I'd like to welcome everybody to today's presentation on parenting skills. In this presentation, we're going to talk about six key areas of child development. And basically, we're talking about the biopsychosocial development of children in four stages. And we're not going to do infant toddler today. We're going to start with preschool, elementary school, middle school, and high school. And then we'll identify key principles to help you deal effectively and work with or parent children. So a lot of what we're going over today is stuff that can be used in a parent education class, and you can decide based on your approach and the people that are coming to your class how heavy you want to go on theory versus practical tools. So one thing I want everybody to recognize is the fact that developmental age and chronological age may not be the same. And if you have a preemie, you are very, very familiar with this. My son was born three months early. So there was a huge lag initially in that difference between developmental and chronological age. Because, you know, when he was actually three months old, he was actually just getting out of the hospital. So we want to look at what the child is expected to be doing based on how old they really are. Because chronological age is the time from birth, and developmental age is what they're actually doing. Culture, environment, health and personality all impact developmental age. So if it's a culture that is extremely stimulating, then the child may develop a little faster in certain areas than other children. If it is an environment that is very poor in any sort of stimulation. And when I ran the mother-baby unit, we had a 15-slot, I will say, mother-baby unit. So we could have 15 moms and their children. And one of the things that I found and that I worked on changing when I took over that unit was the moms didn't know how to parent. They didn't know what to do with these kids. Some of them did, but the majority of them would take their child and they would put the infant in a swing or in a car seat in front of the television and expected to sit there all day long. There was no floor time. There was no play time. There was very little carrying and hugging and anything like that except for during feeding periods. So that environment was very empty of anything that could stimulate the child. But environments that are very stimulating where the child has things to play with, things to touch, things to see. Those are things that are going to help stimulate the child. Their health, if a child is sick early on, if they have a lot of illnesses and it can be especially children who have problems with their ears may have delays in speech. They may also have delays in walking depending on what's going on because if they're getting fluid in their ears then their balance is going to be a little bit off. You know how it is when you get an earache. So health problems can contribute to delays. Likewise, good health, you know, children that are more robust are going to be able to experience more things and personality. Some kids are just, you know, more reserved, more withdrawn. They need a little bit more time to ease into things and then some kids are wide open. So their personality is going to impact the types of experiences that they choose to engage in. So thinking back to Maslow's hierarchy, we have your biological needs. And we're going to look at each of these for each stage of development for lack of a, but we're not going to look at self actualization because a lot of adults don't even get there. But we're going to look at the rest of it. So biological needs at each stage, the child has to have their health. They have to have adequate sleep and proper nutrition. Safety, they need adequate sleep and they need to be able to not have nightmares. They need to be able to sleep, you know, not just adequately, but they need to be able to go to sleep and feel safe going to sleep. And they need to feel safe risk taking and that kind of sounds contradictory. But if we have a secure attachment and then a child is going to take more risks, I'm not talking about jumping off a building. I'm talking about introducing themselves to someone else to trying to do something, something new to going to preschool. Any of these things that are risks that are taking them out of their comfort zone, they have to know they've got a safe home base to which they can return. And then love and belonging comes along with secure attachment and unconditional positive regard and self esteem. Children need to have a sense of self worth to know that they're okay. Self efficacy that they can accomplish things and self awareness. You know, what do I need right now? And most of us can't necessarily say that we are completely mindful at any particular time. So six ways children grow physically, biological changes happen. And that can be growth spurts and children experience these when they experience them. For my for my children, for example, they would go through spurts where intellectually, maybe math would be the thing that they were doing and they were excelling at and it would seem like their language skills would fall back a little bit. And then it would swap. And it was this sort of two steps forward one step back thing all the way through early elementary school. And the pediatrician said, yeah, that's just normal development that's expected. When children are going through growth spurts, they need additional sleep, they may need additional food that they like to eat more.  So we need to be alert to biological changes and the impact that it has on this little human being. And that can affect their coordination. And somebody who has never been able to throw very well may not really notice it, but, you know, as children, especially in middle school go through these major growth spurts, they may feel self conscious they may be less coordinated, and that can affect their self esteem and their sense of self efficacy. They develop their language, they develop their ability to communicate and understand the wants and needs of themselves and others and it's up to us as parents to and clinicians to help children become mindful. In order to understand their own wants and needs they've got to be mindful they've got to be self aware of what those are psychologically children develop self esteem individuality and that sense of self efficacy. Now this is a throwback to Colberg and we're going to talk about him in a minute, but this is when children start learning to distinguish right from wrong. And as children grow, the reason something is right or wrong in their mind tends to change. Socially, children grow learning how to build productive relationships and take other perspectives and cognitively this is your throwback to PSA logic reasoning creativity object permanence and concrete versus abstract thought. Now, why do you care about all these. Well because the way we parent is or interact with a child or the interventions that we use are all going to be impacted by that child's developmental age in each one of these areas. So PSA in a nutshell we're just going to hit the highlights as they pertain to this presentation PSA talks about thinking reasoning and problem solving in the pre operational period. You know the child doesn't really have object permanence and has difficulty understanding if I put my glasses in my purse did my glasses go away or not. They're developing their capacity to understand things a little bit. And there's a lot of fantasy concrete operational which is a lot of elementary school. Children still need to see things which is why they use manipulatives so heavily when they teach math and science in elementary school. It's not because it's just more fun to do it that way. It's because cognitively children can't wrap their heads around this idea of theoretically one train leaves the station at 3pm and this other train train leaves the station at 405pm and they're both headed towards you. No, the kids are sitting there going. I don't know. But if you have two little trains and you start making the move and you're representing relatively accurately in terms of speed and stuff then they can see how the two trains might meet. Love and belonging is comes from Erickson. And if you remember his stages of psychosocial development trust versus mistrust then comes autonomy versus shame and doubt. This is your preschool age. This is where children are learning to be the masters of their own little person. They're developing the potty potty training. They are starting to dress themselves. They're probably starting to bathe themselves and they're developing this sense of independence. This is the terrible twos and the even worse threes. I don't know how to rhyme that but this is when a child is really learning that no word and trying to set boundaries and get some power and figure out what they've got control over. Industry versus inferiority. So when we're parenting and intervening at that stage, we want to make sure to empower the child within safe limits. And if we have to say no or if we have to contradict them, we have to help them understand why so they can learn from it. But a lot of times they also want structure at that point. Then industry versus inferiority is your elementary and some of middle school. This is when kids are starting to figure out what they're good at. They're starting to learn how to communicate with others and what they're good at isn't just science or math. It's also making friends and communicating and being funny and all of those things. And this helps children kind of figure out what their strengths and their skills are. And then once they've got their strengths and skills, they move on to high school when they start developing identity. They start figuring out, you know, who is it that I am? What is it that I stand for? So they take from their strengths and everything, hopefully, and pick from that in order to develop their personal identity. And any kinds of problems in these areas can cause anxiety and depression. So Colberg, Colberg's levels of moral development, level one is pre-conventional. The focus is on the self. Can I do it and not get caught? The question the person asks or the child asks is, what makes me happiest? And you'll notice there are no ages on this because Colberg said that, you know, not everybody develops into future moral stages, but this is generally what we see.  What's going to make me happy? How can I get away with it? Number two is focus on others, conforming to the will of the group and figuring out what makes others happy and gets me approval. Now, you can hear middle schools coming out right here. And authority on social order. What does society say I should do? And for a middle schooler, society is school. You know, they're not looking to the president and the laws and all that kind of stuff. They're looking to their microcosm of what is their world? What do they need to do to fit into their world? And then level three is post-conventional and it focuses on principles with the social contract and human rights, asking, do the rules need to be changed to fit the current culture? You know, do I need to advocate? Do I need to be somebody that stands up and tries to fight injustices? You see this a little bit in some high schoolers, but a lot of high schoolers stay at that conventional level where they're really seeking approval from their social circle. So let's start with preschool, biological needs, 10 to 13 hours of quality sleep.    