This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, visit LibriVox.org. Reading by Mark Nelson, San Jose, California. The Green Odyssey by Philip Jose Farmer. Chapters 1 through 3. For two years Alan Green had lived without hope. From the day the spaceship had crashed on this unknown planet, he had resigned himself to the destiny created for him by accident and mathematics. Chances against another ship landing within the next hundred years were a million to one. Therefore it would do no good to sit around waiting for rescue. Much as he loathed the idea, he must live the rest of his life here, and he must squeeze as much blood as he could out of this planet-sized turnip. There wasn't much to squeeze. In fact, it seemed to him that he was the one losing the blood. Shortly after he'd been cast away, he'd been made a slave. Now suddenly he had hope. Hope came to him a month after he'd been made foreman of the kitchen slaves of the Duke of Tropat. It came to him as he was standing behind the Duchess during a meal and directing those who were waiting upon her. It was the Duchess Zuni who had not so subtly maneuvered him from the labour pens to his coveted, if dangerous position. Why dangerous? Because she was very jealous and possessive, and the slightest hint of lack of attention from him could mean he'd lose his life, or one limb or another. The knowledge of what had happened to his two predecessors kept him extremely sensitive to her every gesture, her every wish. That fateful morning he was standing behind her as she sat at one end of the long breakfast table.  With it he gestured at the slaves who served food, who poured wine and beer, who fanned away the flies, who carried in the household God and sat it on the God-chair, who played something like music. Now and then he bent over the Duchess Zuni's long black hair and whispered phrases from this or that love poem, praising her beauty, her supposed unattainability, and his burning, if seemingly hopeless, passion for her. Zuni would smile, or repeat the formula of thanks, the short one, or else giggle at his funny accent. The duke sat at the other end of the table. He ignored the bi-play, just as he ignored the so-called secret passage inside the walls of the castle, which Green used to get to the Duchess's apartments. Custom demanded this, just as Custom demanded that he should play the outraged husband if she got tired of Green, or angry at him and accused him publicly of amorous advances. This was enough to make Green jittery, but he had more than the duke to consider. There was Alzo. Alzo was the Duchess's watchdog, a mastiff-like monster with shaggy red-gold hair. The dog hated Green with a vindictiveness that Green could only account for by supposing that the animal knew, perhaps from his body odor, that he was not a native of this planet. Alzo rumbled a warning deep in his chest every time Green bent over the Duchess, or made a too-sudden movement. Occasionally he rose to his four feet and nuzzled the man's leg. When that happened Green could not keep from breaking out into a sweat, for the dog had twice bitten him, playfully, so to speak, and severely lacerated his calf. As if that weren't bad enough Green had to worry that the natives might notice that his scars healed abnormally fast, almost overnight. He'd been forced to wear bandages on his legs long after the new skin had come in. Even now the nauseating canine was sniffing around Green's quivering hide in the hope of putting the fear of the devil in him. At that moment the Earthman resolved that come the Headsman's axe, rack, wheel, or other hellish tortures he was going to kill that hound. It was just after he made that vow that the Duchess caused him to forget altogether the beast. Dear, said Zuni, interrupting the Duke in the midst of his conversation with a merchant captain, what is this I hear about two men who have fallen from the sky in a great ship of iron? Green quivered, and he held his breath as he waited for the Duke's reply. The Duke, a short, dark, many-chinned man with white hair and very thick, bristly, salt-and-pepper eyebrows frowned. Men, demons rather, can men fly in an iron ship through the air? These two claim to have come from the stars, and you know what that means. Remember O'Ixvato's prophecy, a demon will come, claiming to be an angel. No doubt about these two. Just to show you their subtly, they claim to be neither demon nor angels, but men. Now there's devilish clever thinking, confusing to anybody but the most clear-headed. I'm glad the King of Astoria wasn't taken in. Eagerly Zuni leaned forward, her large brown eyes bright, her red-painted mouth open and wet. Oh, has he burned them already? What a shame! I should think he'd at least torture them for a while. Miran, the merchant captain, said, You're pardon, gracious lady, but the King of Astoria has done no such thing. The historian law demands that all suspected demons should be kept in prison for two years. Everybody knows that a devil can't keep his human disguise for more than two years. At the end of that time he reverts to his natural mesh and form. A hideous sight, to behold. Blasphemous, repulsive, soul-shaking. Miran rolled his one good eye so that only the white showed and made the sign to ward off evil. The index finger held ridgely out from a clenched fist. Jug Caxter, the household priest, dived under the table where he crouched, praying, secure in the knowledge that demons couldn't touch him while he knelt beneath the thrice-blessed wood. The duke swallowed a whole glass of wine, apparently to calm his nerves, and belched. Miran wiped his face and said, Of course, I wasn't able to find out much, because we merchants are regarded with deep suspicion and scarcely dare to move outside the harbor or the marketplace. The historians worship a female deity. Ridiculous, isn't it, and eat fish.  But they aren't closed-mouthed. They babble on and on to us, especially when one has given them wine for nothing.  How glad he was that he had never told these people his true origin. So far as they knew, he was merely one of the many slaves who came from a distant country in the north. Miran cleared his throat, adjusted his violet turban and yellow robes, pulled gently at the large gold ring that hung from his nose and said, It took me a month to get back from Astoria, and that is very good time indeed. But then I am noted for my good luck, though I prefer to call it skill plus the favor given by the gods to the truly devout. I do not boast, O gods, but merely give you tribute, smile upon my ventures, and have found pleasing the scent of my many sacrifices in your nostrils. Green lowered his eyelids to conceal his expression of disgust, which he felt must be shining from them. At the same time, he saw Zuni's shoe tapping impatiently. Inwardly he groaned, because he knew she would divert the conversation to something more interesting to her, to her clothes, to her stomach and or complexion. And there would be nothing that anybody could do about it, because the custom was that the woman of the house regulated the subject of talk during breakfast. If only this had been lunch or dinner, then the men would have theoretically have had uncontested control. These two demons were very tall, like your slave Green here, said Miran, and they could not speak a word of Astorian, and they claimed they couldn't. When King Rosmig's soldiers tried to capture them, they brought from the folds of their strange clothes two pistols that only had to be pointed to send silent and awesome and sure death. Everywhere men dropped dead. Panic overtook many, but there were brave soldiers who kept on charging, and eventually the magical instruments became exhausted. The demons were overpowered into the tower of grass-cats from which no man or demon has yet escaped. And there they will be until the festival of the sun's eye. Then they will be burnt. From beneath the table rose the babble of the priest, Jug Caxter, as he blessed everyone in the house down to the latest-born pup and the fleas living thereof, and cursed all those who were possessed by even the tiniest demon. The duke, growing impatient at the noise, kicked under the table. Jug Caxter yelped and presently crawled out. He sat down and began gnawing the meat from a bone, a well-done, thou good and faithful servant expression on his fat features.  It was hard to remember that he must exercise compassion and understanding for them, and that his own remote ancestors had once been just as nauseatingly superstitious, cruel and bloody. There was a big difference between reading about such people and actually living among them. A history or romantic novel could describe how unwashed and diseased and formula-bound primitives were, but only the too-too substantial stench and filth could make your gorge rise. Even as he stood there, Zuni's powerful perfume rose and clung in heavy festoons about him and slithered down his nostrils. It was a rare and expensive perfume, brought back by Moran from his voyages and given to her as a token of the merchant's esteem. Used in small quantities, it would have been quite effective to express feminine daintiness and to hint at delicate passion. But no! Zuni poured it like water over her, hoping to cover up the stale odor left by not taking a bath more than once a month. She looked so beautiful, he thought, and staying so terribly. At least she had it first.  They'd had to. I intend to be back in Astoria by the time of the festival, with Moran. I have never seen the eye of the sun burn demons before. It's a giant lens, you know. There will be just time enough to make a voyage there and get back before the rainy season. I expect to make even greater profits than the last time because I've established some highly-placed contacts. Oh, gods, I do not boast, but merely praise your favor to your humble worshipper, Moran, the merchant of the clan of the F. Nican. Please bring me some more of this perfume, said the Duchess, and I just love the diamond necklace you gave me.  I tell you, the Astorians are rich beyond our dreams. Jewels flow in their marketplace like drops of water in a cataract. Ah, if only the Emperor could be induced to organize a great raiding fleet on the walls. He remembers too well what happened to his father's fleet when he tried it, growled the Duke. The storm that destroyed his thirty ships was undoubtedly raised by the priests of the goddess Huda. I still think that the expedition would have succeeded, however, if the late Emperor had not ignored the vision that came to him the night before they set sail. It was the great god Axopatqui, and he said... There was a lengthy conversation which did not hold Green's attention. He was too busy trying to think of a plan whereby he could get to Astoria and to the demon's iron vessel, which was obviously a spaceship. This was his only chance. Soon the rainy season would start and there would be no vessels leaving for at least three months. He could, of course, just walk away and hope to get Astoria on foot. Thousands of miles through countless perils, and he had only a general idea of where the city was. No, Miran was his only hope. But how? He didn't think that stowing away would work. There was always a careful search for slaves who might try just that very plan. He looked at Miran, the short, fat, big stomached, cook-nosed, one-eyed fellow with many chins and a large gold ring in his nose. The fellow was shrewd. Shrewd and he would not want to offend the Duchess by helping her official gigolo escape. Not, that is, unless Green could offer him something that was so valuable that he couldn't afford not to take the risk. Miran boasted that he was a hard-headed businessman but it was Green's observation that there was always a large soft spot in that supposedly impenetrable cranium, the Fisher of Cupidetus. The Duke rose and everybody followed his example. Joe Caxter chanted the formula of dismissal then sat down to finish gnawing on the bone. The others filed out.  