I feel like there's something missing someone who's not here at this party we found another big thank you for Dan Hennigan welcome to Julie Mackey's Memorial celebration of life I want to thank each of you for making the special effort of being here this evening I have wanted to do this without notes and I tried over and over and I couldn't do it so bear with me and hopefully I'll get through this I especially want to thank the Art Center and the Santa Lorenzo Valley Women's Club for their contributions to this evening isn't this great Linda Levy and Sheila Delaney are two individuals that really spearheaded the Art Center and the Valley Women's Club to bring us all here this evening thank you Sheila thank you Linda we're joined here this evening because Julie Mackey died of lymphoma on July 22nd at 2 14 in the morning Julie always did like to stay up late we chose today to honor Julie because it is also her birthday and it serves as a poignant reminder of her life Julie would have been 69 years young today well most of you know Julie as an artist a kind and gentle soul full of life and whimsy but most of you may not know Julie the fighter the gladiator the warrior woman I want to share that other Julie with you this evening as she fought for her life that she loved so much the best way to do that is to answer the question that everyone asks what happened it's been the 800 pound gorilla in the room from diagnosis to death Julie lived 16 months during that time she had six different chemotherapy regimes each regime had multiple treatments each treatment took a week of hospitalization then two weeks off back to the hospital and do it all over again each new regime was required because Julie's cancer kept relapsing with each new relapse her odds for survival went down while her risk for going forward grew greater and yet each time Julie decided to fight the fight she did so because she had so much to live for she had her two boys their three boys each of you and me Julie's decision to keep fighting were not easy to make for the entire 16 months she lived with constant abdominal pain extreme fatigue nausea no taste no appetite she could no longer eat foods she loved she forced herself to drink and sure what she despised she had to consume three liters of water a day all the while being nauseated she had a central line which each day before showers had to be covered with saran wrap and taped which she hated she needed blood transfusions IV medications fluids several times a week and that was what when she wasn't in the hospital with each chemo treatment Julie got weaker and sicker and yet she decided to keep fighting Julie was also staged and had stem cells collected for bone marrow transplant it was her only chance of survival the night before going to the hospital for a minimum of four to eight weeks the transplant was canceled she had too much tumor burden to go forward a turning point decision was at hand continue treatment in hopes of getting a transplant or stop and die in two to three months again Julie chose to fight for herself her family and for each of you in April of this year after several more chemo regimes Stanford gave up on Julie and told her to go into hospice or find a trial therapy so in May Julie got a second opinion at UCSF Medical Center where a high-risk high dose chemotherapy was proposed at the same time she arranged to go to MD Anderson in Texas to be evaluated for an experimental drug therapy this time the choices were even more excruciating and stark doing nothing and die do a trial for which you are given zero odds because there is no data or attempt an extremely dangerous and difficult chemo treatment requiring a minimum 30-day hospitalization a 15% chance of success and a 30% chance of death from the treatment once again Julie decided to fight on she chose the high-risk chemo at UCSF knowing it was going to make her sicker than ever before and she may die from it but she chose it because it gave her the best chance to live it was her only remaining hopes for getting a transplant so on June 11th to July 7th Julie underwent high-risk chemo she suffered mightily and not only survived but the prognosis was good for getting her to transplant quickly we didn't know it but unfortunately that wasn't to be during Julie's follow-up discharge visit she agreed to implement plans to continue her fight these were needed in the event that her tumor burden had not shrunk enough to qualify her for a transplant at UCSF thus Julie was scheduled to go to Seattle for an experimental tandem transplant evaluation and also to be evaluated for a phase one experimental drug program at UCSF throughout all of this Julie had once again girded herself to continue her fight for life but out of nowhere on Thursday July 12th my birthday Julie developed a large lump on her chest within four hours by 5 a.m. on Friday she was in the emergency room at UCSF by Saturday at 2 30 in the afternoon I was told Julie was terminal and would only live two to three days there were no more options the rapid and massive tumor growth so soon after such high-dose chemo met no trial or treatment center would take her turns out Julie had a strain of chemo resistant cancer cells that actually thrive on chemo the more you give it the faster it grows and that is exactly what happened to the extent that a week later our little Julie when she died she looked as though she was pregnant with twins when I told Julie that Saturday when I held Julie that Saturday to tell her the end was near she was already fading in and out of consciousness it took us over an hour but she spoke of her fight and her desire to continue fighting but in a different way she said she was tired but relieved to have nothing more she could do to fight for her life any longer she also hoped her last days would be free of pain she had struggled against for so long but tragically that wish was not to be for the entire seven days that Julie was in palliative care at UCSF she increasingly suffered and died in agony until her very last and final moments but because of all the pain and suffering she had endured she wanted to continue her fight for others Julie's Julie was an organ donor ever since the little pink dots for driver's licenses in California became available but she wanted to do even more Julie wanted her remains to go to medical research and education she said and I quote she hoped in some small way she could help someone else not have to suffer as much as she had regrettably the ogre the organ donor registry due to the extent of her lymphoma rejected Julie but after much difficulty on July 25th Julie sons and I succeeded in donating her remains to the UCSF will body program for medical research and education at the conclusion of their investigations Julie's remains will be cremated and spread at sea beneath the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco so tonight you have learned of Julie you've learned of a Julie Mackie you may not have known all five foot four hundred and three pounds of unrelenting kryptonite steel throughout for her zest and zeal and fight for life the fighter the gap the gladiator the woman warrior Julie Mackie before you begin your stories about the life and times of the other Julie we all know so well there's a very special person that I want to thank from Julie's heart and mine Dr. David Resnick Sanis for the entire 16 months there was hardly a day that went by that I did not speak to Dr. Dave about Julie's care whether it was big picture or small David was always there to provide feedback about the hot shots about what the hot shots were or more importantly were not doing all the while David's soul focus was what was best for Julie and especially how to keep her as safe and comfortable as possible throughout her ordeal there are no sufficient words to thank you David but perhaps Julie says best you are a chin and now for the fun part the circle of memories this is the evening's main event because it is Julie's favorite part whenever she went to someone's memorial she loved to tell and hear the stories so now each of you can share your stories or comments about what it's like to share your life and times with Julie take your time remember to breathe but most of all please make us laugh or cry it's up to you if anyone doesn't want to be on Santa Cruz community television just say you don't want to be you don't want to be recorded and the camera will be turned off what is most important is that you feel comfortable to speak your mind and to share your memories with all of us this should not be hard given Julie's way of saying whatever was on her mind to anyone at any time I'm sure we are in for some real zingers so here's one of Julie's hand-built mobs for you to hold and have with you as you speak when you are done please pass it to the next speaker we also have been asked to use this cordless microphone it does not amplify it just helps the camera record your comments who would like to go first pretty tired because I've been working all day the reality is I've learned more about Julie probably the last six or seven months and I knew before because in my business which is pharmacy is mostly you probably know or some of you do people ask me hey do you know so-and-so they live in Boulder Creek and I say well if they're not sick I probably don't know well that was kind of the case with Julie because you know she had a couple prescriptions from now and then and same for Joe so I'd only see him on rare occasions and and although over the last six months or so I got to know Joe pretty good and we have a way of describing certain patients customers that require a little more little more time you know so they can be contributed referred to as nuisance customers you know I'm not going to put go there with Joe I will say this is a lot of you that know Joe when he calls either in person or by telephone you better have your thinking cap on tune out everything else because this guy is one sharp individual and I will say from my observations and dealings with him that after a short time I was so impressed with his knowledge about Julie's condition I think at some point he probably knew more than a lot of the doctors did about her pharmaceutical care about different aspects and if anybody if he could have moved heaven and earth he would have done it he showed that every time I go I don't know how you get it man because I need my six six and a half hours of sleep and I know you didn't do that and I know that Thursday that you had a drive to UCSF and get you got there I think at 5 a.m. or roughly you know and I know because I talked to you that afternoon and you went through both you and Julie went through a lot of highs and lows and there were times when you were out would be a little bit optimistic and then all of a sudden it'd be a rough patch and somehow with you and between the two of you which just watching this video came to realize boy you scored I'll tell you that I had no idea and I think a lot but so anyway I don't want to take up everybody's time here you know I can ramble on on as you can any staff will tell you but I do want to I want to say first of all that Joe never entered the nuisance stage of the customer and in such a pet way that we sometimes add on what we call a nuisance fee but no actually I enjoyed our encounters a I thrive on just gaining more knowledge and doing what help I can even though when I know my hands are tied in a lot of aspects and resources