How many of those preschoolers actually probably got a full 10 to 13 hours of sleep? You know, not a lot. The way our society is. Now, what's the problem with that? Well, sleep, regardless of age. Sleep is when your body balances out.  Sleep is when learning takes place. Sleep is when all those neurotransmitters get balanced back out. And sleep deprivation leads your body to think that it is in a state of stress.   It keeps you on alert more. So how is this going to impact a preschooler? A preschooler is going to have difficulty learning. A preschooler with who's sleep deprived is going to have difficulty developing because learning takes place during those sleep phases. So they're going to have problems putting stuff together as much. They're probably going to be more irritable. They're probably going to have more difficulty concentrating. And we know that preschoolers have the attention span of a NAT. And that's okay. Everything is new to them. So it's really exciting. But if they have difficulty paying attention, then that attention span is even smaller. We want to make sure that we emphasize the need for sleep and point out how many different ways it can help in behavior and emotional management. Exercise. 30 minutes of structured physical activity and at least 60 minutes of unstructured physical activity each day. Well, that's kind of, you know, loosey-goosey on what you consider structured and unstructured. But we want the child up and moving about 90 minutes a day for preschoolers. And so this can be recess. This can be playing after school. This can be a variety of things.  I see when I take my kids to martial arts, a lot of times their siblings are in the waiting room. And these children are just completely glued to their mobile devices, watching videos and cartoons and everything else. And so my thought is, you know, are these children getting up and moving? So we want to encourage exercise. Exercise keeps the body healthy. Exercise helps get oxygen around so people have more energy and so the body can grow. Exercise has also been found to help with stress reduction and releasing of serotonin. So it can help kids be a little bit happier. A lot of times kids, especially once they get into school, but even in preschool sometimes, they have to hold it together. They have to be on their best behavior all day long. So when they go home, they're just, they've kind of been stuffing it in all day long and holding it together. They need to cut loose. So this is a great time for that 60 minutes of unstructured physical activity. So encourage them to not just come home and get in front of the TV. And that will help a lot with behavior issues later in the evening. Now nutrition, preschoolers need about 1400 calories a day. And you might be going, oh my gosh, that's as many calories as I'm allowed in a day. Well, yes, preschoolers are growing. They need more calories because their body is growing. Their metabolism is faster. Why do I bring this up? The same reason I bring up sleep because the neurotransmitters are made from the food that we eat. So if they're not getting enough food, they're probably not getting the building blocks to make the neurotransmitters to help them concentrate, learn, be motivated, experience pleasure, all those things. Additionally, nutrition gives us the food we eat, gives us the building blocks to grow. So physical development as well as emotional stability can both be impacted by not getting enough quality nutrition. And 1400 calories, we know, are not the same across the board. You can eat 1400 calories of Oreos, which sounds really good. But it does nothing for your health. That actually is probably harmful. So we need to make sure that parents have access to resources to get good nutrition. Piaget, during this preschool period, kids need to start developing an understanding of things that are going on. So when they get in trouble, when they make a mistake, you want to use concrete examples. Number one, and ask them, you know, if the child goes and steals somebody's ball, how would you feel if Johnny had come over and stolen your ball? So that's concrete. They know what's going on inside them because they're very egocentric at this stage. They may not understand what's going on inside Johnny. So you may be able to take it to the different level after they've said, it would make me mad. Okay, if it would make you mad, then how do you think Johnny felt? I think Johnny felt mad, too. And it can help them start developing empathy. Egocentric thinking is also popular or common at this age. It's about me. So it's important to clarify what is and is not the child's doing. If you come home and you are in a God-awful mood, which happens occasionally, making sure to tell the child, you know, you're in a really bad mood today. It has nothing to do with you. I had a bad day at work or whatever you want to share with them, however much information you think is appropriate. And then let them go with that. So they understand, okay, it's not about me. And it's not my job to try to apologize or make it better. Children at this age thinking all or nothing terms, they have difficulty with sometimes, you know. So consistency is really important when parenting a preschooler and clarifying the media preschoolers. Remember, they're still having difficulty with understanding fact from fiction. Well, they also have understanding difficulty understanding whether something's ongoing or if it's reruns. So if you're watching a disaster, for example, a hurricane or, you know, the Twin Towers going down or whatever it is that the media is replaying 24-7 for weeks on end. To a preschooler, that means it's happening now and now and now and it's continuing to happen. They don't really get the concept of video replay yet. So we need to explain to them, this is something that happened two weeks ago. It's not happening anymore. You're safe right now because they can get really upset by it and traumatized by what they see because they don't understand. And they also don't understand when it's coming into their living room on the TV. If it happened in New York or Australia or wherever it happened, that means nothing to a preschooler. You know, they understand where they are right now. They don't understand how far away New York is from where they are. So we want to make sure we clarify these things for children. So in preschoolers, when parenting and using interventions, make sure to use concrete examples. You can use manipulatives too. You can also use with training. You can also use dolls if they want to act things out. Now dolls are, if you're doing any sort of trauma counseling, you probably need special training in that. But if you're just watching the child play or doing imagination activities with them, dolls can be somewhat concrete. Make sure to clarify all or nothing kind of terms for them and help them understand the difference between, you know, what happened in a television show, which is fiction and what's happening in real life and whether it's continuing to be ongoing. Preschoolers need to feel this sense of initiative. They need to feel like it's okay for them to leave and have fun at school and then come back to mom and dad. They need to feel like it's okay for them to experiment with, you know, in the dress up corner or on the playground or whatever with different things to try out their, their skills. You know, they're discovering this little body that they were born into. So it's important for us to emphasize that parents need to express unconditional positive regard. We're not always going to like the things kids do. That's just the way it is. You know, people don't always like the things we do and that's just the way it is. We make mistakes, but we're good people. So we need to remind parents to focus on the behaviors when a child does something. I love you. I don't like this behavior. And there's self-esteem needs. Encouraging parents during this period because children are going to try things. They're going to take initiative that may not go so well. So we provide them unconditional positive regard. I'm proud of you for trying and focus on and help the child remember the things that they can do. You know, maybe baseball is not for you, but you are really good at soccer. And help them, you know, start understanding that they're not going to be good at everything all the time, but that doesn't mean that they are less lovable or less important. And during this preschool phase and, you know, we all have been there, this is when children want a good deal. They want to know what's going to work in their favor and make them the happiest. So when you're reasoning with a child at this point, you know, asking them about whether it's the most socially appropriate choice to make, probably not going to go anywhere. So we want to ask them, you know, or tell them why they need to do something and what the benefit is to them. So common observations in preschool, a strong attachment to home and family. We hope if we don't see this then as clinicians or if you're a teacher, you may want to start taking a look at what might be going on there where the child is not attached. A short interest span. They're interested in cars one day and dinosaurs the next day and, you know, a lot of projects may go half finished, but they're preschoolers. You know, projects for a preschooler should probably be, you know, an hour long, not a week long. They have short attention span. It's hard for them to focus on any one thing, even stuff they're interested in for extended periods of time. They are becoming aware of themselves and their own desires.  Now they're not really sure, you know, why they can't have it. So we need to educate them about why they can't stay up until 10 o'clock at night or whatever. We need to set those boundaries.  They're imaginative and they often think that things that are inanimate like stuffed animals can come to life. And, you know, if you think of the, the velveteen rabbit, I love that story. But a lot of children have difficulty understanding that, you know, toys can't come to life at this age. They're curious. They want repetition of enjoyable activities. At this age, boys and girls readily play together. You don't have this diversion nearly as much until you get into later, later years. They're still dependent on adults for getting their needs met. They need consistency and thrive on structure. Now, some children need more structure and prefer more structure than others. But they do need somebody, a parental figure, a caregiver to set limits. You know, even if you're not providing a whole lot of structure, they need somebody to set limits and to say, you know, you need to take a bath.  