As he did so he was seized by the ankle and tripped headlong. He did not fall hard because he was a quick man in spite of his six foot two and hundred ninety pounds but he rose red-faced because of the loud laughter and from repressed anger at Alzo who had again repeated his trick of grabbing Green's leg and upsetting him. He wanted to grab a spear from a nearby guard and spit Alzo. But that would be the end of Green whereas up to now there had been many times when he would not particularly have cared if he left this planet via the death route he could not now make a false move. Not when escape was so near. So he grinned sheepishly and again proceeded the Duchess while the others followed her out. When they reached the bottom of the broad stone staircase that led to the upper floors of the castle Zuni told Green that he was to go to the marketplace and buy tomorrow's food. As for her, she was going back to bed and sleep until noon. Inwardly, Green groaned. How long could he keep up this pace? He was expected to stay up half the night with her than attend to his official duties during the day. She slept enough to be refreshed by the time he visited her but he never had a chance for any real rest. Even when he had his free hours in the afternoon he would go to his house in the pens and there he had to stay awake and attend to all his familial duties and Amra, his slave wife and her six children demanded much from him. They were even more tyrannical than the Duchess if that were possible. How long, oh Lord, how long? The situation was intolerable even if he had not heard of a spaceship he would have plotted to escape better a quick death while trying to get away than a slow, torturous one by exhaustion. He bowed good-bye to the Duke and Duchess then followed the violet turban and yellow robes of Moran through the courtyard through the thick stone walls over the bridge of the broad moat and into the narrow winding streets of the city of Quatz. Here the merchant captain got into his silver and jewel-decorated rickshaw. The two long-legged men between its shafts, sailors and clansmen from Moran's vessel the Bird of Fortune began running through the crowd. The people made way for them as two other sailors proceeded them calling out Moran's name and cracking whips in the air. Green, after looking to make certain that nobody from the castle was around to see him ran until he was even with the rickshaw. Moran halted it and asked what he wanted. You are parted in your richness but may a humble slave speak and not be reprimanded? I presume it's no idle thought you have in mind," said Moran, looking green over his one eye narrow in its fat folds. It has to do with money. Ah! Despite your foreign accent you speak with a pleasing voice. You are the golden trumpet of Minerox, my patron god. Speak. First your richness must swear by Minerox that you will under no circumstances divulge my proposal. There is wealth in this? For me? There is. Moran glanced at his clansmen standing there patiently apparently oblivious of what was going on. He had the power of life and death over them but he didn't trust them. He said, perhaps it would be better if I thought about this before making such a drastic oath. Could you meet me tonight at the hour of the wine-glass at the House of Equality? And could you perhaps give me a slight hint of what you have in mind? The answer to both is yes. My proposal has to do with the dried fish that you carry as cargo to the historians. There is another thing, too, but I may not even hint at it until I have your oath. Very well, then. Fish, eh? I must be off. Time is money, you know.  Green hailed a passing rickshaw and seated himself comfortably in it. As assistant major Domo he had plenty of money. Moreover, the Duke and Duchess would have been outraged if he had lowered their prestige by walking through the city's streets. His vehicle made good time, too, because everybody recognized his livery, the scarlet and white tricorn hat, and the white sleeveless shirt with the Duke's heraldic arms on its chest, red and green concentric circles pierced by a black arrow. The street led always downward for the city had been built on the foothills of the mountains. He had wandered here and there, giving Green plenty of time to think. The trouble was, he thought, that if the two imprisoned men of Historia were to die before he got to them, he'd still be lost. He had no idea how to pilot or navigate a spaceship. He'd been a passenger on a freighter when it had unaccountably blown up, and he'd been forced to leave the dying vessel in one of those automatic cast-away emergency shells. The capsule had got him down to the surface of this planet and was, as far as he knew, still up in the hills where he'd upped it. After wandering for a week and almost starving to death, he'd been picked up by some peasants.  Taken to the capital city of Quatz, Green had almost been freed, because there was no record of his being anybody's property. But his tallness, blondness, and inability to speak the local language were factors that he must have wandered down from some far northern country. Therefore, if he wasn't a slave, he should be. Presto change-o? He was. And he'd put in six months in a quarry and a year as a dock-worker. Then the duchess had chance to see him on the streets as he rode by, and he'd been transferred to the castle. The streets were alive with the short, dark, stocky natives and the taller, lighter complexion slaves. The former wore their turbans of various colors indicating their status and trade. The latter wore their three-cornered hats. Occasionally a priest in his high conical hat, hexagonal spectacles and goatee rode by. Wagons and rickshaws drawn by men or by big powerful dogs went by. Merchants stood at the fronts of their shops to make up their wares and loud voices. They sold cloth, grixternut, parchment, knives, swords, helmets, drugs, books on magic, on religion, on travel, spices, perfumes, ink, rugs, highly sugared drinks, wine, beer, tonic, paintings, everything that went to make up their civilization. Butcher stood before open shops where dressed fowl, deer and dogs hung. Deeders and birds pointed out the virtues of their many-colored and multi-songed pets. For the thousandth time Green wondered at this strange planet where the only large animals were men, dogs, grass-cats, a small deer and a very small equine. In fact, there was a paucity of any variety of animal life except for the surprisingly large number of birds. It was this scarcity of horses and oxen, he supposed, that helped perpetuate slavery. Man and dog had to provide most of the labor. No doubt there was an explanation for all this, but it must be buried so deep in this people's forgotten history that one would never know. Green, always curious, wished he had the time and means to explore. But he didn't. He might as well resign himself to keeping a whole skin and to getting out of this mess as fast as he could. There was enough to do merely to make his way through the narrow and crowded streets. He had to display his baton often to clear a path, though when he approached the harbor area he had less trouble because the streets were much wider. Here great wagons drawn by gangs and ships. The thoroughfares had to be broad else the people would have been crushed between wagon and house. Here also were the so-called pens, where the dog slaves lived. Once the area had actually been an enclosure where men and women were locked up for the night, but the walls had been torn down and new houses built in the old duke's time. The closest earthly parallel Green could think of for these edifices was the Green Project. Small cottages, all exactly alike, set in military columns. For a moment he considered stopping off to see Amra, then decided against it. She'd get him tied up in an argument or something and he'd spend too much time trying to soothe her, time that should be spent at the marketplace. He hated scenes whereas Amra was a born self-dramatist who reveled in them almost wallowed, one might say. He averted his eyes from the pens and looked at the other side of the street, where the walls of the great warehouses towered. Workmen swarmed around them and cranes, operated by gangs pushing wheels like a ship's capstan, raised or lowered big bundles. Here he thought was a business opportunity for him. Introduced the steam engine.  Wood-burning automobiles could replace the rickshaws. Cranes could be run by donkey engines. The ships themselves could have their wheels powered by steam. Or perhaps he thought rails could be laid across the exerdimer and locomotives would make the ships obsolete. No, that wouldn't work. Iron rails cost too much and the savages that roved over the grassy plains would tear them up and forge weapons from them. Besides, every time he suggested to the Duke a new and much more efficient method of doing something he ran dead into the brick wall of tradition and custom. Nothing new could be accepted unless the gods accepted it. The god's will was interpreted by the priests.  Green could make a fight against the theocracy but he didn't feel it was worthwhile to become a martyr. He heard a familiar voice behind him calling his name. Alan! Alan! He hunched his shoulders like a turtle withdrawing his head and thought desperately for a moment of trying to ignore the voice. But, though a woman's, it was powerful and penetrating and everybody around him had already turned on her so he couldn't pretend he hadn't heard it. Alan! You big, blond, no good hunk of a man! Stop! Reluctantly Green told his rickshaw boy to turn around. The boy grinning did so. Like everybody else along the harbor front he knew Amra and was familiar with her relations with Green. She held her one-year-old daughter in her arms, cradled against her magnificent bosom. And her stood her other five children, her two sons by the duke, her daughter by a visiting prince, her son by the captain of a northerner ship, her daughter by a temple sculptor. Her rise and fall and slow rise again was told in the children around her. The tableau embodied an outline of the structure of the planet society. Her mother had been a northerner slave. Her father a native freeman, a wheelwright. When she was five years old they had died in a plague. She had been transferred to the pens and raised by her aunt. When she was fifteen her beauty had attracted the duke and he had installed her in the palace. There she gave birth to his two sons, now ten and eleven, who would soon be taken away from her and raised in the duke's household as free and petted servants. The duke had married the present Duchess several years after his liaison with Amra began, and her jealousy had forced him to get rid of Amra. Back to the pens she had gone. Perhaps the duke had not been too sad to see her go, for living with her was like living with a hurricane and he liked peace and quiet too well. Then, in accordance with the custom, she had been recommended by the duke to a visiting prince. The prince had overstayed his leave from his native country because he wanted to start with her, and the duke had wanted to give her as a present. But here he'd overstepped his legal authority. Slaves had certain rights. A woman who had born a citizen a child could not be shipped away or sold unless she gave her permission. Amra didn't choose to go, so the sorrowing prince had gone home, though not without leaving a memento of his visit behind but here again the law came to her rescue. He could not take her out of the country and she again refused to leave. By now she had purchased several businesses. Slaves were allowed to hold property and even have slaves of their own and she knew that her two boys by the duke would be valuable later on when they go to live with him. The temple sculpture had used her as his model for his great marble statue of the goddess of beauty. Well he might, for she was a magnificent creature, a tall woman with long, richly auburn hair, a flawless skin, large, russet-brown eyes, a mouth as red and ripe as a plum, breasts with which neither child nor lover could find fault, a waist amazingly slender considering the rest of her curved body and her fruitfulness. Her long legs would have looked even more astounding among a population of club-ankled females. There was more to her than beauty. She radiated as something that struck every male at first sight. To Green she sometimes seemed to be a violent physical event, perhaps even a principle of nature herself. There were times when Green felt proud because she had picked him as her mate, chosen him when he was a newly imported slave who could say only a few words in the highly irregular, agglutinative tongue. But there were times when he felt that she was too much for him and those times had been getting too frequent lately. Besides he felt a pang whenever he saw their child because he loved it and dreaded the moment when he would have to leave it. As for deserting Amra he wasn't sure how that would make him feel. But then so did a blow in the teeth or wine in the blood. He got down out of the rickshaw, told the boy to wait, said, Hello, honey, and kissed her. He was glad she was a slave because she didn't wear a nose-ring. When he kissed the Duchess he was always annoyed by hers. She refused to take it off when with him because that would put her on his level and he mustn't ever forget he was a slave. It was perfectly moral for her to take a bondsman as a lover but not a freeman, and she was nothing if not moral. Amra's return kiss was passionate, part of which was the vigor of asperity. You're not fooling me, she said. You meant to ride right by. Kiss the children. What's the matter? Are you getting tired of me?  