limited and there wasn't a heck of a lot but but I'll tell you what if anybody had a chance you know this is the guy you want fighting behind him and obviously from what I saw and from what I heard Julie was the type of gladiator you described and not only that I never realized the talent she has I can't draw a stick figure but I do appreciate talent in others my children my children's friends some are very artistic my wife her let's see left half the brain is more dominant than right which is my situation but anyway I I just want to say Joe you inspired me a great deal and Julie's memories are obviously gonna live on a very positive way my mother is a lot of people here I'm sure want to speak okay this hat I'm wearing is from sort of an erotic ball that there were a lot of them in the early 80s and Sheila and I went to a couple of them but one of the funniest stories I ever heard was when Joe and Julie went to one in San Francisco and I wasn't there I can only and it's all in my imagination which is perhaps better yet they pushed a brass bed the hookers ball they pushed it into the middle of the auditorium as I remember it and I'm not sure what happened next but it was in my imagination one of the funniest things ever it's a fond memory of a place that I wasn't that heard about yeah okay who's gonna take over this is this is the t-shirt from when Joe was was running for supervisor that was any but that's sort of a Julie story oh Sheila and Julie designed the back of it I think you know so yeah we did a lot of crazy stuff and including t-shirts and driving around in my 1936 international truck with loudspeakers and a piano or somebody in a piano on the back side playing away and haranguing the populace we went I know we that we went through Santa Cruz at times not sure why I guess the Fifth District went into Santa Cruz I want to I want to have this on and you don't need to stand up it's on you were gonna say something you don't have to stand up you can just sit out if you want no I rather stand okay I don't know if anybody in this room has known Julie as long as I have we started out in the Arts Center in LA and my husband and her husband were friends and so of course Julie and I met and it was the instant Julie just gathered me into her fantasy you know she just drew you and we we remained friends I will say that the wealth in my life is my friends and those who have stayed in support of me and Julie was right on the top of that list boy am I gonna miss her but I swear she is gonna be talking to me anyway she speaks to me in my work because my work is inspired by her enthusiasm and her encouragement I've written a program for educating people with the visual arts and everybody here in this community as a matter of fact is part of that and I just want to say that when we were in New York after going to school we all went to New York you know big deal and with the big agencies you know our husbands in the big agencies and we had to show our our artistic power and so therefore when we went to parties which there were a lot of them of course you know we'd dress up and Julie stole the show she would walk in well you know she just cut she just cut a great figure and I was amazed how such a beautiful and stunning personality could be friendly the common Bonnie you know I was from the Midwest we had a great friendship all through the years we kept in touch they went to England we went to Australia it's it was been an exciting life but I will say this her sons are my sons don't you ever forget and she was a gladiator I'm a Viking that's what I admired about her this cute little thing this beautiful little thing with the power and strength and I have to say to Joe the last time I see Julie saw Julie I realized that I didn't have the courage to sit by her side and I'm very grateful you were there every inch of the way her courage her willingness to fight on and that's what I remember and that's what you focused and that's who she was now I had ideas of wearing something also yeah okay and so I wore something this is an old t-shirt it's not about Joe Kichera but it is about standing out from the herd and you know what most of the people I know here in this room have done that distinguished themselves in community you know the time is such that we as elders now must stand up we must that's the message she stood for things she stood she stood because she was strong because she knew her heart and I hope that we all follow our hearts and get involved and be part of our communities and help them grow help the person who needs a casserole next door help those who are fighting to keep our communities and our values together that's what Julie would say she would just continue and I believe that her work continues in my work and I think that's the way it is with all of us I'm proud to have had her as a friend I couldn't have been more blessed Julie who's next I don't want to wait and wait because I'm just I don't know what I'm gonna say really I didn't have anything prepared because it goes back so far with Julie that when we I graduated from Santa Rosa Valley High School here in town and then I was gone for a while school and travel and such and such and when I came back one of the first people I connected with was Julie Mackie and first we were setting up a pottery and she was an artist and we just had parallel hives in so many ways our kids started out of Redwood Open School way up there on Big Basin Way and then we graduated on to you know Boulder Creek community events and arts and I mean through it all though the main thing was just our excitement about clay I mean we just Julie had this great sense of humor and it totally came out in everything she made and luckily I have a couple of pieces that I treasure and for Dan and I just Julie was just such a made major part of of the community the political thing the arts when I just remember when we got here at the Art Center and we opened our doors and Julie was just beaming and it's just like whoa nobody thought we were gonna do this so you know in the early days there weren't a lot of people I mean it's grown and grown and grown but you know we had no committee so we volunteer to do shows and so every year I do a show and I'd always called Julie and she'd be yeah yeah let's let's make it happen her enthusiasm was always right there she'd come down here we'd be up here putting stuff all around the art center and making these shows happen and her enthusiasm was just always positive and she was a gladiator and in the way she lived her life and in her full embrace of everything that there was a possibility and opportunity of doing so anyway I'm just rambling on too but her her enthusiasm for clay I think lives on through the art center and the strong clay program we have here she was part of you know making sure that that went forward and I'll always remember her for that my name is Roberta McPherson and I met Julie because our kids went to the same school it started out as University of the Trees school and then became Evergreen school it was a great place that the kids had opportunity to learn from a lot of people and one of those people was Julie and it's fitting that I'm holding a mug because she helped my daughter make a mug and we still have that mug today and it's one of our special treasured things because art is just a foreign language to me and she spoke it so well and she shared it with my daughter and my daughter did beautiful art and I just was always so amazed and Julie was so patient and enthusiastic with all of the kids getting them involved in their artwork and that it wasn't until later that I really got to know Joe but from the very beginning of the time at school Julie just was a wonderful gift to all those kids including my daughter and including me we have a mug like this at home and I'm afraid if I hold it I'll break it so were you hold it so I don't have to think about it while I'm talking thank you I don't know I guess I've known Julie since 76 it's hard to remember it's like you've known I remember watching her drive down a hill I known her for a couple years in a red sweater we were like meeting to do something with the kids probably and I was struck how beautiful she was just that I never said anything to her and in the hospital I guess we were the last people she really talked to before she died and she looked just so beautiful and the quality was just like okay I ran into Julie and we're at the art center and everybody's talking we go out on the bench and just talk a while and catch up and that would often happen and how much she loved Joe and that we would be there for him how proud we always did the family first how proud she was of her boys and that they were really really good fathers and and it just made her feel so good inside knowing that and she loved her grandchildren but really loved them because of their fathers I think and that you two were friends and how much that meant to her and then she talked about my step son Erin and Damien and he were inseparable and my daughter Mariah who Damien helped raise who became a ceramicist I think because of her time with Julie and all the wonderful ceramics in our house I think she instilled that love in her and then we talked about what happens when you die and what she believed in what I believed in we pretty much believed the same thing so that was not a long conversation seriously and and a book she'd read that reminded her something of me and she wanted to get the book to me and a friend and give it to her but she couldn't remember the title so you know we went to the alphabet that didn't help both being older and conversation could have happened at any time and it struck me how much I enjoyed her every every time I was with her I enjoyed her for my husband's six-tooth birthday she and Joe made him this hat out of paper there was about this high an entire coat to wear at a fold of paper where he looked like some kind of African king I mean you know this is somebody here so there was the artist in her and the way she lived her life was as an artist she knew what was important and that's what made me cry in those pictures because that smile on Julie's face and everyone is hmm that's interesting what do you think of that there was this kind of piece it gave her inside that I really really enjoyed about her and I'm just wish she was here and it makes me wonder like I want to do this one I'm still here but it doesn't happen that way I guess just a shirt with the Joe Kuchera shirt I could go on and on but it's it's just wonderful and thank you for letting me speak so long and my name is Kathy and I met Julie and Joe when I was probably 19 years old and a student at UCSC I was I don't want to go on because there's so much about her that I remember and can think of and of course the first story I thought of I thought oh no you shouldn't tell that story and then I thought Julie would want me to tell that I don't even know if she knows it but I was dating a guy who I met my second year at UC Santa Cruz I think and he was kind of crazy and wild and he was Joe's campaign manager his name was Randy I don't know if any of you remember him but he would spend you know instead of studying or doing all the things he was supposed to do he was always up in this valley you know campaigning putting up lawn signs handing out bumper stickers doing all of that and one night he comes home and he's got this pink box and there is a black negligee in it and you