Hello, welcome to this segment of Tech Tips for Teachers. And in this segment, we are going to be looking at how to use tabbed browsing, otherwise known as toggling between screens in a course. So here we are in the idea home page. I'm gonna go ahead and start going to start here. And we have now opened into a list of modules. And if I was working in my course and I only wanted to go and open a new page, for example, I wanted to find out how to set up a grade book, which is something that this course will cover later. But I don't want to leave the page where I am right now. And I wanted to make sure I could come back to it. I can come up to the item and then I can right click either on my mouse or on my trackpad. And I can point to open link in a new tab and just click that link. You can see up here that it's loading. And in just one second, we will be able to see the page. And here's that information that I had before. And so now I'm over here in this tab and I want to go back to where I was. And if I'm all done with it, if I get done with it, I can close it. Or I can just leave it open like this and click back to where I was. And there's where I started. I'm gonna close this little arrow because I'm done with it. And the thing you could do is to do the same thing if you were in the modules. And for example, you wanted to look at your grades for your course. Right click and open link in a new tab. And right up here in a new tab takes a moment sometimes. You can see here that this is the test student. And right now our test student does not have any scores in the grade book, but here the test student could look at their grades. And then when they are all done, just close that tab and come back over here to the course modules tab. So that's really easy to toggle within the screens. And that does not matter if you're doing an internal link within Canvas or an external link. Here's a link that's external link to a Google Drive. You know that by this little chain link here. And I can just come down and right click on it. Open link in a new tab. And that link to my Google Drive will pop right on up. Maybe sad. Don't worry about the sad face right there. Just click on the top. And it will load. It just does not give a preview. All right, so now we are moved over here into the Google Drive. We'll learn more about the Google Drive and Canvas and the relationship between the two of them and a little bit later on. But today we're just focusing on being able to move effectively between one tab and moving over to another tab. And this is a very convenient way to be able to look at lots of different pieces of information at the same time without having to go back or to re-log into anything. And one tip though is when you're done with it, just if you're done completely, you just close it. And that keeps things a little cleaner and easier for navigation. This same thing with toggling between tabs and using tab browsing is something that you'll need to make sure that you teach your students so they can also navigate effectively in idea. All right, I hope this segment on toggling and tab browsing has been helpful for you and will help you be able to navigate more effectively during this idea training course.


I'll be forced to bet on the Colts because it's a weak one and I'm a Colts fan. They are favored by seven and a half. That is the largest spread of week one over the Houston Texans with Dougie Mills. But a lot of that is because of how good the team is around Matt Ryan. That defense is unbelievable. If they play adding Gilly walk to the island, Kenny Moore, the forest Buckner, Grover down there. And then you have Shaq Leonard back, maybe healthier than he's ever been now. So this team should be even better. And you think if the quarterback position is completely figured out, let's go. Let's go on a run in Indianapolis and it's great to see Shaq almost back.


I have two people till now you have given me attendance just seven views now give your attendance quickly okay four people till now I will wait for two more minutes guys and then I will start okay Varsha okay we will start people are not joining therefore so I am starting with topic statistics now what is statistics statistics is a form of science which deals with I am writing the definition form of science which deals with selection, presentation analysis and representation of the data or let's say interpretation because presentation I have already also important words in this particular definition is first of all collection, presentation, analysis and interpretation and then comes the word data now why statistics now try to understand I want to know a pattern of which math book grade 9 students across India CVSE board wanted now if I want this information to be with me what I will do is I will start collecting data and what would be that data so data would be I will go to student to other and I will start asking which math book do you prefer somebody will say Aadi Sharma somebody will say R. S. Agrawal somebody will say Piyasan publication somebody will say N. C. E. R. T. somebody will say autonomous board work so what happens is I will have some good 10-15 categories and suppose I am interviewing some good 10 lakhs people so what happens is I have 10 lakh data in front of me now I need to so collection of data this is the part of collection of data presentation of data is last actually so first I am doing analysis so my analysis would be that I will categorize data into different categories so I will say out of 10 lakhs 2 lakhs read Aadi Sharma 2 lakhs read R. S. Agrawal 1.8 lakhs read Piyasan and likewise I will do the filtering of data and then I will make a chart so interpretation of the data is that the most number of people are studying either Aadi Sharma or R. S. Agrawal 40% people are studying Aadi Sharma and R. S. Agrawal very less people are studying autonomous board book and all those things so having said that I will have then presentation of data and the presentation of data will say me that see here I made a bar graph which is of 2 lakhs for R. S. Agrawal similarly I make a bar graph which is again 2 lakhs which is for Aadi Sharma this is 1.8 lakhs for Piyasan and likewise so statistics is gathering data from somewhere and with that data I study that data properly put it in a certain format depending on my requirement and then try to find out behavior try to find out the habit of or try to find out try to find out characteristics which is of my liking so statistics helps us in mining statistics helps us in knowing several unknown characteristics about different surveys now another word in my discussion was data now what is data data is nothing but information or set of given facts this is what data means now as we know data now let me go to type of data so data is categorized into two parts one is primary data and one is secondary data and primary data is something data collected first hand by the investigator himself so in this kind of data one thing is important that when I am going to find out when I am doing the research work when I am doing study about something and I need some information from outside I go out try to find out that data that is what my primary data is all about now this is my secondary data and my secondary data tells me that when I have to study I look to some historical data so this data was collected by someone and not collected at time of research it is collected by someone else so if I give a live example of this every 10 years we have census census means we calculate total population and other fundamental categories like we calculate education we calculate income and all those things is it okay so earning members of the family income is not salary we calculate members of the family whether a person is working he is employed he is not employed then we then other things so what happens every 10 years I have my census of India so this is a primary data secondary data can be that if I go to find out the you can say anything like suppose I go and I have to give a presentation about the unemployment rate in India and I go to NSSO website and I find out data from there and I just copy paste that data saying that I have taken it from NSSO so that data which I didn't collect become secondary data because this was collected by NSSO survey and I didn't use it so sorry I didn't I have nothing to do with collection and analysis of data I just find it from somewhere I quote the source that this is the source from where I am getting it and then I do my business with that so I have already explained primary and secondary data to you now let me move to raw or ungrouped data so raw or ungrouped data means data when you collect the data in original form without any analysis categorization you have to write this word that ungrouped or raw data is always in original form grouped data is it has been put in certain order when it has been put in certain order so that order can be extending order it can be categorized by name address date of birth anything so categorization of data depending on different variables is known as grouped data now there is something called array now array is specific form of grouped data that specific form is nothing about any numerical data if any data set is arranged in extending or descending order that is called array so array means you take the data put it in arranging order or you put it in descending order so you find an array now next thing is frequency of data observation and this is very important guys focus here frequency of data observation it is the number of times and observation occurs so what I do is I will take a few numbers and I am writing few numbers here 5 2 3 1 2 4 5 1 2 3 1 2 3 now first of all if I have this kind of data I know that numbers are from 1 to 5 and I have all the numbers so if somebody is asking me that what is the frequency of each observation I will make like this so remember this and what is this data all about number of children in each house so I went to 20 houses and I found out how children are there in that house so what I will do over here is I will make a frequency table how to make frequency table I am making frequency table is like this you will write number of children then you will write tally mark and then you will write frequency so as this number is going from 1 to 5 all numbers are 1 2 3 4 5 number of children are 1 tally mark is how much 1 2 3 4 5 so tally mark means see what happens I draw 4 lines like this and 1 line like this for 5 so suppose if tally mark let me explain here tally mark if any number or any number is coming once I will make 1 line if 2 numbers are coming I will make 2 lines if 3 numbers are coming I will make 3 lines if 4 numbers are coming I will make 4 lines if 5 numbers are coming I will make 4 horizontal line and 1 diagonal line so this is for 5 what about 6 I will make 1 line for 7 I will make 2 line for 8 I will make 3 line for 9 I will make 4 line and for 10 again I will make 1 line like this so this is how you have to make tally mark so this gives me frequency is equal to how much 5 so now I will remove number 1 from here I will go to number 2 so this is coming 1 2 3 4 5 6 so for 6 I will draw 4 vertical line 1 line like this and then again 1 line so this is 6 now I will go to 3 so 3 is coming 1 2 3 4 times so 3 is coming only 4 times so I will draw 4 