Hey, what's up, world? It's your man Carlos Miller, man.   We got all that, all of that, man, from, like, one's is for the baby. We even got special items for the ladies coming out with my own foot massager. Well, that's what I'm going to call it anyway. Whatever, that's 85aparicode.com.  Yo, Indianapolis, April 14th, I'm coming to the Helium Company Club, grab them tickets because they don't sell now. Yes, I'm doing it in my 600-pound LifeLive. This is the last year that I'm going on tour doing this, so you better get them tickets now because I don't want to hear, oh, you didn't come in and do it. Yes, I'm coming April 14th at the Helium Company Club. Go ahead and get them tickets now. They don't sell them. Something just like that. That came in, like, 2007. I don't know why it just... That came in, like, 2007 to me. You know what I would use this in? Like, if I had a movie and I was doing, like, a cleanup or a rebuild montage, I'd use it on that. Yeah, it's montage music. I'm going to go to the island and a couple weeks and just sleep for two days. Which island are you going to? I don't know, man. Go to Anguilla. What's up the way?  Yeah, you can go to Anguilla. You got to fly to St. Martin, then you got to take a boat to Anguilla. I've never been to Anguilla.  And they got some good-ass food over there. Yeah? Food, good in the month. I'm all about that food. I just need a break. Yeah, and they chilling.  You deserve it, pal. You got to enjoy it when they're with you. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I can't stop. I don't really forget to goddamn celebrate, baby. Close my door, please. I don't want nobody looking in on me. Hell, yeah, man. It's been a hard motherfucking month. Hmm. Let's go. Already. The month just started. You mean last month? Last month was great. New TV projects on the way. Come on. Hell, yeah. And I'm studying little aerospace technology on the side. It's independent. Yeah, biochemistry. OK.  I'm talking to the people at SpaceX about possibly getting in the program. Rocket propulsion is the next level, son. Yeah, that's where I'm at with it. Yeah. Niggas ain't up on that.  Rocket propulsion, they got different levels of different type of. You want to say, I'm not a rocket scientist. Most definitely. Propulsion is the next level. Exactly. And not too many niggas know a propulsion nigga. See, that's what I'm saying. I'm already out of niggas league when it comes to the verbiage.  Only summers? Yeah, I ain't be busy throughout the year. Right.  I say that for the summer. I got time for it in the summer. The niggas are aerodynamic summer schools. Yeah. You feel me? Niggalur Airflow. That's what I'm saying. And it's all about how you manipulate the digestive tract. I hope motherfuckers is ready for what we're about to do today, man. Because you might not know this. But let me give you a 85 South Show quick fact. What's a quick fact? Donnell Rollins is one of the first guests that I ever had on the show. He was in the office, son. Exactly. As soon as I came in here, I said, the come up is real, nigga. Most definitely.   But you know, shout out to Steve Harvey for not charging us no rent. We was using that space for free. My nigga Joe sacrificed his whole job for that, man. That's how you got to do. You got to jump up here. Hell, yeah.  He's been smoking weed out of a pipe. Yeah.  He get off at five. But in this space? No, I'm saying back then. Oh, yeah. So I got one of my original OG guests on the show today. Come on, man. OG don't run around, man. This is the full circle. Yes, sir. When I told you when you came to the office, then that it was going to happen.   But as soon as I wanted it, I was like, hmm, it's a lot different. And it's like, a lot of times people don't see your vision. Y'all always knew y'all, which our vision was. Yeah. And instead of like, what are we going to do? Y'all motherfuckin' did it. So this is an era in a time where give them off because they fly away. So you got to get 85 South Beach House. Hell yeah. Took it from an office. Nigga, it was not our office. We weren't supposed to be there. A spot. This nigga was not supposed to be there. Nobody was supposed to be there. This nigga was opening the door and letting us in and acting like you didn't see it. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Nigga's trying to make it sound like Steve was like, yeah, come on. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, sir.  No, dude.  Steve walked in one name.  You niggas, you niggas think y'all smart. Y'all think y'all slick. The camera must have been on, son.  It was in the hallway. He walked out and said it. He definitely didn't say it on camera. But they don't know. Steve Harvey, a gangster, one character off.  Oh, yeah.  I'm pretty sure he does. When the camera y'all cut, he right back to it. You got to get it all out. That's the only way you're going to be able to be clean on TV. You got to cuss. You got to get them cuss words out. Motherfucker that never cuss. Like that Bill Cosby shit, right? See, you could have said people right there, but you said motherfuckers. And it's more motherfuckers than there are people. Yeah. Yeah, way more. Man, yeah. Because you didn't walk there in spite of like, there's so many motherfucking people in here. A lot of motherfucking people in here. There's a lot of motherfucking people in here. They don't never see it, but it's how they see it. It's like 15 motherfuckers. Everybody working. This is light. This is light. Oh, I can't, the crew don't come off of me.  This light knows. Who on who? Who coming today? Nah, I'm taking the day off.   No, it's the crew. But sometimes normally it'd be more people that we all, a lot of times we don't know who. I almost fired there a couple of weeks ago. Because I finally seen how that nigga right.  He had the R backwards like towards our rust. It was Donnell raw.  We got the backwards on. Hell yeah. Then he didn't even put Donnell. This nigga put Darnnell.  That's racist.  And they put the new magazine, the magazine.  It could be Donnell, brother. How do you say, Donnell, yes? Yes, yes, yes. I am liking it.  My nigga, he was out there when I came out to the summer camp.  I was a river nigga, son. River nigga. I was a river, I was a river nigga, but then I was a little too tough. So I said, let me break it down to the river ninja. But I had a good time. We was in the cornfields for two years doing shows where nobody was doing shows, doing stuff that nobody was doing. I tell people all the time, they was like, well, how was 2020 for you? Like financial was probably one of the worst years I had. But mentally, in a piece, it was dope, man. We was out there.  Because back then, people was critical of the choices you made. You couldn't post a picture without a mask or anything. Oh, look at this nigga.  He out here breathing on motherfuckers. He could have had that shit, give it to my aunt. She got diabetes.  But we had, we was lucky enough that we had tested when we was out there. Damn sure, did. He was mad at that. They was like, oh, it must be nice to have rich friends that can afford to test people. I was like, you're absolutely right. Hell yeah. And we was out there living until you came out there. We tried to give you the COVID.   It wasn't you. It wasn't me. You came, you came. Did you come twice? I came one time. And the time you came was when the bubble got busted. Man, I stayed up. What happened? Somebody had COVID in there? We had like 59 shows. The summer was over. And we had a clean record. The whole summer was over. They agreed, he asked, he wanted to do more shows. I'm like, let's just end with it with being like now. He extended another week. And the next week he extended it. That's when the bubble, it was when you came. That's when the bubble popped.   Nah, it was unfortunate because I knew how excited. I wanted you to get the whole experience.  Did you even see the show? Did you see the show? Yeah. That first night? Yeah.  So wait a minute, you was like from what I saw online, it looked like you was the board dad. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You was really taking people. I was like the camp counselor because everybody was there. But then we didn't really, like Dave's wife was used to playing activities like she'd be like, oh, today we're going to do sipping paint, right?   That river was so goddamn peaceful. And I was like this, I'm just going to control this.  And as much as many shows we did, everybody, they liked the shows and like the other stuff, but everybody was excited about going on the river.  I rolled down the flute, floated down the river. And what you just did in the canoe by yourself?  I started with kayaks. I liked the canoe better because you had somebody in there.    That thing was broken in the shell.  Everybody. Yeah, that was, well, Ken Rock flew down there. When he floated down the river, and you know, people have questions about him. And it was funny. Yeah, I was about to say, I wasn't, I wasn't, I would have elbowed that motherfucker. And that's an interesting man. Accident, or accident, or accident. You would have bumped him or hurt him so.  My bad. Yeah, I'm sorry about that. But he rolled down the river. He said, man, I feel like, I've done this river for 30 minutes. I feel like I had 12 hours of anger management. So everybody went down. It was definitely something zen and something peaceful about going down the river. It was dope.  Most of it, yeah. That's what I heard. This motherfucker on the whole town, right? And that's the Yellow Springs? Yeah, Yellow Springs, yeah.  Whole Airbnb. I went to the pieces shop to get some pieces, they was like. They might have thought you was going to rob them too, because there ain't a lot of niggas in Yellow Springs.  