Whereas intuition can sometimes be seen as a bit, a bit woo-woo. Oh, well, anyway. And do we trust it? Do we trust our intuition? We don't know what woo-woo is, but it sounds a-nust. Well, I like it. Do we trust it?  What is intuition? How do we connect with it? And how do we know what it is and when it is intuition? We demystify what goes on behind the therapy room door. Join us on this voyage of discovery and co-creative conversations. This is The Therapy Show, behind closed doors podcast with Bob Cook and Jackie Jones. So welcome back to the next episode of The Therapy Show behind closed doors with myself and the wonderful Bob Cook. And this is episode 53. We've done over 12 months now, Bob. 53. Gosh, it zooms along at such a fast pace. It does. It does. When you're enjoying yourself, Jackie, that's it. You know, when you're enjoying yourself, time just goes into a time bubble. It's like when I'm playing chess. Right? Now, I love chess and amongst other things, chess is probably the game where time just goes so quickly. I don't know where it goes. It goes through a time bubble. But when you're enjoying yourself, time just flies. 53. 53. Yes. I believe it. And we're getting some lovely comments on the YouTube channel as well. I've noticed that you're getting some comments on the YouTube channel. So keep it open. If anybody's got any recommendations for anything that they would like, your expertise and your unique take on things, then they can just pop it in the comments there and we'll get around to it. Well, I'm so pleased to hear that people are commenting. I haven't looked for a while and I hope they're saying nice things or at least questions or curiosity questions. So I'll go on and reply to a lot of these, I think. That would be lovely. I'm sure people would love to hear from you. So tonight's episode is a, I'm looking forward to this one, Bob. It's all about the importance of intuition in the therapy room. Wow. That's a good subject. You know, Eric Byrne, the originator of transaction analysis. And of course what you and I were trained in in our first trainings anyway. He wrote a book on intuition in 1957. Did you know that? I didn't. There we are. I was looking for today and I'm looking up the library here because I put it out and I can't see it in the library, but I was looking at it. I thought I'd look at it just before I did this podcast and hastily didn't. But I did read it about 200 years ago. You've got a hell of a memory, Bob. I can't even remember the title. I think the title is intuition in ego states, but I'm not quite sure. It might be intuition in the mind, but I did briefly read it. And of course he believes that intuition comes very much from the younger self or in TA terms when I called it P1 in layman's terms, let's say the younger self, really young. And he talks a lot about intuition. So intuition is very much the thinking of Eric Byrne. Interesting, isn't it? It is. I wouldn't have thought that would be because it's a very logical, you know, modality, I think. That's why I like it. Whereas intuition can sometimes be seen as a bit a bit woo-woo. Oh, well, anyway. And do we trust it? Do we trust our intuition? We don't know what woo-woo is, but it sounds a nice. Well, I like it.  What is intuition? How do we connect with it? And now do we know what it is and when it is intuition? Well, you see, I think that's an interesting question. How do we know when intuition is intuition? Now, I think if you talk to most therapists, and you're, of course, sitting opposite of me, and you are a therapist, so we'll be interested in what you said. But if you talk to most therapists, I think most of them will talk about the importance of sometimes following their intuition in the therapeutic process. So are you one of those therapists who would also say that? Yes. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah. So what would you, and it's interesting, I'll never ask you this question. What would, do you know what the criteria would be for following your intuition? So in other words, what would make you following your intuition? Would you think about clinical treatment planning or thinking about clinical direction or would you just follow a feeling you've got? What sort of? I think that would always be in the back of my mind in whatever I'm doing in the therapy room. But often, yeah, I, when I was first qualified, I had a plan. I had handouts. I had all this thing and it was like, in this session, I'm going to do this. Whereas the more experience you get, that's where my intuition would come in, is maybe, you know, where it's going in the therapy room, but always having the treatment plan at the back of my mind. So you're saying that you think intuition is conscious rather than unconscious? Yes. Unless there's a feeling with it. If there's a feeling, then I think it's unconscious. I refer to it as like a gut feeling. Then that's emotional and a feeling and maybe that's unconscious without a conscious thought. Okay. So I think one of the big questions about intuition is what's the difference between intuition and script? Good question. Yes. So for people who perhaps aren't transactional analysts here, would you like to define script or shall I do it? You can do it and I'll take it. I love scripted stuff. Okay. I see script as a, and Byrne defined it different ways, but really the major definition in his last book, he called it script and unconscious life plan, which is originated in early in life and it's followed through. And we have our own scripts that we may follow throughout life. So that's why I asked that question. How do we know the difference between intuition and early script, the early decisions that we've followed early in life? So another question is, in terms of countertransference, people who perhaps hopefully are therapists listening to this and know what countertransference is, but it's your own stuff, which has been sort of a vote by the client's stuff. So, you know, if a client's depressed, for example, and talk about depression, and you've got some depression which hasn't been resolved, then you could end up merging with your client in a way because your depression and their depression can get mixed up. Yeah. Yeah, that would be an example. So for example, you might take the client towards CBT because you don't want to deal with the feelings of the depression yourself, for example. So that would be countertransference. So sometimes when we think or have a feeling we should go this direction and I think the clinical question is, really, what's the difference to an intuition in countertransference? And if there is any? And how you would determine that? That is the question. How would you determine that? Because we do all have a script and our script is in the room with us all the time. You see, psychoanalysts going back 120 years ago for young and people like that. Young did talk a lot about intuition, by the way, but the early analysts, they would preach for all the analytical training is that the therapist keeps out of the relationship and doesn't have countertransference if you want to put it that way around. Is that possible, Bob? Is what possible? For the therapist to stay out of the room, is that doable? Well, as I say, before, you know, I think ego psychotherapy in the 1950s, if you went into a book shop, if there was one, you know, on psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, all the books would be about the importance of the therapist staying outside the relationship and not actually talking about their own or sharing their sense of self in the relationship. Analysts tend to make a couple of interpretations most, you know, in a 50-minute session. But they're they aren't really calling that sharing their self. So psychoanalysts would talk about once you share yourself in the relationship, you're contaminating the field because it's your stuff. Yeah. I just don't know how I would go about doing that. And I suppose I don't understand how you wouldn't understand. But I'm in the room, my script goes wherever I go. It's part of the course, it's part of the course. So how can I leave that outside the room? Well, I wonder if you're correct at another level, you simply don't share it. Yes, yeah. I could do the not sharing part of it, but it is still in the room with me. Yeah, and if you don't share it and it stays in your head, then is it going to have any effect on the clinical treatment? Yeah. You think that if you're not sharing what you're thinking and feeling, yeah, by not sharing it, you're saying to me that still you still have an impact or effect on the treatment. I think so. Maybe not the treatment, maybe the relationship, maybe the therapeutic relationship. Tell me in what way, how? One, I don't overshare in the room, but if it's relevant I would share something. But if if there's something going on for me in my scripted stuff in that room, then my mind's going to be preoccupied with it. It's going to be in the room whether I want it to or not to a certain extent. Oh, even if you said to yourself, well, I'm going to ignore that and think about it afterwards. Well, yeah, but in order to ignore something, you've got to focus on it to ignore it if that makes sense. So what you're saying that you're saying that by definition, part of you may always be in the the therapy room and by that, you know, to the fact you're preoccupying yourself takes you away from the contact of the client and then that itself may contaminate the field. Yeah. It's a very difficult subject when you look at it that way. Well, analysts, I'm going to think about psychoanalysts. They're trained not to act out or preoccupy themselves with their own in the world. They're trained with thinking about interpretation rather than sharing material of the self. Because because of contaminating the field and because they may actually be coming from a script or counter-script position or counter-transferential position, which actually is nothing to do with the client but is to do with them. Yeah, but if we interpret things that's only our reality of it. So therefore are we in the room anyway? Well, I don't come from a psychoanalystical position because I think the early analysts will come in from a one almost like an expert position, which I don't agree with. I think that's why I didn't train in psychoanalysts. I trained in a much more sort of egalitarian, I'm okay, you're okay, humanistic position. So but I was just thinking in terms of intuition where we started off with. But if we just reactively share our feelings without clinical thinking then we might be coming from a counter-transference place. Yes. Or a scripted place rather than actually what we might think is intuition. Yeah. I'm surprised at what you said right at the very beginning of this that, you know, intuition is in P1. The younger self. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know about that. I found that quite surprising. I don't know why I just do. Well, when I think you know I think you know this Jackie, I mean because I know you know a lot about child development and but the younger we are the more likely we are to not censor anything come from a place where we just speak spontaneously. It's just as our critical part of self starts developing do we actually impinge ourselves before that we're much more likely to come from a much more spontaneous free position but as we get older and there's all these critical stuff coming in we stop ourselves. Yeah. And is that what intuition is? Yeah. Well, this is it. This is what I suppose a podcast about is intuition when we free ourselves from the critical parent or injunctions that we tell ourselves is it when we allow to actually get in touch with what's happening on the inside from an uncluttered uncontaminated place on our able then to follow our feelings without censoring ourselves. Yeah. When you put it that way. Yeah. Yeah. I suppose I don't know that there has to be some logical part to intuition to work out what it is trying to tell us. Well, what do you see intuition as that? Like a gut feeling or an internal satnav directing us down a certain route. Yeah. What I believe is that the very early on we start to we may follow that spontaneously and then as we get older, you know, two, three, four, five and we internalize the critical or the belief systems that come from our parents and significant others we start to inhibit ourselves in terms of following those feelings. Before that I think we spontaneously quite often just follow our feelings which often we could call intuition. Yeah. Maybe we should look up Oxford English Dictionary definition of what intuition is. Yeah. I mean, I think it's very important though question because I think a lot of therapists might follow their intuition when actually they're coming from a counter-transference or script position. Yeah. They think it's intuition. Yeah. And there's a danger in that, isn't there? Well, counter-transference in the therapy room, yeah. Because you're sharing your own stuff which actually has nothing to do with the client, really. It's intuition. But in fact it could be easily have etiology and script. Yeah. See, I was thinking when we were going to do this podcast and we were starting I was thinking about past clients and where has intuition played a part for me. And what I came up with, I can particularly remember one client that was divulging something in the therapy room and I didn't have a reaction to it at all which is quite unlike me. And to me that was my intuition saying that something wasn't right about what they were saying. It just didn't fit right. So that's when I was thinking intuition plays out for me in the therapy room. Does that make sense? The example makes sense to me. The query for me would be is that counter transfers? You know, it's like what's the difference? I don't know. No, I know. You've got this podcast. I'm just querying it to the listeners you see. Yeah. The difference between counter transfers and script and how you would know. You see, I like what you said right at the beginning of this. But you said that if there's a feeling attached to it or there's a feeling and there's not thought processes you would call that intuition. Once you have the thought processes to the feeling then you may think about, well perhaps there's something more around script here. I like that. But I like it and I think we're in a very interesting area. If we are going to train therapists to follow all their feelings willy or nilly we're in a dangerous area aren't we? 100% yeah. Because to be fair it depends what day it is or the week as to where your feelings are likely to be. So what is going to indicate intuition? Surely not. Linking surely to just feelings. No. You know and it may be you might say yes to that but I just think it's a dangerous ground to give therapy's permissions to share their feelings without clinical thought. On the sort of back of calling that intuition. Yeah. I suppose I kind of know myself quite well now so I know whether the feeling that I'm having in the room is appropriate to what's going on or if it doesn't feel right then to me that's my intuition. Right. So it's backed up for clinical thought then isn't it? Yeah. It's backed up by your own therapy if you like. It's backed up in knowing yourself. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah. And I think one of the big things for me as a therapist is that I do know myself quite well and I think that's quite important. Well, thank goodness for that because if you're in the BAC where they don't ask for you to have any of your own therapy we might be having a different conversation. Yeah. And it's an ongoing process even now I think you know there's still parts of me that I'm sure that I've not dealt deep enough to explore but yeah. I think we have a conundrum with intuition and you hit it anyway when you were saying about logic you know it's a paradoxical if we're going to start using logic to explain intuition on a paradoxical road. Yeah. Yeah. That's why I said it's a bit woo-woo because you can't pin it down. You can't really pin transplants down can you? No. No. I think transplants is a very vague term as well. I can explain it clinically but maybe it's in the land of woo-woo as well. Yeah. Have you ever experienced transplants? Well every minute of the day I can remember specifically one. Seriously, I meant what I just said. I think it's in the land of transplants a lot. So you know Eric Byrne used to say well if you're an adult then you're not in transplants. Wow. Then the question is how do we know whether we're an adult or not and then we could say we're acting appropriate to the age we you know age we are, I'm 71 for example. So okay but or stroke and I think transplants is around all of the time and it doesn't mean I always am aware when I'm in transplants hopefully I know myself quite well like you I can spot when I'm in transplants quicker than I used to 20 or 30 years ago but I think transplants is always around in the clinical domain transplants is nearly always there when we open the door to our clients whether we act on it or know that is a different story. Yeah, maybe I don't know myself that well then. Well transplants we live in projections don't we? Yes, we live all the time in the land of projections and projection is the mechanism of transplants. Yeah I see when I think about transplants I see it as a I don't know a definite emotional response and reaction to it as opposed to just it being transplants and counter transplants I don't know for me the times where I've known I'm in it I've had a real physical emotional reaction to something and that's kind of like oh Jesus yeah that's that's what that is So your feelings have given you the absolute that you're not in you here and now you're in another ego state Yeah, this is my stuff 100% the feelings that I'm getting are definitely mine Yeah So if we go back to the beginning again I don't think it was beginning but you said you were surprised that I would put intuition in the realm of the younger self So where would where would you put intuition then? I'm not sure when I was saying I was I thought exactly the same thing to me there has to be a certain intelligence to work out that it's intuition I don't know the free child the free spirited without limits and everything else I don't see that as intuition I don't know why So the question is if you don't see that free uncluttered and contaminated part of ourselves which is certainly there in our younger self as the etiology or the beginnings of intuition it's like well where does intuition arise if we use TA in the ego state model the question would be is it throughout all our different ego states? Possibly yeah it's a wonderful debate to have I don't know where it would sit whether it would sit in one or not Well you have to go to definitions if we look at adult ego state the definition Bern talked about is that we're in adult we're in the here and now acting the age we are so therefore if we say does intuition is it in that part of our self I would say it could well be in that part but did it arise from that part of our self is another story Yes I understand that Yeah Is it apparent? No I don't think apparent isn't where I think intuition arises Again I think intuition has its etiology in the child the younger self there's an awful lot of good stuff in the child to be fair before the adult takes over and we kind of evolve into where we are I've got a four year old grandson and I love his free spirit and spontaneity and all that