vertical lines so I got 4 vertical lines now I will go to 4 4 is coming 1 2 3 times so for 4 I will draw 3 lines and I will write 3 here and for 5 I will write 1 on this side and 1 on this side so I have only 2 so I will make 2 vertical lines and I will write 2 here this is what my frequency table is did you guys understand just let me know in the chat box I am waiting ok Shraddha Ritu has told yes Dhruti has told yes Varsha has told yes Anchita did you understand Tanay Tanay is also saying yes good ok so let me move to few questions and then I will come to exclusive inclusive form ok so fine all of you yes so I am moving questions I am moving 2 questions so look at the second example I am doing it for you and I am directly taking example from your book R. S. Agarwal this says that the following data gives marks out of 50 obtained by 30 students of a class in a test and this is like this so let me write with a green pencil the data is like this 40 12 46 37 17 36 22 23 19 39 25 5 33 19 21 12 41 17 19 17 again 12 8 10 21 13 14 16 17 18 19 20 26 28 28 29 30 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 39 40 40 41 42 43 45 47 49 50 50 51 51 52 53 raw data is Condensed, so this is called class interval now see how I'll take class interval here So my number varies from 1 to 40. So I can take class interval of 1 to 5 then 6 to 10 then 11 to 20 Then sorry 11 to 15 because this this class size has to be equal most of the time Class size is difference between the bigger number and the smaller number. So I'm taking a class size of Five and here 16 to 20 and likewise I can take till 40 or I can take a class interval of 1 to 10 then 11 to 20 Then 21 to 30 and then 30 1 to 40 now guys look at here Look at very carefully here I am ending this class interval at 10 and I am beginning this class interval with 11 What about numbers between 10 and 11? So numbers between 10 and 11 cannot be fit in this particular class interval. So this kind of Arrangement of class interval is good for those data set Where I only get integer values. Are you understanding? So if I'm getting integers, there would be no number between 10 11 20 and 21 30 and 31 So this will do my job If I have any number such as 10.5 So I will not be able to fit it in this data So for that, I'll have to make another kind of data set which is one 10 where 10 included I can write like this that 10 is included here or 10 is not included here And then I'll make from 10 to 20. So I can write that this larger value is not included here So if any number 10 is coming, I'll write here Then I can take from 20 to 30 and then I can take from 30 to 40 Now in this kind of data class interval, what happens? There's some kind of data where I have decimal values So if 10.1 is coming, I know that this is between 10 and 20 So I'll put it here and if 9.9 is coming. I know that this is suited for this data So I'll put it here Which is not possible in this case if 10.1 is coming Where will you put this finishes at 10? This is starts at 11 So I will not be able to put decimal data So now try to understand that this kind of arrangement where I don't leave any gap between the class interval Is known as continuous form or exclusive form So this kind of let me just this is known as continuous form or Exclusive form and this kind of arrangement where there is a gap between The two class intervals is known as non-continuous or inclusive form Now one thing is important to know that wherever you are only getting Integers you can utilize any of these wherever you are only getting You are getting few decimal values also you have to utilize continuous one Wherever you you have data where only integers are there you can take this only this Both of them are fine for integer data but for non-integer data only this one is fine So now let me move to arrange arrangement of the given data into frequency table So I am taking look at here I take class interval There is no need to make tally marks here class interval And I will make it in both both the forms So first one is form So in exclusive form what happens I take from 0 to 10 10 to 20 20 to 30 And this is number of students which is frequency So try to understand let me put data here So now 0 to 10 how many values are there I am saying that 10, 20, 30 are not in here So 10 is not included here 20 is not included 30 is not included It means that if 10 is coming I will write in the second if 20 is coming I will write in the third 30 is coming I will write in the fourth So between 0 to 10 let me find out value So till now I have not got 1 this is 1, 2 I have got till now 2 After that this is the third one Then after that this is the fourth one I told 10 I will write in the second one so this is the fourth one Fifth one and sixth one so I have 6, 6 numbers So 0 to 10 I have 6 numbers Now let me go to 10 to 20 and any 10 would be included 1 I have 2 then I have 3 then I have 4 Then I have 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 So I have 11, 10 to 20 Similarly if you count 20 to 30 you will have 20 to 30 if you see you will have 1, 2, 3, 4 and 1 more 5 So this gives me 5 Now there are few numbers more than 40 also So I will have 40 to 50 also because the number is still 50 So this is 5, 30 to 40 I will have 1 here and 2 here, 3 here and 4 here So 4 numbers between 30 to 40 40 to 50 I have 1, 2, 3 and 4 So I have 4 numbers here So 40 to 50 I have 4 numbers Now what you should do is that after making this frequency table This number addition of these numbers Frequencies should add up to 30 So 6 plus 11 plus 5 plus 4 plus 4 Is 17 plus 5, 22 plus 8, 30 So I get a number 30 here Now let me make the same table in non-exclusive format Yes, non-exclusive format or inclusive format So inclusive format means now I will not have that Problem of where I should fit 10 So I write class interval here And this is from 0 to 10, 11 to 20, 21 to 30 And 31 to 40 and this is frequency The frequency is telling me that 0 to 10 So 0 to 10 what happens is here Initially I was putting 10 over here Now I will have to put 10 over here So over 6 in the previous one Here the frequency was 6 because I put the 10 over here So I will add 10 over here, frequency becomes 7 And here it was 11 in the previous case I will remove 10 from here So this becomes 10 Now what happens is here 30 was not included 1 max 30 which is here Now this will have to be included here So if I include it here This gives me 6, this gives me 4 And 40 to 50 gives me 3 So this gives me how much? 30 So this is it Solve the first question of this type from your book First question of frequency distribution from the book Have you done? Okay guys have you done? Okay fine So let me move to another topic Not another topic Let me move to another concept in this thing Now there is one concept which I didn't tell you here Is class mark is from 0 to 10 So 0 plus 10 divided by 2 is equal to 5 So here class mark would be 5 What is the class mark? Class mark is mid value of upper and lower limit Mid value of upper and lower limit And how do you find out mid value of 2 points? If first point is A and second point is B Mid value would be A plus B divided by 2 So this thing comes like that 0 to 10, 11 to 20 you can find out the mid value That's simple Now let me go to some other question So let me give you a question now So question 4 is The water tax bill in rupees of 30 houses Locality are given below So this is 144, 184, 130, 195, 132, 134, 196 114, 212, 174, 188, 210, 202, 145, 175, 154, 174, 178 166, 146, 135, 115, 120, 114, 140, 188, 176, 166, 210 and 208 So you have to construct a frequency diagram or frequency distribution table with class size 10 Just do it After you are done, just let me know in the comment box Okay, Sradha has done it Okay, I've got only one answer till now I'll wait for 2 more minutes Okay, so I've got few answers now Sradha, Ritu, Ruti and Tanay Okay, let me solve because I have to finish off other topics as well So how I approach this question It is very important when a question is discussed to know about approach Now approach of this question would be First, how many days are there? So 30 houses So total number is 30 Now, frequency size of 10 It means what? So you look at here I'll start from the lowest number What is my lowest number? If I go through this I find that 114 is my lowest number which is coming 2 times What is my highest number? So highest number in this line is 212 So any other number more than this I don't find it So it means that I'll start from 114 I'll write till 124 Then 124 to 134 Then 134 to 144 Then 144 to 154 Then 154 to 164 Then similarly 64 to 174 Then similarly 74 to 84 84 to 94 Then 94 to 204 And then 204 to 214 This is how my frequency class intervals look like Now once you have made these class intervals Now what we need to do is In your book it has been given I don't do it generally But as your book suggest You make tally marks So tally marks And then you write your frequency So once you write your frequency You will see that 100 And I'm not getting into calculating each and every number You will see that 114 to 124 If you count here There would be 4 numbers 124 to 134 There would be only 2 numbers 64 to 144 There would be 3 numbers 144 to 154 Again there would be 3 numbers 54 to 64 There is only 1 number So I'm drawing 1 here 64 to 74 There are only 2 numbers So I'm drawing 2 numbers 74 to 84 There are 5 numbers So 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 So there are 5 numbers 84 to 94 There has to be 3 numbers 94 to 204 There has to be 3 numbers And 204 to 214 There has to be 4 numbers So how much it is? This is 30 numbers That's simple So this is how you have to do it Now in this question only I'll tell you concept of cumulative frequency So what is cumulative frequency? One I have made this Frequency diagram The cumulative frequency is I have to keep on adding the adjacent number So first number there is no number So in cumulative frequency I write 4 But next number this 4 will be added to this 2 Then 6 Now this 6 will be added to next number 3, 9 Again 9 will be added to this 3 This becomes 12 12 will be added to 1 This becomes 13 15 added to 5 20 added to 3 This becomes 23 23 added to 3 This becomes 26 26 plus 4 is 30 So this is how it is So now let me go to another concept Which is Formation of Different type of graphs So I am starting with bar graph Bar graph is one of the most Or one of the simplest This thing Bar graph is nothing but It's of Uniform width Wearing height So What do I mean by height Height represents The frequency of Corresponding observations Now look at here This is mode of transport So mode of transport is car Bus Moped Then Bicycle And then I have rickshaw And then I have here number of Students travelling Through these modes So car I have 4 people Bus 27, moped 11 Bicycle 20 and rickshaw 8 Now what I do over here Is The bar graph Now look how I draw the bar graph The bar graph would be drawn like this On x axis I will put here Car Then I will put here bus Then I will put here moped Then I will put here bicycle And then I will put here rickshaw When you make this x axis Make sure that This Intervals Intervals are equidistance from each other It should not be that car you are Making here and rickshaw And bus you are making here And moped again you are making here This should be equidistant from each other Also when you are selecting