Chapter 28 and 29 of a comic history of the United States. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. This reading by Allison Hester of Athens, Georgia. A Comic History of the United States by Bill Nye. Chapter 28. Last Year of the Disagreeable War. General Grant was now in command of all the Union troops, and in 1864-65, the plan of operation was to prevent the Junction of the Confederates. General Grant seeking to interest the Army in Virginia under General Lee, and General Sherman the Army of General Joseph E. Johnston in Georgia. Sherman started at once and came upon Johnston, located on almost impregnable hills all the way to Atlanta. The battles of Dalton, Rassaka, Dallas, Lost Mountain, and Kennesaw Mountain preceded Johnston's retreat to the entrenchments of Atlanta July 10th, Sherman having been on the move since early May 1864. Jefferson Davis, disgusted with Johnston, placed hood in command, who made three heroic attacks upon the Union troops, but was repulsed. Sherman now gathered fifteen days rations from the neighbors, and throwing his forces across Hood's line of supplies, compelled him to evacuate the city. The historian says that Sherman was entirely supplied from Nashville via railroad during this trip, but the author knows of his own personal knowledge that there were times when he got fresh provisions along the road. This expedition cost the Union Army thirty thousand men, and the Confederates thirty-five thousand. Besides, Georgia was the Confederacy, so far as arms, grain, etc. were concerned. Sherman attributed much of his success to the fact that he could repair and operate the railroad so rapidly. Among his men were Yankee machinists and engineers, who were as necessary as courageous fighters. We are held here during many priceless hours, said the general, because the enemy has spoiled this passenger engine. Who knows anything about repairing an engine? I do, said a dusty tramp in blue. I can repair this one in an hour. What makes you think so? Well, I made it. This was one of the strong features of Sherman's army. Among the hundred thousand who composed it, there were so many active brains and skilled hands that the toot of the engine caught the heels of the last echoing shout of the battle. Learning that Hood proposed to invade Tennessee, Sherman prepared to march across Georgia to the sea and, if necessary, to tramp through the Atlantic states. Hood was sorry afterwards that he invaded Tennessee. He shut Thomas up in Nashville after a battle with Schofield and kept the former indoors for two weeks, when all of a sudden, Thomas exclaimed, Air, air, give me air, and came out throwing Hood into headlong flight when the Union Calvary fell on his rear, followed by the infantry, and the forty thousand Confederates became a scattered and discouraged mob spread out over several counties. The burning of Atlanta preceded Sherman's march, and though one of the saddest features of the war was believed to be a military necessity, those who declare war hoping to have a summer's outing thereby may live to regret it for many bitter years. On November 16th, Sherman started, his army moving in four columns, constituting altogether a column of fire by night and a pillar of cloud and dust by day.  In five weeks, Sherman had marched three hundred miles, had destroyed two railroads, had stormed Fort McAllister, and had captured Savannah. On the fifth and sixth of May, 1864, occurred the Battle of the Wilderness near the old battleground of Chancellor'sville. No one could describe it, for it was fault in the dense woods and the two days of useless butchery with not the slightest signs of civilized warfare sickened both armies, and with no victory for either, they retired to their entrenchments. Grant, instead of retreating, however, quietly passed the flank of the Confederates and started for Spotsylvania Courthouse, where a battle occurred May 8th through the 12th. After the two armies fought, five days without any advantage to either. It was at this time that Grant sent his celebrated dispatch, stating that he, quote, proposed to fight it out on this line if it took all summer, end quote. Finally, he sought to turn Lee's right flank. June 8th, the Battle of Cold Harbor followed this movement. The Union forces were shot down in the mire and brush by Lee's troops, now snugly in out of the wet, behind the Cold Harbor defenses. One historian says that in twenty minutes, ten thousand Yankee troops were killed, though Badoe, whose accuracy in counting dead has always been perfectly marvelous, admits only seven thousand in all. Grant now turned his attention towards Petersburg, but Lee was there before him, and in trenched, so the Union army had to entrench. This only postponed the evil day, however. Things now shaped themselves into a siege of Richmond, with Petersburg as the first outpost of the besieged capital. On the thirtieth of July, eight thousand pounds of powder were carefully inserted under a Confederate fort, and the entire thing hoisted in the air, leaving a huge hole in which a few hours afterwards, many a boy in blue met his death. For in the assault, which followed the explosion, the Union soldiers were mowed down by the concentrated fire of the Confederates. The Federals threw away four thousand lives here. On the eighteenth of August, the Weldon Railroad was captured, which was a great advantage to Grant, and, though several efforts were made to recapture it, they were unsuccessful. General Early was delegated to threaten Washington and scare the able officers of the army who were stopping there at that time talking politics and abusing Grant. He defeated General Wallace at Monocacy River and appeared before Fort Stevens, one of the defenses of Washington, July 11th. Had he whooped right along instead of pausing a day somewhere to get laundry work done before entering Washington, he would easily have captured the city. The Confederates, however, got there ahead of him, and he had to go back. He sent a force of Calvary into Pennsylvania where they captured Chambersburg and burned it on failure of the town trustees to pay five hundred thousand dollars ransom. General Sheridan was placed in charge of the troops here and defeated Early at Winchester, riding twenty miles in twenty minutes, as per poem. At Fisher's Hill he was also victorious. He devastated the Valley of Shenandoah to such a degree that a crow passing the entire length of the valley had to carry his dinner with him. It was, however, at the battle of Cedar Creek that Sheridan was twenty miles away, according to historical prose. Why he was twenty miles away, various and conflicting reasons are given, but on his good horse, Renzi, he arrived in time to turn and defeat and rout into victory and hilarity. Renzi, after the war, died in eleven states. He was a black horse with a saddle gall and a flashing eye. He passed away at his home in Chicago at last in poverty while waiting for a pension applied for on the grounds of founder and lampers brought on by eating too heartily after the battle, and while warm but in the line of duty. The Red River Campaign under General Banks was a joint naval and land expedition, resulting in the capture of Fort De Russi, March 14, after which, April 8, the troops marching toward Shreveport in very open order, single file, or holding one another's hands and singing John Brown's body, were attacked by General Dick Taylor, and if Washington had not been so far away and through a hostile country, Bull Run would have had another rival. But the boys rallied, and next day repulsed the Confederates, after which they returned to New Orleans where board was more reasonable. General Banks obtained quite a relief at this time. He was relieved of his command. On August 5th, Commodore Thirigut captured Mobile after a neat and attractive naval fight, and on the 24th and 25th of December, Commodore Porter and General Butler started out to take Fort Fisher. After two days bombardment, Butler decided that there were other forts to be had on better terms and returned. Afterwards, General Terry commanded the second expedition, Porter having remained on hand with his vessel to assist. January 15, 1865, the most heroic fighting on both sides resulted, and at last, completely hemmed in, the brave and battered garrisons surrendered, but no one who was there need blush to say so, even today. At the south at this time, coffee was fifty dollars a pound, and gloves were one hundred and fifty dollars a pair. Flower was forty dollars a barrel, but you could get a barrel of currency for less than that. Money was plenty, but what was needed seemed to be confidence. Running the blockade was not profitable at that time, since over fifteen hundred head of Confederate vessels were captured during the war. The capture of Fort Fisher closed the last port of the south, and left the Confederacy no show with foreign powers or markets. The Alabama was an armed steamship, and the most unpleasant feature of the war to the federal government, especially as she had more sympathy and aid in England than was asked for or expected by the Unionists. However, England has since repaid all this loss in various ways. She has put from five to eight million dollars into cattle on the plains of the northwest, where the skeletons of same may be found bleaching in the summer sun, and I am personally acquainted with six Americans now visiting England who can borrow enough in a year to make up all the losses sustained through the Alabama and other neutral vessels. Captain Sims commanded the Alabama, and off Shearburg he sent a challenge to the Curesarge commanded by Captain Winslow, who accepted it, and so worked his vessel that the Alabama had to move round him in a circle, while he filled her up with iron, lead, copper, tin, German silver, glass, nails, putty, paint, varnishes, and dye stuff. At the seventh rotation, the Alabama ran up the white flag and sunk with a low mellow plunk. The crew was rescued by Captain Winslow, and the English yacht, Dearhound, the latter taking Sims and starting for England. This matter, however, was settled in after years. The care of the sick, the dying, and the dead in the Union armies was almost entirely under the eye of the merciful and charitable, loyal and loving members of the Sanitary and Christian Commissions, whose work and its memory kept green in the hearts of the survivors and their children will be monument enough for the coming centuries. In July 1864, the debt of the country was $2 billion and $0.20. $2.90 in greenbacks would buy a reluctant gold dollar. Still, Abraham Lincoln was re-elected against George B. McClellan, the Democratic candidate, who carried only three states. This was endorsement enough for the policy of President Lincoln. Sherman's army of 60,000, after a month's rest at Savannah, started north to unite with Grant in the final blow, quote, before it was terror, behind it ashes, end quote. Columbia was captured February 17th and burned without Sherman's authority the night following. Charleston was evacuated the next day. Johnston was recalled to take command and opposed the march of Sherman, but was driven back after fierce engagements at Bentonville and Avery's borough. On March 25th, Lee decided to attack Grant and, while the latter was busy, get out of Richmond and join Johnston. But when this battle, known as the attack on Fort Steadman, was over, Grant's hold was tighter than ever. Sheridan attacked Lee's rear with a heavy force, and at five forks, April 1st, the surprised garrison was defeated with 5,000 captured. The next day, the entire Union army advanced, and the line of Confederate entrenchments was broken. On the following day, Petersburg and Richmond were evacuated, but Mr. Davis was not there. He had gone away. Rather than meet General Grant and entertain him when there was no pie in the house, he and the Treasury had escaped from the haunts of