Hollywood, California, Monday, July 27th. Bromance Home on Hollywood Boulevard. The Lux Radio Theater presents Joan Crawford and Franchotone in Chain. Present Hollywood. Tonight, the makers of Lux Toilets, the beauty care used by nine out of ten screen stars and by attractive women everywhere, brings you another assemblage of Hollywood's most distinguished citizens. Joan Crawford, Franchotone, Gilbert Emory, Cecil B. DeMille, Oliver Hinsdale, Helen Burgess, Louis Silvers, and many others. We are also proud to welcome, as members of our audience, a score of celebrated personalities. Among them, Patsy Ruth Miller, Paula Stone, John McGuire, John Lee Mayan, who adapted tonight's play for the screen, Lena Basquette, Mary Alice Rice, and Rady Harris, celebrated New York columnist. To all of you, greetings from Lux. No man in motion pictures holds a record of achievement more enviable than that of our eminent director. He brings to radio just as he is brought to the screen the greatest plays and players in the world of entertainment. Tonight, he comes to the theater direct from location, dressed in riding breeches and boots and covered with the dust of the set. And here he is, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Cecil B. DeMille. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Many paths cross and many double-cross in Hollywood. But this is my first professional contact with Joan Crawford and Francho Tone. But I know their history, perhaps better than they do. I can trace it back 150 years. Their romance, which began in 1933, was more than a courtship. It was a coincidence which had its beginnings in 1798, when an undersized Cossacken named Bonaparte was lighting the fuse that was to explode all Europe. And an Irish patriot named Wolf Tone was enlisting French aid in a revolt against England. The sympathies of the French people were with Tone, the handsome Irish rebel. But like most Irish rebellions, his was a glorious failure. He merely laid the groundwork for mutual admiration between the French and Irish. And Francho Tone, a descendant, and Lucille Le Sir, a little French girl, took it up from there. You may never have heard of Lucille. Her first job was at the Kansas City Department Store. After that, she danced in a Broadway chorus and finally came to Hollywood from a winter garden show in New York. A magazine asked its readers to suggest a new name for her. And from the name submitted, the studio chose Joan Crawford. Today, more than 200 babies whose last name range from Ginsburg to McKillacuddy are called Joan Crawford. Which will give you some idea of the star's popularity. To all the world, she symbolizes the American viewpoint in clothes and manner. And tonight, the Luxe Radio Theater presents Chained, starring Joan Crawford and Francho Tone. Tonight, Miss Crawford plays the part of Diane Lovering, indispensable secretary of a middle-aged but attractive steamship magnet, Richard Field, who is deeply in love with her. Francho Tone is Michael Bradley, young owner of a ranch in the Argentine. The curtain rises on Field's private office in the Empire State Building. We hear him talking briskly on an inter-office telephone. Hello, Norris. Yes? Mr. Field talking. I have decided to start the Caribbean on the coastal run out of Savannah. That'll put the Southern Cross on the real Buenos Aires run until next December, starting now. She can sail Friday. Now, what about the Lloyd matter? Lloyd matter? Well, listen, that's got to be handled with kid gloves. It'll take maybe six weeks. But I'm not leaving this office until it's settled right our way. Okay, Norris, goodbye. Who is it? Diane, it's you. Darling, I've just been through the Spanish Inquisition and I came out alive. What did they say? All doctors put me through the third degree, fluoroscope, metabolism, blood pressure, x-rays. The whole works. I felt like a murdered corpse being dissected by the Department of Justice. Yes, but what did they say? What's the verdict? Organically, sound is a dollar. Healthy as a young cold. They claim I'm just run down there, so exhausted. They ordered me to take a long rest. Can you imagine my resting until the Lloyd affair is finished? Yes, I can, young lady. If I say so. Now listen, boss. Mr. Boss. Boss, darling, you're a strong man and you set a terrific pace, but I've got plenty of reserved power. We're going to finish that Lloyd deal together. Diane, come here. Do you think I'm going to let you risk your health just for a business deal? After all we've been through together, now that we both realize how much we mean to each other. Oh, you do love me, don't you? How could I help it? Oh, Diane. I keep asking myself, am I worthy of Richard Field, all the love and bigness that's in his heart?  So I guess I must be. I keep asking myself, how can an old man like me... Careful.  All right, I'm a mere stripling of 46. Look here. What about this sudden command appearance? Anything wrong? Diane, it's happened. You mean your wife? Yes. Oh. She came into my room last night. She was very fine. No scene or anything like that. She simply told me that she knew about us and had known for some time, in fact. She wanted to know what I was going to do. Did you tell her? I told her the truth, that there was nothing between you and me, just that we loved each other. I tried to make her understand what a really fine person you are. I don't know how successful I was. And then? I asked her for a divorce. Darling? She... She wouldn't give it to me. She said she doesn't believe in divorce. I even offered to let her keep the children. Oh, Richard, you can't. You can't give up everything. I would. For you. It's no use. Oh, Richard. Diane, come here. No, please. There's only one thing to do now. Don't say it. Don't even think it. We can't go on that after this. We can. And we will. We've got nothing to be ashamed of. And let's not give up hope that someday she'll give me my freedom. But how can... You know what you're going to do? No. Southern Cross. Sales Friday. We're born as Alice. You're going aboard her.  You need a rest. It'll help you to forget. This had to come. It's a little too nearest for the moment, but it's only temporary. And when you come back, everything will be just as before. Will it? Well, but you love me, don't you? Oh, yes, Richard.  You haven't got much time. Boat sales at 5.30 Friday. Lovely boat. I wish you were going long too. I won't know so long, boy. It'll be only six weeks. Besides, I have to give you a chance to know your own mind, haven't I? It isn't my mind anymore, darling. It's yours. Judd, where's the ambassador suite? This way, Miss Field. There you are. When we take the Southern Cross together, it'll be called the bridal suite. Oh, Richard, look at those flowers. You shouldn't have. Well, they knew you were coming and grew overnight. Judd? Yes, sir? Mind now, Miss Lovering asked for a water spot. You can get it for her. Yes, sir. Oh, here's the chef, sir. Oh, Mr. Field, you want Emil? Emil? This is Miss Lovering. She likes crepes rosette and thinner than you've ever made them before. And I know she'd like to pump an over that sauce. And corned beef hash, too, Emil. Perfection, Mr. Field. And if you don't outdo yourself, I'll have you transferred to a banana boat. And I will deserve it, Mr. Field. Now here's your bedroom, Diane. It's beautiful. And still, not enough. Oh, it's taking all the willpower I've got not to chuck the whole Lloyd deal and come along with you. You will come back, won't you? I promise, Richard. I'll need you always. I think I'd crack up without you now. Oh, dear, we won't have time for our cocktail. The minute the ship leaves, you go to the bar and order one. Only a sharing flip, remember? Always a sharing flip. Every day at six o'clock. I'll have one, sure. I'll think of you, Richard. Goodbye, darling. A sharing flip, please. Yes, madam.  There I go, giving it all ready. Oh, say, aren't you the young lady who always orders chicken salad? We've met before, aren't we? No. My name is John Smith. Crane, how are you and who are you? No. Yes, please. Please, no. Ah, pretty please. With sugar on it? I want to be left alone, Mr. Rod. Smith, it's a hard name to remember, and I can take a hint. I'm off to the rest for dinner, and you'll be sorry when I'm gone. I won't even know it. Who is it? It's Johnny Smith, your faithful servant. Where have you been? In the bar. Now, come on, drop all that housework and come with me and see what I found. She's gorgeous. Congratulations, Mr. Smith. Ah, no, no, they're not in order, Mr. Bradley. She was a little distant, I take it. Straight from the Arctic regions. Is she worth an expedition? From pole to pole. Don't stop to get dressed. We'll start now. Lead on, guide. There she is, over there. You mean the one sitting alone at the table? Yeah, and believe it or not, drinking this sherry flip. Can I pick them or can I pick them? Sometimes I actually have faith in you again, Johnny. Uh-oh, I warned you. She's as cold as a sea lion's nose. Then the first thing for you to do is go over and apologize for your behavior. For me? I should say not it'd make me look weak. You don't understand tactics. It clears the decks for future action. Go ahead, I'll be over in a minute to help you out. All right, okay, Master, I obey. Charming lady, after thinking over my rudeness, I've come to say that... I thought you didn't leave after all. Oh, but yes, I've been gone half an hour. I hadn't noticed. Hot down, fly. I've been watching you, my friend.  