Hey guys, welcome back to another week of what's for dinner. My name is Andrea with food inventory adventures in food If you are new to our channel, welcome. If you are a returning supporter, welcome back in my household It's me my husband and our eight-month-old baby and for the past several weeks now I have been working on using up stuff from my freezer fridge and pantry. I'm not trying to totally use everything up I'm just trying to use what we have. So we are kicking off another week of what's for dinner with some Posteroni, which is something that I had in my pantry for a while that I needed to use up. My husband had some fresh zucchini in the fridge. So I sliced it up and he put tons and tons of seasoning on there On paprika and some other stuff and then he grilled it and along with the zucchini He also grilled up some boneless pork chops that we had in the freezer as well We had a or have a big pack of pork chops from Sam's So we just grabbed a couple out of the freezer and then we left the rest in there because I'm gonna be using it for a Crock-Pot meal and then we are having some sister Schubert's yeast rolls I have these or I'll have them in my freezer from Sam's We've been eating off of these things for a while and they are taking up so much space and so I forget about them So I just moved them from my outside freezer to my indoor freezer And so hopefully I'll remember to use these for meals because it's taken up a lot of space and it is Not allowing me to buy as much stuff as I want to at the grocery store And then we are also I don't eat zucchini. So I am going to have Caesar salad and so this is from Aldi and it's in a bowl here We're just gonna serve ourselves at the dinner table But what I've noticed and I don't know if you guys have noticed this too, but today is September the 6th This does not expire until September the 13th. I feel like their produce goes bad fast I don't know if that's just me or if other people have noticed that but I'm glad I did use it today because it was already starting to turn kind of brown So I'm having a Caesar salad on the side So this is what we are having for dinner tonight and we'll see you guys next time Hey guys, so for dinner tonight, we are having something that we have not had in a very long time We are having breakfast for dinner. So I made the fried potatoes and Howard made everything else We are having everything that we are having we had on hand So I had potatoes and onions on hand We had some pre-cooked bacon in the freezer that Howard Howard made. He made some toast and then he made fried eggs Fun fact, I did not eat a fried egg until I met Howard I didn't know they could be made well done with the yolk cooked all the way through so I Really love his fried eggs and he puts grated Parmesan on there for me So I am looking forward to dinner tonight. So this is what we're having and we'll see y'all next time All right guys, so I am trying out a new recipe tonight. It is for a deep dish pizza Already things have not started off well at all. So I'm a little nervous So it calls for two packages of this pizza crust. You just add water to it So you're supposed to follow the package directions and my never set up Double-checked and looked and I added in twice the amount of water that I was supposed to It calls for a half a cup of water per package and I added in one cup per package Had to throw out the pizza batter because it was not dough. Luckily in my cabinet I happen to have these two pizza crust mixes same size as a Betty Crocker They were a little bit more expensive and I just wanted to try them as a variation I'm glad I happened to have them in my cabinet. So made those and you're supposed to put it in a 9 by 13 pan Press it up the sides. That's my oven preheating press it up the sides and Add in all the toppings. However on all of the reviews that I read It said that the pizza was too doughy if you just added the toppings on top of the dough So I decided to par bake it for about 11 minutes. So that's where we are right now in the process So I have the mixture here. You're just supposed to add ground beef pizza sauce and onions and green peppers and That is going to Be your meat portion Then you're supposed to add mozzarella cheese and I just had a couple of open packages in the freezer that I wanted to use and Now I'm going to add some pepperoni. This is a new pepperoni that I found one new flavor I should say hot and spicy. I had not seen that before. I just tasted one. That's Harrison in the background I'm sure you guys know that But it's really not that spicy it tastes like a slim gem if you've ever had that so it doesn't really have a lot of All right, so I've got all the pepperoni on there and so now it says to Cover up this casserole dish with foil And I think you bake it for like 25 30 minutes something like that and then you uncover it and let it Get nice and brown. So I'm a little hesitant about covering up this pizza But we'll see and I'll make sure to Leave the recipe in the description box if you know, hopefully it turns out well. So see you in a little bit All right guys, so here is the pizza. I just took it out of the oven So I need to let it cool and you can hear it sizzling And let me show you the side of the pizza here it is looks like a deep dish, but we will see So I will show you what it looks like as soon as I give it all plate it up so here is the pizza I cut a Couple of pieces out for Howard and I and we tried it. I just think it's okay. Howard said he liked it Let me try to get some in the casserole dish so you can kind of see it I thought the crust is gonna be a lot more doughy than it is. It's actually not too bad If I made this again, I would definitely have to experiment with the crust That's Harrison. I definitely have to experiment with the crust But if you the type of person who doesn't mind a dough that's a little bit softer You would probably like it too. So anyway, this is what we were having for dinner tonight and we'll see you guys next time Hey guys, so for dinner tonight, I went to my freezer and I pulled out This Kung Pao chicken from Trader Joe's and then this Kung Pao broccoli from Aldi This was something new that I picked up on a recent shopping haul and I will make sure to link it So you guys can check it out But we really like the Kung Pao chicken from Trader Joe's and here it is I just made some jasmine rice to go with it And this is what the broccoli looks like. I was a very disappointed in this. So let me show you the package again Here's the package Here's what it looks like and I didn't realize when I bought it that it was a steamer bag So I did buy two so next time I make it I think I will stir-fry it and see if it comes out any differently and one thing I wanted to mention too about the Kung Pao chicken it comes with Peanuts, but the peanuts come in a separate bag. Howard and I we both like peanuts We just don't like them in our food So they come separately and these are fried peanuts and we just eat them on their own actually everything comes separately So the chicken comes separately the vegetables come separately and the sauce and the peanuts come separately But anyway, we really like this Kung Pao chicken a lot So this is what we are having for dinner tonight, and we'll see you guys next time Hey guys, so for dinner tonight We are having something that I picked up from all the a couple of grocery hauls ago It is this pasta sauce starter. It was a new item. I think it was just seasonal. I haven't seen it since But it is basically just get the cheeses and black pepper And then what you do is you cook your pasta and then you put this sauce mix in a bowl Then you add some pasta water to it and you toss it with the pasta So the pasta I had in my pantry I've been buying pasta whenever I go to the grocery store just to have it in stock just in case anything happens We do have pasta to eat at least and so here it is on the plate Howard and I tried it and it does not to me. It does not taste like Alfredo sauce Howard said he likes it. I think it's just okay I mean, I would buy it again if Howard wanted it, but I wouldn't have to go out and buy it It's not creamy like Alfredo. It's mostly you just taste the cheese and the pepper and then with it We are having some garlic bread. I did not feel like making a green vegetable tonight So we're not having that but this is the garlic toast that I talk about all the time This is pretty much the only one that I buy and I get it from Tom thumb So we really really like this stuff and I just popped it in the air fryer So this is what we are having for dinner tonight and we'll see you guys next time