man wishing to commune with nature for a while. He was captured at Irwinsville, Georgia, under peculiar and rather amusing circumstances. He was never punished, with the exception, perhaps, that he published a book and did not realize anything from it. Lee fled to the westward, but was pursued by the triumphant Federals, especially by Sheridan, whose calvary hung on his flanks day and night. Food failed the fleeing foe, and the young shoots of trees for food, and the larger shoots of artillery between meals were too much for that proud army, so once so strong and confident. Let us not dwell on the particulars. As Sheridan planted his calvary squarely across Lee's path of retreat, the worn but heroic tatters of a proud army prepared to sell themselves for a bloody ransom in go-down fighting. But Grant had demanded their surrender, and, seeing back of the galling, skirmishing calvary solid walls of confident infantry, the terms of surrender were accepted by General Lee, and, April 9th, the Confederate army stacked its arms near Appomattox Courthouse. The Confederate war debt was never paid, for some reason or other, but the federal debt, when it was feeling the best, amounted to $2,844 million dollars. One million men lost their lives. Was it worthwhile? In the midst of the general rejoicing, President Lincoln was assassinated by John Wilkes Booth at Ford's Theater, April 14th. The assassin was captured in a dying condition in a burning barn through a crack in the boarding of which he had been shot by a soldier named Boston Corbett. He died with no sympathetic applause to soothe the dull, cold ear of death. West Virginia was admitted to the Union in 1863 and Nevada in 1864. The following chapters will be devoted to more peaceful details, while we cheerfully close the sorrowful pages in which we have confessed that, with all our greatness as a nation, we could not stay the tide of war. Chapter 29 Too much liberty in places and not enough elsewhere. Thoughts on the late war. Who is the bigger ass, the man who will not forgive and forget, or the mawkish and moist eyed sniveller who wants to do that all the time? When Patrick Henry put his old cast-iron spectacles on the top of his head and whooped for him, he did not know that someday we should have more of it than we know what to do with. He little dreamed that the time would come when we should have more liberty than we could pay for. When Mr. Henry sawed the air and shouted for liberty or death, I do not believe that he knew the time would come when liberty would stand on Bedlow's Island and yearn for rest and change of scene. It seems to me that we have too much liberty in this country in some ways. We have more liberty than we have money. We guarantee that every man in America shall fill himself up of liberty at our expense. And the less of an American he is, the more liberty he can have. Should he desire to enjoy himself? All he needs is a slight foreign accent and a willingness to mix up with politics as soon as he can get his baggage off the steamer. The more I study American institutions, the more I regret that I was not born a foreigner so that I could have something to say about the management of our great land. If I could not be a foreigner, I believe I should prefer to be a policeman or an Indian not taxed. I am often led to ask, in the language of the poet, is civilization a failure and is the Caucasian played out? Almost everyone can have a good deal of fun in America except the American. He seems to be so busy paying his taxes that he has very little time to vote or to mingle in society's giddy whirl or to mix up with the nobility. That is the reason why the alien who rides across the United States in the limited mail and writes a book about us before breakfast wonders why we are always in a hurry. That also is the reason why we have to throw our meals into ourselves with such dispatch and hardly have time to maintain a warm personal friendship with our families. We do not care much for wealth, but we must have freedom and freedom costs money. We have advertised to furnish a bunch of freedom to every man, woman and child who comes to our shores and we are going to deliver the goods whether we have any left for ourselves or not. What would the great world beyond the seas say to us if some day the blue-eyed Oriental with his heart full of love for our female seminaries and our old women's homes should land upon our coasts and crave freedom and carload lots but find that we were using all the liberty ourselves? But what do we want of liberty anyhow? What could we do with it if we had it? It takes a man of leisure to enjoy liberty and we have no leisure whatever. It is a good thing to keep in the house for the use of guests but we don't need it for ourselves. Therefore, we have a statue of liberty enlightening the world because it shows that we keep liberty on tap winter and summer. We want the whole broad world to remember that when it gets tired of oppression it can come here to America and oppress us. We are used to it and we rather like it. If we don't like it we can get on the steamer and go abroad where we may visit the I-feet monarchies and have a high old time. The sight of the goddess of liberty standing there in New York Harbor night and day bathing her feet in the rippling sea is a good thing. It is first rate. It may also be productive of good in a direction that many have not thought of. As she stands there day after day bathing her feet in the broad Atlantic, perhaps some moss-grown alien landing on our shore and moving toward the far west may fix the bright picture in his so-called mind and remembering how, on his arrival in New York, he saw liberty bathing her feet with impunity he may be led in after years to try it on himself. We're citizens and less voters will someday be adopted as the motto of the Republic. One reference to the late war and I will close. I want to refer especially to the chronic reconciler who, when war was declared, was not involved in it, but who now improves every opportunity, especially near election time, to get out a tired olive branch and make a tableau of himself. He is worse than the man who cannot forgive or forget. The growth of reconciliation between the north and the south is the slow growth of years and the work of generations. When any man, north or south, in a public place, takes occasion to talk in a mellow and malchish way of the great love he now has for his old enemy, watch him. He is getting ready to ask a favor. Here is a beautiful poetic idea in the reunion of two contending and shattered elements of a great nation. There is something beautifully pathetic in the picture of the north and south clasped in each other's arms and shedding a torrent of hot tears down each other's backs as it is done in a play. But do you believe that the aged mothers on either side have learned to love the foe with much violence yet? Do you believe that the crippled veteran north or south now passionately loves the adversary who robbed him of his glorious youth, made him a feeble ruin, and mowed down his comrades with swift death? Do you believe that either warrior is so fickle that he has entirely deserted the calls for which he fought? Even the victor cannot ask that. Let the gentle finger of time undo, so far as may be the devastation wrought by the war, and let succeeding generations seek through natural methods to reunite the business and the traffic that were interrupted by the war. Let the south guarantee to the northern investor security to himself and his investment, and he will not ask for the love which we read of in speeches, but do not expect and do not find in the south. Two warring parents on the verge of divorce have been saved the disgrace of separation and agreed to maintain their household for the sake of their children. Their love has been questioned by the world and their relations strained. Is it not bad taste for them to pose in public and make a cheap Romeo and Juliet tableau of themselves? Let time and merciful silence obliterate the scars of war and succeeding generations, fostered by the smiles of national prosperity, soften the bitterness of the past, and mellow the memory of a mighty struggle in which each contending host called upon Almighty God to sustain the calls which it honestly believed to be just. Let us be contented during this generation with the assurance that geographically the union has been preserved and that each contending warrior has once more taken up the peaceful struggle for bettering and beautifying the home so bravely fought for. End of chapter 29. Chapters 30 and 31 of a comic history of the United States. This is a LibriVox recording, all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. This reading by Allison Hester of Athens, Georgia. Comic History of the United States. By Bill Nye. Chapter 30. Reconstruction Without Pain. Administrations of Johnson and Grant. It was feared that the return of a million federal soldiers to their homes after the four years of war would make serious trouble in the north. But they were very shortly adjusted to their new lives and attending to the duties which peace imposed upon them. The war of the rebellion was disastrous to nearly every branch of trade, but those who remained at home to write the war songs of the north did well. Some of these efforts were worthy and buoyed up by a general feeling of robust patriotism. They floated on to success, but few have stood the test of years and monotonous peace. The author of, Mother I Am Hollow to the Ground is just depositing his profits from its sale in the picture given on the next page. The second one, wearing the cape overcoat tragedy ear, wrote, Who will be my laundress now? Andrew Johnson succeeded to Mr. Lincoln's seat, having acted before as his vice. A great review of the army, lasting twelve hours, was arranged to take place in Washington, consisting of the armies of Grant and Sherman. It was reviewed by the president and cabinet. It extended over thirty miles, twenty men deep, and constituted about one-fifth of the northern army at the time peace was declared. Grant Johnson recognized the state governments existing in Virginia, Tennessee, Arkansas, and Louisiana, but instituted provisional governments for the other states of the defeated Confederacy, as it seemed impossible otherwise to bring order out of the chaos which war and financial distress had brought about. He authorized the assembly also of loyal conventions to elect state and other officers and pardoned by proclamation everybody, with the exception of a certain class of the late insurgents whom he pardoned personally. On Christmas Day, 1868, a universal amnesty was declared. The Thirteenth Amendment, abolishing slavery, became a part of the Constitution, December 18, 1865, and the former masters found themselves still morally responsible for these colored people without the right to control them or even the money with which to employ them. The annual interest on the national debt at this time amounted to one hundred and fifty million dollars, yet the treasury paid this together with the expenses of government and reduced the debt seventy-one million dollars before the volunteer army had been fully discharged in 1866. Congress met on such recuperative power as that is unnecessary for the generation that fights a four-year war costing over two billions of dollars generally leaves the debt for another generation or another century to pay. Congress met finally, ignored the president's rollicking welcome to the succeeded states, and over his veto proceeded to pass various laws regarding their admission, such as the civil rights and freedman's bureau bills. Tennessee returned promptly to the Union under the Constitutional Amendments, but the others did not till the nightmare of Reconstruction had been added to the horrors of war. In 1868, after much time worse than wasted in carpet bag