I think any nigga that pull up in any of those stores, they would say that. They owe them. Naturally. It ain't enough for y'all, so we give you something when you come through. And they got nothing to do with the hoodie. That's like a uniform for robbery right there. Why people see a hoodie? They be like, oh my God, I'm getting nervous. And they the main one to wear hoodies though? Yeah, but we...  Because your pregnant start rapping.  Or shooting.    White dudes with bald heads usually try to date black women. Sneaky motherfuckers.  White dudes with bald heads and hoodies. Yeah. They try to embrace. Fades like black chicks. They try to lean into. They want to swim. As Dr. Umar said, they want to swim in the milk. I didn't go bald. That's what he said. I chose this. Swim in the milk. Oh yeah, that's, you know, Dr. Umar got all the phrases.  You bunny hopping. I don't know if you got to do this to get through the white vision, but you bunny hopping.  She's swimming in the milk. I didn't make these, he says.  Yeah, he got different.   No, he won't get caught with a white chick. He won't get caught with them, but I'm sure he'd be knocking them off here and there.   Revoke his dashikis if he did that, sir. All right, man. If you're an expert on anything, you got to look at it on close. I don't know, but Dr. Umar, I'm pretty sure he stay away from the pink toes. Pink toes. That's what they call it. You don't know these terms? Yeah, I don't know these. You know pink toes. Well, what if I don't know them? Fuckin' social clubs are you a part of? Pink toes. Pink toes. Like camel toes? Yeah. But they pink. What do they call the pink toes? No, white women actually have pink feet. I didn't get that far. I just stay up close to the vaginal area. Oh, man. I'm telling you. It's different degrees of white people, too. It's different degrees. It's some translucent white people. You can see they bang. White people ain't even really white people. That's like an offshoot of white people. You talking about the redhead white people? Yeah. That is like a subculture of white people. Yeah. You're not supposed to call them genders, like niggas. Right? I don't think black people be using terms like that. But not ginger. Oh, you got to take the e-all. Yeah. I said, I'm ginger. I said, ginger. Ginger. What's up, my ginger?  What's up, my ginger? I said, well, sit down, ginger. You got to be very specific with that. Don't go too far with that lotion. I'm going to dry up soon. Lead the lotion. Lead the lotion, man. Come on, man. Ask Larry. Ask the Lawrence. It's a new section. Oh, Ask the Lawrence. Let's go.  I got to say this. Welcome back to the Adidas South Club. Yeah. I ain't want to hit him with it. It's just somebody that said the magic word. You know what the magic word? Magic class. The magic word or phrase of the day is, Ashford Lawrence. Ashford Lawrence. They can even laugh differently. He laugh like this. Listen here, man. We got a special guest in the house with us today. Literally in the house. Do you see this refrigerator we got? We are. This is becoming more and more of a goddamn up. Look at the microwave, bitches. Why? Because. Because why not? We could have got an air fryer.  Microwave these bitches. But what I'm saying is, I got one of my OG guests here. He been all the way back to the Steve Harvest Studio. He got a hell of a look. Because I didn't know it was a studio. I knew it was office, man.  Yeah, I went up and did that first time. I was like, OK, but if you can feel the energy, you can feel something is blowing up. You can feel it that it was some people that was passionate about it.  Look around. A whole studio. New Netflix special on the way. Out. Out. Right now. You go watch it. Right now.  It's going to be watching it right after the interview. Oh, they might have watched it before. Because it's out. First flying high, you know how I feel. Come on, man. Breathe. Drifting on by high, you know how I feel. It's a new dawn. It's a new day. Negro spirit. It's a new life for me. You know I'm this eschelarist.   New day. Heal with us today. Netflix. Feeling good. Yeah. Ba-da-da-da-da-da. Congratulations, ma'am. You got a special out. Congratulations. You said you shot that motherfucker a couple times so you got it how you wanted it? Yeah, it was like about two years ago, Dave came to me. And this was after we had worked these shows in the corn field. You came out to the corn field show. Yeah, I came out to the show with him. And it was interesting because people always think that I, people would think that I came to Dave. Like, could you produce my special? He saw me rocking night after night at the corn fields. And we had already toured together, but it was just something different about the corn fields because it was a challenging audience. It was a difficult audience. It was a difficult time. And then he really got to connect with my set. And it was like, Donnell, I want to produce your special. I'm like, all right, whatever. We had talked about it. Sometime after that, right at the end of when the pandemic was on its heels, on its way out, we shot a special in Charlotte. It was our first stab at it. I ripped the show, did two shows, ripped the show, caught a standing ovation. I'm chest bumpin' Stan Latham. Ricky Hughes is excited. We're like, we got it. And then it was announced that Dave was producing a series of specials called The Home Team, which included Lunel. She did hers, Earthquake, Tony Woods, and myself. We had got to the point where we had announced that these specials are coming out. It was out in the trade magazines, whatever. It's coming out. And maybe like a week after that, I'm all amped. I'm like, oh, I'm finally getting a special out.  He said, Donnell, I hate to tell you this, don't get upset. I said, what? He said, but I want to shoot your special over.  That's the first thing you're gonna think. You ain't thinking of lightin' or nothin'. He said, you ain't thinkin' about nothing. I said, I said, why you want to shoot over? How'd I go from excitement of that night to you wanting to shoot it over? And he explained to me, he said, Donnell, you one of the funniest comedians I know, I can put you in any room and you will rip the room in half. He said, but don't make it a great special. He said, everybody that I'm producing specials for because of your relationship with me and the show, our friendship is that yours is gonna be the most anticipated. He said, if we do it, if we're gonna do it, we gotta do it right.   But I was like, the check had already cleared.  And then we- Do I gotta get this money back? It's another check. Nah, it went another check. Now the check was so big that I wouldn't even feel right asking for another one. No, that's why you did it. He was like, let me go. I wouldn't have felt right asking for another one. And then it was like, the climate, we lost half of our audience because our Netflix turned them away because of a vaccination card. It was just a tough situation period. I wasn't even thinking about it. Yeah, it was like, it was a tough, and then another thing he said, it's like, it's gonna feel old because I did a lot of COVID jokes and you can see people were masked. And if we would have shot that dinner and came out right now, you would have instantly went to 20, 20. You know what I'm saying? It would have instantly dated. So I'm like, all right, we looking for another date. Maybe a year after that, we was doing some shows in Napa Valley and Dave always record all his shows. So it was me, him and Ricky Hughes, super producer, Ricky Hughes. We're in the back, Dave said, ask Ricky how many cameras do we have here today? Ricky said, I got five cameras.  I said, when? He said, tomorrow.  Right. I did. We did it. Banged out another one. I called Robbie Proff from Netflix. I was like, I think we got it because nobody knew we was doing it. We didn't announce it or nothing. We was just gonna be like on the low, like, voila, look what we got. And maybe two weeks after that, this motherfucker caught me again. He said, I wanna do it over. I'm like, why? He said, I didn't like the production. I'm like, nigga, you the producer. Is that a form of self-hating? If you didn't like your own production? And then he said, like, he didn't like the lighting. And it wasn't, we just, it was just, we just took a chance. It wasn't like a production when you know what's gonna happen. If we get it, we get it. You know, it's a simple setup. It was super simple. Nobody knew we was doing it. And he said, let's, we gonna do it again. I'm like, man, at some point I was like, I don't think this is ever gonna happen. I was like, well, Netflix and them got the money there. Like, they hit me off and just say, forget it. And I started kind of losing faith that we ever gonna get it done. Cause his schedule was crazy. My schedule was crazy. And then last year I was part of New York Comedy Festival. I said, instead of us scouting a venue or whatever, I said, let's just bring the cameras in here. That was November the 9th. And I was like, still nervous about it. Cause I was like, this month I'm gonna cancel this one. But on fucking, what was it, 27th of this month, a new day dropped and I'm, I'm, I shot in November. I shot in November. Yeah. And I'm, I'm happy about it.  And like, we all in the same business. And lately, for some reason, specials don't feel like specials no more. You look at last special, it feel like somebody caught a check and they had to dump some jokes. They were tired of telling these jokes. Let me put them out here and get, and get the money. You know what I'm saying?  And what you get, like three or four of them a year. And then the HBO was behind it. You had dope promos for the ship. And now that it just feels like whatever it is in right now, that's who gonna get the special. It was like, just we need a woman with one tittie and half a leg. And you know, that's gonna be the special. It's like, what's in a moment? But I feel, I feel like. Yes. For a while, they were going after a lot of motherfuckers.  That was- You know what I mean? That's hypothetical, but it's gonna be a woman with one tittie and half a leg. I swear you was talking about it. It was on the council. Yeah.  