Welcome back to the 21 convention of Orlando, Florida 10 year anniversary special event. Our next speaker has been a long time coming This event for a few different reasons Personal professional all kinds of interesting things. He's also the first black speaker. We've ever had at the event He's also the best-selling author of mode one which you can get on Amazon calm And he's also known as the godfather of verbally direct game without further ado Please help me welcome Alan Roger Curry to the stage So See when you get familiar with me I Would loosely and I mean very loosely compare myself to the speaker Joe Navarro Who reads people Not constantly Read people Primarily women but men as well the reason why a lot of you all are here is because you want to be inspired You're looking for that breakthrough moment that breakthrough moment confidence breakthrough a backbone breakthrough Motivation breakthrough first. I want to give credit to Anthony. I thank him most sincerely for inviting me here and Extra special thanks to Rolo Tomasi For referring me and recommending me Now Rolo He challenges me because when I read any of his books I have to have a thesaurus right next to the book Because he's deep and I respect him immensely But when I was talking about breakthrough Anthony mentioned. I'm the first black speaker. I Didn't think that could happen in 2017, but I'm on it My last full-time job 95 job before I became a dating coach full-time Was working at a university When young brothers from the inner city and a lot of them were the first in their family to ever attend college I had this one young brother. He loved to skip class wasn't doing this homework. So I had him come to my office. I Was talking to him And as I do as I just looked at you guys I just Looked at him. I said, what's going on? He came out with a whole bunch of excuses one of them the proverbial Well, mr. Currie your older black man, you know The white man is trying to keep us down I said is there any white male singer that you love? He said Justin Timberlake. I love Justin Timberlake. I Said so When you were trying to get out of bed the other morning Justin Timberlake was keeping you in the bed He laughed like you guys When you're supposed to be at that 830 class Justin Timberlake was outside of your house going. No, you can't go to class.  I said you become accountable for your life Become accountable right now write this moment And he got real serious Because he had this look like I thought you were gonna be on my side.  I'm gonna challenge you To become a man right now I Said here's what I want you to do. I want you to get a journal.  I said say it again. He said vindication Now fast forward This young brother was the first one to get a degree in his family He made the dean's list And he saw me He was overwhelmed with emotion when he saw me. He couldn't even get words We exchanged a powerful stare He became a man. So a lot of you guys in here in your own way are Looking for again your breakthrough moment like I'm a big movie buff and I love among other movies I love movies that that show a fictional character having a Breakthrough moment. I'm a site three real quick who in here did not see if you get me in Did not see it. Okay. I apologize. I'm gonna give you a spoiler for it Tom Cruise plays an attorney Lieutenant Daniel Caffee and his thing is He's the master of the plea deal Nobody Provokes plea deals better than Daniel Caffee But he avoids litigation like it's the plague So Two guys get accused of murder and he tries to get a plea deal for But the two soldiers who were charged with murder, they don't want a plea deal You see, I'm sure there's me and in here who have served in armed services I never have but I've had relatives of that It's different in civilian life And they point that out in the movie See in the armed services when you give an order That order is always followed Always Matter of fact, there's a scene when Jack Nicholson's character Nathan Jessup says tells the soldier. I want you to contact Castro and tell him we're surrendering Cuba and so she says yes, sir Did he say how are you joking? He said yes, sir. So here was the interesting thing Jack Nicholson's character Tom Cruise feels like Jack Nicholson's character gave an order for what's known as a cold red a form of hazing To get the soldier in line Why is it challenging in Lieutenant Daniel Caffee situation? because Unlike again civilian life if I tell somebody in this room, hey go shoot Jojo and they go shoot them I'm not going to jail. I'm not going to prison because it could easily sit down. Are you talking crazy? But again and armed services when you give an order That order is to always be followed So Jack Nicholson's character had told someone One of his subordinates to order the cold red so Tom Cruise had To find a way to get Colonel Jessup Jack Nicholson's character to confess that And I really related to his situation because it was challenged particularly towards the end and this is what I give the spoiler Jimmy Moore puts him in the toughest position She she basically says I want you to achieve this objective.  It's there's a lot of great scenes in this movie But what I call his breakthrough Is he calls Colonel Jessup to the stand and he starts asking them all these questions That is somewhat related But the judge doesn't feel like his questions are going anywhere So he says lieutenant Kathy, do you have any more questions for this witness and he just stands because he's thinking about that predicament And he looks at his colleague His colleague gives him a subtle shake of the head like looks at Demi Moore. She kind of hasn't looked like Jessup says Do you have any more questions for me Danny? I mean clothing and foot lockers Surely this is not what you brought me on this stand answer Do you have any more questions for me?   I mean you guys are laughing. Let me take a swig George McFly in the movie back to the future.   Do I deserve to be here? Everybody just browbeat me bullying me around But George McFly man.  Was William Wallace? Who can forget that proffer ending of brave heart?  I'll send you your beta male card in the mail and you can you know put it on the wall So I'm a proud beta.  I just let them punk me as it relates to what I do Which is a These are four of my audio books That's my updated. I have an updated version of my most well-known book mode one dating coach, I know a lot of people here are married or In relationships, but that's my primary demographic and I'm also BDSM polyamory consultant Yeah, it's like that Now let me go back This book who said again, it's all about verbal seduction See might be wondering well Alan was talking about these breakthrough moments. How does that relate to him being a dating coach? Some of the guys here, it's not too a lot of guys here were totally unfamiliar with me. I was just joking with Rollo Lot of guys came up to me. They said hey, how about your curry? I said, hey, you know my bus. No, we heard you interview Rollo Tomasi on your blog talk radio show Okay Yeah, matter of fact, it's funny. I stopped doing my show in June 2016 and every now and then I'll go and check the numbers to see how many listens of episodes That I still receive. I know people listen to my archives Whose head and shoulders? Number one in listening since I ended my show That guy right there Rollo Tomasi But who said again in Part two I have six what I call verbal seduction stories The first one is the biggest one. I will call this my breakthrough moment 20 I had two close friends that set up a double date and The day before the double date One of the women's younger cousins came in town unexpectedly So she wanted to hang with the girl. So initially the one woman said we're gonna have to cancel because my younger cousin And my friend said well, how is your young cousin thing? He might be a little girl. She's I don't know. She's 19 So we define somebody For her and to keep her company We'll make it a triple date. So my close friend calls me.    So the first hour this date Every little subtle advance I try to make to this woman.  What are you doing? What do you think I am a slut or I know two bits like I don't know What are you doing?  I'm just here.  It'll sit again But I get up and just walk out. I walk out the apartment building. I'm just walking. I'm mumbling under my breath. I mean she just Took my backbone in that room and just got an ax and just start slicing it Just destroying it just emasculate me on the spot. Something else to me. She's behind me She comes out and it turns out she followed me and she starts taunting me. Oh What the matter You pal Poor baby Mentioned George McFly in the book a laugh, but in the book. I call this I literally do I call this my George McFly moment And it's the reason I'm standing on stage right now Now to this point my mother'd always conditioned me to be the nice guy be polite never say anything that will rattle a woman Ruffle feathers come across as crass Disrespectful disrespectful rule And I adhere to that Social programming or two words.  Because they want to know are you really alpha? Or did you read some PUA book and you're trying to pretend that you're alpha?   I Said now who drove here you or your cousin she said I Did I said where's your car? She said over there.    That's where it started and also a phrase I use obviously by the title When she said that I must have said about ten times. I said say it again.   She says yes, sir My two buddies are like making out.    He pulls me. He said do do do Did you get a truck outside? Here's the most interesting question. He said did you take some classes and hypnotism and you In matter of fact, I was in the screen right now wrote a script called hypnotized, but that's another story for another day Listen, no, this is dude.   I said, yeah, man Unleashed my erotic dominance Now my backbone is made of steel And from that point on I was never the same Alan Roger Curry So when I hear young man and particularly young brothers talking about man, I can't deal with these sisters They got all this attitude man.   Oh, yeah, so where'd you go to school?  I've been a coach.  Why you need to be verbally directive? If she said that guys don't need to be Just look back at the audience like I'll be vindicated before I get off this stage. I knew it was coming I knew it was coming Sure enough She talks she talks and she starts raving about this male platonic friend of hers. Let's call him Chuck She's like oh Chuck is the greatest friend in the world. God. Are you like he does my laundry for me? If I need somebody to you know lift heavy boxes.   I love by the director I love Michael man. It's called heat with Al Pacino Robert De Niro There's a brief scene in there with Al Pacino. This is one of his confidential informants And he thought this confidential informant was gonna have some valuable information and he didn't he just says a simple line But I used to play it all the time with my blog talk radio show.    They love to be entertained. They love that empathetic listening ear I had a guy who I'm known from high school days. He's here in Orlando. We went out to dinner And he was admitting to me. He said Alan even though I know this is the book that gets the most juice He said this book helped me and this is when I attracted a lot of what I would call the red peel crowd Was this book and this book? But he said man, how was every woman's just good friend And he said you talked about the empathetic listening ear guy that archetype He never want to be this guy the guy who you get that car.  I mean I Would never do none of that stuff See that's why I love you friend. You're such a good friend.   Remember what I said about demise.  