government and a mob reign in the South, which imperiled her welfare for many years after it was over, by frightening investors and settlers long after peace had been restored, representatives began to come into Congress under the laws. During this same year, the hostilities between Congress and the president culminated in an effort to impeach the latter. He escaped by one vote. It is very likely that the assassination of Lincoln was the most unfortunate thing that happened to the Southern states. While he was not a warrior, he was a statesman, and no gentler hand or more willing brain could have entered with enthusiasm into the adjustment of chaotic conditions than his. The 14th Amendment, a bright little bon-mote, became a law June 28, 1868, and was written in the minutes of Congress so that people could go there and refresh their memories regarding it. It guaranteed civil rights to all, regardless of race, color, odor, wildness, or willingness whatsoever, and allowed all noses to be counted in congressional representations no matter what angle they may be at or what color they may be. Some American citizens murmur at taxation without representation, but the Negro murmurs at representation without remuneration. The Athenian excitement of 1866 died out without much loss of life. In October 1867, Alaska was purchased from Russia for $7,200,000. The ice crop, since then, would more than pay for the place, and it has also a water power and cranberry marsh on it. The rule of the imperialists in France prompted the appointment of Maximilian, Archduke of Austria, as Emperor of Mexico, supported by the French Army. The Americans, still sore and in debt at the heels of their own war, pitied the helpless Mexicans, and, acting on the principles enunciated in the Monroe Doctrine, demanded the recall of Maximilian, who, deserted finally by his foreign abetters, was defeated, and as a prisoner shot by the Mexicans, June 19, 1867. The Atlantic cable was laid from Valencia Bay in Ireland to Hart's content Newfoundland 1,864 miles, and the line from New York to the latter place, built in 1856, a distance of 1,000 miles, making it all, as keen mathematicians will see, 2,864 miles. A very agreeable commercial treaty with China was arranged in 1868. Grant and Colfax, Republicans, succeeded Andrew Johnson in the next election, Horatio Seymour of New York, and Frank P. Blair of Missouri, being the Democratic nominees. Virginia and Mississippi had not been fully reconstructed, and so were not yet permitted to vote. They have squared the matter up since, however, by voting with great enthusiasm. In 1869, the Pacific Railroad was completed, whereby the trip from the Atlantic to the Pacific, 3,300 miles, might be made in a week. It also attracted the Asiatic trade, and tea, silk, spices, and leprosy found a new market in the land of the free and the home of the brave. Still flushed with its success and humorous legislation, Congress, on the 30th of March 1870, passed the 15th amendment, giving to the colored men the right to vote. It then became a part of the Constitution, and people who have seen it there speak very highly of it. Prosperity now attracted no attention whatever. Gold, worth nearly three dollars at the close of the war, fell to a dollar and ten cents, and the debt during the first two years of this administration was reduced two hundred million dollars. Genuine peace reigned in the entire republic, and oared the scarred and shell torn fields of the south, there waved, in place of hostile banners, once more the cotton and the corn. The red foliage of the gumtree with the white and the snowy white cotton fields, and the bluegrass of Kentucky, footnote, bluegrass is not, strictly speaking, blue enough to figure international colors, but the author has taken out a poetic license, which does not expire for over a year yet. And he is therefore, under its permission, allowed a certain amount of idiocy. End of footnote, show that the fields had never forgotten their loyalty to the national colors. Peace, under greatly changed conditions, resumed her vocations, and in the language of the poet, quote, there were domes of white blossoms where swelled the white tent, there were plows in the track where the war wagons went, there were songs where they lifted up Rachel's lament, end quote. October 8th, 1871, occurred the great fire in Chicago, raging for 48 hours and devastating 3,000 acres of the city. 25,000 buildings were burned, and $200 million worth of property. 100,000 people lost to their houses, and over seven and one half millions of dollars were raised for those who needed it, all parts of the world uniting to improve the joyful opportunity to do good without a doubt of its hearty appreciation. Boston also had a $70 million fire in the heart of the wholesale trade covering 60 acres, and in the prairie and woods fires of Wisconsin, Minnesota, and Michigan, many people lost not only their homes, but their lives. 1,500 people perished in Wisconsin alone. In 1871, the damage done by Alabama, a British-built ship, and several other cruisers sent out partly to facilitate the cotton trade, and partly to do a little fighting when a federal vessel came that way, was assessed at 15,000, $500,000 against Great Britain by the arbitrators who met at Geneva, Switzerland, and the Northwestern boundary line between the United States and British America was settled by arbitration, the Emperor of Germany acting as arbitrator and deciding in favor of America. This showed that people who have just wound up a big war have often learned some valuable sense, not $2 billion worth, perhaps, but some. San Domingo was reported for sale, and a committee looked at it, priced it, etc., but Congress decided not to buy it. The Liberal Republican Party, or that element of the original party which was opposed to the administration, nominated Horace Greeley of New York, while the old party renominated General Grant for the term to succeed himself. The latter was elected and Mr. Greeley did not long survive his defeat. The MoDoc Indians broke loose in the early part of Grant's second term, and leaping from their lava beds early in the morning, Shacknasty Jim and other unlaundry children of the forest raised merry future punishment, and the government, always kind, always loving and sweet toward the Red Brother, sent a peace commission with popcorn balls and a gentle-voiced parson to tell Shacknasty James and old stand-up and sit-down that the White Father at Washington loved them and wanted them all to come and spend the summer at his house, and also that by sin death came into the world, and that we were all primordial germs at first, and that we should look up, not down, look out, not in, look forward, not backward, and lend the hand. It was at this moment that early to bed and early to rise Blackhawk and Shacknasty James, thinking that this thing had gone far enough, killed General Canby and wounded both Mr. Meacham and Reverend Dr. Thomas, who had never had an unkind thought toward the MoDocs in their lives. The troops then allowed their ill temper to get the best of them, and asked the MoDocs if they meant anything personal by their action, and learning that they did, the soldiers did what with the proper authority they would have done at first, bombarded the children of the forest, and must up their lava beds so that they were glad to surrender. In 1873, a panic occurred after the failure of J. Cook and Company of Philadelphia, and a money stringency followed. The Democrats, attributing it a good deal to the party in power, just as cheap Republicans twenty years later charged the Democratic administration with the same thing. Inconsistency of this kind keeps good men, like the writer, out of politics, and turns their attention toward the contemplation of a better land. In 1875, centennial anniversaries began to ripen, and continued to fall off the different branches of government, according to the history of events so graphically set forth in the preceding pages. They were duly celebrated by a happy and self-made people. The centennial exposition at Philadelphia in 1876 was a marked success in every way, nearly ten millions of people having visited it, who claimed that it was well worth the price of admission. Aside from the fact that these ten millions of people had talked about it to ten millions of folks at home, or thought they had, the exposition was a boon to everyone, and thousands of Americans went home with a knowledge of their country that they had never had before, and pointers on blowing out gas which saved many lives in actor years. End of Chapter 30 Chapter 31 Closing Chronicles In 1876 the peaceful Sioux took an outing, having refused to go to their reservation in accordance with the treaty made with the great father at Washington D.C., and regular troops were sent against them. General Custer, with the Seventh Regiment, led the advance, and General Terry aimed for the rear of the children of the forest up the big horn. Here on the 25th of June, without assistance, and with characteristic courage, General Custer attacked the enemy, sending Colonel Reno to fall on the rear of the village. Scarcely enough of Custer's own command with him at the time lived long enough to tell the story of the battle. General Custer, his two brothers, and his nephew were among the dead. Reno held his ground until reinforced, but Custer's troops were exterminated.  The Fenimore Cooper Indian is no doubt a brave and highly intellectual person, educated abroad, refined, and cultivated by foreign travel, graceful in the grub dance, or scalp walk around, yet tender-hearted as a girl, walking by night, fifty-seven miles in a single evening to warn his white friends of danger. The Indian, introduced into literature, was a bronze Apollo who bathed almost constantly, and only killed white people who were unpleasant in course. He dressed in new and fresh buck skins, with trimmings of same, and his sable hair hung glossy and beautiful down the coppery billows of muscles on his back.  He lies, he steals, he assassinates, he mutilates, he tortures. He needs Persian powder long before he needs the theology which Abler men cannot agree upon. We can, in fact, only retain him as we do the Buffalo, so long as he complies with the statutes. But the Red Brother is on his way to join the Cave Bear, the three-toed horse, and the ichthyosaurus in the great fossil realm of the historic past. Move on, maroon brother, move on. Rutherford B. Hayes and William A. Wheeler were nominated in the summer of 1876, and so close was the fight against Samuel J. Tilden and Thomas A. Hendricks that friends of the latter to this day refer to the selection of Hayes and Wheeler by a joint electoral commission to whom the contested election was referred, as a fraud and larceny on the part of the Republican Party. It is not the part of an historian who is absolutely destitute of political principles to pass judgment. Facts have crept into this history. It is true that no one could regret it more than the author. Yet there has been no biased or political prejudice shown, other than that reflected from the historical sources whence information was necessarily obtained. Hayes was chosen, and gave the country an unruffled, unbiased administration devoid of frills, and absolutely free from the appearance of hostility to any one. He was one of the most conciliatory presidents ever elected by Republican votes, or counted in by a joint electoral commission. He withdrew all troops from the south, and in several southern states, things wore a democratic ear at once. In 1873, Congress demonetized silver, and quite a number of businessmen were demonetized at the same time. So in 1878, silver was made a legal tender for all debts. As a result, in 1879, gold for the first time in 17 years sold at par. Troubles arose in 1878 over the right to fish in the northeast waters, and the treaty at