Hello, everyone. Welcome to KubeCon. I hope you're all having a great time. Welcome to this roundtable discussion on the evolution of metric monitoring and alerting via Prometheus. My name is Kunal and I have been contributing to open source ever since I was in my freshman year. Currently, I'm a CNCF intern working on Thanos, and I'm really excited for this particular talk. Let's just start by introducing the speakers that we have for today's panel. Why don't we start with Julius? Hi there. I'm Julius. I co-founded the Prometheus monitoring system back in 2012 at SoundCloud. The last years, I spent freelancing around it, just helping companies build stuff on top of it, use it, get training, etc. This year, I created my own Prometheus-related company called Promlabs. So basically continuing what I've been doing, but also building commercial software on top like Promlabs. If you need that or any help with Prometheus, please reach out. Yeah. Hello. My name is Björn. I have been with Prometheus almost from the beginning. That's a fun story because I watched Julius and Matt Proud, his co-founder, creating it. I thought it's a very weird idea and nobody will ever use this, but they still lured me over. I was sitting in Berlin as one of the only Google engineers who could work from Berlin back then. Yeah, Julius was there at SoundCloud. They invited me for beers and told me the story. At some point, I don't know if it was just Prometheus or just because they're nice people to work with. I came over and then that was 2013. That's long ago now, and we were starting to work on this, and I have never stopped working on Prometheus ever since. Now I'm here. Hi, I'm Richard. I joined Prometheus in 2015. I was looking for a new monitoring solution for a network, for an ISP, but the data center also monitored it. The data center with Prometheus basically fell in love with Prometheus immediately because it's just more powerful and you can do extra math on your monitoring data, and I've been around ever since. Yeah. My name is Bartek, and I'm a software engineer at Red Hat currently. We are doing everything, observability, mainly on OpenShift. However, my journey with Prometheus started four years ago when I was in my previous job as SRE, and we were doing the very beginning rotations between teams, and I was supposed to do game engine, and I ended up actually exposing metrics and doing observability with Prometheus, and I fell in love in that. This is how my journey started, and then I become Prometheus maintainer and we started Thanos as well on the way. Thanks a lot for the introduction, everyone, and before we move forward with like some more, like we'll be talking about what Prometheus is and like how it started. So it's, even if you're a beginner in Prometheus or someone who is much more experienced, there's a base of both worlds that you can get out of it, but before moving on to all of that, I have just the first question that I have is, what actually is Prometheus and how did it start? So Prometheus is a metrics-based monitoring system that includes a time series database that allows you to monitor software, devices, anything that you can really get numeric metrics out of, and then either make nice dashboards based on the collected data or also integrate that data into your alerts to wake yourself up at night, hopefully not at night, to fix a problem and detect these problems. And yeah, how it started. So I found myself in my dream job at Google in 2012, being a site reliability engineer in Zurich, working to keep one of Google's services online and working, and there at Google, we had a great monitoring tool called Borgmon. Everyone hated it, but everyone also said it's the worst tool except for everything else. And when I then left Google to go to SoundCloud to Berlin, ironically, actually, I really liked the job at Google, but I really wanted to just go back to my hometown of Berlin after so many years. I was at SoundCloud and another ex-Googler also joined Met Prout, and we were both really missing the kind of monitoring tool, Borgmon that Google had, and we looked at everything in the open source world back then, and we're really not happy with the data model, the UI, the query languages, or complete lack thereof, the efficiency in storage, being able to deal with dynamic environments. So SoundCloud back then already had built the complete own cluster scheduler before Docker existed, before Kubernetes existed many years before that, and there were hundreds of microservices running on that thing with thousands of instances, and it was basically impossible to find out when there was a problem, like a latency spike. Was it all of the instances, or just one, like what's really happening in detail on that cluster? So we were really convinced that we should at least try to build something that is inspired by Borgmon to help both our own job, but also create something for the open source world that we could use in our next jobs and that others could use, and yeah, we basically started in our free time, and eventually after it became useful enough, we started introducing it at SoundCloud, and it was still a long path to actually make it work and convince people. I remember talking to Björn initially, I think in an elevator, and he was like, what, you're recreating Borgmon? This is totally crazy. Like, why would you do that? And I think, yeah, now he's happy. And yeah, but that really helped in the end get a totally different level of insight into what was happening with the microservices in that cluster, get way more precise alerting, and helped teams work in a totally different way than before, like even testing their own software when it got released and so on. And yeah, then we really finally published it properly with a blog post and everything from SoundCloud and others in 2015, and we didn't really expect it to, you know, we didn't really expect anyone to really get what we're doing because Prometheus does a lot of things differently than other monitoring systems before it with this arcane-ish query language pull model instead of push for the actual data collection. And like many little other things, but I think it really hit the nerve at that time with people starting to adopt Kubernetes, needing something to monitor stuff running on top of it. And Prometheus really integrating well with dynamic environments by services discovery, which we might get into later. The rest of the story basically, you know, like it got really large adoption from there. We were really happy. And a year later, roughly, we joined the CNCF. And yeah, by now we are happy, a CNCF project. And for some reason became basically the factor standard in open-source monitoring, which is amazing, but was totally not what we set out to do initially. That is in fact really amazing. And like Julius mentioned something about the time series. So like, can someone give a bit more insights about the time series for our viewers? And like, how does it sort of compare from something traditional like Nagios? Yeah, I mean, I guess I can take that. So Nagios was kind of the gold standard in whatever 2012, 2013, when Prometheus started. And I mean, it's many people are still probably using it and it's doing a good job in certain traditional scenarios. But there is this one thing that Nagios essentially is your run checks and if they fail, you get an alert. It's kind of this binary thing. It fails or not. The only kind of thing you can do is that you count checks and if like three out of five fail, then you alert or something like this. It has a bit of a time dimension, but there is no real time series in there, right? And this was, I mean, that existed a bit with like stats and graphite, which was fairly new at this time as well. I mean, it paved the road already and kudos for that, definitely. But then people always thought about dashboards, right? You write lines and onto a dashboard. But like, yeah, this vision of doing this all in one and have alerting combined with that, that was a really, really important paradigm shift. We usually tell people the cool thing is that you can do, like it's called trending, I think, where you can say, okay, I don't have to alert if I cross a threshold, if the disk is full, I can actually alert if it's getting full, right? So this will allow me to alert way earlier if there's a steep increase in disk usage. And I can totally write through like 90% disk usage if this is just constant, it might be fine, right? So this is the one thing. There's also more to that to make alerts more meaningful, like if you alert on like a curing system being behind, you can actually stop alerting if the queue is getting shorter because it's still fairly long and that's bad, but you know the system is already recovering so you don't need to alert. So that was the one big thing. You could also, by time series, you could have this whole notion of a counter where like, I mean, let's say Apache, like ancient Apache already had like this kind of metrics module where it would tell you how many requests it was serving per second and how many it has served altogether. And this is essentially redundant information if you just record and at times of your database how this counter evolves, then you can take a rate, like differentiate the counter and you get the rate and you can actually define if you want the rate over the last minute or last 10 minutes. It's so much more powerful, but it requires you to record this as a time series. And that's what Prometheus did and it unlocked an enormous amount of things you could do. And it was not just for drawing lines in a dashboard, it was also for alerting. And the other thing is that we label those times series and that was where we went from like those dotted hierarchical strings from graph rights, that's the two, a label model, which is like non-hierarchical and you can slice and dice along all these dimensions. That's really important what Judith said to really go down to certain failure cases or root causes. And this was such a nice coincidence that Kubernetes also labels everything, right? So Kubernetes came out when we were already done with the Prometheus prototype essentially and the Kubernetes people, they could have noticed what we're doing with Prometheus, but they didn't know it. It was an open repository, but nobody knew it. And then it came out, it both was like Greek words, Kubernetes and Prometheus, they are both 10 letter words. So you could say K8S and P8S. The logos are like exactly complementary colors, orange and blue. So for anybody outside, it looked like this was designed on purpose to work together and to fit together, but it's not true. It's like really converging evolution, essentially. And also like you can do a lot of Prometheus monitoring for non-Kubernetes systems. Like at SoundCloud, we did it for our own homegrown orchestration platform, but you can do it, use it for everything. It's not, it's really separate developments, but it played perfectly together. And that's also, I guess, the reason why the first two projects in the CNCF are Kubernetes and Prometheus. Absolutely, and yeah, go ahead. So I just want to make one shout out to Sevix, because even back then, it was doing time series. It was pole-based, at least mainly. You could also do push. It allowed you to do basic math. Still, Prometheus blew it out of the water. But already back then, you had something which was, it has all the main things, but not as nicely integrated as Prometheus did. Yeah, absolutely. That was a really good explanation for why Prometheus started, what it is. But I'm currently like, let's say I want to use my, let's say I have a Java application. So if I want to use Prometheus, then how do I actually send the metrics to Prometheus? So how does that usually work? And that's why Prometheus is very unique in this field, because you don't actually send metrics to Prometheus. Prometheus collects that metric value from your application. And this is the sometimes controversial discussion between pull and push model. So Prometheus is primarily a pull model here. It allows you to configure certain scrape targets and certain interval with how often you collect certain metrics. And with simple HTTP endpoint page that you expose in each of your applications, you just point Prometheus to those endpoints and Prometheus will collect this data from those endpoints periodically. And this is essentially how Prometheus collects in the regular intervals the values of your metrics that are exposed within your application. And that was pretty novel back then when Prometheus started because everyone used to something called like black box or close box monitoring where, for example, in Nagios, you are creating scripts around your system that checks from outside what is happening within your application. Right now, there is this direction of exposing more observability kind of signals within your application. So maybe you can count your queue sizes, HTTP requests and server latency, and stuff like that, which is extremely