Children are much less stressed if their environment is predictable. Now, that doesn't mean you have to do the same exact thing every single day, watch the same movies. No, but there needs to be a certain amount of consistency in their environment for them to feel calm. When they get to elementary school, now preschool, we talked about, you know, maybe kids are still getting their 10 to 13 hours of sleep. In elementary school, a lot of children are not getting nine to 12 hours of sleep. And it depends on the child, how much they need, but nine hours, not every child, you know, is going if that needs nine hours is always going to need nine hours. When they're going through a growth spurt, they may need 13 hours. So we want to encourage children to start paying attention to their bodies. And when they're sleepy to go to sleep, if that means they're going to sleep at seven o'clock, you know, that's okay. But we do as clinicians, we want to encourage parents as parents, we want to be aware that children at this age need this much sleep. So we need to kind of work our day and our schedule around it to make sure that they're getting that so they can learn so their body can develop and so they can feel more emotionally stable. At this age, they need 1600 to 2000 calories. That's a lot of calories, but they're growing. And you know, I put the link in here to the USDA website that recommends how many calories for each age group. So you know, I'm not just pulling it out of thin air. But we want to make sure that children are getting this amount of healthy quality food. Sometimes that can mean experimenting and exposing them to new foods and new experiences. They need to be moderately active 60 minutes a day, at least five days a week, or have at least 11,000 daily activity steps on a pedometer. Oh my gosh. When I made this presentation, I started watching how many average daily steps I get during the work week. It's nowhere near 11,000 steps. So that's encouraged me to up my goal. But children now that we do have pedometers and we do have the fitness watches, it's a lot easier for us to help encourage children. At my house, we compare our steps over at dinner each night to see how many steps my daughter always wins. It's a little competition between the family and it's something we can talk about. And if most of us haven't met our goals, then we'll go out. We live on a farm. So we'll go out after dinner and walk around the pond or do something in order to get a little bit more activity. During this age, cognitively, they still need concrete examples. So we want to use activity analysis, for example, to break activities into their component parts to help children see how, you know, when you're playing soccer, for example. And activity analysis of soccer would look at dribbling, would look at kicking, would look at defending the goal. I should have picked something I know more about. But you're breaking it down into those parts. If they are cooking, now I know that one, they need to get the recipe out. They need to get their ingredients together. They need to measure the ingredients. Yada, yada, yada. So this is an activity analysis that helps children start understanding how to go from nothing to something, you know, how to have no skills or no, none of this done to something. And this is the beginning of goal setting. Because then when they get older, you know, if they want to run for student government, okay, let's break it down into an activity analysis. What do you need to do to get enough votes? You know, how are you going to promote yourself and etc. And have them break that down. But they're starting to learn how to set goals. At this age, they have less all or none thinking in elementary school. They're focusing on a lot of different things. And they are able to focus on the sometimes. Sometimes I can get away with this. Love belonging and self esteem. At this age, they want, we want to emphasize the goodness of the child, model positive expectations. Remember to teach acceptance of failures and encourage calculated risk taking. You know, I'm thinking back to my when my kids were in elementary school, and they were just learning and experiencing so much. I mean, they'd only been on this planet for six, seven, eight years. And so so much stuff they had never even dreamt of and they wanted to go out and explore and they wanted to try new things. And this is the time that we really want to help them feel comfortable going out and take those calculated risks. We don't want them to go out and do something that we know they're going to fail miserably at. So we want to look at, you know, what might you start with? If you think that what they're proposing to do is, is too much starts, starts slower. And this is the calculated risk taking when a child learns to ride a bike. You know, first they start out with a big wheel, usually, then they start, then they go to a bike with training wheels. And then they go to a regular two wheel bike. And that's calculated risk. We know with training wheels, the chances that they're going to wipe out terribly are a lot slimmer than just with the two wheels. At this stage, children are often thinking about being good and living up to what others expect of them. So we want to encourage them to openly communicate what their feelings and thoughts are. But we need to openly communicate about our expectations and our rationale for those. The why's, why do I have to go to bed now?  Why do I have to go to school? Why do I have to learn algebra? All of those things, we need to help the child understand that there is a reason for it and how it will help them integrate and achieve the life that they want to. At this point, we want to help children identify who others are because if they're conforming to what others expect of them, who are these others that we're talking about? What influences are they paying the most attention to? Reward conformity to expectations. Now that sounds contradictory to what I've been saying of, you know, encourage them to try and encourage them to explore. Yes, but there are certain expectations that we want them to do. We want them to do their chores. We want them to do their homework. We want to reward them for when they're doing the next right thing and provide choices. Sometimes they have to do something they don't want to do. And remember from one of the other presentations a few weeks ago, you want to use the when then statement instead of if then. So instead of saying, if you get your homework done, then we can watch a movie. Say when you get your homework done, then there's no question that it's going to be done. It's just a matter of when. When you get your homework done, we will watch a movie. So when then takes away some of those options, but you do want to provide choices. So you say, when you get your homework done, we can do something you would enjoy. What do you think that would be? So that gives the child choices for things that are under their control. They don't have the choice about doing their homework. Well, they could, but we want to try to take that choice off the table because they need to in order to pass. But then we do want to give them a certain amount of control and agency over their lives. Safety needs for elementary schools. Make sure they're safe and independent in their exploration. You're not going to drop an elementary school or off at the mall and go see in three hours. That wouldn't be safe. But we do want to let them start feeling like they can leave the house and be safe. They can play outside or they can join a scouting team where or scouting troop where you're not the scout master. You know, you want to encourage them that, you know, there are safe places outside of home that you can explore and meet new people. You want to encourage cohesiveness in the environment, which promotes a feeling of confidence that the environment is predictable and things will probably work out as well as can be reasonably expected. Now, not going to work out perfect all the time. But cohesiveness in the environment means that, you know, if you take a chance, for example, and it doesn't work out. All right.  So yeah, it didn't work out perfect, but it worked out as well as could be reasonably expected.  In elementary school, the observations, they have a little bit of a longer attention span, not as long. And one of the things I see in elementary school classrooms is children having to try to pay attention for 30 or 40 minutes. And I have college students that can't pay attention for 30 or 40 minutes. So we want to make sure that we're presenting information and presenting stuff in chunks that children can handle and giving them breaks. Children at this age have difficulty managing boredom, whether that's in line at the store, in the classroom, in church, wherever. So it's important for parents to understand they need to provide positive alternatives. Do I want to always rely on the mobile device? No. But there are some really cool apps that children can use when you're in a place where they don't have other options. If they can't, like standing in the line at the grocery store, they can't whip out a coloring book and work in that. So there are some creative apps where they can learn their ABCs and their math and different things. But we do want to give them those alternatives. And that's another thing. When I was working with my children in elementary school, learning math was not their favorite thing. They found it to be rather mundane. And so there were a lot of activities and apps that were available that made it more gamified, if you will. And that helped them become more engaged in learning because it was more of a contest. If you do all these things, if you get all these problems right, then you get a prize at the end that you can, you know, do something with. And that helped them. So that was one way to help them manage their boredom. Now you can argue the downside of that, that that means they never learned to deal with boredom. And we're seeing that in the millennial generation where everything has to be gamified. But, you know, that's a parenting choice. And the question comes in, is it okay for them to be bored and learn to be centered? It is, we just need to make sure that we're taking into account everything that's going on. A little bit of boredom here and there when children are younger is not a big deal. Three or four minutes if they're standing in a grocery line. If they're standing in a grocery line that's 15 people long and you're there for 40 minutes, you know, most of us adults are bored and having difficulty managing. So you need to think about boredom for children in terms of the length of time out. And that's what I generally suggest to parents. So a five year old can probably tolerate being bored for five minutes. A two year old is probably only going to do well being bored for about two minutes. When they're two, they're usually in the stroll, in the buggy and we can make stupid faces and sing songs and that's easy. But paying attention and not getting upset with a child because they get bored quickly when developmentally they just can't do any better at that point. At this age, they're aware of others and oftentimes willing to share. They desire acceptance from peers and express themselves freely in play and art, which is awesome because this is when we can start helping them develop their emotional vocabulary. They can draw it but they may not know the words so we can help them learn words like happy and elated and curious and whatever else. They want to obey the rules so we need to explore their feelings related to nonconformity. When a child in the classroom breaks the rules, how does that make you feel? And help them start understanding their own feelings regarding people who don't do what they expect. They strongly identify with their own identified gender and so at this point they're going to start wanting to dress like the gender with which they identify. And they may seek affiliation with older siblings. Older siblings get more freedom, they get to stay up later, they get all kinds of perks from a five-year-old standpoint. So they may want to hang out with their older sibling who they may idolize too. The older sibling may not be quite as happy about this so we want to help them help the elementary school child affiliate with friends their own age but we also want to make sure that we have some sort of communication and time for them, for that child to hang out with their older sibling. Whether it's on Saturday afternoon or whatever it doesn't