sort of stuff but he's coming up to that age now where he's starting to take notice of his surroundings and conform to certain things Well I was just talking to Richard Erskine he rung three minutes before this podcast started because I haven't spoken to him for a long time well I'm seeing him Name dropping there Bob Oh he's coming to our institute for three weeks time Is he? Yeah Bert or stroke and I was just thinking Richard's saying to me quite a few times that some of his best work is ever done this is personal communication as being when he's followed his intuition Now we never went further to have this conversation like we're having in the podcast you know but where does that intuition come from but I would also say so face safe myself when I've followed that intuition of mine I've clinically I'm talking about it's usually had positive results rather than negative results I do like to back it up with clinical theory but when I do follow it sometimes and somebody said why don't you go down that direction mostly I can explain it clinically but when it's from an intuitive part myself you know I usually have good results and I still think that's from a younger part of myself when I haven't had that cluttered parent ego state whirling around I've managed to shut it off somehow Yeah and it does make sense when you're saying it you know to use your intuition and that's there's no critical dialogue going on it's just taking you down a certain route I think it's taking down a freer route I'm absolutely convinced your intuition is in the freer part of ourselves Yeah I think it's freer from contaminated material energetically we come from much more freer sense of spontaneity I think that's where intuition is you know they're not young would have said about intuition but he said a lot and I'd better even talk about that in terms of archetypes you know our spirit is where intuition arises from but I do know it doesn't it doesn't live in the parent ego state it arises I think from a different part of ourselves the younger side whichever part whether it's our spirit whether it's our energetic side of us but it's a side which isn't cluttered with the parental interjects Yeah and there's something about the intent of it as well I think you know to use it with a positive intent in the therapy room do you know what I mean intuition to be is good juicy stuff it's not ever negative it's for the good of the client to go down that route with your intuition I think Yeah, you see relational transaction relational transaction analysis which was formed in 2008 even though the ideology of it was earlier that the book relational transaction analysis came out in 2008 now if you follow that style of transaction analysis it's based on using account of transfers and it's based on you knowing yourself very very very well as a supervision every couple of weeks using your sharing your account of transfers your sense of self all the time in the relationship now I'll go back I'm wary of giving training therapists especially beginning therapists to just share their feelings or what they think might be intuition without clinical thinking wary of that because what they might think is intuition of feelings might actually be counter injunction so the clue would be in knowing yourself very well I think yeah and that takes time you can't learn that that's three years of personal therapy yeah absolutely absolutely absolutely and I train a lot therapists over the years more and more I want when I talking about how come people did what they did in the therapy room I want to know their clinical thinking now if they just said to me oh that's just have an intuitive feeling fine and which part of the self did that come from yeah my next question because I wanted to distinguish between the two that's not such an easy distinguishing they might just say well I just don't know I felt like it now that might feel strange what I just said earlier in the podcast that when I've actually followed my intuition I've had positive results but that's usually when I've known myself quite well it's not beginning it wasn't in my beginning years of therapy no it definitely wasn't with me because like I said I used to plan every session I knew what I needed to do in the session and everything there was a lot of definitely not intuition going on in fact looking back on it half the time I probably wasn't in the room at all in the early days I was very much focused on what I should be doing and having the plan I think intuition is energy free what I mean by that is lies in the realm of free energy I really believe that I like that and when it pops up in the room it's noticeable often for me intuition can pop up in the world of meandering yeah it's one of those like I said it's woo-woo it's one of those things that it is difficult to work out a situation where it would come up or why it comes up because it is quite random it's like an insight yeah you can't force an insight no you can't force an insight but you see on an exam board you'll be deferred no seriously seriously seriously I'm not disputing it somebody said I just had an intuitive feeling and I followed that the next question from anybody on an exam board would be okay so tell me a clinical thinking about that now if you know we had a discussion like this on an exam board right and somebody was talking about intuition come from the younger self and all this sort of stuff we can get to a place where they wouldn't necessarily be deferred but they would need to be able to talk about seeing the difference between counter injunction script and intuition now if they can talk like that that shows a clinical nuance which is pretty advanced yeah if they can't that means that they could be taking clients down a road which actually they don't need to get out yeah it's a bit of a minefield then won't be isn't it well I think the way we're talking now is the way a person needs to talk when they're talking about intuition I mean a therapist because they can talk with awareness about counter transfer script and intuition and how challenging the whole process can be yeah definitely no I wish I'd have had time to read the book by Eric Byrne but I'm sure he would have said it comes from the younger self yeah without the internal dialogue all that sort of stuff yeah definitely and if we can follow that I think we can have great results because we're allowing ourselves a freedom which we often don't allow ourselves and if nothing else we can model that to our clients who are so usually full of contaminations and clutteredness they don't allow themselves to have that free energy yeah what a wonderful podcast Bob it's an interesting one isn't it it is there's a lot of food for thought for me yeah it needs to simmer a bit I think it's been a wonderful topic and if we ask the transpersonal psychiatrist I'm sure they have many different ideas and thoughts about where intuition resides maybe they say in the spiritual dimension ourselves but certainly not on the parent I can absolutely say that yeah yeah that takes us down a whole different road about spirituality in the therapy room maybe that's one that we should do at some point I'm sure it's on our list somewhere it quite possibly is yeah so on that note Bob we will be back for the next episode which I think kind of leads on quite nicely from this moment because we're going to be looking at understanding emotional triggers and why this is important in the therapy process yes what you just talked about the emotional triggers it's so important to understand that yeah I look forward to talking about that okie dokie until next time Bob thank you Jackie bye you've been listening to The Therapy Show behind closed doors podcast we hope you enjoyed the show don't forget to subscribe and leave us a review we'll be back next week with another episode


Hi, I'm Zor. Welcome to Unisor Education. I would like to solve a couple of problems related to Lorentz force. This lecture is part of the course called Physics for Teens, presented on Unisor.com. There is, by the way, a prerequisite course called Math for Teens. Physics is using lots of math, so you really have to know math. So if you need Math for Teens is for you as well. Now I would recommend you to watch this lecture from this website rather than from, let's say, YouTube or wherever you found it. Because the site contains very detailed notes for each lecture. It's like a textbook, basically. Plus, if you would like to register, you can save some information about your exams. Maybe your parents or teachers can actually get involved in your education, basically assigning you certain things, certain topics from the course, etc. But it's not necessary. You can go to the website. It's completely free. There are no ads. You don't have to sign in and there are even exams if you want to take it. So we have three problems related to the Lorentz force. So the problem number one is the following. Consider there is a uniform magnetic field. So this is north and south of some kind of a magnet which is around it. But in between these two, it's a uniform. For instance, it can be, you know, the shoe, the horse shoe kind of a magnet. This is a north, this is a south. And this is the lines of the field which are, we can assume, it's uniform or any other way of creating the uniform magnetic field. Now, there is some kind of a wire here hanging on two threads, let's say. Now this is, I tried to to picture it in three dimensions, but basically for my purpose it's much more important to show it in such a way that the wire is like this pen, basically. This way. To show how it behaves in the magnetic field. So this is my wire. It goes through this board perpendicular to the board. These are magnetic fields, field lines. Okay, so what