Welcome! What a great room full. Please to see you all here as Makers in the Hall. We're here at the main charitable mechanic association, one of the neatest buildings in Portland, built in 1857 and in the process as you can see of really good education. The Makers in the Hall series you probably already know since you found it and are here the last Wednesday of every month. Highlighting Makers doing interesting things in Maine. A chance for us to get together, hear what folk are doing, talk to them a little bit afterwards. So yeah, we, at its founding, the man charitable mechanic association was a an organization of Makers for Makers. People who made barrels and buggy whips and houses and boats. You name it, they were here and we are now an organization again of Makers after a sort of dip. But here we are and so there is information on membership in the back there. If you make anything come join us. Yeah, happy to have you. The deal, so I'll be done very shortly. We're gonna turn it over. We're so thrilled to have Brent and Carpenter and X Makers here. Mark and Gabriel and Steve, thank you for wearing shirts with your name. So helpful. My understanding is Mark, you're gonna kind of take it away. We'll share it around a little bit with colleagues. There will be time at the end for some questions and answers. There are some refreshments. So time to linger and chat afterwards. We brought beer if anybody wants one. Yeah, there's beer, there's fun, there's cheese. So, Mark, thank you. Okay, well thank you. We're really happy to be here and we appreciate where everything the mechanics hall has been doing here in the city over the last 150 years and glad to be a part of that. So what we want to talk to you tonight about is a little bit about what we're doing.  We formed in 2015. So just two years ago, we're brand new. And our idea was we wanted to bring back ax making domain. And we wanted to also educate people on the use and care of axes and also curate the history of, it's a real rich history of ax making in Maine here, as you can imagine. There's three people in our company, three principles in the company, myself, my brother Steve, Barry Worthing, who will be coming in from his other job racing in here probably in about 15 minutes, and Gabriel McNeil here, who's our blacksmith machinist and all around kind of sensei about what we're doing here. We work, we're over in South Portland, we work out about a 1500 square foot shop. We sell axes and restored axes and accessories and some apparel like these shirts. Anything to do with axes in Maine, we sell out of our shop, we sell out of places, different museums around, the logging museum in Bradley, logging museum in Patton. We've got some stuff in the Portland Trading Company, we've got stuff at Shelter Tool, and then we sell online too. One of the other things we do, which we just did one today, which was great, is we restore people's axes. So we have people bringing axes and say, hey, this is my grandpa's axe. It's been in our family for 100 years. Can you put a new handle on it? Can you fix it up? And we do that. Today's was, the guy found one in a river when he was fishing with his uncle, and he brought it to us. It was destroyed. I mean, it was pitted, it was horrible, but it was important to him because he was with his family when he found it. So we fixed it up, handled it, and he was happy as punch it about what? One o'clock today when he gave it to him. So that's an other thing we do. One of the main questions we get when we ask, people say, what do you guys do? And we say, well, we make axes. And they say, what did they say, Steve? You mean the chopping kind? And we're always saying, what other kind is that? It's a splitting kind. But they ask us, why did you guys get into axes? In April, we ran a crowd funding campaign to raise some money to buy some of this forging equipment. And so we had to make a short little video that basically said, really answer the question, why do you guys want to make axes?  We start by removing the old handle, and then each axis weighed, measured, and cataloged. The next step is sandblasting. Then we re-profile and sharpen the head and use a diamond hone to make it razor sharp. We test the hardness of the bit so that we know it'll keep an edge. Once the head is restored, we give it a new handle. We also add a custom leather sheath at the time of shipping. At this point, we've got everything we need to do the restoration of old axes. What we don't have are the tools to make our own axes. These tools are gas forges to heat the steel, a hydraulic press and power hammer to shape the steel, and the necessary related tooling to finish the axe. We're working with local blacksmiths and machinists to develop a process to create an axe worthy of the main axes that once dominated the market. Help us bring axe-making back to main so you can tell your story. Okay, so you guys can all pass your money up to the front now. Anyways, that showed you a little bit. We just want to show that video really to show the inside of our shop, kind of what we're doing. We'll talk a little bit more about the restoration process later on. So what kind of our mantra at Brant and Cochrane is make, educate, and curate. So making axes, restoring axes, educating people about their care and use, and then curating the history of axe-making in main. That's kind of what we're doing. We're going to go about this talk tonight in the exact opposite order of that, because I figured it'll be more confusing. So that's what we're going to do. So my job at Brant and Cochrane is kind of history nerd. So I'm going to take the history of axe-making and touch on that a little bit tonight. The history is incredibly rich.   So the neat thing about main is there's lots of axe-makers here. I mean at one point there's probably 200 of them working at any one time. These could be big integrated shops. It's started and they put the handles on and they made them up in Oakland or places like that to just local blacksmiths. And Art's done a great job. He's put together this book that he's been curating for a long time now with the help from one of his friends. And it's just this list of all these people that made it. I mean there's tons of them. So obviously making axes in main was a big deal. And it was a big deal. The reason it was a big deal here, I'll let you in on a secret why there was a lot of axe-makers in main. There were tons of trees here and you got to cut them down, right? So that's why there were all these axe-makers here. The axe-makers were here because there was logging here. The logging went to the shipbuilding industry, lumber industry, paper-making industry. So that's one of the reasons that obviously there were a lot of axe-makers here. The thing that kind of fascinated us when we started getting into this was as an example of an area where there's a huge cluster of these axe-makers was up in Oakland, up by Waterville. And I'll pass this, and we take this to shows. I'll just pass this around. But in Waterville there were probably a dozen axe-makers working at one time on about a mile and a half of