important. And you do that by not pushing this data to some monitoring system, but actually just allowing some other system to collect it. And Prometheus leverage that. This, well, this might mean that the code has to be instrumented, like you need to use some client library and there are plenty of libraries for the major languages available and supported by either community or Prometheus maintainers. But at the end with this, it's much, much easier and more efficient than pushing metrics because you don't need to worry from the client perspective on the application into how to handle failover scenarios, rate limits, retries, how you do your buffer this data. Essentially, you can perform pretty stateless applications and have reliable monitoring on top of that. This also allows you to simplify discovery and configuration, so make it kind of top-down discovery. And I think Julius, you can tell more about that. Yeah, so once you have those applications that have instrumentation, like an HTTP endpoint where Prometheus can pull metrics from, the next question is, how does Prometheus know where it should pull from? Obviously, the simplest way would be to just statically configure some endpoints in your Prometheus configuration, but that worked maybe 20 years ago when you have these static database servers and a web server and they never change. Nowadays, you have cloud instances popping up, going down, you have Kubernetes on top, you have on top of that Kubernetes like many changing microservice instances. And the key here is service discovery. So Prometheus can integrate with different types of service discovery in your infrastructure. The most prominent one would be the Kubernetes service discovery where it continuously talks to the Kubernetes API server to get a constantly updated view of what should exist in the world, right? So for a monitoring system, it's really important to know what should be there and what is it. And so Prometheus uses service discovery information. Let's go with the Kubernetes example, but there's others to know what should be there, how do I pull from it? And then also enrich the pulled time series data with information it got from service discovery. So it will know what kind of pod it's pulling from in Kubernetes, for example, which kind of environment is in what's the pod name, et cetera, et cetera. And yeah, that just really helps Prometheus deal with these dynamic environments and allows you to define alerts when Prometheus is trying to pull from something that currently should be there, but isn't, because Prometheus will also notice that automatically. And yeah, so there are service discoveries integrated in Prometheus for instances of the different cloud providers for Kubernetes, Mesos, DNS, ZooKeeper and some other ones. And there's also an interface to plug in your custom one. And potentially if you are missing a built-in service discovery in Prometheus that is for something really popular, we might be able to include it in Prometheus itself. And this also has a political angle, of course, while we have that system which allows you to nicely transport your metric data, this is inherently tied to the name of Prometheus. And we got hundreds back then, thousands these days of integrations and exporters from people running their own stuff or instrumenting their own stuff, writing their own exporters, of course they needed it for their own things, yet there was this political angle of completing projects or competing vendors not wanting to report something which carried the name of Prometheus. Which is why Open Metrics was started, which is basically an effort to standardize the Prometheus exposition format with some slight changes. And it's been, that concept has been in use for like five years now. We are actually, and I'm really meaning this, we are close to publishing the actual draft within the ITF. Just yesterday night we finished the to-do list. So we have the final publishing. So what is this? It's basically just taking Prometheus exposition format, taking all that goodness, putting it into its own thing so you don't have that political angle of supporting something from a competing product, while also allowing you to have an official standard within ITF where you can just say, okay, RFC one, two, three, please support us. Which is especially important when you come to networking hardware or more traditional vendors. Of course they usually work on ITF standards, at least in the networking space. So this is why I started this because it's just important to not only have Prometheus as this super nice, efficient, powerful data engine and framework for doing your observability, but also permeating this concept of label-based metrics throughout the whole ecosystem, throughout this industry and other industries. And that's basically the intention behind this. And I think it's kind of working, which is super nice. And again, within weeks we will actually publish the standard, no, really, yay. Yeah, that was, that's really helpful, but like Bartek mentioned about the pull versus push mechanism. So what if the question that I have, even from the viewer's point of view, so how do I actually fetch the data and actually visualize the data that I have collected? So how does that usually go? Yeah, so there is a query language called PromQL in Prometheus, which really forms the heart of building alerts, building dashboards, but also doing ad hoc debugging, digging around in your data. And the query language was initially inspired by what we were used to in Pokemon at Google. And now it's, of course, not exactly the same, but it uses similar principles. And it is not a SQL-like language like you would find in some other time series databases, but a more functional language, which just allows you to select data and then wrap more and more and more transformations around the selected data. And I think some of the core features that really make it powerful is that you can do math between whole sets of time series, for example, dividing a whole set of error rates by a whole set of total rates, for example, automatically joining them on either completely identical label sets or related label sets, so there's modifiers you can use. So it allows a level of insight and math between time series that wasn't really seen before that. It is admittedly, it has some sharp edges and is different from what people are used to in previous languages, but I think it really pays off and it allows you to do very precise alerts as well. Yeah, thanks, Julius. And what about visualizing the data that I have collected? So there's several approaches to this. Obviously, you have the UI built into Premiere itself, which is super nice for exploring your data and which I still use quite often because it's just very snappy and nice, but there's also something which is called Prom Dash, which was the dashboarding tool for Premiere DS. And it is an absolute pain to use and to create dashboards with Prom Dash. I never liked it. And just by happenstance, also around the same time, 2014, I think it was, Torql founded or started the Grafana project initially to visualize graphite data, but there was a plugin for Prometheus as well within a few months, I think. And basically, as I was mentioning, I was trying to find new monitoring for my internet or for my backbone. And was looking at both Grafana and Prometheus at the same time and just kept using the tool with each other while mainly ignoring Prom Dash, because it was just so painful. And at some point, talking with Carl, I just realized, hey, why don't we try and make Grafana the actual default recommendation for Prometheus, which we discussed with him. I don't think Prometheus team existed back then, but within the group which was around Prometheus, we discussed this and basically decided that, yes, this is not the focus of Prometheus anyway, and having something which is taking care of actually the visualization part for fixed dashboards is absolutely nice. And something which helps the project in as much as we don't have to focus on this. Of course, these days, Grafana has the Explorer UI, which basically mirrors and even enhances what you have with in Prometheus proper, which doesn't mean that doing it with in Prometheus is still not also fully okay and sometimes the quickest way to get something done. But for dashboards, basically, we switched the official recommendation towards Grafana in either 2015 or 2016, I think. I think 15. Yeah, thanks a lot, Richie. I do have a follow-up question on that. Like when we're using like monitoring and alerting tools, one of the reasons and one of the most advantages that we can take off is figuring out and detecting the incidents that might cause some damages. So do I need to glare at these dashboards to detect those incidents or is there another better way to do that? No, that's exactly what was one of the primary goals of Prometheus. Prometheus was not only about dashboarding, graphing those data, it's really about alerting and kind of reactive work and focusing on incidents only when, and focusing on running workloads only when there is something wrong going on. So this is kind of a natural evolution when someone introduced a monitoring. First, there was no monitoring. Then, for example, Prometheus is introduced and they try to visualize some data, some health of the system. And then you set up alerts so you can actually stop looking on those health systems to monitor yourself. You can actually let Prometheus to monitor for you. And this is really, really kind of novel and amazing and kind of the way going forward because you can, as an operator, DevOps, SRE, you can focus on feature work, expanding your business instead of operating and manually watching health of your system. And you can, you know, configure, let's say, rules that will trigger an alert that will be sent to Alert Manager which is part of the Prometheus ecosystem. And Alert Manager allows you to route to the notification system of your choice. It can route the page of duty under kind of systems that allows you to send message to your phone, Slack, whatever, email, JIRA. And what is also revolutionary here is that you can actually trigger an alert on the symptom of potential incident that will happen soon, potentially. For example, you know, disk space is running low or you predict that the CPU saturation will happen soon because there is like growing increase and nothing is going down or maybe memory utilization is constantly growing. So you predict that will you run out of the memory soon. So you can actually predict that ahead of time and essentially react faster. But the true kind of value in truly automated kind of system infrastructure monitoring is kind of SLO based alerts. And this is kind of the huge ecosystem and lots of talks around tools around that. I really recommend the tool that wrote Matthias, my coworker, it's called Prometheus and it lets you generate error budget based SLOs which you define the service level objective that you care for because you don't care if one user maybe request fails. You care if a significant amount of users cannot reach your service for example for some amount of time that is maybe described in the contract. So you can alert, you can adjust the alerting to match those contract behavior and also only be notified for human response only if very, very needed to avoid noise. Yeah, that answers my question. Thanks a lot for sharing. And I just have one more question for Julius. Like what was the naming inspiration behind Prometheus? Like we know for Thanos it's Marvel Avengers and stuff like that, there's Loki and what was the inspiration behind Prometheus' name? Well, I mean, to be honest, we initially we just needed a name. So we did what everyone does. We went through Wikipedia lists of Greek gods and goddesses and all titans and all that. And eventually we did stumble over Prometheus and A, it wasn't taken yet in that relevant space. We could even get the GitHub org, of course it existed already at the time but it was not used. So GitHub actually gave it to us. But also we just noticed like the symbolism fit nicely. A, we kind of Prometheus stole fire from the gods and brought it to the humans, the outside world in a way I wouldn't say. Okay, I would say we were inspired by Google's Borgman and built something like that for the open world. And the second meaning is the fire, right? Like a monitoring system gives you insight as does fire. So it's illuminating things and the torch is a nice symbol for that. So yeah, it worked out really well. And the fact that then all these other cloud native tools also ended up with Greek names like Kubernetes and Istio and so on, that was a complete coincidence. Alrighty, yeah. Thanks a lot everyone for joining and everyone who is watching this and will be also available to answer any questions so to make sure that if you have any questions, any follow up questions, you can ask those and have a great KubeCon. Thank you, goodbye. Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.


