Thanks for having me. Yes, I am honored to be known as actually first ever chief data officer, which means I'm a scientist and a beer crepe. And it's a position that I started last year. It's new in government to adopt these kinds of structures. So it's a little bit different than maybe some of your other speakers. It's a little interest type stuff here. Again, a science background, use technology to accomplish the science. Gosh, I started using UNIX probably back in 1987, pre-Linux. I actually started using it. This will date myself right here. On a Vax VMS machine using a UNIX emulator called UNIS.  But it got me into the right groove. And I had a colleague back at the time who had told me, look, as an earth scientist, people are going to tell you to learn Fortran and learn VMS. And he said, no, no, learn UNIX and learn C. And those were, that was great advice. Yes. So how many of you have heard of NOAA before as a government agency? That is wonderful. OK. Our brand recognition isn't quite as good as NASA's. But, and we've done the studies just point that out. So that's OK. But we have an operational mission. It's science-based like NASA's. But NASA's mission is research. Our mission is operations to get the quality information to the American people that they need to run their businesses, to protect their lives and property, to manage their water resources, to manage their ocean resources. And we take this mission very, very seriously. We've got 12,000 people that are working this mission right now. About 7,000 of them are scientists, federal employees. And in our mission statement, I've circled it here, our mission is to share that information. Right? So that's very important. We don't hoard the information. We try to get it out to others. And we've been doing big data since before the term was coined. Right? So part and parcel to doing oceanography, as I am I'm an oceanographer. Our meteorology is you're dealing with large quantities of observations that you're trying to glean some kind of insight about how the environment works. Right? And it's inherently a difficult problem. We've got way too much data. We've got about 30 petabytes right now that's in our archives. We have another about 200 petabytes of data that's sort of in our working data store within our organization. It's an enormous amount of data. We have a hard time moving it around. We have a hard time managing it. Surprise. If you look to see how popular this data is, and this is a site you can go to. It's called analytics.usa.gov. And the NOAA websites and data sources are usually among the most popular. It's usually in the top three or top five. This is just from a snapshot from last week of the last 30 days. So we usually get beat out at this time of year by the IRS. Everyone wants to go. There's a site called where's my refund. That's usually number one. The post office is up there near the top two. But right up there, forecast at weather.gov and weather.gov is always near the top. People really need to consume this information. And if you look, there's another site called data.gov. And be careful if you go there because it's really hard to use admittedly. But it's the first step the government's taking to try to get our data stores out into the public consciousness.  Okay. And that's actually not all of them, but it's most of them. And those of you that can read this up close enough, you can see part of the problem that we have. If anybody can actually understand these descriptions of our data sets, if you're not actually an oceanographer or meteorologist, good luck to you. But so we have this problem with translating our data, making it actually useful to people who are smart, want to be able to use this stuff, but maybe aren't subject matter experts. But we've got all this data about weather, climate, ocean, coast, fisheries, ecosystems. They're almost all open. If you ask for them, you get them. Okay. And most of them are accessible on the internet today if you know where to look and if you know who to ask to translate it for you. So getting to the openness for open source and open data, no other big consumer of open source, of course, but talk mainly about open data today. So we have a, it's built into our organization to share, share, share. We share everything openly. I think a lot of this comes out, in fact, we're scientists. We come out of the academic science community where sharing has always been central to the success of the science, right? So we've brought that with us from the 80s and 90s into our organization. Our organization was created in the early 1970s. And so today, you still have a reflection of that culture, that open culture, into an operational government agency. And it's a very interesting culture that we have. So on the worldwide stage, NOAA has been a leader for the entire United States in trying to broker data sharing among countries. And one of the most successful ones has been through United Nations, an organization called World Meteorological Organization, WMO. And after several, about 10 years of arguing about this and negotiating this, there is an international treaty today that says environmental data for the protection of lives and property for the good of society will be shared by all countries as openly as possible. And this is one of our foundational concepts that's built into our organization. And we have been successful in getting other nations to follow suit. Within the weather industry and inside the United States, there's always been this tension between commercial interests that are exploiting this data for information products and creating jobs. We are part of the U.S. Department of Commerce, so we love it when companies come and take care of data and create jobs and resell the data or make new information products. That's what we want to see happen. But that fine line between what the government should do and what industry should do has always been a little contentious, a little bit of tension there. And that's good. Way back when, when I, my first job with NOAA was back in 1996 and I had created, I worked at the National Data Buoy Center which has buoy data, wave data. If you're a surfer, you're familiar with the website. I got there, there was an availability of the data. There's an old HP Unix machine sitting around. I said, well, I'll throw Apache on it, I'll throw all the data on there. Now I threw GNU plot on there, which is still working there today, which is, there's a backstory to that too probably. But the idea was, okay, now you can get all the data and you can see graphs of it. Well, true story, the next day a phone call came in from Washington and said, take the website down. Somebody had called their congressman and complained that this government website was, you know, overstepping its bounds and taking away a business opportunity for somebody else. Okay. So this kind of, it's just, you know, cooler heads prevailed after a couple of days. Site came back up, it's been up ever since. But this is, you know, just demonstrative of the kind of tension, healthy tension that exists between government and industry over who's providing the data to who. But NOAA has responded to recommendations from the National Academy of Sciences and others to really define what this partnership model really looks like. And built into this partnership policy is, okay, we're committed to the mission, we're committed to consulting with industry, if we're going to change our data systems or change our observations, we'll let everybody know ahead of time. We disseminate this information openly as much as we can. Equity, fair and equitable access, if you have access, you get the same kind of access. We don't play favorites. And we recognize that industry is an important partner in the delivery of information products to the American public. So one of the things that we do, I like to change coming up is that we've tended to default to making our products accessible in the public domain. We don't license our data, we don't license our software, but we'll give it out to anybody who wants it with no restrictions on use. And so interestingly, that actually restricts our ability to distribute some products that have shared IP. We have partners in academia and industry that have contributed to the development of these products. And sometimes if it's shared that we can't actually distribute in the public domain. So by actually adopting some modern licensing practices, I think we could actually share even more information with the public. And I know that the Linux Foundation has made progress on the Community Data License Agreement. This is one of the things I'd like to possibly consider adopting for our organization. What's the value of this data? So this is just from last year, 2017, how many billion-dollar weather events and climate events there were in the country familiar with a lot of these, including the Hurricanes season. One of the great success stories about getting data out to the public and adopting some of the new modern technologies was related to Hurricane Irma, as you remember, hit Florida. As you could imagine, there were a lot of American citizens that were hungry for information and were hitting the NOAA websites very hard and data sites very hard. Typically, we have a hard time keeping up with that kind of demand. In this case, the National Hurricane Center, which is part of our Weather Service part of NOAA, we took their website, we put it on different infrastructure, we put Amazon Cloudfront in front of it, and we were able to handle over a billion hits a day during this peak hurricane season. Service never went down. People got the information they needed and were able to get out of harm's way. So it's a great success story, but we are still, as our Home Depot colleagues were saying, you're just starting to get into how to adopt some of these more modern technologies to do our job better. The value of this data to the economy, the ocean economy, this usually comes as shocked to a lot of people who don't realize how many hundreds of billions of dollars are writing on the ocean economy. This includes fisheries, this includes ocean transportation, includes oil and gas. It is a very, very big industry and it's continuing to grow and it's projected to grow over the next 20 years. The weather enterprise, similarly, as we call it, is continuing to grow as well. It should be about $10 billion a year right now. This is the value of the products and services that the commercial industries are selling. And two years ago, for example, IBM bought the weather company. It was the parent company of the weather channel and stuff. They bought that company for $2 billion. That was a thing that really caused a lot of us and know how to sit up and say, wow, this is even more valuable than we thought because the weather company at the time was about 200 people and a little bit of infrastructure. It's a significant investment but IBM realized weather touches every part of their company, every part of their services. Industry knows the value. So what we're trying to do now, we're doing an experiment. We're trying to say, can we find a way to leverage that value that's inherent in our data products? Can we leverage that to make the data available to even a wider group of people and make it more easily understood? Because there are two big challenges. Technical is how do we get the data to you and then the second is, well, how do we get you to understand the data? Those