What we're about to do is because of all of you. Look, I'm going to be honest with you, we never thought we would do this again. These are some wheels. Some industrial wheels. Ooh, it's like at nine pounds. This project has proven to be so challenging. It broke. Like a side, it sticks to your head. After reading all of your comments, we feel we have the courage to try again. Chances are we're going to fail. But that's okay. We've been building our cabin for over a year. We're attempting to drywall ourselves once again after failing miserably our first time. This is what everyone told us not to tape in that. This is really not looking good. This roof is like no other. It is like these trusses. It's going to be hard. We've decided to tackle it all by... Through all the amazing advice and tips, what stood out to us the most was your belief in us to succeed. I don't have that in myself really right now. But y'all have a lot of belief in us. Just a little bit. We will dance when it's done. I'm all ready to dance. All right, looks like the police busted my party. What we need to do is we need to measure every 16 down the trusses. That way they are... The drywall won't fall off the roof. Really, is why we're doing it. I've marked that all out. However, we need the exact measurement of how long it is. That way we can start strapping the roof. Let me tell you about my best friend. It's a powerful nail gun and I love it so much. I love our scaffolding. What would we do without it?  Time for the very necessary step of strapping the ceiling. Moms are back drywalling. We all know how this goes. We have been on a mission to give this cabin new life. Once abandoned, now fitted with new insulation, walls and an indoor bathroom. We are getting closer to completion. We never thought we'd ever try drywall again, but here we are. And not surprisingly, we are already overwhelmed. Hi, thanks, Brayfall. Look at this. We have to go straight. We have to work on the house here. You're already getting defeated? I'm just frustrated. Why? It's not fun. You're on strapping. I hope you realize this is the easiest part. Yeah. In all honesty, though, putting up the strapping in between these little tiny triangles on the trusses is pretty difficult. And if we're struggling putting up a one by three through the triangles, I can only imagine how difficult it is gonna be to getting the drywall up. Anytime anyone ever comes in the cabin and asks what we're doing with the ceiling, as soon as we tell them our vision, all they say is good luck that is gonna be hard. Does anyone else forget to look outside all day in the winter and then it becomes 520 at night? Then yes, this is all we've done since 520 is set up scaffolding and... That's why I'm frustrated. As we push through the struggle, we're making progress. So much I'm eating it for dinner. After spending the entire day on a simple task, we're not sure if we're just slow or maybe we're avoiding doing drywall at any cost. And it's because we didn't have our proper work shoes on. Sport mode, now we're ready for drywalling. Step two, we actually need more strapping. Sheets of drywall are four by eight. Did we think of that yesterday? No. This isn't even a regular roof. Like it's not even like it's flat or it's just a peak. Like we're trying to squeeze these little pieces in. What are we thinking? We tried to put it in a wall. No, we can't put it in the last stretch. This is going to be hard. If we cut the sheet in half, how do we all do that? Like what? I think the absolute hardest part of getting started right now is knowing that this is going to take forever to cross the finish line and we're fully prepared that it could take a long time. But I think that's the hardest part in getting started. And we want it to look good. We don't want it to look like trash. Yeah, I don't want it to look bad. I want to take our time with it. I already know it's gonna take a long time but I also just like don't know if we entirely know what the best way is to do it. So I feel like because we are doing it ourselves, it's a lot of up and down, back and forth and backtracking already. And we haven't even started putting the drywall up. We're setting our intentions today with drywall and with our health. AG1 is going to keep us on track and pump us up. Loving the view from up here. AG1 by Athletic Greens is designed to be uncomplicated. One scoop, some water, shake it, drink it and it covers your nutritional bases. Let's hope the drywall is as easy as AG1. I love Java. We're baffled. I'm starting to believe in us. This makes zero sense.  I can't even hang it. So no matter what you eat, your body is receiving high quality nutrients every day. It's a powerful blend of nine health products, a multivitamin, superfoods, adaptogens, probiotics and more. This time of year with the lack of sun and all the comfort foods that I'm indulging in, when I get my AG1 in my hand, I truly feel so good. My body thanks me every time it energizes me and it makes my gut feel amazing. There's so many great benefits that I physically feel each day. And Jasmine wants you all to know it makes her poops great. Oh my God! Drink AG1, get five free travel packs and a year supply of a vitamin D immune supporting dropper with your first purchase. Click the link in our description of this video. Thank you AG1 for sponsoring this week's video. So because we are cutting the drywall as you can't fit sheets up there, that means we are losing our factory edge.  The tiniest slope you've ever seen. We don't have that luxury of keeping the factory edge, which means taping and mudding is only going to be harder. How do you feel about that? Okay, your face does it all.  Crystal has been crusty crystal all day today. She doesn't want a drywall, but I want a drywall and all of you want us to drywall. So we're drywalling. Anywho, we just put up the first piece of drywall. It's not even screwed in yet. And Crystal goes, it's going to look good. Are you happy now? Yeah, I think I am. Well, I'm happy now. It doesn't mean it's going to stay to be honest. I have a hard, funny feeling that this is beginner's luck. Oh, my fingies off to about start. First screw, there comes a week of sore arms. Are you having fun? I am having fun now, actually. I wanted to share with you all that within 10 minutes my mood has completely turned upside down and I'm feeling much more excited and happy because the first piece went up so well. I'm actually, I'm starting to believe in us. Actually, I don't mind at all. Oh, brother, so hot and cold as it. That looks really good, eh? Yeah, go wash. Go wash. Go wash. New sheets, baby. Oh my God, that looks good. Let's keep going. Proud. Proud. Mind you though, this is just the hanging the drywall part. What? This is not taping and mudding. A tough piece comes. Coffee break. I don't know if you can feel this, but we are up and down. Like one minute on cloud nine, the next minute, just don't want to do it. This is not any coffee break. This is the coffee break that is going to change everything. As it's time to get the entire right side up. I'm jazzed. I'm jazzed up. I'm jazzed up. You ready, girl? Can you write this down? 11 and a half and 10 and a quarter. Jipsum. Jipsum. Oh yeah, no. I cheated. Oh my goodness, I love this. Oh, we might need to cut more out. It doesn't fit. It doesn't fit. Too big. I'm telling you, it's massive. I actually think that it's stuck right there. Okay, but why is it so short then? I think we have to cut that down and then this would fit better. There's not enough space for this piece of drywall to go in. How come there is on every other one? That is not the problem. This tricky piece makes zero sense. Or baffled. Baffled. This sheet must be wrong. Like this must not be something cut wrong on the sheet. I told you this whole time. I said the bottom will grab. Okay, take it down. Let's cut it again. Like a millimeter. What? This makes zero sense. Good. We did it. Look everyone. One full row. We are now on step two. As Jay Lett said, you really should stagger those seams while doing drywall. Thank you so much. And to the 20 million other comments that told us about our seams. We are now doing it right. What do you want to say to the vlog? Is he? That's not tweet. She's an ASMR kind of girl. Next measurement. 22 in between. In between, right? I honestly don't think I could build a cabin without you. I don't think I could build a U either. Okay, I'm going to give it over to your side.  