the state of clean energy. I'm your host, Mitch Ewan, today and I'm calling you from the beautiful, lovely, Kenioa Bay overlooking the Marine Corps base and I apologize in advance. I have a lot of C-17s, F-14s, F-18s, ospreys, and helicopters flying overhead all the time so there may be some noise in the background. So I'm very delighted to have our special guest today, Peter Sternleit and Noe Kalipi from Sustainable Energy Hawaii. Sustainable Energy Hawaii is a new organization. They quite, I don't know if you have your website up yet, but on the Big Island and it's a, I'm not going to tell them what it is because that's what you're here for. You're going to tell us all about Sustainable Energy Hawaii. It's another project. I think did Richard Haw initiate it? Yes. He did. Great. So our friend Richard who appears on the show frequently initiated this. So Peter, take it away. Mitch. Tell us about Sustainable Energy Hawaii. So as you said this originated or was inspired by Richard Haw and he and I had been talking for you know many years about energy. Both of us have a, you know, have a personal interest in energy, the state of affairs as it is now with you know, peaking resource supplies and climate change and the fact that there are mandates being made all around the world to produce energy sustainably. One of the things that we've discovered over time that happens as we approach Sustainable Energy is people out in we'll call it the real world find themselves spending, paying a lot more. So one of our concerns is that we independently keep an eye on the the route that that the public private partnerships are taking to really to really kind of ensure that that we're taking the best route to keep things affordable. Right. So would you can knowing would you characterize that then as an educational organization and how are you how are you going to actually reach out? Well, I think you know we we originally started this is actually an older idea of Richards. I mean we a number of us were something called the Big Island Community Coalition that is an ad hoc group of community members that had been working together really focusing on food security and energy security and making sure that whatever changes happened that it was affordable and efficient and effective for everyone. So Richard always talks about looking out for the rubber slip of folks and that really was our focus, right? With that being said, you know, now that we're really looking at energy, food systems is still a big part of it, but energy in particular, we decided to rebrand the organization as Sustainable Energy Hawaii. We still serve the role that we kind of started but want to build out and scale out really serving as a catalyst and convener. So much more than quote, education, because sometimes when you say education, it kind of rubs people the wrong way, really kind of creating the opportunities to bring people together to kind of talk story and make sure that whatever we're doing as an island with sustainability, we're also looking at how does it affect everyone? How do we ensure that there's access to all of these benefits for everyone, not just those who can afford it? And are we really evaluating unintended consequences and making sure that we're doing things to support thriving economies, I mean, thriving community in the future, as well as making sure that everyone can come along. So it's really more than education. It's much more catalyst and convener, and that kind of role driving from grassroots, and then also bridging with businesses, innovation, etc. So it's a kind of neat space to be in. Okay. So Peter, what kind of energy resources, sustainable energy resources are we talking about on the big island? And kind of the issues associated, you guys can split that up? Or what are the kinds of issues that kind of rise up to the surface? Yeah, the island of Hawaii is really kind of a, I mean, I don't want to be to, you know, identify myself as an old hippie, but it's, it's kind of very, very lucky in the sense that we have access to pretty much every naturally occurring renewable source of energy. We have, we have access to both onshore and offshore wind. We have access to solar. We have access to tidal. We even have access to geothermal, which is an extremely rare resource that to be found around the world. So the opportunities are really quite broad on this island. And we're really looking at all of them. What we want to do is make the right choice. And again, the metric is really going to be how does it affect the people who end up, who are the consumers, which are businesses and, and, and individual consumers? So no, wait, what kinds of things? Let me phrase it have rubbed people the wrong way on the big island. For example, I'm very familiar, or I don't want to assume anything, but I'm fairly familiar with the geothermal law issues there. So what are the things that we can do to make it better? Like, so we're not always fighting with each other and that we're working for the common good. So how do we do that? I mean, how can we do a better job? I think there's a couple of things. One is, I think you acknowledge, first of all, all of the past issues, and you create the opportunities for people to express themselves to I think you always have to err on the side of inclusivity. Right? Let's make it transparent. Let's let's let's invite everybody to the table and let's listen and let's create that connection before we get into everybody sharing what their ideas are. Right? What do we share together? And let's identify our common interests. Before we get to how we solve the problem, right? We got to trust each other. We have to agree that we all see the problem, you know, understand how we all see the challenges that we face as a community, understand what all of our strengths are as a community. And then we get to the nitty gritty of what are the options that we can be evaluating. So it's really a different way of coming together. But I really think it's very important given the history of our of our island and the human consciousness we're seeing globally now, with with addressing everything that we really take the time to acknowledge everyone's right to have their opinions and then create that welcoming space and and making it possible for people to agree to disagree and to be able to find where there's commonality so that we can then build the trust and then move in together collectively, but we have to go step by step. So Peter, is there is there hope here? I mean, have we got such a history that people are totally entrenched? And like there's no wiggle room or there's no room for flexibility? Or do you think this kind of a can we overcome this kind of entrenchment? And what kinds of things can we, you know, what's like, what's in it for me? Like is probably maybe one of the questions we have to answer for them? Like, why would I right want to have this big plant in my backyard? So is there hope here? Well, if I if I didn't think there was hope, I wouldn't be doing this. So um, and and yes, there are there are people who are going to we're going to be entrenched. That's just that's in a sense, that's human nature. We we have firmly held beliefs and change is hard for people. And I think understanding that is really an important thing that you know, and the question about what's in it for me, I live here. So what's in it for you is the same thing that's in it for me. And so I think sometimes the entrenched positions come from inaccurate information. And that's where it gets really tricky, because you can't just say your information is bad, or you're wrong, or or something like that. It's it's a matter of, like, for instance, with the with the situation of energy, I mean, what is energy, energy? Literally, I mean, Einstein said, energy is everything. It is, it's what it's what moves you, your body, it's it, you know, there's stored sunlight in the food we eat. And it literally is the ability to do work. And so I think a fundamental regarding energy, I think it's really important to kind of almost start at the beginning to establish an understanding of what energy is. It isn't a plant that's next to my house. It's something else. And maybe there's ways to do this without putting a plant next to your house. I mean, we have that luxury on on the Big Island, because we have so much open space. But for instance, on other islands, that's going to be really tough. So just does your organization only address the Big Island? Are you looking at yourself as a Hawaii wide organization? Or is it too early to even comment on that? Was was that addressed to me? Well, yes, we'll go with you. Seems how you asked. I was going to say initially, initially, yes, it is, it is, we are, we are thinking locally, at least at the beginning. I've sort of made the analogy that it's, you know, in a situation in an existential crisis like this, it's sort of like what they tell you on an airplane, put your own mask on first. And then you can put the mask on your child or, you know, or help other people. So the answer to that is a broad no, it's not just Hawaii Island, but it is Hawaii Island is definitely our starting place. Right. That was a great answer. So no way. You know, the geothermal is one of the most projects that just generated like so much antagonism. But it was really interesting that when HECO Helico came out with an IRFP for additional 25 megawatts of power, then all of a sudden some of the biggest opponents of geothermal form groups that actually bid on the projects, for example, Mililani Trask went from, you know, going to jail, I guess, she got arrested. Maybe I got that wrong, but to seemingly being supportive of it. And part of that was because I think they were more inclusive. So what's your comment? Did you have any experience with that project? And what do you think about that? I did not have experience with that RFP or that project, but I think that speaks to the point of inclusivity, right? When people understand when people are included and when there's access to the solutions, then everybody can participate. Right. So it's that much more important to make sure that we have widespread access to the opportunities that we're having, the discussions that allow us to get past and through perceptions, right? Explore the diversity of perceptions that allow us to get to the substance of the discussion. So I think that's a classic example of when there's broad understanding at a technical level and the inclusivity and the access to the solutions, what a community can come forth and do. So getting back right down to the nuts and bolts of how do you actually do that? I mean, you know, we can talk high level stuff and all that. Do we have multiple potluck dinners like we have up at Pu'uawa Ranch where we sit around the table just talk story, brainstorm, do mind mapping and just let everybody get their opinion in and then just try and just work together. How is that going to work? This is for nobody. Yeah, it depends on the situation. It depends on the part of the project, right? The good thing about Big Island Community Coalition and now Sustainable Energy of Hawaii is that we have a broad network of individuals and we live in an island. Everybody's either related or knows each other, right? So you can talk story. If you keep it at the talk story level just like how we're doing right now, we can share, right? We can look at that. And then we build up there. So given, first of all, it's a broad network of individuals talking about an issue, right? And then it's the convening, like then depending on the part of the district, depending on which technology we're looking at, right? We can bring those who are interested and then we can make it available