Let me get moving with these these multiple slides.  I Help me and there's various Manifestations of masculinity and manhood. I concentrated via verbal communication as a man How do you choose to verbally communicate to women which type of relationship you really want with them? Directly indirectly We're not at all Most men and women are not honest with each other regarding what type of relationship. They really want that's what we have What's known as manipulative head games? If every man who wanted a strictly sexual relationship was the on she tell a woman that that's what he wanted And they if that's what she wanted she was to say that's what I want to there would be no such thing as head games If every woman who wanted a purely platonic friendship was to tell every man that straightforwardly and if that's what the man wanted He would reciprocate. There would be no such thing as head games, but that's not the reality of life example of a man You really want either strictly sexual relationship with a woman or you want to spend time with a woman both sexually and non-sexually But you temporarily or indefinitely pretend as though you are content With a purely platonic friendship with her. I call that fun clubbing That's the term I made very popular among my fans and followers fun clubbing. That's essentially when you again, you're Pretending to be content indefinitely With just a friendship with a woman, but you know deep down you would either rather be her next long-term boyfriend Or one of her casual sex lovers, but you don't have the balls to say that You really want a strictly sexual relationship with a woman, but you temporarily Pretend as though you are interested in a relationship that is long-term emotionally profound and strictly monogamous Not to disparage all PUA's but that's what a lot of PUA types taught.  You're rocking the boat man.       See that's when that little devil emerges. This is shoot.  So no, no, no, no, no.  I don't know what your mommy and daddy told you You're a good girl wholesome for them as they give you at least token resistance Righty hypocrites Are gonna be similar to that woman on that triple date.  I don't sleep with guys. I just me. What do you think? It's wrong with you I'm a respectable woman with a six-figure salary.  They don't get theatrical I said I'm married. I'm engaged. I got a boyfriend.  She ain't walked away Manipulative time wasters already alluded to them That relates to my book the pot matter of fact my book who said again emphasizes these two two archetypes I'm gonna book the possibility of sex talks about these these are the women that want you to think You got at least a chance of getting in their pants and lie you guys Fall for it and say oh man. She's just a challenge She's playing hard to get No, she's not she's never these women in this category and never ever ever giving you the pussy ever They just want at minimum you to invest time flattering them entertaining them or providing them with it an empathetic listening ear at maximum if you got means They want to get as many financial favors from you as possible until they get bored with you and dismiss you Now it's funny. I've even had some other dating coaches give me blowback on this on my first three architects Like I'm gonna call one out by name. She's from London. He's your noble. I was interviewing her my blog talk radio show When I talked about reciprocated shoes like yeah Rejected she was of course like yeah, I talked about these. She's like yeah Yeah to this she's like no how in they disagree She tried to say the manipulative time wasters were the same as these I said no Women don't like to acknowledge that there's manipulative time wasters Why? That too Yeah, all ballot. I was out in the nightlife just last night.  Do you think that these women were going to these clubs looking for dick? Do you really?  You know women kind of raised me as a nice guy. I said oh really So I asked the whole auditorium I said how many you guys in here think you're classy gentleman and well-mannered and polite nice guys and like pride 95% of guys Raise the hand and I asked them one simple question that you afterwards you could hear a mouse fart. I Said how's that working out for you?     I actually that's one more wide Divide them up to at least three categories One is a mode three timid that would be a guy who just goes to the party like price them guys last night They go to party to get all dressed up and they went to two buddies Then again to the club and what they do they just stand against the wall Okay guys you ready go. Yeah Mode three target he plays right into the gold diggers. That's the guy He got enough confidence to start a conversation with a woman But 95 to 99% of conversations. Hey, it's an Angela. Yeah, you know, I'm on the house on the beach Drive a Porsche 911 This is a real Rolex watch. I went to Harvard He's hoping that all this impressive stuff. He says one's gonna be like, oh my god I need to just open my legs for you right now. You're so impressive Then after he says all the impressive stuff and he doesn't get laid.   They're bitches man.    How would you expose her facade? Let's say together That's the answer to all those questions mode one You approach women with a high degree of self assurance You open a conversation with them with a high degree of self-confidence You let a woman know that you find a physically attractive sexual appealing. That's not obligatory But I always suggest that and then from there you simply invited to share your company Here's key this relates back to I don't believe in the mislead women if particularly as relates to casual sex If your interest is in some form of short-term and or non-monogamous sex Don't try to hide that deny that or bullshit women about that because in the long run it makes you look weak Makes you look like a weak. No backbone verbal coward.   You try to be mr. Ethical getting laid. I said, oh, really?  Are you perverted? I mean I said what you got some age-related ethics I Said maybe that was extreme.  I said what's wrong? You got some ethics related to drugs Things like touche Then all a shilling group just get her from the table and walked away In bed bottom line.  Don't let it beat up your confidence Just move on to the next one.  Okay There you go. You have to not give much respect. He passed away, of course recently He said the greatest sex organ is not between your legs, but it's between your ears. I don't know how many you guys know But just like a lot of me and watch porn Women read erotica erotica novels like crazy. I Was in a Beverly Hills bookstore And I was looking for this book and all of a sudden I see this one hour These women were just like by eight women into the short little corner So go back Here's a tip I notice have you ever seen a woman start off standing like this and all of a sudden she goes I Was tell some guys last night about this See bright things off. She's just getting tired.  I should give Rolo a shout out in this book. This is kind of my brief version I'm not a historian by any means or sociologists, but I go back to pre-feminism days and Bringing up the current society mainly for my younger male readers Because if you were born as a millennial you might not understand why are things?  I'm like, yes What about the guy who's married to her now thinks she was the good girl?   I'm on Wikipedia. I Patreon LinkedIn all social media. It's been my pleasure. I apologize for going a little longer. Thank you so much 21 convention 2018 of Orlando, Florida.    Are you ready for the challenge of the next day in front of you? the past is the past Extract the morsels of wisdom From those unexpected episodes of adversity use it as fuel for motivation Get re-energized You're on the mission Mission continues That's why you here If you want to kick things up to the next level now last year when I spoke I Challenge some guys to create a breakthrough moment Where they conquered some type of major fear and I've had at least three guys come up to me who were here last year One guy he's not here today. He's one of security. I hope he doesn't mind me calling up by name named Keaton That's funny Keaton. He's a brother And if you study how brothers in the aqua brothers, we're little we're characters Because last year when I approached Keaton, he was just real cool. I Like I don't know you I don't know nothing about you. You don't press me But then after my speech he counts means like oh my god, man That was awesome. And so he came to me this year. He said there were some things I said That caused him to have a breakthrough moment I had another guy.  He's kind of shy mild manner guy And people know about the mode one approach. No, it's about being bold and straightforward And he said he was having a conversation with a young lady And she challenged him.  He said I'm talking to you cuz I Now here's the thing he admitted this to me now externally he was confident.   She did that to him He matched it. He didn't back down basically like yeah, I said it He said they had a sterile and again, he said eternally. He's like, oh my god. He's very cursed me out.   There's a guy Anthony Bourdain. I was actually a fan of his I Wanted to do a Travel dating show. I wanted to be with to dating relationships what he was the basically restaurants and chefs Travel to different cities Find a nuanced differences in the dating culture. So I was a fan of his But he quit the game. I don't want any of you all to quit the game. I want you to compete This journey called life compete Now there's some people they don't quit but they spectate if that's their choice So be it if they hang around me for too long.  They'll say Man this loss was hard to take But I left everything on the floor. I left everything on the floor So when you take your last breath and let's say I don't know If what is it? St. Gabriel meets you at the pearly gates Whoever in the afterlife might interview you will you be able to say I? Left everything on the floor all the challenges that came your way. I left everything on the floor Now here's the thing not only will the challenges of life Essentially try to bully you Unexpected adversity that gain that hater voice try to bully you and I know somebody sitting in this audience right now thinking about I don't know what's called Billy Johnson that guy in the fifth grade. They just bullied you Karma came back on Billy Johnson.  They will bully you too In what way you better act the way I want you to act or you're not getting any of this What you say what you say you better act right or you're not getting none of this And what do they want you to become? That's what I call it. They're obedient puppy dog With some guys that give in today. Yes, Fred.  I love pussy as much as the next guy, but I'm not gonna sacrifice my sense of self-respect.  I'm the man.  So are you So let's get started Last year I mainly talked about my main book mode one I touched on this didn't really touch on these two at all I'm gonna touch more on these three, but to give you the quick recap That's my first book mode one. I did a 2017 updated version My first version mode one came out in April of 1999 First paperback version March of 2006. That's my main emphasis verbal communication skills That's underrated Because you know at this conference you hear a lot of guys talking about the whole alpha and beta and I'll be talking about that later on in this conversation But a lot of guys have this impression that alpha means Super big muscles being six foot five Being super athletic being a seventh degree black belt But here's the truth Starting with my high school days.  They were bitches That is for the guy who said to me. He said Alan.   