are both big challenges. And so we're doing something that we call the big data project right now. I'll describe for you. So to sum up the problem, so this is, if I show you any of our graphs of our data volume, they all look like this. They're all exponentially growing. This happens to be the archive down in Asheville, North Carolina, where I live. And if you look at how much data is actually going out, so that was the storage, 30 petabytes right now. This is how much is going out. You'll see the same kind of exponential growth. More and more people are trying to pull more and more data. Our systems are all throttle because we have to protect them from overuse. So we're getting hammered every day by a lot of companies that want the data and we have to restrict it because we have to have that fair and equitable access and we can't let the resource be restricted to only to a few people. We have to make sure everybody's got an equal chance to gain the data. And as you see, it's becoming a harder and harder job to do it. So in general, our demand is growing exponentially. Our costs are going up because we need more servers. We need more network. So it's growing proportionally and continuously, which is a problem because our budgets look like this and that's kind of optimistic, right? So it's not a great budget environment right now. That's okay. So what we're trying to do is we're trying to say, let's take this foundation of the data and the expertise that NOAA has. Let's partner with industry and have them help facilitate the delivery of data to third parties, other companies, the public, and any of the information consumers that we have. And Jim showed some figures with gears yesterday and was like, oh great. This is fantastic. I've got gears in my thing too. But it really is true. It is a system, interlock system and NOAA's expertise there in the oil can. None of this works unless there's expertise there that's being supplied to actually help people understand what the data are. So what we did is we signed what we call Cooperative Research and Development Agreements or CRATOS with five companies with Amazon, Microsoft, IBM, Google, and a nonprofit out of the University of Chicago called the Open Commons Consortium. And the agreement is that the NOAA data are going to remain free and open. They can't be sold, but they will host the data at no cost to the taxpayer and they are allowed to monetize services around those data. So make the data more easily consumed or whatever. They can actually charge for that, but they can't actually sell the data. So you can go to these sites. I'll give you some URLs in a second. You can download the data for free if you want it to, but they would like you to use them in place and use their tools to analyze the data. Use build products on their system. So it's a three year actually. We're going into four year. We're doing an extension right now. So we're trying to see whether this business experiment can actually work. So what we're doing here, and this is schematic, is we're reaching into the NOAA government infrastructure. We're reaching and we're taking out one copy of the data. So typically we distribute thousands of copies of the same data to everybody that wants it from our federal systems right now. So instead, let's take one copy out. Let's move it out to... We're actually using a data broker right now an academic partner that's helping us split this data and figure out how to drop it into all of our collaborators' cloud platforms and they turn it around and serve many consumers from that. We went from a one to many to a one to a few to many model of distribution, if that makes sense. Here's the URLs right now that you can get to. As I was telling Mark, Azure still hasn't released any public-facing services to date, which is the right within the agreement. Don't mean to leave them out, but just nothing to offer right now. But I'll show you some examples of these other ones in a second too. Everybody's working hard on this too. So as an example, so weather radar data, a lot of you are familiar with seeing weather radar data on the evening news or on your app on your phone. This was the first data set to move within this project, went to multiple of our collaborators. What we've seen on AWS alone is that we've seen an improvement of over two times the amount of people who are actually using the data. We've seen a 50% reduction on the NOAA servers. Okay, that's a good sign too. And we've seen other uses of the data pop up that we didn't expect. So that's what we're hoping to see. But we can't predict these things.  But if you're actually a bird migration biologist, that's actually what you're looking to see, right? So some of the first folks to come in to compute heavily on the AWS actually were the bird migration scientists who were able to track birds from this 20-year time series across the United States. And now, people that have come looking for weather radar data, we call next-rad weather radar data, 80% of those users now are going to AWS to get the data because it's faster and easier for them to do so. Google has loaded a lot of our climate data into BigQuery. And we've seen petabytes of data that this data sets like terabyte size and they've been able to move petabytes of this data just in a few months just because the data now has been loaded into a tool people are already using and it reduces that obstacle of understanding. You don't have to understand a scientific data format. You can go right into BigQuery. You can join on the data. You can do analyses and people are very interesting group there. The OCC, the Open Commons Consortium is using Jupyter Notebooks and putting basically the recipe for how to use the data out next to the data. And I don't think this is not going to play. There's actually a video. So Tampa Bay Times after the Hurricane Irma event, a couple of these reporters actually wanted to tell a story about the evacuation of Florida and how close Florida came to really almost like a worst-case scenario of the storm coming up the east coast where the majority of the population is. And they were able to use the satellite imagery and the code provided on the OCC platform to create a video storyboard for their newspaper. And these are not scientists. These are people who just, hey, we have an interest. We need to put some context. They reached out. They got the real data and able to integrate it. It's a great example for how this kind of stuff can work. IBM's created a whole bunch of new APIs that can tie into and ties into their Bluemix platform. I'm running out of time. So I'm moving ahead a little quickly here. And one of the problems that we're encountering is, so people trust NOAA's data today because they get it from a NOAA data service. But now we're asking something else. We're asking them to trust the NOAA data that exists outside the federal system on a partner system, right? And I think we're still a little bit ahead of the problem. But going back to the Irma example again, this was a fake forecast that showed up on Facebook, okay? And now it's got the NOAA logo on there. It is somebody I guess meant it as a joke. The National Weather Service does not think this is very funny, right? They do not play around with lives and property. And they were very concerned about this because there's no way to validate the forecast against the actual NOAA data. We don't have a mechanism yet in place where it could easily be done. But very quickly this thing spread like wildfire and it was supposed to be a joke that Irma's going to hit Houston again or something like that. But this definitely caught NOAA leadership attention and in general with this big data project that I'm talking about where we are seeking ways of making sure that the NOAA brand, the trust that comes with the NOAA brand is conveyed with the data. And so people can understand when they're using the data it's the real thing that they can have trust in. So in summary, so we have a very proud history of this open data leadership continuing on that path and we're trying to see how we can amplify that. Can we even take that to greater levels of making this very valuable data more useful to any of you out there that has an idea of how you can use NOAA data if it's being made available through these modern cloud platforms? Does that make it easier for you to actually create information products of value to you or to your company and to your customers? And of course we're also looking for other ways of just doing our business better and we are seeking a way, like I said, right now by definition this is an experiment for a defined amount of time. We're looking to see if this makes sense with our partners like Azure and Google and Amazon. Hey, can we actually do this sustainably going forward and do this as a matter of part of our normal operations and we'll know that probably by early next year. All right, well thank you very much for your time.


Gracious God Almighty, power and grace, abundance, provision, and every way, Heavenly Father, in Jesus' name we approach you again this morning. We delight in coming and entering into your presence in the name of Jesus, the one who died for us, the one who rose again, the one who is interceding at your right hand even now in our behalf, and this dear brother's behalf, I pray, Heavenly Father, that you would just bless Brother Brent.  It is really a joy to be in front of each one of you today, and just to be honest with you, just within a couple hours of being here yesterday, I just felt the Holy Spirit coming down on my life and being released in my life in a new way. And it's a joy to walk with you so many times in life, and all of you know this, there's many times that we walk alone if we're truly walking on the path of Christ. And as I was here yesterday, and we've not even been together very many hours, I see many people that are walking on the same path as I am, and are walking toward the throne of God. Someday we will all stand together in heaven, but today we have an opportunity to be together with each other. So I'm humbled to just be here with you today. This message has been burning on my heart for months, and to be honest with you this past Wednesday, I was feeling so filled with this message, I was feeling like I almost could take a box and just go out into a local town and stand up and shout this out because it was feeling coming so strong in my life. And it was a speaking so much to me. I want to just read from the passage of Scripture that we've been pointed to in Acts to give us a little bit of a sense of where we're going in this weekend. Acts 2 verses 42 through 47, I'm just going to read them quickly. And they continued steadfastly in the Apostles doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking a bread and in prayers. And next we see in this passage is the result of what they did. There's four things that they did there. And fear came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were done by the Apostles. And all that believed were together and had all things common and sold the possessions and goods and parted them to all men as every man had need. And they continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart, praising God and having favor with all the people. And then it says here, and the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved. And the thought came to me in the last several weeks that if we would look at these four things that they did in this passage, and we ask ourselves that many times in our life, why don't we see the power of God and the strength of God coming down on our life. If we would look at these four things that they did, they continued in the Apostles doctrine which we know was Christ doctrine. And if we would continue in fellowship, and if we break to bread together and do the ordinary things of life together, and then binding that all together where it says here, and they continued in prayer. If we do those four things, I believe that the power of God will come in our life and we will see God poured out in our life in a greater measure. And it's not, I can easily point to the passage before this passage right here, just a little bit earlier in this passage, it was when they were together that the Holy Spirit was poured out on them.  