know I'm a UCSC student we don't wear a black negligee and I said where did this come from and he says well you know I was working with Joe all day and at the end of the day he said we had to stop at this store because he had to buy something for Julie and he apparently goes there all the time and buys her something and it works for him so I thought I always remember it and I always say that negligee no other man has ever bought me a piece of lies. So just on a little bit more thoughtful note you know I was thinking about Julie and you know all the things that people have touched on that are so special about her and you know the things that stood out the most for me was you know I think someone in one of the little articles or what I read that I read called her quirky and I thought well what does that really mean and I thought well when Julie it meant she could look at a person a child a piece of art or with me like a piece of campaign literature and she could always find what was really interesting and unique about it and that was such a special thing it was always fun to run things by her because she'd have such an amazing take on it and that was such a great quality and the other thing I thought of was how you know kind she was and I saw it up here with all of you how kind she was I saw when I had my kids I had two boys and we really connected I think over that with her having two boys but you know the night the second one came home she and Joe came over and cooked us dinner and it wasn't like a casserole left on your door it was like they came in they cooked fettuccine we had dessert it was like going to a restaurant in your own home it was so thoughtful and she gave me these when each child was born a little candle holder which was on every birthday cake till they were 18 years old which I brought with me they're so special she was just a really thoughtful person and then the final quality that was really strong about Julie and that I'll always remember and treasure was her intense loyalty she was so loyal to you Joe you know never seen anybody talk about a fighter when you were in office and people are after you she was just a rock and and for me too when I worked for you later and you know sometimes things were always easy it was she was really intensely loyal and always to the boys and to the valley she loved all of you so much and so anyway and I I guess I should wrap up I just think the last thing I would say when I think of those qualities of that kind of quirkiness and generosity and loyalty it's really you know what I see in this room too I mean you are a reflection of her and she's a reflection of you and it's really special. It's something about the I'm Nancy Macy. Used to campaign for Joe Kuchera for supervisor. A little my favorite campaign meetings were the very few that we had at Joe's house because it was such a great place to go to nestled in beautiful verdant area and filled with art and joy and we had two of those incredible little candle holders and they're in an exhibit back there right there we had the goat and the fish because Andrew wasn't born yet and by the time he was born somehow I missed the third regret that terribly because in the earthquake of 89 they were in a place of honor on shelves above the kitchen sink so they became myriad pieces of clay back to their former nature totally broken in little pieces and so that that was the worst part about the earthquake it wasn't the destroyed fireplace or you know the other problems it was losing Julie's beautiful art and one of our favorite times was with Joe and Julie and Lyndon Shanmore and Ken and I got to go down to Saratoga to Julie's show there how many years ago is that maybe not quite that long but anyway it was a great show and that was when I really got to know her big art she she was so much a part of her art it could be incredibly profound and serious when you looked at like one face or one facet of this huge woman always colorful and then the other side was so damn funny really sexy and it was she was just all those things so I'm I know we're having fun thinking about her and remembering her but you know what else she did she used to be a part of the phone tree for the Valley Women's Club this was before emails and when we needed to call people and get a message out she was one of the people that called eight other people who called eight other people to get the word out and she walked proudly down the middle of Highway 9 for the Highway 9 safety campaign we shut down Highway 9 we walked from Boulder Creek a Ben Lohman market to Highlands Park to tell people goddamn it's slow down this is our neighborhood street you don't get to go so fast and so she was a part of those things too she's really a part of our lives and a part of the Valley gonna miss her next hi my name is Rebecca and we bought a house on Clear Creek in 92 and we hadn't even moved there we had a horticulturist go to look at the trees and this neighbor of the street Lorraine Ross saw his car there and it's like who's moving there who's moving there tell me about them what what are they like and he gave him this he gave her the scoop and she was really excited because we had all kids the same ages and I was living we were living in Saratoga at the time and we get this message on our machine and we're so excited you're moving to Clear Creek and you can come this weekend or next weekend or whatever you want for dinner was like wow this is intense it's pretty amazing so of course we said yes and we went and there were the Rosses and there was Joe and Julie we hadn't even moved in yet and Joe and Julie were there to greet us and welcome us amazing totally amazing and that's how we got to meet Julie and got to meet Joe and got to know over time Joe's incredible martinis which I still want to save her in and that's something I always think of Julie is I almost came with a martini glass because she loved Joe's martinis which were all different wonderful and I'll never forget her coming to a large Fourth of July party and offering to do painting for faces and came with all the supplies but little did she know that I'm like almost every kid in adult and I mean there were so amazing she I think she painted faces for five hours you know and she was totally involved with each individual and really sensitive to who they were and laughing and having amazing conversations and I'd really never seen anything like it it was amazing and a really special thing for me was when she did the show at our gallery we had a gallery in Saratoga and her art was all around the space Joe worked real hard to set it all up and to be in the field of Joe Julie Mackie's work for two months was amazing because every day there'd be new aspects new elements new things that I would see and appreciate and appreciate her sense of humor you know she's such warm and lovely and beautiful person with such an amazing sense of humor and so I just still appreciate that experience very very much and have a lot of love for her thank you hi I'm Valerie and I'm the tenant at Joe and Julie's house I moved in there oh it's been about 15 years once I got in there yeah they've had a hard time it's a fabulous place at Joe's and Julie's house it's a beautiful piece of property and it's such a nice lifestyle to live this way in a gorgeous house the architecture inside is absolutely beautiful every way you look I never ever get tired of it or take it for granted and all around the house is a beautiful garden beautiful garden and Julie loved to work in the garden and one of my favorite memories of Julie is coming home and and I pull up after working all day and she I'd hear this voice going oh Valery I can't do Valery and somewhere in the garden behind a tree under a bush upon a ladder somewhere would be Julie and and she'd welcome me home and I'd go over and have a little chat with her about what was going on and she'd be clipping away and brushing things up and raking things the whole time I'd just be sitting there enjoying the beautiful scene and and the ambience of the place I'm really I can think of a couple things that I'm I'm always and forever grateful to Julie for she what the first thing is I've been there about a year was my birthday and and she gave me one of the best birthday presents I ever got she gave me a rake and she put a little to do a little heart on it and she drew my name on it and it's it's one of these fans I'd never had a rake of my very own and it's a really nice rake it has a little clip you can clip it up and it comes up nice and compact and you can put it away or you can take it out and it's it's a wonderful gadget and I've always used it all these years it's still almost like new it works really great so I'm I'm forever grateful for that it's one of my prized possessions the other the other thing is one day I came home to the house and on the on the on my door was pasted a little article from a newspaper it was just taped on there so I looked at it and Julie had put it there it was it was an article about a hula festival up in Pleasanton and she had heard that I had lived in Hawaii when I was was young and so she thought maybe I'd be interested in the hula festival so I thought well I didn't know anything about this or what it might be but I thought okay I'll go check out the hula festival it's a fabulous thing it happens every year in Pleasanton the first week in November just one dance after another after another gorgeous flowers live musicians incredible and so after that I was like well maybe I could start taking hula that looks like fun and another person at work that I knew was kind of thinking along the same line so we sort of talked to each other into it so it's been ten years now and I've been dancing ever since then so she's really really changed my life that way I'm I really miss Julie it's really hard going to the house and looking all around that the garden and but it's also very joyous because it's beautiful I feel very connected with her out there and she's a lot of time out there many years and there's all these little plants and little corners of different times of year that pop up that you didn't even notice before suddenly you notice and so I'm kind of thinking well you know Julie might be gone but somewhere in the sediment of this little spot of nature there will be a little layer of Julie that will always always be there I can always tune it right now I'm I'm Judy Dexter Brown and Judy Dexter Brown is here like in spirit and she said please stand up and say for me that she or such a memory that she has of of course all her white elephant parties that she'd have but she said when she reminded me and wanted to reiterate that she was so grateful for Julie and Joe's compassion for her during her ordeal that she went through with her own husband losing him Bob Brown and she said Joe and Julie were so supportive for me and they came up and they brought food just like some other people were saying and they just really were there with her through that and she so appreciates it so that's from Judy Dexter Brown I can talk to the microphone but I can't talk straight to you this is difficult Valerie gave me a segue because I was able to live next door to Joe and Julie for four or five wonderful years it is the place that is no words just a wonderful place to be you just feel it you see it you feel it my first recollection of Joe and Julie was at the spring fair in Santa Cruz in the 70s Earth Day Paula was there Joe