be every game ever created. Did you hear that, Stanley? Every game ever created. That's how grand and all-encompassing the original Stanley parable was. Pretty cool. It was literally every game ever created. It was Skyrim, it was Persona 3, it was all of them. And now it's nothing. It's no games at all. It isn't even the Stanley parable anymore. It's just a husk now. A lifeless husk with an hour of new elevator content. But it's so original. It's just a photo of Minecraft. It was good. Person of the year. There he is. Greatest wealth is memory. Can't go down there anymore. I was going to go back and go downstairs. Here's another moving passage, this time from gamespot.com. The Stanley parable is both a richly stimulating commentary on the nature of choice in games and one that offers some of the most enjoyable, surprising, and rewarding choices I've ever been confronted within a game, nine out of 10. Don't you get it, Stanley? The game was perfect. Well, nine out of 10 isn't perfect. It didn't need new content. It just needed to be left alone to spend the rest of time collecting dust in the hallowed hall of beloved video game memories. But how could I, the serious room? I can't get there. The boxes are in the way. These were simpler times, Stanley. But I wouldn't give to go back to have it all over again. Wait. Hang on. I don't recall this part of the memory zone before. Oh, no. What's this? What's down here? These are bad memories. Oh, no. God, no. Bad reviews. Stanley, it's a collection of reviews from Steam, the online video game distributor. No! Oh, no. We've got to go back. We've got to go back.  This is going to be awful. No, no, no, no, no. Honestly, I could not be bothered to play this game to full completion. The narrator is obnoxious and unfun... ...with his humor and dialogue proving to be more irritating than entertaining. I'm not trying to be funny. I'm trying to make a serious work of art. This is what YouTube comments are like. ...to insert into the Stanley parable. But the game is already such a densely-laid web of profound philosophical insights that I can't even imagine where I'd have the room to stick them in. It's miserable out here. MISERABLE! There's going to be so many porn bots in the comments making the same actual, genuine comment that one person made in just regurgitating it over and over and over with the name of Clictop. I don't think you're preachy, narrator. I don't think you're preachy. To be honest, I had always thought of the game's dialogue as being rather terse to begin with. You can't know how much fluff I kept from the game to get it to feel as light and airy as it... Well, I thought you did. But maybe it wasn't. Dear, what an awful memory to have to hold on to. These black marks are my otherwise unimpeachable track record. I feel... like a failure. Like I let these people down. The Stanley Parable isn't quite as sterling as I always remembered. What's this one got to say? You constantly have to stop doing anything so the narrator can catch up with his long-winded explanations of what's happening. I wish there was a skip button. New content. Skip button. Well, well, yes. Yes, I think we can do that. If I'm truly too preachy then, then maybe letting you skip ahead for just a moment probably it couldn't hurt. Not if it means we can strike these negative reviews from the record. Only positive reviews of the Stanley Parable. Something's happening. And it's always been my motto. I do anything for the customer Stanley. Yes, a skip button we shall have. You don't have to do that. You don't have to conform to what the assholes are saying. I don't want to press it.  Go ahead and give it a shot. Forward in time so that the second mind-sesson droning starts to bore you with just the push of a button you'll have zipped right past it. I don't want to. It's what the players have been asking for. It's not what I was asking for. No. No more listening to me rambling on and on and on. No, no, no, no. I don't want to do it. The Stanley Parable is a game for the people. I'm not people. And if the people on silence, then by goodness, that's what they're going to get. I don't want it.   I don't want to. I don't want to. I want to hear what you have to say. I don't want to. I don't want to. Does he just go on forever? I didn't want to. I don't want to. Is it trying to get me to skip again? Well, that's what you really did. It's funny, but that's the power of the button. The minute I start to go off on a thoughtless display of self-absorption, it's right at your fingertips to go. And it's all over. Oh, I can't wait to see what cookie nine will say about this. And whether they'll edit the rating of their steam review, or at least change some of the wording, perhaps to be honest, I don't even know if one can change their review in the first place. I have no idea. I guess I should become better educated on exactly how steam works. Perhaps that would have been the smart thing to check on before I went about this whole exercise of making the skip button. Although I have to imagine that after seeing this exciting new technology... Okay. Okay, welcome back, Sammy. Now, I should say that the amount of time the button has been skipping through is becoming longer and longer. That the last one was, well, I want to say maybe 30, 45 minutes. 45 minutes? 5 minutes. Stanley, Stanley, Stanley, please don't push the button again. It's been 12 hours. You've just been frozen there. I don't know why the skips are getting longer, but they're really truly getting... Oh, Stanley, you're back. You're back. Oh, my goodness. I have someone to talk to again. Stanley, I think it's been a week. The plant's dead. I've been sitting here all that time. Just sitting here, not a single person to speak with. And you'd think that that's just how it's always been, right? Me talking and you saying nothing. Damn. Would you think that it's exactly the same as always? Doesn't that feel like what we've already been doing? How long? Oh, hello. It's you. You're here again. Welcome. I have had time to think about you and about us and about everything we've been through. I've had so much time. I stopped keeping track after a year. Have you ever sat down in one place and not moved for one entire year? Let me describe it for you. To begin with, there is... Is he dead? Oh, no. Is he dead? Is the clock still working? The clock's dead. The only thing I have left is his button. I skipped through all my time. I want it back! Turn it upside down. Make it a rewind button. It's out of battery.  But they didn't understand the game was never meant to be funny. It was meant to have a point. He's back! It was meant to speak to the human condition. But where are the jokes? Where are the jokes? They bemoaned this screen. They gnashed their teeth and said, entertain us. It wasn't enough.  But then, he's talking too much. They said, first, he didn't entertain us.  It's the inconsistency. It's the lack of accountability. It's the unwillingness to examine with an uncompromising heart. Is he gonna notice that I'm back? The words that they are speaking into the world. As though there were no consequences. Is this this forever? Is it this forever? The end is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. Is never the end. There's a leak. There's a leak in the roof. Can I get back there? Is there anything I can go back to? Can I go anywhere? There's no doors or anything. Just the skip button forever. Would you skip on me? Would you skip me? The roof caved in but maybe this is the only way we can escape Sunlight finally sunlight There's a fly. This is so weird And amazing nature's healing gamers Nature's healing after the steam reviews How long have we been skipping for? Everything's dead again. Oh the ashes of my Leafy friends. I don't like this place. I want to skip again Get me out of here. Does this work still skip button?  I'm gonna see if I can go back and skip. I don't think I can all right friends I'm going to end this here for now. I'm definitely going to record more of this because I want to see How much more the game has to offer I think so much more but goddamn it's so clever and it's so self-aware It's really refreshing. I don't know That's awesome. I will leave in the description down below a Link to my original playthrough of the Stanley terrible which I hope is up because that would have been on the old crank gameplay So I hope that's there so you can go and watch that Leave me negative reviews on that video But uh that goddamn that's so good I can't wait to play more of that and more will definitely be coming soon So thank you guys so much for watching Hope you enjoyed if you did make sure to slap that like button right in the face and I will see you guys in the next video Love you all stay cranky. Bye