54 Containing some particulars relative to the double knock and other matters, among which certain interesting disclosures relative to Mr. Snodgrass and a young lady are by no means irrelevant to this history.   What's the matter? inquired the clerk. The extraordinary boy replied not a word, but he nodded once, and seemed to the clerk's imagination to snore feebly. Where do you come from? inquired the clerk. The boy made no sign. He breathed heavily, but in all other respects was motionless. The clerk repeated the question thrice, and receiving no answer, prepared to shut the door when the boy suddenly opened his eyes, winked several times, sneezed once, and raised his hand as if to repeat the knocking. Finding the door open, he stared about him with astonishment, and at length fixed his eyes on Mr. Lothan's face.  Which way? said the boy in a slow and sleepy voice. Why, like forty hackney coachmen, replied the clerk, because Master said I wasn't to leave off knocking till they opened the door, for fear I should go to sleep, said the boy. Well, said the clerk, what message have you brought? He is downstairs, rejoined the boy. Oh. Master, he wants to know whether you're at home. Mr. Lothan bethought himself at this juncture of looking out the window. Seeing an open carriage with a hearty old gentleman in it, looking up very anxiously, he ventured to beckon to him, on which the old gentleman jumped out directly. That's your master and the carriage, I suppose, said Lothan. The boy nodded. While further inquiries were superseded by the appearance of old Wardle, who, running upstairs and just recognizing Lothan, passed at once into Mr. Perker's room. Pick quick, said the old gentleman, your hand, my boy, why have I never heard until the day before yesterday of your suffering yourself to be cooped up in jail? And why did you let him do it, Perker? I couldn't help it, my dear sir, replied Perker, with a smile and a pinch of snuff. Oh, now how obstinate he is. Of course I do, of course I do, replied the old gentleman. I'm heartily glad to see him notwithstanding. I will not lose sight of him again in a hurry. With these words Wardle shook Mr. Pickwick's hand once more, and having done the same by Perker threw himself into an armchair, his jolly red face shining again with smiles and health. Well, said Wardle, here are pretty goings-on and a pinch of your snuff. Perker, my boy, never were such times, eh? What do you mean, inquired Mr. Pickwick? Mean, replied Wardle, why, I think the girls are all runnin' mad. That's no news, you'll say. Perhaps it's not, but it's true, friend, for all that. You have not come up to London of old places in the world to tell us, but, my dear sir, have you? Inquired Perker. Now, not altogether, replied Wardle, though it was the main cause of my coming. How's Arabella? Very well, replied Mr. Pickwick, and will be delighted to see you, I am sure. Black-eyed little jilt, replied Wardle. I had a great idea of marrying her myself one of these odd days, but I'm glad of it too, very glad. How did the intelligence reach you, asked Mr. Pickwick? Oh, it came to my girls, of course, replied Wardle. Arabella wrote the day before yesterday to say she had made a stolen match without her husband's father's consent, and so you had gone down to get it and went his refusing it, couldn't prevent the match, and all the rest of it. I thought it very good time to say something serious to my girls, so I said what a dreadful thing it was that children should marry without their parents' consent and so forth. But, bless your hearts, I couldn't make the least impression upon them. They thought it's such a much more dreadful thing that there should have been a wedding without bridesmaids, that I might as well have preached to Joe himself. Here the old gentleman stopped to laugh, and, having done so to his heart's content, presently resumed. But this is not the best of it, it seems. This is only half of love-making and plotting that have been going forward. We have been walking on mines for the last six months, and there sprung at last. What do you mean, exclaimed Mr. Pickwick, turning pale? No other secret marriage, I hope. No, thou, replied old Wharton. Not so bad as that, no. What then, inquired Mr. Pickwick, am I interested in it? Shall I answer the question, Berger? said Wharton. If you don't commit yourself to doing so, my dear sir. Well, then you are, said Mr. Wharton. How, asked Mr. Pickwick anxiously, in what way? replied Wharton. You're such a fiery sort of young fellow that I'm almost afraid to tell you. But, however, if Berger will sit between us to prevent Ms. Giff, I'll venture. Having closed the room door and fortified himself with another application of Berger's snuffbox, the old gentleman proceeded with his great disclosure in these words. The fact is that my daughter Bella, Bella, who married young Twundle, you know. Yes, yes, we know, said Mr. Pickwick, impatiently. Don't alarm me at the very beginning. My daughter Bella, Emily having gone to bed with a headache after she had read Arabella's letter to me, sat herself down by my side the other evening and began to talk over this marriage affair. Well, Paul, she says, what do you think of it? Why, my dear, I said. I suppose it's all very well, I hope it's for the best. I answered in this way because I was sitting before the fire at the time, drinking my grog rather thoughtfully, and I knew my throwing in an undecided word now and then would induce her to continue talking.  It's quite a marriage of affection, Paul, said Bella after a short silence. Yes, my dear, I said. But such marriages do not always turn out the happiest. I questioned that mind, interposed Mr. Pickwick warmly. Very good, responded Wardle, question anything you like when it's your turn to speak, but don't interrupt me. I beg your pardon, said Mr. Pickwick. Granted, replied Wardle. I'm very sorry to hear you express your opinion against marriages of affection, Paul, said Bella, coloring a little. I was wrong, I have not to have said so, my dear, either, said I, patting her cheek as kindly as a rough old fella like me could pat it, for your mother's was one and so was yours. It's not about what I meant, Paul, said Bella. The fact is, Paul, I wanted to speak to you about Emily. Mr. Pickwick started. What's the matter now, inquired Wardle, stopping in his narrative. Nothing, replied Mr. Pickwick, pray go on. I never could spin out a story, said Wardle abruptly. It must come out sooner or later, and it'll save us all a great deal of time if it just comes out at once. The long and short of it is, then, that Bella at last mustered up courage to tell me that Emily was very unhappy. That she and your young friend's nodgrass had been in constant correspondence and communication ever since last Christmas. That she had very duetively made up her mind to run away with him. In laudable imitation of her old friend and school fellow. But that having some compunctions and conscience on the subject, in as much as I have always been rather kindly disposed to both of them, they had thought it better in the first instance to pay me the compliment of asking whether I would have any objection to their being married in the usual matter-of-fact manner. There now, Mr. Pickwick, if you can make it convenient to reduce your eyes to their usual size again, and to let me hear what you think we ought to do, I shall feel rather obliged to you. The testy manner in which the hearty old gentleman uttered this last sentence was not wholly unwarranted. For Mr. Pickwick's face head settled down into an expression of blank amazement and perplexity, quite curious to behold. Snotgrass, since last Christmas, were the first broken words that issued from the lips of the confirmed gentleman. Since last Christmas, replied Wardle, that's plain enough, and very bad spectacles we must have worn not to have discovered it before. I don't understand it, said Mr. Pickwick, ruminating. I really cannot understand it. It's easy enough to understand, replied the choleric old gentleman. If you had been a younger man, you would have been in this secret long ago. And besides, added Wardle after a moment's hesitation, the truth is that, knowing nothing of this matter, I have rather pressed Emily for four or five months past to receive favorably. If she could, I would never attempt to force a girl's inclinations, the addresses of a young gentleman down in our neighborhood. I have no doubt that girl-like to enhance her own value and increase the ardor of Mr. Snotgrass, she has represented this matter in very glowing colors, and that they have both arrived at the conclusion that they are a terribly persecuted pair of unfortunates who have now resourced but clandestine matrimony or charcoal. Now the question is, what's to be done? What have you done? inquired Mr. Pickwick. I mean, what did you do when your married daughter told you this? Oh, I made a fool of myself, of course, rejoined Wardle, just so, imposed Perker, who had accompanied this dialogue with sundry twitchings of his watch chain, vindicative rubbings of his nose, and other symptoms of impatience. That's very natural, but how? I went into a great passion and frightened my mother into a fit, said Wardle. That was judicious, remarked Perker. And what else? I fredded and fumed all next day and raised a great disturbance. Rejoined the old gentleman. And at last I got tired of rendering myself unpleasant and making everybody miserable, so I hired a carriage at Muggleton and, putting my own horses in it, came up to town under pretense of bringing Emily to see Arabella. Miss Wardle is with you then, said Mr. Pickwick. To be sure she is, replied Wardle. She is at Osborne's hotel in the Adelphi at this moment, unless your enterprising friend has run away with her since I came out this morning. You are reconciled then, said Perker? Not a bit of it, answered Wardle. She has been crying and moping ever since, except last night between tea and supper, when she made a great parade of writing a letter that I pretended to take no notice of. You want my advice in this matter, I suppose? Said Perker, looking from the musing face of Mr. Pickwick to the eager countenance of Wardle, and taking several consecutive pinches of his favorite stimulant. I suppose I'll, said Wardle, looking at Mr. Pickwick. Certainly, replied the gentleman. Well then, said Perker, rising and pushing his chair back, my advice is that you both walk away together, or ride away and get away by some means or other, for I'm tired of you and just talk this matter over between you. If you have not settled it by the next time I see you, I'll tell you what to do. This is satisfactory, said Wardle, heartily knowing whether to smile or be offended. Poo-poo, my dear sir, returned Perker, I know you both a great deal better than you know yourselves. You have settled it already, to all intents and purposes. Thus expressing himself, the little gentleman poked his snuff box first into the chest of Mr. Pickwick, and then into the waistcoat of Mr. Wardle, upon which they all three laughed, but especially the two last-named gentlemen, who at once shook hands again without any obvious or particular reason. You dine with me today? said Wardle to Perker, as he showed them out. Can't promise, my dear sir, can't promise, replied Perker, all look in, in the evening, at all events. I shall expect you at five, said Wardle. Now, Joe! And Joe, having been at length, awakened the two friends departed, in Mr. Wardle's carriage, which in common humanity had a dickey behind for the Fat Boy, who, if there had been a footboard instead, would have rolled off and killed himself in his very first nap. Driving to the Georgian vulture, they found that Arabella and her maid had sent for the Hackney coach immediately, on the receipt of a short note from Emily announcing her arrival in town, and had proceeded straight to the Adelphi. As Wardle had business to transact in the city, they sent the carriage and the Fat Boy to his hotel, with the information that he and Mr. Pickwick would return together to dinner at five o'clock. Charged with this message, the Fat Boy returned, slumbering as peacefully in his dickey over the stones as if it had been a down bed on watch springs. By some extraordinary miracle he awoke of his own accord when the coach stopped, and giving himself a good shake to stir up his faculties when upstairs to execute his commission. Now whether the shake had jumbled the Fat Boy's faculties together instead of arranging them in proper order, or had roused such a quantity of new ideas within him as to render him oblivious to ordinary forms and ceremonies, or, which is also possible, had proved unsuccessful in preventing his falling asleep as he ascended the stairs, it is an undoubted fact that he walked into the sitting-room without previously knocking at the door. And so beheld the gentleman, with his arms clasping his young mistress's waist, sitting very lovingly by her side on a sofa, while Arabella and her pretty handmaid feigned to be absorbed in looking out of a window at the other end of the room. At sight of this phenomenon, the Fat Boy uttered an interjection, the ladies' scream, and the gentleman in oath, almost simultaneously. Wretched creature, what do you want here? said the gentleman, who it is needless to say was Mr. Snodgrass. To this the Fat Boy, considerably terrified, briefly responded, Mrs. What do you want me for? inquired Emily, turning her head aside.  