And we now here today, that flame has touched our hearts and it's in our hearts and that flame has anointed and is in our time and we are the ones that are the ones that are carried to carry the flame into our generation of the Holy Spirit and of the fact that there's a God in heaven and He's a God that is worthy to be served. And now I know you know the title and message today but I will just repeat it again, it's Encountering Christ in Prayer. And there's really two parts to this message. It's a very simple message in reality. There's a number one, if you are to encounter God in prayer, there is a cry that must go up from your heart. And if you are to encounter God in prayer, there is a second thing, there must be a preparation of your heart and I'm going to be speaking on those two things. So what is that cry? What is that cry that must be in our hearts? And many, you may have guessed this already but it's a cry that we see several times in the New Testament and it's a cry that's very common if you start to think about it. It's a, it's found in Luke 11 verses 1 through 13 and I'm not going to turn to that but it's, it's a cry that you've heard before, the disciples, one of the disciples and I believe he was speaking for the others that were with him. He came to Christ and he said, Lord, teach us to pray. And I find it very significant as I look at that passage that he, that they did not ask, even though they had been with Christ, many, in many situations they had seen many things. They had walked with him daily. They asked Christ one question. They asked him, Lord, teach us to pray. They did not ask him, Lord, teach us to heal. They did not ask him, Lord, teach us to feed the 5,000. They did not ask him, teach us to do miracles, teach us to cast out demons. They asked him that one simple thing, Lord, teach us to pray. And as I think about that, I believe in my mind that suddenly as they were there with him one day, the words that Jesus so often said, we said that those that have ear to hear, let them hear. Suddenly their ears heard and suddenly their eyes saw. They saw in front of them, this is a man that is just like us. We are a man like him and this man that is on earth, even though he's God, he needs power with God. And that comes through prayer. And they saw his life over and over as he would spend all night many times. The Son of God spent nights together with God. He had to have that prayer. He had to have that power of God in his life.  And as I look at that, I remember struggling for years and asking God, okay, I want to learn to pray. Where is someone to teach me to pray? And I believe that the disciples ask it in the right way because one day as I was asking that to God years ago, crying out to him, show me how to pray. And I was looking at books and I was trying to grow in that area of my life. And I was discouraged. And I said, who will teach me to pray?  You do not need another man to teach you to pray. And I believe that the disciples, when they ask that question, they ask the right way. They came to Christ. And he is the only person in our life that can truly teach us to pray. You must go to Christ himself. You may read some things from books that will help. You may have people around you that will point you to principles and paths. But the ultimate thing comes down to this. You are going to be learning to pray from the school of Christ himself. And you will learn to pray sitting at his feet. That is where we learn to pray, brothers and sisters. And it starts every day by asking that one question that the disciples ask. And it starts by saying, Lord, teach me to pray. And if that is your true desire in your heart, then I want to point this out. How much passion is there going to be in your heart for doing that? It really depends on how strong your desire is that you want to meet God and to meet the real God. And there's a passage in Mark 10 that I want to just point to you. And I may not read this here, but I just want to describe to you what is taking place in this passage. It's a passage for where there was a man named Bartimaeus, and he did not have sight in his eyes. And we have no idea maybe how long that he had gone with this, but he did not have sight in his eyes. And he most likely had heard about Jesus of Nazareth, the healer, and had thought in himself, I can't see. I can't go to Jesus. I can't get healed. And one day as he was, but he had that faith in his heart that if he could, he could get his eyes healed. And one day, as he was standing, as he was sitting there beside the road, and he heard a commotion going on, he suddenly realized from those around him as he asked, and they said, Jesus of Nazareth is coming, and suddenly faith welled up in his heart. And I believe as he was there, suddenly all thoughts of anything else in his life left him. And as he was sitting there, suddenly we know from the passage of Scripture, if we read it, he began to say, Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me. Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me.  How much passion would you have to ask for Christ to come to you? He might have thought to himself, this is possibly the only opportunity that I'm going to have to see Jesus Christ. This is the only opportunity I'm going to have to have my eyes healed. And I've been walking in darkness for so long.  He was probably getting kind of obnoxious because he did not want to lose. Jesus Christ says he left, and he cried out louder and louder and louder. And suddenly when Jesus did turn and come his way, those around him said to him, hold your peace. You've gotten his attention. And then it says here that Jesus said to come to him, you indicated he should come to him. And it said, and he casting off his garment. And when I think about what he cast off, when he cast off his garment, he cast off everything in his life that would have restrained him. If he had a few coins or anything that it was just of temporal value, he couldn't care less about anything that he had had that day, any collines that he collected. His soul purposed that day, and his soul thought was that he wants to see Christ because he wants to receive healing for his eyes. And I'm just here today to tell you that if you will pursue Christ, and if you will go after Christ with all of your heart like blind Bartimaeus, then God will answer your request. Hebrews 11.6 says, But without faith it is impossible to please him, for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. And I was reading this passage in the last several weeks. I believe God poured out something in my heart that I am supposed to communicate to some of you in this audience.  And you do not feel like a mature Christian. This is what God is saying to you. You have a soul, and I have a soul. And in God's eyes, those souls are equal value. There is not one of us that has more power with God than anyone else. It comes down to how much you pursue Christ. And if you will pursue Christ with all of your heart, you will find him. Jeremiah 29 says, and this was in the Old Testament, to Old Testament, to the children of Israel. It says, I will be found by you, sayeth the Lord. And if you will pursue God with all of your heart, I can truly tell you that you will find him. If we look at Hebrews 11.6, nothing is said in that passage about what age you have to be. Nothing is said in that passage about how long you pursue Christ or how long you've walked with Christ. Nothing is said in that passage about how long every day that you sit alone with Christ. And brothers and sisters, we shall not, we so many times try to add to what the scripture says. We shall not add anything to this passage. It simply says one thing. If you pursue him diligently with all your heart, you will be found by him. And it simply says that he will reward you. And if that is every single one of us, as we pursue Christ with all of our heart, he will reward him, he will reward us. There's a passage in Zechariah 3.10 that has met so much to me over the last number of years. And it's a small obscure passage, but it's a passage where God, through prophet Zechariah, says about a man. He says, is not this man a burning stick snatched from the fire?  We are snatched from the clutches of the devil. We are snatched from hell. And do you know what, in opposite of that, God now has a hold of us, each one of us that is walking with him. And now we are the flaming sticks of God. He has snatched us. And we have the flame of peace and passion for Jesus in our hearts. We are now the burning sticks that are called to go forth in our generation. And in order to do that, we must have that cry on our heart, Lord, teach us to pray. And when I think about that, what should it look like every day in your life? This is what it's going to look like, as you say, Lord, teach me to pray. It's saying this, Lord, this spiritual screen in front of my eyes that so often I can't see. Lord, just pull back the veil that I can see the way that you see. Help me to see from your eyes. And when we think about our ears, we pray, Lord, teach me to pray that I can hear the voice behind me saying, this is the way. Walk ye in it, that we can hear. We want to hear for each situation that God leads us to. Lord, help me to know how to hear and to pray what you're wanting to be prayed for this particular situation. And then we think of our heart. Lord, teach us to pray. Oh, Lord, help me to just feel the things that are on your heart. Help me to feel the burdens that are on your heart. And with my eyes as my tear ducts cry, Lord, help me to weep over the things that make you weep.  And then we just say of our lips, Lord, oh, Lord, teach me to pray that I could pray forth your very own words back to you, Father in heaven, that I can have power with God and with men, that they can see the Almighty God, and that they can see all that you have for them and the great provision that has come to them from the cross.   We want to pray with a deeper anointing.  