Well, I believed you. Half believed you anyway. But I won't if you try sneaking by without seeing me. What's the matter? Are you a man or not? Are you afraid to face a woman?    You know he's an affectionate boy and worships you, and it's absurd to say that in your country grown men are old. You're not in your country.  Come back to our house and I'll bring up some of that wonderful Chalusema wine that came in the other day out of the cellar. What was a ship doing in your cellar, he said, and whooped with laughter. By all the gods, Amra, it's been two days since I've seen you, but don't try to crowd 48 hours conversation into ten minutes, especially your kind of conversation.  You know it's bad for them. They might pick up your attitude of contempt for the head of the house. I contempt why I worship the ground you walk on.  Though it's rather hard to convince them when you do show them when they see the truth, still there was only one way to handle her. That was to out-talk, out-shout, out-act her. It was hard going, especially when he felt so tired, and when she would not cooperate with him but would fight for precedence. The trouble was she didn't feel any respect for the man she could shut up, so it was absolutely necessary to dominate her. This he accomplished by giving her a big squeeze, causing the baby to cry because she was pushed in too tightly between the two of them. Then, while Amra was trying to soothe the baby, he began telling her what had happened at the palace. She was silent, except for a sharply pointed question interjected now and then, and she insisted upon hearing the details of everything that had taken place. Everything. He told her things that he would not have mentioned before children, two years ago, but the extremely frank and uninhibited society of slaves had freed him of any such restraints. They went inside Amra's house through her offices, where six of her clerks and secretaries worked, through the living-rooms proper and on into the kitchen. She rang a bell and told Inzaks, a pretty little blonde, to go into the cellar and bring up a quart of chalusema. One of the clerks popped his head in the kitchen door and told her that a Mr. Arventi, purser of an Anandunanarga vessel, wanted to see her about the disposition of some rare birds that she had ordered seven months before. He would deal with no one but her. Let him cool his heels for a while, she said. The clerk gulped and his head disappeared. Green took Paxi, his daughter, and played with her while Amra poured their wine. This can go on only so long, she said. I love you, and I'm not getting the attention I'm accustomed to. You should find some pretense to break off with the Duchess. I'm a vigorous woman who needs a lot of love. I want you here." Green had nothing to lose by agreeing with her, since he planned to be leaving in a very short time. You're right, he said. I'll tell her as soon as I think of a good excuse. He fingered his neck at the place where a Headsman's axe would come down. It had better be a good one, though. Amra seemed to glow all over with happiness. She held her glass up and said, Here's to the Duchess. May demons carry her off. You'd better be careful saying that before the children. You know that if they innocently repeat that to someone, and it got back to the Duchess, you'd be burned at the next witch-hunt. Not my children, she scoffed. They're too clever. They take after their mother. They know when to keep their mouths shut. Green gulped his wine and stood up. I must go. You'll come home tonight? Surely the Duchess will let you out one night a week. Not one single night. And I can't come here this evening because I'm to meet Miran, the merchant at the House of Equality. Business, you know. Oh, I know. You'll dilly-dally about the whole matter for one reason or another.  And if this keeps up, I'll be dead in six months, he said. I'm tired. I have to get some sleep. She changed instantly from anger to sympathy. Poor dear. Why don't you forget that appointment and sleep here until time to go back to the castle? I'll send the messenger to Miran telling him you're sick. No, this is something I just can't pass by. What is it? It's of such a nature that telling you or anybody would spoil it. And just what could that be? She demanded, angry again. It concerns some woman, I'll bet. My problem is keeping away from you women, not getting into more trouble. No, it's just that Miran has sworn me by all his gods to keep silent, and of course I couldn't think of breaking a vow. I know your opinion of our gods, she said.  I'll give you a week to work on the Duchess. Then I'm launching an attack myself. That won't be necessary, he said. He kissed her and the children and left. He congratulated himself on having delayed Amra that long. If he couldn't carry out his scheme in a week, he was lost anyway. He'd have to walk away from the city and out onto the excertimer, even if packs of wild dogs and man-eating grass-cats and cannibalistic men and God knew what else did roam the grassy plains. End of chapters 1 through 3. The Green Odyssey by Philip Jose Farmer Chapters 4 through 6 Of course, there was nothing to keep the master from retaliating in kind, for the slave also cast off his legal rights when he entered. Violence was not unknown here, though it was infrequent. Bloodshed within these walls did not, theoretically, call for punishment, but any murderer would find that, though the police paid no attention to him, and the police did not pay any attention to him, and the police did not pay any attention to him, the police paid no attention to him, he'd have to deal with the slain one's relatives. Many feuds had had their origin and end here. Green had excused himself after the evening meal, saying that he had to talk to Moran about getting some spices from Historia. Also, the merchant had mentioned that on his last trip he'd heard that a band of historian hunters were going after the rare and beautiful Getzlen bird and that he might find some for sale when he returned there. Zuni's face lit up because she desired a Getzlen bird even more than a chance to annoy her husband. Graciously, she gave Green permission to leave. Inwardly exultant, though outwardly pulling a long face that was supposed to suggest his sadness at having to leave the Duchess, he backed out of the dining-room. Not very gracefully, for Alzo chose that moment to refuse to get out of Green's path. Green tumbled backward, sprawling over the huge mastiff who snarled with anger and trembled with hypocritical indignation and bared his fangs with the intention of tearing Green apart. The earthman did not try to rise because he did not want to give Alzo an excuse for jumping him. Instead, he bared his own teeth and snarled back. The hall roared with laughter and the Duke, holding his sides, tears running from his bulging eyes, rose and staggered over to where the two faced each other on all fours. He clutched Alzo's spike-studded collar and dragged him away, meanwhile choking out a command to Green to take off while the taking was good. Green swallowed his anger, thanked the Duke and left, swearing that he'd ripped the hound apart some day with his bare hands, the earthman left for the House of Equality. It took all the long rickshaw ride to the temple for him to calm down. The great central room with its three-story ceiling was full that night. Men in their long evening kilts and women in masks crowded around the gambling tables, the bars and the grudge stages. There was a large crowd around the platform in which two dealers in wheat were slugging it out to work off resentment, arising from business disputes. But by far the greatest number had gathered to watch a husband and wife match. His left hand had been tied to his side and she had been armed with a club. Thus equalized, they'd been given the word to go at it.  If he could get the club away from her he had the right to do what he wanted to her. But if she could break his free arm she had him at her complete mercy. Green avoided the stage because such barbarous doings made him sick. Looking for Moran, he finally found him rolling a pair of six-sided dice with another captain. This fellow wore the red turban and black robes and an oxican. He had just lost to Moran and was paying him sixty a quagger, a goodly sum even for a merchant prince. Moran took Green's arm, something he'd never have done outside the house, and led him off to a curtained booth where they could get as much privacy as they wished. He matched Green for drinks, Green lost, and Moran ordered a large picture of Chaluzma. Nothing but the best for yours truly, whenever someone else is paying, Moran said jovially. Now I'm a great one for fun, but I'm here primarily for business. So, let's have your proposal at once if you please. First, I must have your solemn oath that you will tell absolutely no one what you heard in this booth. Second, that if you reject my idea, you do not then use it later on. Third, that if you do accept you will never attempt later on to kill me or get rid of me and thus reap the profits. Moran's face had been blank, but at the word profits it twisted into many folds and creases, all expressions of joy. He reached into the huge purse he carried slung over his shoulder and pulled out a little golden idol of the patron deity of the clan Effeneichen. Putting his right hand upon its ugly head he lifted his left and said I swear by Zephen Kwan Kwaner that I will obey your wishes in this matter. May he strike me with lice, leprosy, lecher's disease and lightning if I should break this my solemn vow. Satisfied, Green said, First, I want you to arrange for me to be aboard your wind-roller when you leave for Astoria. Moran choked on his wine and coughed and sputtered until it is back. I do not ask that you give me passage back. Now, here's my idea. You plan to be taking a large cargo of dried fish because the historian's religion requires that they eat them at every meal and because they use them in great quantities at their numerous festivals. True, true, do you know I've never been able to figure out why they should worship a fish goddess? They live over 5,000 miles from the sea and there's no evidence that any of them have ever been to the sea. Yet, they demand saltwater fish won't use the fish from a nearby lake. There are many mysteries about the Exerdimer. However, they needn't concern us. Now, do you know that the historian's book of gods places much more ritual power in freshly killed and cooked fish than in smoked fish? However, they've always had to be content with the dried fish the wind-rollers brought them. What price would they not pay for living sea-fish? Meran rubbed his palms together. Indeed, it makes one wonder. Green then outlined his idea. Meran sat stunned. Not at the audacity or originality of the plan but because it was so obvious that he wondered why neither he nor anyone else had ever thought of it. He said so. Green drank his wine and said, I suppose that people wondered the same when the first wheel or bow or arrow was invented. So obvious, yet no one thought of them until then. Let me get this straight, said Meran. You want me to buy a caravan of wagons, build watertight tanks into them and use them to transport ocean fish back to here? Then the wagon-bodies, with their contents, ended up under my wind-roller and fitted into specially prepared racks or perhaps holes on the mid-deck. Also, you will show me how to analyze seawater so that its formula may be sold to the historians and they can thus keep the fish alive in their own tanks. That's right. Hmm. Meran ran his fat, ring-studded finger over his hooked nose and the square gold ornament hanging therefrom. His single eye glared pale bluely at green. The other was covered with a white patch to hide the emptiness left after a ball from a wing musket had struck it. It's four weeks until the very last day in which I can set sail from here and still get to Astoria and back before the rains come. It's barely possible to have the tanks built, get them convoyed down to the seashore, get the fish in and bring them back. Meantime, I can have the deck altered. If my men work day and night, we can make it. Of course, this is a one-shot proposition. You can't possibly keep a monopoly on the idea once the first trip is over. Too many people are bound to talk and the other captains will hear of it. I know.  