What's going on everyone? Sam here with late in sports cards and I am ripping one box of 2021 Leaf Trinity baseball hobby for Christopher A. So good luck Christopher. See what we got in here for you man. Get six autos per box. Hopefully something good would be really cool. Love seeing some of the big name prospects come out of here. That's always fun. These are significantly easier to open than their counterparts the Jumbos which is good. Empty and empty. First up we've got green Leaf Trinity rookie that is Chase Petty. That is 19 of 75 on the Chase Petty. Nice one there. We've got next up is blue Alejandro Hidalgo, 19 of 99. Again the Leaf rookie. A cool one coming up here. Got 42 of 99 on the Trinity clear. Blaze Jordan for the Red Sox. Nice Blaze.  He's going to be a stud for them. There you go. Grats on that one Christopher. Got 34 of 99. That is Marco Luciano for the Giants. Nice Luch on the Trinity clear blue.  We've got number two 99 on the RPA. How about Brendan Beck? The sick patch on that one. Part of anniversary in that one. That's cool. Oh nice one to end it. Nice hit there. Last hit of the break. One of five. Trinity clear Max Muncie autograph. Congrats on that one Christopher. That is again the A's Max Muncie but nonetheless still a great player to pull right there. Congrats on that one man. That's awesome. A little bit of the hat mojo right there for you Christopher. Thought I'd do it for your break there Christopher. Congrats on all the hits. Get those right out to man. Thank you.


you for waking us up this. Thank you for your loving kindness that you showed us this last past week. Lord, thank you for the privilege that you've given us to come into your house today to praise and to worship you. We ask that your shekinah glory fall upon our hearts. Hallelujah. Lord God, receive our praise and our worship today. Meet us here as you met the Samaritanister to our hearts. Lord God, receive our praise and our worship. Annoying every portion of this service on today will forever worship and praise you in Jesus' name. Amen. We're going to be reading from Psalms, 23rd Psalms. Amen. Amen. We should all know that one by heart. Okay, ready? Yes. The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastor. Yes, Lord. He leadeth me besides the still water. He restores my soul. He leadeth me in the path of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, so I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. I would fear no evil for thou art with me. Thy rod and thy staff thy comfort me. Thy prepares the table before me in the presence of mine enemies. Thy anoints my hand with all. My cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. That's the word of the Lord. Amen. Hallelujah. What a promise we have in the Lord to be able to dwell in his house forever. Amen. Hallelujah. We're here to lift up the name of Jesus this morning and give him all the glory. I'll never forget Lord God. Hallelujah. Hallelujah.  He's so kind and merciful unto us. Hallelujah. And he even promises us that one day we will be with him in eternity. Hallelujah. The word of God describes it so beautifully. And this was one of brother Edwards. It was his favorite song. Hallelujah. He loved this song because he desired to be in the presence of the Lord and that's what we should be seeking for. That's what we should be striving for is to be in God's presence. Amen. Amen. Hallelujah. I can only admit when I see what it will be like. Hallelujah. When I walk by your side I can only imagine what my eyes will see is before me. I can only I can only imagine surrounded by what it will be larger when that day. Bless the Lord. Can you imagine to be on the streets of gold to be in the presence of the king? Amen. Take a seat if you can. And we want to recognize all of our visitors that includes anyone that is not a member or hasn't been here for a long time. We just ask you to stand so we can recognize you today. We're just so happy to have you. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. We want you to know that you are welcome to come and to worship with us at any time and we are so honored that you took the time to come and to worship with us. Amen. Take your seats. Go give my hand if you will saints of God.   We don't take that for granted. Right now I'm going to have minister Amber wise. She's going to come and she's going to bless us. Then after that our bishop is going to come and bring us a powerful word. Amen. Amen. Greet them as they come in Jesus name. And I can only imagine. Amen. There's so much going on in the world today. Amen. And how many know it's such a privilege and an honor to serve the Lord today. Amen. Keeps us safe. And he just provides for us. Amen. Worship us. We sing this morning.  That's my testimony. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. I was lost and undone but Jesus came and he claimed me as his own. I'm so glad. So glad. Words can't express my vocabulary. Certainly can't express how great God really is. But our testimonies thank the Lord for the anointing on the service. Amen. God visit us. He comes to us and he encourages us. He leads us. He guides us. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. Thank the Lord because he helps us to understand what he requires. And when the requirements are set forth, we understand we don't have to do it all by ourselves. Hallelujah. Thank God that he walks with me. He talks with me. He directs my path. And he tell me not that this and I thank God that he is such a wonderful Savior. I'm excited to see each of you who are here today. I thank the Lord for those who are visitors. And I thank the Lord especially for my nephew. Amen. Amen. Michael Sykes. Amen. The Lord is good. He's looking good in New York. Amen. God is good. Glad to have him here. I'm glad to see the Adams also. Amen. The Lord bless you. God bless you. Let's see. Who else? Who else do we have that I'm not mentioning? All right. Maybe that's all the visitors. All right. I'll go up. Go ahead. All right. If a visitor doesn't wish to be acknowledged if they, you know, let's say a prerogative. I'm not saying there's anybody who's in that. That's just my position. All right. The Lord is going to speak to our hearts today. I thank the Lord because he loves us. He loves and he has great compassion upon us as we struggle through these last and evil days. And I've heard down through the years, oh, my musicians, let's say hallelujah for our musicians. Amen. Our musicians are on top of it. And I thank the Lord for them. Amen. The scripture said, play skillfully on the instruments and that they do. All right. The Lord leads us and guides us and he gives us strength to go on the rest of the way. We often say I've come too far to give up now. That's right. That's right. I've been walking with Jesus for a long time. I've been tested and tried for a long time. And I'm glad to say I'm not tired yet. Amen. Not tired yet. Not yet. And I don't expect to get tired before this journey is over because I am a child of the King and he's my daddy. And he loves me. So I'm delighted to be in the Kingdom of God. Let me call your attention this morning still to Ephesians chapter number two. This is one scripture. This passage is one that is very dear to me. It helps us understand who we are, where we come from and what another can do to assist us in our journey. As we travel through this land singing as we go pointing souls to Calvary to the crimson flow, many arrows pierce my heart from without within. But my Lord leads me on through him. I must win. I'm determined to win the race this morning. I brought my old Bible. I brought my old Bible and I'm going to take some of the notes out of my old Bible and the Lord is going to speak to us. And he's going to help us. He's going to satisfy our soul. In Ephesians chapter number two, this is a very familiar passage. I'm going to read into your hearing down through verse 10. And then I'll go on from there. All right. Now this is this is the apostle Paul writing beginning at verse number one. And you have he quickened who were dead in trespasses and sin, wherein in time past you walked according to the course of this world according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience. Now he said two mouthfuls right there. He said you're in a different place than where you started. You started out you were born in sin shaping an iniquity, didn't love God, didn't love his people, weren't anxious to do the right thing. He said but wherein time past he walked according to the course of the world. He said now you're in the body of Christ. He said but look back over your shoulder and you'll see how you were no better than all the the rank centers there. And you lived according to that, to the prince of the power of the air who was the devil. He said among whom verse three went to whom also we all had our conversation in time past in the lust of our flesh. Fulfilling the desire of the flesh and of the mind and were by nature the children of wrath even as others. He said you would like all the rest of them, all the rest of the sinners. You were no different. You couldn't control yourself or you wasn't willing to control yourself just like everybody else. He said you was jacked up from the floor up. You needed some help. He said and so I I quickened you and when he says quickened he said I gave you life quicken is the light. Verse four, but God who is rich in mercy for his great love wherewith he loved us even when we were dead in sin had quickened us together with Christ by grace ye are saved. He said when you didn't care about God and you were living in a worldly atmosphere and going along with the gang God has rich mercy but God who in who is rich in mercy he's not staging a mercy he's got plenty mercy pause here because sometimes even in the body of Christ perhaps someone will make a misstep. They'll miss the mark sometimes the other soldiers in the army will catch one who's down and kick it won't let him up have no mercy I knew they wasn't doing right all the time so God has mercy. He has he shows us mercy. Now if you can't give mercy you can't receive mercy. Blessed are the merciful. Blessed they're happy. Let me get them back but God who is rich in mercy for his great love wherewith he loved us even when we were dead in sin had quickened us together with Christ by grace or you saved. He said now you're saved.  