We're going to continue our series in Matthew by looking at chapter 10 verses 34 through 42. I chose to entitle this installment of our verse by verse study of Matthew, loving God, and you're going to see what I mean by that in just a moment. But let's begin here in Matthew chapter 10 at verse 34. I'll read to verse 42. We'll get into our study. Jesus says, Matthew chapter 10, verse 34, do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword, for I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. So see ladies, that's what happened. And a man's foes will be those of his own household. He who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. And he who loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And he who does not take his cross and follow after me is not worthy of me. He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for my sake will find it. He who receives you receives me. He who receives me receives him who sent me. He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward. He who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man's reward. And whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of water in the name of a disciple assuredly I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward. Now as we've been going through chapter 10 here in the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus has been giving to us insight into what would be called the earmarks of a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ. And as we've been going through chapter 10, we've seen that when Jesus is speaking concerning to his disciples, we've seen that a disciple is somebody who is teachable, a disciple is somebody who is sacrificial, a disciple is somebody who is committed to serving him. And every genuine follower of Christ will possess these identifiable qualities. When we looked at verses 32 and 33, those verses gave us another earmark and that would be our being open about our relationship to him. Jesus said, whoever confesses me before men. And as I was mentioning to you, the word confess there speaks of openly identifying with him. It speaks of affirming him. It speaks of agreeing with him. The Bible teaches us that Christians confess Christ. That means that we acknowledge him openly. We acknowledge that we have a relationship with him. We acknowledge that he is our Lord and that he is our Savior. We don't have this relationship in a closet. We're not hiding it from the world. We're open about it. We openly acknowledge that we have relationship with him. The way I can illustrate that about openness of relationship is just to cast my memory back several decades now to when a young lady by the name of Marie and I began to date. And I can still remember that I would go out with her and in the early days and I would walk with her and she would walk with me whether we're going to a restaurant or a movie or wherever she was willing to take me and pay for the date. When we would walk, I noticed something. I noticed it fairly early in our early dating life and that would be that when I would walk next to her, she would adjust her purse. So if I were walking on her right side, her purse I started noticing would be on her left side. And I began to wonder what that meant. And so I actually began to play games. I would walk with her. She'd have her purse on her left shoulder and I would slowly kind of just wait and then I'd get on her left shoulder. Then she would remove the purse and put it on her right shoulder and I would walk and her little hand would be doing this kind of thing like, oh, it's lost. It needs to be held, right? So I would look at that and then I wonder if she wants me to hold her hand. So I would slow down and then I'd get on the other side and then I'd see her moving the purse. And suddenly the right hand needed assistance and I saw that over several dates but I wouldn't hold her hand because I didn't want her to get the wrong idea. I didn't want her to think that I was openly identifying with her. It wasn't really her. It was, what if there's another girl around here that I'd like to rather be with? That's a fact.  But that's a fact. And I did that for some time. I never held her hand. Maria and I did not hold her. I did not hold her hand and I'm still to this day, I wasn't really openly affectionate. That's just a fact. But I began to think she wants me to hold her hand and yet at the same time I'd say, but if I hold her hand, especially at church, then any girls that might be available, seeing me holding hands with her, they may think that we got something going here and we really don't not yet. So I didn't hold her hand. For months it went on like that. One day we were in Fullerton. At Fullerton, J.C., I believe it was, there was a beauty contest that my cousin was in for Miss Fullerton. And so I invited Maria to go with me. And while we were there, my family was there. My cousin was there in performing in this and that, trying to win that particular incredible title. And Marie, I still remember, was wearing a red pantsuit. And Marie had long, her hair is actually naturally curly. And so her hair was just all curly and everything. And I was standing in the foyer waiting for her to come and there was this big old guy off to my left.  And when Marie came walking towards me, I still remember this guy looking at her with hungry eyes. And I'm thinking, do I want to die today? As I was looking, and then I looked at her. And then I looked back at him and he was following her as she was walking towards me and it hit me. He thinks she's good looking. I hadn't really thought about that. I'll be honest with you, I hadn't really thought about that. But I saw her through his eyes. So when she came walking up to me, I did something I didn't do. I walked up to her, she walked up to me. I took her by the hands. I pulled her close to me, put my arm around her waist. Bam! And I gave her a kiss. She has these big old eyes. She's looking at me like, what's that all about? And then I looked at Mr. Suave over there. What was I doing? I was marking my territory. Every man, you know what I mean. I was marking my territory. I was saying, she's mine, right? She's mine. I identified with her openly, committed myself openly. This is mine. And you know what? I learned a long time ago, that's what I have done with Jesus Christ. So I don't have a closet relationship with Jesus Christ. It's in the open. And that's what he says. You acknowledge me before men. You identify openly. You don't hide the fact. You don't become a chameleon. Oh, when you're with other Christians, oh, yeah, praise the Lord, God is good. But when you're in your college class, high school class, or with your family or friends who deny him, you don't say anything. You don't want to offend them, of course, and this and that. And what happens is, you get into the habit of denying him. But if you've got a relationship with Jesus Christ, it's to be open. It's to be known. And that's what he said.   There's a cost in denial. So a long time ago, as many of you came to realize that the Lord would have me to be open. And I'm open about my walk with God verbally. I speak about him. I openly will discuss him. I will share about him.  I will talk about the Lord. That's what you do. You speak openly about him. The Bible tells us in 1 John 4, 15, if anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the son of God, God lives in him and he and God, I am open to acknowledge that. And I do so when I share with other people the faith that I have in Christ. And also when I'm born again, my life is gonna demonstrate that I have a relationship with him. So it's not only my words, it is also my works. It's the way that I live. It's my lifestyle. So I actually have a living testimony of a relationship with God. A transformation for the Bible has said to us, if any man be in Christ is a new creation. Old things are passing away. Behold, all things are becoming new. And so you have your words that you speak concerning him when you share. You have your works that you perform, the lifestyle that you have that demonstrates that you have relationship with him. In 1 Thessalonians 4, verse one, Paul said it like this. Paul said, finally, dear brothers and sisters, we urge you in the name of the Lord Jesus to live in a way that pleases God as we have taught you. You are doing this already and we encourage you to do so more and more. So not only do I talk, but I also walk. You talk the talk and you walk the walk. And that's what he's speaking about if you're gonna affirm that you know him. And when you're open in this way, you're not ashamed of him. You're not hiding him under a basket, if you will. You're not ashamed to identify with him.  And I realize, of course, that it's getting worse and worse in the society that we live in that openly identifying with Jesus for some people is an embarrassment. You're in your college class, your professor makes fun of, sometimes will mock your faith. I know that as long as when I was in my mid-20s and I was going to secular college I still remember one of my professors in one of my sociology classes who introduced the class by asking the question, the first day of class, asking the question, how many of you are born again Christians? And out of the 25, 30 students, there were three or four of us who raised our hands. And we said, we're born again. Three or four of us out of the 25, 30. The first thing the professor said to us is I feel sorry for you. I pity you. And that's how he began our session and our season with him as a professor teaching us principles of sociology.  And yet you don't back down because it's true and you're not embarrassed of Jesus Christ. In Hebrews chapter two, verse 11, the writer of Hebrews said it like this. He said, both the one who makes men holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers. He's not ashamed of you. We shouldn't be ashamed of him. You see, as mentioned a moment ago, the result of denying Jesus is that he denies that person before his father who's in heaven. He had said in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew chapter seven, verse 23, he said, then I will declare to them, I never knew you. Depart from me, you who practice lawlessness. When Paul was writing to Timothy in second Timothy chapter two, verse 12, he said, if we deny him, he also will deny us. And so Jesus is speaking concerning the cost of discipleship. And he's been sharing some of the things that are related to that and has now come to what we call verse 34. And continuing has said, do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. When Jesus was born, it's interesting to note, and we just went through the Christmas holiday. Remember, when Jesus was born, the angels announcing to the shepherds said on earth peace, good will toward men. And yet we have Jesus here in verse 34 saying, do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. So somebody says, is that a contradiction? Is the Bible contradicting itself? What we need to know is that when the angels said on earth peace, good will toward men, they were not promising instant peace to everyone. What they were doing was announcing the incarnation of Christ. Luke was saying that the one who is peace has been born on earth. When you read the Bible and you look at the book of Ephesians, New Testament book written by the apostle Paul, and you look at chapter two verse 14, Ephesians two 14 makes it clear that Jesus himself is our peace. So peace was incarnated is what the angels are saying. Peace on earth is Jesus's incarnation. In order to have peace of any sort, then we receive the one who is peace incarnated. But here Jesus is making it clear that devotion to him often divides instead of uniting. And that's clearly evident in the world we live in today. We know this, many people don't have a problem celebrating holidays. They don't have a problem celebrating Christmas. What they have the problem with isn't the holiday. The problem is the message that's in that holiday. They want to believe, and I understand why they would, they want to believe that this is a season of good cheer and joy and rejoicing. This is a season where we give gifts to one another and celebrate with family gatherings. I understand all of that. But when you take the message seriously, that's when it causes problems because you can go to your Christmas party with your coworkers or you can go to your Christmas dinner at your family. And as long as, in some cases, as long as you don't make too much of an issue over the reason that you're gathering, as long as you don't start saying things like, you know what a great time it is to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ, the savior of the world. As long as it's just surrounding some meal and some fellowship around a table and teasing one another about family, things and all, everything's fine. But if you come on and you say, but I believe that Jesus Christ is the savior. I believe that he died on a cross. I believe he was buried. I believe he was resurrected from the dead. I believe he's coming again. Now you do that. You can create division there at that table.  