Thanks very much. I'm just a humble member of a larger study team, so it's my pleasure to present to you the outcome of our study that we conducted in Grozny in the Republic of Chechnya between 2014 and 2015 to evaluate the impact of an individual counseling intervention. The World Health Organization estimates that in an acute emergency between 15 to 20 percent of the population will develop a moderate mental health disorder. As you've heard today, there's a global focus on increasing mental health services in emergencies and for humanitarian agencies such as MSF to scale up our services. However, there's limited evidence on the impact of these interventions, particularly on the individuals that are participating in them. The Republic of Chechnya, for those of you that don't know, is located in the Caucasus region between Russia and Ingushetsia. It experienced greater than 20 years of conflict in the 1990s and early 2000s, and it continues to face an ongoing atmosphere of insecurity and instability. MSF conducted a survey in 2004 amongst internally displaced persons in Chechnya and determined that most of them were suffering from somatic complaints, anxiety and insomnia, depressive feelings and social dysfunction. Recently, Chechnya has undergone rapid reconstruction and development. MSF runs a mental health program in the Republic of Chechnya since 2001 in collaboration with the Ministry of Health. The program focuses on individual counseling, psychoeducation, group counseling and training of medics to recognize mental health problems. It does not focus on psychiatric problems. Our study hypothesis was that the intervention related to individual counseling improves the functioning of adult clients that attend our program in Chechnya. The location of the study and also the vast majority of our mental health program runs in three Ministry of Health Hospitals, which are located in Grozny. The target population of the mental health program and therefore of our study was persons who suffer from chronic stress and multiple traumas and who are self-referred to the mental health program. The individual counseling intervention has as the objective to improve functioning and symptoms of its clients.  The methods of individual counseling focus on theories that are derived from trauma focus therapy. Okay, so we conducted a randomized controlled trial using a step wedge design. The reason for the design to use a step wedge design was because it would account for time effects between the intervention and the control group. I will go through the process of inclusion and then the follow-up. So people that presented to the MSF mental health program were initially screened and they were screened to complete certain eligibility criteria. They needed to be over 18 years of age and they had to score greater than 1.75 on the Hopkins Symptoms Checklist 25. This is a validated scale internationally which measures symptoms of anxiety and depression. Clients who were not considered for inclusion in the study, if they are identified to have active suicidal ideation, a major psychiatric disorder that required medication, or if they'd been enrolled in the same MSF mental health program in the previous six months. Each of these exclusion criteria was established through a series of questions. Once they were considered eligible for inclusion in the study, they underwent informed consent and then they were randomized to two arms of our study. The randomization was done by a computer-generated randomization list which were located at each of our hospitals and the study counselors that were doing the enrollment were blinded to that process. Then we went to the intervention and the control group. The intervention group underwent a pre-counseling evaluation which I will explain in a moment and then they went immediately into the individual counseling component of the mental health program. Following the completion of that intervention, they underwent a post-counseling measurement. The control group also underwent a measurement at this point and then they entered a two-month wait-listed period. During that period, they were contacted once by our study team to ensure that their symptoms had not deteriorated. Then once they came back after the two-month wait-listed period, they underwent another evaluation and then they were immediately enrolled in the intervention of individual counseling. To measure functioning and symptoms, we used six different scales. For the functioning, we looked at the short Form 6, SF6, which measures aspects around general health, body pain, social supports and emotional functioning. We had also developed a Chechen functioning scale for males and females in a previous qualitative study. We also used the MSF functioning scale, which MSF OCA is using as a regular monitoring tool for our clients in mental health programs across our operations. We also looked at three scales for symptoms. So the Hopkins symptoms checklist, which I mentioned before, which looks at anxiety and depression, the HTQ 16, which looks at symptoms related to post-traumatic stress disorder, and the MSF scale looking at symptoms, which is similar to the MSF functioning one, which we use for regular monitoring and evaluation. In the analysis, we looked at a primary outcome to compare the scores and the difference in scores between the intervention and the control group at the post-counseling moment, so when the intervention group had completed counseling. The effect size and the difference of gain scores is calculated as something that's called Cohen's D, and the important point to remember here is that a large effect size is if you get a Cohen's D that is greater than 0.75. We also constructed a multivariate regression model to compare differences in mean gain scores, and the adjustments included hospital recruitment, age, sex, marital status and employment status upon enrollment, the number of counseling sessions that the intervention group had undergone, and coping mechanisms. All analysis was done using an intention to treat model. So these are our results.  We randomized 84 persons to the intervention group and 84 to the control group, and as you see, the vast majority of the clients that were in the study were female. The differences between the two groups was not significant. In the intervention group, there was a six-person dropout between enrollment and post-counseling, and in the control group, there was only a four-person dropout between enrollment and once they completed their wait-listed period. The intervention group underwent a mean of 3.8 sessions, and those 3.8 sessions lasted for approximately 32 days. So these are two examples of the scales that we used to measure functioning. So on the left-hand side, you see the SF6 related to general health. In purple is the intervention group, and in green is the control group. What you see on the left-hand side is the scores that they had prior to counseling, and then the second part of that graph is what the scores they had after counseling in the intervention group and for the control group once they completed their wait-listed period. So you see that intervention and control group are quite similar prior to counseling and that there's a significant increase in the intervention group and even a slight increase and thus improvement in the control group. Cohen's D for this scale had a medium effect size. Then on the right-hand side, you see the thing that we use for the MSF functioning scale is the scale from 1 to 10. Again, intervention and control group are very similar pre-counseling with a significant improvement in functioning measured post-counseling for the intervention group compared to the control group. These are all the scales that I mentioned before, and I'll just draw your attention to the top three. So the ones in the red box all had Cohen's D, so large effect sizes, and all were highly significant. So the intervention group compared to the control group did substantially better on these three scales. Social support, Chechen functioning for females, and the SF6 around general health had a medium effect size. And the SF6 for body pain had a small effect size, and we kind of attribute that to the fact that the majority of our clients were actually enrolled in a hospital-based environment, so possibly that their health problem had not resolved. This is a similar analysis that was conducted for the scales that we used to measure symptoms. If I draw your attention to the column D, so that's the effect size, you can see that for all the scales that we used to measure symptoms, there was a large effect size between the intervention group and the control group, so a dramatic and significant increase in improvement in symptoms in the intervention group compared to the control group. This very busy table shows the adjusted analysis using the regression model that I mentioned before. If you look at the unadjusted column compared to the adjusted column, you see that the scores actually didn't change so much once we accounted for the covariates, and that almost all of them are highly significant. The only one that was not significant is the scale related to the Chechen functioning in males, and we attribute that probably due to the fact that we didn't have as many males enrolled in our sample. Obviously, this is an important study and I think it's the first time that MSF has tried to measure the impact of mental health programming using this type of approach, but there were limitations. So as I mentioned before, we did a hospital-based recruitment, so obviously the results are not necessarily represented for the rest of Grozny or the rest of Chechnya. We did our very best to ensure the blinding and definitely upon enrollment, we are quite confident of the fact that our study counselors were completely blinded to the allocation of groups, but we can't exclude that during follow-up visits and follow-up measurements that that status was possibly revealed in the conversation. At the moment, we can't extrapolate the findings to emergencies and acute trauma or even to persons that are experiencing more severe mental health distress. So in conclusion, we think that the counseling intervention that's included in the MSF mental health program in Grozny is significantly improving functioning and significantly reducing symptoms of our clients, but we really encourage everybody in this room working in similar contexts and particularly in acute emergencies to confirm that the same approach for the mental health program also is working here. There's a lot of people to acknowledge from MSF, also Johns Hopkins University, but our thanks really goes out to the clients that were enrolled in the study. You saw the dropout rate was pretty amazing, so they really committed to it once they enrolled, and then finally the study team across three locations. So thank you very much.