Master and Mr. Pickwick is a-going to dine here at five, replied the Fat Boy. Leave the room, said Mr. Snodgrass, glaring upon the bewildered youth. No, no, no, added Emily hastily, Bella, dear, advise me. Upon this Emily and Mr. Snodgrass, and Arabella and Mary, crowded into a corner and conversed earnestly in whispers for some minutes, during which the Fat Boy dozed. Joe, said Arabella at length, looking round with the most bewitching smile. How do you do, Joe?  I won't forget you, Joe. Joe, said Mr. Snodgrass, advancing to the astonished youth and seizing his hand. I didn't know you before. There's five shillings for you, Joe. I'll owe you five, Joe, said Arabella, for old acquaintance you know. And another most captivating smile was bestowed upon the corpulent intruder. The Fat Boy's perception being slow, he looked rather puzzled at first to account for the sudden pre-possession in his favor, and stared about him in a very alarming manner. At length his broad face began to show symptoms of a grin and proportionately broad dimensions. And then thrusting half a crown into each of his pockets and a hand and wrist after it, he burst into a horse laugh being for the first and only time in his existence. He understands us, I see, said Arabella. He had better have something to eat immediately, remarked Emily. The Fat Boy almost laughed again when he heard the suggestion. Mary, after a little more whispering, tripped forth from the group and said, I'm going to dine with you today, sir, if you have no objection. This way, said the Fat Boy eagerly, there was such a jolly meat pie. With these words the Fat Boy led the way downstairs, his pretty companion captivating, all the waiters and angering all the chambermaids as she followed him to the eating room. There was a meat pie of which the youth had spoken so feelingly, and there were moreover a steak and a dish of potatoes and a pot of porter. Sit down, said the Fat Boy. Oh, my eye, how prime! I am so hungry. Having apostrophized his eye in a species of rapture five or six times, the youth took the head of the little table and Mary seated herself at the bottom. We have some of this, said the Fat Boy, plunging into the pie up to the very ferrules of the knife and fork. A little, if you please, replied Mary. The Fat Boy assisted Mary to a little and himself to a great deal, and was just going to begin eating when he suddenly laid down his knife and fork, leaned forward in his chair, and letting his hands with the knife and fork in them fall to his knees, said very slowly, I say, how nice you look! This was said in an admiring manner and was so far gratifying, but still there was enough to the cannibal in the young man's eyes to render the compliment a double one. Dear me, Joseph, said Mary, affection and blush, to what do you mean? The Fat Boy, gradually recovering his former position, replied with a heavy sigh, and remaining thoughtful for a few moments, drank a long drought of the porter, having achieved this feat, he sighed again and replied himself assiduously to the pie. What a nice young lady Miss Emily is, said Mary after a long silence. The Fat Boy had by this time finished the pie. He fixed his eyes on Mary and replied, I know a nicer. Indeed, said Mary, yes indeed, replied the Fat Boy with unwanted vivacity. What's her name, inquired Mary? What's yours? Mary. So's hers, said the Fat Boy.  The boy grinned to add point to the compliment and put his eyes into something between a squint and a cast, which there is reason to believe he intended for an ogle. You mustn't talk to me in that way, said Mary. You don't mean it. Don't I, though? replied the Fat Boy. I say. Well, are you going to come here regularly? No, rejoined Mary shaking her head. I'm going away again tonight. Why? Oh, said the Fat Boy, in a tone of strong feeling, how we should have enjoyed ourselves at meals if you had been. I might come here sometimes, perhaps to see you, said Mary plating the tablecloth and assumed coiness. If you would do me a favour. The Fat Boy looked from the pie dish to the steak. As if he thought a favour must be in some manner connected with something to eat, and then took out one of the half-crowns and glanced at it nervously.  Again he looked at the half-crown and said faintly, No. The ladies want you not to say anything to the old gentleman about the young gentleman having been upstairs, and I want you too. Is that all? said the Fat Boy, evidently very much relieved as he pocketed the half-crown again. Of course I ain't going to. You see, said Mary, Mr. Snodgrass is very fond of Miss Emily, and Miss Emily is very fond of him, and if you were to tell about it the old gentleman would carry you all away miles into the country where you'd see nobody. No, no, I won't tell, said the Fat Boy, stately. That's a dear, said Mary, now it's time I went upstairs and got my lady ready for dinner. Don't go yet, urged the Fat Boy. I must, replied Mary, good-bye for the present. The Fat Boy, with elephantine playfulness, stretched out his arms to have a she-kiss, but as it required no great agility to elude him his fare and slaver had vanished before he closed them again, upon which the apathetic youth ate a pound or so of steak with a sentimental countenance and fell fast asleep. There was so much to say upstairs, and there were so many plans to concert for elopement and matrimony in the event of old Whartal continuing to be cruel, that it wanted only half an hour of dinner when Mr. Snodgrass took his final adieu. The ladies ran to Emily's bedroom to dress, and the lower, taking up the hat, walked out of the room. He had scarcely got outside the door when he heard Whartal's voice talking loudly and looking over the banisters, beheld him followed by some other gentleman coming straight upstairs. Knowing nothing of the house, Mr. Snodgrass and his confusion stepped hastily back into the room he had just quitted and passing from thence into the inner apartment, Mr. Whartal's bedchamber closed the door softly, just as the persons he had caught a glimpse of entered the sitting room. These were Mr. Whartal, Mr. Pickwick, Mr. Nathaniel Winkle, and Mr. Benjamin Allen, whom he had no difficulty in recognizing by their voices. Very lucky I had the presence of mine to avoid them, thought Mr. Snodgrass with a smile and walking on tiptoe to another door near the bedside. This opens into the same passage, and I can walk quietly and comfortably away. There was only one obstacle to his walking quietly and comfortably away, which was that the door was locked and the key gone. Let us have some of your best wine today, waiter, said old Whartal, rubbing his hands. You shall have some of the very best, sir, replied the waiter. Let the ladies know we've come in. Yes, sir. Devoutly and ardently did Mr. Snodgrass wish that the ladies could know he had come in. He ventured once to whisper, waiter, through the keyhole, but as the probability of the wrong waiter coming to his relief flashed upon his mind, together with a sense of the strong resemblance between his own situation and that in which another gentleman had been recently found in a neighboring hotel, an account of his misfortunes had appeared under the head of police in the morning's paper, he sat himself on a portmanteau and trembled violently. We won't wait a minute for Parker, said Whartal, looking at his watch. He is always exact. He will not be here in time if he means to come. And if he does not, it's have no use waiting. Ha! Arabelle! My sister, exclaimed Mr. Benjamin Allen, folding her in a most romantic embrace. Open, dear, how you do smell of tobacco, said Arabelle, rather overcome by this mark of affection. Do I? said Mr. Benjamin Allen. Do I, bellow? Well, perhaps I do. Perhaps he did, having just left a pleasant little smoking party of 12 medical students in a small back parlor with a large fire. But I am delighted to see you, said Mr. Ben Allen. Bless you, bella. There, said Arabelle, bending forward to kiss her brother, don't take hold of me again, Ben, dear, because you tumble me so. At this point of the reconciliation, Mr. Ben Allen allowed his feelings and the cigars and porter to overcome him and looked round upon the beholders with damp spectacles. Is nothing to be said to me? cried Wardle with open arms. A great deal, whispered Arabelle as she received the old gentleman's hearty caress and congratulations.   People like you, who get married in spite of everybody, ought not to be let loose on society. But come, added the old gentleman aloud, here's the dinner. You shall sit by me. Joe, why, damn the boy, he's awake. To the great distress of the master the fat boy was indeed in a state of remarkable vigilance, his eyes being wide open and looking as if they intended to remain so. There was an alacrity in his manner, too, which was equally unaccountable. Every time his eyes met those of Emily or Arabelle, he smirked and grinned. Once Wardle could have sworn he's I'm wink. This altercation in the fat boy's demeanor originated in his incensed sense of his own importance and the dignity he acquired from having been taken into the confidence of the young ladies. And the smirks and grins and winks were so many condescending assurances that they might depend upon his fidelity. As these tokens were rather calculated to awaken suspicion than a liat, and were somewhat embarrassing besides, they were occasionally answered by a frown or shake of the head from Arabelle, which the fat boy, considering as hints to be on his guard, expressed his perfect understanding of by smirking, grinning, and dwinging with redoubled assiduity. Joe, said Mr. Wardle after an unsuccessful search in all his pockets, is my snuff mocks on the sofa.  What did you want to say? Demanded Wardle, shaking him. Stop, said Mr. Pickwick. Allow me. What did you wish to communicate to me, my poor boy?   