happens if there is an electric current going through this particular wire? Well, we have the Lorentz force, right? So there is a Lorentz force and it forces the the whole wire to basically move perpendicularly to both direction of the magnetic force and direction of the current. Right? So let's assume that it goes this way. Now, but since it's hanging, so these are the hanging needs, it will basically take this position. So from this position, it will go to this position. It has certain mass. The wire has certain mass. So there is a gravity. We are assuming this is in the gravitational field of Earth. So there is some kind of an acceleration of the free fall. So it cannot really go all the way up. Because, even if the magnet is large enough, let's consider it's still within the field, but it will still not go all the way up. Well, it depends, obviously, how strong the field is. But it will go a little bit up and then the force of the gravity will push it back here, right? So we have two different forces. The Lorentz force, which goes always in this particular direction. And we have a here, we have a gravity here. This is gravity, and this is the Lorentz force. And obviously there is a tension of the wire. Now at a certain moment it will stop because these three forces will balance each other. Now here is the problem. So there is an s, there is a g, there is an angle phi, at which it actually stopped and it reaches the equilibrium. These three forces are in equilibrium. Now what else? Now this particular wire has certain lengths and there is a current which goes through it. Now in my problem, I don't really have the current, but I have the voltage and the resistance of the wire. So this this wire is connected to a certain source of electricity which has the voltage and the wire has certain resistance. So these are all given. Now what remains to be determined is what is the force of the magnetic field. Remember Tesla? These are units. We are measuring the intensity of the magnetic field, right? So that's what we have to find out. We have to measure intensity of the field. Now obviously we will use the Lorentz force, which basically states that this Lorentz force is equal to the current times lengths of the wire times the intensity of the magnetic force. So we were measuring the force, the current and the lengths and we have determined that the force is proportional to these two things. And this is basically a coefficient of proportionality, which depends on the field. Obviously the stronger the field, magnetic field, the greater will be the force with given current and the lengths. So this equation can be a measurement. If we know the force, it can be a measurement of the magnetic field's intensity. And that's exactly what we would like to find out here. We don't have the force. However, we know that these three forces T, F and this is Mg. I think I use capital M in my problem. P is equal to Mg. So we know that these three forces are in equilibrium to each other. So that gives us the force. We can determine the force. And from the force, we will determine the magnetic field's intensity. Okay? So let's do first the mechanical part to find the force. And then we will do the electromagnetic part from the force. We will find the intensity of the field. So let me just take this down. This used to be M. So this is our wire and this is the angle it actually moves from the vertical direction under the influence of the Lorentz force. So this is the Lorentz force F. Now this is the weight Mg. And this is the tension. Now, and we know the angle phi, all right? And we know the mass, obviously. Well, that's what the force, the weight actually is. Okay, so how can we basically make all the these in equilibrium? This is how. So this is T. Then to the left, this is phi. Goes T times T times sine of phi. This is T times sine of phi. And this is T times cosine of phi. Now, if this thing is in balance, in equilibrium, the T sine phi is nullifying the F and T cosine is nullifying the weight P, right? So these two are equal and these two are equal in absolute value. And obviously the direction is opposite. And that's why we have complete equilibrium. Well, that's basically enough to find the force. Here it is. So first, T is equal to Mg divided by cosine phi. And if we will multiply it by sine, it will be the force phi. The force, the Lorentz force F. We're talking about absolute value, right? So don't let's not use the vectors here. I mean, we know about the vectors. Vectors are opposite. So we're talking about absolute value, all right? So this is the value of the F, the Lorentz force. Now, from this, we can find the intensity of the magnetic field, right? So B is equal to F divided by I l. Now we can obviously use the law that I, the current, is equal to voltage divided by resistance, the Ohm's law, right? So it's the voltage. Resistance goes here way and this is l. So from this we can find the B is equal to, instead of F, we put this. Now, by the way, this is tangent phi. Hope you remember the trigonometry. So it's Mg tangent phi. This is F. So times r and divided by u, l. So all these variables are used in this formula and this is the intensity of the field. Now let's just think about it and how logical and reasonable the formula actually is. Obviously, if, given the angle, the more massive our wire is, the more force we need to, more Lorentz force, which means the more intensity of the field we need to move this mass to this angle, right? Similarly, if angle is given, if it's not on Earth, but on a Jupiter, for instance, the weight is greater than the same mass, right? So g would not be 9.8 meters per second square, but something else. So obviously, on a Jupiter, it requires more because the weight is more so the force should be stronger, the Lorentz force should be stronger and the field should have more intensity. Now, resistance. If resistance is greater than the current is less, right? And obviously the less the current, the less influence the magnetic field has on the wire. I mean, if there is no current at all, there is no Lorentz force. So basically, it should depend on the resistance, the greater the resistance, the more field we need to compensate for the weakness of the current. Now here, in the denominator, we have the voltage. Again, the greater the voltage was given other parameters, the stronger the current and the stronger the current, the less magnetic force we need because the interaction depends on both, magnetic force and the current. They are, you see, proportional to each other. So if this is greater, this can be smaller to compensate. And same thing for the lengths. I mean, the longer the lengths, the more interaction with magnetic field this wire has. Obviously, it's easier. So the greater this, the less this should be. Okay, that's basically the kind of explanation of this formula that really is reasonable. Oh, yes, I forgot about tangent. Now, if the greater the angle is, obviously, the stronger the field should be, right? And the tangent is monotonically increasing function, but in this case from 0 to 90 degrees range. Okay, that's it for the first problem. Now the second problem is related to something the physicists really like to work with. Now right now, or probably during the last 50 years, lots of physicists were involved in elementary particles, which they were using to, using some kind of accelerators, they were bombarding certain other elements with elementary particles, etc. So this is about elementary particles. Now, I will simplify this and then I will explain actually what kind of a relationship it has to elementary particles. Now consider you have a wire and there is no current yet. But there is one specific point charge Q, which is traveling through the wire with the speed B. Now, let's consider that the wire has certain lengths and the field, magnetic field, has certain intensity B. Given. Now my first question is not related to magnetism, it's related to electricity. If one particular charge going like a point charge, like an impulse, if you wish, what is an impulse? Impulse is actually a point charge moving along the wire, right? So if this particular charge is moving along the wire, can we talk about equivalent direct current which basically delivers the same thing, the same result? Now, what is the same result? Certain amount of electricity which is moving during certain amount of time, right? What is the definition of the current? It's amount of electricity in coulombs, let's say, divided by time t per unit of time, right? That's what basically what the definition of the current is. Now, can we talk about equivalent current here? Well, yes, because the time we have, this is L divided by V, distance divided by the speed. Now, the amount of electricity is Q. So when this particular point charge moves along the wire all the way, that's equivalent to I equals 2 Q divided by time, which is L times V. So this is the current which is produced by one single charge moving along a wire, point charge, just by itself. It's not exactly the same as direct current because direct current means a flow of electrons, not just an impulse. However, from the perspective of, you know, practical kind of view to this particular experiment, it looks like we have the current of this kind because, again, we're moving a certain amount of electricity during a certain amount of time. So we can assume, and I definitely recognize that it's not mathematically rigorous assumption. We can assume that instead of one charge, point charge, going through the wire under this condition with the speed and the lengths of the wire, we have a current which is physically equivalent. So we should observe the same kind of results of this experiment as if the current of this kind flowing