and Julie were selling Julie's pottery and I believe I fell in love with Julie's pottery at that point and Mary brought to mind a piece that I bought do I have I'm going to tell you it was called kiss my ass sit on my face it was it was two sculptured man and woman one with the strawberry head and one with the pineapple head very exquisite pieces I've continued to care you hold what this is in front of your grandkids Julie just wonderful wonderful memories of a wonderful woman and and Joe my head's off to you thank you thank you for all good Sheila when after we move we moved here from San Jose like a lot of people did and started a store in Boulder Creek and I can remember walking past Bear Creek Mercantile and seeing these wonderful crazy pottery pieces in the window and thinking this is one brave person who makes these and I think the first piece I bought was one that was a little bird that Julie had made and that Gail had embroidered a small satin bag for it to go into I still have it and what I could afford was those birthday candle holders that are on the cake back there and many years later I was at Julie's house and I saw this this square owl up on a shelf and I said what's that she said oh I never finished that I said I'd like that I'll buy it she said okay I said whenever you finish it I'll buy it Joe has told me today that that took many hours to paint so it is a treasure years but I cherish that piece I think that I mean we had been involved in politics in San Jose in marijuana decriminalization if you want to know but but when we came here we got involved in politics that was fun with Joe and Julie we stood on street corners with balloons and said you know go out and vote go out and vote it was it was politics that was fun and engaging and interesting and involving and that's how I think it ought to be and if it isn't then it's not how it ought to be and I honor you for all the work you've done and all the fighting you've done I mean I know you fought for those of us in Love Creek and I know how you fought for Julie and I think I better stop now because I'm going to cry following up on what Nancy Macy said as the emergency preparedness director at that point I was get phone calls saying a good example the water district is once it we have a tremendous freeze and we have to have everybody drip their water faucets so the pipes will remain open so I called Julie because I didn't know who else to call and she was doing it all and she had to call all the neighborhood coordinators to alert them that they had to drip their faucets well I'll be damned but the next day the water district called again you can't have them drip their faucets for running out of water so she went back and did the same thing all over again and we made it through that the other thing I want to say is I just find Joe Kichara has been really really gone way above and beyond in having this look at all of us who have gotten together who haven't seen each other in many a year we don't even recognize each other in some cases but it's wonderful Joe and I know it was hard as hell to do this but it certainly is appreciated by all of us thank you would you pass that over to her please I don't want to do this so I'm a friend of Julie's sorry I yeah my mom and her I'm honored I'm lucky because I've known her all my life we on my mother was best friends with her mother and her father stayed at my mom and dad's house when when he moved out here for Michigan with his wife and her mom her bear with me her dad died when he was only 26 and so Julie's mom had one little baby that was under stomach and two children to raise as a single mom and some of Julie's family that go back that far have been and passed through here tonight so I grew up with her sort of I grew up kind of following her and so I've known her on my life and she's she's been a given you know how you have people in your life that are givens and we never thought twice about whether we loved each other or or where we were going we just joined when we were in New York City together with Damian Josh's father we just did things because they made us happy and that was kind of her spirit you know she'd be busy doing something and then and then I inherited the part and what I do with her I wouldn't part with her whatever happened to her after me was important and she taught me how to sew and I taught her how to dress and and and we just we just were very sympathico in all her life it was the case and I don't have anything magical to say because because it all was very simple what I didn't realize and which is really important is the depth of her commitment to her art and to be here and have realized the growth that Julie made because I would go every time I would go into the house to be something you know again ten feet tall and and and I think one of the things bear with me on this one of the things that I experienced recently was when we went to a pottery show in in Mason Center is that what it's called for Mason and Julie looked at all the work that was there she realized how much Joe had meant to her in terms of being able to help her assemble put together construct figure out how these goddamn things were gonna hold up I mean he figured out the temperature of the kiln you know what I mean and then we had like half a body and then we had a head and and Joe was like there and then he mount them on the wall and they're all over the house so they had this collaboration where she created and then he was able to kind of actually bring it all together and and so she she missed it at that at that time and and just I think really realized how much she missed him when he had to take care of his family back east and and I then started to realize that she had a world that had nothing to do with me you know and I know the people that were important Dave you were Dr. Dave amazingly important helping us this I just shut up I already had her but Caroline anyway I I several years ago built myself a shed you know it's like 10 feet tall in the back and so on to store surfboards for my children myself well over the last few years a shed's been converted into a studio little by little I lost all my storage and my wife now has hobbies that kind of reflect Julie's love for creating things you know and so forth so I I do totally understand what Joe had to go through and been hanging some of that stuff up and banging your head on it when it wasn't high enough and so on but my wife you know her sciatica's flared up she would have loved to be here and and see some of this because she's a real art lover and I have become one myself so that's all I wanted to say but now I'm getting tired I got a peel where'd you go Ken thank you all my name is Ken Ares I have never done this before and but I did want to say how much I appreciate the generosity of Julie and Joe letting me come into their home as a awkward 13 year olds as it became friends with Joshua and talk about somebody who can see beyond the artifice see beyond the pretensions you know anytime you talk to Julie she'd ask you the right question after it she would she would hear through what you were saying and actually understand where you're coming from how do you walk down your your walkway at your house and see past the broken branches and see the beautiful you know the plants as they should be as they can be she could see that she could see that transcendence through that and always see what was beyond it and I think the gift of the artist is to bring people like myself back to what is truly important in all that and Julie did that you know when she was rolling ravioli dough and when she was you know cutting taking cut flowers and arranging them and putting them on the bathroom counter always seeing beyond those things that can drag us all down and really really seeing what's important so I feel enriched by knowing her Julie was a very very very dear friend of mine not as long as all of you but every moment was very precious to me we had a lot in common our gardening our love for wine tea talking about our sons and our grandchildren she loved very very much and the first time I went to her house and saw the inside and all of that art I thought I was in another world so inspiring and realizing what a creative creative person she was she really fought these last couple of years and although she she didn't make it I really have to commend Joe for every moment that he went through to help her tirelessly all he did for her she appreciates every moment that you spent Joe please realize that and I feel like I'm part of the family I got to know Damien he kept me informed and she always told me about Josh and the grandkids and I just felt part of the family and I feel very honored and I'm gonna miss her a lot and even though she left us long before we wanted her to as they say she went on to get the party started for us Martha's not too thrilled about getting up and talking like this but I would comment that I've known Julie what about Joe and Julie roughly 30 years from the time we first met Martha their cousins by marriage or by blood I should say I'm cousin by marriage but one of the things that I can tell about Julie is that she would come down and visit she we had an open door policy with her word because she'd come down to visit her mother and her mother was at the motion picture home in Calabasas and we live out in Agura and not very far from there and one of the things that I was always amazed when she came down is I'm a type A personality so I got to have things quick I got them fast everything else she would come in she'd spend a week maybe 10 days and take care of her mother and go visit her every day and she'd leave early in the morning many times before I got up for work and I usually left pretty early and she'd come in 7-8 o'clock at night and she spent the whole day over there doing things with her mother we talked to her about it and Martha told me some of the things she did she'd you know whether it be combing her hair taking her to lunch doing her nails reading to her but you know it's this is special type of person who can do that and just come down and focus on that with her mother day after day and just enjoy it and she she wasn't like it was a burden to her she just did it that was her so that was another characteristic of her thanks I think it's time that the next generation have a little something to say I was one of the kids that grew up with the majority of you people that are out here and Joe and Julie who made this community something to fight for you know my mom was gone a lot you know and I remember as a child saying to her you know why are you going to one more meeting stay home stay home with me and today when I left a campaign kickoff and my seven-year-old boy tugged on my shirt and said dad why don't you stay home with me tonight and I realize how important it is to work that Joe you did and Julie and Nancy and Sheila and my mom you know you provided a community for us that was safe to grow up in and it's taken this race for me to realize the sacrifices that you made were for us and the sacrifices that I'm making today are for my kids and for your kids and it's so great to to be here and to thank Joe and Julie for the foundation that you've given me and my family and you know I look forward to reaching out Joe in the future here and I'm just you know feel grace to have be walking in the shoes of the group that's here you know I mean it's fascinating and it's life-changing