Why he just saying, say your bitch's name? I knew he was talking about me. I knew he was talking about me. Nah, but I feel good about it. I feel good. Another reason I feel good about it because I've been doing it long enough.  So I feel like a new day, it was like an answer for all the people that's been following me. I got 30 plus years.   So I think that this special, not just, it wasn't just for me, it was just for people that's been following my career and be like, yo, I want to see him get the opportunity in.   That was Def Jam, that was the first. And then when I did Def Jam, I was doing comedy for six months. Damn. The way I got to audition, this is so crazy. The way I got to audition for Def Jam, Royale Watkins, good friend of mine, right? He was already signed under rescue communication. Bob Sumner was representing him. And Royale was ahead of me in regard. He been doing comedy longer than me. And one day he gave me, I said, I want to do a show with you. And he gave me his business card. I'm like, nigga, I didn't want to call nobody. I want to talk to you. He gave me his card. It was Bob Sumner, right? And I wasn't going to call Bob Sumner to book Royale. But what I did was, I took the number and I called Bob's office, right? Chrissy, she answered the phone. And I act like I already knew Bob. I was like, yo, this Donnell, where Bob at? Put him on the phone. She was like, who is that? I said Bob, well just tell him to call Donnell when you get a chance. Like I already knew the thing.  And I'll get him. She put me on hold, came back. Bob Sumner, I was like, yo, Bob, I just tricked your secretary. I know I don't know you. I got this card from Royale. I just want a shot to audition for Def Jam. He was like, well, can you come up to Peppin and Lounge on Thursday? I said, I gotta see if I can get off work. He was like, nigga, you got a job? He said, what type of comedian got a job? So I had to wait until I got off. I could get permission to leave my job. I went up to the Peppin and Lounge. And the Peppin and Lounge, if you don't know the history of it. Yeah, break that down because I always hear that from Bob. Oh, the Peppin and Lounge. The Peppin and Lounge, this is when it was Terminal D, those were two places for Black Commie. Peppin and Lounge was basically- It's in Jersey. Peppin Lounge is in Jersey. Terminal D where does- That was in Manhattan by mistake. I smoke a lot of weed. But then he hands me the joint. I thought that was the cue. Peppin and Lounge, Bill Bellamy used to host for it. And that was where you auditioned. If you could rock- If you could rock, yeah, that's what you did. That crowd was hard. If you could rock that crowd of Peppin and Lounge, then you could rock Def Jam. And in any given night, anybody could eat it there. You used to name some of the best comedians ever performed. They probably didn't took the L in Peppin and Lounge. It all depends on how the month was feeling that day. And I went up there. Royale was hosting that day. And I was nervous. I was a comic. I had probably five and a half months of experience under my belt, right?   They go hard up there. I want to say it's supposed to do like nine minutes. I was five minutes into my set. And then Royale came to the side of the stage and he said, Bob loves you. You got this show. I ain't take no chance. Who's he saying that? I said, good night everybody.  Right.   We learned that down here early. Six months. Six months I was doing. And then when I did Def Jam, I thought I had a okay set because the Def Jam era, if you had a catchphrase, right? Or you could have standing up and you had a phrase or something that resonated with people, the next day you was everywhere.  Pow! Pissed off man. Pow!  If you had that moment, you was selling out everywhere. I didn't have that moment. I just had, I thought was considered a mediocre set. In fact, I would have probably not made the cut if it wasn't for Michael Blackson. What happened with Michael Blackson? Michael Blackson was on the show. He's probably told us on some platforms. Michael Blackson was on the show. Michael Blackson, it was me, Sabor, J. Anthony Brown, Michael Blackson, Wyatt, the one man, Wyatt, myself, like four. On Def Jam, three people made the show. One person was going to get cut. That's just how it was. It didn't matter. Every show. Every show.  Just one? No, they would shoot. They shoot probably like four or five episodes a night. Everybody did. But the same crowd. Four people performed. One person was going to get the chopping block. Right. Same crowd? Same crowd. Same crowd. Yeah. One person was going to get the chopping block. And now I look at it. Michael Blackson, Sabor was on that show. J.B. Anthony, Wyatt, myself. Michael Blackson was on that show. Michael Blackson completely motherfucking annihilated this room. Where? Like, I'm going to tell you what happened. He ripped it. The nigga got greedy. He ripped it. They going crazy. They going crazy. Now he going for the killer killer. And he said, I'm an African. You know what that means? That this is a boy forever.  You want to see my big dick?   Big old rubber dick, right?  He'll tell you. They was already talking about Def Jam was like getting crewed. And they just like, he did that. And the crowd went crazy.  He'll tell you that story. They ain't even just cutting the joke. Can't cut it.  The editor's like, we ain't going to cut around that joint, son.  Yeah, I'm telling you. He'll tell you that story. That's right.  Had he?    The whole time.     He killed it, though. They lost it. The room was, like you said, it was. No, there was nobody funnier on that show than Mike Blackson.  He went for the, it was already, he was about to. He could have got off with what he had done. Yeah, he could have got off with what he had done, but he was going for the bop bop in a costume. Yeah, when you be, you know, you got sometimes.   He's positioned himself to be a favorite comic in the country. And he didn't let that motherfucking stop him. He kept going with it. Shout out, Mike Blackson. I'm gonna be on this show. So he didn't play Joe Sid. Yep. And my set was like, I did that going back to what you said. Made it work. I had two jokes when I first started. The Fat Tyrone joke. And I had a joke about people stealing the grocery store cause I used to be a security guard in groceries before I got this. And when I did that bit, it used to rip at home. The story is funny. And I was, I wasn't happy about my set. I saw Chris Thomas after the set.  He was like, what you talking about?  I was like, ah, he said, Donna, you got certain, he said, you got certain shows that resonate in the audience, but don't resonate in TV. He said, the sentence you had, it's gonna be one where people gonna look at it. They're gonna remember the character and they're gonna remember the story.   Def Jam was about standoffation, kicking it, falling out the chair.  Not that, but then we're not thought about it and laid on, people still remember it.  And half of them not even around no more.  Well, some of them, some of them. Not a lot of them. Resonance is on, but yeah. No, not a lot of them. Yeah. Not a lot of them. I'm saying in a certain capacity and I told this to every day, I just had my first special in Netflix. I'm 56 years old, right? I say at 56 years old, I feel like I'm about to blow up.  A lot of them can't feel that way. Cause they just, they hard can feel it, but they not in the position and they not working toward that and they not making the connections to get that. It's tough. Over 30 years? Yeah.  But now I feel like- What you don't think you blown up? Not to the level you want it. I don't think the, You trying to go up through that? I don't know. I don't really feel it, man.  If that make no sense, like I'm still a fan of it. I'm still, as long as I've been doing it, I'm still a student of it, you know? I'm not obsessed with like fame or anything. I'm obsessed with writing new jokes.  When I come back the next year, nigga don't hear the same joke he, I don't really, really, really connect with that. But I do feel something different with this special though. I feel like, you know, we all know talented people that don't get to look or don't get to equal platform or equal playing field. Shit, we been through like this motherfucker, he doing this now. I'm nice too, but it's who get the platform. You gotta be seen. Absolutely.   Yeah, a lot of them, it's a lot of talent that's just gonna be some great local talent cause they too lazy to lead that motherfucker and build the profile up and go be seen in the room. Work happens man.  You gotta go be uncomfortable. Yep.   You know what I'm saying? I'm at ease.  That's the first thing. I don't know what else to say. I don't know what else to say.    And niggas need to stop talking about what everybody else is motherfucking doing and go and do it and go do it. Niggas need to stop making motherfucking excuses. And I ain't talking about anybody in particular but it could be somebody in particular but motherfuckers. Who is in particular? Not anybody in particular. Hey, in particular? No, no, no.  In particular. But this nigga, nigga is in particular. No, in particular. It's particulars. It's particulars out here. They everywhere son. It ain't one nigga. It's a whole bunch of niggas that particular niggas that just talk and talk about what another nigga doing and don't want to do it theyself. Like motherfuckers.  What happened? I don't know what you're talking about.  I'm talking about particulars, man. I don't know who you talking about. I was talking about that particular. I was talking about all these niggas out here. And the funny thing about it. What you talking about? Okay, particulars in general. Just all around particulars. And usually these particulars, they talk about everybody else that used to be a particular. Cause you grow from it. They talk about everybody else. And these particulars usually go for the most successful motherfuckers. They usually go for the motherfuckers that's doing it. They usually go for motherfuckers that broke down walls for everybody. They usually go and do motherfuckers.  