Scale on y axis It has to be uniform scale So say I say that One unit on the bar chart One unit on the graph is equal To one Number here Let's say one unit is equal to two numbers here So what happens One unit is two numbers So this becomes 4 Then this becomes 6 Then this becomes 8 Then this becomes 10 12 14, 16, 18 20 22, 24 26 This is nearly 27 So car is still where If you make like this Make sure this width is of equal length So 0.5 0.5 centimeter, 1 centimeter nearly Then you will have bus Largest so this will be 27 Like this Then you will have moped 11 11 come somewhere here So moped would be somewhere like this Then you have bicycle 20 So 20 is somewhere here So bicycle would be somewhere like this 20 rickshaw would be 8 Like this So this is how you make your bar graph So once I have done the bar graph Okay from bar graph topic Solve one question Open out your RS Agarwal book Take a question from bar graph Topic and try to solve it Gruti I am saying from bar graph Bar graph topic Solve one question That's what I am saying The chapter number in my book is different From chapter number in your book The chapter number Solve one question from your bar graph book RS Agarwal So Radha has done it Most of you are saying done sir So I am moving to another topic Which is Histograms Now bar graphs if you could have seen Bar graphs the variable was Discrete What do I mean by discrete variable Discrete variable means Something which is Where numeric Values does not matter I mean there you saw Car moped all these things were Given what happens When you get Exclusive Or Sorry exclusive Or continuous Distribution So For that if I have to make A vertical graph like this I have Frequency Distribution I am writing here Distribution So I am writing marks And I am making class interval here So this is 10 to 20 This is 20 to 30 This is 30 to 40 40 to 50 50 to 60 70 70 to 80 And this is number of students So number of students is 7, 11, 9 13 16, 4, 2 So First of all let me tell you what is a histogram Histogram is a graphical Representation of frequency distribution In the form of rectangles With class intervals as Bases and the corresponding frequency As heights Now This looks like a simple definition But what I mean to say is that When there is this Exclusive class interval Then only histogram comes into picture So what I do over here Is you look at here I make Histogram like this Now you look at here The histogram will start from 10 Because between 0 to 10 There is no data So between 0 to 10 I make this kink Don't forget to make this kink kink says me that the data Or the graphical representation Doesn't start from 0 So I make this kink here After kink This is 10 and this is 20 So 10 to 20 There are 7 data So I make this data 10 to 20 Now the other number And the number of data is 11 Suppose it is here Now what I see here is This data is finishing on 20 And this data is starting on 20 So this 20 data only will be Increased to 11 And then this will be 30 Now 30 to 40 I write here So again this 30 is common between here to here So the other number Which is 9 will start from here And it will go like this 50 is 13 so 40 to 50 Will be somewhere like this 13 so this is 50 Now 50 to 16 16 So this is somewhere like this 16 So What I will do now is Now 64 So somewhere like this And 70 to 80 is 2 So this is somewhere like this So this is how you make histograms Now take one question from your book Of histogram try solving it From histogram select first question And try solving it Every time I am mentioning book I am mentioning your R. D. Sharma Sorry R. Sagarwal Every time I am mentioning A book I am mentioning R. Sagarwal So solve the question Okay 5 people have told me they are done I am waiting for others One more minute Okay so now I am not waiting anymore Let me go to another topic Which is frequency distribution Sorry frequency polygon I am sorry Another way to represent Data graphically Is to make frequency polygon And how to make frequency polygon So look at here Now one thing you should remember That frequency polygon Starts from 0 On x axis And ends at 0 On x axis So try to understand what to do then So look at here So let me write This is Let me make this is my Pocket expense And this is Number of students 0 to 5 10 5 to 10 16 10 to 15 Is 30 15 to 20 is 42 Now 20 to 25 Is 50 5 to 30 is 30 30 to 35 is 16 And 35 to 40 is 12 Now when I need to go to make Frequency polygon What I do is Look at here what I do is In frequency polygon So I See what happens frequency Is this kind of graph Where you have to plot Points with respect to certain Number it's not this In frequency polygon This complete range or class Interval will not be used Frequency polygon is a line Graph like this something like this The number is going from here to here So I make numbers like this And then I do like this And something like this Then I come from here Then I stop here something like this So frequency polygon is something like this Where any particular Number like this number 10 Number Plotted against one singular Point on x axis It would not be plotted against A class interval like in histogram What happened that Any number was plotted Against class interval This will not be case Here in frequency polygon So what did I do in this particular case One thing That I will be doing is That As I have to find out A specific point On x axis There is something Called Class mark which will be calculated So class mark As I already told you Class mark would be So rather than making this table I will make the class mark here only So Class mark would be You look at here 0 plus 5 by 2 is 2.5 5 plus 10 by 2 is 7.5 So I am calculating here Class mark And 10 plus 15 so this gives me 7.5 This will give me 17.5 This will give me 22.5 This will give me 27.5 This will give me 32.5 This will give me 37.5 As simple as that So This is it Now I make this Pocket expense So pocket expense is From range 0 to 5 I am leaving this row For now Class mark is 16 And I keep on making this Now what happens is If I have this kind of data In front of me So let me just erase it for some time And let me make frequency Polygon for you For frequency polygon what I do Is Draw this x axis Now on x axis For these points 7.5 12.5 17.5 22.5 27.5 32.5 32.5 And then I have 37.5 So on 2.5 On 2.5 I have 10 here On 7.5 I have 16 here On 12.5 I have 30 here On 17.5 I have 42 here On 22.5 I have 50 here On 32.5 Which is 16 here So it will be somewhere here 16 And on 37.5 I have 12 here So 12 would be somewhere here So what I will do is I will start my graph like this And I will start joining different points Once I join different points I get this kind of frequency polygon here Now the problem is I told that the frequency polygon always Starts from 0 and ends from 0 So what do I do in that case So what I have to do in that case Is that When I am making the class mark Class mark is starting from 2.5 Look at the Look at the class interval The class interval is of 5 So what I do here is that From 2.5 I will write So I will write class interval 1 before it And 1 after it So what happens is Before it the class interval Would be from minus 5 to 0 And after it the class interval Would be 40 to 45 Now class 5 of minus 5 And 0 is minus 2.5 And class Mark of 40 to 40 40 and 45 is 42.5 So this will start from here Which is minus And this will go Till 42.5 So as My actual Frequency polygon is this I have to start it from 0 So I will go back This class interval is of 5 5 places like this And I will go ahead 5 places Like this and I will match it with x axis This completes my frequency polygon So that is not That it follows from histogram There is nothing like follows Frequency polygon Can be made With histogram Frequency polygon can be made Separately also As I have done on the board Right now There is nothing like it It follows from histogram So take one question Now from your book and try solving it Okay 4 people have written they have done I am waiting for others Okay fine So what I do is now I teach you This will be the last topic Mean median mode I will take In Thursday's class with probability Because probability will not take more than To complete at your level So maybe half an hour more You will see what to do In class because that Would be the last class Now How to make So histogram Frequency polygon In same graph So Suppose I give A table I make a table here I am sorry So you know the heading I am removing the Heading Let me make a line over here And then I have another line here Another line here I have another line here I have Another line here What I do is I give Cost of Living here and then I have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 So 1, 3, 5 And 6 So what I do now is I have Cost of Living here This gives me Number of workers So I give you a range here This is 140 to 150 And Here 5 people are there And this is Cost of Living has been given in terms of Rupees 150 to 160 I have 10 160 to 170 I have 20 170 to 180 I have 9 180 to 190 I have 6 190 to 200 I have 2 Now what I do is I draw the Histogram first To draw the Histogram what I will do is I will plot my X axis and Y axis Now You see here the X axis Starts from 140 So I will have to make this King says me that This doesn't start from 0 So I will draw 140 to 150 and this is 5 Like this Then I have 150 to 160 Which is 10 like this 120 like this Then this is 9 Then this is Nearly 6 And this is nearly 2 So I plot it here this is 140, 150 160 170, 180 190 and this is 200 What happens over here is This is my Histogram But what about frequency polygon In the same graph So for frequency polygon I know that I need the class mark So here class mark would be 145 Here it will be 155 Here it will be 165 Here it will be 175 Here it will be 185 Then here it will be 195 So I put it here As 145 So one thing is here In between I will just have to put This is 145 So in front of 155 I put another data This is 165 I put it here This is 175 I put it here 185 I put it here and 195 I put it here And then I start matching this Something like this And once I match this data My frequency polygon is half ready And why it is not half ready Because what happens is I have to put it across On the left hand right to 0 And this is 145 The class interval is of 10 So I put it at 135 And I put it on This side on 205 Why I am taking it beyond 10 Because previous interval I told that go to previous interval It is 140 to 150 It will be 130 to 140 on this side And this will be 200 To 210 on the other side So class mark Of 130 to 140 would be 135 And class mark of 200 to 210 Would be 205 So let's go to 135 here And let's go to 205 here So this gives me 135 And this gives me 205 So This is how it is So this is how you make Solve one question of Where you have to solve frequency polygon And histogram together And then we will meet up on Thursday To take the discussion forward That would be the last class I will be finishing the syllabus And then we will move To revision Revision A few people are saying That they have done I will wait for others Why few people Five people have said they have done So let's do one thing guys Stopping here I have to finish Only mean media and more Which will take not more than half an hour I request all of you to carry Your RS Agarwal book In class on Thursday Please carry it for one class Because I will just finish it off that day And If you have any doubt Do let me know now So that I can repeat things So I am waiting for next one minute If you have doubt this let me know I will repeat that portion for you To explain you again Otherwise I will wrap up the session Just one request I am just repeating it once again That in the next class on Thursday Please carry your RS Agarwal book Tell your friends who are not attending this class That they have to carry RS Agarwal book On Thursday And let's meet Any doubt if you have Do ask me I am waiting for your doubt Now if there is no doubt I will wrap up the session Okay fine So nobody is asking me any doubt So thank you so much for joining the session Fine So see you on Thursday Bye bye


