Is it recording? Is it going? Do I look decent? Yeah.  Welcome back to my channel. My name is Lydia. I'm in mental health videos here on YouTube pretty much every day and I'm outside filming and it's weird. I'm also probably going to fall over because I'm walking backwards in crappy dolly shoes from Primark. Life is fun. Don't let me drown. Oh, it's recording. Yay. Tilt it out there. I'm short.  And I'm someone with BPD. You guys know that. You're going to walk into a tree.  This is what life is like with BPD. I have a shiny bag. So you guys know I've had issues with migraines. So I'm going to get what basically fire as much pain relief as I can. Because my head hurts and I don't like it. The logic isn't it that. Also I'm dying my hair when I hit 4,000 subscribers and I can't wait. Because I haven't died in a while and it's this sleep. Let's go get drugs. So we're getting food. I am living my life because I'm a normal human being. Just like most other people with BPD. We function in society.  Do I manipulate you? No.  No. Do I take the mick out of your age a lot? No. A little bit but not a lot. A little bit. All right grandad. I also had a happy meal because I'm mature.  If I talk about money I'm manipulating people according to Twitter. So Patreon link in the description. Cool perks, cool giveaways. We're going to be filming the list of people on Patreon later which is fun. I'm filming in public too. This is really weird for me. Like they are actually wanting to talk to the camera. It's really weird because like anxiety is a thing but I'm also so drugged out my head that I don't care. I should stop talking. Self-pity ends too. This is a big thing that irritates me. I never know how to act around people so I just try and go along with it and play a role I guess. Maybe I should be a drama student.  Can put on different personalities with who I'm with. It doesn't mean that I'm like faking who I am but like I tend to change depending on who I'm with. Like I think most of the like I act a certain way around certain people. How is it you and me?  Like when I'm out and about I tend to be normally like pretty self-conscious and um anxiety. What fun. How do you want to put it? Like you know what I mean? Yeah. The siren girl because it hit me when I was filming.  What am I doing? Watching YouTube. What happened yet? Hopefully. Is that all I'm gonna die of my hair? No, I haven't got past 50 views yet. Turn left. Turn left. Turn left. Turn left. Turn left.  You're trying to kiss the camera by the looks of that. No, I'm filming everything.


Okay, this is part two of video editing on Linux with Cade and Live. Now, I figure why not edit video one as video two's demonstration. So here we are. I have Canelite open. I also have my file browser open. I wanted to show you because last time we clicked here to import videos, but you can also just drag and drop the files. So here's my intro video, my intro clip, and it's going to ask me, do I want to switch? And I'm going to say no, I'm going to stick with my defaults for this because my intro video is 24 frames a second, and my final video is going to be 29 frames per second. And then I'm also going to drag and drop, oops, I just, let's see, originals. And here is, this is the video right now that we're recording. It's funny, it's made a thumbnail already, so this is actually being recorded right now. If I click on it, you can see the file size getting bigger, I'm sure. Let's go ahead and grab video number one. So this is, if you watch video one, this is before I've actually finished editing it. Is that a little weird? So I have those two videos there. I'm going to, again, expand my timeline here because I like it a little bit bigger there. And I'm going to drag my intro here, my video here. And you know what, I was using a new setup for my recording and the volume looks kind of low, which means this video is probably going to be kind of low too. I need to boost the audio on my mic because you're going to see how loud the music is here and how low this is. And people like to complain about audio if you're not perfect with it. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to trim a little bit here because you can see where I start talking. And if I go to the end here, you can say this is me saying, and I always have a great day, so I'll put this here. Now we're going to start working with transitions and fades and stuff like that. So right now I can press play. The audio isn't that bad, but it is a difference. The intro video is a little bit louder. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to select the intro video here and then up in my effects panel, and that might, you might have to click on a tab here because I've pulled this out into a separate little display here. And up here you can search through your effects and I'm going to type in volume and there's a few different volume options. We're going to pick volume key frameable. Now there's a few things you can do here. I can drag and drop it here or if I have this selected already I can just double click it and right away you can see our volume controls here. And it's for this clip right here. So this is key frameable. So I can create different key frames and make the volume go up and down. But I'm just going to go to the first frame and I'm going to, there's already a key frame put at the first frame and I'm going to lower this eight decibels. And if I want, I could probably boost, I usually try avoiding boosting the audio at all because then it can start hearing some humming and stag. But I'll bump it up two decibels. Great. Now, you notice that's a hard cut from this clip to this clip. I want it to fade. Well, as long as the clips are, oops, I should also say, you can grab your key frames here. And so if I was to add another key frame here, I can go like this and I can add another key frame here and another key frame here. And if I back out a little bit, you can see those blue dots. You can actually manually adjust your key frames here, how loud they are and where they are. And I'm just going to press control Z to undo those key frames and click here and control scroll to zoom back in. And when your clips are overlapping like this, all you have to do is click in the corner of the top video here and we've added a dissolve. So now, if you watch our preview there, you can see it fading as I drag. And I'm just dragging with my mouse here. So now I do want to mention buffering. So now if I click halfway through this dissolve and press spacebar to play, it's going to play a little jerky, and depending on the speed of your computer, it may be jerkier than other things. And the more layers you have, if you have a lot of effects going on, things can play rather jerky. So watch. It actually played pretty smooth.  But if you ever have an issue where you go to preview like a dissolve like this and you put it right there and press that and it plays jerky, you need to give it a chance to buffer. And best way to do that is just go back a little bit instead of clicking right here, click here, and that will give the single track time to play and buffer that effect. So if you're having transitions run jerky, that's one thing you can do. It also depends on the speed of your computer. And that's just a preview. If it plays jerky in the preview, doesn't mean it's going to play jerky when you render it out. It should be smooth. So we have that. Now I'm going to click over here and scroll in. And I'm going to add a dissolve over here. So now it's going to dissolve back. But the audio for this one's still out. So I'm going to click that, double click here. I'm going to click here to go back to the first frame of that clip where we have a key frame or a set. And I'm going to, again, I'm going to adjust this one down eight decibels. I don't have to do anything with this because it's already up eight decibels from its original key frame. Oh, no, I hit Control Z, so it undid that. Our two decibels. We'll move that up just a teeny, tiny bit. So yes, that's always. I actually cut myself off there saying, and have a great day. It's probably just stopped recording a little too soon. Let's go ahead and drag this over a little bit though. Yeah, I must have canceled the recording before I finished saying that. Nothing I can do about that except for maybe record it right now and put it in, but I can't do that because I'm recording this video so my microphone is being used. Anyway, so that's that. Now, let's say there are a lot of effects here. So I can clear out my search here and you can go through. There's audio effects and video effects up in here. Contrast, equalizing, grayscale, hue shift, all these things. So, for example, we'll just use some here. I'm going to select my intro or extra video right here. So I'm going to select that. I'm going to double click grayscale. And now it's grayscale. And some effects have options, some don't. This one's just grayscale. Another thing you can do is if I come up here, I can, oh, I was going to type in saturation, but I could already see that. Double click that and I have saturation. I can turn the saturation up so the color is more saturated. But if you're doing the saturation all the way down, that's basically the same as grayscale, although you might get a slightly different. So let's look at how this looks and then also let's look at grayscale. So I have multiple effects for this clip. I've got the volume, which is for the audio. And then I have two for the video. Well, if you want to turn off effects, which sometimes is good when you're previewing. If you have a lot of effects, it could affect your processing. You can mute them or hide them, disable this effect. So this is what grayscale looks like. And this is what desaturating it looks like. So there is a little bit of a difference. So think about that when you're, so this is grayscale. This is desaturated. Desaturating it seems to be a little bit darker, a little bit crisper, actually like it better than the grayscale.  