And they make excuses for those people. They make excuses. He got this because of this. He got this because he did that. And this is not anyone in particular, but this goes for the industry.    I'm saying going harder. You got two. I think I gotta say this because niggas be taking words and flipping them all. He did this. Let me he walk a walk a walk up and on. I'm thinking this, man. I'm just trying the world. Tell the world, though. You ain't got it. This is all I'm trying to say, man.  Can I say it any clearer than that? Guess how you can make it. Okay.  No, no, no.     I think so. That's what you gotta do. I think some of these motherfuckers going out there. I'm sick of all these niggas, son. I'm in here trying to be on call, man.   Jay-Z said it. Women lie, men lie. But numbers don't, niggas. Ha. No, I'm just saying, man, I'm sick of it. A nigga worked too hard, man. So what? So what? I don't know what you talking about, son. It is not one incident. It's these motherfuckers everywhere. You seen them. You seen them.   You seen them. It's these motherfuckers. It's these motherfuckers right here. Always making excuses.   If you look at most motherfuckers in this business that are really good, you could probably, Carlos, you could probably say, well, he didn't make it because of this or it didn't happen because of this. You could, of a life's choice, a lot of times it's drugs, right? A lot of times it's niggas get caught up in the bitches. You know what I'm saying?   They do this to Kevin. And I ain't here to defend him. I didn't do this to Kevin. They do this to Dave.  What you understand is, everybody's path is different. I can't let nobody say, when they say Kevin Hart is a plant and everything.   Kevin.   Wait a minute. No, he used to, one of his best jokes, he used to do this monkey. He looked little, so he sold it. I don't know he did like this or something. He sold it, right?  He had a joke and it was a monkey character and he did his hands like this and niggas went crazy.  They didn't know that this monkey nigga was going to be an international movie star.  That nigga would like this, he used to do the joke like this. He used to do like this stuff. And then he would run, I don't even, I don't know if he said, but he, I don't know if he said it, nigga. It was his joke, nigga. You look at me like, he might not want you to see it. I'm like, what?  He proud of, yo, he came up being that monkey, nigga. They didn't know him until he started being a monkey. Ask anybody, ask anybody, ask anybody, Kevin Hart's first joke, he was a monkey. I'm not saying it's his race. He was like this. He would do like this. Yo, he would do that. Y'all think, yo, he would do like this. This is what he did. Nigga, nigga, I'm telling you, this is what you do. Nigga, he would do like this. He would do like this. He would do like this, he'd do like this.  And then he'd do that again. And then he'd go back over in the corner like this. That's what he did.  Kevin. Yo, he did that. He would never do that joke ever again.  The monkey jokes. They gonna be like, yeah, I'll carry to you. The niggas like, when they get mad at him, on the jets, when they be on the jets and they get mad and jealous and like this. Yeah, we remember you used to do monkey jokes, nigga. I don't remember the monkey joke, but I do remember the ostrich joke. Here's the point. The point I'm making, they try to discredit a nigga hustler. The motherfucker had enough sense, he used to do this. The nigga used to commute from Philly to, they don't, this story don't tell people. He used to do the go hard rooms. Then he'd go do the mainstream rooms. He would mix it up. He used to come, I remember handing Kevin Hart $75 for a spot. And he didn't really do that well in the room. You know what I'm saying? Because his comment wasn't edgy like that. He didn't do that well in the room. But it was just like a brotherhood that we all had. The comedians from the DC area, Philly and all that. We all of us had rooms. We used to swap rooms. You know how it is. You go do a run. And I saw, this is what I'm saying, I saw his hustle, not just hustle for the streets. Not just hustle for the streets. Not just like I'm in these streets. He was in the streets, but at the same time, he was like, I'm gonna cross that street and I'm gonna go talk to the motherfuckers too. And that's what people understand. They can say what they want. Is it gatekeepers in this business? You motherfucking right. Is it people that block motherfuckers and motherfuckers right?  You ain't gotta, I'm not saying you gotta do what they do, but if you don't want to work within what this system is, then go do it yourself. These niggas keep talking about Hollywood.  Move, nigga. Go to the country.     And when you do that, and when you do that, guess what? When you do that, guess what? Hollywood comes to you. Hollywood came to country Wayne. Hollywood came to DC, Hollywood, that you can do your own.  I could make this about one person, it's not. It's a big adventure. You don't have to be out here. Yeah, and then at the same time, you can't knock a nigga because he know how to position himself. One of the things that broke Kevin was, and this was one of the most coveted things you could do as a standup, if you get invited to the Montreal Comedy Festival. That was it, you been there. Did you do new faces? Now, when you did it, it wasn't as popular as it was back then. It was like 2015, so yeah, it wasn't, because back then, if you was on new faces, you was coming out with a hold the deal. You left with a quarter million dollars. Yeah, you left with, yeah. You did, you did.  It was new faces in the Uptown. The Uptown, those are the two biggest ones. Monique was on the Uptown. Monique did the Uptown and her life changed. All executives, all these, the devils, as they say, they call them, all the devils.  If you're not gonna do it yourself, you gotta have to figure out a way to be able to communicate. You don't gotta sell your soul, whatever, but you gotta know how to navigate your way through that. Kevin came up, new faces, they saw them. But the thing was, with a lot of black comics, when I was coming up, they didn't want to go outside of their comfort zone. And what I mean by that, going to the comic strip, going to the cellar, going to these places, producers and fucking, that Hollywood wasn't coming to us.   Russell Simmons, Stan Latham, Bob Sumner.    David Letterman's show, you get one nigga, one nigga a year. Other than that, white boy, white boys. We created our own platform.  When I came in here today, I didn't know what to expect. I know the podcast, well and everything, it's like, oh, this song says it.     Yo, yo, yo, he said, you gotta come, dude, you a legend, I love you man. I was like, whatever, all right, I'll come, right? And then I came, son.  I was like, I'm sorry, nigga, here we back, son. No, but the point I'm making with everything that's going around, here's the thing, with all this shit, everybody like, it's so much beef and black comedy.  We all always been petty. We always been petty.   We don't go on the couch for three hours. I have a therapy session there. The funniest thing about that- Keep out of beef behind the comedy club, nigga.  Look, look, that nigga feet, never touch the ground.  Y'all, I'm just saying, y'all son, you y'all see his feet touch the ground?  But we always, we all, comedians, we always been petty. But we always left our beef behind the comedy club. Oh, we fought. Right. Yeah, yeah. That's why they- It ain't beef then. Yeah. Well, to fight, that's what we did. You know what I'm saying, if it's just verbal, it ain't beef. Man. That's just what comedians do. You know what, I'll tell you a story. Well, I remember years ago, at the Uptown Comedy Club, Dave Chappelle was there, Mike F. was there, and Tracy Morgan, right?  At that time, Tracy Morgan and Mike F. was at odds with each other.   And they was about to go to blows. We was on the back dock. We all sit back there. We talk it. They about to go to blows. And Dave came in the middle of it. This before he was the goat, right? Or whatever definition you wanna describe. And he said, yo, man, he said, I don't need to fight like that. He said, don't fight right here. And it happened to be a TV in the back, right? He said, y'all wanna fight, nigga? Fight on that. Fight on your career.   Keep eating them up. And when I do that, just keep dropping the mic on them. Women lie, men lie, men lie, but numbers don't. That's all you gotta do.  Pop, take that, pop, take that Netflix drop. Pop, take that motherfucking ranking, nigga, charting. You know that feeling? Charting, not on Netflix, charting. And when you chart, y'all was number one, right? When you chart, and we niggas, we going up against sci-fi shows. You know what I'm saying?   Millions. They spent a hundred and forty-eight per episode.  And here goes these 85 South niggas. What's they doing here? We there. That's how you prove it to motherfuckers?   So the other day, I'm in the office, man. It was a monkey, sir.   I was just saying. Because motherfuckers gonna go looking for my show then the whole show gone. Nah, man. I'm gonna call Kevin. It was a monkey, it was a kangaroo. It was a kangaroo.  But the point of that story was that everybody, this is the point I was trying to make, out of all these people that's in this cycle of comedians, beefing and what's wrong with y'all, the common denominator out of everybody that's even come up in this conversation where you bring sad names come up. Ricky Smiley name come up. All these names come up. The one thing that's in common is that all of them came from nothing. Zero. What, no silver spoon, anybody you name, it was no silver spoon and all of them came from nothing. Most of them from the hood and came from a place where them niggas had to work hard to get what they got. Man, it does. I guess that's comedy period, right? Everybody had to put in work somewhere and I guess it's for some reason.  