just wasn't turned on I just use it like this thanks everyone for coming we're about to get started so today we're talking about migrating at scale and how not to fail so this is assuming that you are already familiar with migrations if you've never done a migration before then this is not necessarily the session for you we just don't be there will be some code later on and it's don't assume you've already written YAML files or you've written process plugins and so on so first critical introduction to ourselves I'm Stella Power I'm the managing director of Anartec this is a digital agency based out of Ireland but we're actually distributed all across Europe and yeah I'm a recovering backend developer too so while I am managing director every so often I like to get my hands dirty in code and what I like to do are migrations and I'll pass over to Eric. Hi I'm Eric Erskine I've been working with Drupal for about 12 years I've been working with Anartec for about a year and a half I primarily do backend development far too many migrations there's never too many migrations so Anartec specializes in well Drupal that's why we're here and a lot of what we do are integrations and migrations and a lot recently of migrating from legacy Drupal 7 sites given that end of life for Drupal 7 is next year trivia question hint that's not surprising so recently we were tasked by University of Limerick to take their existing Drupal 7 infrastructure and migrated to Drupal 9 so they have over 200 sites and we decided for phase one that we would take 50 of those so you know governance of the of the so there is a number of sites in a multi-site platform and then there was a lots of sites that are sort of standalone so governance is proving tricky every site had a different login while some of them were similar some of them were not so a course on one site course node for example was a bit different on other sites the person content type of one site was different from another site so they had while some of them had started from the same base they had diverged over time maintenance was a bit of a nightmare as well security updates different modules some had extra plugins some of the modules weren't you know it's supported anymore so the plan was or the decision was taken to upgraded to Drupal 9 so as I mentioned for phase one which we've just completed we took a subset of 50 sites now these were the 50 sites that were on a multi-site installation and so that we were migrating them onto one single unified Drupal 9 platform this would allow the University of Limerick to centrally manage all the logins all the permission and have one platform to maintain for this we decided to use the group module hands up anyone who's ever used the group module who is familiar with it so every department used to have their own website or every school in the University had their own website they now became a group with their own editors in their own content so if you're an editor for a particular school's website you locked in and then you could edit the content just within the group that you're assigned to and we also use layout builder so the legacy platform had paragraphs and we switched that to layout builder so oh sorry I know I am right so of the 50 sites there was over 60,000 nodes and over 70 content types and that's not 70 unique content types that's just 70 content types with the same machine name and then there was over 95 paragraph types and over 60 vocabularies at the end of the day there's 30 over 37,000 or no over yeah over 37,000 individual migrations that we ran so we'll talk about so this lesson or this session is about the lessons learned in that and how we the tips and tricks that we learned and picked up along the way and some things that made our lives much much easier so we go through that in this session one thing I want to cover though is why we decided to rebuild versus upgrade or why you might decide in your project whether you're going to upgrade your site or just rebuild it so Drupal 7 was released over 11 years ago some of you who were around then might remember the parties the Drupal 7 release party so there there's a map and you should see all the parties all around the world but you know it's 11 years old and when it you know reaches end of life as currently scheduled for next year it's 12 years old and technology moves on and sites like certainly if you have an early days Drupal 7 site it's grown and has grown organically and things have changed you might move from field collections to paragraphs so you might have both in your site you're going to have made decisions that suited your organization back then but your organization has moved on and your website has moved on and it or your website hasn't moved on and you need to refactor and rebuild so it's simply no longer fit for purpose and that's really why we recommend that you rebuild it's the perfect opportunity to do a redesign and set up the site for the future rather than carrying all your legacy you know legacy decisions and latency infrastructure with you and then of course there's the issue of abandoned modules where there is no upgrade path or where there's simply just no clear upgrade path maybe if to use a different module but there's no way to different aid to be so preparing for migrations get to know your data analyze analyze analyze analyze so there's no too much there's no such thing as too much planning look at all your legacy data structures every single field and every single entity whether it's nodes paragraphs field collections recoveries beans anyone anyone rubber beans so you you need to get through you need to understand your data you need to understand what you're going to keep what you're not going to keep so maybe there's some content that is completely out of date and you don't want to migrate so you know you need to know that or maybe there's some you do but you want to restructure it maybe you want to move from field collections to paragraphs maybe want to move from paragraphs to layout builder like we did so you start by mapping your data structures you create a spreadsheet is what we did for every single entity and you map it to where that data is going to live in the new site so this process can take a while it can take weeks it can take months depending on the size of your migration and how many sites you're doing and then you define your control data so this is the data that you know covers the different aspects of the sites the different combinations of fields and you define that as your control data and that's what you're testing with constantly you run the migration it doesn't work you need to tweet it you roll it back you run it again and when the test pass with your control data then you move on to you know doing it on the full thing so this is an example of one of the many migration mapping strip as red sheets be created so and this was all excuse me this was all done by hand for all 50 sites for all 95 paragraphs by all 70 content types on the left hand side on the blue side that's the legacy data structure so you can see we've got the field label the field name the type of thing it is and then like if it's a term reference or paragraph sensitive reference field what it references what can that field hold then you've got whether it's a required field you know how many values can it take is this a single value field multi value any notes you might want to keep now for this particular project we also had a site column as to some of the fields the ones in yellow were only on some of the sites so you can see that the news space was only on the main site in the core platform whereas the private news that originally on the careers fairs section website and then some of them like the additional content field they're on all of the sites but the configuration of it was different and then you say what you're going to migrate what you're not whether it's done and then you say whether where it's going to in the new infrastructure so this was all created by hand and laborious so Eric came up with a pretty nifty module for the next migration thank you Stella so we like working with these spreadsheets because they're useful for collaborating you know front-end developers and back-end developers collaborate on them say where fields are going what content types are we going to keep what content types are we going to merge to all sorts of things with it and we can add notes to them Stella likes to color things in so when the next triple seven migration came up but we looked at ways at could we automate the process of creating this spreadsheet and we have this little demo of a tool that we wrote command line tool and it will create a Google sheet for a single entity type let's choose a paragraphs now we've got this overview of all of the paragraph types in a source site this first tab gives us a list of them all and then we've got individual tabs for every bundle let's have a look at this first paragraph type that's to CTA section on this tab we can see all the fields in this paragraph type you see there's some nested paragraphs in there and image and some text and over here we've got this this figure which is a usage we count the number of times that field is used and if we click on that we get taken to this report so it's everywhere it's being used and what context we've actually linked this up to the clients legacy site we can go there if we want to see it you see that page directly and we can also see some detail about the relevant entity let's see what's in this paragraph 1036 and now we get a nice little view of everything that says comprehensive view of everything that in that entity I like to compare this one side-by-side with the existing site and kind of see what's what so do you have anything to add on that that module it's pretty nifty it would have saved me hours of work if I had it on the University of Limerick site so we are contributing it back there's a rough version of it up in the sandbox so we'd be cleaning that up a bit making it more suitable for other sites and yeah that we contribute it back to community the URL is there in the screen thanks I want to pick up on the point we made about 3,737,000 migrations that's a big number and we didn't write them all one by one as you probably gathered I just want to imagine migration from a Drupal 7 site and we would have an individual migration maybe for different kinds of entities maybe some taxonomy terms and nodes users we write each of those as a YAML file and each of them gets turned into a plugin it is quite a typical way to go about this kind of migration but University of Limerick had one Drupal 7 site per faculty so this is this is one faculty and they had about 50 faculties so you can see how this the number of these migrations just mushrooms if I had if I had 20 things long here 50 sites immediately I'm up to a thousand we can visualize this on this sort of two-dimensional graph we've got these definitions along here on the X axis and we got the kind of variations of them along the Y axis we've also got there's a few discrepancies few differences between these sites as they they started off from one Drupal 7 site it was copied to another one few changes made copied again so they're slowly diverged over time all we need is a way to take a base configuration for any one of these things and multiply it to get this number of migrations individual ones that we can run one by one and end up with all of the plugins that we need it turns out that Drupal has just a thing for that and called a plug-in derivatives anyone here ever heard of the derivatives before one do okay about ten of you maybe yeah they used in them quite a few other cases not just migration and let's have a look at how these things work so we're gonna take a typical YAML file the definition of a migration then we add in an extra line to say that this definition uses a deriver now what happens is that that YAML file becomes the definition of a base plug-in and it's up to the deriver to take this base definition and return lots of copies and drive looks something like this but this get definitions function gets passed in the base plug-in definition which is the YAML we'll just be looking at and this instance it's returning three migrations it's creating one called arts one called science one called language and it's up to the driver to say okay I need to I need to copy the base plug-in definition and maybe I need to tweak it maybe I need to remove something add something the end result is that we end up with lots of migrations here are some faculties each this is pulling in articles for each