Why, you... No back talk now. I know you're tight, my man.  Well, listen, you...   Oh, you! Hey, Miss, whatever your name is, this fella... Do it! Find out where there's octopus bunks and lock them up till he's sober. Yes, sir. No, please, so come on. Hey, wait a minute. Let's go. Call me, will you? Hey, wait a minute. Thank you. I suppose he's really harmless. Allow me. An Irish aunt will name me Mike Bradley. Well, good for him. Thank you again, Mr. Bradley. Look here. You've been nervous. Probably all unstrung over this attack on your privacy. How about another cocktail? Thank you, no. I've had my one for the evening. Well, I'll, uh... I'll see you at dinner. I'm having dinner in my cabin. I'm turning in early. Then I'll see you around tomorrow at the swimming pool. Perhaps, if I decide to go in. Can't you keep on your own side of the pool? I'm not chasing you. I just turned up like an old cantaloupe rhyme. The ocean is full of them. Hey, wait! Wait! Maybe I'm the door-to-door brush man. Not today. Special offer. Full set of kitchen brushes and a set of Charles Dickens. I haven't got a kitchen. How about a set of Dickens without the brushes? I couldn't afford it. You see, it's a contest, man. The one that sells the most brushes gets sent away on a vacation. And the more you sell the farther they send you? That's right. That's what comes at trying to swallow the whole pool. Here, let me slap you on the back. Oh, that's enough unhand me.  Oh, stop it. Even when they're bloodshot. Will you tell me what this is all about? I don't know, but isn't it fun? Yes. Now look at me, really. I'm not such a boogie man, am I? Just an honest, open face. A little too open, maybe. When are you leading this boat, Mr. Bradley? Going all the way to Buenos Aires. How far do you go? All the way to Buenos Aires. This is a great diner. Diner? Yes, I know. The passenger list called you Diane Lovering, but I called you Diner. In Heaven's name, what? I had a black-faced doll when I was about a year and a half old. It called her Diner. I loved her very dearly. Couldn't go to sleep unless I had her safely tucked away in a shoe box. I'm afraid I don't see the comparison. Isn't any except Diane reminds me of Diner, that's all. Oh. See, there you go getting panicky again. I'm out for last, Diner, that's all. Good. And you'd look pretty silly in a shoe box, anyway. Very silly. And I'm not a year and a half old anymore. Would it be forward of me to invite you to have a cocktail with me? Sorry, but I'm going to bed at six o'clock. Without your dinner? I'm having a scent to my cabin. Okay, then I'll meet you in the bar at six, and we'll have dinner afterwards. Only a quarter of six. And I've got 15 minutes to get back to my cabin. How about just one cocktail? Well, I'll have a Sherry Flip. Sherry Flip? What's the matter, you see signal? No, not the least. Sherry Flips is like water, no tang, no feeling, no roof to it. I still like Sherry Flips. Okay, lady. I'll show you I can take punishment, too. Oh, Stuart, one Sherry Flip and a plain lemonade. Yes, sir, right away, sir.  What makes you think so? Well, you're a problem to me.  What did you come on this trip for? The ride? Mm-hmm. Dawn, long ride. I wanted a long ride. Who's the guy? What guy? Well, every now and then your eyes are way out there on the horizon. There must be a guy behind a woman's eyes when they're like that. Will you listen to the conceited male? Honest now, you're not engaged to be married? Would that be one of my problems? Might be. Have you been engaged? No.  Don't you remember? It was a shoebox. A lemonade for the lady? Do I look as if I drink a Sherry Flip? A storager. Well, here's to the tour. This is long may we wait. You came on this boat looking for trouble, didn't you, Mr. Bradley? I admit it. But then you dropped out of the sky. But I'm not trouble. I know. And I just about decided that you're something distinctly different. Something I've always wanted to meet. And always thought was just a kid's foolish dream. I'm afraid you're on the edge of saying something very silly, Mr. Bradley. It doesn't seem silly. Then I've never been this close to the edge before. Then let's forget you ever said it, shall we? All right. Until the day I can make you remember it.  Do you like to walk? Listen young lady, I'll walk you around the deck tomorrow until you holler for help. Okay. Twenty times around so far. How are you holding out? I haven't even started. Then let's go a little faster. What for? Because there are a couple of long-legged old school moms that look as if they want to race us. Oh, good morning. Miss Weebles and I have just about decided that you two set the nicest pace on the deck. We like to walk there. So do we. I think we make a nice little squad, you might say. We all have to do this every morning. Yeah? Yeah? Good idea. You just keep leading the way and we'll follow. Hey, what do we do? Go a fast one. You do it. I'm all out of that. All right. Here goes. Oh, look at the whales. Whales? Right alongside the ship, there must be a hundred of them. I don't see any. No? There aren't any whales there, Mr. Bradley. I'm afraid you're mistaken. No. No whales? Are you sure? Not a whale. Nothing but ocean. Gosh, you don't suppose...not again. There's them. My poor dear Mr. Bradley. What's the matter with him? Nothing, you see. They told me a sea voyage would cure me. I won't go back to that place again. They can't tie me up in that room. You see, it worked. That's what I call practical insanity. See you all, we see whales. Only when being followed by long-legged school moms. Sometimes I see the southern cross. Really? If you'll come on the upper deck with me some night, I'll show it to you. Only you'll see it too. Will that mean we're both insane? I'm afraid that's too much to hope for. It's glorious. Where's the southern cross? Right up there. Where? There. Right along the line of my finger. Oh, oh, I see. Oh, how beautiful. You're telling me. We're looking at the southern cross, Mr. Bradley. You speak for yourself. I'm going to do all the looking at you I can our last night on board ship. Are you coming out to my ranch in Buenos Aires? I...I'm afraid I won't have time. I've only two days and I've some shopping and things to do. Where are you stopping? Uh, with some friends. Who are they? The, uh, the Wilson's. The Wilson's? I've never heard of them. I've lived there ten years and know everybody in town. Take another name. No, no, really. They moved down last winter. Now look here, Dinah. What's behind all this? Are you still scared of me? Why should I be scared of you, Mr. Bradley? I asked you, Dinah. Oh, it's all wrong. We weren't meant to end this way. We weren't ever meant for anything else. Goodbye, Mike Bradley. I'll think of you often and good luck. All right. So long, Dinah. Just the same old thing. Shipboard friends and never see each other again, right? Right. I don't believe it. Over too much. I don't believe it. So long, Dinah. In just a moment we'll go on with our Lux Radio Theatre presentation of Change. Starring Joan Crawford and Franchotone. But first we take you to Hollywood's playground, Santa Monica Beach. Only 14 miles down lovely Wilshire Boulevard from Hollywood to the sea. We're on the set at famous Santa Monica Beach Club. There are two girls near us, very much excited. Listen. Look, it's Carol Lombard. There? No, over there to the right.  