He said by grace ye are saved and has raised us up together and made us to sit together in heavenly places in Christ.  You didn't bring salvation to yourself. You can't get salvation without going through Jesus. So he said he sent to you saying to us that we belong to Jesus. We need to understand that we need him every step of the way. The songs that the praise team sang this morning some of them just fit so so well and I like the one when they got to Jesus I'll never forget what you've done for me. Jesus I'll never forget how you set me free. I was bound in sin and I couldn't help myself in spite of the fact that I tried to behave. I tried to stay out of trouble but it just wasn't the art of the day for me because I needed somebody to help me. It was more than I could bear and Jesus knew when he saw me that you're not capable of being a challenge for the devil. He said I'll help you. I'll strengthen you. I'll give you what you need to persevere. He had raised us up together and made us sit together in heavenly places in Jesus, in Christ Jesus, that in the age to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. For by grace are you saved? Through faith and that not of yourself it is the gift of God. Not of works, let's any man should boast while we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus unto good works which God has before ordained that we should walk in him. It was foreordained that you would line up. You were born with a purpose and you couldn't fulfill your purpose until you lined up with the Word of God and that's by receiving the gift of his spirit. The gift of his spirit is I like to say it like this, when you see a person laying on their dying bed and they're still breathing and finally they go, that's the spirit leaving. But see the Lord wants his spirit to be in us because he claims us. We're his family.  In the second chapter the Jews were, they had it in for the Gentiles and they say they can't be saved because they're not circumcised. So they set their standard as to what God was requiring and they ran back and they were sure that that was the truth. So now this is the foundation I just read for you. Now I want to, okay, I want to begin to emphasize some things over here beginning at chapter, I mean verse number 11. It says, well, I missed his one point. Well, we are his workmanship in Christ Jesus unto good works. What that verse right there says, you are God's project. He says, I'm going to take a sinner and I'm going to put my spirit in them and I'm going to work on them, work on them, work on them, no matter what comes, no matter what goes. I'm going to work and work and work. They're my pet project and I'm not going to stop working on them till they become perfect. Come on, how about that for an assurance? The Lord said I'm going to work on you when you make a misstep. I'm going to say get up from there and keep going. He said, I'm going to give you courage. I'm going to give you strength. Because you are my pet project, how about it's good to be a pet project of Jesus Christ the righteous. Hallelujah. That makes me feel good. Sometimes I'm not satisfied with who I am. I know the rest of y'all perfectly. Sometimes I don't feel like I, you know, I don't feel like I got it made perhaps like somebody else would. And I know that I can lean on him. I know that it is promised to me that he's going to keep working on me. He's not going to ever forsake me. He'll never let me down. The only way we can become a part is I got to leave him and I ain't leaving him. I'm holding on to God, so change your hands. He's everything to me. Hallelujah. Amen. I got a baby clapping back there. Praise God. Hallelujah. Verse 11. Wherefore, remember that ye being in time pass Gentiles in the flesh who are called un-circumcised. But that which is called the circumcision is the flesh made by hand. He said, God didn't do it. The flesh did it. That at that time ye were without Christ being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel and stranger from the covenant of promise having no hope and without God in this world. Now that's scary. When you find yourself in a position where you have no hope and without God in this world you in bad shape. I can't imagine how it must be. See the Lord brought me out a good while ago and he put me in the family, but I can't imagine how it must be to try to get through this time that we live in in this society and have any kind of hope. When I get in trouble I got somebody to call on. Come on somebody and you know the thing about it is in this situation like that when you get in trouble you don't have to start a prayer almighty and everlasting God. Now who are willing to more willing to listen than us to pray? No, no. When you get in trouble all you got to do is say Jesus! And when you call his name he's right there. You get to know that he's right there beside you all the way and that's a comfort to know that there's nothing that can come against you that's going to cost you to lose out. You just hold on to God's unchanging hand. Hallelujah, hallelujah. Now they were separated from God the Gentiles separated the the Jews separated the Gentiles from themselves and they put up a barrier from God where Gentiles and uncircumcised people could never get to God. That was their theology. Thank God. We were without Christ and we were aliens from God's people who was Israel and so an alien is one from another country who has no right in the present country. He said we were strangers from God's covenant and promises. We had no claim on what God had to give to mankind to ease their situation. We were without hope without God. Then verse 13 comes with that great conjunction but but now in Christ Jesus ye who sometimes were far off are made nigh by the blood of Christ. Come on somebody. He said he said what used to be an obstacle for you when the Jews refused to let you in anybody know about wanting to get in and you can't get in no kind of way and you're looking you say seem like it's a little open slot right there I'll ease through that and when you get to there you they had a barrier up but verse 13 said in spite of what they were doing in spite of the barriers that were before you he said but now in Christ Jesus you who sometimes were far off are made nigh and it was by the blood of Christ. Oh thank God for Calvary thank God that he cared enough thank God that he saw our plight and he was willing to help us and so he got off his throne wrapped himself in a human flesh and he said I'll be what is needed for every mankind not just the Jews he said but it'll be for worldwide everybody on the face of the earth hallelujah so he wrapped himself up and he came on down and he said I'm willing to pay the price for your sins your sins your sins your sins your sins he said I'm willing now I can't imagine that Jesus was just up in heaven on a picnic and thought he would extend extend his picnic down on earth it was a great great emotion for him to even come down he had to wrap himself up in sinful flesh in human flesh and he was willing to pay the price from my salvation at this point when the praise he was singing I'm a witness the Jesus will make a difference in your life I can testify to that I said I can testify to God God opened doors made ways saved spirit my life all kind of stuff and like I said before we don't even know how to praise him like he ought to be praised because we don't know what all he's doing when we're acting crazy and and thinking we're all right and he said I'm gonna hold on to you I'm not letting anything take you out I'll be a shield against the adversary of your soul he said you can be sure I've made a promise that I'm gonna bring you through I made a promise you're gonna be all right hallelujah and so I'm a witness that Jesus make a difference in your life hallelujah I've been walking with Jesus and I've not regretted it not one day come on somebody yes tests and trials will come your way and people will put all kind of obstacles in front of you trying to prevent you from getting over and when they find out you're a child of God they say oh I got one here hallelujah amen I can witness to that I have that testimony three intelligent fellows want to take me to lunch when they took me to lunch they start questioning my philosophy on religion they start talking all kind of foolishness and I let them talk because it didn't bother me amen the Lord gave me the strength and the wherewithal and I witnessed to them and then one of them came back for another dose and I told him I said you're really a nice guy I sure hate to see you go to hell I'm confident in where I stand there's no question in my mind whether I've got it right or not I've got Jesus and that's enough for me because he can make everything all right I count on him and I found that I can trust in him in his word and he never fails he's never failed yet not yet hallelujah and he ain't gonna he can't fail hallelujah thank you Jesus but now in Christ Jesus you who sometimes were far off are made nigh by the blood of Jesus he said you were way off base in your theology in your self satisfaction about how you're doing you're preparing yourself well I'm much better than Susie way better than Johnny but that ain't the standard that's right that's not the standard holiness is the standard living free and separated from sin is the standard hallelujah for for he is our peace Jesus is our peace who have made both one and have broken down the middle wall of petition between us now when Jesus died on the cross the petition between between the holies split from the top to the bottom and what that meant that now everybody who wills whosoever will let him come let him come there's no barrier now it's broken down you can get to Jesus by yourself you don't have to go to the priest or the preacher or whatever you need to go to Jesus come on somebody you can go to Jesus by yourself having a abolished in his flesh the enmity even the law of commandment contained in ordinance or to make in himself of twain one new man so making peace yeah so Jesus began to make a new man he said far far to make in himself yeah of twain he said I got two I'm gonna make them one and by making them one there will be peace now thank God for the peace you know I I could say some of those might have