stream, staring at each other across the stream. They're right next door at each other. There were lots of them. What it was was that the stream itself, you've got a mile and a half from the pond to the falls here, and the falls down here, that's where central main power starts. That's where really the most of the fall is. There's a 90-foot falls there if anyone's been there. The rest of the other 20 feet is just kind of running. But between the falls, the railroad coming into town in the 1850s, and then a few edge tool makers show up in the 1850s. And it just kind of snowballs from there. This guy's brother-in-law and this guy's friend. This guy quits one business, goes to another one, and they start all these edge tool businesses all along this stream in Oakland. And you've got makers like Spiller, Dunedge Tool, King, Emerson Stevens, a lot of these makers that now if you go out and you're looking for a vintage axe or an antique axe, they're the ones that people are going to pay you money for. Or you're going to pay a lot of money for. And the thing about this, this is really not a boutique business. They're cranking this stuff out. So one factory in 1891, Dunedge Tool's cranking out 60,000, 70,000 axes a year. Emerson Stevens cranking out 40,000 a year. And those are two of about eight factories or six factories are going at that time. The population of Maine then is 600,000 or something. And you're probably cranking out 200,000 axes a year. So it's pretty amazing. And that's just in this one town. So as an example of one of these companies, we'll talk a little bit about Emerson and Stevens. And the way these, it's interesting, the way these companies collaborate, they're competitive, but they also collaborate. Emerson and Stevens, all of their company records are up at the University of Maine and the library up there. There are 88 bankers boxes full of stuff that none of its catalog. It's just literally thrown into a box. And I went up there last summer and said, just give me 12 boxes. And some were from the 1870s, some were from the 1940s. There were ledgers in it where you open the thing up and it crumbles in your hands and none of its really curated or taken care of. But it's amazing going through that stuff. So a couple of interesting things just to touch on. One was the way that the, these axe companies collaborated together. So in one way they did that was they shared employees. So if someone needed a temper, the temper was out sick, they'd get the temper from the other company to come over. If they wanted to buy steel, they would buy steel together, they'd buy entire carloads of steel, like from Youngstown Sheet and Tube. They would take that steel and they would split it up and they'd say, okay, here's your third of the car, here's your third, we'll pay for it, pay us back. So I'll pass these around because there's, those are kind of interesting. Those are I think from the 1940s. The other thing they did is transferred inventory back and forth. So one of the things we found when we were going through all their records is that there's invoices from these companies back and forth saying, hey, we need to buy, there's like 2,000 axe heads from you. And they would transfer these back and forth between each other when someone didn't have the inventory to get product out. The kind of craziest thing we found up there was in the 1879, all the axe companies got together and got involved in a price fixing scheme. And here's like all the doctors where they actually signed their names to the thing, okay? So they all agree, they get together January 1886 and it's all the companies in Oakland. It includes Collins, which was Collins Edge Tool, down in Collinsville, Connecticut was probably the largest Edge Tool company, maybe in the world at that point. They signed off on it. I mean, there's people from New York, everybody. So six bucks a dozen, that was the deal. So it's kind of crazy to see in that stuff. So the main point is that really Oakland and Maine was kind of the epicenter of axe making in the country. The only other place in the country that had this concentration of Edge Tool making was probably Collinsville, Connecticut. So it's an entire town that was one company. They made machetes, they made everything down there. But in any event, this is a very important place. Now, by the 1960s, all the axe making in Maine is starting to wind down for a lot of different reasons. We're lucky that in 1965, or was it 1964, this guy Peter Vogt made a film. And some of you guys may have seen this. I don't know if you've seen this online or not. But he made, he was a student at Colby College in the, he started in 1960. His freshman roommate is a member of the Woodsman's team at Colby. So he's got to get a new axe. He goes over to across the river, goes over to Oakland, goes into this factory, and Peter is just blown away by what he sees. You know, watching this old process going on. Graduates from Colby in 1963 or 1964, goes into the Air Force. He's in the film, the film corps of the Air Force. The film corps says, hey, we got all this almost expired Kodak film. Why don't you go practice and make a movie?  I'm going to go use this almost expired film and make a movie. So he makes this film. It's 10 minutes long, but it is awesome. It shows you how axes were made, what these old factories look like inside. It's really cool. So we're going to play this. There was a time when Oakland, Maine was a center of thriving industry.  Its industry produced a variety of hardware and gained, perhaps, its greatest fame in the manufacture of axes. It was a craftsman-centered industry, and near the turn of the century, almost a dozen shops were manufacturing axes along the banks of Mesolonsky Stream. Today, only one shop has survived the ravages of mass production and foreign importation. The Emerson Stevens shop still stands and still, but just barely, produces its line of fine, handmade axes. Each axe starts as a sheared-off hunk of bar steel and will eventually end up a three pound axe. Earl Wood's been starting this process most of his working life, and he's 52. Elwood Manson at 47 is considered a youngster, but he's the master craftsman. Neither has an apprentice. In an oil-fired furnace, each bar or pattern reaches intense red heat, and the first step in forming a pole or head of the axe is begun. The ends of the pattern are plated or flattened under the uncompromising steel faces of the trip hammer. The pounding head is strapped by heavy steel bands to a huge beam of solid rock maple, which rises and falls by cam action. On the anvil, the pattern is doubled over to form the eye of the axe. Finally, the two ends are then welded together, using granulated borax as the flux. The basic pole is now ready for a blade. Welding a cutting edge of high carbon steel to the softer pole of the axe is the second step Manson must perform and is the first crucial step in the formation of a fine blade. A piece of high carbon steel is lightly attached coal and placed in the blast furnace. After intense firing, it is withdrawn, hammered at the anvil, and finally integrated