Welcome to Dare to Dream. This is Debbie Dashinger now, and it's officially this month, 14th year. We started on radio, and then we heard this strange word about 10 or 11 years ago, podcast. And thank God, we intuitively knew enough to make the leap and take Dare to Dream there too. It was the right move to make, I would say. Nobody knew back then what podcasts were or would become, but it certainly, there is over 2 million podcasts right now in the world. So I'd say it has become something, something very notable. This show has been nominated for two People's Choice podcast awards, as well as a Webby Award. And we always rank in the top 50 of all of self-improvement USA, as well as ranking in other countries. This week has been Belarus, Uruguay, and St. Lucia. So we adore all of you who follow the show and understand the message out there and are doing your part to create your dreams and really uplift this heaven on earth that we live in. I'm Debbie Daschinger, and I teach business owners, coaches, entrepreneurs, and speakers the time-effective action steps to write a highly engaging book. I've also got a company that fully done for you takes the author's book to a guaranteed international bestseller and I guide you how to be interviewed on radio and podcast. The ultimate visibility formula. So you can be interviewed and booked on podcasts and get massive results. I've got a free gift for you and for those who would like to learn more about being interviewed and what that's like and what to prepare, go to debbiedaschinger.com slash gift my gift to you. This show is sponsored by Dr. Dane Heer and Access Consciousness. They do beautiful energy work out into the world, highly recommended in every country in the world. Go to drdaneheer.com and accessconsciousness.com. Well, I'm excited for today's show. It's always nice to have somebody on that I've watched from afar and then they come into the lap of the show to share with us their brilliance and their wisdom because today's show is a conversation on how to start asking the right questions so you can make this a breakthrough year, yummy. My guests say everything is possible when you learn how to ask. My guests today are Mark Victor Hansen and his co-author and wife, Crystal Dwyer Hansen. Mark is well known as the co-author for the chicken soup for the soul book series and brand, setting world records and book sales with over 500 million books sold. Mark is also a sought after keynote speaker and entrepreneurial marketing maven having spoken to over 6,000 audiences worldwide. Mark is the author of several books and has been a guest on Oprah CNN, the today's show and featured in Time, U.S. News and World Report, USA Today and the New York Times and Entrepreneur. For more on Mark, visit markvictorhansen.com and our other guest, Carol Dwyer Hansen is an international speaker, researcher, corporate consultant, author and entrepreneur. Crystal's expertise is in the field of human potential and a transformational life coach and wellness nutrition expert. She's seen people experience profound and lasting transformation. Crystal's research in neuroscience, epigenetics and quantum physics provides the scientific knowledge she uses to help people use their minds to help move them out of misery and into a fulfilled and happy life. Crystal is a member of the International Coaching Federation. She's a certified clinical hypnotherapist and she wrote the book, Skinny Life, The Secret to Being Physically Emotionally and Spiritually Fit. If you would like more on her, go to crystalvisionlife.com. And with that, I welcome Mark and Crystal to the Dare to Dream show. It's about time. Great to have you. Thanks, Toby. It's so nice to be here with you. We've been looking forward to it. Thank you for having us. Yeah, for me as well. First of all, congratulations on your book. I know what it takes to put a book out there and you've done several. So your book right now is Ask. We'll hold this up so they can see this really sumptuous cover. Ask the bridge from your dreams to your destiny. You're on the right show. So once they're, sorry. Go ahead, you're gonna say I didn't mean to interrupt. Was there an event that precipitated the premise of this book? Did something happen that said, yeah, our dreams become our destiny when we learn the secret of asking. Was there a secret of asking that you became really aware of that you said, I need to write this. I need to help people. As you just said, we've been blessed to travel to 80 countries, talk to great, wonderful, lovely people that are smart, well-educated, personable, even have a good attitude, but they lack the one thing that gives them everything. God only gave us the ability to ask. And for most people, that's been squished out of them in their childhood which we'll talk about. When you learn to ask, the path to your destiny will unfold because you'll find out what your right livelihood is and then you'll have the fulfillment of your mind, soul, heart, and being. So it was from your audiences that you noticed the importance of needing to ask and ask correctly. But also, Debbie, we started reflecting on it because that we spend like the first hour of our day in this prayer meditation session. So we always reflect on what's happening in life, the people we meet and what started, you know, it's struck us that people that are so overqualified were spalling so short of their potential and we're like, why? How, you know, we've been through a lot of adversity in our own lives individually and together. And we thought, we started, you know, asking, what was the thing, if we could really help someone, what is that thing that allowed us to transcend that adversity and to keep going, allowed us to overcome the problems and reinvent ourselves into something new? And what it really boiled down to, if we could boil it down to that one thing, it was the ability to ask. Asking is such a powerful tool and then we determined that there are actually three channels through which we all need to learn to ask to get to our destiny and those channels are ask yourself, ask others, and ask God. And each of those is equally important, starting, we believe, with the ask yourself part. I wanna go back to the morning ritual and I'm sure everybody would like to know when you say you spend an hour every morning, kudos, what a beautiful way to start your day and you're in prayer and meditation, what does that look like specifically? Okay, so let me back it up just one paragraph and say that we're over falling and deep, indecapatically love and we thought, I wanted a soulmate but I didn't know I'd get a twin plant. We can mirror each other's brilliance or brains or wisdom or whatever it is but we're sitting having this great dinner at Mother's Market in Costa Mesa and there's a sweetheart of a man of the cloth next to us and he's seeing her seriously, 92, he tells us and he said, do you guys mind if I tell you what'll make us the only one secret of a happy marriage? Well, I didn't wanna talk to him at all. I just wanted to talk to her but he intruded and it was perfect. I said, okay, I gave up, what is it? And because I don't know that one, I guess. He