split personalities and the law says I want to make you one I don't want you to struggle with yourself I don't want you to to wonder if you're going crazy or have gone crazy he said whatever the confusion I find in you I want to bring it together I want to make it one yes thank God for Jesus who's able to do that yeah and he said you want to make it one that he might recon reconcile both unto God in one body by the cross having slain the enmity thereby he said I'm going to go to the cross he said what a gift for you what a help that you're receiving because I'm willing I have the power I have the knowledge he said all knowledge it comes from me he said and so you don't have to worry about it he said because I'm gonna do what I need to do in you if you let me come on somebody and that he might reconcile both the Gentiles and the Jews unto God in one body by the cross having slain the enmity thereby all that mankind would be willing to surrender all that they would lose their pride all that they would surrender their life unto the king of kings and the lord of lords what kind of world might this be can't imagine it can't wrap my head around that but that was what what Jesus called himself to do he said I'm going to take it on myself and I'm going to go down I'm going to give my life shed blood for their sins and reconcile them bring them back if they'll come he said and it and came and preached peace to you which were a far off and to them that were nigh now he came and preached to people who were way way off that meant in my mind that meant to me that he preached to people who didn't have a clue about what was to take place didn't have a clue how they could be set free they just knew they were bound but didn't know what to do about it he said and there were some who weren't in that category but they were near come on somebody near is not enough so he preached to them he preached to everybody song came to my mind is draw me nearer nearer blessed Lord to the cross where thou hath died draw me nearer Lord nearer blessed Lord to your precious bleeding side help me to get close enough to you that I realize and I understand what that meant to me and my situation when the blood came streaming down when they pierced pierced your hands and your feet were nails at Calvary help me to appreciate and know that that's what will will help me to come to you last verse for through him we both have access by one spirit unto the Father so now Lord make us one this is my prayer Lord make us one Lord we don't need division Lord there's enough trouble much in this world there's many tests and trials that we don't need to go through but Lord you help us make us one bring us together cause us to to embrace one another if we can humble ourselves I'll say probably the greatest thing that needs to happen is is we need to understand what the scripture said man ought not to think more of himself than he ought and so sometimes we're walking around thinking we got it all going and we're thinking more than we are see what you need to do is look back where you came from come on somebody now that's where I want to go look back where you started and see what a wretch you were how undone you were how you didn't love God you didn't love your neighbor you didn't even love yourself he said if you look back where you started from you'll run to Jesus come on somebody you were a wretch and undone but God loved you in spite of yourself and he said I'm gonna come to you I'll come I'll shed my blood I'll give you my spirit to live out on the inside I'll help you to make it through every test every trial you'll never lose if you walk with me I got you hallelujah thank God that he reached out his hand for me thank God when I was lost and couldn't couldn't help myself he reached out and pulled me from the muck in the mire and called me into his kingdom and I'm glad about it hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah what I think of the goodness of Jesus even though I can't embrace it all I can't get it up yet my soul cries out hallelujah hallelujah not my lips my inward part the most important part of me who is my soul my soul cries out hallelujah hallelujah thank God thank God you didn't have to do it come on somebody but he loved me anyhow come on somebody I was a 10 year old thief hallelujah hallelujah and I couldn't get it right hallelujah hallelujah but he reached out and got me anyhow hallelujah I thank him I thank him hallelujah thank you Jesus thank you Jesus now let me say this when you look back most of what you will see was who you was with y'all get that and who you was with that's who you was if you knew that they wasn't hitting it that mean you wasn't hitting it neither thank you Jesus but when I look back and see who I used to us come on somebody y'all like that ebonics I look back and see where I was and I see me now and I say thank you Jesus thank you Jesus this it doesn't seem like this is really me but it's by his grace by his mercy that he loved us when we were unlovable come on somebody oh you you may have smoothed it out now and maybe you're probably lovable now but you wasn't lovable not when he found you hallelujah he could have left you on the trash heap but he picked you up he turned you around he said I want you in the family hallelujah sometimes sometimes when people come into big money I'm talking about big money then they find that they're more relatives than they thought everybody everybody trying to be a family member and then they have to put up a resistance saying no thank you but you know I'm glad that our father is rich come on somebody he owns the cattle on a thousand hills all belongs to him and he's not resisting anybody he said whosoever will let him come and drink of the waters of life he said you're drinking poison water now but come drink of the waters of life he said I'm willing to put my spirit in you I'm willing to embrace you as my own thank God for Jesus that's it y'all that's it the Lord we're we're chosen I always remember this because I wasn't chosen a whole lot in the school yard you know tall guys and they wouldn't let me give me that ball but I thank God in spite of my statue I was a little fella in my sins and he chose me hallelujah hallelujah I thank him all right elder Ross come on me what a word what a word we've been drawn nigh unto God by the blood of Jesus Christ thank God for the blood it's a blood that saves us the blood delivers us the blood sets us free from sin when we can do it for ourselves and this morning if you have not been born again been born of the water and of the spirit been baptized in the name of Jesus been filled with the precious holy ghost we invite you to come is there one is there one praise God but if you're saved today and somewhere along the line you've missed the mark like Bishop said God doesn't throw us away we are his pet project the Bible said that he who has begun a good work in you he's going to be faithful to finish what he started if you have an issue like they just raise your hand and we're going to pray anybody I'm raising my hand I got some things I need to work on I don't know about you I see that hand I see that hand I see that hand I don't know about you if I had three hands I'd be raising all of them Father we thank you that you have delivered us we thank you Lord that even when we missed us that you have not thrown us away but Bishop said your grace is sufficient and so Father we repent before you right now we ask you to forgive us that you have done your part you are the forgiveness we will do our part we will walk in holiness and righteousness and godliness we will allow the spirit of God to finish the work and we will give you the praise and the glory and the honor I declare this morning in the name of Jesus for every hand that was raised the power of God is delivering and set free and opening doors and making ways we declare victory victory victory in the name of Jesus if you believe you've got victory shout hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah we've got victory today in Jesus name amen oh don't start once you come and raise your arm free you better hold to his hands a god's unchanging hands the whole to his hand God's unchanging hands build your hopes your hopes the things that turn up oh yeah yeah yeah the whole to God's unchanging hands hold to his hands unchanging hands he say you'll never leave us forsakers hallelujah I will be reading to your hand in verse 18 it says but thou shall remember the Lord thy God for it is he that give us the power to get wealth that he may establish his covenant which he swear unto thy fathers as it is this day an niv said but you shall remember with profound respect the Lord your God for it is he is giving you power power to make wealth that he may confirm his covenant which he sword solemnly promise to your fathers as as it is this day you know we have a good job we make good money you know we have our health and our strength but without God we could do none it is the Lord makes the gives the promotion he give us the riches that we need in order to for us to obey the word of God the word of God said bring all the tithes and offering and to his storehouse that there may be me in his house and without that we can't do that without God we can't do none of that he's able to do a seemingly abundantly above that we may ask or thing so I ask you at the Lord has given to you give back not that he needs it he doesn't need our money but he wants us to be obedient to his word that's what he's wanting that's what salvation is all about being obedience if we can't be obedient we can't serve the Lord that means we don't even love him if we don't obey his word so we have to be obedient to the word of God he said give and it shall be given back to you with good measure pressed down shaken together running over shall men's give unto their buzzer so please stand with me in Jesus name everyone please stand let's be on one accord let's hold our offering up to the Lord in Jesus name father in the name of Jesus we thank you we praise you we glorify we magnify your name we thank you for the word that you sent us this morning Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God Lord we come this morning to give back to you Lord God as you are given to each and every one of us Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God Lord you said in your word that you love you love a chair forgive a Lord God Lord you said for us not to give grudgingly Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God you made a way Lord God that we may give back to you Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord we ask you that you will bless this offering multiply Lord God need Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God that you Lord God may be glorify and magnify Lord God in this church Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God Lord we thank you for the givers Lord God in the name of Jesus Lord God and those that are not able to give Lord God we ask you in the name of Jesus that you will make a way for them Lord God Lord God in Jesus name in Jesus name we pray amen and amen you're now in the hands of this thank you Lord to continue in kingdom may we glorify you and praise you in Jesus name and somebody and say he wants me how bishop Jesus wants me and we're gonna get ready to go home God bless you is that it bishop no more amen amen amen well let's get determined hallelujah leave out of these doors hallelujah with your mind made up and your heart fixed i'm gonna stay with Jesus hallelujah come on