There's been a couple guys at this very conference They say Alan you study people when you're talking to them. I say I most certainly do I listen to how people can burst their vocal inflections Particularly in conjunction with their eye contact. I Can read through a lot of facades? fear of rejection Fear of rejection a lot of people Well, I can say well a lot of people in general, but let's focus on men A lot of men want that magic peel.  But never be rejected newsflash never gonna happen That's like a baseball player one that hit home runs, but never strike out If you a baseball fan, you know most of the top home run hitters Have the most strikeouts in the league Anybody can tell me Alan. Well, I got rejected other day I've been rejected probably more than anybody sitting in here, but that fear can be profound man To the point where you don't want to approach women at all if you're willing to be honest raise your hand If there's been multiple times where you were scared to approach one because of a profound fear of rejection Okay, that's quite a few This is what most guys do when they have a profound fear of rejection they either avoid approaching a women women at all or They'll engage in what I call these friendly flattering entertaining Non-threatening conversations where they never really lay out any desires interest or intentions on the table Godly the weather is great, isn't it? Lee do you come in this restaurant all the time and see there's some pickup artists that will take advantage of that They'll make you think That if you get a woman to be receptive to Friendly flattering entertaining non-threatening conversation that you have a chance.  Because you engage in in 45 minutes of friendly flattering entertaining Non-threatening conversation here's the thing before I get past this slide fear rejection guys will say I'm scared to approach this woman. I'll say So ultimately you're scared of rejection because you're afraid that You might do something or say something that will prevent you from gaining access To that woman's romantic or strictly sexual companionship. Yes, I guess Okay But if you don't approach it off You will not gain access to her sexual attention and companionship at all Yeah, I guess now that you put it like that so in other words You're scared of not getting something you already don't have They just hit a lot you fellas did it I never thought about it like that Second most profound fear to fear of receiving criticisms insults negative reactions.  Raise your head That's what I thought.   Allen. You're so cocky.       Every time that happens.   Nobody likes to be rejected. I don't like to be rejected Like Michael Jordan. He said I don't like to lose but I'm not scared to lose I don't like being rejected But I'm not afraid of rejection and I'll touch on that In a moment because women know how to capitalize on your fear of rejection Wholesome pretenders now those first two types Are you what I call your straightforward non manipulative type, but then the two three trickier types is wholesome pretenders erotic hypocrites and manipulative time-writers This is a book I touched on briefly last year, but I'm touching on a little bit more this year who say it again Mastering the fine art of verbal seduction and oral sex came out with the e-book and paperback in December 2011 an audiobook version in 2015 Say a lot of guys like to put women into these two can what I call convenient categories She's a good girl But she's a slut She's a good girl, but she's a slut now You can say that was halfway valid if we talking about 1918 1928 1938 But in today's society Matter of fact, oh, I forgot to do my little thing. See if anybody watches my YouTube Where's my main camera?     Here's the reason I called myth and there's a book I promote from time to time by a guy named Daniel Bertner is called what do women want anybody familiar with that book if you're familiar with that book, you know That he criticizes us His own gender as I tend to and I have a lot of haters and critics because of but essentially what he says is that Men there's a lot of things that men Believe about women because they want to believe it about women.     Oh Fives, okay, I said I divide them in the five category. Okay. I'm going too fast What I call who said again a five that is a genuine good girl That's a woman who will only engage in sexual relations with a man who is her husband or at bare minimum her fiance So if you find a five Then you have if you're in search of that, you know proverbial good girl if you find a five you found it It's not so much again that woman is born With this biological impulse to be monogamous but her social programming of Concept I talk about all the time.   Oh really? Is that right?  A two is a woman who really likes to get down behind closed doors But again publicly she's gonna present herself as a four You know again a good girl Or if not present herself as a good girl This is my archetype of the erotic hypocrite erotic hypocrite is similar to wholesome pretender But she in addition to wanting to protect her good girl image She thinks man should whine and dine her for the pussy And one that's just a woman who's openly freaky Social program and I already talked about that Now I talked about social program organized religion Is one of the factions in society. I talk about this in my book the beta male revolution That promotes the idea of monogamy For better or for worse So does media and entertainment So does certain aspects of the public school system And many of your parents your siblings other family members And elders in the community Or your culture The nipple of head games. I talked about a lot at last year. So I don't want to well I'll talk about a relation to here's my next book possibly the sex Now guys in the seduction community PUA community They want to always say Allen. So what's the what's the great benefit of being direct? You're like, you know, I'm an indirect guy The other thing indirect is okay. Like what's what's so wrong with being indirect?    It's a damn man. It's been so long since I spent time with a woman platonically man It's driving me crazy, dude. I can't take it. I need to be around some women platonically It's just not an idea and a makeup But you better believe Women love your company in a non physical Non sexual manner to the point where Going back to this title The possibility of sex How do they sell you on the idea of spending time with them? Hmm. There you go See that's the difference between them and just straight up rejectors Rejectors are women. See a lot of guys look at rejectors as the enemy But those women you should appreciate those women who straightforwardly reject you because they let you know basically You're never getting this pussy. Don't even try Don't waste your time exactly Manipulative time wasted. They always want you to think you that close to getting the pussy Well, if you go with me and my girlfriends to these bowling events for the next five weeks, I don't know anything can happen I don't know Anything can happen I mean like I've been like going to bowling with you for the last eight weeks That nice week might be your lucky wings. They love to use that vague ambiguous language. Like you never know possibly maybe is Four things that manipulative time wasters want from men While avoiding engaging in sex with them To be flattered See Before I wrote this book a lot of guys wrote me feedback saying allen I thought money was the only thing that women use men for You will have women just concentrate on number one to be flattered You will have women That say they went to a party and they didn't get as many compliments as they wanted So guess what they do they're calling one of you guys Hey, Joey, you doing anything? No, I'm just like playing video games like what's up?      They knew that guy was gonna say that But they're like really you think they like that one bikini shot you think oh, man.   You know, she called me. I'm that close to getting that pussy. I'm that close He's that close Some women will use you just to flatter their ego and get an ego boost boost their self-esteem number two women love to be entertained And this is why the media and entertainment industry plays up the women I worked before I became a dating coach. That was the industry.    They're not going But those women are come out in droves man.    Hey billy. How you doing billy? He's like hey, what's up linda? Hey, how you doing? What is billy thinking?   By the way, you're never getting this pussy They'll say hey, if you take me out to dinner Who knows what can happen afterwards Who knows if you help me move these heavy boxes from my old apartment to my new apartment I might be just so thankful that Who knows And a lot of you guys fall for it And this was the worst one, man I think I might even touch on that legend the emotionally empathetic listening ear I would arguably say that's the worst of the four How many already familiar with me talking about that raise your hand if you already familiar with it Only a couple of hands a few hands. So it's a lot guys who not this is the emotionally empathetic listening ear Where the woman calls you over a place on a friday night And again, what do you think? I'm in there. It's friday night. She invited me over to the apartment. I'm in there.  I mean like what's wrong amber?      Don't you think they are, Troy? Yeah, they're dicks, man. They're dicks. They lucky I wasn't here See, Troy, you're so sweet. I just love you so much. You're such a sweetheart Troy, he's taking me. I'm the good guy here I'm gonna get it But guess what happens next Friday, next Saturday? Same thing. Troy! I met this new guy at a library and you're not gonna believe this.    You're such a good boy. You bought me a portion name on one.  These are women that If you're single and unattached they'll ignore you But the moment you get a wife, fiancé or girlfriend All of a sudden they're interested God Frank you look so good in that suit.  Thank you Brenda.   Weren't you? narcissistic personality disorder histrionic personality disorder You can usually see the red flags When they go off on some trivial like I don't know.   There are women who have physically assaulted their husbands living lovers closet messengers and of course Liars cheaters and adulterers Now it's funny My book possibility of sex. I've mentioned this a few times on my youtube videos and other stuff I got a lot of great feedback from that book But a lot of guys not well not a lot, but A good number of guys They said man allen Some respects that book left me depressed man But left me depressed because possibility of sex And the beta male revolution.  You better think again Now again, if you got a five Maybe a four in your camp.     Matter of fact, a lot of guys here have mentioned the Negro Manisphere Yeah It's funny. It shows how narrow-minded I could be I was assuming that 98% of guys who read the Negro Manisphere articles or little brothers like myself But nope, I've had so many non-black guys come up. Yeah, I read your recent article on the Negro Manisphere. I'm like, really? Shout out O'Shea Duke Jackson um As a matter of fact, Rolo was talking about how the manuscripts become so diverse And uh, oh, I forgot to give kudos to Rolo because Rolo is the reason I was invited last year, but I appreciate Now Rolo quick-sighted on Rolo A lot of guys last year I thought they you know knew about me from my books, but here we go I'll ride your car. I'm like, yeah, you're in my place. No, I saw I read I listened to the interview with Rolo and blocked our radio I was every guy was like that, but Rolo we had a great interview of steel a highly listened to interview on blocked our radio, but uh Going back to what I was saying Yeah, women here's how scant is there and this is what I include in the article Women will fuck it have a gown aside And in some cases they'll introduce You to their boyfriend if he wants to have to happen at least a handful of times This is my friend Allen. We know each other from college I mean We're feeling man Because I had to be phony and shake this dude.  