through the wire. Okay? Again, it's not mathematically rigorous but on the physical level of observing the same results, that's actually true. So what is our problem now? So the first problem was determine the equivalent direct current equivalent to this particular situation. And the second problem is to define to find out what is the Lorentz force exerted on this wire. Well, that's simple. f is equal to i times l times b, right? Which is equal to, l will cancel. So we will have qvb. So if one particular, let's say electron or proton, some electric particle, electrically charged particle, going through the magnetic field, forget about the wire now, l is, it's canceled out. It experiences Lorentz force. It feels this Lorentz force equal to this. It depends on the charge, on the speed and obviously on the field itself. Wire is no longer involved. Why? Well, because this Lorentz force, where is it applicable? If it's a point charge, it's applicable only to this local place where this particular charge is located at one particular moment. So at every moment, the whole force of this magnitude is acting on this charge only, not on the entire wire. So that's what kind of a little deviation, I would say, from the classical view on the Lorentz force. We don't have this wire with a direct current flowing, constantly flowing with the same speed through it. We have one particular particle carrying a charge. And now this force actually acts on this particular particle. So this is the answer to the second problem. This is the Lorentz force, which we wanted to find out. This is the force which the particle actually is acted upon. And this is the second problem. Now the third problem is related to the second problem and I will explain you how. Now let's forget about the wire. We do have a particle and it just flows through the magnetic field. So that's the equivalent of the current going that way and magnetic field going this way. So in this particular case, this particle should deviate from its straight line trajectory because there is a Lorentz force and it's perpendicular to the trajectory and perpendicular to this. So it goes to perpendicular to the board. Now I will change my view. I will look from the top and what do I see in this particular case? The lines of magnetic fields are, that's in this particular case, they go vertically. So all the magnetic field lines, so let's assume that the north is here and the south is behind the board. Now what if I have a particle which is flowing into this magnetic field? Now we are assuming, obviously, that the magnetic field is uniform and it has the intensity b in teslas. So what happens? Well, depending on the direction of the magnetic lines north to south or south to north, let's not think about this right now. Let's consider what will be with the Lorentz force. Lorentz force will be perpendicular to both. To these lines, magnetic lines from north to south and to the current. Well, the particle goes, so this is an electrically charged particle. Q would definitely be, and this is the speed, will definitely be equivalent to a current. And the force will be perpendicular to both, perpendicular to this and perpendicular to this. Which is what? Well, it's a vertical direction. So let's assume it's down. So if it's down, then it should curve. Right? The force goes down. It's perpendicular to this and perpendicular to lines of magnetic field. Now let's just think about it. The force is always perpendicular to the trajectory, which means that at this point, the force is this way. At this point, the force is this way. Then it goes a little further, and the force will be still perpendicular. So it looks like, well, it feels everywhere, magnetic field. It looks like it should actually turn into a circle. Well, let's just think about, is it a circle? Now, and this is a difficult part, because I cannot rigorously prove that this is a circle, because it's kind of involved. There are lots of, you know, calculations and there are some very elegant solutions, but it's a little bit beyond the level of mathematics which I'm presenting in this course. But let me just explain why it should be a circle. Well, first of all, the force, the Lorentz force, is always perpendicular to trajectory. What does it mean? It means that there is no linear acceleration. You see, wherever it goes, if the force is always perpendicular, it does not increase the tangential speed. So there is no linear acceleration. At the same time, the force has always the same value, right? The Lorentz force is equal to what? Q, V, and V, right? From the previous problem, problem number two. So Q is the same. V is a linear speed of this particular charge. And the V is the field, which is uniform. So we always have exactly the same value of force. Direction is always changing perpendicular to trajectory. But the value is the same. So what does it mean? Well, considering we have a mass, which is always the same, so we have a force, we have a mass, so there is second Newton's law, right? Which gives me an acceleration perpendicularly to the trajectory. Do you remember the rotation? The kinematics of rotation is that there is always centripetal acceleration A, which is equal to what? r omega square or r or V square divided by r. Omega is angular speed and V is linear speed, the same as this one. So we will use this particular thing. So A is a centripetal acceleration always towards the center and always perpendicular to the trajectory, right? Exactly the same as in our case. The force is perpendicular. The Lorentz force is perpendicular to trajectory, right? And its constant value, constant absolute value. So it really looks like this circular movement satisfies completely our conditions. Now, from the physical standpoint, it's usually sufficient to say, okay, that's why the trajectory is a circle. As a mathematician, I would say that's not exactly a rigorous proof because maybe there is some kind of other curve in the plane, which also has the same properties that the linear speed would be constant and acceleration perpendicular to the linear speed would also be constant, but not a circle. Well, and this is exactly what the difficult part to prove that there is no such curve is not easy. So just take my word and there are actually a couple of websites, which maybe I will put into the notes for this lecture, that basically goes to a rigorous proof that the circle is the only thing which is possible. So we assume that circle is the trajectory. So circle trajectory definitely satisfies all our parameters. Now, what is my question? My question is what is the radius of this given whatever else parameters we need? Well, the radius we can define from here, right? r is equal to v squared divided by a. We know v, okay? a, well, a is f divided by m. That's the second Newton's law. And f we also have. So what do we have? We have r is equal to v squared divided by f, which is q, v, b, and m goes to the top. So b, m goes to the top, which is equal to mv divided by qb. mv is by the way momentum of motion. So the greater the momentum of motion, the greater the radius will be. So either the mass is very big or the speed is very big. And to turn it needs obviously greater radius. It will go more greater radius if it's stronger momentum. Now, if charge is greater or intensity of the field is greater, the force will be greater, which actually rounds up the trajectory. So that's basically the kind of reasonable formula. And that's how they calculate what exactly kind of accelerator we need if we would like to, let's say, accelerate one particular proton, for instance. So we know the q, the charge of the proton. We know the mass of the proton. And depending on what kind of a speed we need and what kind of an intensity of the magnetic field we can do, this will give us the radius. And the radius can be very big. I mean, there are some accelerators which are miles in the diameter, right? So that gives you the radius, how to build an accelerator, a cyclotron, right? Okay, that's it for today. I do recommend you to read my notes for this lecture. Good luck. Thank you.


I got my, oh hey Block, thanks for coming man. School's starting soon, and we need to make sure that the kids get there safely, and I need some help. You in? Okay Block, I'm the teacher today, and since all the kids are getting ready for school, I need you to play the part of the students. Awesome. All right, now that we've got this settled, these first tips are for the kids. One, if you're walking, use designated walkways and crosswalks. Obey the walk signal and crossing guard instructions. Always look both ways before entering the crosswalk, and never, ever cross mid block or run. Yeah, that's the way Block. Also, wearing bright colored clothing and walking with a group will help make it easier for motorists to see you. If you ride a bus, never wait for it in the roadway and follow the driver's safety instructions at all times. And if you're riding your bike to school, wear a helmet, obey all the traffic signals, and never ride on a sidewalk or a crosswalk where it's not permitted. Hey man, pay attention here, this is important. Now, it's time for motorist safety tips. First, obey all posted speed limits. Stay alert, slowing in all school zones and watching for young pedestrians and bicyclists. Second, don't impede crosswalks or pass someone who's yielding to pedestrians and watch for school buses, stopping when the stop arm is extended to load and unload passengers. And finally, put the phone down. Seriously? As I was saying, put the phone down and eliminate all distractions when commuting. All right, I think that's all for today's lessons. Right, Block? But before we sign off, all right, well that's all for now folks. I'm Rock, he's Block, until next time.