for some people. So we're also going to spend a little bit of time on how change can be managed in the workplace. Now we're going to try to do this all in a brief time as possible. But we realize that everything that I've just said, we could talk for about a couple of hours. So we'll do our best. So what we would like you to do is to become engaged in today's Facebook live because it is about you. And we're going to ask you a question, and maybe you can start putting some comments in it, is why do you think change is so challenging for people? So why do you think change is so challenging for people? So maybe you can start answering that question. So I'm going to jump in while we get those answers in and see how it matches with what people are talking about. Hi everyone, I'm Amy Golding, Director of Psychology at the Institute. So I guess we know that change is a part of life. We know that intellectually, right? That from the minute we're born we start changing. We're growing and we're developing and we continue doing that throughout life. And the world around us is also changing. But the only way not to have change would be for the time to stand still and for the world to stand still. So we're actually quite good at dealing with change in many ways. And yet it seems that somehow as humans, we're not so great when it comes to sudden change or things that we think might be negative. And there's a couple of different psychological explanations for this.  So it seems that we humans are built for survival, not so much for happiness. I'll say that again. We're built for survival, not for happiness. Sorry to disappoint. That means that in an unconscious level, our mind is basically saying, look, I'm alive right now. Things may not be perfect, but I'm alive. If anything changes, that could threaten my survival. So therefore, I don't like or want change because it could be negative. Never mind that it could make things better.  It adopts a better the devil you know kind of approach. But that can also keep us stuck as well. So it's not so much that we don't like change. It's things that we think might be bad. And might is that really important word? Because if change was guaranteed to be positive, I don't think we would mind it at all. So we call it a surprise, wouldn't we? Well, a great surprise that we love. Like if I said today, miraculously, you're going to find an extra million dollars in your bank account, tax free, no strings attached. Would you find that change challenging? Not at all. I don't think so. You might have a challenge deciding how you're going to spend that million dollars, but I don't think we would find that quite so difficult as some other changes. Or, you know, as another example, one we often talk about in workplace settings, you know, a lot of the time people are really worried about what happens, you know, the worst case scenario and I lose my job. And, you know, people get very worried about that. And they say they don't like the change about it. But when we ask, well, if you knew that the very next day you had an even better job to move into or a more enjoyable, more fulfilling role, something that you got paid twice as much for, then again, you wouldn't mind that change so much. So we only dislike change when we feel that there's something that could be lost. So the other sort of aspect to this is that we have a need for a certain degree of certainty and security and a sense of control over our own lives. And some of us have a greater need for certainty and control than others. So it's that uncertainty that we actually find difficult, the worry for the future in case it may be negative. So we all meet our need for security in different ways. For some of us, it's by having routines and structure and being organized. For other people, it's about being very particular around how things are done, either for themselves, or sometimes that can be for others as well. So we can all imagine someone who is very particular about how their partner must do things or how their kids must do things, or in a workplace environment, you know, becoming micro managing around things, you can see how easily that need for certainty and control can become excessive and can cause distress for the person and those around them. Absolutely. That's when we when we talk about control freaks, you've probably heard of that expression. It's not a psychological diagnosis. But it definitely is a problem, you know, when the more we're fearful, the more we tend to control things, make sure that there's certainty. And but imagine how bad that could get very quickly. Imagine if your life was 100% certain, you knew exactly what was going to happen tomorrow to the last second. Why? Because what's going to happen tomorrow is exactly the same what happened today. Can you imagine how boring your life would be? Well, I can hear some people right now say, Oh, no, no, mine would be fantastic. I can't wait for that to happen. I look, I get it when we're stressed, we want a higher level of certainty. And that's why why when we're fearful, when we're stressed, what we do is we try to control. So when you meet a control freak, who you are actually meeting, it's a very scared little girl or little boy on the inside. That's why they have to control everything. They have a high need for for certainty. When you when you meet somebody that is settled, that is mature, that has some life experience, and it's okay with change, they really need to control you. If ever. Right. So this is something interesting to to think about, because we want a mindset that allows us to be comfortable with change and welcoming of change, because that makes us better human beings for other people too. So Peter, it doesn't seem like the pace of changing, the pace of change is increasing, like if change has always been around, but now it's getting faster and faster. Why? Or at least we're becoming more aware of it, because what what has changed in the last 30 years or so is not necessarily things because there's always been things happening. That's life. It's called life. But the amount of information as to what is happening, as it's in our face, we have so much information. Every single day, we have more information than a person could have had in a whole year, 60 years ago. Now we get in one in one day. So what do we do with that information? Well, you know, if if we tried to take it all in, that could be very overwhelming. So technology has meant that I can I can know about a kid that goes missing in Minnesota, in the US, while I'm in in Europe somewhere. That was not possible, you know, 100 years ago. So now all this brings change in front of our faces and a lot of it. So we need we need to to be really good at making decisions as to what we are going to pay attention and what we're not going to pay attention. And we need to be able also to get very comfortable with our own bodies. So we get to tell what kind of information is to is useful for our lives and which one is not useful. And then we have to be very disciplined. That that information that is not useful, even if it happens to be a favorite TV series, we don't entertain it, we push it aside, because we know is not going to be a good result of maybe maybe not the TV series, we'll give that one a miss, if it's your favorite one. But just you get the point, right? In order to be comfortable with change, we also would need to be decisive on what change or what barrage of information what channel of information we will accept. And there's a few critical decisions to be made there. Yeah, problem thinking about in a workplace, for example, Peter, when a change is being implemented, and, you know, we don't necessarily have choice in that matter. This is happening. And some people will be more easily able to adapt and they'll take that on board faster. It just almost seems to be a personality difference. Other people will need some time to get used to the idea to let it digest to kind of sit on it. And yet, where you've got a group of people together, they're all going to have a different style in terms of accommodating new information. Yeah. Well, let's remember that what is going to make change welcome or hurtful, sometimes it's how a level of resistance to it. Now, I'm not saying that we should accept every change. Some change comes along, and it's morally and ethically unjust and wrong. And we should not get comfortable with a change. We should adapt to that change very quickly. So we can fight it. But we fight it in a in a in a constructive way. That is appropriate. But with most change, you know, it doesn't really doesn't really matter if they have painted the walls in a different color, and we didn't like that color. Is that really that important? Can we live with that? It doesn't matter if the air conditioning is 24 degrees instead of 25. Could we could we wear a jacket? Does it really matter? So there are most of the things that come our way are not that important. They're not life changing. You know, I'm not going to break down as a person. So keep that in mind. You know, some some some changes external, and sometimes not very much we can do about it. But we can adjust their thinking and their mindset to meet a head on and make it useful for us. So what are some of the changes that people are dealing within the world today, given that, you know, there seem to be some of those bigger picture changes happening or fundamental changes to the way we live at the moment? Absolutely. Yeah. And they do impact to the core of how we live. We've we've seen lockdowns right across the world. I mean, look, that was a very different from one region to another. But you know, in general, they have limited people's ability or ability to move from one place to another, which is a very human basic human right, the ability to say, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do that. You know, but it has limited that in some places, children have not been allowed to go into the street for weeks on end. And at all, not even to exercise or to see the sun. While dogs were allowed to go out every day, often as they wanted, by the way. So that's a very just.  