Hey, how you doing? Pleasure to meet you But articles will have you believe that men She weigh more than women do dude.  Why do women cheat? Women ask me the question. Why do men cheat?  Why?     I've heard uh, I want to say rollo I was watching a video with rollo mentioned.   Are you offering me long-term monogamy? Are you offering to help me raise children? Are you offering me short-term financial compensation or long-term financial security? Are you offering me materialistic gifts? What are you offering?  I interviewed a woman on my patreon page who said that she said I don't want to got us total alpha or total beta.   They're willing to Just supplicate the women Play up to women Basically do anything that women want them to do and they get what I call that doggy treat reward pussy If this guy doesn't have a high level of career success financial success status, he doesn't get laid period total beta males A lot of them have become in sales. They're just being ignored by women Women don't even want their platonic companionship and it's sad I try to help a lot of guys who come to me that are self-proclaimed total beta males Their self-esteem is low. They feel totally romantically and sexually undesirable But for most of them not all of them most of them there is hope And I feel like I can contribute to a transformation from them. So those are my four books I do email consultations Skype and telephone consultations one-on-one face-to-face coaching sessions That's my site direct approach dating.com. You can find me also on wikipedia. I'm alan roger curry questions So I completely agree about the direct game Especially to people who's not in your social circle Would it still be the same with people who are in your social circle to be that direct?  Because well, here's here's the first clarification Now alan roger curry as you can tell from my speaking presentation I like to use a lot of profanity for better or for worse. I like to use a lot of sexually explicit language for better or for worse You don't have to use profanity or sexually explicit language to be more one Here would be an example.  No, that's where the language. No, but I was mow one Because you letting that woman know that hey, I'm not talking to you because I want to share bowling alley stories with you so There you go Thank you randy for that question If you had to make a direct verbal advance on a co-worker, how would you do it? Who who paid him to ask me that question? Generally, I don't believe you should hit My simple slogan is don't get laid when you get paid.  And then you say hashtag me two All right, there you have it allen roger curry. Let's give it up for him George bruno with a 21 report in orlando florida. We're talking today with allen roger curry from Direct approach dating Dot com. What is your impression so far of the 21 convention this year? Anthony keeps Raising it to another level. Yeah, and I told him last year when I came I was blown away And I guess you could say that was also a confession of me having I guess somewhat low expectations But because I've been to other workshops and conferences that weren't quite on his level I was expecting what I was already used to And last year I was like wow and this year. I'm even like more wow Like as soon as I saw like the two screens to the side of the stage I was like, oh my god in a way like he's incorporated you and other speakers the introduced speakers That's just next level stuff It's almost like a it's like a network Uh tv studio it's set up like isn't it? Exactly. I mean that's I felt like I was at a tv station like a You know like a game show or something. It was just like hardcore professionalism there Good stuff. Good stuff. Tell us about your message. There's a lot of people. We're introducing you to a lot of people who don't know you What is direct approach dating? well In a what's known as the traction and seduction community or some people call it the pickup artist community It's basically now Kind of come to two factions you have what's known as the direct Faction and the indirect faction and there's some puas that kind of promote maybe a hybrid of both But generally a direct approach Is when from the your very first conversation with a woman you're attracted to You let her know why you're talking to her which is to either date her long term Short term monogamously non monogamously whatever your interest is you let that be known from the get-go So that in the event that she's not interested you don't waste her time You don't waste your own time whereas guys who more or so promote indirect They believe in engaging in say lengthy conversations that are sent around a lot of fluff talk And just kind of beating around a bush and they Either delay Laying their desires interests and intentions on the table or They present very dishonest disingenuous misleading desires interests and intentions classic Two classic examples for man would be Some men if they're interested in say a long-term romantic relationship with a woman They'll spend weeks months even longer Pretending like they're content with being that woman's purely platonic friend Which is a mistake because it's just setting themselves up for heartbreak because most women there's exceptions here and there But most women once they have you in the friend zone, you're never getting them friend zone describe that friend zone Is is a lot of men will use this phrase that woman put me in the friend zone But technically a man puts himself in the friend zone Because he's not honest about what type of companionship he's really looking for So the woman Just gets content with receiving all this flattering attention from this guy He spends time going with her to the bowling alley and doing various social events with her But she already has guys.    Your sister your daughter? I mean really and I can honestly a lot of harsh blowback from being on that. They look. Oh, man. What's wrong with doing that? What's wrong with doing it?  Yeah, that's really amazing So a man should take full responsibility for the zone that he's in wherever he ends up That's that's his doing Exactly. He's not a victim Oh, george. I love you. I love you guys. He's not he's not taken Off guard nothing by surprise The direct approach is a good approach. I like that. How long's that been around? Well, I started Talking about it in 1999 so almost 20 years And I'm sure, you know, it was probably around before that but I would say since the advent of the internet I will go ahead and let Harley too. I think I was one of the first guys since the advent of internet I think you are I mean, obviously when I hear direct approach your name comes to mind immediately I don't think of anyone else's name No one else comes to mind You are direct approach I appreciate you saying that. That's that's what I've seen now. Let me ask you this What is wrong With people or let me rephrase this. What do your critics say? You got to have some critics. Oh, I have quite a few. Yeah, here's the interesting thing though Here's and I already alluded to it When I first came out with my book, I did a presentation one time in Chicago. It was about 40 women and about 25 men And I just anticipated At least half of the women frowning their face mainly because When I talk about being direct as you heard about presentation I tend to use a lot of profanity a lot of x-rated language So if nothing else, I thought their face was going frown over that and I thought You know, 95% of the guys were going to have my back and give me a thumbs up Do you know george? It was almost just the opposite opposite 95% of women there Loved my presentation and even the five percent who didn't they only had a problem with the language But they loved the approach itself But a lot of guys came up to me afterwards.  What are you talking about like being honest with women, man? You know, I get women in bed by lying to them like what's wrong with that They're literally guys that they they want to lie and it basically comes down to their scared of rejection They're scared that if they straightforwardly tell a woman that all they want is short term Now I'm not even sexy that woman's gonna say, uh, no, I don't want that So they try to trick a woman into giving her It would be like, uh, I don't know if this is the best analogy, but If a guy came into a restaurant and he said I'm a vegan or a vegetarian And that chef knew he didn't have anything so he gives him this salad. He tells the guy It's a vegetarian, but he got a little small pieces of meat I mean that guy could have an allergic reaction to that. Yeah Why would anybody want someone to present them with something in such a misleading manner? And I try to make guys explain what would do you want women misleading you? Heck no I mean, no guy does but yet they think it's okay. So On it to say about your question about haters and critics. I have way more male Haters and critics than I've ever had female haters and critics. It's paradoxical because At first glance you would think like you said You think women would be the first ones to be offended, but they're not They're not offended. No wow I heard someone say haters hate because they want what you have That's very valid That's very valid Or if not they want what you have They're jealous and envious of the reception you're getting over what you have and Yeah, I have a lot of including a lot of like fellow other dating coaches and or pickup artists Because See like one thing I'm straightforward about That a lot of pickup artists aren't when I was talking about rejection is Rejection is inevitable. No man is going to bat 1000 No man's going to be able to go to a club or score with every 10 out of 10 women the approaches But you have pickup artists that try to promote that, you know, there was one guy the subtitest book was Something get any woman you want in bed. That's impossible right Brad Pitt is one of the most handsome smooth guys. He's never going to get every single and he's not going to do it and so You know, I tell I'm very open like in my book mode one in this very book I start off this book saying to eliminate any Unsubstantiated hype. I'ma tell you upfront this book is not a magic peel To prevent rejection. There are quite a few women you're going to approach you're going to express your desires interest and attention to them And guess what they're going to reject you And you just got to be man enough to accept that and move on to the next woman adventures You know, but a lot of guys out here trying to teach man how to Circumvent consent Circumvent rejection And it's backfired it's backfired on these guys What about the concept of enthusiastic consent? Like I want to I don't want to hear a yeah.  