Hey, we're still on day three winding down Coming to the stage next on the 21 convention London 2011 the conference of The century the men's conference of the century that is a four-time speaker This is fourth time on stage here at the 21 convention and he was once voted best new instructor and you may recognize him from MTV's made Please welcome speaking on sexual escalation Jared psych Lawrence Thank you Now all of that sounds really great when he puts it all that way But I want to go back a few short years with you guys before I was psych and all that I Want to share with you guys a story That kind of symbolizes where I was back when I first started all this Back when I first started I was dating this girl Gabby Now how I got her I have no idea. It was literally like handed to me from God above right and Gabby was my everything She was the perfect girl. That was a girl who's gonna marry. That was a girl who's gonna grow old with I my whole heart was devoted to this one girl and Gabby didn't believe in premarital sex and I respected that For an entire year. We did not have sex. I was the nice guy. I was a gentleman About a year and a half of dating her We broke up and then in a few short months. I remember she started dating this Fucking arrogant Army guy eight years older than her and within a month. She lost it to him. I was devastated My heart I don't wish this on anyone here in this room.  How could she do that to me, right? I saw maybe it's just a fluke Well a year later I Started there's a prom going on a prom is basically a big dance that we all have in high school And America it's a big deal because this is it. This is a night where we could lose our virginity If we ever lost it yet tonight tonight and for me, this was it This was my big moment because I was the last of my friends who have lost his virginity already. I Was actually lying about it to all my friends. I was saying I lost it to Gabby because I was too ashamed of what actually happened so at prom night I find my girl I Last second I found one and I believe looking back the only reason I was able to even get that girl was because she never got to experience a prom night So the whole reason she was even there was just for the experience nothing to do with me and At prom I take I take with the after-party and I got a kiss. I'm so happy This is this is like the greatest moment ever right now tonight tonight I might my spirits are incredibly high and I'm gonna clown nine Well at the after-party I see her go outside and start smoking a cigarette have a few drinks and I see her start talking to this guy. I still remember his name.  This is not happening to me not tonight. This is my night So I go back out. I told my look my best friend John and I say dude go just go in there and tell her look I'm leaving now. She can come with or without me. I drove her two hours. I Did everything for this girl to try to get her to come for this night He goes in there and he comes up to me and I still remember the look He comes right up to me. He's like Dude Just go I'm like, what do you mean? Just go. I can't just go Right like I drove this girl He's like no Dude, just just leave I'm like why tell me like what why should I just leave this girl here? He's like I just watched her walk in the bathroom With Daniel following her inside and the door closes Just go and Again heart here Devastated I found out the next day that actually is a night Daniel lost his virginity Good for Daniel Not me. I just I just kept thinking, you know, what's wrong with me. It's not a fluke anymore Something is wrong here something is just utterly inherently wrong with me and I got into the deepest depression.  I look back and I don't even remember vague Memories of it. I remember falling down the floor just crying just shattered I did there was no community for me back then. I didn't know about this. I didn't have the answer All I knew was I went to go see a psychologist to help myself get over this depression and I found a specific type of psychologist I found one I can do hypnotism hypnotism and I told him I remember point blank. I looked him in the eye. I said Sir, make me forget Gabby and that happened. Make me forget. She even existed Make me forget my prom. Make me forget All these bad things that have happened to me in my life. Make me forget everything That's the extreme I was going all because I couldn't sexually escalate. I couldn't move things forward. I Could be friends some girls Maybe not even that was not really But all it came is I couldn't escalate things in a romantic level and at the time I remember I Told myself. I'm never gonna be speaking of this to anyone Never gonna tell these stories Because I was incredibly embarrassed and if things hadn't changed I wouldn't be able to stand here in front of a convention full of guys With tons of people watching at home. I'm able to share those things with you So no matter how bad you think things are I want you to remember I've been there. I know what you're going through So that brings me to my talk here on sexual escalation now when I do talk I'm gonna want to keep this interactive for everybody All right Because I've actually it's actually been proven that people don't learn just from a guy standing up here and talking to you Well, you're just listening You're not gonna learn that way. I need participation So you guys want to get ready for this? Come on. We just I just saw the energy in the room earlier. Come on. You guys ready for this? That's what up to a good participation.  What is the purpose? Why do we sexually escalate other obviously yes to get laid to have sex with the girl granted But when it comes to game it always has to be for a specific purpose of what are we trying to achieve from the girl? For the girl. What do we want to create with her? someone Comfort okay arousal Comfort we can do a lot of way and it's true though if you escalate correctly She should be comfortable and anytime you escalate you have to reserve her comfort levels always right However, the purpose of sexually escalating in and of itself is simply to get the girl aroused because if she's aroused She's going to be down It bypasses anything If she's aroused does it matter if your high value or low value if she's aroused for you does that matter? No Right Does any of the other stuff really matter if she's aroused and she wants you when it comes at least to sex relationships Something different but at least with sex does any of the other stuff out there even matter If she's aroused no All the stuff you learn beforehand all is just to get to this point of getting her aroused Now there's a big problem though. I want to go over the inner game of sexual escalation The number one thing stopping you guys from really getting good at this is sexual anxiety and it's real We all know we have a lot of people here know they have approach anxiety because it's belated in your face You see a girl you want to go and talk to her but it's holding you back. It's stopping you. You're scared You're shivering right Sexual anxiety a little bit more deceiving We could come up with new ways right a lot of people think I don't really have sexual anxiety Right, I'm fine with it. Some people know it. Some people do understand But I guarantee everyone in this room has or unless there's a speaker Has or has have one of these three inner game problems. I want to stress and I've had all three When I started I had every single one of these top three inner game problems when it came to sexually escalating I'm going to uh detail them for you and I'm going to show you the solution Inner game problem number one The fear of failure after getting attraction This was the first thing I encountered I get the girl attracted. She's you know giggling. She's laughing. She's looking at me longingly Why do I want to mess this up? Right if I escalate she could be like no, no, I'm not interested. I don't want to uh do anything like that Why would I want to mess that up? It's scary To have to have worked so hard. I had to approach. I had to transition. I had to win over the friends I had to get attraction from her. I had to get her isolated someplace. Why would I mess that up? by doing something like escalating And it is a legitimate fear Now the way to get out of this a solution is twofold one devalue the situation that's happening It's not that serious.  And it's true all it comes down to is devalue the situation The key little rule here is don't value the girl more than she's valuing you Why should you keep it equal? The other thing is invest in your game not in the girl Too much of us get this blinders on where we're like, oh my god. We got this one girl attracted I can't lose it Right. I can't lose this one girl that comes from scarcity That's it. You get abundance. You have more women in your life. You start approaching more, right? You start getting these uh, this area of your life handled that goes This one girl, right? My answer to you my solution for this invest in your game make a conscious choice now Not to get blinders on with the next girl you meet invest in your game invest in yourself Invest in a skill set that it takes to get good at this Because if you don't every girl you meet will be the one girl All right, didn't work with her now the one girl Didn't work with the one girl. It's like it's not that serious. There's lots of the one girls There's an abundance of them and that's the beauty of this The only thing to worry about is the skill set Because if i'm investing in a skill set, I can't not escalate Because that's going to help my game. I need to mess up. I need to fail. I love failure I love failure because the more I fail the more I learn If you succeed on a girl and it goes really well Okay, cool. It worked. Hey Awesome, but did you learn something what not to do there? No failure is a is a guide to learning correctly Have a good relationship with it All right intergame problem number two She doesn't want sex Right, this girl is not going to want sex. Look, why would this gorgeous girl over here want a big fat? Harry slob like me flopping around on top of her. Let's be honest, right? Why would she want that? I mean this she's not like the other girls. This is a good girl Right. She's innocent. She doesn't do that those nasty sex stuff that those other girls do She's probably waiting till marriage. I don't even know anything about her.   