Don't come near him. He's vicious. Ring the bell and let him be taken downstairs. Just as Mr. Winkle caught the bell rope in his hand, it was arrested by a general expression of astonishment. The captive lover, his face burning with confusion, suddenly walked in from the bedroom and made a comprehensive bow to the company. Hello, cried Wardle, releasing the fat boy's collar and staggering back. What's this? I have been concealed in the next room, sir, since you returned, exclaimed Mr. Snodgrass. Emily, my girl, said Wardle reproachfully. I detest meanness and deceit. This is unjustifiable and indelicate in the highest degree. I don't deserve this at your hands. Emily, indeed. Dear papa, said Emily. Erebella knows, everybody here knows, Joe knows, that I was no part to this concealment. Augustus, for heaven's sake, explain it. Mr. Snodgrass, who had only waited for a hearing, at once recounted how he had been placed in his then distressing predicament, how the fear of giving rise to domestic dissensions had alone prompted him to avoid Mr. Wardle on his entrance, how he merely meant to depart by another door, but finding it locked, had been compelled to stay against his will. It was a painful situation to be placed in, but he now regretted it in less, in as much as it afforded him an opportunity of acknowledging before their mutual friends that he loved Mr. Wardle's daughter deeply and sincerely, that he was proud to avow that the feeling was mutual, and that if thousands of miles were placed between them, or oceans rolled their waters, he could never for an instant forget those happy days when first, and so on. Having delivered himself to this effect, Mr. Snodgrass bowed again, looked into the crown of his hat, and stepped toward the door. Stop, shouted Wardle. Why in the name of all that's? Inflammable, mildly suggested Mr. Pickwick, who thought something worse was coming. Well, that's inflammable, said Wardle, adopting the substitute. Couldn't just say all this to me in the first instance? Or confide in me, added Mr. Pickwick. Oh, dear, said Arabella, taking up the defense. What is the use of asking all that now, especially when you know you had set your covetous old heart on a richer son-in-law, and are so wild and fierce besides that everybody is afraid of you except me? Shake hands with him and order him some dinner, for goodness gracious sakes, for he looks half starved, and pray, have your wine up at once, and you'll not be tolerable until you have taken two bottles at least. The worthy old gentleman pulled Arabella's ear, kissed her without the smallest scruple, kissed his daughter also with great affection, and shook Mr. Snodgrass warmly by the hand. She has right on one point at all events, said the old gentleman cheerfully, ring for the wine. The wine came, and Perker came upstairs at the same moment. Mr. Snodgrass had dinner at a side table, and when he had dispatched it, drew his chair next to Emily without the smallest opposition on the old gentleman's part. The evening was excellent. Little Mr. Perker came out wonderfully, told various comic stories, and sang a serious song, which was almost as funny as the anecdotes. Arabella was very charming. Mr. Wardle, very jovial. Mr. Pickwick, very harmonious. Mr. Ben Allen, very uproarious. The lovers very silent. Mr. Winkle very talkative, and all of them very happy. End of chapter 54, read by Patty Brugman. Chapter 55 of the Pickwick Papers. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please go to LibriVox.org. This recording by Patty Brugman. Chapter 55 of the Pickwick Papers. Mr. Solomon Pell, assisted by a select committee of coachmen, arranges the affairs of the elder Mr. Weller. Some of all, said Mr. Weller, accosting his son in the morning after the funeral, I found it, Sammy. I thought it was there. Thought what was where, inquired Sammy. Your mother-in-law's will, Sammy, replied Mr. Weller. In word to your wish, them arrangements is to be made, as I told you on last night, respecting the funds. What? Didn't she tell you where it was, inquired Sammy? Not a bit on it, Sammy, replied Mr. Weller. We was a jest in our little differences, and I was a cheer on her spirits and barren her up, so that I forgot to ask anything about it. I don't know, as I should have done it, indeed, if I had remembered it, said Mr. Weller. For it's our rum sort of thing, Sammy, to go a hinker and utter somebody's property when you're a sister-in-law in illness. It's like helping an outside passenger up when he's been pitched off a coach and putting your hand in his pocket while you ask him with a sigh how he finds himself, Sammy. With this figurative illustration of his meaning, Mr. Weller unclasped his pocketbook and drew forth a dirty sheet of letter paper on which were inscribed various characters crowded together in remarkable confusion. This here's the document, Sammy, said Mr. Weller.  She used to keep banknotes there before she was married, Semmelville. I've seen her take the lid off to pay a bill many a time, many a time. Poor creature. She might have filled all the teapots in the house with bills and not have inconvenienced herself, neither. For she took very little of anything in that way lately, except on the temperance nights when they just laid a foundation of tea to put the spirits atop on. What does it say, inquired Sam? Just what I told you, my boy, rejoined his parent. 200 pound worth of reduced counsels to my son-in-law Semmelville, and all the rest of my property are every kind in the scripture whatsoever to my husband, Mr. Tony Weller, who I appoint as my sole exitor. That's all, is it, said Sam? That's all, replied Mr. Weller. And I suppose it's all right and satisfactory to you and me, as it's only parties interested. We may as well put the paper into the fire. What are you doing on, you lunatic? Said Sam, stashing the paper away as his parent in all innocence stirred the fire preparatory to suiting the action to the word.  Find not, inquired Mr. Weller, looking sternly round with the poker at his hand. Find not, exclaimed Sam, because it might be proved and probated and swore to in all manner of formalities. You don't mean not, said Mr. Weller, laying down the poker. Sam buttoned the will carefully into a side pocket, intimating, by a look, meanwhile, that he did mean it, and very seriously, too. Then I'll tell you what it is, said Mr. Weller, after a short meditation. This is a case for their confidential pal, the chancellorship. Pell must look into the Sammy. He's the man for a difficult question at law. They'll have this here brought before the solvent court directly, Sammable. I never did see such an adult-headed old creature, exclaimed Sam irritably. Old Baileys and solvent courts and alley-bys and every sort of gammon all the way is running through his brain. You'd better get your out-of-door clothes on and come to town about this business, then stand a preaching there about what you don't understand nothing on. Well, we're good, Sammy, replied Mr. Weller. I'm quite agreeable to anything as will hexpidite business, Sammy. But mindless here, my boy, nobody but Pell. Nobody but Pell as a legal advisor. I don't want anybody else, replied Sam. Now are you coming? Veta minute, Sammy, replied Mr. Weller, who, having tied his shawl with the aid of a small glass that hung in the window, was now by dint of the most wonderful exertions struggling into his upper garments.  If I couldn't get into it any easier than that, I'm blessed if I'd wear one at all, rejoined his son. You think so now, said Mr. Weller, with the gravity of age, but you'll find that as you get the victor, you'll get the visor. With and wisdom, Sammy always glows together. As Mr. Weller delivered this infallible maxim, the result of many years' personal experience and observation, he contrived by a dexterous twist of his body to get the bottom button of his coat to perform its office. Having paused a few seconds to recover breath, he brushed his hat with his elbow and declared himself ready. As for heads is better than two, Sammy, said Mr. Weller as they drove along the London road in a chase cart, and as all this here property is a very great temptation to a legal gentleman, we'll take a couple of friends of mine with us, as we'll be wary soon down upon him if anything regular. Two of them, as saw you to the fleets that day, that are very best judges, added Mr. Weller in a half whisper, the very best judges of a horse you ever knowed. And if a lawyer too, inquired Sam, the man is can form accurate judgment of an animal, can form an accurate judgment of anything, replied his father so dogmatically that Sam did not attempt to controvert this position. In pursuance of this notable resolution, the services of the model-faced gentleman and of two other very fat coachmen selected by Mr. Weller, probably with a view to their wit and consequent wisdom, were put into requisition, and this assistance having been secured, the party proceeded to the public house in Portugal Street. Once a messenger was dispatched to the insolvent court over the way, requiring Mr. Solomon Pell's immediate attendance. The messenger fortunately found Mr. Solomon Pell in court, regaling himself, business being rather slack, with the cold collation of an Abernathy biscuit and a salvaloi. The message was no sooner whispered in his ear than he thrust them in his pocket among various professional documents, and hurried over the way with such a lacquerty that he reached the parlor before the messenger had even emancipated himself from the court. Gentlemen, said Mr. Pell, touching his hat, my service to you all. I don't say it to flatter you gentlemen, but there are not five other men in the world that I have come out to the court for today. So busy, said Zem. Busy, replied Pell. I'm completely sewn up, as my friend the late Lord Chancellor, many a time used to say to me gentlemen, when he came out from hearing appeals in the house of Lords, poor fellow, he was very susceptible of fatigue. He used to feel those appeals uncommonly. I actually thought more than once that he'd have sunk under him. I did indeed. Here Mr. Pell shook his head and paused, on which the elder Mr. Weller, nudging his neighbor, as begging him to mark the attorney's high connections, asked whether the duties in question produced any permanent ill effects on the constitution of his noble friend. I don't think he ever quite recovered them, replied Pell. In fact, I'm sure he never did. Pell, he used to say to me many a time, how the blazes can you stand? The headwork you do is a mystery to me. Well, I used to answer, I hardly know how I do it upon my life. Pell, he'd add, sighing and looking at me with a little envy. Friendly envy, you know gentlemen, mere friendly envy. I never minded it.  Ah, you'd have liked him very much if you had known him, gentlemen. Bring me three penny-fourth of rum, my dear. Addressing this latter remark to the witness in a tone of subdued grief, Mr. Pell sighed, looked at his shoes and the ceiling, and the rum having, by that time, arrived, drunk it up. However, said Pell, drawing a chair to the table, a professional man has no right to think of his private friendships when his legal assistance is wanted. Bye, they-bye, gentlemen. Since I saw you here before, we have had to weep over a very melancholy occurrence. Mr. Pell drew out a pocket handkerchief when he came to the word weep, but he made no further use of it than to wipe away a slight tinge of rum which hung upon his upper lip. I sought in the advisor, Mr. Weller, continued Pell, bless my soul, not more than fifty-two, dear me, only think. These indications of amusing spirit were addressed to the model-faced man, whose eyes Mr. Pell had accidentally caught, on which the model-faced man, his apprehension of matters in general was of a foggy nature, moved uneasily to the seat that opened him. Indeed, so far as that went, and there was no saying how things was brought about, which observation involving one of those subtle propositions, which it is difficult to encounter, argument was controverted by nobody. I have heard it remarked that she was a very fine woman, Mr. Weller, said Pell in a sympathizing manner. Yes, sir, she was, replied the elder, Mr. Weller, not much relishing this mode of discussing the subject, and yet thinking that the attorney from his long intimacy with the late Lord Chancellor must know best on all matters of polite breeding. She was a very fine woman, sir. Then I first knowed her. She was a widower, sir, at that time. Now it is curious, said Pell, looking round with a sorrowful smile. Mrs. Pell was a widow. That is very extraordinary, said the model-faced man. Well, it is a curious coincidence, said Pell. Not at all, graphically remarked the elder, Mr. Weller, more widows is married than single women. Very good, very good, said Pell. You're quite right, Mr. Weller. Mrs. Pell was a very elegant and accomplished woman. Her manners were the theme of universal admiration in our neighborhood. I was proud to see that woman dance. There was something so firm and dignified and yet natural in her motion. Her cutting, gentlemen, was simply itself. Ah, well, well, excuse me, asking the question, Mr. Somerville, continued the attorney in a lower voice. Was your mother-in-law tall? Not wary, replied Sam. Mrs. Pell was a tall figure, said Pell.  