Hello and welcome to part 9d of our reading of the Magdalen manuscript We're in the section of one woman story if you have missed the previous episodes There is a link down in the description box below both on YouTube and on rumble where you can find the previous episodes So today we're gonna get started on page 222 and I had been called by an island in northern sky and by a great teacher into the wind a Few months after my chicka-teague experience. I saw a video that sounded a lot like my teacher in the wind And so it was that I packed up my daughter's clothes my business bought a van and packed it for the road trip I was going west to write the teachings of this great master and to work on my unfinished business so that I would be ready There are memories I hold dearly from that cross-country trip with a six-year-old and an eight-year-old We camped at night our modest older Volkswagen West follow wedge between huge converter buses and motor mansions Linen tablecloths and silver goblets emerged from our turtle shell and while our neighbors stuffed themselves in plastic chairs Outside of their 200,000 motorhome guzzling beer We breakfast on egg benedict and served our grilled cheese sandwich with our crust trims and drank our tea from silver goblets I sat in a pool of water But he forced you falls in West Virginia the day my briefing was given to the executive branch of the White House Laughing under the pelting warm water. I could have stayed for for briefing for the glory of saying I'd been there But I chose the waterfall instead It was the 4th of July 1986 and it seemed a more fitting statement to make about freedom to sit on a waterfall rather than to sit in the Oval Office of the Reagan White House. I Experienced my first ever migraine in Elk Creek, Kentucky My head was pounding and I thought I'd better stop driving It was early afternoon when we pulled into the Elk Creek campground I picked a campsite as the blinding pain sent me driving underneath covers for darkness Next door to our camping site Elsa permanently camped every summer She's drawn Christmas tree lights and had fake grass laid out on the on the entire breadth of her space Her wooden sign announced her encampment to the constant stream of family and guest as I passed out from the pain I held a vague memory of seeing Jenny and Adrienne wonder over and enter Elsa's picket fence where she held court on a lawn chair picking beans a little Chihuahua by her side. I awoke hours later Electrally rewired as I was to be for years from these headaches that always took me down for what seemed like days I was horrified. How long had I slept? Where were the girls? I had no intention of letting them out of my sight on this trip having heard so many horror stories of children disappearing on their way To the bathroom at a campground. I pulled back the curtain on the van window and allowed the wanting and allowed the waning light To have dust to penetrate my optic nerve only when seeing slightly There were the girls picking beans with Elsa next door. God I thought what on earth will she think of me? I've been gone for however long asleep in a van when my children roamed around She was an older woman and I learned to be frightened of them having been erased by one. I stumbled my way to the door and over through the little gate beneath Elsa's place at Elk Creek sign The girls greeted me excitedly and begged to show me the tricks Elsa's Chihuahua could do Elsa agreed and they dispatched a little dog to fetch a drink The little snippet of short white hair raced into the camping trailer and dragged out a can of beer ferociously he growled and minutes didn't drag the can back and forth across the fake grass Slamming it into the lawn chairs clawing and scratching at its pop-up until it began to leak beer Gleefully he then laid back pulling the can over him catching every drop as gravity drew the liquid down his throat So Elsa said to me the girls tell me you're taking them off to some island Way up in northern sky smack dab in the middle of nowhere. You got a good reason for doing that Fear clutched at my throat was she going to judge me for this was I going to buckle under scrutinization Could I think of some lie to justify this action on my part? No, I heard myself say I don't have a good reason for doing this. I just want to Good Elsa said I never saw happiness come from anything done for a good reason. I Knew then we were on a magical journey of spirit not mind It continued from philosophical conversations with old folk singers on a riverboat along the Missouri To saving a frog in a whirlwind on the white river in the badlands in South Dakota I like Missoula, Montana so much that I got down on my knees in front of the van outside of a Chinese restaurant and cut It a deal. I promised my van that whenever broke down I'd consider that as a sign that we were supposed to stay there Then I started the engines silently hoping it wouldn't start. It started We continue until we ran out of land at the edge of a little town in northern Washington State We boarded a ferry on the way to the island whose I call I heard all the way back east The three of us huddled against the wind in the bow of the boat and saw to the recognition as home approached Hear my heart saying hear my soul breathed with joy and recognized divinity Here where cliffs at the sea entwined with a chain as ancient as memory. I found some sense of place I had never known before But no one was expecting us. There were no banners out that read welcome We have been waiting for your arrival sit down now and write the books you were called to write. Here's your paycheck Reluctantly we stayed as long as we could but since no one made an offer we headed off either to the Southwest or home We can make that decision along the way But we were so close to a huge snow cone called Mount Rainier that I couldn't see how we could just be that close and not climb it It was after all right there in front of us begging for a pilgrimage Alas after climbing all the way up the engine finally blew on the way down and there we were stranded or was it gifted a Blown engine would take a minimum of two weeks. I called home and had the same experience We had nightly when we tried to call We got the phone machine when I finally got through to the girl's father telling him we were stranded He didn't say oh Let me fly out and take care of this. Are you all right? What can I do to help you? Let me fly you home right now and study said so what does this mean to me? We never returned Through the next five years I was a single mother living with eagles and whales on the island in northern sky since their father was on the other Coast he wasn't around to take them on weekends or overnight so there were no off nights for me No weekends alone life was full-time all the ear infections continued Through all the born-again virgin years. I had one mantra.  I have not looked at bring forward my fears my jealousies and my insecurities Bring it all forward and let me work on it now. So be it Occasionally I must admit I added a line to my mantra The Lord God of my being and to the mother father within I call forth all my unfinished business bring it all forward And I may finish it so I'll be ready to meet the mate of my being The girls and I were so close during those years that we couldn't button a sliver between us We were all we had We lived on 900 a month for most of those years Once I sat down with both Jennifer and Adriana and we talked about what to do. I worried constantly about money I explained that we could move back to DC and I can make a lot of money again And their clothes could come from Bloomingdale's again as they once did Now their clothes came from secondhand rows. I Explained that I wouldn't be as available as I am now But that we could have help and they could take music and dance and have the things they didn't have We had managed to hang on to nice winter Rental with large rooms and beautiful furnishings, but it was no longer in the budget though We though we moved out of it every summer and sort of floated around until we could have it back in the fall But it was still out of the price range now And we faced a wall of expenses, especially if I was going to try to produce a book They listened patiently to my presentation of our financial situation and they both intoned simultaneously. Oh, no We came here so you could live your dream. You mustn't give up your dream We can move somewhere cheaper. Nothing will ever work if you don't live your dream And so it was that we located to a deserted trailer with missing ceiling panels and allowed and allowed Insulation blackened with mildew to hang down into each room to say the roof leaked was a gross understatement We had no furniture with us and couldn't afford to move our furniture from DC So we acquired enough furnished loosely translated please our single wide on the beach We got our queen-sized foam mattress in the dump. It was v-shaped with a deep crevice in the middle We all slept together me in the middle one little girl on either side I slept with little arms and legs sprawled all across me We turned as one tangled mass sometimes getting caught in each other's lips It seemed to always have a little I seem to always have a little arm across my face I loved sleeping that way of all the things