If you want to move an effect up and down, you can use these little arrows. And it does make a difference on what order things are in. So for example, if I was to add in a contrast effect and a brightness effect. And you have also sometimes things are key frammable. So if you want it to start off, brightness is just going to be set the brightness. Key frammable means that you can have the brightness change throughout the clip, you know, so you can have it go up or down. You can make it start off really bright and then get darker. Anyway, I'm just going to brightness for this. So here I can turn up the brightness and I can turn up the contrast. So obviously that looks horrible. But let's just see what happens if I move brightness before contrast. Makes a big difference. Doesn't our picture completely disappeared? I can turn brightness down. And it's because the brightness, it's making it brighter and then adjusting the contrast. Or I can adjust the contrast and make it brighter. If the contrast is adjusted first, you're going to have a little more stability on that. That's not really the right words for it. But so, and even moving our saturation down to a different level will affect that because the brightness and contrast is looking at the colors rather than a gray scale. So that's something to think about in all video editing. You know, the order you add effects will make a difference. So that's how you move those with those little arrows and the little garbage can will remove those. Now, effects that I use most commonly, I'm just going to type fade here. You have fade from black and fade to black and then you have fade in and fade out. So fade in and fade out are audio. So let me just for fun here, I'm going to add a clip. I'm going to add in a song here. So here's an audio clip. So I can choose this and I can go fade in, fade out. And by default, it adds about a two second fade. And you can see them, the little red lines here. Now, I can adjust the length, how long it fades in and fades out. I can come here and I can choose to choose that clip and I can move this here so I can make this longer or shorter. But another option is if I was to instead of searching up here, I can come up here to the corner of this video and I can drag this out. So now it automatically added a fade in effect. So and if I was to go to the end of that clip, I can point here and drag this and that's going to fade out. So you add the fade out. So you can add those clips, those effects by clicking up there, dragging and dropping them to the clip or dragging the corner over. Now if I go back over here to a video clip and I grab the corner and I drag it in. Now video clips, it defaults dragging the corners like that to fade to and from black. Which is if you wanted to fade out, there you go, let me mute this audio track. So yeah, so if you wanted to fade in or out to black, that's what the fade in and fade out or for as opposed to dissolving to another layer. And you can again adjust the length of those like so as well. Just remember that if you're pulling the corner, audio is going to default for an audio fade. If it's video, it's going to be fading in or out to black. Now if I was to remove those fade in and fade out, I'm sorry, fade to black and from black from the video, I can have fade in and fade out audio effects, which I can also do such like this and I can also have it fade to and from black. So here the audio is fading in and out and it's also fading in and out from black as well as dissolving to another layer because we have this dissolve effect there. So those are things to think about. And I like starting a lot of my videos with fades in and fading in audio and fading out audio and fading from black and to black, at least when I'm working with actual video clips, which we're going to get more into in the next video, you know, actually editing video clips, not just this little clip from the last tutorial. So I think this tutorial has been long enough. Well, I guess, well, yeah, let's get into rendering. Let's just get right into it. So I have this, this all edited out, it's very simple edit. I have my intro, it fades to my tutorial and then fades to the outro there. Now I'm going to click render. Well, it's also always a good idea to save your project. So I'm just called this Kaden live one. So that saved the project. So now I can leave them come back and reopen this later on to edit it. So now I'm going to click render. And depending on what version, because it seems like every time they do in a release, they change the setup of the screen, but you should have some presets on how you want to render out the video. And of course, you can also customize them. Don't hate me. I'm just going to choose MP4 here. You can have this bar for quality. You can also choose more options where you can adjust things manually.  So if you want to do a shell rendering of this, you can. But for right now, you know, I'm going to get more into these rendering options in the next video. For right now, I'm just going to choose MP4. I'm going to give this a name. So I'm going to go here and I haven't created my shortcuts yet. I'm going to go media, data, videos, tutorials, and I'm going to call this one Kaden Live Linux video editing number one. And then I'll click render. And it will start rendering out that video. And you can continue working on this project or another project and it won't affect this. You will continue to render this out. And this clip, it says it's going to take about 14 minutes. I'm thinking it's probably going to be a little bit shorter than that. Well, actually, you know, that video's about 14 minutes, so that makes sense. Okay. This is part of a series. Be sure to check out all the videos in the series. This is part number two. But there will be more. Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss any of those. If you like my videos and want to support me, you can go to patreon.com forward slash milix 1000 and there you can become a supporter. Also check out my website filmsbychrist.com. That's Chris the K. There should be a link in the description to both of those. And as always, I hope that you have a great day.


exist but they're watching you yes that's right that's what we're going to be talking about in this video before I begin hit that thumbs up button down below hit subscribe click all notifications then you will be notified when I upload a video in the future for one of ones you can go to my website it is narcsurvivor.co.uk and if you'd like to make a donation to our community leave a super chat the live chat a super thanks in the comment section or go to my paypal it is paypal.me slash narcsurvivor anyway onto today's message they're acting like you don't exist but they're watching you yes believe it or not while they may have treated you with contempt as though you're worthless or beneath their consideration they are watching your every move they're monitoring you they want to see what you're doing they want to see what is going on in your life and really you've got to look at it like this when they were around you they downplayed your worth they minimized what you were doing they acted like it wasn't anything special but they were in denial and they were lying to you because now that you're gone or now that they left you they can't get enough of you they are constantly watching you because here's the thing with toxic and narcissistic people they already know that if someone is around them if someone doesn't desire to be involved with them or if it's something where you disapproved or something they did and then they had to leave immediately your value goes up in their rise so they're watching you because they have idealized you they viewed you as perfect as being greater than them and that's why they're willing to invest their time energy and effort into you because if they really deemed themselves and their lives to be more valuable they would be investing their time energy and effort into that and yet instead they're investing it into watching you because yes it's all a game a lie they viewed you as more valuable so that's why their rise are always on you and just to really get in deeper into this and confirm it you disapproved of some things that they did maybe you didn't approve of them cheating lying or stealing maybe they would drink alcohol or doing drugs they were getting involved in stuff that you did not approve of and that's why they could no longer be around you so now they have to settle for for watching you from afar and yet the people that they surround themselves with yes they may be fully aware of what they're doing the difference is that they don't care they're okay with it they don't mind that the narcissist cheats lies or steals they enable them they allow their behavior to continue but the narcissist doesn't really value the people that they're surrounded with because of course they're not completely stupid they do look at it like if these people were actually any good they wouldn't support what I'm doing they would recognize that what I'm doing is wrong and then that's why they're so fascinated with you when you're no longer around them that's why they're still watching you because anyone would make this connection and assume that if they're cheating lying and stealing they're involved in all sorts of immoral and corrupt activities and yet you disapprove of that and you choose to move away from them obviously they're then going to see the value in you and idealize you because quite clearly you do not want to be a part of that so then in their eyes that means that you must be greater than them even if it just means that you're more intelligent because they're looking at their enablers and flying monkeys as though they're completely stupid that's exactly how they see them and just to really confirm that just look at celebrities many of them are narcissistic and if you look at it what do they really think of their fans do they look at their fans as being loyal and devoted or do they just see them as being stupid as being idiots for blindly following them while they're involved in all sorts of immoral and corrupt activities I mean just look at some of the things they're doing and yet they've still got many fans many supporters who are still following them do you really think they respect those people of course not it's exactly the same with the narcissist and their enablers and flying monkeys they do not respect those people and in fact they look at it like this the same way that celebrities view their fans because celebrities know that if it wasn't for their fans who are supporting them who are buying their music watching their movies if it wasn't for them then they wouldn't be earning any money so they're essentially like a teenager who has no choice but to depend on their parents financially so they become very resentful they feel like it's unfair because they're heavily dependent on their enablers and flying monkeys yes they secretly hate all of them and yet with you you woke up you didn't approve of what they were doing you managed to get away so then they recognize that you're not like everyone else they see that you're different and then that's why they become so fascinated with you because it's like I've got all of these other people wrapped around my thumb when I say jump they will say how high they will do whatever they want but then they're looking at you and you don't do that for them you're not willing to comply with their requests and in fact you're going in the opposite direction you're going a different way from everyone else I mean if you were going in the same direction doing the exact same things as everyone else you were listening to them following their demands complying with their requests there wouldn't be anything fascinating or mysterious about you it's not going to leave anything to the imagination because they see you're just following the crowd you're going the same way as everyone else so there's no need for them to watch you then they could just watch anyone because they're all doing the exact same thing but that's not what you're doing you're doing the opposite to everyone else everyone else is blindly supporting them following the agenda agreeing