And some people have been forced to work from home. They haven't been asked, would you like to work from home, but they've been forced to work from home, regardless of the situation, regardless of whether they had a desk, a computer, or family around them, or a private space in which to work. I mean, imagine, it can be very easy to say, yeah, I'll work from home if I have a space where I can do it, that is quiet.  And because you're on lockdown, you don't now don't have a nanny, you don't have a childcare center. So that has been imposed on you. And there's an expectation that you will perform at the same, at the same level or close to it. So there's a lot of ways from working from home to how we operate or how we move up and down. And in the actions that we even even the action of wearing a mask, in some places, you're encouraged to wear one in some places to tell you don't wear a mask that aren't actually work. So why would you wear it? Health authorities in other places, health authorities are saying absolutely they work and they are the only thing that will save you from the virus that you must wear. So it's confusing. Not only these are changes to you're sorry, these are changes to how we work, how we relate to our family, and how we socialize with other people, how we dress. I mean, they're pretty core parts of, I mean, Freud said there's work and love, the two things in life. Intrinsic, intrinsic, intrinsic to human nature. I mean, what is the first thing that we see in another person when we look at them?  And now it's covered. We can't see the face of the other person. It's interesting. Just a few months ago, if we wanted to go into a bank, we were told to remove any thing in our face or helmets. And that is that we told everywhere, you better wear a mask like a robot. So whether we agree with masks or not, we need to understand there's a psychological cost, a psychological impact that these things have. I'm not talking about the science. That's a different conversation. But the psychology of it, how it impacts our social interactions. And some people have taken it even once they're further, I have heard anecdotally of people that are wearing masks in their own homes with their own spouse, and they haven't kissed their spouse since the beginning, just because they're so afraid of the virus. So that could logically put a lot of strain on what I think or suspect that could already be a very strange relationship to begin with. So yeah, lots of change, lots of distress. And again, I think one of the core principles here is that it's about not having that sense of control and choice around the changes in our life. That's what it's not the change itself. It's that sense of control that is so important for well-being and for mental health. And just to add, we're now seeing... Go on. The exercise of the coin. Like I may be okay with change if I accept it, or I drive it, or I volunteer for it. But what about my spouse? What about my kid? What about anybody else that is impacted by being close to me? So how are they going to, are they going to be okay with a change? How is that going to impact them? So we are living in a very narcissistic society. What I think is what should go, and I'm not going to tolerate a different kind of opinion. Not everybody, of course, but this seems to be a topic. So it is quite narcissistic. We need to be aware of that. It's very egocentric. And we need to, in times of distress, in times of change, we need to think of other people too. And we need to say, okay, well, am I respecting their way of looking at the world too? Am I being tolerant of that? Or am I expecting that everybody will play by the same rules this game? And I think that comes up at the moment with... Yeah, it's coming up at the moment is a lot of the organizations that we work with, for example, are seeing that now, in a lot of places, they're starting to get back to the regular workplace wherever that is. And so there's another change back again. So there was a change to work from home, and then there was a change to, all right, now we want to start bringing people transitioning back into the office. And for some people, that's back to business as usual. For others, there will have to be changes for social distancing and whatnot. But I can see that that's the new challenge for workplaces is that tension in how do we... We don't want to be pushy to force people to return. But we also want to create some sort of structure or consistency or those business needs that we need people back. And so for many people who've found that there are actually aspects of working from home, for example, that they enjoyed or liked or that really suited their working style. Now it's yet another change that feels like it's being forced on me as well. And I know some workplaces are more strongly encouraging that return to work than others. So I think this is a really interesting topic because it's very easy for people to feel like I'm in trouble if I don't feel comfortable to come back to work yet. And I guess I want to share that that doesn't mean that you're a bad person if you're not aligned with the change that the workplaces wanting to the direction they're wanting to move in. But there is a real need to be honest about what works for me and what this job requires as well. Because there's this sort of balance between the two. It also doesn't mean that the workplace is bad if they're opting to have a working environment that involves people being present all the time. We need to remember that when we first came into our work lives, it was all new. We started with a blank slate. If you think about the very first job that you ever had, and put it in the comments and tell us what it was because I want to see how many people are still doing that and how many have gone to something new. But we had all these expectations about what that particular industry involved. And we came together. We had an interview. We set up a contract. We said, all right, I'm going to exchange this product or service or this work in return for you giving me money to live my life. So there was this less emotional, I guess, agreement that's mutually beneficial for the two people. And over time, things change. So it's it's simple to say, well, all right, now, now the situation has changed. Does this work still meet my needs? So I still meet the organization's needs. And if it works, great. And if it doesn't, can we make it work? And if it really doesn't, this is where I need to be very honest with myself and say, well, if it's just not working for what I want anymore, then perhaps it's time to change. Absolutely. Look, and you know, and I've said this before to the audience, I'm very fond of working from home. I'm working from coffee shops. I'm working from the beach and working from wherever I really damn well like. I'm very fond and there can be a psychological advantage if you're getting that way. If you're good, not everybody is, but if you're getting in that way, and I am, I'm very fond of that. However, my being able to do that relies on other people not being able to do that. If that makes any sense, in order for me to work from the coffee shop relies on somebody not being able to work from the coffee shop because they work at the coffee shop. There wouldn't be a coffee shop if they were working from home. Does that make sense? So it's a little bit of a luxury, the fact that I can work from these places because it relies on other people not being able to do it. So I'm aware of that, you know, and it's not always a fair system. So, but I do like it and I approve of it and I encourage if people can do it, please do some. Now, should you work from home all the time? Should I always be working on my own? Look, thousands of years ago, there's a very wise man that said, you know, he who isolates himself will see it's selfish longing. And this is an interesting look at the psychology of what happens to people if we completely isolate ourselves is we become selfish, we become egocentric, where we become less able to empathize with other people. But that's pure psychology because we have no contact with the world. And if we have no contact with the world, how are we shaped? How are we challenged? We don't get that. We can do whatever that we want. But when we do whatever we want, we can become one track mind. We don't become as complete in our experience as human beings. Maturity is a lot harder to achieve, not impossible, but it is harder to achieve from a psychological perspective. So these are things to have into consideration. It is true, though, that 2020 is providing us a a thinking time, isn't it? Like, yes, there's a lot of change. But at the same time, we can look and say, how do we want to live our lives? How do we exactly what are our choices? What are real choices when someone can come along and lock us up at home? Do we have any? So the interesting questions, do we need to change something in society to make sure that we have the freedom and the safety? Because we don't, we don't want to, we don't want to hurt other people. Well, normal people like us, we don't want to hurt other people. We do what we do because we want to help people. So what can we do?  To me, a big question is earth cleanliness. What can we do in order to make the earth more clean?  