Washington resulted in an award to Great Britain of five million, five hundred thousand dollars, with the understanding that wasteful fishing should cease, and that as soon as either party got enough for a mess, he should go home, no matter how well the fish seemed to be biting. The right to regulate Chinese immigration was given by treaty at Peking, and ever since, the Chinaman has entered our enclosures in some mysterious way, made enough in a few years to live like a potentate in China, and returned, leaving behind a pleasant memory and a chiffonniere here and there throughout the country, filled with scorched shirt bosoms, acid-eaten collars, and white vests with burglar proof in growing pockets in them. The next nominations for president and vice president were James A. Garfield of Ohio and Chester A. Arthur of New York on the Republican ticket, and Winfield S. Hancock of Pennsylvania, and William H. English of Indiana on the Democratic ticket. James B. Weaver was connected with this campaign also. Who will tell us what he had to do with it? Can no one tell us what James B. Weaver had to do with the campaign of 1881? Very well. I will tell you what he had to do with the campaign of 1881. He was the presidential candidate on the greenback ticket, but it was kept so quiet that I am not surprised to know that you did not hear about it. After the inauguration of Garfield, the investigation and annuling of star-route contracts fraudulently obtained were carried out, whereby $2 million worth of these corrupt agreements were rendered null and void. On the morning of July 2nd, President Garfield was shot by a poor, miserable, unbalanced, and abnormal growth whose name will not be discovered even in the appendix of this work. He was tried, convicted, and sent squealing into eternity. The president lingered patiently for two months and a half when he died. After the accession of President Arthur, there occurred floods on the lower Mississippi, whereby 100,000 people lost their homes. The administration was not in any way to blame for this. In 1883, the Brooklyn Bridge across East River was completed and ready for jumping purposes. It was regarded as a great engineering success at the time, but it is now admitted that it is not high enough. A person jumping from it is not always killed. The same year the civil service bill became a law. It provides that competitive examinations shall be made of certain applicants for office, whereby mail carriers must prove that they know how to teach school, and guards in the United States penitentiaries are required to describe how to navigate a ship. Possibly recent improvements that have been made by which the curriculum is more fitted to the crime, but in the early operations of the law, the janitor of a jail had to know what length shadow would be cast by a pole, 18 feet, six and a quarter inches high, on the third day of July at 11 o'clock, 30 minutes, and 20 seconds, standing on a knoll, 35 feet, eight and one eighth inches high, provided eight men in nine days can erect such a pole working eight hours per day. In 1883, letter postage was reduced from three cents to two cents per half ounce, and in 1885, to two cents per ounce. In 1884, Alaska was organized as a territory, and after digging the snow out of Sidka so that the governor should not take cold in his system, it was made the seat of government. Chinese immigration in 1882 was forbidden for 10 years, and in 1884, a treaty with Mexico was made, a copy of which is on file with the State Department, but not allowed to be loaned to the author for use in this work. Grover Cleveland and Thomas A. Hendricks were nominated and elected at the end of President Arthur's term, running against James G. Blaine and John A. Logan, the Republican candidates, also Benjamin F. Butler, and A. M. West of Mississippi on the People's Ticket, and John P. St. John and William Daniel on the Prohibition Ticket. St. John went home and kept bees so that he could have honey to eat on his Kansas locusts, and Daniel swore he would never enter the performing cage of immoral political wild beasts again while reason remained on her throne. In 1886, a presidential succession law was passed, whereby on the death of the president and the vice president, the order of succession shall be the Secretary of State, the Secretary of Treasury, Secretary of War, the Attorney General, the Postmaster General, and the Secretaries of the Navy and of the Interior. This gives the Secretary of Agriculture an extremely remote and rarefied chance at the presidency. Still, he should be just as faithful to his trust as if he were nearer the throne. May 4th, 1886 occurred a terrible outbreak of Chicago anarchists, whereby seven policemen were sent to preserve order, were killed by the bursting of an anarchist's bomb. The anarchists were tried and executed with the exception of Ling, who ate a dynamite capsule and passed into rest having had his features and especially his nose blown in a swift and earnest manner. Death resulted and whiskers and beer blossoms are still found embedded in the stone walls of his cell. Those who attended the funeral say that Ling, from a scenic point of view, was not a success. Governor Alt Gelde of Illinois, an amateur American in the summer of 1893, pardoned two of the anarchists who had escaped death by imprisonment. August 31st, 1886 in Charleston occurred several terrible earthquake shocks, which seriously damaged the city and shocked and impaired the nerves and health of hundreds of people. The noted heroism and pluck of the people of Charleston were never shown to greater advantage than on this occasion. Mr. Cleveland was again nominated but was defeated by General Benjamin Harrison. Honorable James G. Blaine of Maine was made Secretary of State and William Wyndham, a veteran financier, Secretary of the Treasury. Secretary Wyndham's tragic death just as he had finished a most brilliant address to the great capitalists of New York after their annual dinner and discussion at Delmonico's is and will ever remain while life lasts a most dramatic picture in the author's memory. Personally, the administration of President Harrison will be long remembered for the number of deaths among the families of the executive and those of his cabinet and friends. Nebraska, the 37th state, was admitted March 1st, 1867. The name signifies Water Valley. Colorado, the Centennial State, was the 38th. She was admitted July 1st, 1876. Six other states have been since admitted when the political sign was right. Still, they have not always stuck by the party admitting them to the union. This is the kind of ingratitude which sometimes leads to the reformation of politicians supposed to have been dead in sin. President Harrison's administration was a thoroughly upright and honest one so far as it was possible for it to be after his party had drifted into the musty catacombs of security and office and the ship of state had become covered with large and expensive barnacles. As we go to press, his successor, Grover Cleveland, in the first year of his second administration, is paying a high price for fleeting fame with the serious question of what to do with the relative coinage of gold and silver and the Democrats in Congress for the first time in the history of the world are referring each other with hot breath and flashing eye to the platform they adopted at national convention. Here, too, for among the politicians, a platform like that on the railway cars is made for the purpose of helping the party to get aboard but not to ride on. The Columbian Exposition and World's Fair at Chicago in the summer of 1893 eclipsed all former exhibitions costing more and showing greater artistic taste, especially in its buildings than anything preceding it. Some gentle warfare resulted from a struggle over the question of opening the white city on Sunday and a great deal of bitterness was shown by those who opposed the opening and who had for years favored the Sunday closing of Niagara. A doubtful victory was obtained by the Sunday Openers for so many of the exhibitors closed their departments that visitors did not attend on Sunday in paying quantities. Against a thousand odds and over a thousand obstacles, especially the apprehension of Asiatic cholera and the actual sudden appearance of a gigantic money panic, Chicago, heroic and victorious carried out her mighty plans and gave to the world an exhibition that won gold opinions from her friends and stilled in dumb wonder the jealousy of her enemies. In the meantime, the author begs leave to thank his readers for the wrapped attention shown in perusing these earnest pages and to apologize for the tears of sympathy thoughtlessly rung from eyes, unused to weep by the graphic word painting and fine education shown by the author. It was not the intention of the writer to touch the fountain of tears and create washouts everywhere, but sometimes tears do one good. In closing, would it be out of place to say that the stringency of the money market is most noticeable and the most painful? And for that reason, would it be too much trouble for the owner of this book to refuse to loan it, thereby encouraging its sale and contributing to the comfort of a deserving young man? The end. Appendix. The idea of an appendix to this work was suggested by a relative who promised to prepare it, but who has been detained now for over a year in one of the public buildings of Colorado on the trumped-up charge of horse stealing. The very fact that he was not at once hanged shows that the charge was not fully sustained and that the horse was very likely of little value. The author. End of Chapter 31. And End of Comet History of the United States by Bill Nye. Read by Allison Hester and Athens, Georgia, June, 2008.


So good morning everybody happy new year a little late. First meeting of 2023 and we actually an agenda item pertains to whether we have the whole personnel board team here which it appears we do not. But I don't other than nice to see everybody I hope you had a good holidays and a rare to go for winter slash spring term. Don't rush it Tony. Hmm. Don't rush it. Okay. All right. All right. Got a couple weeks before the term starts. Oh okay well I can't believe how late it's starting at UMass this year February. Yeah, that is. Anyway, I hope everybody's doing well I don't really have any announcements. And we need to move on to, does anybody else have some announcements or greetings or want to tell everybody what you did with the days where he went skiing because it wasn't anywhere nearby here that's for sure. I just got back from Aruba. Oh, good for you. One happy islands. It has a lot like Amherst. There's no snow in Aruba either. It's just like Amherst Tony. I mean, really the similarity is there was creepy. How similar it was. I don't have any idea. Does anybody, let's see, Melissa, do we have any folks? No, there's nobody from the public here. Okay. Yeah, reports and comments progress getting employee representative for the board where are we on that. Who knows huh. I myself was not aware of that item and I'm sorry I'm going to take note of that is that something that we're a five member board and two of the slots are designated Tammy has one that's from the library board of trustees and the other is supposed to be more or less a representative of the town employees who I think I learned last time maybe I knew it already the main criterion is you have to live in Amherst. You don't have to have been a former town employee, I guess. Okay. But you have to live in Amherst. All seem to suggest last time they had somebody in mind. But I that there's not yet happened and I want to push pretty hard on getting that slot. Yeah, I agree and Melissa you weren't you didn't have an opportunity to work when Charlie Sherpa who was our former police chief was on the board he was retired but he was on the board I don't know if you know him or met him, but I think it's really good to have that perspective and point of view in these conversations. Okay, so I will add that to my agenda and follow up on that. I don't know who the person is that Paul seemed to have in mind. Yeah. Well, we just I really want to push on that, you know, they deserve representation. We need as much good input for deliberations as possible it also when there are actually only four members of the board can run into and it's been a close call a couple of times, not having a quorum because when one of us can't be here. We know that we knew that in 10, Tammy's case last time, then if a, if a second person can't be here. No quorum, no legal meeting. So I would like to get that fixed and I'm going to toss out an idea here this may or may not be. Well, I'll just toss it out we have we have two people who are in the area I don't know if either one of them lived in Amherst that certainly know a heck of a lot about the deliberations of this board. And one is the former HR director Deb Bradway, who I think works for Hadley now. And the other is Joanne Mziasek, who just took the job in Delta town. That may be too much of a good thing. I don't know, having all that expertise, we maybe need somebody a little, you know, more removed from the deliberations of the board but I'd like to see that yet. My brain was going a whole nother way. I was thinking. The idea is to have somebody that can that has the pulse of employees what's going on for employees right of the town so I know this is sort of maybe a little left field but like, I don't know if any of you know the app next door. Don't have it. It's called next door. And basically, it's by zip code. And where people get like it's a neighbor thing.  