She was very much attached to me very much, highly connected to. Her mother's brother, gentlemen, failed for eight hundred pounds as a law stationer. Well, said Mr. Weller, who had grown rather restless during this discussion, fit regards to business. The word was music to Pell's ears. He had been resolving in his mind whether any business was to be transacted or whether he had been merely invited to partake of a glass of brandy and water or a bowl of punch or any similar professional compliment. And now the doubt was set at rest without his appearing at all eager for its solution. His eyes glistened as he laid his hat on the table and said, What is the business upon him? Either of these gentlemen wish to go through the court? We require an arrest. A friendly arrest will do, you know. All friends here, I suppose. Give me the documents, Sammy, said Mr. Weller, taking the will from his son who appeared to enjoy the interview amazingly. What we require, sir, is a probe of this year. Probate, my dear sir, probate, said Pell. Well, sir, replied Mr. Weller sharply, probe and probe is very much the same. If you don't understand what I mean, sir, I can find them as does. No offence, I hope, Mr. Weller, said Pell meekly.  I am, sir, replied Mr. Weller. These other gentlemen, I presume, are legates, are they? Inquired Pell with a congratulatory smile. Sammy is a legates, replied Mr. Weller. These other gentlemen is friends of mine. We just come to see fair are kind of umpires. Oh, said Mr. Pell, very good, I have no objections, I'm sure. I shall want a matter of five pounds of you before I begin. Ha, ha, ha! It being decided by the committee that the five pound might be advanced, Mr. Weller produced that sum, after which a long consultation about nothing in particular took place. In the course whereof Mr. Pell demonstrated the perfect satisfaction of the gentleman who saw fair that unless the management of the business had been entrusted to him it must all have gone wrong for reasons not clearly made out, but no doubt sufficient. This important point being dispatched, Mr. Pell refreshed himself with three chops and liquids both malt and spiritus and the expense of the estate, and then they all went away to Doctor's Commons. The next day there was another visit to the Doctor's Commons and a great to-do with an attesting hosteler who being inebriated declined swearing anything but profane oaths to the great scandal of a proctor and surrogate. Next week there were more visits to Doctor's Commons and there was a visit to the Legacy Duty Office besides, and there were treaties entered into for the disposal of the lease and business and ratifications of the same and inventories to be made out and lunches to be taken and dinners to be eaten and so many profitable things to be done and such a mass of papers accumulated that Mr. Solomon Pell and a boy and the blue bag to boot all got so stout that scarcely anybody would have known them for the same man, boy, and bag that had loitered about Portugal Street a few days before. At length all these weighty matters being arranged a day was fixed for selling out and transferring the stock and of waiting with that view upon Wilkins, Flasher, ESQ, stockbroker of somewhere near the bank who had been recommended by Mr. Solomon Pell for the purpose. It was a kind of festivation and the parties were attired accordingly. Mr. Weller's tops were newly cleaned and his dress was arranged with particular care. The model-faced gentleman wore at his buttonhole a full-sized dahlia with several leaves and the coats of his two friends were adorned with nosegays and laurel and other evergreens. All three were habited in strict holiday costume that is to say they were wrapped up to the chins and wore as many clothes as possible which is and has been a stage coachman's idea of full dress ever since stagecoaches were invented. Mr. Pell was waiting at the usual place of meeting at the appointed time. Even Mr. Pell wore a pair of gloves and a clean shirt much frayed at the collar and wristbands by frequent washings. A quarter to two said Pell looking at the parlor clock, if we are with Mr. Flasher at a quarter past we shall just hit the best time. What should you say to a drop of beer gentlemen? suggested the model-faced gentleman. And a little bit of cold beef said the second coachman. Oran Oyster added the third who was a horse gentleman supported by very round legs. Here, here said Pell to congratulate Mr. Weller on his coming into possession of his property. I'm quite agreeable gentlemen answered Mr. Weller. Sami pulled well. Sam complied and the porter, cold beef and oysters being promptly produced the lunch was done ample justice to. Where everybody took so active a part it is almost invidious to make a distinction. But if one individual evinced greater powers than another it was the coachman with the horse voice who took an imperial pint of vinegar with his oysters without betraying the lease to motion. Mr. Pell sir said the elder Mr. Weller stirring a glass of brandy and water of which one was placed before every gentleman when the oyster shells were removed. Mr. Pell sir it was my intention to have proposed the funds on the occasion but Samaville has whispered to me here Mr. Samuel Weller who had silently eaten his oysters with tranquil smiles cried here in a very loud voice has whispered to me resumed his father that it would be better to do what the liquor to vision you success and prosperity and thanking you for the manner in which you have brought this here business through here's to your health sir hold hard there interpose the model face gentlemen with a sudden urgency your eyes on me gentlemen say in this the model face gentlemen rose and did the other gentlemen the model face gentlemen reviewed the company and slowly lifted his hand upon which every man including him of the model to countenance drew a long breath and lifted his tumbler to his lips in one instant the model face gentlemen depressed his hand again and every glass was set down empty it is impossible to describe the thrilling effect produced by this striking ceremony at once dignified, solemn and impressive you can bind every element of grandeur well gentlemen said Mr. Pell all I can say is that such marks of confidence must be very gratifying to a professional man I don't wish to say anything that might appear egotistical gentlemen but I'm very glad for your own sakes that you came to see me that is all if you had gone to any law member of the profession it's my firm conviction and I assure you of it as a fact that you would have found yourselves in queer street before this I could have wished my noble friend that had been alive to have seen my management of this case I don't say it out of pride but I think however gentlemen I won't trouble you with that I'm generally to be found here gentlemen but if I'm not here or over the way that's my address I find my terms very cheap and reasonable and no man attends more to his clients than I do and I hope I know a little of my profession besides if you have any opportunity of recommending me to any of your friends gentlemen I shall be very much obliged to you and so will they too when they come to know me your health gentlemen with this expression of his feelings Mr. Solomon Pell laid three small written cards Mr. Weller's friends and looking at the clock again feared it was time to be walking upon this hint Mr. Weller settled the bill and issuing forth the executor, legatee, attorney and umpires directed their steps toward the city the office of Wilkins Flasher Esquire of the exchange was in a first floor up a court behind the Bank of England the house of Wilkins Flasher Esquire was at Brixton Surrey the horse and stan hope of Wilkins Flasher Esquire were at an adjacent livery stable the groom of Wilkins Flasher Esquire was on his way to West End to deliver some game the clerk of Wilkins Flasher Esquire had gone to his dinner and so Wilkins Flasher Esquire himself cried come in when Mr. Pell and his companions knocked at the courting house door good morning sir said Mr. Pell bowing obsequiously we want to make a little transfer if you please oh come in will you said Mr. Flasher sit down a minute I'll attend to you directly thank you sir said Mr. Pell there's no hurry take a chair Mr. Weller Mr. Weller took a chair and Sam took a box and the umpires took what they could get and looked at the almanac and one or two papers which were wafered against the wall with as much open-eyed reverence as if they had been the finest efforts of the old masters well I'll bet you have a dozen claret on it come said Wilkins Flasher Esquire resuming the conversation to which Mr. Pell's entrance had caused a momentary interruption this was addressed to a very smart young gentleman who wore his hat on his right whisker and was lounging over the desk killing flies with a ruler Wilkins Flasher Esquire was balancing himself on two legs of an office stool spearing a wafer box with a pen knife which he dropped every now and then with great dexterity into the very center of a small red wafer that was stuck outside both gentlemen had very open waistcoats and very rolling collars and very small boots and very big rings and very little watches and very large guard chains and symmetrical inexpressibles and scented pocket handkerchiefs I never bet half a dozen said the other gentleman I'll take a dozen Done, simmery, done! said Wilkins Flasher Esquire Pee-pee, mind! observed the other Of course, replied Wilkins Flasher Esquire Wilkins Flasher Esquire entered it in a little book with a gold pencil case and the other gentleman entered it also in another little book with another gold pencil case I see there's a notice up this morning about wafer observed Mr. Simmery Poor devil he's expelled the house I'll bet you ten guineas to five he cuts his throat said Wilkins Flasher Esquire Done, replied Mr. Simmery Stop, I bar! said Wilkins Flasher Esquire thoughtfully Perhaps he may hang himself Very good rejoined Mr. Simmery pulling out his gold pencil case again I have no objection to take you that way say makes away with himself kills himself in fact said Wilkins Flasher Esquire Just so replied Mr. Simmery putting it down Flasher ten guineas to five buffer kills himself Within what time shall we say? A fortnight suggested Wilkins Flasher Esquire Confound it, no rejoined Mr. Simmery stopping for an instant to smash a fly with the ruler So weak Split the difference said Wilkins Flasher Esquire Make it ten days Well, ten days rejoined Mr. Simmery So it was entered down in the little books that Buffer was to kill himself within ten days or Wilkins Flasher Esquire was to hand over Frank Simmery Esquire the sum of ten guineas and that if Buffer did kill himself within that time Frank Simmery Esquire would pay to Wilkins Flasher Esquire five guineas instead I'm very sorry he has failed said Wilkins Flasher Esquire Capital dinners he gave Fine port he had too remarked Mr. Simmery We are going to send our butler to the sale tomorrow to pick up some five of that sixty-four That devil-yard said Wilkins Flasher Esquire my man's going to five guineas my man outbids your man Done Another entry was made in the little books with the gold pencil cases and Mr. Simmery having by this time killed all the flies and taken all the bets stalled away to the stock exchange to see what was going forward Wilkins Flasher Esquire now condescended to receive Mr. Solomon Pell's instructions and having filed up some printed forms requested the party to follow him to the bank which they did Mr. Weller and his three friends staring at all they beheld in unbounded astonishment and Sam encountering everything with the coolness which nothing could disturb Crossing a courtyard which was all noise and bustle and passing a couple of porters who seemed dressed to match the red fire engine which was wheeled away into a corner they passed into an office where their business was to be transacted and where Pell and Mr. Flasher left them standing for a few moments while they went upstairs into the will office What place is this here? whispered the mottled-faced gentleman to the elderly Mr. Weller