Hi, my name is Zach Swasta. I am an intern at ACMI from Emerson College. My original hometown is Horse Heads, New York. My favorite movie is Star Wars and I'm a huge fan of the TV show It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. I want to be an intern at ACMI because it is an interesting community experience which I have always been about. I have always been about the community feel and bringing people together because I am a people person first and foremost and I like the idea of bringing people together to create good stories for good people.


T F N N headline news update Good afternoon everybody. I'm Tommy O'Brien coming to you live from T F N N headquarters in St. Petersburg, Florida 1 p.m. Eastern time on Wednesday three hours left to go in the trading day We got markets in negative territory Dow Jones right now negative 36 points trading at 26,000 617 We've got the NASDAQ right now negative 13 trading at 8106 and SMPs negative by 7 trading at 29 30 dollar index positive 385 ticks trading at 97705 got gold up $4 at 1277 80 notes and bonds higher price lower yield tenure note up 12 ticks 123 16 30-year bond up 26 ticks almost a full point 147 10 start things off. Let's take a look at the indices the futures markets will start it off with the Dow 30 So we've had a little bit of a slide to negative territory from earlier this morning 8 a.m. We make highs in the Dow of 26,691 as we speak Approaching the intraday low that we had just after the opening bell. You have the Dow trading 26,605 NASDAQ 100 making session lows as we speak 7809 even as we approach 11 a.m. We're up there at 78 45 So you're talking about almost a half a percent. We've pulled back in the last two hours S&P we were up here this morning 11 a.m. Of 2939 we're now approaching 10 S&P points below that level just even in the last 10 minutes We've traded about four or five points to the negative side in those futures Crude oil we got EIA numbers this morning at 10 30 We saw a build of 5 million plus barrels the estimate was only for a build of about a million barrels You saw oil trade from 66 dollars and 20 cents. We trade under the 66 level You're sitting at 65 dollars and 83 cents currently June crude and gold catching a bid as we have gold trading up 1277 briefly above that 1280 price point Terms excuse me in terms of what else you have happening out there It is still earning season some of them out there as we look what we'll talk about this one real quick PG&E the news story breaks this morning that maybe Berkshire Hathaway is gonna be buying PG&E Quite a spike up to 2858 Berkshire comes out and says nope fake news not happening still though on just the hint of that You're treating up 6% you got Boeing No more 2019 forecast for Boeing and the market says guess what we already knew that was coming We're up 1.3% and the big one today. How about Tesla? Coming out with their earnings after the bell Tesla right now down about a half a percent $262 stay tuned folks Steve Rhodes coming up right now with the Traders Edge have a great Wednesday


So outright this comes with 4 classes to play with. The demo is almost a month old and the full game comes out next week, well about 7 days from this video being released. And today I rank the classes the demo offers in order of which I feel they are most effective. This is and I feel it's important to mention is based off demo gameplay obviously and things will change going into the full game no doubt. As it gone guys my name is DPJ and if you enjoyed this video leaving a like really helps and if you like what you see I want to see more outriders on a daily basis be sure to subscribe. So the demo has almost been out a month and I won't lie I went into the demo already in reality knowing exactly which class I was going to use. But in saying this I was pleasantly surprised by what some of the other classes offered and in fact did. So let's talk about each and how I feel they perform in the limited demo we have. So my demo started with me using a trickster. For me at a class I knew I loved due to what we owed and knew in terms of playstyle etc etc and to be honest I wasn't let down. In games like this the class switch is built for that close range combat in your face combat suited what I wanted down to AT and that's exactly what the trickster is. From its healing mechanic to its abilities it's made to get in and out of places really quickly doing as much damage as possible and this is that class. It's the best out of four classes this game has which does this. Now in terms of what the demo offers and what most people are doing which is farming for legendaries killing captains over and over again the trickster is just super efficient. It just makes easy work of everything and it's because of this I feel it's by far the best class in the demo right now for like I said what the demo offers. But when it comes to the full game and what we will have in terms of upgrading playing through harder world tiers and then end game expeditions I don't think it will be as straightforward as I'm seeing people think in terms of the trickster just running through all. That certainly will not be the case and although the trickster is super efficient in what we have in the demo right now in terms of end game I'm not sure at all this will be the best class. Now from the trickster in the demo I went on to use the pyromancer due to people within my stream demand I suffer in terms of trying to farm on the pyromancer. I think it's because many people feel the pyromancer within the demo is the weakest class. So the pyromancer it was and to be honest at first I fully understood why people thought this was the weakest class. In my opinion it just doesn't offer what the other class is after in terms of ease of use. It's definitely a class to think about more. I figured this out right away. A few things threw me off with it. As I was so used to playing and farming on the trickster where things were really really easy then moving on to the pyromancer is like the opposite ends of the scale. The trickster has twisted rounds and a great healing mechanic. Devastate has those reflect bullets and a great healing mechanic. The technomancer has blighted rounds and a great healing mechanic. The pyromancer has the worst healing mechanic in terms of what we are doing in the demo and how efficient it is and doesn't in the demo have anything like the others offer to make farming way more efficient. But that doesn't mean it isn't capable of doing such it just takes way more working out. The pyromancer in the full game will have volcanic rounds and other great abilities. I feel for what we got in the demo though. The pyromancer kind of pulled the short straw but in my opinion people when it comes to end game I actually think the pyromancer might just be a cut above the rest. Definitely the trickster and the devastator anyway but we will see guys. So from the pyromancer I went on to use the technomancer. Now the technomancer was a class I actually planned to use after my trickster as I love the look of what the techie offered in terms of its abilities and while using it I can say without doubt I loved every second of it. To be honest the technomancer is made out to be that kind of sit back summon weapons and pick up enemies out of far but in my opinion this isn't what the technomancer is it isn't what it offers at all. It's just as capable of any other class in terms of being in the middle of a fight. Now in terms of the demo and what we have the technomancer is the best all around class. It's great for not just farming it has abilities and nothing here for almost everything and all scenarios. I love the fact you can use your abilities like the cryo turret to concentrate the enemy's aggro taking it off you. This for me was just one instance of the abilities that shined here. Also its blighted drones are just barbaric as good as if not better than the trickster's twisted drones which are amazing too. So yes the technomancer for me felt like the all around class it felt like it had a little of everything. Where the pyromancer felt like it was a class you had to really think about the trickster is a class in which you didn't really need to think at all and then we have the devastator which we'll move on to now. So the devastator was the last class I used within the demo and to be honest I knew a lot about this class by the point I got to getting around to using it because people kept going on about the reflect bullets mud and it's all you need to use which I understand that point. If we are only farming captains and legendaries the reflect bullets is super efficient but what about everything else the game will offer. So the devastator within the demo felt to me a lot like the trickster with just more in terms of that tank we all knew it was going to be. Now with this earth based abilities for the most part although I like the way in which they looked I mean becoming a golem flying through the air and punching the ground they look absolutely incredible but to me there wasn't anything special here which I couldn't really get elsewhere besides the obvious in that reflex bullets ability which is by far the best ability on our fair within the demo at all four classes if you're right especially like I said for what the demo offers it is truly devastated pun intended. Now what I did feel under devastate which I only truly have always felt under the trickster was the ability to be amongst a group of ads and knowing I will be capable of escaping without dying. Under pyromancer you are looking to cook somebody to get that health back which isn't easy to do within the demo