said, well, for 70 years, I'm 92, I've been running Billy Graham relationship seminars and there's only one thing that works every time. And I said, great. He's asking questions and that's our business. So I said, okay, what is it, father? And he said, what it is, is that you've gotta pray out loud with your significant other each and every day and every night before you go to sleep. Now, both of us have prayed in church, we've prayed in groups but we hadn't done that out loud and we started doing that and it opens up a whole new level of your state of being this. And because we're in the business of teaching everyone to ask and become what we can now call a master or expert, it gives you the directional compass on your life which unfortunately most of us have been forced into a job whether it's being a garbage man or a housekeeper or a business person or a school teacher. Most of you have never said, what is my right lively? What is it, I'm gonna, what is my destiny with a passionate purpose? And obviously mine has been writing books and whenever I've gotten off target, I go south. And when I'm on this, I go north and right now we're the best seller. Again, like, we got lightning in a bottle the second time but that guy taught us and like even this morning we're doing and it said in Joshua 1A, that if you ask wisely, I will give you the answer and you'll meet with good success and great prosperity and that. Whoa. And so you're hearing even what we did just today. Well, that's very powerful. So you use the book, you use the good book to start you out and find a passage or do you just ask for something that you individually or both together want to create? Exactly. We do sort of a combination of those things Debbie. So we use the good book, we use, we have some angel cards. We do other, we have other special inspirational books. So we kind of pick a theme and then we also are sure to address what's going on in our lives every day because we believe that's how you stay on track is by doing that reflection and really what we talk about in the book that ask yourself part is a reflective journey. And it strikes me all the time how little time people spend in that reflective journey. And it's really the only way we can understand what our life and what's happening in our life and understand the way we wanna take our lives forward. And so it's so important to spend that special time. We put on music, we love Stephen Halper and he's actually a friend of ours. We put on his music and we just get in this space where we feel that oneness with creator. I mean, we're all a part of our creator, we believe. We believe that God isn't somewhere way out there in the sky with the long gray beardies. The only way we can experience God in this lifetime is right here inside of us. And the only way to achieve that is to get quiet, go into that peaceful space and hold the space in awareness so that you can ask the questions and you can receive those messages that are there for you. I love that and that is very inspiring to me. My beloved and I, when we remember, so I'm being very transparent, when we remember, we do this syncopated breathing. So we'll look into each other's eyes, get very, very close. And when I breathe out, he breathes in. When he breathes out, I breathe in and something happens. And I can tell you in that moment, I feel like I'm looking at the most beautiful being in the whole world and I'm so calm and we're so deeply connected and so loving and so also part of all that is at the same time. So I'm inspired by what you do every morning that I start to adapt what we're doing so that it becomes an everyday thing. Well, that's where we're at. And obviously we're asking questions on a full-time basis to each other about where we're going, what we're doing, how we're gonna get there, how we're gonna source and serve because we're asking, we're teaching you, if you're gonna ask questions, you get to your dream. First of all, I gotta go back to one other paragraph. And that is the subtitle of the book is a grid where you dream to your destiny. Now, we believe and I know you do because of all the great books you've written that everyone listening is coded and DNA and RNA of birth to become something great. Now, I can't tell you what it is, but if they'll do the, remember, we ask yourself, ask others, ask God and they go deep in their subconscious and super conscious mind, say, God, what's your destiny for me? 400 times pushback sleep before they go to sleep. And you tell your sweetie kids, hey, I'm gonna wake up and if Marcus and Chris are telling the truth, I'm gonna have a pad in the paper, I'm gonna have to turn on the light because the idea is gonna come through and it's gonna be like a wet slippery fish. I gotta grab it and hold on to it and it'll tell you. And like when we're writing books right now, still we're in the deep of a giant, it'll be another big book for us. And it is illuminating to tell you the truth but the illumination comes through and they don't come through in a holding pattern. Well, I'll wake up tomorrow morning and remember if you don't remember, so you've got to do it the way I said to do it. Ask yourself, what's God's destiny for me? And most people then will be happy, whole and complete. And let me do the downside is 87% deal according to Time Magazine's research are unhappy in their occupational job. Well, I trained to be an engineer, I trained to be a medical doctor. God bless you. That's what you do, that's not who you are. And what we're saying in this book is you're a human becoming the transcend your human being and it can only get there through physical, mental and spiritual work. You start your book out with this beautiful fable. I really enjoyed it. It was like watching a movie as I was reading. And I was curious, is that something that you adapted from something else or did you write it from scratch? Certainly it sets up the book, right? Yes, yes. It's funny, Debbie, and I'm so glad you asked because we both love the fable too. So Mark and I decided we love fables, we love stories because it's an opportunity to teach. We learn so quickly through stories, right? Because human beings, stories all contain patterns and our brains learn in patterns. So it's just a very easy way to understand a concept or a principle to tell a story, especially with emotion. So because that locks that into your memory. So we decided to write this fable and at first we were talking about animals and then I said, you know, why don't we write it about a girl? So I took, you know, a lot of times we'll pass our writing back and forth when we're writing together. But I just took off with this fable and it was like, it was an amazing experience for me. I wrote the entire thing without stopping over a couple of days. And when I handed it to Mark, he started crying and he goes, we had originally thought that we would maybe cut the fable up into four parts so it's interspersed throughout the book. And he said, honey, this is so magical, we have to start the book with this because it gets everyone, it sets the mood for the book. And I'm so happy we did that. I've been very blessed in my life to have these amazing