I have so many questions now I'm like thinking coming up with questions and losing it. So, um, I guess some people are listening to it right now and maybe because I'm going to put subtitles and probably some people are thinking but what is actually narcissism what narcissistic personality disorder, due to other people, what is the damages what are the damages and what are the characteristics of narcissistic personality disorder. I know you wrote about the nine characteristics but if you have five of five of them, and you could diagnose yours, not yourself but you could be dying with this narcissistic personality disorder, but I also heard that it is changing now. And this book needs to be advised that's what I heard also from you from the, from the videos. So, what are the characteristics and what actually what kind of damage they actually do to other people. Also for Lydia, I think I'm very curious about your dynamics, because you've been together for such a long time, and I've been with a narcissistic person and it was very, very difficult. And after just breaking up, I realized what, okay, I was there, I'm glad now I'm not there. I will cover the academic part and Lydia, Lydia will tell you how difficult it is to, and how long suffering she is with me. I'm a narcissist, I can't suffer. Academically, speaking from the disciplines point of view, narcissism is when you treat other people as objects. I think that's the best definition of narcissism, pathological narcissism. When you treat other people as objects, objects of gratification, instruments to obtain goals, etc. When you can't empathize with other people in the sense that you don't see them as human, they are things. You think you find them, you make them things. Now this requires several behavioral traits, for example, exploitativeness, the tendency to exploit people, a lack of empathy, I mentioned. Inability to access positive emotions, narcissists are capable only of negative emotions, such as envy or rage, anger, or, you know. And so on and so forth. So we have nine, nine such criteria described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, which is a book used in the United States, mainly for insurance purposes. And if you meet five of these nine, then you can be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder. Of course, if you stop to think of it for a minute, you will see how nonsensical it is.  But these two narcissists have nothing in common. Right. One to five and five to nine, they're not the same people. And yet they are diagnosed with the same disorder. So this led to the development of an alternative model of narcissism, which will be the diagnostic landscape in the next edition and the sixth edition of the DSM. It is already incorporated in the ICD. ICD is International Classification of Diseases. It's a book published by the World Health Organization. And it codifies all the diseases of humanity, bodily and mental. And so it's much more advanced than the DSM. Also, it's much less influenced by money. Insurance companies and pharmaceutical industries have a huge effect on the DSM, not a good one. So in the profession, we take the ICD much more seriously than the DSM, although the DSM because of America's power, media power, the DSM is much more well known. Now, the alternative model is what we call a dimensional model. It says that narcissism is a spectrum. It's a dimension. And that you could have varieties of narcissism, which are less pernicious, less problematic, more problematic, and so on and so forth. Narcissists maintain their identity or sense of identity and sense of self-worth by deriving input from other people. They are known as narcissistic supply. They are incapable of intimacy because they are not capable of perceiving other people as separate from them with their own needs and hopes and dreams and wishes and so on and so forth. They have problems with empathy. They have problems with aggression. They have problems with depression. And there are two types of narcissists. There is overt or grandiose narcissists. It's a narcissist whose self-perception and self-image is fantastic, inflated, unrealistic, not based on any real-life accomplishments. Miguel Omanayako, that's the overt grandiose narcissist. And we have another type known as covert or vulnerable or shy or fragile narcissists. The victim's victim mentality, right? Yes, that kind of narcissism. It fails to obtain supply. It's a constant failure to obtain supply. It's known as collapse. So it's a form of collapse narcissism. And consequently, he develops victim mentality. He becomes very passive aggressive. He's very cunning and scheming and manipulative. He's as disempathy, lacking in empathy as the overt or grandiose narcissist. But he often has something called pseudo-humility. He pretends to be humble, helpful, healer, saviour, rescuer. These are very dangerous types because they fake and imitate empathy. They pretend to love other people, to support them. And they actually then inflict damage. When they get close to you, when they feign intimacy, which is not there, then they inflict damage.  It's a kind of Donald Trump narcissist. In your face. That's who I am. I'm perfect. I'm amazing. I'm brilliant. I'm this. I'm that.  I'm a winner. The covert narcissist, you don't see him coming. It's like a snake in the grass. Yeah. What? I really don't like this. Most of the people are like that because they are in the past. They didn't define themselves. Why to be sneaky? What is wrong with you and with the other? What are you ashamed of? Like you left dreams and someone else lives in a fantasy land and has very easy life. What was that? Go lucky? Happy go lucky. Happy go lucky. Fake it till you make it. You know, these are the Americanism. Okay, so people in people's nature is to envy. Because we all have to compare with the other and to know more about ourselves. It's what narcissists need is narcissistic supply the others input. We also need others input. Right. We need to know. We exchange opinions. We communicate. We come up with some idea. We realize that idea. Same does the narcissist. But what is the difference that I will make it for most of us, not only I to benefit, but many other people to benefit. All the involved. Not all the narcissists. Narcissists, they see everyone as an object. It's their function to supply him with ideas. Someone else's function to give him money. Someone else's money to invest in his business. And nothing with no responsibility to get something in return. At least even thank you. They don't say they just withdraw the vanish. And when, of course, other people will also vanish. They gave part of them. Something, you know, was produced or and there were some money, you know, for everyone, but the narcissist took them all for himself. And he doesn't know what to give people with ideas with money with they live and the narcissist fails. He will lose all the money. He doesn't know. He doesn't have the brains how to use it. It is part of self destruction. What I call it the dark side. We all have the dark side. You call it shadow. I discovered later. But the point in all these narcissists and narcissism thing is that narcissists think, and they are actually convinced that they matter only. We do. We do. Okay. We do. Okay. So to, since he said this, you asked before, how can we are together when she says this that only he matters. I learned from my parents. I had an abusive mother. I'm not going to talk about it. She, she was asking, you must do this have to do this is for family is for for all of us to be more happy. Okay, so give me what do you want me to do. I will make it just to see your smile on the face to be satisfied and that but then leave me alone. This is my narcissistic pattern that I learned. So, but with that, in time, I build boundaries. She was not fair for something. Like a snake, right, trying, you know, from the other door, but you will do also this and you will do also this, but I rejected her for many things. I withdraw. I was not talking to her for years, even though I was the major. I was angry at her. I did not abandon her. I did not. I did not. I was there for still keeping her pleased, because she did have some positive things. She had some good intentions, not to me, of course, I will give, I will supply her but what she gets, she will give to others. So I sustain her image of a good mother, but she knew very well that she was not good to me. However, she heard it. And, and that's it about her. That's the same dynamic that I learned from her that I'm having with Sam.  Okay, what, what is that that you want? I agree with it. I will please you, I will do it, but I will also enjoy that. You will not, you just reject me, abandon me or, or whatever dismiss me, but I will insist that I will stay here. I will help you, but also, you will help me when I need. So it's, it's like a blackmail also, I'm not happy with that. But, but there is a relationship that it's fair. Transaction. But transactional for good for both of us. Okay, that is because of my upbringing. I was good to everyone until today I'm good with everyone. That is my, but when they close the line, when I see the, the hint of not being fair, and there is nothing I ask for favor, right. And there is nothing in return. That person is, you know, I can't trust that person anymore, I can't rely on that person anymore. And that's it. The one that bonds us is that he is honest, even brutally owned. That is, that is the real bondage. It's not the trauma bond that I had. From the trauma bond that I had, I learned something. But with him, I implement the all the knowledge that I had in the past, not only from home, but with many other people. So, it's a good feeling to live with yourself, knowing, being aware that snakes, that people provoke you for different reasons, and you should be smart to know where to engage and where whom to help. Is it for both of you? Is it for mutually beneficial? Yes, is it mutually beneficial? So I think that malignant self love is that product of me and Sam. It's our only child, but we don't know. Yeah, so there are two types of, you said, cerebral narcissists and somatic narcissists, cerebral, cerebral narcissists are very smart. I know such people here as well. And sometimes I think it's really petty sometimes because they're amazing. They really have a lot of knowledge, speak so many languages.  