and what's an offer for the pyromancer. Under technomancer unless you are set up with a decent weapon although it's entirely possible to escape danger you do have that little bit of panic sometimes. Under trickster and the devastator you don't really fear being amongst ads because it's easy to get health back and take out ads with the abilities on the offer here although I will say the trickster is still the best for this the devastator is their close second but all in all the devastator is actually a very fun class to use and when the full game comes out and we have access to the other four abilities and a massive skill tree I predict some nasty things being made with these class people. So yes guys those are my thoughts on the four classes now in the order I'd rank them from the demo fourth place being the worst I'd definitely go with a pyromancer without a doubt third spot within the demo I'd put the devastator as it just feels like a low-budget trickster in act number two we have the technomancer as it's by far the most unique to play with and at number one we have my favorite being the trickster because everything within the demo is just easy work here now in terms of when the full game releases my thoughts are the best who are completely changes now obviously we can't judge right now but go enough what we know in terms of the skill trees the legendary armor sets and abilities combined my prediction is as follows the worst class in my opinion will be the trickster as it is going to be that one-way system of use in terms of being limited to what it offers but this might suit you as much as it will suit my play style so don't take this the wrong way third I'd go with a devastator as it really isn't much different than the trickster it's just in my opinion from what I can see it offers more in terms of end game second I'd go with a pyromancer as I truly feel within that end game this will probably be the best class if used and worked right and at number one we have the technomancer as I just feel in terms of an all-round class this will be that this will fit into every situation and be great for each but hey guys those are just my thoughts I'm still mainly the trickster for the main game but in terms of what each class will offer I feel my prediction going into the full game is fair but guys tell me down below your thoughts what do you think is the best class for the demo what do you think will be the best class all-round class for the full game and what do you think will be the best end game class for the full game let me know down below people but on that note the end of the video has arrived if you enjoyed it leaving a like really helps out if you're new around here want to see more outriders on a daily basis be sure to subscribe and if you never want to miss a video I upload can turn notifications on by hitting that bell button but guys thanks as always for stopping by and hopefully I will see you on that next one


Well, we're gonna talk about some red flags some more in this topic called more red flags, mostly unavailable men tell women. So as I was preparing for this broadcast today, I was watching a video, actually it was a gamer's video, a guy named Destiny, kind of an interesting character my son turned him on to. And he was being interviewed about relationships and he made the comment, reminded me of the phrase that Chris Rock always talks about. If you're not familiar with Chris Rock, the comedian, he has this phrase that says, in the dating practice, most people show up as their ambassador of their best selves, as their ambassador of their best selves. In other words, most people on the early stage of dating put their best foot forward. And you really don't know a person until, actually what was interesting about what the gamer says, you really don't know a person until you've actually lived with them. Think about that.  And what's so fascinating to me today is people will hop into relationships and it's not even happening into relationships. They hop into bed with people they barely know. They barely have any sense of who this person is. And when I think of the relationships of my circle of friends that seem to be in healthy, happy relationships, people that met in the last half decade or so, almost all of them, their average time spent together during the process of dating was on average a three or four day, three or four times a week. That was their average. And at least if you're not living with someone, if you're averaging three or four times a week, you can actually get to know someone a lot better. In fact, you know my rhetoric that I share frequently is it takes about a hundred hours of face to face time, face to face time just to get to the first layer of trust. And let's assume trust is like a 10 step ladder. You're just at the first step. And this is why it's, I don't wanna say it surprises me or shocks me because nothing surprises me or shocks me anymore, but I'm actually rather flabbergasted how easily people will get into bed with each other with whom they don't know.  If somebody hands you a gun, that's what I meant to say, hands you a gun, you always have to assume it's loaded even if the person who's handing you the gun says this is unloaded gun, you still check and then you check again and you check again, you might check six times just to be certain, certain, certain, certain because the last thing you want to have is an accidental shooting which relate to a tragedy. Well, I'm here to say in the dating process, we have to, if you are meeting a total stranger, then you cannot blindly assume trust. You cannot blindly assume trust. In other words, you cannot blindly assume that there's no bullet in the gun. And yet today, people are cavalierly dating and ladies in particular date from a place of blind trust. Now what's interesting, I was watching another podcast that had an FBI profiler on there that profiles serial killers, serial rapists, serial murders, like I said, killers or whatnot, criminals and such. And what was interesting is that humans, she said something that humans just naturally trust people. We typically blindly trust people. And if you think about that, and by the way, let me be clear about something in the dating process. I'm not suggesting to start the dating process from a place of mistrust, okay? I'm not suggesting that. And at the same time, a lot of clues are given in the early dating process that causes us to maybe go, you know what, maybe this is something I should be asking better questions. And that's what a red flag is all about. It's about going, hmm, something doesn't seem right. I better ask, I should be asking better questions. The problem is if people are showing up as their ambassador and their best selves and you really don't know a person, oftentimes many cases women can get bulldozed into a sexual relationship. And I don't mean that, I say bulldoze in the love bombing sense, in the coming on strong sense. I don't mean in the physical bulldozing sense. So it's important to really pay attention to the clues, especially in the early stage of dating. Now, I think part of the problem women have, and please, I don't mean this with disrespect, but you bought into the Disney fantasy, you bought into movies like The Pride and Prejudice, you know, and I was thinking about Pride and Prejudice, and if you really think about it, because everybody likes the emotionally unavailable man, Darcy, who comes after Kira Knightley and professes his love, right? Well, you know what's interesting? In that movie, did you know that women basically had to parade themselves around men because the men literally chose women literally based on property, on what they can provide and it depended on how attractive they were and how cultured they were, and they had to parade around and the women, the most attractive women got the best men and the other women had to settle for whatever they could get. The one woman had to settle for that annoying priest, okay? Well, why would you want to emulate? Why would that be your ideal of what a relationship should be like? And let's just not forget that Darcy knew Kira Knightley for about a nanosecond and he professed his love. Today we would call that love bombing, we would call that coming on strong. So I think this indoctrination and what's happened is I think a lot of you forget, this idea that you want a traditional relationship, but I think a lot of you forget back in the fifties, which is where a lot of traditional ideology comes from, as well as the movies like the Pride and Prejudice and the notebook and that sort of thing. But if we go back to the fifties, there were two fundamental differences that existed during the fifties that don't exist today and it's why it's so important to pay attention to the red flags because what existed back in the fifties, at least here in the United States, was two things that was so different than today. And the first thing is what I call tribe accountability, tribe accountability. And what that meant was when you typically met people back in the fifties, you met people in the town or village or city you lived in and everybody knew each other. You were practically part of a tribe. And if one person hurt another person, there was some accountability back. You know, I'm your big brother. I always say I'm your big brother. If I could be there on a first date, I'd have my shotgun out, point it at the guy's head and saying, what are your intentions with my sister? Well, that's what we had back in the fifties was tribe accountability and you felt safe because most everybody wasn't a stranger back in that point in time. So you had that level of safety, that level of trust that doesn't exist in the same sense today because we're meeting total strangers, meeting total strangers most of the time. It is so rare these days that two people are dating because they actually know each other. So it's important to recognize this. And the second thing that doesn't exist today as in the past is the barrier, excuse me, the entry level to sex is almost non-existent. The entry level of the sex, by the way, think about in the fifties, the entry level of the sex was the man had to make a commitment. I mean, a man had to make a commitment, marry you and then agree to provide for you, talk about a heavy duty level of commitment he had to make just to get laid for the most part. Now there's certainly plenty of instances where people are having sex before marriage, but for the most part back then, there wasn't the heavy duty, repetitive dating. The average woman probably back in the fifties had one man that they've ever been with physically, maybe two, and I don't mean kissing, I'm talking about sexually. I mean, it was so rare to have multiple, multiple partners.  