I felt anger at their father for somehow every Christmas I resented him most He had all the Christmas ornaments and lights in his comfortable four bedroom home and rest in Virginia The one his father had made sure he continued to live in he never used an after we left I've since discovered but he wouldn't shift them to us And so we had no Christmas ornaments and certainly could waste money buying any One year our dear friend the island doctor brought us ornaments from his tree so we could have something to hang One year we couldn't afford a tree So a friend brought us a tree from high atop a mountain on an island where he had logging rights It was a hemlock tree with beautiful green branches much prettier than the trees of Christmas pass We hung a few little ornaments on it strung it with popcorn and Matarona back berries admired it and went to bed when we woke in the morning The girls ran out to see their tree only to find it all over the carpet Hemlock trees drop their green needles inside We were picking hemlock needles out of the carpet for days That was the Christmas of Madura branch. I thought it was quite a statement for the environment itself No tree had to die and a Dan dead branch got honored I don't think the girl shared my altruistic opinion of that particular dead branch We fixed the roof and slowly repaired the ceiling tiles holy back the deadly installation finally But only after dozens of ear infections and one by one we each had thrashed in the boiling temperatures of viral meningitis I remember slipping through the dimensions and twirling through the underworld a hell of sweat and burning My head didn't hurt hurt doesn't even come close to what the agony felt like it felt like my morrow was being boiled Well, I was still in body and I ached me on the world and into this next so I've talked about this before the last time I was in India. I got really really really sick. I get sick every time I'm in India But this time I had gotten in an infection from fecal matter. I know that sounds gross But my friend Mark and I were rescuing dogs while we were in school We were not in class. We were rescue these dogs so we would jump in and out of the ditches where the puppies were and I guess Moving in and out of ditches and then petting the dogs and then it got in my my mouth. It was human fecal matter It's common for an India for men, especially to be able to go to the bathroom outside and that is literally the sickest I have ever been in my whole entire life and I've got some pretty gnarly sicknesses in my life But I know what she's talking about my fever got so high I was in the hospital in India for days on end my stomachs was swollen and got really it's what I was I was Vomiting it was coming out everywhere But yet my stomach was swollen and I remember at one point literally laying in the bed. My fever was so high I Literally thought I was gonna die and I kind of wanted to because if I was just in so much pain No matter what medication they give me gave me no matter what I took The pain would just not subside I remember just crying in the bed because I was just in so much freakin pain And so I understand what she's talking about here and even though it's disgusting that that happened to me I do feel like that was That needed to happen Because I do feel like something broke through and that's something you learn in the East, right? We've talked about this before Viruses fevers that kind of stuff there. That's not a bad thing, right? It upgrades you it's a purging that upgrades you these viruses sometimes are necessary And I felt like that was very very necessary. That was right before our world locked down that that happened And so I understand what she's saying Two horrific storms hit the island while we were in our trailer years each was labeled a hundred-year storm Supposedly so ferocious it could only happen once in a hundred years We lived on the north shore of okra's island during both of them power was lost early on and water followed We'd a tiny Kent wood stove in the living room in a single wide I filled one wall with the kitchen with wood and sealed black plastic over the inside of the windows in the sliding door And taped us in I forced myself outside in the wind only once a day to restock the wood I set an alarm clock to feed the stove every two hours through the night But we survived in that trailer when everyone else fled the north shore Two other single mothers deserted their huge homes in below freezing cold And we laid mattresses across the whole living room floor and three mothers and six children held together through the storm in an eight-by-eight Area we cook soup and noodles for days on that tiny stove We thawed snow for water on the same stove and boiled our potatoes and noodles I will always held special fondness for Kent stoves It not only kept us alive. It kept us warm and it fed us Adriana celebrated her eighth birthday towards the end of the worst and we managed to drive into town to the grocery store The power was still off and the store couldn't even open its doors without electricity They pride them open and forced them to part partially separate so the islanders could buy what few things were left on the shelves There was one box of Duncan Hine's white cake mix and we took it home We opened the box and passed it among ourselves which shared utensils Spooning bites of dry cake mix while we sing happy birthday It is to this day the best birthday party I've ever been to Three women and six children survived that storm at a point on the island where the burnt hit better than 90 miles an hour winds Raging down from Alaska and below zero temperatures and we stayed warm and well fed with no help from a man Somewhere somehow in the midst of the struggle to survive a little income. I did manage to do what I went there to do I edited and produced three books based on the material I believe have come up from the great teacher and the win a Consummate accomplishment for a single mother living on 900 a month Eventually I required the rights back to the first two self published the last one and even got it on a new age Bestseller list Adriana still says this is a time period She remembers when she thinks about my power those trailer years. We found out nothing could stop us One of these books was on a subject of male tyrants Though I did not think I'd ever experienced one at the time One was on manifestation and one was on super consciousness I wish I'd known I draw into my life what I edit I would never have done that book on male tyrants, but it wears on you, you know The aloneness with so much responsibility The school was dreadfully inferior and I worried about the girl's education I could offer them nothing beyond the most basic requirements of life Though I had become a magician in the second hand store Deep in my heart. I was still lonely I began to lecture about third books specifically because it addressed a subject. I thought to be sadly in need of understanding Many people I knew held deep respect to the point of objective reverence and Subjection for whatever pred presented itself with the framework of what we consider deity Send a voice and call it god or jesus or mary or any known master and people bow in reverence But the same people who bow to what is considered deity within religion scoff at people who have communication With information source outside of our cultural historical frame of reference i.e aliens how narrow I decided it was my task to bridge this chasm between spirituality and what is considered alien consciousness and begin to speak on the subject I've never understood where fate meets karma And if we create our reality, what role does destiny play? I may never know in this lifetime I will surely never understand how the same woman who left one man Rather than allow her daughters to grow up in a loveless home could possibly get caught In what was to unfold I thought about that question too. I've been really thinking about that a lot You know because we know we have dharma. We have our fate, you know our divine purpose But we also have karma and we also have free will So I've been thinking about that a lot lately. She says where fate meets karma. Where does it? Where does free will end and dharma begin? You know what i'm saying? Like that's that's something that we as humans may never fully understand Um where free will actually takes over dharma our dharma actually takes over free will I met a man at a speaking engagement who claimed to be something he wasn't But I believed him because I wanted him to be what he said he was because I wanted the world to have such a possibility I wanted me to have such a possibility He betrayed himself as a great teacher and he played guitar and he sang songs He told me he was a native american a medicine man who studied with great old grandfathers and grandmothers He performed ceremony and played the flute and wrote songs He carried a sacred pipe and conjured images deeply helped within my psyche And so began my years with eagle the bear spider raven and for white owl and the black fish I hiked deeper into the forest and spent probably two nights of every week carrying the stones into the sweat lodge Praying and singing the first two two years we traveled with elders and I really did learn many amazing things What I didn't know