But what if the fish should die? Green shrugged and spread out his palms. A possibility. It's a tremendous gamble. But every voyage on the Exordimer is, isn't it? How many wind-rollers come back? Or how many can boast your list of forty successful trips? Not many, said Moran. He slumped in his seat, brooding over his goblet of wine. His eye, sunk in ranges of fat, seemed to stare through green. The earthman pretended indifference, though his heart was pounding and he controlled his breathing with difficulty. You're asking a great deal, Moran finally said. If the Duke were to find out that I'd agreed to help a valued slave escape, I'd be tortured in a most refined way and the clan effin icon would be stripped of all of its rights to sail wind-rollers and would probably be exiled to its native hills or else would have to take to piracy and that, despite all the glamorous stories you hear, is not a very well-paying profession. You'd make a killing in Astoria. True. But when I think of what the Duchess will do when she discovers you fled the country, ow, ow, ow. There's no reason why you should be connected with my disappearance. A dozen craft leave the harbor every day. Besides, for all she'll know, I've gone this way, over the hills and to the ocean, or to the hills themselves where many runaway slaves are. Yes, but I have to return to Tropat and my clansmen, though notoriously tight-lipped when sober, are also, I must confess, notorious drunkards, someone to be sure to babble in the taverns.  I'll forget that you have to belong to my clan in order to be a crew member. Hmm. Well, what about this adoption by blood routine? What about it? I can't propose that unless you've done something spectacular and for the prophet of the clan. Wait, can you play any musical instrument? Properly, Green Lied. Oh, I'm a wonderful harpist. When I play, I can soothe a hungry grass-cat into lying down at my feet and licking my toes with pure affection. Excellent, though it would not be in an affection so pure, since it is well known that the grass-cat considers a man's toes a great delicacy and always eats them first, even before the eyes. Listen well. Here's what you must do in four weeks' time, for if all goes well or all goes ill. We set sail on the week of the oak, the day of the sky, the hour of the lark, a most propitious time. To Green the next three weeks seemed to have shifted into low gear. They crept by so slowly. Yet they should have raced by quickly enough, so full of schemes and plots were they. He had to advise Moran on the many technical details involved in building tanks for the fish. He had to keep the duchess happy an increasingly difficult job because it was impossible to pretend a 100% absorption in her while his mind desperately looked for flaws in his plans, found, oh, so many, and then as anxiously sought ways of repairing them. Nevertheless, he knew it was vital that he not displease or bore her. Prison would forever ruin his chances. Worst of all, Amra was getting suspicious. You were trying to conceal something from me, she told Green. You ought to know better. I can tell when a man is deceiving me. There's something about the voice, the eyes, the way he makes love, though you've been doing very little of that. What are you plotting? I assure you it's simply that I'm very tired, he said sharply. All I want is some peace and quiet, a little rest and a little privacy now and then. Don't try to tell me that's all. She cocked her head to one side and squinted at him, managing somehow even in this grotesque attitude to look ravishingly beautiful. Suddenly she said, you wouldn't be thinking of running away would you? For a second he became pale. Damn the woman anyway. Don't be ridiculous, he said, trying hard to keep his voice from cracking. I'm too much aware of the penalties if I were caught. Besides, why should I want to run away?  This was the truth. Though you're not the easiest one in the world to live with, a master understatement.  And it is unthinkable that I would want to leave you inexpressible, yes, but not unthinkable. He couldn't take her with him for the simple reason that even if she would go she would never fit in his life on earth. She'd be absolutely unhappy. Or over she'd not go anyway because she'd refuse to abandon her children and would try to take them along, thus wrecking all his escape plans. He might as well hire a brass band and march behind it out of the city and onto the wind-roller in the light of high noon. Nevertheless his conscience troubled him.  For days he had considered taking her along with him, but eventually abandoned the idea. Trying to steal her from under Amra's fiercely watchful gaze was almost impossible. Moreover Paxi would miss her mother terribly and he had no business exposing the baby to the risks of the voyage Amra would doubly be hurt. Losing him would be bad enough but to lose Paxi also? No, he couldn't do that to her. The outcome of this conversation with her was that she apparently dropped her suspicions. At least she never spoke of them again. He was glad of that for it was impossible to keep entirely hidden his connection with the mysterious actions of Miran, the merchant. The whole city knew something was up. There was undoubtedly a lot of money tied up in this deal of the wagon caravan going to the seashore. But what did it all mean? Neither Miran nor Green would say a word and while the Duke and Duchess might have used their authority to get the information from their slave, the Duke made no move. Miran had promised to let him in on a share of the profits, provided he gave the merchant a free hand and asked no questions. The Duke was quite content. He planned on spending the money to increase his collection of glass birds. He had ten large rooms of the castle glittering with his fantastic aviary, shining, silent, and grotesquely beautiful, all products of the glass blowers of the fabulous city of Metzvah Moush, far, far away across the grassy sea of the Exurdimer. Green was present when the Duke talked to Miran about it. Now, Captain, you must understand just exactly what I do want," warned the ruler, lifting a finger to emphasize the seriousness of his words. His eyes, usually deep sunk in their fat, had widened to reveal large, brown, and soulful orbs. The passion for his hobby shone forth. Nothing. Good newsmawine, his wife, the torture of a heretic or runaway slave, could make him quiver and glitter with delight as much as the thought of the exquisitely wrought image of a Metzvah Moush bird. I won two or three, but no more, because I can't afford more. All made by Eisen-Yushua, the greatest of the glass blowers. I'd particularly like any modeled after the bird of terror. But when I was last in Astoria, I heard that Eisen-Yushua was dying," said Miran. Excellent, excellent, cried the Duke. That would make everything recently created by him even more valuable. If he is dead now, it is probable that the Astorians, who control the export of the Moushans, would be putting a high price on anything of his that comes away. That means that bidding will be high during the festival and that you must outbid any prospective buyers. By all means do so. Pay any price, for I must have something created by him in his last days." The Duke, Green realized, was so eager because of the belief that a part of a dying artist's soul entered into his latest creations when he died. These were called full works, and brought ten times as much as anything else, even if the conception and execution were inferior to previous works. Sourly, Miran said, but you've given me no money to buy your birds. Of course not! You will lend me the sum, buy them yourself, and when you come back with them I will raise the money to repay you. Miran didn't seem too happy, but Green knew that the fat merchant was already planning to charge the Duke double the purchase price. As for Green, he'd like to see a man interested in a hobby, but he was disgusted because taxes would now be raised in order to allow the Duke to add to his collection. The Duchess, bored as usual by her husband's conversation, suddenly said, Honey, let's go hunting next weekend. I've been so restless lately, so unable to sleep nights. I think I've been cooped up too long in this dismal old place. My digestion has been so sluggish lately. I think I need the exercise and the fresh air. And she went on into vivid detail about certain aspects of her gastrointestinal troubles. The earthman who thought he was hardened to this people's custom of dwelling on such people turned green. At the suggestion of a hunt the Duke didn't exactly groan, but his eyes rolled upward in supplication to the gods. Until he had reached the age of thirty, he had enjoyed a good hunt. But like most upperclassmen of his culture he rapidly put on flesh after thirty and became as sedentary as possible.  Also a big belly and double chin were signs of aristocratic blood and a full purse. Unfortunately, along with this, came an inevitable decline in vigor, which coupled with the December main marriages that their society expected of them had given birth to another institution. The slave-male companion of the rich man's young wife. It was toward green that the Duke looked. Now let him conduct the hunt. He suggested, hopefully, I've so much business to take care of.  We'll use him as the quarry. But I think we ought to give him a chance to build up his wind at legs. Motherwise it would hardly be sporting, you know. The Duchess frowned. No. I'm getting bored. I can't stand this inaction any longer. She shot a glance at green. He felt his stomach muscles contracting. Evidently she'd noticed his lukewarm interest in her. This hunt was partly to suggest to him that he'd be meeting like fate unless he perked up and began to be more entertaining. It wasn't that that made his heart sink. It was that next weekend was when Moran's wind-roader raised sail and when he planned to be aborted. Now he'd be gone conducting the hunting-party up in the hills. Green looked appealingly at Moran, but the merchant's shoulders rose beneath the yellow robe as if to say, what can I do? He was right. Moran couldn't suggest that he too go along on the hunt and thus give Green a chance to slip aboard afterward. The day on which the bird of fortune was scheduled to leave the wind-break was absolutely the last day on which he could set sail. He couldn't afford to take the chance of being caught in the rains in the middle of the vast plains. All the next day Green was too busy setting up the schedule of the hunting-party to have time for Moran's army. But when night came he seemed to fold up inside himself. Could he pretend to be sick too and be left behind when the party set out? No, for they would at once assume that he had been possessed by a demon and would pack him off to the Temple of Apakwaz, God of Healing. There he'd be under lock and key until he proved himself healthy. The terrible part about going to the Temple of Apakwaz was almost inevitable.  