We had to hit these rooms. You had to get up. You had to go somewhere, you know what I mean? Room, not no, not these rooms. No, you got to go somewhere where... No, the rooms that we came up on, it was rooms where... They don't want you to be there.  I ain't even saying nothing.   Tell the joke. They turn the TV off for you. Now these niggas mad. I did a T.I. room the other day. Yeah, Trap City.  Yo, when I do that room, it is a thing. Because some particulars under the impression that I don't know where the hard room is. I don't know any of that. I'm like, ugh. So part of me, my special had dropped. The day, my special dropped on the 27th.  I went up into that trap joint.  All right, thank y'all. Good night, I'm out of here. And you know what you're against. Like, I started having flags. I know, I was like, all right, this is how you got to work is wrong. I said, first off, you got Margarita machines going on over here. That's part of it. And these rooms are not knocking, not knocking, because the fact that there's a place where somebody telling jokes, always appreciate that. But a lot of places don't favor us. Like the stage, there wasn't no lights on me. You know what I'm saying? So now you're doing comedy in places that's not made for comedy. They made to be an atmosphere, a lounge, a kick and they, but they not set up for their comedy show. And that's what we thrived on down here. All them goddamn shows, lounge, ball and grill. You just at the end of the mic. Rest and run. You just at the end of the bar telling jokes.  I got too much goons.  Stepping on that little mat.  And then the mic key cracked in and out.   And you had to do it. And even that night, I felt like I was like, oh, not all, but I was like, man.  You can smell. But I didn't say it's just, it didn't be a hot sticky one the night. I didn't smell a grease. So they doing a good job in that kitchen. But it was just like the challenge. And sometimes I always do. I still go to the Grammy spots. And I'm saying, you want to test your armor and get grounded again. And that's how it was for me. And I went up there and smoked them next. You got to. I'm like that too. I'm going, I still get up places. I pop out places. Sometimes you regret it. What? Going somewhere.  Like. Man, you know what I'm thinking about as you say that all them rooms that I had to start from the ground up. Man, we built so many rooms. That first night where it be 11 motherfuckers. That next week it'd be seven. Oh yeah. Oh no. 21.  Then it fall back off to six. But then when it pops. Oh, it's Ignis. And you don't never know what and what and that's gonna. And they steady coming.  But the way you get it, what I used to do, I used to do the same room. I would start just like you say, it'd be like 10 people. And I would tell people, one thing I always did was make sure they had a hell of a show. I said, I want to make sure they had a type of show where they, that you would read you like, yo, I'm telling y'all, y'all should have been here. Y'all got to come. Like I tell them I had 10 people. Y'all selling like this. Yo, if y'all 10 people come back, bring one more person. I said, we had 20. Next thing you know, we're going to be gone. But the key to it, you still got to, you got to give them a good show. Hell yeah.  Man, taboo too.  I was like, oh, okay. And then you was.  And then it did. It kept going now.   Yeah. So these rooms that we used to do, it was because we had to, we had to create our own opportunity. And to what I'm saying. Money matters faster. What they say, black comedy, money come quicker. Yeah. But it's not as much as it could be if you do the mainstream side. But that's how it was when I was in, that's how it was when I was in New York.  Whatever they pay, it paid probably like four or five times more than the spot in the mainstream room. So you could like, the average comic that moved to New York, if you was popping, you could make enough, for the most part, you had a roommate. Hey, what's up Ricky? For the most part, I don't have no potato salad. She loves my potato salad. Ricky is super produced. I was just saying so many nice things about you. Absolutely. You were singing your praises. I was.  It's like the principle came in, like what are you here talking about? What I said, when you did those rooms... The money. How the money was different. So like, if you were living in New York, you got a roommate, you know, your cost of living wasn't that much.  It'd be a $20 spot here, a $25 spot here.  I can make fines over here. But what they didn't understand was, none of those people that could change your life was looking for talent that was never gonna go to those spots.  You had to know the people that other people had to know people and you had to go there. Yeah. That's what a lot of people did. A lot of people didn't do it and they struggled with where they are in their career now. When you go to those mainstream spots, like I was going and getting money from the black spots, but the mainstream spot, that's how you get into running for when it's time for auditions, for shows or whatever the fuck.  They recommend it because they know you coming through and they not like... Was the laughing score that for you? Before that. That was later. Yeah, I didn't know. I don't know that it's later. That can't be later. So like the mainstream one we had was the punchline. And that's how I got on last time of standing. But then we had to improv for a minute. But when we started, it wasn't nothing. There was no comedy club, bro. What stream it was? The uptown wasn't even back. It was no uptown. It was no... Yeah, it was a punchline and then it might've been some way up. Come punchline, just be scared of the uptown. Punchline was the only comedy club. They just be scared of the uptown. Yeah. That's why when people talk about rules and rough rules and stuff, we just like, you can't show us nothing. But they saying that like, he saying how motherfuckers were scared of uptown.  We was in that business before they had a liquor license.  You know how many motherfuckers we seen? Not one of us favored and do the Sunday.  That Saturday they getting paid at 3.45 in the morning. I know. And they let a million commas going. Oh, everybody going up. Everybody going up. Hey, but you better say something. Everybody going up. You can say something and get up out of it. Everybody going up. And I'm gonna say it now that it's over with.  Niggas then went out of town and got their feelings hurt and got shitted on. So when the nigga from Atlanta go to New York and then he got to go behind 51 motherfuckers. Of course, when you come to Atlanta, we from and put everybody. Oh, we knew. Yeah, it was, yeah.          Cause I was down there. I went to see Capone one night. And it was like one of them nights where they had all the terrible motherfuckers. And he was like, you mean it. He's like, man, please go up. These niggas is terrible. Sure, but that. When I got off stage and he said, thank you. That's terrible though. I'm the motherfuckers.  There's got heat and we gonna ride away but these people gonna have a good time all evening. That exhausted and just seeing them happy for a moment when you go up and then you know it's back to book. Like, you know what I'm saying? Unless you got a motherfuckers coming out. That's what I'm talking about. I stay away from them. You had them nights, but motherfuckers be bombing and then every so sudden they just start having bombing conversations. Oh, man. You know what I'm thinking about? Oh, the bombing. The bombing tears. The bomb committee. Yeah, yeah. They were rough.  I remember this one time somebody do a plate of chicken at me. I'm like, this is, get that conversation away from me. So I'm about to do my monkey joke. Get me out of here. Yeah, I ain't gonna, yeah. Why you got so many bombing stories? That's the crazy part. I'm all folks going back and forth.  But the crowd just hated them motherfuckers. That is them. You just got to deal with them. And then they never had a chance. I've seen it. We know. We know. Muse on the show. I've seen a nigga bomb and go back up and got booed again. Why did they let him go back up? He couldn't take, he could not accept the bomb. That's something I would have done. Man, let me do it over. I was like, nah, I'm gonna keep getting my bomb.  Let me get this nigga in a time loop. The first time I worked at Carolines, one of my good friends named Lou McGill, he used to work for Louis Ferranda. Louis Ferranda was the booking guy in the general. He ran the club. So he was telling Louis Ferranda, this guy from DC, I want you to see him, I want you to see him. And I was excited because I wanted to do the mainstream clubs. I already had the black clubs unlocked. And the reason I wanted to do the mainstream clubs because it wasn't like I want to be accepted, but I'm like, OK, where do the baddest motherfuckers perform? If the baddest motherfuckers perform in this club, I want to work this club. Not because, oh, I'm past, but like if y'all said it's the baddest motherfuckers. So he said I was going to do a showcase, right? Louis Ferranda was going to come and watch me. He don't never go watch. And Air Love and Dr. Dre, they had a hot morning show at the time, and they had a comedy night, right? And I wasn't auditioning for that. I was auditioning for Louis Ferranda, right? I started off wrong. I had pants with pleats. I wore pleated pants because I'm like this arm of the mainstream. So I had a shirt with a tie. But why do you wear that shirt on? Because the reason why, because I'm You didn't know who it was from? I didn't know that show. I just had a spot in Carolina. I didn't know it was the Air Love and Dr. Dre show, right? Man, I went out there with them pleats over it. With that tweed belt. I had a towel up here. Man, when I tell you the motherfuckers, let me have it. And then what it was, was I was doing clean material. I was doing clean. I did not pay attention to the room. You heard Air Love and Dr. Dre. But that name wasn't bigger than Louis Ferranda who booked the club. But you look at this shirt. The motherfuckers probably went up right before them.  