and it's worth it to look in your seven-year-old boys eyes and say I'm doing the right thing you'll understand one day you know and thank you so I'm not the kind of person that stands up in front of groups and says stuff I always rely on my friend Nancy and my friend Julie over here but I have to say I have to say that Julie gorgeous beautiful incredible funny adorable Julie and that's it okay so I started the Redwood Mountain Fair which is like this tiny little organization that raised over $500,000 for all of the nonprofits in the valley and is going on now it's like rejuvenated and restructured and it's great it's wonderful but we had something that was really amazing in the beginning years it was called a juried art exhibit and it was in the main house of the Highlands Park in the mansion and Julie helped to put the whole thing together she helped to jury it to get it to be something that was like I mean we have artists in the valley that are phenomenal look around you I mean they're phenomenal artists they don't exhibit you know in a lot of other places and Julie helped to give them an incredible venue an opportunity to receive the recognition that they really deserved and prize money which of course artists don't need at all right and Julie put it together she juried it she did it it was like she was the main influence of the arts in this community for so many years before this was ever even created and besides being an amazing influence she was the heart of the arts in this community and I'll love her forever so we want to do something this year at the fair we're gonna find some way of giving Julie the recognition and the ability to continue that art on so anyway I'm sure Joe will give us some ideas yeah and Joe is the way that I actually met Julie so working for Joe hooray for Joe well I didn't get a chance to get to know Julie as well as I would like that's I'm sure that we all feel that way and Julie is one of those people that makes you feel like a like a God basically and I'm not sure it's so deserved but I know where it comes from and Julie is certainly given so much to so many of us that make us all feel more than we ever would be without her and we're lucky we still have that so thank Julie I'm surprised nobody else mentioned this but when Joe was running for supervisor the Reverend Glenn Cullen in Scotts Valley just thought it was awful that they were living in sin and Joe and Joe said he hoped people would tell funny stories about Julie well I remember on Halloween that year Julie wearing a little black cocktail dress which only Julie could wear because she was slim and she painted the hell of a scarlet a on her chest and I just thought that's courage so she had courage she had conviction and she had something special so and she had Joe really helpful when you're running for office somebody were a scarlet do we have anyone else that has a story to share Joyce how about you small statements are okay okay thank you well Julie and I I met her through this lady here and show the real estate and we were often politically not aligned Julie knew that it was a measure of your intellect to be able to disagree and not be disagreeable and so we did and I always felt we were friends as with Joe we could disagree and never be disagreeable and I think that's a gift that that she had how about just the mic I'll keep the mug for you okay so I've been standing here and I I haven't known I haven't known Julie nearly I'm gonna lose it I haven't known Julie nearly as long as most of you Julie and I are what were what I would call everyday friends we were in touch every day we talked about everything everything you could possibly think of I was going through my master's philosophy she was trying to take care of her mom who was getting ready to go into the old actors home I did theater for 20 years and I would hear stories about her mom her kids her grandkids I heard everything our favorite thing to do was I call her walking today she says I'm walking today we walk to Boulder Creek we get ice cream we get coffee we get cherry strudel at Genesis we would that's the kind of stuff we did I would go to her house and I would go because every time I walked through that door I saw a new piece I saw something I've never seen before and her art was everywhere I wasn't gonna talk to her art was in her cooking her art was in her cleaning oh my god floors I could eat off of right and I would always go to her house and go wow she would come to my house and everything was wild she walked into my yard and everything grew hugely lots of blackberry dishes and all kinds of stuff my house was never like hers but it was like amazing we go to her house and we would have you know roasted good peppers and curry and all these things and we would I would get there early and we would cook together because she would teach me stuff and of course she always knew everything because she insisted to me that she ought to tell me what to do because she was after all older a whole two years right anyway so she would put in my house and I turned her on to believe it or not old movies Humphrey Bo God Clark Gable Claudette Colbert Gary Cooper she didn't know any of them and I had notorious and I had I had everything I had Maltese Falcon we would do dinner in a movie night and we would have to starters and and we would have we would have cosmos or we would have margaritas and then she kept insisting that mythical Joe which is what I called Joe because he was back east and I kept insisting that he was mythical because I had read and I'd only heard his voice on the phone she said when he gets home you guys are gonna do a bartender competition because I swear yours are just as good as his but don't tell him I said that because Joe and I both like to bartend right so anyway her whole thing was I mean her art was everywhere which was great and and her grandkids right she's under her grandkids and she calls me she says okay my grandson Cypher's gonna come and spend a few days with me and you're the fun aunt right because all my nieces like to come to my house and play she says you got it what do you got what do you got that I can play with Cypher well I have all these like things like pick-up sticks and Tilly wings he's a little too old for board games I mean little too young for board games and stuff like that so she's like taking all these games and the one thing it was the final thing in this this I guess this is my funny part I had a room house meet at the time also named and so I'm over at Julie's and we're talking about games she can play with the kids do you remember how to play jazz of course I do I still have some okay well bring those over so me and Julie are sitting on her floor drinking wine playing Jackson the morning we get a call from Patty saying where are you and I said I'm over Julie's playing Jackson drinking wine come over and so the three of us are sitting on the floor drinking wine playing Jack's trying to get better at the game so that Julie can teach her grandkids that's my thing Julie was like that like bringing her grandkids over to my house because they fed animals there right Cypher food feeding all these blue jays and having them land right in front of him and getting so excited that you see the rapture in his face and watching Julie watch back was just she like everybody has said here she saw so much in everything and everything was art you know but but she but she embraced that she wasn't that was unfamiliar to her too I mean it was like she would look at me and say I don't know why we're such good friends we're really different and I would say I care and she says neither do I and then we have another cosmo or whatever that's it you know playing Jack's doing wine. It's a little story about a young man who's here my son my oldest son I have four sons that didn't leave us a lot of money to do a lot of things so we were always looking for something to do and it turned out that Julie and Joe and Joe's great ingenuity was always art behind the scenes he had cooked up this scheme for a bedroom in the basement but the bedroom in the basement meant that they had to move about five yards of gravel and rocks and cement out from underneath there and so this would be a way to occupy Gaben the whole summer so that he could afford to go on a trip so he spent the summer digging out their basement now this is stuff people don't know but you know what they knew how to use their resources and also I think it was a blessing it was really a blessing because it was very an ingenious way to help my son accomplish something in his life which has inspired him all his life and he speaks about it sometimes and he never really brings up the back breaking work but the joy that it got in his life and I think that's part of what was going on we we've heard a lot about the surface fun stuff but behind all that was a lot of work and a lot of practical experience that was given to all of us and she could always make my work seem more practical and I just I just had to add that because I know givens right now running the video but he's that that was her godson now I'm not so sure what that meant but it meant they had a special connection and I'll tell you what she was everybody's godmother mine too and Gord gave and just had back surgery well yeah I don't know what to say either I met Julie very late in life was at this wonderful Rebecca's and Hank's famous famous art gallery openings and it was my very first ceramic artist that I'd met and thereafter I met Linda Levy of course at the art center it was my very first person that I had met in ceramics and I was so overwhelmed by the statues and the amazing glorious I mean it was just Julie was just bigger than life anyway and then again the repartee and the wit and the funny and the Julie was was there every time and Rebecca and Hank had these art gallery openings every once a month it was fabulous and I love I just lusted to see Julie again and and to meet this young man who helped us also with our property we just moved here so I was really thank you Joe for what you did for us but over the time in the years that I've seen her and last year we had we begged her to come to Sarama Rama let us love you you know for God's sakes girl come here and she came it was it was really magical I will always remember that I'm so grateful for that and I want to say to Joe that what you did for Julie I know that she did so much but I also want to say you were there so much for her and I'm just so grateful for what you've done as well yeah yeah yeah yeah well on behalf of the art center Julie was such an inspiration to us in so many different ways I can't tell you the number of people that she touched in with her humor with her outlook on life with her very incredible sense of aesthetics the values that she carried with her all the time definitely touched us all and I I was laughing because you know we were talking about about remembering things and in helping put all this together I went through all the photographs that we've collected over the years for the a lot of shows that we've done and it was it was really an incredible trip to go back and look at all the different work I was looking for Julie's work and we had a lot of her work in the gallery over the years and and it was my pleasure to get to know Julie on a number of different levels but she was always there to help and inspire and to have fun with and that was really a bottom line was having fun we