with everything they say enabling their toxic and dysfunctional behaviors but you're not you're not going along with a collective you're going the opposite way and not only are you going the opposite way but you look good doing it too all of these other people who are blindly following them they're not going anywhere but for you you're going the opposite direction and you're succeeding in doing that things are getting better for you by going against the collective by doing things differently to everyone else so of course they're going to be fascinated with you of course they're going to be watching you I mean of course if you were going the opposite way and everything was getting better for them and yet for you you chose to go in a different direction and then you went downhill things got worse for you they wouldn't be watching you then they wouldn't even care there's nothing fascinating or interesting about that the difference is not only are you going the opposite way to everyone else but things are improving things are getting better for you and that's just one thing they can't understand because remember the very grandiose they're arrogant they're delusional in their minds they're gods in their minds they know everything that is right and correct they know the right thing to do that's why they always had to have an authoritative position over you they've always got to be the boss they're going to be in charge they believe that they are the omega the almighty that they're never wrong they're always right and yet utilize this contradiction because if they're never wrong and they're always right how can you go off in the opposite direction and do better without them they can't understand it it baffles their minds it confuses them and yet at the same time they are fascinated so of course they can't keep their eyes off of you especially after everything they did to you because it's like they did all of these things and yet you're still getting on with it you're still able to do the things that you need to do and that's what really shocks them because you may not know this but the other victims or targets they've had in their lives they didn't manage to have such a lucky escape like you did a lot of the others they may have gone downhill or they may have remained trapped with the narcissist they didn't get so far as you did so of course it surprises them it baffles them because they look at you and you just keep coming back you just keep emerging from the gashes like a phoenix it's like there's no stopping you it's like there's nothing they can do and they may have tried every trick in the book they may have done all of these things to you they may have devalued you targeted your self esteem strangulated you with other people ghosted you discarded you cheated on you lied to you stole from you gaslighted your minds deflected all of their shame onto you shifted the blame they may have started a smear campaign against you turned everyone against you assassinated your character targeted you financially got you fired from your job they did all of these things they brought you down to the darkest steps to the lowest of the low to where it seemed like there was no light at the end of the tunnel it seemed like there was no possible way for you to get out they were watching you and still kind of poking you with a stick just to make sure are you still alive have I really done you in this time have I finished you off and then to their amazement you're still there you're still moving even if you're crawling on your hands and knees you crawl out of that pit that they left you in and somehow you managed to get yourself together you managed to get back on your feet and maybe you don't manage to restore yourself to your earlier condition before you got involved with them but you're still managing to get by you're still managing to do something you're progressing you're becoming more knowledgeable and aware you're more intuitive you're more awake you're more experienced now more wise and all of these things are threats to them because you threaten to expose them because at one point they had you confined they had you trapped and they were doing all of these things to you and now you know their secrets you have personal information about them and it's like you escaped from the prison you found the key to the door you unlocked it and then you ran away from their lair so now they've got to track you down or at least they've got to keep an eye on you they've got to keep you on close watch because you know things that they don't want you to know and not only that but they still fear that you could move on and while yes you may already be doing better without them they fear that you could move on and you could be doing better than them i mean you've got to look at it like this they have all of these enablers and flying monkeys all of these fake family members and friends all of these people are blindly supporting them why maybe because they don't see anyone who isn't following that agenda and doing better than them because if they did they'd probably be following them this is why you're such a threat this is why they have to keep a close eye on you because here's the thing if you're opposing their empire you're going in the opposite direction you're doing your own thing you're not following the collective you're not following the agenda and not only that but you're doing better without them and not just doing better without them you're doing better than them by going your own way then there's only one possible conclusion there's only one possible explanation and that is that what they're doing is not working what they're doing is not the right thing because if it was how could you leave and do better without them it's kind of like if you have a tribe and while you're in this tribe you're not really doing anything and yet the people in that tribe they just blindly follow the leader and they just kind of get on with things they're not really questioning anything they're not really questioning what they're doing or what they're getting out of it and then you you go against the tribe you disapprove of what the leader is doing you stand against them and then you decide to go in your own direction you decide to go your own way you really think that tribe is going to care if you go off and they don't really think anything of you you're not that great you don't have many strong abilities you're not going to be capable of surviving on your own you really think they're going to bat an eyelid over you they're not going to care they're just going to look at it like yeah you can go off on your own that's really what you want to do you're not going to make it very far you won't find any foods you might get eaten by a tiger that's exactly how they're going to think but if you are strong if you are powerful you're capable of going off on your own and doing better without the tribe or maybe not just doing better without the tribe but doing better than not only the leader of that tribe but doing better than all of them put together on your own if you go off and do that the why doesn't just every member of that tribe overthrow the leader and just follow in your direction I mean that would be the only logical and rational thing for them to do because that's the example that you are setting you're showing everyone that this is the best thing to do just forget about them and go in this direction if it's quite clearly working for you and of course they don't want you to send that message to them because they want to be the authority they want to tell people what to do so they have to create this narrative they have to keep a close eye on you even while they may be pretending that you're not anything like you don't even exist they have to keep watching you because otherwise that means the entire time they were wrong that means they were wrong about you that means that everything they said about you not being good enough you're not knowing what you're doing it means it means that they were wrong it means that they messed up and if they were wrong if they messed up then they got to go they can't be the leader of that tribe anymore because they just made a massive mistake I mean they were all just getting on with what they're supposed to do what they've been told and Jack here's you just approve of what they're doing the corrupt and immoral acts that they're engaged in you go in the opposite direction you do your own thing and you do better than all of them you do better than all of them which means that they're wrong and it means that you're right that's why they're so fascinated by you otherwise they wouldn't care if you're going off on your own you can barely even survive and they know just exactly how your life's going to pan out you're not going to get anywhere you're barely even going to make it you really think they're going to be worried about you of course not and this may have been the case with other people before you who were once a part of their lives maybe they also disapproved of things that the narcissist did they went off on their own the narcissist may not have batted an eyelid at those people because they already knew they're not going to get very far but they didn't think that way with you they knew no this one's different this one's better than the rest this one's going to surpass us all this one's going to achieve things we never expected at least not until it got to that point where they stood up against us where they disapproved of what we were doing because you see that's the only time that they actually realize your worth it's when you do stand up against them it's when you do disapprove of what they're doing because by doing that you are then realizing your worth which then makes it clearer to them i mean as long as you're just following them blindly and you're going along with their agenda you really think that they see any value in you when you're just letting them do whatever they want just going along with it no they think you're stupid but when you decide to go your own way then it's like this one's a smart one this one's on to me this one's not falling for my lies my future faking my gaslighting they're not following my false narrative they can see that i'm full of shit and they're not falling for it anymore and it's like what if this one goes off and shows everyone that i'm actually a fraud because if they can go off and they can do better that really reveals how corrupt their system is because if if their system is correct and it's good for everyone involved there's no way that you should be able to leave and do better outside of it i mean what does that reveal to everyone who is involved in that what does that tell them if you can just disapprove of it all and leave or if they can ostracize you they can cut you out they can isolate you and you go off on your own and things get better for you what does that say to everyone i mean the entire time you are a part of that collective things won't go in anywhere for you things didn't go anywhere for any of them and then finally they cut you out they ostracize you your