But a lot of really good networking happens through next door. And I just didn't know. It's very on the ground, and it's people that live in the zip code work live. And so, I don't know, I just, I would seem to me that being on this board would be there's some there would be people that would be like yeah. I would like to do that but would have no idea that this position is here. And so somehow getting the word out through a more on the ground to the people. Good to me. Yeah, I'm not sure about that but I do agree with maybe a more proactive approach to getting a somebody on because I mean that opens up a big can of worms. However, I don't know can can Paul or somebody's, or maybe you already have sent out an email to the current employees to see if they might say, offer a suggestion of a former co worker. Yeah, that was sensitive and paid attention to town management lives in the area. I mean I agree we need somebody and Charlie was great, because he was definitely an on the ground person horse full representative. Yes, yeah, that's right. That's right. When Charlie speaks we listen. Yeah. Yeah, the other just Melissa, a little bit of history that that person that that seat that is often where employees who have an issue will turn first. This is really bugging me I got to give Charlie a call. I don't know more can do anything or what can be done about it. Yeah. Yeah, okay. So it is. It really is best if it's a person reasonably well known to the employees and somebody they would, you know trust and respect to look out for their interest and be a good listener so. I agree with you Kevin I don't know how, if, if this position has been advertised, if it's been posted. But soliciting some input from those folks seems like a very reasonable way to proceed. So that's set it as a goal the next time we meet. We want that person to be a member of the board whoever she or he is. Anything we can do will do, we'll do it. Is there anyone on the list who's recently retired who might be appropriate I don't know enough about town employees but that might be a possibility. Yeah, that's a good suggestion. I like that. I'm just retired after five years. Let's see. George Gillespie firefighter. Oh that's after almost 10 years. Yeah, Stephen call in the fire just retired after 30 years. And 30 years Wow. Oh that's right yes. Lost my. My mathematics ability there for a moment. Anyway, alright let's move on. Next here. New business. Full time non union compensation and classification study. Yeah, about that for a long time. Any news on that front. Yes. So I apologize if this is an old piece of business to me it is a new piece of business. But anyhow the town last did a compensation and classification study in 2014. And of course since that time, wages and the employment landscape has changed significantly. So in an effort to remain competitive and to be an employer of choice, we'd like to endeavor to do another compensation and classification study for non units outside of the school department. The study will determine whether existing salaries and come and the compensation structure for non union employees at the town of Amherst are competitive within today's markets, and will further address internal relationships within the organization to help determine equity. So I have prepared a SQ SWQ which is in quotes as this project $50,000 and responses will be due at the end of the month. So we expect this project to take less than a year and of course before implementing any changes will be to the wages or the classifications will be seeking this committee's feedback. And of course I suspect that further administration administrative action will be necessary, but I will keep you posted as as this goes along. We hope that work will start very soon. Okay, good. SWQ. Seeking written quotes, as opposed to RFP. Okay, I was going to ask you, Melissa, are you reading from an RFP there. This is a SWQ. I am told so I'm new to this process. But because it is under a certain monetary threshold, it's a little bit different of a process. Yes. And what's the upper limit on the budget. 40 40. Okay. All right. And I am, I believe it will be much less than that. Okay. Well, the last one certainly was so we're dealing with 61 non union employees and 48 non union positions. Yes, yes. And I mean that's, that's the focus. But often what the results of that study is when they're implemented becomes sort of a benchmark to look at all the other systems that we've got. So everything has to remain in balance you're going to you're going to discover if you haven't already even though you've only been around full time for about a month is a heck of a balancing act. And that goes on with probably with everything, but with the personnel procedures. And the personnel board, you know, our domain in one sense is rather narrow because our primary focus is just the folks who aren't in the union. And as I'm sure you've learned by now I think the town has five or six unions that you also have to deal with. And they negotiate their own contracts and so everything sort of has to be more or less in sync so that one party is not way out of whack with with the other. Okay, so that's about to go out right that's about to go viral. Yeah, oh yeah we're we're seeking responses by the end of the month. Okay. All right. And I just ask just for process. Is that is this what towns do they conduct studies X number of years after X number of years to determine salary scales. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, every once in a while and I think 10 years is a good mark. We start with surveys of other towns and other regions and maybe for competitive positions we may look to the private sector. And we start with this study and then we compare what we find to where we are to see if, if we're competitive or we need to adjust the scale and the wages. And that work makes total sense to me. The part I'm thinking of is, do we always bring in an external consultant to do that work like, do we just not do that. Well, no, I think that an external consultant is standard and we did do that in 2014. Yeah, I know we did and I'm just trying to I'm like thinking like right. And so, like that's not work that we just do as the town to like survey figure out what's going on we towns higher external firms to tell them what's going on. Yes, and then I were looking also for kind of a guide to help us along for the next, you know, maybe 10 years to do those kind of changes ourselves to help us move along ourselves and then you know, at a certain point we'll want to check back in I guess with the temperature of the employment. Yeah, landscape. Yeah, I'm just learning because I don't come from public, you know, administration come from school the school side of life and it's like, yeah, so like a finance department accountant we would handle like this was going on and the other districts and this is what we got to do and here are the state guidelines and so I just was struck for a minute like oh right do we always go out for an external consultant. I know that where I'm coming from in the Community College system we were looking at doing that. Yeah, all of the college systems where yeah well Community College is great thank you. The answer, Rebecca is almost always by way back when this was when I first joined the board. Long time ago. At that time, the board was actually finishing doing it themselves. Yeah. And I think the learning from that it was well we don't ever want to do that again or say right. It's a lot of work and and I and and it was a lot of work for me and the board members actually did a lot of interviewing and a lot of analyzing and stuff like that and I think I remember specifically they went to the business school to see if folks there had expertise in classification systems and all of that stuff. And basically the learning from that was well let's use a professional who does this and knows how to do it and has data available for comparisons. But I do want to mention with respect to the surveys that actually I think it was only about three years ago when there was a feeling among sort of upper level managers in the town that all of this attention, this is sort of driven by raising the minimum wage and that those positions at the high level were beginning to fall behind. And we were going to try to investigate that and then Paul said, I think great Barrington just did a little survey of their own to see how people at the manager director whatever the classification is it's not quite what we might call the glass ceiling level but so they had done a survey throughout the state. And when that was done we looked at the data and the data said no Amherst is not our managers are not out of whack with what most. There's always a couple of towns in the in the Commonwealth, where they get the money to pay those kinds of rates is there's no wonder about it I think what a town on the Cape seems to have a lot of money I don't know if it was Brookline or some some other place had no pay scales that were generally you know, on the high end a real real stretch so the surveys that are available are consulted. I don't know what their needs are, but we're ready to do another serious look at this with the help of a professional who knows what they're doing and see what they come up with. And let's hope, you know, in the end it's money well spent and the town and particularly its employees are better off or specifically those not in the union but again this is probably going to, you know, trickle down to everybody. Pretty soon unions are going to look at me well wait a minute come on. No we need to do this although in a couple of the unions there's, well I think most of them. But they've got their own really good data, you know what are firefighters being paid and so forth and the police officers, but so I'm glad this is underway. The history is helpful thank you. Yes, could I. Sure. Just also note that I've been watching the council meetings on zoom and there's a lot of pressure right now on the town and the school department that the administrators are making too much money. So I think this, a lot of complaints about fairness and equity so I think