I can become a real bad thing. But the Bible says that the birth of Christ was with a purpose. Remember what the angel said to the shepherds in the fields of Bethlehem in Luke 2, verse 11, there is born to you this day in the city of David a savior who is Christ the Lord. When Gabriel, the angel, appeared to Joseph in a dream, he told Joseph something about the birth of Jesus. In Matthew 1, 21, speaking of Mary, he said, she will bring forth a son.  That's Christmas. You will call him Jesus, Jehovah is salvation.  You see, only sinners need saviors. And that's not a message that is very popular for some. Jesus is saying when you actually believe that message and you proclaim that, then persecution and rejection will be part of the cost of following after him. He's made it clear that religious leaders and government, that society itself would be strongly in opposition to him, to his message, and to those who are proclaiming it. You see, when all of this is happening, when the government society and all religious leaders are turning against you, well, for some they'll say, well, at least I still have my family. But Jesus is making it clear that even our own families can and will reject us. Remember in verse 21 of chapter 10 here, how he had said, brother will deliver up brother to death, a father his child and children will rise up against parents and cause them to be put to death. He had already made it clear that coming to faith in Christ could divide families and not unite them. He says that in verse 35 here, I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. A man's foes will be those of his own household.   But not all people do that. There are some who will say, I like you better the other way. Like I've shared with you recently, a woman whose son came to faith in Christ here at this church called the office and said, my son has come to faith in Jesus Christ and I'm having problems with that. I could handle him as a druggy but I can't handle him as a Jesus freak. And that's how some people are. They don't know how to handle that kind of thing. They get upset over it. This person is changing.  How come you had to change the way that you have? And your family can turn against you. They can be divided. When he says, I've come to set a man against his father, that word against means to cut in two, to divide. It refers to complete and often permanent separation. Devotion for Jesus Christ can actually divide homes instead of uniting them. And so to be a disciple, you have to be willing to follow Christ even if your family not only refuses to but even begins to reject you. When Jesus was calling his men to be apostles, remember how it says it in Matthew chapter four verses 21 and 22, how that Matthew said, going on from there, he saw two other brothers, James the son of Zebedee and John his brother in the boat with Zebedee, their father, mending their nets. He called them and immediately they left the boat with their father and followed him. Jesus is worth following whatever the cost may be. There are those who resist faith in Christ because they know it's gonna cost them. When I was in the army, I had a friend named Rich. We called him Big Rich because he was big and he told me to. And I would share with him, he was my closest friend in the army and I would share with Rich about the word of God. I still remember, I was memorizing scripture and I would have him there in the room and I'd say, God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in him should not perish but have everlasting life. And I would share with him the gospel. There's none righteous, Rich, no, not one. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ. It's appointed unto men to die once and after this the judgment. And I would share with him. And I still remember and I'd say, Hebrews 927, John 316.  Book of Big Rich, chapter five, verse one. And I remember I was talking to my friend Rich and I would share with him quite often about what God could do in somebody's life and one day he finally said to me something that was very eye opening. He said, listen, David, he says, it's not that I disrespect your faith in Jesus Christ. I think it's a good thing that you have it. He says, I was raised by a mother who has a devotion to God. And he says, if I were to embrace the message as you proclaim it about being born again and all, he said, I'd be turning my back on my mom. And he said, I have to tell you something. My mom's a good woman and she has never lied to me. And if I come to faith in the Christ the way you are saying, I would be in essence saying, my mother is not a good woman. My mother lied to me. I cannot do that. I'll never forget that conversation. On another occasion I was speaking to somebody and I said to them, you need to get right with the Lord. And they said, I know. And I said, why haven't you? And he said to me, because my mom has raised me to believe certain things. And I said, but your mom's wrong about those things.  And he responded by saying, yes, I am.   I wanted to bring my mother to heaven. And if you get right with God, you'll have a great opportunity and potential to bring her to faith to Jesus Christ that she might go to heaven. But there are people, guys, and some of you understand exactly what I'm saying. There are people who say, I cannot and I will not lose the love of my family. And Jesus made it very clear. He said, there will be division when you come to faith in him. You need to be willing to follow Christ even if your father or your mother does not. It's not uncommon to lose your family, by the way. Many lose their families when they follow the Lord. The Psalmists in Psalm 69, verse eight, said it like this, even my own brothers pretend they don't know me. They treat me like a stranger. So some are going to completely and finally reject you when you follow the Lord Jesus Christ. But that's what he's calling us to. He's saying, even in your own home, there can be division. Entire family separated because of this one thing. You are following me. You see, he made it very clear as we read this that his followers will have hard times, but they are never left as orphans. Jesus in John 16, verse 33 said this. He said, I have told you these things so that in me, you may have peace. In the world, you will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world. Now, some families will divide, but some families can actually unite. As you already know, I got saved.  The family came to faith in Jesus Christ. You can win them to the Lord Jesus Christ. He goes on and he says to us in verse 38, he who does not take his cross and follow after me is not worthy of me. Now for us, we look at the cross now as a symbol of our faith. We need to put this comment in its context. When Jesus was speaking concerning bearing a cross, he was speaking to a group of people who knew that the cross was the implement of pain, torture, and death. They knew that because the Romans would use the cross to crucify and kill criminals. And so when you spoke about a cross to a Jew during the time of Christ, you were speaking about an implement of destruction and shame. It was something not to be identified with because it was a shameful thing to be crucified. And the thought of those who would die in the cross because when they died on crosses very often, if they were strong, they would not only die, but it would take two, sometimes three days. And they would be in such intense agony and pain over those days, they would be just up there on that cross naked before the world and they would put it in strategic places so that when people were passing by on the highway, they would see this man up there on a cross screaming insanely dying slowly. And so when Jesus said, pick up your cross and follow me, he was saying, this is an implement of self-destruction, be willing to identify with me even in the pain and humiliation of such a thing. That's the heart of following Christ, by the way. The cross represents absolute denial. It represents a full commitment to following Christ, no matter what the cost. To be a Christian isn't a Sunday morning thing alone. It's not a Wednesday night thing alone. It's a seven day, 24 hour day commitment to Christ. It's a forever relationship. It's not a part time, it's a full time. And Jesus said, pick up that cross and follow me. The cross speaks of being willing to endure shame. It speaks of being willing to endure pain to be his follower. And in the taken up of a cross, we're saying yes to the Lord, I will follow you. No matter what. Paul, when he was writing in Philippians chapter three, verse eight said this. He said, yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the priceless gain of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.  He says in verse 39, he who finds his life will lose it. He who loses his life for my sake will find it. Pursuing what we think produces life only ends up empty and devoid of satisfaction. The question is asked in the Old Testament book of Isaiah chapter 55, verse two, why do you spend money for what is not bread and your wages for what does not satisfy? Listen carefully to me and eat what is good. Let your soul delight itself in abundance. We've all heard of King Solomon, the wisest man of his day. King Solomon wrote many verses in scripture, books in scripture. One of the books that Solomon wrote was Ecclesiastes. And in the book of Ecclesiastes, he began to outline what his life was like. He began to share with us what he had attained. And he says in Ecclesiastes he had attained wisdom. He had the latest inventions. He had material wealth.  