Yeah from a woman and What do you think of of seeking enthusiastic consent, which I think is consistent with the whole direct approach and the whole thing of contracts Like I can touch this this and this but you can't touch this that You know, and then you both agree on it and then move forward. What do you think of that? Well, it's funny I don't know if you're familiar with this comedian named dave chapel. I do I don't him Dave chapel when he had his show he had this popular show on comedic comedy central Yeah And one of his skits was actually called the love contract Okay, and he has this woman in bed the kiss that they make it out it did Right before they go the next step. He says hold up. Wait a minute He pulls out this clipboard as this contract and he says we need to go over some stuff The one was like, what are you talking about? And he's like, hey, I want to make sure I want to protect myself And so now I'm also someone involved in the bdsm world. Yeah And that's actually very common. That's not unusual in the bdsm world a lot of couples Who have who practice the bdsm lifestyle? They will have written contracts Yeah words so that they make sure that they don't violate no surprises. No surprises. No boundaries violated And now some guys will argue.  No No, not unless you allow it to I think it would free you Your wise man george I think I think it would free somebody because they don't have to worry about what not to do or dance around a topic or a body part Some guys don't get that. Yeah, but yeah That's the truth. You just broke it down. What type of man benefits the most from Direct approach I would say a man that does not like to waste time and or money On women who do not share the same desires interest and intentions that he does Because when you're indirect you're inevitably Going to find yourself experiencing multiple episodes where you invest a significant amount of time Or a significant amount of time and money And ultimately the woman's going to end up saying you in in in more similar terms, you're not preventing rejection by being indirect You're just Deling it procrastinating And I've experienced this in my younger years before I became fully direct and it would leave me feeling so agitated I would say spend like two or three weeks pursuing this woman's companionship being indirect only for her to ultimately tell me I don't have the same interests as you. Yeah, I just look at you as a friend Yeah, and I in her face. I would be cordial like, oh, I understand it. But you know, I get home Yeah, can't believe I wasted three weeks. Yeah, so this woman's yeah, so that's but when you're direct you know from the get go Woman's either does have the same desires interest and intentions as you do or she doesn't you know what has helped this in my In my perception from what I've seen This whole 50 shades of gray thing has kind of at least Brought the conversation out because it it's not men that are Renting that movie on amazon It's not men that are buying the book and it's a best seller and women are well, we are in the middle of a this is a um they're having a uh A festival today in downtown Orlando and a parade is driving by right here and um So we're going to hear all kinds of noise And uh, so we're just going to view it as they're celebrating and cheering what we're saying here. So But 50 shades of gray It's biggest consumer is women Isn't that direct approach Would you say yeah Here's when a lot of guys I mentioned this in my book called who said again us a today came in with article Might have been like nine or ten years now Where they said women were buying erotica novels off the shelf the by Like erotica now erotica novels are the women where I would say internet porn is the men. Okay women love erotica novels Yeah, and a lot of men don't don't don't pay attention to that don't understand that. Yeah, but The thing that women like about erotica novels the number one they're very descriptive. Yeah See like porn guys just basically come in the room and they start yeah Yeah, a lot of women that doesn't do much for them. Okay.  Yeah guys. They like I don't care about any drop this draws And whipped it out but see one of the things about the tube or a little bit I'm very good at erotic dirty talking. Yeah Matter of fact, I bet you did that same book women have actually paid me for phone sex And one thing I borrowed from erotica novels. Yeah, they have I'm very descriptive like those erotica novels. Yeah I I go real slow right very descriptive and women will just say That's interesting. Yeah, that's funny. They love that now. Let me ask you this who would Who Would actually Be against something like this who are your your biggest critics? Who are the people that are just You know Argue with you fight with you disagree with you publicly. Who are they? I don't know if I go too deep in that rabbit hole, but uh Right now on youtube I have a lot of me black men Who have been going at me real hard? Yeah, because there's a lot of black men who For lack of a better way of putting it just hate black women right now. Yeah hate them.   Sure, they do but so do some Caucasian women. So do some Asian women. So do some Hispanic and Middle Eastern women All races and ethnicities of women have their nuanced have their flaws weaknesses. So But yeah, that's probably for the last few months what I've been dealing with again specifically on youtube is a lot of black males They don't like me Because I won't trash black women in the way that they want to trash them And they look at that as me being some kind of traitor To black men, but I'm like, hey That falls into the category of haters hate because they want what you have Now here's my weakness that I'll confess because I had a I went into two days Co he called himself giving me some advice and I took it He said Ali man I watch your youtube videos and I really enjoy them He said but if you don't mind, I do have one criticism. I said, what's that? He said man, there's been at least a handful of videos you've done It seemed like you let those haters agitate you you would have these like really emphatic rebuttals to them He said man ignore them man. Yeah, forget about them, man. Don't even give them the time of day Because sometimes I have I've done these certain videos where I've just come back, you know like I've done the same thing. I just blast them back and then people say to me Wow, that was kind of a that was a harsh response And I don't know if it's because I had too much coffee that day or but there are times where I'm like All right, and I just block or delete or whatever and then there's times where I just blast them back And I kind of surprised myself with my response The people who watch your content can bring the best out of you or the worst out of you So true amazing Back to black women. I used to have a big beard got down to my belly.   She says what's up daddy?  Okay And I was right on it and my response to her was You mama your what's up? She smiled and shook her head and my joke is if I didn't grow up in the 70s I would not know how to answer that question because in the in the 70s everybody was like all women were like mama When you look at songs in the 70s like all kinds of pop songs r&b songs Women were called mama in a lot of songs. So I thought that was interesting, but I found that Black women had a more direct approach To me Which leads me to my next question is direct approach for women Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure. Can women benefit from this information? Yeah, I believe in that. I've had women Here's what's interesting. I had a woman from Atlanta black woman When my book first came out she wrote me And she said because of my book She started being more one with men And here was the interesting thing I always tell men that when you're more one more often than that Women are gonna sometimes be caught off guard. Yeah, I don't know what to say. They're gonna start fumbling over their words But this black woman explained she said men do the same thing She said she would be talking to men and say she'd do maybe two or three minutes of small talk Then she would say sorry.  All right. Now. There's someone watching this right now And they probably got their earbuds in because they don't want anyone else to hear this interview as people when people listen to podcasts and watch videos Of a nature like this They don't want their family or friends hearing that I have a lot of Viewers myself that say that they have to watch with headphones on because of some of the things that I say on youtube So someone is watching this he's alone or she's alone They're watching it on their iphone.  They might even be a mig towel and said screw women They're too hard. They're too much work a woman might say Screw men. They're all jerks. Whatever. What would you say? As a word of encouragement to that person right there who is just ready to say fuck dating i'm done with it Give them some hope Well dating is is easy As you allow it to be and it's as hard as you allow it to be I think the starting point Is first of all don't point the finger at the opposite gender for your problems disappointments and frustrations Taking a examination of yourself Which is one of the things I promote in this book mode one I have questions at the end of just about every chapter that provokes self-examination such as Why am I not honest with women about what I really want because that's where it starts That's the starting point. What do you want? What do you want?  I don't really like to say that but Be realistic if you're making I don't know You know $30,000 a year and you shoot for a woman that's making 500 grand a year. Maybe you're shooting out of your league Come down But just be honest with women about what you want always work on personal development self-improvement literally on a daily Basis so that you are the best version of yourself that you have to offer to women and then just let the chips fall where they may That's excellent. And one last question. How is success Defined how do you know when you are successful in direct approach dating? When you've taken action Oh, you never give in to the fear of rejection You never give in to the fear of being criticized insulted or receiving negative reactions from women You always take action It's not so much about every woman you meet has reciprocated your desires and interests But more so you took action You expressed your desires interests and intentions in a confident forthright manner and All that is you let what happens happens less success Alan Roger Curry This is George Bruno from the 21 report And I want to thank Alan Roger Curry author of mode one For talking to us today. I think everyone's going to benefit Thank you. Thank you so much George Welcome to 21 convention Orlando, florida 2017. I'm socrates today's guest host on 21 studios radio I'm joined by Roger Alan Curry and Richard Cooper today. I guess we're going to be starting off fast and furious Talking about fast cars loose women and chicken wings. So gentlemen, let's get going Well, I love chicken wings and uh, so much that for a few months I tried to be a raw vegan Until I went to a social event and I saw chicken wings and I was like, okay, the vegan lifestyle is not for me That's the one meat item. I cannot give up. So The only thing I love more than chicken wings is good pussy. Yes And you are known as the godfather of direct getting correct. Yeah, there's some people have given me that time Godfather verbally direct game. There we go. I want to make sure I get that right. So fantastic. Yeah, and then You know in a pua community There seems to be these two factions of direct and indirect Some people are exclusively one or the other then there's other guys like I heard ross say he kind of Likes to go either direction um, I probably lean towards more being exclusively about direct game Now see I've seen direct game My understanding is there's direct game and going fast.  