Council's office replied the executor and whisper What are those gentlemen set in behind the counters? asked the hoarseed coachman Reduced cancels I suppose replied Mr. Weller Ain't they reduced cancels some of all? Why you don't suppose the reduced cancels is alive do you? inquired Sam with some disdain How should I know? retorted Mr. Weller I thought they look very like it What are they then? clerks replied Sam What are they all I eatin' hams and weaches for? inquired his father Cos it's their duty I suppose replied Sam It's a part of the system they're always doing it here all day long Mr. Weller and his friends had scarcely had a moment to reflect upon this singular regulation with the monetary system of the country when they were rejoined by Pell and Wilkins Flasher Esquire who led them to a part of the counter above which was a round black board with a large W on it that for inquired Mr. Weller directing Pell's attention to the target in question the first letter of the name of the deceased replied Pell I say said Mr. Weller turning round to the umpires there's something wrong here W's our letter this won't do the referees at once gave it their decided opinion that the business could not be legally preceded with under the letter W and in all probability it would have stood over for one day at least had it not been for the prompt though at first sight dutiful behavior of Sam who seizing his father by the skirt of the coat to the counter and pinned him there until he had fixed his signature to a couple of instruments which from Mr. Weller's habit of printing was a work of so much labor and time that the officiating clerk peeled and ate three Ribston Pippins while it was performing as the elder Mr. Weller insisted on selling out his portion forthwith they proceeded from the bank to the gate of the stock exchange to which Wilkins Flasher Esquire after a short absence returned with a check on Smith Payne and Smith for five hundred and thirty pounds that being the sum of money to which Mr. Weller at the market price of the day was entitled in consideration of the balance of the second Mrs. Weller's fund and savings Sam's two hundred pounds to transfer to his name and Wilkins Flasher Esquire having been paid his commission dropped the money carelessly and lounged back to his office Mr. Weller was at first obstinately determined on cashing the check in nothing but sovereigns but it being represented by the umpires that by doing so he must incur the expense of a small sack to carry them home in he consented to receive the amount in five pound notes my son said Mr. Weller as they came out of the banking house my son and me has a webby particular engagement this afternoon and I should like to have this your business settled out of hand so let's just go straight away somewhere where we can hold it to the accounts a quiet room was soon found and the accounts were produced and audited Mr. Pell's bill was taxed by Sam and some charges were disallowed by the umpires but notwithstanding Mr. Pell's declaration accompanied with many solemn observations that they were really too hard upon him because by very many degrees the best professional job he had ever had and one on which he boarded lodged and washed for six months afterwards the umpires having partaken of a dram shook hands and departed as they had to drive out of town that night Mr. Solomon Pell finding that nothing more was going forward either in the eating or drinking way took a friendly leave and Sam and his father were left alone there said Mr. Weller thrusting his pocketbook and his side pocket with the bills for the lease and that there's eleven hundred and eighty pound here now some of all my boy turn the horse's heads to the George and Wilford end of chapter fifty-five read by Patty Brugman chapter fifty-sixth of the Pickwick papers this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Debra Lynn the Pickwick papers by Charles Dickens chapter fifty-six an important conference takes place between Mr. Pickwick and Samuel Weller at which his parent assists an old gentleman in a snuff-colored suit arrives unexpectedly Mr. Pickwick was sitting alone musing over many things and thinking among other considerations how he could best provide for the young couple whose present unsettled condition was matter of constant regret and anxiety to him when Mary stepped lightly into the room and advancing to the table said rather hastily oh if you please sir Samuel is downstairs and he says may his father see you surely replied Mr. Pickwick thank you sir said Mary looking towards the door again Sam has not been here long has he inquired Mr. Pickwick oh no sir replied Mary eagerly he has only just come home he is not going to ask you for any more leave sir he says Mary might have been conscious that she had communicated this last intelligence with more warmth than seemed actually necessary or she might have observed a good humored smile with which Mr. Pickwick regarded her when she had finished speaking she certainly held down her head and examined the corner of a very smart little apron with more closeness than there appeared any absolute occasion for tell them they can come up at once by all means said Mr. Pickwick Mary apparently much relieved hurried away with her message Mr. Pickwick took two or three turns up and down the room and rubbing his chin with his left hand as he did so appeared lost in thought well said Mr. Pickwick at length in a kind but somewhat melancholy tone it is the best way in which I could reward him for his attachment and fidelity let it be so in heaven's name it is the fate of a lonely old man that those about him should form new and different attachments and leave him I have no right to expect that it should be otherwise with me no no added Mr. Pickwick more cheerfully it would be selfish and ungrateful I ought to be happy to have an opportunity of providing for him so well I am of course I am Mr. Pickwick had been so absorbed in these reflections that a knock at the door was three or four times repeated before he heard it hastily seating himself and calling up his accustomed pleasant looks he gave the required permission and Sam Weller entered followed by his father glad to see you back again Sam said Mr. Pickwick how do you do Mr. Weller very hardy thank you sir replied the widower hope I see you well sir quite I thank you replied Mr. Pickwick I wanted to have a little bit of conversation with you sir said Mr. Weller if you could spare me five minutes or so sir certainly replied Mr. Pickwick Sam give your father a chair thank you Samable I've got a cheer here said Mr. Weller bringing one forward as he spoke uncommon fine day it's been sir added the old gentleman laying his hat on the floor as he sat himself down remarkably so indeed replied Mr. Pickwick very seasonable seasonablest weather I ever see sir rejoined Mr. Weller here the old gentleman was seized with a violent fit of coughing which being terminated he nodded his head and winked and made several supplicatory all of which Sam Weller steadily abstained from seeing Mr. Pickwick perceiving that there was some embarrassment on the old gentleman's part affected to be engaged in cutting the leaves of a book that lay beside him and waited patiently until Mr. Weller should arrive at the object of his visit I never see such an aggravating boy as you are Samable said Mr. Weller looking indignantly at his son never in all my born days what is he doing Mr. Weller inquired Mr. Pickwick he won't begin sir rejoined Mr. Weller he knows I ain't equal to expressing myself when there's anything particular to be done and yet he'll stand and see me as sitting here taking up your wallible time and making a regular spectacle of myself rather than help me out with a syllable it ain't filial conduct Samable said Mr. Weller wiping his forehead very far from it you said you'd speak replied Sam how should I know you was done up at the very beginning you might have seen I weren't able to start rejoined his father I'm on the wrong side of the road and back and into the palins in all manner of unpleasantness and yet you won't put out a hand to help me I'm ashamed on you Samable the fact is sir said Sam with a slight bow the governor's been a drawing his money very good Samable very good said Mr. Weller nodding his head with a satisfied air I didn't mean to speak harsh to you Sammy very good that's the way to begin come to the pint at once very good indeed Samable Mr. Weller nodded his head an extraordinary number of times in the excess of his gratification and waited in a listening attitude for Sam to resume his statement you may sit down Sam said Mr. Pickwick apprehending that the interview was likely to prove rather longer than he had expected Sam bowed again and sat down his father looking round he continued the governor sir has drawn out five hundred and thirty pound reduced counsels interposed Mr. Weller senior in an undertone it don't much matter whether it's reduced counsels or what not said Sam five hundred and thirty pounds is the sum ain't it? All right Samable replied Mr. Weller to which sum he has added for the house and business lease Goodville stock and fixtures interposed Mr. Weller as much as makes it continued Sam all together eleven hundred and eighty pound indeed said Mr. Pickwick I am delighted to hear it I congratulate you Mr. Weller on having done so well wait a minute sir said Mr. Weller raising his hand in a deprecatory manner get on Samable he said Sam with a little hesitation he's anxious to put some bears where he knows it'll be safe and I'm very anxious too for if he keeps it he'll go lending it to somebody or in western property and horses or dropping his pocketbook down an airy or making an Egyptian mummy of his self in some way or another very good Samable observed Mr. Weller in his complacent manner as if Sam had been passing the highest geologiums on his prudence and foresight very good for which reasons continued Sam plucking nervously at the brim of his hat for which reasons he's drawn it out today and come here with me to say least ways to offer or in other words to say this here said the elder Mr. Weller impatiently that it ain't of no use to me I'm going to work a coach regular and ain't got no bears to keep it unless I was to pay the guard for taking care in it or to put it in one of the coach pockets which would be a temptation to the insides if you'll take care in it for me sir I shall be very much obliged to you perhaps said Mr. Weller walking up to Mr. Pickwick and whispering in his ear perhaps it'll go a little towards the expenses of that air conwiction all I'd say is just you keep it till I ask you for it again with these words Mr. Weller placed the pocketbook in Mr. Pickwick's hands caught up his hat and ran out of the room with a celerity scarcely to be expected from so corpulent a subject stop him Sam exclaimed Mr. Pickwick earnestly overtake him bring him back instantly Mr. Weller here come back Sam saw that his master's injunctions were not to be disobeyed and catching his father by the arm as he was descending the stairs dragged him back by main force my good friend taking the old man by the hand your honest confidence overpowers me I don't see no occasion for nothing of the kind sir replied Mr. Weller obstinately I assure you my good friend I have more money than I can ever need far more than a man at my age can ever live to spend said Mr. Pickwick no man knows how much he can spend till he tries observed Mr. Weller perhaps not replied Mr. Pickwick with the intention of trying any such experiments I am not likely to come to want I must beg you to take this back Mr. Weller very well said Mr. Weller with a discontented look mark my words Sammy I'll do something desperate with this here property something desperate you'd better not replied Sam Mr. Weller reflected for a short time and then buttoning up his coat with great determination said I'll keep a pike exclaimed Sam a pike rejoined Mr. Weller through his set teeth I'll keep a pike said goodbye to your father Samofl I do vote the remainder of my days to a pike this threat was such an awful one and Mr. Weller besides appearing fully resolved to carry it into execution