dreams that guide me. And so I took some of my own dreams and modified them to fit the story of McKayla. They're not exactly my dreams, but from some very similar qualities and events. So it was really, I don't know, I just, it's like that story lived somewhere and I had the good fortune of being able to just pin it down, but it was living in the universe somewhere, it just was there. Even the characters just came to me as I just know. It was just an amazing experience, truly. Yeah, and it's very fleshed out. And Kudos said that was downloaded through you because you're right, it's not just a couple of pages and ta-da, this is actually very engrossing. I mean, I loved reading it and I really liked the arc of McKayla because in the beginning it's kind of like, oh no, what else could happen? You know, I really, my heart was breaking for her and I loved how she received these dreams. The dreams definitely had wisdom and direction. She woke up first thing in the morning and she wrote so she could keep the dream close to her, but then she implemented. And the implementation, you could see her entire life start to shift just by trusting and following, just by doing. Yes, and what's amazing is when you read, we won't give away the whole story, but layer by layer as McKayla follows the admonishment of what she's getting, the messages that she's getting in the dreams, that layer by layer her life expands and by the end of her story, you don't even recognize her as the same person. McKayla is living a completely different life.  Her daily activity is about lifting heavy rocks from one place to another. And I think for a lot of people who have lost hope, like McKayla, McKayla's lost everything in her life that mattered. So she's lost all hope. And I think for a lot of people, that's how life feels. And so we wanted to start there because we want people to understand that, we're inviting you to take this journey with us, this asking journey.  Yeah. And the other thing you said was that you saw it as a movie, it's sort of unwrapped. We dream, visualize and are promoting in our minds that somebody is gonna come to us and say, hey, this has got to be a movie because you see, and then the other thing just is a, and I'm sorry I didn't mean to interrupt you, but we've had so many people and we've gotten like 120 emails in a day saying, oh my gosh, I read it, it caught me.  And we were all depressed and locked down and now we're feeling open again and have hope. So it's amazing what it's doing. That's incredible. Yeah, so from your mouth to God's ears, I already see it as a movie myself. I hold that for you both. And we've got the fable and I know there are stories in here. What about the science part of asking, is there neuroscience, is there epigenetics or quantum physics that are involved that affect our consciousness when we ask? Right, so let me tell you about the science we looked at specifically for asking because it's really interesting. When we ask ourselves a question, a different part of our brain lights up and it's the part of our brain that does critical thinking. So immediately, our own brain becomes a better resource to us. The other part when you take it to a quantum physics level, when we start asking the right questions and we start receiving the answers, we're changing who we are. And as we change who we are, we begin to magnetize a different life, right? Because whether we know it or not, we are creating the magnet for what we're getting. We are a magnet and if we're creating, we can be creating the negative, sort of a negative basis for all that we're getting or we can create a real positive pole for everything we truly want. And that's what happens when you start asking. So in the ask yourself part, Debbie, we say there are really like three critical phases to asking and those are, where am I now? Because so few people take the time to figure that out. They're just hurling along like an asteroid through space, never sitting down and going, where am I? And all the little questions that start to come under that as you start to ask yourself, it opens your mind to more questions. Do I like what's going on? Is this working? Am I happening my career? Is this where I want it to be? Am I missing something? All of these things. And then question by question you'll start to get answers. You'll start to get solutions. You'll start to get illumination. The second critical phase is where do I want to be? So few people, I mean, most people are afraid to dream. They don't dare to dream for the greatest life. And we say, when you get to that second phase, where do I want to be? Utilize that beautiful imagination that God created you with. We are the only animal with imagination. And if you look at the good book, it says we're created in the creator's image. Well, that is exactly how we create. We create through our imagination and that's why it was given to us.  And so they're really projecting that into the future by doing that, by recirculating all of those programs that run through the subconscious levels of our mind. So asking these questions allows us to break out of that. And we say, ask from the nth degree of your greatest success through your imagination. So if you're asking about your career, imagine yourself in the career of your dreams. Just take that time with yourself and then start asking the questions from that place. Who am I talking to every day in this perfect career of my dreams? What products and services am I offering? How are people responding? How am I serving? What does that feel like to me? Who am I becoming as this person in this amazing scenario? And you can do that with relationships, with your health and fitness. Who am I in my most perfect health and fitness? What do I do every day? How do I achieve that? What sort of things am I eating? What am I doing? What are my activities? Anything you want in this life, relationships, health and wellness, your career, it works the same way if you ask from that beautiful place in your imagination. And then of course the third phase of that is what steps, what specific action steps do I need to take to bring these plans into motion because we do live in this physical reality. So when we start to get those breakthroughs, those illuminations, those plans, those ideas, we'll start to flow through and you need to be writing them down. But then take those action steps. You thought of that person, go call them, connect with them in some way. You thought of a book or something you'd read, follow through on it. All of those things start to come together and soon you find yourself moving across that bridge to your destiny. Can you give some examples or example of yourselves or somebody you're coaching or in an audience that you taught specifically how to ask and the evolution that it took them on the arc of their story where they ended up? First of all, I love the question. Thank you for that. And we did 26 interviews, one of which was a guy we just met. I've only been on my telephone and by answering his emails previously, a guy named Jim Stowell, he'd been a superstar football player ready to become in the NFL, gets recruited and the doctor comes back and said, look kid, you're 19, but I'm sorry to tell you, you're gonna be permanently, totally, completely and forever blind in six months. So Jim goes home and he's locked in a little nine by 12 room in his family's home with a radio, a television and telephone and feels trapped in his complaining.  