You may be a little bit of that plus your origination story as well Let's talk to you you you said the key phrase you said time is critical And what I tell guys that's for me the difference between whether someone's going to favor what I refer to as mode one Verbal communication style, which is upfront specific straight to the point Versus say mode two which is more cautious and indirect I say the number one factor is how much do you value your time? because I'm the type of guy I don't like that slow setup because Some women might reject you before you've had a chance to even express your interest You do all that. Oh, how you like the weather God, do you come to this restaurant often? And before you even get to say I'm even attracted to it one was like, you know what could you just leave me alone?   I mean, I have more smooth above but essentially yeah, I let women know I would say generally within the first three sometimes within the first five minutes I would say for me no later than the five minute mark.  I'll say I'll let you know at the outs of this conversation if you're looking to recruit a new Male girlfriend play brother purely platonic male friend I'm not the guy right so we can end this conversation right now if that's what you're I know there's been a tremendous change in social media particularly with dating environment goes You know a lot of the guys and our friends will sit down and do this and I'm going to quote a particular individual His first text or message to to anybody will be you know, I want to come on your face And and girlfriend. Yeah, and you know one there's a kind of the shock element too, but it's very direct and the other is Women actually respond to it. They look at the profile see it No doubt they're they're good to go and there's so there's a lot of Women who have sexual agency or willing to express that are looking for that in man And they don't want anybody who doesn't know how to have that command of the knowing themselves But of their sexuality and they're terribly responsive to that Exactly see I feel like when you talk to a woman In some way you have to challenge Her sexual sensibilities. So if you come across as mr. Basic conventional guy Yeah, he might make her feel a little warm and fuzzy. She might say oh tilt her head. He's sweet But you haven't challenged her sensibilities And it's when you challenge her sensibilities that she feels that tingle between her legs No, we're the one that spot her when they start crossing the legs. Yeah, okay Yeah, I heard it. Yeah, I look for at least minimum two signs from a woman And I learned both of them from ex-girlfriend.   So they have to start moving Now, why do I have this belief that you know how to run a great barbecue?  Have you read his book? You know one word that repeats often is marinade, right? I'm telling you I'm gonna have to get it.    Take it for a drive and be like no That's okay. I'm good.  Yeah, like, you know, most kids that era had something like that on the wall So I've always been a complete petrolhead and I created, you know Like the YouTube thing because of my passion for fast cars and entrepreneurship and the story basically was Find friends that were successful entrepreneurs that had fast cars And they want to tell the story like the success rides about the challenges and successes You know all that kind of stuff and I did a bunch of videos And like after five or six fast cars and friends, I ran out of friends with cool cars and fast rides So I was like, oh, okay, so what do I do now? And I started talking about like business tips like how to manage lawyers and business and hire people and deal with Employee problems and things like that. And then somebody came along one day and goes You should do a video on types of women to avoid dating I don't I guess I threw off the vibe that maybe I was single or I was dating or something And I wasn't, you know, I just broken up with somebody and I was dating somebody that had Daddy issues needed to be saved and was constantly fighting with their ex over money and support And that thing blew up. It had like 400,000 views. So I was like, huh, people want to see this shit, right? So I started I started doing videos on You know dating tips understanding women better and even at that point I was still plugged in very not very blue-pilled but still but still very plugged in and it wasn't until A friend recommended a role with Tomasi's book rational male read that And that's when I really woke up. That was about a year ago actually and since then the channel's really blown up I've done a lot of videos on the topic and to be honest, you know having, you know, I come from a social Anthropological background on it. So this was nothing new to me You know, it just became culturally mainframe when the movie matrix came out But you know relatively within a year, that's a relatively short period of time Yeah, and you've you've really kind of thought and being plugged in was there any resistance to what was your process? Because I know a lot of times people talk about the world kind of being pulled out from an earth Feed and fall into a rabbit hole.  I see money as it is. I see crypto as it is I see women as it is I see, you know interactions with people like I had a conversation with somebody, you know this week And I called the motherfucker.   So that's kind of my place at the youtube space Yeah, fantastic You know what I find interesting about your stories is that it wasn't the trauma associated with the blue pill And you know plugging in with the red pill was not necessarily about necessarily relationships And I know you went through a divorce and you're talking about you know what I found very very admirable Was your relationship with your daughter? Yeah, and one of the you showed if I shared a photo of you with this You know almost superhuman body. I mean you just take tremendous part naturally And I think appropriately so but your daughter was draped around your back Like you know the cape and I just thought that was absolutely superb. Yeah, that's just a big part of my life Yeah, and you talked directly about not dating single mothers Yeah, and you know you sit down and say you you have kind of a mindset of what that would immediately entail And the first one you come out with and the most the one the the subject that you actually spent a lot of time on And I thought was very profound was the the doubling and tripling of the heartbreak Yeah, and I thought that was terribly human in a in a very clear indication of your empathetic feel For not only your needs, but also the all parties involved You know and I thought that was a terribly unique approach today And it also came up a number of other times within that list.  It doesn't matter.  It's like, you know Um, I'm spending time with you guys right now and I feel my energy level increasing. I feel stronger I feel more enthusiastic my brainwaves are kind of awake more now as opposed to having a conversation with somebody where it's like You know, they asked me for coaching advice or something that's something they're stuck on And I point to a cold heart obvious fact and they don't want to acknowledge it and it's like man, that's draining Right, right. So I think, you know, if you go through life more intentional with your time and value it Like one of the things I talked about in my chat was about um Truly value valuing your your fucks or somebody that asked in the audience. Um, I don't know what do you say it was max I'm sure you can recall it and to be honest. I think that quote that you gave is actually going to go viral Yeah, you said can you share it again to you? It was well, I can't remember what he said that triggered it But it was something along the lines of you know, how do you know when to manage your fucks or if you're giving fucks Or something that's not fuck-worthy and I'm like, well if you don't value your fucks because my concept is it's like A life bar.  It's your decision to make like you can choose whether or not to continue a conversation with a woman That's a manipulative time waster, but you've already identified. She's a manipulative time waster. No, thanks I'm going to pass I'm going to go mode one over here sort of thing, right?  So value your time. Basically is what I'm saying, right? Now moving I know you you love chicken wings everything else Is there a marinade or some other food element trying to keep with that general theme of fast cars loose women and good food Oh, I love food.   I know it's terrible My absolute sin is jack-in-the-box 99 cents three for a buck.   So Um You know, I kind of look at my body as this is this is my vessel.   You know, I would love to have a lamborghini in my garage Right now. I actually of all things I drive a nesad ultima You're gonna probably find the shocking up until recently the last five years My main my only former transportation was the best one. I'm 300 pounds six to was a pink.   There was no way I was going to out raise these guys Especially our way and overload the best but but you know, you talk about the style and adapting your style and approach and personality to the vehicle You know, it definitely wasn't high end, but as far as like scooter culture goes You aren't going to get much higher end than a vest about that.    Right. Yeah been overheard being seen for Yeah, quote inappropriate behavior And I'm like unless a any public venue has some kind of conspicuous sign that says Sexually provocative conversations are not allowed here Then that's not illegal, you know Here's here's the key thing women and this relates to my concept of the manipulative time waster If a woman is not interested in having sex with you, what does she have the choice to say? I'm not interested period But a lot of women don't want to do that. Why? Because A lot of women out here will meet men that they're not interested in being intimate with But speaking of cars that guy has a nice car They get the sense that this guy is financially generous if nothing else. He's just very Flattering entertaining and emotionally empathetic, so they don't want to reject that guy They don't want to tell that guy they're not interested So they string them along and they might say little things like oh one day Larry you might get lucky with me One day and if Larry's really naive he's thinking yeah Yeah, she's just playing hard again. She's a challenge So i'm gonna keep helping her lift these heavy boxes in her in her house And if she needs to move i'm gonna help her move and when she needs a vacuum cleaner I'm gonna help everybody heavy boxes.   They know. Yeah, okay The thing that both sexes don't know quite often Is that men are success success objects to women? Right?  Well, that's what you just said. They'll say to me. Oh, Ellen There's so many gold diggers out here. I'm tired of meeting gold diggers And then the same breath. They like man I can't wait to upgrade from a portion 9 11 to a convertible Bentley or I just bought a Rolex watch and I'm like What do you think you're going to track if if you're trying to make your material possessions your game What do you think you're going to track? You know and I tell man you you shouldn't rely on that all the material should that should be your own frosted on the cake But if you if you if you're a soul and specific motivation for accumulating certain material items Is just to pull women but you have no confidence In you as a man Then all you're going to do is have women use you and exploit you and then throw you away like yesterday's tissue And then these man just start bitching about it But yeah another thing when I lived in los angeles whenever sometimes I was in between jobs I would do what's called temp assignments And I was pursuing a career in the entertainment industry before I started doing the dating coaching thing So I worked in some departments at paramount studios 20th century fox These major movie studios and they would have me in these departments sometimes with almost all women And that's when I really solidified my concept of the manipulative time wasted because these women I guarantee if you would listen to me you guys want to just start cringing on how Little respect they have for they were like Classic example a woman would come in after lunch and say hey, Amber. How was your lunch? Oh, Linda and mine was great Hey, you remember that nerdy guy Henry. Do you know he's now paying half my mortgage every month? It would be like what?  