life changes completely it just says their system is garbage it says they're all idiots they're all useless that's exactly what it says that it says that in fact you should be the leader you should be the one that they're following because if things aren't going well for them with what they're doing in the tribe that they're in and things won't go in well for you while you are in it and yet you leave or your ostracize from that group you go off and things get better for you quite clearly they're on the wrong team they should be with you but then should they because you disapprove of those things the corruption the immorality they decided to go along with it so maybe that is where they're meant to be maybe that is where they belong while you wanted better for yourself you wanted a life that was more righteous you wanted to follow the correct path and they weren't thinking of going that way with you and even if finally when you do succeed maybe some people see all things are getting better for you now and then they decided to come over onto your team no i wouldn't have that i wouldn't have that it should already be too late because they weren't with you back then when you stood up to the narcissist when you told them exactly how it is they weren't there for you then it's only when they see you moving on they see you succeed they witnessed the fruits of your labor then they want to come over to you when they realize that you're more powerful you're stronger it should already be too late but the odds are that most of them they're still going to stick with the narcissist all of their enablers and flying monkeys even your own family members and friends you may lose a lot of them they're still going to be over there they're still going to be in denial lying to themselves gaslighting themselves and instead all they're going to do is seek to destroy you because it's too painful for them to accept that their entire life was a lie it's too painful for them to accept the entire time they were lied to future fate gaslighted by the narcissist they don't want to accept that and they're still hoping longing and yearning but if they just hold on then maybe at some point in the future it will be worth the wait it will be worth everything that they invested into it and that's what keeps them holding on and that's why they were born together with the narcissist over your destruction that's why and they'll act like they don't care they don't care when they see you moving on when they see you succeed they lack like they're not concerned about it meanwhile they are watching your every move they're watching everything you're doing and they're envious and jealous of it they can't stand it they don't want to see you doing that because it just reminds them that this entire time they've been making a big mistake they were listening to the wrong person they were taking the wrong person's side all along and they just don't want to accept it especially since they were taking this side all of this time instead of being with you they already know you're not going to accept them after all of the things they did they know you're not going to take them back they know you're not going to support them they know that the best chance they've got is to continue on that path even if it isn't serving them and while you can move on you can succeed and maybe if they had just stuck with you you could have taken care of them you could have done all of these things for them improve their lives in ways that the narcissist never could they're not going to go along with you because they stood for that agenda all along they stuck by the narcissist so it's already too late for them for a lot of them but meanwhile they will still be watching you they're still going to be checking in see what you're doing and they're going to be hating on everything that they see they're not going to like it anything to do with your progression your comfort your safety your security anything positive about you they're not going to like because just reminds them that they've made a mistake it reminds them that they're going the wrong direction so it's kind of like they're going one way with their group their tribe the narcissist their flying monkeys and enablers and they want to make it look like what they're doing is good they're going the right way they can't have it where you're going the opposite direction and suddenly here you go you got a nice comfortable place where you stay you got all of the luxuries all of the food all of the resources they can't have it looking like that if you're going in the opposite direction they've got to make it look bad they've got to sabotage you they're going to make it look like you're struggling on your own because otherwise it's going to look very bad for them it's going to expose the corruption it's going to expose just how whack their system is because again if their system is functional if their system is there to support the members the followers and supporters of it rather than just the authority the management of it if that's really the case then if you seize to be a part of that system of that group you should not be doing better without it you shouldn't be because otherwise that really says a lot about them it just reveals that that system that group was holding you back the entire time if you can move on and do better without it that means that they should do without it as well but the narcissist does not want people to come to that conclusion because they're benefiting from it from having all of these people on their side who are blindly following them even while they're getting nothing out of it i mean if anything they have to sabotage you so that they can get something from you because they're never going to benefit from the system directly it's completely corrupt that's why they have to sabotage you because it's a corrupt system it doesn't benefit anyone involved other than the narcissist other than that it benefits no one and the narcissist is fully aware of that that's why they manipulate and gas like everyone involved and it's really sad when you look at it i mean when you get away from it all and then you look back and it's like you may feel sorry for some of them i mean in many ways it's like one of my favorite movies actually that's quite an old one but i don't know if any of you have seen this movie the island it's with um ewan mcgregor he's an irish actor and scarlet joe hansen i'm sure many of you will know her and shawn bean as well it's a brilliant movie if you haven't seen it you must watch it look it up online and it's just the way that these clones of the rich and the the celebrities as well they're all held captive in this um like this this underground base and they're all kept there they don't really know what's going on they're told that there is some kind of uh like virus outside and that's why they can find there and they're just clones of real people on the outside in the real world they're locked in there and they've got their own little community their own little world they're not really experiencing real life they're not reaching their full potential of what they could really be and so they're kept in there and they're manipulated they're gaslighted they're lied to there's also future faking as well where they're told about this lottery that they can win where they then get to go to this island which is kind of like selling them a vacation only it doesn't actually exist and if they do win that lottery they just get wired up to this machine where they are then indoctrinated even more or it's because the rich or the celebrity they finally need the parts of their clone because they got sick or whatever it is and then that's why they then disappear from the group so yeah definitely check out that movie one of my favorites is called the island and that's really how it is for the enablers and the flying monkeys of the narcissist they're all enslaved in these communities that are not even serving them and yet they're blindly following it because they're unaware they're at a very low level of consciousness and that's why when you do get away from it all you get away from these dysfunctional dynamics and things will get better for you but then they will try to pull you back into it because they don't want everyone else to know they don't want everyone else to see that if they would just separate themselves from the group things could get better for them it really could just as you will find that things can get better for you i mean that's what happens with me when i left my family and my social circle i went off on my own spent some time by myself i got away from the world the nine to fives this corrupt world that we live in i just spent some time by myself and for maybe just five months i researched about this disorder and then i built my channel as you can see here on youtube and then within just four months i already was monetized on youtube i had 1000 subscribers and then within the first one year i had achieved 30 000 subscribers within three years 100 000 and then before you know it i was traveling around the world within just a few months of creating the channel or rather within within one year after i created the channel i was already traveling the world i was renting luxury cars and that was actually it's actually my life and that's what happened from leaving their groups from leaving society and of course when you do that people get fascinated by you because they can't understand it they've been manipulated lie to gaslight of their entire lives and to go in in a certain direction thinking that it's right thinking that it's best for them they've been indoctrinated brainwashed and yet you you become awake you become aware you finally understood that something was wrong with it and that's why you then left so of course they're going to keep watching you because they greatly fear that things are going to get better for you and if things get better for you it's going to reveal to them that something is wrong with them and it's going to reveal to the enablers and flying monkeys something is wrong with the entire system because if your bads if all of these things are wrong with you how can you leave them and do better without them that doesn't make any sense and it's always been this way since the very beginning of human existence if you're not built to last if you're not built to survive if you're no good and you leave the group you leave the tribe you should die your life should fall apart things should get worse for you but it doesn't because you're better than them you're meant to start your own tribe things are meant to get better of them and the rest of them they're meant to die they're meant to be left behind because they're the idiots they're the foolish ones they're the ones who are going the wrong direction not you and this is what they don't want everyone to know they don't even want to become aware of that themselves they gas like themselves as well because just think about it no one wants to accept that they're the ones who are inadequate they don't want to accept that so they've got