Get out of the blind and see if they've got some solution for you. What's an echo chamber of negativity? But fortuitously, since next to another blind woman, there was a court stenographer and he says, you know, I used to love to watch TV and now we can't see anything and see if somebody threw a right hook or screeched out. Somebody ought to do something.  Well, long story compressed, they now have 14 million blind people paying $10 a month. It's one of the biggest services like Netflix or anything in the world. And you've never heard of it because you're sighted and most people watching and listening to us are sighted, but they run narrative TV. Well, along comes Charlie Trench Jones, who's been one of my close friends. We've talked to 10,000 people on the Amway together and he says, look, Mark, I know you're selling 15 million books a year, but and you're busy, but you've got to read Jim Stovall's book and I never heard of Jim Stovall. And he says, you've got to read it and write the port to it and endorsement. I've only asked you for one favor my whole life and I've done you a lot of favors. So I said, okay, I read the book and I said to him what you said to us. I see this as a movie, we wrote it on the back. Well, the movie, the ultimate gift made a hundred million dollars. And so does this stuff work? Well, we were just in Tulsa talking to 4,000 people just a few weeks back here, here. I mean, really, in the last couple of days, he invited us out to his club, said, if I live a million years, I'll never be enough to not thank you every day of my life for saying, even though I was blind, you can read what I wrote and you can see it as a movie before I could. And he said, there's a result now. I write books, I can't read and I make movies I can't watch. So there's a question asking worth the answer, 100% yes. And yet what Chris will talk about if you want is the seven roadblocks, it's stifle, stop, indeed to all of us. Seven roadblocks, I can just imagine. I know they're in your book and they're laid out. I know that fear is one of them and can you go through some of the others so people might recognize themselves? Right, the big one is unworthiness. I mean, that's the top one because it's just this underlying feeling that so many people live with and it's usually conditioning of some kind from our childhood that leaves us thinking that we're just not enough. So when opportunities are presented to us, we're standing there, there's that perfect person at some meeting or some dinner or some event and it's the person you needed to talk to or somehow you get close and you hold back and you go, I'll do it later or I'm not ready or someone calls you and says, are you ready to do this? We'd like to have you come in and talk to us and all of a sudden that comes up and you don't ask for what you want, you don't ask for what you need because deep down you haven't gotten in touch with that unworthiness and it's controlling your life. And there's naivete. I mean, that's a big one. I tell the story in the book about Imelda and the mangoes and when my daughters were very young, they were born 16 months apart with this beautiful Filipino woman who was coming every day and helping with the children and she would make these great dishes from her homeland and she cuts up a fruit one day, puts it on a plate and says, Crystal, try this. And I bit into this juicy orange fruit and I'm like, Imelda, what is this? And she goes, it's a mango. And I go, a mango. How come I never tried a mango? I've been all over Europe. I felt like I was such a worldly person. I thought, how did I miss the mangoes? And I go, where did you get it? I'm thinking she must have imported it from the Philippines and she goes at the grocery store. Kind of like seriously, I've been passing these at the grocery store, the best fruit in the world, but it made me think about it. I'm naive. I'm a girl who grew up from Idaho. We had lots of potatoes, no mangoes. So I'm not looking for mangoes, but what else am I passing by every day? What person that could be like my next best friend, best advocate, somebody that I need to help or my next opportunity? I mean, so many of us just walk past or look past some of the things that we should be inquiring about, we should be asking about, we should be wondering about.  We're not afraid to ask, well, we wanna know everything. We're wildly curious. We wanna know when, where, why, how, right? And we're not afraid to ask them more. We're not afraid pretty much to ask for anything, right? But then suddenly, depending on how we were parented, what happened in our school years, stop talking, I'm tired of hearing you, stop asking me so many questions. Sit down, don't ask any questions unless you're called on, unless I call on you. Just basic rejection at work. Your opinions aren't valued. You stop contributing, you stop asking. Suddenly we all get shut down because that beautiful inborn ability to ask gets crushed out of us. And so we find ourselves standing there as an adult, pretty much terrified to ask anyone for anything and ashamed that we don't have all the answers. And it's sad because this is a journey. This life is a journey. We'll never have all the answers. We need to be able to open up to asking ourselves and asking others because we need to be a part of each other's journey. It's an important part of achieving anyone's destiny. Indeed. I wanna say I just discovered dragon fruit so don't feel so bad. I never had it before and it was sitting right in my grocery store and now I'm in love, right? It's divine. But forgive me, of course we work from home now. I'm really intrigued and I wanna say something and thank you for that story. Really pretty powerful of a story, what is possible when somebody has an idea and inspiration and thankfully this woman was sitting next to him to encourage him to go forward and to make sure he knew, no, you're not alone. I'm right here. Asking I think is huge and I don't know where I came upon the ability. I know I didn't always have it but I know sometime in my adult had something shifted and I got a lot of chutzpah. I got a lot of like, really missed chutzpah, yeah. The Yiddish word of, you know, well, Cajones. I live in New York and I know what hootspah is, I got it. And it sometimes amazes me. So I'm gonna give an example. It amazes me when people don't. So as with most of us who are entrepreneurs I will have occasionally a call with somebody who's very interested in my services. Now most people it works out it moves forward but every so often I'll get somebody and the big deterrent money, right? Oh, I can't do that. I don't have the money. And before I know it, they're getting off the phone. And I have often sat there and thought that is really fascinating that you are not standing for yourself because it costs them nothing to ask me a question. And I have options. I could give