to everyone to be able to to participate. So it is, it's all of the above Mitch. It's a yes and it's Pu'uawa having their dinners. It's us having our family discussions. It's potentially us doing small YouTube videos that allow you to facilitate yourself where I say, you know, we can explain the issue and say press pause and go talk with your family about this and fill out this Google form so that we can collect your information in your monologue and then let's share that widely on a on a website and or on a platform that we can all take a look at how did we dive deep and where are the common themes? Like I think there's multiple ways to be able to do it, but it depends. Like if we're talking about something like building a hydrogen economy on on Hawaii Island, then we look at, right? Then we look at what are the what are the low hanging fruit sources of electricity that would allow for us to demonstrate the viability of that, right? And then you would then you would convene around those things. So so I think it's all of the above and it's very fact specific and situation specific as to how we do it. Right. So Peter, you have a background in film, the film industry, as I understand it, like like you're a major for your major player in Hollywood and no, no, no, no, I there everybody's a major player. It's just like everybody that's an actor is, you know, has an has a day job where they're waiting tables. But I did spend a lot of time in that industry. It's it's changed. I was lucky enough to be around for virtually the entirety of it going from film to data. And, you know, it's it was it was a fabulous experience. I love living in a rural community. I do not miss. I do not miss. I miss my family, but I do not miss the main line. Well, how can you put your experience in the film industry, which is really, you know, communications to good use for sustainable energy Hawaii? I mean, where are the opportunities here for you to apply something during knowledge and help us all out? Yeah, well, over, you know, over the the years that I've been here, I've done volunteer video work, some of which I've done for Richard for the University of Hawaii, for Pueo, for the astronomy community here. And I've done I've done some work for the International Moon Base Alliance. But you know, it was just talking about the kind of video communication that we can be doing. There's I think there's a great opportunity within this organization to use multimedia to be able to to further the understanding about what energy is how what roles it plays in our lives. Ask the questions. Do you want to live with this? Do you want to live without this? What are the alternatives? Because one thing for sure is the way we live today cannot continue. It just is not sustainable. And, you know, one of the speaking of sustainability, I mean, being sustainable means that it can go for a really long time. And that does not mean unlimited growth. That means it's essentially stasis, and it's self supporting. It's an ecosystem that that provides opportunity and support for all who live within it. So I think communicating that is something people like video they mean much more than reading. And so I think the opportunity to get that kind of information out there, let people digest it is someplace I can put my focus. That'd be awesome. So no, a question for you is, how do we pay for all of this? You have funding sources and you got like wealthy deep pockets out there that want to support this organization? How are you going to pay for this? Because, you know, to put on really good and get really good information out there, great videos, great marketing materials, takes money. So the answer is sure we have a fundraising plan that we would get to eventually. But the beauty of talking story, the beauty of the network of individuals we have working with us is we don't need a lot of money to get started. We don't need a lot of money to host a potluck. We don't need a lot of money to put a put a video that can go up into YouTube and create a Google forum where we can collect your information. Convening, you know, doesn't this is this is a volunteer organization and network, right? And that's why our role is as a as a catalyst and as a convener as opposed to we want to have a business plan and we want to become the company. That's not what we're trying to do here. We're trying to create the opportunities for those things to occur. What our job is really to keep the grass roots and the and the businesses and keep it be the bridge between everybody and it doesn't take a lot of money to be able to do that. So if you started to reach out yet to some of the community leaders and if you have, have you got a feel for the reception towards sustainable energy Hawaii? We're we're we're early early in the process. So we've had some very early discussions. But we're still moving through that. That's why we don't even have our website up yet, right? I mean, essentially, we're big island community coalition reborn. And there's a bunch of us having individual discussions given the networks that we have in our experience in this area. But as a group, we haven't yet formally begun presenting. Okay. So how about the new political leadership that we're going to be seeing as these elections run out? How do you view the current crop of politicos?  Why would there be any pushback? But how do you see that developing? I'm assuming this is for me. It's definitely for you. You know, if I think the shared interest we have amongst all of our elected leaders is particularly post COVID is how do we have strong community? How do we build thriving economies, etc. The issues that we're talking about lead to those. So so it's not like we're we're pushing one technology over another. We're saying how can we be sustainable? Given given that there's a level of urgency outside all of our control. And and I don't think there's much of a choice anymore about having to take action in these areas. So, Peter, as one of my pet projects, obviously this in the background hydrogen, and I'm really kind of focused on zero mission buses for the big island. And my my objective is to develop a really, really great bus system that's on time. There's plenty of buses. It's the first choice anybody makes when they want to go from A to B. How can you guys support my project? That's for Peter. Well, first of all, we do support it. And we've we've become aware of of what your goals are. And we absolutely support it. You know, in you know, with boots on the ground, that's certainly something we should explore. I mean, of course, media is is one of them.  Well, but you know, that's yeah, let's offline. Let's let's put our heads together and see where we go with it. Right. So you've both heard about Riley Seydow's transportation services contracting initiative that he took. I think I mean, I'll just give an opinion because I'm allowed to talk here too.  How do they get paid? And up till now, you know, it's been kind of piecemeal. Like if the county has a little bit of budget, well, we'll buy one bus this year, maybe two buses the next year, zero buses like they did for like three years. And that's why the bus system has fallen into disrepair like it has. But transportation services contract is a public private partnership where a private company comes in and buys all the buses. So theoretically, you know, you can buy 65 buses in one shot and it's backed up by the county. So in a way, this really helps, as you say, the River Slipper people. I can't quite pronounce the Slipper, right? But, you know, people have to get to work and they have to commute. And I'm just throwing that out as a kind of a project that kind of is needs to be a sustainable energy Hawaii project. So what do you think about that, Noe? Definitely, I think I think I mean, whether you're asking about the project itself and or the funding mechanism, I think it's a good example of a public private partnership that's looking at how do we make the sustainable and how do we scale it such that everybody can benefit, right? You're meeting a transportation need, you're meeting the infrastructure need, you're meeting the sustained economic need, right? And so then what do we need to create to support that system in place and what can then be spun off because of that demonstration, right? So that's clearly something that those are definitely the kinds of initiatives we'd want to talk about.  Well, and also we can use that as a venue to promote sustainable energy Hawaii because, you know, it's all going to be run on sustainable energy. And so there's the people, you know, to the taxpayers, basically, and it helps them go to work and helps them go to the store, helps the young kids get to school. I mean, I've heard stories about down in some of the we have these big subdivisions on the Big Island, little kiddos have to walk like I've heard three or four miles, you know. Yeah. I mean, that's that's a long walk. I mean, I go for my evening walk for two hours. I'm knackered. So yeah, definitely. Yeah.  I wish I was, man. Yeah. But those are exactly the kinds of needs, you know, that we need to be addressing. Those are real needs, right? And so if the projects can address the real needs as you demonstrate why this works, as you demonstrate how innovation happens, as you demonstrate how you it's a spectrum, right, of of of action, you don't just, you know, erase everything and start anew. You got to work within the system that you have, right? And you build strengths, you build trust in it. And and by addressing real needs, that's how we're going to be able to be as inclusive and make sure that everybody sharing in the benefit. Well, I think that's really I'm sorry. I was going to say, I think the point that you made about, you know, the county buying one bus this year versus, you know, versus having the ability, the financial support to to buy 65 buses. So scale is what's what obviously is needed to make it practical for the county for the public. And so being able to bridge that gap between the lab and the marketplace is the real challenge, you know, crossing the chasm as it were. And, you know, so that's that's that's the funding conundrum, because clearly on an economic level, what we want to be able to do is to have local ownership of whatever this is, be at the county or whether it's local local business or whether it's a now I'm blanking on the word. It's when the when the community up something co-op or a co-op. So so I mean, ultimately from the standpoint of the street people, the street businesses, we want local ownership instead of ownership somewhere in Europe. Right. Exactly. OK, well, believe it or not, guys, we've blown through almost 30 minutes and 29 minutes and 56 seconds. So it really goes fast. Just one time, what's what are your quickly? What are your timelines? No way. What's what's what's the schedule here? Well, what we're doing is we're getting everything put together and we're going to start having meetings. So over the next six months, we'll be working to build relationship to share the information and really to co-create this with our community. OK, well, Peter and now we thank you so much for sharing a sustainable energy Hawaii. Obviously, we all have a stake in this and whatever I can do to help, I will come back on the show when you have some additional specific messages or if you even want to make a specific video. Peter, here's your chance to do that. We love doing that kind of stuff. And with that, I hear the hook. There you go. Well, you look at it as a resource, because no, no, no, no, it's definitely a resource. Well, with that, thank you. Thank you so much, Peter. Thank you, Noe. And this is Hawaii, the state of clean energy, saying aloha.