was that he was learning right along with me He really had known many of these things before we came together But then I never experienced a real con man until him and it took me years to figure that out I did not know how cleverly the dark could pretend to be the light Yes, and that's true. I mean I find myself still making some of the same same mistakes Even though I thought I've healed something I can understand that and that's a great line. I did not know how cleverly the dark could pretend to be the light Slowly he began a process of tearing me down demeaning me cutting me off from old friends and taking my power Over a period of almost five years until one day. I awoke to realize I'd become an abused woman I'd allowed a man to hit me while I supported him and I apologize. They are doing construction next door They've been doing construction next door for quite a while now So if you hear banging around there's really nothing I can do about it But it literally is right outside my window. They're building they tore down a restaurant now They're building high rises so One day I was walking behind him on the way to the kitchen to make him a cup of coffee All of a sudden he trolled around and powed a blow to my left ear Pain showed so sharp at numb Numb shot through me and I felt the ground from the blow I stood the rest of the day in bed holding my ear curled in a fetal position from the pain I was deaf in that ear for six months and I told no one he never said he was sorry We just went on with life. After all he was a great teacher and I was just a woman What else am I left to think about my desperation for me to allow such treatment? Perhaps because the abuse was infrequent and came literally out of the blue. I excused it Perhaps it was perhaps I was too ashamed to admit it happened. Perhaps my childhood wound reopened I was in the fifth grade right after lunch one spring day. Charlotte the teacher's pet saw a book lying on the teacher's desk Charlotte was the room librarian And so it was her domain to check all library books found in the room. Alas, it had not been checked out at all Ever vigilant charlotte promptly returned the book to the library and came back to the classroom The bell rang and the teacher teacher walked away took a look at her desk and asked where her book was The room got really quiet. Mrs.  Brown walked across the room and stood in front of me Judy you took my book back to the library, didn't you? No man, mrs. Brown I said respectfully to which she drew her arm back and slapped me across the face propelling me out of my Desk and onto the floor. I was stunned and humiliated. I had done nothing I couldn't wait to tell ruby what had happened She would take care of it. Mothers always take care of these things when I told her what happened ruby said I'm sure she had a good reason I have to teach at the same school. There's nothing I can do I never forgot her response and lived out the repercussions for another 30 years If someone hits me, I must have done something to deserve it If I was raped at night point It must have been because I had no business walking along the road late at night Before I finally learned my lesson he attacked my daughter and wound up stealing everything We had accumulated between us. It was a very in the very end. He almost killed me Holding me against glass panel doors and beating me back and forth across the face until I almost lost consciousness The truth was finally clear to me. I had found a five-year long battle with the dark side for the soul of a man and lost We agreed to separate after the girls and I returned from studying with an herbalist Instead while we were out of town. He wrote obscenities in the bathroom walls with magic marker packed everything and left He forged my name on documents that resulted in lawsuits and cleaned out the bank account I learned the hard lessons of a male tyrant We returned home and found everything gone everything I should say of value He had taken the girls new video player bought with their child support all CDs all my art my sacred bundle all the furniture of any value All running vehicles including a motorhome in both our names all paperwork even my address book He left behind a hunt He left behind 1,500 pounds of wet installation and trash everywhere There were threats hidden inside jars and hat bands and a notice from a landlord that we had less than 30 days to be out of the house The girls and I cleaned the house sealed the walls he'd covered with obscenities repainted and moved within the deadline I know how much the installation and garbage weighed because when we shoveled it off the rental truck at the dump They charged me 180 dollars when I looked shocked at the cost. They said hey lady. You just offloaded 1,500 pounds of trash and that's what it cost without a penny to my name That was a huge sum to be charged for dumping his trash But insult to injury had become a way of life with him. He also deserted the two dogs. He had brought into my life I put everything left into storage kept out one good looking outfit and took the only living space Space offered to us a friend's tiny motor home We boarded the dogs the kennel put three cats in a cage stacked on each other and moved all of us into a space Only big enough to sleep in alongside the cat cages I borrowed money from adriana who had saved every penny she'd ever been given Perhaps just so she could loan me the money and went to town looking for a house A rental agent who had clearly lost her mind rented me an expensive old waterfront farmhouse on six acres Of the most beautiful land on the island I was a woman with no job and two teenage children to this day I have no idea how I got that farmhouse nor do I have any idea how I had the courage to rent it We moved in slowly and invited the owners to leave their old furniture to place rather than to take it to the dump There is goodness. Thankfully. This gave us beds a sofa from the 50s and a dining room table I slowly lifted my head from the paralyzing decay of shame and began to contact old friends Obtaining phone numbers one by one. I immediately discovered why he had stolen my address book He called many of them and told them I had stolen everything from him and left him with nothing He had told them I had taken all the money Even told some of them that I had abused him But here's the biggest shocker of all many of them believed him Yeah, that's called a smear smear came from campaign from a narcissist Narcissists will do that what they're doing to you They will say you are doing to them And so you become the victim the views are when you're actually the victim And they're really charming and they can charm you and trans you so that's why they're able to get away with it He had told the most amazing lies I'd ever heard.  So I justified it I kept thinking I had done something wrong to make him hit me. It came out of the blue. It was so It came so out of the blue. It was hard to believe and it even happened This was to be my first major encounter with betrayal The trail is one of the hardest Emotions to work through. I'm still working through it I'm still working through I'm probably going to be working through the emotion of betrayal for a really long time And the hard thing is like once you've been betrayed you have a really hard time trusting other people Which I'm trying not to be that way I'm trying not to allow the Especially with my absence situation the betrayal of someone I consider to friend I'm trying not to let that affect the way I see other people. Right. I don't want to be jaded I don't want to look at other people and think are you going to do the same thing to me that this person did to me Um, so that's a hard one All right, let me reread that This was my first major encounter with betrayal and I watched many people I call friends choose to believe him instead of me Until that experience with them I always believe that there were two sides to every story now. I know better By that I mean that I understand they're always two experiences and the grand meta physical understanding Everyone has their own truth But there is no mitigation for abused verbal or physical and there is no other side that excuses abuse. Absolutely. Absolutely The final shock for me was when a girlfriend visited me one day shortly after we got our new house She was one of the few people who knew about the abuse She had lived near us and had seen his hypocrisy She was also one of a handful of people who knew that I had stood by this man through his immense legal problems Paying for his lawyers with the profits from my own books to clean up his past shady history She told me about a telephone conversation. She had had with his mother during the months of legal battles He had always claimed to be a mitis a person of mixed Blood part native and part Caucasian or metis. I'm not familiar with that term So this woman had asked his mother which side of the family had the native american blood His mother had a reply that there was absolutely no native blood on any side only italian She confirmed that he was actually a full blood full blooded italian In actuality he was nothing he had claimed to be and until the very end I had believed him I believed in his version of the legal battles which portrayed him as a victim of the system I believed his