And it is very hard to be with a child as an adult. So I guess that's, does it apply to also somatic narcissists? Well, that's a long question. I will try to break it up. And then I would like to talk a bit about envy, shame and dissociation. These are critical features of narcissists. When the child is exposed to trauma and abuse, the child has two options. He can merge with the abuser. This is a process known as identification, introjection, incorporation. So he can merge with the abuser. He can become one with the abuser. And this kind of child grows up to be a narcissist. The other option is to cater to the needs of the abuser, to please the abuser. This kind of child becomes dependent or a people pleaser when he grows up. The child who becomes a narcissist, he, as I said, emerges of fuses with the abuser, but he's still suffering pain. He's still being punished. He's still being ignored or being violated. He needs to isolate himself from these impacts. And yet at the same time, he needs to be an abuser. So he constructs a god-like imaginary friend, a god-like imaginary friend known as the false self. And he creates the equivalent of a private religion. The false self is god-like. It's all-knowing. It's all-powerful. And it protects the child. It defends the child against the abuse of parental figures or caregivers. So when the child is beaten up or sexually molested or instrumentalized or parentified or whatever, it's not happening to the child. It's happening to the false self.  Decoy. Like it's happening not to me. It's not happening to me. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here as known as dissociation. It's happening to him, to this, to the false self.  This is human sacrifice, like in primitive religions. He sacrifices himself. He sacrifices his true self to this god. And by sacrificing himself to this god, he becomes one with this god. He becomes one. From that moment on, all that's left is the false self, this imaginary friend, this piece of fiction. It's a story. It's a narrative. It's not real. The child itself vanishes forever, can never be recovered. He's dead. Zombified, if you wish. Now, the false self is godlike. So it needs to be superior. It needs to be perfect. So the child asks itself, what am I good at? What am I good at? If I take my assets, my advantages, and leverage and develop them, invest in them, then I'm going to be perfect. Then I'm going to be superior.  I'm going to be almost perfect, actually. I'm going to be a walking, talking and psychopedia. So this is the cerebral narcissist. Other children, at all, they look good. Girls get attracted to them when they are teenagers, or boys get attracted to them when they're teenagers, and so on and so forth. And so they say, my asset, my advantage is my looks, my body. That's how I'm going to become superior. That's how I'm going to become perfect. So I'm going to exercise a lot. I'm going to lift weights. I'm going to bodybuild.   It will confirm to me that I'm perfect, that I'm superior, that I'm irresistible. So the child makes a decision very early on, between ages four and six, makes a decision. So these are my assets, and that's the only way I can become superior and perfect. And they become cerebral or somatic, but there is no time constancy. When the cerebral fails, collapses for some reason. He becomes somatic. When the somatic fails for some reason, for example, you cannot get sexual partners for some reason, or he had an accident. He's disabled. So when the somatic fails, he tries to become cerebral, which is very funny. They look like clowns. He tries to become cerebral. Then he thinks he suddenly believes that he's a genius. He's a philosopher. Psychology is this. I don't know what. And you see these, these clumps of muscles online, who suddenly become public intellectuals. Because they have failed as somatics. And so you see all these bodybuilders and all these, you know, and they are online and they, they pretend to be big intellectuals and big, but they don't have the capacity. So it's very clownish. I want to answer your question about somatic and cerebral. There's a dominant type and a recessive type, latent type. And when the dominant type fails, the other type takes over. And then, and, and flip flop. It's a flip flop situation. Separately from all this, we, I think it would be good to discuss envy, shame and dissociation. These are three critical forces in last season. When the child is abused and traumatized, the child feels helpless and very ashamed of itself. When you fail to defend yourself, when you fail to stand up to yourself, when you're bullied all the time, you feel ashamed, don't you? It's a very shaming reaction. Failing. Failing in general. Yes, she's right. Failing in general. Failing in general is shameful.  It's a massive failure. There's another failure here.   You get stuck. You get stagnated. You remain a child forever. And yes, you're right. The average mental age is about two. Wow.  You watch adults around you. And you can't reach their level. It challenges your sense of perfection. It undermines your grandiosity and false and discreet a lot of shame and vulnerability and fragility. So shame is a critical function. And narcissism is compensatory. It compensates for the shame. If you feel inside that you're weak, you will pretend to be strong.   Narcissism is totally compensatory. Now we know there was a big debate for 40 years. Now we come to accept this 100% compensatory, even in grandiose narcissism. So this is shame. Just to say, as the things in the environment change, and people are becoming anxious, they can't, they're afraid of the future. They come with very bizarre ideas, what to do, who they are.  You find out that something is wrong with you.  So it's a loop, you know, one goes into the other. Yeah, this is known as relative positioning. The second thing is envy.  You envy other people.  Envy is actually a diagnostic criteria in narcissism. It's one of the nine diagnostic criteria. Envy motivates not only covert narcissists, but also grandiose narcissists. And it is the twin of shame. This is an intolerable situation. How can you survive with constant shame and constant envy and the need to disguise them, camouflage them with behaviors and traits that are not fully yours? You know that you're acting. It's a lot of acting here. So how can you survive this situation? You forget. You simply delete. A lot of forgetting. And this is, this amnesia is known as dissociation. Narcissists have enormous memory gaps. And because they have huge memory gaps, every situation that caused them shame, every situation where they were envious. Every time they were criticized, every time someone disagreed with them, every time they thought they were being insulted. This is known as hyper vigilance. Every, so every two minutes, they have to dissociate. They end up not remembering, this remembering 80% of their life. That's why they need, they need someone next to them. Yes. That is my role to not to rely. To remember all the details of their lives. Yes. That is exhausting. And not many women can tolerate that. It's a burden. It's a burden. This is part of something known as external regulation. Like the borderline, the narcissist hands over internal processes to his intimate partner. He expects her to act as his memory, as his narcissistic supply. So she is, she becomes integrated in his mind as an external supplier. Exactly like internet service provider. So there's a history and there's a hard drive. Yes, like external high drive. It's an example. I own one. There was a seminar in London. I said, I'm here at external hard disk. This is dissociation. And that makes the situation even more unbearable. Because to justify, to explain to people the memory gaps, the narcissist creates confabulations. Confabulations are not lies. Confabulation, well, they appear to be lies. They're not lies. Confabulations are stories that make sense. The narcissist says, I forgot the last five minutes. What could have happened? What is likely to have happened? What most probably has happened? What plausibly had happened? And then he creates a story and it becomes reality for him. He bridges the memory gaps. He bridges the memory gaps with many stories that he comes to believe are reality. Even when they are contradicted by evidence. Just to sustain the false image. Continuity. Yes. And I call it reframing. So there was a situation that didn't fit you or you forgot that it happened. You remember some snippets, thoughts. And then you make your own story.  And they, well, but this happened. So you can't change the mind of a narcissist. He believes that. So this, I saw how desperate they are to be done. To stabilize themselves, identity, that they are having control. Because they know, and they are aware very much so of their dark side. They call it these dark trials. The urges that they cannot control. And it's easy for them to flip. So the narcissist, they are so predictable. When they flip. And when, and if they put you in the story. Be sure to expect to be blamed to be accused. And even to be taken to court. That they are so convinced in their narrative. It's unbelievable. Sorry to. No, no. When, when your life is 80% confabulation and 20% reality. You live in a story. And this story is known as fantasy. It's a fantasy defense. But if you inhabit. An alternative universe. It's known clinically as Paracosm. If you inhabit a Paracosm, an alternative universe which is comprised of 80% invention. Invented thing. 20% reality. Then your partner. Must join your universe.  You will not survive as a couple. There will be a lot of friction, a lot of debates, a lot of anger, a lot of your life. You're not like, no, I'm not like this. I'm like, so your partner must make the choice to join your fantasy. And this is known as a shared fantasy. There is a process called coercive snapshotting. I will not go into it. But she joins the fantasy in effect. Even if she thinks she had not joined the fantasy, even if she thinks she's embedded in reality. If she survives with the narcissist, she has joined his fantasy. Yeah. Theory. So she has to lose herself as well. Yes. Part. Part. The part of reality testing. If she has to give up on her independent view of reality on an independent gauge of reality. Now, victims mistake this. They say it's gaslight. It is not gaslight. Gaslighting is intentional, goal oriented. Consequently, it is psychopathic.  He knows that he is manipulating. The narcissist believes his fantasy. He is the fantasy. He doesn't know that he's lying to you. He firmly believes that it's all true and real.   That's the psychopath. The narcissist really believes that he will get married and have children with him because he's in the fantasy. And he doesn't remember.  