He had the pursuit of pleasure, great accomplishments. He had outward religious practices and absolute power. These are the things he had. These are the things that many people would like to have now, the latest gadget, a lot of money, a lot of sexual relationships. These are the things that people want today. And yet when he concluded the book of Ecclesiastes, he summed it up like this in chapter 12 verses 13 and 14. He said, let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter. Fear God, keep his commandments, for this is man's all, for God will bring every work into judgment, including every secret thing, whether good or evil, everything. When I was a young boy growing up, I felt that what I really needed to make me completely whole would be a relationship with a young girl or a young woman as I was growing older, a girl or a young woman, that's what I thought. I thought that if I had somebody who would love me, somebody who I could have a relationship with, who could love me, that my life would be complete. And I was a romantic, I was a romantic kid, man. I mean, I think when I was born that I proposed to the nurse who attended my birth and it got worse from there. The first girl I ever asked to marry me was Bernadette. Bernadette Archuleta, I was four years old. I was in love with Sandy Martinez when I was six. I mean, there were girl after girl after girl in my life. Oh, you know, ooh. And I wanted a relationship, you know, Linda Lane, and I can name these crushes I had as a young boy into young adulthood. I mean, by the time I was in my teens, you know, any girl that would talk to me on the phone was a candidate to be my wife, 14, 15, 16. And I began to realize that I had this hunger for relationship and all. And there was just nobody who would put up with me very long. They just didn't want to be mine forever. And so what happened is I started thinking that that I just, I needed this so badly that it became the only thing in my mind for the longest time and eventually I came to realize that that wasn't going to be the answer. And so when I turned in my early twenties, I, it's about 23 or 24, somewhere in there, I began to realize that there's something wrong with me. I had gotten saved and I'd go to the Bible studies and the young girl would walk in, that little hippie girl with the long hair and I'd read the Bible. If you ask anything in my name, I will do it. And I heard something about claiming, claiming that promise and say, here she comes. Here Jesus, there she is. I claim her in your mighty name. And then she'd buzz on by me and wouldn't even look at me. I'd say, well, you know, what am I gonna do? And I would, I really had this longing. I could go into it, you're not that interested but I will share a little bit. And finally one day I prayed and said, Lord, put me to sleep to my desires. Lord, I am pursuing relationships with people and I'm not pursuing my relationship to you. You put Adam to sleep to his obvious needs. You knew what he needed before he did. But your word tells me that you put him to sleep. And then you brought Eve to him. Lord, I'm asking in Jesus' name that you would do the same for me because I am so busy thinking that a woman is gonna fulfill those deepest recesses of my heart that I'm missing out on you. You can think that a relationship with somebody special will make you the complete person you want to be. I'm here to tell you that that's not true.  And that's what I discovered because I said, Lord, may I be asleep to my desires and let me just serve you. May I seek ye first in your kingdom and your righteousness. And all of these things shall be added unto me.  So I wanna delight myself in you. And that's how it came about that one day, a young woman came to a Bible study that I was teaching in the city of Ontario. And that's how it came about that I met this girl at a Bible study. She didn't come the next week. She came the following week, my sister Madeleine led her to Christ. And then a couple months later, we went out on a date and we haven't been apart since because I was dead to my desires and God said, now you're ready. You're now responsible enough. It took years for him, by the way, I should go a little further and say this. It took years for me to realize how important that woman's love is because I needed to learn balance in relationship. I didn't tell my girlfriend who became my wife, Marie. I did not tell her that I loved her. I never used those words. You see, because when I was with other girls, that was the first thing that would come out of my mouth. Well, I love you. So I wasn't that way. I wouldn't, she would call me at work and she'd say blah, blah, and I'd say blah, blah, and then she'd say, I'll hang up now and I'd say, cool, and she'd say, I love you. And I'd say, yeah. And she'd say, say it back. And I'd say, you know. And she'd say, say it or I won't hang up. And my boss who had been married 25 years would turn to me and he'd say, just say you love her. She'll never hang up. But I didn't do that. I didn't use those words. I, you know, this may or may not be something that I should even share with you, but I just, those were not, that was not me. That's not how I am. I am not open with my emotions. You guys don't know me that way, do you? I'm not open with my emotions. They're very closed. There are only certain people can know them and God can only know everything. So I would not tell my girlfriend who became my wife. I didn't kiss Marie for five months. I didn't hold her hand for three. We are not that romantic couple. You know, we walk on the beach in slow motion with birds over us and waves. We're not those people. We just aren't. That's not me. You know, I love her. I tell her, she knows that, but I had to learn to do that. And let me give you one more thing about how the Lord does complete you and how he shows you how he uses people to, but they are not the ones that complete you. He is the one, but he brings somebody into your life to help you understand that that's what a helper is who is suitable for all your needs. And that is this. We were married. Marie is about to give birth to our firstborn child. I'm making minimum wage. I'm unable to provide for my family. I had to quit school because I couldn't afford to go to college anymore. And I was not the man who could show emotion. Believe it or not, I mean, I'm very emotional now. You guys think that, but that's not me. I couldn't show emotion. I kept it to myself. It was always within me. I would not share what I felt unless I drank. When I drank, you'd know my anger that I could be angry, or I might think I'm in love because I'm drunk. Baby, I love you. You're everything to me. But you ever go out?  I mean, it could be like that. I'm unable to pay my bills for school. I quit school. And there I am at home thinking my little apartment in Roland Heights.  What a failure. Can't even provide for a family. A family that's growing. You live in an apartment in Roland Heights. $175 a month of rent and you're barely making it. Making minimum wage. I didn't know how to show emotion so I went to the store and I went and bought some beer. I brought it back. Marie was making dinner and I started drinking. I went and bought some more. Started drinking some more. Before you know it, I'm getting a little bit high from the alcohol. She's never seen me that way. This is a woman who came to faith in Christ through my ministry. She only knew me as a Bible teacher really. She didn't know me, the old David, the way David was, the way David would be when he drank, the way David was when alcohol was consuming his life. I was an alcoholic. She didn't know me that way. She only knew the Christian David. And I wasn't a perfect kid. I was a young kid when we met. I wasn't a good man. Like I said, I was a real affectionate. I wasn't what God can make you into later. I was that at that point. And I've got all these tears in my heart and I don't know how to deal with it and I don't want to tell her.  We didn't even have money to buy a bed. We had a fold out bed of one of those couches that turned into a bed and I'm laying down on this bed and I finally just release and I start to cry and I'm crying so hard that I take the pillow and I put it over my face and I'm crying into the pillow with a broken heart. And I hear the sounds of her footsteps as they're stepping up the stairs until the door opens up and the light shines in and she's standing at the door looking down at me and she says, what's wrong? And I wouldn't speak to her so she comes walking and sits next to me on my left side. I still remember that and she sits next to me and she says to me, David, what's wrong? I compose myself and I, in between sobs, say to her, you made a mistake. You made a mistake. You married the wrong man. You deserve better than you got. I can't even make more than $3 an hour. I can barely pay for this apartment. I had to quit school because I can't afford the tuition.  You deserved more than what you got. And I wept and I wept. Some of you men know what I'm saying. I wept and I said, I'm a failure. I am a failure. You made a mistake. I am so sorry for you. This is a little girl in her early 20s.   I still remember her rocking me, holding me and saying to me as I'm weeping and sobbing. And I'm saying, I wanna be a pastor, but I can't show my emotions. I wanna be a pastor. I go to Bible college, teach Bible studies, look at me, look at me. I can't even share what's on my heart. Look at me. She rocks me in her arms. She says, you're not a failure. I believe in you.   And from there, so yes, my completeness is Christ. Yes, he brings somebody who's just right for you. He brought this woman into my life because she spoke into my heart the things that he would have had me to know. And she was the voice he used. God can work in you too. You see, relationships are not going to fulfill you outside of the first relationship and that's Christ. Your family may say, I want nothing to do with you and sometimes that happens. Not all people will do that in your family. Some will embrace Christ by faith. But the bottom line is, is that there is a cost involved when you make that decision and you begin to say, I'm gonna lose my life. The things that I think are most important, I'm gonna leave those things behind so that the things that matter can take the forefront. He who finds his life, verse 39, will lose it. He who loses his life for my sake will find it. He who receives, you receives me. He who receives me receives him who sent me. He who receives a prophet in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward. He who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man shall receive a righteous man's reward. Whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of water in the name of a disciple, assuredly I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward. And so as you go out and you take the message, the people who are receiving the message in effect are actually receiving Christ. And when you receive Christ, you're actually receiving the one who sent Christ and that's how you connect with God. You have relationship with God through Jesus Christ who's the way, the truth and the life. In Luke 9.48, he said to them, whoever welcomes this little child in my name welcomes me. Whoever welcomes me welcomes the one who sent me. And then finally in verses 41 and 42, speaking about receiving a prophet in the name of a prophet, receiving a prophet's reward, God will reward those who receive his people from prophet to what he refers to as a righteous man. And any service done to any of his people results in a shared reward. I have a friend, his name is George Adams. George writes me every year. George is the one who when Arthur Blessed said, if you're afraid to stand by yourself, perhaps a friend will stand with you. It was George who reached over and touched my shoulder and said to me, if you want to stand, I will stand with you. And it was through the encouragement of my friend George that I actually stood and gave my heart to Christ that day, December 27th, 1970. And so George every year will write me. Every year he wrote me just last week and he said, Dave, I want you to know that I remember it's your spiritual birthday and I just want you to know I love you, my brother. And I write him and I tell him, George, whatever God has done in my life, you receive a share of that reward. You receive a share. You tapped me on the shoulder and said you would stand with me. But any accomplishments in the kingdom of God that I have, a portion goes to you. That's a fact. That's what the Lord is teaching here. He who receives a profit in the name of a prophet shall receive a prophet's reward. He who receives a righteous man in the name of a righteous man will receive a righteous man's reward. You have a share of whatever reward the Lord may give to me. That is being given to you also. And finally, he speaks in this way, verse 42, whoever gives one of these little ones only a cup of water in the name of a disciple assuredly I say to you, he shall by no means lose his reward. Little ones, there are no insignificant or unimportant disciples. You may not have a home Bible study. You may not be leading in any church functions. You may not have the kinds of things that other people would notice. But you are not insignificant. You are not insignificant. The enemy would whisper in your ear that you don't matter.  