to watch you and they've got to sabotage you but of course the entire time you're not even watching them you're not even concerned about what they're doing because you already know or at least you should know if you have been watching my videos you should be aware of it but things aren't going to get better for them things never do get better for narcissists they're the ones who are watching you because while things may be predictable for them you already know how it's going to go for you they don't know there's a lot of mystery things can get a lot better for you and that's what they're afraid of because they don't want that to get back to their enablers and flying monkeys that this corrupt system that they're following this agenda this collective it's all just a waste of time it's not going to get them anywhere it's not going to leave them anywhere good and once you develop this confidence and self-assurance in yourself and you know that you're following the correct path you're going to look at them and it's all going to make perfect sense it's not going to leave any unpredictability any mystery to where they're going to go i mean you can look at their lives and you can already see where they're going to be in 10 20 years at the end of their lives you can see that they're never going to be happy and while for you it's like the sky's the limit as long as they don't keep coming back to sabotage you it's like you don't know where things could go and yet you wonder why when you look at them it's like they have no belief in themselves so then they don't want to believe in you even though deep down they do that's why they keep watching you if they had no belief in you and they just assumed that you were going to go down they would just leave you to it they'd just be like okay here's the rope go hang yourself but they don't do that they don't just give you the reins and let you go off on your own i mean think about it if they really thought that you're that bad things aren't going to go right for you you're the one who's corrupt they would just let you go they would just leave you to it knowing that at some point you're just going to die out you're just going to end up starved maybe you'll end up in a mental hospital in jail without them having to intervene so why do they keep watch why do they intervene why do they try to sabotage you it's because they know that if they didn't intervene then guess without them things would get a lot better for you at some level yes they know their system is corrupt their system is no good for them they know it already and yet all they want to do is support this false narrative sustain this illusion this false reality that their side is better when deep down all along they already know that it's not they already know i know this message is quite different to what i normally talk about and of course as you can see with my work which really does go against a lot of the systems in society today so i have a lot of experience in this and going off in my own direction away from the rest of society and doing my own thing that's how i'm able to talk about this for 50 minutes now and i could go on a lot longer as well but in all honesty it's the end of the day here it's uh about 11 p.m where i am so i do need to get some rest but i think i've done this topic justice i think i've given you a lot of food for thought a lot to think about and i know many of you are empaths chosen ones you're not following the collective and sometimes you may need that reassurance that confirmation that you're doing the right thing by keeping to yourself by not following the crowd because that's what i did and i want to serve as an example for that for developing our own identities our own individuality instead of just being a clone of everyone else think back to that movie the island one of my favorite movies definitely go and watch it anyway that's all i've got to say for this one but don't worry i will be back again tomorrow with another video anyway if you found it helpful hit the thumbs up button down below click subscribe and all notifications so that you will be notified when i do upload a new video and let me know what you thought about this in the comment section below i'd love to hear from you and if you would like to donate you can leave a super chat in the live chat or a super thanks in the comment section you can also go to my paypal it is paypal.me slash narc survivor and if you would like to book a one-on-one coaching session with me just go to my website it is narcsurvivor.co.uk and also follow me on instagram it's narcsurvivor youtube i'm uploading new pictures and videos of my travels every day to my stories on there again thank you all for joining me on another narc survivor live video supporting your true identity and your individuality thank you all i look forward to speaking with you in another live video very soon


In the previous module we started talking about solvation dynamics and then we went on to talk about solvation dynamics of water that is where we stopped and we did not go into a lot of detail but we said that if you take bulk water then the ultrafast solvation dynamics that you see there is not single exponential it is tri exponential or bi-exponential with the Gaussian component and in Fleming's work they have actually been able to assign each of these components to different kinds of motion of water including rotational motion liberational motion and so on and so forth. So and your homework was to read that 1994 nature paper and understand we also said that in confined medium the solvation by water becomes slower by orders of magnitude and that is explained once again we did not go into much detail but it is explained mainly by Bakchi's model one of which is exchange between bound and free water. So today we will discuss a different aspect of water what we will do is we will show you the vibrational spectrum of water and then we will discuss the different normal modes of water not isolated water but water as water liquid and there we will try to see what happens when one of the vibrational modes is excited how does the energy get dissipated how does it get redistributed in different normal modes of vibration and liberation. And this work is mainly by Elsie's group and our present discussion will focus on these three papers that are listed here there has been more work so it is up to you to go and read more recent literature in this topic so to start with let me show you a vibrational spectrum of liquid water and here the only difference between this and the vibrational spectrum that you usually record is that y axis is absorbance not percentage transmittance as it usually is with IR spectrum but this is a regular steady state FTIR spectrum. Now here you see three major features 1, 2, 3 and you see a broad feature here and a broad feature here what are they this one I think everybody knows the one between 3000 and 3600 700 centimeter inverse that is the OH stretch of water that is the strongest signal and that is what predominates whenever there is anything that contains an OH group you always see this broad absorption that is very well known the next one also I think is well known it is OH band. The third broad absorption here along with this even broader and less prominent feature is ascribed to liberation as we had perhaps talked about in the last module liberations are restricted rotation so your water molecules that want to rotate but then since the hydrogen bonded they are brought back so it is sort of wagging motion and you are all familiar with wagging motion in a molecule for IR. So here this is not within one molecule but it is in the intermolecular coupled system a particular water molecule wants to rotate but is brought back because it is hydrogen bonded this kind of motion is called liberational motion of course energy of this liberation motion would be much lesser than your stretch or bend and here it is this is actually called the L2 band the prominent liberational motion low frequency liberation of motion here you have some high frequency liberation of motion which is not very well defined but will play an important role in our discussions and what are these A, B and C we will come back to that later in a couple of slides. So the question that we are trying to adjust trying to understand is this ultrafast dynamics involved in coupling of these modes generally what is the meaning of normal modes that these modes of vibrations are independent of each other but in an in a correlated system associated system when you make one vibration happen it does affect the other vibration so you can think that what happens when hydrogen bonding is stronger what vibrations will be affected what happens when this bending takes place it affects the hydrogen bond dynamics right the moment it affects the hydrogen bond dynamics that is going to affect liberation of motions as well liberation of motion will be more or less depending on what happens to the hydrogen bond. So this is basically what we want to study and the reason why you have coupling between normal modes is if you look at the energy diagram this is what it is this one is OH stretch the biggest energy gap this is OH band and this is liberational motion they might remind you of some asymmetric vibration but the energy gaps are really really small as you can see this is the energy gap between 0 and 1 for OH stretch this is the energy gap between V equal to 0 and V equal to 1 for liberational motion much smaller and the notable feature here is if you look at the energy of V equal to 1 of the OH stretch manifold that has more or less the same energy as V equal to 2 of OH band right. So what happens when they are close what is it called what are the symmetries of vibration of water now C2 is the point group so what is the symmetry of this OH stretch symmetric stretch asymmetric stretch all that thing is there right the symmetric stretch is A1 what is bend you better look up. So what happens here is that since there is an energy match and there is a match of symmetry as well you have something called Fermi resonance in Fermi resonance energy can there is coupling between the modes and energy can get transferred between one mode and the other so it is not unusual to expect that if you excite OH stretch energy will go into OH band as well and then liberations have so many energy levels it is it may be quite expected that no matter which one you excite there will be energy transfer to liberations as well so finally when you make water molecule vibrate say excite the stretch that will that energy you give some energy for it to stretch right that energy will be dissipated by exciting bending motion and liberations as well and the times involved are always ultrafast because this V equal to 1 lives for about 200 femtosecond this V equal to 1 for OH band lives for about 170 femtosecond and we will see what happens when we look at the normal modes how they evolve okay. So just a reminder L2 liberation is rotational motion hindered by hydrogen bond so if this L2 band shifts to lower frequencies what does it indicate that