different faculty and these are on the screen here we've got five different migrations each one is an individual migration just like a non-derivative one they've got individual queries they run on the database different amounts totals we can run we can import one of these we can import all of them we can roll them back they're just the same as non-derivative migrations and these plugins can be thought of as normal plugins they just have this slightly unusual name made up of the base identifier and then a colon and then the derivative name and other than that they're exactly the same so as I still I mentioned earlier we opted to change the way we decide was built from paragraphs and switched using layout builder not only that but we want down the route of giving a unique layout to every node where we were using paragraph layer so I want to talk a little bit about the the migration aspects of that quick bit about the layout builder terminology it's almost concept within a layout builder it's called the section and sections have one or more regions so on this page I've got two sections one is a single column was a three column every bit of content we can call a component replace the components into the sections all of that information lives in a field on the node called layout underscore builder underscore underscore layout I have no idea why is named like that with those underscores but it is a field just like any other we want to set that in the migration and I'm just about two aspects of the migration we need to get that filled in first step to talk about is we need to get inline blocks created so in triple nine inline blocks are called block content that's the name of the entity type and this migration is like any other migration we're taking paragraph entities and turning them into block content entities and when you use the process section to populate fields that we have then one field I want to draw your attention to is this thing called reusable we need to make that false if we made it true these every block we migrated would be available in a list to add to every page we don't want that these blocks that we're creating are intrinsically tied to one node so we're just going to make sure they're not reusable now we can run this and we do run it first but bear in mind that we haven't migrated any nodes at this point so this point all these blocks can be orphans so the next step is to match them up to nodes again the node migration it's like any other migration we can hone in on this layout build a layout field that we talked about earlier that's got to turn paragraphs intersections and components and the first thing we do is we locate and we load previously migrated block entity we wrote our own plug-in for this and it looks a bit like this it's going to use the migration lookup service first that's going to give us the block ID and then we load the entity second thing we want to do is make a component out of that block the component describes how a block will be placed into a section again we're a custom plug-in we take our block and we set certain parameters in this case the region that we're putting it in we're deciding whether to show the label we're deciding what the label is and what view mode we want to see on the block and we end up with this section component object at the end and lastly we create one or more sections again we've got a plug-in we choose a layout that we want and we put all our components into it and then what we want to end up with is a array of sections right at the end and all of that gets fed back into this magic layout build a layout field that we have that is how we went about migrating paragraphs to layout builder we've got a few tips and tricks we want to finish off with I'll hand over to Stella for the first few of those thanks Eric just to add that we will be writing a blog post with the code and we will be publishing the slides and the blog post will go into more detail than what we've covered here there are some things about like that was a very simple example with one column layout you know what if you've got the multiple columns how do you know what what goes where what if you've got a nested paragraph tree yeah so that be more covered in the blog post later on and we'll publish that so that's so some tips and treats first one I mentioned earlier that you are in you know you're running migrations they don't work you need to tweak them you roll back you do it again and again and then sometimes you're doing my database is completely messed up and I need to start afresh so nifty tip you know Josh site install will reinstall the configuration with a clean database but if you add the existing config parameter it will take all the configuration that's currently exported to your YAML files and import that for you so that's very handy when you're you just want to clean slates to start and test with again also if you are switching branches the configuration can change it's just a you're jumping between branches a lot for migrating different things or testing different things that can be helpful so another thing that we recommend is that you turn off caching for your configuration you will be editing your YAML files over and over and over again and you don't want to do it Josh cached here every time so that there will disable the back end cache for your configuration obviously don't deploy that production that's your local but it is very handy and it saves you a bit of headaches we also put the migrations in the migrations directory rather than config install so that's actually another tip I should have mentioned so you can just edit and tear trash or don't and it'll be there another one that I fell I fall foul love a few times is a search API so you're working away and you're migrating everything is fine you merge in the latest main branch into your migration branch so you have the latest configuration and somebody has configured search API or solar and now every time you run a migration it's also indexing the content you're migrating that slows things down considerably and when you're doing thousands of migrations you don't want that so turn off search indexing whether it's search API with solar or some other tool that you're using turn it off and I'm sure most of you who are familiar with migrations may be familiar with this already but there's the drush okay drush migrate import to to run your your migration but you know the ID list parameters very handy if you just want to test with one particular entity ID if it's a multilingual site you probably also have a colon language code after that and the migrate debug module or sorry not module parameter provided by is it migrate tools or migrate plus I forget which one is migrate tools I think that's very handy there's also the migrate debug pre parameter for when the entity doesn't get saved you can still debug and print out some outputs so that will display the legacy data structure and then also the new infrastructure that you're migrating into if it is if you use migrate debug and the migration did create the entity it will also give you the ID of the new entity created so you can then go check it out in your browser make sure it's correct all right next one it's a plan around your dependencies that you have it's a good idea to order your migrations in such a way that when you come across the reference like I do here that the thing you're referencing already exists so here I've got I've got some category terms and I've got some people and I've got some articles and articles have a taxonomy field that looks at topics and the article's also an author field it looks a person I would say makes sense to migrate the categories and the people first and then come back and do the articles I do you have to do that Drupal has this concept of migration stubs where if it comes across a reference pointing to something that doesn't doesn't exist it will create a kind of temporary placeholder node for it reserve the ID and then when you come to migrate the real thing it will populate that placeholder and fill it in for you which is which is kind neat can be a bit problematic because sometimes we find that we have reference fields that are pointing to nothing they've just I've got bad data in them and if we use stubs then we end up with a stub node sitting around so I would prefer that we don't do that and we just order things in the right way and we can't always do that sometimes we end up with a circular reference in this case each person has a one particular article that's about their biography and then you might have to use a stub and what I would say though is is one of these dependencies you can really think of as the main one you can still think of this in a kind of you can still think of the article being dependent on the person I'll do that one as without a stub and I do the biography with a stub links links are hard particularly links in freeform text like this and particularly if you're mixing you're mixing migrated content with new content and you end up with something like this good luck because that's really hard to deal with a kind of everything that we just said about organizing your dependencies goes out the window here because the link could be anywhere I think things that you can try here is first of all decide if your numeric ideas are actually a public interface these these things do have a habit of leaking out and appearing in various places if you if you can avoid that then then do one thing you can try is to write a process plug-in that actually looks up if there's an alias for note one two three and actually swap it out in the HTML there's another thing that we we were playing around with just last week which may work really well we're still kind of trying it out but that's to reserve a block of IDs for all your legacy content and any new content we we give them a much higher number now this will work if you're migrating from a source was about to become decommissioned it's not going to work if you have a continuous migration you can do today but I'm kind of curious to see how how well that works and if there are any issues with it it would solve a lot of a lot of problems the advantage of that approach is you don't need to use the DOM import and you know the other DOM process functions that migrate plus provides they're really handy for parsing HTML you don't need to worry about doing that you don't need to worry about link fields you don't need to worry about redirects so it can save a lot of pain and I think it will work fine you also wouldn't need to worry too much about dependencies and broken dependencies because you just you can keep the you keep the node ID is the same and if they're broken in the source the broken in the in the destination and that's okay and by not doing a migration look up to find out the alias you're making it faster this is one that really confused me for a while single values and multiple values and it really confused me because they both have these two plugins and both have a transform method that looks a bit like this and I thought what's going on here this is not doing anything like when would you use this turns out that if we do one or two things the process plug in either treats the data that is given as a set of values multiple values and passes it all of those to a process plug-in something like concatenating text would be a good idea if you had five pieces of text you want to concatenate them you pass all five to the process plug-in the other thing you can do is it called a plug-in once every single value so if something like formatting a date would would be one of these plugins operates on a single value you have five dates you call the transform method five times now do we normally kind of know which one of these to pick and how to treat the data but it can get it wrong so these these plugins they don't actually change the data anyway but what they do is they will operate as a hint to the next plug-in okay you should be treating this data that happens to be an array as a single value or you should be treating this data as multiple values and one more is the migrations work best when I have a clean and simple source data to work from if your data is hard it's a bit jumbled up consider having a separate step before you even start the migration to clean it up and I was working with a site that had data scattered across CSV files and I was having to cross-reference things across different CSV files I thought if only this was if only this was a database then I could write a nice query with a join and it'll be so much easier but I've got to hunt through these different