them at least off the top and I had five options that probably would work for them even if they worked with me once every four to six weeks, right? Or they did my online program or, you know, facilitator there's a million ways that they could come in and still be assisted. And I'm amazed they're getting off the phone, the Zoom they're done, they've already canceled themselves out. And so I loved when I got this book and I love the premise of this book and the heart of this book. And so I wanna go deeper into this asking and like what really is possible for people who aren't even considering doing these things how bold can people get around asking? I think each of us is intrinsically once you wake up to your self-awareness you're unlimited because you're made in the image and lightness of God therefore you've got God drops and it's like a drop of water in the ocean the ocean's still the ocean God's still God. You and I have that infinite ability. And so let me just do my story, okay? So 1974 I've been graduate school with Ike I think one of the smartest, wisest men ever Buckminster Fuller Einstein's best guy 15 doctors to Harvard, thousands of inventions like geodesic domes, dimaxing cars and I'm trying to be bucky and make the mistake of doing his stuff and I built the Wall Street Record Club botanical gardens, aviaries, homes. What I didn't get because you can't be a good anybody else is that I was building at the wrong time out of plastic PVC, polyvinyl chloride and I crashed and burned so fast that's why I learned how to ask the wrong question which is what the people are doing, right? And that, Debbie, give me all the options. Debbie, I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy back to the unworthy thing is what they're really saying is intrinsically they don't feel they're self-worthiness and that's where I was in 1974 and I check a book in the library how to go bankrupt by yourself. My best works experience so for six months and I was reading The New York Times all the worst news fit to print I'm sleeping in a sleeping bag in front of another guy's room for six months and I keep saying, okay, God, what is it you want me to do? Otherwise I'll slash my wrist because I don't get it because I thought my self-worth and net worth were the same. Those are not the same because we've got people out there hanging out by their fingernails and they're going, yeah, it's easy for you, you're vastly successful but I, you know, wasn't and so I said, what am I supposed to do? And he said, no, what do you want to do, Mark? And I said, I want to speak to people that care about things that matter that make a life transformative difference. Well, that was miracle number one. Miracle number two, I go down to my roommates I'm living in Hicksville, Long Island, New York and I go, hey guys, you know anyone young speaking that's not a Broadway star, a celebrity, a lawyer or a doctor or a famous person. I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's my ticket. There's a kid out in Hopog a few years older than you but he is dying. Oh, Mike. I go second miracle. I go out to Hopog with his ticket, listen to the guy Chip Collins and mesmerize 500 people go up to him at the end and I asked him, I say, Chip, teach me how to do what you're doing. He said, look, good chance you're making is one in a thousand you're gonna make it. So go do some real work. I said, no, this is what I want to do. Well, he told me what to do. I started doing it. And then the fourth miracle is people in the audience said, wow, that is a great story. I got to take it to my wife or I got to share my business. We have it in the book. So I quick did a book called Stand Up Speak Out and Win into little itty bitty audiences. That's what everyone's got to hear. You start small as an acorn and you become an oak tree, right? I did this book and I sold 20,000 copies to six people, 10 people, 12 people, a little insurance offices in a year but that at $10 each, 20,000 times $10, $200,000. Again, I'm rising. I buy a brand new Chrysler Corgioglu if you come into another. I thought I had arrived for a second time but that started with is now 318 books, a half billion sold. And my goal is to sell a billion which if you ask anybody, that's impossible. Which is okay, but I have to be 127 options for renewal. I got a high quality life, great, explosive, what a beautiful, wonderful, wise wife that we're gonna live that long. So it's okay. So first of all, Hicksville, I just wanna say I grew up in North Belmore, Long Island. So yes, so we grew up rather close to each other in New York. And what I really appreciate about what you just said, Mark, is in your ask.  But I think what's really important is you didn't supply the details. You didn't say this is exactly what I'm gonna talk about and this is exactly who's gonna attend. You had the energy of it. And I think that takes the onus off of the ask. And so I appreciate that you're sharing your story because for people out there listening, you can too have a design-ish of what it might look like. Is that correct? Not only is it correct, I'd like you to let Crystal tell a very similar story because every one of us starts, general, my teacher buttons floors, they go from macro to micro, big to little, deductive to inductive. And most of us say, well, if I don't do every step, then maybe I can't do it. Well, no one knows every step. You can't. Yeah, exactly. And so you just do the next right thing and then more will be revealed. Crystal, when you tell your story, I'm so grateful we're coming to you next because that was my direction. Mark and I, Hicksville, North Belmore on the same page here. And I wanna just say, because you talk a lot about fitness and being spiritually, emotionally, physically fit, being healthy and added to your story, will you also include, was there an awakening with your body that allowed that wisdom to come through you in order to disseminate that to those who need to hear it? Yes, I will. And that comes a little bit later, Debbie, but so I was one of those kids that found high school to be really easy and boring. And so I accelerated my curriculum, graduated at age 16 and married my boyfriend who was five years older. Not a great life plan as it turns out. Two and a half years later, I'm in a new city, no family, no friends, divorced, baby on my head and honestly no idea of how I was going to support myself. It was really scary, it was a scary time. So I applied for food stamps because I'd heard about that and what should I do? And the day the first day I was standing there, the food stamps arrived, I'd go to the grocery store and standing there getting ready to turn those over for my food and diapers. And I suddenly had this epiphany that I will never forget because it felt to me like a light suddenly was shining on my head revealing something to me. But this question dropped into my mind, like how did I get here? Followed by a second question that was very revealing and it said to me, I heard this in my brain, are you doing the best you can or are you taking the easy way out? And the second I asked myself that question, I knew the answer. I knew that I wasn't doing the best I