Swim beautifully. Doesn't she look slick in that bathing suit? Mm-hmm. Some low-cut. Wish I could wear one like that. But my back isn't smooth enough. Say, I read in a movie magazine that Carol Lombard uses Lux Toilet soap as a bath soap, too. Gosh, that's an ideal, all right, huh? Mm-hmm. It's dollars to donuts. That's why her back is so smooth. I'll have to give it a try. It certainly is Carol Lombard's Lux Toilet soap care that keeps her skin so lovely. And this beauty bath does other things, too. Carol Lombard herself has told us. Often I come home from a long day before the camera. So tired, I can't bear even the thought of going out. And then I try a Lux Toilet soap bath. Lie back a few moments, completely relaxed. When I step out, I feel marvelously refreshed. And I love the delicate perfume Lux Toilet soap gives my skin. Lux Toilet soap has an active lather that carries away from the pores all foreign matter, every trace of dust and dirt. It protects stintiness. Lux Toilet soap's perfume is a blend of 34 costly scents. But because so many millions of cakes are sold, the cost of this fine soap is brought way down so that any girl shopping list can contain the words six cakes of Lux Toilet soap, please. And once again, Mr. DeMille. Chained, starring Joan Crawford and Franchotone, continues. It's the following morning, and Diane thinks she has escaped from Mike by telling him she's visiting the Wilson's, some non-existent friends. Outside her luxurious hotel, she waits for a groom to bring the horse she's ordered for a morning ride. Miss Louvering. Yes? I am Mr. Partos, assistant manager of the hotel. There has been a slight delay about your horse. I shall phone the stables again. Thank you, Mr. Partos. Madam has been made comfortable, I hope. Oh, perfectly. The flowers in my room are gorgeous. Mr. Field ordered them for you every day, madam. Oh, did he? Oh, Mr. Partos, I shall want a guide today. Someone who knows the city. I have already arranged for the guide, madam. Can he speak English? But, see, senorita, I was speaking to English for 25 years. Allow me, senorita, to present myself. Send your Pancho Mike Bradley at your servant. Mike, where did you bob up from? You scared me.  No, but how did you happen to be here? Well, I thought I'd drop around and say hello to the Wilson's. Nice little cottage they have here. Lots of servants, guests. Are they home? No, but they left words for me to man the children. I was taking the twins to see the executions on the plaza. Little Otis is tall for his age, isn't he? Oh, do they have him stretched? Mike, are you a bloodhounder? Is this just accident? I'm a bloodhounder who can read trunk checks when a lady carelessly leaves a trunk outside her stateroom. Besides, Mr. Partos here is a friend of mine. He owes me money. Oh, so he told you I was going riding at 10 o'clock. Exactly. So I thought you'd like to ride out on a Bradley ranch for horses or horses, not candidates for the bullring. I'd love to, Mike. That's better than I hope. Let's go. Let's get off and rest a while. I brought a couple of thermos bottles of cold tea in my saddlebag. He? On shipboard, lemonade, and sherry flips. On the Pampas cold tea. I forgot to ask the name of my horse. Chili con carne. I'm glad to meet you, chili. Hey, you've got a cold wet nose. Tell her she shouldn't smell so nice, chili. Where do we hitch them to a blade of grass?  He'll stand like a sentinel. Nothing like cold tea on a warm day on the Pampas.  Yes. Are you going to chili, horses? Not chili con carne. Chili's grandma once won the sweepstakes for me and saved the mortgage. Isn't it quiet out here? Not a human being or a house inside? Yes, quiet and harmless, like a day nursery. And you had to lie and run away from me. Why? I should think you could guess, Mike. Diane. No, please. Let me go, Mike. Oh, my darling. You see, there's nothing to run away from, isn't it? No. Just then, when you kissed me, you and I reached high above the earth. I don't know where, but we were all alone together where nobody else will ever be. We're going to settle down up there. Right in the sun, or we can feel it beating down into us. However you spell it, it's love. Whether it's sun, or moon, or rain. On the boat. Did you really know so soon? I've known about somebody like you ever since I could think. When did you know? I never thought about anybody like you. So I guess it must have been the minute I saw you. You're going to see me from now on, Mrs. Mike Bradley. Oh, Mike. Now I know that's what I wanted to hear you say. But I've never dared let myself think about it. What have you dared think about? Everything. Your arms around me. Everything except being Mrs. Bradley. Why? Because perhaps I'm that kind of a girl.  If that's so, I hope you won't want me to start in. No. I'm going to tell you about the present. There's no present except you and me. There's another man. I promise to marry him. That's the man I said was behind your eyes. Yes, but you don't see him there now, do you? No. And I've forgotten he was ever there. I can't just forget that way. I know. But I've never, never really known anything until you put your arms around me. You see, I thought I loved him, Mike. He's gentle, honest, dear. And I owe him everything. This trip. I even owe him you. Well, you've got to write him a letter right away. No. I've got to go back and tell him face to face. No. That's only an unnecessary ordeal. You wouldn't be fair if I didn't. You see, he didn't run out on me and I couldn't run out on him. If I see him myself, I can make him understand. We couldn't be happy any other way, could we, Mike? I suppose not. You've got to go back and tell him. But, Diane, darling, please hurry back. Here's your landing card. Thank you. Oh, my dear darling. How are you, Richard? Yeah, let me look at you. It's almost worth letting you go away just for this moment.  I've got the card outside. What about the custom? Oh, I've attended to all that. You've got the courtesy of the port. This way, darling. Sometimes I had a strange, terrible feeling that you wouldn't come back. Well, did you have a good time? Yes. Nice crowd on the boat? What? Yes. You're tired, aren't you? No. Maybe a little excited about getting back. Well, I've so many things to tell you, I don't know where to begin. Considering that I'm never going to let you out of my sight again, you have the rest of your life to tell me everything. But, Richard, I want to tell you something, Will. I don't want to hear a thing. Not until you see what I've got for you. What is it? Here. Did you welcome the home present? If you're wedding ring. Take a look this morning's paper and see what you think. Listen. Shipping magnetic divorce. Mrs. Richard Ifield, wife of field-lined head, now in Reno. Oh, no. No, Richard. True, dear. We had it all out shortly after you left. She saw that it was the only way. You can't do this. Oh, but it's all right. She recognizes that there's nothing between her and me anymore. She's an honest person, Diane. So it's all settled. Darling, we can be together always, now. Always? Well, what's the matter? Don't you believe it, dear? It's just something I never counted on. One time, I never even dared to hope for it.  You must love me very much. Your being away showed me I love you more than I ever knew. Every hour empty. I couldn't do a thing downtown just wondering about you and what you were doing, waiting for you to come back. Am I really that much of your world?  If I ever lost you now, I'd... Well, we don't even think of that. No. We mustn't think about that ever again. No. What was it? Do you want to tell me? Nothing. Nothing important. Richard. Yes, dear? When... when are we going to be married?  See, senor? Is there anything fine? Hey, Johnny. Yes. May I come in yet? Yes, sure. It's a letter from New York in small, feminine handwriting. You know what looks awfully thin to me?  It's her first letter. Mike, what's the matter? Nothing very much. No, really nothing at all. There was a first-class chump in the Argentine. His name's Mike Bradley. You mean... I mean, no, it works. She's taken a run-out powder. She's married that guy in New York. Oh, gee, that... that's tough, Mike. It looks like all women are the same, doesn't it? Yeah. Only most of Monser Franken admitting they're only out to make a sap out of a man. I never dreamed it about her. It's brutal. Sure, everything seems brutal when you're on the loser's end of it. But I guess I'm well out of that one. Oh, how does a dame like that figure things anyway? Can't she recognize a real guy when she sees one? That's not that point. She's got what she wants. She'll live up there in New York, spending her days buying furs and diamonds to show off in the evening at nightclubs. Probably her husband's a good guy, too. Just another sap. Only he doesn't know it yet. Is there... Is there anything I can do about it, fella? Sure.  