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and welcome everybody for attending this presentation on procrastination. Let's face it, how many of us actually procrastinate? Well, I'm going to say, actually, let me go back to the beginning here. Let's play from the start. There we go. We all procrastinate. It is simply the way that we do things. We put off tomorrow what we could do today, and we have lots of reasons why that is the case. So, as Leah mentioned to you, and I'm just going to try to figure out why I'm not moving forward here. Hold on a second. There we go. I'm a keynote speaker. I'm the author of The Fearless Factor, The Fearless Factor at Work, and I'm the creator of transformational strategies for success, an online self-awareness self-development program, and I'm also a trusted advisor to high-achieving women. This is one of the things that I truly believe. We are willing to face our limited beliefs and overcome any obstacles that we face. Now, if you think about that for a second when we procrastinate, that is definitely a piece. Limited beliefs and the obstacles that we face, we frequently put off facing those things because they make us very uncomfortable. And we're going to discuss this and much more as we go forward into this presentation today to talk about the reasons why we procrastinate, what we can do to overcome our procrastination, and the ways in which we can start to think about those limited beliefs and overcoming obstacles. And if any of you were here last month when I made a presentation on why fear matters to your success, we're also going to touch upon that delicate subject as well. So I hope you're going to dig in here, take some notes, and if you have any questions coming up, I know that Leah will be handling those for me, and I'm open to anything that you might have to to ask me or any questions you might have, whatever the case may be. We will have time for some Q&A as we go forward with this. So let us dive in and see where we're at with this. How we procrastinate. Okay, so here we go with this one. Move my camera. Filling your day with low priority tasks, the important stuff gets left to later. We read emails, and we know we need to make some action on it, but we avoid it. We are definitely caught up in distractions. We don't follow through. We say yes to unimportant tasks, and we wait for the right time or the right mood.  How many of these things can you nod your head and say yes to? I know that I certainly can, because as I said earlier, we all procrastinate in our own ways. And that procrastination is what undermines our taking actions, which undermines our ability to achieve the things that we want to achieve, and undermines our ability to truly rise to the occasion on the things that are very important to us. So as you're thinking about how you procrastinate, I'd like you to share with me, if you will, how do you procrastinate? And I'm willing to look at the chat here to see what you got going on. So how do you procrastinate? Seeing yes to unimportant tasks, waiting for the right time or the right mood. Absolutely. That's another big one that we get to. All of the things on the list, what's missing on this list that you could say is part of what you do? Chores, yes. What else? There's a lot of people on this call, and I know you're all here because you all procrastinate. So tell me more. You take naps, you're daydreaming, you watch YouTube or Netflix or whatever the case may be. Yeah, phone games. Look at all the ways in which we procrastinate, the ways we avoid things. Low priority tasks, yeah. We look at our list of to-dos, and then we think to ourselves, yeah, I'll do it later. Volunteer work, I'm not sure that's so much of a procrastination, but certainly can be. Mindless social media, God knows how many hours we spend on social media instead of getting on with what we need to get on with. So you can see there are lots of ways that we can actually get into the whole procrastination thing. There you go. Volunteer work doesn't pay the bills. I agree with you, but it does make you feel good. So here's the excuses that we have going on with regards to our procrastination. It'll be difficult. It is too risky. It takes too long. I can't afford it. I'm not smart enough. I don't have the energy. I'll start tomorrow. So think about that for a second. It will be difficult. Maybe, maybe not. Is it risky? Maybe, maybe not. It will take a long time. There's a, there's a big reason right here why many of us don't get started on things, because it'll take too long. I can't afford it. Where do we not invest in ourselves? Where do we not invest in getting the services that we need in order to move ourselves forward? The I'm not smart enough quote is frankly, another excuse about where you get caught up in. I don't have the right resources. I don't have enough information. Somebody else is smarter than me. I'll just let that go. You see that a lot at work, frankly. And I don't have the energy. Well, that's where you can turn on YouTube. You can turn on Netflix. You can go play games instead of thinking about the more important things that you need to be doing. And of course, you know, turning your tomorrow into today is always about mañana and how we go from there. And again, I'm going to ask you, what's your thinking on this? What excuses do you have that's different from what I have here? And someone said waiting for the right time, but it never comes. It's very true. What other thoughts have you got going on through regards to excuses? You don't feel like it.  That means you're giving up before you've even had an opportunity to find out if you could actually do this. And how many times does that get in the way of you really bringing your brilliance to the things that you do? Any other thoughts on this? Overwhelmed. Is that an overwhelm before you even begin because your list is too long? And that happens a lot because the to-do list never gets any shorter. And so we have to choose which on this list is really the things that need to be focused on. What's important? So fearing the outcome and so just ignore it and then it gets worse and worse. That's a big one right there because if we've made up a story about what the outcome is going to be, and I touched upon this in my last presentation, then of course you're just going to keep putting it off until it's absolutely on top of you. How many people say they love deadlines? How many people feel like they procrastinate until that deadline is absolutely upon them?  I know I've done that many, many times. Like I knew I had to do something but I wait until I'm about a week out or a day out from the deadline and then you dig in and you find out that it was nowhere near as bad as you thought it was going to be. It's actually a lot easier. And it does put a fire on underneath you to push you to get things done. But why wait for the deadline? Because the stress of this is enormous. Guess what?  I need to get it done. I must get it done. I've got to make more time for this. I'm not quite sure why I keep avoiding this. And then you've got the deadline which says do it and then you do it and then you think well what was so hard about that? And I think that's, anybody disagree with me on that one? And once you get there you find that it's nowhere near as hard as you thought it would be. Ah, perfection. Now there's a big one for you. Perfection is something that drives a lot of people into a hole because it's never good enough. And perfection is literally the enemy of excellence. And I'm going to repeat that again. Perfection is the enemy of excellence. Why? Because there's no such thing as an end point on perfection because it doesn't exist. Japanese have a wonderful philosophy on perfection. It's called the art of the wabi-sabi. And that's W-A-B-I-S-A-B-I. Look it up. And basically what it is, it's the art of imperfection. And when I first heard about that I thought, that's our lives. Our lives are imperfect because we as a human species are imperfect. And the procrastination that we've got going on around I need to get it right first time is that fear of failure which strikes a lot of people, frankly. And the fear of failure, I've talked about this before in the last presentation but for those of you who weren't here, what is failure but a choice of decision or an expectation that did not go the way that you had planned? And there is only one word that you need to use for that and it's next. So if you're procrastinating because you're afraid that you're going to fail before you've even begun, then we're back to what was Yoda's advice which is there is no try, there is only do. So when we think about why we avoid these things, I would suggest that you give that a little bit more thought because we're all failing our way to success. And I think I want you to take that in a second. We're all failing our way to success. You can't expect it to work the right first time. But if it does, that's terrific. So if you're putting off because of that, give that another thought. Let's move it along to the next slide here where we procrastinate. Let's look at that for a second. Undesirable work projects. God knows we've all had a lot of those. Somebody throws something on your desk and says I want it by next week and you wait until the absolute last day to do it because you didn't want to do it in the first place. Challenging work projects. That's where the I'm not smart enough piece comes in. Somebody hold hands you something that you think might well be outside of your knowledge, outside of your awareness, whatever the case may be. Challenging work projects are pushing you to reach for something bigger than you think you're capable of doing. So where do we hold back on that? Where do we get into that we voice that says you're not good enough? Where do we get into that place of you're stupid? Where'd you get into that place of there's no way I'm going to be able to handle this? And why how do we deal with that differently? That becomes the big question because when you're given undesirable work projects, that's pretty obvious. It's like, you know, this is the grunt work or this is something that's beneath me or something I really don't enjoy doing. And we could say the same thing about challenging work projects. But here's the thing about challenging work projects. They're meant to push you. They're meant to get you to show up differently. They're meant to get you to stretch yourself. Ending something uncomfortable.  