could and honestly I didn't even know what that was. I really did not know what that was, but I knew there was something more inside of me. I knew there had to be something more. So I went back to my apartment where I was getting eviction notices every single month and I just started asking questions because I didn't have any answers but I knew I had questions suddenly. So I was asking myself, who would hire me? What skills do I have? How can I make money tomorrow? And as I'm asking that question, I remember hearing on the radio like Kelly Girls, Kelly Services, sign up for temporary work, you can get work tomorrow. So I call them, I apply, I fill out the paperwork, they start sending me jobs. Then I apply for, I fill out paperwork for two more temporary agencies. So they're all sending me jobs. And I'm working every day, some assignments in the last four days, some four weeks, I'm filling in an attorney's offices, selling at conventions, setting up booze and walls, doing all these different things. And I began to learn a lot about myself. I really learned that I love small business. I was fascinated with small business owners that they could just start a business and go for it. I love that and I was so intrigued and then I also love sales. So I decided to put myself through real estate school. So in the meantime, someone approached me and asked me if I did any modeling and told me I should do it. So I thought, what do I have to lose at this point? So I went into the biggest agency in my valley, the talent agency, and asked them if they would sign me as a talent. After stumbling through some lines that I had to read and down the runway, acting like I knew what I was doing, fortunately they signed me. And so about a year and a half, little more than a year and a half from that moment that I turned over those food stamps to the cashier, I'm now a licensed realtor working for the biggest home builder in my valley. I became the number one realtor and I happened to do some television commercials that went national. So at that point, when you get enough residual income, they make you join Screen After School, which allowed me to get the best insurance benefits available for myself and my little boy.  And I often look back on that moment because I knew it would have been just as easy for me to like slide into my victimization and just keep going the wrong direction. But I'm so thankful for the question. That question changed everything for me. Are you doing the best you can? Are you taking the easy way out? It was like my moment of truth. I knew there was more. And so I think part of that is being able to answer yourself with a lot of courage and honesty. I think that's really important when those moments come to us, are we gonna face it with courage? Are we gonna answer our own questions with courage and really sort of parent ourselves in a way? You parlayed this into health and fitness down the road. Right, so my mom was really ahead of her time. Yeah, so I got into real estate, sold a lot of real estate, started investing in my own stuff. And then I became fascinated because I would be selling a house to someone and they would start talking to me about a hundred issues and problems. Before you know it, I'd be writing a plan. I would tell them what to do and they'd say, can you write that down for me? I don't know how to say those words to my husband or I don't know. So I thought I've got to do something about this. I thought I'd go back into psychology. I took some classes and I'm like, this isn't it. So one of the guys building my cabinets, sort of a long story, but he came in one day and he was so fit and slim. And I said, Tony, what happened to you? The last time I saw you, you were a lot bigger. And he said, I stopped smoking and I got hypnotized. And I said, wait, that doesn't work that way. You're supposed to gain weight. He said, I know, it's miraculous. The guy gave me an audio, listen to it for 30 days. I can go sit in a bar with my friends. They're smoking, I don't crave food. I don't crave cigarettes. And I'm like, I was hooked, daddy. I researched the best holistic school and signed up and I ended up taking, immersing myself in all of the certification courses for life coaching, for clinical hypnotherapy, started doing the clinical. I started having so many breakthroughs and part of what I was coaching people on was health and fitness. Because I had been fortunate enough to grow up with a mother who was very much into big organic gardening, we drew all this kind of stuff that was, before it was chic, she was having us do juice cleanses and eat all organic vegetables from the garden. But there was a point in my life where I realized that I wasn't just loving myself the way I knew I needed to. I remember racing back one day after I ate like a caramel muffin, and going back to my scales, like, I'm like, I can't even wait. It was sort of this obsession with being perfect and making sure that I was this particular way all the time.  I was like, what are you doing? Why are you doing this? You know what it takes to have health and fitness. You know what to do. You know what your body loves and what doesn't love your body. So why don't you just start trusting that? And from those questions, I started forming that program called Skinny Life, the secret to physical, emotional, spiritual fitness because I had seen it in my clients. It's so much more about learning to love yourself and then make it your business to understand what are those things that the foods that love me got? I say in my Skinny Life program, I want you to love food more than ever. I just want you to love the food that loves you back and make it your business to know what that is.  It's more of a merry-go-round, the weight loss merry-go-round where they lose weight and come back again and gain it all back. And I thought, this is crazy. This does not have to happen. I call it being an accordion, right?  And I fully understand good on you. I love that we have a hypnotherapist in the house because she's gonna hypnotize you to ask questions, ask more questions. That's right. And what happened that led you both to focusing on cleaning up the planet and renewable and natural energy? Because I know you both run two companies. Can you talk about that? When I was in grad school, Bucky Fleur said, look, we got to make the world work for 100% of humanity and oversimplified energy creates water, water food, food abundance, and that can make the planet work. Not that we don't have a lot of wackadoos on the planet right now, but we do. And but we could do that. And 4 billion people don't have clean water, don't have energy, don't have food. So all of a sudden I'm doing the chicken soup series and I'm doing a book with the Weiland World's most profitable artist, 87 million a year. And we're doing a book called Chicken Soup in the Ocean, where we're sold. And he said, come down and talk to the biggest group down in Florida. And he said, I've got all my artists there.  