version of why I found different names of paperwork I believed his version of how awful all the other women had been in his life betraying him and deserting him And leaving him with nothing and I swore I'd stand by him and show him how wonderful some women can be I believed his version of where he learned and earned his medicine And in the end I was discovered he was not native not even part native Not only was he not what he said he was but he wasn't even who he said he was either I had wondered why had he had different names from his mother and why his own daughter had a different last name And why the name I knew him by was different from either his birth name or his only daughter's name He had been many different men in his life There's a dreadful shame that comes from being the victim whether it is abuse ignorance or both As in my case it is rather like being a rape victim There's a terrible sense that you did something to bring it on some horrible awful feeling that somehow you deserved it I absolutely understand what she's saying In my case this was of course the result of my childhood with queen victoria who had somehow made me feel like I was very lucky She hadn't left me on a dung heap somewhere to start when she took me in as a baby And the ideal mating for terror is when a natural abuser meets a victim of childhood trauma In that sense we were made for each other Yeah, that's that's true And if you understand the perfection of imperfection We both got what we chose to deserve as harsh and awful as it sounds As long as we allow it we will be beaten and when we value freedom above anything and everything else We will choose freedom even when it means the loss of what appears to be everything The reason he fled when he did is because of my growing suspicions of many things I'd begin to call him on his hypocrisy more and more Loudly risking everything in doing so and I threatened to let people know who he really was and who he really wasn't Had I saved Subservient and obeying he still would be dominating my life In the midst of my escape from terror. I drew a friend's my calls A remarkable and wonderful man literally flew to me and helped me through this crisis He brought his white horse to america from abroad He told me there was nothing I could ever do that would make him leave and no matter how hard I tried to push him away He was there to stay I finally yielded to his pleadings and I let down my long hair over the castle wall He was the antithesis to every man I had ever known He was grounded both in his business life and his spiritual life and he adored me He listened intently to my feelings valued my opinions on all matters and he loved to touch and be touched He held his hand over mine one day at a cafe in santa fe took off his Favorite ring which he wore everywhere and said the next ring that will go on this finger is the ring that you put there The same day I put one on your finger. It will be the ring that binds us forever It was a moment from a movie and I melted. I would have melted too That's a good line. He did a good lie on that one Was I finally safe enough to trust again? I let my hair down further over the castle wall Slowly basking in his love and his commitment. I began to react relax He helped me unravel the messes constraining me. He defended me. I don't think anyone had ever defended me before We began a new business together. He adored the girls and for the first time in their life They had a loving generous generous father He gave jennifer money for guitar lessons something I never been able to offer her and he bought adriana her own flight headsets So she wouldn't have to borrow one when she went flying He noticed little things and acted on them. He even drove to jennifer's college to check out her potential housemate lovingly interrogating them Qualifying them to make sure she would be safe in that environment asking them all sorts of silly questions Only a loving father would ask she glowed in the attention. We all did Love and appreciation are beyond measure. There's no yardstick long enough to measure its importance No scale that one can weigh its immense value. I began to heal And so when christmas rolled around I was determined to find the most special present I could to thank him for choosing to be the amazing being he had chosen to be I wanted to give him something beyond a thing in a box something beyond measure I wanted to find something to bespeak my all and humble greatness to him And that is how I met tom And so we're going to leave it right there guys, which of course tom is the Sir twin flame. That's the man who um Channeled the first part of this book So um, I think that's a good place to leave it. I hope you guys enjoyed that I am thoroughly enjoying this book as I've said many times I've enjoyed the actual writings of tom and now judy over the channeling to be honest with you guys This is a very interesting interesting book. All right guys talk to you soon


Good morning Hank, it's Tuesday. So this is the story of how our educational media company complexly came to sponsor a world-class athlete, specifically a Tetris player in Oklahoma. Okay, so this is video of me playing Tetris, a game where the goal is to make complete lines of blocks. I've been playing this game since it came out 34 years ago for the Nintendo Entertainment System, and I'm pretty good. Like, I start at level nine speed, which you're seeing here. If you get over 100,000 points before dying, your end screen is a cool space shuttle taking off next to the Kremlin, a reference to the game's Soviet programmers, and if you get over 120,000 points, you get the best end screen of them all. The Kremlin taking off while a UFO is on the launchpad. I can usually reach the highest end screen in the game. A couple times I've even gotten over 300,000 points. This is 13-year-old Willis Gibson, also known as Blue Scooty, playing Tetris. Willis usually starts at level 18 or 19, and then keeps playing long after mere mortals like myself would die. He can even play after the so called kill screen of level 29, where the pieces start moving so fast that most of us can't even move them to the left or right. Willis uses a special controller technique called rolling to move the pieces super fast, and he is ludicrously, wondrously, stupefyingly good at Tetris. I, in 34 years, have gotten over 300,000 points, I don't know, maybe 30 times. Willis' top score is over 6 million. The defining feature of Tetris has always been that you don't beat it. Hank, you made a song about this many, many years ago called The Man Who Throws the Tetris Piece all about how you cannot beat the God behind Tetris because he will just keep throwing pieces at you faster and faster until eventually you cannot go on. Indeed, each of the billions of Tetris games played over the last three and a half decades have ended the same way. The player loses until, that is, a few weeks ago when Willis became the first person ever to play Tetris until the game crashed, freezing not at level 9 or level 29, but at level 157, at which point he had been playing Tetris at this speed for something like 35 minutes. This clip made national news. Willis became known as the person who beat Tetris, who finally defeated the man who throws the Tetris piece by causing the game's code to break in the face of his extraordinary brilliance.  And I said, yes, of course I did. In fact, I was watching live when it happened because I am a massive fan of classic Tetris. And then you said, should Complexly sponsor him? And I said, yeah. So I reached out to Willis's mom, who's a high school math teacher, and asked her what she thought of the idea. And she loved it, as did Willis, who watches some of our stuff now and again. And that is how we came to be the lead sponsors of Willis's Twitch and YouTube livestreams with Complexly's beautiful logo prominently featured. I don't want to brag, Hank, but I believe that Complexly, which makes Crash Course and SciShow and Eons and much more, is now the first ever online media company to sponsor a world-class Tetris player. Now, lest you worry that your Patreon dollars are going to support this lovely silliness, I want to be clear that Hank and I are paying for this sponsorship out of our pockets. But while Willis's live streaming does not reach billions of viewers or whatever, I do think it's kind of a good investment. The brands within Complexly, Crash Course and SciShow and Study Hall and Eons and so on are really strong, but far fewer people know about Complexly itself, the company that makes all that stuff. And we've been looking for ways to increase awareness of the overall company. We think it's important to get the word out not just about what we make, but about who we are. And we are Complexly, a production company that now employs over 70 people who work on a huge variety of educational content. So through this sponsorship, we get to do that while also encouraging and supporting an extraordinary young person. Also, Willis is kind of like a NASCAR driver when it comes to thanking his sponsors on stream, which we appreciate. No, thank you, Willis. And thank you, Hank, for the idea of sponsoring Tetris players. Sometimes your ideas, Hank, they are just ludicrous and terrible. And sometimes they are ludicrous and awesome. I will see you on Friday.