have to be all the time but it's going to feel like a huge rejection if your older sibling never wants to spend any time with you. Common issues in preschool and elementary regression a lot of times if there is a trauma or a change you know maybe mom gets remarried dad gets remarried there's a divorce there's a new baby in the house there's a lot of things that can encourage a child to regress to that age where they're wetting the bed where they're sucking their thumb throwing temper tantrums. Complaining and whining often goes up at this age. They figure if they can just make it feel like dragging fingernails down a blackboard long enough they'll get their own way. Temper tantrums and a sense of entitlement biting and hitting oppositional behavior they're trying to individuate a little bit at this point so they may not know how to set healthy boundaries and communicate what they need to and they may be saying no in order to try to get a reaction. They may have shyness and social anxiety sleep issues they may start splitting parents so they'll go to mom and ask if they can go over to Johnny's on Saturday and if mom says no they turn around and go to dad and say can I go to Johnny's on Saturday and if dad says yes then they are pitting the parents against one another. I had clients that used to do this in residential treatment all the time and technology is another issue. Parents arguing about how much time on technology is appropriate and children not wanting to be separated from it. So questions to ask to address these issues what is the benefit of this behavior whether it's temper tantrums or biting or being oppositional what is it getting this child because the child is going to do it if it's providing rewards are they seeking attention are they seeking limits are they trying to decompress they just don't know any other way to get rid of all this stuff that they've built up over the day or are they acting in self-interest they're doing it because it's something they want thank you very much and they're very egocentric. Does the child have the vocabulary to express what's going on regression, complaining, whining, temper tantrums, biting, oppositional behavior all of these things can happen if the child has something going on anxiety or stress or depression that they don't know how to articulate. Did something recently change so we need to look back and see did their friend move away did they get promoted to the next level in school did they change teachers is the child going through a growth spurt a lot of children will become a lot crankier when they're going through a growth spurt and you may see more whining and temper tantrums because not only is their body changing but their neurotransmitters are changing as well are either of the adults experiencing stress anger or anxiety well adults even though we don't mean to and we think we hide it really well we don't children are extraordinarily perceptive and when the adults in the household are experiencing some sort of dysphoria the children pick up on it and since they can't really identify what's going on they don't know why they're unhappy they don't know why they're stressed but they know they are they may start acting out is this behavior being modeled is there another child in the family or adult in the family that is modeling this behavior so the child thinks it's a way to get to where her needs met and how can I create a Colberg centric solution so think about the stage of moral development that the child's at are they trying to do what's best for them that it's all about me are they trying to conform to norms and and get approval from the parent you know probably one of those two at this age so how can we help them make a choice how can we help them in middle school children still need 9 to 12 hours of sleep and nutrition 1800 to 2200 calories exercise is now up in middle school to 13,000 daily activity steps on a pedometer oh my gosh cognitively they're still thinking a lot of in many cases concretely this is why they don't start teaching algebra and and high school because a lot of children are not in that formal operational place where they can think abstractly time and space can be understood and applied but not as independent concepts so they have difficulty generalizing from one thing to another at this stage we want to encourage goal development so if they want to be on the on the football team or on the cheerleading squad or whatever it is alright envision the end and then help the child work through it and say okay you want to be on on this team great that's awesome so what do you need to do to get there you need to try out okay what are they going to test you on at tryouts okay so those are the skills again you're doing that activity analysis so the child is basically working backwards to figure out what they need to do to prepare for the tryouts so they can get on the team in this stage the child needs to take calculated risks to identify strengths and needs to learn to accept weaknesses and there is so much pressure even in middle school on children and they feel like they're under a microscope that it's important to provide that unconditional positive regard with Colberg interpersonal accord and conformity is where a lot of them are still reasoning being good and living up to what others expect of them so they want to be good they want to follow the follow the rules and live up to whatever their social circle expects of them safety needs um safe independent exploration still we're looking at scouts sports teams hobbies at this age you're still not dropping them off but they may be doing more sleepovers they may be leaving home for a little bit more time than they were when they were in elementary school protect them from exposure to drugs alcohol and pornography the brain and the body are still developing the part of the brain that's responsible for impulse control doesn't even fully develop to the age of 25 so at this point they can actually do a lot more damage to their body and brain through the use of any of these than they would if they had finished growing and protect them from bullying both virtual bullying in chat rooms instagram any of those things and in real life because if they're going to school they're going to be seeing people so there's bullying but you know at this age a lot of children are plugged into one another pretty much 24 seven they want peer acceptance so they need they may need assistance figuring out how to choose peers and you know that sounds overly controlling but sometimes they just need to bounce ideas off of parents and you may not love every one of their friends and you can express you know encourage parents to express the fact that you know I'm not crazy about what that person does again separating the behavior from the child and then letting the youth choose who they're going to be friends with and they need to learn to accept individual differences recognizing that even their best friend is not going to agree with them on everything they can develop and pursue short-term goals seek status through knowledge and skills so we want to encourage exploration if their status is through their knowledge of science or their knowledge of drama well let's encourage them to really hone that knowledge and become experts in that thing that they are so interested in they're concerned with physical size and appearance and they have the beginnings of puberty which throws a lot of them into a tailspin because now hormones get in there and hormones testosterone progesterone and estrogen all impact the availability of certain neurochemicals like norepinephrine and serotonin so it impacts their mood the sphere of influence becomes peers in media parents not so smart anymore peers in media are the ones that are communicating to them so it's important for parents to remember they need to maintain open discussions and monitor internet usage including on mobile devices there are apps you can put on that your youth cannot take off unless they're really good at breaking into their computer but there are apps you can put on their mobile devices that can block them from adult content even when they're not on your home network biological needs in high school they still need 8 to 10 hours of sleep now I know when I was in high school I didn't get 8 to 10 hours I got 6 if I was lucky and nutritionally 2,000 to 2,800 calories per day they need to be moderately active 60 minutes a day or have at least 13,000 steps on their pedometer in high school they are capable of formal operational thought so they can use abstract thought and reasoning hypothetically if this were to happen what would be the outcome hypothetically if I decided to do this what would be the potential consequences and can I live with the fallout from that questioning to encourage problem solving abilities and perspective taking instead of saying that is the wrong thing to do or that is a bad choice ask the youth what do you think the consequences of this would be ask the youth to think it through instead of telling them what your opinion or your thoughts are right away continue to emphasize dialectics the fact that two seemingly contradictory things can both be right continue to develop problem solving skills and encourage the student person to emphasize commitment control and challenge have them identify those things in their life that are important to them those things they are committed to their family their faith their pets their friends whomever have them identify what things in each of those areas they can control and have them look at life as a challenge and it's a challenge to continue to strive to improve those areas and work towards those things that are truly important in their life in high school they're moving on to identity versus role confusion so they're developing that ever fragile identity so encourage appreciation of individual differences let them learn when they do group work not everybody's going to have the same skills so this is when you synergize Sally is really good at note taking and writing and John is really good with doing the experiments then when you do your chemistry lab John will do the experiment Sally will take the notes on it and everybody else will put in input or something but encourage them to look at what they don't have or what the somebody else doesn't have that they have encourage them to look at it like a balancing act or puzzle pieces that fit together to make a whole encourage them to start learning how to develop a win-win situation when they are communicating with their friends in order to handle conflict you know this is what I need to have done and this is how it will benefit you when it's finished you know and it could be I need help moving and I will be extremely appreciative that may be enough but you want to make help you start developing these social skills now and have them start developing and identifying their values what's important to them and parents can go online and print out a list of like 50 of the top values and have the youth look at it and identify the top 10 or 15 that they think are important that they think characterize them like honesty loyalty creativity you know whatever you can find the list and these are things that if we plant them in the children's path they can say oh yeah that's important to me and then when they're starting to make a decision they're going to think back on you know one of the values that's important to me is loyalty is am I being loyal in terms of moral reasoning they're still often looking at being good and living up to what others expect