And the same thing can be applied to jobs. How many jobs do you stay in simply because it pays the bills? And what would it look like if you could actually address some of those issues and not procrastinate on it? The fear of making a mistake or failing, I've already covered that one. And starting a project, well, again, that comes down to there's a lot more here than I need to do. And again, I can point to myself and say, yeah, as many times I've looked at starting a project, I put it off, I put it off, put it off until finally you can't put it off anymore and you get started on it. And then you find out that when you get into it, it's never near. It's nowhere near as bad as you think it's going to be. Feeling overwhelmed, this has got to do with details. When we feel like we've got too much on our plate and frankly, there's a lot of problems with this in the workplace right now, the people feeling burned out, feeling like they've had got too much work to do, feeling like they can't manage things. There's a whole self-esteem issue attached to this, by the way, because I truly believe that burnout is a self-esteem issue. And it's easy to feel overwhelmed. So how do you break it down? How do we get into creating space for ourselves to see some of the details? And here's the big thing about feeling overwhelmed. Being able to say no, no to the things that you really want and no to the things that you don't want. And this is a big piece right now.  So feeling overwhelmed is easy. When your to-do list has a list of 30 things on it, and you need to boil it down to what do I really need and what do I not need? Because frequently, we're taking on far more. How many of you on this call right now are very good at saying yes. I'm going to put the chat up again. I want to say how many of you actually say yes when you should be saying no to things that don't work for you. So the saying of no is a hard one. No is this very, very small word with a tremendous impact. But here's the thing, if you're someone who likes to people please, who likes to make sure that everybody else is taking care of before you take care of yourself, it's very easy to feel overwhelmed because that yes becomes an automatic response. You must learn how to say no, that doesn't work for me. No, that doesn't serve my needs. Because when we are feeling overwhelmed, it is frequently because we've said yes too many times. And I know there's a lot of you on the call right now who can relate to that.  We could do a whole section on that one. Speaking up and making a decision. Speaking up is a big one. And I just did an event for an organization called Speak Up Women. And for the women on the call right now, I would say speaking up is a big issue. Many women don't ask for what they want. They don't speak up in meetings. They don't allow themselves to take ownership and authority of their specific roles. And they allow other people to make the decisions for them. Making a decision can sometimes feel like it's dangerous. If you make a decision, then someone else is going to shoot it down. If you speak up, somebody else is going to speak over you. There's a whole lot of issues around those two particular parts of why we procrastinate. If I speak up, it's dangerous. I'm taking risks. If I make a decision, I'm taking risks. The risk taking is where we need to push ourselves to go forward. So how many of you on this call right now have trouble with speaking up for what you want, what you need, and forgiving yourself the space to be seen and heard? I would hazard to guess that there's quite a few of you on this call who feel that way. How many of you have trouble making decisions? Maybe there's too many options. Yeah. So I'm looking at the women who are responding here. Absolutely. I see this all the time. Self-doubt gets in the way. And all of these are about self-doubt one way or another. And when we fail to speak up, we watch other people take the opportunities. When we fail to make a decision, then other people will step into it and we lose out. And when we procrastinate in general, we're not seizing opportunities that could actually serve us and move our lives forward in a more significant way. In order for us to really step into that place of confidence, of ownership, of authority, we must possess the determination, the resilience, and the perseverance to withstand the challenges that come our way. Many of us don't feel like we are good enough. We struggle with whether we're bright enough. We struggle with whether we'll be acceptable. We struggle with the sense that somehow we don't have the goods on how to step up and really be seen properly. But if you are determined, and I like to say my middle name is determined, there's a reason why I write about fear and write books on the fearless factor is because I am determined. I am resilient and I do persevere. And we're going to talk about some of these elements in a moment when I move through this. Procrastination is essentially insecurity. It's about uncertainty. It's about not knowing if you have all the relevant information. And when you procrastinate, when you feel like you're letting yourself down, you can develop a deep sense of shame around that. And that's when you call yourself names. You're lazy, you're incompetent, you're incapable, none of which is true. And when you stay focused on the wrong things, then of course, time passes by and you're still no further forward with what matters to you. But I like to say that the direction you take is not as important as the act of beginning because procrastination frequently is I haven't even begun to get started. So let's talk about that in the chat for a second. Talk to me about what you think when you read this, what comes up for you. And having other people make decisions for you is not necessarily the way you want to go because frequently when we let other people make decisions for us, they're not the decisions that we would have chosen if we had the power to speak up and say what it is that we want. So as you think about these particular issues, procrastination is often about uncertainty. Anybody disagree with me on this one? Yeah, the fear of failure is a big one for sure for a lot of people. I like it, draft a plan. Yeah, progress, not perfection. And the fear of success, fear of success and fear of failure are two sides of the same coin. And they come down to the same thing. I'm afraid that I'm not good enough. The fear of success is actually that fundamental piece. I'm not good enough. But to actually admit that openly takes courage, but it's also about taking that next step. Because what I like to say is that being fearless is not the absence of fear, but it's the courage to take the next step. And that next step can be as big or small as you want it to be. And the same thing is true of managing your procrastination. And not making a decision or a choice is a decision or a choice. And that, of course, as you said, I often let time make the decision for me. And that's usually when you're backs against the wall. But the first step is just start. Are you addicted to stress? Some of us are. There's good stress. And then there's really bad stress.  You don't want the confrontations. You don't want to have to make a decision. You don't want to have to boil things down so that you can really take that first step to make it happen. And so each day is the list gets longer and longer. Guess what? You get more and more of that feeling of uncertainty and that sense of shame about you're better than this. Because the truth of it that is you are better than this. And the excuses that you use as to why you don't move forward are simply that. They're simply excuses.  If they're going to come up with excuses, they better have a really good reason for it. Otherwise, I'm going to chase them. Here's the fearless markers of success. And this is something that I learned doing martial arts for many years. I hold a black belt in karate. And I also did CrossFit for several years as well. And one of the things that I know for sure and why I've earned this title of being fearless and determined is these six things. In martial arts, I realized that if you're going to be in a fight, you've got to be committed to the fight. You've got to be all in. You've got to be focused on your opponent. And that's not on their arms and legs and where that's going. But you've got to be looking in their eyes. Because when you look in someone's eyes, you're going to see the whole picture. You've got to be disciplined enough to do thousands of hours of repetition, repetitions over and over again. And then you've got to have the follow through. Somebody throws a punch. You've got to be able to counter that in some way. You've got to be consistent in your actions, which means you get to do the same thing over and over again. And when you get knocked down, you have to have perseverance to get back up again. Because otherwise, the fight is over. And when I thought about all these elements that was in this piece doing martial arts, I realized that all of this is relevant to our success. Every single part of this, you've got to be committed. If you're going to get past your procrastination, you've got to be committed to making a move. You've got to be focused on where you're making a move to. And you've got to be disciplined to be able to push yourself past that point of saying, I can't be bothered. And you've got to follow through with the actions that you need to take and be consistent in the ways in which you're showing up for yourself. And when you do fail, and when things don't go the way that you had planned, you persevere and you move beyond it. So once more, I'm going to open up the chat and I'm going to ask, which part of this do you get stuck on? Follow through, focus, consistency. Yeah. What else? Distracted by other items, absolutely, bright, shiny objects, discipline, focus and perseverance. Yeah. Follow through. Follow through is a big one for a lot of people. Just getting started. They're all the same thing. No, they're not, actually. They're not all the same thing. They're very different in the ways in which they show up in our lives. And what I see in this chat right now is the follow through is the biggest piece where most people fall down. And that's where we procrastinate. You might think you've got the commitment. You might feel like you're focused on what you need to do. You might feel like somehow you've got the discipline, but the follow through is where we fall down. And that's a problem. And distractions are real.  