I'm sorry. Cut again. Yay! I was sweating. I was so mad like five minutes ago because it was just one thing after another. I think you have to make these mistakes in order to learn how to do it because you were telling me gentle on the side of that thing. And I was like, it's not going to break. Sure not. It broke. I need to show you why that was so challenging. So as you can see, we actually cut out the drywall. Out of the trash. Yeah. Not just once, but twice. You stayed very optimistic. Yeah, you were crusty, freaking crystal in capital letters. Crustle! Crustle, yeah. Not even crusty crystal. That sounds nice. You were crusty. Crustle was out. But we actually did it. Look at this roof. It's half drywalled. And I'm again, should have shown you how mad I was. But again, I'm feeling optimistic that we can do it. When crystal is crustal, she gets very quiet. That's why she doesn't talk to the camera until I go, what's wrong? What's wrong? That's why she doesn't talk.  It's so nice. Guess what? We gotta do it again. I know, and again. Again, and again. And it's 818. Now that all the nuggets of wisdom were found and eaten, we feel like we're getting the hang of this. And we're even having fun.  Sheep by sheet, another row complete. Yeah. Wow, we're getting good. Woo! Good job, Wiggy. You're too, Wiggy. Looks pretty good, eh? Yeah, I love it. I like just staring at it. Just wait till it's like finished too. It's gonna look phenomenal. I'm just imagining every little detail. Like the trim and the dresses. It's just like such a good decision. I'm really happy we're doing it ourselves. We're doing our best. It's just gonna be cool in the end to say that we're doing it, you know? We built it all. We built it in Crocs. Crocs with headlights. Good night, y'all. Night, y'all. Look at Crystal right now. She has no idea about you with her. Are you on your charging station? Charging. This is the warmest and the strongest the sun has felt since the fall. This is the best way to wake up. It is sad. She's strong. Must be all that dry while you're lifting lately. Day three. Losing track of our days. I love jello. It's actually fun. It just takes forever. Doing something for the second time is always so much fun because you realize how much you've learned. Already, we have pretty much all the screws all covered. Crystal's already measuring. Instead of trying to figure out what the next step is, you already know the next step and it just becomes that much easier. And that much more fun. Does it fit this way? Not sure if this fits. Push, Crystal. Oh my gosh, this is silly. You might be frustrated, but you do look really cool right now with it. What's the verdict? We thought it was gonna get easier as we got up here, because it looks like there's a lot more space, but there's definitely not. So we can't really get the jar all up and cut it into smaller pieces maybe. I don't really know. More pieces mean more mudding and taping. It's gonna take forever with little pieces. That's what people do when they wanna expose their trusses or are we the only ones that wanna expose trusses like this? You got it? No, no, that's my mark. It's a little bracket. What? What's going on?  Do you not know how to measure anymore? I don't know what happened. Second time in a row? All right, we've tried to put two pieces up. We're going on our third now because I'm not doing a good job measuring. Oh my gosh. I was just looking to get someone to drywall the living room of my house. Oh, I'm sorry, we don't do that. Try again later. Looks like they quit their job too, because it's awful. You can leave a brief message. I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Are you a drywaller? I was just wondering, what's your availability like right now? Pretty poor. I would say Colorado. It's Jasmine calling. I'm looking to get my roof. Hello? Hi, do you drywall? Yes, we do. I tried to attempt this myself and I failed. I'm failing miserably. So, whenever you have availability, I am there. And we just like it from there. Amazing, thank you so much. That is hopeful. We haven't even hung a sheet today. Like we literally haven't hung one, freaking sheet. Did you realize that we haven't hung one sheet? I'm annoyed. Like, I don't want to do this. Seems like so silly, like a waste of time. I actually feel so defeated right now.  Like, what the? Availability is gonna be within like two months or a month by the way. I know. Trying to drywall, like probably like skill level 100 right now, like 15 feet in the air, on a staging, around the trusses. Like it's literally three o'clock by the way. I just have a hard time giving up. Yeah, same. You wanna keep going? After a wildly up and down few days, we decided to step away from the job. Refueling with sun and supper to attempt to try this yet again. Well, it's bad. Sometimes it's important just to walk away from a job when it is just getting too frustrating as your mind clearly isn't in it. Whee! Don't wanna miss it. Let's do it again, girl. We're already in it. I need to see the cover of me. I see it. You can do it. I got it. 25 center. We're doing it. We're looking good. Looking pretty good. One more piece and then we're done up here. Baby, we got that. We actually got a lot done. I know. Brown. Day four of drywalling. And today is the day that we've been looking forward to oh so much. Taping and mudding. Once again, not our strong suit. As you all know, we failed miserably doing this last time. So let's give it our best shot. We should probably start the fire, eh? The fire's already going. I think it just needs a little extra love. Are you still hungry? Second breakfast? How about brunch? Hey mom, what are you doing? Oh, not much. We're just hanging out. Later, I'm gonna do some taping and some mudding. The windows are looking pretty dirty, eh? We should just give them a clean. There's at least seven more windows too. You should do them all. Oh, for sure. While you're at it. Oh yeah, I'll get them all done. Don't worry. Add some water, we're told. Apparently it makes the taping. Oh yeah, look at it, so much more smooth. Half the comments told us to use mesh tape. Half the comments told us to use the paper tape. I still am confused after doing a lot of research. But I think paper is the winner, right? I guess, yeah. The majority of people said this, but then a lot of people said this. And then Google also says that you shouldn't use this. Well, they didn't say you shouldn't. It just says paper may be easier. Paper's definitely not easier. Also, you have to make sure you're using the right product with that. I think they just said that so they can sell more of the product. Okay. 100%. Does the top look like it has enough that it's going to adhere? Yes, Crystal. I'm just taking a look back here when the bottom looks dirty. There's a heavy drop of water. I think that looks good. Something else we learned from all of you. You said, I have never seen a drywaller cut tape with scissors. Well, news flash, I'm not a drywaller. But thank you for teaching me something new. There are tips and tricks. We have another room to do, like ceiling. Please let us know because we will listen. Well, well, well. I would say Jasmine drywall canning is a drywaller. I mean, it hasn't set in or anything yet, but I would say it's a 10 of 10 so far. Hopefully I'm not speaking too soon, but no, it's looking really good. Good job, babe. Call me. Call. I'll come care of all your heads. She's doing a really good job. Good job, babe. I will be very cheap on labor, but I will take 10 hours, so it will still be expensive. I literally just did that seam in two swipes. Bro. I think I'm getting good. You all had so much belief in us, all those comments when you paused it saying that we could do it. And I think all we needed was a little bit of belief in ourselves. Thanks for filling me back up, because I think I'm good now. It looks so good. Like, I think it's going well. You don't need to think. Like, that looks good. I also love the feeling of failing, and then trying again, like a week later. And getting it. And getting it. It's such a good feeling. I don't really know how to describe the feeling. It just feels like, yeah. That's all the words I got, though. Mudding and taping is looking easier than ever before. Look at this. It's looking good. Nice. This is lost. Weeks ago, we felt like absolute amateurs. Now we are professional drivers. They're only taping and mudding. I couldn't do the pieces without you. If you're a drywaller, like, be honest. I want to know how long this would have actually taken you. So this took us, Nick, I would say three. We had a late start. Plus filming. So maybe two and a half. Two and a half. Two and a half. I want to know how long this would take someone. That is a profession. Not us.  Let me know. I'm such a good drywaller. I'm having lunch on time. Ramen. Can you believe we did it? What a wild time. I'm so proud of us, Jazzy. It looks so good. After a week of ups and downs, we finally did it. Done. That's wild. Woo! I know you think that was quick, but you were up there for hours, by the way. Really? Yeah. Well, I guess I was having fun. I'm proud. You should be proud. Are you proud? I'm proud of you. If you find yourself in a situation where you don't believe in yourself, just remember, we believe in you. And with your encouragement and kind words, we felt the motivation to try again. We couldn't have done this without y'all. Woo! Woo!