That's not true. There is no insignificant person in the body of Christ, every one of you matter to Jesus Christ. Every one of you do.  You would probably say, none. I would like to keep them all. Oh, but that little one, I mean what good is that little one? I mean you still got three others and a thumb, I mean you can do all kinds of things. No, I'd like to keep them all, thank you very much. So what portion of your body do you want to give up? What portion of your body, outside of the fat? What portion of the body do you want to give up? Nothing, I'll keep it all. Why? Because it matters. In the body of Christ, you matter. Never forget that. Because the enemy beat me down with that one. You're nothing, you mean nothing. Nobody notices when you're not there.  I have heard that all of my life. And the enemy has whispered that into my heart, all of my life. That's one of the reasons I wanted a woman to love me, at least one person would. And then God said, no, I love you. And that's all that matters. If it's you and me, that's all that matters. This may not make sense to you, to some it doesn't, I understand. But if you can grab hold of that today, your life will change. Your life will change.  You matter.  You matter so much that he gave up the splendors of heaven knowing that his destiny was a lonely hill called Golgotha, where he laid down his life. For me, you matter. Don't forget it.  You are useful in the hand of God.   And don't be surprised when the enemy begins to mount an attack against you, when people don't like you, when they cast out your name as being evil, when your family says, what happened to you?  Jesus Christ is coming for you and be ready and be used by God. There's not enough time. We've got to go out and do what we can do. You are not insignificant. And I, again, I'm not Mr. Positive. Fact of the matter is, I think that God wants to do an awful lot more than what he's able to do with us sometimes. I know he does. But can you imagine as the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the earth just so that you can find one man who's completely his so that he might show himself strong on his behalf? How about you becoming that person today? How about you saying, God, here am I, send me. Here am I, use me. Here am I, I'm available. I want to be used by you. Why not you? Listen, one last thing. I'm 20 years old. I'm a drunk. I'm a doper. I'm a hippie. I didn't like to read anymore. I only liked to drink. And I liked to smoke pot. 45 years ago, God stepped in and said, I got plans for you, son. I'm going to use you for my glory. And yes, we've had some down times. Yeah, I've had some rough times. Yes, there were sins that God had to work and clean in my life. But every day with Jesus has been worth it. Every moment with Jesus Christ has been worth it. And God can take the trash and make it into a treasure. He can use you. Don't forget that. Please, God can use you.


Okay, I am. We're live on YouTube. Going live. All right, we're live. Hello. Welcome tonight we're going to give it a few minutes for the room to fill up. Hello everyone. Give it just a moment. I'm going to put a link into the chat box for tonight's document. And I'm going to put a link to. A great map you can use to see what land you are staying on. Welcome everybody. We're going to give it just one more moment before we. Get started with library news and info. Welcome everyone. All right, we're going to jump in with some library news first before we jump into our presentation with the prisoners literature project. So we thank you all for being here tonight and joining us for this presentation. I've admired the prisoners literature project for a long time. So I'm super happy that this is part of our one city one book and I could bring them in to talk about the work that they are doing. So our one city one book, our 17th one city one book is this is your hustle. Unflinching stories of everyday prison life by Niger poor and Erlon Woods. And you should pick up this book right now if you have not already read it you can pick it up at one of our 28 locations or book mobile, or get it instantly on all of those resources that are available out there. So I just want to quickly tell you about some other upcoming events. So there is the link to the one city one book but first, let's acknowledge that we occupy the unseated an ancestral homeland of the raw nutrition lonely peoples for the original inhabitants of the San Francisco peninsula. We recognize that we benefit from working and living on their traditional homeland as uninvited guests we affirm their sovereign rights as first peoples and wish to pay our respects to the ancestors, elders, and relatives of the raw nutrition community. And a big shout out to our Oakland organization sagorate land trust, who is doing amazing work and all women run organization in the land back movement check them out.  And I just put a link into some other reading lists that you can find about first person culture and other great stuff. So as I mentioned this is part of our one city one book campaign. And I'm just going to highlight some upcoming events that I'd love for you to show up to. These are in person I know gathering is still kind of weird, but it is also still kind of great. So come join us this Saturday, where we will be hosting the amazing pindarvis harsha from KQAD, along with Brandon to seek, and they'll be in combo with Nigel and Erlon, and they're going to be talking about pindarvis and Brandon's project on fundraising life. And they did a photographic and essay project, where they featured eight folks who are experiencing reentry after a life sentence, and joining the conversation will be Lynn Acosta, one of the subjects I'm super excited to have her come these are the kind of programs that really I love make me love my job because we get to pay to have this person come out I'm just so excited, putting her up in a hotel, have a party after not party like a gathering after the event and everyone's welcome to come. It's going to be empanadas and we're going to check out the gallery so come check out this event this Saturday. Sunday we're going to be featuring a film called he had wings featuring the work of the amazing Ronnie Goodman, also formerly incarcerated, and then unhoused artist and unfortunately passed away not too long ago. He in 2020. He was a big library supporter and we loved him. And then there's so many more events. I'm just going to really breeze through these just so you know what we have coming up. Another in person event December 10 of film about the legacy of new college law school. But December 11 Sunday December 11 2pm main library. The amazing Sarah Cruz on and Corey Thomas in Convo about Sarah's book I cried to dream again. And this book is about it's her memoir, she spent over two decades inside for the murder of her abuser. And she is amazing. Her book is amazing. She also is featured in two episodes of your hustle. So scope is out one is called dirty water and dirty water actually comes up in the book to so there's a really great connection check out the book. Please come here Sarah she's just power. And last two events so please we got a lot going on. But now, let's hear about the prisoners literature project. The prisoners literature project is an all inclusive all volunteer grassroots nonprofit. This purpose is to encourage reading the pursuit of knowledge and self determination among incarcerated folks by sending free reading materials to those behind bars PLP aims to foster learning and critical thinking and help prepare people to lead a successful life after incarceration. We believe they believe that all people have a right to read what we have the same mission. And that's why I love them. So tonight from the PLP, we have Jamie, Brita and Ali, and I'm going to stop sharing and turn it over. Hi everyone. So, we'll do a couple intros and then we have a short presentation to share with y'all, and we'll have plenty of time for questions and answers at the end. My name is Jamie Schecter, I use she her pronoun, and I've been volunteering with the prisoners literature project for about eight years or so at this point. I do some of the behind the scenes work around event organizing bookstore partnerships and every now and again I still get to go in and answer letters directly. I'll pass it to Brita because she's next to my screen. Oh, you gotta unmute Brita. Thank you. Hi, Jamie. Hi everybody. I'm Brita. I do a variety of things at the PLP I help manage the volunteers help run in person book packing sessions sometimes. I help with our newsletter and fundraising and I help stock books and I just do a lot of cool awesome stuff. That was what I was what I needed to say I'll pass to Ali. And they pronouns and then. Yeah, I've been volunteering with PLP since gosh 2018 started off just kind of volunteering at sessions. And then shortly before the pandemic was like coordinating some sessions and then during the pandemic took on more responsibilities and like sorting our letters and I'll get into like, how we receive letters where they're coming from and kind of all things letters later in the presentation. But that's me. Cool. I'm gonna start sharing my screen. And thank you. Give me some thumbs up if folks can see it. Great. Thank you, Ali. And so, thank you to the San Francisco Public Library for inviting us here. We're with the prisoners literature project and I thought I don't have to remember our entire mission because it was just for that. But what is the PLP. We were founded over 35 years ago by left as organizers, and we originally gather that found together books in San Francisco. And they are still one of our best partners to this day, where they help us receive letters and donate books to us and fundraise for us. We're entirely volunteer operated. Everybody volunteering the PLP believes that people have the right to read. And we do this because in the US, most prisons, nearly all of them do not allow prisoners to receive books directly from individuals. So generally speaking, you can't just send a book to a friend or family member who's incarcerated, you have to go through a vendor. And as an approved vendor for most facilities, the PLP ships thousands of books to prisons across the country every single year. And access to books is important because it offers incarcerated people entertainment education and connection to the outside world. So kind of at a high level, what do we do. People who are incarcerated writers letters, they hear about us from resources they might be getting all inside from word of mouth from friends and family on the outside, however they hear about us and get our address they write us letters. So we have volunteers who read every letter and review every letter and pick books for them in from our library that we have in Berkeley, and we make sure to include resources and a little note on every package that we're allowed to. We then package them up and mail books, and about 60 weeks after you get you send us your letter you're getting books usually. And we spread that information we should we really encourage everybody who's receiving packages from us to let people know about us where we've been lucky to be able to grow with the rate of growth we've seen in letters. So we haven't slipped behind that 60 week mark in a quite a while.  