The character of Claudius within Hamlet is presented as the primary villain indeed He is the person who triggered the tragedy initially So he is the person that killed his own brother King Hamlet in order to use up Hamlet So Prince Hamlet take power and become king and he swiftly marries Gertrude Okay, so he is very very hungry for power. He is very determined to maintain his position as king and Once he realizes Hamlet is a little bit of a threat He enlists the help of a few people within the play to act as his spies This includes Rosenstern, Guildenstern or rather Rosenkranz, Guildenstern as well as Polonius Okay, so he is very very treacherous, but also very sly and cunning He kind of hides in the shadows. He uses others to do his bidding For example, he uses Liertis as his primary weapon to kill Hamlet towards the end of the play But of course also he's sent a letter to England where Hamlet was supposed to be bound for on the ship once he had killed Polonius he'd sent this letter to England in order to have them kill him Okay, so he hides in the shadows and he even sometimes at some points in the play grapples with this He grapples with his own treachery, especially when he goes to the church to pray After the re-enactment after watching the actors who are traveling who come to Elsinore He watches the re-enactment of how he killed his own brother. So he grapples with this guilt However, he pushes that aside and still carries on being treacherous and so on Okay, so Claudius's character is of course presented as the villain of this play So of course if you're writing about Hamlet, you have to be familiar with Claudius. He is the usurper He is the uncle of Hamlet who is very very treacherous very fake And of course he also illustrates especially one of the things that Shakespeare's trying to convey which is you cannot trust people Simply by their appearances. So if you're writing about his character I've selected the most relevant quotations you can consider when writing about the character of King Claudius as well as the Word level analysis that you can do and what this shows about his character. So let's start with the first quotation So this is in the opening where we find that not only has King Hamlet really recently died But King Claudius took over after his brother's death and really rapidly married his wife and then During all of these festivities. He's very quick to try and push everybody to just forget about the previous King He says, you know, okay. Yes, he died. We're so sad, but actually let's move on Let's you know, even if the memory is quite fresh of King Hamlet. Let's move on, you know He's died. Let's move on. Okay, so it seems like especially given that he's his direct brother It seems a little bit suspicious that he's so quick to move on. Okay He states here though yet of Hamlet our dear brother's death the memory be green ellipsis So here what he's basically saying especially when he's talking about the memory of King Hamlet. It's green He is even acknowledging outwardly. Yeah, King Hamlet has died really recently It's so recent that we still can't remember him vividly, but let's move on. Let's move on Okay, so of course here we can see that he's very treacherous. He's very sly and cunning, but also he's very power hungry He wants to really quickly establish himself as the King of Denmark and as the main power within Elsinore Castle The word love analysis you want to do for this quotation is firstly the adjective dare, which of course is a little bit duplicitous It's a bit fake because here he's saying oh dear brother Hamlet, but he knows he's one that actually killed his own brother He's the cause of his brother's death. Okay, and also you want to focus on the alliteration of D in dare and death and finally the Ascendance of E in dare brother's death the memory be green. Okay, so here he's very very melodious almost when he's talking He's very controlled. He wants to present himself as a statesman, but unbeknownst of course to The audience at this stage and also of course to the characters We don't realize he is the cause of his own brother's death Okay, he's killed him in order to usurp him the next quotation which illustrates the character of Claudius And of course here again, we can see that is very treacherous and we're now seeing bits of his real character emerge Okay, so he and Gertrude find it almost exhausting Exasperating that Hamlet is so melancholic. Okay, so Hamlet is still dressed in black Even if Claudius Gertrude and everybody else is dressed in kind of nice pretty attire To celebrate also the recent marriage between Queen Gertrude and King Claudius. So Hamlet is really melancholic He's really sad. He's despondent He doesn't really want to mix in and act like everything's okay because it's not however Claudius is a little bit confused He's wondering why you're not moving on. How is it that clouds still hang on you? So basically he's selling Hamlet. Oh, why are you looking so sad? Okay, and of course that is a very inappropriate question to ask somebody who's just lost their father, but also He's just lost his brother. So he should also still have these clouds hanging on him But he's someone moved on okay, and the one level analysis you could you can highlight here is the metaphor clouds Of course what this illustrates is Claudius is treacherous the next quotation again Which ties into how Claudius is a very very Critical of how Hamlet is grieving his dad So this is really early on before Hamlet realizes and he speaks to the ghost of realizes that Claudius Was the cause of his father's death However at the beginning Claudius just finds it really weird that Hamlet is mourning so much He states that his unmanly grief it shows the wall most incorrects to heaven So he's basically saying oh, this is embarrassing.  It's so unmanly. It's not real men don't cry this much over the deaths of their fathers Okay, again, we as the audience even if at this stage you don't quite realize that Claudius actually killed his own brother We as the audience will probably also find this a little bit strange. You'd wonder hmm. You're talking like this about your own brother's death It's so bizarre. Okay, and of course what this is again illustrating is Claudius is very duplicitous And he is very keen to establish himself as the power and authority Okay, now the word love analysis you want to focus on firstly is the adjective unmanly Okay, and here he is criticizing Hamlet of being effeminate in his emotions Also, the other word love analysis you want to focus on is the hyperbole most incorrect to heaven Here what he is basically saying is that it's almost offensive even to God's eyes that Hamlet is so sad about his father's passing The next quotation which illustrates Claudius's character is now. This is when Hamlet has learnt the Real story about his father's death and he has told Horatio.  Hmm. There's method in his madness Okay, and of course Polonius consults with Claudius and Claudius decides to use his network of people to spy on Hamlet Because he also is not entirely convinced that Hamlet is mad. Okay, so this is now where we find the spy side of Claudius Okay, and of course he enlists the help of Polonius He enlists the hope of the help of Guildenstern Rosenkrantz and so on to spy on Hamlet because he doesn't quite trust him Okay, now he states when he's talking to Polonius and telling Polonius Hey, make sure you keep an eye on Hamlet madness and great ones must not Unwatched go so here especially when he mentions great ones. He's been really sarcastic He's saying oh, yeah people who are really powerful and great if they go mad You know, we should we should witness and monitor them. Okay, so of course here He's mocking Hamlet a little bit because he believes the opposite of Hamlet. He actually doesn't really respect Hamlet Okay, and also the other word of analysis is Assenance of you in must and unmatched. Okay, or rather unwatched. Okay, so here he again He's spying. He's getting people to spy on Hamlet. Okay, and finally, of course the verb unwatched Which is he's basically instructing Polonius. Please spy on Hamlet Let me know if he's actually mad because he is very keen on maintaining his power and eliminating any threats And now he's starting to get a little bit threatened by Hamlet's behavior The next quotation which I can tie to Claudius's character is once he's watched the reenactment of his own betrayal of his brother He storms out. He then goes to church and prays and he's praying to God This is the first part where we generally see elements of guilt within Claudius. Okay So even if he is power hungry, even if he's really happy that he's king He still grapples and struggles with the idea that what he had to do Which was kill his own brother and don't forget of course He went against the notion of divine right of kings Which is the idea that kings are directly appointed by God in order to carry out God's will so anybody who commits an act of treason Basically killing the king is directly acting against God. Okay, so Claudius has that in the back of his mind It's thinking or I acted against God as well by killing my own brother and he states when he's trying to pray He states this cursed hand ellipsis is there not raining off in the sweet heavens to wash it white as snow. Okay Now here we can see that he is this at the adjective cursed Which is he's talking about his hands which he used to kill his brother.  He's wondering will God ever forgive me and the other quotation Which you can bear in mind related again to him grappling with this feeling of guilt, right? He basically states when he's praying to God.  It's just overbearing It's like a strong terrible stinking odor that can't escape him and it goes this odor can be smelled everywhere All the way up to heaven again What this is illustrating is Claudius does understand that he went against the divine right of kings by killing King Hamlet And he's wondering can God ever forgive me, okay? And the word love analysis you want to focus on with this quotation here is firstly the words rank and smells Okay, this is to do with especially something that smells rank. It's terrible and this belongs to the semantic field of scent But also this idea of his hit the smell of his terrible actions go all the way up to heaven. This is hyperbole, okay? So here we can see that Claudius is Grappling with the guilt of killing his own brother.  He just he can't really get into the prayer He can't connect directly with God because he states my words fly up my thoughts remain below So he's basically saying okay, even if I'm praying to God my thoughts are still here And of course also we can see that this shows a disconnect between God and Claudius He knows that he can't really pray to God God doesn't have he's not in God's air because he's not the right person Who's ruling and he's done something which is a terrible act of betrayal both against his brother, but I really against God Okay, the word love analysis you want to focus on here Which obviously emphasizes how evil he is seen even by God to be is firstly the repetition of my in my words My thoughts and also the juxtaposition of up and below which is an oxymoron Now we then find of course Claudius then realizes Hamlet is definitely a threat Then Hamlet ends up killing Polonius and then fleeing However, he then realizes and learns that Hamlet has come back So his plot to have him assassinated in England didn't work So he decides to use Learty's so Claudius decides to use Learty's to do his killing for him And this is when Learty's comes back at first Learty's thinks that Claudius is responsible for killing his own father Polonius And then Claudius turns him quickly against Hamlet says no no no no no no it's Hamlet and actually Learty's was your father dear to you Okay, so you ask this rhetorical question as a way to manipulate Learty's into wanting to kill Hamlet Okay, so we can see Claudius is a very manipulative character He's saying Learty's if your father was dear to you you have to do something about it kill Hamlet Okay, and also the possessive pronoun your father again here Claudius is a wordsmith He's very good with his words and he's very good at manipulating people to do his bidding.  