Love them and leave them. Calling Mrs. Fields. We haven't seen you since you and Mr. Fields returned from your honeymoon. No, we've been on Long Island this fall, but we'll be in town all winter. Anything I can do for you, Mrs. Fields? I'm looking for a pair of skis. It's Field and I are going to Lake Placid for a couple of weeks. You'll find them on the third floor, Mrs. Fields. Take the elevator straight ahead. Excuse me. Where's your gun department? I want to buy a ride for a second. Mike. Thanks. Mike. Well, hello. Fancy meeting you in your own hometown. How are you, Diane? This is a surprise. Yes. How long have you been in New York? I don't know. Two or three weeks. Where are you stopping? At the Westmoreland. I'm my car outside. Can I drop you anywhere? No, thanks. I think I'll walk. All right. How's Johnny? Been well and happy? Sure. You look pretty well. I can't complain. I'm glad, Mike. Well, what are you doing? Buying a store out? No. No, just window shopping. I'm afraid I've got to run along. I'm supposed to be at the club's avoid for luncheon. Well, Diane, keep up the good luck. And I'll tell Johnny I saw you. Mike, can't... Couldn't we go someplace and talk? Sure. Providing you can break that date and have lunch with me. That's all right. Providing you'll let me pick the place. Anywhere you say, Mike. I guess that's fair enough, isn't it? Oh, I'd do someone to talk to you. Sure. I know I need a little joint just about a block away from here. The luncheon, it was satisfactory, Monsieur. Excellent, Felix. And I like your little private dining room. A nice, intimate feature that New York should have borrowed from Paris long ago. Quite so, Monsieur. Quiet then, as you say, intimate. Decor, madame? No, thank you. No? No, Mike. Anything in? No. Very good. Mrs. Field? First time you've called me back. Okay, it's the last. But while we're on it, how's it working out? Why, splendidly. For you and for him, both. Well, of course. That's fine. How's his health? Why, he... Do I really deserve that much, Mike? I'm sorry. If you felt that was below the belt, I didn't mean it. Skip it. Skip it? But I see you're still the same healthy girl, aren't you? Not a doctor's bill, not a dentist's appointment, not even... Not even the son. What, Mike? Don't you remember? We went a little balmy under at once. We were going to settle down in the Argentine for life or something. Mike. Well, that's out. I don't blame you. But we'd blame ourselves if we didn't take an hour or two of it, now that they've stopped the clock for us. You don't mean that, Mike. You can't mean it. What's the matter? Do you like to run away and be caught? Really, Mike, please. I've got to go. I don't know why I ever spoke to you.  That's why. Because you're only out for thrills, anyway. And I was once sap enough to take you seriously. No, Mike, no. Give me Diana. Diana. I've waited so long to hear you say that. Diana, why did you do it? What? Why did you write that letter and let me spend a year thinking of you as a... Well, I thought I owed you the truth, Mike. And like a poor, deafy kid, I believed it. But only because I was counting the days, I guess. No, Mike, really. It was true then, and it's true now. Only this is true.  Every second. Mike, there are lots of people, men and women who are, well, drawn to each other. Sort of a little spark that flashes up like a skyrocket every now and then. You're trying to turn the sun, our sun, into a firecracker? It can't be done, Diana. No, I guess it can't be done. So that changes everything. Nothing's changed, Mike. There's Richard, and there always shall be. Why? Why didn't you tell him? Well, I couldn't let him down there. He's turned his whole world, his whole life over to me. I can't ask him to take it back now. It would disappear, and he'd be alone. How about you? Me? What about us? Gran and Barrett. Oh, no. Now that I know, do you think I'll stand here? Please, Mike. This can only mean one thing first.  And I thought I'd rather have you hate me than love me. Now I know why I spoke to you today, because I hoped your eyes wouldn't be so hard. They were, but now they're not again. This is the only way I could think about them and go on, Mike. Diana, you must stay. No. Then I've got to see you again. Tomorrow? We're going away tomorrow night. I'll be busy. Where are you going? Goodbye, Mike. Mike, darling. Do you realize what you're doing? Yes. I'm keeping you locked in my heart where nobody else will ever be. Where only I can talk to you, without ever seeing you again. Listen for me in yours, Mike. Always. Identification. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System. The third act of change, starring Joan Crawford, as Diane Lovering and Franchotone, as Mike Bradley, will be heard shortly. For the first time in 25 years, I've broken an ironclad rule, and given an important role to a person who has never been before a camera. The exception to the rule is Helen Burgess. I noticed her in the studio restaurant, and saw what I thought was a distinct mark of genius. She had a contract with Paramount, but there was small chance of her ever appearing in an important part. And she had yet to see the inside of a studio soundstage. I gave her the very important role of Louisa Cody, Buffalo Bill's young wife and the Plainsman. I'm not going to prophesy whether or not she will be a great success. You can decide that when you see her. She comes to the stage of the Lux Radio Theatre, direct from the set, in costume and makeup. And her week's work with Miss Burgess has shown me that my confidence is justified. A little girl with a great talent, Helen Burgess. I'm so grateful, ladies and gentlemen, for this marvelous chance to work under Mr. DeMille's direction. It was a thrill to be the discoverer of someone new to the screen. It's much more of a thrill to be discovered. I'm sure that everyone in this audience wants to know something about you, Helen. And someone has said that there is nothing so interesting as a fact and nothing so vital as vital statistics. So what are yours? I was born in Portland, Oregon, and next year I'll be able to vote. I also lived in Tacoma, Washington for a while before coming to Hollywood. I went to Hollywood High School like B.P. Daniels and so many other DeMille discoveries. And one difference in your case is that you had never appeared on the screen at all. And most of the girls like B.P. Daniels and Gloria Swanson who finally found themselves in DeMille bathtubs were bathing beauties to start with. Well, I envied them whatever experience they'd had. And I walked out on the set for the first time and met Gary Cooper and Gene Arthur, Charles Bickford, James Ellison and the rest of the cast. I was so nervous my petticoats kept rustling. The man in charge of the microphone said it sounded just like a ton of coal going down to shoot. Don't ever fear being nervous, my dear. This is your first picture. It's my 63rd. I begin to get nervous a week before the starting date on every picture and don't get over it until a week after I finish. The first time I'm not nervous before starting a picture, it will probably be a bad one. Willie, it wasn't nearly so terrifying walking onto the set, though, as it was seeing our first day's work on the screen. I was so afraid I hadn't lived up to expectations I'd have run away but for Gary Cooper. Gary said, don't be scared. Hell, I'm as acting as a cinch.  I happen to know that just about then, Gary's knees were knocking together so hard they sounded like castanets. Well, the thing that makes me feel most of these is that everybody else in the cast is so much at home. Some of the players have been in every one of the 63 DeMille films. You will find that DeMille cast is not just a collection of players, it's a reunion. Well, I can think of only one bigger reunion in Hollywood. Get together all the picture stars who use lux toilet soap, and then you'd have a reunion. And there seems to be the same friendly spirit here in your lux radio theater, Mr. DeMille, and there is in your cast, which is probably why the show is as good as the soap. Good night. Good night, Starlet. We continue the lux radio theater play, Chains, starring Joan Crawford and Franchotone. It's the evening after Diane's unexpected meeting with Mike. She and her husband are at home, dressing for dinner. Diane. Yes, Richard? All packed to go to the league class tomorrow? Almost, but don't worry, Amy never forgets to sing. Good gosh, I'm hungry. What's for dinner? I really don't know. Aha, beginning to forget your wifely duties already, eh? Yes, I mean it won't happen again, Richard. Get your skis today? Skis? Oh, no, it's silly, I forgot all about them. So that's my girl with the efficient head for remembering. Been talking about skis all week and then goes and forgets them. I'll ask them to send some up by express. Are you all through at the office? All cleaned up. Good. Then you sleep late in the morning and stay around the house with me until we leave for the train. Can't, it's a board of governors meeting. Clubs, long salmon down, I've got to attend. Richard. Yeah. I've got a marvelous idea. Name it. Let's not wait for that stuffy train trip tomorrow night. Let's get to bed early, get up early. Take the open car and every fervor open the house and motor up. If we leave by seven, we can make classes by six in the evening, no matter how much snow. Mmm, pretty cold ride. Oh, we'll twist the cobwebs out of our brains.  