Social media is the biggest one of all. I heard a statistic the other day. I can't remember the exact number, but it was very high in terms of the number of people who spend a great deal of their day on social media. And the question for that is how is that serving you? It's very nice to watch TikTok videos, Instagram videos, posting, Facebook, all of that. It's a great distraction, but it doesn't get you where you want to go. And that's why I make a point of this on procrastination. Yeah. And yeah, at 82, it's harder to keep focus. Yes. And technology is going to be way beyond you no matter what, Marjorie. We can't keep up with this. And social media is part of your jobs. If that's your focus, if you're in marketing, then that's very much a big piece of it. But again, we've got to be careful about how much time we're putting into it and overlooking the things that actually do make a difference in our lives. Yeah. What can you do today? So here are some questions that you can ask yourself as you go forward. What is your priority today? And why? What can wait until tomorrow? Realistically wait until tomorrow? And what resources do you currently have in order to start your project or continue with your project? And what resources do you still need? What do you still need to complete, eliminate or clear out that is either a distraction or no longer serves you? We touched on that with social media. But what else is there? What else is getting in the way that you can completely eliminate? And let's go back into the chat again, because this is a very interactive presentation today. And I want to hear from you. When you look at these questions, what do you think you want to focus on? I can tell you right now that starting with number one, what is your priority today? And why is a very good question to start your day with? Because if you start your day with 20 things on the list, that's not your priority. That's just a list. So if you look at what's the most important thing that you need to achieve today, and then ask yourself why, you're probably going to come up with a very good answer that will help drive you and motivate you to take action. So why is important? But think about the why there. Why am I doing what I'm doing? Why do I do what I'm doing? Well, I do what I do simply because I want to see people change. I've spent my years going through the change process. As Leah said at the beginning, 35 years, I'm probably more of going through some really major changes in my life. And that's what drives me today to help other people, because I've done it. And I know exactly what this stuff looks and feels like. So if you can figure out what can wait till tomorrow may be a clear purpose, well, again, you're waiting for the lightning to strike and give you the inspiration you need in order to move forward. So let's talk about that one for a second. We don't want to wait until we're inspired. We want to wait until we're clear on what action to take. But then again, is that another excuse? Is that another form of procrastinating? Or is it that you miss business hours as someone just pointed out here? So what can wait until tomorrow that's realistic, not about I'll shelve it? And how can you make the lightning strike? If we all knew that, we would turn it on like a light switch. So nope, I can't tell you the answer to that one, but I can tell you on a practical level, what can I handle today that would make a difference? That is the big question, isn't it? What can I handle today that would make a difference to tomorrow? And that's a big question. So right now, what are you procrastinating on? Let's dig into that one for a second. What are you procrastinating on at the moment? You want to taxes? Yes, it's April. Repairing a leak in your RV, putting together a new bed frame, sending emails, homework assignments, exercising. Oh yeah, we can all procrastinate on the exercising. There's always other things to do. See, everybody's got something that they can move forward on. So if it's cleaning the house, maybe you start with a bathroom and you're right about the programming of the past. That's a whole other story right there. And as a writer, you just have to write every day. Some days I'm inspired and some days not so much. If I start writing, I become inspired. Well, good writers know that the first draft of anything is called the shitty first draft. We don't expect perfection on the first go around. And as a writer, I can say that. And again, looking for a new job, are you settling for safety? Or is it simply it feels overwhelming? So there's a lot of ways in which we look at stuff in our lives. And I like the idea that was put here. Having a project buddy would help. I agree with you. Accountability is half the battle. Tell somebody what you are procrastinating on and you then have to go do something about it. Of course, you know, a lot of people could say, you know, as Estefania says right now, cleaning my car, you could tell somebody you need to clean your car. That's not really important. But the project buddy or accountability is an excellent idea because you want people to hold your feet to the fire. Did you get it done? Now you don't want to be a nag on this, that's for sure. But if you allow other people into this conversation, they can be there to support you and give you some ideas on how you can handle this differently if you're struggling. Two minds are better than one in many respects. Okay, so I'm going to talk to you about this one, be intentional.  That is called being intentional.  So here's the homework for you. Identify three important tasks that must be done in the next two weeks. Okay, number one, three important tasks that must be done in the next two weeks, that you will give yourself a deadline for, and that you will make a commitment to doing, that you will actually put your focus into the materials or whatever it is that you need to do to take those next steps. And that you will find the discipline and determination necessary for you to follow through and take consistent actions so that you achieve the results that you say you want. Determine what time of the day is best for you to stay focused. For many people, if you're a night owl, it's the nighttime.  I do some of my best writing between four and six in the morning. A lot of people would say that's crazy, but I am completely focused at that time. I don't have any distractions. Nobody's emailing me at four o'clock in the morning, that's for sure. And I'm not really interested in social media either at four o'clock in the morning. So I focus on my writing and I focus on the ways in which I can express myself early hours in the morning. But I also know people who do that well at one o'clock in the morning. By that time, I'm sound asleep. Or at least I should be. Block your time on the calendar and stick to it.  Certainly many business professionals give out that advice and you can see it on your calendar and you can also ignore it. Ah, yes, I put two hours in there for this project. And guess what? I sat on LinkedIn or Facebook for an hour and there with that time is gone. So again, the discipline of sticking to it is really the big piece for you. Don't allow distractions like phones, browsing people, and such to get in the way. Now, sometimes it's unavoidable, but you can turn your phone off. You can shut down the internet if you don't need it for what you're doing. And as far as people is concerned, you can let them know that you're not to be interrupted. And whatever other ways that that you find get in your way. So let's go back in the chat a second and talk about what you're going to make a commitment to. So Amalinda says she created a spreadsheet. That's perfection in me. And I have to say I am spreadsheet allergic. I look at spreadsheets and I go, it's too much detail. So I would procrastinate on creating a spreadsheet. I can tell you that right now. I'd much rather somebody else did it for me. So when your family distracts you and they make you feel guilty for setting boundaries, how do you manage that? So this is a problem when when their expectations is that you're just going to show up because somebody else said for you to be there. But when you're setting some boundaries for yourself on that, Estefania, you've got to be able to say to people, this is important to me. And I know that you really need my time right now, but I just can't be interrupted whilst I do this. So this is about communication.  