I don't think anybody wants that. Or I don't want to go outside in the city to have a cup of coffee and they get into smog. So is this an opportunity in which we take real appraisal of what we do? See, change can equal opportunity to kind of. So what's the opportunity here at work? Now we've experienced working from home. Most people have gotten used to this technology of, you know, where we can talk and we can be in real time with each other, which is amazing. This is like a miracle, right? This is an amazing magical technique, technology, which allows us to do that. You know, months ago, most people wouldn't even know how to, no, most people, a lot of people didn't even know how to turn on the computer and didn't know about this thing called zoom. Now everybody is zooming all around the place. Zoom, zoom, zoom. Right? So yes, change can be scary, but also it cause opportunity. So we need to get into that mindset, right? So how do we deal then with change and uncertainty that's been imposed? And I want to share what might sound like a bit of a contradictory approach, but stick with me on this. We're at one level, we want to look for where and how can I get that sense of certainty and security, particularly when it feels like there is none when things are in chaos. On the other hand, at another level, we also want to look at how can I surrender to that uncertainty and the seeming chaos. So these two kind of intertwine because sometimes the way you get control over a situation is by being OK, not having control. So you can get control by being OK without control. So a quick example, there might be in a workplace, there might be an announcement that there's going to be redundancies and I don't know if my job is going to be one of the ones going. I don't know what would happen if I did lose that job. Would I get another one? Where would I work? There's a lot of uncertainty in that scenario, right? So to answer for ourselves, the first question, where can I get a sense of certainty and control? How can I tap into something that I know for sure? What do I know for sure? Well, I know for sure that I can ask for information. I can ask about time frames. I can I can take. I can be empowered to ask those questions and find out what I can. There may or may not be answers, but I can ask. I know for sure that I have good skills. I've completed various training courses on the qualified person. I'm a dedicated person. So that puts me in good stead going forward for the future. I know that I can prepare my resume or my portfolio and have that ready and also so that I can have a sense of how much value I actually bring to the world. I can start to look at alternative options. So I know what's out there. If I need to sort of a contingency plan. What if I can't get another job? Well, I know for sure that I have X months of savings in the account as a bit of a buffer. Or I know for certain that I can find a way, even if it means taking on something else temporarily until I can get back into my industry, for example. So we're looking for just as many things as we can think of that can give me a sense of what I do know for sure what I am certain of so that we get a sense of control. And then we bring in the flip side, which is and now I surrender to whatever's going to happen. I wait and see will what's going to happen with the redundancies that may be absolutely. So I have done all all I can. I've done my best, put everything in place, practical steps and and now I wait. Yeah. And that waiting, I think, is oftentimes what people can sort of struggle with. Yeah. Some people are helped by having a faith or religion or something that they trust in sort of outside of myself. There's someone or something else, a higher power that is in control of everything, even if I'm not. But for other people, it can be a trust in myself. So reminding myself that I don't know what's going to happen, but I trust that whatever happens, I'll handle it. I will cope. I've always managed to get through till now in life, despite the things that have been thrown at me in life. And I will continue to do that. I will find a way. But having said all of that, there are some people who actually really thrive on uncertainty and change. Many of us find it difficult, but there are those those people that seem to love it. I'm sure you can think of people that seem to, you know, move location all the time or they switch jobs a lot. Or they they seem to handle it really well. So I'm curious and I'll get Peter to answer this. Yeah. Some people seem to cruise through or even thrive. I'm going to I'm going to sound like a grandpa now, but it reminds me of a story. Once I went into one of these opportunities, it was it was a job in which we were all new and it was like 15 people in there. And in the course of explaining to us what the the job was going to entail, they're mentioning passing that they didn't have the manager, a team leader for the team yet. That was it in passing. By the end of the one hour presentation, we had we had a little bit of a break in the middle and by the end, they told us that one of the ladies there had offered herself as a team leader and she was now the team leader. And I was like, oh my God. Yeah, that's an example of someone that goes with change very quickly and grabs it on. And I've seen people do that. I've seen people in which downsizing gets announced and a package is offered and they jump at the opportunity and they move, they grab the package, get out of there and before anybody else is looking for new jobs in the market, they are out there and they've got a job within two weeks because there's no competition.  And five years later, there's still another downsize coming and there's still something. Obviously, the annoying ones, the ones that move quickly, they are annoying, the ones that have got a mindset in which change, move, change, move, change, action, change, action tend to do a lot better. And those that are changed are resisted, resisted for as long as they can, they're going to get upset, they're going to get depressed and they lose strength. So there's a mindset that doesn't love change but accepts change for what it is, the reality. And there's a mindset that allows people to move on quickly. So what do we see? How do we see those people that we can adopt? What do we learn from so that we can get better and making that change?  Change action. And then don't just think of the action but implement the action if it's a good one. Now use change as a motivator not as a detractor. I've met some people that have caught a convincing or a convencer that takes a couple of months. You ask them how do you like this? I say I'll take you in a couple of months from a change adopting perspective that's an issue. You don't see good leaders taking a couple of months with decisions or waiting until they have all the information. They don't wait until they have all the information. They just need a summary. They just need a list of the benefits. And within a few minutes they've made a decision and once they've made a decision unless contradictory evidence doesn't come their way, they stick to that decision. It's a decision for sure. They also are okay with taking risk. They know that whatever decision they make will have an amount of risk or an amount of opportunity loss. That's what happens when you make a decision this way, you can't go the other way. It's like being in a car. If you decide to turn right that's it. You can't turn left at the same time. You miss that opportunity. But that's okay. Because right has got its benefits and left that as well. I often share with people a good way to practice this is to practice making decisions next time you go out to a restaurant to eat a meal. Some people will stress over the menu, what am I going to order? I know I like this because I had that last time but I should I always have the same thing every time? Or should I try something new? Just a really simple and fun way to practice taking safe risks and making decisions quickly is to be able to say right I've got 30 seconds and I'm going to decide and train yourself to be able to make those decisions quickly. You're generous. I was going to say 10 seconds. 30 seconds is a long time. The idea is to reduce the time that it takes you to make a decision. Because the only reason why you're taking so long or we take so long to make a decision is because of fear. So we need to get over the fear. The only way to get over the fear is to practice. Right? So that's a great exercise. But what would there has to be a little punishment if you don't make it within 30 seconds? What's the punishment? You have to pay for the meal. You have to pay for everybody's meal. I love it. I love it. Let's see what happens. If you guys put that into practice, tell us what happened. Also, what I see people with a good mindset around change is their self-talk. They don't ruminate. This is an important thing because especially women are given to ruminate. Ruminating is to go over the same decision again and again and again. Have you ever been like that? I have to back you up there and just let you know that's proven by the research. It's not a patriarchal thing at all. No, no. This is actually psychological studies they've done. It's women, not all women of course, but women as a group tend to ruminate on problems and decisions again and again. So they will make a decision, yes, I think I will wear white to the wedding next weekend. You can't wear white to a wedding. Unless you're the bride. Or maybe I won't wear white then. I'll wear yellow. By Tuesday, yellow maybe it doesn't look so good with my skin. I'll wear gray. No, then you'll stand out too much. I shouldn't have chosen. I shouldn't have chosen I'm waiting for the example then. But it's a good example, right? Because you go back to the decision. That's exhausting. It's related to higher rates of depression. It's one of the factors. And anxiety. And who suffers most anxiety in the world as a gender group? Women, by far. Why? Because if you think everything three or four times or you think about what you could have done or what you lost by making this decision, your husband I had two or three other men that were after me. What would have happened? You're never going to be happy where you are right now and your anxiety levels are going to go through the room. It's an ability. Make your decision and drop intellectually psychologically, drop the other choices that you didn't make. Stick to that one. And talk to yourself in such a way that supports your decision, not undermines it. What if I made a mistake? It's not a good question. And this comes to the self-talk. How we talk to ourselves. And I think we really on a whole we need to stop saying that I don't like change and we need to start telling ourselves that I love variety. I love adventure. Life is to be lived. Or maybe it's that I'm a laid back person even if you feel at some level maybe I'm not so much. If we can change the self-talk in our head in the direction that we want it to be so that we can start practicing those skills because the way our mind works it listens to what we tell ourselves. So if we tell ourselves this is stressful and I hate change, we're going to resist it and dislike it more and find it more difficult. If we tell ourselves it's going to be okay, something always works out one way or another and I go with the flow then we become our own coach, our own cheerleader to help us in the direction that we want to go in. Right.  