Welcome to Tuesday morning. It's not Monday, it feels like Monday, but it's Tuesday after Labor Day. I'm Jay Fidel, this is Sync Tech, this is Community Matters, and today we're talking to Megan Cowher. She is a candidate having succeeded past the first round of voting on primary day. She's one of two candidates for prosecuting attorney to be voted on an election day. Welcome to the show, Megan Cowher. Thank you very much, Jay, for having me. So now you're in a race with Steve Arm. What's the difference between you and Steve for prosecuting attorney? Well, the clearest biggest difference is my youth and my energy. I've got a lot of energy. I wake up at five o'clock every morning and I can work all day, all night to about 11 o'clock at night. Okay, and you've been a deputy prosecuting attorney before. Can you talk about how long and under what prosecuting attorney what your experience was like? Yeah, I was under Peter Carlisle. He hired me right on the spot. I moved up very quickly through to the career criminal division and I was there for, I was at the prosecutor's office in total for about five years. I've done about 45 jury trials. I've got, now I've got experience as a deputy prosecuting attorney, a defense attorney and a civil litigator. Oh, you're in private practice now. So are you doing criminal stuff or civil stuff right now? I'm a civil litigator. 80% of my practice is civil litigation. I do take some criminal defense cases, but I only take very, very big cases.  Ah, white collar. So you have a degree in accounting from UH and I guess that was before you went to law school. And the question I have for you is does that especially qualify you for white collar crime? Yes, you know, lawyers are afraid of numbers, not me. I'm not really afraid of much, Jay. But numbers are very easy for me. I can go through spreadsheets and documents like no other and I can comb through millions of documents and it doesn't pose a problem for me at all. Yeah, let's drill down a little on that. You know, we have really, maybe I'm being binary about this but we have two kinds of crime. One is the physical, classical, call it common law crimes, although they're all statutory. And the other is white collar crime, which is actually, it's punished less severely, at least it is in the federal system. And it's harder to prosecute because you have to have those special skills, special training to deal with the numbers, as you said. And my question to you Megan is what's more important than not only in general, but specifically in Hawaii, I've always had the impression that we didn't do very well at white collar crime. And a lot of people got away with a lot of things because there was nobody around to investigate and prosecute them. How do you feel about that? Well, I think that's changing. The Honolulu Police Department does have a very good team of white collar detectives and they're very good at what they do. I mean, they can access bank accounts, they know who to call, when to call. They've gotten a lot of experience in it in the past 10 years. So I think it's out of sight, out of mind for most people because we don't see the results of it, but I'll tell you, when you're hit with a white collar crime as a victim, it's devastating. Trying to clean up your record and getting on the phone call with banks and credit unions and credit agencies is a huge headache. And so while people might think that, oh, it doesn't really happen or it doesn't happen that often, it does happen and it's extremely devastating for victims. You know, one of the things that's happening in COVID and I want to ask you more about COVID in a little while, but is that there's more scammers out there on the internet? And we know that nationally, internationally, of course, and we know it locally too. And I guess I would wrap that in white collar crime, but if you put me on a jury, I'll tell you now, on the record, if you put me on a jury with a scammer, beware, I don't like that much. And so the question is, can we, are we prosecuting internet scammers? And what would your platform include about prosecuting internet scammers? I will say at the state level, it's very difficult. I'm not sure if HPD has the resources at this point to get the evidence that we need to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that this quote internet scammer has violated the law. However, I do practice in the federal court and we see it in federal court, not all the time, but we see it pretty frequently. The federal government really is in a better position because they're across state lines. A lot of these things that happen, happen across state lines, not just within Hawaii. And because the federal government span reaches across state lines, they are in a better position to investigate these types of crimes. And the federal government has much more resources than the state. Yeah, you're talking about the state, but the prosecuting attorney is the city county job, it's the city county office. And so what's the intersection there between prosecutions by the prosecuting attorney in the city county and prosecuting attorney, or rather a state deputy attorney general, who might be called a prosecutor. I know for example, there's a unit in the state attorney general's office that's dedicated to internet scams. So I wonder what the crisscross is on the two jurisdictions. The division that you're referring to in the attorney general's office, I think you're referring to the internet enticement of a minor. That's the division that they have at the attorney general's office. So basically, if you get on the internet and you attempt to hook up with a minor, that's the attorney general's division that's going to charge you with that type of case. Otherwise, 90% of the crimes on Oahu are prosecuted by the Honolulu prosecutor's office. We're talking about assault, fraud, theft, homicide, sex assault, kidnapping, robbery, burglary, all the driving offenses. The attorney general's office only handles the state cases for example, welfare fraud, Medicaid fraud, electronic enticement of a minor. And any cases that the prosecutor's office has to recuse its office from. I see. So it's just kind of sharing and sometimes one, sometimes the other depending on the circumstances. You know, one thing about the prosecutor's office is that it took a bad blow with the KLOHA business. I say business I think that's the only work that really a thought. It was a real enterprise. And you know, that's credibility issue. It has to be restored. How do you propose to do that? Cause people walk around still today, still today shaking their heads about KLOHA and the kind of corruption that flowed out of his management of the police department and his wife's involvement in the prosecutor's office. I'll tell you Jay, I am the only candidate that has actively in has actively assisted the United States Attorney's office in investigating both Catherine KLOHA and Keith Connoisseur. I have sat down with the assistant United States Attorney the FBI, the agents. I've given them information. I've given them facts. I've given them witnesses. I've given them evidence. And I know exactly who was involved in that scandal with Catherine KLOHA. There's a handful of people that are still in that office that have access to files. They have access to witnesses. They have access to information, confidential information that they shouldn't have access to. And they need to leave that office. And I have made a promise to our community that I will terminate all of them if they won't leave on their own. Suppose they fight with you. I mean, they can try to bring a wrongful termination lawsuit, but they'll lose. Okay, you were there, you know. I do know. Yeah, well, it pays to have that kind of experience because the public reading the newspaper and watching the ad hoc information that comes out on the six o'clock news, they don't necessarily know what happens. And that's the way Hawaii is, isn't it? There's two levels of things. But one of the things I mentioned before the show is that Peter Karlau took positions on public policy issues. And he would lobby actually for bills that straighten things out as far as he was concerned about the way the criminal law worked, the way the prosecutor's office worked and so forth. I remember going to a downtown business community, luncheon one time, and he was there as a guest speaker. And at the end of his remarks, he got down on one knee on the floor and in front of a couple of hundred people. And he begged them to support one bill he was working on. So, I mean, I don't think, in my view, or rather, he didn't think that being prosecutor was just about managing the prosecutor's office. It was about managing the criminal law so that the prosecutor and the police could do the jobs they were supposed to do. What's your thought about that? I agree, Jay. We are the expert in our field. The legislature has no idea how the criminal justice system works. They have no idea how to treat a mentally ill person. They have no idea how to treat a drug addict. And I'll tell you, I do know. I have the personal experience in having interventions with family members. I have treated many, many people that suffer from mental health disorders, including schizoaffective disorder, schizophrenia and bipolar. I am very familiar with it. And I want to educate the legislature specifically on mental health and drug addiction. That raises the question of this whole tension between doing punishment and deterrence on the one hand and caring about humanity on the other hand. And I think a prosecutor is charged with making those decisions at least some of the time. You have to represent the public need for justice, but at the same time, you have to be human. And so I wonder what your philosophy is about that. Which side do you tilt on and how do you blend the two? People get the misconception because I do want to enforce the law on all levels. I want to charge all crimes. However, treatment is always the better answer. I am a huge advocate of the Habilitat treatment facility. I do believe in all the other treatment facilities as well, but I'm closest to Habilitat because as a career criminal deputy, I dealt with the worst of the worst. And so they were looking at Habilitat or nothing at all. And so I am very familiar with that program. I'm a huge advocate of that program and I'm a huge advocate of treatment. And mental health treatment is very key because I see a lot of people self-medicating and I see a lot of people not understanding the mental health disorders that our community is suffering from. And I want to be able to help these people. And so I'm very familiar with that program. I'm a huge advocate of that program and I'm a huge advocate of treatment. And so I think that's a pretty big challenge and the goal of Habilitat is to help people or some other communities to be quickly free from the control of the law. Yeah. We have to make the best community we can have. We have to recapture the old Oel Comet every level. And so that brings me to the question of racism. We've seen all this Black Lives Matter protests against racism, systemic racism, in mainland. contrast with the kind of racism that people talk about on the mainland. And what can we do about it? At least what can the prosecutor do about it? I do not believe that there is systemic racism in the justice system. I believe that people suffer from their own internal bias and internal prejudice, but I do not believe that as a justice system, we focus and we are against a certain race. I do not believe that at all. You know, I see it in the mainland. I see it every single day. I can't even keep track with what white officers shot, what black suspects. I can't keep up with it anymore. And it's devastating to watch that happen, but we don't have the same type of racism in Honolulu. I will say that there is an ACLU study, which shows that there is an over-representation of native Hawaiians in our justice system versus in our community. But I strongly believe that that is a socioeconomic issue. And as a prosecutor, I would like to go out there and be a community leader, show these underprivileged communities, Hawaiians or Pacific Islanders, that they can educate themselves and learn, you know, crystal methamphetamine is probably the most aggressive factor in our criminal justice system. And I want to educate our community about that. But police officers do not say, well, that person is native Hawaiian and that person is not native Hawaiian. I'm going to arrest the native Hawaiian and let's go after him. We are not doing that here in Honolulu. It is not the same as in the mainland. Well, suppose, just suppose hypothetically there was a bad apple police officer. And I say that maybe that's too conclusory. There was a police officer that mistreated somebody. Whether it's on racism or just being mistreated somebody.  