CSV files so what I did was put them in a database I just CSVs tabular data it's nice to load it in I can also recommend using something like SQL light for this there's no extra infrastructure you have to worry about it's a single file it lives in the private files directory we dump our data into there and now we can do much easier ways of querying with it that's it anything dad I think the another thing about pre-processing and cleaning your data beforehand sorry I'll come up higher in stage is try to avoid the step on process plugins as they mess up your count so you'll see that you have so many unimported and then you'll run the thing and then you've a less number unimported and no fails and then you're going what happened the other ones so if you can write a source plugin to you know narrow down your data set in the first place then your counts will be sane yeah I can kind of reserve those skip those skip plugins for error conditions I think yeah okay yeah thank you for listening if you have any questions there's a we can give a microphone and you can run around if not you can run around but you can come up and take the microphone put up your hand there's also the app if you're more shy I want to ask the questions in the app we can answer them that way yes thank you you mentioned data cleanup is a good idea before the migration but we discovered in our organization that the content owners are mainly non-technical stuff is there any tool in Drupal maybe a module or anything else that could help non-technical people to do data cleanup I don't know of a tool in Drupal we do use streaming frog to create a list of all the pages on the site in a crawl and then we give it to the client or and or simplified export of it you can have a lot of data from that crawl and they can use the basis of their content audit to do that but we also have a content team who can work with the client to help them with that if they're struggling another question here not a question but another trick I had good success with installing the UUID module on Drupal 7 so I don't have to work with auto increments or it's then very easy you don't have to keep the IDs because they have the UUID and identify on the entity and then you can always use this one to resolve from your destination to the source data set because the UUID is essentially the same but the ID can change it then I think it gets easier yeah I haven't thought of that one yeah UUIDs are useful it's also worth noting that if you get there are ways to create a UUID from an arbitrary string in a predictable way so if you can you can get a key that you know it's gonna be the same you can always create a UUID from it one question here so close by did you do the migration in kind of one clean step or did you do you in incredible kind of steps where you kind of took it step by step in development or in the production we did it in one fell swoop so we obviously during development you sort of just do what you need we would have tied each like note article as articles so we could run all of those as one batch and we would have also tagged them as one site so we could do multiple grouping of things so we could roll out one site and not another as it happens we we readily ran it all from start to finish and then there was some manual cleanup of data after we did the migration because while the design wasn't changing for this particular project there were we were consolidating and narrowing down components so the 95 became 20 or 30 so we were saying well you have to make a decision as to which sort of layout which sort of design you're doing you have an insane number of paragraphs so there was some tweaking required to the content afterwards so we did that sort of we had a content freeze where they get new content if they wanted but we wouldn't update the migration and they were doing manual edits to that but yeah we did it all in one swoop there was a bug in the migrate tools module that meant when you ran everything in a batch that it would run the first migration nice and fine speedy you run the second one when they went to run the second one and run the first one again and then the second one they went to run the third one you run one two and three and so on which was taking hours like 12 plus hours that got fixed and fact went back and it's much faster when you do one at a time so yeah it took about three hours I think in the end to top the bottom hello I'm assuming that you had links inside content and in several projects the links were referring to the same page or external pages how do you manage to do that or to clean up the URLs in one only in the end projects since there are probably links that were referring to Asian stuff or what what was the strategy so the the new strategy that we would own actually wouldn't work for this site no it wasn't for the 50 sites so the we wrote process plug-in to clean up the text so that I mentioned earlier the DOM import DOM export process plugins by the migrate plus module so we had a and then you can do manipulation you can do on the DOM like string search and replace so we had process plugins that would parse the DOM find links and do a search and replace on them but every site that we're migrating were ul.ie slash the name the faculty or the stool so you would if it began with one of our 50 faculties it would we would manipulate it if it went to say ul.ie slash library which wasn't in scope for that migration we would leave it alone we're also a little bit fortunate with the the university is given that they had a site for each faculty they would have www.url.ie slash science so if we found that there were numeric things it would be you know www.url.ie slash science slash node 5 we migrating that into a single site it's just url.ie we could put in aliases with the old site prefix in so we have an alias now it says slash science slash node slash 5 points to node 250 or whatever it is got one more question I think so I'm assuming you don't have much custom code on these sites like there's no custom entities and I think like that I don't worry about but it was a bit hard to create in D7 but you could so I assume there will be some problems you would encounter if you had there was custom code a lot of it but there is no custom entities I don't think we I didn't migrate from any custom entities but if you did have a custom entity you just write a custom source plugin rather than relying on you know the D7 node or whatever is your base thanks I think that's time there okay if anyone has any further questions happy to talk afterwards but yeah thank you very much for coming


Hello everyone, I am Reshna Pathak from Valchand Institute of Technology, Sholapur. So today in this video session we are going to see all about functions. Now function is nothing but a class of a relation. What will be the learning outcome for this session? At the end of this session student will be able to explain functions in discrete mathematical structures. Now let us see a simple definition of a function. A function takes an element from a set and maps it to a unique element in another set. So this is nothing but your function. Suppose you have a set R and you have another set say Z and you want to map the element from this set to this set then it is possible with the help of your function. And the mapping is named with a particular symbol. So suppose now you have element 4.3 in set R and another element 4 in set Z. So I am mapping this 4.3 with element 4. So the elements present in R are called as domain and the elements present in set Z are called as po domain.  So this is all about a function. Now let us see a standard definition for function. Given any two sets say A and B a function named as F from or we say mapping corresponding so these are basically synonyms used for your functions. So given any sets A and B a function F from A to B that is F to B so this symbol is used for function A to B is an assignment of exactly one element that is F of X which belongs to B to each element where your X belongs to A that is capital A uppercase A it means your set. Now this is graphical representation of your function. You see we have a set B and we have a set A another set A so I am mapping element A to element B that is element from set B to the element to set A and this mapping is done with the F. So this is nothing but graphical representation of a function. Now we have some terminologies which we use in our function. Let us see in detail with an example.  So B belongs to capital B then so if this is the case then we say A is domain of F your capital B that is uppercase B is codomain of F your B is the image that means element is the image of A under F and A is a pre-image of B under F. So in general we see that B may have more than one pre-image. So these are nothing but the range where R is subset of B of F is read as B such that there exists A where your F of A equals to B. So these are nothing but your terminology is used in function. Now let us see more in detail about domain and codomain. So I have given a simple example where your A class grade function. See I have some elements over here and I have few elements where we have mapped these elements to these elements.  So we find your domain that means elements at this side are mapped with elements from this that is your codomain. We have one more example that is a string length function. Now here we have A a pre-image of 1. So basically we are doing nothing but the length we are calculating the string length. So for this it is 1 and the image of A is 1. So pre-image of 1 is A the image of A is 1. So this is nothing but your pre-image and image. Now I have a question for you. Suppose that F is a function mapping students in this class to the set of grades A, B, C, D and E. At this point you must say what is codomain and its range. So F's codomain what will be the codomain for your F and range. Now suppose the grade turns all A's and B's then what will be the range of F but what will be the codomain. So take a pause think on it. So the answer is you know F's codomain will be always A, B, C, D and E. Of course its range will be unknown. Now suppose the grades turn all A's and B's then the range of F is obviously your A, B and the codomain will be A, B, C, D and E. So this was all about your domain and codomain. Let us take one more simple example for this. You have say set X and you have another set Y. So the elements in X are nothing but your domain and the elements in Y are your codomain. So I will use a function F to map these elements. So I have 1, 2, 5, 7, P, Q, Jack, Q and in X I have 1, 5, P and Jack. And elements in Y are 2, 5, 7 and gel. Now my question is what will be the domain for F and what will be the range for your function F. So obviously all the elements present in your X element are domain. So the domain of F is always your X. So this is your domain. Now let us see range. We have 1, 5, P and Jack, 1, 5, P and Jack as domain that is nothing but your X coordinate. We have 2, 7, Q and Q. So these are your Y coordinate which will fall under your range of a function. So here I have 2, 7, Q repeated will be avoided. And here you have 2, 7 and Q. So these are nothing but your domain and ranges of function. One more thing, we have F of 1 equals to 2. So this was the case 1, 2. So this is read as function of 1 is nothing but your 2. Suppose if it is Jack, Q. So this will be read as F of Jack will be equal to Q. So this is all about your function. So this is all about your function. Now further we see types of function. In types of function we have basically 3 types. First is your surjective function that is also termed as onto function. Another will be your injective function which is nothing but your 1 to 1 function. And the third one is your bijective function which is combination of your surjective and injective function. So that is your onto and 1 to 1. Now basically in surjective function all the elements from your domain should be mapped with your co-domain in onto manner. It means it is not mandatory to map all the elements. You can leave some unmapped element into your co-domain. Now in injective function that is nothing but your 1 to 1 element. So the mapping will be done from 1 to 1. So all the elements from your domain will be mapped to your co-domain. And in case of your bijective function it is onto and 1 to 1. So the mapping should take place 1 to 1 and it should be onto. So these are nothing but your types of function. Now in this session we have studied all about functions. So here are some of the references which I have used during the content preparation. Thank you.