It would be to care. They say I haven't even tongue-kissed him yet. Yeah, yeah Oh and giving you know, you know, we're right now. We're in orlando, florida It is the biggest site for sugar daddies or sugar babies In the nation. I believe it. I mean it is straight up negotiation You know and the illusion is you're exchanging values and quote dates and everything else But you just have to provide the illusion to it and it is amazing how much traffic is being generated I don't get that like like like what are your thoughts on that like when I see these women that are like, you know I want to exchange my youth sex and beauty 22 year old.  Most of the guys don't have that it's amazing You know for example, I in my talk I broke kind of broke it down the third category was provision You know when you talk about status wealth power fame, you know All those people who have achieved success have been cheated on But guys that had were physically fit and had the ability to you know directly entice Arousal as you know and sexuality and then execute on it And so you see that you don't usually see it the other way around You know a whole lot, you know, you can if they have it the other guys have part of that as well But it's it's remarkable seeing high status quote high status males That don't have self-esteem and don't know how the villager skills to actually speak for themselves In a in a positive way and not be taken advantage. You know the smart ones do I've seen a couple of my friends do this. I've got a friend of mine. He's got a Bentley Okay, he doesn't drive it for dates for the first few dates, right? He either takes an uber or he borrows a friend's car. That's like just basic I face in my own life where I stop telling people I was an architect. What do you do for 11? I just pay the bills I don't want to talk about my day job. It's not really that exciting. It's really mundane I definitely stopped taking him to the house now initially. It was great You know, you know, there's one of those things I just get a split of champagne start open I've never seen a woman, you know going back to the house just Put the champagne out and let the house sell itself Problem is is that you're drawing the wrong people. They weren't necessarily attracted to me everything else So I had to learn as a bigger guy to spot the visual cues of attraction that there were certain women that wanted a bigger guy that You know, I had that, you know, large, you know Toss them around but then still curl up with them, you know, so you had to find that vibe Now the problem is I wasn't always necessarily attracted to that So you had to kind of work your market, uh, but deal with that But it was something I had to do but it was up to me to sit down and say no, you know, I'm not doing this You know, I'm not paying for dinner It was not uncommon to see dating sites, for example Where you'd have women lists like if you want my attention, I'll respond in 24 hours if you promise to take me And my children Because I'm the whole package It was like it was stunning, you know, it's like sixes and sevens that think that you know that there are tens and elevens all day long It's not stunning. Yeah, absolutely So have you seen how much of that you see up in canada house canada, you know the market up there Well, I live in the third biggest city in north america, right? It's new york la toronto then i think chicago or something like that Or maybe miami, I don't know So it's it's yeah, it's it's happening. Yeah.   Yeah, personally, for example, I I had problems with that you know toxic individuals coming into my life And it wasn't so much just getting rid of them Particularly with women you have that kind of attraction now maybe physically attracted or I was by a woman But if she was a liberal bent, I just became like the that was a non-saturday night Seinfeld episode the soup nazi I became the cock nazi and I said no cock for you, you know and just you know deny them the cock No, and it was amazing how much drama just left my life when that happened, you know But at the same time I also had to take pride in if I was going home alone after a night with the guys No, I just avoided a shitload of problems, you know in the military, you know You don't hear the round that doesn't hit you, you know And so you know you kind of take pride in that and you know all these sort of things that you had to Slowly discover and it was horrible But you know to be able to have gentlemen like yourselves be able to convey that information Either directly through you know your websites or you know the videos I've found to be just a tremendous asset to a lot of the men that come into the convention A lot of guys I find will just they'll just pander to it.   Yeah, you know, here's my bucket list I'll show you two sort of things she goes.  What does 17 say it just remind me?  I'm like So yeah, right. She's like, well, you can't do that. That's cruelty to animals.  I'm like, we're done here. I'm like, I'm not going to have you tell me what I can't do in my life on a bucket list Yeah, because that was active negotiation. That was over active negotiations. Right, but a lot of guys be like, okay It's fine, you know, because the pussy's good or something or it's the first time I've had it in eight months It's like go away Ellen, have you ever faced that? Well, it's funny. He mentioned coot mentioned pandering See one of the things I tell guys so many guys They feel like the the the the end justifies the means and specifically When a guy is just all about getting laid Which I think is a great objective, but also emphasize how you go about getting laid so Give an extreme example.       I said, no, never Why would I get depressed? I said, obviously you you feel depressed.    He'd be heavenly denied that. He said, no, you know, you you try to use shaming language with me And blah blah blah blah And sure enough by three days later, he wrote me an email He said, okay, Alan, I gotta confess You were right He said I didn't I didn't I wasn't man enough to admit it on live the live podcast but He said when I thought about everything he said that is the truth.  Like that's a function of of men Growing up in single mother households.  When was that time we saw a television show? I think last one we saw was tim the tool man taylor Right, even that his wife would still try to take him down. Not just down, right?  I was I was It was kind of almost contradictory the industry I was trying to pursue a career and I was very critical of because I felt like they were Sending out these images to masculine man because like every time I pitched a script Was known as a spec script in the industry. That's when you write a script and you just try to pitch it to various film production companies The number one criticism I always get when I was doing a pitch guys say hey, Alan, you know You got some interesting characters here, but I gotta tell you the women are not going to like this the female audience will have an adverse reaction to this script And I'd be like, uh, so They was like, you don't understand business. That's our biggest consumer Is is women and and children and teenagers.   I got some Now this is me plugging somebody else's book other than one of my books, but There's a guy named daniel burton who wrote this book called what do women want and you guys for me with that book It's a very interesting book. It actually ends up co-signing and validating a lot of my assertions Which is why I love it. But one in particularly He kind of tagged along with a lot of sexologists who conducted various surveys accumulated research data One interesting experiment they they do in there is called the wet.  Yeah, it would start beeping and In simple terms, here's what happened. They showed women like photos of very like nice guy types or videos of guys behaving just like the polite gentleman And women would say positive things like oh, see he seems like a really sweet guy He seems like the type of guy. I was married. There was no beeps Then when they showed guys essentially being real men Being a little rough around the edges women saw that guy.  He's a player.    I said I get this one. Yeah, you don't have a rousal without tension So if it's not naturally there based on your general presence, you know, it's almost like in real estate I know you've got a real estate background. You can force appreciation by improving the place You can force that a rousal by creating tension and I think going direct it does just that Gross on the state. Yes. Yes indeed for sure for sure and yeah that that conventional I'm trying to be mr. Nice guy in this conversation with you and I'm curious cool.  I'm sure you probably get just all kinds of blow back do do the women come to your chateau and try to Not really.  People shouldn't know about it.  I'm gonna talk louder about it.    So it's as simple as that. So, you know They they want to know that you have options, but they don't want you to exercise the option So they think that by taking you down a few notches stops you from exercising those options Oh, I totally agree. My face, you know at this very convention I spoke with at least two guys Who were in situations? I want to say both of them are now either going through a divorce or they've already been divorced And they were saying that allen I think the biggest mistake I made was They said I felt like I was fairly alpha While I was dating this woman while we were engaged But then once we got married I essentially allowed my wife to transform me Into a beta male And then they they lost it.  I'm a Fan of there's this legendary street pip of all things. His name is right. His real name is Robert Beck He goes by the street named iceberg slim And he wrote this book It All the brothers know iceberg slim man He's probably one of the most well-known not the most well-known They had to do the showtime doc on him But yeah, one of the things among other things words of wisdom in his book. That's one of his big things. He says He says basically I'm a pimp And a lot of guys think because I'm a pimp all my stable holds are always going to submit to me He said no, he said women will always challenge you He said it could be as infrequently as two to three times a year It was frequently as two or three times a week But he said women are always going to challenge you to see If your backbone is still strong And that you're a man who they want to submit to and follow their lead because he said once You can in other in so many words he was saying you could be strong have strong backbone in 2014 2015 2016 But if in 2017 you start showing weakness you start allowing them to punk you They'll say themselves. Well, I can no longer follow his lead.   Why the hell would you do that?  They don't have men in their life, you know You know to kind of talk to that for a second.    