mainly from that social circle now oftentimes social obedience is a must during high school so they're working on trying to please their friends and their parents at the same time it can be a very stressful situation which is why it's important for us as parents or for these clinicians helping parents to help them figure out how to help the youth navigate you know how can you create a win-win your friends want you to go out and stay out until 2 a.m. on Saturday night but your curfew is 12 you know how do you how do you work that situation safety needs we still need to protect them from bullying and at this point they're going out on their own my son just started driving oh my gosh we can't protect them we can't you know control every aspect of their life but we do need to make sure that we provide them as much safety and knowledge as possible when they're going out there into the world in high school common observations there's a strong desire to either conform or to rebel and you know a lot of times when people are rebelling they are with a social group that is rebelling and not just out there on their own but sometimes they are so we want to look at what the youth is embracing help them develop psychological flexibility what does that mean that means becoming aware becoming mindful of how I'm feeling what I'm wanting and needing right now and then you have two choices you can engage in thoughts and behaviors that move you away from what you already identified as important or you can engage in thoughts and behaviors in relation to this situation that will move you closer to those things that are important so if a student hates school and you know it's not uncommon to hear that alright that's what's going on right now but you want to be a computer programmer when you grow up alright that's important to you to have a career that pays the bills and you know this one you chose computer programming so does avoiding your homework help you get closer to or further away from that goal well further away okay yeah you want to avoid your homework but probably not the best behavior to do in order to help you get closer to your goal so encouraging them to accept how they feel in the moment and make choices about what to do about that help them to get closer to those things that are important and it works really well if you chart it out for them and increase capacity for oops I skipped ahead they seek belonging at this age they are competitive outside of the group rather than within so we want to encourage our youth to challenge group think with by using dialectics so if you happen to have a youth that's especially political mine is and he talks about groups in terms of huge generalizations and we have to stop him and go okay let's consider the other person's point of view and how could they be right or what points might they have that are valid in order to help him get out of his single single mind they have intense feelings and emotions so because of growth because of hormones because of everything because of identity development we want to educate them about vulnerability prevention make sure they get enough sleep make sure they're eating enough make sure that they are doing things to encourage and increase the happy in their lives all of those things are going to help them be less emotionally vulnerable and you can look into dialectical behavior therapy on vulnerability prevention it's really helpful with teenagers help them develop mindfulness and distress tolerance and be patient with their rapidly changing interests and ambitions they're going to explore at this point you know they may want to be a project manager one day and MBA the next and you know an astronaut the next who knows they don't have to make a decision right now they have increased capacity for independence so we want to support them taking on increased responsibilities but criticize constructively not that's a stupid idea but let's look at constructively what might happen here my son briefly went through a phase where he decided he wanted to go from doing something in computers to going into law enforcement and you know his dad was in law enforcement for 20 years so you know I can't say no and I wouldn't say no but we looked at it and I presented my case against it you know emphasizing the fact that he had to make the choice that was going to make him happy but these were my concerns and you know that was sort of constructive because it gave him some things to think about besides just the rosy picture he was thinking about so you want to present constructive evidence not emotional evidence youth are self critical and self conscious at this age so encourage the development of healthy self esteem and encourage them to do things and reflect on how they're a good person and puberty continues so things that we want to help parents as well as communities and teachers do we want to help everybody including the youth have knowledge of health promoting behaviors and the impact of risky behaviors that way they can make an educated decision we want to help them develop negative attitudes towards substances and substance use because a little substance can really wreak havoc in an adolescent brain encourage them to bond to pro social culture both online and in real life encourage somewhat of an internal locus control internal locus of control if you remember back to counseling 101 means the youth believes that they have control over things that happen to them now none of us has control over everything which is why I say a somewhat internal locus of control we need to accept there's certain things out of our control but when they feel like they've got agency in affecting things in their life they're going to fare a lot better emotionally they view parents teachers doctors law enforcement and other adults as allies they feel socially competent they're involved in alternate activities not just school they have a sense of well-being and self-confidence and positive future plans and a view of the future so all of these things can help buffer youth against depression anxiety and substance abuse if they have a sense of humor if they're perceptive if they love learning if they're self-motivated if they can figure out how to persevere even if they're bored or they hate what they're doing if they're creative if they have a sense of personal competence and psychological flexibility again all of those things help them help buffer against bad things that happen and help them have a better chance of avoiding anxiety and depression and stuff family protective factors close family relationships characterized by communication and compassion consistency in rules and consequences expectations and even personal behaviors you know they want to see consistency because a lot of times what we do is a whole lot more impactful than what we say to our children so if we react a certain way or if we do a certain thing the child wants to see that consistently encourage parents to only have a few simple rules or expectations the more rules you have the more you gotta keep track of involve the children in developing the rules post the rules visually teach the rules systematically and reinforce the rules especially at high rates especially when you're talking about young children for example when we do when I switch up chores at the house I have a check sheet that each child goes through and initially after we switch chores or chore duties I'll go through and I will check chores every single day and then I will back off to once a week and then once a month so but initially I'm giving them feedback relatively regularly mindfulness that is monitored or that is modeled in the family can help serve as a protective factor so children learn to become mindful families that encourage education and parents that are actively involved in education even if you can't help Johnny with his homework if you're actively involved then it goes a long way to helping him push through a family that models positive coping skills and health behaviors provides a learning environment for children to develop and grow same thing if they teach life skills doing laundry making meals etc a family that encourages supportive relationships with adults outside of the family can also be a protective factor and this doesn't mean everybody but this can mean teachers clergy scout troop leaders whatever so you've learned that there are trustable people trustworthy people in the world encourages supportive relationships with adults shares family responsibilities and family members are nurturing and support each other appreciating one another generously so you're not only hearing from somebody in the family when you've done something wrong it's important that people regularly nurture one another with kind words peer protective factors include pro-social values intolerance of bullying health promoting behaviors so peers that are into exercising and eating healthy are going to greatly influence one another peers model effective interpersonal skills relationships are characterized by trust communication and mutual support peers are mutually involved in substance free activities and they disapprove of alcohol and drug use remember peers are pretty much the greatest influence on youth at this age school protective factors that we can help develop positive attitudes towards school what is it that you're getting out of this place what are some benefits to your school regular school attendance a school that encourages understanding academic achievement and positive social development a positive instructional climate leadership and decision making opportunities for students parents and community members so everybody feels like they're involved a school can sponsor substance free events to give youth something to do when schools not in session and schools need to be responsive to students needs for safety affiliation and diversity of experience so we need to be sensitive to youth and provide them opportunities to engage one another not just to be there for eight hours to be taught to the test community protective factors opportunities for community involvement including volunteering laws that are consistently enforced informal social control and norms that encourage pro-health and pro-social behaviors community service opportunities resources now obviously this pertains more to the parents than the children but children need to have safe housing health care they need to have somewhere to go so child care is important it's important that parents have jobs so or access to some sort of income so they can have less stress and they can afford to you know keep a roof over the head and there needs to be recreation opportunities parks you know it doesn't have to be organized stuff but places children can go to recreate and comprehensive prevention focused programs available for children parents of children and adolescents can be super helpful and I found that attendance at those tends to be best if they're held in libraries or community centers so seven parenting tips and tools were almost to the end people promise consistency consistent in what you do what you say what you expect provide unconditional positive regard remembering to love the child and dislike the behavior provide positive redirection by identifying the function of the behavior that you don't like and helping the child find an appropriate alternative way to get that need met so for example if you want my attention instead of saying mommy mommy every five seconds until I turn around and I go what what can you do to get my attention that that's positive