Chinese medicine has all these funny diagnostic terms like spleen chi deficiency or liver chi stagnation or kidney chi deficiency. And I think these are very useful terms to understand because they describe certain patterns that have been observed for thousands of years. And I think a forte of Chinese medicine is that we look at things and symptoms in terms of their patterns and that individual symptoms. So in this video, I thought I would share five symptoms of what we call liver chi stagnation. Hey guys, Dr. Alex Hain, Doctor of Chinese Medicine and licensed acupuncturist. So before we jump into these five signs, there are two very important links right below this video. The first is if you'd like to become a patient of mine locally in Los Angeles or virtually via telemedicine, you can contact my private practice right below this video. And the second is for a free guide, which is five daily rituals that can potentially help you add years to your life with Chinese medicine. Now the liver in Chinese medicine is not always associated with the physical liver of anatomy or necessarily biomedicine. Of course, there are some times where the person has actually something that's affecting the physical liver that's measurable like liver enzymes are spiking. But in general, when we're talking about these gradations and stages of symptoms and disease, when we talk about, for example, liver chi stagnation, as we are here today, it doesn't mean there's something measurably wrong with the liver or even really anything wrong with a liver yet. So when someone says I have my acupuncture said I have liver cheese stagnation, but I did all my blood work and I did all my labs, my PCP says they look fine. Is there something wrong? So the answer is both yes and no. Yes, because this is a preclinical or a subclinical as the term is a subclinical indicator that something is going wrong from our perspective in Chinese medicine. It doesn't mean you need to run and go get labs done or see your PCP. It just means there's a certain tendency that pathology is building and these are what some of those signs look like. So when we talk about liver cheese stagnation, the liver is one of those organs associated with the emotion of anger or agitation. We also associated with the regulation of women's menses in addition to other organs as well can be related to many other things like digestive problems, indigestion, reflux, alternating bowels, can be related to headaches, related to PMS symptoms. So the liver plays a very important role, often with other organs from our perspective. But here are five signs of what we call liver cheese stagnation. And I think this is a very useful concept to understand because it's often subclinical. So you can experience these on a stressful day, for example. So the first one maybe is just emotional, right?  You feel kind of pressurized area in your ribs, you feel fullness, maybe a little bit of attention headache coming on. So one of the first signs is a feeling of emotional stuffiness or heaviness in the chest, agitation or feeling of stuckness. Like things are not quite smoothly flowing as they should be. The second sign is digestion. Now for this pattern, I like to think of it as epigastric and abdominal distention. Sometimes indigestion, sometimes reflux and burping, sometimes pain, abdominal pain, sometimes a lot of gas coming up, and sometimes variable bowel movements. So sometimes people say my stools range from soft to hard, sometimes even in the same bowel movement. That's often one of our signs. The third is more menstrual for women, breast tenderness, irregular menses, PMS signs before the cycle. These can be an indicator that something's going on with the liver from a Chinese medicine perspective. And these are obviously very, very common. The fourth is related to let's just call it neurological. For example, headaches are very commonly related to this headaches and sometimes some kinds of migraines. So headaches that move around, especially the lateral sides of the head like that and migraines for some people, not all people can be this liver pattern in particular. And finally, just another category of feeling agitated a lot, feeling like you have that lump in your throat. If you ever feel like you're about to cry, but it just doesn't come up or come out, that can be related to this.  That can be a sign of liver cheese stagnation. So I think this concept is useful and interesting because it falls into that category of what is not yet necessarily measurable from a biomedical perspective, but is beginning to be pathological. So whether it is the stressful day or the changes in your menstrual cycle or alternating bowel pattern or a little bit of that, those tension headaches coming up. It's useful to see this because I like that's called liver cheese stagnation, almost like it's a bit more ethereal and not quite as tangible or material yet. So at this point, it's just cheese stagnation. Maybe it's just, maybe we could say it's synonymous with emotional stagnation in some cases. And so if the emotion passes or the person goes and works out or they go do something fun that night or they get a good night of sleep, then that cheese stagnation can move. We obviously do that with acupuncture and Chinese formulas, but there are plenty of lifestyle practices that will do the same thing. But recognizing that, hey, maybe I'm having a rough day or a rough week, and I'm experiencing some of these symptoms of what we call cheese stagnation. And it isn't structural or measurable yet, but it may be in six months or a year. And so I can recognize that while it's a baby, while it's immaterial, while it's just physiological, I can nip it in the bud and take care of it. So that is some of the common signs of liver cheese stagnation. That's what I have for you today, guys. Before we go, don't forget to check out those links right below this video, and I have two other related videos for you there.


From its inception, the United States has been a laboratory for racism and sexism and hatred administered by the incumbent few generated animosity and thrust thrust thrust Our economic strength our military power and most of all seizing goods from from others this system Built upon the foundation of private property Harnesses insult in every word gesture action And if you teach your children and others how to hate They will learn to be what I call a point of life


So if you hear this red flag from a man, there's a good chance he'll break your heart. And we're gonna actually give you several different phrases that men say that could actually be a precursor for them actually creating their exit clause. I think some men who are either rather manipulative or they're rather unconscious set up their exit clause. In other words, their escape plan by actually dropping seeds right from the beginning. And that way they can always come back and say, see, I told you so kind of thing. Okay, now what I'm about to share is ridiculously obvious. And yet it's sadly, I witness women habitually neglect this one particular red flag. And then there's a series of red flags that kind of go with this. And so we're gonna dive into this and we're gonna give you a little variance with this within this as well. So the most significant red flag is when a man says, I'm not looking for anything serious. Now, the challenge with that is you might not also be looking for anything serious as well. So if two people aren't looking for something serious and they engage in some activity together, meaning getting to know one another, which includes both emotional connection as well as physical connection, what oftentimes happens is one person, typically the woman gets attached to the other person and it can actually set you up for heartbreak later on down the road. So if you are someone looking for a serious relationship and they say, I'm not looking for anything serious, well, I guess it begs the question, what does that mean I'm not looking for anything serious? So I invite you to even ask, what does that mean? So if it's not serious, then it's casual, then the question then becomes what kind of relationship are you looking for? What kind of relationship are you looking for? If you're seeking a casual relationship, well, let's put that in a bucket for a moment. Are you seeking friends with benefits? Let's put that in a bucket for a moment. Are you seeking a situation ship? Let's put that in a bucket for a moment.  That's another new phrase that's out there. It's very popular for the polyamorous groups, ethical non monogamy. See, serious to me represents a desire to go from a dating to not, so let's look at this for a second. What's the purpose of dating? Like, well, Jonathan, it's about having a good time and you get to know each other and have a good time. No, the purpose of dating is a vetting process to decide if you want to enter into a relationship with this person. And then what's the purpose of a relationship? Like, what's the purpose of it? Like, why do people do this? Well, I believe if you don't have the intention of getting to a serious place and then this begs the question, what is serious? Then you're actually going into the dating dynamic, the relationship dynamic with no direction. Let's just say, for example, you lived in Los Angeles and you're driving to New York City, okay?  Does anyone remember Thomas Brothers guide? And you have no map question, you have no Google maps, you have no ways, you have no navigation system. How are you gonna get there? Are you just gonna go, hmm, I'll just drive towards the rising sun? Well, yeah, but you can end up in a lot of different places and that's what's happening today is most of you don't have a sense of direction on what you want. So it's very easy to fall into the trap of those that are seeking non-serious because they're giving you attention in that moment.  