Like I can't believe the stuff that they're doing and it's like what what Two things I talk about my latest with the cat collections Yeah My latest book that came out last year in 2016 is called the beta male revolution And this relates to why I asked you about blowback from single mom Generally, I try to stay away from what I feel are maybe broad generalizations But I basically assert that the vast majority of beta males Come from single mother households. Oh, yeah, there's no strong male presence there and So all their social programming As they grow up it centers around the women's should be put on a pedestal They should be played up to and I notice all the guys who try to challenge my stuff That's one of the first questions I asked them. I said, what's that household? Did you bring and now almost always say a single mother household?  I'm plugging right now.  I was led to believe all this stuff is true When now I'm seeing this bullshit, you know, and then they're like asking me for help and coaching You know, I've like like how to become asking like how do I did it like next step sort of thing, right? And you're right.  Yeah, and the absence of it women try to you know Like you see them proudly declaring on father's day.   Yeah, exactly. You need to have a movement to do just that Just just a little crazy Yeah And another issue you mentioned the terms actually spencer Oh, yeah, I just wrote a freelance column. Well, I got a lot of blowback from women But it's based on statistical fact. There are more Never been married women over the age of 35 in society right now than at any point in US history And this is where I made a quick point in my presentation, but I knew I didn't have time to elaborate on it. But when I said feminism Has had a lot of unexpected repercussions and consequences for women's falls in that category Watch what you pray for because you just might get it because look at our society pre feminism When you had a bunch of men strong in homes and the man dictated who his daughter dated and Like my mother and her two sisters They didn't even think about engaging in premarital sex or casual sex because they they all said my grandfather would have disowned them That was like They didn't even think twice about the cultural backup. You have a family backup. You have you have something You know, but then feminism these women said these are bodies.      That's what you should have been doing Right in the cocks their carousel and totally hit the wall.  It's been absolutely blast Thank you so much. Where can they find you and what products and services do you have available that you can get? All right. Well, first of all, thank you for being such a great moderator sacrates And uh, I respect both of you gentlemen highly People can find my books on amazon.com have ebooks paper bags and audio books as well as a division of amazon called audible.com have four audiobooks My main website is direct Approach dating as one word direct approach dating dot com fantastic Richard what's the best way to get a hold of you? Yeah, so I'm more of a youtuber right now I haven't kind of put out any book content yet But you can find all my shit for free on youtube and entrepreneurs and cars On youtube more active on instagram than I am on facebook or anything, but you'll find entrepreneurs and cars there I also offer coaching to guys that are stuck on something in their life Whether it's navigating a divorce understanding what's going on with female dynamics in nature and even business coaching because i'm an entrepreneur Also, that's on a platform called clarity.fm forward slash Richard cooper. Fantastic. Thank you for joining us This is sarcastically signing up with 21 21 radio. Thanks a lot for joining us This is mike with the 21 report and behind the scenes in orlando, florida for the 21 convention 2017 10-year anniversary event Sitting alongside alan roger curry alan welcome to the show. Thank you for having me mike It's been a pleasure having you here this year alan This is your first ever event and we are so happy to have you here Before we get into some questions I was wondering if you could give everyone a quick overview of your talk and why you chose to talk about it Well, my talk mainly centered on My first book which is called mode one Actually interesting enough have two subtitles. My original subtitle was mode one. Let the women know what you're really thinking But now I have an updated version called mode one Whisper into a woman's ear. What is really on your mind? in the gist of this book Is encouraging men to employ more of a upfront highly self-assured straight to the point verbal communication style And I outlined four modes of verbal communication in that book Which is mode one mode two mode three and mode four. I'll give you a quick gist of each I just actually mentioned mode one. That's that's when you whatever your desires interests and intentions are You let them know until you let it be known to a woman in a manner that's very upfront to the point Mode two is a more cautious more polite Well-mattered way of expressing your desires and interests to a woman Mode three. That's when you either keep your desires and interests totally to yourself You don't basically you don't approach women at all Or if you approach them you just have a conversation that's full of what I would like to refer to as trivial small talk And mode four is when you have undertones of bitterness Resentment and even misogyny towards a woman while you're communicating with her So that's I guess mainly what you do with clients is you try and get them from mode Four to one or three to one or two to one exactly. That's exactly what I do So in your talk you mentioned something That you called the breakthrough moment The breakthrough moment that guys have when they work with you Can you talk to that and explain what you mean by it? Yeah, I think not only as it relates to verbal communication But I think in in various aspects of life, whether it be your career dealing with friends dealing with women We all have a certain degree of fears and egotistical insecurities That are going to be Probably to the day where six feet under are going to provide challenges for us But what I refer to as a breakthrough Is when you're able to conquer a long-standing fear that was in your head Or conquer a long-standing egotistical insecurity That was in your head or it could be something simple as you weren't As motivated to achieve this goal or this objective And all of a sudden you developed a powerful sense of motivation like to finish college I would call that a motivational related breakthrough Others I would consider a confidence and or manly backbone breakthrough So in my presentation, I highlighted some fictional characters From certain movies that I felt had a Manly backbone breakthrough one would be the fictional character of George McFly From the popular movie back to the future. He was this very wimpy guy Who allowed this bully of a guy named Biff to always just bully him But towards the end of the movie finally stood up for himself And when they went back to present day You saw that his whole lifestyle Was totally different because of that breakthrough Because if he continued to live this wimpy life where he let people just step all over him His life well, he wouldn't honestly had the life of a loser But he did So you talked about having a backbone as a man What's the quickest way to get there? How can a man develop his backbone? Is it something to develop over time or is it as you said it's like a breakthrough? Yeah, I think it definitely happens over a period of time It could be a period of weeks. It could be a period of months. It could be a period of years I was saying in some cases it could be a period of decades but um I think the step number one to develop a backbone Is to allow other people's expectations of you and opinions of you and criticisms of you to remain in their head instead of yours I think there's too many people Particularly guys who walk around Well What is this person thinking me? What is that person thinking me? Well, if I say this this way, I ain't gonna have a negative reaction to it If I do this I ain't gonna have something to say Just let them have whatever thoughts they're gonna have And you decide You ask yourself, who do I want to be as a man? Who do I want to be as a man? And once you answer that question for yourself, you move forward in life with that choice And if you happen to get negative blowback from it So it just let it happen. So be it. Yeah, awesome. So Alan a lot of your work seems to be around Approaching women I'm curious to know what is your thoughts on relationships That's a good question. I get that's that here and there. Yeah um A lot of it is the same. I think Once you enter into a relationship Matter of fact, I'm glad you asked that question because I've talked to two guys since I've been in this convention And one comment they made they said like one guy I was at dinner with he said Alan Sadly, he's about to he's in the process of getting divorced But he said the mistake I made was thinking and once I got married I could just go on automatic pilot And that my wife it was just a foregone conclusion that she would always respect me as a man But he said you got to always be on top of your game. I said, that's true So one lesson I would have for man particularly related to a lot of themes of this conference A lot of talk about manhood masculinity You can't start off being an alpha male and then going to a long-term relationship or Marriage saying okay, well now I can let my guard down to be a better male No, a woman will lose respect for you a woman needs to know that she can follow your lead That's very important for women. They need to know that they can follow your lead And if you show them any behavior that suggests That your lead is not worth being followed. They lose respect for you So that applies both single men and men in long-term relationships So Alan this was your first time speaking at the 21 convention. I've got to ask What what's your thoughts about the convention? How has the experience been so far? Totally exceeded my expectations totally and Yeah, I didn't know honestly what to expect I've had some experiences with other you know More specifically just dating relationships oriented events They had their strengths. They had their weaknesses But I just didn't know what to expect and number one. I was extremely impressed when I learned I never knew that anthony was that young Yeah, so the fact that he's got this ball rolling when he was 17 just blew my mind away And the diversity of the attendees really impressed me And I've been hearing so many stories shared not only just in terms of race and ethnicity But in terms of socioeconomic background geographically And it's so well organized and the speakers are so powerful Like again, I don't want to disparage any other speaking event But there's some speaking events where it had its percentage of good speakers But that isn't just speakers where I shake my head like why is this guy even speaking? Nobody has provoked that reaction For me at this conference. I've listened attentively to every speaker And they all had great knowledge wisdom and insight to share with the audience That's great to hear Alan Um before we wrap this up If people want to learn more about you, where's the best place they can go? The best place would be www that direct approach Dating as one word direct approach dating.com. That's my main website I have another website for women and couples called mode one net m o d e o any net forward slash training And finally you can find my books on amazon.com I have a biography a biography on wikipedia.org And I'm on just about all the social media facebook twitter The rest you too awesome brilliant So with that you can get first access to Alan's talk On 21 university.com or you can click in the link below this video Alan thanks again for being here. Thank you back so much being great having you This has been mike with alan roger curry signing off for the 21 report. Thank you