or instead of running around in the aisles on the airplane what can you do when you get bored effective communication between parents is important so everybody's on the same page and with the child being age appropriate helping them increase their emotional vocabulary and teaching them active listening and I think most of us have done that occasionally with our young children when we've said okay you know what did mommy just ask you to do so they're learning to paraphrase a little bit and as they get older we don't have to say now tell me what I just said but they're a bit more used to it model communication coping health behaviors positive relationships mindfulness and self-awareness so if you're having a rough day if you're exhausted acknowledge that you're exhausted and go take a nap or something model appropriate behaviors to for self care and vulnerability prevention help children learn why it's important to eat enough why it's important to get good enough sleep why it's important to take a bath with soap so behaviors that persist over time are usually working for the child gotta remember that and go okay what's the benefit and how can we find a different way to meet this need challenging behaviors often have a message and serve a purpose so again ask that question what's the purpose positive directions involve asking the child to do something instead of asking him to stop doing something so instead of saying stop hitting your sister say when your sister upsets you I need you to come tell me or go to your room or whatever the case is that allows Johnny to have another response option if the child were given alternative appropriate behaviors they're often going to use those in place of challenging behaviors they just need them building relationships assists youth in learning to communicate those feelings of empathy and provides a supportive environment in which children can learn and grow and finally children of all ages may need activities to minimize inappropriate behavior I mean even adults do sometimes but they don't have to be physical activities so we can encourage children you know if you're having difficulty sitting still what can you do can you draw can you color can you write can you think about something in your own head in order to help them to learn to tolerate those times when they may be bored or stressed out I saw a lot of stuff that went through yes the way we react to how things go that models for a child what's the appropriate response how do I behave when something if they tell you something or they do something that makes you angry you know what's an appropriate way to express anger and if you like freak the freak out then they may a get scared and B develop a belief that that's how you respond when you're angry so we do want to make sure that we model the stuff that we want our children to pick up on alrighty everybody I'm sorry I ran a little bit over to today Jason pointed out for those of you who didn't see it Ellen Satter's work on nutrition and the family is amazing so you may want to check that out I'm sure you can Google it Ellen and Satter is S-A-T-T-Y-R okay everybody I'll see you on Thursday


All right. I am going to show you a stamp set from the new mini catalog. I think it's one that we, I don't know that many people focus on it because it's not a holiday or seasonal stamp set, but it's this Herb Decasions set. It's a bundle. It has this cute stamp set with lots of fun sayings and some cute little images. I love to color with the stamp and blends. So I knew I wanted to play with this one and then it bundles with a punch that you can put the different sayings into or you can punch it out and make a fun interactive cart. So I'm going to show you some different ways to make interactive cards with this. So first I'll show you just some cute ones that aren't. This is just stamping it on that cute punch. I stamped the car on some designer series paper and just cut it out the way. Here's another one with it just stamped. And I think Wink of Stella is like the name of the game. Got to get the Wink of Stella on there. So those are some fun ones that aren't interactive, but one of the best parts about this set is that you can make a card that is kind of a mooly card. So I have a few different ways to show you how to do this. This is kind of one of those techniques that is an oldie but a goodie too. So if you've never made a penny card, this is how you do it. This card is, there's some expense to it. You're going to have to have some pennies, but it's okay because it just makes sense. Sorry, I had to think. It's like Olaf. Anyway, so you'll need two pennies and dimensionals. And I'm going to give you a tip for the dimensional.  You want to make it, and I'm doing a terrible job of trimming it, but you want to make it rounded instead of a hexagon. Is that what we are? Yeah. You want to try and make it into a circle instead. And the reason for that is that we're going to put our pennies together with this dimensional. And then the dimensional is what's going to run on our little track. And you want that to be able to spin without a hexagon getting in the way of it.  So you'll take your rounded dimensional and just stick it in between your two pennies. And this is the whole trick of that card. Okay, so I'll show you how to do it.  And I just stuck the punch all the way down from the top and punched it right out of the little disco ball that I had already stamped on there. And then you can see on the card, so I had that one. I stamped and colored another one behind it, and then I had the moving one. So it always looks like a disco ball. Okay, and then you're going to take your penny or your pennies and you're just going to slide them right in between your punch. And it will just roll back and forth on there.  And with another dimensional, I like to put it onto the penny itself. And then one of the, I don't know what the law is, but maybe physics. If the weight is distributed unevenly, it's going to roll better. Any scientists here that that makes sense? Okay, physics sounds good. So if you put the, if you position the image so that it's not in the center of your image, it's going to have some, like one side is going to be heavier than the other. Does that make sense? So then it will make it roll better. So then you have your rolling card and then you just put it together.  Okay, next I'm going to show you how to do one that will go all the way around. So this is a five and a quarter by one and a half piece. And I'm going to do the same thing.  I'm just going to punch and then I'm going to flip it and I'm going to line it up so that it overlaps here. And I know it's going to kind of keep that track going. Okay. So just like that. And then I already have some pennies that I've made. So I'm going to just slip that into my track and you'll have the same kind of thing. We'll put our image on, which this time is a roller skate. This one's a little trickier to cover up because it wants to be in the middle in order to cover up the petty. But the weight is still distributed well enough that it'll roll just like that. And then just put it on a cute card. Add some Wink of Stella, of course. And you have a fun little interactive carding. One more. This is just a four by four piece that I stamped some of those cute cakes on. And on this one, I wanted to do something different.  And I wanted to make more of like a spinning card than a rolling card. So what I did, I took my two pieces that I had punched from my coral piece. And I'm just going to adhere them just like this. I'll share one down first. So you're kind of making the fur Elise sign not branded. Before I stick this one down, I'm going to put my penny in just like that. And I want to make sure that my petty can still turn in there, which it can. So then I'll take my image. And this one is big because I want to cover up all the things. If it's smaller, you could cut these down. But I'm just going to put my cute little happy birthday in there. He'll just have a little spinny one. And I stamped this happy birthday all around the edge of the decolled circles died. And I thought that was really cute. It fit in there super well. So let me show you the card that I finished. And it's just a cute little spinning card. Okay.


Welcome to the World Summit on the Information Society 2016 in Geneva, Switzerland. And I'm joined by Leon Strauss, President of the International Federation of Information Processing. So it's the ICT's professionals. Can you tell me why are you coming to the WISIS Forum? As the Federation of Information Professionals, it is something we feel very important for us. We acquire a lot of knowledge on ICT, both in development, in research and in applications. And all this knowledge should be shared, definitely with those countries that are lagging behind and do not have the resources and capabilities to benefit from the advances in ICT. And how exactly do you go about sharing all of this knowledge? The most common thing to do is organizing conferences where we invite people from all disciplines, researchers, politicians, practitioners, to share the needs and to share the experiences on both sites. And that's very effective in the last ten years. We've been doing that since the Millennium Development Goals, since the WISIS started actually. Because I can imagine that what works in the West won't necessarily work in some of the developing countries. Exactly. Not one-to-one. I mean, the technology and the application is obviously similar, but the constraints are different, the local circumstances are different. So we need the involvement of both parties, of both sites to discuss what is possible and what is needed. What are the constraints? What are these sort of constraints, for example? Maybe the infrastructure is not yet ready. Maybe the level of education is not at the level it should be to advance, to benefit to the maximum. So there's quite a few different perspectives to look at. So in fact there's a lot of building capacity or training of people in these applications. Exactly. And I understand that you are going to be speaking at a high level session tomorrow. What's your main message there? My main message is partnership. I mean, we have a big community of professionals, but even that is sort of a volunteer-based effort with a lot of volunteers wanting to do something, but it's a partnership that's required because we need the local community, the educators, the governments, etc. So tomorrow I will make an appeal to look at partnerships, which is in the SDG number 17, to see how we can make progress. I mean, we've been talking about this for many years. So now let's see how we can come back next year and say we've managed to do a lot of partnerships. And what will you be looking at? Because what have you learnt is you say that this has been talked about for a number of years. So what have you learnt about what makes a really good and solid partnership? I think one of the pitfalls is to start too ambitious. I think starting on a smaller scale, making sure you have a concrete proposal where you can show results that's beneficial and then the rest will follow. And you certainly can't copy and paste. It's something that has to be worked out. Precisely. Well, I wish you luck in getting the partnerships that you need at this WSIS Forum. Thank you very much for joining us, Leanne Strauss, who's the President of the International Federation on Information Processing. And please do stay tuned to the ITU YouTube channel, where you can see many of the videos that we'll be doing during the Forum. Thank you.