He will show you how to pray and it's a cry that needs to go forth from your heart. Luke 18 has a passage of a widow that is very familiar to us and it talks about a place, it talks about a time in her life and this is just simply a parable, but how she cried out and I'm just gonna read this passage to you. And he, spake a parable unto them, this was Jesus speaking, to this end that man ought always to pray and not to faint, saying, there was in a city a judge which feared not God nor a regarded man, and there was a widow in that city and she came unto him saying, avenge me of my adversary and he would not for a while, but afterward he said within himself, though I fear not God nor regard man, yet because this widow troubled me, I will avenge her less by her continual coming, she weary me, and the Lord said, hear what the unjust judge sayeth, and shall not God avenge his own elect which cried day and night unto him, though he bear long with them, I tell you that he will avenge them speedily, nevertheless when the son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth and when I see that passage, two things stand out to me, number one, she was crying day and night and he's pointing out that if you will cry out day and night that God will hear you by your diligence, he sees your heart and he will pour out on you and the second thing he says in this passage that really stands out to me is he says, will he find faith on this earth? Will he find faith on the earth when he returns? And I believe that God is looking for people and as he returns and as he looks down, he's asking the question, do you have the faith? Do you have the faith to ask me, to teach me to pray Lord? And I just think, I was thinking last night as I was looking through my notes, I remembered back to a time in my own life when I was in my early 20s and I had walked with Christ for over 15 years at that point and I just realized that there was still something missing from my life. I wanted more of God and I just began to ask God that question, Lord, teach me to pray. And that was the desire of my heart with all my heart and I began to spend days fasting before the Lord. And I remember at one point, this was after several years as I just kept crying out, God, I want more of you. There has to be more of you than I have. I will not give up. I want more of you. And one night I came before the Lord and I could tell that my health was actually being broken down because I had spent, I didn't spend as much time sleeping as I needed. And I was not eating like I always should because I was fasting before the Lord and wanting him. Finally one day, one night, I just knelt before the Lord and laid before him and I just said, God, I will find you.  I will find you.  And I just want to tell each one of you, come before the almighty God of heaven. You will find him. I am an example of a person that has found Christ and I love him so much. And I just want to proclaim that message to each one of you.  And if that is truly your desire, then the part two of this message is for you. Last spring, as I was preparing for this and as I was asked to speak, I was not quite sure if this was God's call for my life. And as I came before the Lord one night and I just asked God, what do I have to say about encountering God in prayer to those that are in this audience? And as I looked and as I was praying, I felt God pour out three principles that he told me that I am supposed to speak forth and that is what I'm gonna be speaking about today. The three principles are this. Number one, if you want to encounter God in prayer, then there needs to be a preparation that comes forth from your heart to God and it has to be a daily preparation. And the three things that will enable that to go forward to that one now allow you to be prepared is number one, think about this fact. We can only set man free to the degree that we are free ourselves. There has to be a separation in your life from the things of this world. And number two, we must come to God from a position of weakness. Every single time that we come in front of God, we come from a position of weakness. Anything that is a position of our own strength restricts God. We have to take all of our own strength and remove it. We must have the power of God. 2 Corinthians 12, 9 says, and he said unto me, my grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities that the power of Christ may rest upon me and the power of Christ can rest upon you when you come to God in weakness. And then the third thing that I believe is a part of our daily preparation is that we need to stand and sit and kneel and play in the presence of God. And when we do that, we must always come as to the foot of the cross. It all comes from that grace source of supply and that one time in history when the victory was won on the cross. And as I stand here before you, I was thinking to myself that I really stand in fear and in trembling because as I stand before you, I will readily admit to you in my life that I have not always walked in freedom and I am a common ordinary person and I am a vessel that has at times walked in my own strength instead of in God's and I am also a person that has been a vessel many times that came to the cross for the supply but it also came with my own backup plan just in case God didn't work and I come here to tell you today that it's a good thought to think to do all these three things but in and of our own strength, we don't even have the strength to do these three principles in our life. The Holy Spirit will have to enable us to do these things in our lives. And so I come to you to tell you if I do not want you to go from this meeting together today and saying, well, this is something for some people but I can't do that. I don't have the ability to do that. None of us brothers and sisters have the ability to truly do this. God will have to be our helper. It will have to be through the Comforter, His Holy Spirit that we were able to do that. And as I begin to share some of these principles and the principle of freedom, I wanna read from you. I wanna read to you from Isaiah 42, six and seven.  I the Lord have called you in righteousness. I will take hold of your hand. I will keep you and will make you to be a covenant for the people and a light for the Gentiles, to open eyes that are blind, to free captives from prison and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness. If it is a great calling to set men free and God is calling each one of us to free from the dungeon, many that sit in darkness. First Timothy 4, 16. And let me just read this to you. This is a precious passage. Take heed unto yourselves and unto the doctrine, continue in them. And this was Paul talking to Timothy. For in doing this thou shalt both save thyself and them that hear thee. And in the NIV version it says, watch your life and doctrine closely, persevering them because if you do, you will save both yourselves, both yourself and your hearers. First Corinthians 6, 17 says, wherefore come out from among them and be ye separate, sayeth the Lord and touch not the unclean thing and I will receive you. The call to living a life of freedom is a call to separation from the world.  It's a call of a clean life. John 3, 3 says, and every man that hath this hope in him purify thyself even as he is pure. When I think of this principle of freedom and what it would really mean to be free, we sometimes don't truly understand what it means to be bound and tell we are bound. And years ago I had an example that's so illustrated to me, the principle that you cannot set men free unless you are free yourselves. We had invited to our church a ministry that went throughout the world, that went specifically with the task of freeing those that could not free themselves that are being trafficked or in human slavery in many dark, dark places around the world. And as that person was there sharing in front of us, there was a video that he said that he was gonna show us and he showed it to us in front. And as he showed it to us, I was in the back of the audience holding one of my daughters looking and watching and listening to his presentation. And this video that he had was just a short clip but he said this is actual footage of someone that is being freed from slavery.  And as I was sitting there and I was holding, or as I was standing there and I was holding my daughter in my arms, I saw out of that dark pit being lifted out, I saw several children that were young girls and suddenly my eyes, I had never experienced this before in my life before. I felt in my spirit, I could not even think anymore. I was staggering, I was staggering as I was holding my child. I was so overcome with emotion because suddenly I saw the daughter in my arms transfixed over top of that picture right there. What would it have been like if my daughter would have been down there and had been enslaved and had all kinds of horrible things done to her? And I sank to the floor and I couldn't even help myself. And my daughter said, Daddy, what's wrong with you? And I just laid, I literally laid right there on the floor weeping before the Lord by what I had seen. This is how dark it is to be entrapped and enslaved. And we, as a people, as we go forth and cry out to God, Lord, teach us to pray. We're crying that out because there's people that need freedom and it will need to come through our life because nobody in that video that I saw, they had to have people that were free to be able to free people. Nobody down in that pit that was enslaved was able to free themselves. They did not have that power. We as Christians who are free and who are living free, we are the ones that go forth to free people. Exodus 19.6 says, And ye shall be unto me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. We're called to be priests and every day has become before the Lord and especially has become before the Lord in prayer. Our cry of our heart should be, Lord cleanse me. And as we're a priest before the Lord, we take the time to cleanse our life. And I often do it right in that first moment as I bow my head, Lord cleanse me in my life. And I ask God this question, is there anything in my life that is not as it should be? John 15.4 says, Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you. And let me ask you a question here today. Have you ever asked God what things he would like for you to remove from your life in order that you can rock and speak, that God can walk and speak to you in a greater way, free from distractions? And let me ask you this question again. What has God commanded you for your life that is different than others? Every one of us should be able to answer that question. What is the commands of God for your life? I believe that if we truly go to God and if we truly ask him, he will show specific things to us that he wants us to remove from our life. John 8.36 says, If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed. Ask God to point out anything in your life he would like you to remove and then be willing to do that. And it might be good things that he removed from your life. You need to simply do what he says. And I'm struggling a little bit today whether I should share this or not, but I'm just going to take the chance because I don't want to draw any attention to myself. But years ago I learned that there was things that God was calling me for my life that was different than other people. And many, many times God did not, the others did not understand me.  