So then you have to decide what is serious? Is serious getting married at some point? Is serious living together? Is it sharing expenses in life? What is serious? And for each one of you, that might have a different answer to you for you, excuse me. When a man says I'm not looking for anything serious, I would want to know what's the resistance? What's the fear to serious? So now we're gonna take this question or this statement and we're gonna take it a bit deeper. What is the resistance or fear? And this is where you can actually find out more and actually uncover if it's really a situation, if it's just, okay, some people will say, I'm not looking for anything serious because they have no idea if they want something serious with you. They want something serious, but they don't know if you're that person. Some men will say, let's take it slow. Now, let me be clear. When you hear a man say, let's take it slow, but he was like a jackrabbit to get you in bed. So he got you in bed, you slept together. And then immediately after that, let's take it slow.  Bum, bum, bum, Jonathan, you said a dirty word. Just graphically describing biology here for a moment. So when a guy says take it slow after he was rushing to get you in bed, what that is really saying is, I don't know if I like you enough to emotionally invest in you. I wanna drag this out as far as possible. And by the way, when men take it slow, they can be searching with other women, they can be putting themselves out there in a variety of different ways. So just recognize that that's a big gigantic red flag as well. Now, here's the thing about some men who say I'm not looking for anything serious. It's an escape cause to say, look, I don't know if I like you enough, well enough to actually even tell you I want something serious. But what does happen to some men? Okay, some men that don't hate their ex-spouse that aren't pining for an ex-relationship, they've had good relationships after their divorce, for example, for those of us in midlife, there's a good chance you're divorced. They don't have professional issues going on. The ground underneath them is solid, they can pay their bills, they have a good relationship with their children, if they have children. See, these men are actually might say that initially because that's why it begs the question, what does that mean to you? And then you come back to what's the resistance? If the resistance or fear is they got burned badly, then chances are they haven't healed from their past relationship and that makes them very problematic to be in any future relationship. But I'm thinking, I went to a wedding just 10 months ago and he said in the beginning, I'm not looking for anything serious. And she progressed, she asked some deeper questions and then she investigate what that was is he was just simply saying, I don't know if I like you well enough to know, but I'm looking for a serious relationship. So what was interesting, he started off with a precursor, but when she dug a little bit, she uncovered where he was really at. Okay, fast forward, they dated for two years, they got engaged and got married roughly about eight months after that. He was ready, the timing was right for him because the ground underneath him was solid. See ladies, many of you find yourself in dynamics with men that I call spenders. If you're not familiar with my chart, I call them the three types of people actively dating. By the way, you can look here, this is not a fact, it's merely an opinion. I call them users, which are about 20% of the population. Those are the people seeking short-term game, the love bombers, the players, the gold diggers, the selfish people, the entitled people, they're only out for themselves in a good time. And then I have what I call grower and builders, it's about 20% of the population, they seek long-term commitment, they're emotionally grown up, they have their act together, they have good relationship skills, okay? But vast majority, 60% are what I call spenders. These are people that want companionship, connection, and sex, okay, companionship.  So your job, okay, so you have an 80% chance to end up with a user or spender. Now as you notice back in this, the arrow's pointing, there is arrows pointing towards the growers, right? Someone might be right at the cusp of going from a spender to a grower. And the key point to look for those men, because you're most likely gonna find someone in the 80% category is, is their life in shambles? Do they have any negativity towards a past relationship? Are they complainers? Do their actions not match their words? You have to be your own detective. You have to be your own detective. I'm sorry, but Jonathan, everybody tells me it should just be easy. By the way, why isn't it so easy? You shouldn't have to work at this stuff. Folks, the most important decision you are ever going to make in your life is the person you let into your life. That is by far, that is by far more important than becoming a doctor. That's even more important than having children. I'm sorry, this is just my opinion here. This is more important than the job you chose. The most important decision you're ever going to make in your life is your life partner.  I read on dating profiles, if there isn't chemistry, don't even bother kind of thing. And I'm like, yeah, chemistry is important. There's no doubt about that. Chemistry is important.  Yeah, chemistry's on the top. It's the first thing we see, but compatibility is about shared values, a shared vision, blendable lifestyles and emotional maturity. That's far more critically important. Now I wanna dive into one more red flag that can be a heartbreak for you. And that is those spenders who are stuck in the past or they have walls up. They are stuck in the past or have walls up. People are stuck in the past. They're still hung up on a past relationship. They talk about a past relationship incessantly. They talk about how they were, their previous partner was a narcissist. They were an abuser. They were an alcoholic. They were a user. All this negativity about a past relationship, okay? Or they have walls up and they are unwilling to dive deeper emotionally into the relationship. They're unwilling to dive deeper. They're fine with the surface, but they're unwilling to answer deeper questions. See, here's the bottom line, folks. The whole dating process, I said this in the beginning of the broadcast, is a vetting process. Your job is to assess whether or not they have the capacity to meet your needs. And I'm assuming if you're watching my channel, you have the desire to be partnered with someone. Whether you live together, you get married on a spiritual level or a legal level. You actually want partnership. Well, here's the bottom line, folks. Remember I come back to this relationship, iceberg? This emotional maturity right there, emotional maturity. These are humans that have the capacity that have good relationship skills. They have healed from their childhood wounds and adult traumas.  See, the problem is today is we are no longer dating for partnership. We're just dating for a good time. We're dating for entertainment. It's all about attraction and romance and not enough emphasis is spent on the pre-qualifying if they are actually a good fit for me. I'll share something personal with you in a few moments as well. And it saddens me because so many of you women, I'll be candid with you. Look it, I've got duct tape. Look at this. I'm pulling out some duct tape. Okay, duct tape. This is you women. You have duct tape over your mouth. You are unwilling to ask for your needs to be met. I may repeat that. You are unwilling to ask for your needs to be met.  You're afraid. You're afraid that if you speak up, he will leave you.   A Journey of Personal Development, Self-Help in Spiritual Work. There's a link below to get a copy of my book. Chapter one, speak your truth, do it with kindness. And chapter nine is if it's sincere and from the heart, you really can't say the wrong thing to the right person. Ladies, the duct tape you have over your mouth is the reason why you find yourself in circumstances that lead to heartbreak. If you are unwilling to dig a bit deeper, then you have your own near yourself to blame. Look, I get it. By the way, dating is scary. It is scary. We are meeting total strangers and we know nothing about them. This is why we have to spend more time doing due diligence beyond the physical and the romance. And so many of you are so hyper-focused on the romantic aspects of a relationship and not enough in the practical aspects of a relationship. And so I shoot these videos and I habitually repeat myself over and over and over and over again. So it sinks in because here's the thing, when a man leads with, I'm not looking for anything serious, can we have a casual? I don't wanna put labels on it. That's a man who doesn't know what he wants. And by the way, you all say to me, Jonathan, I want the man to be the leader of the relationship. Well, if he doesn't know what he wants, how can he lead? And by the way, I don't believe in a leader in a relationship. I cannot stand the rhetoric out there, leader of the relationship. Let me tell you, and I'm gonna be really firm right here. I believe in partnership. Two sovereign beings co-creating a relationship and not a leader that's one up, one down. And I know the red pill community espouses this. I know a lot of religious people are espoused this. You know, because it's biblical. I don't subscribe to that. I'm not your coach. If that's what you subscribe to, I believe in partnership where two sovereign beings get together and they co-create something together by speaking up, by talking, by digging more into the emotional aspects of the relationship. The reality is, is your partner should be the safe space place you should land. And you both equally should be in that space. It's not just you need to be safe. He needs to be safe too. Because you know what? We no longer live in an environment where we financially are, women in particular are no longer financially dependent upon men for survival. So the real value in the relationship is emotional intimacy. If you haven't read the book, Emotional Intimacy by Robert Masters, there's a link below to get a PDF of all the books I recommend. I highly recommend reading this. And if you're not familiar with your own emotions, I gotta tell you some, you ladies, you might vomit your feelings, but you're really vomiting a lot of just trauma. Learn the language of emotions, what your feelings are actually telling you by Carla McLaren. I highly recommend reading this book as well. I'll put that up one more time. The language of emotions. By the way, if you go back and rewind this if you wanna get this, and there's a link below to get all the books I recommend. Folks, one of the things I do as a coach, my whole area of expertise is teaching discernment. By the way, there's a link below to schedule a discovery call with me to see if working with a coach is right for you. My whole area of expertise is teaching you discernment. Discernment means figuring out fairly quickly is this person worth investing in?  