Absolutely not. I've taken the position that the prosecutor's duty is to protect our community by objectively applying the law against anyone that violates the law, whether the person is a police officer or non-police officer, rich or poor, homeless or not homeless, local or not local. We cannot choose who we prosecute by race. And I will tell you, there were other candidates pushing that agenda. And I kept saying that, that is exactly what leads to corruption. Because if I get to choose what race of people I'm now prosecuting, the next prosecutor is going to say, well, she chose to prosecute that race so I'm going to prosecute another race. That's, it's a slippery slope and we cannot go down that slope. Good. Okay, so now I want to know about COVID, you know? COVID has changed our lives. I know it's changed my life and if it's changed my life, then it must have changed a lot of lives, okay? I'm sure it's changed your life. Even though you're still running in the middle of COVID, I commend you on that, you know, that's admirable. But the question is, how has COVID changed the justice system? How has it changed the job of prosecuting attorney? How has it changed the criminal justice system? And how is it going to change it further as time goes by? Well, what we see right now is, you know, there was a two large releases of inmates from old triple C just because of COVID. And I will tell you, I objected to those releases because these people have already been found by an objective neutral judge to be a threat to our society. And now the Hawaii Supreme Court says, well, because we're suffering from COVID, just release them. And I'm talking about Rashad Battle. Rashad Battle assaulted somebody. He was released from old triple C because of COVID initially. Two days later, he harassed somebody by threatening them. He was arrested. He was released three days later. He assaulted and stole from somebody else and was re-arrested. And then he was released and one day later assaulted somebody. And he was released just because of COVID. And we can't keep doing this. We cannot keep releasing these inmates just because we're in the midst of COVID. And that's what we're looking at. And if I was the prosecutor, I would object. And I would say listen, Supreme Court. Rashad Battle did this. And I have a list of other people. And, you know, unfortunately, I don't think the prosecutor's office made that much of an objection to releasing the COVID inmates. You know, in Europe, we've seen and we get to know in Europe, they're very, what do I call it? They avoid recidivism by allowing the individual inmates to come out into the community, work in the community. Of course, they select them. It's not just a blanket release. It's a selection process.  And it works. They don't have a lot of recidivism and they don't have a lot of mean people coming out of prison. So do you think that the prison system, the justice system, if you will, is working well in terms of returning individual convicted criminals to society as better people? I think that treatment has changed over the past five years and probably more like 10 to 15 years. And I believe the Department of Public Safety needs to revamp its programs because I represent a lot of people in saguaro right now. And the programs that they have are very archaic. I believe that the Department of Public Safety needs to get in touch with people like Jeff Nash, the executive director of Habilitat to find out what type of treatment is being provided nowadays. This new treatment for new criminals and we need to start teaching our inmates to learn a trade. We need to start teaching them when to relax and how to relax without using drugs, when to work hard, when to sleep. I know it sounds crazy, but they need to be taught these things because they don't have these life skills. They don't know how to relax when it's time to relax, how to work when it's time to work, how to make food for yourself and clean up after yourself. After you've made that food, how to make your bed. And I know that these things sound very simplistic to you, Jay, but these guys, they don't know these skills. And I know this because I represent them. Yeah, very important. So, oh, some questions have come in. Let me, what are your shortcomings? Okay, this is the rec question. What are your shortcomings in the race for prosecute? You wanna talk about it? Sure, I'm the underdog. That was made very clear to me when I decided to run.  And I said, have you met me? And here I am. What was the answer to that? Okay. Yeah. Exactly. Next question is, do you support the drug court, Megan? Yes, I do support drug court. I will say hope probation more needs to be refined and retuned, it's not working. Steve Wom did great things for our community. He did help start hope probation, but that was 15 years ago and it is not working the way he envisioned it. And now what my clients and a lot of other clients are doing are gaming the system. And they're really realizing that all they have to do is admit to smoking drugs. They'll sit in the cell block for three hours and then they'll be released. They'll sit in the cell block for five hours and then they'll be released. Then three days, then five days, then seven days, then 10 days, then 12 days. And it's a revolving door because all they're doing is, yes, I admit, I smoked crystal methamphetamine and they know they just have to sit at OCCC for a couple of days and then they're released. And so it's not working. What would you do to make it work? Well, they've got to have less chances. If they mess up, they can't have 15, 20, 30 times to come back into the jail cell three times and they've got to go to Halawa. I mean, they've got to shape up or ship out. I mean, they've got to do the program, do the treatment or go to prison. You know, we have a sort of degrading social environment because of COVID. There's a lot of domestic violence and that is a crime. There's a lot of street violence resulting from people who have been cooped up too long and really can't stand it anymore. And it's not just demonstrations, it's out there with weapons and dastardly felonies. And my guess, let's assume for this discussion, that will increase as COVID increases. If COVID reduces, we're all better off. But if COVID increases, then it makes people feel cooped up. We're gonna have more of that. How can the prosecutor's office deal with an increase in physical crimes? Well, my theory has been that we have to charge all crimes across the board. Nonviolent crimes, mid-level crimes and high-level crimes, murders, assaults, everything. Right now it's hard because people are committing crimes, HPD is coming to arrest them. They're being put at OCCC, but they're being released pending their trial because of COVID. And I'll tell you that needs to stop because these guys that are committing crimes, they know that they're just gonna be released.  They tell me last week there were five shootings that people didn't hear about because it wasn't on the news, but that's what's happening. They need to be put at OCCC and they need to stay there pending their trial. And I will tell you, the problem with that is we're not having any jury trials right now because the judiciary can't legitimately bring in 80 people from the community and say, here, sit in this small room and decide guilt or innocence. Or even 12 people and have them sit in a little small box. So I told you before the show that I wanted to offer you an opportunity to express anything you wanted to talk about, how your campaign has been, how you're dealing with it, how you're dealing with the opposition, so to speak, how well it's going, whatever, whatever policy point you wanna make, take a couple of minutes and tell us. Okay, well, this is what I'll tell you. The reason why we have seen this increase in crime in Honolulu is because the current administration's failed policies. They were not charging low level crimes. And this is what I mean, Jay, by low level.  And we can prove that it's that person. The prosecutor's office has put that to the back burner and they tell HPT, we're not gonna charge that crime. Someone steals your car and is driving and has the key but has no authority to drive your car. Prosecutor's office is not gonna charge that crime. And the problem with this is when this person gets away with it, and I'm not just talking one, two or three times, I'm talking about 10, 15, 20 times, you know what happens when someone tries to stop them on the 21st try, they become violent.  And this is why we're seeing an increase in crime because the prosecutor's office failed to charge those low level crimes over the past 10 years. And the criminals have gotten empowered, emboldened. They've become brave, brazen and aggressive. And that's why we're seeing this increase in violent crime. We have to stop this. I'm going to charge all levels of crime, low level, mid level and high level because crystal methamphetamine has taken over these criminals. These guys, the child protection services has yanked these children from these homes, yet these people still smoke crystal methamphetamine. These guys have chosen to sleep on the hard concrete with no home, yet these guys still smoke crystal methamphetamine.   They need to be faced with the opportunity, either prison or treatment. And I'll tell you, prison saves lives, Jay. I know people don't like to hear that, but prison saves lives. I grew up on the street. I was homeless at 15 years old. I have lived on the street. My friends are former drug addicts who have made great things in their lives and have gotten treatment and own businesses now. And they tell me, we talk about it all the time, prison saves lives. And so people need to be charged so that they can be faced with the option, treatment or prison. And I intend to enforce the law on all levels for all of those reasons. And we need to clean up our community. And I intend to do that.  And I don't think I have to ask you that because this whole discussion has been an answer to that question. You are a litigator for sure. But I will ask you this question, Megan. As prosecutor, you're gonna try cases? Because not all prosecutors do that. I'm going to try cases, Jay, because part of the reason why I ran is because the office is lacking direction. It's got great deputies in there. They're great trial attorneys, but they need to see it. This is how we do trials, deputies. I want you to see it, right? I'm gonna take the hard cases, like unauthorized control of a propelled vehicle where a defendant has the key. And everyone thinks, oh, he's just gonna get up there and say he has a key, no way. I'm from the streets. I've lived on the streets. I'm gonna get under the skin of that defendant and I'm gonna show the jury that he's lying. And when he's convicted, he's gonna get the treatment that he needs. Thank you, Megan. Megan Cow, candidate for prosecuting attorney of the city and county of Honolulu. It's been great having you on the show. Thanks for coming around. Mahalo. Mahalo, Allah.