I was looking at a survey where it's saying most men lose interest for a woman if they haven't had sex by the fourth or fifth date. They had literally no, there was no need of commitment. So this is why if you want to be in a fully committed relationship, if you want something a little bit more substantial, then you're gonna have to go past the surface and start paying attention to, excuse me, the red flags that exist. So, I wanna just take a look at my notes, make sure I didn't miss anything here. And by the way, before I share the red flags really quickly, one of the things I teach in my private coaching, by the way, you can click the link below to schedule a discovery call with me to see if working with a coach is right for you, is I teach you how to vet for emotional maturity. I teach you how to vet men who are genuinely serious based on your personality. So again, if you want some help in this area, check out the link below. So these red flags, what I'm about to share is these are the red flags that happen usually between the first and 10th date arena, although some of them can linger on past that. But if you're hearing any of these, these are glaring red flags that you should be paying attention to. And I'm gonna do more videos on red flags. I've got a series of videos, red flag signs, red flag phrases, that sort of thing. So let's put on my trusty glasses. Bum, bum, bum, we're gonna pull up my notes. And the one that's funny, again, I said, if these happen between the first and 10th date, period of time, or even a little bit later. So you have to recognize that in the early stage of dating, men oftentimes experience what's known as lust or limerence. Limerence, and limerence means extreme infatuation.  And it mixed that with testosterone and a little oxytocin, a little serotonin, it's a chemical cocktail that makes you want to go after a person. And this is highly attractive to women.   So the first phrase that a guy, this isn't in any order, but if you ever hear the words, I love you, right from the get go, first, second, third, fourth, fifth, date, sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth, 10th date, that's a big glaring red flag. Because in my mind, in my world, I love you means the following. I'm here, you matter, we're important. I've got your back, I'm not going anywhere and I only want you. I'm here means I'm present. You matter means that you matter as much as I matter to myself. We are important means this is a separate entity, this relationship I'm gonna treat it as such. I've got your back, I've got your back. That means, look, I'm your partner. This is a team effort. I got your back. If you need me, I'm gonna be there.  And until you actually can feel that someone treats you in that capacity, the words I love you oftentimes are just coming from lust or limerence and it's not coming from a rooted place. So that's the first red flag we're gonna talk about. The second red flag we're gonna talk about and again, this is in the early stage of dating when someone says, I've never experienced this before. You're the only one I've experienced this. Folks, I've said this before, literally, you know, hours before I had sex and I don't know why, but as soon as I copulated, I ejaculated, excuse me, all of a sudden all those feelings were gone because no real trust was built between us. No real connection was built between us because not because the sex came easy to me has nothing to do with it. You can have sex on the first date and still get married. It's just if you don't build a real deep roots of trust through social activities, hobbies, mutual interests spending time with family and friends, traveling together. Remember I said earlier, if you really wanna get to know someone you have to live with them, well, that's what it has to feel like before you genuinely get to know someone. So when someone says, I've never experienced this before in the early stages because they're hyped up on the limerence or lust, okay? And the third one that has to do with limerence or lust is when a guy says, that's the best sex I ever had. Now, I know I've said this before, so I'm guilty of this and I've certainly felt like at that time it was the best sex, but here's the thing. That can be a very intoxicating phrase as a woman to hear from a man that this is the best sex, especially if you felt the same way. And that might cause you to have a false sense of intimacy with this man, a false sense of intimacy, a false sense of real commitment when someone says that's the best sex because why would they ever wanna break up with the best sex they've ever had? Because the truth is sex to man doesn't mean as much in the same sense as women. It means to women. Women, men can disconnect from sex, but women, when they give their body to a man, you oftentimes get very attached. That's because a chemical is being released from your body called oxytocin and that bonds you to the guy. And you're bonded to a guy, but he's not bonded to you. So be careful of that phrase. The red flag is more not that he said it, it's more you should be hyper aware that that's a very intoxicating phrase for a man to say, especially if you felt like it was the best sex you guys ever had. Okay, here's one for you ladies. I can't believe how many women still entertain men who are married, but this is for those ones. My wife and I haven't had sex in years. My wife and I haven't had sex in years. Actually, a man doesn't have to be married to say this, a divorced man could say that. And that could create a false sense of connection with you. But certainly if a man said that, who's married, you're thinking, well, I'll be the one to change him.  That's certainly a red flag. Now, here's one I'll be candid with you. I raised my hand, I'm guilty of this. But if you hear this from a guy, and I'm gonna share my story in a moment, but if you hear this from a guy, it's definitely a red flag. When a guy says, I'm sorry, I left my credit card and wallet at home. This is for that first, second, third, or fourth date. Now, I actually had this happen to me.  So I was pulling into a gas station because I needed gas. That's when I noticed it. And I only had like 20 or 30 bucks on me or maybe I had 60 bucks on me and I needed gas. So I put $20 in gas and I called the woman or I texted the woman said, look, and I'm really sorry. I'm about 10 minutes, I was about 10 or 15 minutes away from the date. And I said, look, I got to be upfront with you. I left my wallet at home.  I was gonna be about 45 minutes late at that point to be able to go all the way back. And she said, no problem, it's okay, we can meet but I called ahead of time because I noticed it when I was at the gas station and she totally understood. I had $40 cash, I contributed, she contributed and we ended up having a nice date didn't go anywhere. But maybe she just rejected me for that. I don't remember what happened. But my point is if a guy does that, that's certainly a red flag. Now, again, there's always the exception to the rule like what I think happened to me but that's certainly maybe something that a red flag, remember a red flag really means ask better questions of yourself. Don't blindly just trust a person. Be a little, not to, I don't want you to have armor. Okay, I don't want you to have walls or borders with guys when there's red flags. What I merely want you to do is step into your sovereignty, your self-worth, your self-esteem, have boundaries. If you're not familiar with my book, what the heck is self-love anyway? That's what I mean, self-worth, self-reliance, self-esteem. This book is a journey of personal development, self-help and spiritual work. So you can actually come at it from a very confident place. So check out the link below to all the books I recommend my book self-lovethebook.com. Okay, the sixth one, can you send me a sexy lingerie pick? Any guy that does this early on, that's typically a pretty good size red flag. If he says, please send me a sexy lingerie pick.   