Yeah, she said I had a broken picker and you've helped me fix my broken picker, but you really helped me figure out who I am as a person and what I really want. And that's what I brought to the table as well. Again, there's a link below to schedule a discovery call. See if working with a coach is right for you. Folks, when you hear things, let's take it slow. If you hear, I'm not looking for anything serious. If I only want casual, if they're unwilling to actually go deeper, if they are unwilling to answer deeper questions, if you ask the question, what's the resistance and they're not willing to go there, then save yourself heartbreak and cut it off sooner rather than later. Is this sinking in? Is this resonating? Please let me know if it is. Please post a comment below. I do my best to read them all in the first 24 hours. As always, if you liked this video, please hit that like button. Please share this video. Please subscribe to my channel and hit that notification bell so you can be notified of new videos as well. And then in the link below in the first comments, check out schedule a discovery call with me. Check out the books I recommend. Follow me on Instagram and all that good stuff. Okay. All right, those who know my format know. It's time for Q and A. If you have a question, write the word question in the chat box and then post your question there after. Or you can purchase a Super Sticker Super Chat. All the monies from the Super Sticker Super Chat goes to a scholarship fund in the name of my son, Connor Asley. That's a picture of him right there when he was eighth grade graduation. He's my son who passed away five and a half years ago. Fuck, five and a half years ago. And as honor, we donate to causes like the Hoffman Process and Insight Institute and also give scholarships to coaching as well. So again, and our goal tonight is $50. So I'd like to see some love tonight. Hit that little dollar sign. If you're watching the replay, please hit that Super Thanks. Okay. I said earlier I've got a personal share while we're waiting for questions. I mentioned to you guys or to you folks on Saturday a couple of days ago that I had a, I didn't have a date. I had a, I'm gonna say, I was meeting a woman who we'll call a friend, okay? And just to give you some backstory, we had connected on a dating app years ago, okay? It was just, but it never went anywhere. I think we spoke on the phone once three years ago, but never went anywhere. Partially because there's distance. There was, there's 48 miles of distance. And then Los Angeles, that's like a airplane away, okay? And then we, I went to a singles mixer in a two months ago and she happened to be there and she recognized me and she mentioned that she watches some of my videos and she recognized me from the dating apps. So we kind of kept, we didn't really, we spoke once on the phone and then, you know, it was the holidays, we kind of each did our own thing. And then we reconnected a few weeks ago and we planned on meeting, okay? And when I say it wasn't a date, it was just a meeting, okay? Hey, I want to give Melanie some props for that 49 nine super sticker. That is very sweet of you. Now our goal is $100 tonight. Thanks for the love. Okay, so we said, hey, let's just meet up just as two, you know, friends, if you will.  I feel like today, when you're meeting a total stranger, it's almost best to take the pressure off and say, let's not call this a date. Let's just call this meeting to see if we like each other kind of thing. And so that's what we planned. We originally, she wanted to go to a dive bar and she goes, how do you feel about a dive bar? I'm like, totally fine with that. We ended up meeting at the Ritz Carlton instead and it was a logistic thing. And immediately when I saw her, I was attracted to her and she was attracted to me and we hit it off and we sat down together and we had this lovely time together. And it went from a friendship date to an actual date. And we both expressed that we had mutual interest in one another and we shared a little bit about our lives. Okay, we said our good nights and we had planned on seeing each other, you know, the following weekend. What was interesting is when I woke up the next morning, I had all this resistance. I was just like, I was feeling a lot of resistance over this person. I couldn't really nail down why, was it the distance? She told me she works, you know, late at night and it's just in living in Los Angeles.  Or was there other resistance?  I was like, there's some past residue from my previous relationship. It's very minor, but I could still feel it. So I was just having this weird sense of like something doesn't feel right. It was more like intuition. And I sat with it for most of the day and I processed it along with my work and everything else. And then she ends up texting me later in that evening and said, can you talk? And I said, sure, and we got on the phone and she immediately expressed a deal breaker for her. See, my particular lifestyle doesn't necessarily fit with everybody else's lifestyle. The things, some of the things that I like to do and the way I conduct my life. First off, as a dating or relationship coach, I've heard from a lot of women I'm intimidating, but nonetheless, she expressed a deal breaker and then she also expressed the concern about the distance giving the way her lifestyle is. And we kind of concluded that it probably made no sense to move forward. I wasn't gonna chase, even though we had a good time, but I woke up with some kind of intuition something wasn't right. And then it was interesting that within 12 hours later, it was confirmed. My point in bringing this up is even two people can have chemistry, but it doesn't mean it's a fit. Even two people can like each other, it isn't a fit. See, it has to fit to make it work. If you're trying to put square pegs in round holes, it isn't going to work. And most humans haven't honed their intuition. And it's one of the reasons why we are seeing so much calamity in the dating, mating and relating realm. So I'm sharing it as story. I mean, we both like each other, but at the end of the day, if it's not a fit, it's not a fit and that's okay too. I feel like I'm one step closer. Just like Edison making the light bulb, I'm literally one step closer to meeting someone where it can be a co-creative experience that can lead to something serious. And for me, seriously, they're moving in together or getting married. All right, I wanted to share that with everyone while we were checking out while we're waiting for questions. Lisa says, you're so onto a clever and intuitive. Well, thank you. It's not you, it's me says you are intimidating. I get that. I mean, I can understand where a lot of women would feel uncomfortable uncomfortable with someone like me. I get that, you know? It's not my job to fix someone else.  The magic entertainers in the house. What do you think a guy I dated meant when he said Canadian women are too demanding? Well, I suspect at one point in his life he had a encounter or a relationship with a Canadian woman, maybe more than one. And he judged them, so basically he judged one and said all of them are that. So that's most likely what happened. I find Canadian people to be the most gracious people. I was in Vancouver, Canada, and I can't believe how, I actually, after coming back home, I was doing searches in Vancouver for women because I found them to be vivacious. I found them to be very kindhearted. You know, it was like, it was really fascinating to me. So, well, excuse me, it's fascinating to me to hear someone say that. He probably had a bad experience and they labeled it like all women are like that. It'd be like me saying, Marie is Colombian and I've only dated one Colombian in my life. And if I said something that was negative about her and applied it to the whole demographic, the geography, I mean, I think that's just a small-minded person when they label a country as being demanding. And I don't think Canadians are demanding, in my opinion, so. All right, Julie's in the house. Why are men phobic of relationships? Are they emotionally immature? They don't mind meeting up a lot? Well, you know what? I think, okay, I'm gonna give you what one of the things I think has caused more casual relationships is that the ease of sex.  