Okay guys, raise your hands if you were shocked to see the latest pick Adele posted. Honestly, she looks almost unrecognizable. At the start of the new year, she'd already dropped a crazy amount of weight and now she's even slimmer. Fans are both proud of the singers while it's concerns since she lost 100 pounds or more, but sharing her birthday post last week, I can tell that Adele is happy to show off her new look. While most of us are probably stuffing our faces at home during this global pandemic, then there's Adele who's working on herself and going down a handful of dress sizes. I know a lot of people are making a huge stink over the big change and I'm sure many are criticizing her, but it sounds like she's been working on her weight loss for a while and it's likely been more gradual than we think. Adele's a British singer and songwriter who just celebrated her 32nd birthday which we know from that Instagram post she shared. She's been widely praised for her voice and talent and became an icon to many. Her list of awards and nominations is too extensive to name them all, but to get an idea she's won 15 Grammy Awards alone and she's even won an Academy Award for Best Original Song in a Movie. I think one of the reasons Adele is getting a lot of pushback for her transformation is because previously she was a hero for others who felt that they fell into the plus size category.  In 2015 Adele told Rolling Stone, What I love to show my body off if I was thinner, probably not because my body is mine, but sometimes I'm curious to know if I would have been as successful if I wasn't plus size. I think I remind every one of themselves, not saying everyone is my size but it's relatable because I'm not perfect and I think a lot of people are portrayed as perfect, unreachable, and untouchable. If you think about it it doesn't matter anyways because Adele isn't even that relatable. I mean which of us are Grammy Award winning artists with a voice like that? Likely not many. What's going on guys and girls my name is Cara and this series we've titled Before and After. We did it before and after on Adele at the beginning of the year but after her new photo went viral it seemed like it was time for an update. We're gonna do a little refresh on how she's changed her look over the years from her style in general to any plastic surgery she's had and of course her weight loss. I'll tell you all of Adele's secrets on how she shed over 100 pounds or what we know anyways. I've also done other celebrity transformation videos in the likes of Jessica, Simpson, and J.Lo and I'll link to some at the end. If you like this channel make sure you're subscribed and ring that bell to be notified when we post so you never miss out. As always if there's anyone else you want me to document let me know in the comments down below. And be sure to follow me on Instagram because I love connecting with you guys. Now let's get into this video. Adele burst out onto the scene around 2008 which feels like ages ago because it was. I was like 16, I was in London and I wrote some songs and I put them on my space. You were in space? I wasn't in space. What's wrong? I'm not tight. Come on. You're not in space. It's space, you're in space. I'm in the computer though. Not in space. Like, um, like in space. No, no, in the computer. If you remember that far back Adele did not look the way she does now. At the 2008 Brit Awards Adele actually wore a recycled dress that she used at another event a few weeks before and her 19 or 20 year old self was still adjusting to the spotlight. Adele also had darker hair then and didn't give off the same confident vibe she does now. She often rocked bangs and dark eyeliner. For one appearance that year the star didn't even really dress up and instead chose an oversized gray sweater on the red carpet. Slowly Adele's look became more polished and elegant and for her first Grammy appearance she chose a much fancier outfit. Around 2011 Adele started introducing her big hair styles and updues that could be considered somewhat of a signature look. She also lightened her hair and was going blonde or gradually which I definitely like better on her. In 2012 she had the perfect blonde and rocked the classic look with bold red lips. By this time Adele had mastered Hollywood glamour and in the coming years would keep the blonde hair and stick to a similar style. We can tell that Adele loves big hair, big false eyelashes and dark liner. Around 2015 and 2016 she toned down the amount of makeup she wore and let her hair down more. But the biggest change to Adele's look definitely started at the end of 2019 and is clearly continuing now which she's been giving us gradual peeks at over the months. So let's address the elephant in the room. Adele's crazy shocking body transformation. I guess this was bad news for anyone who feels comfort seeing a celeb larger than size 8 because now the woman certainly falls into the skinny category. After months of staying out of the public eye for the most part and not releasing any new music, Adele posted that 32nd birthday photo on Instagram in the midst of this global quarantine and it shows off her noticeably thinner bod. Adele started looking slimmer last October in a photo from Drake's birthday party she posted with the caption reading. I used to cry but now I sweat.  Reportedly she also told the fan way back in January she already had lost 100 pounds after pics surfaced while she was on vacation with Harry Styles and James Corden looking happy and healthier. Now with even more changes to her look it's estimated Adele's dropped a whopping 150 pounds at least. Now the singer hasn't really said a public word about her massive weight loss so the praise and attention she's getting is already a little controversial only because she's done way more successful and jaw dropping things in her career over the past decade than something to do with her appearance. On the other hand the crowd who's mourning the plus size of Adele isn't right either. She doesn't owe anyone anything and all that matters is that she's happy. Nobody said that since she was a little bigger in the past that she has to stay that way but it gets tricky in Hollywood because everyone always has something to say. With that out of the way I'll tell you what we know about how Adele manages major transformation and what her secrets are. First of all the singer started her weight loss journey years ago and has definitely been putting in gradual steps. She also went through a divorce last year and if she's anything like me sometimes breakups motivate you to get in the best shape ever so you feel good or just happens but who knows. Adele's personal trainer Pete Gerasimo also spoke about the internet's awestruck reaction to her weight loss. He said, When Adele and I started our journey together it was never about getting super skinny it was about getting her healthy especially post pregnancy and post surgery. When 25 dropped and the tour announced we had to get ready for a 13 month grueling schedule and that time she warmed to training and made better food choices. As a result she lost considerable weight and people took notice. Peter also added that Adele wasn't doing this for publicity or anything like that it was completely for herself and her son Angelo and just how she wanted to live her life. Adele has said she adopted a brand new eating routine to boost her health and keep her voice in optimum condition but to the diet plan could be rather boring at times. In terms of eating the star credits the cert food diet. One important thing about her plan is that she cut out toxic and processed foods and drinks which helped her really see results. Adele ditched her 10 daily cups of tea which she put two spoons of sugar in. As well as cut out caffeine, alcohol, cigarettes and spicy citrusy and tangy foods for a while and that gave her a huge kick start. Now hearing all of that you already know she was committed. Back in 2016 Adele spoke to Vogue and said, I was trying to get some stamina for my tour so I lost a bit of weight. Now I fit into normal off the shelf clothes which is a really big problem for me. This cert food diet plan which is apparently still using focuses on foods that are high in serduent activators. A quality set to suppress appetite and help regulate the way our bodies process fat and sugar. Her trainer Pete recommended this plan and it seemed to stick. Adele would incorporate things like kale, buckwheat, cocoa powder, blueberries, apples and turmeric into her diet and drink lots of tea but this time green tea instead of the usual kind she cut out. This diet also includes plenty of green juice especially at the beginning. It also only allows for a strict 1000 calories a day. It might sound super lame but at least the cert food diet lets you enjoy cheese and red wine. Adele's previous trainer said, I don't believe she liked exercise much but she has changed her lifestyle and I believe that 90% was dieting. But nevertheless Adele still has to work out. It's rumored her usual exercise is 60 minute cardio session and or circuit training. She's also a big fan of reformer Pilates. According to The Sun the singer has taken up this type of Pilates to strengthen her body which has resulted in her most recent weight loss. Reformer involves doing Pilates moves on special machines and is said to improve posture, flexibility and balance as well as being great for weight loss. So experts do say that Adele likely lost about 150 pounds in total which is no light task. I think that whatever dress size a singer is her talent should still be the focus and the bottom line is that she's happy. Finally it's no doubt that with weight loss Adele's face changed a bit too. An aesthetic expert revealed that her drastic change has made her face features more prominent than before. Dr.  He also said that loose skin and aging can come about with losing a lot of weight since you're losing roundness in the cheeks and jawline. Apparently Adele's major weight change is obvious because some wrinkles now are more pronounced. It's often a complaint of individuals that lose a lot of weight that they're worried they look more tired or ill because of these face changes. And the same doctor says he recommends focusing on nutrition, skincare and even facials as her diet stabilizes. He also says she can get dermal fillers too to increase volume but as far as I'm concerned Adele isn't known for that. In fact it's rarely been speculated she's ever gotten any type of work done over the years which isn't usually the case for celebs. The only cosmetic work the star may have gotten is a nose job but it's not likely. Adele does look significantly different from the early days. If you look at her nose it's super sleek and perfect but it's hard to pinpoint when exactly she would have made that change. It could just be really good contour and makeup but there's also the possibility that around 2015 Adele got a rhinoplasty. But that's just what some tabloids speculate online. What do you guys think? All right guys and girls that wraps up this video here on Before and After. Clearly Adele is thriving and happy with her new look and health. Instead of focusing on whether or not she should be a certain size I think we should focus on how she's the same talented artist everyone has loved for over a decade. Positively on her Instagram pics coming from other celebs and fans is all well deserved and I think we should just let her have her moment. But of course the 150 pound weight loss can't be ignored and let's be real she looks like a different person but Adele doesn't owe anyone anything and can be whatever size she wants to be. But I wanna hear from you guys. What did you guys think about Adele's transformation? Was there anything I missed? You let me know you know where as well as who else I should do a before and after on. If you wanna talk more you can hit me up on Instagram. Be sure to hit subscribe and I'll see you guys in the next video. Bye.