So setting that boundary for yourself is a new habit. And you've got to educate people into it by being sensitive to it. And especially for women, they're used to women being available all the time. But this is where women and you yourself have to learn how to say, no, that doesn't work for me. The timing is not right for me. I have other things that I need to be doing. I like this idea of spoons of energy per day. We are all energy beings. Every part of us is energy. That's what we bring to the world. And when we're busy giving it away to other people all the time, guess what? It's not a whole hell of a lot left for you. So you might want to think about how much you're willing to say yes, and set some better boundaries for yourself. So I agree with Martin. It's like, you know, setting a clear shift of priorities for the day. And I used to hide in the bathroom. One of the people's knees got to be too much. Yeah. And if you didn't hide in the bathroom, you would be able to say not now. I'm sorry. I can't help you right this second. That takes a lot of courage. And when people are not used to being addressed that way, it's a problem. It's the same bathroom you need to clean. Well, why don't you get at it while you're there? You might as well have a laugh about that one. I love it. Okay.  You know, we all have self-discipline. It's in there. But you've got to believe it, that you can in fact carry through with what you say you want to do. And I hope if nothing else today, you're taking at least one little nugget away from what I've said so far that might be helpful. In fact, share with me if you have discovered any little nuggets that might be helpful to you today. There must be something in here that I've said that's going to stick with you. Okay. I love it. Noticing where you procrastinate. So you consider options. Absolutely. Yeah. Isn't it amazing, Susan, that there is so much that you all have in common here? Yeah. There's no real rocket science to this, frankly. We can all find shades of it, including me who's giving this presentation today. You know, we can all relate to it. It's all very relatable. But it's not just about knowing about it. It's about doing something about it. And yeah, you're not alone. And if you talk to anybody, and you were to give them the same information that I've just given you today that all not their heads and go, yeah, yeah, I get it. That's me. I do this. It doesn't have to be that way. And there are times when we do procrastinate, and somehow it just materializes, we get stuff down. But when you spend too much of your time in this, and this is really why I make this presentation, if you spend too much time avoiding things and not getting on with it, then ultimately you're playing a small game, and your life is not going to take off the way that you want it to. Because we all dream. Some of us may dream big, but dreams are simply dreams unless we take the actions around it. And that's a big one. Yeah, being disciplined, it's everything. Here's the thing about being fearless. Being fearless means that you can trust, that you can handle whatever comes your way. Now, if you trust yourself, and you can communicate that trust to other people, then you're going to be able to handle the circumstances that come your way. But when we don't trust ourselves, when we don't believe that we're capable, when we really get caught up in that sense of failure before we've even begun to try, then that lack of trust is what absolutely gets in the way. So learn how to trust that you can handle whatever comes your way. And as someone said in the chat, it's a mindset issue. And the fear, please, is real. But fear is a function of the stories that we tell ourselves.  And I like to say it this way, too. Are you going to be the author of your own life? Or do you want to live in someone else's epic novel? And when we're living in someone else's epic novel, we don't trust ourselves. We don't trust that we can handle whatever comes our way, no matter what the circumstances are. Yep, tackle the to-dos. What are some small steps we can take? Again, think back to what I said earlier. Think about that list of things that you want to do. Or think about your priorities.  Go clean your car. Take a hose to it. Clean the windows. You don't have to go clean the interior, but you might want to clean the outside so you can see a little bit more clearly. You want to clean the bathroom? Go clean the bathroom. It's not that hard.  Go for it. These tiny little steps are really what's going to make the difference. And when you start making a habit of taking these small steps, the bigger steps don't feel quite so bad. So if you feel overwhelmed, ask yourself the following questions. What is my priority today? Why is it a priority? Does it make me happy or satisfied? Is it an important step or responsibility? What can I delegate? Where am I distracted? What is unnecessary? Where am I being pressured? Is the pressure internal or external? What am I avoiding and why? And what am I afraid of? Let me go back to that list again. Okay, this is key to managing your procrastination. Number one, what is your priority today and why? I said this in an earlier slide and I'm saying it again. You start your day with what is my priority today and why. And then ask yourself, does this make me happy or satisfied? If I finish this, if you can have the vision of completing something, how are you going to feel around that? And is it important? Or is it simply just another responsibility that you feel like you have to do? And of course, what can you delegate? Because sometimes we feel like we have to do it all when in fact you don't. You just have to figure out who needs to take care of this beyond me. Where am I distracted? We've talked a lot about distractions during this conversation. And of course, what is unnecessary? Again, back to that list. There's a lot on your list that I guarantee you is not necessary. But you've made it necessary. And there's another excuse for why you can't get stuff done. Where are you being pressured? Now, you've touched upon that from outside sources. You can get it from your boss, you can get it from your family, you can get it in your relationship. You've got to be able to set your priorities again around what's going to work for you on that. And again, the pressure is internal or external. Where do you beat yourself up? There's a lot of that goes on, negative self-talk, the ways in which we raise the ugly voice internally. Or is it coming from the outside, as was mentioned in chat a few minutes ago? And of course, avoiding, why are you avoiding it? What is it that makes it so difficult? And of course, the fear comes up. Again, am I good enough? We've got a lot going on in the chat right now. I'm going to take a moment to take a look through this. Yes, you are getting a copy of this. I made a PDF of this presentation, so you'll have plenty of reminders about what you can do. Ice cream is actually good for you. I found that out, but in small doses, it makes a difference. And Martin's right. Why is it a priority? It's big. That's really it. And can we contact you for private counseling? You can definitely do that if that's something that works for you. The details are going to be in the end of the presentation here. I've really appreciated how you participate in this today. This has been great. And I really do appreciate all of you for thinking about how you can do this better. So let's look into how can we procrastinate creatively? What an idea. Creative procrastination helps you focus and lets your ideas mature. Margaret Atwood, who is a very famous novelist, said that she needs time for procrastination in order for her to let her ideas mature. And I think that's a wise thing to say. But again, you've got to be very clear on your reasoning behind it. Keep a journal for your ideas, but implement them as soon as possible. This is not a don't forget note. Let's think about that for a moment. We can all say don't forget, but the moment that you say don't forget, you forget. So keeping a journal of your ideas are the things that you want to do and then put a date beside it. But don't say don't forget because you will forget. That's just how it works. Identify those small steps that make the complex easy by identifying what you can do now today. What can I do today that would make a difference to tomorrow? I'm going to say that again. What can I do today that would make a difference to tomorrow? That comes back to setting a priority, isn't it? Remind yourself why the thing you've been putting off is important and how life will be better once done. How will you feel when you get the stuff done that you've been procrastinating on, what you've been avoiding, the ways in which you have been finding all kinds of other ways to distract yourself? How will you feel? Wouldn't you be proud of yourself? I believe you will be. And of course figuring out how much time is available and spread out the tasks because when we look at it and we go oh those six hours of my time, well what about if we just take it half an hour at a time or even 15 minutes at a time? And we keep moving consistently forward with what needs to be done. And when you're clear on your steps, when you know what your priorities are, don't hesitate. Go full speed ahead and avoid the distractions. So what do you think of being creatively procrastinating? Tell me, a motivation cup? Maybe you should put a dollar in there every time you do something that's good for you. Then you can save money at the same time. We are in financial month with the San Francisco Public Library, creating a spreadsheet for more projects. Okay, I would suggest that if all you're going to do is create a spreadsheet for project after project after project, you'll end up getting nowhere. Is procrastination related to mental health? Only in so far as you think of yourself as not being capable, that's how it relates to mental health. And the amount of stress that you put on yourself in order to handle the things that you say you want