Okay, I just offended a few people, but it's like prostitution. Like you, it's replaced it for men. You don't have to go to a prostitute. You can just go online and within a couple hours you can probably hook up with someone and getting laid. We've really, ladies, you have trained men to not value you. That's really part of the problem I see is, you know, if every woman were a chastity belt for the next 90 days, men would shape up. Ha, ha, ha. The other factor in this, given how many people are divorced and it felt had some miserable experiences in their past relationships, they're fearful of getting into a relationship. I mean, the reality is, you know, I was watching a divorce attorney's video and he said, would you get on an airplane that had a seven out of 10 chance of crashing? Would you get on an airplane? No, you wouldn't. In fact, airplanes have a one in a million chance or something like one in, is it a hundred million? I don't know how many flights happen in a year, but it's some ridiculously low, low, low number, okay? Like one in 10 million, one in a hundred million, okay? Relationships have like a one out of 99 out of 100 failure rate. I mean, think about it. The divorce rate for first marriage is 50%, second marriage is 65%, third marriage is 75%. Those are just marriages. What about just people dating that have had a hundred dates and will never see a person again? Or what about the relationships? Like if, think about it, if you're 60 years old and you've had, you know, eight relationships in your life that more than three months, that you mean you have a zero success rate. So people fear it because it's a, it's actually a failed technology. Relationships aren't unlike, you know, in the past when you only lived to be 30, you had one relationship in your life because you died at age 30 and I'm thinking of cave people. But nonetheless, that's just my rough thoughts on that, Julie, I hope that helped. Miss Jay, how long do you wait to date if your grief's stricken? Well, if your grief's stricken, heal the grief. There's no timeline on when you can date. You know, I learned something after my son passed away that nothing is permanent. You know, so grief is really oftentimes suffering from grief is a desire to change things. I think once you reach a level of acceptance, you can still have residue of grief. But once you've come to a place of acceptance, that's when you can probably begin to start exploring something, you know, as you're healing on yourself. That would be my invitation anyway. Thank you, Miss Jay. I appreciate that. Lisa wrote, after taking it slow for a year and a half, has he possibly developed feelings by that stage? My man is more into me since I pulled back. Yeah, but that's just when someone pulls away, that triggers an unhealthy attachment style. That's not a healthy way to sustain a relationship. Here's the thing about feelings. Feelings are not facts. They're just feelings. Just think of words like happy, sad, joyful, disgust, fear, anger, sadness. Did I say sadness already? They're all, those are just, they're not facts. They're just moments in time. When you're saying feelings, you're talking what he want to, I think what you're really asking is, is he willing to explore something deeper after a year and a half? Well, the only way you're gonna find out is talk about marriage and see how serious he is. That would be my invitation. Folks, listen, if you're in midlife and you've been with someone for a year and a half, that is plenty enough time to figure out if this is someone you want to be in your life for the rest of your life. It doesn't take much more than a year to figure that out.  I'm saying roughly a year, you know what I mean? And again, it depends on their predisposition for what they want. That's the other piece of the puzzle. Wand is in the house. Should you give someone a third chance if they have changed after a while of talking again? What's the definition of insanity doing the same thing? Like, here's the thing.  This idea, people don't change like that. They don't change, okay? Unless they had a truly dramatic, humbling event, they might have temporarily put a bandaid, okay? But, you know, you're taking the risk in this particular case. But then again, I don't know what you're looking, you know, how long you've been dating and stuff. Leafs in the house, please write question before your questions so Jonathan can see it. Please remember to hit the like button. Yes, it's easier for me to find a question when it has the word question. By the way, you are welcome to ask me personal questions. Just write the word personal question and you're more than welcome to ask me personal questions as well. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Okay, beach lovers in the house. One of our members who are membership is the red pill thing all about women being submissive, men of the household. I'm still wondering what that means. That's part of what red pill is. The idea of the red pill is, comes from the movie The Matrix. The red pill or the blue pill? The red pill is the truth. The blue pill is the illusion. Now most red pillers are critical of the feminist movement. And the reason why women are so unhappy is because they've gone to becoming self-sufficient and empowered and because of that, they're not subscribing to the traditional roles where a patriarch or a misogynistic or toxic patriarch. And so red pill espouses that we should go back to a olden way of men of the leaders of the relationship and women are subservient. That's my interpretation of the red pill. I'm sure they would give you a different narrative. They will tell you that women are self-serving and they're users and there are certainly plenty of women who are self-serving and users as well. We have an incredibly dysfunctional society. There is no doubt. But that's kind of the cliff note version of it. All right, let's keep going. Jade is in the house. What if the person says I'm not specifically, wait, what if the person says not specifically that they are not looking for something serious but they wanna start as friends and see where it goes? It's a strange thing men are saying now.  Absolutely, spend friendship all you want.  Okay, Jade, hope that helps. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Lee is in the house. My boyfriend still allows the cat on the bed. Now it even happens during sex, what should I do? So first off, I would identify what it is about that that bothers you. So get clear on what emotions that are coming up for you within this dynamic of the cat being on the bed, especially during sex, number one. Number two, assess what need you have. So it could be simply, Tim, I don't feel comfortable with the cat on the bed while we're making love. It makes me self-conscious. And when I'm self-conscious, I can't fully be open to the experience that we're both having. So I make a request that the cat that we put in another room while we're being intimate with one another is that okay with you? You identify, you then share and then you express what need, what you need from it. And then you assess how he responds to that. If he gets defensive, if he starts being critical of you, then you have deeper issues to deal with.  We can't hear you if you don't talk, okay? All right, Lee. By the way, who likes the duct tape that I pulled out today? Look at this roll of duct. I bought this just for videos, although I'm sure I'll use it at some point. Hey, by the way, we goal is $100 for our, the scholarship fund. So come on, there's a little dollar sign there. By the way, who wants to jump on the hot seat tonight? I just posted a link if you want to jump on the hot seats, okay? Oh, Barbara just said, love that lawyer. His name is James Sexton. He also has a great story about granola and blowjobs. By the way, folks, Google James Sexton video that went viral. It's an hour long and it is absolutely fascinating. Absolutely fascinating. James Sexton. All right, Lisa, my son was 19 years old when he passed away. Does anyone know the Joe Jackson song, 19 Forever? Every time I hear it, I cry. Minds me and my son. Rita says, I apologize for misspelling your name. Believe me, it happens all the time. Does not offend me. One bit. Gee is in the house.  He doesn't want to talk about what he does when I'm not with me. Can he change? You know, this isn't about him. This is all about you. What do you want? Do you have duct tape over your mouth? Okay, what do you want? You got to address, you got to establish what you want, express what you want, and you have to be willing to walk away if he doesn't meet you would want.   Become attached to them. So it's incumbent upon you to speak up. What do you want? And then express your needs to them, okay? Good luck, team. Miss Moon. Boyfriend and I have issues. I'm on a trip, told him we can talk about when I get back in two weeks. He called two times. I usually chase, but this time, don't initiate contact, keep leaning back.  