Okay, he says Hamlet This pearl is thine. Here's to thy health. Okay, so he's got his own drink He's asked for a drink so that he can watch this duel and he's saying Hamlet cheers to you cheers to your health And of course here he's being ironic. Okay, so this is a really great use by Shakespeare of dramatic irony Which obviously shows how manipulative and duplicitous again, which means two-faced Claudius really is now the word love analysis You want to focus on is firstly the alliteration of tea in this and thine and also the alliteration of H and hairs and health, okay? Finally of course Claudius is killed Okay, so he Hamlet kind of roots him out and ends up killing him at the end before Hamlet dies soon after however when Claudius dies He does quite theatrically. He's forced to drink this poisoned drink so the same poison drink he'd asked To have Hamlet killed this is turned against him. Okay, and he theatrically says the drink the drink I am poisoned. Okay, and of course the drink a drink. This is an exclamatory sentence Remember an exclamatory sentence is a sentence which has an exclamation mark It shows a strong emotion here We can see that Claudius is terrified that he's gonna die soon and also you want to focus on the repetition of drink Okay, so that's really it when it comes to key quotations relating to the character of Claudius in Hamlet


Well, hello and welcome to understand men now. I'm Jonathan assay of Jonathan assay calm And I'm so excited to be doing this live stream for you today our topic What when a man deeply loves you? He says these five things. He'll say these five things I'll actually say more than five things, but these are five things men say when they deeply love you All right really quickly if you're brand new to my youtube channel Please hit that subscribe button hit the bell so you can be notified of new videos And if any time during this video the content resonates with you Please hit that like button so I can be seen in the YouTube algorithms really quickly my coaching is what I call heart Centered radical honesty. It's direct a little tough love and a lot of heart Occasionally I use expletives to enhance the sentence and if an f-bomb or two aren't your cup of tea I suggest logging off right now Lastly these are my thoughts my perceptions my opinions by no means do I say suggest? This is the truth you have to decide the truth for yourself However, this content resonates with you My hope is it awakens you to a deep level of consciousness consciousness when it comes to dating mating or relating All right, so let's talk about men who are in love and what they do and what they say when they're in love And before we talk about this really quickly. I want to differentiate between Emotionally healthy men who are in love versus those emotionally unhealthy men who are love in fact I suspect that the vast majority of men and women alike are Believe that they're in love with somebody or believe that they're in love with somebody Mainly because they've experienced what's known as love attachment or they've experienced the amago Let me repeat that love attachment or amago and if you're not familiar with the books attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller is also as well as getting the love you want by Harvelle Hendricks and Helen Hunt By the way, there's a link below to Jonathan recommends books all the books I recommend is listed in my description under Jonathan recommends books now Why I'm talking about these two books first love attachment This happens in our childhood where we get attached or bond to our parents or our Serigent parents and there's basically three main love attachment styles. There's anxious avoidant and secure anxious avoidant and secure Now typically we see that most women tend to be anxious or needy not all but most women and Men tend to be more avoidant. They're a little more dismissive of Love in relationship and these are the two primary love attachment styles In fact, I truly believe that most singles today who are actively looking for love who are in their 30s 40s 50s and 60s and beyond are Probably either anxious or avoidant and while they say 50% are secure. I don't buy that Okay, so why is this important to know because we oftentimes Believe we're in love with somebody when we're actually merely attached to another person Because deeper love healthier love Looks something like this at least from my perspective. It looks like this when I say the words I love you to someone my hope is when I'm saying this to someone it means I'm here You matter. We are important. I've got your back I'm not going anywhere and I only want you from a healthy place I'm here means I'm present you matter meaning that you're equal to me You matter as much as I mattered to me We are important that means that the relationship is a separate entity and we are both important I've got your back. That means when you're in trouble. I'm gonna be there I only want where wait. I'm here. You matter. We're important. I've got your back I'm not going anywhere and I only want you I'm not going anywhere means I'm committed to the relationship and I only want you means that I passionately want to jump your bones on a regular basis from a passionate healthy place That's what I love you means to me So you for most people they're either experiencing that love attachment style or the Amago is Where we try to heal our childhood wounds with our parents by choosing people that are either similar to our parents or Something completely opposite from our parents so we can heal our parental wound and not Necessarily meaning that we actually love this person from a healthy place from a healthy place And what I believe is the vast majority of people who are out there in the dating mating and relating realm Who say the words? I love you are most likely either experiencing love attachment or amago And I and I invite you to read about both of those in fact you can Google them You can watch a couple videos online about the amago By Harvelle Hendricks and Helen Hunt or love attachment by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller Okay, so that's where I see the majority now Let's talk about the minority and what I mean is those men who are actually deeply in love from a healthy place These are people healthy emotionally healthy people look like this their actions match their words They have victor consciousness and not victim consciousness meaning they take personal responsibility for their choices They know how to what I call fight fair and what that means is when they're in conflict with someone It's not about being right. It's about being happy and finding that's place of happiness Also, they have a level of empathy and empathy isn't just I care I can feel your feelings Empathy is also I care about your feelings and more importantly I care about my own feelings because I operate from a place of self-love and if you're not familiar with my book What the heck is self-love anyway? There's a link below I highly recommend checking this out because a lot of people don't they might say that they are Empathetic and yet they abandon their own feelings and that's not true empathy empathy is also caring about your own feelings and lastly transparency Transparency means if it's material to the relationship you speak up to your partner In fact going back to my book chapter one is speak your truth do it with kindness chapter two is stop fucking complaining because I see a lot of people complain about Relationships when they're not speaking up when there's something material to the relationship So many of you ladies who think you're emotionally mature. You're not either if you're not speaking up in relationship So you're probably wondering well Jonathan. What are these five things we say to guys? Well, I'm gonna talk about the emotionally healthy guys what they do and say when they're deeply in love with someone So now let's just for the moment Let's agree that love doesn't happen on the first second or third date Love doesn't happen at first sight. We can experience lust or limerence at first sight limerence L-I-M-E-R-E-N-C-E. I think if I spelled it right, which means extreme infatuation True love happens over time So what I'm about to share is something where two people have invested a fair amount of time with each other in an Emotionally healthy way and it really quickly before I get to that I just want to share one more piece is I want everyone to remember my Relationship iceberg my relationship iceberg and what this is is that the above the water line is attraction where that's where chemistry is and Below the water line is compatibility. That's where shared values blendable lifestyles and emotional maturity lies Okay, so you have to oh and by the way the water line of attraction begins to drop as you check off the boxes of these Three additional things shared values emotional maturity and blendable lifestyles. Okay, so Now let's go into what are the five things men say well I'm gonna put on my trusty glasses so bear with me because I have my notes bump bump bump You might have you pause it long enough you can see so number one when a man's in love He starts using we language we language now He might say, you know, we should take a trip or we need to do we need to go to this party Or we need to do this or we need to that men who are deeply in love start using we language instead of I Language now some of you might be thinking well Jonathan I've gone on dates with man on on the first date. He might say, you know, we should take a trip. Okay When a man is experiencing lust or limerence, he might also use we language But I'm really talking about those more seasoned Relationships, what are the things that men say once you've gotten past the first ten dates Once you've gotten past the first hundred hours of seeing each other once you've gotten past having regular beginning your Sexual relationship By the way, men don't fully commit until they have sex. So just know this it's at the time We have sex is really our point where we go. Okay. Is this the relationship? I want to explore or do I move on to someone else? This is why keep in mind men that come on strong only for sex leave shortly after sex But those ones who are deeply or are seeking a committed Relationship will go beyond the first second third time you have sex And this is when you'll start seeing or hearing this kind of language of we of we we should take a trip We should do stuff together. So that's a great sign when a man is using we language number two He knows when something is bugging you He knows when something is off and he'll check in with you He'll check in with you and it might be you know, are you okay might be something he might say He's gonna check in with you.  