Hey there lads and ladies, it is Petrifying Pumpkins here back with the Firewall Zero Hour video. This one is all about the new updates aka Operation Nightfall and the issues that this update has brought to the game, the backlash from the community and some other stuff too so let's just jump right in. So the Operation Nightfall update launched on Tuesday the 21st as was promised but for many people including myself it was completely unplayable. A few seconds after booting the game and you go to the main menu the game would then just immediately blue screen crash back to the PlayStation menu and this was very common it wasn't just me, many of you were all experiencing this. Now a workaround for this was to use an alternate account because for some reason that would work for people. It was speculated that the reason for this had something to do with how many PSN friends you had. If you had over a certain amount the game would crash and if you have an alternate account you're less likely to have lots of friends on that account hence why that seemed to be working for people that's a theory anyway but even if you could get past the blue screen there was still a myriad of connection issues that was preventing people from enjoying the new updates. So within 24 hours first contact entertainment released update 1.19 which did eliminate the blue screen crashing that many were experiencing but it didn't seem to address any of the other issues which are still here right now two days later. So let's talk a little bit about these issues the main issue right now is that it's very difficult to get into a match as part of the squad with teammates frequently losing connection and squad leaders often getting stuck in an infinite black screen requiring a reboot of the game in many instances so that's the biggest problem we're facing right now but players are also noticing other strange changes or maybe bugs player health seems to have been increased significantly which seems to be a bug I don't think it's intentional and this has had people wondering if guns have been nerfed and all this kind of stuff we have been told since that there's been no nerves to guns also there's anti-aliasing which no longer seems to function for those of us on ps4 pros at least I can't notice a difference anymore and the next up we have the intentional design decisions that are rubbing some players the wrong way but these are more subjective so first up is the removal of the ability to join on a friend while they are in the matchmaking screen now the reason for this I assume is to prevent boosting so for example you could join on a friend end up on his opposing team because his squad is already full and then you could either feed him or her intel or you could trophy boost and now of course with the introduction of missions you could pretty easily grind missions out by exploiting that method so now if you want to play with your friends you'll have to squad up in the main menu first which is what I was always doing anyway and is how it was originally intended to be so it doesn't affect me too much but some players are very much against this change so it'll be interesting to see your first contact entertainment stick to their guns on this one next up then is the new UI which appears to be divisive in terms of whether or not it's an improvement over the original I personally love it it's way sleeker looking but I do recognize it's not perfect it does seem to take some time for it to load in preview icons in the customization menu which I don't like so hopefully that can be improved in the future and it takes an extra few clicks to view all the contractors which doesn't bother me too much but I can see why it would bother others but overall I still prefer the new menu I love that we can customize out our contractors in the lobby now and you know all that good stuff I also like the daily tasks and weekly missions because it's just nice to have goals of course I also hope the first contact entertainment will extend the time limit that we have to achieve these goals because right now it's almost impossible to complete them with all the disconnects going on so another design change made by first contact entertainment was the new way in which the contractors are displayed in the lobby so they no longer mimic your gun movement one-to-one instead they play out these canned animations so like one teammate will sit spread-legged on a chair the one stands up the one squats down I find this one of the stranger decisions made by the team and I'd love to hear if there was a particular reason for that change like was it because it looks less janky this way or is it less demanding on the hardware to do it this way either way interesting change so with all these issues many people in the firewall community are understandably disappointed and even critical of some of the changes that they don't like but then there's some people in the community who are taking things a bit too fair acting like their lives are over or that first contact entertainment employees should be fired over this or even making allegations that first contact entertainment only care about the paid dlc and don't care about making the game any good which when you think about us is actually some really stupid logic not only because they have a reputation as a company to maintain but because they'll actually sell less dlc if the game isn't functioning so this is not what they want at all and you can bet your ass that they're working theirs off right now to get it fixed they've already got one fixed house I'm sure the next patch will be ours as soon as possible on their end so that's it for this video lads and ladies I'm going to make another video when nightfall is working correctly where I'll go over the other changes and additions but right now I can barely get a game in so I can't really talk about it much there's also a developer diary the first contact entertainment released on Monday where they teased future maps and some other stuff and I will go over that too in more detail when I get a chance for now though let me thank my patreon supporters for their continued support and if you want to help me out and stay up to date with all things firewall then consider doing all that usual shite I'll see you in the next one bye for now so this is just a quick little bonus kind of updates that has happened since I started recording this so I'm just having that at the end of this video so there has been an update posted over on discord by first contact entertainment trevor and he says at the moment we are focusing on getting fixes out we have a patch in the works that needs to go through the ringer there will be at least one patch before the weekend and we'll be working continuously to get more fixes out as quickly as we can all I can ask is that people are patient so that's the update we got from first contact entertainment's end hopefully this patch that's coming before the weekend will be one that allows get games a bit easier fingers crossed and okay now I will end the video


This is a question I received from a subscriber about dating and it can help a lot of you, so make sure that you stay tuned What is up everybody, this is Chris from the rewired soul where we talk about the problem But focus on the solution and if you're new here, I love getting questions I love when all of you out there ask me questions because it means that your wheels are turned It means that you want to get some suggestions some advice maybe some knowledge maybe some wisdom So this is a question from a subscriber and if you would like to ask me a question for me to answer in one of my videos Make sure you email me or DM me on Instagram or leave a comment down below Do whatever you got to do get a hold of me. Alright, so this is a question about dating a sober guy Now listen very carefully Don't turn this video off because I'm gonna cover some things that all of y'all need to hear whether or not It has to do with somebody at sobriety or not. Alright, so let's get to the question Alright everybody, I may look a little different. Some of you saw the original video and you're like Chris Why'd you take down the original video? Well, I took it down out of respect for the viewer who sent me the email There was a lot of details in that email that she asked me to remove So I took it down and I am just Re-recording this to give you all some context for anybody who didn't see the original video. So anyways a young woman emailed me and Basically her situation was she was seeing a guy who had been sober from alcohol for about a year and He had been clean from substances for about four months. He went on a trip. He had a relapse He experienced some withdrawal and he started working with a sponsor who suggested that he focused 100% on his recovery No relationships know nothing like that But you know because he has feelings for this young woman he said, you know what like, you know, we can still be friends and He was also saying that you know, don't wait around for me for this whole first year No dating thing because I don't know who I'm gonna be in a year. Alright, and she was asking me my opinion Should they stay friends? What do I think is going on in his head and some things like that? Alright, so that's kind of the context of the email So the rest of this video will make a lot more sense But anyways something I forgot to plug in the last one is like share this video share this video because if you're Not somebody I know you know somebody who is debating on staying friends with somebody that they were seeing and now they're not saying All right, share this please get the word out there because I'm gonna cover a lot of different topics in this video. All right Now here we go. All right Great question. There is so much going on in this question. Okay, so first thing first thing. Let's talk. All right, um, I Don't think this guy has been as sober as he told you Withdrawal does not just happen withdrawal only happens if you have been Binge