Green wasn't worried about catching any of the many diseases he'd be exposed to in the Temple. Like all men of terrestrial descent he carried in his body a surgically implanted protoplasmic entity which automatically analyzed any invading microscopic organisms and or viruses and manufactured antibodies to combat them. He lived in the space created by the removal of his appendix. When working to fulfill its mission it demanded food and radiated a heat that assured its host of its heartening presence. An increased appetite plus a slight fever indicated that it was killing off the disease and that within several hours it would successfully repel any borders. In the two years Green had been on the planet to attack at least 40 times. Green calculated that he would have been dead each and every time if it had not been for his symbiote. Knowing this didn't help him. If he played sick he'd be locked up and couldn't get on the roller. If he went on the hunting party he missed the boat too. Suppose he were to disappear the night before the party to hide on the wind roller while the castle vainly looked for him. Not very likely. The first thing that would occur to Zuni would be to order the windbreak closed and all rollers searched for a possible stowaway. And if that happened Moran would be so delayed that it was unlikely he'd sail. Even if he, Green, hid in Moran's cabin where he would probably be safe there would still be the inevitable and totally frustrating delay. Then why not disappear several days earlier so that Moran could have time to reload his cargo. He'd see the merchant tomorrow. If Moran fell in with his plans Green would disappear four nights from this very night which would leave three days for the wind roller to be emptied and reloaded. Fortunately the tanks wouldn't have to be taken off because any fool could see that the runaway wasn't hiding at the bottom among the fish. Much relieved that he at least had a way open, if a very perilous one, Green relaxed. He was sitting on a bench along a walk on top of one of the castle walls. The sky was blazingly beautiful with stars larger than any seen from earth. The great moon and the small moon had risen. The larger had just cleared the eastern horizon and the lesser one was just past the zenith. Mingled moon-wash and star-wash softened the grimness and ugliness of the city below him and laved it in a flood of romance and glamour. Most of quats was unlighted for the streets had no lamps and the windows were shut up tight against thieves, vampires and demons. Occasionally the torch flares of the servants of a drunken noble or rich man moved down the dark canyons between the towering overhanging houses beyond the city was the amphitheater formed by the hills curving out to the north and the great brick wall built to continue the natural windbreak. A wide opening had been left so that the rollers, their sails furled could be towed in or out. Past this the great plains suddenly began as if the hand of some immense landscaper had pressed the hills flat and declared that from here on the hills would have been flat and declared that from here on there would be no unevenness. Westward lay the incredibly level stretch of the grassy ground of the Exurdimer. Ten thousand miles straight across, flat as a tabletop, broken only here and there by clumps of forests, ruins of cities, waterholes, the tents of the nomadic savages, herds of wild animals, packs of grass-cats and dire-dogs, and the mysterious and undoubtedly imaginary roaming islands, great clumps of rock and dirt that legends said slid of their own volition over the plains. How like this planet, he thought, that the greatest peril to navigation should be one that existed only in the heads of the inhabitants. The Exurdimer was a fabulous phenomenon without parallel. On none of the many planets that earthmen had discovered was there anything similar. How, he wondered, could the plain keep its smoothness when there was always dirt running on to it from the eroding hills and the mountains that ringed it. The rains, too, should have done much to wear it away unevenly. Of course, the grass that grew all over it was long and had very tough roots. And if what he had been told was true, beneath the vegetation was one mass of inextricably tangled roots that held the soil together. There was another thing to consider, though, the winds that blew all the way across the Exurdimer and furnished propulsion for the wheeled sailing-craft. To have winds you must have pressure-differentials, which were usually caused by heat-differentials. Although the Exurdimer was ringed there were no large eminences on it for ten thousand miles, nothing to replenish the currents of air. Or so it seemed to his limited knowledge of meteorology, though he did wonder how the trade winds that swept Earth's seas managed to keep going for so many thousands of leagues just on their original impetus. Or did they get boosts? He didn't know. What he did know was that the Exurdimer was a thing that he shouldn't be. Yet the very presence of men here was just as amazing, just as preposterous. Homo sapiens was scattered throughout the galaxy. Everywhere that the space-traveling earthmen had gone they had found that about every fourth inhabitable planet was populated by men of their species. The proof lay not just in the outward physical resemblance of terrestrial and extraterrestrial planets, it lay in their ability to breed. Earthmen, Syrian, Alberian, vegan, it made no difference. Their men could have children by the women of other planets. Naturally there had been many theories to account for this fact. All had as a common basis the assumption that Homo sapiens had some time, somewhere, in the very remote past, originated on one planet over the galaxy from it. And somehow space-travel had been lost and each race had gone back to savagery only to begin again the long, hard struggle towards civilization and the rediscovery of spaceships. Why no one knew? One could only guess. There was the problem of language. It might seem that if man had come from a common birthplace he would have at least kept a trace of his home language and the linguists could break down the development of tongue and link one planet to another through it. But no. Every world had its own Tower of Babel, its own 10,000 languages. The terrestrial scientist might trace Russian and English and Swedish and Lithuanian and Persian and Hindustani back to a proto-Indio-European. But he had never found on any other planet a language which he could say had also derived from the Aryan Ursprach. Green's mind wandered to the two earthmen now imprisoned in the city of Astoria. He hoped they weren't being treated badly. They could be in horrible pain at this very moment if the priests felt like subjecting them to a little demon testing. Thinking of torture let him to sit up a little straighter and to stretch his arms and legs. In an hour he was supposed to meet the Duchess. To do that he had to go through the supposedly secret door in the Wall of the Turret at the northern end of the Walk up a stairway through a passage between the walls and so to the Duchess's apartments. There one of the maids of honor would usher him into Zuni's presence and then would try to eavesdrop so she could report to the Duke later on. Zuni and Green weren't supposed to know about this but were to pretend that she was their trusted confidant. When the great bell of the Temple of the God of Time Grusa struck, Green would rise from his bench and go to what he now thought of as a weary some chore. If that woman could only be interested in talking of something else besides her complexion or digestion or idle palace gossip it wouldn't be so bad. But no, she chattered on and on and Green would get increasingly sleepy yet would not dare drop off for fear of irreparably offending her and to do that. End of chapters 4 through 6 The lesser moon had touched the western horizon and the greater was nearing the zenith when Green awoke and jumped to his feet swearing in sheer terror. He'd fallen asleep and kept Zuni waiting. My God, what'll she say? he said aloud. What'll I tell her? You needn't tell me anything, came her angry retort from very close by, and she said, what'll I tell her? She retort from very close by. He started and whirled around and saw that she'd been standing behind him. She was wrapped in a robe but her pale face gleamed from beneath the overhanging hood and her mouth was opened. White teeth flashed as she began accusing him of not loving her, of being bored by her, of loving some other woman, probably a slave girl, a good-for-nothing, lazy, brainless, emptyly pretty quench. If this situation hadn't been so serious Green would have smiled at herself portrayal. He tried to damn the flood but to no avail.  You know you're not supposed to be out of your rooms after dark unless the Duke is along. He said, taking her elbow down the walk toward the secret door, if the guards see you there'll be trouble, bad trouble. Let's go. Unfortunately the guards did see them. Torches appeared at the foot of the steps below the walk and iron helmets and curasses gleamed. Green tried to urge her on faster for there was still time to make it to the door.  The Duchess of Tropat doesn't allow herself to be pushed around by a blonde beast.  He snarled and shoved her.  You won't be tortured if they find us together. Zuni jerked away. Her face twisted and her mouth worked soundlessly. Kismayas! she finally gasped. Kismayas yourself! Suddenly she began screaming. Before he could clamp his hand over her mouth she dashed past him and toward the steps. It was then that he came out of his paralysis and ran, not after her which he knew was useless but toward the secret door. All was up. It was absolutely no use trying to explain to the guards. The situation had now entered a conventional phase. Tell the guards that he had come into her room through some unknown means which would be found out later and had dragged her out onto the walk, apparently with the intention of violating her. Why he should pick a public place when he already had the privacy of her rooms would not be asked. And the guards, though they would know what really had happened, would pretend to believe her and would furiously seize him and drag him off to the dungeons. The third thing about it was that within a few days the whole city including Zuni herself would believe that her story was true. By the time he'd been executed they would hate his guts and a lot of all the slaves would be miserable for a while because they would share his blame. Green had no intention of being seized. Flight was an admission of guilt but it made no difference now. He had a secret door, shut and bolted it and raced up the steps that led to her apartments. The guards would have had to take the long way round and he had at least two minutes before they could unlock the two doors of the ante-rooms to her quarters, explain to the guards just outside them what had happened and begin a search for him. As for him he was running like a rabbit but he was thinking like a fox. Having known that such a situation might arise he had long ago planned in detail several possible courses of action. Now he chose the likeliest one and began acting efficiently if not smoothly. The staircase was a narrow corkscrew with room for only one person at a time to go up. He ran up it so fast that he got dizzy with the ever-winding turns. He reeled and had trouble keeping from falling to his left when he did arrive at its top. Nevertheless he did not pause to catch breath or balance but pulled the lever that would make the door swing out. He burst through it. No one there, thank God. He stopped for a moment, listened to make sure nobody was in the next room then pushed on a boss set in a pattern of bronze protuberances which was connected with the mechanism that operated the secret door. The section of the wall swung back silently until it was flush with the rest and quite indistinguishable. He then twisted the knobs so the door couldn't be open from the other side. Green took time to give fervent thanks to the builders of the castle who had prepared this device for the owners to hide within in case of a successful invasion or revolt. If it had not been there he could not have escaped. Escaped he'd only put off his inevitable capture but he intended to run as long as he could and then fight until they were forced to kill him. The first thing to do was find a weapon. As