Assume sex. Let's just assume it's on If you're wrong and you fail good you now got a good relationship with failure. It doesn't matter Assume it's on if I'm alone with a girl. It's on and she's in my bedroom.  Let's say i'm right awesome. I assume attraction. I'm right. She's into me. Let's say i'm wrong I'm still doing the best thing for my game. I'm still doing the best thing I can do here Because even if i'm wrong even if i'm delusional I'm still doing all the actions that are going to help me create the attraction by assuming it I'm going to be more confident. I'm going to be more comfortable. I'm going to be more at ease doing what I want to do It always helps so be delusional.  I give you permission Problem number three in her game number three All right You know i'm not afraid of failure You know i'm Going to go for it right and i'm assuming sex it's on she wants it awesome But how do I go about it just the right way?  She's there. She's waiting for it I'm thinking all the you know, how do I go about this way? How do I do it just right?  It's now right You've got all the rest of the time in your head get out of it Now how do we do that? How do we immerse ourselves in the moment our senses?  How nice is that sound her giggle? Smell her perfume. How good is that smell? Feel her. How nice is she how soft is she? How good of touching is that? When you allow yourself to just experience what's going on through your senses It cuts out the head. That's the direct line into getting in the present moment Now who here has not been dealing with at least one of these intergame problems Exactly All right outer game When it comes to outer game you the first step obviously is to know what are the places to touch? Where is my escalation ladder so to speak so can I have a volunteer? Awesome come up. Like I said one participant. Yeah, get up All right, so this guy is going to be my da Vinci man. All I want you to do is bam All right, here's to the Vinci man, right now with a girl The erogenous zones are here and here, right? So The farther we get away from the erogenous zones the more comfortable The girl is with touch. So where's the farthest place we can possibly get here? The hands right hands and feet, but a little bit weird touching people's feet socially So the hands that's why when we introduce some someone so say hi to me Hey, what's going on? Right, we go for the shake what we don't do is. Hey, how's it going? Hey, right?  These are the little escalation of what's the most comfortable for a girl All right, I quote you to that. Thank you Now there's two types of ways we can escalate on this girl We can do smooth Or we can get a little bit ballsy Smooth escalation is simple Keep going step by step and we're making well step by step and we're making sure we're preserving the girl's comfort levels at all time If she's not liking it, we remove If you like it it we escalate Right We're always calibrated.  All right. We jump a few steps Now, why would we want to do ballsy escalation? When would it ever be useful? It's useful for well. Okay. What do you think? SNLs perfect If I want to do an SNL I need to make sure at some point I'm doing some ballsy escalation Otherwise it's taking too much time. I want to I want to screen and see how down she is for escalation I wanted to progress it So that's one case, but what if we're not doing SNLs? What would be another reason? Let's say This is the girl of my dreams Say Right I'm not going for SNL. Yeah Okay, also screening, but why would I need to get away with stuff if I'm planning on dating this girl for a while? But it is true that screening is a useful tool Make it feel comfortable. Well the ballsy escalation You're it's a helmery pass, right? Basically, it's going to go bad or it's going to go well, right? So the other reasons why you want to do this is because if she's resisting the smooth escalation if I can't reach this wall I have to bypass it It's a helmery play if that's the move I got to go with And if she accepts or she doesn't I'm going to show you a ballsy escalation later on kiss closing I'm going to show you what I mean by that On the other one is let's say he's not going anywhere Maybe I need to do something ballsy To escalate attraction because women respect that women want a little bit of ballsyness sometimes If you feel things are getting are dying down and you you need to break rapport If things are getting too comfortable too boring you need to do something to spice it up and ballsy escalation is good I remember I was one sitting out of club talking to this girl, but it was literally Like this was a girl. It was I was here and she was there Right there like I can't do anything. It's not a big distance But in a club when you're sitting down with a girl, this is the abyss of doom right here. Okay, I can't do anything So I had to go ballsy escalation in this case all I did pick her up put her on my lap It could have blown up in my face Right, thankfully it did it. She instantly turned the traction on she wasn't feeling me that much before I was trying to run all this stuff, but because of the distance it wasn't on as soon as I did that Her eyes lit up.  I just said I'm not most guys Get big smile on her face and she was following me around the rest of the night Again one of those hair married type plays all right Now when it comes to escalating I basically looked back at every single girl that I was successful with Escalating wise and I literally broke down what I do into three key phases or three steps At least my non-verbal game or my escalating game And I realized it has a lot to do with actual psychology. So I gave it the actual psychological terms here The first step is just comfort based. I have to get the girl comfortable when I touch It's the it's fundamental for everything with escalation If she's not comfortable, you're not escalating Right, it's just not going to happen. I have to preserve her comfort levels. So the first step I do is touch everybody You heard this it's there. It's gone. I'm touching everyone. I'm getting used to the fact. I'm a touchy feely guy. That's it Um some quick ways to do that Is to show low investment in my touch now. What does that look like? I need another volunteer There up This is the key with comfort touching low investment touch if I'm touching with everybody. Hey man, how's it going? Hi, how you guys doing? Oh awesome. That's so cool, right? If I'm doing with everyone. I'm not investing in anyone. Am I Right low investment if I'm touching there and it's gone. Hey, how's it going man? Right. I anyone of these touches that I care about If I'm like, hey, how's it going? Awesome, right doing really well. Yeah, it's getting a little bit weird. Isn't it? Yeah a little tiny weird Yeah, that's because I'm investing a lot of my touch Now I could do something like this touching him and it's not getting as weird right now There's some time there, but it was okay. However, if I'm explaining touching and I'm just doing this It gets a little bit more awkward as I stare at my hand cropping this man, right? It gets a little bit more awkward My friend adam really uh emphasizes when he showed me this little move Basically, I want you to tell me as soon as you get uncomfortable me touching you Whenever you're uncomfortable, okay All right, but he got there. So I didn't even need to touch him. All right He was automatically uncomfortable. It's nothing to do with the touch. It has to do with the investment So time how quickly are you doing it? Are you drawing attention to it? Are you doing it with everyone? All right, and do it frequently. That's going to help you with comfort. All right. Thank you now Uh, this now once your girl's comfortable. We have to get her actually wanting our touch. This is a big thing At least back when I got started this they didn't really teach us They just told us girls are going to want our touch. Use it as a reward system The next step is crucial We have to classically condition the girl to want our touch To the psychological term classical conditioning has to do with associations Uh, how many people are familiar with nlp here nlp terms? Then you know a lot about anchoring. Yeah All right anchoring is the same thing as classical conditioning essentially Uh, what I do is I'm going to boost her up with good emotions So can I actually climb my girl up here quick? Real quick Yeah, I should run. Sorry So All right, hand applause for yeah All right So, uh, well, I'll do is I'll start gaming the girl. I'll be talking to her and then I'll get her to laugh Hi, it's right one more time. So I'm talking to the girl and then I get her to laugh And I'm like, I know how funny is that right and then I start escalating And then I'll see something really interesting and I'll get her go. Wow. Oh, how cool is that right? It's so amazing And then I start escalating on her Right when I see key positive emotions, uh, coming with her That's when I want to start escalating because she's going to associate those good emotions with my touch Eventually what I look for is every time I touch her I get a smile Bam Now I know she's conditioned right. All right. Thank you All right Now Once uh, she's classic conditioned. I go into the third and final phase here That one is opera conditioning opera conditioning is simply rewarding and punishing. That's it rewarding and punishing So she's comfortable my touch She likes it now. It's something she actually wants Now I'm going to make her work for it because the more investment I get the more attracted the girl will become to me The more she works for something any guys do the more people work for something the more they want it It's a simple fact So I get her investing every time she does stuff. I like she works for it. She invests. I'm going to reward I'm going to amp up the escalation when she doesn't do something. I like I start removing it Now here's where a lot of community guys fall into a trap Our goal is not to punish the girl that we don't want this Most of you or most guys I've seen will punish the girl and they'll be like now I'm a badass Make you come back. Come on girl. Right. That's not what it's about I want to be rewarding because I want to keep it going forward. I want to go happy. I want to keep it progressing So if I do punish, I'm going to give her a smaller thing to do a smaller hoop or something that I can then reward her on Right. That's the point. We learn through reinforcement. We don't learn through punishment Which are at a very superficial level More way more through reinforcement. All right. So those are key three phases get her comfortable Classical conditioner make her associate good emotions with our touch Use that a touch as a reward system to get her to work for more and we keep rewarding and it's hard It's hard and and it's an intergame issue Why it's hard because when you got a girl that likes your touch every time you touch her She smiles and sticks your chest out a little bit more, right To not just be like a caveman and go. Yeah, she likes my touch. Oh, come here yet, right? And I've seen it. I've seen guys fall for this trap They'll just start escalating like a man man because you're like she likes it now. This is great And then what happens? He's touching her a lot. She likes it. He's making out with her. She likes it.  