Oh my god. This is a free people dress to wear. Photos. Good morning guys. It's August 4th and today is my last day with Ryan which is really sad. We're gonna go to Briar Patch for brunch or lunch because it's actually like 12 something right now. We woke up pretty late. Ryan like passed out last night. Like I was like cleaning my room. I was just like sleeping. So he got a lot of good sleep but he actually got a really bad sunburn from yesterday at the beach. So I had to like keep it reapplying all over him. So sad. I don't really understand but apparently he says it feels like something like an iron's burning him or something like that. That sounds miserable. But after we go to Briar Patch for lunch we're gonna hit up the outlets because we used to always go to like Mola Melania. But the last time I went there I was just like honestly like what even is there here you know. Do they even have a firm between one? I don't even know. But like yeah they have some stores like Sephora and stuff like that. And now I feel like it's just like walking around and wasting time. At least the outlets. It's like cheaper. I have yet to go to the Waterford Forever 21. But I heard it's not that great which is really really sad to me. I like kind of already knew it because like it's kind of like in a smaller location than every other Forever 21. So I just feel like it's gonna like look really nice at first and then just get super inorganized as it goes on. Because that's what happened to the one back home like they redid everything. It looked like amazing and then like literally a month later it was like back to the same like disorganized Forever 21. And like I love Forever 21 but it's just like so overwhelming when everything's just not organized the way it should be. What do you have to say for yourself Red Lobster? I just took four apples. Four apples? Show me your redness. You look tan at the camera at least. This is red really. What? This is like red.  So I went to Hobby Lobby, I got these frames for these random acts I have. I put one in each frame and I put them on my table over here because I look at them. I'm gonna hang them up. I just need to take my ring light, not ring light. One of those called Christmas Lights Down. And I actually need to get new ones because one of like a line like a whole line like just like blew out. So I should just probably get new ones. I've got my big lots and for all those YouTubers out there I think I told you guys this before but like if you have the problem where like the lights keep like dimming and going out and going in in your background of your videos. It's because they're not LED so you have to get LED lights and then that won't happen. So guys, I've started vlogging at 8 p.m. and now it's 1 p.m. and I'm finally ready and I'm just gonna get going. Thank you.  Thanks. The guy who was rushing me this whole time. Hey, can you put that in the fridge please?  I don't know if I told you guys but I'm wearing Kristin on my lips by Kylie Cosmetics. I did a little snapchat takeover on Ryan's snap. What's your snapchat? So people can follow you. Ryan will have 69. Ryan will have 69. So I'll have it right here. So you guys can go follow him if you want. Maybe the more followers he gets the more he will post on snapchat because he like barely does. I have 15 followers from posting in her store. Yeah, he was feeling the 15 seconds of fame or whatever he said. Will you get water for the car? Where are you going? It's in the fridge. Water bottle? Yep. The water is for you. Don't sigh. Thank you. Okay, I think we're good. Ready? My pen to CLI. We just got to Winter Park. We're about to get out of our car and go to Brighter Pass and get some good food. I was editing my vlog of Cancun and I don't know, you guys will see it later, but I started bawling my eyes out. We're gonna go get some food, but I actually, oh my god, it looks so bad. I vacuumed my whole car because it was so sandy from yesterday. I'm so blessed that I have a wireless vacuum that I could do that with. That's so cute. You guys match. Ryan's a bear. That's like one of the emojis next to his name on my phone. But if you guys have never been to Winter Park or live in the Orlando area, you should come here because it's really cute. It has a lot of shops. They might not be the most affordable, but it's somewhere good to walk around. It looks like closed. Maybe there's no one outside. You can always tell it's Briar Patch because the yellow tint thing. So Nisha's boyfriend showed me this website. I don't want to spill the deep just yet, but that's what it says. I'm so focused. So that's what it says.  Okay, so open your phone.  Is that funny? Is that funny? What? And then you begin to say Google's it for you. Is that funny? It looks funny. I thought it said I could be your girlfriend. No, no. Because I was just asking like a really random question, you know? So I literally just put in like how to get a girlfriend, whatever. So then he opened it and like it literally took him straight to Google. So that could be like a sarcastic way. If somebody asked you like an obvious question, just do that. Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm so sorry. What? Do you have a pepper here? Savage. It looks so good. Literally like this kind of chocolate cake is like my favorite. It's called ganache mousse kind of thing. It's like fudge. Fudge. It's actually nice. Adds to taste. Alright, can I take this bite? It's right there. Let me talk about it. I like the ice cream. So unfortunately it decided to be so rainy outside. Like it literally started down pouring water in a ryer pot. Probably just not going to go to the outlets because it's an outside mall. So that kind of sucks because I actually really wanted to go to the outlets. But we're just going to do like local kind of shopping. Like we're going to hit up a Goodwill like on our way home in Winter Park. Which I bet they'll have like really cool stuff because like Winter Park is like a more wealthy area.  Unless they like distribute it like all throughout their Goodwill's. Distribute it? How do you say it? Distribute. Distribute it. I don't know. Anyways, yeah, so we're going to Goodwill and then we're going to hit up Waterford Lakes and go into like the new forever 21 which I'm pretty excited about. We had some chocolate cake. Yeah. We got like the big chocolate cake at Fryer Patch. It was pretty. It was really good but oh my god it was like deathly. I actually made a reservation for us to go to Better Than Sex tonight. And while we were eating that chocolate cake I was like Ryan we cannot go to Better Than Sex tonight because all they have is dessert there like extreme desserts like chocolate cake and stuff like that. So I was like I swear if like I eat another dessert for today I will cry. So we were at Fryer Patch and like we waited like 10 minutes until our server came and like I had to like wave down someone like you know we're ready to order kind of thing.  Then she like said she was going to give us like a discount for like the inconvenience and stuff like that but she didn't.  I'm sad I straightened my hair because it's rainy. Her hair is still straight.  Saltwater tricks. Saltwater tricks teach me. You dyed her hair until the same. What? This is all virgin hair. You never been dyed. No I cut off it all. She bleached it with like broccoli. I literally cut off all my ombre it's all gone.  Dark brown. Dark brown. That's my natural hair. It's literally all cut off.  I got it done in like sophomore year of high school. It is sophomore year of college now. It's gone. We just got to the Goodwill and it's actually a Goodwill boutique. I've never ever even heard of this so I'm very interested to see what it is. It's probably going to be like a little bit more expensive but I don't know Maybe we'll just go to like the one in Obito. If this is like not good but I don't know. Might as well check it out. Are you going to miss me? I've never seen a notebook actually. But I think I'm going to do enough crying tonight. So I found this fashion illustration book which is like the best thing ever. Like I don't know I'm like not super into fashion but I've always liked to draw I now. So I would literally dye if I had this when I was like little and then I bought another frame for my gallery wall. This one's like the same price of what I got but this one's a little bigger and I don't think Hobby Lobby had a bigger size. Just in this Goodwill. The clothes are kind of like more expensive than usual but I guess they're a little nicer so. I bought a really cool fashion book and I bought a frame. Brian didn't get anything. You don't have a size either. Did you think it was cool though? Yeah it was weird. Yeah it's pretty cool. It was like kind of small though but we're going to a place like right across. It's called the Avalon. It looks really cool. Looks super trendy. It's just like a Plato's closet type thing. So it looks like they have nice clothes too. Guys branding is so important. Like look how nice this looks. It looks way better than Plato's closet and that's the only thing that dragged me into the store. This isn't the free people dress to the thing. I love American things like that. They're my favorite so I like it. You like it? It could be a dress probably. Yeah I think I could definitely call it a dress. It's so nice. Brian found this really cool All Saints jean jacket. I want to see it on you. Can you put it on? It's a little small. What? It's a little small. Do you want to put that in my purse so you don't forget it? Like you can't move? No I mean it just looks a little funny. It's like a slim fit and not slim at all. It's cool kind of. But I know what you mean jean jackets are so like like they can be really tight. You know what I mean? Like you can barely move it on. It looks cool on you. You look like someone from Greece. I'm sure it's gonna do well. Yeah. I think you have a jacket. She got a shirt, dress. It was the free people one. I got that one because I was like it's literally so cute so why not.  