Tell me more about that. Tell me more about that When a man deeply loves you and cares for you He's going to drill down when you're not feeling good when you're upset when you're not maybe even in the Relationship he's going to inquire first. He's going to notice Something is off. He'll notice something is off and then he'll lean into the conversation those emotionally unhealthy men That's the time when something is off with you. That's when they pull away. That's when they run away That's when they pull back because they're not in a capacity to take in support your feelings and So this is one of the reasons why men pull away. It's not a reflection of you It's a reflection of their own inability to actually lean into deeper intimacy or deeper love Because let's face it and I said this earlier in my video this morning My short called men men in love don't fear your feelings Here's the thing a whole point of unless you're if you're in a co-dependency Relationship meaning you are dependent upon a man for something Well, then there's a good chance That if he's not emotionally healthy, but an emotionally healthy man wants to lean into your feelings because they actually want to experience a greater level of intimacy of Intimacy of into me you see and isn't that really the point of wanting to be in relationship? I mean look it for some people I get it They need financial support and that's why they're in a relationship, but we no longer live in that type of situation I mean certainly women are have the capacity to take care of themselves So unless you're coming from a co-dependent place Don't you want deeper intimacy in a relationship? And that's what I'm leaning into today So a man will check in with your feelings because he's he's capable of going into deeper intimacy with you Okay, number three He pays attention to your needs and he says something like this He says I'll get that for you So let me give you an example I was in a relationship some years back with a woman who had a two big dogs. She had two big golden retrievers I think one was 90 pounds and the other was 85 pounds or maybe one was 100 pounds And the dog food came in 50 pound bags And I witnessed her buy dog food a few times and we're already in a relationship now And she struggled carrying it in and of course I helped her Well, it finally got to the point because I cared for her because I loved her I said hey, can I go to the store and get that for you? When a man deeply loves you and sees you're in need He'll go do things for you like buying the dog food That's a 50 pound bag or maybe it was a 25 pound bag But I this work could have been 50 or 100 pounds and I went and did that for her That's a man who's demonstrating true love and he'll say I'll get that for you As an example of things that men will say when you need something and they actually Get go ahead. You don't even have to ask Men who are deeply in love Recognize when you need something and they lean and they say I'll do that for you I'll get that for you. They lean and I'll take care of that for you. Okay number four They start doing the things you do they start doing the things you do and let me give you another example this same Relationship I was with you know with this woman. She would always yelp Restaurants before we went out to a restaurant.  Anyway When I was with her this was something she would do So then it got to the point even before I picked a restaurant for saying hey We're going out to dinner to such-and-such place. I would yell bit ahead of time I would yelp it to see the reviews and that's something a man does It's not something he says, but that's something a man And that's an example of what a man will do He'll start doing the things that you already do so whether it's yelping. I'm trying to think of some examples Whether maybe it's yoga. Maybe it's hiking some of the things you like to do They're gonna start leaning into and say hey, let's go hiking together They're gonna lean into the things you like to do or the things you need to do in this particular case That was a need for her and it became her need became my need and that's a great example of demonstrating deep love And then finally number five he invites you He invites you into his life He invites you into his life with his family.  Would you like to come to my family event? Hey, my friends are throwing a party. Would you like to come? This is when a man starts demonstrating deep care deep love when he starts doing these things now Are these absolutes meaning are these going to be you know a Guarantee that your relationship is going to be successful by no stretch of the mean by no by no means is this a guarantee However, here's the one thing I've observed women come to me come I mean Regularly complaining about their relationships and as I ask deeper questions I find out that they're really not in alignment with each other and more so they don't Communicate healthy with one another truly healthy Relationships have to come from healthy people and emotionally unhealthy people or emotionally stunted people Struggle being in relationship From a healthy way and everything I'm talking about is my hope is is to invite you to be in more of healthy Relationships, this is one of the reasons why ladies, you know my language You know what I'm about to say next before the penis goes inside the vagina You better be reading the book eight dates by doctors John and Julie Gottman eight dates by doctors John and Julie Gottman and the reason why you want to read this book and buy two copies is because Before you get truly investing another human being before you become Attached to the wrong person or before you choose someone like your mother or father You better find out if you're on the same page And I will tell you nine out of ten people that you date are most likely not on the same page as you This is why in my private coaching I teach you how to ask the better questions to vet for Compatibility and emotional maturity and if you need help with that check out a link to a free discovery Call with me to see if working with the coach is right for you All right, just to recap those five things and we're gonna take questions now once again. He starts using we language He knows when something's bugging you he knows it and he checks in with you and says tell me more about that He pays attention to your needs in life like like the dog food story And he says I'll get that for you and he starts doing the things that are important to you and Lastly he invites you into his life his family his friends his work and that's how you know You're moving in the right direction And if you have any stumbling blocks here, you may want to check in with me to see if I can help you in your Relationship or help you determine to get out of your relationship All right Well, that's the content portion of our live stream today now. We're gonna get into the Q&A So if you know my format, it's real simple if you have a question post the word quest write the word question Then post the question there after or you can purchase a super sticker or super chat Now here's the thing all the monies that and by the way, there's a little link there for super sticker super chat All the monies from a super sticker super chat goes to a scholarship fund In the name of my son Connor Asley, that's a picture of him right there those who know me know my son passed away three years ago and In his honor, I've started the scholarship fund to help the defray the cost of personal development In fact in this week alone, I have given out over $1,700 worth of scholarships actually a thousand dollars went to the Hoffman process the Hoffman process late just donated that this morning from all the super stickers and also I gave someone a 20% discount on my coaching because they qualified for it So that's where the scholarship money comes from from the super stickers to super chat So I really would appreciate you supporting the Connor Asley scholarship fund All right, let's jump into the questions and we're gonna start with Melissa who purchased a super sticker and she says Dating someone new and we're both reading eight dates. Thank you for your helpful videos. Oh, well, thank you so much folks Here's a perfect example. I want to share with you. This is a perfect to thank you Melissa This is a perfect example. I've had so many women reach out to me saying thank you Jonathan for suggesting this book with the man I'm dating folks if a man a lot of you say well a man will discount that you know, he won't You know, he won't do this with me He won't go to therapy with me won't do any personal development with me Well, listen, if your relationship needs support and he's not willing to invest in the relationship Do you even want to be in a relationship with someone who isn't willing to co-create a relationship together? This is why when I teach in my private coaching, it's all about how to be an adult in relationships and we Here in the United States we are suckling on the nipple of victim consciousness and dependency consciousness instead of true Partnership in relationship and this is why I scream at the top of my lungs just like a child about to touch fire I'm yelling constantly to encourage people to start making shifts in their life and this just happens to be my style So I hope you can appreciate it and most under but and I want you to understand It's to stop fucking around when you reach midlife and by the way my audience is midlife Which is after baby making years and before retirement.  So that's my invitation and coming back to Melissa's point. Thank you so much for sharing that for the audience because ladies Get busy living or get busy dying Stop being afraid to speak up to men as as you might remember in my book What the heck is self-love anyway chapter 9 if it's sincere and from the heart you can't say the wrong thing to the right guy So start leaning into Expressing yourself to men stop being afraid Okay Okay, thank you so much Melissa. I really appreciate that. All right, Chrissy writes question If my guy is doing most if not all of the five things you described but can't say I love you What is that? Okay, that's a great question So most likely if you're not familiar with the book Chrissy if you're not familiar with the book the five love languages the five Love languages the five love languages are words of affirmation or for us Leo's it's word of adoration We I love to be I love to be complimented. What can I say? Words physical touch quality time Access service and gifts and most likely your guy Chrissy is an access service guy for some men It's very difficult for them to say the words. I love you However, I think it's important to discuss this Well, if you're in a seasoned relationship if your relationship is six months to one year to two years old You certainly that's the time by the way if you reach the six month mark and you're not actually Actively exploring a long-term relationship with each other Then maybe it's time to assess whether or not you are intentional about exploring the long term with each other And I invite you to invite him to be it more expressive now It starts by leading by example. This is why I can't stand the book the rules the book the rules or The feminine energy coaching which is all about Leaning back in your feminine energy and letting the man come to you ladies Leaning back Listen, I'm all for empowered energy. Let me just say this I am all for men and women being empowered, but it's not masculine and feminine empowerment. It's individual empowerment I am all about loving yourself and being empowered the reason why I beg on leaning back Because what happens is most men actually need you to lean into your feelings become more expressive of your feelings and invite him to share his feelings for him to reach the next level of intimacy and Only emotionally unhealthy men run away run away run away and the men who are emotionally healthy will start to lean in So this is