as a blade with the pole of the axe. For this demanding and dangerous work, Manson makes only a dollar 25 an hour and soon he'll be heading down to Connecticut to work in a large mill, where he can make twice that, pushing a broom. Not only does the bit steel become a blade, but the axe begins to assume the final shape of the pattern desired, whether it be a half wedge, main, Connecticut, Michigan, or Jersey pattern. The roughly formed axe now receives the refinements of final hammering. Hammering the head with a steel pin inserted through the eye ensures a uniform socket for the handle, and slightly tapering sides are permanently set under the trip hammer and at the anvil. Head is at last squared off by the percussive strokes of the rapid hammer. Manson has completed forging an axe. The forged axe is now ready for grinding. His first grinding is called raising, and here wood further shapes the axe by grinding off the top of the head and the side, and then grinding the bit down to the proper edge for tempering. The tongue he sits on gives him greater pressure between axe and stone and a lot more steadiness, all of which help him grind each axe to near duplication. The grinding wheels wood uses are made of carborundum and have replaced the traditional sandstone wheel. An average sandstone wheel used to measure 78 inches in diameter and weigh nearly a ton and a half. Roy Barrett tempers the axes. Each axe, after reheating, is thrust into the ancient bubbling tank of cold brine, where the sudden temperature change locks into the steel bit, the hardness so essential to a fine axe. Barrett's skill and timing and eye for the look of a perfect temper are the key to this critical step. For if any portion of the bit is left soft, the edge will turn in use. If too hard, it is likely to break. These axes, the products of craftsmanship, forging, grinding, and tempering, now await only the refinements of final grinding, paint and label, and the application of a handle before they are ready for purchase. Wood removes all rough edges. The marks of earlier raising puts the final edge on the bit and polishes up the bit about three inches. The skill of his hand has been an important part of the creation of these axes from the raw steel bar to the glittering finished blade. When a blade bites into timber, the strength of the lumberman's shoulder becomes the force of the axe through the handle, and thus every good axe must have a handle of great strength and a head that fits true. This is Barrett's responsibility. His skill at handling an axe and his eye for alignment of blade and handle are unerring, and to a great degree unappreciated. So too are most of the other steps and methods of axe making used in this shop. Not once in the creation of these axes has a precision measuring device been used. Craftsmans eye and muscle has determined the size, shape, and the quality of a fine tool, a product of the hands of men. It's crazy, right? So we learned that, you know, you get paid a buck forty-five an hour. We learned how to light a pipe by putting your axe head in the forge and then holding it by your head. So that's good. We got that going for us tonight. That's a good takeaway. But it's just amazing, you know, watching that. I mean, it's interesting even for us watching, watching that as makers now, like when we went through, we're learning how to halft axes, right? Just started doing this a couple years ago. We were halfting axes, putting handles on them, and, you know, the first bunches are, you know, we're failing as you're supposed to, right? And so the handles are falling off the axes and we're like, remember that pioneer axe video?  That was the secret. Basically watching that video. Like it was said in that video by 1965, it's over in Oakland. All of those, all those factories you saw that are the factory you see along the stream is gone. So right here, this is looking over the school street bridge and that big building where they were making the axes would have been right here. We did a craft fair. We went up to Oakland in November and we had all these like cool, like Oakland t-shirts and we're like, ah, we're going to sell all this stuff. You know, it's going to be great and sell axes. And most of the younger people had no idea that their town was the center of axe making, you know, in Maine and really in the country. It was really, it was interesting. But if you go up there today, we of course went, walked along the stream, found all these, talking about these giant grinding wheels. What they did with the ones they finished with the old sandstone wheels when they were done with them, what do you do with all your garbage? You throw it in the creek. So they threw it all in the stream. So all along the stream there are giant grinding wheels in the water. Yeah. Well, now they're going to hold something else back because the other thing is what's in here are the old foundations of the factory. And along the river, the foundation is brick cinder block. And they used old grinding wheels as part of the foundation. So they're just like chinked in with all the other stuff to make the wall along the river. It's pretty cool. So if you have an opportunity to go up to Oakland, it's fun to walk the river. So at this point, no one's making axes in Maine. All the high quality axes really at this point, they're made in Sweden, grandpa's brocks, or they're made in Germany. So that's where all that all of those good axes are being made now. So our, like we said in that video, our idea is we want to bring back axe making to Maine. And so Steve's going to talk about what we've been doing with that. So they talked in there the main, the half wedge. I'll pass a couple of these axes around, but all different regions have different patterns of axes. You know, Michigan had its own pattern. There's one called Jersey, which is pretty interesting. We have these posters back there.  But anyways, this is the main wedge and this is what we're trying to replicate. And it just had a very distinct, very angular profile with a very thick pole, very heavy pole. And you know, we don't know for sure, but every region had its own kind of axe design. There's one called Puget Sound, which is crazy. It's about this long. It's a double bit. And it's probably used, it was used out in, you know, Washington, Oregon to take down the big Douglas first. But anyways, I'll pass this around. We're going to make one that's about, you've seen that before probably. Oh, that's axes. So what we're going to do is make what's called a two pound or two and a half pound cruiser or boys axe. These are all three, three and a half pound axes. The other thing is we have a, back in the day, they made all the handles here in Maine, most of them out of ash. So we have a source of white ash that we're going to use because historically that's what would have been put on an axe.  