Welcome back to F&A and today is kind of an unofficial part 2 of how much effort put into your animation. I did the previous clip about that. You can check it out. But it's more about how passion can get you to the work, how you can start it, but without discipline, you're going to have a really hard time continuing through the more difficult part and aspects of animation. So today is all about passion versus discipline and animation. Now when it comes to work ethic, everybody has their own approach. Everybody has kind of their own slogan or motivational quote that they have. You can find a bunch of stuff online where people talk about that. Just recently I saw one here, it says people romanticize their plans, but dread the execution. The magic you're looking for is in the work you're avoiding. Kind of like that actually a lot. Or there's a Mike Tyson quote floating around, discipline is doing what you hate to do, but do it like you love it. Also not wrong. Sometimes you got to go through that long part of whatever workflow, whatever work that you have to finish and it's super boring, but you got to go through it and you hate that, but you still got to approach it in a way where you really love it so that your work doesn't suffer and your end result is good enough for whoever needs to see it. And Chris had a tweet here where it said, Adam tip, one thing that doesn't get much light is passion versus discipline. When the initial excitement wears off and you're lacking inspiration, you need discipline to execute and help you pull through to reach that initial goal. Absolutely true. And however you want to phrase again your motivation, the tips, the things that people say, you're going to a one point. I'm going to say it almost everybody, if not every artist, is going to face a moment where it's kind of like a writer's block. It's more like an animation block or a period where you've started to work and you were really excited about it. Everything was really cool. But now you are in the section where you just got to go through the steps, through the checklist of things or whatever you have. You might be done with your fun blocking, but now it's all about fixing things and arcs and looking at other technical aspects and going through polish and all that can be less exciting than initial blocking and creative idea finding, but you got to go through that anyway because you're not going to have fun all the time as awesome as animation is, it's still work and there will be parts that you're not going to have as much fun with then compared to like other parts at the beginning. And this is why I always say you got to love the process and I do love the process and that has helped me a lot in terms of getting through those harder moments in a more difficult and maybe less exciting moments in animation. But generally you need to be aware that inspiration, you can't wait for inspiration. Inspiration just not going to appear out of nowhere. I mean, sometimes it doesn't get depending on your other influences or observations, whatever you have, but when you have something to do, you can't just sit and wait at your desk and not animate and go, well, I'm going to wait for inspiration and then I'm going to work. You still got a deadline unless you're self-employed and you know, this is your own thing and you're not beholden to a deadline. It's just all about working for yourself. If you can do that and you can pay your bills like that, that's awesome. I love it. A lot of other people, they do work for someone or even they do work for themselves, but they do still have a deadline. They still want to deliver or have to deliver for someone. And at the end, you always kind of work for someone, even if that someone is yourself. So a deadline is always going to come into play. So even if you are not super inspired or super motivated, you still got to go through the process and deliver. So you can't wait for inspiration. Inspiration will come while you do the work. Might not be immediately, but sometimes you go through the process and you're just working and suddenly, oh, I just did this. That reminds me of this. Oh, wouldn't it be cool and bam, now you got inspiration, your new ideas and you can continue and improve on what you've been doing before. But of course, this is all really easy to say. And how do you develop discipline? I mean, this is going to be very subjective. I can't tell you how to develop discipline. I can only give you my list of things that I have gone through that I'm doing that helped me in the process. But this is all very subjective and very individual to your situation. So try out what I'm about to talk about. And maybe none of them will work for you. Maybe some of them, maybe all of them. I don't know. And maybe probably you're going to have your own ways. And please comment, let me know how you'd go about those things. What is your process of finding discipline? How did you get there? Are you struggling right now? And do you need extra help? I'm probably not going to cover everything that you need to know. So if there's something that I'm missing, let me know in the comments and you can chat about it. I'm very curious what you think. But for now, I'm going to give you my list. And everything starts for me with I need to want to do it. I know that sounds very simple and almost silly. But if I don't really want to do something, I'm not going to do it. And I might find all kinds of excuses and reasons that are not really why I'm not doing something. It really comes down to I just don't want to do it. And this is for me across all aspects of life. This could be for work, this could be health, this could be eating, this could be cleaning up my office, whatever, whatever's going on. If I don't do it, it really comes down to I just don't want to. So I really want to do it. I will find the time I will make the time when I will get to it. So for me, there is no magic tutorial. There's no list, even though I'm about to give you a list here. None of that matters to me or none of that is going to help me. If I don't really want to do it. Now, just because you say, OK, I want to do it, doesn't mean that you're going to get this going to be all super easy. But it is to me that initial spark or that initial decision where, all right, let's do this. And now, now that you want to do it and you're actually serious and honest with yourself that I'm going to do this, now you got to find a way to make it work within the limitations, your environment and just the opportunities that you have. Because again, just because you want to do something or just because you have a plan doesn't mean you're going to get there. Everything will always have to be tailored towards your surroundings and kind of how you find your way through, you know, whatever hurdles you're facing to get to that end goal. So once I want to do it, how do I go about it? So what is my list? So for me, I prepare my surroundings for success. That's kind of like a cheesy quote or something I can I can put in here as a tip. That means everything that I need to do, be it with my office or let's say if I go exercise or anything is ready and prepared to make that happen. So let's say YouTube, right? I have everything set up, my mics and the lights. I don't want to set up like a lighting set up or my notes or anything in the background like I like a certain look to all this. As you can tell, it's always kind of I found my look and for the longest time, my YouTube clips look the same. But the thing is I get there, I have my lights here and you can see that this is all like a different color of lights, different temperature of light. So I turn everything on here. And once all that is ready, you got the light up here on the fan. But that's also kind of a warmer light. What I do then on my phone, I have an action that says lectures. Now it turns all my lights into a bluer color. So it has a different contrasting background versus by the warm front of my face. Unless I'm super pale, which I use the amp and that is kind of I just have to push a button. Everything's ready. That to me is when I do my YouTube clips. I don't want to go through a long set up where things kind of break down. And then if I'm somewhat lazy, I don't really want to do it. I feel like this is too much work. I'm just not going to do this. So I'm going to minimize those hurdles. Like I'd say if I go exercise, let's say I want exercise in the morning, I'm going to prepare my clothes and everything that I need to have heart rate monitor, whatever it is and put it where it's ready and easy to grab. See, on my couch, usually back there on my couch, I have a bunch of clothes on there. So when I get up in the morning or when I need to do something, I can just go here, everything is ready. Let's go and exercise. Was it kind of a pain to exercise? I'm also very lazy. So if I have to go through extra hurdles of, OK, where's Danny this? Oh, this equipment is not there. This is not ready. Oh, batteries are not charged for whatever things that I need. That's always an extra hurdle that will tempt me not to do it. And for me, this is really helpful because at the very beginning, when I haven't done something for a while and I decide, let's go, let's do this again. I'm very tempted and it's just because you're so used to your old ways of not doing something. And now you're deciding, all right, I'm going to do this. Every time something comes up as a little hurdle, it's a distraction. It's just another temptation. You're like, I'm just not going to do it. So I'm more likely to quit. So I want to set up my surroundings, like I said, but prepare for success in a way. And then after a while, once you get into the habit of the discipline, you can bypass those hurdles just because something is not set up. You go like, you know what, I've been doing this for so long, it doesn't matter. Let me just do this and find something else that works. You will get over those temptations and the little smaller hurdles. But at the very beginning, at least for me, they're always very tempting to stop. So I try to set up everything around myself in terms of work. And anything else that I do that minimizes those hurdles. And then because of that, it gets to my second point is consistency. Because everything is set up, everything is ready. And I just go through the motion. It forms a habit. It's like when people ask me what my schedule is and I get up really early in the morning, quarter to five, face is exposed. How can you get up