means hydrogen bonds are weakened yeah so these are things that we will be looking for OH bending mode now OH bending mode generally we do not even pay attention to this in bulk water because each water molecule in any case is surrounded by so many water molecules but in a when you are going to make measurements in femtosecond time scale you need to take into account little more of a detail. And if you are going to work with water clusters where you have small number of water molecules which you can prepare artificially then also this becomes important this is what is actually known from this water cluster kind of experiment it is known that OH bending modes first of all depend the frequency of the OH bending modes it depends on number of intermolecular hydrogen bonds per molecule. So if it is equal to 4 then you have a higher frequency vibration if the number of intermolecular hydrogen bonds per molecule is less than 4 then you get a shift so the 4 seems to be a sort of a magic number here it does not matter whether you have well how many can you have per molecule that is another question the reason why 4 is a magic number how many hydrogen bonds can be there for water there can be 4 right you cannot have more than that so if it is not 4 for some reason then if some hydrogen bonds are broken then there is one kind of lower frequency vibration and if it is 4 if whatever number of hydrogen bonds could be formed is formed then you have a higher frequency vibration. So this is something that is known so the important pathway for energy transfer to surrounding hydrogen bonded network would be of course by coupling with intermolecular vibrational modes so the experiment that is done is pump a particular vibrational mode and probe all vibrational modes so this is an IR pump IR probe experiment okay pump by a femtosecond pulse in IR not visible or UV and probe in IR as well with that background we can come back to the earlier diagram and now I can tell you what these are this A B C these are the 3 spectra these are the spectra of 3 kinds of excitation frequencies used when you excite by C and I will tell you what the wavelength is then you essentially excite OH stretch when you excite this by using B you excite OH bend when you excite by A you essentially excite liberation of course it might have been better if you could excite here but there might have been a limitation of the experimental setup okay and these are the frequencies then 3150 centimeter and remember what I showed you earlier is a spectrum not a here this is actually a spectrum same scale and you will remember that a femtosecond pulse cannot be completely monochromatic there is always a spread of energies so what we are showing here is the modal frequency maximum of that spectrum IR spectrum so when you excite the OH stretching mode that has been done by using pulses which have maximum at 3150 centimeter inverse OH bending mode is excited using 1650 centimeter inverse maxima pulses and high frequency liberations are excited by 1350 centimeter inverse okay another reason for not exciting low frequency liberation is that I mean where will the energy go you can only have liberations if you pump at low frequency liberation right only when you excite something at higher energy can that energy go to lower energy modes if you pump a lower energy mode that energy cannot you cannot have joining up of photons in this case at least okay so remember this is a spectrum and this is a truncated spectrum actually as I think the probe had a little bit of limitation and in any case it makes no sense to probe the OH stretching mode the only thing that you can see there is a ground state bleach that is going to recover. So here the study is focused on mainly 1650 centimeter inverse what is that OH bending mode right and here you have all the liberations so what do you have before going into each of these quantitatively if you see when you excite the OH stretching mode remember OH stretching mode is how much 3150 centimeter inverse you get a bleach at 1700 centimeter inverse or so what does that mean why would there be a bleach when you pump the why would there be a bleach for the OH bending mode when you pump at OH stretch you pumping OH stretch and we see there is a ground state bleach in OH bend why would that happen and this is not nanoparticle nothing we will talk about nanoparticles later this is just liquid water what is the meaning of ground state bleach in this case population at v equal to 0 goes down population at some higher vibrational level goes up that is a hint total population more or less the same stretch yeah we pump by stretch then what happens I actually shown you the result already you have to connect with what I have shown you something that I have shown you the population of bend why remember Fermi resonance what happens in Fermi resonance there is direct energy transfer that means population of v equal to 2 yes population of v equal to 2 of OH bend takes place by direct energy transfer from the stretch remember yeah so a pump here right and that is v equal to 1 so there is energy transfer right so some population of v equal to 2 will be there so naturally there is depopulation of this OH bend energy transfer is taking place so it is an excited well vibrational excited state phenomenon that would cause that ground state bleach and here you see this transient absorption positive signal also coming for OH that is because of population of higher state okay so there is this Fermi resonance this is clear signature of that now what happens here there is ground state bleach of L2 as well and there is ground state bleach here little bit of growth here difficult to analyze this data but it happens that means since there is a bleach of L2 vibration that means L2 vibrations are also they also get excited that means energy gets transferred from stretch to bend and also to liberation so question is is it direct or is it 2 step now what happens when you excite OH bending more directly so here also you get a ground state bleach which is expected because you are exciting that particular vibration and you get this excited state absorption that is also expected once again you get a ground state bleach here and here you see it is a little different you see a buildup the buildup is stronger in high frequency vibrational mode you see that a little better which means when you make the molecule bend what is happening hydrogen bond network is affected and that is what will affect liberation as the that is what is taking place that is also sort of energy transfer and what happens when you excite high frequency liberations once again there is a ground state bleach here and once again there is this lower frequency transient absorption remember what we said about this higher frequency and lower frequency business for bending motion yeah yes if number of hydrogen bonds is less than 4 then you get this lower frequency absorption so that is why this might seem a little strange that I am exciting lower energy liberations and I see a ground state bleach in comparatively higher energy bend that is because by doing this exciting this lower energy liberations high frequency liberation what you do always is that you are moving like this hydrogen bonds will be affected they will be weakened that is why you get this phenomenon here so this is something very interesting because you might not at first glance expected right you might think that you excite lower energy what will happen this is what happens because we are not working with isolated molecules here it is a hydrogen bonded associated liquid and again you see there we see a rise of high frequency liberation again we see a ground state bleach here. Now qualitatively I think we understand what is going on quantitatively if you look at the traces this is what you see when you excite high frequency liberations directly the rise is actually instantaneous this little bit of what looks like a slope that is because of the instrument response function you are not using a delta pulse anyway when you excite OH bending mode do you see the rise yeah this one is instantaneous now compare this with this this is the instantaneous part and there is a rise why is there a rise look at this energy diagram once again excite the OH bending mode it is it leaves so 170 femtosecond and in this 170 femtosecond it can either come back to be equal to 0 or it can transfer energy to liberation the rise time that we get here is about 170 femtosecond which means that almost all the energy that you provide in OH bending goes into liberation mode that is why that higher V states of liberation actually grow it is no longer just instantaneous a little bit of instantaneous part will always be there because remember we are working with non monochromatic pulses so direct excitation is bound to be there and then you are exciting this high frequency liberations as well a little bit but that rise is very prominent and the rise is 170 femtosecond when you excite OH stretching mode then you see that instantaneous part decreases even more and just to the eye has in the growth become more prominent and has in the growth become longer yeah you can see it if you compare these here so here what happens is in fact there are 2 rise times now analysis of this kind of data is always problematic to fit a rise time itself is a non trivial task in order to fit kinetics to more than one rise time requires a lot of confidence as you know if you increase the number of parameters it is going to fit better anyway so your data quality has to be very good and you must be very confident about what you are doing you must make sure that you are just not making up some story that is not right so there are again model becomes important and 2 rise times here sort of okay because here you see 2 kinds of energy transfer one is from here to from stretch to bend and then from bend to here okay so again we are only providing you an overall view of this paper please read the paper and see how the data is analyzed so what they have done really is that they have fitted the entire thing to a kinetic scheme so it is like an intermediate right A to I to P when you do that you get a kinetic equation and that is what you have to fit your data to you cannot just fit to 2 rise or anything okay that is what they have done and they have extracted the 2 times they turn out to be 170 and 200 femtosecond so this is the thing when you pump high frequency liberations okay I do not have to go through each part of it but when you pump high frequency liberation this is what happens you get a broadband enhanced absorption rising towards small frequency which means again energy transfer is taking place and here you get this less than 100 femtosecond decay that is limited by the laser pulse and a very weak 0.9 picosecond component so that slow component is there it is not as if it is not there 0.9 picosecond means what 900 femtosecond okay you might not seem very slow but it is at least slower than less than 100 femtosecond so what this means this broadband enhanced absorption not easy to handle what it means is