Well, hello and welcome to understand men now. I'm Jonathan assay of Jonathan assay comment I'm so excited to be doing this live stream for you today our topic the five phrases that make a man's heart melt And number four is the most important Really quickly if you're brand new to my YouTube channel hit please hit the subscribe button hit the bell So you can be notified of new videos And if anytime during this video the content resonates with you Please hit that like button so I can be seen in the YouTube out algorithms lastly My coaching is what I call heart-centered radical honesty. It's direct a little tough love and a lot of heart Occasionally I use expletives to enhance the sentence so if f-bombs are not your thing I highly recommend logging off right now And lastly these are just my perceptions and opinions based on most of my studying of studying relationships with over 20,000 hours of coaching and 33,000 hours of personal development work and I'm here to say is these are my perceptions and opinions. These aren't necessarily facts Okay, so with that said we're gonna talk about the five phrases that make a man's heart melt Now before we get into this folks I want to lean into the two different types of men who are actively in the Dating realm. I'm gonna repeat that the two different types of men who are active in the dating realm The first guy is the emotionally available guy the emotionally mature guy. Those are guys that are very Intentional about the dating process. Okay, they're very intentional. They're very virtuous They actually have a clue as to what they want in relationship So when they're putting themselves out there, they're very intentional and I know many of you like Jonathan I want that guy. I want that guy. I want that guy. I get it. I get it But here's the challenge 80% of the population men and women alike are emotionally immature Emotionally stunted or they're dealing with past traumas and past wounds So they're not really capable of being in a long-term relationship So you might be wondering why are they putting themselves out there? Well, the fact of the matter is is human beings want connection with other human beings We want we want physical connection mostly But also some sort of companionship connection and especially after the pandemic people have been desperate to connect with other people's people's people So I'm here to say is I recognize much of your frustration women of why it's so difficult To meet people because you're having to sift through all of those emotionally unavailable and emotionally stunted people Those who lack true emotional maturity now, I'm here to say ladies since my audience is women I'm going to tell you as a man out in the dating realm. It's equally the same for women There are equally emotionally unavailable women equally as amount of women who are emotionally stunted The only difference is women tend to be more expressive with their emotions and men tend to be more reserved in their emotions I'm not talking about emotions themselves. I'm talking about emotional maturity inter-personal Relationships and believe it or not women are just as bad in the process as men I'm here Pete that women are just as bad in the process of men So like I say typically there most guys are good guys. They're just bad daters Well, yes women are also good people and yet most of them are bad daters By the way, I want to say hi to my Instagram live who's following as well All right, so we're going to dive into today these five phrases that make a man's heart melt now I want to say this This is for the emotionally mature man the emotionally mature man because for the emotionally Unmatured man the emotionally stunted men it almost doesn't matter what you say because they're not capable of going deeper into a Relationship and repeat that they're not capable of going into the deeper into a deeper relationship This is one of the reasons why I created a coaching practice to help women vet for emotional maturity That's right You have to learn how to ask the right questions early on to determine if this guy's even a good candidate to be dating I call it pre qualifying your prospect and those folks who are in sales know exactly what I mean pre-qualify your prospect and if you need help learning how to pre qualify your prospect check out the link in the Description below to schedule a free discovery call with me to see if working with the coach is right for you If you're ready to hire a coach to learn how to ask better questions early on you should schedule a call with me because that's my area of expertise Okay, because folks Let's face it Most of you are throwing darts against the wall when it comes to men Most of you haven't learned how to actually get to know another human being and set sadly Men and women alike don't know how to get to know another human being beyond the surface beyond the surface In fact, if you're familiar with my relationship iceberg by the way for those on Instagram, that's my relationship iceberg But we're gonna go back to To my YouTube and on the top you can see the tip of the iceberg is chemistry All right, and above the water line is called attraction It's the first thing we see in the dating process is whether or not we're attracted to someone In fact, most dating advice is hyper focused on Attraction without really digging deeper below the surface of the iceberg below the surface of the water And as you can see here, it's shared values Blendable lifestyles and emotional maturity and as you start checking off these boxes The water line begins to drop the water line begins to drop and you have greater and greater Attraction for one another and yet most folks never get to that level of deep Attraction because they're they're with people who lack Emotional maturity or have weak emotional interpersonal skills to be in relationship or they don't share They don't their lifestyles are not blendable or they don't share the same values and I witnessed this with women Repeatedly over and over again Choosing the wrong man over and over again if you're ready to stop choosing the wrong man Do me a favor and raise your hand and say amen I am done choosing the wrong man because if you're ready to do that Then we're gonna then I want to help you like I said schedule a call with me All right, so we're gonna get into those five phrases that make a man's heart melt and guess what?  It's not that So I started to think I'm gonna put on my trusty glasses So I started to think about there's a you there's a me and then there's a collective we There's a you a me and a collective we and when two people get into that collective we that's the strongest place to be in relationship and When you're in that space men and women alike should be practicing Practicing something I learned from my ex-girlfriend dr. Sherry Myers She taught me something called the four a's the four a's and I want to talk about that right now because it leans into this conversation and the four a's are attention affection appreciation and acceptance let me repeat that attention affection appreciation and acceptance Okay, those are for that's like your multivitamin that your relationship needs every day for it to actually Progress much too. Let me reframe that your relationship Can progress without this, but if you want a juicy delicious relationship that's gonna go the distance I highly recommend each one of you practice these four a's attention affection appreciation and acceptance So we're gonna lean into these four before I give you the fifth bonus one for the five phrases We're gonna lean into these four and the types of questions You are the types of things you might say to a guy that actually Stimulates him that actually turns him on and let me just remind you this is for those emotionally available men who have Emotional maturity these are not this won't work on the emotionally stunted guy. I mean it might work a little bit But the reality isn't the emotionally stunted guy can't go the distance anyway So there's nothing you can do to hook her in to hook him in if he's not capable of going the distance But this is for those guys that you're ready to just take it to another level I want you to practice these five phrases. So the first one centers around attention So I like this particular phrase to share to a guy and it might be when you're having a discussion and you stop In the moment of the discussion and you say the following Repeat that you stop in the moment of the discussion. You say the following you say you have my undivided Attention you have my undivided attention in that moment. It's basically saying that you're present You're not thinking about the future. You're not thinking about the past. You're being present to what's happening in this moment So when you say this to an emotionally Mature man, he's gonna go wow I mean, that's a very powerful phrase when I'm ladies think about that for a second when a guy says it to you You have my undivided attention. Isn't that kind of sexy when you're about to share something well again This goes both ways men and women are actually more similar than you think and so you can actually practice what works on women The same with men, okay All right, so that's attention being present you have my undivided attention number two Now remember I said it's attention and affection now affection. I like I'm a physical touch By the way, I'm a words and physical touch guy I don't know if that's being a Leo or not But those are my two love languages and if you're not familiar with the five love languages I highly recommend you checking out the five love languages the five love languages and that's Words of affirmation or for us Leo's it's words of adoration and by the way, it's my birthday in two days So words of affirmation physical touch quality time access service and gifts So in this particular one the second phrase centers around physical touch so while stroking your his arm By the way, I I think this is a sexy thing. I what I've had women on first dates I was they just literally just started to touch my arm and I loved it I don't know if everybody likes that, but I know I loved it and I like the phrase. I like touching you I like touching you that might be you put your hand through his hair Touching his body, but actually adding the phrase. I really love touching you and feeling you That's a sexy phrase to make an emotionally healthy man's heart melt And as I said before those emotionally stunted men those emotionally unavailable men We'll probably get turned off by it because I'm sure some of you are saying well I've said things like that before and men have been turned off by it Well chances are because you were in a mouth with an emotionally unavailable or emotionally stunted man I like touching you and include some physical touch. We love physical touch All right number three oh Now any anything so it's attention affection Appreciation, do you know men oftentimes one of their biggest complaint or one of their Comments after going through a divorce is they felt a lack of feeling appreciated in the relationship I think most men would say that's probably number one to one and two is a lack of feeling appreciation So anytime you can use the word appreciation Gratitude or grateful again anytime you can use the word Appreciation and gratitude or grateful that's going to score way more points. So let me give you an example. I Had it's one thing to say like for example a man took you out on a date and you said thanks so much for treating for dinner Okay, that sounds good. Let's take it to another level I really appreciated that you took the time to plan a date and treat for a day And I just want you to know how grateful I am for that. I Really appreciate you took the time and I'm grateful These are two powerful words in the English language and because thank you is so Used habitually that it lacks any weight anymore. Let me repeat that. Thank you. Lacks any weight anymore wait So so I would like everyone to start practicing Using the word appreciation and gratitude. Can you do that for me? And if you can give me a thumbs up right now Okay, and number four. I like this one. This is the most powerful of all and that is men Listen, there's this old saying men Garrett men marry women hoping They don't change and women marry men hoping they do change ladies The one thing you can't do is ever change a guy Can a man grow beyond where he's at? Absolutely, but you can never change a guy So I like the following phrase as a very sexy phrase to share with a man and that is I accept you for who you are I accept you for who you are. I accept you for who you are. I accept you for who you are Do you know when a woman says that to a man? I accept you for who you are that probably the emotionally stunted guy Um, he's gonna run away because he doesn't accept himself for who he is But the emotionally mature man the emotionally available man when he hears you accept him for who he is That's like that's like fourth of july sky rockets going off And that is what I'd like you to start saying more often that you actually can accept the person you're with because that's going to make his heart melt And the fifth and final one the fifth and final one We're going to bring it back to sex. I'm going to bottom line is this It's simple.   