Prisoner's Literature Project is one of the oldest and largest books to prisons programs in the country. We answer book requests from incarcerated people costing entire United States, we've been operating for about 40 years, we're all volunteer, we respond to about 1000 requests a month. It's just great partnership with the independent bookstores who will actually have a display in the bookstore. Would you like to buy this book for a prisoner. You know, high quality, usually new books that we have a hard time getting hold of, and it's just been so incredibly successful we get hundreds, thousands of books. For us as volunteers, the letters come in and that's kind of where the process starts. So if I just picking up a letter. It's always really heartwarming to read the letters because they always seem very, very grateful, and it's kind of a humbling experience. There's this one guy that wrote and he talked about how he doesn't have any family outside of prison and the process of getting a book is nice but also just having someone write to you makes you feel good about getting to talk to people that don't have people outside of prison to talk to. Thank you so much for the literature project. Thank you so much for the origami books and the colony books who appreciate everything you do for us. I'm writing you because I have one more request and then that will be for a few months, and having a difficult time learning how to draw, but I'm not giving up. So I really need drawing book for beginners. So we have books on how to learn to draw here in the room and you would have the restrictions, we have information about all the restrictions for every facility of the United States, pick up the books from here in the book room. And then we write a little note, sometimes that's the only mail they're going to receive your viewers along. And then we, you know, attack it up and send it out. There's lots of other volunteer work happening to get the books here to solicit donations to source books from people and places all around the country to help us do the work that we do. And now we're going to pass it on to Ali and pick up the next part. Let me know when you want me to move slides. Great. Yeah, we'll start here. Yeah, like Jamie said, most prisons, like almost all prisons do not allow individuals to just like nobody in prison is allowed to just kind of receive books from individuals. And you might be thinking like that prisons have fully stocked libraries and that everything is ready to go. That is also not the case prison libraries have been defunded but also another huge issue is the fact that prisons, both on the individual and sometimes even like the county or state level are censoring what incarcerated people can read. And so there have been a lot of kind of just like moments where this comes up in the news or where it's touched upon, like kind of mass book bans and prisons across the US. Like this article on the left that we have a screenshot of is from 2020 and kind of talks about what was happening in Illinois and eventually censorship got passed to like a like a central committee so that no one prison could decide what books got banned. But overall, like a lot of the time you see disproportionately it's books that are talking about things like rates or things like class or incarceration or books that are touching on the issues that a lot of incarcerated people have experienced or like have lived with. And so it's really a huge issue and part of what makes a specialist that we're where we send as close as we can what people are asking for. And so when people write us those letters they go to bound together books our bookstore partner. And the reason it goes all those letters go to a bookstore and not directly to us is because most prisons again don't allow books from just like a random organization we have to go through a bookstore. And so yeah I could go the next slide Jamie. When we get those letters. One of the first things a volunteer does with the letter is look to see where the letter is from, and then checks in our giant binder like we have a binder I would say like this huge of restrictions. Most, if not all prisons have restrictions and they are not consistent across federal state or local prisons and jails. Even like if you might think like California State prisons for instance you see like vastly different standards between between prison summer like we will only let you send in two books at a time maximum. Or five max but they all have to be brand new they need to have like stickers or prices still attached to them somehow. In places. Ban things such as like nudity or ban, like Black Panthers for instance or ban talk of like Black Power. Some ban foreign languages some ban anything that refers to like a code or hidden message. We've had how to books get sent back to us with like letters saying this isn't an allowed material. Like, teaches someone how to do electrical work and that could be used like to disrupt to disrupt the life here in prison. And so there are a lot of reasons and it also, it's incredibly arbitrary. In that it might just be the person working in the middle of that day might be the correctional officer that's working in the middle of that day that makes the call on this. So it's not really standardized and a good example of this is recently with a county jail system. I know with the city, a city jail system. We like had correctional officers saying for months and months and months that we couldn't send any books and they're like no, you're not approved you're not allowed. We finally got in touch with the warden of that system and she was like, Oh, that's interesting no you're definitely allowed please let me know and like, will you're allowed to send books and so again it's incredibly arbitrary. And we run into issues like this a lot we're just one of us. Like one or two of us volunteers will just spend our time on hold for hours to call and kind of try to get in and see what we are allowed to send, because we always want to do as much as we can. But yeah, so we do track. Thanks, I see the well, we do track a lot of really arbitrary guidelines. And a huge way that we're getting word of these, these restrictions and guidelines is actually from the people who are asking for books from us. So some of them will send us the paperwork and be like my books got denied. This is what happened this is what they said and they'll just send the same form to us, which is incredibly helpful. And then we'll call and follow up. But yeah, some of the other examples of things have gotten banned. That kind of our wackiest one off case is a girl with a dragon tattoo one prison bandit and you think there's like an interesting story or something there but it's literally just that it talks about a tattoo. And the restrictions are like no tattoos. These are great questions. Do we get notified when restrictions change, not by institutions. No. Usually, if we are notified it's an incarcerated person sending us hey my books got rejected for this reason did you know you can't send this anymore.  Can you please let us know. The other question I saw was what happens to rejected books they get repackaged if they get back to us they get repackaged if they're held by the correctional facility they are there they're lost to us. But if they get returned in the mail or returned by the facility via mail that they get repackaged and recent out by us. All right, you can go the next one gene. So something else that has been really valuable tests and organizations the fact that we are not the only organization doing this work. When we talk about fighting censorship, we have like a large, I guess not coalition but there, there are a lot of us like books to prisoners groups on a list or together. And so there we have a lot of email friends of just like hey this got rejected anyone have experience with this to like, who's getting rejected from Wisconsin what's happening here. And so it's really nice to have that network. We as an organization like exchange letters with the prison book program in Quincy, Massachusetts like they can't get into California prisons so when they get requests for California they send them to us. And then should we have like a weird northeastern prison that we can send to we send them those letters. Similarly, we send the, all of our Texas letters we send to the inside books group in Texas and Austin, because they're able to access Texas prisons, and we at the moment are not. So we do have a lot of partner organizations and a lot of relationships with other books to prisoners programs. So if you know any, any people in any of these areas for instance, encourage them to get involved with our partner organizations. Let's go to the next slide. And then the last kind of big issue we're facing, like which is also I would say kind of a censorship issue is the fact that a lot of prisons are moving to tablets. And so what you'll see is like in Pennsylvania, for instance, and all of their state prisons. Now, like have to pay money for time on tablets to read things and to access things and they're like oh yeah well you have these books like there's a small library on there. It's not a very big library there's not a lot of like resources or things on there and like say for instance I know one issue that comes up is that people who are spiritual or religious and are looking for resources and things like Buddhism or like looking for Quran or for like readings on in Wicca like aren't able to access those things via the tablet system, and they're spending money on it. And so that's something that is happening slowly in a couple different states, Pennsylvania it's already happening in Wisconsin I think they're trying to move to that. So instead now all letters like that gets sent as correspondence have to go to one address, and that's just like letters like notes forms all those things, those get scanned. People in those prisons affected by this do not like get their loved ones letters for instance or do not get like the physical paper. They're only getting a scan of it. And so when we send our like invoices and write a little note on the back sometimes we're not sure if the note gets in like we're not sure if the invoice makes it to the person. So we get the note and we hope the best. And then the physical books we send go to a separate address. And so these states, like the way we do them we separate them out from the general pile so that there's no confusion and we're able to kind of offer the same quality of service in, like, for those states as well