You. I make you anxious? What's easy, you anyway. You've been talking in riddles ever since you came home today. Have I? Well, it's just that I want to be with you alone. Just us two together, away from the whole world. Oh, I can't explain what I mean. Why, Diane, I believe their tears in your eyes. Darling, I'm really touched. We can, motor up, can't we? I'll say we can. We'll run away from everybody in everything. Oh, thank you, Richard. Morning, James. Are we glad we're here, aren't we? It's very invigorating, sir. Is this field still out skiing? Yes, sir. Oh, sir, a gentleman flown by the name of Bradley. Bradley? Bradley? Do you know any, Bradley? Do you want me? Yes, sir. I told him I never disturbed you when he came downstairs, sir. Then he asked for Mrs. Field. I told him she was out. And then, before I could ascertain his business, he said he was coming right over. Right over? Where from? From the village, I presume, sir. Hmm. Ah. Kidnest you with this your noble idea, James? Mrs. Field ordered it, sir. James, I'm a very fortunate man. Yes. If that's that fellow, Bradley, show him right in. Yes. I'm Michael Bradley. Is Mr. Field in? Yes, this way, sir. Mr. Field is expecting you, sir. Mr. Field? Yeah. Mr. Bradley? Yes. Well, you look fresh in civilization. Came up on the night train. Sit down, won't you? Excuse me, I'll go right on with my breakfast. All right, James. By the way, Mr. Bradley, have you had yours? Thanks. I think you'd rather this would be private, Mr. Field. Well, I... Well, very well. James, I'll call you when I want to. Yes. Mr. Field, there's only one reason I felt I could come up here to see you.  My what? Oh, you know, Mr. Field. I'm in love with her. What? And she's in love with me. Are you insane? No. I met her on the boat last year. It was in the car, Mr. Field. Only I couldn't get her to admit it. Until one day she came up to my ranch. And then I knew we both knew. What is this? Some filthy, blackmailing situation that... Oh, no. Even then she was loyal to you. If you've got anything else on your mind, forget it, because it isn't so. But you see, she came back to tell you about me only. She found out how much she meant to you and she couldn't let you down. Well, I guess that about settles the matter, doesn't it? No, it can only be settled one way. Her way, which she's too unselfish to face. So I'm trying to face it for her.  Now, from it. When I called your office and learned you'd left for the Adirondacks earlier than you expected, I simply knew she'd run away from me. Bradley, you're kidding yourself. No, I'm not. You're in as good a position as I am to know a man can't kill himself about a woman. I think this talk is finished, Mr. Bradley. Not yet. Diane came through for you, didn't she? And now it's your turn to come through for somebody else. And what do you propose that I should do about it? Give her up. Give her back to herself. Oh, I know, I'm getting the breaks, but there's nothing I can do to keep them on your side. And I know it's tough, but there's nothing you can do. I could drop out of sight and it wouldn't solve matters. Only a miracle in blood and body could change this picture field and neither you nor I believe in miracles. Get out of here. Now, wait a minute, Mr. Field. Get out of here! All right, then, get this. I'll take her away from you. I never tried, but I can, and now I will. Right past divorce courts and marriage certificates and all the rest of it. And we'll be more openly and honestly and completely together than all the...  Well, Richard, what's the matter? Mine. Diane, you love this man? No, Richard. Diane, he said he could take you away if he wanted to. Is it true? No, he couldn't. Diane, look at me. You had no right to do this. I told you, this is my husband. Everything to me, everything.  Can't you see what you're doing? No, Diana. I think she's decided. No, she hasn't. All right, then I'll decide. Richard, put down that gun. Diane, get out of the way. Put down that gun, Richard. No, you can't. It's Mike. It's Mike. I knew, Diana. I knew it's Mike. I just wanted to be sure. What are you going to do? Do you, my dear? We're going to settle this now that I like civilized people. Richard, I... It's all right, dear. I understand. I think Mr. Bradley understands, too. I'm afraid I don't. When are you saving back the Argentine, Mr. Bradley? I have thought next week, perhaps, next week. That doesn't allow you much time, Diane. What do you mean? I mean that you'll be saving, too, my dear. Oh, Richard, I... I can't say anything. You aren't supposed to. And you're not to feel sorry for me. You've given me two years, Diane. Two glorious years. I'm grateful for them. Oh, please don't. Diane, please. I said you were not to feel sorry. You seem to have the same old problem. Youth versus wealth, shall I say, middle-aged. You have your youth, Diane. I want you to have it. Just marry in your love with Mike. I don't deserve this. Oh, yes, you do, Mike. You deserve anything. Anything that'll make her happy. Mike, it's glorious out here. You want to go on? No, let's just stay here. I want to drink it all in. The moonlight, the campus. There's a southern cross up there. Where? Just about where it used to be. Oh, it's more wonderful than ever. And so are you, Mrs. Mike Bradley. The chains are broken. And our play comes to its close. But Joan Crawford and Franchotone will be back in a moment for a curtain speech. Two-and-a-half million letters and postcards from movie fans are received at the studios each year. The bulk of this mail is addressed to the stars and asked the same question, how can I get into the movies? Tonight, that question will be answered by the dramatic coach of Metro-Goldman Mayor Studios, formerly director of the famous little theater of Dallas, Texas. He probably interviews more candidates for stardom than any man in Hollywood. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Oliver Hinsdell. Well, Mr. DeMille, I think that's... that even you must admit that that's a pretty big order. For of course, in this case, how can I get into the movies means how can I act in the movies? Acting is an art, and an art of any kind is a hard task master. There's no formula, no open sesame into this land of make-believe. Save that of work, work, work. Believe me. There is... there is, in addition to this prime requisite of work, the requisite and requirements of imagination, idealism, sincerity, a knowledge of life, true love of mankind, and a good appearance. These requirements are so essential and so seldom found in one person that when I came to Metro-Goldman Mayor, they told me that they would be well satisfied if I found even one promising actor. In five years, well, we've been perhaps a little more fortunate than that. One must have more than a love for acting. He must be willing to leave all for it, even to go without food for it, to think and to live nothing but theater. It's not merely a place to show off a good voice, a good profile, a fine figure. We must be careful, lest our urge for the art of the theater is not confused with the desire for self-exploitation. When we have reached the stage in our thinking that we ask nothing of the theater but are willing to give all to it, then we may know that the urge is real and cannot and will not be denied. There's no one key that will open the gates, but a combination will perhaps find that combination and you will enter. But once in, the real work only just begins. Here are a few of the combination numbers. So to speak, the aspirant must have a broad vision and understanding, a cultivated mind. He should know history, literature, painting, sculpture, music. He should know his Bible. His body must be healthy, active, and must respond to his bidding. A fine clear complexion which denotes health, vigor, vitality. And there is no better way to a clear complexion than a clear skin. And I know of no better way to a clear skin than by the use of pure toilet soap. Lux toilet soap, for instance. You do not need to be beautiful. Marie Dressler and Wally Beeray never won beauty contest. If you are beautiful, don't be misled into thinking that that's all that it requires to get into the movies.  