Let's uh, do you want to fuck? It's funny I was watching the movie tad with mark wallberg and seth mcfarland and mila cunis is um mark wallberg's girlfriend And there's a scene where they're getting ready to for work and she becomes a little amorous with them And she goes hey, I've got an I've got 20 minutes before I have to go to work And she's being amorous and then he turns to her and says I only need one Ha ha ha that's a little cheesy, but the point is folks. Let's face it. We men Like sex. So if you initiate sex by saying let's fuck, that's a great way to make a man's heart melt All right, really quickly.  So those are the five phrases that make a man's heart melt Try them out.   I get it. I was there Many of you were wounded Both in your maybe in a marriage maybe in a past relationship I certainly am aware that you've been wounded in your childhood and such like that So that can make it very challenging to be in a relationship But here's the thing men women get attached very quickly So here's the bottom line because you don't get attached as a quick quickly as as women do I think you should be stepping up and start being more intentional Do you want a serious relationship or not? Be upfront because if it's just a casual relationship you seek and I know many of you are then please be more Delivered about expressing your capability of being in relationship because what I'm about to share next Is for the women to ferret you men out So ladies, I'm going to give you something to help you Determine if this guy is ready for a capable of a serious relationship or not And I'd like you to use this next time and the following is You're speaking to a guy named Jonathan for example Jonathan I've wasted time with men who are not serious or they still hold a torch for someone else Which one are you? I've dated men who are not serious about a relationship or they've been holding a torch for someone else Which one is you? Now here's the thing Of a true gentle a guy who's not capable of being in a relationship We actually have a virtue button inside of us We have the capacity to be virtuous and if we think you're someone of value of virtue In other words, we don't see you as a sex object We actually will turn you down Even though we might be in it for the short run. Let me repeat that we'll turn you down What I mean by turn you down is they may not answer this question But they'll probably not follow up for a date and that's actually what you want to accomplish You want the wrong guys not to ask you out on a second or third date And you want the right guys to lean in Now if a guy gets defensive because of this question if someone gets defensive over this one What does it say about them that they get defensive? You don't want to be with someone who gets defensive over a question where you said I've wasted time Dating men who aren't serious or hold a torch for someone else and by the way Had this been phrased the following Men have wasted my time who are not serious or the holding a torch for someone else Let me differentiate between these two phraseologies ladies When you say men have wasted my time, that's victim consciousness That's a lack of emotional maturity when you lean in and say I've wasted my time With men who are not serious or who are holding a torch for someone else The a guy who's again a guy who sees you with virtue May not respond or may deflect it But these guys won't call you back and that's what you want You want the wrong guys not calling you for a second date? Because if you ask me this question, which I I would love this question I'd be candid my last serious relationship ended four years ago I haven't been serious with anyone since and I don't hold a torch for anyone else. Thank you so much That's a great question because now I'm gonna on a date. I'm gonna ask you the same question Are you ready for a serious relationship and do you hold a torch for someone else? I hope you like that.  There's plenty of low hanging fruit out there. I get it But you know what even with the low hanging fruit you can be more genuine than most of you are All right, by the way, I please forgive me to the ladies about the low hanging fruit But a lot of women actually are they do it. They actually don't value themselves enough. They give their power away to men And that's not healthy for you either. This is why I invite every one of you to read my book What the heck is self-love anyway?  There's a link in the description below I highly recommend getting my book so you can start Experiencing more love for yourself so you don't give your power away And you don't become a doormat or you don't become low hanging fruit All right, I think it's time to take questions So if you want to ask a question in the live stream right now This is only for those on faith on youtube on the live stream post the word question Then write your question thereafter in addition Please purchase a super sticker or a super chat in a super chat You can post a question all the monies that come from a super sticker and super chat go to Scholarship fund in the in honor of Connor my son Connor. There's a picture of Connor That's my son who passed away three years ago It's in his name and the scholarship fund is to defray the cost of personal development for those folks that want To actually do some inner work for themselves All right, let's jump in And yes, thank you for my birthday my margaret. My birthday is on sunday.   Thank you, Cindy for sharing that for everyone Um, I saw a question here bear with me Um bum bum bum again write the word question. Here we go. Sadie writes jonathan Question jonathan. Do you believe there are any fundamental differences between men and women? If yes, what are they? jonathan, do you believe there are any fundamental differences between men and women? Yes, are they so if you watched my life Hold on everybody for one second Okay, i'm coming back. Thank you for being patient with me If you watched my live stream the other day I did the 11 factors for determining a man's love commitment style the 11. So here's the thing Basically that there are differences and there's similarity between men and women so the basic differences center around our our Instinct from our cave mandays men tend to be more provider protectors and hunters women tend to be nurturers and gatherers Biology based we give off different pheromones and different chemicals men have more testosterone women have more estrogen And then socialization the way we were socialized is boys and girls and our traditional expectations Those are our differences Sadie where we are similar Is how fucked up we are in other words how fucked up our childhood was our love attachment styles Our social our upbringing how traumatic our upbringing was The age of a person their life experiences their culture or religion culture religion actually is a little bit Different between the way men and women are treated. So I would say culture and religion Probably makes up some differences there Your socioeconomic state in in life. Basically. Are you rich poor? Are you average? That's where people are very similar physical appearance Each meant there's no differences between men and women and physical appearance and what I mean to say is We are in charge of our bodies how we look and I mean we can't control our height and everything Um, but we can certainly control a lot of what we when I say control Influence a lot of the way we look and how we feel and how we dress our emotional intelligence Women and men a lot 97 percent of the human population is emotionally weak in interpersonal skills So that's true of men and women alike and then lastly Introspective work men and women alike equally do very little introspective work So there are some differences biology instinct and socialization But everything else to the extent that we're similar. We are we are exposed to similar Experiences that affect us that have nothing to do with gender So Sadie, I hope that helps answer your question. That's a great question. It really piggybacks on my previous live stream called the 11 Um factors determining for a man's love commitment style and I highly recommend you watching that great question Sadie Thank you so much All right say hi to everyone on instagram. Thank you All right, let's see what other questions we have are you liking this content so far? Is this resonating with you if it is please hit that like button and share this with friends Jody says Men don't wait long enough to heal from a breakup. They are on dating apps already looking for validation intention.  Yes men do that women do that This is by the way folks every time you point the finger at a gender Without looking at your own gender because you're only looking at through your lens. Let me tell you as a man I see the same thing from women Judy So yes, that is true for men and women folks We've got to stop this separation of the sexes and start bringing us Together and one a great way to do that is to read the book if the Buddha dated if the Buddha dated I highly recommend reading this book to understand Not the differences between the genders about how we should operate more from a heart-centered spiritual place And not from this egoic space of pointing the finger at the opposite sex because that really does no fucking good But I do appreciate your question. Judy. Thank you so much All right, let's keep going Sherry says happy birthday my fellow leo. Yes, it's in two days. Thank you so much all right Denise writes question should we try our five tips today on emotionally unavailable men? Yes, go for practice these skills ladies Practice on the emotionally available men So you get so good at it that you're prepared for the right guy when you meet an emotionally mature man Emotionally mature men are not driven by sex Emotionally mature men don't put you up on a pedestal Emotionally mature men are very demonstrative very effusive and very intentional and that is the man. I'd like to see you date It's hard to figure it out because when a man comes on strong It's usually driven by sex or put you up on a pedestal and not necessarily whether or not he thinks he's You're a right fit for them. That's why my coaching program schedule a call with me We'll help you figure that out All right, Teresa just gave me a 20 dollar super sticker. Thank you so much Teresa. I really appreciate that It's my birthday. Well, you guys buy some super stickers and super chats Thank you so much. I really appreciate that Anya says I missed the tips. I just came in I'll share it again in a little bit Anya. Thank you so much Kelly says I don't move on fast, but some do I need time to get people out Get people out my energy so I won't hurt the next person Very good I'm a big believer of taking time to be introspective and work on your inner work So you can actually be ready for a juicy delicious relationship. Does everyone want a juicy delicious relationship? Raise your hand and say yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes All right, do we have any more questions post the word question? um Let's see. Oh, here we go. Sherry writes question A guy hangs around for a year For over a year. He was divorced and had one relationship after that. He keeps coming around not just for sex. Why?  