They would use maple. They use horn beam if you could find it. But instead of using hickory, we're going to use white ash. So what else am I missing here? And the name of our axe is going to be called the Allagash Cruiser. And all these old axe labels had, you know, little kind of interesting things written on it. So ours is Wicked Sharp. I'm not kidding. So, well, and that's the beginning of that, that part about the Emerson Caesar, the different axe labels. That's what these are. We'll make these t-shirts. But there were hundreds and hundreds of axe labels. They're beautiful. They're like the labels that would be on, you know, like vegetable crates. And they're gorgeous. And so we want to do that as kind of an homage to the old labels. Yeah, because one of our favorite labels is, what's it called? Our special axe. Our special axe. It says made good, not guaranteed. And that's in one of those paintings. I think it's in that one. It's the double bit version of a main wedge. And I've ground this down so this is totally safe. It's not going to be dangerous like scissors. And that's for snow kneeling. That's snow kneeling, which is the main major. Yeah. Okay. So I think we're going to have Gabriel now talk about how we're making these axe go through the materials that we're using, the equipment we're using, and kind of go through this process that we're starting to make this axe. Okay. So my name is Gabriel McNeil. I have been Blacksmithing for a little over 12 years or so. I got my start. I grew up in Unity, Maine, so not too far from Oakland. And I've probably been past that place not even knowing it existed thousands of times. So in that video, how they made axes with the cool trip hammer and all that old dangerous equipment, we're doing none of that, unfortunately. We're using new dangerous equipment. We're using brand new dangerous equipment. Actually, we're in safety glasses. Yes. Yes. Keep your eyes intact. So the other thing that they did in that video is used a mild steel or soft steel base with a high carbon bit. So the reason why they did that was the high carbon tool steel was hardly to come by back then. It was pretty expensive to come by. So fast forward to now high carbon steel. We make it by the tons, thousands of tons every day. So it's easy just to take a whole block. This is about a three pound block of 10 to 45 high carbon steel. We take it from this round section. So we take it from that three pound round section right there, put it in the forge, which is very similar to the forages that they were using back then, but instead we're using propane gas. And heat it up to about 2,200 degrees approximately, hopefully a little hotter. And then we forge it out so that that round puck turns into a square block. So after the square block is all formed up, we heat it back up, get it up to as high as we can possibly get it to go. And then in the hydraulic press that we have, it's a C-frame press like this. It's got a big cylinder mounted on the top. And in the bottom of this, we can mount these dies. We can interchange all these different dies into duty different applications for forging anything. This particular die here is used to punch the eye through the straight through in one heat, right through that big block of material. So we'll be able to set that metal in there, drive it right through, take it out, flip the metal over, drive it right through again, and we'll end up with the hole in the eyes. So once that process is done, we wind up with a squished up block very similar to what this one is right here. And we also end up with what's called a bisquette. And this little bisquette is the material that is punched out of the middle of that right there. That's it. That's the bisquette. Rest of it just squished. So after you get that punched out, it has to go back into the fire, heat it up back up to back up to temperature. And then we gradually open the eye up so that it will end up being in the shape of an axe eye for the handle. So we have a very specific size that we're trying to achieve. So after the eye gets shaped up the rest of the way with the different dies, then we're able to pull all that material out to start the shape of the axe. And then finally, after we've got the rough shape pretty well down to where we want it, we're able to finish it all out and make it look real pretty with a nice axe-looking piece of coconut. And this will go through, get another round of grinding, get it closer to the final shape. Then we'll go through and heat it up again, crunch it, heat treat it, make it so that it holds a good edge. And half it and we're ready to rock and roll. Which number is that, Dave? This one is number two. That's the second one made. So the trick for all this for us has been, and Gabriel has been getting the eye made because the rest is just moving material. And so that's what we're really focusing our effort on in the next month or two, next day, you know when we get it figured out tomorrow. But it's really that that's the trick is making the eye. And I think that's what, when Gabriel and I were at the shop last night, that's what we're focusing on. The rest of it, the shape of it, how long it is, all that's the, I mean it's not like it's simple, but that's the easy part. It's making the eye, getting the both the walls of the eye equal, making sure that it's consistent so we can make these in a kind of a production environment. There's a lot of people that are making really nice axes right now, but they're blacksmiths and they're making them one at a time and or they're making them to order for people and they're awesome. But our idea is to bring axe making back and to have some kind of a production facility where we can crank out, we're certainly not going to crank out, you know, 60,000 a year, like like Dunn Edge Tool was doing in the 1890s, but to get to some kind of a process and that's working through it. That shape head, is there a name for that shape head? It kind of looks like a Hudson Bay axe, but not really. We're basing everything off of patterns.  You run down again to that tree, you just take off all the limbs and get that stuff out of the way. Right, because the axe we're going to make, you know, there is a single bit bigger felling and chopping axes, three, four pounds, there's double bit axes, they can be small, big, and then these camp axes, boys axes, we figure we're going to start with making this camp axe. And so it's a traditionalist main wedge pattern, no one's making that right now, no one's made it for years. And that's the pattern we're going to make. And then eventually we'll figure out if we want to make a different pattern, but you know, we're very focused on trying to do one thing right and take our time and get this done. And then we can branch out the other stuff. We've learned that. So what we're going to take you through right now is Barry's going to talk about what we're doing when we're restoring axes. And one of the big tricks I kind of alluded to is halting or handling an axe, which seems pretty easy, right, because there's a hole, you put the thing in it and it's done, right? That's what we thought. That's what we thought, right. We were wrong. Yeah, we're really wrong about that. So my name's Barry, I'm one of the other partners here in this dog and pony show. The, Steve alluded to the fact of handles in the woods and