And an example is from this past year in January, many months before I was asked to speak here and before I was asked to do several things that I have been involved in this year. I heard the spirit of God say to me, one day in early January, he said, Brent, if you are to walk and what I have called for you this year, you will need to be very free from distractions and you will need to be able to hear my voice and something that will hinder you hearing my voice is that if you renews you will be distracted and God told me, Brent, you dare not read any news of politics this whole entire year. And I will confess before you that several times in that beginning stage, about three times, I began to read the first few lines of a new story and the Holy Spirit came down on very very strong and he said, Brent, I told you not to read those things. Do you want to hear my voice or not? Do you want to walk in the calling that I have for you or not? And I'm not saying that God has asked each one of you that thing to do in your life, but he may ask many different things in your life that is different than I have and you must walk in those callings if you are to be the friend of God. There's many times in the past that God has said to me, as I begin to walk in, I live for years as a single person in a apartment by myself and as I would walk in the door, there was times God would say, it's food will be a distraction to you. You must not eat food tonight. At one point in my life for months at a time, God actually took music out of my life. He said, the only music you are to hear is when you walk in Sunday morning and praise the Lord with the other saints, all other music, I want just your time with me reading the word. And in order to walk with God during that time period, I had to obey that. I'm asking you today to come to the altar before God at some point this weekend and ask God, what are the specific things that you have for my life? Matthew 5.23 says, therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar and there remember it, set thy brother hath ought against thee, leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way, first be reconciled to thy brother and then come offer thy gift. And this is in the context of being reconciled to our brother, but I look at this passage and I just look at those first lines where it says, therefore if thy bring thy gift to the altar, every time that we come before the altar of God, the cry should go up from our heart and say to God, what do you want me to change in my life? Is there anything today that you want to change in my life? And now I really can't go on and go to my next point unless I address one serious thing yet because this goes with the principle of freedom. And it's this principle of sin. We cannot have sin in our life if we are going to be a free people. It's so very simple. All we have to do is as we come to the altar, we need to just confess before God, Lord, I'm a sinner. And is there any sin in my life that has not been confessed that I have not thought of? And God will immediately clear that before you in between you and him. It has been paid for. It has been bought and paid for on the cross years ago. It's already paid for. We just need to simply confess it. Revelation 12, 10 says, and I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, now has come salvation and strength and the kingdom of our God and the power of his Christ for the accuser of our brethren is cast down which accused them before our God day and night. And the reason sin is so serious in our life is because as we come to God in prayer, if we come to God with any sin in our life, then the devil has an inroad to hinder our prayers. If you study prayer, you will realize that prayer operates in the legal realm. It is like coming before a throne or it's before like coming before a judge. We come before almighty God and we ask God, Lord, I ask you to work in this situation. But you know what? The dark forces are there also. And if they can find anything in your life that they can legally say to God, you may not work in this life because Brent has this in his life that is not in tune with you and is not in line with you. And I say that of myself, but of each one of us, as we come before God, if there's something in our life that can hinder our prayers, you better believe that the dark forces will try to use that to every advantage and an example from Scripture that shows this very plainly was in the Old Testament as the children of Israel went to conquer in the land of Canaan. And at first at Jericho, they had a very great victory. But we know as they went on and as they went to AI, there was a man that was named Achan that had previous to this, had stolen something that he should not have. God had said, don't take anything from the city that you are conquering. You must not take anything. You must destroy it completely. And he did not listen to the word of the Lord. And he hid that thing. It was like hiding a sin under his tent. And I think to myself, and we see from this example in Scripture that they did not have the results that they thought that they were going to have. They had destruction. They had many people that were killed. And I think to myself, what if they were to come back from that battle that they had lost? And they would just said to themselves, maybe we just need to pray a little bit harder. Maybe we just need to pray a little bit longer. We just need to dwell with God. We need to sit in His presence. You know what? They could have spent many, many days and many, many hours praying. And it would not have changed what was the reason that was blocking their prayer because Satan had a legal right to defeat them. He had a legal right to put a wall between the prayer that they had and what God wanted to pour out of them. They had to get that sin out of their camp before God could truly answer them. And that is how God works with each one of us. We must eliminate sin from our life in order that He can work in our lives to the greatest extent. And now I want to just come to point two. First, we have to have the principle of freedom in our life. And then the second thing is that we must come to God in our weakness. Hebrews 4, 16 says, let us therefore come boldly under the throne of grace that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. And this seems sometimes like a paradox that we come totally in weakness but it also tells us to come boldly but it is not a paradox. It is a passage that we need to realize. We come boldly in our weakness. Matthew 19, 14 says, but Jesus said, suffer little children and forbid them not to come unto me for of such is the kingdom of heaven. We need to have a heart of trust like a child. And there are many times that my children come to me and it's very precious in my life when they say, daddy, can you do this for me? And it's often things that they can't do for themselves. And just in the past couple of weeks, one of them asked me to get something for her off of a high shelf. And it is a joy to me. And I know that they're weak and cannot do that thing that they're asking me. And I want to reach down and I want to help them. And that is how God looks at each one of us as we come to him in weakness. He loves our weakness because he says, now I can work. And there's two examples that I see in scripture, a people that came before God in their weakness. One came to God in his weakness and another person came to God in his strength.  The passage that shows someone coming to God in their weakness is in 1 Samuel 17. And it's David when he went to fight Goliath. And I've many times looked at this passage and thought, this is an amazing passage of scripture because David had a prophecy on his life that he was going to become king. He couldn't lose this battle. I don't know whether he realized it or not, but the prophecy had not come true. He couldn't lose that battle. He hadn't become king yet. He could go with full confidence. But we know from this passage of scripture that there was people there. As he said, why are you fighting this heathen? God will prevail. God will go forth with us. And so King Saul said, OK, I will allow you to go forward and fight this giant. And he tried to put his armor on him. And you know what David did? He refused that armor. He realized that that armor was a strength of man. He could not go to fight Goliath. He would lose if he was fighting with any kind of strength of man. He went forward to fight Goliath totally in his own weakness as it came before God. He went in his weakness. And as you look in the passage, it says that literally as Goliath was there that David began to run toward Goliath, he ran full speed ahead, knowing that he was weak, but knowing that God was strong. And as I think of him there, as he was running toward Goliath, Goliath had a mind. And Goliath had logic. And Goliath had his own strength. And he said logically, and by my own strength, I will win this battle. But as David came into that situation, he looked at Goliath. And you know what he saw? He saw behind Goliath. He saw all the hordes of hell. He saw the abyss. He saw all the demons of darkness. And as he knew that was behind him, he knew what was behind him. It was God, the almighty Lord of hosts. He was the one that was going with David as he went forth.  That David had God reach down and take hold of his arm as he slung that sling around. That stone, that was a representation of his faith, went straight for Goliath. And you know where it hit? It hit right in his forehead, right in his mind. That mind that had what he thought was the strength of man that would conquer, but he did not conquer. He fell. The power of God came through David's weakness to fill, to fall that giant. And that giant was killed by the power of God and by the weakness of man. And in this passage, we learn from ourselves that as we come forth to God in prayer and as we pry out to God, we go in the same way. We go in our weakness. What is the Goliath that is in your life that needs to be conquered through weakness? It may be your marriage or something that is not in the way that you had planned for your life to come out. It may be a child that is in your life that is not walking with God, that is walking astray. It may be in possible situations in your life that you don't have any power to overcome. You will only overcome them through the power of God. You need to go to God with your weakness.  