Good night. They go, they did. You went up there. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. What the deal? It was a paperweight. I was so into trying to get passing that club and not doing what I was supposed to do.  And then all you had to do was hit one person and go, eh. It went, it did like this. Then somebody said, eh. They were hitting you with the same man. Now, here's the worst. They were doing cowbells. Eh, ooh. Right? Air Love had to come and grab the mic out my hand. He had to grab the mic. It sounded like a George Lopez thing. He had to grab the mic out my hand. You wouldn't get off? Then they hit him. This is the worst. When you get booed, you hear this. The DJ. And then the DJ jumped and go, ooh. What you saying? What you saying? Nah, son. Nah, son. Nah, son. I ain't going nowhere. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh.  They were saying, I said, a few words, please. Yeah. Ooh. They said, I said, shit, y'all can't, y'all can't step it long, and y'all can't do it. You give it to them.   And then they hit that. Ooh. Ooh. Hit the road, Jack. Yo. I went, I went mad. I was so defeated.  Yeah, I refused. I had to get off. Nigga had to grab the mic out my hand. I love it. At the end of it, he's talking about, yeah, nigga, you better tell him, you know I'm from D.C.   Cut to. 25 years later, Lewis Frander is the guy that I work with to do my special. That's crazy. You know, because he had to venue. It was Caroline's Broadway, their company. It could have been.  Hey, man, you need to come up here. You might have to hire these motherfuckers one day. Yeah. But I always, I always, I might gotta get y'all a job one day. Let's do it.  So I'm gonna put you on the newest type of shooting comedy. Me. And I always remind him of that story too. Not in a bad way, but just to see, just to see how the relationship changed. And I will say. You remember that.  No. He forgot about that. Oh, okay. And then I started working in a club. One thing I would say about that club is like every year they always grew with me when it came to money or whatever. And he was like, I was one of, I probably one of the only comments I used to work that show like twice a year. Caroline's, you do every, every year or every two years. And I used to have some concern. And I was like, man, I don't know. I was just there seven months and Louis was like, kid, you're funny. That's what he said. That's his tone too. He was like, kid, he said, you're funny. He said, we get a lot of, it's tours, walk-up, whatever. He said, people want to see a funny act. And I would come in there like twice a year.  And they always gave me more money. They always respected me until I grew to a relationship where we all partnered up and did a dope special. Yeah. Caroline's clothes, man, huh? Yeah. It's a ping pong shot. Yeah. And that's her. What? It's a ping pong place. They play ping pong down there.  I walked down there. I'm telling you, your heart just started pumping. When you walk down them steps, the steps are the same. They redid it, but you can still feel where the steps was and everything. When you go down there, and I talked to the bartender, I said, you, I know y'all could always feel somebody used to come when they walked down here.  And that was one of the, that was the premier spot to perform. And it goes back to like. So that's got to be a front. A ping pong shot.  Yeah. That's got to be. That's some, I don't want to put it out there, but. It don't look like no regular.   So it's not, I don't know. They probably do. Yeah, that's definitely. It probably is. Money London, bro. Yeah. Probably for the car. Tell us.  You know. Blue. Wall Street. The white blue folks. Yeah. Then I think about it.  It ain't that many ping pong players. We can't get jokes to pay the rent. We're going to get some ping pong balls. You know what'll work? Ping pong. Can we make the robot tell jokes? You need to try anything.  Yep. And you ain't about to go all over the world again.  Nah, I went to a couple places and I wasn't really a patriotic nigga like that. Yeah. You was a nigga. When they also talking to me about the military, they think I'm a Gorbik star, Gorbik. There you go. I was, got in to try to get kicked out. That nigga said I was not the most patriotic nigga. I wasn't. Most thing is in the military, not patriotic. Yeah. It's a job. Yeah. It's a job. No. It's a job. White people look at it as a duty. What they be doing? They be out there.  Give the man who died. They gave that truck.  That's to her and defend her still today. Cause there ain't no doubt. I love this land. God bless the USA.  Praise after that. Yep. We used to, when I was stationed, when I went to basic tech school in San Antonio, we had two places where you could, you would party. One was called Lackland, Arnold Hall, and Skylark. Arnold Hall was where the black people went, right?    They played that song. Yeah. And then white dudes, boy, that song, come on.  They best friends fighting each other. America!  White dudes getting drunk. They tongue kissing each other.   Grabbing each other's balls and everything.  That's why I got out to military. Not patriotism. I ain't patriotic. They tried to sell it there. They were doing it in the military. No, they do. No, that's out of the military. You're not patriotic. No.  Be patriotic.  Kick me out. What, Marshal?  Out of there? Yup. Yup. Four years of air force. And people really think that I was patriotic.  I told my folks, if you really thought that I was going to protect you and keep you safe doing a war, nigga. You got the wrong one. The wrong one. I don't know you ain't saving it. It's too late for them. Yup. You did a lot of people, bro. Four years in the air force. Air force, that's the deal.  You weren't going to have to get too busy. Nah, the people are, as soon as you say air force, people are like, did you fly a plane?   Or Thornton. Yeah, they don't just let, they ain't going to get no plane to no nigga. They ain't Donnie L, man.  Hey, look.    We don't know where the jet is. It's going to rain all night. $600 million. They let a real nigga fly it.  Hovering over your baby mama ultimate while she with that nigga. Every morning at 430, I'm just flying straight over the top of that bitch's house. Just enough time to hit the house.  She going to look like a honeycomb commercial where I'm coming through the air more. They arguing again. He flew past five times.  I don't expect you to just smooth off your house. Nigga, you better not get them parked that motherfucker in the middle of the street. Come on, Sad.  Yeah, he got about a hundred planes. They said it's time to pay everybody out of the airport. Oh yeah, in his back... A whole airport? Yeah. You know, he was flying the little remote and roll, but they said he couldn't have real...   You fellas leave too long. First of all, hey man.  You came in on the radar and fell asleep. You went way past the exit. That's funny. That's stupid, man.  So have you haven't had the opportunity to see special? Yeah. Tell him why didn't you watch it? Okay, if you were a fan of mine from back in the day of me doing Ricky Lake, back in the day being on the wire. Ricky Lake, how's she doing? She doing good. She had a couple of babies and her kids are grown now. I talked to her so often, but she just... Ricky Lake, that's something I'm going to consider. That was one of my crushes.  You should have picked Ricky was about that life. I bet she was. I knew she was about that life when she had the little short bomb cut. That's the universal cut. And if they color purple or something, they start with multiple black dudes. She had bump curls in the back. And they all drive Honda courts.  Next time you talk to her, tell her they're real niggas still. All the talk show motherfuckers. Ricky Lake, Jenny Jones. Sally, Jesse Raphael. Sally. You got the glass, man. Vanna White, you got to throw her in. Vanna White. Not much booty, but I wonder what it shaped like. That was on the song. How you getting a job on Ricky Lake, man? I did a... They used to do a... Another example of being in those certain places. There was a talent coordinator from Ricky Lake. And they said they wanted to add some comedy element to the show. What year was this? This was probably like 99, probably. No, about... 97, 98. Probably like early 2000s. Yeah, Ricky Lake. Yeah, when I was there. When I was on it. And I might be off by a couple years. But the thing is, going back to what I was saying about being in the places wanting to work these certain roles because that's where the talent... They went to flip for talent. They were trying to do like a panel of experts like in like relationships and stuff like that. And they had... They were showcasing the Boston Comedy Club. And this girl I know... I know it afterwards. But they had a showcase there. I auditioned for it, right? And then I got... And I didn't think audition was that good, right? And then at the end of the show, this girl came up. She said, this is the worst thing you can say to a comedian. She said, I thought you was funny.  Right. But I thought you was funny. Hey, don't forget them. Right, so... You made me laugh. She came up to me. Like, all I remember was a woman came up to me and said, I thought you was funny.  I didn't even pay attention to her.  Queen. She was usually queen back then. I was calling bitches, bitches. Right. I said, I'm sorry, Ricky. All right.  But I paid no mind.  