so early? It's a massive pain when you are used to going to bed at midnight or one and suddenly get to get up at five or four or six or whatever. That's a big change. So you start slowly, right? You just go and go crazy from one in the morning to suddenly five because I do want my sleep. I need my six or eight hours of sleep. So I adjust and go slowly backwards in terms of I'm going to go to bed earlier and earlier so I can get up earlier, earlier in the morning. And for me, I get up early in the morning because there are no distractions. You know, messages are not showing up. It's quiet. I can record without, you know, stuff going on in the neighborhood. And I have found that from my rhythm, I need to get up early because the moment I'm done with work at the end of the day, again, temptation, I get tired. I just want to relax, spend time with my family, watch a movie, do something else. And then I'm really less likely to do something. So I have fun for myself. I'm much better off if I do my work in the morning. So again, consistency, a routine. The more you do something, the more you get used to things. The easier it is to continue and to follow through with that. That being said, you have to reevaluate and improve on your methods. Just because you have decided to do something and you set up your surroundings to be, you know, hopefully successful, doesn't mean you are going to be. You're going to fail. You're going to have some missteps. Stuff is not going to work. But again, you should try to not be discouraged and then to stop, but reevaluate. You go through the process and realize that's actually not working. I prefer to do this.  And all that will get streamlined. It's a really nice routine that's going to hopefully work for yourself. So be okay with it not working for the first time. You're going to fail, but it's okay. Allow that for yourself, reevaluate, reassess what's working, what's not working, and then improve on that and then continue. Now, if you have a bigger project, even, you know, a good habit of discipline, a bigger project is still going to challenge that because you might get overwhelmed. There's just too much to do. The deadline is so far off and you realize there's just all this, this, there's so much to do until I get there. So what helps me is to break up a bigger task into smaller tasks. So you can finish one up to the next one. Finish number two. And every time you finish a task, at least for myself, I feel reassurance. I feel confidence. I feel like, oh, that worked. Okay, I can do this again. And then after a while, as you get better, you don't have to break up a bigger task into 10 smaller ones. Maybe it's just five, but at the end, only three. And when it's something really important, you got to power through it, maybe you're going to take on that massive task as one big thing, but you are equipped with the routine, the consistency, the habit, all of that into discipline to actually go through one big task. And for animation, if you have a bigger piece you want to do, maybe creating a good blocking pass, that's your smaller task. And then you build on top of that. So each successful task is going to build on top of the previous one. And you're going to power through a bigger piece of animation, could it be lip-sync or body mechanics or whatever it is. So find ways to divide the bigger project or task, whatever you want to call it, into smaller pieces. And I can guarantee you that's going to help. You will feel better. You have accomplishments. You just have more confidence because you know you've got this done. Now you can attack something else. Now what helps for me as another extra tip, again, subjectively, is I listen to music and movies and TV shows. But sometimes you go through something and it was cool. It was creative and you are excited and you got the passion behind it and everything. And now you're going through a period where you go, yeah, this is going to be boring, but I got to do it. This could be for evening. Maybe you're super bored in terms of checking arcs and pops and spacing. You're done with your animation, but now it's kind of that checklist of, I got to make it look clean and polished and I hate that process. I mean, I don't, I love it, but maybe you do. But there's always going to be something that's less exciting than something else. I listen to things. So I might go, today I have my playlist open for Star Trek, The Next Generation. I'm going to listen to those episodes because they're very comforting. I love the sounds. I love the music. I love the voices. I like the stories. And it's more about, oh, cool. I'm excited to sit down and listen to all this while I do this. That's really boring. And it's usually stuff that I know already. I'm not going to put on a movie or a TV show that I don't know. It was maybe distracted, right? This goes back into don't set up environment for distractions. So if I work and I go, oh, that's a cool movie. I haven't seen this before. Then I end up watching it and I haven't anything, you know, there's nothing done in terms of work. So it is stuff that I know, music, movies, anything. It's nothing that's distracting. It's just something that's comforting. It kind of gets me through today. That being said, if that doesn't work, take breaks again. You, you're not a machine. You can set up all those things. You can do all those things that I said. But even for myself, I need to take breaks.  And then listen to that.  I don't know, whatever your surroundings, whatever you're going to do, but taking breaks is really important. I'm a massive, massive proponent of work-life balance.  That to me is all part of discipline because I am disciplined enough to stop and then recharge and then continue. Because all of that is when you recharge, then you might recharge too much and then you're going to be distracted and not continue. That's again where routine consistency and at the end, discipline kicks in where you can say, all right, I'm done with this. This was a nice break. Let's continue. And as you go through all of that, another tip will be listen to accomplishments. Be proud of yourself. It's okay to humble brag to yourselves and you want, I did this and it was cool. I made it work. Why not? You got to make sure that you don't beat yourself down. Like, I can't do this and yes, maybe I'm disciplined, but this wasn't that good. Nothing's ever going to be great. But you need to make sure to really look at what is great. Either that's something you have observed or positive feedback you get from other people. Listen to that. Take that, examine it and go, I did this. Actually, this was really cool. Again, all of this is going to help you with powering through moments of self-doubt or harsher critiques or feedback from someone that some of you didn't expect. But you know that at the end, I power through something similar and I got good feedback. I know I can do this. Maybe this right now is not the best thing I've done, but I have enough tools around myself or help from other people. I know that I can do this. I know I can finish this. So just don't get hung up on negative feedback and make extra sure that you do listen to positive feedback. You can be part of yourself. Take those accomplishments. It will build confidence and it will help you go through, as I said before, more difficult aspects of your work. And overall, try to find a way to love the process. I think it's if you always know that I like the beginning, but I don't like this and then I like this again, you're always going to dread that one moment. So if there's any way of loving each aspect of the process, that's also going to help you. But it's also really easy for me to say, love everything because it's you won't, but maybe you will find ways to just like it a bit more than you like it now. Me personally, at this point, I just like it all. And I know that there will be challenges. It's not like I'm super excited when I have to do a shot 50 times over. But now at this point, to me, it's like, okay, I'm going to do 50 versions of this. But that means that I'm going to be really good at what I'm doing right now. Because if I do something only once, it might be okay. To do it twice, it'll be better. Do it 50 times. Yeah, I'm going to be good at this. And that's going to help me do it again better and faster. So to me, I tried to find ways of, if you think this is negative, this is probably something positive in that moment. You might not see it now, and you might only recognize that later. But there's a good chance that whatever hardship you're going through right now is actually going to prepare you for something else. It's actually going to be something positive, but you can't see it right now. And that's my list. And that doesn't mean that it's your list. It's just something that I do. And maybe you can pick and choose. Maybe you have already thought about all of that and you have found other ways out of that to make it even better. I would love to read your comments. I would love to know how you went about it and what works for you. Because again, this is all very subjective, very individual to your surroundings, your needs, your opportunities, and your workflow and your age. And so many ways that this list will be totally different for you. And I'm actually really curious what your list is and how you go and how you power through, you know, like moments where you just, I need discipline because I don't like this, but I got to power through that. That being said, if that was actually helpful, and you know where I'm ahead of with this, if that was helpful and you want me to kind of use that list, then my workflow to help with your workflow and you want to join my workshop, I can help you, I can critique your shots, I can help you with, you know, bunch of questions that you might have with workflow questions or just tutoring in whatever way. I have workshops, you know the pitch, link in the description with all the information you can sign up at any time. And speaking of time, if you're still listening to all of this or if you're still watching all of this, thank you so much, I appreciate your time. And if you don't want to miss future uploads, feel free to subscribe and hit that bell button so you won't miss any of those fantastic uploads or not, I don't know. But maybe you'll like it, like and subscribe, you know this pitch, it's the YouTube pitch at the end. But that's it, I want to stop rambling. Thank you for watching and I will see you in my next upload.