seemed so deeply mortified by Mr. Pickwick's refusal that that gentleman after a short reflection said well well Mr. Weller I will keep your money I can do more good with it perhaps than you can just the wary thing to be sure said Mr. Weller brightening up of course you can sir say no more about it said Mr. Pickwick locking the pocketbook in his desk I am hardly obliged to you my good friend now sit down again I want to ask your advice the internal laughter occasioned by the triumphant success of his visit which it convulsed not only Mr. Weller's face but his arms legs and body also during the locking up of the pocketbook suddenly gave place to the most dignified gravity as he heard these words wait outside a few minutes Sam will you said Mr. Pickwick Sam immediately withdrew Mr. Weller looked uncommonly wise and very much amazed when Mr. Pickwick opened the discourse by saying you are not an advocate for matrimony I think Mr. Weller Mr. Weller shook his head he was wholly unable to speak vague thoughts of some wicked widow having been successful in her designs on Mr. Pickwick choked his utterance did you happen to see a young girl downstairs when you came in just now with your son inquired Mr. Pickwick yes I see a young gal replied Mr. Weller shortly what did you think of her now candidly Mr. Weller what did you think of her I thought she was very plump and well made said Mr. Weller what did you think of Mr. Pickwick so she is what did you think of her manners from what you saw of her very pleasant rejoined Mr. Weller very pleasant and conformable the precise meaning which Mr. Weller attached to this last mentioned adjective did not appear but as it was evident from the tone in which he used it that it was a favorable expression Mr. Pickwick was as well satisfied as if he had been thoroughly enlightened in his project I take a great interest in her Mr. Weller said Mr. Pickwick Mr. Weller coughed I mean an interest in her doing well resumed Mr. Pickwick a desire that she may be comfortable and prosperous you understand very clearly replied Mr. Weller who understood nothing yet that young person said Mr. Pickwick is attached to your son to Sam of Oveller yes said Mr. Pickwick it's natural said Mr. Weller after some consideration natural but rather alarming Sammy must be careful how do you mean inquired Mr. Pickwick very careful that he don't say nothing to her responded Mr. Weller very careful that he ain't let of a in an innocent moment to say innocent as may lead to a conviction for breach you never say that Mr. Pickwick and if once has designs on you there's no known where to have them and while you're a consideran of it they have you I was married first that way myself sir and Sammy was the consequence of the maneuver you give me no great encouragement to conclude what I have to say observed Mr. Pickwick but I had better do so at once this young person is not only attached to your son Mr. Weller but your son is attached to her well Mr. Weller this here is a pretty sort of thing to come to a father's years this is I have observed them on several occasions said Mr. Pickwick making no comment on Mr. Weller's last remark and entertain no doubt at all about it supposing I were desirous of establishing them comfortably as man and wife in some little business or situation where they might hope to obtain a decent living what should you think of it Mr. Weller at first Mr. Weller received with wry faces a proposition involving the marriage of anybody in whom he took an interest but as Mr. Pickwick argued the point with him and laid great stress on the fact that Mary was not a widow he gradually became more tractable Mr. Pickwick had great influence over him and he had been much struck with Mary's appearance having in fact bestowed several very unfathorily winks upon her already at length he said that it was not for him to oppose Mr. Pickwick's inclination and that he would be very happy to yield to his advice upon which Mr. Pickwick joyfully took him at his word and called Sam back into the room Sam said Mr. Pickwick clearing his throat your father and I have been having some conversation about you about you Sammelville said Mr. Weller in a patronizing and impressive voice you're lying Sam is not to have seen a long time since that you entertain something more than a friendly feeling toward Mrs. Winkle's maid said Mr. Pickwick you hear this Sammelville said Mr. Weller in the same judicial form of speeches before I hope sir said Sam addressing his master I hope there's no harm in a young man taking notice of a young woman as his undeniably good looking and well conducted certainly not by no means acquiesce Mr. Weller affably but magisterially so far from thinking there is anything wrong in conduct so natural resumed Mr. Pickwick it is my wish to assist and promote your wishes in this respect with this view I have had a little conversation with your father and finding that he is of my opinion the lady not being a witter interposed Mr. Weller in explanation the lady not being a widow said Mr. Pickwick smiling I wish to free you from the restraint which your present position imposes upon you and to mark my sense of your fidelity in many excellent qualities by enabling you to marry this girl at once and to earn an independent livelihood for yourself and family I shall be proud Sam said Mr. Pickwick whose voice had faltered a little hitherto but now resumed its customary tone proud and happy to make your future prospects in life my grateful and peculiar care there was a profound silence for a short time and then Sam said in a low husky sort of voice but firmly with awe I am very much obliged to you for your goodness sir as is only like yourself but it can't be done can't be done ejaculated Mr. Pickwick in astonishment Sam of all said Mr. Weller with dignity I say it can't be done repeated Sam in a louder key what's to become of you sir my good fellow replied Mr. Pickwick the recent changes among my friends will alter my mode of life in future entirely besides I am growing older and want repose and quiet my rambles Sam are over how do I know that air sir argued Sam you think so now suppose you was to change your mind which is not unlikely for you have the spirit of five and twenty and you still what had become of you without me it can't be done sir it can't be done very good Sam of all there's a good deal in that said Mr. Weller encouragingly I speak after long deliberation Sam and with the certainty that I shall keep my word said Mr. Pickwick shaking his head new scenes have closed upon me my rambles are at an end very good rejoined Sam then that's the very best reason why you should always have somebody by you as understand you to keep you up and make you comfortable if you want a more polished sort of fellow well and good have him but wages are no wages notice or no notice board or no board lodging or no lodging Sam Veller as you took from the old in in the borough sticks by you come what may and let everything and everybody do their very fiercest nothing shall ever pervade at the close of this declaration which Sam made with great emotion the elder Mr. Weller rose from his chair and for getting all considerations of time place or propriety waved his head above his head and gave three vehement cheers my good fellow said Mr. Pickwick when Mr. Weller had sat down again rather abashed at his own enthusiasm you are bound to consider the young woman also I do consider the young woman sir Sam I have considered young woman I've spoke to her I've told her how unsidivated she's ready to wait till I'm ready and I believe she will if she don't she's not the young woman I take her for and I give her up with readiness you've known me a forester my mind's made up and nothing can ever alter it who could combat this resolution not Mr. Pickwick he derived at that moment more pride and luxury of feeling this interested attachment of his humble friends than 10,000 protestations from the greatest men living could have awakened in his heart while this conversation was passing in Mr. Pickwick's room a little old gentleman in a suit of snuff colored clothes followed by a porter carrying a small portmanteau presented himself below and after securing a bed for the night inquired of the waiter whether one Mrs. Winkle was staying there and the waiter of course responded in the affirmative is she alone inquired the old gentleman I believe she is sir replied the waiter I can call her own maid sir if you no I don't want her said the old gentleman quickly show me to her room without announcing me a sir said the waiter are you deaf inquired a little old gentleman no sir then listen if you please can you hear me now yes sir that's well show me to Mrs. Winkle's room without announcing me as the little old gentleman uttered this command he slipped five shillings into the waiter's hand and looked steadily at him really sir said the waiter I don't know sir whether ah you'll do it I see said the little old gentleman you had better do it at once it will save time there was something so very cool and collected in the gentleman's manner put the five shillings in his pocket and let him upstairs without another word this is the room is it said the gentleman you may go the waiter complied wondering much who the gentleman could be and what he wanted the little old gentleman waiting till he was out of sight tapped at the door come in said Arabella ah I'm a pretty voice at any rate murmured the little old gentleman but that's nothing opened the door and walked in Arabella who was sitting at work rose unbeholding a stranger a little confused but by no means ungracefully so pray don't rise ma'am said the unknown walking in and closing the door after him Mrs. Winkle I believe Arabella inclined her head Mrs. Nathaniel Winkle who married the son of the old man at Birmingham said the stranger eyeing Arabella with visible curiosity again Arabella inclined her head and looked on easily round as if uncertain whether to call for assistance I surprise you I see ma'am said the old gentleman rather I confess replied Arabella wondering more and more I'll take a chair if you'll allow me ma'am said the stranger he took one and drawing a spectacle case from his pocket leisurely pulled out a pair of spectacles which he adjusted on his nose you don't know me ma'am looking so intently at Arabella that she began to feel alarmed no sir she replied timidly no said the gentleman nursing his left leg I don't know how you should you know my name no ma'am do I? said Arabella trembling though she scarcely knew why may I ask what it is presently ma'am presently said the stranger not having yet removed his eyes from her countenance you have been recently married ma'am I have replied Arabella in a scarcely audible tone laying aside her work and becoming greatly agitated as a thought that had occurred to her before struck more forcibly upon her mind without having represented to your husband the propriety of first consulting his father on whom he is dependent I think said the stranger Arabella applied her handkerchief to her eyes without an endeavor even to ascertain by some indirect appeal what were the old man's sentiments on a point in which he would naturally feel much interested said the stranger I cannot deny it sir said Arabella and without having sufficient property of your own to afford your husband any permanent assistance in exchange for the worldly advantages which you knew he would have gained if he had married agreeably gentlemen this is what boys and girls call disinterested affection till they have boys and girls of their own and then they see it in a rougher and very different light Arabella's tears flowed fast as she pleaded in extenuation that she was young and inexperienced that her attachment had alone induced her to take the step to which she had resorted and that she had been deprived of the counsel and guidance of her parents almost from infancy it was wrong said the old gentleman in a milder tone very wrong it was romantic unbusiness like foolish it was my fault all my fault sir replied poor Arabella weeping nonsense said the old gentleman it was not your fault that he fell in love with you I suppose yes it was though said the old gentleman