But yesterday you offered me marriage. And he doesn't remember. So he would confabulate. He would say, you must have imagined it. You were drinking alone. And then you produce a recording. You produce a recording on your smartphone where he says, I'm going to marry you and we are going to have three children and you are debating the names of the children. And he would still deny it. Yeah. Yeah. He would say you took it out of context. Right. That's, that's true. Yeah. So there's some, I think there's an understanding among a lot of people, especially here because we don't have a lot of resources. I talked to a few people and then they say, ah, nurses, they are the people who deeply fall in love with themselves. They're the people who only love themselves. And this is, I think this is very wrong, according to the book, your book. Actually those are the people who have no idea how to love themselves. Therefore they didn't know how to love others. Right. So it's even much worse. They don't have a son. They can't love themselves because they are selfless. Ironically. And most of the people who are saying that they are reverting to more obvious type of narcissists, I mean the somatic one, because they want to be beautiful. Even there. Even there. There's nothing. I mean, most of these are referring to somatic narcissism is early childhood failure to develop self structures, including the ego. Narcissists don't have an ego. Yeah. They have super. They don't have an ego because they have a force. Narcissism is about the failure to develop a self. There is no self love because narcissism is a huge reservoir of shame. Yeah. Narcissism is a reaction to shame. There's self rejection, self loading, self hatred, self destructiveness. This is the exact opposite of self love. The exact opposite of self. And why they need someone to love them is actually that they are, and they are choosing empathic partners in life because they have really, they love themselves. They care about themselves. You know, a normal person and the jealousy and envy that they can't do it to themselves. They just take it as it is from the other. They consume the other. They consume. They see what the other is does. How is taking care of himself, herself in this. They copy it. So when they, you have an example of someone who loves yourself every time you want, you miss it. Whenever a narcissist will feel self destructive, self hated. Okay. They go to that source and they are joyful again, wonderful again, accepted. They belong. So they compensate with the other, with the other's emotions because they don't have the country laid to positive emotions. So many women will say that the narcissist drained them emotionally. They became dead. They died. And they call them vampires.  So these are just, you know, how people express such dynamic. And to answer your question. And this is actually where, why, what is the real reason of envious narcissists because they know they can't do it because they, they don't have emotions. That is how come they have, I will destroy the other just not to irritate me that to remind me that I am emotionless. And to answer your question. The narcissist cannot love anyone. And you also can never love a narcissist. I will explain the second part. And then I will talk about the first one. This is, this would be a big surprise to many victims. Right. When I say you can never love a narcissist. It's, it's a big surprise, but I will explain why. First of all, the narcissist is not real. There's nobody there. Absence, absence pretending to be a presence. Yeah. The narcissist does not exist. It's a void. It's a black hole. You can never love something. Never changing. And if you love the, what you think is the narcissist, what you are in love with it is an idealized image of an intimate partner that you created in your own mind. It's not the narcissist.  That's the first reason. There's an even bigger reason to seduce you and lure you and captivate you and get you addicted.  A mirror. And in the mirror, you see your idealized self. In the mirror, you're perfect. You're amazingly intelligent. You're irresistible.  You're unique. You are incredible. You're unprecedented in the mirror. What do you fall in love with? You fall in love with your idealized image in the narcissist mirror. You fall in love with yourself. Through the narcissist gaze, the narcissist provokes in you your own narcissism and you develop a narcissistic love for yourself. That's why it's addictive. The narcissist has a monopoly on this mirror. He is the only one with this mirror. So you think he's the only one with this mirror.  It's a drug. It's a drug. Actually, that's your validation. Yes.  Yes, because we all doubt that we're never good enough. How we look, how we perform. That's why we are all narcissists. Yeah, narcissistic. That is the healthy narcissism because it motivates us to change our mind and so on, so forth to regulate emotions. But of course, if you were raised in a dysfunctional family where you did not receive a lot of love, you were criticized all the time. So you develop what we call a bed object.  This kind of person is much more vulnerable, much more susceptible to the whole of mirrors effect. Yes. This kind of person, when she sees herself in the mirror, she is suddenly not ugly, not stupid, not unworthy, not inadequate, superior, amazing. She cannot resist this. That's why both of us, for example, are very attracted to narcissists. It's a mechanism of binding. That's the trauma. By the way, half of all the narcissists are women. So when I say he is a she and so on. Today they equal themselves. It's not 70 men, but now they're. So there's, I have some questions came up. So, so this mirroring. So when you spend a lot of time with the narcissistic person. I forgot the word to the term, but contagious narcissists, you become a part of, part of it. And actually, you become kind of a narcissistic, or you become the fully narcissistic, or you become a kind of narcissist, but not really. How does it work? However, however, you, you accepted by that. You accepted the shared fantasy. Yes. Okay. That's the, that's true. People who are exposed to narcissists suffer trauma. Yeah. This is not an acute trauma. The trauma known as PTSD. It's not. It's another type of trauma known as complex trauma. CPTS. Now. People with CPTSD and all everyone was exposed to narcissists, intimate partner, friend, family, neighbor, priest, doctor, medical doctor, everyone exposed to narcissists. Even by the way, sometimes within a few minutes. Sufferous trauma. It could be many, many, many trauma. Then he would just feel uncomfortable after, after meeting the narcissists, you would feel disgusted. You would feel uncomfortable. We're feeling ill at ease. You'll want to wash yourself. You will feel like you're dirty. Something bad happened here. I met some entity. It's not human. I don't know. You feel bad. And we call this ego distance. You feel ego disorder. So even a short exposure to narcissists causes trauma. And of course, very low exposure causes massive complex trauma. Now, complex trauma involves elements, psychological elements, psychological elements from borderline personality disorder. So it involves emotional dysregulation.  You're incapable of managing your emotions. They come, they come suddenly. They take over you. You freeze. This is known as startle response.  This is known as emotional dysregulation. This element is borrowed from borderline. You become narcissistic in the sense that your empathy goes down. Your ability to empathize goes down.  Your self-perception and self-image become a lot less realistic, more inflated, more grandiose. These are all narcissistic defenses. You become dissociative. You begin to forget things a lot. Deny. Or deny things, but also forget. Simply forget. So this is dissociative. What is forgetting things? Because this is really resonating with me in a way. Start to forget things. It's a narcissistic defense. It's a narcissistic defense. The narcissist renders you, converts you into a cluster B basket. You become partly borderline, partly narcissistic and partly psychopath. So you will become vengeful, for example. You become vindictive. You become violent or at least externally aggressive. You will become defiant. You will become contrumacious, rejecting authority. All these are features of complex trauma. To the point that many scholars, including the woman who coined, we invented, we discovered complex trauma to determine. Many scholars might sometimes think that we propose to consider all cluster B personality disorders as post traumatic conditions with emotional dysregulation, not as personality. So the victims then, depending on the exposure, depending on the type of narcissists, covert narcissists have much worse effect than overt. Because they create confusion, disorientation. So depending on many factors, the effects can last a few months, but it's common for the effects to last many years. Five years, six years, yeah. Okay, that's a good point. And another thing is, just with your permission, another very important thing.  This process is known as introjection. You introject the narcissist. There is a voice in your head that represents the narcissist. There's an internal object, which is the representation of the narcissist in your mind. And the narcissist uses something called entraining. And training is simply verbal abuse that keeps repeating itself over and over until you are essentially brainwashed. Yeah. And then there is this voice of the narcissist.  You're not contact. You got married, remarried, and you have six children. And you want the voice?  And the problem is this. The narcissist's voice inside your head, the narcissist is your enemy. Remember, because you broke up with him. You're now the enemy.  You want to dead. You want to finish. You want to imprison. You want to whatever.  And it collaborates with all the other enemy voices in your head. It creates a coalition.  And they would bring the coalition into objective coalition. And these voices will attack you together.  He's right about you.   Suddenly, there will be a second voice, which is essentially your mother's voice. Who will tell you, you see, I told you the same. You see, I'm right. This is the power of the narcissist. So in effect, we all have interjections. And we remember from our childhood, because we had to respond to mama's needs. What the mother will say, don't go there. Don't do this. Don't behave like this. Don't cross the street without whatever. All the people, all the people you met in your life. Significantly. Important. All the people you met and you learned something from them that helped you to create your identity. They are your interjections for life, even though they are dead. This is who you really are. So you are defined by other people. In your developing years and people that you may have met when you were experiencing mostly trauma, mostly trauma, because that is hard to overcome. So if you don't know how to self-care when you're in pain, what you should do, which narrative actually would sustain your identity, your character that you chose before, you will not feel a victim to that extent. You will be more defined as a person. So when the narcissist will come in your environment, you have to meet and you have sense for you. Already you develop sense of who you are. Then it would, when you will meet a narcissist, charming, whatever, or overt, you will ask yourself, what's wrong? These are the red flags, you know, what women are talking.   