This is currently based on ITF technology, which is kind of legacy, which is kind of doing what it's supposed to do, but it's really quite future-proof. There's no standard, there's some ad hoc implementation of that, and a number of other clones of that implementation. But it would be really nice to have what's currently working with ITF to have that on ODEF, and even better to have that working on ODEF in a standardized way. There's a bit more background about CID, since we're kind of new here, so most of them probably hear about us first time, or if you were in a second time. It's a medium-sized company, as I say, it's about five years old, about 160 employees on multiple sites. Munich, Germany, and Hamburg, and Germany, and also Minsk and Estonia. Customers, mostly in Europe and also in the Middle East, for example, quite a number, about 165 customers from one group. Small products, those guys that produce billions of documents, stuff like PDF filters, electronic invoicing systems, etc. And about 2 million licenses sold worldwide, mostly so that the strongest presence is really in the financial issues, banking sector. So, when you look at what's happening for those more complex document production or synthesization systems, what do you need? So, well, usually you have some sort of letterhead that you want to modernize, that you want to, like, work with CI, you know, like this, you understand the main match thing, but you want to, probably, you want more complex, with more variables, more variation, more complex layouts. And you want to individualize that, so depending on the customer, I know you'll get some more colors and more text, or you want to add customer address, stuff like that. You also want to separate out, it's very much what those people do is very much like software engineering.  You also want to implement complex logic, so you want to, while you are processing this document and generating five million copies for your annual invoices or your annual statements, you want to customize that.  In this example, I don't know if this is visible, there's a wheelchair and this kind of crutch thing on one branch, and there's a balloon and a microphone on the other side. So depending on the customer, depending on the history of the customer, you want to do different things. You don't want to manually, it should be, you want to do a lot of programmatically and it should work like that henceforth. What is the function which is fulfilled by either a balloon or a microphone? The function? Yeah, so there's option B, and option B gives you either a balloon or a microphone. What's the option? Why would I want either of those? The balloon is like the toddler, you get the balloon and the microphone is like 15 years old. So you really want to tailor the document to the customer or to the recipient or to whatever other complex scenario that you might find. Whatever local rules, regulations that you have to fulfill. I don't know if this statement has to be on page one and this federal statement on page two of that or something like that. So depending on the input from the database, it wants to programmatically to the stock, so it's text programming to some extent. Yeah, and so of course where this all comes from, usually especially in the large scale, it comes from the database. So you want to generate content from the database. And while you say don't bore me, this is possible, yes it is. But for more complex scenarios, for example, if you want to generate tables, you can't do that because you can't generate higher level audio structures. Or if you want to, for complex reports, you want to generate lists of lists, depending on how much. So if there's, just imagine some co-operative that wants to have a mortgage. So suddenly you have not just one address and one name, but you have a list of that and different degrees and sometimes different legal systems. So you want to really generate or synthesize complex document content out of simple database input. Yeah, so this is what you want to do and this is what actually works in RTF, which is a system product. And the question now, what exactly is missing from RTF, and for that I'd like to, and I want to buzz leave. Okay, regarding RTF. This is easy, but we are missing almost everything of lists of reports. We are unable to use complex constructions to separate the blade with many smaller building blocks and to reuse them or modify. We are missing the ability to have complex conditions, for example, depending on... Maybe you can use the microphone. Not sure if it's loud enough in the back. Okay. We are missing the complex conditions in RTF. We want to compare, overfly some database with some other variables and depending on this, we want to customize our templates, our reports we generate. So we also, in case of quality, missing feature of usage complex formatting inside of the fields. For example, that conditional field we have, we have put only a text, a plain text inside. But how about complex formatting or even putting a table inside? That's still missing. And generation of complex objects like, say, torsion, tables, list of lists, and so on and so on. The classical examples can be here, for example, any report for bank list of transactions. We have one user and list of operations made. It is a long table, but hard to generate with existing ODT. What actually we implemented till this moment in our project called GS Merge? We decided not to invent heap of new fields like we had experienced with RTF, when we are missing something, we create a new field. Instead of this, we just decided to create just a couple of fields, not create, but user fields in the ODT. It is marking over block start and mark over block end. This is just a poorly praised market, and in between of them, there will be a field content. Visual appearance displayed below and more close to what can be placed in between these poorly marked brackets. One thing is that this stuff actually works in LibreOffice. You can do this text programming today in LibreOffice. Of course, it is kind of ad hoc, so it puts some semantics into actual documents, like free-form document content. So it is not very regular, but it actually works, which is cool. Actually, it is expected to show with Libre how it works, how it is intercepted, how these fields are processed. We have a technical problem here. It does not have GS mesh, and my laptop does not have HDMI. If somebody is interested in LibreOffice, you can ask me today or tomorrow, I can display how this stuff is really working. So, back to just slides here. Inside this field construction, we can place two different types of content. First of all, the starting with cache sign, followed by a script. In this place, we have a user can place a German script, processed by our products. Yes, we are more close to implementation of that crazy idea, the German script inside ODT. Or it was about HTML, but probably very close. And another variant, it is about content fields, which can be something not evaluated as a script, but placed somewhere in the output document. And to allow cache signs inside all our content fields, there is a special variant with a tick in front of it. And we define several primitive JavaScript functions from our backend. It is just a simple function text, which is just writing a text in blood function to include our file. And several specific functions for getting certain properties past the program. And a heap of iterations on database. Move to the next record, select record, reset our database point and so on. So, this is actually, will be enough to process any complex document, to implement any complex logic inside of templates. Because we do not need no longer implement like we have in RTF before. Complex if conditions, we do not need to implement wild loops. We do not need to create any of our custom formatting functions. Our customers can do it by themselves, just using poor JavaScript. Actually, for processing JavaScript is used Google V8 engine. It is for security reasons running as a sandbox. So, no direct file operations, no any general IO, no internet access, only just some JavaScript engine. Here must be a demo. And actually, what benefits we do receive with this idea? Actually, these topics are not very abstract, but mostly comparing to our previous approach with RTF, when we were using standard RTF fields. And we are trying to extend this list of fields with any new instructions. At first, we have more flexible support of documents. Theoretically, we are not limited just to JavaScript. Inside of the script field, it is easy to put any other script in a language. On the concept level, we were thinking about choosing between JavaScript and Google. But there is no critical reasons why to limit it to both of them. In any language, we just need to implement some basic functions and that's all. In this case, we are not limited just to classical weight we used in RTF, just putting fields inside fields to have a good result. And we can use in classes here any paper, dime or whatsoever. Because inside of this RTF template is running absolutely little general script. So the customers are feel free to use any type of ideas, how to proceed with the place, how to combine logic and representation. Probably some sub functions, probably in classes, in both cell. This way is very simple comparing to classical RTF. We use before because after some iterations of extending RTF fields, it is very hard to read what actually happens. It is hard to understand what actually doing this template. And it is became a kind of very specific and very limited language, which requires very specific knowledge to program it. This is not true if we just put snippets of common, well known to your customers' language. And of course we think that this approach can be very universal. Because theoretically this can be extended to use not just in auditory part, but even backported to RTF. Because we do not define exactly fields by themselves. We are not so syntactically, symmetrically specific. But we just define very basic two brackets. Opening the bullet bracket as a field and closing the bullet bracket. About the future of this person. So the proposal before, that is actually a working product. The nice feature is, as I said, it does not need any extensions to ODF. The drawback is that it is not actually ODF. It is a markup as if you would be going into a text document and marking something in red and then externally defining this red means something special. It would be better and more interoperable if there would be a way to express that in ODF, which there currently isn't. So one, this is just a rough idea. This is just a sketch of an idea that is not so different from a proposal that has been made a number of years ago about extending fields in the ODF to see, but maybe it's time now to pick up bits and pieces from that. So what this does, it's depth defining this bracket. So you have this beginning and end. Conceivably that will also be able to skip or to not be within the same level of the accidental hierarchy. But to have something that begins somewhere nested here and ends somewhere nested there. For example, if you want to include or exclude