And then we painted 10 miles of the Great Wall of China during the Olympics. And we've done great things together. We dive around the world. So he is a very, very close friend of ours. So why I said, you've got to come. And I meet this guy, John Petrie, he's a top surrealist artist in the world. If you go to John Petrie, artwork could be blown away. But Petrie said, hey, I understand you're really into alternative energy. I'm really an extraordinary inventor. Look at these videos. I looked at the videos and he's got everything to sell. We got pop-up windmills that go 350 degrees for urban wind called a wind charger. We put the most money in the company. We own the company, naturalpowerconcepts.com. Anyone watching might go and watch our videos. They'll be blown away. We got the way to create more than enough water for everybody because right now, California, as we talk is on fire because there's lack of water. That's what no one's saying. And it's neat that we got the solution, but getting out of inertia is a tough thing for big business because they're saying, well, this is the way we've always done it. No, no, that's why you got to ask more questions of what we're changing. So we have this great company. We've got people making all of our stuff now and it's taken 12 years from zero to hero. That's beautiful. And they can find this on your website? Yeah, yep, yep, yep. Okay. And we love it.  Everyone can evolve right now. And today we have the technology that can make everyone 100% successful for the first time in history. And diving, you mentioned scuba diving? Yeah, yeah, I'm pretty good at it. I'm a recovery team diver since I was 16 years old and I'm 73, so that's pretty long time. Wow, favorite place that's far in the world? Two, actually, Jacque Castot liked, we've got friends that lived down in East Lema Eris off of Cancun and did you haven't been diving? Have you been to Cancun? No, I've been to Cancun. I've never dove there. Okay, well, right off the shores, East Lema Eris, which is a place that Jacque Castot himself lived because it was the best diving in the world and that's part of the top of the barrier we, from Belize up to Cancun. So it's, you need to, you are a diver, I'm sure, right? You know, my partner is, he loves, yeah, it's one of his favorite things to do, so I'm sure that's around the corner for me. Yeah, right. Okay, and so Crystal, you are as well? I don't dive, I love snorkeling. I learned to dive eventually, I just haven't done it. I'm a little claustrophobic, so going down that far, but I love snorkeling.  I mean, so many beautiful places to snorkel in the world. I find that I'm very content snorkeling. That's beautiful, I've done as well. Yeah, it's great. I mean, it's a whole another world when you stick your being into that water. It is, it's so wonderful. And what about, you know, one of your books I found interesting was The Miracle of Tiving. And I know that's not really the subject is your, but there's an ask in there, right? In the sense that there is a non-profit or there's a company or a person or a situation that does have a really big ask attached to it, whether they're speaking up or not. And by giving, gifting the miracle of tithing, something beautiful happens. Can you talk about why is tithing such an amazing principle? Absolutely. Well, first of all, the three things, if, you know, we're made it in the creator's image, Genesis 128, then, you know, you're supposed to do three things, create, which is what we've been doing on this seminar or Zoomcast, number two, you're supposed to contribute and then number three, you're supposed to be charitable. And the reason I think I sell more books than anybody is because we tie then every book that we're doing. Now, tithing has four basic Ts and a fifth bonus T. First of all, I got tied their thinking, which is what every major charity, every major philanthropy, they go after just your money, this number four of the treasures. If they went after your mind to come up with new ideas to raise money, people would come up with wonderful ideas on just give you an example in a second.  And then when you are able to give because you've come out of shortage and gotten into surplus, which will happen if you become a giver, then you got to have a thankful heart that you could do all that. And the best example I can give is that Liddy Dole came to me and she was head of the American Red Cross or out of blood and she said, hey, look, people die because we don't have pseudo blood. And you get the best ideas, Mark. I've ever heard, can you come up with an idea on how to get enough blood? I said, yeah, well, let's go to medical doctors. I see blood and guts every day. I said, no, no, no, I tried. That's our 570,000 they won't give. They won't score for us. So come up with a new idea. I said, well, look, I work four marketplaces. One of which is the chiropractors. There are 77,000. I see 25 million patients a month. I've taught them how to build big practices. Let me call them and write them and text them and we did.  We got a year and a half worth of cryogenically frozen blood because we got people to give. And we did our little book, Chicken Soup for the, third helping the chicken soup for the soul. And it went wild for the next 58 weeks, but we got the blood. Nobody dies because of lack of blood in America now because I created enough blood and everybody that's out there ought to give blood if they can, if they're healthy and happy and a lot of good things happen. Number one, though, that everybody needs to know because you're asking her about health. When you give blood, you get new blood and new blood makes you feel younger.  Interesting, okay. And for people, powerful story, I give blood myself. I think it's a terrific idea. I know people give bone marrow. I mean, there's a lot of ways to give. For people who are sitting on the desire, right? They're saying, you know, I really, really do want to give, but I'm not quite sure where to give. Some of my books, for instance, I did a dog anthology.  It was wonderful. And that was abundantly clear. Oh, I wanna give to an animal organization that absolutely helps and rescues and gives a thriving life to dogs in particular. So that felt like a beautiful channel. But for somebody who doesn't see the alignment, how do they know, where can they start about where to give? Like where it really feels good for them to give. Right. Well, I think you should start where, just what you said, Debbie, like what are the things that call to your heart? You know, is it children? We happen to be, you know, just we love our children. We're advocates of children. Children need help. They need advocates. They can't advocate for themselves. So one of our big charities is childhelp.org. They've gotten like help 10 million abused children.  And then once you kind of understand the things or figure out the things by asking yourself, what really calls to my heart? If I could make a difference, then investigate the organizations because some are better than others. You can go to charity navigator and you can actually see financials. You know, you want to give to a charity where most of the money, very little is going to admin. You know, I would say no more than 15%. So 85% should go to the programs. That's an important one to check out. And the example there is that we're, we won the racial juror award, which means we came from rags to riches and then excessively philanthropic. In this year, we got 25,000 at risk kids going to college because of us and our peers. 