Okay, when you will meet a psychopath, you want to run. You don't need to say a word. You will feel fear, you will be afraid. And that's why Sam said you sweat and you want to take a shower after that and you are dirty. Many people experience that. And what I'm saying to my clients and counsellor for CPTSD is to go back to their own senses. And to try to experience many more other things and to reconnect them, to reframe them with the introject, the experiences that they had before. So they will, you know, like negate the positive experiences today will negate the back introjects from before. So in this way, we call it, I call it, reframing. It's a pretty good new start. And many, because you said that you feel some resonance, that's why I'm giving you this. Many people should just be, from time to time, remind themselves, okay, you are living with a narcissistic husband. You know, it is expected from him. Now everyone, what Sam said in the beginning, they have a definition, a language, right? They can define. And they will know with whom they are dealing and how to protect themselves. We all have that power because the life in us pushes us to just survive. And you will survive a narcissist as simple as that. No need to complicate things. No need to go, you know, to make a lot of drama because this border is borderline job, not normal with persons or victims. No victim says that he's suffering. He is saying, he said to you, my long, or he introduces me like long suffering wife. I don't see it as I'm suffering. I'm learning from it. I am thankful because I discover my dark side. I know what I'm made of. So who gets the best part of the cake? Let's share it. And again, it's a question of calculus. So mathematical question. If the vast majority of interjects inside your head are negative, the narcissist would have a much easier job of taking over you. And you will have a much more difficult job of getting rid of his voice in your mind because he would have many more allies inside your mind. But if you're upbringing and childhood and later life, majority of the voices inside your head are loving and caring and supportive and helpful, then the narcissist would have a much more difficult job to take over you. You will probably get rid of a narcissist much earlier and the narcissist's voice inside your mind will be silenced by the others, especially by your authentic voice. Every human being has a single voice, which is that person. Not mother, not father, not family, not friends. That person's voice is known as the authentic voice. So it depends. Narcissists who target damaged and broken women do it for a purpose. They're much easier to convert. Right, of course. Much easier to convert and much easier to over. Even after there's a breakup and, you know, it's much easier to reacquire them, to get them back. Because the voice is there. The Trojan horse is inside the mind. It's there, it's working. Okay, I have also, okay, I'll ask you three questions, I think, because before I forget. So the second grade supply or first grade supply and who really becomes first grade and who becomes second grade, first of all. And second, I read a lot on your book and listened that narcissism never heals, which is quite sad. But then now you said this contagious narcissist people can heal lots of years or a few months, which is a good news. And the third question is what is the difference, what is the difference between psychopathic person and narcissists? I think there's a difference between empathy, because I recall you talked about cold empathy. Narcissistic people have some sort of empathy called cold empathy, but psychopaths have no empathy at all. Is this true? No, I'll start with the last question. Both narcissists and psychopaths have cold empathy. The difference between narcissists and psychopaths is that psychopaths are goal oriented and could be sex, money, power, access, luxury life, whatever. The narcissist is not goal oriented. His only goal is narcissistic supply. So the narcissist is a junkie. The psychopath is an operative, functional entity that maximizes or optimizes outcomes. The narcissist is a junkie and he's after supply. So therefore, the psychopath is not dependent on other people. He is ironically not pro-social and communal as the narcissist. The narcissist depends on other people for narcissistic supply. So he must work with other people. He must please other people. He must somehow interact with other people. He suffers. He is integrated with other people. He hates other people. He holds other people in contempt because he's God-like and superior. But unfortunately, he's dependent on other people for narcissistic supply. The psychopath is not. The psychopath very often is a loner, a lone wolf. He doesn't care about other people because there's nothing they can give him except, for example, money. So he doesn't care what they think about him. He doesn't even supply either. None of this. Plus, many of the features of narcissism do not exist in psychopathy. Online, there are many self-styled experts. It's a catastrophic phenomenon. They're spreading misinformation left, right, and center. It's a disaster. And some of these experts have academic degrees. Some of them are even psychologists, but they're not experts on narcissists. So some of these so-called experts are saying that all psychopaths are narcissists. That is rank nonsense. Only a small percentage of psychopaths are also narcissists. The overwhelming majority of psychopaths are not. They're grandiose, but they're not narcissists. So no dependency on other people. And the psychological composition or landscape of narcissism is not the same like psychopaths. For example, psychopaths don't have dissociation. Don't engage in fantasies. Do not have the same kind of shared fantasy like the narcissists. The differences are huge. I would even say that psychopathy should not be a mental health issue. It should not be defined as a clinical entity. A psychopath is simply someone who refuses to play by the rules. Refuses to play by the rules and doesn't care about other people. But he recognizes, for example, that other people are external to him. Not like the narcissists. He is firmly embedded in reality. Psychopath is very grounded in reality. Narcissist is not. Psychopath couldn't care less what you think about him. Narcissist will fall apart if you don't give him supply. These are critical differences. So I think psychopathy is wrongly defined as a mental health issue. It's a social problem, not a mental health problem. And so this is what regards to your first question. In my early work, I suggested that not all supply is the same. Depends who is the source of narcissistic supply. If I get a compliment from Albert Einstein, it's not the same if I get a compliment from my neighbor, obviously. If Einstein says you're a genius or my neighbor says I'm a genius, it's not the same. It doesn't have the same impact. It doesn't last as long. So I suggested that there are grades of narcissism. I also suggested that there is fake supply. Fake supply is when you pretend to give me supply. But I realized that you are trying to play me, to gain me, to deceive me, to manipulate me. You're giving me supply to manipulate me. This is fake supply.  It means nothing to me. On the contrary, it may even insult me. So there's negative supply. Negative supply is something that looks like supply, sounds like supply, but actually causes me narcissistic injury. So there's a whole theory of supply. It's very detailed. I forgot what was the second question, which proves that I'm not a genius. Do they heal? So they never heal? Oh, healing, yeah. The victims of narcissistic abuse do not become narcissists. Everyone has narcissistic defenses. Every human being alive and many human beings dead have narcissistic defenses. So the narcissist triggers your narcissistic defenses. The narcissist also provokes psychopathic behaviors. And the narcissist dysregulates you emotionally so you look a lot like a borderline. But it doesn't mean to become a borderline or to become a narcissist or to become a psychopath. No. CPTSD is transitory and that's the difference between CPTSD and borderline personality disorder. That's why it is nonsense. Again, self-styled experts online are saying CPTSD is borderline. No, it's not. Borderline is lifelong. It ameliorates. It's mitigated in the patient's 40s. When the patient is 40, 45, borderline goes down. But it's lifelong. It starts at age 12. CPTSD is always transient. It lasts a few months, a few years in extreme cases, and then it disappears. It reverses completely. It's a very good news. It is prognosis is very good. So will narcissists ever heal? No. Narcissism is not a new fashion. You can take off your clothes. Narcissistic personality disorder is the personality. This is who the narcissist is. That's the essence of the narcissist. If you take away the narcissistic personality disorder, nothing is left behind. There's also nothing to work with with a patient that is outside the disorder. That's why the DSM says that narcissistic personality disorder is all pervasive. It permeates everything. Every emotion, every cognition, every effect, every field of functioning, every area of life, every behavior, every trait, every reaction, every everything is affected and defined by pathological narcissism. There's no way to take it away because then there would be no patient left. So narcissism cannot be healed. What can be done is to modify some abrasive and antisocial behaviors of the narcissist to teach the narcissist, to be more socially acceptable, to sublimate, to convert some things into socially acceptable behaviors and so on. Even then, it's very short-term effect. You work with the narcissist for three years and you are very happy and you become the narcissist yourself. I healed the narcissist. He now knows how to behave in society. He's not insulting people. He's not exploiting people. He's not manipulating people. He's not abusing people. Wonderful. In essence, he's no longer a narcissist. I modified all these behaviors. And if you're lucky, this lasts for six months or until the narcissist is stressed or until he thinks that you've insulted him. It's nonsense. It's simply nonsense. There's no way to change a narcissist. And victims would do well to stop with malignant optimism and what Shadow the Angel is, a narcissist on Instagram, calls pathological hope. They would do well to get rid of this. It's a take it or leave it. Take it or leave it. That's the narcissist forever. You want to take it? Take it with your eyes open.  