We are so tired. Like I feel like I've been in the car for like five hours. Is it 25 minutes? What? Is it 25 minutes? Oh. And we slept in for a show long today and it's like only five and we literally feel like we want to like pass it out. I'm so nervous. Aw. Does it feel anybody better? It's good now. But we're gonna do some errands go to Ulta, go to like a new bird to the one, go to Target, get groceries cause I have like nothing to eat. I need to get fruit or maybe I shouldn't. I don't know. Cause I'm going to Tallahassee this weekend. What? I don't know. But I'm gonna need it cause it's not like I have meal plan these next two weeks you know. Rainbow look. It's a whale. It's a rainbow. Joe Ack. Can you name the movie? We'll see. Going to Ulta to find some more sheet masks. Look at this. Sweet Tea and Lemon Peel Away Koi Mask. Pulse, pour, clog and grind. That's what I need.  We're just jamming over here. Cause music. I just went to Ulta. I got a few things. Some masks, some nice cotton pads.  Got the nice ones. And what? How do you put those in your vagina? They don't go in my vagina. They're not tampons. They're cotton pads to get my eye makeup off. But anyways, so it was, the total was $38. And I used my points. But it saved me so much money. I only had to pay $8.50. Like out of $38. Oh gosh. That would have like put a dent in my account. But blessed. That's like awesome, right? $38.00 and $8.00, you know? But we're just like making our way around like Waterford Lakes. Cause they have like a lot of shops. We're just like seeing what they have and stuff. I know there's like a Francesca's in the middle part. So I definitely want to go in there. So actually can we go there first? Then we can like finish back there. I was drinking my water and Ryan just went like boop. And then he was like, I'm sorry I didn't mean to. I'll tell him it's still raining. I am about to check out what he knew it's forever 21. Came to Waterford Lakes. It looks lit in there. I'm not the best forever 21, but it'll do. I mean, it really doesn't have that much stuff honestly. But I don't really like the place dress and I'm going to try out some running shorts cause I really like the running shorts. At the checkout line at forever 21, I found sheet masks. Literally I don't know how much I can say this. Yeah, forever 21 has sheet masks. You found more? Well I didn't buy any sheet masks. I only bought a mask thing and a mask thing. But I really like sheet masks cause they're like more moisturizing and my face is like really dry. So I like them. I think they're like $2 or something like that which is like super not bad. We were going to go to Target but I just feel like I need to like not even spend any money cause first of all I'm like leaving tomorrow for Tallahassee so I don't really need food you know in my pantry or fridge so I'll just like get the food and everything I need when I get back.  I'm so excited. Like I have so many to try. I want to try them all at once but obviously I can't and I probably shouldn't because there would be always money right? But I also need to clean up my bathroom. It is a mess. I want to show you guys this. Like the power of editing photos. Like I took like a random picture of my food. It literally wasn't even that great. Kind of like a bad picture of my food. But I decided to edit it anyways and it became Instagram worthy. Like what the heck? I didn't even think it would be an Insta.  It turned new into an Insta. It's time people. The thing you didn't do is correct. It doesn't really hurt that bad but it's like not a pleasant feeling. My skin looks actually pretty good. How did you like your face mask Ryan? Very rejuvenating. Very rejuvenating you said. Alright. Isn't it pretty? Oh yeah. We took our prom pics on here. Just getting our formal pictures. We took on the top of this parking garage right here. And people thought we took it like at a lake or something. I was like I just got that aperture on fleek though. So the background like is so blurry that you can't really see what's back there but it's like rooftops of like nothingness. But I mean it looked pretty cool. That little UCF thing over there my friends is where I used to live my freshman year. Water tower. Summer bee. In that water tower right there. Just kidding. But I live like really close to it. Hi Nike.  Thank you. We're at Fujiaminal though. And we're going to go get some late night sushi for our last meal together I'm sad.  I'm so sad. But it's okay you'll visit me and I'll visit you right? Can you promise? 24 dollar flights. 24 dollar flights? That's only like one way though.


understanding kind of hate to use the word defining, but I'm going to use it for lack of a better term defining what kind of relationship you're in, I think is the first major, maybe transition. And then if you decide that you're going to move in with each other, I can't tell you, excuse me, how many of the holistic or neurotypical partners who come to my support group are like, I don't know what you're talking about. Everything changed after we moved in with each other. Everything changed. We were either in a long distance relationship. We talked every night. We had this great connection when we would see each other. It was usually for a few days. You know, the sex was great. The conversation was great. We had so much fun that we moved in with each other. And I don't even recognize the person I'm with, right? And so being again, very clear about what you need. So do you need your own separate bedroom? Do you need your own separate office? Do you want to eat meals alone? Do you need time in the morning to have your coffee and read and whatever and how much time do you need? Again, if you're not clear about those things yourself and you're not comfortable talking with your potential partner about those things, you're going to have a lot of conflict when you move in with each other. I guarantee you, right? So being clear about looking at what you need while you're living alone or if you're living with your parents or if you're living with a roommate. What is it? What is it that brings you peace and joy? Writing that down and communicating it with your partner for both partners, right? Because for me, I didn't communicate to my ex has been that eating meals together every night was so important. And in his family, they didn't do it. Sort of the transition into housing, living together, which is, I think, something that I relate to a lot. Because I think one of the issues that I have, particularly in a lot of the relationships that I've had is making the commitment and moving and living with somebody because I feel like it's, you know, when you're in those situations where you both have your own house and stuff, there's a little bit more of a kind of a boundary between that. And I have tried moving in with someone before it was kind of during COVID. And I think it was very difficult because the time that we did spend together outside of living together, you know, is a lot more broken up. Like there was times where we'd see each other and times where we wouldn't. And so when we moved in together, it was kind of the situation where I was, I felt like they were on top of me all the time and they were wanting to have the interaction that we would have, like, when we would see each other on a less frequent basis, which is not how social batteries work, you know, so there'd be a lot of situations where I like, right, okay, I need to be on my own. Maybe like, are you okay in there? I'm like, yep, yeah, I'm good. I just need some time on my own and focus on what I need to do. And I found that really difficult. And also, you know, it was it was a situation where we didn't have separate rooms to be in stuff. So that I think that was a difficulty. Yeah, I really relate to that aspect of life milestones and stuff. I think in other aspects of life milestones is children. Yes. That's a big one. I don't have any experience with that. And I have 26 years experience with that. So yeah, I think it's a big, a big one. And you know, now that I think about it, the first apartment my ex-husband and I moved into had two bedrooms. And I think having two bedrooms. And we didn't, of course, we didn't know we were a neurodiverse couple at the time may have been a saving grace, because we made one bedroom and we made one a studio for him, because he was very creative and like to record. And so he could spend as much time as he needed to in there. And we set each other up for success without even knowing it, right? Which may have been a good thing, right? But then when we had our daughter, I have to tell you, my ex, when we were dating and getting serious, he said to me, Thomas, I don't want to have any children. And I think he knew himself better than he realized. And I said, Well, if you don't, then I'm not the right person for you. But in like a minute, he said, Oh, no, no, I'll have one. But we have to wait five years. So he gave himself that time, right? And I'm like, Okay, I can wait five years. Remember, we were like 21 years old, 22. So the five turned into nine years that we waited. And it was because he was never ready. And so I think for your listeners, it's really important to listen to your partner. If they say they don't want to have children, believe them, right? Don't pressure them into having children, right? So I think that's really important. And then think about what you can do to prepare if you both agree you're going to have children. You know, when is it going to be? And what can you do to prepare? Because there are going to be constant changes literally minute by minute throughout your day. Any routine that you thought you had and was important to your well-being is probably going to go out the door. And if you are not flexible with your routine, it's going to create conflict with your partner, right? So I do have to give my ex-husband credit because during the first few years of our daughter's life, he created a beautiful routine for her. And because he was able to do that, it was good for both of them. Now, I didn't have the same routine, right? But he regimented her, maybe without even realizing it. So I think in the early years, having a partner who can kind of routinize what can be routinized, like feeding schedules and sleeping schedules and bathing schedules can be really helpful. But having that discussion is really critical, right? The other thing I think is a lot of times, you know, I babysat for years and years and years. So I knew how to change a baby's diaper and how to bathe a baby and all that stuff. And my ex had never done all that. So to have that conversation ahead of time, like who's going to take on what responsibilities and how can we share them? Who's going to wake up in the middle of the night when the baby is crying? Because that's going to happen every single night, maybe multiple times, who's going to feed the baby? And then you have to think about the sensory sensitivities too. Because I have had neurodiverse couples talk about how one partner, usually it's the autistic partner, may have a sensitivity to water and splashing. And so they're not able to bathe the kids or it's very difficult.  