that when you excite the high frequency liberations then part of the energy goes right away and part of it goes a little slower which is may not be unexpected because there is always a period of this kind of liberation and motion 600 to 950 centimeter inverse there is a fast bleach and that is because of and because there is a shift of liberation L2 band to lower frequencies see what is happening here here something is rising is not it do you see the signal becomes more than 0 at the very end beyond 600 centimeter inverse so why is there a bleach here there is a bleach because due to high frequency liberations one thing that definitely happens is this hydrogen bond network is disrupted so like bending liberation also moves to lower frequencies if hydrogen bond is disrupted that is why you see that bleach and OH bending absorption there is a slight shift to lower frequency that we have already discussed why when you excite OH bend then in early time you get a bleach of v equal to 0 to v equal to 1 transition time constant is 170 femtosecond broad absorption at lower frequencies later for longer times you see there is a red shift of this absorption and liberation absorption gets reshaped why does that take place once again because of disruption of hydrogen bonded network okay and that is what is sort of discussed in this last paragraph and finally when you excite OH bend you see an instantaneous rise in the 1400 to 1610 centimeter inverse 1400 to 1610 and initial decay is 170 femtosecond as discussed already this is a v equal to 1 to 2 transition of the OH bending mode 1 to 2 longer times the signal is due to overall red shift of the liberation absorption okay and OH stage I think we have already discussed this for me resonance we do not have to go through it once again. So finally the story that we get is that of coupled vibration and this is I like this because it is a good example of how one can use pump probe technique to look at very intricate interactions that take place in a coupled system. So there they have looked at water because you know water is ubiquitous that is the liquid of life but one can think of experiments that one can design similar experiments on things that are more complicated of course IR experiment in presence of water if you want to look at motion of biomolecules for example this could be a good way to go the complicating factor there is that biomolecules are always in water water always has its very strong absorption because it is a solute anyways present in much more so unless you have absorption in some other region it may be difficult to follow but it may not be impossible. So finally this is the picture that has come out of the whole study you excite this I think this is taken from a movie that must be available in the somewhere on the website or in the associated contents of the paper but excite in 100 femtoseconds this is the situation hydrogen bond if I put it very qualitatively what happens is that within the first 100 femtoseconds the hydrogen bonding network is weakened and then longer times 3 picosecond or so hydrogen bonds actually get broken and that is what shows up in this red shift of bending vibration frequency and in shift of liberation frequency as we have discussed. So that is the story of how energy migrates from one mode to the other in associated systems like liquid water so I do not know whether anybody has done followed this up later on it might be interesting to look at forget biomolecules for the moment even water so water confined in a reverse micelle or water at the surface of a protein bound water what kind of energy migration do you have in case of bound water or inside a vesicle or maybe inside a cell for that matter but of course for that we want to do it inside a cell you have to work with an IR microscope not impossible it is a set we do not have it IR microscope coupled with femtosecond IR that is a problem but this paper is important because the thing is unfortunately in today's world a lot of research is driven by impact factor which is completely wrong and this paper is published in Jeff Eskeme which is the least impact factor in the Jeff Eskeme family it does not matter it is very good fundamental work and I think it is an indicator of lot of possibility that can open up in this kind of experiments for especially for water in confined environments and perhaps for other molecules as well okay so that is what I think is one of the most important pieces of work in this field in the last 10 15 years or so.


Alright so there are many of us who have not had the best undergrad GPA and I mean I don't want to take anything away from anybody that may have had a lower GPA than me but I consider myself among those ranks. Like I didn't have the best undergraduate GPA for a PA school I would say. I was hovering right above a 3.0, maybe like a 3.2ish somewhere around there I can't remember we have to go back to some other videos to talk about that but for PA school that wasn't hitting for me because you know I didn't have like that many health care experience hours and my initial personal statement was trash and so for those of us that may fall into that realm we're like okay well what do we do I want to be a PA I want to get into the PA school how can I do that well this video is for you. So again I had a question posed by one of you lovely subscribers so if you haven't already done so go ahead and subscribe to my channel it says this one is from Victoria Davino and she said if you have an undergrad GPA of 2.5 but then a cumulative of post grad science course has taken all good grades cumulative is 3.1 what should I do go back and get another bachelor's how can I increase my drunk undergrad mess ups lol. Alright Victoria I mean I honestly I feel for you you know I know what it's like to not do your best I guess because you're just undergrad is like supposed to be fun like you know not everybody is like man I want to just be in these books and although I was kind of like in the middle I was a little bit lukewarm that affected me getting into PA school a lot sooner than I could have possibly gotten in and so I feel your pain I feel your your your desire to figure out what you're going to do and so for me I had to kind of resolve this in myself and I think that that is something that you will have to do as well what is it that you're looking for and everybody we all need to think about this okay like let's be realistic with things like what am I trying to get into PA school are my stats like these are some questions that you're gonna have to ask when am I trying to get in are my stats where they need to be what am I willing to do to get into PA school so Victoria sitting up here contemplating do I get another bachelor's degree for me that wasn't an option if I already had a bachelor's degree I'm not going to get another bachelor's degree that's just not an option for me so I'd be like okay do I get a master's degree or do I do a post-bac and that is something that I was seriously contemplating I went to undergrad specifically for medicine more so to be an OBGYN I had a family I've told you guys this story I've realized that you know I didn't want to spend too much time away from my family I love my family and so I wanted to ensure that I could still do what I really wanted to do which was take care of people while at the same time taking care of my family and so for that I was like okay I want to be a PA but how can I go about doing this because what I'm at with my GPA and my science GPA and my health care experience hours is not really where it's at so I had to do a serious reevaluation and I looked at doing a master's degree program and like some one of these like I think it was like hematology it was like a clinical scientist master's degree and I was really really close to doing that you guys because I got an amazing scholarship offer and I was like okay all right this makes this a little bit more palatable I'm not gonna have to spend too much money out of pocket I'll come out with a master's degree and then at the end of the day I'll be able to now apply to PA school because I know I'm gonna kill this master's degree I had every intention of doing extremely well in that and I'll be able to get a job at get health care experience hours at the same time be a PA be applying to PA school and I looked at that seriously and I was like all right well what is this time like lying like okay is it going to be two years is it gonna be three years the degree that I was going to do was a little over a year like 18 months or so a year and a half I would get my degree if I can go on to do other things or add other like certificates to that if I wanted while working and then yeah at the same time apply to PA school but more went into that I had to find living arrangements it was way out of state I didn't know anybody like family wise in that state although I had lived there previously I would literally have to like uproot my whole family and move to the state simply for a bridge and for me that didn't make sense you know it didn't make sense for me to now do a master's degree only as a bridge to get into PA school because I there there were so many other things that I had to pay for and do with my life that I couldn't do that now Victoria on the other hand maybe you're like single you maybe let's say you live at home with your parents and then that may be something that you're able to do and if it is do it whatever it is that you're able to do to get yourself into PA school or that most closer to PA school absolutely do it if you can be realistic with yourself and you're like you know what I remember subscribing to Donna's channel and she said think realistically what is my plan what am I going to do then absolutely say all right you know I can take a gap year I can take two gap years and apply and that is some of the things that I don't think that we as pre-PA students like wanting this career so badly we don't really think about we don't think about alright you know what let me just take some time I do have some time to just relax kind of get my bearings underneath me get some patient care experience hours and get this thing done because PA school you guys I'm not I'm not I'm never gonna stop saying this PA school is competitive to get into okay it is highly competitive you have a lot of students applying to programs that are offering and an average 30 seats okay and you have thousands of students applying to this these programs so you have to make sure that you are the best version of yourself a lot of us want to be perfect we want to have the best scores and the highest but it's not always about being perfect a lot of times it's about just being the perfect you I guess you can say the best version of you if this is where you can get at this mark and this is where you're setting yourself up for this is your this is your goal and you've reached your goal then apply and do that okay so Victoria for you I don't know you have to I would need more information in terms of what where you're at in life would you get another bachelor's degree if you have already already have bachelor's degree go ahead and look for master's programs or post-bac programs that will allow you to also get the science out credit hours and your overall cumulative hours because honestly like when you're sitting out at 3.1 let's look at what your science GPA is and if that is what you were saying you're you're saying all good grades post-grad science course is taken if your science GPA is a 3.1 you still need to ensure that your overall cumulative GPA is greater than a 3.0 and that science GPA actually needs to be raised a little if you looked at my last video where I talked about the stats that PA students are getting into schools with the average student is getting when with like a 3.5 overall GPA and like a science GPA of about a 3.3 3.4 so you have to be in that range okay alright thank you guys so much for this question thank you Victoria for leaving that comment if you haven't left a comment ever on my channel take this moment right now this is your chance leave a comment for me so that I can answer your questions I do look at them you guys follow me on Instagram at adana the PA as well as on Instagram at get that C University you can check us out on get that C University now come and see what we have to offer we have a lot of things for pre-PA students to help you get into PA school and we have like quizzes and things like that for PA students to help them get through PA school okay so if you're looking for something that is a little bit more geared and focused to you get that C University comm is the place to be alright thank you guys I will talk to you guys next time