the variety of stuff that is and can be used. I mean, you can use anything, really. I mean, if you want it to last, you want something that's going to be stronger and resilient so that it holds up to the striking force and everything. But regardless of what you're using, there is kind of an art to applying this and putting this on, putting a head on here. Probably is within the respect of the hand. We'll talk a little bit about the anatomy of it, the parts. But the shoulder of it is this kind of this at the, what we call it your thumb side, if you want to call it your thumb side, is that little bump out there. That is the shoulder. Then we have the back of the, and the belly. Kind of makes sense, right? And then the toe of it, and then this is sometimes referred to as a fawn's foot, depending on how it's shaped. Some of these are shaped very angular and what's more severe looking than others and some are very more rounded. Some of the ones that we have taken in are a little too severe. So we've made some modifications to kind of make that a little bit smoother and make it feel a little bit better in hand. But regardless, that's not necessary for using the axe, but it can make it feel a little better in hand. So these are the fawn's foot, the scroll end, the swell end where some of the double bits, let me double it for this stuff. The double bits where they're a straight handle, they just kind of uniformly have a little bit of a swell out at the bottom end. Again, it gives you something like a baseball bat, not quite a knob, but to hang on to so you don't let it slide out of your hands. And then the shapes, for the most part, are oval, or some oval shape, the handles themselves, but you'll see sometimes old ones that are octagonal. So you'll see that it's really kind of pretty steeped in a kind of reproduction of an octagonal handle for one of our double bits that we know. Do we customer answer or is it still one? Yeah. But it's really kind of neat. It doesn't feel bad in hand either. There's not a lot of angle to it that it's not really harsh in hand. As far as shaping and fitting it, the handles that you can buy commercially, first things that we have to be concerned with are the orientation of the grain. So commercial handles is totally just close your eyes and pull a handle out and look at it. You'll have just as much luck in getting a good one with your eyes open or closed. It doesn't matter. It's just what's there. And even when we go to our supplier and pick up stuff by hand, look at it. We get stuff home and we go, well, we missed that one. That one was three degrees. We weren't hurt. But there are two ways you can look. You can look at the font's foot end here or on this end. And really what we're looking for is as close to vertical as possible. The grain orientation, think about that, is running in parallel with the blade with a bit of it. And the theory behind that is it allows those fibers of the wood to flex and go with force as opposed to being struck and splitting. So we used to have an example of a handle that was clearly cross-grained. It was 90 degrees and you could see all of it like this and it had delaminated itself. It was just in layers. You could just see it. It was an older handle by a few, but still it was very clear how it delaminated itself. It just kind of split in layers. So the orientation of the grain is very important. And there is some variation to that. 20, 25 degrees, something like this is acceptable. And then the handles that you can purchase, they are all sized by the type of axe. So boys axe. Single bit, double bit cruiser. So the cruiser bits are a little bit smaller. As an example like this, this is an unusual shaped handle, but this is a little bit smaller because the cruiser double bit is a smaller head like the small single bit axe is. And what we start with is really just finding the shape close to it. We start removing some material. We use these pictures here with a spoke shave. We have a little shave for us and we just start taking some material off and get it to just get started. Once it started, we'll take it off. We'll see where it's taken up material. We'll remove material. We'll start it back on again and we'll continue down. And what we're trying to do is achieve that nice as customized fit as possible. With the restorations we're doing right now, they're all different. Every single axe is different. They've been damaged. The eye might be distorted a little bit. Not so much that it can't be used again. And every manufacturer, they're just a little bit of variation. So we are really custom fitting these axes to these handles. Or vice versa. And then finally, once we get there, and most of the ones that we're getting now, there is no little kerf or slot cut in them. And we cut that ourselves, which we prefer actually, because the depth of it can vary depending on the axe. So you want about a two-thirds of the depth of the eye for that wedge slot to go. And some of these commercially ones that they're already cut can't control how deep that goes. So we will cut those ourselves once we get about 90% done or so. We'll cut them and then we can finish the process. Yeah, when we get bored with this. And then for us, very simple, we just put a hardwood wedge in as tight as possible, down as far as possible. And again, ensuring if you look at any of these going around, some of these older ones, but we're looking for as close a fit around the top and the bottom, so we're filling as much of that eye with wood. So there's wood to metal contact, friction. And in some cases, if you look at these when they're done, you'll see just the tight little bit of a flare at the top of the axe. And that just creates that little bit of almost like a wedge of the handle itself. And we tend to leave these a little bit proud so that there's a little bit of room there. So if you had to make an adjustment because something loosened up, you have a little room to pound that back on and maybe put a little something on that wedge and jam that wedge down a little bit more to get you through the rest of the afternoon until you have to replace the handle. No metal wedges. No metal wedges.  And we don't use metal wedges.  Typically what you'll find is a wooden wedge, full length of the slot of the handle, filling the eye just parallel with the wood of the handle. And then you see this little metal wedge that's kind of put in across the ice. What is that? Does it make people feel better? I think that's part of what it is. The metal ones, you know, the stepped kind of metal ones that really look like a little arrowhead almost, they can tend to split these panels. If you think about it, you just might put a little bit of a chisel through there and it can split that. Some of the ones that are out there you see as well are just a round circular one. They're probably maybe a half inch in diameter at the most and they have kind of a taper to them. I know Grandpa Brooks uses that. Again, not being a physicist or an engineer, but it's, I can't imagine it's exuding all that force in addition to the wooden wedge. Again, it's this modern day feeling comfortable. Oh, it's metal, so it's going to hold up better. I mean, we've pulled, we've pulled heads off old axes for restoration. They're taking quite a bit of time and there's been no metal wedge.  