drinking for a while. All right, like after a vacation unless this was like a month-long vacation Which I don't know like unless this was a very long vacation His body would not become dependent to alcohol that quickly Substances like heroin. Yeah, you can do it once and then get withdrawal But alcohol like he didn't go like party for a week or a weekend and then have symptoms of withdrawal That's not how it works a hangover. Yes withdrawal. No. All right So I would be kind of curious about how honest he was from the start. Okay now In regards to him getting sober and working with a sponsor and talking about not dating in his first year Cool good on him. Um, I do want to I want to preface the rest of this video the rest of this video with saying These are strictly opinions based on my experience based on my experience With guys in particular having a lot of friends who are females and things like that Strictly opinion, but the first thing I will say is I don't know. I don't know what's going on in his head I hope you've watched my video about expectations But yeah, he might be legit. He might be honest He might really want to take his somebody seriously and do what his sponsor says and all that jazz Like his motive for staying friends. I don't know I try to give all of you tough love very honest, but much needed truth so I don't like to sugarcoat stuff and have you hang on to hope but Hope it's necessary, but not in instances like this in my in my opinion He might be somebody because this is usually what happens He might be somebody who was trying to spare feelings and saying let's just be friends In order to just not saying, okay, I'm done with you. Let's never talk again But this is something that I want all of you to hear. It's very hard to do this It is very very very hard. It is very rare that people stay friends After they dated it happens. It does happen Okay, my my son's mom and I are like best friends, but she's like remarried and has like a son and Everything like that and like we're friends and obviously we have a son between us now as far as staying friends after like a Relationship no matter how serious it was this, you know, three or four months Somewhat serious maybe but there's usually just from my experience a few reasons why they do this One is to leave the door open for hookups, which this guy shouldn't be doing anyways or two To string you along for a while until he is ready for you, which is unfair That's why I'm a little confused because it's kind of contradictory for him to say let's stay friends But you know also just go and live your life. He sounds like he's confused But this is very normal of somebody in early sobriety. They have no idea what they want. Okay, and like I Think probably the best part of what he said was he doesn't want you waiting around Hanging on to this hope that you guys are gonna date after a year like the amount that I changed over my first year Was insane and the amount I changed over my My after my first year to my second year was even more You know, and I continue to grow I continue to change the type of woman that I was dating when I first got clean Or even in my active addiction completely different later on so he he's correct He might be a completely different person now Here's here's the part that all of you need to hear to like it's I think You know way too many of us get far too attached in a short period of time Way too attached way way way way way to attach So this is time to start reflecting in words and saying like why why do I get so attached? Why because I Used to be the same way that like all of my relationship advice it comes from so much experience is disgusting Okay, but I would get so attached and something I realized was I have this Insane irrational fear of being alone. Okay insane irrational fear So as soon as I click with somebody I'm like, oh my god, which I start projecting into the future How long are we gonna be together with this is my soulmate? Da da da da da and we get this issue with thinking that we're never gonna meet somebody as good as that again and Girl, let me tell you right now first off. You will second off I'm sure he's a great guy, but he is not in his optimal state. Okay, so what that means is is that? He is doing you a favor. Okay? I'm I'm 1000% sure if me and you talked a little bit more and you told me all of his qualities I guarantee you can find those qualities and somebody else something that I always try to tell my friends who are either Going through a breakup The fear of being alone or I have friends who have been single for a very long time and have this fear of being lonely And then they try to cling to like the first person who gives them some attention again is remember this Remember this everybody. There are over 7.6 Billion people on this planet 7.6 billion people. Okay, the chances are that that person was the one is Pretty improbable. Okay. Now. Here's the other thing too, and this is a whole nother video a whole nother rant The idea of the one needs to get out your head. It needs to just leave your brain Okay, this is something that has been sold to us by romance movies and novels and all stuff like that This is not the way love works. Okay. This is not the way these These things work. Okay. Yes, I know I know what you're thinking right now But my mom and dad they met in middle school and they've been together ever since cool. They worked well together Okay, that is amazing Congrats to them, but Your fixation on finding that one person set yourself up to get attached to people who are Not the best fit the best match for you. Okay When we are constantly looking for the one we are lowering our bar We are accepting way too many flaws like in our honesty in your specific situation This guy has a lot of work to do. Okay, a lot of work to do you deserve better Okay, and hopefully he knows that you deserve better. All right There is no reason why you should go into a relationship thinking that you have to fix anybody or wait around for them Especially with recovery. One of the reasons why it's so Such a bad idea to date somebody in the early recovery is a lot of times We're just waiting for the other shoe to drop a lot of times It sucks to admit this but a lot of people relapse, you know what I mean and getting emotionally invested in something like that You just shouldn't do it. All right, like I said 7.6 billion people on this planet less than 10% of them are addicts and alcoholics Find one that already has their act together. All right Again look within yourself because like you said anxiety and OCD You might have an issue that you need to look within yourself on and see if you have an issue trying to find people who are broken You know like these these are things and sometimes they're manageable Sometimes they're not but a lot of times early on in relationships People think that they can deal with it and it doesn't take very long for them to realize that they can't right and Sometimes it sucks because the time by the time you realize that you've already moved in together Things like that and that's a bad time to figure it out So my suggestion is like cut the ties if you want to stay friendly cool But have your expectations out of bare bare bare minimum. Do not wait around for this guy Go out. I do think that you need to do some some soul searching. Okay, find out what you're looking for Look within yourself. Are you fine trying to find people with flaws in them? you know what qualities does this person have and Be very realistic with yourself on is it possible that somebody else has these qualities because it definitely Definitely is like I can't think of anybody on earth where they're the only one with these certain qualities All right, so go out there find somebody new or stay single for a while It all really depends on you All right, but a lot of this stuff that I've talked about in this video You can all find it in the broken picker playlist. I will link it at the end of this video All right, but anyways, thank you so much for emailing me this question I hope I hope you guys got something out of it and please share it if you got something out of it Or you think you know somebody who needs to see this video Please please please share it and if any of you have any questions that you would like me to answer Feel free to leave them in the comments below or head to my about page It has my email and all my other social media so you can get a hold of me All right, but thank you so much for watching if you like this video Please give it a thumbs up and if you're new here make sure you click that little round subscribe button I'm always making videos to help you out with your mental and emotional well-being and like I said boom Watch that playlist called the broken picker a ton of relationship advice. All right, but anyways, thanks again for watching Ask me some questions and I'll see you later