No, that doesn't mean anything. He just happens to like you Do you like him? Why don't you ask him out on a date say? Hey, can I treat you to coffee? Can I buy you a drink sometime?   It needs to be burned now There's a couple good things in here.  I'm so emasculated I'm such a feminine mess because she asked me out That's the garbage Guys love when women take a little bit of initiative Why is bumble one of the number one dating apps where women take the initiative? So in my invitation for you sherry Put it out there What he got to lose and if he's not interested you get to move on from any Potentially unrequited love you might already be storing up inside of you Hmm boy, did I just get riled up right there?  Thank you so much All right, if we have any more questions Carol says lol penis falling off exactly Hey Let's see. I had a question come in here. Oh, that's not it. Um, what other question by the way, we got a bashful group here Okay wonder rights question How do I trust again from any man new to dating after 38 years? How do you trust a man? um Look at I look at trust like I look at the court system A person is innocent Until proven guilty So I like to give trust to everyone now what I'm what I mean to say give to trust I I like to watch I think Who is it? Dr. Pat Allen said instead of focusing on getting trust How about just looking for trustworthy acts? Do their actions match their words? Do they have victor consciousness instead of victim consciousness? Do they know how to fight fair meaning? Do they know how to listen to your point of view and accept your point of view as being true for you? Do they have empathy meaning? Can they lean into not just feeling your feelings but caring about your feelings and also caring about their own feelings? and then lastly Are they transparent because that's the sign of emotional maturity rather focusing on trust How about focusing on emotional maturity because the bottom line is this You know people can change their mind whenever they want They could we have people that have been got married made wedding vows And then three years later started to cheat people change their minds all the time But if you have a pre disposed pre disposition that somebody is guilty Before they've ever had a chance to testify Then that's on you and I got to tell you I've dated women with trust issues and this is what I do I X them out really quickly if a woman has trust issues. I say no no no no no I don't date women with trust issues I don't and I don't suggest you dating a man with trust issues. So if you have trust issues I highly suggest you working on that. You may want to do the Hoffman process the Hoffman process Do the Hoffman process. This is a great book to heal childhood wounds and traumas So you can be in a space where you can actually be more in your heart centered of loving instead of basically Judging someone before you ever met them. That's my invitation for you. Take it for what it's worth. I hope that helps Wanda great question. Thank you so much great question. All right trendsetters says question So if the guy corrects you when you say the f word and asks you to use softer words instead Let's make love Does it mean he's emotionally unavailable? Listen folks, you could I could have said let's make love, but I just said fuck because I like to draw f-bombs You know Some people are not everybody is uh is graphic as I am so I can accept that if someone is making a genuine request Like he did I actually respect him because what he's doing is making a request In fact in the work of of dr. John and Julie Gottman doctors John and Julie Gottman Their book is a great. There's a great book called eight dates eight dates What I love about their work is instead of making demands make requests So what he simply did was made a request Can we use softer language? And you have to accept that for yourself. Does that work for you? And if it works for you great, but that doesn't mean he's emotionally unavailable Someone I was really talking about in the earlier part of this uh live stream As if someone gets defensive or angry at any of the things I just suggested In these five phrases that make a man's heart melt Then chances are he's not capable of leaning in to deeper intimacy Into me. You see intimacy in to me see Into me see into me see intimacy intimacy folks 50% of divorces cite a lack of real genuine intimacy between the partners Really, that's it 50% of divorces cite a lack of genuine intimacy between them and their partners This is why I highly recommend reading the book Making love all the time by barba de angeles making love all the time by barba de angeles This is a great book to really lean into intimacy folks men ladies men aren't buying these books You are so start using these books And start sharing what you learned from these books. I know it's frustrating, but ladies Men are the physical leaders of a relationship and you are the emotional leaders of the relationship Everything I've learned today came from a woman most everything I've learned that I teach you came from women Not from men men aren't good at this stuff. You're the leaders of your relationship destiny not them All right I'm sherry. Thank you for the super sticker as well. I really appreciate that. All right. Let's see what other questions we have um Anne says a married man told me privately that his relationship with his wife is good, but boring What does he mean making love just like everyone is like chores? This is humiliating to me. Do you agree? First off anyone who's sharing private information about their marriage to someone Could be one of two. Well, first off he's breaking a confidence with his with his spouse. So Um, but sometimes men do that to test the waters because you women are so gullible I swear to god. Oh by the way, my mug says swear a little you'll feel better Um ladies you are so gullible When a married man starts to profess how unhappy is in a relationship It blows me away. How many of you get sucked in You got sucked in you get so sucked in by that. Wow a married man who's unhappy Maybe I can be the one who makes him happy So my guess is he was throwing a trial balloon Or he's betraying a confidence which isn't healthy either way. So that's my opinion on that one All right, and thank you for that Denise writes question How do you know when to walk away? He's a good man, but he's flat out says he's broken and needs space But still pulls you in folks. All right, so self-respect Self-respect means says when a man says he's broken and incapable of being in a relationship self-respect says Bye-bye And when you get pulled in it's because he just wants connection and sex Remember I said in the beginning of this livestream. There's the emotionally healthy man and the emotionally unhealthy man What you just described as the un emotionally unhealthy man who wants connection and sex and because all right So let me give you an analogy that will make help you with this one Denise My son call and that's a picture up there. Um, I'll never forget. He and I some years ago Um where he wanted to get a new video game that came out at Best Buy and it was coming out at midnight So We and he said dad, can you take he was 14? Can you take me to the store and we can wait in line? So we got there at like 5 p.m The 5 p.m. And when we got there we were like the 20th person in line Can I tell you by 11 59 before the doors open? It was a football field as wide as 20 feet of fathers and sons out there Or or any where there were adult kids as well And my kid my son got a video game halo or something like that And he played it and he played it and he played it and he played it and he played it and he played it and he played it and played it And then a new video game came out So he put the video game on the shelf and he played the new video game and he played it and played it played it But he got bored with the new video game and he pulled the old video game out and started to play that And then he got bored with that and put it away and played a new video game And then he got bored and he went back to the old video game Ladies, this is what men do They know you're on the shelf easily can just he can just easily pull you off the shelf because you're gullible. You're gullible. But Jonathan, I love him and I wanna make this work so I wanna do everything I can to make it so simple for him. Folks, when a man says he's broken and doesn't have space for a relationship, you should follow the movie Forrest Gump. Run, Forrest, run! Run, Forrest, run! Run, Forrest, run! You should be running away. Shouldn't be leaning into those kind of relationships. People reveal themselves, tend to reveal themselves quickly but you're allowing that person, self-respect. I'm spitting. Self-respect means saying no. One of the chapters in my book, one of the chapters in my book, learning to say no. Denise, no, no, no, no, no. Is this sinking in? Is this resonating? Everyone on Instagram too? I hope this helps. Thank you so much. And I wanna thank Sonia for the super sticker. Thank you so much, everybody. You're so generous on my birthday today. Thank you so much. If I'm making a difference in your life, purchase the super sticker and super chat. I'd be really grateful. Denise, thank you so much. I hope that helped. All right. There we go. Sonia's super sticker. Thank you so much. Denise says, oh no, Jonathan is gonna give it to me now. Exactly. Melissa says, Denise, that was a good question. I hope she liked the answer as much as well. Melissa, thank you so much. All right, let's see what we've got here. Post the word question or purchase the super sticker and super chat and post your question there. All right, we've got Natalie. Natalie writes question. How long is it reasonable to wait after a breakup? I feel I would need to go on a relationship faster. I may easily end up with any lusting man. So I think as a rule of thumb, if you were in a significant marriage, as an example, I would mentally give myself two years of unraveling. Here, hold on a second. Give yourself two years to unravel the tapestry of your old life and then maybe consider a new life maybe after reading some of the books I recommend. If you had a six month relationship, maybe give it two months, three months at the most. If you had a three year relationship, give it six months of some alone time. You know, what's most important is some really good quality alone time. Folks, my significant relationship ended four years ago. In fact, she was very sweet. She called me just now to wish me a happy birthday right before the live stream. And these last four years, I've really worked on healing my codependency. And if you're not familiar with codependency, I highly recommend reading the book, Codependent No More, Codependent No More. So I spent time healing my codependency and my need for someone to love me so I can feel good about myself. Now what happened in my case is my mother passed away. There's a picture of my mother and father. My mother was 88 years old when she passed away. And then sadly, six months later, my son passed away. Talk about breaking my heart open. It was through Connor's passing that I was able to lean into something I really hadn't done much in my life. And that was self love. And I began immersing myself in writing my second book called What the Heck Is Self Love Anyway? This is dedicated to all of those that seek love and it's in his name, his honor that I created this book. And during these last four years, I've actually learned to enjoy my own company. I never was that way. I never really did like my own company. And now I actually, I'm almost a little worried if I got too far on the pendulum of liking my company too much. It's gonna take a special woman to actually want me to, I don't wanna say give up, to lean into partnership. And I recognize that it's a frustrating dating process for many of you women, but it's frustrating for us men too. I gotta tell you, I've gone on dates with women that do very little to stimulate my mind or my heart. And most women I find are rather, they're not inquisitive. One of the sexiest things to me in a woman or a man is people who are curious, they're inquisitive, not just about you, but about life. Where's my phone? Hold on a second. Oh, there it is. Oh, I have a meme. I was trying to, my phone's right there. I'm recording this Instagram, but I have a meme.  