So it really proves that it's really the friction, it's that physical force of friction that keeps that place in the tight fit. Restoration-wise, if you're ever looking around and want to keep about and see if you want to get an old axe and you want to fix it up yourself, which there are loads of people that do that on their own without all this fancy high tech gear that we have for things. They don't have a flag or anything. There are some key things you want to look at. First of all, how damaged is it? So you'll find something somewhere and you'll see all along the cheeks and the surface here, these very prominent divots and pitting, right? It's very severe. You could see, like the difference between surface rust and body rust in the car, right?  And that's really kind of the thing. Some of these you'll see on one side are all pitted because it's been sitting up or down, depending on the environment it's been in. That's cosmetic in some respects. You can clean that off and it looks okay, so long as the bit end is not so pitted. But we've had some where the bit is so pitted that every time we take a pass on the grinder to kind of get that edge screwed back up, you guys don't have a little chip because you just keep cutting through all these divots. So those are things to look at. The pole end, so that's that pole end that we, we'll get right out of access here. So the pole end, this is not a hammer. As Gabriel pointed out, the older axis, the mild steel was very soft. It was not meant to tolerate that striking. Maybe it wouldn't wedge if you pound it in a wedge and you're bringing a tree down, okay, or it wouldn't tend to be safe or something very mild. But people use these as hammers. Some of the ones that have taken in are just horrible. They've been brutalized. But the problem with that is to some degree that can be removed cosmetically by filing it or grinding it as we do and making it look cosmetically better. It's really not a functional thing. It's just a cosmetic thing. However, if that's been damaged enough, the eye can then be distorted not evenly, and then you are on the risk of being able to fit a handle on there properly to have a sail on sailor. So looking at that, and that's only, you can really only do that once you get the old handle out. What are the ways that people remove all the handles? Correct. And is that a good thing or a bad thing? It's a bad thing. What we've done in the manufacturing of the axe by heat treating it, we've created a temper that will hold an edge by repeat treating it, i.e. putting in a fire to burn out the old wooden handle, you have now changed that temper probably to a lesser degree and ruined it because it's not done in a controlled way. So that is an old way. I mean, I remember hearing that.  You know, take it out. So really the best way, what we end up doing even without a drill press, you can just drill some holes, knock it out, put it in a vise, soft vise, some soft brick vise, and just kind of knock it out with a piece of wood and a hammer, just kind of knock away it. Really like playing, don't break the ice. You just kind of get the holes in it, and if you get it going, kind of one piece falls out, and once you get the pressure taken off, you can get that handle out. And then you can look at the eye and see is it really distorted, is it not. We're also looking for cracks. And then cleaning this up, you can use Scotch-Brite pads, there isn't a whole vinegar soak, you've got to get that off, or other things to remove surface rust. Any of those things that are fine, the Scotch-Brite pads are great because they're fairly easy to use, and you can just kind of rub them down. And then you can also, once you get it cleaned off, again look for any obvious cracks. There are people that will say, well, you can weld that crack and fix it, but then, yeah, you can, if you really want to go through all that trouble. We don't take that trouble. If it's cracked, it's beyond use. We don't. We make a trailer that's covered for it. We're out of it, is what we do. And really, you know, if you're restoring, you find something, is it valuable to you? It's up to you, right? Is it something that's a collector's item? Again, that's up to the collector and the person that's there. But if you're choosing an axe because you like it, and it looks cool and you want to use it again, or something, then that's the right axe. I mean, really, it doesn't matter, aren't it? So, with our process, because we're choosing axes of a variety of vintages, a variety of manufacturers, some with no labels, as we've already illustrated, with paper labels you don't know who they were made by or where they might have been made. We do test the hardness of the bit. So there's something called the Rockwell hardness scale. And formally, there's a huge machine in technology to test the hardness of things. But they do make these hardness chisels. And the chisels are calibrated in two-point increments on this scale. And we have a set that starts at 50 and goes to 62. And really, that's that optimal. That mid-50 range, upper-50 range is that optimal. Hardness of the bit so that it keeps the edge, but doesn't break because it's too hard. And so we'll test all of these. And there have been some that, boy, this is a beautiful looking axe. We had a nice old Snow Neely double bit. Oh, my goodness. This is like spark. It was just literally below 50, which we can't measure below that. We said, well, it's not going to be any good. So that's not something you're going to say you can do on your own, but it is something that we consider because we know the quality of the bit and it's still going to hold an edge. Well, one of the big modules that we learned early on is you don't sharpen an axe. You can axe sharp. One of the things we do when we sell the axes that we restore is we put a sheet on it. When we restore it for you, we'll ask you if you want a sheet, but we'll hand it to you like this. Without the sheet on it. But essentially, one of the things we've learned is keeping tools in working order requires that you take care of them. This is one that was a refurb for a friend of ours. We put chamele oil on the bit, early axe head, which is a plant-based oil from Japan. That's what the Samurais used on their swords. So you know it's bad. It also doesn't congeal like other oils. And then the other thing is, I think Barry found this one out, but for the axe handle, we use linseed oil. And the mantra is, you know, once a day for a week, once a week for a month, once a month for a year is the idea. So when we give these axes to people, or sell them, we don't give them away, what am I talking about? We remind them that this thing is going to require some linseed oil so that the handle will stay protected. You know, when you go to the hardware store, the handles all have lacquer on them. And the lacquer is not because they think that's a better way to kind of protect an axe. Think of it as plastic packaging for whatever you buy in the store. They just put lacquer on it because that's what protects it and seals it completely.    