this is a very proactive way for us to be dealing because these complaints, although they may have no legitimate backing. To help the morale or the or the credibility at the town so then one other thing. I know this is always seems like the question is the town versus the private institutions, and is there any way we will have some idea when this survey when this work is done now we rank with private companies and particularly in terms of those highly skilled positions where people leave or are tempted to leave. This isn't it. This is about states is about town employees is it not. Yes, yeah. Yes, and I assume, I assume that we will have that data, some idea. I do believe so. It people leave because they could get twice as much in a different town these are how these towns ranked. Yeah, I think we will see that comparison. Yes, it'll be helpful. Okay. All right. Next agenda item remote work policy. Well, since COVID remote and hybrid work because we have become really commonplace in the workplace and in an effort to know it's also desired employee benefit. So again, in order to remain competitive and so that our practices. We want to begin working on a remote work policy. And so my predecessor began some research on some other policies and I'll take up where she left off and continue that research and take a first pass at drafting a remote work policy. And that this committee can help me bet, along with other multiple stakeholders, so that we can come out with something that we can present to the people. I think it's going to take a lot of collaborative work to come out with this. I do have a little bit of experience with this in my past. So I'll also draw from there but it's going to be an interesting process I think. So I asked the dumb question for a member of the personnel board. Do we have a remote work policy now. We do not. Okay. So, getting one kind of seems like a reasonable idea. Yes. So, and I, and I do know that there were it, you know, I think Paul was under some, some duress from time to time about who can work where and who has to be in town hall and that sort of stuff. So, some kind of a policy that can be leaned on by those who make, you know, decisions is probably a good idea. So good luck with that task. Oh, it's going to be daunting. You came to work for the town now. I think it'll, it'll be interesting though. And now there's another not that tiny project on the agenda update on the personnel procedures manual committee review is that's a no small undertaking at least the last time we did it was a pre major collaborative effort so what's happened on that front. So we went into the files and it looks like this group got together a few times in the spring and in the early fall and so I've called them back together our first meeting will be January 23. There's a lot of us I've also invited the DEI director to join that group so it was the last working group has been recalled. And I've all I've discovered a pattern of in their schedule in the schedule for the next couple of months so I'll be able to find a way to meet with the group. I expect we'll meet by weekly until our work is complete but I'll know more after our first meeting, and after I know more of how the group wants to proceed. Okay. So that is underway about to be formed. Yes. Now, Rebecca, I want to go to you because when we were talking about this last time I think you were wondering, you know, what. Would the board be more involved in this process or something like that maybe, maybe that isn't exactly what you were wondering about, but I know, you know for a while. Quite a few years ago I think this might have been before you, you were with us but the board was going line by line on the whole. And then that got to be a lot of work and coordinating it and so forth and then when Deb Bradway said well let's pull together a team of employees and do it. That's turned out to be a much better way to do it process wise besides the bonus of little team building that was that was on that and I don't have any ticket I'm just wondering. And I'm thinking out loud now. And I should have thought about this before because the question I'm asking myself is there any are there any particular parts of that personnel procedures manual that I think we need to pay special attention to. And so Tony is now going to tell himself we'll go look at it and see. And if, if, if there is then tell somebody about it encourage colleagues I'm sure that's what you'd like to do just before you go to bed is to get that old manual out there and take a look at it and if you don't find an issue that needs attention before you go to sleep and that's okay. All right. So Tony were you asking me to weigh in. You, you prepped. Yeah okay so I just want to. So just some thoughts. I think it is would be prudent for the us our board to put our eyes on the manual. I think, I think that's really important I think they're really good protocols for dialogue though I don't think it should be like here's the manual if it feedback. Yeah, that doesn't work at all. If the idea is like maybe the table of contents, and we did a pass of like, you know, like, yeah we should look at that no we shouldn't look at that or something. I noticed when I look at this table of contents what do I wonder something, because I think we should have our eyes on it. Yes it's a better process stronger if it's an employee team, and this board had a whole dimension that it added to that personnel manual about what is professional development for upper managers. How should people work together what does it mean to give feedback what does it mean to supervise things that maybe employees wouldn't. It's coming from their own lived experience in it and our team was coming from a like more global this is how it's going on in the world that we want to make sure it's happening. So, I have a combo of like we should put our eyes on it to see if there's some area that we really ought to dig into. Also, I know Tony and I know all of us like oh the manual read it at night fall asleep I don't know why it has to be that way. Why does a manual use Canva and have graphics and be great and show it's a town of choice to work in like what, why does it. Why does it have to be terrible, you know like or boring, it doesn't have to be so that's just another thing too I think of is like what is the intended use and users of the manual. It could also be this beautiful selling point when you come on board you're like what an engaging interactive manual what what that's 21st century. I just want to put that perspective in there as well, like we've totally redid our graduate student handbooks in the College of Ed, to make them something that students are like using, and then we use it in our marketing materials and anyway. That could be too much who wants to do that nobody wants to do that okay, but I just want to put it out there. Well, I was just doing a very quick search real time on, can I find the old manual, and the answer is no, not in 60 seconds, but look what I did find. I don't know if you can read it. Final report. The last one. Which goes back to another thing that's on the agenda was on the minutes from last time and I think I asked about it, or somebody did that. Could we get going in using some sort of communication set of tools where it's not like where's the manual, we just go to the drive, or the team folder, or they like there it is that we just would pull it up right now we've having in front of us. So. So, I think we do we do have a mechanism for that we have a shared drive that people can access. I don't know if you have access, you probably should but I thought the comment was more geared toward when we start working on it, can we put it in a shared doc. That's the notes I took, but that could be good to just like right now we're talking about the, we're talking about it. There was a link in the agenda right now even PDF so visually we were looking at it together. Just be so helpful. Okay, yeah, and just do you have access to that J drive I think it's the J drive right Elizabeth. I don't know. I don't know. I think not but I don't know is the more accurate answer. So, okay we'll look into that. Right. I think we're ready to take a look at the latest staffing report. Which didn't show a whole lot of action comings and goings. And I don't think there's a fact. I think only one person has been hired since the last report. And everybody who has come and gone in the last month they're all white people. There are two men left and one woman is come on board in public works. So as a quiet month of hiring and departing. Can you just maybe I'm a little bit curious, what are the searches that are going on right now if there is there. I mean, for, for example, let's take the police department. About which we read in the paper now and then some folks thinking they're too many and something they're not enough to are there is a police. And this is just for my own interest and and if it more is everybody else we don't have to talk about about our is the police department looking for more folks do we know. I know that they're Elizabeth guy. I was just going to say I know that you took part in some interviews. A couple of weeks ago for a patrolman yes. So I think that they are trying to get ahead of it so that when the next Academy happens, they have some prospects already lined up for it. Yep. And how about fire. Are they. I don't think they've started interviewing but I know we put an ad out for firefighters I think beginning in December. So I think that they're sifting through all the applications that come in and in the coming weeks will be setting up interviews. Okay. Any other areas that are needing to be. Elizabeth mentioned last time the planning department is is down to planners so I think that they think they did interviews last week. So I think they're going to be making decisions this week or next week about who to move forward with. Okay. And Elizabeth I don't, I don't know if you know, but I'm pretty sure. The board does a whole lot of hires a whole lot of part-timers for the summer. Right. And I, I, I don't know how they do that. I think it must go reasonably smooth because I don't think that's ever been an issue that the board has had to pay attention to, but I would imagine at some point this spring, there's you guys in the HR department are going to be doing a lot of paperwork, bringing that's what I heard. Yes. I think early, maybe to mid spring, before the summer comes, I think Amherst rec hires quite a bit of staff. I obviously wasn't here for it this past year, but I think we're going to try to be well prepared. I know that E in our office has been doing had done a lot of work with the rec center to make it more smooth and is working actively with them to make that a smooth onboarding process. I think leisure services does has more part-timers than the rest of the town combined by by several factors, because of all the part-time help. Even not just in the in the summer but you know, basketball referees and things like that. Okay. So, again, moving along here, I think we're ready to look at the minutes of our December meeting and see if we need to make any revision for additions, exceptions. If not, do I hear a motion to approve the minutes of the December 21. I make a motion to approve. Is that going to get any discussion. All they were say aye. Aye. Opposed abstentions. Okay. So I'm not voting because I wasn't there. Okay. All right. Next, board meeting. We put February 15 there with a sort of a question mark because and this is actually I'm looking forward and I'm sorry Paul isn't here to now is about the time when we start talking about the annual employees meeting. Normally has been sometime in March, and it's a big deal Melissa. Paul, the town manager is usually the star attraction because he has a few things to say and brings everybody up to date, particularly on wage and salary