They want me to do some comedy work on the Ricky Lake show. Right. So I went there and I was talking to this chick about comedy. She was talking to me about comedy, right? And she said, yeah, I remember one time I was talking to this comedian and I told him he was funny.  I know I'm funny. It was the same chick. Damn. The same chick. The one... I didn't acknowledge her that day that I did the audition. It was the same chick when I got the job. She was talking. And it just so happened that when I thought I had bombed that audition, it got me a gig on the show. Damn. And I was up there. It was me. And you called up bitches. He still hired you. I mean, it's how you pronounce it. It's the context. That's the whole though. It is. That's how I'm going to start. Just give me a job. All right. Get up and pray for me. Shit happened with Bob. I said, well, put that thing on the phone. She was like, here you go. So you didn't do that job? Yeah. You just went ahead and... I've been interrupting my whole career. People think I'm an interrupter now. Took a niche. I've been interrup... I started as a heckler. Damn. That's how you started comedy. I didn't start with the dream to be a comedian.  You was a real-life hater. I was a heckler. That's why that scared me. You know what I'm saying? That's why that scared me. You know what I'm saying? Wait a minute. I can't remember. I used to light niggas up. Listen. I used to light niggas up. I used to light niggas up in this club so much. People started coming to the club to watch me heckle. Hell no. I swear. Ask anybody. Hell no. Why do these niggas believe my stories, man?  So you was heckling. Yo, yo. I told you the truth while you were questioning. You sound like Shadow Shaw. You can't say that. Don't say that.  You ain't do that. You ain't. Don't say that. Don't say you're heckling. Don't say that. You ain't say that. I started. You ain't fans. No.  You got dessert. Niggas. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.  I'ma call. I'ma call. Hold on, y'all. I know you just died there.  Yo, yo. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Let this nigga answer the phone. Oh. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hello? Let this nigga answer the phone. Oh, let me direct your autobiography. This nigga direct you. Hello? When we do the move about you, let me direct your phone. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Let me get this. Because that's how it's thought.  Hold on. Wait a minute. Be quiet. This nigga I'm talking to now is a first motherfucka. I'm on the 85 South show right and I know your UC's nigga be acquired, but they want some secrets Right this nigga was the first motherfucker that put me on stage Mike How did I start? I Okay, I'm a backtrack. How did I start what I what I used to do before I first time I touched the mic What I used to do yeah, I used to do the people So he had people coming to the club just to see him heckle With no Mike, that's why I'd be yelling at niggas. I don't need a mic And and then I know when I got so cocky, right? I went to Raj He had t-shirts, baby. No, I ain't no t-shirt, but I tried to get a door deal though As a heckler digger Yo, I went to the seems to me Increase that's exactly what I'm saying Those are my words exactly, you know motherfuckers is coming to see me. I love like I was like this I told myself well, it looks like I've increased the business here by 30%. I said, I think it's time to cut me in They didn't believe it Mike the first time what heck to live what happened the first time I The first time I went on stage. What happened Mike?  I go back to what I used to do. Yo Wait, I'm gonna tell you that conversation was me and Tracy Morgan had that cuz Tracy Morgan used to heckle niggas too, right? So Tracy Morgan said we should go on tour Around the country just hit on these wacky. That's comedians side. I wash Mike you there I know I owe you a call man. I appreciate it because these niggas ain't believe me.  So you are sure underwear, right? What's the name of the podcast? All right, sure. Well, my man might watch it the first nigga to ever put me on stage. I appreciate that. Yeah, bleep that out All right, I'm a Nobody want the truth. So bleep bleep that I want the truth. I thought y'all said this was a year to truth They got a baby. No, we hear it You can't handle the truth told ya y'all try to question me son.  We didn't yes, you didn't you stood up We I walked away. No, you didn't like ah You said it was unbelievable. Yeah, no, we said, yeah Hard to believe that motherfuckers will show it up to see the heck of it. It wasn't it because it was Yo, anybody that worked the safe way back there No, they did people used to come because that what he didn't tell you about that story Mike worse worked for hostess cupcake company at the time, right? And he used to give us tickets at the safe way give away free tickets So that's where we started going. It was like, oh, we got a free ticket. We used to go there. So My job everybody my job.    No, I was You don't want the heat Money I was different. Yo, I had two jobs at the time and I used to travel. I mean, I love coming so much I remember there was a promoter there. He's the show and like when the show a bomb or did he make the money at the door? I had two jobs. I was I thought I was I was I used to help him pay the comedians I'm the next one. Yeah, man. I need that.  Here you go, man It's where you didn't boot them off stage.  He said down there. I'm so proud of you Well, he talked about the special he saw I'm so proud of he said where you came for he said man I don't know if this sounds crazy.  That means you don't call them a lot yo, but this is and this is like this is where you know we shot it twice right and The first set this would a producer say to you they'll say They don't even move they walkie-talkie or nothing.    I was like I was like I got something else to do I it wasn't bad, but she likes me in a certain capacity. She knows when I'm Doing a certain thing and I did I knew I didn't hit it. It was okay.  I was like, she better come in with some doubles. You better come in with some doubles You came in that joint them joints was like this It was deep it was super devils. I was like we got him She didn't have to say nothing. She'd be like this and then she walked away. I was like I got the temple That was good, but the point I'm making Well for this for me if this special like 15 or 20 years ago Like when you know you want something to make your mark of people to know you from it would have been a different feeling They would have been like oh man if I do this people get to know me or whatever But it's a lot of people that know me already, you know Sam But this one this special it really feels like it's for the people and the worst thing you can do With a special is to try to figure out how funny it was because funny is subjective To what style you like the hardest thing if you deal was like is it funny enough? I think they're like this and I had to remove myself from that and I told myself what I want. I Said the thing that I like about this. I said it feels good the special feels good and we talked about earlier how Comedy's fucked up this special feel good like three weeks before we drive today told me said don't help I think your special is gonna be a breath of fresh air, you know when you watch a new day You don't see nobody a guy up there trying to dog nobody you don't see a guy trying to expose nobody You don't see none of that you see a guy that just want to have a good time is and to talk about Relatable stuff even the subject matter talk about this who don't have a goddamn co-parent to the story You know I'm saying who hasn't been in a toxic relationship. You know I'm saying who don't have issues with dr. Whom are Whatever we'll talk about that on another episode, but I'm just saying I talk about he was one of them particulars Well, I went not a bad way Not a bad way.   You can say so I'm doing monkey joke. That's how you gotta Let me that's why they put them in jumanja.  I don't call nobody man. Kevin.  And didn't have a monkey joke. If she can say ooh, I, I, I would die.  Nah, he did a, I don't know. I don't can't remember. I know that he did a bit.  This is done out of telling the story. A monkey jokes. Yeah, this is true. His was ripping though. You couldn't follow his. He had deep monkey jokes. Digger what? Big dropper. He can drop that mic.  How'd it go? Hell no. You had to beat it. I hope you have.  Just rewind it.  He been trying to bury that joke forever. Now you didn't brought it back to that.  No, you're telling a story. Walk, walk, walk, walk, walk. You're telling a story. That's not a bad story.  I'm just saying. And think about it. Look, you can really go deeper. It's... You did a monkey joke. And then look at the evolution chart. Shit. You know what I mean? Think about it, nigga. Y'all don't want to think of it, nigga. No. Think about it. The evolution chart is starting like this. It didn't, nigga, stood up and became a man. Am I right? I'm too deep for y'all to understand. I'm telling y'all. Because if that was the case, it wouldn't be no more monkey. Wait. Kevin, you said Kevin's part is gonna make monkeys extinct? I ain't saying nothing is a part, man.  No more monkey in the round. See, you... You know what I'm realizing now? You know what I'm realizing? What? The parent show, Hater Ball. Uh-huh. That was... That's your life story. What? Yeah, you was really the Hater... Bro, you was already a baby. Do you know another thing about that? We... That's you? The story, that joint. This how much of a Hater... The Hater's ball, playing ball. This how much of a Hating skit it was. Sketching. I asked Neil Brennan. I asked him. I said, So what's the next sketch I'ma be in? He said, Player Hater's ball. I was like, cool. So the next day, I look at the casting sheet for the next day. For what was going on the next day. And I see Player Hater's ball. I don't see my name on the paper. I'm like, I thought you said I was gonna be in it.  