So really, that's our kind of care tips for axes. And then the... So we have like a tool roll that we sell to take care of your axe in the field. So one of the things people will do, heck, we used to do it when we were kids, was you'd take your axe and you'd sharpen it. You'd put it on a grinding wheel, right? Dad's got a grinding wheel in the garage. You just put it on the grinding wheel? That's right. The problem with that is, it's going to heat the axe up and then you're going to lose your temper. So that was one of the things we learned. I thought it was a temper. Right, and then, yeah, well, he would always lose his temper. But, and so, what we always suggest is, I mean, the grinder we have at the shop is a 2x72-inch grinder. So, and it flies. So you never really... You're never really heating the axe up that much. But, you know, just for home use, file if you need it. And then once you get the axe sharp, like Steve said, just keep it sharp. And the way to keep it sharp is really just getting a little honing puck. Okay, this is a landscape puck. You can find them online. They're 15, 20 bucks. That's a good one. We have just worked with this honing guy down in Massachusetts. Don't groan. And he's worked with us on this. This is a Belgian Blue Cotical 4000 grit garnet side on here. This is a diamond hone on the other side. This is 120 bucks. This thing will last for generations. But the thing about this is it's nice and soft. You can really, once it sharpens the axe, it takes about two runs at it. It's going to get back to sharp. But use a stone. You don't have to use this one. But I mean, use a stone to do that. But you'll see an adventurer if you're using it, and you get that bluing of the bit. That's like, dude, it's over-eated now. So that's not good. The last thing we should pass around, which was funky, we already picked these up before, but these are Adirondack handles. These were a double bit axe, but it's a curved handle. It's not straight. Everywhere we go, we ask people about why we should have a curved handle on one side, which is good. And then the other side's kind of funky. It's like, what's up with that? And the only thing we've gotten so far is that you use the side that had the best kind of physics to cut a tree down with. But a lot of these farmers and guys in the woods would use the other side for ground work with roots and stuff where you'd hit the roots and dirt and stuff. And you'd just have a sharp side for felling. And you'd have another one for... The other side would be for ground work. But if you have any ideas, we welcome them. We've contacted the museum and the Adirondacks that has one of those hanging on their wall. They can't even tell us what it was for. So if you can actually make up a bit of a story, it'll probably work. Or maybe a t-shirt in it for you. Yeah. Okay. I think that's about it. That's it. Thank you so much.


We really have so much heart in this brand because it speaks so closely to ourselves. So it's, it's, yeah, it really is. It's not like a company that we started hoping to just, you know, make money and change the world and just fill a gap in the market. We really do find a need for our brand. So we are so happy to be doing what we're doing. And I don't, I don't really see a day that I'm like, you know what, I'll give that to someone else.


Hey guys, how are you today? Today, we are here with another video specifically showcasing my product line of stamps and stencils and other things from my Etsy shop, the link for the shops in the video description. My design team has done a phenomenal job this month on the videos and we've also made some changes to the website and the design team blog page specifically, I will link it in the description below where you have a surprise article from somebody other than me. This month, I gave them all the prompt of backgrounds. Take the materials that I provide you and create some interesting backgrounds and we're talking about that in front of my large delusions here, which I've been trying to finish and I haven't filmed all the pages, but in a lot of the pages I've been trying out specifically, some of my new stencils. You can see the one called seeds right here. This is a new one that's currently available and Did I use one on here? I thought I did. Might be covered up now though. Here's another one. This one is called plus. This one is soon to be available. It's not quite available yet. So there's a lot of different ones out there. I have amassing a slow collection Some of them that you will see me using aren't available quite yet, but they will be soon. This is the last page that I did. And I used a number of different things. There's a lot of layers on here. You can see the plus stencil again back here in the background. Layering your stamps and stencils and paint on your papers or on loose pieces of paper to create backgrounds that you can scan and photocopy and then use over and over again. You've got your own custom paper. It's always a great idea and you can have a lot of fun with it. I need to start a new page, so I'm going to really quick grab my stencil binder. And I've got some leftover paint here on the table. I'm not going to show you a full completed finished page. I really want you to go watch everyone else's videos, but I'm going to grab a couple of stencils. This is one of the ones that is currently available. This is seeds. And this one will soon be available, stars. That's the plus one. I want to try this one with some texture paste. I think it would be really cool. Barebones profile, barebones face. Those are coming soon. This is another one coming soon called poddling. This is another new one. It's called direction. And let's see. These are all currently available. This is probably my favorite one. And let's do broken lotus. I have like 15 more prototypes on the way, as we speak. Poor Mr. Deacon. My friend, my friend, Mike Deacon, is the one that helps me get the stencils produced. And I think I drive them crazy.  My favorite ways to stencil is to use makeup sponges. I don't necessarily try for a perfect impression, but if you want a pretty perfect impression, then you don't want very much paint on your sponge. I like to use the paint and then let it dry and then you can rubber stamp over it with some of your stamps and just layer the stencils on top of each other. Don't worry so much about trying to create the perfect composition with the stencils.  And it is so much fun to create your own background papers that you can then use over and over again or send in happy mail or even, you know, just give away. Go on, switch colors and switch stencils. My desk is really messy. Really, really messy. And as you can see, I am not great about cleaning my stencils. I'm really not. I wait until they're really, really goopy. And then I put them in a wash tub with some Murphy's oil soap and water and let them soak for a couple of days.  