and cola and things like that. And it's for the, for the board members, it's mostly for us a listening session. What's on your minds, you know what do we need to be paying attention to. And so that's what that's what we do. My memory is. And let me see. Rebecca and Catherine, I think that March meeting last year was shoved back to April. Maybe even may I know it was one year I think Paul felt that if we delayed it by a month, he'd have more to say. So, I'm just raising the issue about that pretty important meeting. As we talk about whether or when we meet in February. Let me see I think from some of the things Melissa just said we might have some important news to talk about then. Right on the, for example, how the work is going on looking at the manual and, and you said that the bids were, were, were due the end of January. Right. So, well, we'll be able to identify who's working with us. And at that point I think they'll have hopefully begun some interviews with some directors and and other people. Also, I think I'll have something on the remote work for you. Okay, so, so because we have from time to time when when it's known in advance that we're very unlikely to have anything super urgent or super important at our normally scheduled next monthly meeting we'll just say well let's wait until the next following month but I'm what I'm hearing is yeah we should go ahead and change the take away the question mark about the February meeting it will be Wednesday the 15th. Does that sound right to the rest of my colleagues. So, you raise the question mark move it from pencil to ink as we old fashioned folks used to say I just want to put out there that I had a permanent meeting that day. That time. Well, what a terrible conflict for you Rebecca now. Let me tell you I prefer to be at this meeting. Well, then, you know, you need, you have a higher calling the citizens. The meeting is not till 1030 is our meeting at nine. Yeah. Oh, okay it's fine. You can handle it. I can definitely handle it. Yes. I remind me was our was the meeting on zoom last year we didn't come in for it did we. I think it was on zoom. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it's been a while. Yeah. All right. It used to be a packed house. Where was it held in the past. Yeah. Okay, of course. Yeah, which had more room and it does now had more room than two. Yeah, but it's been several years since we've had that townwide employee meeting in in person. Yep. So, I think we're, we're, we're agreed that we will meet February the 15th. And any other issues to put before this August body. If night see you can make both meetings next on the 15th.  Thanks everybody. Have a good afternoon. Bye bye.


horse for the speed of light, a cloud of dust in the hearty high old silver, the lone ranger. The Western United States, the hearty pioneers faced many dangers. Hostile Indians, outlaws, blazing heat, bitter cold. The worst of all, the torrential floods of springtime. Many of the settlers would have lost their lives and property. If it had not been for the masked rider the planes, no one knew how to combat the forces of nature better than he. And his strength and courage made possible the winning of the West. Return with us now to those thrilling days of yesteryear. From out of the past, from the thundering hoofbeats of the great horse Silver, the lone ranger rides again. Come on, Silver! Heavy black clouds gathered, then suddenly emptied upon the rocks and crags below. Day after day, while thunder rolled and lightning flashed above desolate canyons, the storms continued. Dry gulches filled with water, creeks became rivers, rivers became torrents that roared towards the level plains below. Just east of the mountains, for the little town of Riverside, rested within a bend of red river, there had been no rain. The sky was clear as a horseman raced along the main street and out of town soared Munson's ranch house. Get up there! Come on, boy! We gotta see the water! We gotta see him and the dog going, hurry!  Get along with you! Get up there! Come on, get up there! Stand right there, fella. Early word and thunder you. Listen. You've been gone a week. How about them cows that sent you after? You trail them down? Won't you give me a chance to talk? Well... Boss, you figured maybe them critters straight to the north and got lost in them drawers. Didn't they? Well, I tell it. I made camp in the line cabin, like you said, and started hunting around. Yeah. No sign of them. So then I... So then I got the thinking of them engines from the hills. They could have stolen my... I decided to find out. That's where you've been? Yeah. But if they stole your stairs, we'll never know it. They cleared out. Eh? What's their village, you mean? Not only left it, but took everything along to get carried. Wife of? Because that dam of theirs is gonna bust. What's that? I tell ya, nobody down here's got any notion at all how it's been raining up in the hills. Well, it's like a cloud burst lastin' a couple of weeks or more. Every creek and stream pulled a runnin' over. That ain't happened in 15 years. But if that dam up in the hills goes, it means... It means all that water'll come rowin' down to carry off the bridge from town. Cut us off from the mainland. You're sure there's been that much rain? The dam won't last more than another 24 hours. You can take my word for it. Oh, God. Boss, what do you think? Hadn't we better clear out? We don't. We won't be able to cross the river till it goes down again. There'll be a couple of weeks. There's cattle on the other side to be looked after. Hold it. I'm thinkin'. Oh, but, boss, you've been... The dam will last just about another day, eh? At the most. The bridge goes, we won't be the only ones cut off. The town will be too. Sure, eh? No, wait. Did you stop in town before you came here? I mean, does anybody else know about this? I thought you oughta be warned than the others. Now, if you say so, I'll go back now. And that's the first. Wonder if the folks in town suspicion this. I never heard any talk. I was there most of the mornin'. That's fine. Don't you think I oughta be gettin' to town? Sure. You and mortal both go. Oh, he won't be needed. You'll do like I say. You'll both go. Only when you get there, you won't warn nobody. I'll give you cash to take along. You'll go to every store in town. You'll buy the grub they got and don't stop the haggle. Pay what they ask. Boss, you local? Not by a long sight. Oh, gosh, you can't. Ain't you stopped to figure it out? The town will be cut off. I alone owe the grub. Anybody wants to buy will buy at my price. Come on, I'll rustle up that cash right now. Jason, when I said all the flour you got, that's just what I meant. Why, Curly, what's Monson gonna do with all that? Don't you want to sell? For five cents over my regular price? I'd be a fool if I didn't. Curly, that stuff will be out to your boss's place inside of two hours. Here's your cash, ma'am. Now it's a deal. Damn, Sakes, I've never done so much business all to one since the first kept store. Mr. Monson must be aiming to feed an army. Ma'am, that's his affair. I got to load up. That everything fall? Everything. You've cleaned me out. Ma'am, that's just what I figured to do. Curly, you and Mort have done a good job.  When the bridge goes and folks see what we've done, there's likely to be trouble. That night, a wiggening under the pressure of water stored behind it. The dam burst and the flood rushed through the channel of Red River. It followed a rocky gorge down the mountainside until it reached the plains. At Riverside, it struck the flimsy bridge, connecting the town with the outside world, and demolished it at the first impact. The bridge! The bridge is ours! The wing morning, the townspeople gathered in Hetty Matthews general store. Where did it rain so much? Highest the river's ever been. Can't last, can it? Can't tell. Look out there. Look how the river's racing. Yeah, sure it is. Morning, Sheriff. Morning, Sheriff. Well, Sheriff, what do you think of it? It's awful. A corker, huh? My, whoever dreamed this could happen. Reckon you folks realize you won't be able to cross the river for quite a spell, don't you? How long will that be, Sheriff? Any idea? Depends on how things are on the hills. Can't be no less than 10 days or two weeks, though. Just think of not getting any mail or visitors for all that time. That ain't what I thought of. Mail and visitors can keep. But we can't go for long without it. Who says we're going? Well, what if the river stays in front for longer than we expect? What if our grub gives out? Ain't you kind of barry in trouble? There's something to think of. It'll do to worry about till something worse comes along, I guess. Of course, that's almost all my grub demands in. But Paul and Jason'll have plenty bound to. I know they've got a lot. What'd you say about me and Jason, had he? The sheriff was just worrying about our grub. I said if folks couldn't buy from me, they could buy from you. But they can't. Well, Jason, ask it. That's right. Sold everything we had to Monson, flour, taters, everything. But that's who I sold to. My God. Hey, when was all this? Yesterday, for me. Curly come and got it. That's who I sold to. I sold him what? That's why Paul and me are here, Hedy, to see if you wouldn't share what you got. What ain't got nothing to share. You folks mean to say that Monson has all the grub that was in town?  Well, that ain't nothing to worry about, is it? You sell it back, won't you? That's what I'm wondering. But golly, it is. Monson's pretty slick, and I wouldn't trust him as far as I could see through a stone wall. Hedy, why did you folks sell? Well, I shouldn't, we. Who knew this was going to happen? You just asked a question, I think I can answer. Uh-huh. Monson. And I'm going there to find out. The sheriff rode to Monson's ranch and tried to reason with him. Steady, boy. Now, Monson, you look here. You've got the grub and I'm admitting it. But the price you're asking is all out of reason. Maybe, but you'll pay it or go without. And the folks can't pay? What's that to me? You let them starve? It ain't my fault if they ain't save cash. Just keep your temper and listen to me. The grub is mine. Legal ask what I want. Remember this, don't make threats. It comes to gunplay I got men enough and plenty over. And besides, make trouble and I'll get damages from you. You're lower in a pole, Captain. David, there's your deputy. I want to see you on.  Sheriff, there's a fella setting out to drown himself. Huh? He's making the swim the river on his horse. What's that? You're crazy. I didn't have courage. He couldn't do it. I'll bet he tries. Who is he? I don't know. But he's got the finest looking horse I ever seen. Whiten. He rode up to the far bank with a red skim. Monson, I'll see you later. Anytime, Sheriff, anytime at all. Come on, Ray. That's something I aim to see.  Get up, boy. It was a lone ranger with his great stallion, Silver, who was preparing to challenge the river. Discarding his mask and assuming a disguise, he sent his mounted to the flood, while Tonto obeying his instructions remained behind. Silver fought valiantly, while excited townspeople lined the bank to watch the struggle. Just look at him. I'm a praying for both.  