The devil may use intimidation, but if you will really honestly look, you will realize that he is simply shaking in his shoes because he knows that he is conquered and his days are numbered. Samson is the person that I wanted to talk to you about of a person in the Bible, an example from Scripture of a person that came and should have come with the weakness that God put in his life, but instead it appears as we read this stuff about Samson and Scripture that he came in his own strength. Many, many times we see that God did put strength in his life. He was known as the strongest person that ever lived. We see many times that Samson went forth and he conquered, but he also had some great things in his life that were not free. He lived in sin. He was supposed to be a Nazarite. There was several, there was things that God had required from his life that were different from other people and they were from the moment he was born, but he broke every single one of those things and yet he would get up every day and he would shake himself and he would go forth saying, I will conquer in my own strength, but one day that came to an end. He had dwelt in his own strength for too long and as he stood up and shook himself, the power of God had left him because it really was not, it was only God's power and suddenly he was dwelling in his own weakness and we know the story that he was conquered and he had his eyes gouged out and in that time period God used that to work in Samson's life and it's a powerful thing if we read one of the last things that we read about Samson and Judges 1628 and Samson called unto the Lord and I believe that he was calling to God. He had finally come to minister before the Lord from a point of weakness rather than from his own strength and it says, and Samson called unto the Lord and said, oh Lord God, remember me, I pray thee and strengthen me, I pray thee only this once, oh God, that I may be at once avenged of the Philistines for my two eyes and he came in his weakness and we know the story that through the power of God and through the weakness that he now had in his life, he was able to push the pillars over and to once again fight for God's army and for God's anointing and for God's conquering of those wicked people. So we come as a weak vessel. We come before God as a weak vessel every day knowing that it's not our own strength but it's God's strength. Something that has affected me from years ago was a tape that I listened to that had the story of a man named Ken Jacobs that was a Bible translator to the Chamula Indians and something that he said has stood with me for years and years and years and he said that as he was translating the Bible and at the same time, like all of us, he was dealing with his own life and his own inabilities to truly live up to all that God had for him and he says that as he was translating the Bible one day, he suddenly was just brought to the cross and he just said, oh God, can I only sin? He wanted to do right but yet he saw so many weaknesses in his life and he said that God said to him right in that moment of time, he said, I'm glad you finally realized that. I've known it all along and God knows each one of us. David in Psalms one of three says, for he knoweth our frame, he remembereth that we are dust and that is a great comfort to us because God does know our weakness and he knows that we have weakness and we need to simply come before him and just admit it.  Most gladly, therefore, will I rather glory in my infirmities that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  And then this just brings us to the third point that I believe God spoke to me months ago and he just said this, we must come to prayer always as coming to the foot of the cross. 1 Corinthians 2, 1 through 5, and maybe I'll just read that passage to you tonight or today. 1 Corinthians 2, 1 through 5 says, and this was Paul writing, and I, brethren, when I came to you, came not with excellency of speech or of wisdom, declaring unto you the testimony of God, for I determined not to know anything among you, save Jesus Christ and him crucified. And I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling, and my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the spirit and of power that your faith should not stand in the wisdom of man, but in the power of God. As we come to Christ and as we come every day before him in prayer, we must come as coming to the cross.  It is all of Christ's power. It is none of our power. I read a story in the past year. We've been reading through the lives of great Christians to our children. And I read a story that so illustrates the power of God. And it was, I don't want to draw any attention to a person's life. I want to draw only attention to God, but this was a story about a lady that I had never heard of before named Irene Rebster Smith, and God called her in a dramatic way to go to Japan. And she worked in that place for her whole entire life. And as she was there, she began to build orphanages because she saw the needs of young girls that were in that place. There was a lot of wickedness in Japan. And she began to go before the Lord and ask God what she could do to alleviate what she saw in front of her that was a great scourge and sin in the land. And she began to build orphanages for young girls. And she had an orphanage, and the orphanage that she was leading, it came crashing to the ground one night in a storm. And they were saved, but it was not repairable. And so they began to build a new orphanage. And as I was reading that story about Irene Rebster Smith, I read something that just challenged me to my core. And she was building a new orphanage and a new place, and they needed water. And they had limited resources to pay for the water for the drilling of the well and for the orphanage. And as they began to drill, she hired a local well-driller to begin to drill, or to, in that time they actually didn't drill, they dug their wells by hand. And they began to go down, they went down 30 feet, they didn't find water, and the well-driller reported to we haven't found water, and she said, keep digging. And they went down 60 feet, they did not find water. They went down 100 feet, and by now the well-driller said, this is a very, very deep well. This is deeper than any well in this whole area. And we still have not found water. We must move to another place. And Irene Webster said to him, she said, I am not to waste any of the Lord's money. We must keep digging. And he shrugged his shoulders in desperation because she was not listening to what he said. She said, God will bring water in this well. And so he continued to dig. And he went down 132 feet. And he came to her with a smile on his face. And he said, now I know we must quit digging this well because we have hit solid rock. And she said to him, and I believe it was her faith in God, her strong faith in God, she said to him, well, praise the Lord. Because just this morning, I read a passage about how Moses, in the Bible, and the God that I serve, as Moses struck the rock, water came forth from this rock. So this is a confirmation that God is going to put water in this well. You're going to need to get someone drill through this rock as water can come in. And then it says, in that book that I read, she said that she rode her bicycle off into the brush. And she said, God, I have just proclaimed your name before these pagan people. And will you please, by your power, show them your strength. Don't let me down, God. And the next morning, as they began, they brought a crew in that had to drill through that rock. And they were drilling and drilling. And finally, she could not keep herself away from that well any longer. And she went over. And it says that the moment that she got to that well, all of a sudden, she heard a person down in the well sputtering and stammering. And she said, haul the rope up. And they hauled him up. And water came in that well because of what I believe was the faith that she had in the Almighty God and in the provision of God. And as I read further in that story, she came to another time, not many years later, where she came into a situation where she was desperate. And she went out in the middle of the night and knelt before that well, that well of water that she knew God had provided, that great provision of water. She knelt down before that well and said, God, I need help. I need help. I need provision for this situation. I am in a desperate need. I have to have an answer. And you brought water in this well. And I believe that your provision is real. And you will provide for my situation.  And then she went back to her orphanage with her children and with her young girls and committed it to God. And within 24 hours, her cry and her prayer was answered. And when I look at that, I just think of each one of us as we come before God. We come before God, the almighty provider. We come before the well of great water. It is all of God and none of us. John 7, 37 says, in the last day, and this was Jesus speaking, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried, saying, if any man thirst, let him come unto me and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture has saith, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water. And my question for you today is this, is anyone here thirsty for more of Jesus? Is there a cry within yourself for provision? Provision for a need in your own life or for someone else? Come to Jesus right now, the well of clean water, the well of great provision. We have a God that is a well of great provision. We have a God that will supply our thirst. As we come before God and cry day and night, Lord, teach me to pray. God will pour himself out, and he will give us the provision that we are asking for. And I would love for all of us to just bow your heads before God and just think in your own mind, as I read through my points again, there must be a cry that comes from your heart. Lord, teach me to pray. You must prepare your heart to receive God's anointing. And there's three things that you can do to allow that to happen in a greater way in your life. You can't set men free unless you are free yourself. You are called to a life of separation, free from all hindrances of the world. Come to Christ in weakness. Let no form of your own strength restrict his work. Come to the foot of the cross. Come in the name of Jesus. Come to the great provision of God. And just ask yourself this question. Are there any areas in your life right now that you are not living separated from the world? Are there any areas of separation that God has asked of you that you have not been willing to surrender and to obey?  You want to be known as his friend. And now I want to ask the question, are there any areas that you're walking in your own strength?  Just confess right now before God your weakness and that you have maybe been depending on your own strength. Just confess that right now before God. Let him take away that burden of trying to live in your own strength. And then right now as we just dwell in the presence of God, let us just come as to the cross, that great source of supply, that great source of provision, like Irene Rebster, let us just kneel before the well of God, which is the cross. Let us kneel before the cross. And as we're kneeling before the cross in our minds, let us just think about the blood that was spilled from Jesus Christ, who was nailed to that cross. And as that blood ran off of his body and dripped, each one of us is under that cross that has accepted Christ as our Savior. And that blood is washing away our sin. That provision that God made is washing away our sin. Come to the cross before God, that great cross of provision. And now I'm just going to pray for all of us together that we can have more of that in our life. God, we just come before you. And Father, we come in our weakness before you. Father, we desire to set men free. And God, we desire to know and learn how to pray. Lord, we just come to you today as to the cross of great provision. And God, we pray that you would pour out on each one of us refreshing from the very throne of grace. And Lord, help each one of us to take what you give us and take it freely. And come to you with joy this morning. Lord, we thank you so much for your great provision of the cross.  Lord, make them clean. And as we're driving to work each day, those few moments that we have of solitude, Lord, may we surrender those moments to you that we can pray for our families, for provision, and for more of your Holy Spirit to anoint us for your work. And God, I just pray that we can each one. Father, help each person in this audience. Father, help all of us to find that secret place of prayer, those secret places that you have for us all throughout our day and all throughout our night, those secret times that we are in front of you.  Lord, teach us to pray. God, I pray that you would raise up from within this group a praying church, a church God that walks in the power that you intended for us, a church that does not hold back because we have a mighty God behind us. And we, even though we have many Goliaths and many giants in front of us, we have the power of Almighty God that is working and moving in us. And we walk forward in faith. Oh, God, when you return, I believe and I pray, God, that you will find faith on this earth. Find faith in us, God. God, allow that faith to grow and allow it to grow in my life and in each one of the brothers and sisters in front of me. And I just pray this prayer in the almighty name of God. Lord, we love you. We thank you so much for your provision. And we pray this in the name of Jesus. Amen.