why I'm not a big proponent of playing the rules-based way because it temporarily Triggers the emotionally unhealthy men to wildly chase you Temporarily and they disappear just as fast as they entered in your life This is why I prefer every one of you reading the book how to make love all the time by Barbara D'Angelo's how to make love all the time by Barbara D'Angelo's I highly recommend reading this book to shift your relationship narratives so Why so he's doing these five things probably his love language is acts of service Chrissy and if you're in a season Relationship my invitation for the both of you It's decide what it is you want from a long term start discussing it now because folks I Witness too many women spend one two three four five years with the wrong guy Hoping that magic fairy dust will make him change because magic fairy dust always does its job Folks many of you are suckling on the nipple of magic fairy dust and I'm here to say become Intentional in your life stop playing the game of fantasy and start being intentional because that's what an emotional Grown-up that's what an adult does in relationship Ah That was a rant. Thank you for allowing me to share her. Thank you Chrissy. I appreciate that All right, let's see what else we have here Jennifer says question if a guy stops doing one or more of the five things does that mean he doesn't love me anymore Well, okay great question and my first thought was it could be But the also the other thing is men get kind of lazy men tend to nest into Relationship Especially and especially emotionally unhealthy men so they well they don't just nest They nest and leave at some point but most most emotionally unhealthy men are lazy in relationship However, here's the thing even emotionally healthy men once they're settled in relationship They might not consciously do these things However, here's the thing what I have observed in the happiest healthiest couples Sometimes they get into their ruts and their routines. That's a very common thing to have happened But ultimately what you'll find is the communication and the friendship between them is Amazing and if you have good solid communication and friendship Most likely they're experiencing what I call a spiritual partnership And you might want to check out Gary Zukoff's book on spiritual partnership But it could mean he's on his way out or it just could simply mean that when two people become comfortable with each other They tend to get a little lazy with one another This is why coming back to the Barbara D'Angelo's book is so important making love all the time So you don't get lazy in relationship like a lot of people do Jennifer, thank you so much for that question. I really appreciate it All right, let's keep swimming By the way, everybody writes me now and tells me how much they like when I say let's keep swimming Um Sabrina says are you not in a good mood today Jonathan?  By the way, you can purchase a super sticker super chat Or you can hit thumbs up so we can get more people to see this. So thank you so much All right Janet says I believe many men do believe they love you when they tell you they just don't recognize what love actually is When it changes they they think they have fallen out of love and they lack love education That could be true. I again coming back to emotionally healthy men differentiating Emotionally healthy men versus emotionally unhealthy men emotionally unhealthy men are very chaotic in the way They express themselves Most likely it's because the ground underneath them doesn't feel solid There might be some chaos going on in that man's life. In fact, this is one of the things ladies I want to continually encourage you to pay attention Do you share the same values are your lifestyles blendable? And is he emotionally mature because an emotionally mature man? He has his house in order In other words, his professional life his home life everything is in order his physical life He takes care of his physical health in the way he eats and he exercises and lastly he does introspective work on himself he's constantly trying to improve himself And sadly most human beings at least here in the united states I can't speak for the rest of the world are actually emotionally stunted. This is why again, I continually recommend checking out my work I call it shortcut to mr. Right. That's my coaching program and it's designed to get you truly crystal clear on Who's compatible with you and how to ask the right questions early so you don't waste time with the wrong guy Janet, thank you so much for jumping in All right, let's see what else we have If you have a question purchase a super sticker super chat, I'd really appreciate that All right, Nicole says true Um, Jennifer says the energy in the planets is strange and intense. I guess that's what I'm feeling Um All right, let's see what else do you have a question post the word question write the question write the question thereafter So it's easier for me to find Uh, unconditional lady says absolutely.  Love your work, jonathan Thank you so much And I am says I'm so looking forward to deep intimate intimacy a deep intimacy intimate connection It will come indeed it will All right, if you have a question for me post a question or we're gonna have a short um We're gonna have a short live stream today Um, elaine says great video jonathan my dad's favorite comment shit or get off the pot mine too All right, if you have a question post the word question and write the question thereafter so I can find it in the chat box um Oh, here's one. I think I think this is a question Is it unreasonable that I require he be vaccinated before we go any further? Is it unreasonable that I require him to be vaccinated? So um Here's the thing that's a great question. We and this is a very sensitive subject So I don't want to get into the politics of this or the validity of the vaccine What's most important in this particular case is that you feel it's important to you So depending and by the way, I know married couples that are having some conflict right now I know several men in my circle of friends who have gotten vaccinated and their wives have not because They are not anti-vaxxers. They're in what's called informed. Um vaxxers And and they've read the the the by the way, did you know that when you I got vaccinated Did you know you had to sign a waiver saying this could kill you and you have to hold us harmless if it does I mean, I can understand why someone might be reluctant to get the vaccine I can I can totally appreciate that from a human being So require I certainly would have a conversation and if that's important to you if that is your deal breaker You have to decide what's reasonable for you. It's not my my job to decide what's reasonable for you I can understand why you want that and I support that I also understand why someone may not want to get the vaccine and I support that And sometimes we reach a point where we have to agree to disagree so long as we hear each other And someone who loves you is going to listen to you They may not agree with your point of view, but if they're truly love you They will hear your point of view and accept it for being true for you So that's just my two cents on that. Thank you for that question. I really appreciate it All right, let's go back here Um Okay, American firecracker question How can you not how can you not challenge a man's intellect when disagreeing with him about worldview? Especially when a man has spent considerable time putting his energy into coming up with a theory How can you not challenge? Well? I'm listen I believe the deep richness of a relationship Is is around our ideologies. I think the way we view the world philosophy to me personally Um is the fascinating part of being in relationship when you can be with someone where you can explore the depths Not just of the relationship, but the depths of world and there's going to be humans that have different ideologies I think two Healthy human beings listen to each other's point of view Accept each other's point of view as being true for them And while they may not come to a consensus together an agreement I think what's most important is to be seen heard and understood by each one of you So in my opinion, I'm a big proponent of talking about things like that actually rather early on So I can get a sense is a person open-minded or closed-minded And I happen to be a person that likes to think I'm a middle-of-the-road person that likes to hear other points of view I may not agree with them, but I'm certainly open to hearing them And I want them to hear my point of view and while they might not agree with any I want them at least to hear me so to come back to your question I don't know if I answered your question fully. How can you not challenge a man? I'm not about challenging people I'm about being inquisitive That's healthier to me is to be simply inquisitive rather than challenge And that's my perception on that one American firecracker. Thank you so much for that question Again purchase a super sticker super chat to tell me I'm doing a good job and also please hit that like button. Thank you so much Um these sets says what is your deal breakers? If you're asking me personally Um a couple deal breakers from I'm not if someone's a smoker. It's just a big turnoff to me So that's a deal breaker Someone with a closed mind is an absolute deal breaker for me Someone whose ideology is too far to the left or forward too far to the right is a deal breaker for me If it's extremes someone who hasn't healed from childhood wounds and traumas and they're still Struggling in their life with trust issues. Those are deal breakers for me. Those are just some of the deal breakers for me Not this is a deal breaker, but it must have is I prefer an empty nester than someone who's actively raising children It's not a deal breaker.  What are your deal breakers? Deal breakers are something that you can evaluate in the first second first second or third day You can it's by the way trust and integrity is something you can't find out on a first second or third day But you can find out what your deal breakers are like the ones I just shared relatively quickly and that's mine So thank you for asking lisa All right, nicole writes question Is it possible that we're both having feelings for each other but are shy to admit it? absolutely What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it?   In fact in my book.   So that's my invitation for you Also folks, I want to introduce everyone to a book called first date stories by jody kline She sent me a copy of this book and there It's a woman's Women's romantic ridiculous midlife adventures for those in midlife. You might want to check out midlife mid first date stories I posted this in my community page and you may want to check this out All right, let's go through some more questions um Sabrina says some of us are a bit cranky today. We'll stop it All right Let's see Mack I don't know how to pronounce this so the what stated is what is it about the us specifically that enables and fosters people both male and female Who are emotionally stunted? Okay, that's a great question. So I think This is just my perception. I think couple things United States oftentimes Promotes individuality whereas a lot of other countries promote family Much more the importance of the family structure and what I mean by family structure is community That's number one Number two, the united states is a melting pot of almost every other culture in the world We are we are the biggest melting pot of every other culture So when you go to nigeria, it's pretty much all nigerians, you know when you go to Uh, I'm guessing now if you go to russia, it's mostly russians. I'm guessing I I don't know that for a fact when you go to china. It's mostly chinese people here in the united states It's a melting pot of different values. So that's number two number three We are a consumer driven society. It is more about what you dress and what you wear in the julie So it's very materialistic Where it's not the same in countries where there's not as much wealth It's more about the heart in a lot of other countries This is merely my perception of the united states in relationship to the world So this is why when I continually say here in the united states Well, because I don't know what it's like to live in england and in germany and in france and in china and in japan and zimbabwe Just to name a few places But I will tell you here in the united states.    