I forgot B. That's the white person being cool. They say the word B. They say, Yo, they got one word to make them black. Bro, dog, any of that, right? He said, Oh, I forgot B.   So he was like, I don't know B. He was like, just come up with something. That's what he said. He said, I don't know. Just come up with something. And I was like, I gotta come up with something. I was like, Ooh. Then I get to build my own character. Right? At the time, I don't, my hair don't grow. We all know that. I'm in right in the middle Chico got braids down his back.  What?  Yeah, just Stevie Wonder. It's a DC thing. It's a DC thing. Stevie Wonder braids start right here, nigga. Yo.  Izzy, she love it. Throwin' them up. That's why he be lookin' up. It ain't nothin' to do. So he said, he said, I don't know, come up with something. So I was like, every character I play, it's always me, just a bald guy. I said, but I want to do something different. I said, I want to get some hair. I'm built, like build a beard. I'm buildin' a character.  I said, I caught hair, makeup, or props or whatever. I said, I want a wig. I want a cherry curl wig. Right? I said, I want like a soul glow joint. Right? Nobody knew what I was doin' that night. Right? So I want a soul glow joint. Then I went to the props. I said, I want a, but I want it in a champagne glass. Right? I mean, a champagne bottle. Like I want to be squirt. They was like, that's gonna be too sloppy. We can't do that.   Right? And then I, Five Heartbeats is my favorite movie. I said, I want to dress like Eddie Cain. Right? If you look at that suit, if you look at the suit, play this ball. If you look at it, you put it up against Eddie. Oh, night like this. The hang. Soup. I know y'all believe nothing. I say, you don't believe this story. You want to call a wardrobe. I said, look at me like you believe me.  I just did everything. No, no. You started as a heckler. I was so scared to trust you now. Right now. So I look, this is, this is the story behind that. So I get the can. Right? I go, I went to wardrobe with me and them. Whitney Keer. She does wardrobe for, for, for a BMF.  I got the, I got the, I got the motherfucking wig on. I'm doing like this. And they get mad.  Everywhere I go. They like, come on, man.  I'm like, I'm practicing.  I'm like this. Cause on that show, I realized they didn't give me a lot of words. So anything, any character, whatever I created, I had to punctuate it with strong comedy. Everything I did was for a laugh. I was like this, nigga, when I squirt, them niggas gonna laugh. I was like, they didn't let, they not let me talk that much.  I'm walking around.  I mean, queens. The queen bitches are laughing at me. Right? The real bitches get it. Yeah.   It's funny. And I'm walking around. I'm not on the script. If anybody got that rigid script, the character is not on the script. He does not exist. I'm walking around.  I'm like this. God damn. I said, I said, I was like, you start laughing. I said, what's my name? You said, I don't know. Make up something to be. I'm like this. Go past the mirror. I look in the mirror. I did like this. I said, I feel beautiful. I feel beautiful. I feel beautiful. Beautiful. The nigga named, I named him beautiful. And then I walked past there. I said, I got a name. He said what I said, beautiful. You don't look it. They were so disrespectful. This is another script. We never got on there. We had one script. We scratched. It was, it was a player. We was going to go back in time. Dave was going to go. This was, this was a sketch. They showed a clip. Yeah. They showed a little clip. What it was, was he went back in time to smack my mother for naming me beautiful.  And they can slap my mother. That never, that would never air. That's crazy. But that's how it was. If you look at it, if you look at it. So y'all was really hating on each other all day. There was some funny motherfuckers in there, man. No, but if you look at it, if you look at that, the way it's cut, you see me yell out something. Yeah. You hear me yell out something, but you don't see me. If you notice when all of them went up there to talk, I didn't get, I didn't talk. I had the, I had the bow guard when the, when them niggas was quiet, we'd be upset. I'd be like this, man. Ain't nobody, ain't nobody say cut yet.   I was getting last, nigga. The only way you say it on that show about getting laughs, when we did the Rick James sketch, because they know I just be blurring out, I'm just gonna be like, I'm like, this is the worst thing if don't nobody say, no, I'm gonna keep doing it.  But when I would throw some, it, it would work. We did the Rick James sketch. It was Charlie. was Charlie just at the bar, we were at the bar. What did the five fingers say to the face, right? I said, Neil, they ain't mic me. He said, you not saying nothing, they're not gonna give you no mic. I said, but what if I want to say something? He said, nah, I'll be.  I made sure I was like- Just don't say something to me anyway. No, but I didn't say it. Just mound it.   But if you look at it, I'm like, I see it. And I made the camera, if you look at that shot, I made the camera go to me, I made the camera go to me.  I just hang out. So you was just showing up and like- At the time I wasn't making no money, I was like, I get free food, I get to learn something, and them niggas would be like, yo, you want to jump in this? Yeah. There's so many sketches, it just so happened that I was just hanging out. The Wayne Brady sketch, when I get shot at the end, I was just hanging out, free-loading. What happened with your jacket at the end? Here goes another thing, that was a one-take joint. Man, I used to go so hard on that show. Yo, that month for first off, Neil came out of nowhere, he said, yo, you want to get shot B? I'm like, ha, ha, ha. I didn't know what it was.   Another thing when people don't know, anytime you saw real niggas around me, it was real niggas that be around me. My niggas, I was giving my niggas jobs. Anytime you saw real niggas, it was real niggas. It was 40 of them. It was Brooklyn Mike, it was my dudes. I'm like, nigga, come and get this money, get this free food, and you get to do something. So I pulled the niggas out. I was like, stand right here, niggas, stand right here. Those two niggas that was beside me on that sketch, it's my niggas. One of my steel fuckers, one of my sims, whenever, but they my dudes, right? It didn't, I was like, man, I said, yo, we don't know what this is gonna be. I said, just follow my lead.   It's Wayne Brady's son, and I did like that. I ran over here, when I grabbed the thing, my arm got caught. Yeah. The jacket got caught. Yeah, that's what I know. So I swing, and then nobody say cut, nigga. So I just kept doing it like this. And they said, that was one take. They said bloop, and they was like, that was it. Yeah. That was how I know it. That's true. I know it. I used to cast on that show. I used to cast. So you pulled the people in? All the comedians. I would look at the script. Whenever I saw, and I knew cast of people, whenever I saw background, like street walker chicks, I'd be like this, bitch, I got you some work. But where, I'm telling you, I would look at that. I mean, I didn't cast nobody talk, you know. Right, but when they said background, they got a little money for the date. It's another thing, one of the bitches, and not like that. What up? She blew up. This is a real story. Which one? Let me tell you. Slow down, nigga. Oh, now you want to pay attention. I thought it was the one. Now you want to pay attention. Now we're engaged. No, I thought it was the one with the titty cat in my mouth. I thought it was. I got her. Okay.  That was one of my bitches.  No, nigga, it was for the joint. You tried to hit her, I recruited her.  Okay. Boom, we got her on. On it. And the scene on the Wayne Brady joint, right? First off, they had this one scene. It was like women of the night, like street walkers were, right? So they had all of these women that was like trained, classically trained and everything.  Then they say, cut. They put this stuff on like, well, I don't really want to do this. I, I much better this. One of my friends, she was a real dancer. Her name was Pearl. I got her to gig on that joint.  Right. She was, she was trying to make it rain.  She was like, hey, how y'all doing? Ready? Throw me some. So it's a camera set rolling, you eating fish? Right now? I'm not. I wanted some of these french fries. So.  That's all I'm saying. But she, I can't believe. She went, she went up. The one thing she went from, she was a played woman of the night. And she, she made everybody come to her. They was waving her and stuff. And then she got, she's the one that says, hi Dave. I like, I don't even remember. And then she said, hi Dave, I like a new show.  She used to be a dancer. Okay. And I got out of that spot and she blew up in the clubs.  You had one scene. But she done freaked it. Yeah, but she did. And they knew her. Like they was fast. But now she's like, she's a body-building now like world, world training body-building. It's a million stories from that show that a lot of people don't know about. Amen.   Come on man. Come on man. Where's Darnell? Nah, I'm just... Thad?  It's Darnell, this ain't Darnell. I hope, please. Yeah, man. Look man, tell everybody to check out a new day. You just did. Everybody check out a new day man. It's a new day, it's a new dawn, it's a new life for me. Birds flying high, you know how I feel. Breathe, drifting on by, you know how I feel. It's a new dawn. It's a new day. It's a new life for me, yeah. It's a new dawn, it's a new day. You ain't never been on a singing. Stop hating. Ooh. Paul, you monkeys watching this? And I'm feeling it.  We out of here. Let's have a picture, man. Oh yeah, it's crazy. Let's go, let's go. This is the truth, that nigga had a monkey beard. Amen.