I've tested at least a hundred thousand young men and women for their screen, including those that I've judged from photographs and written reports. These only 17 have made the grade. Among them are Jean Parker, Robert Taylor, Irene Hervé, Martha Sleeper, Marika Lyle, Robert Young, Betty Furness, Michael Whalen, Virginia Bruce. Some of the others are already equally well known, others you may never hear of. If you are still determined to go into pictures, take whatever opportunity you can get. Go to the little theaters or any amateur group in your neighborhood. Start in, if necessary, by sweeping the floors, paint scenery, understudy, be a prompter, do anything, and don't worry. If you think perhaps that I have painted a dismal picture, bear in mind that every major studio spends thousands of dollars yearly scouting the country for promising performers. We always need talent. Your big chance will come when you are ready to accept it and only then. Good luck and good night. Before the movies discovered glamour, it was just an old scotch word meaning a spell cast by magic. But a good two-word definition of the term today would be Joan Crawford. She is, of course, one of the best-dressed women in Hollywood, and I seem to have contributed to our leadership in style because I discovered her designer, Adrian. In fact, Adrian asked me to look at the first gown he designed for her. I agreed and waited for her to come to my office. After a while, there was a knock at the door. I said, come in, Joan. The door opened. Joan took one look at me and fled, apparently in terror. I didn't know until this week why she ran away and think the reason is one she'd better explain to you herself. Miss Joan Crawford. To tell the truth, I was scared to death of Mr. DeMille. I had visions of entering a room in complete darkness and suddenly finding myself underneath a blinding spotlight with Mr. DeMille seated on a throne and shouting, it won't do. The shock of finding your human being was too much. I had to run. It was something when beautiful women run from you like they do from hop or marks. But no need to apologize, Joan. Your performance tonight makes up for everything. My congratulations to you also, Frencho. It's been great playing on a program that Joan and I listened to so often, CB. And I'd like to congratulate you on the way you speak.  And I speak an entirely different language on the set. Out there, Jenny isn't a girl's name. It's an electrical generator. A high hat isn't something you wear. It's a camera stand. A lily isn't a flower. It's a good take or scene. I once asked a new assistant director to rush a lot of babies on the set. In 10 minutes, he was back with about 50 children. And what I wanted was some spotlight. You learn more in pictures of the new language. For instance, Clark Gable learned to swim. When we were making chain, the script called for several swimming scenes. There was no stroke at the time, but I taught him how. And in return, he taught me how to shoot a gun. Personally, I'm a chess player. You can see where Joan gets her complexion, CB. Swimming, shooting. She's out of doors all the time. In just a minute, dear. If you were a little more observant, you'd know that Lux's toilet soap has lots to do with it. I've used Lux for years at home on the set and I even carry it with me when I go away. It's really wonderful. So that's the secret, is it? Here's another little secret, CB. No, won't you sing for us, Joan? No, Mr. DeMille. Joan? Hmm. Joan, whoever heard of saying no to Mr. DeMille. No. Millions of people just heard it. But I'll make up for it by announcing next week's show. Oh, thanks. Next week, Barbara Stanwick and Fred McMurray will be with you in the Lux Radio Theater. The play is Main Street, adapted from the famous novel by Sinclair Lewis. And with two such marvelous players, you can look forward to a really great program. My thanks to you all and good night. We'll be listening in next Monday. Good night, CB. Good night. Thank you, Miss Crawford and Mr. Tone. And lots of success to both of you in your new Metro Golden Mayor picture, The Gorgeous Hussie, soon to be released with Robert Taylor, Lionel Barrymore, Melvin Douglas, and James Stewart. Our cast tonight included Gilbert Emory, Wally Mayer, Lou Merrill, Frank Nelson, Margaret Seddon, Walter Soldering, and Leora Thatcher. Miss Crawford, Mr. Tone, and Mr. Hinsnow appeared through courtesy of MGM. Our play, Chained, was based on the MGM photo play of the same name, which starred Miss Crawford and Clark Gable. Mr. DeMille and Miss Burgess appeared through courtesy of Paramount. And Mr. Lewis Silver's 20th Century Fox, where he has just completed the musical arrangements for To Marry With Love. And now, Mr. DeMille. As Miss Crawford announced, our play next Monday night is Main Street. Starring Barbara Stanwyck and Fred McMurray, in this modern classic by Sinclair Lewis. Our sponsors, the makers of Lux Toilet Soap, join me in inviting you to be with us at that time to welcome Miss Stanwyck and Mr. McMurray. This is Cecil B. DeMille saying good night to you from Hollywood. Sing, baby, sing. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.


Right, so you have all these different colored pyramids of different shapes and sizes, and I had seen these pyramids at game stores in the past. There were millennium, and they were always, like, stupidly expensive for giant packs of them.  And I'm like, eh, whatever. You know, it's usually next to some, like, random dice games. Well, some games, usually it has, like, a whole ton of games in them, because they're the ice house pieces, or the lab's pyramids. That's what they're known as is ice house pieces, and there's all kinds of games you can play with them, and if you go online, you can download, like, these packages that are like these books that is like a hundred ice house games, right? All these games you can play with ice house pieces. They're just pawns to use to make games. Yeah, it's, you know, and the thing is, because they're pyramids, because they come in multiple colors in multiple sizes, there's a lot you can do with them, you know, and they stack. So the stacking factor adds even more that you can do with them. Scott, we should use them in Burning Wheel as our arta. You can do that. But anyway. This game that we played, you know, was called Zendo, right? And apparently, I don't know, I obviously only know one game that you can play with ice house pieces. I read all the other rules for a whole bunch of other games. I already am of the opinion, even after knowing the rules to zero other ice house games, that this is the best ice house game.  Right, but anyway, so to explain Zendo, I first got to explain Mastermind, right? So Mastermind is this game, it's really old. It's actually I think an American game, and it's a code breaking game. One person comes up with a code and the code is just colors in order. So the code could be like red, green, blue, yellow. Scott, it was invented in 1970 by Mordecai Merowitz in Israeli postmaster and telecommunications expert. Awesome. But it's based on an earlier game called Bulls and Cows. That's at least more than a century old. Thank you for reading Wikipedia. Uh huh. That's my job. Mastermind works is that one person puts the code in there and the other person is to figure out the code. So it's sort of a versus game. It's like, can you come up with a pattern that I can't figure out in some number of tries? It's one on one. And what you do is you make a guess. So you have a whole bunch of pieces and you put out a guess. And if your thing matches the other guy's thing, he's like, yeah, it matches. If it doesn't match, he's like, no, it doesn't match. And you got to keep trying. And based on the clues you get from his answers, right, you keep going. Like, you'll know that has two correct in that one and that one has one correct, which means that that one is definitely green in the second slot. So I used to play this game a lot as a kid. And now that I know game theory and I look back at it, it seems pretty solvable. And you know what? Just looking at Wikipedia, there are algorithms that you can just always solve it in six guesses. Right. Because it's trivially easy to solve it in some number of guesses because there's only, I think, four colors, right? But there's one, two, three. There's four slots and a number of colors. Right. But yeah, mathematically, it's like you can always get it four pegs, six colors. There is a six guess algorithm and a five guess algorithm. Wow. That's good. Anyway, so I played this game as a kid and we actually had mastermind for kids. And I got to say mastermind for kids. If you're going to buy a copy of mastermind, don't get the regular old boring mastermind. Get mastermind for kids because it is the same exact game. It is not modified in any way. It is abs.   What exactly is it called? Because I have a list here of all the variations and re-releases mastermind for kids. The reason to get mastermind for kids is because the same exact game, no, it only has three holes, not four, like real mastermind. No, I remember the one Wikipedia says you're wrong. My memory must be wrong. But I remember having four holes. I'm glad. Oh, I said the words Wikipedia says you're wrong and your immediate response was, well, my memory must be wrong. Not Wikipedia. Really? Some guy on the internet. I remember there being four colors. I'm going to look it up. Four holes. Anyway, the reason that I thought it was better if it is indeed the same game is because three holes. It has a style to it, right? It's not elephants and hippos and lions. That's right.  It's not with a gland. That's right.  