but making sure everything's getting to the right address everyone's really clear on like which of the two addresses they're sending to. And those really tie things up, especially because Wisconsin is trying to move to that system so for instance like we'll get, we'll get letters back, and they're like you wrote this to the wrong address. And we're like we're pretty sure it's the right one they're like no. And so it's, it sounds like a long and frustrating process and that's because it is and it's definitely worth it right and we want to be able to provide these resources. It's incredible when you think about the barriers and, you know, you wish you wish every prison had like the Shawshank Redemption Library and that's just not the case. I believe that's it for my slides so I'm going to pass it to Britta. Thanks Ali. My slide is about why we send books to incarcerated people and one thing that I'm going to focus on is how we know that we get books to folks because they write back. It's beautiful artwork and really evocative thank you letters. And, you know, there are a lot of us behind the scenes doing various things and we sort of mentioned this a little bit earlier but we all do this for the same reason even if we come from super different backgrounds or maybe have like slightly different politics like we just really think that everybody has the right to read. And that makes sense to a lot of people and that really, that brings a lot of really cool people together to do this. When we do this as we've been doing this for so long, we get this really great, get really great feedback from folks who get our books, we get our notes. You know, we hear from a lot of people that we send books to, you know, sometimes it's the only mail that they get that's handwritten. And I know that's mentioned in the video but I really think it's important to touch on it a lot because sometimes they'll send us sort of general thank yous and sometimes they'll write back to individual folks that have written to them and say, you know, you really nailed it, you picked out great books for me, thank you, like this is meaningful. And I didn't actually know that when I got in, first got involved so it was kind of a surprise the first time I got a letter back like I was, it was, it was shocking, it's still shocking, you know, someone takes the time to write me back and say like, thank you. And it's just, it's just really cool, you know, sometimes at our, in our book packing sessions that we have in person, we will, or at least I don't know if everybody does this but I do this we get like a really cool thank you letter during the session that comes up in the pile. And we'll just read it, you know, like just everybody just like hey, I got this really great feedback from somebody, we sent them something really good. You know, and it just kind of keeps everybody in the headspace of like this is this is why we're doing what we're doing. So, you can see some other artwork here there's more on our website, prisonlit.org should feel free to check it out we post new stuff all the time. There on social media. So, I will request the next slide Jamie. Thank you. So how can you get involved. Well, there are lots of ways. You can, if you know folks who are incarcerated. You can tell them about us. If we are not one of the organizations that consent to them we can still give them information about the other organizations. But there's a there's a little drop down menu on our website on prisonlit.org and it says request books I believe, and there's a handout you can mail full you can also hand copy down the directions from there it's pretty pretty well laid out in terms of like what has to write to specific address. There's a little bit of a time lag that Jamie mentioned, and then focus books. So it's pretty simple. You can come volunteer with us we are running in person bookpacking sessions. You know we still have good COVID protocols, and we keep our sessions kind of small, and it's a time to work together with other folks and often it's it's really cool because, again, like a lot of us come from really, really different backgrounds and we have different understanding was of books and literature and so you get a letter that maybe you're not super familiar with you know maybe you're not somebody who reads a lot of thrillers. And the person who's written it is like, I really want these types of crime books, somebody else in the room is going to know same you know with any other section so it's a collaborative thing it's it's very cool. At this point, a pretty long wait list. So if you'd like to come volunteer with us, you're going to have to wait a little bit, and we appreciate your patience. There's a form on our website you can fill it out you tell us a little bit about yourself about your availability. And we'll do our best to get back to you as soon as possible, we do get back to everybody in one way or another. You can another thing you can do to help us out you can donate. Obviously, we love your cash donations because our postage fees are extraordinarily high. I don't think we touched on this yet, but we, our main cost is is postage, you know every package. Let's say there's three to five books in there. Let's say it's you know around three pounds of about four bucks a package. We answer there about 1000 letters a month. I know that math is living somewhere I think Ali probably even knows it off the top of their head. It's a lot. So cash donations actually really go a long way because we're all volunteers nobody's getting a salary nobody can pay for this. We just we do it because we want to do it. If you're asked, you can also donate books, we should come back to that at the end I think that's a nice little side item to pick up at the end. But another way that you can donate books is that you can go to our online wish lists and you can buy them directly for us. Those are also on our linked on our website. A few of our bookstore partners also have in store displays and this is one way that folks sometimes come into volunteering with us is that they see a PLP display and this just clicks and they get it and they start packing books too. You can follow us on social media, which I know everybody says, in our case, that means that occasionally you can find out when some of us might show up in person somewhere at a book festival, maybe a talk like this. You can find out what books were sending out what's what's in demand you can see some of those thank you letters we try to post those. You know, just, even if you're just kind of like casually curious and you want to just like keep it on your radar. You can also keep learning about the US legal system. And I feel like the thing to say here is one way into that is to read the ear hustle book, which is great. And I know a lot of people have come, like it sort of into these things more through that I mean people at PLP. I've had that experience. And the books really great. So yeah, I'm ready yet. There's a lot of copies floating around right now it's pretty pretty good time to grab one. What else do we have Jamie do I have another slide. Some of the same stuff. Those are some of our bookstore partners that have the nice in store displays for us or run the online wish lists. There's some of our social media handles. And I think we went really quickly but now we have a lot of time for questions. And thanks. Thanks, Anissa for keeping us all dialed in behind the screen. I'm going to open this little chat and see what folks have been saying because I've just been talking. And I'll go ahead and start sharing so we can kind of see each other. I think Jean oh had a question about children's books. You know wants to take that one. Do we send children's books or books to people who are learning to read. Yeah, so we do have quite a good selection of easy reader books that are usually middle grade to YA for folks who are trying to basically get better literacy skills and learn to read a little bit more. And I think we've even started stacking a few specifically children's books so that incarcerated parents can, we've gotten a couple of requests from incarcerated parents who want to be able to read with their child, one way or another. So we do. And this one from Andre says I'm curious what dress you spend your time with this organization and how long have you been doing this. I'm happy to step in for this one. And when Brita, when Brita was like you know keep us in the back of your mind. I kind of want to share I first like ran into PLP at a book festival and like bought some books from them at a book sale and then like, you know didn't volunteer for until like a year and a half after that. They're here. And like I had an AmeriCorps job and like it volunteer hours counted as service and so I started volunteering but yeah one way or another I found my way in. But yeah, for me, I guess, like I like feeling like I am just objectively being like of service in a way. It's hard in like I guess our current kind of stated things I know some of us like regardless of where we are politically or just kind of in our lives like sometimes you feel that feeling of hopelessness and you want to connect with people and I'm like this objectively is like books from my hands into someone else's hands right. And so that that to me feels powerful and I know it feels powerful to me it probably feels really powerful to receive those books as well. So that that's it for me but I'll pass it to others who want to answer that. I kind of have an AmeriCorps connection with it too. Before I was living in the Bay I was in Seattle and I was doing volunteer coordination with AmeriCorps. And I checked out their books to prisoners group up there to see that could be an opportunity for us and when I moved back I was like, Oh, I know I'm pretty sure Berkeley has a group to and I just I showed up I'm a reader I love to read it's like book shopping but without costing me any money. So that was just the fun kind of way to get plugged in and then I kind of got hooked and I've been doing it for about eight years, really what brought you in. I was going to say I don't know if I need to touch on that or not. You know, I guess I'll say something general and I'll say something personal I think the thing I always say is that a lot of folks come to PLP from, I know I keep saying different backgrounds but what I mean is that some of our one one thing that I mean is that some of us are impacted by incarceration in our lives or, you know, our loved ones ourselves. Some of us work in the legal system. And so that impacts how we think about this sort of stuff.  