Yeah, so I'm staying here inside. I think I have a little cold. That's the problem Plus I want to show you a bunch of stuff How to know what's a pump and dump how to avoid them things like that so you meet a couple minutes as everyone gets in How's guys do today guys?  Let's start guys Oh Look at this crazy guy So a couple items guys couple items. I want to show you guys First is we are having a huge event guys huge event This is what bitcoins we are having our second annual Bootcamp last year was huge when we did we threw a free one in Philadelphia And Man, I miss I'm missing you guys. Seriously guys. This is corona thing. It's just the isolation That's killing everybody Fucks with your mental state So hopefully we'll have more meetups in the future when this whole corona thing so in the meantime, we are streaming So that's good news for people around the world last year. They wanted to streaming thing But you know we had the in-person so this year we have the streaming no in-person so can't win them all but you know that Okay, so that's it's going to sell out pretty fast guys I Mean we are basically giving it away. I don't know how much more cheap you want We can never give anything free anymore because you will never value it So space is limited because zoom is super expensive man I mean to get to another five or users. It's like $3,000 or something like that additional So we are basically giving this thing pretty much for free So usually on birthdays you get gifts on MIC's birthday. You get freebies and so you pretty much now have it A two-day event the first day is for everybody who wants to come and it's gonna be free for annuals and free for lifetime So hit up Tosh Hit up Tosh guys Let's show you, you know, if you want to screenshot this Tosh you can type type your number. I'm just too tired right now So if you want to upgrade we have unlisted promotions Which is going to be the pretty much the cheapest we have this Around this year because this is pretty much our birthday guys and MIC second birthdays only this two years can't believe it Right guys.  So Might as well learn from the best guys. I mean, this is this is I don't know how much cheaper I just can't believe that we don't have 10,000 people wanting to learn how to trade. This is not a sales pitch We are teaching you how to trade When you come to the bootcamp online Okay We want to educate you guys to avoid crap like this Let me show you To avoid pump and dump and I'll go into detail about what this pump and dump means. Okay a little bit So any questions guys? I want to make sure that you guys have any what is stopping you from joining the You see, where's that thing here? Seriously, so I want to know okay all the people that are attending right now the IG live Let me know if you're attending to say yes attend or no if you can attend.  I'm sick. I My I'm grouchy.  I'm just curious because you know, is it because you're cheap 200 bucks or $97.  How much did you lose? Are you willing to invest $200 in education guys? Are you going out to eat?  Things like that, you know a man life is about opportunity cost guys This is not an expensive educational program. If you can't afford $197 you should not trade I'm I swear to God if you do not have $197 Everybody should have $197 if they live in the United States they can forego something, but you know their hardship cases I'm not saying I grew up very poor.  Okay, if you trading is not the solution guys To curing all sorts of diseases all illnesses all things you have trading should supplement your income And you know what to be honest if you don't have money and you can't even buy food To feed yourself and you're on the streets, you know How is trading gonna help you first first work on your personal life guys? Because I tell you right now man. You have to get your personal affairs in order Otherwise your trades will be in chaos because if you don't have a home to live I mean, I've been there man my family's group, you know came on a boat from Vietnam We were immigrants we you know We we we actually got taken in by a family and church and we stayed at their house, you know So I understand poverty At that time we're not looking to trade You know saying first you get your life in order to get a job in McDonald's Starbucks Alex started his career at Starbucks He was making minimum wage at Starbucks and then he started to learn education training So how much money you need to learn to start? Nothing education first. It's like I want to become an engineer. How much is it because I come in here?    Okay, so make sure this is not gonna happen again next year It's not gonna be $97. I tell you that this is only $97 because it's COVID guys and You know what man? We're screaming this and we want everybody to learn guys Okay, and so talk to toss we have it We came out with an accelerator program to so I mean we we are basing having 60% off of that course and you want it Okay, so whatever it is. I'm gonna admit right now 60% off. So text Tosh Text Tosh 60% off and asking what the promotions are guys Okay, so we we have we don't have this as a sell But I'm just gonna tell you right now man I think I'm pissed off for enough for absolute not help you guys because I see these guys selling old outdated DVD bullshit We are actually teaching guys how to trade guys. We are teaching you how to trade for real We are price actually very cheap for what we offer. So text Tosh as all I can say I don't want to get into much of that detail Today's rent is supposed to be Today's rent It's supposed to be on Man, I just I wanted to educate you okay, so I did one thing today. I posted a lot of charts Okay, ongoing. I won't post any more charts. I reserve that for the education of the guys at MSE go to my Twitter See the charts I posted go to Instagram. I posted it last night some charts, too So every day you see those charts They're not fake guys. Those are the process that we teach you the members are learning on how to Trade our system.   I made it all back. I'm the best. I think you shouldn't fucking do that I guarantee you that any year Alex will make more than them Alex, I think it was a what 18 grand a day On on 30 minutes of trading trading the process You won't see a hundred thousand dollars from him every day You may see it once in a while when the opportunity is there But these guys are trying to force trades where it doesn't exist because they do not have the process Worse than not having a process.   This is the time frame. Okay This is the intraday chart Sucker peeked out at way high, right?     I wish I had a short little cake. Alex had found one I wish I won it was a dollar was just way too much money.  This is as illegal.   I am going to steal your money Is that legal? That's honest questions.   So if I put that disclaimer out like that Does that make it legal?  I see and And they're just crying.  I'm not here to protect anybody. Okay. I'm here to protect my members And trust me, man.  I have to say something guys seriously, man I mean, I mean When you're in a position guys when you're in a position to help someone Right is right and wrong is wrong.      And so I wanted to educate you this Okay, so I'm going to show you exactly what's going on. Okay, and I'm going to tell you how to avoid it Or how to better.   It's way under v-wap and if it wasn't for the chat room pumper You know, it will keep going down. So this is this is basically They're manipulating it But there's a famous quote. I keep posting all the time the markets will remain Irrational longer than you can stay liquid Okay Basically says this this thing will be irrational longer than you can go before you go bankrupt You will go bankrupt, but end up right. So example if you load the boat here And you're shorting gaps him because you know that it's fake It's fake.  It could go up to 18 bucks.  The only thing we know, you know, this is like, okay Where's the view up? Where's the lines? Where's all this stuff? So we teach you the process the moment that you know There we go. You draw a line here. So there's a little resistance here So you knew where it was already there's another resistance 14 bucks So the point is this man, even though you're right, you can still go broke The key is timing And that's the process that we teach you You have so much meat on the back end You do not need to top tick any of this shit If you're an expert like alex or i you can try because you have very good risk management You can stop out right but a lot of you guys will not you'll freeze and freeze. So This is why m i c guys are so successful We scream every day. Avoid the front side.   This stock didn't have many low-case or low-case or a dollar, but then I'll show you another example a t h e He stopped in the the v wall was all the way at four bucks with a 50 sound of the water And he moved it up to himself for five bucks.  You just can't fight it like that.     That's why alex nail 18 grand on this talk today guys 18 grand Okay, same thing with this.   What happens? Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye And what happens there's no more buyers left. Who's gonna bid? Everybody is looking to sell now Every buyer who has entered that stock long Is now looking Finger on the sell button finger on the sell button.  