Okay And now she's a selector She stripped you completely She's the one putting brakes to it now. She's the one using her Sexuality as a reward or not not you now. You're just please. Let me get something. Please give me more Please give me more. Please give me more all the work ruined All right, so I showed you three phases phases of Uh, physically escalating but you can escalate verbally funny enough How is that possible? How can we verbally sexually escalate? Well, let's go back. What's the purpose of sexual escalation? What's the purpose of sexual escalation? Arousal do I actually need to touch her to achieve this purpose? No, I can use my words. I can verbally escalate. So how do we do this?  Funny things are insights of sex Her views on sex I guarantee to be a much more interesting conversation than yes, please tell me what it's like teaching awesome Oh, johnny was a bad kid in your class. That's horrible. Wow Much more interesting topics, right? So get the mindsets going qualifiers Qualifier and sex Okay, Rick challenges ask your questions that lead to more sexual context. What's the craziest thing she's ever done, right? What was your first sexual experience like? If that's too much you can go to something even simpler. When was your first kiss? What was it like just get her thinking and sexual terms and getting her to open up about it Uh, something recently I've tremendously added to my game Uh, within the last six months or so is uh, so eyes I should do the much later on I'm doing them a lot quicker now SOI statements of intent Something like wow, I'm thinking really inappropriate thoughts about you. This is not good Or oh my god, you have no idea what I want to do to you right now. This is bad I'm totally gonna be kissing you later. It's it's happening. I've gone kissing you, right? I'll start these statements of intent now. What happens if she doesn't accept it? What if she's like, oh, okay, you wish or no, it's not gonna happen or whatever it is Um, well if you use something I stole from our buddy sin, I'll just say we'll see Right, we'll see. I'm very charming Or uh, we'll see the night's still young Totally just devalidated So I'm going to throw in those. Oh SOIs to sexually charge it. She knows what I'm about.  Right, I know I did but I was trying to get into this lmr all the time Well, the way lmr works is you try to escalate on the girl and she pushes it away Right, it doesn't happen. She tried to escalate again. No Transcolate again. No Not happening can't touch this Well, how would you guys like to know a way you can sexually escalate that she can't stop?  She can't stop it. I might not be able to start doing all the things I want to do But I can talk about them. I can paint a picture. I can get her thinking about it visualizing it experiencing it emotionally And a more dirty talk. I'm I just keep going and going and going until I hear those five magic words Do you guys want to know what those words are? what But not sure Do you have a condom? All right, five magic words.   I could so I just wanted you to tell me how you feel, okay? All right, so I could look at her normally Right, and I want you to tell me if you notice any difference when I start talking. Okay, so normally Right All right, see how you got a little giggle. All right I'm going to hold my hand up, right?  I'm feeling sexual emotion I'm really feeling the that motion you get when you look at a girl like I want that Right just I want that If you do with a guy it should feel uncomfortable So try it real quick right now just look at the guy next to you and try and it'll work if you get them to feel uncomfortable. Try it See if you can do it Literally look in your eyes and be like I want that All right Come on You guys getting what's a little bit about I'll give you a hint. All right. I'll give you a little bit of a hint when you When you're looking someone's eyes quickly just normally just normally look in your partner's eyes real quick Real quick. What eye did you look at? Which one of their eyes? All right, your left right you look at the left Their right left, right?  I look at her. I look at the right eye or her left, right Uh, so this is normal.  Maybe a little bit of a cocky smile there Whatever it is now we can even amp this up more. We got the sexual eye contact down.  We start slowing it down We make everything smoother change our voice.  All right Once the sexual eye contacts down our voice changes it gets more deeper slower than the space You come in now notice the distance from here any guy this creates massive awkward tension If it feels awkward with a guy it's sexual with a girl if she's attracted And she's not attracted it gets a recoil emotion like whoa not ready for it Why could she not even so much of an attraction thing? It's because she's not comfortable If you get that all for example if I come in and I try getting section she gets freaked out or tense You just back off Preserve comfort love just back up And then start trying again all time preserving comfort levels But those three things massive sexual tension the eye contact watching my voice change and getting slower building uh Bridging the gap between us. All right Uh, usually this takes place when you're isolated with a girl All right next thing uh clubs I'm not hugely like clubs or anything But in miami that's pretty much the entire scene everything's a club type scene So I got really good at it And what I've used I found a way to make turn lemons into lemonade because the club scene is tough But there's ways to uh that it helps you for example. Who likes loud music in a club? You like the loud music, right?  All right Now notice where she stopped I didn't I didn't tell her to stop here perfectly arms distance This is the perfect place of personal space. There is a bubble right here. It's unspoken, but she just knows Arms distance. This is the perfect place to stop in a club. You can't we would not be able to talk to each other In a club. I have an advantage. I can breach personal space very quickly So let me go on this side actually in a club when we come up talk to her We could say hey my huh. What I come in and I talked like this I'm merely going to that moment. I'm not doing this.  They'll just go, huh? What? What right instead of pecking I can say stand up straight and go me like this Hey, right now it gives me an excuse to get personal space and notice where my hand goes immediately And I'll go right here because there's two pressure points on a girl that help cause arousal Is one right here where I squeeze that and there's one on the bottom of the foot So if I give her a foot massage back at home, you usually get this reaction, right So is that in here? So that helps me the side squeeze go in and squeeze your side talk to her I get a breach personal space very quickly The next thing if I'm already kissing a girl and I want to amp it up even further I can put her in a submissive frame Now I'm not trapping her in this. I'm just putting her I'm guiding her in a submissive frame She's still it's still completely her choice and she feels comfortable to leave at any moment So what do I do? Uh submissive frame for the guy for a girl is hands above head when a girl's hands are above her head She's automatically in a submissive frame So what I might do is if I'm talking to the girl and I'm already escalating I push her against the wall and then I would guide Her arms up like that and then kiss Now if she's not now notice what I'm not doing is this I'm not holding it, right? I'll guide the arms up while kissing and put the hands above the head now if she wants to get off So I'm just trying to get away. Okay, right totally easy. I'm not holding the hands. I'm just like this Right, so move out Easy I'm not holding it. There's nothing forced about this. I'm just simply guiding up Usually you want to do that after you've already kissed her Or like right before you want to get a little bit bossy with it, right? Because it just puts them more into that submissive frame. It's a primal reaction to it I'm not there's nothing about like misogynistic. It's just sexually men should be the dominant ones women should be submissive in a sexual sense Uh, the other one the back is they're coming in back scratch Uh, this one has to be behind but if I'm talking to a girl that you're facing me So I'm talking to so I'm talking to a girl and whatever I can make my nose across her back To amp it up a bit. I'm not like massively scratching her just a bit of a scratch, right? Fuji had another little nice one where like if they get things going a little bit He can ask a girl to give him a scratch here, you know, she scratches your back or something just to get her escalating on you a bit Uh, personally, I like to just again it's kind of a screener also I want to see how down she is while we're talking or something I'm rubbing.  