to do and don't do. Yeah, and create a list of things that you need to do. And don't tell yourself not to forget it. People with ADHD procrastinate more, I'm told. Well, I have to tell you, I'm an ADD person. I don't have the H part. And it just, it's simply about, again, back to those six things that I told you, you got to get yourself back on track with that. And yes, I can be distracted, but I've learned how to stay organized, and I've learned how to focus on what's important to me, what my priorities are. And procrastination does create anxiety. There's no question about it. I have a whole program on anxiety and stress, and how we can handle it better. Because the mindset of procrastination is what creates the stress and anxiety. I know I should be doing this, but I'm not doing this. And if I don't do this, well, I'm going to get into trouble. And that is like the cycle that goes on in the head. So, you know, here we are. You want to get out of this cycle? You want to get off the hamster wheel? Start taking and identifying those small steps so you can start to keep moving forward. All right. I think I have covered it for today, and I want to hear from you. What's your biggest takeaway from today? What are you going to do tomorrow? Let me ask a different question. What are you going to do tomorrow? I'm glad it worked for you, Ann. I love it. So, Alex, you're going to clean your desk tomorrow. You're going to make it happen. And segment your schedule so that you can dive into those two projects. I love it. And definitely believe in yourself, Estefania. And clean the bathroom after this. Yes, let's make it happen, Ann. Does procrastination relate to imposter syndrome?  It's all about self-doubt. Yeah, it's all related one way or another, definitely. All right. Well, I am delighted. Schedule a reward for yourself if you get your tasks done. Terrific advice. Find something that gives you pleasure. And thank you, Estefania, for participating as you did. I'm glad that this was helpful. And Amalinda, go forward and do that school enrollment. Superb. I'm going to come back into the room now. Thank you. This has been wonderful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for being here and joining me today. It has been my pleasure to present this material. And if it makes any difference in your life, that makes me happy.  And if you're interested next month, what are we going to be talking about next month? I've forgotten. Oh, are you living life on purpose? Excellent. We're going to talk about setting a vision and how we can be clear on setting a clear idea of where we go, what our values are, and what does living life on purpose actually look like? So I hope you can come back and join me for that. Well, thank you so much, Jacqueline. And thanks to all of you for joining us today. We appreciate that you were here and look forward to you at the next, to seeing you at the next program. All right. Good night, everyone.


My name is K-Buck, CEO of the Coalition to Abolish Slavery and Trafficking. And I'm Ima Matu, the survival leadership program coordinator at CAST. So CAST is a direct service provider that works with survivors of trafficking of all kinds, all over the county of Los Angeles. They are survivors of both labor trafficking and sex trafficking. And what we do is we provide this continuum of care that focuses a lot on access to health care. And it's really through our partnership with Kaiser Permanente that we're able to provide not just training of health practitioners to be able to identify survivors when they see them, but to ensure that survivors are getting the best care possible and getting all of their health care and wellness needs met. Our model is really focused on services that are survivor centered and trauma informed. Our clients have a great deal of trauma when they escape traffickers, when they escape modern slavery and come to us for help. And so consequently our services ensure that we're addressing the trauma so that they can rebuild their lives and reintegrate back into the community as healthy community members. And as a person who are being affected by the issue of human trafficking and witnessed the CAST services that provided, I could speak on the services that I have received through CAST and how CAST has been supporting the well-being and continuing services for survivors from the beginning when clients or survivors call our hotline and place into the shelter and work with CAST manager very intensively, very comprehensive. It's amazing. I'm just one of the examples that CAST has helped me and CAST has been helping like hundreds and hundreds of survivors that are impacted by the issue of human trafficking. You know, Eva and I want to thank Kaiser Permanente for supporting our programs and at an even greater level helping us educate the community about human trafficking as it's a health issue. It's not just a criminal justice issue. It's a human rights issue that has a lot to do with survivors having access to quality care to become whole again. So on behalf of all of the survivors that we serve here at CAST, we want to thank Kaiser Permanente for being such a great partner in health.


This study suggests that experiencing early life trauma such as parental death or separation can have long-term effects on immune function in later life. Specifically, individuals who experienced this type of trauma in childhood had lower levels of certain immunoglobulins and cytokines, which are markers of immunity. Additionally, these effects were seen across different racial slash ethnic groups, suggesting that this effect is not limited to one particular group. This article was authored by Gracie Noppert, Kate A. Ducheney, Rebecca Stebbins, and others.


hi everyone welcome back to my channel and welcome to another video i'm really sorry about the back clip behind me there's this really bright light up here but without it on it's way too dark so i do apologize for how bright and white it is behind me i thought today we would just film a very chatty very real honest video um it's gonna be a q&a slash you know the trend like answering questions i've been avoiding that video i feel like a lot has changed in my life recently and i haven't really updated you guys on it so i asked for questions on my instagram and i'm just gonna answer them very honestly a lot of the questions were about the same kind of thing okay let's start with what do you like best about yourself and what would you change am i gonna talk about personalities or like looks i think in terms of like personality i think i'm very what i don't think i know i'm very selfless and i know i definitely put other people before myself sometimes that can definitely be a flaw but i think that's a good quality i don't think i'd change that what i would change well first i'd have naturally blonde hair so i didn't have to have to get it dyed i'd also have boobs so that i don't have to get a boob job and lips i don't have to get lip fillers personality wise i just say i wish i was more focused i just procrastinate so much it's so annoying so maybe that what made you pick a uni nearer to home so if you don't know i go to raw holloway university of london not really in london it's it's near it's in sorry if you know the geography of the uk obviously compared to like the universities i was looking at before like leeds in manchester it's a lot closer to where my parents live in london there were a few reasons for that some of them were good reasons some of them weren't good reasons i mean one of them was the fact that my boyfriend lived in london i'm not gonna lie that was definitely one of the reasons a bit awkward now i'll get onto that in a minute but i also really really wanted a campus uni i didn't want to go to a uni like say like one of the actual london unis because everyone always just said how much more i guess inclusive a campus uni feels like it's a lot easier to make friends and you don't feel as isolated also my course was one of the main reasons because i was i wanted to do marketing a lot of the russell group unis i don't know if it's because of their russell group status but like a lot of them that did marketing it was very like old-fashioned in terms of the content of the courses and like the modules that you can pick whereas the the course here has a lot more on the side of social media and digital marketing and stuff like that so that is also the reason that i pick this uni and i'm very happy that i did i have no regrets a life at home or life at uni interesting question there's a lot of questions about uni i'm gonna get into the deeper ones a bit later i don't know i've only been here for a month now i enjoy the fact that i have a lot to do here like having full time i mean i say full time uni half of our uni is in person and half of it's online so it's kind of and then also doing youtube at the same time and obviously living with your friends and so you socialize quite a lot i like that my life's a lot busier now than when i was at home because if you didn't know the second half of my gap year i wasn't really doing anything because i lost my job from covid and i couldn't go traveling because of covid so i was a bit lost with what i was doing with myself but obviously like living at home i get my laundry done for me i get cooked for get my washing up done with a dishwasher i'm gonna have a dishwasher here opinions on the wavehouse i think it's sick they've done amazingly i'm very proud of them and realistically people that are hating are just jealous so take it as a compliment that's what i always say you like meeting new people and how is youtube going for you i don't know if i like meeting new people once i've got to know them i love it if that makes sense but i'm so nervous before i meet someone you like coming to uni i was terrified about meeting everyone and like having to make new friends because i