You guys have issues. Talk about your issues. Stop using duct tape. Talk about your issues. Resolve your issues. Find out where you're different. By the way, conflict, by the way, if you haven't read the book, eight dates by doctors, John and Julie Gottman. Chapter two, right there, chapter two. Agree to disagree, addressing conflicts. Folks, avoiding conflict is the, sticking your head in the sand. It doesn't behoove you to do that. So have those conversations to find out what it is that you can work on. Otherwise, ask yourself, is this the right relationship for you? All tree flowers. What was the deal breaker for her? Many of you know, I like to do plant-based medicine journey, spiritual journeys using plant-based medicine. I know that that is probably a deal breaker for many of you listening to me because you have most likely judgment or excuse me, people have judgments around that. And they also, it just might not be part of their lifestyle. For me, I, ever since my son passed away, I have felt this desire to explore the meaning of life. More importantly, the nuances of life using medicine to assist me. And that's not everybody's thing. And that's okay. Actually, it was that in the distance that it was kind of two deal breakers, you know. And I'm okay with that. You know, not everybody wants to follow my journey. Some people, I've had one woman that didn't wanna date me because I'm public and I talk about my personal life like I'm sharing right now. And she didn't wanna date me for that reason. Even Marie had some resistance around that. She felt uncomfortable. So I recognize that, you know, in my shooting my note, cutting my nose, despite my face, I'm here to say I'm my, the real journey for at least me personally is evolving, it's this folks. This is the most important journey in my life is learning how to truly love myself not from a narcissistic place, not from a self-care place, not from a masturbation place. You know, I still want physical intimacy with someone. But I'm really on a journey for myself. I have lots of questions about the meaning of life and particularly what happens after death. Again, this was sparked after my son passed away. And that's not for everybody. There are places in Costa Rica. There are places in Peru. Ayahuasca, for example, there's lots of, you know, in other parts of the world, it's a very acceptable practice. And for some people here, that's a deal breaker. So anyway, that's what happened and I'm okay with that. And I might change my tune at some point but I'm still a searcher right now for that in my life. All right, happy Chrissy, happy Chrissy. I'm getting tired of doing this online dating thing. There are tons of guys looking for casual, not serious. As I get older, the quality of men keeps getting smaller. That, do we do? What do we do?   It is. The fact of the matter is, as people age, they don't take good care of themselves.  Like everybody thinks their profile is okay.  I'm just gonna be blunt. It's crappy. Most people put such poor representation on themselves. And then they're ambivalent about commitment because we have a deeply wounded dysfunctional population. Folks, here's my chart on emotional maturity and relationship skills. This is not a fact, it's merely an opinion. 20% of the population has clinical issues and by the way, ladies, this is you too. When I say 20% of men and women, 60% is dysfunctional. And while I say 20% are emotionally healthy, I'm being rather generous there. We are swimming in a sea of dysfunctionality. So then the trick becomes, if you're looking for a needle in the haystack, first become your own needle. Heal from your past. Learn good relationship skills. Take good care of your body. Put a great representation on yourselves so you can become a magnetic attractor for the other needle. That's the secret. Moving the secret, that's the secret. That's the secret. First, you have to become the needle and then you use an electromagnet. You don't have to burn down the haystack. You use an electromagnet to attract in what you want. What that means is you put out great energy. Then you just sit back and let the universe do the work. When I say by great energy, I mean inspired action, which includes dating apps, which includes going out to social events.  That's how you change the narrative in my opinion. Does any, Chrissy, I hope that resonates with you. Come on, who wants to join the hot seat? Come on, let's get a hot seeder on now. Okay, let's keep going.  All right, let's give some love. Julie says, the duct tape is hilarious. Leif is reminding me of my Joe Jackson song. Thank you. Barbara's back in the house. Do men have the emotional capacity to see a woman's value and aim to raise their standards or simply seek easier and not to meet a woman's standards? Well, see, does a woman have the emotional capacity to see a man's value? I see a lot of women that don't see my value. They are stuck. So I'm intentionally, look it. This is not a male-female thing. This is a human thing. See, if a person can't see your value, it's because they don't see their own value or they are so stuck in their ego. You ever watched the Housewives of Beverly Hills or any of the other Housewives?  So we have people that are stuck up in their ego or they don't see their own value. It is not a male-female thing. It is a human thing, Barbara. But yes, when a person doesn't know their own value, or they're stuck in their own ego and their value, they have a hard time seeing someone else's value. Leanne is in the house. I'm dating a man who cheated on his wife which led to the divorce 15 years ago. My sister says, once a cheater, always a cheater. Is that a rad flag? He was upfront about it early on. So, Leanne, has your sister ever lied in her life? Has she ever lied in her life?  Here's the thing about this. And I've had several friends. Let me reframe that. Several people I know who were unfaithful to their spouse. Now, they happened to be in loveless marriages. In some cases, they slept in separate bedrooms. And these men or women stayed in the relationship because it was their duty. The relationship, the marriages ended, and they went off to find other partners in their life, and they were absolutely faithful to these other partners. You have to find out why was the cheating? Is the person a sexaholic? Is that the why? Or was there something missing in the relationship? And then the question becomes, is this new relationship a healthy relationship? If it's not a healthy relationship, yes, they will most likely repeat a pattern. But that saying, once a cheater, always a cheater? Well, guess what? If you've ever driven illegally, once an illegal driver, always an illegal driver. Have you ever lied?  Have you ever stolen something that wasn't yours? Once a stealer, always a stealer. It's just, but I will say this, people that have emotional issues, if they don't heal, will most likely repeat a pattern. That is most likely true. Thank you, Leanne. Krista says, actually plant-based medicines enhance the body's natural healing proprieties. I'm a big believer of that.  I don't trip, I actually go deep. It's meditation to me, but thank you, I appreciate that. Anna says, have you ever dated a female dating coach? Most of them are dead broke, so I probably wouldn't. I'm sorry, I'm superficial in that way. I want someone who has financial stability. Most dating coaches, I mean, I'm in the 1%ile, folks. And I'm not saying that arrogantly, I'm just saying, most coaches don't make a living, you know? But would I date one? Yeah, if she subscribed to my philosophy, most dating coaches, but Jonathan, we're supposed to lean back and let the man lead. You know, like they don't subscribe to my philosophy, most female dating coaches.  But would I date one? Ah, who knows?  The each lover says, let's start a plant-based group. There are plenty of plant-based groups out there. I'm in several meetup groups along those lines. By the way, Lighthouse says, can you add that to your profile and help define the one? Okay, folks, you just put it out there. So let's read from Jonathan Asley's match.com dating profile as we speak, because I do include that. All right, I'm gonna read my dating profile here. For the past five years after losing my son, I've been on a deep exploration to find out who I really am beyond fear and ego. A journey of self-love who seeks a marriage-minded woman, or at least living together, who wants to explore the depths of love. This isn't about growing old with someone. I want to grow in life and love with a remarkable woman.  We're a fit if you have a curious mind because I'm attracted to an inquisitive woman interested in expanding mutual consciousness. Let's say personal development and spirituality are my jam. Is it yours too? The depth of a soul is so vast that we need lifetimes to get to know our true love. My heart yearns for a woman capable without the distractions of doing, of going deeper to explore the truest meaning of what it is to love. I desire and seek someone who can go down rabbit hole conversations wanting to know how I feel and what I think as I do the same for her. The person with the curious mind versus wanting to know what's up. Most humans talk to each other instead of with each other, which they believe is communication. In my world, real communication is intimacy, speaking from the heart, but more importantly, hearing from the heart. I describe myself as tall with dark hair and a big teddy bear heart. Maybe I'd say I'm a good guy with an edge and yet I'm human with insecurities or dare I say flaws? The thing that freaks me out most is condiments. I can't stand to be near ketchup and mustard, but yet what I can do is hold your heart like a precious jewel as your lover and heart protector. Yeah, I can't stand condiments, ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise and relish, the four horsemen of the apocalypse to me. Professionally, I'm a writer and speaker and coach who chooses to be more of service than chasing money or power because I want to spread self-love to all who are suffering. At the same time, the universe has seen fit to reward me with abundance and I'm financially self-sufficient seeking a partner who is the same. Ideally, I'd like to meet a conscious empowered woman who is a combination of feminine and masculine in the sense that she is both a giver and a receiver. She has a big heart that yearns to be expressed with healthy emotional maturity and good relationship skills and can truly open her heart to love. She is either an empty nest or no children with the time to explore and play in the depths of love. Ideally, she'll be self-employed and free to spend time regularly here in Redondo Beach. She is a natural giver she is a natural giver without being a doormat financially independent and has a generous sharing nature who would be interested in plant-based medicine ceremonies to explore the deeper consciousness to explore deeper consciousness and spirituality. See, it's on my dating app, I said it. The question I'd like to ask each other, who am I? Who are you? Let's explore the journey side by side. Thank you kindly for taking the time to read this and listen to it, everyone. Yes, I'm a graduate of the Hoffman Process Insights Seminars one, two, and three. I'm a big fan of Abraham Hicks. Joe dispends a course of miracles, Wayne Dyer. If you have a strong desire to join my mission to spread love and awaken human consciousness, please feel free to contact me. All I ask is you read my profile carefully and ask yourself, are we a fit? So to answer your question, Lighthouse, it is. What'd you guys think of that? What'd you guys think of my dating profile? Pretty intimidating, right? But look, see that to me, and maybe I'm arrogant here for me, that is a quality profile. I think that gives paints a picture. It just paints a picture. It's not my entire book, it's just, it paints the cover of who I am getting to know, like I said, the depth of a soul takes lifetimes, lifetimes to learn.  