I just rake and I can see where her reaction is They get a smile like ooh Or is it like whoa tense again tense back up preserve comfort levels All right Another one day two. This is what I use on pretty much every day two I have Uh, so let's say we're here and we're walking along we're arm in arm.   She's you don't want to do Poses. What's that? I don't know what to do at this point. Just hug and go now. It's okay, you know That's it We're walking along go. Oh my god.  No even better All right every time We're not talking about every day two another one. I do on every day two is to be walking off This is kind of me But I just do this for more for fun. We're walking along and let's say I want to like spice it up We're getting too boring Dady frame because a lot of first dates give kind of boring I'll see something like a little bush would be like, oh, yeah, be my friend bush And then really bring her back and like just like I'm joking with her, right Usually they'll punch me in the arm or they tease me. I'll tease them back I don't do that everyone.  I've really saw a student pull a girl's hair.  She freaked out All right, so I'm removing this from the whole community doctrine a whole idea of hair pull It is now officially called hair grab Okay, it is a different.  All right All right, put my hands up here and I grab I'm sorry. Yeah, it's a nice little happy face. That's what I want.  Well, I think this guy's like I can't experience that but all right ball guys aside Ball men inside Uh, when most people pull their hair and just squeeze it or hair squeeze hair grab Uh, the last one that this is I warn you now This is advanced technique not for the faint of heart if you have any kind of pregnancy issues or heart conditions do not do this I call this the because you're wet routine. There's something I should develop for my ex-girlfriend Uh, all right, so this is basically after you Kissed a girl you've made out with her whatever and you want to see if she's ready to come home with you that night At this point I look at a girl and I say I can totally tell you want me right now And usually to get this cocky look like how can you tell or like why is that? I'll take my hand and I'll put it out. I'll just slide a finger right between her legs And I go because you're wet I see Now I see Of course not a respectable girls like this, but no, of course not But I watch the reactions right and usually the jaws is dropped He just don't even know what to do the jaw just drops and then escalation becomes a joke uh from that it's it's Normal to pull within the next five ten minutes if she's if she's receptive and she's there talking to you right after that You're good to go um, the funniest reaction I've had for that and they did that to a girl and she's like please you can't tell I'm wearing jeans So I'm like I'm like granted. I'll check again right So you can just start playing with it a little bit All right, all right now for the kiss closing, right?  Thank you round of applause Very thank you. All right Now, how do you know when it's okay to kiss a girl? I have the distance test for the distance test I basically go what distance do I have to be where it'd be gay talking to a guy? So right now is this comfortable talking to you? All right about here not bad not bad. It's a bit of a vaser, right? At this usually it's about three hand uh hand spaces is awkward distance for a guy if it's gay like this Yeah, it's just awkward So if I can get a girl about this distance and I can talk to her and she's comfortable and she's smiling And it's I feel that it's on if I can wait 10 seconds Without dynamic going It's on I'll go for the kiss There's no gambit. There's no routine. There's no a little trickery. I'm just seeing I'm I'm basically watching her comfort levels Her attraction levels. How well is it on? Uh now what is okay. Thank you sit down. Thank you. Yeah now. Yeah, you're still up Uh, I promise you a ballsy escalation thing if the girl uh for a kiss, right?  All right. I noticed. Yeah, so I'm gonna go over the kiss.  Now. I don't get her lips.  I can start kissing her neck again. It's a ballsy escalation move I just bypass it. Just go on the next steps Uh from there I can escalate even more so Uh now what about the dance floor? Because it's a different dynamic here and the dance floor we're already like really close with each other, right? I can't do the distance test because it's not it's already socially appropriate to be that close In this case, I need a new indicator. I need a new way of seeing, you know, is it down or is it not? And for this I use the forehead to forehead If she's willing to dance to me by pushing her forehead of my forehand, we can dance like that. She's ready to be kissed I ask the compliance I'm looking for if it's forehead to forehead. She's ready to be kissed All right, you can sit down. Thank you hand applause So I basically broke down the inner game Uh going with you guys I showed you the outer games step by step of what to do I gave you some fun useful tactics you can use tonight Is that helpful to anyone? Yep, is that helpful? All right, now I have a really exciting announcement. I want to make with you guys All right announcement. I want to make is that just recently I have teamed up with who I consider the single best in-field coach I've seen uh today Uh, I look at it as like the team up of superman and wolverine Uh, obviously fuji would be wolverine because right, but But uh, no dj fuji is literally the best I've seen uh today And because you guys are here at the 21 convention Uh dj fuji and myself have put together something uh really special for you guys for tonight Here's what you guys are going to get Over four hours of hands-on personal in-field coaching by the two of us.   You're going to get hidden mics That way we get to not just see What you guys are doing. I'm not just going to vaguely have an understanding of oh, I'm watching this body language I think this is what's going on. I'm going to hear not only everything you say But everything that the girl says as well I'm help. I'm proving your non-verbal game just as much as your verbal game now Not only that We are going to do a full debrief. It is not uncommon that we take our guy We do it. Uh dj fuji speed of marine and since working with him, uh, we've basically literally got marine style on you guys We take you guys out.  You've done wrong and we're breaking it down for you There's no vague. Yeah, your body language needs to be a little corrected. There's no. Oh, just do a lot more set You're going to be fine. You're doing great While most companies will pat you on the back and say hey, you did amazing at the end of the night No debrief I want you to learn because it's not about tonight It's about every single night afterwards That's what it's going to be about And we want to make sure on the debrief that not only do you know every little thing that what you went wrong and went right But you have a game plan on how to keep getting better. You have a game plan Of what to do next in your in your development and that's why we will get results where others have failed I've heard the horror stories of guys who have had unsuccessful boot camp experiences or have had really just Bad experiences out there and it sucks But that's why we get results where others have failed Now in fact We're going to i'm going to throw in another bonus with you guys as well on top of this We're going to do a half hour one-on-one video coaching call with you after today after the fact all right Just to make sure you are implementing everything that we've taught you tonight I want to make sure that you guys are taking this to the next level And help you with your progression help you and guide you continuously All combined, what would this all be worth? It's about $1,700 Today, we're doing it for five hundred and ninety seven pounds However, uh, if you sign up for the next 15 minutes, I'm going to knock a hundred pounds off of that If you're really if you're ready to invest in your game And you want to make investing yourself if you ready to invest in yourself And guide yourself forward. Uh, we're going to knock a hundred pounds off. Uh, so four ninety seven Now here's my promise. Here's my little my guarantee for you guys if it is not worth every single penny In fact, if it doesn't succeed what you expect for tonight You pay zero I don't want to dime from you if I don't exceed your expectations zero Is that a deal or what? Nope. All right. I'm psych. Thank you for your time


milar thing with Main Street to your phasing point of we won't have the final design and therefore the real cost estimates yet. But there are multiple options about how that phasing could progress or what revenue streams we're gonna wait for. If we were to get the Northern Border Commission, that's a half a million and that's not even reflected here, what would that mean? What are those kind of key decision points that are going to come up in the next year or two and not necessarily how do you make a decision about it, but have you understand what that timeline, what those phasing options, what those decision points might be? Does that make sense? Sure. It all makes sense. No, no, no, don't worry about it. Any other questions on a Keppel improvement plan before we move to our next item? Well, thank you both again for your work and for coming to explain this to us. I think this also gets you guys started before we approach budget season at the end of the year. You'll have some foundational knowledge. I'm a spreadsheet. I haven't had any doubt. So our next item on the agenda is a resolution proclaiming May 3rd, Arbor Day. Who do we put on this? Oh, we only have this. I take no credit for this one. So all credit goes to Councillor Cochran on this Arbor Day celebration. I will introduce it by saying that we did this last year down at the OCC and it was a really nice event. We had tree planting and the tree committee there. This is a piece that's required for TreeCityUSA, but I mean, it's more than that. It's a nice day to celebrate what trees do for the community. Do you want to add anything, Jim? I think it's a great proclamation. I'll support re-proclaiming this day, Arbor Day. Any questions or concerns from Councillor? What's May 3rd? What else is on May 3rd? Can we have some other significant? The Greenup Day