a matter of fact he was so familiar with Zuni's rooms that he knew exactly where he could get what he wanted. He walked through two large rooms making his way easily even through the feeble duskish light that the few oil lamps and candles furnished. Hanging from the wall of the third room was a saber made of the best steel obtainable on this planet and fashioned by the greatest smiths. The sword writes of far away and almost legendary Talamasco. The blade was a gift from Zuni's father on the occasion of her wedding to the duke. It was supposed to be given by Zuni to her eldest son when he came of weapon-carrying age. The hilt had a guard and which was inscribed in gold the motto, Sooner Hell than Dishonour. He fastened the sword to an iron ring on his broad leather belt, went to a luxurious dressing table, pulled open a drawer and took out a stiletto. This he stuck through his belt also a huge flint-lock pistol with a gold and ivory chased butt. He loaded it with powder and an iron ball he found in a compartment and put ammunition in a bag which he also hung from his belt. Then well armed he walked out onto the balcony with a quick view of the situation. Three stories below him was the walk which he had left a few minutes before. Many soldiers and Zuni were standing there all looking up. As his face came into sight visible in the moonlight and the up-reaching flares of their torches a shout arose. Several of the musket men raised their long-barrelled weapons but Zuni cried out for them to hold their fire their skin prickled at the vindictiveness in her voice and at the vision of what she was probably planning for him. He'd been forced to see too many tortures and public executions not to know exactly what she designed for him. Suddenly overcome with rage that she could be so treacherous and brutal a rage perhaps flavored with self-disgust because he had made love to her he aimed his pistol at her. There was a click as the hammer struck the flint a spark a whoosh as the powder burnt in the pan a loud bang and a cloud of black smoke. When the fumes cleared away he saw that everybody including the Duchess was running for cover. Naturally he'd missed for he had almost no practice with the pistols being a slave even if he'd been well trained he probably would not have struck his mark so inaccurate were the weapons. While green was reloading he heard a shout from above. Looking up he saw the Duke's round face pale in the moonlight hanging over the railing of the balcony above. He raised his empty pistol and the Duke squalling with fear ran back into his quarters. Green laughed and said to himself that even if he was killed now he could at least have the satisfaction of knowing that he had shamed the Duke in battle. Of course his action had also made it absolutely necessary for the Duke to have him killed at once so that Green could not tell others that he'd put him to flight. He grinned crookedly. What would happen when the soldiers received the Duke's orders directly contradicting the Duchesses? The poor fellows would scarcely know what to do. The man's commands would of course supersede the woman's and the woman would be furious and she would later on find some means of punishing those who did succeed in killing Green. It was at that moment that he lost his smile and paled with fright. A loud, deep-chested barking nearby. Not outside the apartment store, but inside. He cursed and whirled around just in time to see the large body launch towards his throat, the white fangs flashing and the green fire shining from its eyes as the moonlight struck them. Even in that moment of panic he realized that he'd forgotten the small door set inside the larger one so that Alzo could have admittance at any time. And if the big dog could get through then soldiers could also crawl through. Instinctively he thrust out the pistol and squeezed the trigger. He did not go off for there was no powder in the pan. But the barrel did jam into the great mouth and deflect Alzo from his target, Green's throat. Even so, Green was not backward by the impact and he felt the sharp teeth clamping down on his wrist. Those jaws were capable of biting through his arm and though he felt no pain he was sickened by the thought that he'd see a bloody stump when Alzo danced away from him. However his arm, though dripping blood from large gashes was not hurt badly. Green had been deterred by the barrel shoved down his throat, choking him so that he could think of nothing for the moment but getting clear of it. The pistol clattered on the iron floor of the balcony. Alzo shook his head, unaware in his frenzy that he was rid of the weapon. Green leaped up from the sitting position into which Alzo's charge had flung him against the railing, snarling as viciously as the dog he braced his feet against the juncture of the floor and the railing touched himself straight out. At the same time the canine jumped.  Though the huge jaws bit down at his scalp they snapped on air and the animal fell to one side growling. Green's seized hold of the long tail rolled away from the teeth now snapping at his ankles and bit the tail so that the dog would swing away from him. He rose to one knee, pushed the dog away from him, though still keeping his frenzy grip with two hands and jumped to his feet. Frantically the animal twisted around and bit at the imprisoning hands, but he succeeded only in biting his own flank. Howling in anguish he tried to lunge away. Green, making a supreme effort, raised the tail in the air. Naturally the body came along with it.  The terrible growling suddenly changed into a high pitched howl of despair as Alzo flew over the railing and out into the air over the walk. Green, leaning over to watch him, did not feel sorry for him. He was exultant. He'd hated that dog and had dreamed of just such a moment. Alzo's yelping was cut off as he struck the parapet beside the walk, bounced off, and then dropped from view into the depths beyond. Green's strength had been greater than he'd suspected, for he had thought only to toss the one hundred and fifty pound beast over the railing. There was a favoring triumph. If the dog could get through that little door so could the soldiers. He ran out into the room expecting that at least a dozen men had crawled in. But there was no one. Why? The only thing he could think of was that they were afraid, knowing that if he at once dispatched the dog he could leisurely knock them over the head in their helpless on-all forest position. The door shook beneath a mighty wall. They'd taken the wiser if the less courageous course of battering rams. Green loaded his pistol, spilling the powder at his first attempt to prime the pan because his hands shook so. He fired, and a large hole appeared in the wood. However, part of the ball also stuck out, for the door was planked thickly against just such weapons. The battering ceased, and he heard a thud as the ram was dropped in a hasty retreat. He smiled. As they were still operating under the Duchess's instructions to take him alive, not yet countermanded by the dukes, they would not want to face pistol fire with only swords in hand. And in the first reflex to the shot, they'd undoubtedly forgotten that a ball couldn't penetrate the wood. This is living, said Green out loud. And he wondered that his voice shook as much as his legs did, and yet he felt a wild exultance shooting through his fear, and knew that he was tasting both with a fine liking. Perhaps he thought he really liked this moment, even if his death was around the corner, because he'd been repressed so long and violence was a wonderful therapy for releasing his resentment and clamped down on fury. Whatever the reason, he knew that this was one of the high levels of his life, and that if he survived, he'd look back on it with pleasure and pride. And that was the strangest thing of all, since in his culture the young were taught to abhor violence. Luckily they weren't so conditioned against it that the very thought of it paralyzed them. No hard neural pass had been set up against the action of violence. It was just that, philosophically speaking, they loathed the concept. Fortunately there was a philosophy of the body too, a much older and deeper one, and while it was true that man could no more live without philosophy of the mind than he could without bread, it had no place in green at present. The fiery breath that flooded his body now, and made him so sensitive to what a fine thing it was to be alive while death was knocking at the door did not rise from any mental abstraction or profound meditation. Green rolled back the carpets that led from the room to the balcony, for he wanted to firm footing if it became necessary to make a running broad jump from the balcony in an effort to clear the walk below and drop into the moat. He'd have to have very good timing and do everything just right the first time, like a parachute jump, otherwise he'd end up with broken bones on the hard stones below. He had to make that leap unless he just had to, but he was leaving an avenue open if his other measures didn't work. Again he ran to the bureau and drew out a large bag of gunpowder, weighing at least five pounds. In the open end of this he inserted a fuse, and tied the neck around it. While he was doing this he heard shouts and cheers as the soldiers returned to the door, picked up their ram, and hurled into a thick planking. He did not bother shooting again, but instead lit the fuse with a candle. Then he walked to the large door, pushed out the small dog's door, and tossed the bag through it. He jumped back and ran, though there was little chance that the resultant explosion would harm the door. There was a silence as the soldiers were probably staring paralyzed at the smoking fuse. Then a roar. The door shook, the door fell in, blasted off its hinges, and black smoke poured in. Green ran into the cloud, got down on all fours, scuttled through the doorway, cursed desperately when the hilt of his sword caught on the door frame, tore loose, and lunged through into the dense smoke that filled the anti-room. His groping hands felt the ram where it had dropped, and the wet, warm face of a dog. He coughed sharply from the biting fumes, but went on until his head butted into the wall. Then he felt to his right, where he imagined the door was, came to it, passed through, and on into the next room, also filled with a cloud. After he'd scuttled like a bug across its floor, he dared to open his eyes for a quick look.  There was no feet in the clearer area between the floor and the bottom of the clouds, so he rose and walked through the door. To his left he knew the hall led to a stairway that was probably now jammed with soldiers. To his right would be another stairway that went up to the Duke's apartments. That was the only way he could go. Luckily the smoke was still so dense in the corridor that those assembled on the floor he was in the Duchess's rooms yet, and he hoped that when they did rush it and didn't find him there, the rolled back carpets would give them the idea that he'd taken a running broad jump from the balcony. In which case they'd at once searched the moat for him, and if they didn't find him swimming there, as they wouldn't, then they might presume he'd either drowned or else got to the shore and was now somewhere in along the wall toward the staircase, his other hand gripping the stiletto. When his fingers ran across the arm of a man leaning against the wall he withdrew them at once, bent his knees and in a crouching position ran in the general direction of the stairs. The smoke got even thinner here so that he saw the steps in time to avoid falling over them. Unfortunately the Duke and another man were also purged into the torchlight from the clouds, but he had the advantage of knowing who he was so that he had plunged the thin stiletto into the soldier's throat before he could act. The Duke tried to leap past Green, but the earthman stuck a leg out and tripped him. Then he grabbed the ruler's arm, twisted it behind his back, forced him up and on his knees, and using the arm as a cruel lever raised him. He enjoyed hearing the Duke alone, though he'd never consciously take pleasure in pain before. He had time to think that perhaps he liked this because of the torch the Duke had inflicted on as many helpless victims. Of course he, Green, a highly civilized man, shouldn't be feeling this way. But the rightness or wrongness of an emotion never kept anybody from experiencing it. "'Up you go,' he said in a low harsh voice, directing the Duke toward his apartments, manipulating the twisted arm as a steering column. By then the smoke had cleared away so that those at the other end of the corridor could see that something was wrong. A shout arose followed by the slap of running feet on the stone flags.  