Hello, I'm Steve Nunn, President and CEO of the Open Group. Welcome to Toolkit Tuesday, where we highlight the various components and leading experts of the Architects Toolkit, a collated portfolio of the most pertinent technology standards for enterprise architects. During the series, I'll be calling on a number of recognised experts who will bring their particular insights on how to most effectively use the various tools in the Architects Toolkit. We'll have a mix of interviews, panel sessions and pre-recorded presentations along the way. While all standards of the Open Group are designed so they can be adopted independently of one another, the greatest value for an organisation can be derived when they're used in unison. The sum of the parts should be greater than the whole. In the Architects Toolkit, we have collated a portfolio of the most pertinent ones for architects, together, all in one place. For most of these tools, set-ification from the Open Group is also available, so practitioners can demonstrate that they have the skills required and recruiters can take the guesswork out of the recruitment process, all backed up by our Open Badges programme. Here at the Open Group, we have a proud record of creating and maintaining standards, frameworks, reference architectures, tools, models and guides that have proven to be invaluable to the enterprise architecture community, whether they are industry-wide or aligned to specific vertical sectors. What they all have in common, though, is that they've been created by leading experts in their associated field, based on industry best practices, adopting a thought-leadership approach, ensuring that they meet the exacting needs of their audience. All these documents reside in the Open Group library and represent an extensive new body of knowledge that enterprise architecture practitioners can use to support the development of enterprise architectures whether as part of their digital transformation activities or otherwise. The Togaf series guides contain guidance on how to use the Togaf framework. They are expected to be the most rapidly developing part of the Togaf document set. While the Togaf framework is expected to be long-lived and stable, guidance on the use of the Togaf framework can be industry, architectural style, purpose and problem-specific. Next, we'll briefly review a few of these components in more detail. The Togaf standard provides a framework for effective enterprise architecture delivery and is supported by a set of documents that provide specific guidance about how to use and adapt it to support new trends. It is the most prominent and reliable enterprise architecture standard, ensuring consistent standards, methods and communication among enterprise architecture professionals. Those professionals who are fluent in the Togaf approach enjoy greater industry credibility, job effectiveness and career opportunities. This open standard-based approach helps practitioners avoid being locked into proprietary methods, utilise resources more efficiently and effectively and realise a greater return on investment. Open Agile Architecture, a standard of the open group, was consciously designed keeping the needs of all business stakeholders in mind. A product-centric organisation is composed of cross-functional teams which are responsible for developing products or services and operating or running them, with each member bringing expertise from their own domain. The OAA standard provides a framework and common language for your teams to function effectively to develop and deliver a collaborative, nimble operating model that enables success. The digital enterprise is shaped by people who work in the context of an enterprise's organisation and culture that needs to evolve towards agility at scale. Agile teams drive the enterprise's digital transformation by inventing new business models, delivering superior customer experience, developing digital products and architecting highly automated operating systems. Open Agile Architecture takes an outcome-based product-centred approach to enable enterprises to respond to customer needs in a more nimble and agile manner. To illustrate the synergy between standards, we see the value that Togaf and Open Agile Architecture standards bring together, providing an improved overall outcome when used to drive digital transformation. The Togaf standard is an enterprise architecture framework that delivers efficient and effective enterprise architecture to support organisational transformation for different use cases and architecture style. And the Open Agile Architecture provides guidance on how an organisation should address digital and business transformation in an agile manner. The Archimate 3.1 specification, a standard of the Open Group, is an open and independent modelling language for enterprise architecture that is supported by different tool vendors and consulting firms. The Archimate language enables enterprise architects to describe, analyse and visualise the relationships among architecture domains in an unambiguous way. This insight helps stakeholders to design, assess and communicate the consequences of decisions and changes within and between these architecture domains. Here we see an example of using the Archimate language to model enterprise risk management. The IT for IT reference architecture standard was originally created to manage the business of IT, enabling business insight across the IT value chain, increasing focus on business outcomes and improving agility. However, with the soon to be released version 3.0 of the standard, the focus has changed towards a digital value network, allowing you to architect your digital product portfolio for both internal and external consumers with the digital product backbone supporting the convergence of business and IT and the co-creation of strategy. The Open Group Security Forum manages and updates the Open Fair factor analysis of information risk, body of knowledge, comprised of the risk taxonomy, ORT standard and the risk analysis, ORA standard. The Open Group risk taxonomy standard provides a standard definition and taxonomy for information security risk as well as information regarding how to use the taxonomy. The Open Group risk analysis, ORA standard, provides risk analysts with the specific processes necessary to perform effective Open Fair risk analysis. Using the Open Fair risk management stack guides an organization through the chain from using an accurate risk model through meaningful measurements and effective comparisons which in turn lead to well-informed decisions and effective management. Zero Trust reflects a transition from the traditional approach of perimeter-based security to a security operating model that is business-enabling and data-centric. The Open Group ZTA Working Group is an industry-wide initiative to establish standards and best practices for Zero Trust as the overarching information security approach for the digital age. The Zero Trust Architecture Working Group is a collaboration between the Open Group Security Forum and Architecture Forum. One of the early outputs from the Zero Trust Architecture Work Group is the Zero Trust Core Principles which you can see here. The digital practitioner body of knowledge standard, also known as the DP Box standard, was created by the Open Group to develop and promote an understanding of what it means to be digital and to establish best practices for organizations providing a digital customer experience. The DP Box standard is intended to assist individuals and organizations who wish to create and manage product offerings with an increasing digital component or to lead their organizations through digital transformation. It provides guidance for the digital practitioner, whether based in a traditional IT organization, manufacturing unit, sales, customer support or embedded in a cutting-edge integrated product team. The DP Box standard describes tools and techniques across the 12 competencies which are divided into four competency categories, founder, team, team of teams and enduring enterprise. Here we see a long-term view of the portfolio of standards at the Open Group. I'm going to pick on one since we've covered the rest already. The Togaf series guide for microservices architecture. The purpose of this soon-to-be-released guide is to contribute to the Open Group mission of boundaryless information flow by providing guidance on how the architect can use the Togaf 9.2 standard to develop, manage and govern microservices architecture or any architecture where MSA is part of the scope. This should promote the shared understanding of the MSA creation process according to the principles of distributed architecture and significantly strengthen the alignment between the cultures of business and information technology. The further adoption of MSA as an architecture style and a cloud environment would result in the use of the method, metamodel references and other Togaf facilities. All of the Open Group standards are published in the Open Group library. I hope you have a better understanding now of why we created the Architects Toolkit and why this portfolio of tools and resources works even better together. I look forward to sharing more insights on the next Toolkit Tuesday. Next time I'll be joined by my colleague Andrew Josie, VP of Standards and Certification at the Open Group who will be taking us on a guided tour of the Open Group library. I'm Steve Nunn, thank you for watching Toolkit Tuesday.