It's easy for men to get sex these days. If you, ladies, if you wanna change the narrative then every woman on the planet today wear a chassis belt for three months and reestablish the baseline so men can't expect it anymore. And I'm saying this a bit tongue in cheek because the reality is is most men and women out there have totally terrible relationship skills and emotional maturity. If you're not familiar with my chart, by the way, this is not a fact in this opinion, I believe roughly 20% of the population has clinical issues. And while I say 20% are relationship skills healthy, that's being generous, most everybody is dysfunctional. And this is why so many of you find yourself actively dating these three types of men. And that is the users, the spenders and the growers and the users are typically the love bomber players. Again, this is not a fact in opinion. And then the spenders want connection, companionship and coupling or sex, but they have no direction. They're totally uncertain to what they want. These are those dysfunctional men I'm talking about. And the growers seek fully committed relationships and are able to take care of someone. So you cannot blindly trust, you cannot blindly think the gun is unloaded, as I said before. And the last one we're gonna share for tonight is the I've gotta work late tonight.  So when this is happening, it's usually because they put you into the maybe zone.   I like you, maybe I might wanna explore a relationship, but I maybe don't, you know? And that's what happens in many of these cases. So, by the way, is my, if this is, okay. So anyway, those are just my rough thoughts on the more phrases, emotion, unavailable men say to women, is I love you, I've never experienced this before. This is the best sex I've ever had.  Sorry, I left my credit card at home. Can you send me a sexy lingerie picture? And lastly, I've gotta work late. These are just some of the many different type of red flags out there. We're gonna do more videos on red flags. My hope is, my hope is you're not experienced this, but more importantly, I hope you really listen to the beginning of this podcast and to remember that the fantasy way of dating doesn't exist anymore. Tribal accountability and waiting for some level of commitment for sex almost seems non-existent. So my invitation for everyone is to learn the skills to determine how to genuinely trust another person instead of blindly trusting a person and be careful of the words they use because oftentimes, as I said before, you really don't know a person until you've lived with them and then you get to see who they really are. So again, I'm a big advocate of spending on average at three or four days and nights a week together doing shared activities, hobbies, mutual interest, spending time with family and friends, traveling together, teamwork, building skills, both in your personal and professional life so you can actually get to know someone at a deeper level which puts the odds in your favor to have a great successful relationship. Is this syncing in? Is this resonating with you? Please let me know. Say yes, Jonathan, this is syncing in. All right, well, that's ended our content portion of this broadcast today. We are now gonna take questions from the audience. This is a live stream and in the chat box, you can write the word question and then post the question there after or you can purchase the Super Sticker Super Chat. There's a little dollar sign in the chat box. All the monies from the Super Sticker Super Chat goes to a scholarship fund in the name of my son, Connor Asley, that's him right there, that's him right there. That's my son who passed away going on four years ago now almost, it's his birthday coming up soon. And in his honor, I've started a scholarship fund to defray the cost of personal development for those seeking help as well as donating to places like the Hoffman process and Insight seminars just to name the few. We've already donated over $2,000. I think we have a few hundred more in the account. So let's get that account up by purchasing those Super Sticker Super Chat. And if you're listening to the audio portion of this, you won't be able to see any of this. All right, do you have any questions for me? I'd like to hear what you have to say, post the word question or again, purchase that Super Sticker Super Chat.   People are saying, yes.  Oh, I love that, Carrie. This is making me how you feel for sexy lingerie. I love that. Thank you so much. Heather just mentioned a green flag. If you find a guy who says he follows Jonathan and enjoys reading, oh my God, yes.  That's a good one. All right, nurse Nessie says, do you think there's any hope for a fearful avoidant and anxious preoccupied couple? There's always hope, but it's gonna require work. It's gonna require a herculean amount of work. This is why I always recommend people to read the Hoffman process, the Hoffman process. By the way, there's a link below to all the books I recommend. This is a great book to helping heal oneself. I'm a big proponent of men and women like doing the work so they can actually be prepared to have a healthy happy relationship. Again, if you have a question for me, write the word question or post the question thereafter. And you're more than welcome to ask me a personal question by writing personal question and then post the question thereafter. Looks like we have a bashful group here tonight, which means we're gonna end rather soon if I don't get some questions in the hopper. Janet says, absolutely yes. One time a man asked me for photos, I sent him an anatomy picture of breasts. That's funny. Well, folks, looks like we don't have a lot of questions coming in today. So I think this might be a great place to wrap up today. Oh, here's a personal question from Nurse Nessie. Is personal question, is dating just as miserable for men as it is for women? So I was watching a YouTube video the other day from a workshop of men, roughly about 100 men, relatively young men. I think they were all in their late 20s, early 30s and it was a confidence-building workshop. And there was basically, and there were two guys on the hot seat right from the get-go. And the workshop leader was trying to help them build confidence through their authentic self. And I gotta tell you, these two guys were scared to death.  And I was just, I was practically, these guys were practically in tears because they felt so much embarrassment, so much shame over their inability. And these were nice young men. These were men like my son, Colin. You know, there's a picture of Colin and I right there. Colin will be 26 in a month. I was thinking these men are just like my son who are good guys, not bad men, good men. And they have a fear around women. And I think part of that fear now is also because there is this selfish side to a significant number of women, a habitually selfish side that has been promulgated or amplified, excuse me, from the social media world of Instagram and stuff. And there's such an objectification of women and a lot of women have come at the relationship process from a very entitled perspective. So if you hear men, there's a group called men going their own way. There's the red pill organizations and such. These are men that are actually, it's just like the feminists dislike women. There's the men that dislike, excuse me, the feminists that dislike men. There's the red pill MGTOW that dislike women because of the lack of real heart in the dating process, a real lack of heart in connecting with one another. And it really makes me sad. This is why I continually recommend reading the book.  So men feel used by women, just like women feel used by men. It is not singular to a gender for every woman that complains about a man, there's a man that complains about a woman out there. This is because we're not connecting at a heart-centered level. So when I was thinking about this workshop, I was thinking, wouldn't it be amazing if these hundred men were at a workshop and then a hundred women were at a workshop on their confidence skills and helping them in their relationship skills? And then they eventually met in a social setting. Could you imagine what an amazing event that would be is after you've gone through this heroic experience of tapping into your authentic vulnerable, your vulnerable authentic self. And the women were tapping into their vulnerable authentic self and they met face to face. Wouldn't that be great? But just like I started this broadcast, humans show up with the ambassador and their best selves. They're wearing a mask oftentimes. Men and women alike are wearing a mask. And this is why a lot of relationships never take off because there's so much hurt, so much pain. Everyone's little kid inside of them is hurting because of past hurts and pains, both maybe from their childhood, from their parents, maybe in their previous marriage, maybe their previous relationships. And there's so many hurting people out there, men and women alike that makes it difficult to actually lean into a healthy, happy relationship. This is why I recommend book after book after book to help you heal on the inside. This is why I wrote my book. And my hope is that men and women alike could begin to date from a different perspective. God universe spirit. I invite love into my life. Healthy, happy romantic love where the communication between us is very healthy and we have good conflict resolution skills. So if we hit some bumps in the road, we can lean into each other and we come at it from a place of patience and understanding. And we recognize that our old hurts and wounds is what blocks us from truly attracting love.  And we can lean into healthy chemistry and we can lean into that compatibility where we share the same activities where we like spending time with one another through social activities, hobbies, mutual interest. And we have the character and the qualities because we have the emotional maturity to actually forge a deeper relationship. And God universe spirit, I invite that into my life. And I invite you all to invite that into your life as well. So I hope that answers your question. Ah, I wanna thank LD for the $4.99 Super Sticker. Thank you so much, I really appreciate it. All right, did you enjoy my prayer? I hope you did. All right, let's see what we have here. Ah, Carrie says, or Corny says, when is the appropriate time to get pre-engaged? I don't, I'm sorry. I don't know if I like questions like this. First off, pre-engage. We're gonna get engaged to get engaged.  