The smells or the touch of things and babies stuff and eat it and put it in their mouths and you don't know where it's been. So there's a lot of things that you cannot even prepare for, but having a discussion about what you feel comfortable doing and what you are willing to learn how to do. I think it's really important. Otherwise, you're going to be in a lot of conflict. Hey, YouTube, hope you have enjoyed this podcast clip so far. If you want to check out the full episode, you can find it here on my YouTube channel under the podcast section, or you can go to Spotify, Apple, Google to check it out on different podcasting streaming services. If you have enjoyed this video this far, please make sure to like, perhaps drop me subscribe if you want to see some more content from me and drop a comment down below, even if it's something simple like an emoji or a heart. It really does help satisfy those big YouTube algorithm gods in the sky. Anyway, I'll let you go back to it. So that's a big transition where, yeah, I hear a lot of couples talking about, and it's usually the allistic partner that says, I feel like I'm taking on too much responsibility. But if your partner has never babysat or they've never been with children before, you have an opportunity to teach them, right, rather than get angry at them. And maybe you take a parenting class together and you figure out together what you can each do that you feel comfortable with and where you may need your parents to come in or siblings or friends to help, whether it's with teaching or transitions.  And it's okay to ask for help. So, yeah, having a child can change everything literally overnight, Thomas. Yeah, yes, and create a lot of terrifying. I think it is for a lot of people in general, but then if you're dealing with neurodiversity, there's just so many things that you can't prepare for. And I did a podcast with a woman who is autistic and she was eight months pregnant. And she talked about the pregnancy piece as an autistic woman and how that impacted her and how the healthcare system was not prepared to hear her needs and to hear the challenges she was having because of her neurotype. And that's a whole other podcast probably. But, you know, that's important too for those folks that do choose to get pregnant, whether they're non-binary or female at birth, you know, you have to have a healthcare team that understands what you need. So, children is a big one.  I know one of the things that I realized quickly was my ex went on one field trip and that field trip caused him so much stress because one of the little kids started running away from the group. He said, I will never go on a field trip again. I will never volunteer in the classroom. I will not have anything to do with other people's kids. And again, I didn't understand what was happening. And so all that responsibility was on my shoulders, but I loved doing that. So I didn't see it as a burden. But I think as your children get older and they have their own point of view and they need more from you, being clear about kind of who is going to take what responsibilities and which are really important to share. Like we would share homework assistance and that kind of stuff. Because I'm just kind of thinking about myself personally because, you know, for a good portion of my life up until this point, I kind of, I don't really want kids. I have enough kind of on my plate with my mental health and like things that I'm doing at the moment, which I feel would be exacerbated. I still find just the concept of living with another person quite difficult. I think, you know, it's something that I'm a lot more open to. I don't think it's something that I would want to do for a while, have kids. But I'm also, you know, if I was to have kids, I think it would be, you know, it would be ideal for me if I could get a kind of a stable income and perhaps have less responsibilities in that area that perhaps I could manage that. But again, it's like it's the communication aspect of that. Because some people might be like, yeah, I'd love to take care of the kids more and you can work more. Right. But that would be a situation where I'd be like, might be a bit more open to it. It's just, you know, definitely it's not something that I feel I can handle at this time in my life. But it's, you know, it's, it is something to think about definitely. Yeah. And isn't that great that you can be that honest with yourself?  She is absolutely 100% certain about that. And her girlfriend doesn't either. So they're both in agreement on that. So, you know, if you have a partner who wants to have children and you're pretty adamant, you don't. Of course, that can be a deal breaker, right? So that's something you need to discuss before you move in with each other or you start talking about. Not on the first date though. Right. On the first date. Maybe. You want kids? She's going to get married. Well, you know what? I mean, I think people are discussing those things up front, maybe not on the first date.  If you don't want to have kids and they do, even though you're, you know, getting along well, you're having a good time. I don't think it's fair to expect that you would change your mind down the road because it's something that they really want. You know, I don't know that my ex husband should have had kids. I mean, not that he wasn't a good father in the beginning of our daughter's life, but I think it took him off his career trajectory. I do think it affected other areas of his, you know, mental and emotional health and it affected mine. I had postpartum depression for two years. So you never know. You never know what's going to happen. And you never know what kind of child you're going to have, right? You know, you never know if your child's going to have any kind of physical disabilities or developmental disabilities or if our daughter had colic for seven months. I literally cried every night at seven o'clock nonstop for several hours. It was very challenging. So you can't prepare for that stuff, Thomas. So I think another major transition, too, is family, extended family issues. So I've heard, especially for older couples, you know, in their forties and beyond where there may be a family member, a parent who needs assistance. And so that may take you away from your relationship or the children or what have you. Or there might be some monetary needs that the parents might have. And, you know, dealing with that, that could be a major challenge in a relationship. So I think, you know, I think most couples experience the empty nest syndrome, which happens when your children grow up and they either go to college or they move out on their own. And I think for a lot of neurodiverse couples, that becomes a time when they realize major, major, major differences that had kind of been covered up because they were both working. They were taking care of the kids or one of them had more responsibility for the kids, whatever. And then they look at each other. The focus is all on the kids, isn't it? It's kind of a self-sacrificing kind of thing. And with that also comes your needs and his person needs. I suppose when it all kind of goes away again, it's eliminated. It's a bit more kind of to the surface. Yes. Plus about the practical looking after the kids and making sure they're safe and making sure they're teaching them. And I can imagine that, yeah. I see a lot of neurodiverse couples, and I'm sure a lot of couples in general that get to that point and they haven't really nurtured the relationship at the level they needed to. Or they haven't really sought to understand each other's needs and wants and dreams. And, you know, so the relationship may end if they're not able to recommit to each other.


The completion of the Afghanistan withdrawal is nothing to celebrate. The US has officially announced the completion of its military withdrawal from Afghanistan, minus of course the CIA ops, which will continue in that country, and the bombs that will likely continue to rain down in the name of fighting terrorism. There are a lot of warmongers rending their garments over the termination of a decades-long military occupation, in which accomplished nothing besides making war profiteers wealthy and killing hundreds of thousands of people.  Pride, praise, and celebration are not the appropriate emotional response to the day. The appropriate response to a decades-overdue withdrawal from a war that should never have happened in the first place, is rage. Unmitigated rage at an unforgivable atrocity which amassed a mountain of corpses for no legitimate reason, from which the region will probably not recover in our lifetime. Unmitigated rage at those responsible for starting and maintaining this horror all this time. This is not something that Biden should be applauded for. Nobody deserves praise or credit for ending a 20-year disaster, especially when they helped start it. Nobody applauds the mass shooter for finally setting down the rifle and surrendering. Every single Allied soldier who died in Afghanistan died in vain.  This is also the reason every Afghan soldier and Afghan civilian was killed during that time. They all died in vain. We shouldn't concoct sugary fairy tales about this. We should try to prevent it from happening again. Who knows where Afghanistan would be had the U.S. and its allies stayed out of the nation two decades ago. Who knows where they have been had the U.S. not begun arming the Mujahideen against the Soviet Union four decades ago. We will never know what could have been for those people. The opportunity to find out was taken away from them. Stolen forever. And of course no lessons were learned from this by anyone who will be making decisions about the actions that will be taken by the most powerful military force in history. America's bloated military budget will continue to swell and its arsenal and that of its allies will pivot toward new enemies. The only sane response to all this is rage and disgust and a firm commitment to trying to end this madness.