have an annual event that we do this is I think our 11th or 12th Sarama Ramma coming up and on the very first Sarama Ramma Julie and Dan heading got together and made the trophies and they were hysterical and I think Dan and and Julie must have had an incredible time together making these trophies and it really showed this year where dedicating our Sarama Ramma and Julie's memory and we were inspired by her sense of humor with the trophies that were made for this year so there's a bit of wit and humor in them all and I think that's what we carry and I remember you know we're getting to know Julie a little bit better she and Joe showed up at my open studio and we hit it we hit it off got into deeper conversation and they never left yeah yeah they asked to be invited to dinner and we had we had a great time and but also I work with Julie in so many different ways and one of the things that I remember really enjoying was we got together and designed posters for the different shows that we were doing here and it was always a creative inspirational activity to go through and and you know you talk about everything while you're working on these things and I just I carry that with me all the time I think it's she's a person that was always upbeat and positive about things and made you appreciate things on so many different levels and that's something to really be treasured I think so and I I thank you all for coming here tonight and I thank Joe for wanting to do this the art center is definitely we're very honored to be able to host this tonight so you said some wonderful things to me the other night I you've got real things to say about Julie you know her I don't quite know what to say but I we I'll just reiterate what Linda just said that we did make those great trophies for the for the very first Sarama Raman I just remember that I had thrown all these different parts and pieces and she just and Julie came over and said well let's put this together and let's put this on here and I'm I'm going oh well that's not what I thought but yeah that's fine that's good let's do that you know so we just kept adding on all these parts and pieces and and then she said you know Dan you should you should do this more I don't know if you really like the work that you're doing right now you know you know you should do this more you know so she she was definitely an inspiration she just kind of kept pushing us to just try something new out you know so that was it was really fun she turned me on to a whole new palette look at I mean all these colors that I had never used before uh and since then we've I've been using them in my studio you know it's just uh yeah I'll we'll all miss her who's got something else saying about you there you had some moments with Julie well you know I've been thinking about this a lot and um I think for me and listen everybody that Julie I mean I just can't believe I'm still standing she's not you know it's like she was she's was always like another dimension to me she'd come in and you know and there'd be she'd say something like out of left field to me you know like and I'd see everything oh yeah you know she she had that way of like looking at things and they were just different than other people you know I mean it's not like it was like it's just kind of keeping you straight you know just kind of saying that's a way of looking at something I don't have to look at you know I don't need to see the world that way I'm seeing it now I can appreciate it the way that she just saw and that's kind of what I can't believe is gone that dimension it's just like another dimension Mary was Julie's book source I didn't do it to you Mary no I came in as a friend of a friend and I was welcomed she allowed me to be her book friend she allowed me to be her friend she loved you Joe you let us have a date you shared her with me and she she always wanted to win this fight I lost my mom to the same kind of fight but my mom chose not to go there but Julie said I'm fighting I'm going there and I don't think she's left us so I just love all the things that I've been hearing from all of you I have to say ditto on everything I haven't I didn't get to know Julie as well as I wanted to but every time I was around her and in her presence she was always very inspiring uplifting and like so many of you said found the good and the direction and everything and it was a reminder of being present here now this matter past future it's all just right now and I just really love the way she encourages and has hope for everybody that she came across and it's very inspirational to me and I see that it's done the same for all of you and it's awesome my name is Peter I'm a neighbor of Joe and Julie's in Brookdale and some of my recollections has been in the garden I've been working in the garden and in the afternoons and then I'll hear a little rustle over the side of the fence and I'll look over and I'll see Julie also tending to her garden as well so those images you know are strong with me also I see how Julie could like it's like this she appreciates the the beauty of life and I remember her bringing I guess her grandchildren over to the fence we've got a chicken coop and just asking her grandchildren to watch the chickens and she was as much into watching the the movement of the chickens as her grandchildren and it was just the inner child in her I think that it was there just observing and I know that over the years if if she had a request for anything that she wouldn't hesitate to ask she was always so much of a guardian in the neighborhood of making sure that you know she knew that she was that I knew that she was aware of you know who was coming in and out and that you know we should be on alert and just being aware so important so just wanted to say hey to Julie and thank you you're not jumping up I'm just helping out raise your hand well don't stay right here okay this is a little story about Julie and the two of you once once upon a time I had Joe and Julie and you over for a brunch on my at my house and you guys were about the ages of what you're real hit as he is yes three and five you were starting to climb a very very tender little sapling tree in the backyard I'm sitting here Julie's here you're running around I'm not you are there too but you aren't climbing the tree I'm freaked out because you're climbing this tree and it's going like this and you're climbing and I'm going no Julie turns around and just says to you Josh just take a look at the tree study it and be mindful and and that's all she said I'm sitting there thinking you're gonna like slingshot into the space or something so it was a tender story that I retold to her not too long ago so it was it was a fun story I'm passing it back did we miss anyone Joe hi there's a few people how about Alicia appreciate about Julie was that she actually took the time to see me she actually looked she actually took the time to see me and I heard that from so many people that she looks deeply that she appreciates the heart of the person there and I love her for doing that for me sometimes you really need to be seen and she caught me at a good time and I'm grateful does anyone else well my mother was saying uh you know I worked hard there at at your house and we like a dog yeah I remember I think I actually grew a tail maybe and and but it was it was extremely satisfying not not just like the hard work aspect which which I have always appreciated but anytime we weren't digging in that earth and pulling rocks out of the soil there was Joe and Julie and of course Josh and Damien and and being around the family that close because that I'd known I'd known the family for a long time we'd had many visits but that was a kind of a time when I got to be saturated in in you know in the in the experience there and it's truly the art the art that came from Julie I can see it how it inspired me in my life and then in fact the work that she gave that you guys gave us sent me off to Europe where I spent six eight months and it changed my life forever and I still feel like that inspiration combined with the art that I that I experienced there still it's still it's still part of me and it'll always be a part of me and I'll always appreciate that um then I think we had some really good paintball wars well no nobody did yeah yeah I will um I will always miss her and um but I'll always have her as well and I can be blessed for that very much so yeah I forgot to say something I wanted to mention when I was standing up which was um people were speaking to Julie's ability to notice and study and you know give you advice to study and um we had a client that had children that wanted pets so bad and every day I'd be working there and then the people the kids would come up these little children like can we get a kitty or can we get a dog and parents were like no we can't you know this everything's white kind of house and no we can't have an animal and I felt so bad for these kids that they couldn't have any animals that I finally thought well maybe we can you know have ceramic animals or something that they could connect with these animals because they wanted animals so bad so I thought of this idea of doing a cat garden with the cats in places that the kids could get to the cats and I proposed this idea to Julie who embraced it thoroughly and we had a meeting to set up to talk about the study of what kind of cats and you know what they would be like and and I just remember being completely blown away because that long table that she worked on she had like a dozen books on cats in every shape and size and she started talking about it in detail about the way they would curl their paw and and their rump would do just this and the tail would go up there and their hip would come out and I mean things I kind of noticed about cats but I mean she noticed everything about cats and about every kind of cat and I was just amazed I was astounded that she had put all this study and time and effort and got into the core and essence of cats to do this project and when I came in I noticed this is one of the cats and kind of an angel cat but it really affected the kids lives and I actually got one of the cats which we had a party that ended up early before I got home and I was calling my husband get that cat out before the kids threw a football but they threw a football and broke the cat but anyway I loved it for many years so I just wanted to say how much she really entered her art and her work and how much it came through for people to enjoy yeah you did good the only reason I'm asking is because when I start speaking oh no then we might all have to start going home which is really sad so this is this is kind of your last chance does anyone want to get in on this she she did she did twice actually I think I think twice it'll be on tv I actually think we've been doing a really good job there has been so much more laughter and applause than crying that Julie would feel at least here she she this is what she would want personally this is what I would want you know I can't speak for the rest of you but tears and oh she was a great woman again that's not Julie we've been telling good stories and that's nice we did do one thing wrong this probably should have been filled with champagne the entire time and then you wouldn't have a problem getting people to actually take the cup you know we just the problem would have been keeping it filled but um I I've spent the past