on May 3rd? So that kind of goes with Arbor Day, right? Yeah, yeah. I don't know if that's intentional. Vermont has an Arbor Day this about a week later than the National Arbor Day, so it might be, I don't know if it's aligned for that or the fact that you can't really plant trees. I'm sorry, I didn't catch this before. Is it really meant to be May 3rd or May 4th? I think it's May. It's the Friday. Oh, it is the Friday. Yes. Okay, okay. We're celebrating it on May 4th, religious to all reasons. Okay. Good job. So I would entertain a motion to approve the resolution proclaiming May 3rd, Arbor Day. So moved. Second. Motion by Jim, second by Amy. All those in favor, please say aye. Aye. Motion carries. Thank you. Our next item of business is discussion about the tree ordinance. I believe John has come back with some staff recommendations based on our last discussion. Correct. Very minor items. Just in general, I think it's gonna be very beneficial to us public work side just to have some framework around our tree assets and have some guidance on as far as like removals and trimming and just overall operations. Again, this is one of the other requirements for Tree City USA. But I just had a few minor things I'll go through quick. We had some commission and agency feedback. Basically all were positive. So Public Works Commission has reviewed this a few times. They are in approval to move forward with it. There's a couple of questions in the back that I believe were from the response from the tree committee regarding private utilities and tree warden in the memo I attached. We also reached out to Vermont Urban and Community Forestry Organization. So they're an agency that helps a lot of municipalities put together tree ordinances. There's a great link on the website that actually lists all the tree ordinances in Vermont. And then as you can see, it's pretty similar to what's being proposed for Benewski. They also reviewed it. Again, no really major comments or issues. We looked at budget. There's really no budget issues that we can see. So most of the items that are in the ordinance, we do anyways. So for example, if we remove a tree, we try to replace it as far as tree contractors, all the tree contractors that we've used previously have a certified arborist on staff. So we see no issue with that. And then this is also assuming the tree warden is either someone on staff or sort of volunteer with some background in being an arborist. And operations, we put in a few minor comments. Just, I think our only concern was for doing some late trimming work instead of having sort of tree warden approval, just making sure the tree warden's consulted on that. Either way, I don't think it would be an issue if we kept the language as is, but it's more of a, I guess, streamlining the operations.  That may help with some of the concerns about sort of residential penalties. If a dead tree is overhanging the right way, it's sort of similar to what we have right now for civil penalties. Councilor Duncan, we had some discussion on sort of defining the street tree versus private tree. That's also in some of the track changes. That is one that you could go either way on. So for example, you could say a street tree, which is city owned, is mostly contained in the right of way based on some parameters of the tree. Or you could say, if a part of the tree is touching the right of way, then it's a street tree. The other reason I bring that up is that's probably one of the things I've run into the most with trees who owns it. If it's partially in the right way or a little bit in the right way, that's one of those items that seems to always come up. So I think we'll just have to clearly define how we want to structure that. But no, overall, I think it's gonna be a real benefit of us. Yeah, looking at the track changes in your notes in here, I think everything that I had noted from our last discussion on this was addressed. I don't have any particular specific questions. Sounds like you and Jim already touched base, so that's good. I think that's on editorial points. Open it up too. I just have one question about the tree warden. She will be selected from her staff. How will that person be trained or supported to kind of have a lot of enforcement authority? Yeah, that one needs some discussion. Who will be the tree warden? So the way it's written currently is if the council doesn't point someone, then it reverts to me. I am not a tree person. So I would have to rely on an arborist to sort of place direction, which that's what we do now. So if there's a tree that's really in question of what has to be done, we reach out to an arborist to look at that. I'm talking with the Vermont Urban Community Forestry folks, other municipalities, the way they operate. It sounds like it's about 50-50 with municipalities, so it's either a volunteer person, typically a retired person that was in the forestry department or has experience. They're the tree warden, or it's someone on the sort of administrative staff that does that. I saw in here that it said something about the city couldn't perform the abatement and then charge the resident later. Can you just talk a little bit more about what that process would look like? Yeah, so that was some example language from an ordinance, I think it was in Montpelier. So what that does is, so if there is a private tree that needs to be removed or trimmed because it's creating a potential hazard for the right-of-way, that would allow the city to come in or hire a contractor to come in to do that work and build the city. So the one benefit of that is instead of having that sort of day charge that's currently in here where you get a fee every day that you don't comply, this would let us take action on that and potentially put it on their tax bill or... And then there's just charge of flat rate versus that fee every day that it's not taken care of. Yeah, so one, I hope this doesn't happen. I mean, so in previous Ms. Kelly's, I've never seen this actually occur where there's a tree that's right on the right-of-way and it's a hazard and we have to like force the property or take it down. Again, I hope this never becomes an issue but what I've seen done is, or what I would imagine being done is a contractor would have to come in and cut that tree, which unfortunately that's a pretty expensive cost and then somehow that has to be paid by the property owner. And I think at the last meeting we had talked about, was there any sort of special fund that we could maybe help offset some of that? Was there any further discussion about that for residents? I am not aware of any funding can be used. Especially if someone's in financial hardship, you can't expect them to pay $2,000 to remove a tree. Well, I think it sounds like some of that would be taken care of by the city up front. Yeah, I think it's- And then they'll be billed later, but still if it's $2,000 or something like.  So to me, if there's a private tree, the limbs overhang the right-of-way, that would be our responsibility to cut back that limb. We've seen that done before, but if it's the entire tree that's private and it's kind of overhang the right-of-way and it's deemed to be a hazard, then we would have to take some sort of action. So we would have a contract to remove it. We would get a bill and then the bill would be sent to the property owner by some means. Again, I think that's a pretty rare case, but that's the way it's written right now. Is there anything in that? I guess if someone has like a bill structure that's failing next to a right-of-way, that could collapse, the city could actually remove that, cause that structure to be removed. I'm not sure. I mean, it's pretty typical from when I've seen other municipalities, their ordinances, but I'm not sure if ours carries that. Yeah, I was wondering the same thing. Like generally, do we have other scenarios where we abate something because we need to, because of liability or something, and then it's dealt with in a similar fashion? Great. So I think the closest we have is emergency scenarios where we take action to like board up a property that has had a fire, but often that's translated to, like it's passed on to insurance companies. It's not a city-funded thing. So someone that lives on a fixed income may have a real hard time, even if you add it to their taxes. I'm trying to figure out in my mind how someone without experiencing another hardship somewhere, if it's not, I mean, act of God or pass. I think we need a public better solution for someone that's in that fixed income bracket or a financial hardship bracket. I think something needs to be done to help the citizen in my opinion. But I find it hard to speculate with something that's rare. So it's, you know, what do you draw the line? I mean, we can't, I don't know, we can't prepare for every possible scenario. And it's a property made this question. It ultimately comes down to maintaining property to be free of threat to yourself. And now there's nothing insurance looks at that too.  