looking rather slyly at Arabella it was your fault he couldn't help it this little compliment or the little gentleman's odd way of paying it or his altered manner so much kinder than it was at first or all three together forced a smile from Arabella in the midst of her tears where's your husband inquired the old gentleman abruptly stopping a smile which was just coming over his own face I expect him every instant sir said Arabella I persuaded him to take a walk this morning he was very low and wretched at not having heard from his father low is he said the old gentleman serve him right he feels it on my account I am afraid said Arabella and indeed sir I feel it deeply on his I have been the sole means of bringing him to his present condition don't mind it on his account my dear said the old gentleman it serves him right I am glad of it actually glad of it as far as he is concerned the words were scarcely out of the old gentleman's lips when footsteps were heard ascending the stairs which he and Arabella seemed both to recognize at the same moment the little gentleman turned pale and making a strong effort to appear composed stood up as Mr. Winkle entered the room father cried Mr. Winkle recoiling in amazement yes sir replied the little old gentleman well sir what have you got to say to me Mr. Winkle remained silent you are ashamed of yourself I hope sir said the old gentleman still Mr. Winkle said nothing are you ashamed of yourself sir or are you not inquired the old gentleman no sir replied Mr. Winkle drawing Arabella's arm through his I am not ashamed of myself or of my wife either upon my word cried the old gentleman ironically I am very sorry to have done anything which has lessened your affection for me sir said Mr. Winkle but I will say at the same time that I have no reason to be ashamed of having this lady for my wife nor you of having her for a daughter give me your hand Nat said the old gentleman in an altered voice kiss me my love you are a very charming little daughter in law after all in a few minutes time Mr. Pickwick and returning with that gentleman presented him to his father whereupon they shook hands for five minutes incessantly Mr. Pickwick I thank you most heartily for all your kindness to my son said old Mr. Winkle in a bluff straightforward way I am a hasty fellow and when I saw you last I was vexed and taken by surprise I have judged for myself now and am more than satisfied shall I make any more apologies Mr. Pickwick I replied that gentleman you have done the only thing wanting to complete my happiness hereupon there was another shaking of hands for five minutes longer accompanied by a great number of complimentary speeches which besides being complimentary had the additional and very novel recommendation of being sincere Sam had dutifully seen his father to the bell's savage when on returning he encountered the fat boy in the court with the delivery of a note from Emily Wardle I say said Joe who was unusually loquacious what a pretty girl Mary is isn't she I am so fond of her I am Mr. Weller made no verbal remark in reply but eyeing the fat boy for a moment quite transfixed at his presumption let him by the collar to the corner and dismissed him with a harmless but ceremonious kick after which he walked home whistling end of Chapter 56 Chapter 57 of the Pickwick Papers this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Deborah Lynn the Pickwick Papers by Charles Dickens Chapter 57 in which the Pickwick Club is finally resolved and everything concluded to the satisfaction of everybody for a whole week after the happy arrival of Mr. Winkle from Birmingham Mr. Pickwick and Sam Weller were from home all day long only returning just in time for dinner and then wearing an air of mystery and importance quite foreign to their natures it was evident that very grave and eventful proceedings were on foot but various surmises were afloat in their precise character some among whom was Mr. Tubman were disposed to think that Mr. Pickwick contemplated a matrimonial alliance but this idea the ladies most strenuously repudiated others rather inclined to the belief that he had projected some distant tour and was at present occupied in effecting the preliminary arrangements but this again was stoutly denied by Sam himself who had unequivocally stated and examined by Mary that no new journeys were to be undertaken at length when the brains of the whole party had been wracked for six long days by unavailing speculation it was unanimously resolved that Mr. Pickwick should be called upon to explain his conduct and to state distinctly why he had thus absented himself from the society of his admiring friends with this view Mr. Whartle invited the full circle of Delphi and the decanters having been thrice sent round open to the business we are all anxious to know said the old gentleman what we have done to offend you and to induce you to desert us and devote yourself to these solitary walks are you said Mr. Pickwick it is singular enough that I had intended to volunteer a full explanation this very day so if you will give me another glass of wine I will satisfy your curiosity the decanters passed from hand to hand with unwanted bristness and Mr. Pickwick looking round on the faces of his friends with a cheerful smile proceeded all the changes that have taken place among us said Mr. Pickwick I mean the marriage that has taken place and the marriage that will take place with the changes they involve rendered it necessary for me to think soberly and at once upon my future plans I determined on retiring to some quiet pretty neighborhood in the vicinity of London I saw a house which exactly suited my fancy I have taken it and furnished it it is fully prepared for my reception and I intend entering upon it at once trusting that I may yet live to spend many quiet years in peaceful retirement by the society of my friends and followed in death by their affectionate remembrance here Mr. Pickwick paused and a low murmur ran round the table the house I have taken said Mr. Pickwick is at Dulwich it has a large garden and is situated in one of the most pleasant spots near London it has been fitted up with every attention to substantial comfort perhaps to a little elegance besides a judge for yourselves Sam accompanies me there I have engaged on Perker's representation a housekeeper a very old one and such other servants as she thinks I shall require I propose to consecrate this little retreat by having a ceremony in which I take a great interest performed there I wish if my friend Wardle entertains no objection that his daughter should be married from my new house on the day I take of it the happiness of young people said Mr. Pickwick a little moved has ever been the chief pleasure of my life it will warm my heart to witness the happiness of those friends who are dearest to me beneath my own roof Mr. Pickwick paused again Emily and Arabella sobbed audibly I have communicated both personally and by letter with the club Mr. Pickwick gave me the intention during our long absence it has suffered much from internal dissensions and the withdrawal of my name coupled with this and other circumstances has occasioned its dissolution the Pickwick club exists no longer I shall never regret said Mr. Pickwick in a low voice I shall never regret having devoted the greater part of two years to mixing with different varieties and shades of human character frivolous as my pursuit of novelty may have appeared to many nearly the whole of my previous life having been devoted to business and the pursuit of wealth numerous scenes of which I had no previous conception have dawned upon me I hope to the enlargement of my mind and the improvement of my understanding if I have done but little good I trust I have done less harm and that none of my adventures in a source of amusing and pleasant recollection to me in the decline of life God bless you all with these words Mr. Pickwick filled and drained a bumper with a trembling hand and his eyes moistened as his friends rose with one accord and pledged him from their hearts there were few preparatory arrangements to be made for the marriage of Mr. Snodgrass as he had neither father nor mother and had been in his minority board of Mr. Pickwick's that gentleman was perfectly well acquainted with his possessions and prospects his account of both was quite satisfactory to Wardle as almost any other account would have been for the good old gentleman was overflowing with hilarity and kindness and a handsome portion having been bestowed upon Emily the marriage was fixed to take place on the fourth day from that time the suddenness of which preparations reduced three dressmakers and a tailor to the extreme verge of insanity getting posed horses to the carriage old Wardle started off next day to bring his mother back to town communicating his intelligence to the old lady with characteristic impetuosity she instantly fainted away but being promptly revived ordered the brocaded silk gown to be packed up forthwith and proceeded to relate some circumstances of a similar nature to the eldest daughter of Lady Tullum Glower deceased which occupied three hours in the recital and were not half finished at last Mrs. Trundle had to be informed of all the mighty preparations that were making in London and being in a delicate state of health was informed thereof through Mr. Trundle lest the news should be too much for her but it was not too much for her in as much as she at once wrote off to Muggleton to order a new cap and gown and moreover avowed her determination of being present at the ceremony here upon Mr. Trundle called in the doctor and the doctor said Mrs. Trundle ought to know best how she felt herself to which Mrs. Trundle replied that she felt herself quite equal to it and that she had made up her mind to go upon which the doctor who was a wise and discreet doctor and knew what was good for himself as well as for other people at home she might hurt herself more by fretting than by going so perhaps she had better go and she did go the doctor with great attention sending in half a dozen of medicine to be drunk upon the road in addition to these points of distraction Wardle was entrusted with two small letters to two small young ladies who were to act as bridesmaids upon the receipt of which the two young ladies were driven to despair and was ready for so important an occasion and no time to make them in a circumstance which appeared to afford the two worthy papa's of the two small young ladies rather a feeling of satisfaction than otherwise however old frocks were trimmed and new bonnets made and the young ladies looked as well as could possibly have been expected of them and as they cried at the subsequent ceremony in the proper places and trembled at the right times to the admiration of all beholders how the two poor relations ever reached London whether they walked or got behind coaches or procured lifts and wagons or carried each other by turns is uncertain but there they were before Wardle and the very first people that knocked at the door of Mr. Pickwick's house on the bridal morning were the two poor relations all smiles and shirt collar they were welcomed heartily though for riches or poverty had no influence on Mr. Pickwick the new servants were all alacrity and readiness Sam was in a most unrivaled state of high spirits and excitement Mary was glowing with beauty and smart ribbons the bridegroom who had been staying at the house for two or three days previous sallied forth gallantly to Dulwich church to meet the bride attended by Mr. Pickwick Ben Allen, Bob Sawyer Sam Weller outside having at his buttonhole a white favor the gift of his lady love and clad in a new and gorgeous suit of livery invented for the occasion they were met by the Wardles and the Winkles and the bride and bridesmaids and the trundles and the ceremony having been performed the coaches rattled back to Mr. Pickwick's to breakfast where little Mr. Perker already awaited them here all the light clouds of the more solemn part of the proceedings passed away every face shown forth joyously and nothing was to be heard but congratulations and commendations everything was so beautiful the lawn in