I wanna talk about atoms, death, aliens, the lies you've told, your favorite sense. I wanna hear about your life. I don't wanna know what's up. That's the problem with most dating is most dating is so superficial. And this is why it's frustrating and men and women alike are bad at it. This is why I'm all about, one of the things I teach in my private coaching is called radical honesty.  I asked Friday, someone asked me, how do you ask a guy if he's emotionally available? And I said to you all, this is a great question to ask a guy. And I just did this recently with a date.   Now I said it laughingly with a little bit of Jess, but the point is, we're all rather riddled with wounds. And I think it's important to find out how fucked up a person is. Because if they're dealing, if they have unhealed wounds and traumas, they make bad candidates for dating.    That's all. Because sitting back in your feminine energy isn't going to attract an emotionally mature person, it only attracts those emotionally unhealthy people because human beings are, they're masculine and feminine. Masculine means doing, feminine means receiving. Healthy human beings are both. It's like the yin yang sign. It's a combination of both. It's not the man is masculine and the woman is feminine. It doesn't work that way. We are almost always in our masculine, almost every minute of the day we're in our masculine and we both human beings, men and women alike need to lean into our feminine, our capability of receiving. Feminine isn't a sense of, by the way, a lot of men who are considered feminine are considered weak, but that's being in your feminine energy isn't weak. Being in your feminine energy means you can receive love from another human being.  I went off on a rant here. What was the original question? A reasonable time to wait. Wow, I have this habit of, by the way, folks, I do have a confession to everyone right now. I'm dyslexic. I have a hard time reading and I mix up words all the time. So please forgive me for being human. I do occasionally completely transpose words. Part of it is I'm excited and I'm talking really fast, so that's part of it. But it's just who I am. And I hope you can accept me as who I am as one of those four things highly recommended if you wanna be in a healthy, juicy, delicious relationship. Folks, is this sinking in? Is this resonating with you? Please give me a thumbs up. Thank you so much. Or purchase a super sticker or super chat. Leaf just wrote, self-respect, learning to say no, exactly. All right, if you have a question, Linda says, ha ha, the emotionally unhealthy guy only wants to dance around sex talk and they're usually boring flirters, interesting. That may be true. Kelly says, I love curious people. I have two businesses. I would love to be asked questions. My ex got jealous instead. I don't wanna hear about celebrity drama all the time. Amen to that, Kelly. I don't wanna hear about celebrity drama. I don't know if you're watching Kevin Samuels these days. Boy, that's drama if I've ever seen it. All right, if you have a question, post the word question. Natalie says, my son is dyslexic. It took me a lot of effort to teach him reading. He is also gifted too. Natalie, I can relate to that. My son, Connor, struggled mightily with reading and he was dyslexic. And we did everything we could. We had tutors, we did eye exams, we did all kinds of things. It broke my heart to watch him struggle so much in school because he was so brilliant in so many ways in his life. And sadly he was never going to conform to the way our society is because our society is all about conforming people into a box and Connor was never going to be in a box. He beat to his own drummer.  And I understand why but it doesn't work for those people that beat to their own drummer or maybe have a disability. And sadly to live in our world, if you can't read it makes it very difficult and we did everything we could for him and he struggled mightily. So anyway, thank you for that. I really appreciate your post. Okay, Sylvia writes, it's your birthday, Jonathan. Have a glass of bubbly cheers to abundance and happy life. Thank you so much. I am going to go out and have a good time tonight. My buddies and I are going to Hollywood for dinner tonight. So if anyone is in Hollywood right now, meet up, I'll be at AOC later this evening with my mates. My best friends who I've known collectively, 35, 35, 35, 100 years of friendship between the four of us. All right, Danielle writes, I hope I didn't screw up your name. Question, should I continue to date a man who feels like a great friend to me and hope that I'll become more physically attracted to him? So I've interviewed thousands of women who are in happy relationship and nearly one third of them have said to me and I quote, I wasn't attracted to my guy on the first, second or third date. I wasn't attracted guy on my first, second or third date. But here's the thing, something changed. So I want to go back to my relationship iceberg, the relationship iceberg. And you remember chemistry is the first thing we see. It's about attraction. But what can happen in your case, Danielle, is you might find that if you share values, you have blendable lifestyles and you equally have emotional maturity, you might find yourself more and more attractive. The water line of attraction is going to begin to drop. By the way, this represents compatibility. This represents above the water line is compatibility. As you lower the water line, you might find yourself more attracted to him. Listen, unless he's missing teeth or have a beer gut the size of Texas, you know what, have sex. You might be surprised. Has anyone seen the movie, revenge of the nerds? Revenge of the nerds?   And all of a sudden she's like, oh my God, I want this guy. So maybe finding out if you're compatible with one another and having sex might shift the narrative. At least it's an invitation, I'm not suggesting. And by the way, practice safe sex, safe sex. If I'm gonna recommend sex, it's safe sex. But try that and see what happens. Great question, Danielle. Thank you so much. I appreciate that. Okay, I wanna thank Venetta for your super sticker. Thank you so much, that's very sweet of you. Folks, it's my birthday. Who's gonna get me a super sticker or a super chat? Thank you so much, I appreciate it. All right, there it is, Venetta. Hope I pronounced your name right. Oh, Venetta, thank you so much.  All right, Catherine, my sweetheart Catherine. I've always preferred to use the term making love versus fucking. Happy birthday, early birthday, Jonathan. Thank you so much. Actually, I do like that too, but you know what?  So each person to their own. Danielle says, you are amazing, thank you. I appreciate that. The Leo and me loves compliments, so thank you so much. Okay, Sonia writes, question. What do I do if my boyfriend cancels a plan and says he wants a self-care day instead? We aren't arguing, but now I feel awkward. Well, how would you feel if you asked for a self-care day? How would you want him to respond? In fact, I invite you, Sonia, right now to journal. If you asked for a self-care day, how would you like him to respond to you? That's your personal development work for today. Is for you to lean into how would you like that response to be if you asked for a self-care day? By the way, folks, I think one of the big problems with dating today is we're spending too much incessant time talking on the phone, talking on the phone, talking on the phone, talking on the phone, texting, talking, texting, talking, texting, talking. I mean, the truth is we need a break from one another. You know what? I actually, my ex-girlfriend and I, the one I talked about before, you know, we used to spend once or twice during the week and then weekends together. And when Monday rolled around, we didn't talk on the phone, we didn't text, we didn't do anything. We used to take a 48-hour break from each other. I think more people should take breaks instead of incessant communicating on their phones, you know, take breaks from each other. So my invitation in this particular case is let him have his self-care day.  It's not about you letting him. You should say, oh, let's try those five phrases. You know what? You have my undivided attention. I really appreciate you and I accept you for who you are. I think it's great that you want a self-care day. I really am grateful that you are taking a self-care day. Use one of those phrases I just mentioned. I accept you for who you are. Enjoy your self-care day. Oh, by the way, going back to the incessant text messaging, by the way, I have another comment. My ex-girlfriend I used to do something was called the following and I'd like to invite everybody to do this. So we used to, anytime we texted each other, if it was something kind of serious, we would actually write at the end of the text, N-R-R, N-R-R, no response required. And what I mean by something serious, let me reframe that. When we gave love to our partner, in other words, we would say something affectionate, not serious but affectionate. We would put N-R-R because that took the pressure of having to respond, N-R-R, no response required. No response required. That gave the person a break. So they didn't feel like they had to respond right away because a lot of times the reason why men ghost or disappear because it's too emotionally draining sometimes to respond all the time. So my invitation for every one of you is to practice this thing called N-R-R, no response required. Whenever you send some love, that takes the pressure off and when there's the pressure off, this is a great phrase to make a man's heart melt. Use N-R-R, no response required because it takes the pressure off and then he can respond when he wants to and not because he has to. Can you do that for me, please? Amen. All right, we're gonna be wrapping up in a few minutes. Oh, Natalie, thank you for the super sticker. I really appreciate it. If I answered one of your questions, I'd really appreciate super sticker, super chat. TigerTalk says women are too clingy. Yes, and men are assholes.  You know what? It goes both ways, folks. Okay. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Carol says, bye, Jonathan. Happy early birthday. I really appreciate that. All right. Sonia says, I accept you for who you are. I love it. Thank you. Hope you're talking to me. Kit Kat says, so I'm a plus size lady and a guy was surprised how sexually inhibited I was, in uninhibited I was because of my plus size. Hey, I know a lot of plus size women. I've had some in my own life that love to have sex. They are uninhibited. That's a fun check in my book. Any woman who's, I don't mean crossing boundaries, but anyone that's not rigid in their sexuality to me, that's just me speaking, is a fun woman to be with. And I hope you feel the same about a guy. All right. I wanna thank Georgia for the super sticker. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that. All right, Georgia, thank you. All right.  You know what? That, first off, I don't like that phraseology. If he can't handle a text from me. That's like that Marilyn Monroe. If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best. Look it. I don't like, look it. I understand how you feel, but handling a text is, it's not about handling a text. You might under, you need to recognize that a very loving text might feel like emotional weight to another human being. It might feel like weight that they have to respond. So rather than judging their behavior, just send love because you wanna send love. But if you're saying, well, he can't handle my love, that's, I don't find that very attractive because some people are incapable of it, doesn't make them bad people because it's like telling a cancer victim, well, you're not healthy, what's wrong with you? And I know you would never do that to a cancer person. So someone who's not capable doesn't make them a bad person, it just means that they're not capable. And rather than judging human beings, I wanna invite people to be more loving on human beings. So this is one of the reasons why I recommend everybody reading the book, The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. There's a link below to all my Jonathan recommends books, Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. Hey, folks, oh, Melissa, thank you so much for the super sticker, I really appreciate that. All right, we're gonna wrap up in a second with the following. I'm gonna allow you to ask any question of me for my birthday right now, I'm gonna look at the questions, I'm gonna take any personal questions, I'm gonna spend a few minutes answering that if you have a personal question of me and then we're gonna be wrapping up for the day because I'm going out to dinner, it's Friday night with my friends. So if you have a personal question, post it, I'm gonna do my best to answer honestly, so long as you haven't crossed a boundary. Okay, let's see if there's any questions. Oh, thanks Unconventional Lady for the birthday kiss on the cheek, I really appreciate that for those on Instagram, thanks so much. Oh my gosh, we have a lot of activity here. All right, Diana says, happy birthday Lito, where is your moon? And crying minds wanna know. So I've got five houses in Leo, five houses in Leo and I believe my moon is in Leo. I am, look at the world revolves around me.  I'm very aware of that aspect of my personality. It's probably because I didn't get a lot of attention as a child and I wanted to be seen, heard and understood. So I try a little bit harder, but I'd like to think I have a good balance, but yes, I occasionally do.  Debbie says, do you think you'll ever remarry? I hope so, I would love to get remarried. Thank you so much.  No, I'm just kidding, you didn't say that, but thank you so much. I was gonna ask his moon sign too, ha ha, what's your rising sign? I think, again, rising in moon is in Leo, I believe. Why did you get a divorce? Because I was emotionally, my question, why did I get a divorce? Because I was emotionally immature and wasn't a good partner to my wife. I really had no clue as to who I was and I wasn't a good partner. By the way, did you notice I didn't throw her under the bus?  And that's the way I'm gonna answer that question. Sherry says, I appreciate you, thank you. Question, this will be the last one of the day. What is the sexiest thing a woman's ever said to you? Wow, that's big. By the way, I did get that, but wow, that's big.  God, there's been so many sexy things. I think the sex, I'm gonna tell you the one that, okay, this one stands out in my mind and we're gonna wrap up with this. So a couple of years back, I went out with a woman who on our first date, we went to a dive bar. We went to a dive bar. It was like a great dive bar with great music. And I remember buying our first round of drinks and it was time to buy our second round. And it was about to give my credit card to the bartender. And she said, I've got it. I said, no, no, I got it. Being the gentleman, I've got it. And she goes, no, I've got it. I go, no, I got it. And we got into a little pissing match and she put her hand on my arm. She put her hand on my arm. She said, Jonathan, I really appreciate it. You treated for the last round. Would you allow me to demonstrate my appreciation by treating you this round? Because I think you're a great guy. That's stuck in my mind to this day. And actually, that action of hers made me see her as partnership material. Sadly, we dated for three months. We weren't a good fit for long-term. We both recognized that and we had a conscious uncoupling. And if you're not familiar with the work of conscious uncoupling, my friend, Catherine Woodward Thomas, wrote the book called, Conscious Uncoupling. We had a very, well, I'd like to think we had a conscious uncoupling. But what she said, Jonathan, I really appreciate it, you treated for that round. Will you allow me to show my appreciation by treating for you because I think you're worth it? I can't think of the one of the sexiest things another woman has said to me to basically say, you're worth it. I'm willing to put my money in my money where my mouth is to say you're worth it. That to me is sexy. Anyway, all right, all right. Linda says it's the little things, isn't it? Exactly, beautiful. All right, well, folks, I think this will be a great place to wrap up today. I wanna thank you all for allowing me to enter in your lives for a little bit right now. I hope you found value in this work. If you have purchased a Super Sticker Super Chat before I wrap up today, if I bring value to you, please share this video with friends. This is important content, I believe, that needs to be put out there. So I invite you to share this with friends. And if you think it's not your cup of tea, then I invite you to move on. But I hope this had value for you. Everyone, I wanna thank you so much for being on today. I wanna wish you a fabulous weekend. And I'm gonna wrap up this video as I always do. First off, giving myself a big, gigantic Jonathan Bear hug of self love. I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love if that's okay. I'm gonna ask you to turn to someone, a pet, a teddy bear or pillow, and give it or them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love. And let's face it, we could all use more love in our lives. Thanks a bunch, bye-bye now. Bye everyone, thank you for the birthday wishes from Julie, from Maja, Nora, Samantha, thank you. Rhonda, Colleen, thank you so much. Everybody thank you so much, big hugs, bye now.


I'm Alison Buckler. I'm a research fellow in international education. My work focus is on teachers and schools in remote parts of sub-Saharan Africa and the use of technology and open education resources to support learning in these contexts, and I've been nominated for the Early Career Research Award. I think I've been nominated for this award because I've been really busy since I finished my PhD. So while I've tried to be really strategic and tick off the kind of more traditional achievements expected of Early Career Researches, so I've written a book and I've had research council funding, I've also really tried to make space for more creative and exploratory projects, for example working with a media company to pilot participatory video research in Malawi with a group of teachers. And I've also tried to collaborate as much as I can in order to learn from and with the people who really inspire me in the field. And through this I've, even at this stage of my career, I've been able to contribute to research that's being used at some of the highest levels of education planning around the world. And so in summary I think I've been nominated for this award because what I've been trying to do since my PhD is really lay the foundations for a research career that's in step with the Open University's goal to creatively use research to influence policy and practice and to change lives. I think my research is important and topical in three ways. First we are experiencing a global learning crisis, 250 million children leave school each year without being able to read and write and there's a shortage of 69 million teachers worldwide. Understanding how teachers and education support professionals can be trained and supported to help children learn is a critical question that's only going to become more critical as populations and the demand for education grows. Second there are some really powerful debates at the moment that challenge established ideas about what constitutes evidence in education policy and planning and how evidence is used. And there's a growing focus on ideas around the democratisation of knowledge on genuinely collaborative research and cogeneration of knowledge and on research that is more ethical and impactful communities all the way up to policy. And I think these are the kind of approaches that my research builds on and it's a really exciting time to be able to contribute to and to shape these debates. Third I think the Open University is uniquely placed to become a world leader in international teacher education research. Our large scale teaching programmes around the world have had a significant influence on shifting Diffords thinking towards teachers and education and technology at scale and earlier this year they announced a renewed focus on funding in this area. So I don't just think that this is the right time to be researching these issues I think that by being based at the Open University I'm researching them in the right place at the right time.


Well, it was great to be at the University of Alabama. First off, we had a superb football team as we do today, so that was exciting. I was in the business school and very interested in what my opportunities would be there. And just being in campus life was wonderful. I enjoyed going to football games and basketball games, interaction in the Greek life there, even though I wasn't in a sorority. So I met my husband, James, at the University of Alabama. We were both students. And that really was the start of our life together. We actually married at the University of Alabama at Gorgas House. And I went on to graduate school at the University. So we spent a lot of our early days at the University of Alabama. It really is the roots and the basis for us for the long-term life that we've had together. I had an undergraduate business degree and then a master's in economics. And I had the good fortune of great faculty at the University of Alabama that pointed me to my first job. And that was as an economist with the Bureau of Labor Statistics in Washington, DC. In the course of that, I did some studies on the defense industry and other industries. And my next position that I interviewed for was at Lockheed in Marietta, Georgia, and took a position there as a senior industrial engineer. So my background in economics, my business degree, all matched well. Building on my business background and my great education from the University allowed me then to move up through the organization at Lockheed and now Lockheed Martin.