Everybody forced here ripping everything just refreshed 2021 Chronicles football hobby six box half case number 14 Random team style so guys on my back end of the website page just refreshed logged me out That's awesome Good luck. Thanks for joining literally like The past two nights if something can happen, it's gonna happen. I need like a three month vacation from the past 48 hours See a virtual give me a few more a few more days than the what week and a half I have left Devontae Smith score silver Eagles Fields got Devontae Smith purple Dynagon to 199 Carter and ETN Manson Victor, maybe it's not your product man Brown's Jersey Nick Chubb to 199 Jamar Chase Lawrence Davis Mills score to a chase. We've got Jets that is a Zach Wilson Momentum auto non numbered Great hit Jets Got me Kafer to 399 Panthers Trey Lance Flux Silver Dynagon Devontae Smith Eagles That is Carr out of 99 Raiders Dean well Jay on Brown Titans signatures not numbered back Wilson luminance Davis Mills present black Lance clear vision That's a big card you sell it I'm guessing Tray Lance Marchase Jones to 49 Packers Fields legacy rookie waddle magnitude Yeah, I was gonna say I Would have sold at that time that product was out to though to be fair I think most people would have terrorist Marshal jr. Silver for the Panthers Lance luminance chase to 199 clear vision for the Bengals Yeah, seriously Jess causing chaos over here. We don't have a Wi-Fi currently So 50 Brent Selick auto Eagles Power surge last night midstream to good stuff Texans Davis Mills Lawrence Tony I'm not sure fabs. I honestly have no idea wouldn't be surprised. He like I said, he joins a lot of breaks He spends a lot of money on breaks Got Kaderis Tony to 199 Giants. I'm sure he has some very nice cards Silver Flux rookie Jets Zach Wilson got Trey Lance Bears Justin Fields purple Flux to 199 Trask Russ Ravens Rashad Vaidman rookie Jersey to 399 Thomas Treasures Wilson the legacy for the Jets turn of the century Jaguars auto Trevor Lawrence 19 of 25 Big hits in the first couple of boxes congrats Jags Andrew T We will mag that of course God teal out of 49 there for the Jags Ian book Yeah, I was always checking the radar as we were kind of getting hit And yeah, I was telling them I was like it's bad here, but apparently it's terrible when you're here I think we got some of that though because we had very strong winds We had lights flickering tonight and stuff, too I thought for sure the power is gonna go out or surge again. It took out our internet That's cool or a Wi-Fi. I should say silver Cardinals Rondale more from Flux Javante Dynagon red for the Broncos to 99 Yeah, I did see a lane Darius Tony rookie Jersey Giants to 399 from plates and patches Redemption going to the Bears Justin Fields legacy updates rookie signatures blue Congrats Chicago man every box so far has had a big rookie QB auto You go Bears will mag that Lawrence Lance Ellinger to 199 Colts Najee prison black Michael Carter score silver Jets Lance to 49 for the Niners Trevor Lawrence prison black Kyle Pitts Oh, yeah, we've passed a few mons. They haven't missed with Marseille autos and wanglu autos Jesse Sapeleau auto to 50 for the vibe for the Niners. Yeah, you see more than most the sets actually Trey Lance score Fields clear vision. Yeah, I don't know what sets they have all the rookie autos and there's so many different sets Trey Lance to 399 Niners ETN and Lance Fields Got Kyler to 99 Cardinals Trask Flux Silver Dynagon Zach Wilson Jets Red Jamar Chase Dynagon to 99 Bengals Jaguars Jersey card Leviska Chanel to 199 St. Brown Steelers Pat Fryer move silhouettes rookie Jersey auto to 99 Lock it to 399 Seattle Lance clear vision silver Falcons rookie Kyle Pitts Luminance Pitts Atwell to 99 Rams from playoff Michael Parsons prison black Jalen waddle magnitude Vikings Kellan Mond rookie Jersey auto silhouettes there That's a Vikings rookie auto 75 nice hit Minnesota Fields Fields ETN Giants Daniel Jones on the auto 10 of 10 Nice hit Giants Lance Jacobs a 399 Raiders Najee Harris Flux Sam Ellinger silver legacy Colts Lawrence God St. Brown to 49 Lions Dynagon Lawrence Falcons Fleet Bay Franks crown Royale rookie auto to 99 Najee Luminance Mills grid Iron Kings Lance to 199 Jamar Chase Bengals Kyle Pitts prison black Falcons Zach Wilson silver prison black for the Jets congrats Jets Magforia red Dynagon Let's get the car there red Dynagon Falcons color match Kyle Pitts to 99 Sheeps rookie are not rookie, but Jersey card Tyree killed to 199 Jalen waddle Flux and Elijah Moore Giants turn of the century auto Kaderius Tony to 75 Michael Carter to 199 Jets Waddle Dynagon President black rookie silver Jets is Michael Carter ETN to 99 Jags waddle chrome Score update I should say Jets again here have a nice run Michael Carter rookie auto to 75 Tray Lance Justin Fields Shuba hover to 49 Carolina Davis Mills prison black Silver Davis Mills score update The Texans Jalen waddle blue Flux To 25 nice one dolphins That fields legacy Jersey card Colts Quentin Nelson to 199 Mac Jones base Waddle Luminance Michael Carter prison black Jets That will do it not doing a full recap just the mag cards as we are behind Silver Zach Wilson for prison black Bears redemption Justin Fields legacy update signatures blue Waddle Trevor Lawrence to 25 on turn of the century auto for the Jags And a Zach Wilson not numbered playoff momentum auto That's gonna do it. Thanks again everybody. We've got more chronicles coming up


و أقول في القرآن ما جاءت به آياته فهو الكاريم المنزال و أقول قال الله جل جلاله والمصطف الهدي و لا أتأواله الحمد لله الجليل وصفه الجميل لطفه الجزيل ثوابه الشديد عقابه الحي القيوم الذي أوجد الكون من عدم ودبره و خلق الإنسان من نطفة فقدره ثم السبيل يسره ثم أماته فأقبره ثم إذا شاء أنشره فسبحان من إله ما أعزه وأقدره و أشد أن لا إله إلا الله وحده لا شريك له شهادة معترف بوحدانيته مقر بأولوهيته و ربوبيته و أشد أن محمدا عبده و رسوله أفضل بريته اللهم صل وسلم على محمد و على آله وأصحابه صفوة الله من خلقه و خيرته ام ما بعده اخواني في الله إني أحبكم في الله الله تبارك وتعالى He has made in it calamities and hardship إن الدنيا جبلة على المصاعد الله has made this world full with calamities and trials and tribulations طوبعة على المتاعب hardship tiredness fatigue This is what the dunya is This dunya is balaa ونكد ابتيلة وكبد الله has said in the Qur'an لقد خلقنا الإنسان في كبد This world this is how it is الله تبارك وتعالى wants to make the dunya different to the Akhira for the believers They can't both be the same The dunya can't be Jannah And then Akhira also Jannah The dunya has to be something hard and tough It has to be a trial and tribulation In order for the believer When he comes the day of judgement And Allah places the believer in Jannah He sees the difference Where he once was And where he now is May Allah make us from the people of Jannah May Allah distance us from the Hellfire Everyday we live in this world It's a fear and it's a concern We're concerned for our Deen We're concerned for our worldly affairs And from the greatest calamities In which is sent down And from the greatest مدلهمت Is what? From the greatest Is فقد الأحبه It is to lose your loved ones من الأباء والأمهات To lose your father To lose your mother To lose your brothers and your sisters الإخوة والأخوات والأخوالي والخالات Losing your maternal aunties And your paternal aunties والأعمامي والعمات And losing your uncle And your paternal auntie والأحباب and your loved ones والأصحاب your friends and your companions الله تبارك وتعالى He told us in the Quran فأصابتكم مصيبة الموت الله تبارك وتعالى He referred to death as a مصيبة أكلامتي فيأ الله ما أصعبها من لحظات والأحوات والله He is from the greatest things It is from the greatest pain To lose a person you love And that moment you find out That that person is no longer Going to be with you in this world And that they are not going to Stay with you, it's hard It's painful وأعصرها من دقائق وساعات And it's very hard And it is very heavy That minutes and those seconds That you know that The day that you realize That this person is in another world And you're in another world The day when you realize The wrong things that you said to them And the hard statements That you used against them And they're not there anymore To say forgive me I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that And you start to feel فتتجرع مرارة الفراقي والوداع You feel bitterness Of that deep heart And that separation That goes between the both of you Allah says in the Quran منها خلقناكم From this earth we created you وفيها نعيدكم And this earth we will take you back ومنها نخرجكم تارة أخرى And from it will be taken out الله tells us in سبحانه وتعالى It was this earth we were created from originally It's this same earth brothers and sisters That when the dust goes on your clothes You try to clean it off It is this dunya Or it's this earth That you walk on today When your face goes down on the earth You don't like it You wouldn't lie down on the streets And you would not lie down on the ground منها خلقناكم It is from this earth that you were created from وفيها نعيدكم And this earth you're going to return back to It's what's going to swallow you It's what's going to eat you This body that you're taking care of And you're creaming This body that you're feeding And you're giving it food This body that you place Over a nice comfortable bed It's going to be eaten by the earth ومنها نخرجكم تارة أخرى And from this earth You will once again come out from So how is a person going to be able How can someone And how can a person find strength يدفين أمه That he buries his mother ويضعها في قبرها And he places her in her grave And he walks away from her How can a person do that How is a person able to باري his father The father that strived And exerted all of his efforts وتعيب في الحياة الدنيا And he strived in his dunya To make sure that he gives you فو to eat A roof over your head And he tried his best To save you And protect you from any harm He gave you food He gave you a roof over your head And he gave you security and safety With the permission of Allah How is a person able to باري their own child When they see their child They find warmth And happiness in their hearts How can a person bury their loved one A man buries his wife The person who he spent his life with The person who he cares about He now has to place her in her grave And now raise the children by himself How can a woman Known that her husband is buried in the earth He's no longer going to be around To help her at the time when she feels low And she's unable to do it And she can't make it happen The person who used to talk to her And help her and guide her through it The person who installed happiness in her heart Is no longer around How is she able to Let that happen All of these are مصائب My beloved brothers and sisters That the dunya was created for It all becomes A reality for us one day But what is it that Can make a person go through all of that الإيمان بالله If he believes in Allah سبحانه وتعالى و اليوم الآخر If he believes in the day of judgment قال تعالى الله سيزن القرآن و لنبلو أنكم بشيء من الخوف والجوع ونقص من الأموال والأنفوس والثمارات الله says we're going to test you و لنبلو أنكم