The book thing kind of overlaps with like this seeming like a good fit for like being useful and like a good fit for like the way that you think about like your role as like a civic participant right like so there's there's sort of all this stuff going on. For me, you know, I guess I can say one thing I will say is that, you know, I am basically able at any time to go get the books that I want to read, and I think about that a lot and I think about how. Normally do we live in the Bay Area where we have, you know, wild, incredible libraries and bookstores, but like I am a person that has the means to find them and get them and. And I think about how much that has impacted my entire life. And so that's so not being able to have in addition to having all kinds of other things, sort of limiting my ability to be in the world like I just sort of think about that as as one way that I do this one reason that I do this because I just don't take it for granted you know so. Yeah, I'm looking at these questions to. Yeah, are there any private foundations of support the work of PLP. Yeah. I can speak to that a little. So I write really nice thank you letters to some of our foundation partners, who we don't actively solicit. I guess that's the other thing to say about donations is that we don't go out. We don't like do grant proposals at all. So any money that comes in is because somebody found out about us the organization of the individual and they decided to support what we do. It's just pretty incredible. And it so far works really well. And there are a couple of foundations. It's on our. I think it's on the donate page at the, on our website, some of our bigger donors are on there individuals and organizations that help us out year over year we sort of change it every year so folks can see who's involved. I used to volunteer at 2022 Blake Street which is grassroots house which we used to share with other community organizations and we still run space at. And before that at the epicenter it's a shop nice. Could you talk about the move to the new space can people just drop in during meeting hours. I was probably the least involved with the move so if you all. Yeah, we moved. And so I'm going to be in the back of the house of street from grassroots house if you know where that is in Berkeley on Blake. At our new location which is 2025 Blake. It's like it's smaller than grassroots house but it's a bigger space for us and like the library and the place where we write letters are no longer like separate by a hallway. And it's all our space, like it's our own little, little place, which is really great we don't need like an extra storage unit anymore. We still keep space at grassroots house for some storage so it's nice and close. We're to like drop in during session hours. You could totally like walk by we've got some stuff up in the windows like come and say hi, as long as you are masked but in terms of like joining to volunteer. We don't do drop in any more it's sign up only with like a volunteer database and especially just with like how many people want to volunteer and still kind of try to maintain COVID safety for folks. We are doing sign ups online. Next question I assume you send books to women's and men's prisons yes. We also like sometimes. I guess, like we send to anything where people are incarcerated like even at like the smallest county level where sometimes we have like a deputy writing in and being like there are no books here and people are bored and we are all locked down like. Is there any way you could say like people are asking for these types of books. It's a great detention center as well right. Yeah, I believe so. Yeah. Like I think I could be wrong I think we said to like at Atlanta which was in the news a couple years ago. Yeah, thank you. He asks us if there are any book club or discussion groups guided by the volunteers, and I would like to say that there are not that that is an aspiration of some of us. We just are doing a lot of other stuff. And haven't really ever put that together. We have a couple of folks who volunteer in prison separately from the PLP, and we've got folks who are prison librarians, folks that teach classes and do things like book club so there's a lot of great overlap between librarians and our work and teachers and our work. I think there are some people who write in and in the request they're like hey we're forming a book club could we possibly like, and they ask for like a pretty easy to get a hold of book they're like hey can we get a copy of this or like can we get 10 copies of Frankenstein and like we usually like we elevated to like an email thread but then we call that like a special request and then whichever kind of coordinator wants to take it upon themselves to like order that we just kind of like build that into the budget to do some requests like that. Sometimes we also get like requests for very specific skills and we don't have those readily available I know back in the day we used to have like a lot less selection of languages but then if someone was like. I'm trying to learn like to go like or Arabic or something we like would make an effort to go like and get a book that would serve them if we didn't have it. Let's see. Can people in isolation be allowed books are the guidelines the same as for people who aren't isolated. Like with all guidelines that present it depends on some facilities allow people in isolation to receive books some facilities have different restrictions for people isolation some facilities do not. So it is really facility specific. I think somebody asked about donating used books which I'm happy to talk about because I spent a fair bit of my time on on our used books. The short answer is probably the longer answer is prisons as we've been talking about are really restrictive. And that means that we have to be really picky about what we take not because we don't like your books but because we want them to get to people. So sometimes we take use book donations and there's you can send us an email. That's one way to do it. Send us some photos of the spines of the book so that we know what the titles are. I don't know if Jamie Alley if you think I should go into the like minutiae of like what makes a good used book donation like condition like condition. Yeah, I think yeah some examples would be great. So something that we things that we have seen get rejected our books that have water damage for example, books that have writing inside. So a lot of us like over the years, maybe have at times written in our books underline things you written it's in the margins whatever. Put a book plate in the front, but also maybe has your, your own info on it book plates are really tricky. Sorry. Writing in books though is also really tough and if there's a lot of highlighting or underlining in a book we can't send it. We've had books rejected and sent back, because it's unauthorized communication. So when we when we say like yesterday used books they have to be in like really good condition and we have a lot of flexibility in terms of the genres that we accept but there are some things that we just don't send out like we don't send out Bibles for example, there are a lot of groups that do that. So we don't. And there are just other types of books that, for whatever reason we don't, we don't have it again I don't know how much we want to get into that but anyway, the shorter answer is probably send us an email. And someone you know sometimes will, if it's like a huge thing we can come and pick them up or whatever you know not always but I certainly done that we're all go, like, you know, pick up 300 books and put them in my car and work it out. I'll also say that with donated books sometimes we get really nice beautiful hardcover books that are perfect for scheme condition. Those aren't generally books we can send into facilities, because they're hard covers and they can be weaponized. So what we do is we sell books, we sell them on Amazon sometimes we go to book festivals like the area book festival, or the anarchist book there, and we set up tables and we sell really cheap paper or hardcover books or paperback books that are in areas that we might have way too much of. I'm so sorry to Jane Austin but we're not getting a lot of requests for those so we get a bunch of college kids dumping off their pride and prejudice copies will sell them at the book fairs. Because again our postage bill get pretty high throughout the years and it's a really great way to make sure those donations don't go to waste. So just be aware sometimes your books might not be available to send out but they can still benefit. This also reminds me of one auxiliary point to that which is you can also donate anything that they will accept at Community Thrift in San Francisco and if you pick prisoners literature project as your designated charity. We get a portion of the proceeds and we do I don't know if anybody knows this but it works and it means a lot and it is a great little side donation stream for us every year so yeah, you can do that too. If you have a bunch of hardcover and you don't want to bring them to us, take them there. Andrea asked what is the most often requested title and what are you reading at the moment. I'm going to say what I think it is and then Jamie and Brenda can correct me if they have another one. Dictionaries. A lot of people want dictionaries a lot of people want to like better their reading coverage skills dictionaries and the sore eye the sources. Just to kind of like I guess like as an educational kind of measure for a lot of people are just like to have so they can understand other things I also imagine like a lot of people don't say why they need the dictionary it's usually very brief note that's like please send me a dictionary. But I imagine for some people it's also understanding their own court case we also get asked for a lot of like legal primers and like can you send me a law dictionary which we don't get very many of and they're like expensive and hard to come by and paperback usually. That's big deal. People also ask for Alman X sometimes is another one of my favorite kind of types of requests. And what are you reading at the moment alley. Ah, I just finished kitchen by banana Yoshimoto, which was delightful. Very like happy hopeful, even though it talks about sad things and right now I'm reading. I just started the mysteries of Pittsburgh by Michael shape on who is a Berkeley local. I think you're either definitely number one request and other popular books that we get business type books how to not necessarily how to get a job but how to you know run a business investments real estate those sorts of things. And because folks who come out of prison generally have a harder time getting a job so they're, we see a lot of interest in how to be your own boss how to get your own income stream without having to pass background check necessarily. And as tech, Native American indigenous histories those can be really popular choices and hard to find sometimes. Graphic novels are another one really popular really high demand and hard to hard to stuff through donations but we have a really great partnership with a comic shop in Oakland called keep and cowl they've been helping us really fill up our graphic novel section. I'm currently in the middle of an audio book of Sarah McLean's romance novel called bombshell and it is great for all those readers interested. What's on your nightstand right now. Oh wow. It's, it gets really intense and I also compartmentalize really hard so I forget once it's gone. I just finished a really beautiful novel by Andrew Holler and the older one but it's just a beautiful classic. Lovely, lovely, sad, gorgeous tail. Why did I wonder, I wonder if there's. I'm just looking through the questions and I want to make sure someone asked if, if folks, the wardens and prison administrators. Support what we do. All right. Ali you might want to say more about that not to put you on the spot but I know that you mentioned it earlier a little bit like sometimes you'll, you know, you've spent more time on the phone than like. Yeah, full disclosure I've done absolutely like zero of those phone calls I think it's mainly the people who are getting returns the only returns I get are the letter returns, which make me feel really sad because usually. So if we can't send to someone like we are not allowed into their institution, we will send a note saying sorry we can't send to you like if you think this is an error like send us some paper like send us proof that we can send to you and we'll like if it's