So I don't believe in pre-engagement. So I don't like that question. Sorry, Corny. But thank you for asking. I genuinely appreciate it. Rene says, Rene says, men, question men say they are great friends with an ex-girlfriend. It didn't work out, but they meet for drinks occasionally. Is it something off or acceptable? Assume friends with benefits. First off, never assume anything. Just like you never assume the gun is not loaded. As I started this broadcast. So never assume anything. Now, I am dear friends with my ex-relationship. We don't see each other that frequently. But if we did on occasion, it's there's full transparency with her live-in boyfriend. I went and visited her a couple of months ago because I was in their neck of the woods. He showed up. So as long as there's full transparency, I don't think there's anything to worry about. It's when secrecy, that's something to worry about. But there's a reason why they're broke up. Now, does that mean they're friends with benefits? Sure, but if he's a jackass enough to do that, again, you have to evaluate the existing relationship on its own merits. And if the relationship is sketchy, then it's possible that he could be engaging in relationships with someone else. But I wouldn't necessarily throw the baby out with the bathwater. And I would just request full transparency. That's my rough perspective on that, Renee. But thank you so much for that question. I really appreciate it. All right, let's go swim in. Question, is it possible I might run into my ex tonight dancing? I still have feelings for him. Plus a few women are nosy and ask about my relationship. Any words of wisdom to say? So it's natural to have feelings for a past relationship. What's more important is how you act upon it. A grownup doesn't act upon their feelings. In other words, if the relationship is over, it's over. So how do you show up? How about we learn how to become an adult, a come an adult in relationships. And what I mean to say is an adult doesn't hold unrequited love, doesn't hold, it takes a level of discipline to say, you know what, an acceptance that this relationship is over and I'm okay with that. This relationship is over and I'm okay with that. And it requires a level of self-discipline on one's own parts. And let me see if there's another book. Oh, well, you know what, you should be reading the book. I just started reading this. Why men love bitches. By the way, there's a link below. Ladies, it's time to become more empowered.  Stands for babe in total control of herself. Yes. Get into your empowerment. When you love yourself so much, you can walk into a room with any ex going, I'm in my empowerment. I'm in my empowerment. So walk in before you see him and just go, I'm in my power. And I recognize that I can choose from a egoic way to have feelings for him or I can stand in my power and say, I have feelings for myself. And as far as those nosy people, this is what I say to nosy people. By the way, chapter five in my book, by the way, I wanna read you something.  Do you see Connor right there? He had this beautiful ability. This is my book, what the heck? He had this beautiful ability to not let other people's opinion of them affect how he felt about himself. He literally indoctrinated what's in this book called the four agreements, the four agreements. And the four agreements are be impeccable with your word, always do your best. Other people's, you know, don't take anything personally and other people's opinion of you is just a projection of themselves.  Say, I, you know what I want you to say to me right now, Carrie, I stand in my power. I am not gonna let nosy people affect how I feel about myself. And as far as him, you know what? Be a grownup and say, you know what? I might have feelings for him. Doesn't mean I have to be thinking about it. All right, that's my two cents, take it or leave it. Thank you, Carrie, for your question. I really appreciate it. All right, Jules says, question. I've been texting with a guy who told me that I have to chase him. He requested a sexy photo and said, I have to seduce him or there'll be other women that will try to seduce him. So, Joel, I just wanted to show everybody there is no question in there. You did not ask a question. You made a statement, okay? Folks, one of the things that drives men up the wall is, and by the way, Joel, I'm calling you out on this because there's no question. Now, depending on what your question is, I can then, based on this information, answer it. But you didn't give me a question. All right, unless I miss something, he requests. So I get, all right, so I'm just gonna infer from here.  Can anyone tell me why you'd wanna be with this guy? Why do you wanna be with him? Answer me that question. I'm forming it in the form of a question. There's a little question mark afterwards, okay?  Because you didn't ask a question. You just said a lot of words. All right, now I apologize. I'm gonna give you a big, gigantic hug of apology from my part if you'll accept it, okay? Let's see, let's go swimming again. Let's see, Jane says, great idea, Jonathan. Men and women need to be at seminars together. Exactly, both perspectives needed badly, but sadly I imagine many men wouldn't turn up compared to women. I will tell you that I've been to Abraham Hicks seminars. I went to the Hoffman process. The room was equal men and women. You be surprised, that's a limiting belief believing that. You be surprised how many men go to personal development workshops, so start going to them. Don't believe that. Question, is sex about power?  It can be about power, it can. I think it also can be a way of a man demonstrating his worthiness. If he thinks he's a good lover, he might feel a sense of worthiness from it, so that could be one reason. But yeah, it could be power. It could be a fuck, sometimes it's just about ejaculating.  That's why I do it. You know, so anyway, thank you for your question, I appreciate it. Janet says, lovely prayer, Jonathan. I'm glad you liked my prayer, I really appreciate it. All right, Lisa writes, question. I look good from my age, but my health issues from Rx poisoning. How and when do I bring this up? That's a good question. When do you bring up health concerns? I'm a believer that if two people are exploring a relationship together, then it's important to be transparent. If it's material to the relationship, if your health concerns, issues, excuse me, could have an impact on the relationship, I think before you get physical with one another, it might be a good time to talk about this. This is why you're almost better off dating someone who's a friend first who knows your backstory, kind of like what I was talking about before when we used to live in smaller towns, everybody knew everything about each other, but I will tell you, probably be rejected a lot, depending on the health issue. By the way, herpes is not a big deal for guys, so if that's what you're concerned about, that men could care less about that. So yeah, so definitely I think you should bring it up sooner rather than later, but thank you for that question, I appreciate it. All right, FL says, Jonathan, personal question, do you do volunteer work of any kind? Do I do volunteer work? Not really. I feel like what I do for coaching is my philanthropy, it's my pro bono work, all these videos on some level.  So thank you so much for that question, FL, I appreciate it. Felicia says, date, what is that? I'm a healthy, successful, talented woman. I get the men who are afraid of me or the ones who try to control me. I've lost hope. Well, I'm sorry you've experienced that. There's a, I think a Chinese proverb or something like that. It's a proverb that says, fall off the horse seven times, get up eight times. We can all allow fear and past hurts to dictate our lives. That's one way of living life because then we can avoid pain. I'm the kind of the opposite person. The harder my life has been, and folks I'm a person who lost a child, I lost my quarter million dollar a year job, I lost a seven figure net worth, I've lost a lot in my life.   I always quote the movie. If you can guess the movie, this is the quote, get busy living or get busy dying. I'm a big junkie for love. And one of my friends once said to me, love is a risk and yet still the greatest game in town, the best game in town. So my invitation for you Felicia, you can either give up, that's okay, that's a choice. You can avoid pain or you know what, you can do all this personal development work and find that you'll attract an amazing man in your life. And that's my invitation for you going forward. Does anyone resonate with that? If you do, I'd like to hear it right. Post a comment below, post a comment in the chat box. Kit Kat says, thank you, Jonathan, for the prayer. I appreciate it. Mary Ann says, question, it seems inevitable that everyone is going to deal with some type of hurt.  