بشيء الله says we're going to test you with what الخوف فيها و الجوع حنغا و نقص من الأموال والأنفوس والثمارات الله is going to reduce your wealth الله تبارك وتعالى is going to reduce The people who are around you Their lives they're going to die Your loved ones are going to go Allah is going to reduce from you سبحانه وتعالى يعني the wealth he's given You're going to lose all of that and the crops and the vegetations You're going to lose all of that Allah is going to take people's lives سبحانه وتعالى الله then says و بشير الصابيرين Give glad tidings to the people who are patient Who are the ones who are going to be patient يعني who can endure and make it through all of those calamities Who are the ones who are able to do that الله says الذين إذا أصابتم مصيبة The one that when the calamity befalls them and they go through it and they are afflicted with it قالوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ They say قالوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ from Allah we came وإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ and to Allah we're going to return الله says أولائك عليهم صلوات من ربهم ورحمة وأولائك ومُلمُه تَدُوُو الله سبحانه وتعالى He says أولائك those who are just mentioned Who? The ones who say إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ The ones who are patient الله says أولائك عليهم All those people is what صلوات من ربهم ورحمة صلوات ورحمة ورحمة from Allah will be upon them وَأُولَائكَهُ مُلمُه تَدُوُونَ And they're the guided ones They're the ones who are guided الله guided them سبحانه وتعالى at that moment of loss They lost their loved ones They lost their father their mother They lost their children They lost their wives They remember Allah straight away because he's deeply rooted in their hearts قالوا إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ They say from Allah we came and to him we're going to return أولائك those ones أولائك عليهم صلوات ومضربهم ورحمة Those are the ones who Allah will praise them amongst the angels Those are the ones who Allah is going to send on them peace, happiness and joy And those are the ones who Allah guided سبحانه وتعالى الإمام البخاري رحمه الله نريتر نصح الحن الإمام المسلم من حريث آنس بن ماليك آنس رضي الله عنه he mentioned مر النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم بمرأة تبكي عند قبر The messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم he came by a woman who was crying next to a grave فقال The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he said to the woman اتقلها be conscious of Allah فيها الله تبارك وتعالى وصبري and be patient be conscious of Allah in what you're doing be aware of what you're doing have Allah in your mind فيها الله تبارك وتعالى وصبري and be patient قال to the woman she didn't know it was the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم so she said إليك عني leave me alone go away leave me alone فإنك لم تصب بمصيبتي you are not going through the calamity I'm going through you are not being tested with that which I'm being tested with ولم تعرف who the narration says but she didn't know who he was she didn't know the person that she was saying this to is نبي الله محمد محمد بن عبد الله صلى الله عليه وسلم she didn't know فقيلة لها The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم she can see that she's mourning she's crying he can see her situation he then left her the narration mentioned that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he left he walked away then the people came to her they said to her do you know who you just spoke to فقيلة لها إنه النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم the person you spoke that to the person you said that to is محمد بن عبد الله صلى الله عليه وسلم the Prophet of Allah so the woman became shocked of what she just did so she ran she went to the Prophet's house فأتت باب النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم when she came to the Prophet's door فلم تجد عنده بوابين but she couldn't find a security guard and the Prophet asked him there was no security guard blocking his door and there was not صلى الله عليه وسلم a receptionist that she had to go to none of that عليه صلى الله عليه وسلم and the scholars they mentioned that this was after the آية came down يا أيها الرسول انزل إليك من ربك وإن لم تفعل فما بلغت رسالته والله يعصبوك من الناس الله is going to protect you from the people after that verse came down the Prophet no longer had security guard before that he did صحابه they used to take turns in looking after him عليه صلى الله عليه وسلم but after that آية came down the Prophet was informed والله يعصبوك من الناس so she came to his house فلم تجد عنده بوابين she couldn't find any security guard anyone there فقالت she said to the Prophet عليه صلى الله عليه وسلم لم أعرفك I didn't know it was you فقالت the Prophet said to her إنما الصبر عند الصدمة الأولى the Prophet he said to her that the patience is when the calamity first hits you إنما الصبر patience is when عند الصدمة الأولى وما عند صدمة الأولى فقالتها صلى الله عليه وسلم إنما الصبر patience عند الصدمة الأولى it's when the calamity first hits you that's when you need to be patient صلى الله عليه وسلم so my beloved brothers and sisters now that we are seeing in the world the way it is the calamities that are taking place the people that are dying COVID-19 the deaths that we're hearing of what is it upon us that we should say when we lose our loved one that which is necessary for us to say عند المصيبة when the calamity befalls us is ماثبت عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم the things that have been transmitted to us from the Prophet عليه صلى الله عليه وسلم they used to say and from the things was as our mother أمو سلمة رضي الله تعالى عنها زوج النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم she's the Prophet's wife ألمان مسلم لريته دي سنة صحيح she mentioned she said سمعت أيهاد رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم يقول أيهاد the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم ما من عبد تصيبه موصيبة there is not a person who is afflicted with a calamity فيقول he says when the calamity hits him and he goes through it he says إِنَّا لِلَّاهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيهِ رَجُعُونَ as we mentioned before in the ayah those who Allah said about them أولاقة عليهم صلوات من ربهم ورحمة أولاقة هم المحتدون they say what they say إِنَّا لِلَّاهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيهِ رَجِعُونَ so the Prophet said whenever a calamity will befall him whenever he will go through a hardship whatever affliction he would say إِنَّا لِلَّاهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيهِ رَجِعُونَ from Allah we came unto him we are going to return the Prophet says that اللهم and then after that the person says اللهم the word Allah means يا الله اللهم the word Allah and they say this meme in اللهم that meme in that it's حرفوني that it's basically it's taking the place of ya it's saying يا الله you're calling الله تبارك تعالى you say اللهم what do you say اللهم اللهم جرنين في مصيبتي or Allah reward me in my calamity that I'm going through give me good out of it reward me with good وخلوف لي خيرا منها and give me something better than it that's what the person says الله reward me in my calamity reward me with good and also this thing that's happened to me bring about for me that which is better don't make my situation worse the Prophet said anyone who says that because the hadith says ما من عبد تصيب مصيبة فيقول that there is not an individual who when the calamity be be fooled or he goes through this calamity and says this إلا أجاره الله في مصيبتي except that Allah will reward you in your calamity أجر and guess what واخلف له خيرا منها الله will give you better than it أومد أم السلام رضي الله تعالى عنها she lost her husband someone she truly loved someone she loved she lived her took her time with a righteous husband a righteous slave of Allah a noble companion so when she died the Prophet ﷺ had told her to say this so the Prophet ﷺ she took his advice she took the Prophet's advice but look what she said قالت she said فلم توفي أبو سلامة وان أبو سلامة died قلت I said to myself كيف she said كما she said sorry when her أبو سلامة died she said and he passed away she said what the Prophet told her to say كما أمرانية رسول الله سلامة the thing that the Prophet told me to say I said it فأخلف الله ولي خيرا منه الله gave her someone better than أبو سلامة and who was that brothers and sisters نبي الله محمد مارد نبي الله محمد مارد brothers and sisters if you've lost a loved one and you cry there's no problem as long as you're crying is بضوابط الشراء it's within the boundaries of the sharia أنا سبن مالك رضي الله و تعالى عنه he narrated and he mentioned the Hadith of Imam Al-Bukhari narrated in his Sahih and also an Imam Muslim رحمه الله he said دخلنا we entered upon رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم when we entered upon the Prophet فأخذ رسول الله the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he took إبراهيم فقبله he took his own son إبراهيم and the Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم he kissed him و شمه ثم دخلنا عليه بعد ذلك he smelt him he kissed his own son و إبراهيم يجود بنفسي إبراهيم is losing his his dying passing away فجعلت عيناه the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم his eyes started to تدري فاني they were just watering crying صلى الله عليه وسلم فقال له عبد الرحمان ابن عوفن عبد الرحمان ابن عوفن he came and he said و أنت يا رسول الله oh messenger of Allah even you are you really gonna cry يعني he thought it wasn't allowed for someone to cry he said يا رسول الله are you gonna cry even you فقال the Prophet he said يبن عوفن إنما he said عبد الرحمان يعني the Prophet توكنت عبد الرحمان ابن عوف he said يبن عوفن إنها رحمة what you're seeing right now me crying it is that I can't come in out of my eyes that's mercy ثم أتبعها بأخرى فقال then the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he followed it up by saying إن العينة تدمع the eyes they water والقلب يحزن and the heart feels sadness ولا نقول