week and a half or so with images of Julie and this theme has come up over and over again but she was an incredibly beautiful woman and as a son that's not something that clicks with you usually it's just years later you're like oh wow this is incredible and a lot of people that's enough for them their their life I'm a beautiful person and I'm a success Julie didn't stop there she didn't stop with just being a beautiful woman a beautiful person she went on and she made beautiful things and she made the world around her more beautiful and that wasn't enough for Julie either she went on and she made your life more beautiful your life more beautiful and I'm not going to point to all of you but she has made each of our lives more beautiful in different ways and this is beginning to sound a lot like a eulogy and if Julie was sitting over there she would roll her eyes say something snarky that was like nice on the surface but then you think about it a little bit and you're like ouch Julie did you really just say that to me so I'm not going to go any further with that train of thought I really like the stories and the memories because I spent the past couple weeks just trying to think of memories and stories and once again it's it's something that escapes you but you're that person's child it's just I don't want to say background noise but it's different when you're removed but I've been thinking long and hard about it one of the things that has really come to me is parenting and that's something you don't truly appreciate until you become a parent yourself you know when you're just a child it's like yeah that's their job they do it okay then you have your own children you're like whoa how did that happen that's incredible what she put up with and Julie wasn't a single parent but she was the primary I mean my dad was far away and joe was always there but joe was extremely respectful about the fact that these were Julie's children it was always 100 behind her but he knew this was she was mom and he was there for her but you know she she did it and the things that I think made me who I am well she she taught us how to cook and I don't know how she taught us how to cook because it wasn't it was just by including us in the cooking I remember making granola we made our own bloody granola with this big thing that we would turn and then we would bake it and you know that was it got to the point where I was I read Little House in the Prairie and there's recipes in there and I was like I'm gonna go cook this is a hard tack right I just started making things and I don't know how I went from being a little kid to helping Julie to just cooking things out of books but I did Kiki I'm really glad you're here because somehow every night we ate dinner together pretty much every night and somehow Joshua and I would clear the table wash the dishes drain the dishes sweep the entire bloody kitchen floor and I I don't remember you guys like if you don't do this it's a timeout or you're gonna lose your video game privileges I don't know how you guys got us to do it but we did it every single night so Kiki take note it's coming oh I scared him away um I I've heard a bunch of mentions of Redwood community school and University of Trees and I don't know how Julie and probably Joe decided on that but I'm grateful I think it really helped broaden my brain in ways that I will never really understand but they thought outside the box when I was really small and I'm you know I did yoga instead of PE we we we meditated and learned to tune our chakras which you know I needed that skill but if I do I'm ready they I don't know how you guys did this they would take us to shows and nightlife and live music on school nights all over the valley that was it kumba jazz center I mean most of the time I was in the corner reading a book because it's like yeah whatever this is interesting guys but can we go home but like I still I don't know how old I was I remember this guy that could circular breathe while he played the saxophone and that caught me I'm just like well this guy doesn't stop he it keeps going and going and going and this is actually kind of interesting and they drug us out to the raku festival the entire weekend and I would like see julian friday when we got there I don't see you guys again until sunday afternoon other people would feed us we do stop it was just this place with large pits of fire and lots of people on drugs and it was fun that really comes down to and I think you know you kind of brought it up that the space and the freedom did julie and joe gave us to just mature and develop and grow and I'm pretty sure they were watching more closely than I believe they were you know but you know we had a horn you know on on saturday morning josh and I would go out into the sanikers mountains and we wouldn't come back and tell us well until we heard the horn which usually was blown you know around when it's starting to get dark but we could be miles away and I I I don't know I'm not brave enough to parent the way they do I'm trying I'm trying to give my kids some space but I think it also made me who I am and it is important to give people the space to grow and it's a hard thing to do I remember long car rides in a little 1970 BMW women everywhere in that car I remember halloween costumes julie would make our halloween costumes for us and then when we got older we would make our own but the only reason I could make my own costume is because julie had helped us make them we never thought about buying a halloween costume um clay has been mentioned a lot and I played with some clay with julie but you know it was intimidating I didn't go there with her I did my own things that was her space and um I couldn't quite do it and I think just summing up julie's parenting is this quiet encouragement she just had a way of pushing you along without actively pushing you along you almost didn't know but she had a sense in a way of helping you along so you know this is this is the point where you kind of say what what is a life successfully lived and for me it's it's things like leaving the world that you lived in a better and more beautiful place walking softly on the earth not taking more than you need and if you're somebody who has children teaching them to think for themselves to make their own decisions and hopefully do the same but not enforcing that on them I miss you julie I love you and you'll be with me my children and my family and the community around me for ever because we will pass her on in little ways I remember julie we go it was like the early 70s it's like 1970 wasn't it like May I was born yeah that's when we first met it's not as old as as long as a lot of people have known her but it was it was a memorable time it's it's stuck with me um she's screaming when she met you yeah and I screamed too I cried I cried a lot um julie is you know an insane artist and a lot of her recognition is as a ceramicist fine artist and I tried this evening with with a few of her ceramic faces to paint on my face some of her stuff with with carolins helps and you know I've never tried that before you know we took art classes we took charcoal drawing classes cartooning classes painting classes ceramic classes you know they certainly influenced us you know and that on that regard I think it didn't stick in the same way as it does you know with some folks but I was tonight trying to draw on my face which I can't see but you can you know some of julie's art and it's amazing it's like so this simple geometric stuff that she does and I and I was just realizing oh you just do like this and I was like but it's you know she has this this style you know and her style changed you know we have this art you know we've seen we're kind of coming together with all this different art of julie's over many years and her style changed over those 30 40 years and it's really beautiful and you know I I love that about her but in all reality that's not how I spent most of my time with julie most of my time with julie was spent in the kitchen most of it those are my memories is you know baking bread julie would would take a tomato these big tomato juice cans these really big ones and make bread in them and the bread would rise up and mushroom out the top and we'd take to school round bread you know round bread that was our sandwiches we would just spend you know we would be able to make our own cakes and put food coloring in them and they could be green or they could be whatever I mean that's where we spent our time was hanging out in the kitchen joe's Italian food culture and julie's blended together beautifully I think more of our food culture is Italian but at the same time julie was an amazing amazing creative cook we started out vegetarian and then we incorporated meat along the way and now with my son somewhere over there the little guy you see around that's where we spend our time you know we were making the cakes that you'll hopefully eat in a little bit and he's breaking eggs and he's just like that's where he's comfortable and my wife and I were really hard and we're away all the time but we're in the kitchen you know when we're home we're in the kitchen and that's really really important and that's julie you know and joe brought that to us which was making pasta from scratch it was you know that that was our time it wasn't actually in the studio making ceramics all the time it was cooking and all reality that's where you spend a lot of your time um after the kitchen it was in the garden julie is for those who don't know is an amazing gardener in a horticulturalist and you know when in in the the mid 70s at highlands park we had a you know there was community gardens there and we had a community garden plot that was you know as big as this building's footprint and we grew all of our vegetables there and it was just what we did as kids we just grew vegetables and then back in brookdale we grew vegetables and then julie moved more on to landscaping and horticulture and using natives and ornamentals in a very huge yard and that's you know that was our labor was pushing the wheelbarrow is cutting english ivy endlessly cutting english ivy you know it was you know it was living under the red woods in brookdale and that had a huge impact on me and you know i went on to different careers i did graphic design for a while but now you know what i do is plant ecology i went on i did a master's in ecology and i'm a restoration ecologist and that's because julie taught me this love of plants and figuring out how they fit and and and the design and the art and the beauty of plants and figuring out how to arrange and bring them together and that is the the career that i've chosen after several others but it's julie's sense of who she is and her sense of art that has has is not just in the clay and and and the last thing is is julie's whimsy julie has an amazing silliness that i think i don't know i know very well i'm sure you know i don't know if everybody knows but she's she's kind of she's a she's a joker she's a jokester and i'm remembering like our our father passed away in june a month before our mother which is shitty but we had a memorial a month or so ago for our father and it reminded me all these things that you kind of like go that person is gone and now i have these questions you know when did i first walk you know these silly little stuff what were the first words i uttered and so after our father passed away and