front the garden behind the miniature conservatory the dining room, the drawing room the bedrooms, the smoking room and above all the study with its pictures and easy chairs and odd cabinets and queer tables out of number with a large cheerful window opening upon a pleasant lawn and commanding a pretty landscape dotted here and there with little houses almost hidden by the trees and then the curtains and the carpets and the chairs and the sofas everything was so beautiful so compact, so neat and in such exquisite taste said everybody that there really was no deciding what to admire most of all this stood Mr. Pickwick his countenance lighted up with smiles which the heart of no man, woman or child could resist himself the happiest of the group shaking hands over and over again with the same people and when his own hands were not so employed rubbing them with pleasure turning round in a different direction at every fresh expression of gratification or curiosity and inspiring everybody with his looks of gladness and delight breakfast is announced Mr. Pickwick leads the old lady who has been very eloquent on the subject of Lady Tollam-Glower to the top of a long table Wardle takes the bottom the friends arrange themselves on either side Sam takes his station behind his master's chair the laughter and talking cease Mr. Pickwick having said grace pauses for an instant and looks round him as he does so the cheers roll down his cheeks in the fullness of his joy let us leave our old friend in one of those moments of unmixed happiness of which if we seek them there are ever some to cheer our transitory existence here there are dark shadows on the earth but its lights are stronger in the contrast some men like bats or owls have better eyes for the darkness than for the light such optical powers are better pleased to take our last parting look at the visionary companions of many solitary hours when the brief sunshine of the world is blazing full upon them it is the fate of most men who mingle with the world and attain even the prime of life to make many real friends and lose them in the course of nature it is the fate of all authors or chroniclers to create imaginary friends of art nor is this the full extent of their misfortunes for they are required to furnish an account of them besides in compliance with this custom unquestionably a bad one we subjoin a few biographical words in relation to the party at Mr. Pickwick's assembled Mr. and Mrs. Winkle being fully received into favor by the old gentleman were shortly afterwards installed in a newly built house about half a mile from Mr. Pickwick's Mr. Winkle being engaged in the city as agent or town correspondent of his father exchanged his old costume for the ordinary dress of Englishman and presented all the external appearance of a civilized Christian ever afterwards Mr. and Mrs. Snodgrass settled at Dingley Dell where they purchased and cultivated a small farm more for occupation than profit occasionally abstracted in melancholy is to this day reputed a great poet among his friends and acquaintance although we do not find that he has ever written anything to encourage the belief there are many celebrated characters literary, philosophical and otherwise who hold a high reputation on a similar tenure Mr. Tubman when his friends married and Mr. Pickwick settled took lodgings at Richmond and his parents resided he walks constantly on the terrace during the summer months with a youthful and jaunty air which has rendered him the admiration of the numerous elderly ladies of single condition who reside in the vicinity he has never proposed again Mr. Bob Sawyer having previously passed through the Gazette passed over to Bengal accompanied by Mr. Benjamin Allen having received surgical appointments from the East India Company they each had the yellow fever 14 times and then resolved to try a little abstinence since which period they have been doing well Mrs. Bardell let lodgings to many conversable single gentlemen with great profit but never brought any more actions for breach of promise of marriage her attorneys Messers Dodson and Fogg continue in business from which they realize a large income and in which they are universally considered among the sharpest of the sharp Sam Weller kept his word and remained unmarried for two years the old housekeeper dying at the end of that time Mr. Pickwick promoted Mary to the situation on condition of her marrying Mr. Weller at once which she did without a murmur from the circumstance of two sturdy little boys having been repeatedly seen at the gate of that garden there is reason to suppose that Sam has some family the elder Mr. Weller drove a coach for 12 months but being afflicted with the gout was compelled to retire the contents of the pocket book had been so well invested for him however by Mr. Pickwick that he had a handsome independence to retire on upon which he still lives at an excellent public house near Shooters Hill where he is quite reverenced as an oracle affecting very much of his intimacy with Mr. Pickwick and retaining a most unconquerable aversion to widows Mr. Pickwick himself continued to reside in his new house employing his leisure hours in arranging the memoranda which he afterwards presented to the secretary of the once famous club or in hearing Sam Weller read aloud with such remarks as suggested themselves to his mind which never failed to afford Mr. Pickwick great amusement he was much troubled at first by the numerous applications made to him by Mr. Snodgrass Mr. Winkle and Mr. Trundle to act as godfather to their offspring but he has become used to it now and officiates as a matter of course he never had occasion to regret his bounty to Mr. Jingle for both that person and Job Trotter became in time worthy members of society although they have always really objected to return to the scenes of their old haunts and temptations Mr. Pickwick is somewhat infirm now but he retains all his former juvenility of spirit and may still be frequently seen contemplating the pictures in the Dulwich gallery or enjoying a walk about the pleasant neighborhood on a fine day he is known by all the poor people about who never failed to take their hats off as he passes with great respect the children idolize him and so indeed does the whole neighborhood every year he repairs to a large family merry-making at Mr. Wardles on this as on all other occasions he is invariably attended by the faithful Sam between whom and his master there exists a steady and reciprocal attachment which nothing but death will terminate End of Chapter 57 End of the Pickwick Papers by Charles Dickens


hey howdy hey friends we are at toy storyline and we are here to hunt down hidden niggies if we can't find any yeah we have to find them first let's go find as some cast members because I don't know of any I only know one oh so we're gonna see what we could do but try to spot them on ourselves what is lunchbox it's in the shape of the grapes or the raspberries or blackberries or something that's actually in the queue for slinky dog dash so we're gonna go see if we can spot that one and we ran into a fellow vlogger and on this little coloring board over here you can definitely spot something in the cloud thanks slinky for being so great slinky dog because it's a 85-minute wait which isn't that bad it's actually really good but we don't have a fast fast either so I actually went up to the exit and I was looking for it and a cast member was just like hey let me take you over there and let me show you isn't that so nice this is becoming very challenging in fact yep took her sunglasses off yes I know we have to so far I'm hoping to get at least like three or four they have to be here right I'm not like 55 oh my lord we're gonna be here all day I mean I'll tell you does this count while we were searching for hidden Mickey's we did find what I found a secret stash of tater tots a secret stash of tater tots well this might not be a hidden Mickey however it is a Pixar Easter egg yeah it is pretty awesome and imaginary told me about this so I'm excited to show you guys if you are a Toy Story or Pixar fan you might know what a 113 stands for well not stands for but you see it a lot inside Pixar films including the license plate on the back of the pizza plan a truck and yeah monsters in Kaz it it's almost in every single Pixar this a 113 slinky dog just went down because there is apparently lightning in the area and you can see it's clear clouds over there but a little bit darker on this side it's not bad there's so many round things in here straining our special eyes my brand they have my brand well something caught my eye now for it to be a hidden Mickey the circles have to connect and I'm pretty sure that's a hidden Mickey we also have fast passes for toy story midway mania so we can't pass that up you gotta get that done you forgot your glasses no not your sunglasses your toy story glasses well I'm aware that there are two maybe yep one definitely possibly to have Mickey's in say toy story midway mania what I found the shirt oh it's a very nice shirt too early access thank you and look at that hidden Mickey right there right on toy story midway mania slinky dog bulls I am potato head form a massive hidden Mickey Nathan yes looking for hidden Mickey any I don't believe we have any Mickey in the backyard yet and you didn't put any back here no unfortunately you know always the one who probably put it in here well we're leaving toy story land feel pretty defeated here we only found what we spotted three hidden Mickey's one of them was old it's been there since forever yeah and toy story midway mania but the one on slinky dog dash above dr. evil pork chop and then the fruit in Woody's lunchbacks those are newer ones I wish we found more we don't even know if there is more but nobody knows anything we've asked cast members we've asked coordinators we scavenge the whole entire land with our eyes nothing nothing nobody knows if you guys know of any or find any please let us know leave us a comment so that we can maybe go scout it out yeah we're gonna we're gonna head on out of this land in a couple seconds yeah well before we actually leave the park you want to stop in the tinseltown trinket to check out some toy story land merchandise we haven't been in here yet no yeah first time in here so let's see yes yeah huh oh there's parachute Woody's and parachute buzzes look at that $7.99 you throw them up in the air and they come down I don't know 2095 for the flying buzz light years we put this in the b-roll didn't we yeah they're pretty nifty actually have a slinky dog look at that 24.99 that's the same price as a pair of ears Veronica's been eyeing up this cup here 14.99 how about this t-shirt though I don't like it not a big fan it has Hollywood studios on the sleeve they put MGM studios on the sleeve I'd be impressed look at this cool backpack toy story land I played there oh you put like that well they also have like a little tiny other backpack too they also have an ornament oh this is a pass holder exclusive right here yeah they keep all the good stuff behind the register though well I think that'll do it for us you seem so down because you can find any past I hit a Mickey's what we did find you so love the life you live like your first time watching our channel subscribe you may like it even though we can't find in Mickey's see you next time and we went to the PO box in this little cool looking doodad is a cooler tote from Deanna and Sebastian to keep our Bud lights in they left us a little note and then we got this and it was in happy birthday wrapping paper Simba tattoos these are to plant a bunch of seas packets for me to start a little garden outside if you guys know from the live streams I like plants and a Disney dollar I do not actually have one of these so I'm really excited about this and then the side of my birthday present was a card it says you're like family to me except I actually like you it's from Joanne she got the flower seeds for me and it's just awesome I love Joanne she's so awesome to us she always writes to us and Deanna this is so cool thank you so much I cannot wait to carry our baked beans and Bud light in this