10 of us went in in the Supreme Court a year. You get a gold medal. You can go look up per ratio of your association. You can see our scholars and you can see the recipients. You know all the recipients, but we spend a week together basically a year, a few days less than that. And every one of the recipients contributes something, whether the rich accountant gives the hotel room and that and then we went into the Supreme Court. But all the money we raise goes directly to the scholarships to the kids. And then each one of us is a mentor to a mentee to, and I can just give you a story after story, but just in a sentence, this kid comes out of Vietnam that his family's had nothing but trouble, long story, very short, creates a company by asking, coming to our seminars learns how to ask. And now, you know, right after he graduates, head of his class at USC, he becomes by asking us how to do it. He created a $5 million a year of gross business called Instrumental Savings, Nathan Wynne, who's our great beyond great friend. I mean, you watch these kids grow and bloom and, you know, he had no father for a while and all that. And it just, it's so nice that we're able to do that, but everybody to have a full life, you've got to contribute to somebody else because we're all here to source and serve somebody that can't do it for themselves without your help. So I hear you saying ask, but also follow the ask. So when you can give, you also give to the ask. Right, and then make sure that you follow up, make sure where your money, your heart, your thinking goes, gets the result. And I can tell you that Horatio kids are some of the more extraordinary human beings. And as a result, we started Horatio Canada and now we're doing it in other parts of the world. But it started by my old minister in New York, Norman Vincent Peele. So, but that was 70 years ago. So it's amazing what's happened because he asked those who are making it to succeed. I never, and you never know if you're gonna win.  I won because you're nominated. No one tells you, hey, you are nominated to be in the ratio. It's a surprise. Congratulations, that's beautiful. Thank you. This is Dare to Dream. What are you next, Dare to Dream? What are your future dreams and goals? And Crystal, I will start with you. You know, I really, we love, we would love to get into filmmaking and starting with the fable of Makayla. So we've had, you know, some conversations with some people from Hollywood, some really great folks. So a couple of producers out there. This other book that, I don't know if we can really talk about it yet, this one that we're writing for, he's actually a pastor, a very famous black pastor who is now passed on to the other side, but his family asked us to write his book. And it's called Wishes to, From Wishes to Riches, the illuminations of Reverend Dyke. So it's such a beautiful story and such an amazing story. This man's life and his journey that we feel so strongly like that needs to be made into a movie. And we feel like we've touched, we've been able to touch so many lives through books. And we also love the medium of film. And we just want to keep going with that. Great, I see it for you. And Mark, what are you next here to dream? I'll just agree with everything she just said. Oh, they say that, you know, at a macro level, if I can help make the world work for a hundred percent of humanity with my thinking, my ideas, my books, my videos, my movies, documentaries, that's what's gonna happen. And we're owning it. So it's got to come to pass because that's what you and I teach and it works. Well, again, their website, markfichterhanson.com, it's H-A-N-S-E-N.com, as well as crystalvisionlife.com. What would you like to say to hear? What would you like to say here to the people, to the listeners, to the viewers about asking? What would you like to inspire them to do? Right, I just want to remind everyone that there is no mechanism that has the ability to reveal what is hidden from you, like asking. So we just want to invite everybody to take that asking journey with us because when you become a master asker in your own life, everything changes for the better, I promise you. And we want to invite everybody to a free event that we're having. It's if you go to askthebookclub.com, we're gonna be holding a free book club discussion class on the book. So once you get your book, it's on in every form, of course, Audible, Kindle, it's at all the bookstores and of course on Amazon. But join us for that class because it's gonna be really dynamic. We're super excited about that. Askthebookclub.com. And Mark, what would you like to say to folks here at the end? Just that I have a thankful heart that everyone's gonna learn how to be in a master asker and they're gonna fulfill their life at every one of the multiple dimensions because I think most people only half asked back to what you were really saying at the very beginning of the show is that most people aren't willing to do their potential. They say, oh, no, no, no, I can't afford that. And what they're doing is they're shutting down their own good because I couldn't, there's no way I could be the world's best-selling author because from first grade to sixth grade, I was in remedial reading because my parents were David Schimmigrant. So we didn't have books we're on the house. So to think that I could do that is outside the realm of possibility, but if you top break the lid off by learning how to ASK to GET what you want and back to what you were saying, one of the authors in our book who you know, Rita Davenport says, you gotta get your ask in here. All right, on. That's beautiful. Get your ask in here and become, and I love the other from Crystal, a master asker. That is profound. If you guys remember anything, do that, play around with this concept and let us know what happens for you and from you. Thank you both so much for coming in the show today. Thank you, Dabby. We have had so much fun with you. You are wonderful. Thanks for all you do. Yeah, I appreciate you both so much and what a great message. I end with this quote from Mark and from Crystal. Everything we learn with emotion creates a much stronger memory in our minds and our bodies. It's the quantity of service plus the quality with a positive mental attitude that equals where you're feeling good about yourself and equals unlimited compensation. Join me next week on this number one transformation conversation. Scarlett Raven is back for the third time, a listener fan favorite. She's an intuitive guide and a powerful entrepreneur and she has a new book out and new information about StarSea Channel and she'll be sharing wisdom and healing suggestions. If you love the podcast and you want to see me and the amazing guests, go to youtube.com slash Dabby Daschinger, D-E-B-B-I-D-A-C-H-I-N-G-E-R and watch the show. And thank you for joining us on Dare to Dream. Remember, don't just dare to dream. Remember to turn all your dreams, ask, so you can turn them into your reality.