I don't know how they can make it. Hey, here comes the sheriff and deputy. Hi, Sheriff. Look at here. Have you ever seen the beach, Sheriff? Oh, there, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Sheriff, they are never making it. Hey, idiots, what are you standing around for? Give that fellow some help. Ray, give me that rope you got on your saddle. Right. Here. What are you going to do? Throw him a line. What do you suppose? Now stand back. Give me a room. Better get that line through with a hurry, Sheriff. I will. Hi, there. Hi, can you hear me? The rope. I'm throwing this rope. George, pull in and try again. No, wait. He's reaching. By God, he made it. He did it. Now everybody grab a hold and pull. Pull, pull, pull, pull. He's closer. He's going to make it. His horse ought to be touching bottom before long. Don't stop. Everybody together now. Ah. Oh, my land, this is too much excitement for me. He's hit bottom. Here he comes before our horse. Here we are, boy. Pull, pull that. Oh, that's good, fellow. Stranger, never in my life did I see a horse that could do what that was done. This is a close thing. Boy, he don't hardly see more tide than another horse had been after a short run. But, Stranger, what made you do it? I knew this flood had catch you off completely. I was afraid it might have caught you unprepared. You need help? Have you supplies enough till the flood goes down? Mr. Weed, what makes you just as bad off now is the rest of it. And what are you short of? Grub. Not that there ain't enough on hand to feed us if it could just get it. What do you mean? You shouldn't have found out. Did you talk to Monson, Sheriff? I did. What'd he say? We get no grub till we pay his price. And the price, he's asking, is a plenty. Won't sell back for what it cost him, eh? Folks, I don't know how. But somehow, he must have guessed this was coming. That's why he cornered all the supplies. And he's asking. Well, he's asking just exactly twice what he paid at the first. Oh, the rotten scum cooking the Ford. What that means going without, starving. One moment. You need food. You can get it. I have an Indian friend on the other side of the river. He can ride with a message. That's no help. No, you mean well, stranger than we think it. But the engine might just as well be on the other side of the mountains for all the good he can do us. You're wrong. Well, in the first place, you can't get word to it. It'd never be heard across the river. And if he could hear you, we'd still be as bad off. It'll be another 10 days anyhow, before the river goes down enough to try bridging it. But if he had grub brought, he'd just set that. So you see, Mr. Weaver. But there are difficulties, but we can get around them. Yeah? We can get word to Taddo. And when the supplies arrive, we'll get them into town. I don't see how. But you will. Now first for the message to Taddo. The curtain falls on the first act of our Lone Ranger story. Before the next exciting scenes, please permit us to pause for just a few moments. Now to continue our story. The Lone Ranger made certain preparations. And half an hour later, he was ready to send a message to Taddo. I know what that thing is. It's gone if it ain't a kite. Why flew one of them things when I was just a young'un? Watch it first. The wind is blowing across the river. Hey, you mean? Taddo has instructions. He's on the watch. When we release the kite, he'll pick it up. The message I have fixed to it will do the rest. Well, why in Tugget could we have thought of that? One of them easy things that just don't come to mind. Yeah, but even so. You don't know how the supplies will be brought across once they're here, eh? For the life of me, I don't. Well, we don't worry about that later. Ray, you said you've handled the kite. Make this and send it across. Taddo won't need a signal. He'll understand as soon as it's in the air. I'll have it floating about two minutes. Now then, Sheriff, how long will the supplies you have last? Not past tomorrow. I see. It'll be several days before Taddo can return. Uh-huh. So we'll have to get food from Munson to see his through until then. At his price? For nothing. Stranger, did I understand you to say you figured to get grub for Munson for nothing? You did. Well, you're either local or you're figured to take it away with guns. Stranger, if that's what you got in mind, you can count on me. Me too. I'd sure like to throw some lead at them polecats. There'll be no trouble. You think not? Where's Munson's place? Just a jog beyond town. Will you ride there with me? Sure. No reason not to. Good. Here's to me. That enough left, old fellow? Good boy. Ready, Sheriff? Just a second. Me? Yes. Well, we're going. I want you to round up every able-bodied man in town at workahead and hard work. That's our style. Good. Assemble in front of the sheriff's office. What'll I tell him? Tell him I have a plan to get supplies across the river and into town when time will bring them. I'll explain when the sheriff and I return. Right. Let's go, Sheriff. Come on, Silver. The cowboy known as Curly noticed the approach of the sheriff and the stranger on the great white stallion. He opened the door of the ranch house and crawled inside. Hey, boss. Yeah? Here comes the sheriff again. Got a stranger with him. Where they at? Hey, just coming around the bend. Likely bringing cash with him. Come on, we'll see what they have to say. The stranger must have been caught in town when the bridge went out. Likely. Hey, sheriff. Move, move, move, move. Well, sheriff, decide to pay up, did you? Maybe. Maybe not. You can talk that over with this fella. Who are you? Yep. That doesn't matter. What does matter is the fact that town's people must have food. I kind of figured that for myself. But they tell me you're asking a price they can't afford to pay. I get a different opinion. I won't argue with. The point is, you're asking far more than those supplies are worth. Yeah? What would you say grubs worth when you're starving? Monson, you lowdown. Hey, hey, sheriff. Then you won't reconsider, huh? You're holding to the price you're named. Yes, sir. Well, I have a proposition to make. You'll find it fair. Yeah? Give the town's people the food they need.  Eh, what do you mean in kind? I mean that for every barrel of flour, every pound of meat, every bushel of potatoes they receive, you'll get back the same amount of flour, meat, and potatoes as whatever else they've taken. They'll do that inside a week or give you your price. Shucks, mister. If that's your proposition, they might as well pay up right now. They ain't got no more chance of getting supplies in the town within that time than they have in getting the boss to lower his price. Then you've got nothing to lose by it. I don't quite get your idea. Well, it's the only way we'll deal. As your man said, it doesn't look as though a week is time enough to bring in supplies. So you should have nothing to lose. What do you think, Curly? These fellows noticed something we ain't. Been any signs of the river going down? None at all. And if it did, they'd still have their bridge to build afterwards, wouldn't they? Yeah, that's so. And when the week's up, you collect. Yeah. Now, look here, you, Chef, you're willing to put this proposition down in writing? Should I, stranger? Why not? We'd have kept our words anyhow, wouldn't we? Sure. Yeah, Monson. We'll put it in writing. Fine. Come on inside. And remember, this agreement is binding. When the agreement had been made out and signed by the sheriff, he and the Lone Ranger mounted and returned to town. Stranger? Yes. I sure hope you know what you're doing. There's no need to worry. I see the men are gathered in front of your office. Must be just about everybody there. The more, the better. Come on, Silver. Eat up. Eat up there. Whoa, whoa, there's some more. How'd you come out? Make Monson come to terms? Wait. We've made a bargain. You can go to Monson's place and get all the food you'll need. Water? The pole can't come down on his price. What'd you do to persuade him? The sheriff can tell you that later. The problem now is how to bridge the river. Well, we'll have plenty of time to figure that out. Can't do nothing to the flood's past. But we can. Listen. Go ahead, mister. We'll borrow an idea from the soldiers. I'll tell you what I mean. When the Lone Ranger had finished his explanation, one group led by the sheriff returned to Monson's ranch house to get the supplies that had been promised. The remainder followed the Lone Ranger to the dense woods that bordered the west side of town. Soon the sound of axes rang out. The work continued hour after hour. The lead stood for hundreds of years, toppled one by one to the earth. It sprang swiftly forward to trim them up branches. Then, with the help of chains and horses, the work of snaking the logs to the river began. Get up there! Into it, you critters! Pull, Blastia! Pull! Four days the work continued. Four days which finally saw the end of their task in sight. In the meantime, Monson, growing curious, had sent Morton to town to investigate. What Mort saw brought him back to the ranch house at top speed. Oh, oh, there! Oh, fella, oh! It's going to be the dickens to pay. What'd you find out? They've got a way to bridge the river. They're local. They couldn't have. No, well, I've seen it. But I tell you that... That's what they've cut down their logs for. Yeah? They've been hauling them logs down to the river, lashing them together, and then stringing them across. They're most ways across right now. How can they do that? Easy, when you figure it. But I can't... The first logs, they anchor to the shore. Then they just keep flashing one log to the next one. Looks like they're building a whopping big ramp.  I'll bet they reached the other bank of farm Monson. And that means... They bring the supplies across. Pay me back with it and cheat me out of the cash. By thunderousest stranger put them up to this. Ain't anybody in town smart enough to think of that. Yeah, and you know what? That's just why he didn't mind letting the sheriff sign that agreement. He was planning on this stunt all the time. Well, we'll soon fix that. Who listened to this, too? Uh-huh. We can't let supplies get into town, Savvy. Well, how will we stop them? I'll show you. Curly how we fixed for Blaston, Polly. Got plenty. Good. That's all we'll need. That light, working by torchlight, the townsmen rushed to completion of their pontoon bridge. The sheriff directed the work. Asian! Has the land logs out? And they are behind him. Ain't them wagons coming? They did. Supplies! But the sheriff did not know the three stealthy figures avoiding the light. We're edging as close to the pontoon bridge as they dared. So much closer, boss. And we'll be soon scared. No, but if we can't get closer, we'll do us no good. We ain't run much risk. That's your dog gone busy and take notice of us. Come on, you two, Mort. Yeah. Just good enough. You know what I do? I guess so. Hey, Mort, you've got the Blaston body. Uh-huh. Push it under right there. All right. Careful with the hues. I know how to handle this stuff. It's one thing to remember. When this lit, don't wait for nothing. We've got just time enough to clear out, and that's all. There's going to be logs going every which way. But, boss. Well, I forgot about there being fellas working. Huh? What do you mean? Well, they'll get blowed up, too. Can we help that? But gosh, you don't even... You ain't got the backbone of a rabbit. How are you coming, Mort? Just about finished. Hurry it up. Wait. Got a match? Uh-huh. I like it. Get set. Go on. No, you don't. What's the aim, that man? You can't. I've been watching you fellas for justice. Careful. Don't touch that blasting powder. I think the sheriff's going to be interested to see it. Come on, rush back. Oh, my hand. You're not hurt. No way, no. Stand right where you are. Here you are, sheriff. Hey, what's happening here? Look there. What? Blaston powder. Don't set to be touched on. Why, the police catch would have murdered us. Right. Monson, if I didn't represent the law, I'd say you deserve lynching. No, no. Keep them back. Don't let them get us stout. They won't, worse luck. Not going to do you much good. I reckon the law will hang even if it takes a month longer to get around. I tell you, I didn't know. And look there. We finished the bridge. They're already bringing supplies across. And Monson, the stranger out for them, start to finish. They'll move by the highway. I've just heard as a copyrighted feature of the Lone Ranger Incorporated.