So I think there's kind of a, there's a set of examples of trying courage against having trees become dead and hazardous and threatening life and property. And I think that I get the challenge that it could pose in a few outside cases, but a tree doesn't die overnight, it's been dying for years and that's not been taken care of. So I see that as kind of a, is it deferred cost that then ends up being born all at once versus right over time? And I don't know if the city has the ability to say like spread it over several property tax bills instead of filling it all at once. I mean, that would be something that where you could we spread the impact out potentially, but ultimately the cost is still property maintenance cost. Well, and I think what that really gets to is there, this work is being done right now. They're gonna see this bill later. They get more time to come up with funds. But also what if they don't pay it? Like do we have procedures in place to deal with that too? Yeah, I mean, so what we're kind of recommending is pointing back to the standard sort of civil penalties that we have in our ordinance instead of sort of creating a new penalty structure. So it'd be basically what we're doing now for those, I guess, civil penalty type issues. One thing you could do. So we had talked about this. So street tree, city tree versus private tree, you can define it as fully in the right way or partially in the right way. So one mitigation measure would be if a tree is touching the right way, then it's considered a street tree and it's a city tree and it's our issue versus saying, okay, if it's mostly in the right way and then it's us or mostly in the private lot, say the other side, it's private. So that's one way to mitigate potentially one of those issues. But again, to Hal's, as Hal mentioned, it's, I think it's pretty rare that you're gonna see those types of... Would that be in the easement zone for the city? I mean, what's the, like 15 feet from Southern Road is that? What's the easement? Yeah, so the right-of-way differs. It depends on the street. We have a list of different right-of-ways for each street. So that's the determining line. So center of the road and then if it's a 66 foot right-of-way, 33 on either side of the center line. I'm more than comfortable aligning this to existing civil penalties and not creating something new. That's actually one thing that I liked about the edits that were made is that we do point back to existing guidance instead of creating something new and it streamlines and aligns the process. Are there questions, concerns that remain? Are you all comfortable with leaning on the existing civil penalty structure? Yes. For now. So this item is only out for discussion. I imagine you would be coming back at a later date with a... Next week. Yep. Awesome. So we can move to our next item on the agenda, which is another discussion item. The equity and diversity summits. Thanks, y'all. Thanks, guys. Thank you. So, do you want... Sure. So first, thank you all so much for giving so generously of your time on April 6th. Much of the feedback I've heard about the day has been very positive that people really enjoyed the opportunity to come together as community and have some conversations and connect to one another. My purpose in bringing this to you today is really to codify the discussion you all had in the afternoon affinity group and make sure that that conversation was now out in public, as well as to provide you with the participant feedback that people put up on the wall at the end of the day. Helen Christine and I did have a debrief meeting as we said earlier with Sue and Keisha today to start to kind of talk about our experience of the day, what worked well, what didn't, and to start talking about some next steps. But really we wanted to, I wanted to allow the five of you to have kind of a debrief conversation. You know, ultimately this is a council priority, so how do you all want to move forward? Thanks, Jesse. So one thing that I wanted to, for us to discuss is, do you see in this memo like your takeaways reflected, what do we think is the biggest takeaway from this meeting? And then thinking about, we have this contract with Sue and Keisha for this training and there's still additional work that's to be done and we have flexibility on how they're gonna carry that out. So we can get a, I'd like to get a sense today of, you know, what we might want that to look like. I thought it was enlightening. I thought learning some of the history was, it wasn't enlightening, it was kind of dark. Some of the stuff in the past histories and I think if this goes on, like the next summit, I would like to see more positive moving on. How do we, how does everyone in the diverse community coexist together by interacting together? I think the first summit was great, diving into the past, of passing and indiscretions, but now I think maybe second or third summit that we go on, how can we do people are positive on instead of dwelling on the past? How do we look forward to 2020 or 2021 would be something I'd like to see. I mean, Jesse, thanks for putting pool party on us. You came up with them several times. It was interesting meeting some new people too. The high school students did a great job, I felt. They're really prepared and I was impressed by them and that was a positive thing that I've learned some things about when it was getting out. And I'd be interested in doing it again. I would share that to your comment about how do we move forward together as a diverse community in a positive direction? I think that's the end goal, right? And one of my big takeaways was about relationship building and trying to build more relationships across communities and groups simultaneously as people in position of power thinking about the relationships that we do have and don't have as we're making decisions and that we can be leaders in that work of relationship building. I mean, I'll say that I agree that I think that these do reflect my understanding of our conversations. I think it was nice to have them around and put them down. And thank you, Jesse, for also taking a stab at kind of some summary commentary on that. And I also think that having skimmed through some of the analytical tools, like maybe this is just where my mind goes and kind of process development. I thought the analytical tools could be really useful places for us to be thinking about how to institutionalize some processes that we, because I think there is a tendency to slip, especially when we get into budget season or we're gonna be busy with other things personally and professionally that how we have tools in place or processes in place that kind of keep us grounded or have bound like guardrails or guide posts to keep us going. So I think some analytical tools like that could be worth evaluating as a group to see if we can start applying some of these similar to we apply which of our strategic vision areas that these fit in. What is the equity assessment around these? It takes a lot, it takes more work and I think it should take council work to do some of that work. But I think that could be a useful next step to consider. And then I think looking through the long list of input that was put up on those pieces of paper and thinking about what are measurable indicators we could actually move the needle on in two to three years as a council will be something that's worth discussing in our strategy session because some of them I think sound like great ideas but they're not very measurable and some of them are measurable but they take a long time and there's probably some there in that sweet spot that it would be nice to have at least one or two items we could focus on trying to move the needle on say engagement commissions or supporting childcare if that's the need I think figuring out what those needs are. So that's kind of some takeaways as I was reading through this is like how do we pick up from this really big list of good ideas, how do we pick up something that we can manage and also try and bring some of that learning and sensitivity into our decision making process through tools or process. That could be a good idea. We take some of the ones that we choose and maybe have a summit on those topics and move on, you know, branch off those. I think that's a good idea. Like the highest rating. Yeah, I mean. So from the debrief today with Sue and Keisha and kind of like what the contract was sort of structured as is that I think the initial description was something to the effect of they would move forward like a, I guess a smaller group of people like a more of a focus group. And a very diverse representative focus group would move forward through a series of dialogues as kind of a deep dive. And so what we discuss is potentially going that route taking this information and having that group work talk it out, talk to others in the community to get to that point of like what are the priority issues? Where do you want to see work? Are there things that aren't represented? Which would be kind of like a, kind of like how our commissions are committees function but in a different way, which would also be a little bit of a, it also be kind of trying out a different structure. Learning care for sure. Yeah, the other, the other option or sort of the other direction that was described is taking more of a broad approach. So trying to bring these kind of discussions to more members of the community. That I feel like during and correct me if I'm wrong, but doing our discussion, see more logistically ambiguous to move forward with. Right. And I think to the point of having this small, select, diverse group that's more representative of our community, it could be structured as a pilot. So it gets to your point, Jim, about how to come up with a process and that can be applied to housing or wherever, in terms of how we make these policy decisions. But I think concurrently it's important to be aware that we have to do our own work. So it's just like with implicit bias, if you want to work on your implicit bias, you have to become aware of your implicit bias and then you have to learn how to manage it. And I think the same thing with equity, you have to learn how to recognize inequity. And then how do you think about interrupting it? So that's all personal work. So that's all important as well as figuring out how we're gonna come up with a list of things we wanna do. I think that's the ultimate goal, but I think we can't forget to do our own work as well. And how you had suggested doing learning sessions during council as one way to continue that personal that still seems like after this discussion they've had that seemed still like a potential path forward to us. That's interesting, because we also had a conversation about how we meet and all the different meeting structures that we have are somewhat rigid and kind of by the book and how do we come up with other ways of engaging people that allows for some deeper level conversations. But yeah, I think learning about this on an ongoing basis as a council might be something to consider. We'll have a moment for a 15 minute presentation from someone in the community about whatever that we can learn and grow as we continue working. And I've, people have requested to do that before from organizations around here to present to us and just let us know what they're doing, so. No. Can I just