At night he stuck the end of the stiletto into the Duke's back and pressed hard enough to draw blood. The Duke quivered, then became rigid. Nevertheless he said, "'I will not do so. That would be dishonor.' Green couldn't help admiring such courage, even if it did make his predicament worse.  So he stuck the stiletto in his teeth and still holding with one hand to the Duke's twisted arm took the Duke's pistol from his belt and fired over his shoulder. There was a whoosh of flame that burned the Duke's ear and made him give a cry that was almost drowned out in the roar of the explosion. The nearest man threw up his hands, dropped his spear and fell on his face. The others stopped. Doubtless they were still operating under the Duchess's orders not to kill Green, for the Duke must have arrived at the foot of the staircase just in time to witness the explosion of the gunpowder. And he was in no condition to issue contrary orders, being deafened and stunned by the report almost going off in his ear.  It is his wish that you go back to the stairs and do not bother us until he sends word to you.'" The flickering light of the torches he could see the puzzled expression on the soldier's faces. It was only then he realized that in his extreme excitement he had shouted the orders in English. Hastily he translated his demands and was relieved to see them turn and retreat, though reluctantly. He then half dragged the Duke up the steps to his apartments where he barred the door and primed his pistol again. "'You are so good,' he said in English. The question is, what now, little man?' The ruler's rooms were even more luxurious than his wife's and were larger because they had to contain not only the Duke's hundreds of hunting trophies, including human heads, but his collection of glass birds. Indeed, one might easily see where his heart really lay, for the heads had collected dust, whereas each and every glittering-winged creature was immaculate. It would have gone hard on a servant who neglected his cleaning duties in the great rooms dedicated to the collection. On seeing them, Greene smiled slightly. When you're fighting for your life, hit a man where he softest. It was a matter of two minutes to tie the Duke in a chair with several of the hunting whips hanging from the walls. Meanwhile the Duke came out of his days. He began screaming every invective he knew, and he knew quite a lot, and promising every refined torture he could think of, and his knowledge was not poverty-stricken in that area, either. Greene waited until the Duke had given himself a bad case of laryngitis. Then he told him, in a firm but quiet voice, what he intended to do unless the Duke got him out of the castle. To emphasize his determination he picked up a bludgeon studded with iron spikes and swung at whistling through the air. The Duke's eyes widened and he paled. All of a sudden he changed from a defiant ruler challenging his captor to inflict his worst upon him to a shrunken, trembling old man.    So I know where the unique exorader statuette made by Eisen-Yushua of Metzvah-Mush is hidden, the glass bird that cost the whole Dukedom a great tax and brought many bitter tears and hardships from your subjects. I will have no compunction about destroying it, even if it's the only one ever made and if Eisen-Yushua is now dead so that it can never be replaced. The Duke's eyes bulged in horror. No! No! he said in a quavering voice, that would be unthinkable, blasphemous, sacrilegious. Have you no sense of beauty, degenerate slave that you are, that you would smash forever that most beautiful all things made by the hands of man? I would. The Duke's mouth drew down at the corners. Suddenly he was weeping. Green was embarrassed for he knew how great must be the emotion that could make this man educated in a hard school break down before an enemy.  Here was a man who would literally allow his throat to be cut before he would display cowardice by bargaining for it, but to have his precious collection of glass birds threatened. Green shrugged. Why try to understand it? The only thing to do was to use whatever came his way. Very well. If you wish to save them, you must do this. And he detailed exactly the Duke's moves and orders for the next minutes. He thereupon made him swear by the most holy oaths and upon his family's name and by the honor of the founder of his family that he would not betray Green. To make sure, added the Earthmen, I shall take the Exorotter with me. Once I know your word is good I'll take steps to see that it has returned undamaged to you. Can't I depend on that?  Yes, I will contact Zingaro, business agent of the Thieves Guild, and he will return it to you for a compensation, of course. But before we conclude this bargain you must swear that you will not harm Amra, my wife, nor any of her children, nor confiscate her business, but will behave toward her as if this had never happened. The Duke swallowed hard, but he swore. Green was happy because though he was going to desert Amra he was at least insuring her future.  Even though the Duke had sworn the holiest of oaths he was as treacherous as any of the barbarians on this planet and that was very treacherous indeed. Green had stood behind the door, sweating and yelling to the loud and sometimes incoherent conversation taking place between the Duke, his soldiers and the Duchess. The Duke was a good actor, for he convinced everybody that he had escaped from the mad slave Green, had seized a sword and forced him to make a running broad jump from the balcony railing. Of course several guardsmen had seen a large, man-sized object hurdle from the balcony and fall with a loud splash into the moat below. That the slave must have broken his back when he struck the water or else he had been knocked out and then drowned. Whatever had happened he had not come out. Green, his ear against the door, could not help smiling at this despite the tension. He and the Duke had combined forces to heave out a wooden statue of the god Zusu-Patter waited with iron dishes tied to it so that it wouldn't float. In the moonlight and the excitement the idol must have looked enough like a falling man to deceive anybody. The only one seemingly not satisfied was Zuni. She raised every kind of hell she knew, behaved in a most undignified manner, screeched at her husband because his blood thirstiness and lack of restraint had robbed her of the exquisite torture she had planned for the slave who had attempted to dishonor her.  To show that he met what he said he ordered several soldiers to escort her.  She raved on until the Duke gave a sign and two soldiers seized her elbows at least Green supposed they did for she yelled at them to take their dirty hands off her and propelled her out of the rooms. Even then it took some time before the Duke could close the doors on his last guest. The little router opened the door. In his hand he held a priest's green robe, the sacerdotal, hexagonal spectacles, and a mask for the lower part of the face. The mask was customarily worn when a monk was on a missionary territory. During the time the face was covered, the monk was under a vow not to speak to anyone until he had reached the person for whom he had a message. Thus Green would not be bothered with any embarrassing questions. He put on the robe, spectacles, and mask, threw the hood over his head and placed the glass exorotter inside his shirt. His loaded pistol he kept up one capacious sleeve, holding it with the other hand. "'Remember,' said the Duke anxiously as he opened the door and peered out to see if anybody was on the staircase, "'Remember that you must take every precaution against damaging the exorotter,' tells Zingaro that he must at once pack it in a chest filled with silks and sawdust so it won't break.   He promised again that he would keep his word as well as the Duke kept his, but that he would also take every measure to ensure against treachery. Then he slipped out and closed the door. He was on his own until he boarded the Bird of Fortune. End of chapter 7 through 9.


So euphoria episode 4 had a lot going on in it and in this video rather than just breaking down one character we're going to be looking at probably about three or four different characters and explain what's going on in their story arcs and see what we can learn from it. What is up everybody this is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and if you're new to my channel typically what i do is i pull different topics from the youtube community but i like to pull topics from movies tv shows pop culture in general try to see what lessons we can pull from them to improve our own mental and emotional well-being so if you're into that stuff make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell and make sure you check out my euphoria playlist i've been covering all the episodes but yeah before we get started in case you did not know i have my brand new book Rewire Your Anxiety out now and a bunch of people are giving me feedback on it and it makes me feel oh so good but anyways it's available in both ebook and audiobook format so if you want to check that out it's down in the description down in the pinned comment below all right so yeah euphoria episode four there's a lot going on um and obviously each episode kind of like really centers around one character but we kind of see what's going on with other characters so in this episode it really focused on jewels and it kind of gave um a little bit of her backstory and everything like that i'm not going to be diving too much into her going into a psychiatric hospital as a child but if that's something that you want me to kind of do a whole video on um and children going to psychiatric hospitals um when it comes to you know self harm or even what might have been you know her being put in there for you know gender dysphoria or whatever it is like if you want me to make a video on that let me know down in the comments below all right but i want to be talking about a few different characters so let's talk about rue all right played by zendaya which is really interesting because i just took my son to go see uh spider man far from home i act like i took my son like i did it freaking love it love that movie was so interesting just seeing like zendaya as mary jane blotson and then zendaya as rue you know what i mean but anyways i've done a lot of video breakdowns on rue because she struggles with addiction those of you who don't know me i'm a recovering drug addict and alcoholic with over seven years clean and sober but yeah this episode it didn't focus too much on rue all right like there was like the quick little scene where she met with uh auli after she called him at the end of the last episode and like i'm telling you guys right now i'm telling you guys right now like their relationship this kind of sponsor-sponsor relationship is going to be legit all right like i love auli because he's the type of sponsor who i would want one who is just no nonsense get straight to the point like don't be like beating around the bush let's talk about the problem focus on the solutions you know what i mean so make sure you're paying attention to that but anyways i want to talk about rue and her relationship with her little sister gia because in this episode obviously like rue um you know took gia to the carnival and which is which is good so for rue this is good because it means her mother is trusting her more like when i first got clean and sober like i wasn't trusted for a very long time like even after i had almost a year and a half clean a year and a half clean my son's mother was still reluctant to let me watch him by myself all right so seeing the trust that's being rebuilt with um rue and her mom letting her you know take care of a little sister like that's cool so make sure