I like to be with people who are empowered who take charge of their life and my hope is My invitation for every one of you is you take personal responsibility for your life And if you're struggling on the inside then I highly recommend reading the hoffman process This is a 50 hour deep dive into exploring your childhood wounds and traumas That cause your negative patterns and your limiting beliefs in your life And if you're really willing to make a change either sign up to the program or buy this book and invest in yourself Because that's going to make the greatest impact in your life not finding a guy Because a relationship is only as good as the relationship you have with yourself And i'm here to encourage you to have an amazing relationship with yourself Esther perel who wrote the book mating in captivity said The quality of your life is based on the quality of your relationships and really it starts with the relationship with self Okay, that was a rant i'm done Thank you so much for allowing me to rant there And thank you for that question mac and terry or whatever this sorry All right luan says Do you think there's a difference between I love you and i'm in love with you? Yes I do believe there's a difference um I think i'm in love with you. I'm trying to differentiate what I think the difference is Listen, I love my children. I love my mother and father.    I'm listen. I'm just saying this for effect Of course, I'm talking about making love and going deeper. It means We matter our relationship matters. I'm here You matter. We're important. I've got your back I'm not going anywhere and I only want you and that only what you means I'm deeply passionately deliriously in love with you. At least that's my version of it. You take it for what it's worth Luan, thank you for that. I really appreciate that All right Next question. Where do you think is the best place to get to know your potential partners in the bedroom? I was just doing you know when you get a fortune cookie and you end it with in bed So we're actually that's one of the best places to get to know someone Intimacy is the bedroom is great And intimacy is how you get to know someone so it starts by expressing your feelings And inviting the man to his express his feelings if you haven't read the book if the buddha dated I highly recommend this but I want you to read another book I'll pull these both up If the buddha dated and also the mastery of love the mastery of love by don mcgill rues Great books to really start leaning into deeper intimacy in relationship So great question. Thank you so much for that But in the bedroom going back to that one just kidding. Uh, all right Janet goes google question Do you agree when relationship does not work the extra time in life is for preparation to becoming the person you're created to be To do the things you won't have time to do later Bump bump bump. That's it folks. I'm single right now In fact, I'm going to share some personal things with you right now Um, I'm not in a relationship and it's because I've been doing a deep dive into a lot of healing When my significant relationship ended four years ago I went to the Hoffman process. I went to the Hoffman process the actual physical Hoffman process Because it was time to do some deeper work. I was still in a lot of pain and then Five months after the Hoffman process. I lost my mother to cancer And then six months later. I lost my son connor to an accident Now anyone who's lost a child or anyone could imagine this This is devastating and it broke my heart open And in fact, it was the catalyst to writing my book what the heck is self love anyway And for the last few years, I've been in mourning And also real deep dive into some more healing to prepare me to be in a juicy delicious healthy happy relationship So last live stream, I shared publicly that I was doing a psilocybin journey. I want you to google psilocybin. I did a psilocybin journey with a shaman This is a medicine. This is a plant-based medicine to help break your ego open And I had a profound experience and during this time I really explored death death of my ego Not the death of my body But the death of all the things that doesn't serve me to letting go Of those things that don't serve me and also to let go trying so hard I will admit that on some level I've been trying too hard to attract a mate in my life I'm going to openly admit that now that's not to suggest that I don't believe in making effort But I might have been trying too hard And so the message I got from the medicine it's time to trust It's time to trust that the universe will bring my life partner for me at the right time That partner that resonates with me that partners that aligned with me That partner where we have the relationship iceberg where we share the same values Our lifestyles are blendable and she's emotionally mature as much as I am And that we experience amazing chemistry. That's why it's in red And I know it's coming whether it happens today Two days from now two months from now or two years from now I trust that it's coming to me and why I'm sharing this with you is there was There's more work that needs to be done even for myself and if that's true for me That's true for everyone and what I mean to say is Sometimes we might try too hard and sometimes we might not try hard enough What I mean to say making the effort I'm all about being intentional with effort be intentional with the effort In the dating process and if you need some support with that check out a link to a free discovery call with me to see If working with a coach is right for you I did mention that I had a death experience I had a premonition That someone I knew was going to die during this journey on saturday And the weirdest thing happened when I was driving home This is the honest to god's truth when i'm about to share with you When I was driving home at 11 30 at night once the medicine had kind of left my body I got a text i got a phone call from a friend of mine at 11 30 at night letting me know my friend kara had passed away I posted this in my community page And I said oh my fucking god my intuition Was speaking to me three or four like five hours beforehand One of the beauties of the medicine is it breaks open your ability to channel your intuition And i'm also the other message I got from the medicine is start trusting your heart start trusting your intuition And that's one of the reasons why i'm doing a deeper dive into studying Intuition and also breaking open my intuition. So I did a little test the other day And I was watching a football game a football game And instead of what I usually do is say to the quarterback You know of the opposing team fumble the ball fumble the ball I started to just predict what was going to happen on each play and it was blowing me away One after another after another I just trusted what my the first thing that came to my mind I said it out loud and that's what happened. That's what happens when you lean into your intuition You can actually start predicting what's going to happen This this is just listen. This is just my story. I'm not saying it's the the truth for you I'm not saying this is real. I'm just saying this is what I experienced And that's my invitation for all of you to start leaning into your heart-centered place of trusting your gut And that's one of the other messages I got from the medicine So thank you for allowing me to share that publicly Oh, by the way, if you have a personal question of me write the word personal question and then post the question Also, don't forget to purchase a super stick or super chat to tell me I'm doing a good job. I really appreciate that All right, let's keep going Kit Kat says sorry about your friend Jonathan much love. Thank you so much. I appreciate that AM says psilocybin was this what you use for your journey? Yes. Yes. Yes By the way, I was listening to the song Um white rabbit by jefferson airplane and in there is there's the words, uh, that gives you a hint on what I took so All right Um Brandy says question. Please explain the medicine. So all right really quickly the street name is called magic mushrooms I did it with a shaman and his wife You can go to other you can go to places like peru and other places to do this There's certainly place around this isn't I'm not going to talk about its legality or not But I'm here to say at least I live in california. So we're a little bit more liberal here It's a it's a medicine just like cannabis that breaks you open It breaks you open it helps to dissolve the ego and allows you to and by the way, it's psychedelic So you can have wild colors.  Yes All right Kim says personal question comfortably numb. Love you Uh comfortably numb. Okay. Thank you. I don't know what you mean by that, but yes Um Pamela says I'm a huge fan of drug induced music Some of the best lyrics that were ever written comes from like I what I shared Not in the deal. I don't know if miss valquez personal question Does couples go through this? What do you do when your man doesn't want sex? What does that mean? Okay um Well if a man doesn't want sex Um, it might be depending on his age. It might just be that he's not capable of performing I'm a big by the way Most relationships end because erotic connection starts to die. This is why again reading ester parel's work She is all about talking about erotic connection and I highly recommend reading her work studying her work So you can build that erotic connection with you To and also coming back to barbara de angeles how to make love all the time and it's not about sex Read those books and then come back to me with your question. Thank you so much Am says we are all products of the 70s. That music is the bum my new pandora channel Wait, hold on my new pandora channel is the uh Is the uh The white rabbit station the white rabbit station you might want to check it out okay Sadie says personal question jonathan Did you ever go on a date with someone that you met on a dating website only to find out that they didn't look like They're photos um well all right The answer is yes and no and let me say this.  