have a clarifying question? Is this follow up with Keisha and Sue above and beyond the $5,000 that's allocated? No, that's several, that's $5,000 separate. Okay. So it's actually part of a prior contract that was prior to anything. So it's not like we're picking out just a bunch of things. And is the timeline on that contract was the kind of timeline for next steps or is it like we need to be done by a certain time or if we can work like one hour a week or like what's the kind of intensity of duration? Through the summer, they wanna, we should, whatever we're gonna move forward with, have it happen before the fall. I like the idea of a small group. Like I think it's just a lot more manageable and we could get a lot more done. I think my only concern is, is there gonna be bias in who we choose? You know, because how do you do that in an unbiased way? There's a lot of people, I was actually surprised when I walked in and the senior center was full and I was like, wow, it was quite the experience. So maybe just getting their feedback about like how do we come up with a process to even like choose the individuals to be a part of this group that's not gonna be problematic. From what they did that choosing, is that something that we would need to do? Or we query them to see who's interested. I think that's where we start to see who's self-select. Yeah, who's interested. Hopefully you have a large pool and you can call down from there. Yeah. I think we'd have to reach out. I mean, I think some business owners should be there, some of the people in the community that are involved, volunteering or organizing, should be, you know, they might have some perspectives. I think the business owners will have a good perspective too because they will, like the Asian market, most of the people that go on there are Napoleon or they're from their language barrier. They know, they see them every day. So they might have a good insight of what their neighbors are talking about that can enlighten us or the community. Yeah, so we could potentially invite folks who did not attend the training to participate in these discussions. Can you ask them what a good number would be? They suggested six to 12. Six to 12? Yeah. Including us. Yeah, I was just saying. So we wouldn't all be involved. I think it would be similar like there could be a kind of like, I mean, depending on interest, I think 12 was the number we kicked around. And in fact, I wouldn't want more than two members of council there for the meeting on. So is there other input that you need from the rest of the council to kind of move that forward between three of you already with them? Is that, with this enough? Or is there other kind of aspects we should clear up or not clear up but clarify or decide upon kind of kicking that off? I guess I think if we think having a smaller, diverse group to kind of model this next step with this, that's something I think we could support. I think that'd be important to pass up. Yeah, so we could pass that along to Keisha and Sue and then they'll come back to us with a recommendation of how to take that forward. Yes, I'm thinking with the summertime line that we don't actually want to wait to many more council meetings. We do not. No, we don't. We don't get that going. Yeah, that sounds great. I'm not straight to me, I should say. But I guess I would just add to that. I think this conversation has been enough to move us forward immediately with their work, but I do think that this broader conversation is something we should all hold on to for our retreat planning as well. Because I think there might be some parallel work here between that small group and then other things like learning sessions at the beginning of council meetings or other things that we could consider that are less resource heavy but would be responsive to the participants in the room that day. That is a good segue to our next item. Sorry, I was just to clarify. So by May 6th, we'll have basically a plan for how those sessions will be conducted. Yes, and yes, Jesse, I'm glad you brought that up about also as part of our story due to the prior discussion and the work that we need to do ourselves. So let's, we want to schedule this. Jesse, do you want to introduce? Yeah, so this is something we have done for the last two years, which has come together as a leadership team and council on a Saturday and go through strategic planning, prioritization, conversation aligned to the strategic vision areas. I think from a staff perspective, it's worked really well to give us clear expectations of what you all want us to be working on aligned to your values. And then it's set up a reporting structure where we come back to you on a regular basis and report out on how we're doing to achieve things. I do think this year's will be a little different because we do have a lot of community votes and a lot of big projects that are underway and the master plan work that really outlines some very strategic, some very specific efforts. So I think it will be a little less, what's the universe of things we could work on? It will be a little more of a targeted conversation, but I still think it's worth spending some time together to do that prioritization. So really my goal of today is to say, are you all okay with doing this and try and come up with a date? Because as you see in the memo I gave you on the process of next steps, there is some pre-work that we do as staff to do some planning on our side to be able to give you good information and a good process in which to have these conversations during the retreat. So my recommendations were, so assuming you're gonna say yes to let's do it, my recommendations are, we don't actually have a date in May or June that our entire leadership team can do it, but June 1st and June 15th, the majority of our leadership team is available. I don't know when. No, you're doing the first, right? No, I'm here the first, I'm gone the 15th. Okay. Yeah, that weekend's usually graduation weekend for a lot of schools, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. And Memorial Day weekend's a weekend before the first, correct? Yes. So are others available June 1st? I could do June 1st, yeah. I'm good for both. And you said it's a half day, Jesse. So historically, we've done it nine to one. I think, I don't think we would need more than that this year and I think we might, it might be shorter. I can do it. Yeah, I could do that, that'd be perfect. We get my little league game out of the way first. So, and Jesse, you included here the policy priorities and strategies as they exist now, which were in your orientation packets. And so this meeting is a chance to take this list, see if these priorities are still balanced the way we want them and have that more holistic conversation about the work that's coming in the year ahead and where we want to focus staff efforts and our own. And can I ask, will we also be discussing commission restructuring during this as well? Mm-hmm. It looks like it's gonna be a lot of fun when it's forward to watching on it. And I think that sounds like a good thing to say. Where are we holding this retreat? So historically, we've held it at the OCC. We might do it at the senior center. I'm open to suggestions. It is a public meeting, so we need to do it some more accessible. I prefer the lighting in the OCC or I'm gonna win this. As long as sneakers skaters, I'm fine. I'm just gonna go with the game. Request for sneakers. Although, I do recognize that we don't have full control over that room any more come June 1st likely. Well, thank you guys very much for being willing to give up another one of your Saturdays. Sure. The fun never ends. The fun never ends. All right, so we're all in agreement on a June 1st. I gotta say, if you don't like strategic planning, you hired the wrong manager.  I get really into it. All right, so we can move to our final item of the agenda. Can I ask a question on May 6th or May, week of May 6th or May 13th? Does that have anything to do with us? No, that's for staff. That's staff. We do that. Okay. So this last agenda item is your consent and approval of a resolution that's in your packet regarding the UMB versus when you ski settlement, litigation settlement.  But I can tell you in public session that this resolution is very similar to the motion you took at the end of the last executive session with the last sentence in the first paragraph added, which is specifically calling out that the sale of the real property, specifically the ground leases, that you find that it is in the public's interest to sell that asset. Often in land deals like this, as we get towards closing, the opposing attorney likes to fine tune this language to ensure it meets their transfer needs. So I don't think it changes anything about the conversation you previously had or the vote you previously took, but it makes them more comfortable executing the agreement. The documents all stay the same. All of the other information stays the same. It's literally that finding of a public interest to sell this asset is the new thing in this resolution. And I would say that if it is not in the public interest to do so, we probably shouldn't be moving it forward. Hence why our attorney said it wasn't necessary, but this makes them feel more comfortable. So Jesse did put this on as an optional executive session. If anyone wanted to go over the decision that was made, but that is not necessary, if we are comfortable with this change, we could just move forward with an approval. The decision that was made at the last meeting, yeah. I'm comfortable with that. Would that make an executive session? Same. Same here. Then I would entertain a motion to approve it, the resolution, finding a public interest to execute the settlement documents related to UMBNA versus Wenduski. So who? Second. Motion by House, second by Jim. All those in favor, please say aye. Aye. Motion carries, thank you. Thank you all very much. That is our final item on the agenda. I would entertain a motion to adjourn. So move. Second. Motion by Amy, second by Hal. All those in favor, please say aye. Aye. Motion carries. Thank you. Meeting adjourned. Jesse, thanks for bringing us one more document.