a, you know, a prior approval form or something like an approval form that they need to get from a correctional officer or whoever's in charge to let us send them books like send that back. Sometimes those notes come back like we can't even get the note saying sorry we can't send to you in. I think some yes, like, some are like oh this is this is a service and it makes me wonder like what they think they're doing. It makes me wonder like what they, I guess like feel their purpose is and like being complicit in incarcerating someone I don't know. I think others are like, you know might have kind of a more punitive viewpoint, I would imagine. And think that we should not be sending books in or that it should be a privilege and not a right, which I think all of us as kind of as permission statement we fundamentally disagree with everyone should have access to information or reading and would lawmakers be able to do anything to help I think in terms of prison censorship I think in various states that has been challenged kind of on the local or state level at various points. And one of our, so the thing about us is because we're kind of a grassroots organization we are not like as good as we could be about like keeping our own history where we've kind of taken on like a mass effort in the last year or so to like, best practices and build out like just build out a lot of like our processes because they've been really refined over the years but a lot of it is word of mouth. But in one of our older notebooks there's like this really cryptic note for Pennsylvania that says like, here's the jailhouse lawyer if anything happens in Pennsylvania again contact him and I'm like I don't know what this means. I think yes, we currently are not like working with any lawmakers to try to do any big moves I think sometimes on the list serve other groups, like, start talking about doing something and you'll see groups kind of be like yeah we'll help elevate like we'll help like if there's a media campaign or something count us in. And we've shared similar stuff on like our social media pages as well. I think sometimes we interestingly find allies and chaplains and prison librarians, which has been kind of a hard thing for us because we aren't taking the place of the government by filling libraries and prison that's not our work. We send directly to prisoners so it's their books. But we feel for them because they are defunded they don't have books and that's that's the work that they want to be doing as well. And I guess maybe one thing I don't know that we've mentioned is that a lot of and some folks who are listening probably know this but since the beginning of the coven 19 pandemic. A lot of libraries that do exist in prisons have been closed and some have still not reopened and so that's also sort of been part of. It's just been different in the past few years. I guess is one thing to say about that maybe alley has more to say again not to put you on the spot but anything about this. Yeah, no I think especially even now we'll get letters that's like someone tested positive for coven we're on lockdown I haven't seen another part like I have at 20 minutes out of my cell this week to shower like. So it's it's devastating imagining people living in those conditions regardless of whatever brought them there right it's inhumane. And so, like, yeah us being able to send books directly to people that feels incredibly powerful. And yeah there there are many libraries that just haven't reopened and the proof of that is kind of in the letters we're getting better like, we have not a library since 2019. We haven't had a library since since XYZ. Sometimes, especially with all the like snowstorms and things and hurricanes and past few years, our library flooded it has not been reopened we're all now on the second and third floor of our institution like things like like just the weirdest and most terrible things is what I would add on to that. Oh Jean, excellent question have you heard anything about prisoners sharing your books with each other. Yeah anyone want to touch on that. I think we do hear that. And a lot of times when folks are writing their initial letter even they'll say you know when I'm done with this I'll share it with my cellmate or I'll share it on my block. And that's really, really, really great to hear. And for other, their books are their treasures so they keep them to and both are great. As long as they're sharing our information we're happy. Not very often but over the, over the over time I've seen a few specific requests from folks whose book who's lost their books somehow or they've been taken from them. And they're, they were in the middle of something right like, again this sort of goes back to what I said earlier it's like I can just read the book I want when I want right. And so, you know, somebody's cell got flipped or the stuff got corned they got moved this stuff got taken you know what the stuff happens, and it's really out of their control and they just wanted to finish the book. So sometimes we get very specific requests, we ask folks to write in and tell us sort of like genres and topics and things, because you know, our books are donated mostly. And we certainly can guarantee any titles but you know sometimes we'll get one where it's just like this was my book, and I need to finish it or I need to be able to refer to it again and again it's like, that's your stuff. One of the most satisfying feelings when you get a letter that has specific titles, and you find it in the library. It's amazing. Yes. Well the other things I like is like we've had kind of just some anecdotal, like fun stories about people who share information like I know. I forget where it was someone emailed about this but apparently one person wrote back and was like, I found your address for books etched into the wall of myself lock. Yeah, I'm writing you. And then someone else one time I was sorting letters and there was like a fat stack of letters from Neal Creek State Prison in Ioni, California. And one of those letters someone was like I put up your information on the bulletin board I hope you don't mind. So many requests for them. I was like cool everyone in your creek is getting books for us incredible. Best of luck in the mail room I suppose. Other publications or magazines besides the sun that offer free subscriptions to incarcerated individuals. I personally do not do either of you. So the jailhouse like lawyers handbook. I'm butchering the title. They, if you can request a copy if you're incarcerated and they'll send you one free park will prisoners advocacy resource, something with a C connection community park. They'll send you a resource guide for free and they've got tons of resources for other prisoners literature groups or legal help or letter writing, and those sorts of things. Prison Activist Resource Center I'm sorry I'll send I'll put it in the chat. Good to be go ahead if you want to read it. Yeah, the next question is what about that's on health and health conditions. We get those two specific health conditions I think less commonly but often focus on exercise or, you know, be overall wellness and sometimes diet or nutrition. Sometimes we get really specific ones of like I want to know about arthritis and occasionally we'll have books in there to fill. Yeah we everyone's only get requests from someone who's like they told me I have this medical condition or like I'm going through this and I might be having surgery for this do you have any reading on it. And sometimes we do have like medical dictionaries or things and I know other other folks have used like our resources to like advocate for their own health care from within. So it feels nice to be able to provide support in the in the most basic of ways I guess for that. You mentioned kind of the stack of mule creek letters remind me that people sending us letters is actually a really big investment on their on their end of their resources it can be really expensive for folks to send us a letter get the paper, get a stamp. And so sometimes we'll get one envelope where they pulled their letters and they've shoved them all in there and we'll get 10 requests in an envelope. That's why we really take it seriously when we hunt down packages and we try and rewrap them and all of that. And because we know how much of their resources it's actually taking to get a letter up to us. Yeah, some people share envelopes to where you're going to say that. Well, I was going to use a specific example of one that I was thinking of that I got it I got a thank you letter one time and someone. You know, we talk about it in the request to right where it's like, this is what I had to do to write to you, like, like folks will tell us and I think that's, it's really important that, like, you know, not because not ever we don't all see all the same stuff all the time right like some of us are not even in the library all that often it just totally depends on schedules and what we do and. But I had a, I had a, it came back because I had sent the book package out so it came to me but it came to everybody right. Probably the letter that I think about the most from a guy who explained like what he had to do because he didn't have anybody on the outside and he doesn't have any money and so he sells his food trays to other people so that he can earn enough money to like pay for a stamp and then that's, that's a risk right because like, if we don't write back, he's done a lot to just even it with us in the first place if we don't send him back books like that's. It's not just that we didn't react and we weren't able to provide for that request like it's also like a loss on his end. So I think about that it's just like one example a lot you know and that there's a lot more of that going on than anybody shares with us. But it's, it's real and a lot of us know about that so. Yeah, sometimes people gift us stamps to like incarcerated people will send us stamps as a thank you or as like a here like which is really powerful, especially knowing how much kind of money or work goes into acquiring stamps or having stamps on your commentary book, where you're going to say the same thing Jamie. I was absolutely going to say that we've all said folks who once they get out they come along here with us. And that's really incredible. We're definitely looking to keep those voices in the room and make sure that folks who have those experiences are are in there with us and not just people were doing a service for. That was amazing. Thank you so much for sharing all of that information and your resources and why you do this that was very thorough. And not only that but the audience was really thorough as well. I think you have some friends out there. Now I'm trying to read the comments as we're doing this but don't forget this one document has everything you need we you know I tried to catch everything. So there's that rose brought up, who's in the audience brought up. Dr genie Austin who is our own SFPL jail and reentry services librarian who has a new book out about serving incarcerated folks in a library setting. And they will be doing our last one city one book event about knowledge and curiosity while being incarcerated, and I put the link to that in the in the doc but it's happening Tuesday the 13th. Same place, same time. Thank you all so much and library community. Thank you for turning up plp. Thank you so much for your amazing work. Amazing and dedicated and keep doing it. Friends will see you again soon. Thank you everyone. Thanks. Thanks a lot. We got away more than 50%. Bye everybody.