Some are fun. Some are fun. But don't tell yourself, I'm going to transform the narcissist with my love. I'm going to heal his inner child and his wounds. This is grandiose. This is grandiose to think that you could have any impact on the narcissist where tens of thousands of scholars and therapists have failed. You think that you would be the one. This is grandiose. You can change it. So the last question, because I set my time and I can see I have 10 minutes left. I feel like we can talk more on this subject. If you agree, maybe we could talk another time. Possibly, yes. Thank you. So how do we prevent our children to become narcissists in the future? That's what you say. Okay. I had my own problems. I wanted to resolve. I went into child psychology much deeper and there was a summit of resilience. How to, what was important not to be more resilient, resilient to narcissists, resilient to psychopaths, resilient is simple. To learn, children should be encouraged to learn at all times. Their parents should be aware. Should be aware what are their expectations of the child and not to enforce them, impose them. In fact, when I face parents, I tell them, look, you are both narcissistic. We all are, but if I will know what is your narcissistic trait, I will tell you how not to express it to your child. So awareness of narcissism by both parents, defining the traits and influences on their children. So they will protect the child of pain, of emotional pain and to let the child, to encourage the child to experience more and more things by explaining at the same time what is going on there. So if this is a cup, this is a cup made of these two smallest details just for the child to get first the orientation of the environment. So to recognize the objects, to recognize the environment so they can have their self of being capable of sustaining themselves to be aware, to just get to teach the child to self-care, to be more aware of the environment. So just a second, this is the first stage between two, four, five years. The boundaries, what he mentioned, when the child after two years will start to be exposed to other, to their fears, they are going into the world. They will have to socialize so the parents should enforce, I mean, should make it, you know, more pleasurable social gaining to allow their friends with their children to come to them. They will go to them, you know, to meet, to have some times together to be more happy, to make why interesting things. As I witnessed and as I see, they take their mobiles, they put cartoons, now you see it. No, the children should be engaged in the conversation. Never mind if it is tough or not, if they will not understand and if they will ask the parent to explain, yes, the parent to be, to explain it, not to spare the child of being hurt, because this is the way how the child will experience what is hurt, will learn what is hurt. Then the mother should tell the child, this is how you will protect whenever you will see that someone, a child with a storm in the head, you don't stand, you just go, you don't ask what is his attention. You will just put yourself out of the way, of his way.   The child knows that the mother will never abandon her, him.   To show the differences. Mother's role, father's role, to teach the child in the formative years to get a sense, to develop the senses from the environment when the child will enter the second phase, when we'll start to socialize, we'll be ready to enable, we'll be enabled to make the difference what is good, what is right. So the child will have more trust, confidence. The self-esteem will be good enough. And also in this age, when they are socializing, it's very narcissistic trait, but if they are not narcissistic, they will not see what they are made of. They are very competitive. So the mother should regulate, the parents should regulate the competitiveness. That doesn't mean if the guy has some toy that they should buy to their children. They should say, but he likes it. Why would you like to have that? So there are ways of doing that, but for a child not to become narcissistic later is to teach him how to care of himself or herself. With the emotionally to enable the child to connect with others, because narcissists don't connect with anyone, because that is also part of the environment, not only the object, but also the people. And how to be fair in effect? Yes, the child should be provoked. In social media, there are fights and so on. Yes, you should fight for yourself. I will teach you how to fight. It's not like, okay, you should not fight. The parents should teach the child how to preserve what they think of them that was validated by the parents and the others until then. Parenting is complicated though by social media, the online environment. Social media were constructed around narcissistic traits. Social media encouraged shame by comparing yourself to others. Social media encouraged envy, of course, with likes and so on and so forth. Social media encouraged grandiosity. So there is a problem with exposure to the online world, which complicates parenting, even good parenting, makes it almost impossible. Suicides among young people have increased by 48% in the last decade. Wow. 48%. These are the children of the transitional generation. This number is nothing compared to the following numbers. Depression has increased by 300%. Anxiety has increased by 500% among young people. What's happening to the world? I think we have relegated the role of parenting to technology companies. Starting with television, long before internet. Long before internet mothers used to put children in front of television. That's true. The TV raises the children. Now the computer raises the children. Well, okay. So we have only two minutes because I set the timing. I think it ends, right? So thank you so much. I also have a lot of new information just talking to you, aside from the books. And I really would like to talk to both of you again. Let me know if you have time. You can also arrange, if you wish, you can arrange a public podcast. So you can invite people to a place and it can be projected on a screen. I could give a lecture, for example, something like that. And they could ask questions. The audience can ask questions. So it's done in many countries. You can just put many people in a hall, a lecture hall, and a screen and project the image on a screen. So today technology helps us to connect. Yes, that's the advantage. And thank you so much. I'm so happy it's going to end. And then let's talk again. The opening of the book is on 13 next Wednesday. And I'll send you this next week. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Thank you. A nice day there. Bye for now.


Today, May 40 here, so I'm perching on the edge of a cliff, juggling two tones, trying to dial up the right content. Here we go, sex researcher Michael Bailey talking to Alex Gashuta.  So, yeah, it's necessary. But like I said, I don't think everyone should be on this beat every day if possible. Thank you. Unlike some of the other issues we've been discussing, there is really no group who's advocating that pedophiles should be able to act on their desires, except for a small group of pedophiles themselves. Sure, you can find them and say there's nothing wrong with that, but I don't think that's even a slippery slope. Yeah.  But I think that... Looking forward to this. First, just a brief introduction. When I was in college, my roommate was a philosophy major, Arnie, and... So this is sex researcher Michael Bailey here talking about his four favorite subversive thinkers to recommend. He was very influential on my thinking. I often wanted to kill him. And it's because he was very good at challenging me, challenging my weeks up as a... And that makes people mad. And I think that that's a lot of what's going on in the culture. For us now is people getting mad because people are challenging them to think. And I think that philosophers, when they are doing the best kind of philosophy where they actually are bothering to learn about a topic and think hard about it, they can be very useful. So I'm going to recommend, and this is cheating, but four different philosophers, and I'll do it quickly. First is a guy named Michael Humer who has a sub-stack called Fake News in the U.S. A recent essay he wrote that I thought was really good. It's called Elon Musk is Better Than You, provocative title. Another one, can teaching the truth be racist also good? The Croatian philosopher, Nevin Cesarik, he is an older philosopher, I think he might be emeritus now, but he wrote a fantastic book called Making Sense of Parenthability about the IQ genetics literature. And I thought he did a great job dealing with a lot of obfuscation that both philosophers and academic experts engage in to have people avoid this topic. So I recommend his book. There's a young philosopher, I think he's really smart named Nathan Kofnes who is currently at Cambridge and we're hoping that he manages to have a career despite many attempts to cancel him and he's written about how we should study the most controversial topics and that's totally what I support. And finally, there's a guy named Alex Byrne at MIT, Alex's work has mostly been of the technical philosophy genre and I don't read much technical philosophy really, but I heard rumors that he's writing a book on gender and transgender. And I've heard rumors that it's excellent and very readable and really going to be like the best treatment of this domain. So that's it. Excellent. Yeah. Nathan Kofnes I want to have on the show hopefully soon. I'm aware of his work. Yeah. He's great. Yeah. I'm glad that you had so many good recommendations and so much insight on two and two things that we either tend to avoid or maybe we look at too intensely recently like the transsexual. Okay. That's Michael Bailey talking Alex Koshuta recommending several thinkers, one of them young Nathan Kofnes who is a professor at Cambridge University and so far resisting all attempts to cancel him.


Okay, so let's go to query, edit, query. I don't think I saved the last query. So let's come to home here and just apply any other steps that I did. I think I did some steps for Flash Fill in the last video. So Flash Fill, here we are. So here we want to talk about choosing columns. Now, one big thing, when Power Query was being developed, you could kind of highlight like this and delete. But what about if you had 100 columns? Then you need to kind of highlight 100 columns and delete. So what they invented, which was cool the first time around, was they kind of allowed you to highlight the columns and do something to other columns. So you could right-click and say something like remove other columns, or you could say unpivot other columns. So that was a very cool move. But then sometimes you actually want to remove just this guy and this guy. And another one somewhere else. So what you could do instead of doing that is you choose your columns. So under home, there's a new button here called choose columns. I'm not too sure when it was added, but choose columns. So if I go to choose columns, I can actually, are you sure you want to insert a step? No, no, no, no, let's cancel. So look at this, I'm in a very different step here. So I have to be at the last step. So I was already in a mid step. So I didn't want to insert any steps. Let's just do it properly. So I come here to choose column. I say choose column. Then you can actually choose which columns you want to keep. I can remove this. I like this guy, I like this guy, I like this guy. And this guy, no, I don't want this guy. I want this one, and I want this one, and I want that one. So you are choosing your columns. And once you've chosen, and you say okay, it's basically written the code here. It says table.select. Let's see how this looks. So look at what it's writing here. It says table.select columns, reorder column name, department name, title, leave, detail, blah, blah, blah. These are the columns you have chosen, isn't it? So that's how choose column works. Pretty simple and very useful. Right, so what's next? Let's save this. I did this on Flash Fill, right? I shouldn't have done that. I should have just given it another name. I said choose columns. All right, Flash Fill, I'm going to duplicate you. Then I'm going to call this one, choose columns. Choose columns. That's another trick, by the way, duplicating columns. And then I go back to Flash Fill and I rewind. So you can press rewind. I've deleted this, I press rewind, reorder columns, fine. So Flash Fill is fine. This is to choose columns. And then I apply all these nice queries I've done. I'm applying everything's up to date. Yes, and then what's our next trick?