The faster you can join the both, the easier change will be and the more likely change will become a fuel for good results and success in your life at every level and you know what as far as we know there's only one life as far as we know right there might be a sudden later, there might be a resurrection there might be a reincarnation but right now we've got this one, we may as well do as the best we can with it so the less time we waste in in adapting to change the better it is. So and I have to say Peter one of the changes that I've seen people make in this space is that in the past few months we're noticing that the world can change so drastically and quickly that I see more and more people willing to live for the moments so to speak so you know why wait till a month from now to go out to that restaurant for dinner we might not have a chance let's do it now let's enjoy it now let's make the most of the here and now why wait for retirement to do the job that I've always dreamed of why not make that happen now so that's sort of I think one of the trends that I'm seeing in terms of how people's psychology is shifting as a result of everything that's been going on in the world this year yeah yeah that's very true and that's something to think about and it comes it's a good introduction to the topic of next week because next week we're going to be talking part of what we're going to be talking about is going to be about how social media not social media alone but how being connected to screens all the time is impacting our relationships our most intimate relationships with our spouses, with our partners with our kids, with our friends not for the positive not for the positive but for the negative not anti screens but we will tell you exactly how that is this is happening and I'm not anti technology I love my technology but we need to be aware of this if we're not going to lose our humanity so we will talk about that next week because it's a very exciting topic I can't wait to talk to you about it I have to stop myself literally right now that's how interesting it is so we've looked at why change can be challenging the increasing pace of change some of the changes that people are dealing with at the moment and how we can deal with uncertainty on one level but also how some people really thrive on change and uncertainty and how we can use that more effectively that mindset of positive change so I'm going to put a call out there just to see if there's any final questions before we wrap up for today in the meantime Peter any final comments on the trends that you see for the future of well-being and particularly well-being at work yes of course a very positive one where people have got more flexibility in the workforce especially for women or men that have got responsibility with kids it's very positive in that regard but let's remember that these changes only apply to luxurious states like the western western society where we have the luxury where we can do this hopefully other people around the world will soon be able to do that too the positive as well is that psychologically we're aware of the things that work really well in this space so this information is now available this in-depth and advanced information is also coming to you for free we're talking about it now and this can be very useful but it needs to reach more people so the more we share this information with other people the better it is you never know who's needing it we're all in control freaks in potential control freaks it just takes fear for us to become more controlling so don't let fear of change or any type of fear but fear of change dominate your life so let's get on with the change and I think we're going to brace ourselves because a lot of change is coming over the next few months as well so we'll see what they are and peter aunty kick has put in a great comment here about perfectionism and can make it harder to change sometimes wait for everything to be perfect when we should move first and then adjust and then move closer to perfection if such a thing even exists because who decides what's perfect and that's what I was going to talk about I think a very good question should have talked about that is what's perfect I mean what standard is perfect and sometimes we need to look at if I have perfectionism that's not a that's not a virtue I find it funny because I used to be one of those I used to talk about I'm a perfectionist as if it was a virtue it's not a virtue it doesn't achieve anything it lets you postpone very conveniently because if you can't make it perfect you don't have to do anything so it's very self-serving if we're really honest with ourselves it's a little bit selfish because what does it mean most people that claim that don't achieve anything I always give the example someone who wants to write the perfect book but if you spend 80 years perfecting the perfect book then you've deprived the rest of the world from that enjoyment for 80 years even if we looked at the technology that we have now it's been continuously improved over time we didn't wait until we had perfect technology before we start using things and we get it out there we get a certain level and we put it out into the world and then you improve that's continuous quality improvement I remember that's a very interesting one because now with Lucas I experienced a little bit of this it's just an example but when I was a kid and we didn't like some food we were fussy about food my grandparents whoever was there they used to say, you know what your problem is you haven't experienced hunger if you had experienced hunger you would eat everything now that I'm older I agree we're only perfectionists because we are spoiled and we can wait and not much happens life doesn't completely crumble it gets destroyed if we postpone things other people don't have the luxury of postponing other people don't have the luxury of perfectionism they have to do with whatever is available to them and I think that's a brilliant skill to be able to have in life it's probably a work in progress for a lot of us to practice that dropping the perfectionism and it is a work in progress because we need to sit down and write down specifically what's my belief around this how do I know when I have achieved this goal so there's a method in which you can get out of this and do something how would I know when I have achieved this goal is it something that I see is it something that I feel is it something that I hear is it something that I do and then look at this because if we're suffering from perfectionism one of those rules that we have imposed on ourselves is not realistic but when we find it and we go oh that's not realistic what would be more realistic than that and then we change that with the realistic goal we stop being perfectionist remember at the end of the day if you're hungry a beautifully presented meal is fantastic but a normal meal will do the job too and sometimes what we need to do is get it done I was just about to say that's been one of the most useful pieces of advice that I've ever received it doesn't have to be perfect it just has to get done progress is better than perfect we can repeat these things to ourselves until we get it and if we learn anything from Microsoft and Bill Gates and we haven't you can put it out a completely shorty product to the world sell it for billions of dollars and then a few months later put version 2 out and on that note I'm going to wrap up before we get ourselves in trouble thanks everyone for joining us today as you said next week we've got social media we're going to be talking more about mental health and the pointy end of the continuum when it comes to mental health as well so make sure to like and follow the page so you get the notification brilliant topic what to do when it all gets too much we hope to see you there bye bye everybody thanks for joining take care thank you bye hi I'm Emmy Golding director of psychology for the Workplace Mental Health Institute we hope you liked the video if you did make sure to give it a thumbs up we have more and more videos being released each week so when you subscribe you'll get a notification letting you know when a new one's just been published so make sure to hit that subscribe button and don't miss out on this vital information for yourself, your colleagues and your loved ones


Warm, wet, whole versus a real woman.  I didn't internalize that, but maybe my sister did. Started having sex at a young age. What I learned from her was there's two types of women. There's a warm, wet, whole. If the only thing you have to offer a man is sex, that's what you are. And guess what? Guess who else has a warm, wet, whole? Every other woman out there.  But you say warm, wet, whole. I'm like, well, if you have one and it's not warm and wet, you might want to seek some sort of gynecological intervention. But let's be honest.   If you subscribe to that mentality as a woman versus a real woman, you can catapult a man. Some of the most successful men who have children who turn out to be amazing and they say, my wife enabled all of this.