haven't really had to do that for a while obviously until now like i made friends in year seven at school and i've kind of almost pretty much had the same like best friends since then but it was fine i've made some lovely friends i think the process of like getting to know someone is really interesting and how's youtube going good i'm actually really motivated with it right now which is surprising i think because i've had like because i've just started uni i've got so much more content to like make and this is the kind of content that i enjoy making whereas i was a bit stuck in my gap here as to what to film but yeah i'm enjoying it right now see how long it lasts what do you do for a living i don't have a job i'm a student full time are you happy with where you are at in life right now good question in a lot of aspects yes as i was just saying with like moving to uni i'm really happy that i feel like my life's actually moving forward right now and it's definitely got me more excited for like life again if that makes sense because this is really getting a bit deep obviously not everyone's happy all the time and i don't want to get upset but in the big picture i'm good are you homesick no i actually really am not homesick i've been here for a month as i said and i don't know if i've ever been away from my family that long before probably the max i've been away would have been like two weeks on holiday like with my friends or something i don't feel homesick at all sorry mom and dad have been watching this but i am going home next weekend to see them and i'm also going to see my other friend for her birthday who is at uni in oxford um so that'll be really nice maybe i'll feel more homesick after i've been home everyone always says don't go home too early when you first start uni because it makes it worse so i'll update you after i've been home but yeah right now i'm fine did you feel out of place starting uni a year later than most people i'm on a gap here at the moment so if you didn't know i've mentioned my gap you're like three times this video already so hopefully you've caught on by now but i'm 19 i'm about to turn 20 in three months i do feel old in that sense and like when i turn 20 i'm gonna feel really old because there's gonna be people here who are still 18 but i feel like because we're all at the same kind of stage in life which is first year of uni and like everyone's had to leave home and make new friends and all of this so i don't like i haven't ever felt the age gap i haven't felt out of place at all i can't really can't tell the age gaps between me and my friends i think you'll be fine enjoy your gap here i'm very jealous do you really want to be at uni i really do want to be at uni i think i mean the covid situation made it pretty rubbish but i'm not gonna drop out i think i'm not gonna drop out i'm gonna manifest it i'm not dropping out i'm not dropping out are you still friends with kate or yes of course i'm friends with kate i haven't seen her in a long time but yeah obviously we've both just been very busy she's just become a tick tock sensation and i've moved to uni so i haven't seen her recently but we are definitely still friends do not worry okay right i'm just gonna i'm just gonna start talking about this now because there are like a hundred questions i'm just gonna put some on screen basically saying are you single did you break up with your boyfriend how did you get over a breakup what's the reason your last relationship ended yeah also a lot of you uh knew who he was um i don't really know how you managed to figure that out because literally none of our relationship was put online so congratulations and good stalking skills you've also all managed to find out that we broke up probably because of my tiktoks if you don't follow me on tiktok go follow me because that's why i post all my emotional content uh if you ever want to know what's going on in my life i'll probably post tiktok about it anyways yes me and my boyfriend have broken up me and my ex he broke up with me about just over a month ago now no maybe more like six weeks ago now time flies quick when you're having fun yeah none of the details of our relationship were online so i really need to say anything but the fact that i've got more than half of my questions about this i feel like i couldn't just ignore it and obviously the tiktok content people are gonna want to know what's going on i'm not gonna say too much obviously it's his business as well a lot of the questions were asking how i've gotten over it i wouldn't say i'm completely over it i definitely have moments where it hits me and then moments where i feel completely fine i don't know how long it's gonna take i'm doing okay i don't know a lot better than i was doing six weeks ago yeah a lot has happened in the last six weeks so i'm feeling very different from when it first happened to how i feel about the whole situation now it's very confusing i don't have like a set answer for you like it wasn't like we broke up because i was moving to uni or because he cheated on me like it wasn't any of that i just hope that in the long run it will be the best for both of us obviously i didn't plan on ever breaking up but when it first happened i knew i was gonna be upset but i don't think i quite realized how much power he had over my emotions if that makes sense like even now just thinking about it it's gonna make me cry there's definitely been times since it happened where i've really really missed him but also just missed like that feeling of comfort like you'll know when you're if you're if you're in a relationship or you've ever been in a relationship but like being with them just feels like everything feels safe and comfortable and like happy i think that's what i miss the most for fuck's sake but everything happens for a reason and i need to keep telling myself that because there's bigger and better things coming not necessarily relationships because i do not want one of those right now but just in life in general i'm gonna follow that tiktok sound that's like go get that degree go focus on me anyways point is you don't need a man and you have to be your own happiness you can't love someone else more than you love yourself and that's the lesson that i'm learning anyways i hope that cleared that up i can answer some more questions now have you ever considered dropping out of uni and pursuing youtube full time i wish i could do this i would absolutely love to do youtube full time for a bit i don't think i could do it as like a long-term career i don't even know if youtube could be a long-term career for anyone but i really want to do social media marketing and like that is why i'm here at uni to get eventually into that field and get a job in that field so yes i would like to do youtube full time but also i wouldn't drop out of uni to do it so i'd always want to have my degree in my back pocket if that makes sense so that i could use that if i needed to or when i wanted to obviously right now i'm in no position to be doing youtube full time at all i just about managed to get one video out a week someone asked how much i make from youtube uh genuinely from like adverts ads that you see on my videos a hundred and something pounds a month it ranges obviously but like from a hundred to two hundred pounds a month is like average and then sponsorships but i barely do any of those like realistically and so it's not an income at all it's like i could probably make more money if i went scarring the streets for people's loss change would i get a nipple piercing maybe if i had a boob job first what's your ultimate life goal to feel content and happy i want to be financially stable i don't care about being ridiculously rich but i want enough money so that i never have to worry about like obviously i don't ever want to have to worry about paying bills and stuff like that but i also want to be able to just treat myself and treat my friends and family whenever i want to like i'd love to be able to just be like i think we all just need to go for a weekend like a spa weekend i want a job i actually genuinely enjoy so that it doesn't feel like work because they always say if you enjoy your job then you never work a day in your life i think that's the same and just to be surrounded by amazing people who genuinely care for me and to have a really nice house and a really nice car and really cute kids at one point in life because i really want children i guess that sums it up okay last question is do you ever feel like you have to live up to certain expectations or standards i don't know if you mean online or in my life in real life definitely when i was at school i mean i went to a very very academic private school in london and i know it might not have felt like it to a lot of people there because it was so academic they had very high expectations for what you had to get like me even getting one a in my gcsc's i was disappointed like the school had made me feel like that wasn't good enough which is ridiculous a lot of my friends were very very clever and so obviously they weren't pressuring me but just i was just like putting the pressure on myself to do as good as them online beauty standards a hundred percent oh my god i could talk about that for hours and hours and hours but i think i'm getting better i'm gonna end this video here got a bit a little bit emotional i need to go see my friends and have a hug i hope you guys enjoyed this video thank you so much for sending questions in if you don't follow me on instagram then go follow me that's why i always ask for like any questions assumptions video ideas whatever i need for my videos it will always be on there so go follow me if you want to be involved give a big thumbs up if you enjoyed it subscribe if you aren't already because it's free and it would really be a very nice thing to do and i'll see you in my next video bye