Your pictures are terrible and your introduction, let me say, let's say there's the pictures and then the introduction. Anyway, Cheryl says, I don't find you intimidating. I think you're swell. Your radical honesty is attractive and exciting. Thank you so much for that, I appreciate it. June says, I have had very deep spiritual experiences with plant-based medicine. I do think people should really be called to it. I think for some people, it is amazing. Oh, Prima says, I'm in nutritional science and biochemists after losing my dad, I started my journey toward plant-based medicine and it's healed me from disease and took, that took my dad, oh, that's wonderful to hear. Um, Lisa says, become what you need exactly. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Rita says, dear Mr. Ashley, it's Asley by the way, you are not intimidating, you tell it like it is, we need more people like that in life. People who think you're intimidating are just afraid. I'm just, I just had people say that about me. So I'm just aware that that has been said. Let's keep going. Bum, bum, bum, bum. Margaret says, when are you gonna start a men's group? Well, I began shooting videos for a new men's channel. It's in my, by the way, if you go to my homepage on YouTube and see it says Jonathan for men, I will start posting probably within the next couple of weeks. I'll be posting videos for men there. Phyllis says, dating coach, one I saw online married, lot of married people, yeah, that's true. Krista says, I had no idea that most dating coaches are and were actually broke. Um, you know, there's a lot of people giving dating advice that make no money, yes. But there are plenty that do make a living at it. So I'm not saying all are broke, but a lot are. There's just a lot of coaches out there that are wannabes. And honestly, to be a successful coach, you have to be more of a successful marketer, you know, and most people don't know how to market to make money, to get clients. That's really what it's about. But I do believe a lot of female coaches sell you ladies on the Prince Charming narrative, even though it doesn't seem that way, that's how they package it.    We are just a dysfunctional society. That's my point of view. Not everybody, just a lot of people. By the way, we were nice enough to get a $50 donation in the beginning. Come on, we're getting at the tail end of this. There's a little dollar sign. Give some love tonight to the Connor Asley Scholarship Fund. Krista said, since you mentioned rabbit hole discussions, what are your thoughts about Alice in Wonderland? Yeah, I love Alice in Wonderland. I actually liked the Johnny Depp version. I mean, certainly there's the cartoon, there's the animated version from Disney. But the story itself, the book itself, yeah, there's a lot of metaphors in there for, I suspect Lewis Carroll. I believe Lewis Carroll was there. Hey, hey Google, who was the author of Alice in Wonderland? Yeah, Lewis Carroll, I was right. So there was some suspicion that he was into plant-based medicine journeys when he wrote the book. So yeah, I love that. I love the song, the Jefferson Starship Song, White Rabbit. I wish I could play it right now, but YouTube would block for copyright. Rebecca, may I ask how long you have used the same profile narrative? Great question. So I rewrote that after Marie and I split up. So it's only a few weeks or a few months old. I just, I rewrote that. I wanna say November 1st. So that's when I rewrote it and an older version. But I felt it was time to redo it. By the way, that lady didn't, we met through a different site that wasn't as progressive as match.com. And we met at a singles mixer, by the way. What is a DF spirit? I don't know what that is. Someone said, I'm a woman yet possess a DM spirit. I value truth and justice, but not necessarily the American way. I don't know what DM spirit is. Okay, be curious to know what that is. Oh, now we see some love. Okay. Finally, Margaret, $15 Super Sticker. Thank you for the love. Jenny, thank you for the love. And Emily, thank you for the love. So that's $20, $30. Okay, we need $20 more to hit our goal for 100 tonight. Thank you so much for the love. Beach Lover says, watch it, Jonathan. I have a ketchup package.  Oh, divine masculine, divine feminine. Okay, folks, I don't like the terminology. Let's just say you have your divinity.  You know what, to me, masculine is simply doing. Feminine is simply receiving in my world. And I believe if we're a good, healthy human being we give and receive. So we don't need to put the narrative, divine masculine, the divine feminine. How about just our divinity? How about being in your divinity? Take out the gender references. This is why things are fucked up is we've got these narratives and these expectations based on gender instead of just showing up as a sovereign human being instead of showing up as a sovereign human being. Does that make sense? Look at Christa says it makes sense. Hey, so what did you guys think of my dating profile? Just, I mean, I know that was a lot to take in but what did you think of it? I'd be curious to read. Magic Entertainer, what do you think is the best way to get over someone is to get under someone? What if it doesn't work, do it? See, I'm not a big fan of the best way to get over someone is to go sleep with someone else. I don't feel like that's healthy. Just do the work on your own but it's not fair to listen. I am quite aware that there's still residue left from my past relationship but it's just residue and I think we're always going to have residue from our past. If I had a charge and I needed to go be with someone else to release that charge, kind of an interesting metaphor there. It's not fair to the other person. I think that's using someone and I don't think that's fair. Anyway, that's my two cents on that. Lady Citra says, I like your profile. You put your truth out there. Unfortunately, many people don't. You know, folks, I've just been blessed. Doing this work has allowed me to really get to know who I, by the way, particularly after my son passed away, I've gotten the gift of learning how to be expressive. Very few humans actually know how to do it. So anyway, okay, so I'm gonna wrap up in a moment. Guess what? Tomorrow night, I'm speaking at a singles mixer. It's for age groups 30 to 55. So it's a little bit younger than the demographic here but I'm grateful that I'm gonna be speaking at an event for an hour.  It's a singles mixer. I'm gonna talk about the stuff I talk about here on the channel. I wish you could attend but I know most of you live all over the place but if you happen to be in Los Angeles, I'll post a link in my community page here as soon as we wrap up for any of you that'd like to see me live tomorrow. And hopefully in the next few months I'll be doing more live speaking gigs in Los Angeles if you'd like to see me in person, okay? So we're gonna wrap up this video as I always do. First off, did you find value in this video? If you did, please hit that like button. Please share this video. Please subscribe to my channel. If you've got something to say, post a comment below. I do my best to read them all. Also, check out my link to schedule a discovery call with me to join my group called Midlife Love Mastery to follow me on Instagram, all that good stuff. And we'll take it from there. Does Marie watch your content PowerGee? She never did watch my content so she's not watching it anymore so she doesn't watch it. And if you'd like to see me live, post a comment on this video. Say, Jonathan, I'd love to see you live sometime in the future and maybe if you could join my mailing list I'll send you some info on it as well. We're gonna wrap up this video as I always do.  I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love if that's okay. I'm asking you to turn to someone, a pet, a teddy bear or pillow and give it or them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love. And let's face it, we could all use more love in our lives. I wanna thank Leaves and Jody and Dee Dee, Magic Entertainer, Lighthouse, Teya, Krista, Leslie, Jade, Happy Chrissy, PowerGee, Jenny, Dee Dee, Wendy, Cibella, Margaret, Lady Citra, June, Beach Lover, The Magic Entertainer, Terry, Kathy, everyone, big hugs. Thanks for being on tonight. Love you guys. Have a fab.


On behalf of Immaculata University, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I feel like I can't really express just in words how grateful I am. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I can't imagine what we would do if we didn't have donors. I'd just like to say thank you. Thank you for the opportunity to be at such a beautiful place. I missed it. I even missed it. Thank you. Thanks very much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.