Petroceol E has been found to be effective at inducing neuronal differentiation and combating oxidative stress. It does so by increasing the activity of NRF2, which leads to increased neuronal differentiation and decreased oxidative stress. This could lead to the development of new therapeutics based on petroceol compounds to treat neurodegenerative diseases. This article was authored by Jing Liu, Lin Lin Wang, Yu Guadu, and others.


Here we go. Yes, Quinn Wilson. That's my best friend. We direct all our videos together He was so fine, but he had to stand on the Apple box to be taller than me. I Love this we referenced Madonna when she was on Letterman. She was not having it Yes, I Love these shots. You know these shots came last minute the video did not have these scenes in it There you go, Sean Ross look at this hair. Oh my god, shout out Detroit So yeah, this scene did not exist and I was like, we just need one more thing to kind of tie it together We thought that scene was gonna be like just a little insert ended up being the whole thing Everybody's on fan art This is cute. Yes, big girl That's the soul blow y'all know about that go watch coming to America with Eddie Murphy Oh That's not how the song goes. That's how I want to be me. Oh, I love that shot Oh So this is my favorite part of the whole video because I finally have a boyfriend even if it's imaginary He drinking the 40, but the 40 is juice. It's the sauce you get that Everybody thinks that's Fenty. That's not Fenty. I'm wearing. That's just some lingerie. Oh And I'm like you looking at you better not be talking to no office me Story of my life Yeah, so ASMR is like my favorite thing I've been watching ASMR my audio sensory meridian response has been tingling my whole life. I got getting one of pee So we really want to put ASMR in there.  I did not think I was gonna make the video, but they put it in there John Ross is so cool. That's my friend We had a whole like speaking part with each other, but it didn't make the video.  That was my favorite part of the day I was like you gotta hit it with gusto Beautiful gown That is a Seth Pratt gown. That is some shell beneath baby hair on my head looking like Froot Loops. I Love this scene. This was like the dream scene. That's a star filter That's making me all glittery the director Queen Wilson was like, we have to put you in this setup This is the only thing she care about being in the video.  That was perfect. I talked too much


what's up ladies and gents I'm back and it's been a while but this is going to be my return so in this video I'm just going to explain a very simple tip or technique you can use to either fall asleep faster for one or have more lucid dreams you know better sleep that sort of thing so when when you go to sleep when you try and you know go into a sleeping state what happens is your body will try and relax you in stages it won't just happen instantly unless you're super tired and you you know you have a sleep doubt or something like that so in an average day or night your body will try and take you sort of down a staircase of relaxation if that makes sense so you'll start you know you'll get into bed and then you'll get slightly more relaxed and slightly more until you're actually asleep it doesn't happen instantly and so when your body is deciding what step you're on when it's deciding how how relaxed you are it uses a few things and a few signals to determine how tired you are now so stick with me for this I appreciate this is a bit in depth and a bit involved compared to some of my other videos but when you learn this you'll really have a better understanding of how you fall asleep and how to instantly fall asleep if you have trouble you know if you if you have insomnia or if you have difficulty with actually getting to sleep this will really help you so like I said your body falls asleep in stages and it uses certain signals to tell it when to do certain things now one of the most key things that you'll notice when you fall asleep all that you won't notice actually is you'll enter sleep paralysis at some point now some of you will be aware of this some of you won't depends on how you know it depends on you as a person if you are not aware of it don't worry if you are aware of it it can be a bit scary but it's nothing to worry about so when basically sleep paralysis is your body's way of paralyzing your muscles so that you don't act out your dreams when you're asleep so that you don't start kicking if you're dreaming about running for example it's a very natural thing and it happens to everyone and sleep paralysis is nothing to be worried about nothing you should try and avoid because it's natural right it actually stops you from hurting yourself when you're asleep now when your body or your mind is deciding when to put you into sleep paralysis it uses what's known as the rollover signal now the rollover signal is your body's way of testing whether your your mind is awake or you're still asleep okay now in a normal natural human being you wouldn't actually be aware of sleep paralysis because your body would send the rollover signal to your brain if you rollover i'll explain this in a minute more in more depth but if you rollover then your body would keep you awake and it would not put you into sleep paralysis until you ignored the rollover signal because your mind was asleep now what i mean by that is there's normally a bit of overlap normally you'll get this strong urge to rollover or to change your position in the bed to rollover to your other side or to across your legs or whatever this is known as a rollover signal when you get that urge that that feeling that you need to move that's your mind your body sorry telling your mind it's asking your mind a question it's saying are you still awake if you respond to that signal okay if you actually turn over when you have the urge to turn over you won't fall asleep and and so it's very important to especially if you have trouble falling asleep if you're an insomniac or whatever you need to make sure that you ignore that rollover signal or that urge to move your position okay now what's going to happen here is if you ignore the urge you will experience sleep paralysis you will notice it happening and you'll feel like a heavy blanket being pressed against your body and it rolled over you this is normal this is nothing to be scared about even though it can be a bit disconcerting at times but basically that's it so let me start right from the beginning just to summarize a bit here so when you go to sleep when you try and fall asleep you normally would lay there for say 20 minutes and try and relax okay then after a certain amount of time you would get the urge to rollover if you stay still long enough in a certain position you'll get the urge to rollover at some point now when you get that urge ignore it don't move at all okay don't even move your arms your legs don't even do anything like that as long as you can breathe properly and you're not you know dribbling or um finding it hard to breathe then just don't move don't move at all and what's going to happen is your mind or your body is going to think oh okay he's ignored the rollover signal he must be asleep therefore let's start sleep paralysis and what's happened what happened then is you will enter the sleep paralysis state where you'll feel like you can't move you might feel like there's something pressing against you you might feel like um you know you're you're weightless you know this the experience can have have many different uh it can it can be experienced in many different ways but the point is that once you get to sleep paralysis you're basically asleep you're going to fall asleep either very soon or you already are asleep and what this means is you can enter a lucid dream directly so normally you would experience sleep paralysis only for a moment and then you'd fall asleep completely what you need to do is at this point so if you want a lucid dream when you get to sleep paralysis stage keep your mind awake by like folk by focusing on the dream you want to have okay so when you feel like you can't move but you're still panicking inside your head thinking oh i can't move what am i going to do um when you get to that stage you can go one of two ways you can either ignore it relax and try and just fall asleep normally okay or you can keep your mind awake and have a lucid dream so it's up to you it's completely up to you you can use this to either fall asleep faster okay by ignoring the rollover signal sleep paralysis sleep or you can use it have a lucid dream ignore the rollover signal sleep paralysis lucid dream it really depends on what you want to do so i hope this has been helpful um and if you have any ideas any suggestions please leave a comment i'll try and reply to everyone and i'll see you next time