It's not just boring colors. It's like animal monkey hippo, right? And it has a style to it.  This is why you like it. Look at this. Look at this game. Anyway. That's the version we had. I remember it having four holes. Scott, I got to read this to you because the five-guess algorithm is really simple. Yep. Create a set S of the remaining possibilities. Now there are only 1296 anyway. So pick anything, right? The first guess is AABB. Remove all possibilities from S that would not give the same score of colored and white pegs if they were the answer. For each possible guess that remains, not necessarily in S. Okay. So for each possible guess, calculate how many possibilities from S would be eliminated for each possible colored white score. This is not trivial to do in your brain. All right. So there is another algorithm. I'm not going to read the whole thing that you can do in your brain. That's the six guess. Yes. Six guesses in the brain. Five guesses if you're a rain man. Or a computer.  Oh yes. Oh yes. Anyway. I thought I was so clever. I thought my parents would be like, he's a genius. No. They were like, you must have cheated. My sister mind is the other guy picks something and it's like you, it's like 20 questions, right?  So Zendo is the same thing, but slightly different and way better. The way it works is this. One person is the game runner and they come up with something or they look in the book and pick something, right? And there's different levels of difficulty. That is the Buddha nature. Now there's this whole, you know, the guy who taught it to us and played it with us, there's this whole sort of meta game of people who run it a lot, aren't supposed to say, like, what constitutes the levels or anything and you kind of figure that out. Like, so the cone master will say something like, this is a level three. Yeah. They don't have to tell you what level difficulty it is or not, right? But anyway, so every cone has different properties, right? It has its size, it has its color, it has number of pips on the side of it, which corresponds to the size. It does. So a big one has three pips and a small one has one pip and a medium one is two pips. It can also be laying on its side, which means, and because the pyramid, even though it's laying on its side, it could be pointing in different directions. It could be not on the table if it is stacked on another pyramid. Yup. It could be pointing at a pyramid. It could be covered by a pyramid if one is stacked on top of it. It could be covered by two pyramids. It could be pointed at another pyramid that itself is not touching the table. So what happens is at the very beginning of the game, the game runner, the master, right, and everyone else is a student and the game runner is the master, decides on what is the Buddha nature. So the Buddha nature could be something like, at least one pyramid is green. So they would produce a set of pyramids in some configuration that is the Buddha nature, meaning there is at least one green pyramid in it, and they would put next to it a gem signifying that that set has the Buddha nature. Typically a white stone. Yes. Then they will produce another set using any number of pyramids in any configuration that does not have the Buddha nature. So in this example case, there would be no green pyramids in that set whatsoever. Then player one, and this is where it gets better than mastermind because you can have a lot of players guessing, right, in a round. Player one produces a set of pyramids and lays them out. And then he has two choices. You can either say student or master. If he says students, yeah, we'll do master first. If he says master, the master will then place a stone next to that set signifying whether that set does or does not have the Buddha nature. Now it's very the best way to play this is to kind of get in the theme a little bit and be very formal like master. Why is master does this set? Not even just people reading around the internet.  That's good. But anyway, then after doing so, right, because you would never, you could do before doing so, but there's no reason to because you can always get the free guess. You can use your guessing stone. How many guessing stones everyone gets? Everyone starts with, I believe, one or two. One or two. You have a guessing stone. There's rules online. If you use the guessing stone, you would guess at the Buddha nature. So if you put your guessing stone, you could say the Buddha nature is at least two greens or if and only if the number of blue pieces touching at least one green piece is odd. Yeah, it could be or the number of pips on all the pyramids combined is a prime number. Right?  And then, you know, what would happen is A, either you would win because you guessed correctly or B, the master would then produce a set of pyramids that is contradictory to the thing you just said. So either it is an example that breaks your rule but still gets a white stone because it has the Buddha nature or something that does not have the Buddha nature, but that perfectly meets your rule. Now this is why this game is so fascinating. You can't cheat as the master because that will become immediately apparent to the students because everything has to be consistent.  So it gets you out of that sort of fiddly wording problem because at its core, it's inductive reasoning. Right. So, you know, for example, let's say the Buddha nature was, you know, I don't know. There are no red pieces. There are no red pieces, right? And the other guy says there are only pieces that are blue, green, black or yellow, right? Well, obviously those are equivalent rules. Here's a more side long example. My guess for the there are no red pieces is there are no pyramids pointing at a red piece. That is an equivalent rule because how is the master going to refute that? There are no pyramids pointing at a red piece.   But if you fail at guessing, you lost your guessing stone and now you can't guess again. So if you figure out the answer and you don't have a guessing stone, you're fucked. So Scott, how does one get more guessing stones? Well, instead of choosing master, you choose students. So you produce your set for free at the beginning of your turn and you say students.   And guess, and it's a guess, every student guesses whether the, you know, set you just produced exhibits the Buddha nature or not. If they guess correctly, they receive a guessing stone. If they guess wrongly, they don't receive a guessing stone. But this can be a little dangerous because you're giving everyone else the opportunity. For example, say someone else is closer than you. You might give them a guessing stone because they guess better. And in fact, if you're closer, the odds of guessing correctly and getting the guessing stone when someone chooses students are much higher. Now, the other thing is, this is where it gets interesting. You might notice that someone else, the shapes they made or the cones they made on their turn, seem to be testing certain things and they guess right on a couple of students in a row. You could figure out that they're clearly on the right track and look at what they were constructing and asking the master. So you're interacting with the other players and their tests. For example, you might be close. You might not want to do a certain test because it tips your hand if you think that you're on the right path and no one else is. You don't want to do a test that makes it obvious you're testing color, for example. So the game gets really interesting in that level. But in the end, it's just pattern recognition. Yeah, it's pretty much, it's the same game as Mastermind, only multiplayer and much more complex because there are so many more factors that go into it. Now, usually people play with a set of ground rules. Like if you make a guess, like there are only blue pieces next to yellow pieces, if, whatever, whatever, whatever, there's a thousand qualifiers. The master can be like, that's ridiculous. I'm not even going to take a stone. Yeah, and the thing is the master isn't going to choose something for the Buddha nature that is so complicated, right? He could, but only if all the players are on that level or are really willing to deal with that. Yeah, who's going to be a jerk and be like, yeah, the Buddha nature is at least one blue pointing at a yellow, at least one yellow pointing at a green, at least one thing somewhere that's stacked, at least two pyramids laying down and all the pips add up to an odd number and there's no greens. It's like, there are no situational conditions like the player, you know, who the player is or what time it is or anything. It's just the pieces. Yeah, that would be absolute bullshit, right? And in fact, most people... Because you have to be able to look at all the sets that are out on the table as examples, right? As you play, you