you pay attention to that because that's something that helps encourage people's recovery but what we see later is that you know gia smokes pot with these dudes right and there's a few ways to look at this all right a few different ways like one of them is this is a kid just trying out some pot that's cool pot i have nothing against it is legal here in nevada i help vote for it whatever do your thing boo but something to pay attention to and this is something that we need to pay attention to in our real lives as well is modeling behaviors right but also gia went through like a traumatic experience seeing her sister overdosed all right like that will mess a child up like um those of you who don't know i worked in addiction treatment for a little over three years as well and there are many people who came in there were like their children right or their family um their friends found them overdosed and had to call the you know paramedics or whatever and it can be traumatizing and this is how addiction kind of has this ripple effect right because we affect other people than they try to self-medicate so like when i saw that gia was like you know messing around with weed like it has me concerned because she might start abusing substances as a way to handle her own problems as well so in ru's case like this is a tricky situation and something again i could do a whole another video on and i might if this kind of progresses into something else but anyways like ru this gives her even more motivation to stay sober and stay on the right track because her little sister might be modeling her behavior or whenever ru puts her through a traumatic traumatic experience then gia might want to turn to substances and that can turn out bad and then this poor mother is going to have two not one but two children who are abusing substances so next let's talk about cat so in the last episode it focused mainly around cat and what we know about cat is that she you know obviously struggles with some insecurities and everything like that so in this episode you know she goes to the carnival and there's that boy that she was kind of flirting with in class and then you know they were hanging out at the carnival and you know she clearly has a thing for him right but anyways you know she says hey i'm gonna go get us some you know drinks or whatever and then she comes back and she sees him talking to another girl so i've done videos in the past about like youtubers um you know who have been cheated on and everything like that like this is what i'm talking about like what you just saw with cat and obviously cat is not dating this guy but a lot of people do things right especially in relationships that are based on insecurities okay like something i i try to teach everybody is if you've been cheated on it is not because of you it is because of them and their own insecurities and you see how trivial this can be and especially in high school like it can be really trivial but this is something i see grown adults do hell this is something that i struggled with way into my 20s and my insecurities right so cat sees him talking to this girl and then when we hear the conversation this girl worked with his sister and she has a boyfriend and that's why they were talking but cat just seeing that she got jealous and she went and hooked up with that other guy all right and like as i'm watching this i'm like oh no no no girl no girl like go like walk up you know whatever it is right because we're never going to have healthy relationships if we constantly think that you know the guy we're seeing or the girl we're seeing whoever it is might be flirting or talking with other people like one of the things i love about my beautiful girlfriend Tristan is like she's one of the first women i've dated where like jealousy isn't this like huge thing right but i've done things to earn her trust and one of them is being clean and sober not being a scumbag anymore you know what i'm saying but i want you all to like really look at yourself and look like do you do this do you do this thing because sometimes it's not even you know seeing that person talking to another person sometimes it's just oh this person isn't giving me the love or affection or attention that i feel that i deserve that i feel that i need then you run off and you start talking to somebody else to get that attention that you need so i think as we you know see the season go on we're going to see more of what cat does based on her insecurities so if you're somebody who struggles with insecurities i recommend that you pay attention to cat because we're going to see how it causes problems in her life next let's talk about cassie played by sydney sweeney so this episode she ends up going to the carnival with mckay the dude she's seeing and in the last episode you like she went you know to his frat party and everything like that and yeah they like said they loved each other right and my teenage love like all right that's that's another whole another video all right but anyways um and i i'm just not thinking of this but she she gets upset with mckay because he he tells you know his boy that like they're just chilling right he doesn't say like they're dating this is my girlfriend or anything like that and in mckay's mind like he's doing the right thing because he's protecting her right he's protecting her because his friends they think you know not great things about her because of her past there was a video that we saw in the very first episode and everything like that but what i was just thinking about too is because like i don't recommend that you hang out with people or date people who are won't like tell their friends that you guys are dating like that's not cool like that is going to turn into a mess but mckay had no problem bringing her to the frat party so it seems like he just you know he has some like hesitancy for people who know about her past all right and that's something that we really need to think about like this is one of the reasons why it's so important to take things slow right like so many people want to toss out the i love yous and you know some people like you know these are high school students that were watching but some people you know they're moving in together or some people running off and getting married like like it's not just about like taking your time for the sake of taking your time like one of the reasons you take time with relationships before they get super duper serious right you don't let your emotional brain run things and use some of your logical brain is because you haven't been through enough situations together to know if this is the relationship right or if everything is honky dory like we all focus on the honeymoon phase but like we need to like realize like it's important to know how things are going to go when things aren't great like how do you handle fights how do you handle arguments how do you guys handle each other's friends how do you handle each other's family members and all these other things all right so this is one of the reasons why it might be good like even if you feel right even if you feel like you love that person like tone it down just a little bit wait a little bit longer until you're in more situations to say okay is this thing going to work and obviously like what we're seeing like this is a theme throughout the show throughout this episode is that you see people making bad decisions based on their emotions this is one of the reasons why I advocate that we need to focus on our mental health our emotions drive us to do things that we end up regretting right so Cassie in this situation getting upset she ends up getting high she takes the Molly she goes on the carousel and we all know what happened there right and that's going to be interesting too because I can see Cassie trying to change who she is get into this serious relationship with McCabe but she might be struggling from you know that phase she was in you know hooking up and everything like that and when she was on the carousel and you saw everybody see this right that might hurt her confidence and wondering if she can change and here's the advice I have for all of you like when we're trying to become that person we want to become there's going to be setbacks we're going to screw up we're going to have these roadblocks we're going to have these speed bumps whatever it is right but do not let that stop you from moving forward okay we're all going to make mistakes we are all flawed human beings okay the most we can do is learn from them and try to grow moving forward all right so the last thing we'll talk about is jewels okay so this episode had a lot to do with jewels but I just want to kind of focus on you know the ending where she finally found out that Tyler is actually Nate all right and this this was weird like just like purely opinion not like you know what can we learn from this thing like I don't know it was it was just weird like that that whole scene was weird it felt like it escalated very quickly and everything like that and you know obviously like Nate has a thing for jewels but you know he starts threatening her but like even though that's weird like this is something I could see really happening okay like Nate is the type of person who we've seen you know get physical with people but like he is also somebody who will use emotional abuse emotional manipulation right and that's what he was doing to jewels in that situation so we see this a lot just in shows you know with blackmail and you know things like that but Nate is somebody who does not have his own stuff in check like we saw that in episode what was it episode two where like this dude has some issues and he has daddy issues he has all sorts of issues so if if you start seeing signs like this in a dude might not be a good idea to date him it's not just dudes either because I have my share of dating women who are not all there right so like this is something we all need to watch out for here's something that I think is really good about this show though okay like it's it's good but like in the show we're seeing like it's obviously bad where they talk about sending these lewd photos to one another because I think I mentioned it in my first review of this show maybe um like a lot of people do not real realize this like even like like a lot of people said they're minors watching this show right like I hope you guys are learning like this isn't fantasy like you can get in trouble you can go on an offender list okay for sending photos and for distributing photos okay like I hope everybody realizes this like listen if you're of age and you want to send nudes do your thing okay but I really hope teenagers watching this show are understanding that there can be consequences for this I mentioned in the first review of this show that I did that I know of somebody right who was 18 and shared a photo of a 17 year old and he ended up getting in a lot of trouble legally for that all right so make sure that like you are learning from this like this is very very real and obviously the laws are different in uh in different states and everything like that but like it's better to be safe than sorry okay but anyways again let me know down in the comments below if there are certain topics maybe that I brought up in this that you want me to dive deeper into this the first time where the video is a little bit longer but I focused on a few different characters rather than just one so help me help you let me know what you like what you don't like let me know if you want me to break down um more topics whatever it is just help guide me as I review this beautiful show euphoria all right and don't forget check out the description and the pin comment down below because my brand new book we while your anxiety is out now an ebook and audiobook format all right anyways that's all I got for this video if you like this video please give it a thumbs up if you're new makes you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos and a huge huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on patreon you are all amazing and if you would like to become a patron support what I'm doing here you can also get access to my books full free you can click a tap right there all right thanks again so much for watching I'll see you next time