Great question. I love this question. I think the ego is insidious. I think the ego is a very insidious creature. And the ego is trying, I believe the ego caused the unhealthy ego. Let me just say that the unhealthy ego creates a tremendous, I think we choose people, oftentimes they've hurt us the most so we can learn to love ourselves the most, learn to love ourselves. Let me repeat, I think we choose terrible situations so we can find ways to love ourselves. So coming back to my book, What the Heck Is Self Love Anyway? A Journey of Personal Development. I believe everything happens for you and not to you. And take personal, these are chapters in my book. Let me read you the chapters. Speak your truth, do it with kindness.  Stop effing complaining, excuse me. You're human, mistakes happen. If something's off, it is. Be of service to humanity coming back to the volunteering. Take responsibility for your choices. Everything is happening for you, not to you. If it's sincere and from the heart, you can't say the wrong thing to the right person. Your body is a machine, not a temple. Remember the importance of community and developing a tribe because we don't have tribes anymore. Your thoughts create your feelings, heal your childhood wounds, choose love over ego or fear. There is no separation between the genders from a heart-centered place. And the list goes on and on. There's over 30 chapters in my book. www.selflovethebook.com, check it out. All right, thank you, Mary Ann, I appreciate that. I hope I answered your question. So why does it happen? Why do people become bitter? Because they didn't choose to love themselves. That's the sad reality. And the ones that do oftentimes walk out with gratitude. All right, Carrie says, I love the prayer. Very helpful, insightful, brings comfort and safety. That's a wonderful, beautiful relationship is coming my way. I trust and believe and receive healthy relationships. Can I get an amen? I love that, thank you for saying that. Nurse Nessie just said, I just ordered the Hoffman process, way to go. Oh, Mary Beth, hi. All right, let's see what we have.  Exactly. I have the book, The Four Agreements, way to go. All right, B writes, question. How do I end a relationship with an emotionally immature man that the guy isn't actually taking me talking to me at the moment because he blanked, taking a step back. You can call him, you can text him or you can write him an email ending the relationship. It's all you have to do. That's simple, you can call him, text him, say, look, hey, I just want you to know I really appreciate the time we have together. I recognize that we are misaligned in who we are and what we want. And I've decided I'm gonna take a step back and I'm ending the relationship for myself and I just wish you all the best on your journey to love. If you operate from the high road, you're going to attract more high road experiences. If you operate from the low road, you're gonna get more low road experiences. So that's my invitation for you B, take the high road. Kerry says, I'm standing in my Wonder Woman empowerment. I rock, I'm in control. Exactly, stand in your power.  That's where you're going. Possible, coming back to your original question, it's possible, hard to say, but it's possible. Does it matter? Does it really matter if he's a pickup artist? You don't like what he's saying. So does it really matter the why? Just let it go, move on. Next, next, next. All right, let's see what we got here. Let's see, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. All right, this will be our last one for the evening. Question, we are boyfriend and girlfriend for two years. He wants me to travel with him, but to live together. Do you think he's waistline my time? Wait, he wants me to travel with him, but to live together. Do you think he is waistline my time? I've never heard the term waistline. Your boyfriend and girlfriend, he wants you to travel, but to not live together, I don't know where you're going with this. Folks, I need a little bit more specificity because I can't figure out what that's saying. Folks, I'm a little dyslexic, so maybe I'm reading it wrong, but I don't get what you're asking there, Sandra. All right, Shawshank Redemption, exactly. You got it right, there you go. Holly says, amen, thank you so much. Corny Cobb says, amen. All right, this will be our last question of the evening. Question, please, yes. I've been sick for the last 20 years from chemo poisoning. I can't drive ATM. I look good, smart, funny, but have those disabilities or liabilities. If I wait till healthy, I may be too old, help. 20 years of chemo poisoning, at what point will you become healthy? I don't understand, 20 years of chemo poisoning. Well, here's the thing. This is the tough part because you have to balance between, is it takes time to fall in love with someone. Maybe a person who's in love with you can be able to accept those liabilities as you chose it, but I highly doubt someone who's a total stranger is gonna accept it or welcome it in. So it's better off that you meet in friendship-based capacities and then maybe share that with someone before you begin a romantic capacity. That would be my invitation. Develop a friendship with people, not from a dating. Don't be dating. Develop friendships, share. And if someone from that capacity says, I've no issue with it, that's probably your best bet. I think from a dating, I think realistically speaking, 999 men out of 1,000 probably won't want to engage.  So it's the same for you. You wouldn't want to engage. Most women would not want to start dating someone who had health issues right from the get-go. It's not fair. I'm not saying it's fair. I'm just saying what is. So try a different strategy. Do things with men in a friendship-based capacity. Start interacting with men, whether it's in social circles or whatnot, because this is how you build some level of familiarity and trust with someone. And then their most more apt to accept the health conditions. And again, I don't know how it manifests in how you live your life or how it would affect the relationship, but that's just a rough guess of how I would approach it. So Lisa, again, thank you so much for that question. And I'm giving you a big, gigantic Jonathan Bear hug on that one. Okay, this will be the last question of the night. Question, pardon me if it's too personal, but I'm going to ask anyway, what worked and did not work about your last relationship with a woman? With the woman I was with? You know, if I'm being really honest with myself, the reason why it didn't work is I wasn't in my empowerment in that relationship. And so because of that, I was more like a little child, not in the way I acted, but I just wasn't in a really good place in my life when I met her. So I probably stayed in the relationship a lot longer because we were misaligned. Our sense of humor was different. A lot of things that are out of respect for her, I'm not going to share publicly, but we were misaligned in a lot of areas. But because I was such a weak place in my life, and we met in the playground, she was a personal, she was a therapist and we met in the playground of human behavior. We loved human behavior. And thankfully through her, I met a great community of friends who I'm still very close to. One of them just texted me while we were talking or while I've been talking to you all. So so many blessings came out of the relationship, but I wasn't in my empowerment as I am in today. I would say that's them. And with respects to her issues, I'm not here to throw her under the bus. She had her issues. I had my issues and we had a nice journey and we're still very friendly to one another. I'm probably going to see her next week when I'm up in her hood, which is about 50 miles from me. I'm going to stop by and see her and her boyfriend, David, or her partner, I should say David. So, but I can't go into the particulars because that wouldn't be fair to her. All right, folks. Wow. All right. Lisa says, I'm tech permanently disabled going to go through a detox. Okay, that's good. All right, folks. I think this would be a great place to wrap up. So for those more red flag phrases, just a reminder, I love you. This is, again, if it's said in the early stage of dating, I've never experienced like this before. You're the only one for me. That's the best sex I ever had. That's usually luster limerence talking. My wife and I haven't had sex in a while. Sorry, I left my credit cards and wallet at home. Can you send me a sexy lingerie pick and I've got to work late tonight? He's always busy. Those are just some phrases that might want to give you pause. And again, we're going to be doing more of these more red flag phrases over the next few weeks. I hope you found value. Please post a comment below if this resonated with you. Check out the link to a free discovery call with me to see if working with a coach is right for you. Check out my membership group if you can't afford coaching called Midlife Love Mastery. Follow me on Instagram and just, if you want to connect with me, again, find me on Facebook as well. At least follow my page. All right, I'm going to wrap up this video as I always do.  I'm going to reach into the camera and give you a hug of love if that's okay. I'm going to ask you to turn to someone, a pat, a teddy bear pillow and give Iter them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love. Now let's face it, we could all use more love in our lives. I want to thank Holly and Corny Cobb and Kit Kat, Kitty Kat, Marianne, Lisa, Crafty Laurie, Brenda, Jewel, Avet, Mel, Sandra, Brenda, Nurse Nessie, Heather, how are you doing, sweetheart? Jill, Miller, let's see, Sophia, Gail, Embey, and Kimberly, and Lisa, I think I said all those. Wishing you a super duper wonderful, fantastic evening. Bye now, bye-bye. This resonates with you. Did you find value? Please let me know and purchase a super sticker before we wrap up. All right.