I have two questions. Firstly, I'm curious about, because you're not on a limited plane and you're going at your maximum, is there any concern about safety if you're wildly gesticulating around?  Sure. I can touch on the failure. The idea about failure, it's a very, I've kind of blogged about this and talked about it, but what is failure, right? So studies have been done where someone can work a muscle to failure and that muscle can be stimulated electronically and still fire at a higher rate. So the muscle is not failing.  So it shuts you down, but it's more of a central governor system that's shutting you down. So the idea of going to failure is kind of arbitrary, but if you have indicators here, now you have something real that you can work against. I guess that's the best way. Right. And failure was a crude indicator of a certain amount of inroad. You figured that you started with a weight that is some percentage lower than what you can maximally lift and when you could no longer lift it, your muscle had been inroded or fatigued to that degree. And with that green range, you could do that as well. One of the ways I like to have a client do it is stay in that green range until they can't and that's roughly the same thing. I'm not having them pull as hard as they can out of the gate. By the end, they have an enormous effort and then they can't keep it in that green range. They're done. That's into the set. That's failure in the context of what failure's original intent was to be. Now back to your first question. Up to a point, the harder you pull, the tighter your form becomes. Think about doing a bicep curl with 10 pounds versus say something like what would be a five rep max for you. With that lighter weight, you can move that guy all over the place. You can wing your elbow in and out and so on. When you get heavier, the form, the path of the motion will tighten up because mechanically, that's the most efficient portion. And then when you get to the far end, it's sort of a bell curve. Then when you get to like one rep max territory, it becomes total body mechanics rather than specific joint and muscle mechanics to try and move that point from A to B. And then that becomes dangerous. That's deadlifting with the body like this because you're trying to actually shorten them. If you're like this, you've got a wide moment arm. If you go like this, the bar moves closer to your center of mass, so it becomes slightly easier.  So we don't typically see that on this machine that if a person is coached correctly, that's not a problem. Their form's good. And you also don't find people you don't see granny, all of a sudden firing her CNS to just recruit all these, you know, fast twitch fibers and putting herself in danger. She doesn't know how to do that. This guy does and so but he knows how to do it in good form. So again, it's all adaptive and relative to that person. Whereas you could, you know, on a on a deadlift, which can be a problematic exercise if you don't do it, right? You know, in a gravity based system, you could put the wrong amount of weight on the bar and hurt get get hurt doing it.  Yeah, what would you recommend for somebody who commonly gets inflamed joints after any sort of exercise? Are you eating in a paleo fashion? I just started doing that recently. But it's been like two months of eating what I think as well. And I still get inflamed joints pretty commonly. Yeah, most of the time.  I mean, under most circumstances the way people do it. And what I would suggest you is that most of that's going to be dietarily driven. Like the fact that the strength training sets it off is just indicative of the fact that you're pretty inflamed to begin with. Here's a good metaphor, because most people in the embark on a paleo diet don't don't, you know, an ancestral whole food real food diet don't really do this.  Say you have 10 cats and you learn you are allergic to cats, will getting rid of nine cats stop the cat allergy from happening? No, no, of course not. But you're doing that with your food. You've chosen the nine cats you don't like and kept the ones that you do that are potentially providing with problems. You might find in some people do they have to remove every possible inflammatory agent. Dave could tell you a whole lot more about that. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, and you'll get that whole presentation tomorrow. But that's a general idea is like people go, Oh, yeah, this seems like it's least problematic. But you know what? It might be the most problematic for you. And then the strength training just sets it off. I've never really been a big fan of machines. That's just how I've always been trained. And for the pulldown, it just looked like you said it was very static. Does this thing, can this machine like incorporate like compound movements and stuff that really will hit like multiple muscle groups? You're gonna have to find your terms because a compound, that was a compound movement. Well, he just Yeah, no, tell me what you mean by a compound movement because by in the weight training world, any multi joint movement, he was moving at the show is a compound. Yeah. Um, just the fact that he was sitting, I don't like any type of if you're like sitting down, it's usually not even with like if you're doing an overhead press, I like the stand, even with that. Can and or just like a body weight like kind of burpee movement or something like that. I like doing stuff that uses full body or a lot of it. Can this like achieve that or can it achieve that with little effort over like just a few exercises? Well, I mean, yes and no to your question.  Yes. And I think we might have a video of online of Keith on the army doing a standing overhead press. Burpee.  You like doing that. Is that beneficial? Sorry. No, I mean, it's something you like to do. It's an outburst of your strength and what you like to do. That's not part of our core programming. So to say, we're not saying you shouldn't do it, but it's something that you like to do. Does that makes does that make sense? I'll give you an example. I so I do on the industrial version of this that we have in the studio that I work out, I do chins on that, right? But I also like to do freeway chins with what I talked about the wheels hanging between my legs, all of that. Just because I like it. I like that movement. I like that as well. But if but I can tell you that inroading that I get on this type of stuff is 100 times better than what I can do doing that movement. So it kind of depends on what is it that I'm trying to do today and how is that relative to my overall goal set? And Keith will probably admit I mean, to a certain degree, he's addicted to certain forms of exercise. And that's not a bad addiction. But is that that's feeding another part of his, you know, that's the performance and if you will, and the psychological and yeah, people, people will say, well, don't you still lift real weight? Well, the answer for all of us is yes. And me, I'll speak for me personally. I mean, I probably dedicate the least amount of time to working out of the bunch. And most thing for my buck is here.  Yeah, I do. But again, it's because I like to do it.  That's where the, you know, really, your muscles don't know you're doing a pull down or chin up or whatever. They have one job and it is to contract and it's to do that on a very specific path.  And when your brain sends a message to fire, it bends the elbow. How it goes about doing that doesn't matter. It doesn't matter what you like. It doesn't matter that it's on the ARX, it doesn't matter it's a chin. All that matters is that this is contracting against the sufficient resistance. So that's going back to that point. You like a lot of things. We all do different things within that. This is a tool in the box. And you're going to find that some people don't have that interest like you do. And all they're looking at is what can I get for the least amount of time. And to have other people, I mean, we have athletes, big time athletes who are more like, I like doing X, Y, and Z. But I know that I do X, Y, and Z better when I include this. And that's how we incorporated with them. You know, power lifters, body builders, distance runners, sprint athletes. Because ultimately, if their glutes seem to get stronger, a belt squat on this is going to make them stronger. Because that's what the glutes are facilitated in doing. It doesn't have to be a barbell squat. They just have to be taxed, recover stronger, do it again, repeat. So hey, I'd love, you know, throw on some rage against the machine and knock out five sets of five chins heavily. I love that. I mean, that's, you know, but if I'm looking for time efficiency and super, super in road, I can do two pops of three here, five minutes, I'm taxed. I mean, I'm done. So No, you'll take three. Where do I find one? And how do I get it? And what does it cost if you're willing to share that? Or if not?  Again, we're in development. I'm right now looking at getting the omni-manufactured at another facility so that we can get it produced at more of a, you know, mass production rate so that the prices come down. We know the market dictates, you know, the pricing. So right now, again, I almost want to slightly withhold the price just because we're in that pursuit of getting the price lower. That makes sense. Is it going to matter where I live or kind of what if I live like what if I'm on YouTube and I live in Austria or something? Yeah, yeah, I mean, we literally do have these omnis around the world. I think I don't know if you connected with a guy in London that has it when you were there. But anyway, so yeah, we ship them wherever. We haven't gone down to Australia yet, although we've had some inquiries. But yeah, yeah. Okay. I think we're all done then.


If I had any advice for a young person thinking about a career in research, it would be study what you're passionate about, find a problem that really does excite you, an itch you want to scratch and just then think, what would I need to address that, what are the disciplines I need, don't necessarily think that the problem will be solved using one particular approach or another, be open to the possibility of moving fields as well, from chemistry to biology, biology to physics. I've seen all of these kinds of moves in my own career and indeed my own career partly illustrates that fact, so I think it's really important that we see people being very fluid about what they think they want to research, but probably underneath all of that a good appreciation, I would say, this would deny of computing, AI, mathematical analysis and methods, that's going to be the core for a lot of successful research futures going forward.