julie and joe were spending a lot of time in hospitals and i went you know julie's bedside and i'm like you know what is the first words i said you know and julie's just like go away you know what i mean it's just like she's not thinking about this stuff day to day i mean julie is is julie she's there and she's present and you know within you know a blink of an eye we were talking about my wife and i maybe buying land in michigan and whether that was a good idea and how we could finance the land and you know just you know i call it free advice it was just talking about life and about you know the fog out the window and how damn foggy it is in san francisco you know it's she's here and now and and i'm very much that way i'm just here i am i'm here right now i don't know where i'll be tomorrow and and julie is julie hasn't left me at all i i i'm sure i've not done the the appropriate level of grieving but you know julie is present and like many times when i've traveled and been far away from her she's with me and i and i think about her and i talk to her and when i danced with her tonight you know she's there with me and so thank you all for for being here with julie and and keeping her alive and thank you for supporting joe so in my family for your birthday we have one particular cake and this cake once again actually comes from joe's side of the family it it was it's a italian peasant cake and uh joe's great-grandmother baked it and then his grandmother and his mother taught it to julie who perfected it it became her favorite cake what what village was that joe lucabarga lucabarga it's where it comes from and it's it was our birthday cake so i think it's only appropriate on julie's birthday to make a colombo cake for her and saying happy birthday for her because today is her birthday yep 69 years young come on in rio okay happy birthday to you happy birthday to you happy birthday happy birthday to you and you know we didn't discuss this but i who is more appropriate to blow out the candles then do you guys want to blow them out ready one two and everyone else can blow it too i'm sorry you've heard a lot about them but i have not introduced rio tallis kiran taylor kiki and cypher taylor these are the grandchildren


One of the profound changes I've had to make in my marketing over the years is to stop listening to the mainstream marketing teachers that are essentially training us to market to other people's reptilian brain it's the part of the human brain that evolved from our common ancestry with lizards and it is governed by Impatience by fear by greed Essentially, it's the baser parts of humanity Right. I mean because if you think about the best parts of us, it's not it's not the fear. It's not the greed It's not the impatience, but that's how marketers many of them get to us They use the messages that make us feel like if we don't buy this if we don't join this We're going to be sorry. We're going to not have as good of a life. We should be afraid of this deal going away Now there is of course, there are authentic deadlines and I've written about that. I've talked about that you can Google Authentic deadlines George cow and you'll find my blog post about that but what I'm talking about is the overuse or the fake use of deadlines as well as Things that make us feel like oh if I if I simply buy this product My problems are all solved so deception fear greed but so let me actually show you a real example that I Screen captured a couple years ago now because I haven't been following these kinds of marketing for a long time But I want to show this to you because you'll get the sense of what I'm talking about here So let me share my screen and what you're going to see on the screen is an actual Yeah, it's a it's a screenshot that I took and then I wrote some things to point you to the different parts of The screenshot so give me a moment and I apologize There's a lot gonna you're gonna see a lot on the screen, but I'll walk you through it step by step. Here we go Okay, as you can see here, there's a lot going on in this image. This was the actual screenshot right here in the middle, right and And This screenshot was hiding a mind map that They were trying to get us to put their put our email address in so that we could have here we go. Sorry. Okay, so yes, this this Pop-up was hiding a mind map and we had to put our email address in in order to see the mind map Okay, so let's talk through what examples are of what lizard brain is first of all wait, right? It says wait here, of course feeding our impatience. Don't leave empty-handed empty-handed suggests Oh my gosh, I'm going to be missing out. I should be afraid and I should be greedy too, right? Take this with you, right? You can't take this with you because you have to give your email address in order to access it So there's nothing that they're actually giving us steal Okay, why steal have you have you heard the other marker to say steal this steal that Why are we stealing? Stealing is playing on our baser instinct about gaining an unfair advantage over other people Why are we trying to gain an unfair advantage over people because of fear because we're afraid that if we don't get an unfair advantage We will lose in life and we will be sad and we will be you know other people will be winning We don't have to steal anything We can We can learn we can educate ourselves. We can improve ourselves We don't have to ever steal anything right our number one secret. It's not really true I mean, it's not really the number one secret if it's a number one secret. Why are they not selling it? Obviously, it's a lie and secret of course suggests that You know, it is something that if we don't get in on you know, we will always be outside and not in the tribe It's something that only the insiders have right That doubles your webinar results instantly Of course, it's never instant because you still have to do a ton of work and it never works for everybody Right. So this is lie after lie after lie Even if you're already crushing it with webinars now, why why do people say crushing it? Why do we have to crush anybody or crush anything?  It's a it's this idea of this. It's a it's a violent mental idea Of of power over others rather than collaboration with others. See all these things we just a lot of us are Unconscious about these things, but we know something is off. We know something is wrong We're just unconscious about it. And if we use these kinds of things Our conscience will constantly be bothering us. That's something's not right We can't fully be empowered in our marketing until we feel aligned Right with the kinds of words and kind of ideas that we're actually promoting out there guaranteed What's guaranteed you first of all, this is free. So you can't what are you going to guarantee me and plus I have to do the work Right Just by doing the work. It's not guaranteed results. Nobody can guarantee you results by the way if if if No one's has told you nobody can guarantee you results Not even not even if you follow their stuff step by step Because everybody's different every situation's different Right, even if you follow everything correctly step by step nobody not a single teacher Or expert can guarantee you any results. That's why I never say that I never use the word guarantee Unless it's about satisfaction guarantee if I'm giving money back So sure if you're not satisfied happy to give you money back, but I can never guarantee any results, right?  It's not my mind map You're giving it to thousands of people. Why is it mine? It's not mine Right, it's everybody's right that you're giving it way too. So this is this is a A very extreme example But you're going to see this kind of thing all over the place So I want you to start paying attention As you go and look at your emails today As you surf on facebook or wherever youtube or or surf the web Look at what kind of lizard brain features the marketers are trying to stoke from within you Because here's the thing If we give in to that kind of marketing if we start doing that kind of marketing Thinking well god if I use fear and patience and greed, of course, I'm going to get more sales In the short term Of course because human beings are easily manipulated We we are scared. We're easily scared. We're easily wanting to be in the tribe You know, it's easy to get sales if you use lizard brain neuro marketing neuro marketing. That's a thing It's a thing neuro marketing is to Manipulate the human brain to get us money. Okay It's easy. It's easy to make money that way in the short term But what happens in the long term your conscience will keep bothering you. This is there's something not right about this I can't do this much longer, which is what happened to me I was doing in the beginning and I I just couldn't as a as a somebody like me. I bet you are like me We both want to live a life that's purposeful That's aligned with deeper values that we can have we can live a life that we can be proud of If that's true, you can't doing this stuff, you know, it's going to eat away at you Number one number two it creates a world of more lizard brain people It it makes your audience More attuned to fear and impatience and greed Okay, and scarcity and when you when you train your audience like that You end up with clients that Are not the best fit for you And so once I stopped doing the lizard brain stuff and started saying no, I'm going to commit to doing marketing from a higher place I'm going to appeal to people's higher virtues rather than to their base or instincts And if I appeal to people's inspiration if I appeal to their sense of Wanting to take care of themselves or take care of other people Guess what? I I attract the best clients now And all of you, you know, and I track the best supporters and the best fans Really, I mean, have you noticed like my people are amazing every everybody who comes into my courses and my programs Say my god, you or you attract the best people. Why? Because I market to the best parts of human nature That's why I attract the best people and I want you to attract the best people too So anyway, I hope this is inspiration for you That we can this this beautiful idea that we can align How we do marketing with our higher cells or with our deeper values however you want to call it And at the same time attract our favorite people to us It's just it's what I found to be true over years of experimentation And you all can see how each other is amazing That's it. So I hope this is inspiring and as always I'm I I'm so happy to see your comments and your questions And I'm going to give you a moment while to add your comments while I see if there's any from the live commenters that I want to address here Okay, so I just want to thank you so much for joining me Judith Subhan Laurie Lauren Rian captain Lisa Kim Thank you all for your support for your comments and to go forward today Become more conscious of how your lizard brain is being triggered by marketing And decide not to support those companies and those businesses because they're today. There's so many alternatives right and then from yourself know that you can market to people's Spirits to people's higher values And build a real community of kindred spirits All right I wish you well. I'm george cow. I love talking about authentic business and authentic marketing if you enjoyed this video I think you'll benefit from others that I make as well. So I'll see you In the next video. All right. Take care