we don't say إلا ما يرضي ربنا we say that which is pleasing to our Lord وإنا بفراقك يا إبراهيم ولا ما حزونون إبراهيم we are sad for losing you ألمام بنو حجر رحمه الله when he commented this on his كتافة حلباري he said هذا الحديث this حديث يفسر البكاء المباح this حديث this حديث it explains to us the type of crying which is allowed and this حديث teaches us والحزنة الجائز it explains to us the permitted and allowed crying وهو and that is ما كان بدمع العين it is the crying where the eyes water ورقة القلب and the heart is soft من غير سخط لأمر الله without the person coming with that which is angering الله without going against الله commandment also when a person loses is a loved one they are allowed to complain to الله نبي الله he is a he is a good example in this when he lost his child he complained to who Allah complained to Allah he doesn't go against being patient الله says in the Quran قال إنما أشكوب في وحزن إلى الله وعلم من الله ما لا تعلمون he said إنما أشكو I complained to who my pain my suffering my hardship I complained to who الله وعلم I know من الله from Allah ما لا تعلمون I know of him سبحانه وتعالى that which you don't know ولي ذلك it was mentioned شكا إلى الله ولم يشك من الله he complained to Allah but he didn't complain about Allah ومن شكا إلى الله وصل anyone who complains to Allah will reach ومن شكا من الله فصل and anyone who complains about Allah he will be disconnected he will never reach ولما شكا إلى الله وجد الخلف من الله and when he complained to Allah الله gave him better الله تبارك بالتعالى he gave him what he wanted ومن القيم he mentions in this كتاب عدة الصابرين والدخيرة الشاكرين he said إذا شكى العبد ربه إلى مخلوق مثله فقد شكى من يرحمه فقد شكى من يرحمه إلى من لا يرحمه anyone who complains about Allah to a creation like him then he has complained about the most merciful to a person who is not going to show you mercy الله is the most merciful how can you complain about him to the creation who has no mercy for you and so many people when they lose their loved ones they disobey Allah تبارك بالتعالى by doing things that go against the religion my beloved brother and sisters let's not be those who go against Allah after we've lost a loved one a person we love rather as soon as we lose our loved one there are actions that we can come with that might benefit that person that could benefit this person let's focus on making sure that we make this happen there are few things إن شاء الله I'm going to mention أبو داود narrated in his Sunan رحمه الله authenticated in صحيح الجامعة on the authority of عثمان عفاني رضي الله تعالى عنه that the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم إذا كان كان النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم إذا فارغا من دفن الميتي the prophet was one that if he left the burial of a person وقف عليه فقال that the prophet will stand over the body and he will stand over the grave and he would say استغفروا لأخيكم وسلوا الله له التثبيت فإنه الآلة يسأل he will say to the people the prophet استغفروا لأخيكم ask forgiveness for your brother or ask forgiveness for your sister وسلوا الله له التثبيت and ask Allah to make this person firm on the ground فإنه الآلة يسأل for verily this person is being questioned and interrogated now so the first thing that you can do for the person is a dua والاستغفار asking Allah forgiveness for them making dua for them أبو غير رضي الله تعالى عنه he mentioned that the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said إنه الرجل أيمان or a woman لا ترفع ودرجةه في الجنة a person will be risen in jannah he will be given a high place in jannah فيقول the person will then say why am I risen why am I being given this position how did I earn this place for you قال to the person it will be said to them باستغفار والادي كلك the reason why you've attained this place and the reason why you've been given this position is because you're child who you left behind asks Allah forgiveness for you ابنما generated أن شغل البانية رحمة الله authenticating الكتاب صحيح الجامعة also a benefit to person is a Sadaqah giving Sadaqah عشر رضي الله تعالى عنها she mentioned أن رجل قال للنبي أمان said to the prophet إن أم إفتوليتت نفسها وأظنها لو تكلمت تصدقت انتصدقت انتصدقت عنها أمان came to the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he lost his mother so he said to the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he said my mother if she was alive right now and she could speak and she could say words she would want to give a Sadaqah I know my mother if she was alive right now she would want Sadaqah to give Sadaqah she can't speak right now she can't say what she wants but I know what my mother would want can I pay can I give Sadaqah on her behalf the prophet said yes you can أليمام البقاريون ريتي دسين الصحيح أنا أصول أليمام المسلم رحمه الله ولذلك صاحب عون المعبود he mentions he says ومن أفضل الصدقة سقي المائي one of the most beneficial things that a person can do is doing well لأنه لأنه why أعام نفع في الأمور الدينية والدنيوية خصوصا في تلك البلاد الحارة في الأمور where it's hot and people really need water okay when it comes to their worldly affairs and they're here after affairs water benefits in the religious affairs وصول and everything they need water and their الدنيا affairs water does a lot for people so make hope يعني doing a well it's عام نفع the benefit more people can share it ولذلك ساعد من عبادة رضي الله تعالى عنه he said قلت يا رسول الله he said oh messenger of Allah إن أمي ماتت أفأت صدقوا عنها my mother passed away كن I give صدقة نها بها قال نعم the prophet said yes فأي صدقة أفضل which صدقة is the best oh messenger of Allah the prophet said سقي الماء in his كتاب صحيح ترغيب والترغيب حسنون لغيره حسنون لغيره also from the things that you can do for your loved one is قضاء الدين if there was debt on them that they had to pay to someone to pay for them سلامة بن أكوع رضي الله تعالى عنه he mentioned أن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم قوتي بجنازة the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم جنازة was brought to him ليصلي عليه so he can pray فقال the prophet he said هل عليه من دين is there debt on this person قالوا نعم they said yes oh messenger of Allah the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he said if that's the case and that this person is debt on him لا أصلي عليه I'm not going to pray on him then one of the صحابes he came to the prophet أبو قتاد he said يا رسول الله I will pay his debt please pray on him pray please pray on him then the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he went and he prayed on him when أبو قتاد said عليه دين يا رسول الله and this debt is on me I'm the one who's going to pay the prophet then stood up and he prayed on him also what you can do brothers and sisters is الحج والعمرة يبلا عباسي رضي الله بتعالى عنه ما he mentioned أن امراءة من جهينة جاءة إلى النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم فقال a woman from the people of she said my mother made a nader that she's going to do Hajj فلم تحج حتى ماتت and there was Hajj on her and she died and she didn't do it أفا حج عنها can I do it for her قال نعم the prophet said yes حج عنها go and do Hajj on her behalf أرأيت لو كان على أم كدين أم دين would you have paid off your mother's debt if there was debt on her أكونتوا قاضية the answer of course is yes then the prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم he said أقضوا الله ففل الله his debt فالله أحق بالوفاء الله is deserving سبحانه وتعالى for a person to give my beloved brothers and sisters في الختامة I want to say إخواني في الله my beloved brothers and sisters know that every single person every individual is going to go into their graves and everybody's going to be placed in that place and when you go into that place you're going to regret the moments that went by in your life that you did not increase in righteous actions you're going to remember those moments where you sat somewhere and you never did the auto-speech you didn't say سبحان الله و الحمد لله و لا إله إلا الله و الله أكبر you're going to remember those days when you didn't pray a sunnah you're going to remember many things that you left out so now that you have this opportunity perfect your situation and come with righteous action و لذلك بعض السلف they used to say كل يوم يعيشوا فيه المؤمن every day that the believer is alive is a what غنيمة it's a day of benefit it's a day of يعني reaping good deeds و لذلك they also used to say من أصلح في مابقية غوفر له مامضة anyone who perfects that which is left from his life and he worships Allah for whatever is left of his life الله will forgive him for his past و من أساء في مابقية and anyone who corrupts that which is left of his life و خدا فيه مابقية و مامضة he will be punished for what he has done in the past and he will be also punished and he will be held account for what he does in the future my nasiha to you my brothers and sisters and myself is do not forget your parents who passed away do not forget your father and your mother who passed away do not forget your brothers and sisters who passed away by doing dua for them by giving sadqa on their behalf والله they are in great need of it جعلنا الله و إياكم may Allah make us from those people من من قال الله فيهم يوزو الله سلبعضم والذين صبروا بتغاء و اجهي ربهم و أقاموا الصلاة و أنفقوا من ما رزقناهم سرا و علانية و يدرأون بالحسنة السيئة أولئك لهم عقوب الدار جنات عدني يدخلونها و من صالح من آبائهم وأزواجهم و ذرياتهم والملائكة يدخلون عليهم من كل باب سلام عليكم بما صبرتم فنعم عقوب الدار سبحانك الله وبحمده أشهد أن لا إله إلا الله أستغفرك وأتوب إليه السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته كيف يمكنك أن تفعله اشهر الثلاثة الآن سوف نعطيكم اشهر الثلاث من كل ما نفعله على this YouTube Channel بسرعة مثل هذا الفيديو و اشتراك لماذا؟ سوف يجعل YouTube يجب أن تساعدون أشهرنا الفيديو إلى أخرين و اظنوا أشهر كبير كبير يمكنك أن تتوقف لكم على اليوم إذا فعلت ذلك مع سبعة تساعدة سوف تساعد من كل شخص who benefits from one of our videos as a result of your like or subscribe that's an easy two second action that you definitely 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