a large part of it actually. So if there would be an XML element of beginning and end, you wouldn't be able to skip in and out of the XML tree. So secondly, there's this field type, which gives a little bit more type safety to what's actually inside there, how to interpret that. Before the example had this markup with this hash mark and this escape hash mark. So that would be script content complex, for example. And then random content to be defined, like paragraph content. So one will probably set the limit somewhere there depending on the type, but probably in page-based markup one would include pages there as well. And for text markup, probably paragraph content is sufficient. From what I can tell. Yeah, well actually probably one would also be able to define styles. So that should be a bit more generic. Additionally, I guess it will pay to say that at least a number of statements in the script content like include, like text would be there. I would probably not mandate any language, at least if I open. But that's always, I mean this is not how the TC works. How the TC works is you have an idea, you make a proposal and then it gets made out over a certain time and then something, usually something better or at least something else comes out of it. Okay, so this is largely it. What do you think? I see a potential danger because this looks somehow like a rebuild of PHP, not on top of HTML, but on ODF, ODT actually. Yeah, that's actually quite to the point. And when you see the, and when you see what the people do there with this tax programming, it's rather similar. Yes, but so we have this unfortunate tradition in the office area that we have always this intermingling of application, logic, and data presentation. And I think we should continue in that direction. We have to find ways to declare it and then separate those issues. So for example here, let's call it processing. There's also something like selling database or something like that and also get data or get data entry. In my opinion, we should find ways to express it in a more declarative way. For example, in a separate file, maybe as part of the document, but not as part of the content, XML, have some algebraic expression which actually defines our data set, our period, maybe a hierarchical or relational. So what I hear is something like XSLT, so you can address statements and you can say what to do with that statement once you have selected that. And in your content XMLF marker, for example, this is the block to be used for that query and this is the block. The problem with that X query and XSLT is really not for the faint of heart to do. And what's happening here, ideally that's something that the, I mean for the simple cases that should be something that the secretary can do. But the fear is for the simple case, I think it's very fine. But then people are coming who are driving that simple, and it's the mechanisms to be intended to be used for simple things that drive me to the other most corners. Okay, I have one fundamental problem with that. And this is, I know I'm a computer scientist myself. And I also always try to make the world a better place. The problem is, it tends not to work out. So I don't know, I'm not doing this AI because they might build the robots that will take over the world. But it doesn't help because there's just one, it just needs one guy who's doing that and he did that. And so it always tends to fail. And if you look at PHP, I find PHP a wonderful example because PHP is immensely successful. If you look what people make out of PHP, it's awesome. And 80% of the internet of the sites run some PHP somewhere. And why not have that much of the world population do something wonderful with OOGF? Even if it's not fulfilling the high lesson of the computer scientist approach. It's not that people didn't try that. It's just separating that out at the very least that needs really, really excellent IDE support for you to integrate those two dissort parts. I find that rather imaginative. And this is the end of my buzzwords. It doesn't mean that it's not that you can only do one of the two. I mean you can do both. Josh, you had another question? Yes, I didn't put my finger up yet, but I have questions. Yeah, I think you were almost... Almost, yeah. Can you give me an example where you would need to have a field begin and field end instead of simply a surrounding element? Actually, Vasily asked me the same question yesterday and I was coming up with an example. So you had 24 hours already to think about this. He said, that's not very practical. Well, I think it is and we just have to let that... Let's go into that offline. It's possible that I'm not... Since I'm... I mean, Vasily has actually had to think and work with it and programme it and the demos and whatever. And so I'm terribly sorry but I'd love to show you a live demo of that. But unfortunately, there's some... Actual standards of the plugs. But yeah, let's go ahead and do that offline or in the TC even. So I think it's useful. I think it's... We might have several matching... We do some free includes and what comes out of that is valid XML. Well, if the begin and the end are on different levels of the XML, then what comes out of that query or out of that function should also be just an XML fragment and not actually a valid node set. But it should be text which should then be combined with the existing document and then be parsed. So that's quite complex to do. So you need to have a convincing argument why you want it. Okay, I take the sound. Okay. But that's a minor detail. I mean, if it's pointless, then it's pointless. It doesn't really invalidate the proposal and its entirety, I think. No, it's just one aspect. I mean, you could possibly then choose a different markup. So you could, well, perhaps have that as a real element, like really a nested element. I think it's more generic like that. And if it doesn't do any harm to be more generic, so if there's no cost to be more generic, then it's been more generic. If you tell me that it can't possibly work if it's re-pausing, for example, which is a good argument, I don't think that would work. Yeah. And I have a comment with regards to doing the standardization process. Since ODF 1.2, you can have any ODF 1.2 documents or ODF 1.2 extended options. So you can, right now, already pick a namespace and write all of this in that namespace. The problem is that you'll also then need to change all the editing applications you want to work with. Or write a plugin. Yes. Write three plugins, or four. So for this standard product, it was considered better to not do that. And the background, there was quite some how to put that, some confusion in the market. And if you don't really, you don't have the crystal ball to the future. And for that, you better play it safe and pick something that you can edit in every ODF processing application that's out there that supports fields. And you're done with it. And the mapping is trivial. I mean, programmatically, mapping one to the other, that's one to one mapping. You can always, if you use later things clear up, you can always change forces about losing anything. But I agree. Bring that into the TC, perhaps, that's what we're extending. Getting something to the TC can take a long time, right? So it might be a good idea, just like with the open formula. We started out with formulas in a specific namespace. It matured there in a number of implementations. And then it was adopted. And it was moved into the area. So it's probably best to just initially give that some vetting.  If you can poke holes into that in five minutes, like you did with this nest thing, that's valuable as well. So then you can just set yourself up in a hassle, implement that, demo that, and then go back to the gloryboard. And then you do that and go from there, and then that gets the lesson. So there we are. Looked like six minutes all the time. Any further questions, comments, ideas? I don't know. Want to throw something at us? Great. Nothing. Cool. Thanks a lot for your attention. It's been great. See you around.


The question was asked that begins as follows. We make the change at the level of thought. Like in the review, it says, my mind holds only what I think with God. Okay, I like that, that it holds that. But at the same time, I have some other thoughts. You know, like something at work, or like you said, seeing a guy cover a little seal. Now, when I have that thought, do I bless it right then and there? Or what do I do? How does that work? You know, I mean, like I'm about to stop right there when I realize I made a judgment. I'll stop right there and say, bless this, forgive me or something. Or I'll just say, that's meaningless, let it go. It's just to see the false is false. In other words, the first aid that you made, my mind holds only what I think with God. That's just like I am as God created me. That's the ultimate release. But that's not where you start with, because it's like all these attacks and all these judgments out there in mind. It would be denial, so to speak, to say, I didn't think that was possible. That's where denial and oppression comes in, because the mind literally tries to, doesn't want to look at those, because it believes in the truth. So it stuffs them out of awareness. What the Course is saying is like, when the thoughts come, when you see the judgment trains and you hop on everything, it's just to notice the thought. And the more you study this thought system, the more we will be able to recognize those judgment thoughts and backward thoughts. At first, it's terrifying, because the mind still believes that they're real. That they're true. And so that's where the guilt comes in. And then ultimately the release from the guilt will come eventually to see that that's not me. That that's not me. Remember, we're trying to detach from the thoughts. So, as invested as we are in bodies and houses and worlds and clothes and everything, just imagine how invested the mind is to its thoughts, because it believes it's got this private world of thoughts in there. You know, like, I just think so and so can't read my mind tonight or just for that, because of what I'm thinking. The underlying belief of the ego is it's like, I'm a separate person, and at least I've got a pretty calm appearance out here, and oh gosh, it's these people who only knew all the reactions of the wrong idea. They really see me through who I am. The underlying belief behind that is the belief that I have a private mind. You see? The private mind is separate from the boundaries of thinking. And that's the belief too. So, that's a deep one to start with. And that's why it seems like when you first start working with a course and all this stuff starts coming up, the guilt comes from look at these thoughts, and they're me. You know, these are really me. The mind does not detach from the thoughts at the beginning. It really believes that those are really my real thoughts. And if the only people only knew what was going on, she just slowly starts to say they're backwards. They're the imposter. Early on it says also that darkness can't hide, and even if it, you know, you wouldn't even want it to. It's no point.