Okay, so i've never had that But i've certainly gone out with women from their pictures where My projection of their looks was much more attractive than they actually were in person I've had that that was on my part my projection Was projecting that they were more attractive than they were actually out in person Then there have been several times where they photographs didn't do them justice. They were absolutely gorgeous in person I'm going to teach you all the secret of a great photograph right now So let me tell you something ladies I scroll through profiles I scroll through profiles We'll go on bumble real quick We'll go and most women like look at this picture Like look at that. She's got her mask on Let me tell you something men are attracted to a big gigantic smile Big eyes, you know, you know a healthy hair You want to have attractive photographs and the secret to a great photograph is to chuckle Now the camera takes a snapshot of the chuckle, which is really just your energy. This is my normal smile It's lame my chuckle Shows energy so when the snapshot is taken of the chuckle It shows up really more attractive So the secret to a great photograph is to chuckle while the person is taking the picture What's going to show up is your radiance have nice hair You know get your eyes done up and then show that Chuckling smile and don't wear a mask like this woman did because that is a swipe left And then look at this picture.  All right, you get to just to where I'm going. So thank you for that question. I hope it helped Sadie, thank you so much. I appreciate that Um, totally chill says I'd be afraid to see colors. That's the best part of a journey um All right Ingrid says you're doing a great job I enjoy listening to you and following your advice a couple times things turned out around like what you said to my surprise Yes, thank you Doug our token guy in the group. I met a woman who on her dating site stated She was 54 with 54 age pictures only to show up and state right off the bat. I'm actually 66 I'm thinking shit, but just smile. By the way, this is why it's good to do a zoom or face time date Kelly says death is the transformation to the spirit consciousness. Nothing dies. It transforms many coincidences To everyone who lost loved ones. Yes. Yes. Yes, Kelly. You are right on at least I I have a consensus with that. Yes Yes, that's right, jonathan and a live video is always nice. Thank you so much. I agree Pamela says laugh out loud the woman with a mask definitely a showstopper for her is someone who won't get the jab Well, that's probably true too, but I won't even swipe opening the pictures Um Am says I had a bait and switch first date horribly uncomfortable. Yes, it does happen Kim Jordan says white rabbit. I love that song. I'd play it right now, but that gets censored on YouTube All right Question. Is there a schedule of topics you will discuss live? Where is it? Um, no, there is no schedule. I make them up just Okay, I do my live streams monday wednesdays at 4 p.m pacific coast time and fridays at 3 p.m. I didn't do it last monday because I was still Downloading a lot of processing from my journey and let me just tell you what I shared was just the tip of the iceberg of what I experienced so um And by the way, there was four women and one transgender and I was the only male in the group out of this Six people that I did the journey with it was a blast and the transgender woman was Amazing, I love the depth that she was able to express because we get to share our experiences as we're coming down It was a blast so um Pamela says I would never meet with someone without zoom first. That's a good idea these days I would definitely recommend that Sue says so many men don't smile makes me swipe left. Yes men and women alike. Don't smile It's sad It's very sad All right All right. Hey purchase some super stickers super chats for the cost scholarship fund for conor I want to be able to give away more money to the inside group in the hoffman process. So please help me out All right, let's see what other questions we have. Let's go swimming Personal question Sex addiction. Is that normal behavior? Does that have a solution?  Because it says personal question um sex addiction listen I don't believe in normal Anymore I don't believe in normal anymore I believe in individual choice if someone has a sex addiction That's their choice. I'm not here to judge it. I'm not here to say it's good or bad. What I don't agree with are God, I don't even want to say this publicly. There are a lot of things. I don't agree with so let me just say that But people's individual choices so long as it doesn't Conflict with another human being so let me or let me just say this Everybody can make their own choices So long in my world so long as it doesn't conflict with my choices or or it's Detrimental to someone else's choices. You have your own choices. So if someone has a choice of sex addiction That's on them. Now. I wouldn't want to date a woman who has sex addiction And I certainly wouldn't want to encourage any of my clients to date men with sex addiction But i'm not here to judge the person who has it. That's all I wanted to say So thank you for that Nadia. I appreciate it or Nadia. I'm sorry how to pronounce your name Nanya business. Thank you for the four dollars and 99 cents super sticker. I really appreciate that very much Thank you so much for that super sticker um Charlie sheen anger management. I actually like Charlie sheen. So um, I'm okay with him Julie says what makes a man divorce his wife and marry a younger woman? Um Well, there's a thousand reasons why he got divorced and there's usually and the uh younger woman is because he most likely would prefer A lot of times people our own age come to the table with a lot of baggage And a lot of luggage or they don't take care of themselves physically So that's why they might choose younger women and why a man gets divorced for the exact same women women get divorced We all might have married the wrong person. That's one of the reasons why it might happen There are a thousand reasons why it happens and I guess the point is Julia Why does it matter to you? Why don't you I want you to write down? Why does this question matter to you write that down because that's the more important question Not what he does why it matters to you. That's my invitation for you But thank you for pointing that out. I really appreciate it Jerry Mitchell says this is true tired of being lovebomb told him I was done. Gotcha Jennifer says I think tiger woods and sex addiction. He went to therapy. That's what some people do when that happens Drugs alcohol sex. There's all different types. By the way, sugar is our biggest addiction Here in the united states. We are suckling on the nipple of sugar addiction. In fact that outweighs by the way Our unhealthy eating habits here in the united states is why we have such high cancer and such high heart disease We have terrible diets here in the united states. That's one of the reasons why so the biggest addiction is sugar sugar There's a great movie on netflixer. I think it's amazon pride called the sugar addiction. You may want to watch it Does anyone agree with me on that? Lisa says jonathan don't pick up on my chocolate addiction. I was jonesing for some chocolate earlier. So Um all right And nicole says very true or yeah true. Thank you so much. All right. Yes Kelly says addiction start and end it with the mind I smoked before I was pregnant and stopped because I was pregnant most addictions are choices I pray for all of us to overcome unhealthy things. Can I get an amen? I don't want to talk about addiction anymore by the way All right, we're going to save the last four new minutes If you have a personal question of me write the word personal question I'm going to share a couple things personal about jonathan asley if you have a question Write it down and then we're going to wrap up for the day Um, and just a reminder we talked about when a man deeply loves you will start saying these five things I'll share that before I wrap up today Um, okay Oops, I was trying to get this one kick cat says amen maggie says amen. Thank you so much Hey, I am am says amen. Lisa says amen Uh Jennifer says i'm a sugar addict and i'm healing it good for you All right, we're going to wrap up in a second if you have a personal question for me We're going to take our last one or two questions if you have one of me personally and then we're going to wrap up for the evening Um, let's see if we've got anything here. I don't see anything. We're gonna we're going to wrap up We have a lot of sugar addiction people here today All right, well, I think this would be a good place to wrap up because we don't have any questions coming in All right, nicole. Thank you for that. Hey everyone I want to thank you for allowing me to share when a man deeply loves you He'll stay start saying these five things and they are he starts saying we We should go on a trip together. He knows when something's bugging you.  These are five of some of the many things men do and women do When they are in love. I hope you found value in this uh live stream today Please hit that like button. Please share this with your friends If you want some support check out the link to a free discovery call with me to see if working with the coach is right For you check out my book what the heck a self-love anyway a journey of personal development self-help and spiritual work to change your life And I want to thank you all for allowing me into your life this evening I'm gonna sign off this video as I always do first off giving myself a big gigantic Jonathan bear hug of self love I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love if that's okay I'm gonna ask you to turn to someone a pat the teddy bear pillow and give it or them a hug of love Because hugs are a great source of love and let's face it. We could all use more love in our lives Thanks a bunch. Bye. Bye now. Bye. Bye


EFNN, The Tiger, Financial News Network, headline, news update. Hi everyone, Basel Chapman here, this is the Tiger Financial News Network, 10 a.m., market updates, and this is the Thursday edition, the 19th of May. Looking at the Dow down 431,097, it took out the left side low that was so important to hold, and that was the low of 32,272, this is leg D, and at the same time we're looking monitoring the DOG, which is the one-to-one short, the Dow, and it is in leg D. So it says that right here, under certain conditions, at least in attempt, at some kind of a balance is possible. So we'll talk about that in my show coming up, the target technicians hour, we're looking at the S&P, it's a little different here, S&P has dropped again, but it hasn't taken out the 38,58.67 low of six sessions ago, it's at 3900, down 23, day is very, very young, we've got that H-pattern, if you look at the SH, which is one-to-one short, you've gone to a high of 5, that's also six sessions ago, that was on the 12th of 16.38, there's a one-to-one short, the high today, so far 1626, we'll see, is it going to make a leg D to the upside, the QQQ123 hasn't gone below the 284.94 low of the 12th of May, so with all this incredible tension that's going on, suddenly there's a little bit of support that we can find, I don't want to even pollinate you about this, I'm just saying, I'm looking to see whether or not there can be a balance, options tomorrow, options exploration, if applied materials this afternoon comes out with even moderately positive anything to do with the earnings or outlook, that's going to be a big deal, the IWM, the Russell 2000, is also holding above 168.90 low of the other dates at 176.17, now gold is rallying, gold is rallying because it is up 23 right now at 1839, since the dollar, we've been discussing this for a few days, has probably made a peak F in the Chapman wave at 105.01, and now it's ready to go back into that rectangle formation, Crudol just doesn't let go, it is, Crudol is down $1.24 and 105.81, still within that rectangle formation and the TLT is actually running very nicely up $1.22, I'll be back, we'll talk about all these different aspects when I get back with the title, here she's up, it's that kind of opening called the Indian Museum, be back in a moment, hope you can stay, otherwise have a great day, have a seat.