know, just like in Mastermind, every set you play stays out on the table and thus you start to run out of expensive pyramids. Now, more importantly, the way people play this game too is you can use anything. You could use just any random assortment of bits as long as they're reasonably consistent with one another. And you define the ground rules ahead of time when you're playing with a given group as to what is and is not a state as far as the game. For example, when we were playing, you could put a pyramid pointing at another pyramid, but it did not matter where it was pointing, only that it was pointing at the pyramid or at no pyramid. Yeah, or it didn't matter what direction it was pointing either. Yes, and you could not put a pyramid inside of a pyramid. There was pointing at, not pointing at, on the table, not on the table, laying down, standing up. But there was no, like, a small pyramid inside of a big pyramid was the same as a small pyramid pointing at a big pyramid. Before the game, we decided what was gonna be a factor. Like, let's say you could have a game where you said, listen, the only things that are gonna be a factor in this game are color and size. Nothing else matters, right? So it's like, oh, so arrangement doesn't matter. No, so green, green, blue is the same as green, blue, green, if they're all the same size, right? But, you know, medium, green, medium, blue, big, green is different than medium, blue, medium, green, medium, yellow, right? Because color and size matter, but nothing else. Yep, so because the order didn't matter, order only mattered if things were pointing, and then it was just what's pointing at what. Right, so you determine before you start which factors come into play so you can, you know, limit the set of things you have to test for when deciphering the code. And yet, this is crazy fun because, you know, everyone's sitting there racking their brain, going, what could it be, what could it be? And you try something you think is clever and then you think it's the Buddha nature and it's not, or you think it is, or you think it's not, and it is. We had a really, really good master, too. He's obviously played this game a lot.  I tried to buy them online. So the cheapest way to get them in bulk. That we can find. I did a lot of research. You couldn't find used ones on eBay or? Yeah, I didn't find anything like that. Also, I realized in my whole life, you know, I've been on stuff on eBay. I've never actually bought a thing on eBay. I've actually bought quite a, ever.  In my entire life. But I will link to, there's a game called Ice Dice and it comes with a total of 30 of these pyramids and costs about $15 to $17. That's not 30 sets of pyramids. That's 30 pyramids. The sets of pyramids themselves cost twice as much per pyramid.  So when I say a set of pyramids, I mean one red, one small red, one medium red, one big, all the same color. That's a set, right? So how many colors are there? Well, there are different, we play with five colors, I believe. But there are other sets of colors. And I didn't get those, like there's a Xeno set and notice how some of the advanced cones have the idea of a quote, strange piece. This game can have as many dimensions of buddiness as you desire. But between five colors, right? You know, red, green, blue, yellow, black, I think are the colors, right? Three pyramids each. So that's five times three is 15. That's 15 pyramids. If you buy a copy of Ice Dice, you get two blacks of each size, two reds of each size, two yellows of each size. It's not a lot of pyramids. You need to spend, it's crazy money to get a lot of these pyramids. But if you think about it, it's like, okay, you don't really need the pyramids. You could make these, you could do whatever. But you want the pyramids. You want the pyramids.  So it's sort of worth it if you heavily utilize them in gaming frequently and try to play all these games with them or come up with games with them. It is very telling. They're such versatile game pieces and they don't serve the same uses as dice or generic pawns or other gaming pieces. So they're unique. That it's sort of worth having at least some of them if you're not gonna buy a ton of them. The telling factor as to why I think this game was good is that we were playing it for a while and one, people kept coming up and staring at it and you could see them, especially if you're playing like master and then a stone comes out. Students, stones come out. This game is incomprehensible to outsiders and it looks fascinating and complicated. But two, we just kept playing it. And at one point we're like, hey, should we play something else? Everyone kind of sat there. No, let's just keep playing this. We played it for a while. But the other thing that you can do is it's up to the master sort of, even though the master has no stake in the winning or losing, it's up to them in determining the difficulty.  Like let's say- Our master did this really well. He gave what is possibly the most unhelpful set of initial examples possible. Right, so let's say we determine that stacking, color, size, laying down and number of pips are all gonna be factors, right? But the actual Buddha nature is no mediums, right? So I lay out something with no mediums. It's got guys laying down and pointing every which way and stacking and whatever. And I say that has the Buddha nature and then I lay another one down. It's just one medium by itself. It has a medium. Well, that might be too obvious. So it's a medium and a bunch of other pieces in a different configuration. It's a medium and a whole mess of stuff.   So you had to figure it out in game, extending the game. And if the game gets really long, you either have to remove some of the sets from the table to use the pieces or buy a lot of pieces. So to play a really complex, difficult, incredibly high level game of the Zendo, you need a lot of expensive pieces. I ordered three sets of the ice dice, which was like 45 bucks or so. Yeah, it's a lot. You could have gotten a real board game for that money. The thing is, I think I'm gonna order a few more sets of it just because these pieces will be useful last me forever. And it is very fun to be the master. You can see the kinds of people who like to run this. This is a game. You can go to PAX and you will gather a gigantic crowd who will want to play this game trivially. And you could even come up with some variants, right? Cause these play any game, right?  And like, you just, people keep coming up, getting a line. And when you get to the front of the line, it's your turn. It's just a crazy long line. And then whoever gets it wins. And the table just keeps filling up with more and more pieces. But since everyone's in line, they don't see it till they get up there. And like maybe they have 30 seconds to do something, you know? Anyway, you could come up with a lot of fun stuff to do. It's a super fun game. I highly recommend it, but it's expensive. So trick one of your friends into buying the pieces and running it for you. Or maybe find some other sort of pieces that have an equal number of factors that you can play the same game. I mean, you could do this with like dice. Sort of. You need colored dice. If you had a giant bag of D&D dice and you agreed that color didn't matter, you could play this game. Yeah. Or maybe color doesn't matter. You have a whole bunch of D.  Right, but you could go out and buy. Like the thing is dice end up being more expensive than ice house pieces. Yes, and it's not like the old days where I really needed 40 different D20s. I know, right? Because the first one wasn't lucky enough. No, I just need a sack of D6s. This has been Geek Nights with Rym and Scott. Special thanks to DJ Pretzel for the opening music, Kat Lee for web design, and Brando K for the logos. Be sure to visit our website at frontrowcrew.com for show notes, discussion news, and more. Remember, Geek Nights is not one but four different shows. SciTech Mondays, Gaming Tuesdays, Anime Comic Wednesdays, and Indiscriminate Thursdays. Geek Nights is distributed under a Creative Commons attribution 3.0 license. Geek Nights is recorded live with no studio and no audience, but unlike those other late shows, it's actually recorded at night.


There versus there versus there. There, there and there are words that are often confused. There simply is the contraction for they are. There is a possessive pronoun and refers to something that is owned by a group. There simply refers to a place. Let's take a look at this example sentence. They're going to love it there because their food is the best. There is the contracted form of they are. There stands for the place and there indicates ownership. Next time you have trouble, ask yourself if you want to say they are or talk about a place or indicate ownership. That's it for today. See you next time.