This episode of the anxious truth is brought to you by me because I'm not just a podcaster I'm also an author. I've written several useful books and anxiety and anxiety recovery And I know you're gonna find them helpful. You can find them on my website at the anxious truth calm Hello everybody, welcome back to the anxious truth the podcast dedicated to understanding and overcoming anxiety issues Like panic attacks panic disorder agoraphobia monophobia and things of that nature I am drew linsellata creator and host of this fine program what I hope is a fine program. I'm glad you're here This is episode number 179 recorded in October of 2021 today's topic is Understanding the difference between following the principles of anxiety and recovery versus asking for instructions on how to recover and This is important. We haven't really talked about this yet But it's important to understand the difference between following principles and asking for instructions Because everybody and their journey through an anxiety problem and the recovery process Kind of starts asking for instructions. It's okay It is okay If you are naturally drawn right now to to look for as many Instagram posts You could find that give you seven things to do during a panic attack. I feel you I understand like everybody starts there Everybody starts by saying this is this crazy monster my own body and thoughts are against me here. I'm terrified I can't leave my house. This is ruining my life. It is beyond my control. I am powerless. Please Internet please helpers please therapists please psychoeducators whoever please give me things I can do right now To feel better. I understand you're asking for instructions and I get those questions all day long If I were to go on my say my Instagram right now or my Facebook group and ask a large number of people Hey, ask me questions. Ask me anything. I'm going to get most of those questions Probably 70% of those questions will be asking for instructions instructions So why do people want instructions as opposed to saying well? Can you teach me about what this is and how I can apply the principles of? Disordered anxiety and recovery to my situation like that would be the more productive question long term But very few people actually ask that question It takes a long time or some period of time I could say a long time It takes some period of time to get to the phase where you are actually interested in that right now Why is this and again? I'm going to use that that example of the social media post that that lists, you know For the 10 zillionth time and your Instagram scroll or on Twitter or Facebook Seven things to do during panic five things to say when you're anxious five mantras you can use three things You can you know eat that will lower your anxiety the top five vitamins that are good for anxiety Those are instructions. Those are instructions take this eat this chew this swallow this drink this rub this say this wear this touch this smell this Those are instructions and we are naturally drawn to those because when we feel like things are out of our control and we have no Agency here like this anxiety thing my my anxious sensations my anxious thoughts these intrusive thoughts these scary things That are ruining my life right now. They are beyond my control This is a monster that is attacking me and stalking me all the time. I have no power here So please give me five things I can do right now to fight this monster and make it go away I get that I get why you want instructions now instructions generally are now focused Instructions are focused on the now Give me five things I can do now Because I can feel a panic attack coming on and I need five ways Steps to stop it right now because I need to feel better right now The only problem with that and you may be starting to understand this depending on where you are on your journey And again if you are in the early stages of your journey And you are still seeing this as I just need to find a way to make this stop right now. I get you I feel you I understand my heart goes out to you. I understand you are desperate for immediate relief But you may be far enough down the road where you've been trying to do this Give me instructions on what to do give me tips any tips give me tips So I understand that if you're in that situation you're looking for a relief right now I need to make it stop right this minute you may already be down the road enough to understand that well every time I do that I can get some relief right now But then in two hours or tomorrow. I'm back again Asking for the same tips or trying to find better tips new tips more tips To feel better right now, right? So that one of the key differences between following principles and following instructions is that generally speaking in the In the context of recovering from an anxiety disorder Instructions are based on immediate relief. Make me feel better right now And I understand why you would want that I'm not saying any of you shouldn't want that everybody wants that I would want that every human being would want that But and but they're based on the here and now generally speaking. They're gonna be focused on how can I make you feel better right now? And I'm gonna throw something out here because important like I understand if you listen to this podcast and clearly you're taking the initiative to Reach out to learn to ask for help to try to try and make things better And my hat is off to you. I if you're listening to this podcast I'm gonna give you a big old thumbs up for just listening to my podcast or any podcast like this because clearly you're trying to get better And that's great. That's really great. So pat yourself on the back for that because I patch on the back for But understand as you're consuming this type of information That if you're continually going back for the well for instructions for immediate relief You can easily wind up in like a blizzard condition in your head where you're overwhelmed with instructions That's really common So I want instructions because I need to feel better right now and I don't feel like I have any power So I need somebody to tell me exactly what to do right now because I want to feel better right now And I don't know what to do right now and then if you seek out those type of instructions Prescriptive instructions again and again, you can get buried in them You can probably right now if you're that if you're in that situation and you've been kind of collecting instructions from different people like me and others online then you are likely have a very long list Special breathing things to sniff oils things to eat special things to wear. I should put my toes in the dirt I need to walk in the grass. I need to look at the trees. I need to look at the birds I need nature. I need calm. I need chakra clearing. I need oils. I need meds I need supplements like you start to get this you get buried under this giant pile of prescriptive tips and steps and instructions on what to do And that can be really overwhelming So you're just trying to not be overwhelmed and then sometimes you can wind up overwhelmed Trying to not be overwhelmed because I don't even know what to do next like I have this Am I supposed to breathe am I supposed to ground am I supposed to sit on the floor am I supposed to look at the trees? What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to do? You know, I keep having these thoughts about death and existence like am I supposed to think positive and supposed to choose happiness Am I supposed to do a mantra? Should I listen to a radio? Am I supposed to what am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to chew gum? Am I supposed to snap a rubber band? What am I supposed to get ice to distract myself? What do I do? You can easily wind up getting buried and feeling very overwhelmed by instructions that are designed to make you feel better now But from a social media content creator perspective, I can tell you that the most engagement I could possibly get and I refuse to do this if you follow me on the socials, you'll know I don't generally do a lot of this stuff You know the most engagement I could get and if I want to build giant numbers of followers I'll just keep telling you what anxiety feels like. I'll just keep telling you five steps You can do I'll just keep giving you five different steps for panic attacks again and again Yeah, you a lot of clicks a lot of likes a lot of follows But then you just keep coming back to me for more and more and more of those and that can get frustrating and overwhelming So if that's the situation you're in your your instruction base right now I get you and I understand that that's starting to be overwhelming or you're starting to feel like I don't understand This isn't working. So you're getting discouraged. I can't get better. I'm clearly something is wrong I'm never gonna get better because all of these instructions don't work for me or they don't work consistently for me I understand why I get you I feel you you can get better. I know you can So let's start to change our focus now from here and now Prescriptive discrete instructions step one two three four five do this to feel better now Instead of going that let's let's take a step back and say, okay What if we look at it a different way when I start to play these guitars behind me? And if you're not watching on video, there are guitars behind me and there always are in these things But when I start to learn how to play these things I need my teacher my teachers to tell me where to put my fingers Just just show me where to put my fingers so I can play a D minor chord Just just tell me just tell me what I put my fingers and I'll just put them there and I'll strum And I'll have a D minor chord then tell me where to put my fingers for an a minor chord Then tell me where it had it then tell me how to do an F bar chord You know then tell me how to do try it in versions. Where do I put my fingers to do all these inversions? Okay, I mean I could ask for instructions there But sooner or later that's going to get really old and ineffective Because if I want to start to actually either write my own music or play songs that you hear on you know Whatever your favorite music. I can't ask my teacher to tell me well now what are my fingers now? Do we do it now? Wait or I do it now wait or I do it? It reminds me of a story when I was a little kid and this sticks in my head I remember I could have been more than maybe four years old five years old Probably even younger and I sat in the kitchen with my mom And I wanted to write a letter to my friend a letter adorable, right? But I I did not a spell anything You know, I was I was really lit. I was really low. It's probably closer to three or four And I remember I had to ask her how to spell every single word and God bless my mom Like how she didn't jump out the window of our apartment at the time is beyond me Like she should have