So basically they're all now trying to sell and so what happens when all the sheep sell? Creators the stock tanks is called a waterfall Who was that to buy it?    There's no shorts here. There's no natural bit support.     We make money because they bring they bring in volume okay But once in a while I just get disgusted because like man, I don't I don't want to get into specifics I I rented so much in my room today.     I'm tearing out man.      Okay, and don't give me no excuses I can't afford if you can't afford it.   You need some money to trade seriously One of our one of our moderators had 700 dollars in his trading account. His name is tom diesel We we we have a video on that. Okay. He lost all his money. He has 700 dollars left You know he did he drove an uber at night for two months He learned mic system Traded very small And he went from 700 to six figures dude. He's like a six-figure trader from 700. He got it. He bought a house And I don't want to get into all that I want But it's all on there, man You see these question please stories all the time and you know why because he educated himself He's trading against these motherfuckers because what's gonna happen is man. You make money guys. Seriously.      You see how that works And that's why these guys are telling you hot keys.      So you knowing where the lines are you know in the process?   I'm not talking about any motherfucker. Do you think I'm talking about you? That means you're guilty I am not talking about anyone. This is the whole chat pump and double I've been That I know For past two decades. I used to run all these charities There's a reason why I never went to jail You know, there's a reason why they hate me There's a reason why I don't pump in my room. You M.I.C. has 1500 members guys You're never seeing this pump, right guys the guys that are watching right now. Do you guys see us pump?  I want to teach you guys I could easily alert I can either mean even me and alex are tabs, right?  So be serious I mean if you ask alex and tosh, I don't want to share tosh what I buy.  He shares that we all see the watch list. We all know what stocks are in play But we don't know exactly what I'm buying what I'm selling exactly what the point is And that's what trading is very difficult because you can know the best Entry prices, but can you have the discipline?    So what they do is it?   They pump the sympathy. That's how these sympathies That's how these sympathies run. Okay.  So now they're free riding the position So that they can't say oh, I'm dumping my position Oh, that's why you see lollies motherfuckers.    I've been in this game.       You take a look dude I'm the guy with a clean criminal record I'm the guy the only guy that helps people I'm the only motherfucker that helps people. I'm the only guy that gets on IG live every day walks around like alex We have meet-up face-to-face.  They're gonna come at me.  You're gonna see trolling. They may I don't have fake troll accounts They do if you take a look at some of the big trolls. Why are they trolling me? I'm the only legitimate motherfuckers in the industry. These other motherfuckers are not clean I'm the only guy who wants to see people face to face. Who doesn't meet up.  I why would I be scared? You wouldn't ever see them talking like this. They all befriended me by the way.   Maybe we'll get us all in trouble I'm like, but I didn't know rap. Don't worry about that motherfucker. I know rap, but if if congress calls me I might be on tv testifying I won't but I'm just saying it's for funny.    What did he help someone right? I want to help people. So that's it and so That's what we do.  I might get assassinated you seriously And that's this is where we actually this is why I started MIC with Alex.   Take a look at my podcast If you did not see the podcast that we did with uh that I did lately That's the podcast read it. I mean watch and listen to it. I talk about offerings I talk about how the game is rigged. I talked about all this stuff. Okay, so the podcast we did for MIC guys Watch it. There's a two-parter on it And when I beat their system on the second part and Fannie Mae, they shut me out They they they kicked me out. They banned me from the routes.   Look at Kodak.    They opened fake accounts of your name and all that no one went to jail They got a small fight And I promise to not do it again Training I promise to do training.  Please do not open accounts under Dude, please do not do identity fraud. Please do not open other people's accounts under their name without them knowing Please do not take money from my account without me knowing.  You can do two things.    We go to jail.    It's just going to mutate to another forum Once a crook always a crook they just find different ways to be a crook cool guys I will see you guys around then We're gonna make it quick and easy today. I'll leave you on your way guys All right. Good luck.


Of course, we started here in Whiteman Park for the first passes of the morning, then headed to Kalamanya. It's been a fantastic day, weather-wise, glorious for the spectators and they've come out in numbers, I've got to say. We're now back at Wagon Park, going in the reverse direction. Some interesting things up and down the leaderboard. Our leader in the outright positions for modern, Peter May, just done a fabulous job. He's got a head gasket issue, which he's dealing with. We're hearing reports, they may pull it into Park Fermay tonight. If that's the case, you'll get a penalty. We may have a new, effective, target leader, which would see young Brett Wilkinson in the lead. Matt O'Neill, they're having a ding-dong battle in his Subaru as well, so modern still lots to play for and we'll be interested to speak to them at service very shortly. Classic-wise, they started dead even, of course, we have Paul Maltoni and Simon Gunson in his run. They were even this morning. Now, Gunson had an issue earlier on today and is now charging back, but got a good lead Paul Maltoni at the moment, so how they manage that to tomorrow as well will be interesting to talk to them about. Something we hadn't spoken about so far is, of course, the challenge section. Simon Gunson's wife, Sharon, she's leading the modern, doing a fantastic job in her EVO and in our challenge sections for the classics, we've got Martin Iyer in his triumph doing a fabulous job there, so lots of stories up and down the field. We'll look forward to speaking after their run through here at Whiteman Park in the service for the end of day two. You were just having the conversation that we all want to know, what's the plan to be with everyone at the moment? Ah, we're still working that one out. Yeah, the million dollar questions. We take it out in service at tonight and do the head or head gasket or do we run the gauntlet? It's it's going all right. Like the longest ages, it doesn't like it. It blows cool and out and it gets hot. So this stuff's not too bad. I just just doing what I can in the car just to be a little bit smooth on the throttle and not give it lots of boost and blow water out of it. If I told you, but obviously peak major is looking at taking that car apart from you could be our effective rally leader overnight. Yeah, unfortunately, Pete's having some heating issues with the car. It's getting hot. So yeah, I think we pulled in a little bit on him in Whiteman Park. So 21 seconds to go if he pulls it out will be a nine second lead. But hey, you know, who's counting the numbers? Let's we've still got two more days to go. What's going on with your car at the moment? How's it all travel? You won't believe this, will you? It's an alternator again. No, we had problems at Whiteman one this morning where a pin dropped out of the accelerator cable. So we lost two minutes there. Well, nearly three minutes. And this is just the alternator stop charging again. So we're back to where we were last year. It's like deja vu, isn't it? It's unbelievable. So they caught us in that stage. Oh, I don't know if actually might have gone. They might have sped through a speed zone. I don't know if they really caught us more than you would really think was possible. But nonetheless, we didn't do a good stage at stage. We came into a lunch break and we tightened all the suspension up because she was very floaty at the high speeds. And the next one out, we nailed it. We absolutely nailed it. Eight minutes and four seconds with the Calamundas stage. That was the fastest time. I think it was six fathers outright, even with the modern cars. You're leading the challenge section in classics, which is awesome. You've done a fabulous job today. Yeah, it's a miracle. Yeah, I took a span out in a bush there. Had some sun and a few little trees. And I don't know, I wasn't a leader, that's excellent. End of day two and Sharon Gunsley doing a fabulous job again in challenge for modern. You're leading it. Showing the boys how to do it once again. Yeah, absolutely.  Really, driving is the easiest job in this team, isn't it?  So, yeah, look, we've had two really, really good days. Today was a really good day. So, yeah, I think we've finished about 54, 58 seconds ahead. So that tax is comfortably into tomorrow, you know, we can just drive the lines nicely, keep it on the black stuff and hopefully we'll bring it home again. So, yeah, it's a good day.