easily just run out screaming and asked for help because I was making her nuts But I had to ask her how to spell every single word now. I was a kid I was a little I don't understand the principles of grammar and sentence construction So that's a little, you know, it doesn't exactly apply But I remember that very clearly and then as I got older and I started to understand Letters and writing and how to make words and sentences I didn't have to ask my mom how to write every letter and word of a to write to my friend anymore, right? So the same thing happens here same thing happens here When you start to step back and say well, let me start to really think about Understanding what the nature of this problem is let me think about really starting to understand Even though I don't like to hear these things like why is this guy keep talking about doing hard things? Why does he keep talking about facing my fear? Why does he keep talking about surrendering to the worst outcome? Like why do I have to you know accept it? This sounds crazy to me But sometimes you have to stop and say okay Well, let me just separate myself from instructions designed to make me feel better right now And maybe I got to learn a little more about what this thing is And you either sometimes have to decide make a conscious decision to do that I'm gonna step back and start listening to this now I'm gonna have to start learning the principles of this so that I don't have to ask every single time I have a different thought or sensation what to do Right, I'm gonna learn what disordered anxiety is I'm gonna learn the principles of how it operates I'm gonna learn the cognition underneath that I'm gonna learn like well This is the overriding principles that we use to deal with these problems so effectively And when you start to understand the principles, you don't have 77,000 different social media posts telling you what to do minute by minute You have guiding principles that when you begin to accept them for what you have to be willing to do And if you if you disagree with these principles, you're welcome to do that You don't have to agree with them But if you are willing to say okay, I'm gonna I these sound right I'm I don't like them, but they sound right and I'm gonna really embrace these principles I'm gonna understand I'm gonna start to apply these things to my own recovery journey I'm gonna step away from asking people to tell me what to do every minute of the day And I'm gonna start to understand what I have to do so I could do it myself It becomes far less overwhelming far less overwhelming and I'll tell you why because if you are right now in the habit of Very common. I see this all the time in my in the community surrounding this podcast. Hey guys I was doing really great for the last three weeks. I you know I haven't really nauseous anymore like you were right. It really went away But oh my god, last night I woke up in the middle of the night My heart was pounding and it was skipped a couple of beats and how do you any tips for that? Like does that sound familiar to you, you know, or like I was doing so great like, you know I was having thoughts about like, you know Maybe I don't actually love my family and those they were dragging me down and I'm pretty good I've learned to move through those but now all of a sudden I'm really focused on like health Getting getting sick. I'm having intrusive thoughts about becoming sick. How do I deal with that? Sound familiar? So like one thought goes away and another one takes its place one sensation goes away and another thing takes its place You know one situation resolves and another situation presents itself that makes you anxious because that's what life does And then you have to run back and ask for new instructions Whereas the person who has started to understand the principles of anxiety and recovery would be able to say, okay The principle of dealing with it. This thought was was this so now I'm having a new thought that's scaring me and bothering me So I can deal with it the same way. I use the same principles across multiple contexts, right? so I understand the principles of chord structure and triads and Chord progressions so that I can I don't have to ask my teachers where to put my fingers to play every song I want to play on the guitar So it becomes far less overwhelming and far easier and I don't mean easier in terms of effort It doesn't make it any easier. I get smooth sailing, but it becomes less cluttered. It just becomes less cluttered however Taking a more principled approach rather than a instructions approach to recovery means you're taking on a whole lot more responsibility So you we have to acknowledge that and sometimes that seems scary or even impossible Like it seems certainly more possible to just run to your Facebook group and ask the group You know, how do I it's much it will feel easier to do that. I Understand why like I don't I don't want to read a book I don't want to read this giant 400 page book that you wrote, you know Even though this is literally like the principles of recovery and then how to apply them. That's what I wrote here I'm not trying to sell you a book. I mean, it's a great book But there's a reason why I wrote the anxious truth the way I did There's a reason why this podcast sounds the way it does and there's a reason why my Facebook group Sounds and looks the way it does Like we are so based on the principles and teaching the principles of recovery and helping people learn and apply those That you know, it matters And so when you keep having to run back to your favorite support people and ask what do I do now? Well, what do I do now? Well, what do I do now that starts to become very tiring and discouraging like Feel so weak. I can't stand on my own. I'm never gonna get better. Something must be specially broken about me It's not it's now. You're not specially broken and you can get better. You can get better But I in my opinion in my opinion in my experience in my experience with a lot of people now I've been doing this for many years and many thousands people is that principles beat instructions every time every time in The end if you talk to people who have actually gone down the road Who started in the same maybe dark and feeling seemingly hopeless and confused place that you might be in right now They I was you I was there other people that you may see the admins and mods in my Facebook group people who Recovered people who hang around to help just because they're good people right and they want to pass along that experience they were you too and Along the way they either sat down one day and said I'm tired of asking for instructions I'm gonna start to learn and apply the principles or just naturally over time They start to pick up the principles and use those So it's a natural process. It kind of happens no matter what you try and do you will start to understand the principles if you are willing to accept them But if you are going to just insist Continually that you must be given instructions on how to handle the thing that scares you today That becomes really frustrating and I understand your frustration and I feel for you. I do so if you are what you You're kind of feeling stuck on the treadmill a little bit like I can't seem to get better. I just keep going through the same advice again and again and again I keep looking for new I'm following new people every single day trying to figure this out. I can't seem to make it work I feel broken. I feel hopeless. I think I'm never gonna recover. I can never get better if you're in that situation I would tell you take a little time and Don't beat yourself up for that don't at all. I would not beat yourself I wouldn't beat you up for that like I understand why you're in that situation. I do it's normal and natural You're not a failure because you're you're in that mode right now at all. That is not failure But if you are there, I would say take a step back and say, okay Well, maybe maybe it's time for me to start to approach this a little bit differently Maybe I could take a little bit more I don't want to say ownership because that would imply that you're not you're not responsible somehow or like oh You're shirking your responsibility or slacker. I don't mean that at all But like oh, maybe I have some agency here Maybe I could stop and really start to learn and apply principles I am a but maybe I'm able to actually do that Anybody should listen to this crazy guy in the microphone like maybe he's right Maybe I can actually learn and apply these things instead of continually running for rescue instructions every single time It will make things better for you. I know it will and I know that you can do that So to wrap it up you can try to recover by being given continuous sets of instructions for every individual fear Sensation thought context of situation Which isn't terribly effective on the long run and becomes really overwhelming or frustrating or you you can begin to understand the principles and Concepts behind disordered anxiety and your particular problem and you can begin to understand you can apply those principles and those concepts across Multiple fears and multiple sensations thoughts context and situations and that becomes more productive on the long run It leads to more lasting durable recovery that is applicable across multiple live contexts And it's far less overwhelming because you don't have to look for 72,000 lists of Things to do during a panic attack like it will clear things up in your head And man, I get to tell you there's a lot of relief that comes with that if you're just feeling snowed under by all this Anxiety advice starting to follow our principled approach Really helps that in a big way. All right, so that's my little 20 minutes on you know principles versus instructions I would hope that as you go down the road and as you progress in this journey You start to head more toward the principles of recovery and less toward, you know, just asking for instructions every time It makes a difference. So that is it. I will end as always with Afterglow by my buddy Ben Drake. You can find Ben and his music at Ben Drake music comm Thank you Ben for letting me use the song. I appreciate you guys coming by Comments questions. Any way you can find me is great. I will address for a second the fact that I cannot answer direct messages I'm really sorry. I get so many of them. I know you guys want to send me emails and SPDMS I but a comment on an Instagram post or a question in my Facebook group That's a good way to do that. I'm active there and I will try to help you there But I can't answer every comment in question privately. I just can't I'm really sorry I could if I would but I can't So that's it if you're listening to the podcast on iTunes or someplace that lets you rate or review the podcast leave it Five stars if you're digging it and then take a minute and write a review because it helps other people find the podcast And then more people get help and that's what we're all about in this community And I guess if you're watching on YouTube a video, whatever it is like and subscribe I'm supposed to tell you that I'm supposed to tell you to hit the bell button But whatever hit it don't hit it, you know, it's good for you I ain't gonna tell you and that's it. Thanks for coming by. We'll see you in the next episode I hope this has been helpful and I will remind you as always from my stolen line from the Mandalorian that this is the way