Now that being said, if I've used texture paste or modeling paste, I clean it right away. It's only when I'm using paint that I'm not, you know, super careful about it. So you can see really quickly how you can just use a couple of stencils and start to create something interesting on your journal without too much effort. We haven't really done much.  I'm just trying to use up some leftover paint for another journal page. I just did in another book for another collaboration. That I just did. Now I don't want to mix these greens and purples too much because I'll just get mud. I'll get brown. That being said, I'm not afraid of a little mud. I'm also not looking for a perfect stencil impression, but that's not bad because I thought I had too much paint on this sponge. These are six by six and I've done them that way because that's what I like to use in my mixed media. I've discovered I rarely, I do own a lot of big stencils. I rarely use them in my journals, almost never. I almost always only use them in my jelly plate. And even on the jelly plate, I use a lot of the smaller stencils. Oops, you do have to hold it down. So really quickly you can start to get an interesting background with just a few stencils and then you can take a stamp and I have one in one of my stamp sets. Let's see, this one that has my messy handwriting. It actually does say something in particular. I won't say what. You guys will have to buy the stamp set and try to decipher it, but it does. All right, we are going to get a black ink pad. This is a Ranger Archival ink. Now if you're going to do this on a page where you think the paint might be wet, you probably want to wash your stamp off when you're done so you don't get paint stuck in the, but how cute is that for the start of a background? And I haven't really, I haven't really done anything. I've just put a couple stencils and a couple stamps down and already we have something that's really interesting.   I challenge you. If you want to see what my design team members have done, all their video links are in the video in the description down below. As is the link to my Etsy shop, my PayPal tip jar. If you want to support the free content here on YouTube by donating to the tip jar, please do. The link is down there. The link to my website's just gone through a new update. Check it out. Let me know what you think. And my happy mail address, my Facebook groups, all that stuff. It's in the description. So check it out.  Create some backgrounds. Do something unusual rather than just collage on the background or slap paint on there. Do something fun. Do something out of the ordinary. And if you create something really interesting, share it with the rest of us. We'd love to see. Above all, have a great day. Do something nice for yourself because you deserve it. And I'll see you later. Bye, guys.


Zen, yes, there we go. It is broadcasting. Good morning. Welcome to the first Unitarian Society of Madison. This is a community where curious seekers gather to explore spiritual, ethical and social issues in an accepting and nurturing environment. Unitarian Universalism calls us to work for love, equity and justice, as together we seek to be a force for good in the world. My name is Vicki Jones, and on behalf of the congregation, I would like to extend a special welcome to visitors.  As we gather in this time and its place, let us remember that we are all visitors in this life. We come together to find meaning and hope with all the other visitors in this life. And let us join our hearts and minds together as we celebrate life together. Now is the perfect time to remind you to quiet your devices, as I invite you to join me in a few moments of silence for contemplation, meditation, prayer as we settle in and come fully into this time and place together. Let us rise in all the ways that we do and join our hearts and voices together on hymn 57. All beautiful, the march of days I see, the hand that shaped the rose I've wrought, the crystal of the snow, hath sent the whole earth sealed at the sight. As we continue with the opening words remaining standing for our chalice lighting, let us reach the place of self, the place that is not alien to truth. Let us wash over with peace and serenity, with fears longing for light and heart, with living strength flowing in our veins bringing ourselves into fearlessness and into trust. May we join our voices together in the chalice sliding words written by Leslie Takahashi as together we say, All that we have ever loved and all that we have ever been stands with us on the brink of all that we aspire to create. A deeper peace, a larger love, a more embracing hope, a deeper joy in this life we share. I invite you to turn to each other and offer a warm greeting. Good morning. Glad you're here. Thank you, Vicki. We're invited to come forward for our time together. Come one, come all. Anyone who wants to come up? Good morning, good morning. This morning, we are going to begin the second day of a new month, December. This month's theme is peace. And we are also honoring various holidays and holy days. And today, thinking about the various ways that we can make them more meaningful. And one of the things that often happens on any day, but especially days with lots of plans, is that plans don't go exactly as we think they will. And so there are different ways that we can take that on. Here is a story of a Hanukkah celebration that did not go exactly as planned. But still, let's see what happens in the story Hanukkah Bear. Old Bear awoke from his winter sleep. He poked his nose outside his den. What was that? Something to eat. Old Bear's empty stomach rumbled. He shook himself all over, then lumbered out of his den to follow the delicious smell. Bubba Braina took the last potato latke from the pan and put it in the oven with the others. Bubba Braina was 97 years old and did not hear or see as well as she used to. But she still made the best potato latkes in the village. Every year at Hanukkah, all of her friends came to her house on the edge of the forest. How they loved those latkes. Bubba Braina always made plenty, but tonight she made twice as many as usual. Tonight was special. Tonight the rabbi was coming. Bubba Braina hurried to get everything ready. Just then she heard a thump on the door. She opened it. Rabbi, you're here early. How nice to see you. Grrrr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr. Grr.  Bubba-braina tugged at the old bear's fur. Old Bear growled, Brrrrrr! Oh, you want to keep your coat on? Well, that's alright. It is kind of chilly in here. Old Bear's nose twitched. Mrooomph! Thank you, Rabbi. How kind of you to say that. The latkes will taste even better than they smell. Old Bear followed his nose to the oven. Rawr! Rabbi, I'm surprised at you. You know we don't eat until we light the menorah. Grr! That's all right. I know you were teasing. I'll light the candles. Will you say the blessing? Rumpf! Bubba Braina struck a match and lit the shammas candle. Then she lit the one for the first night. Old bear muttered and growled. Rumpf! Grr! Grr! Who kept us alive and sustained us and enabled us to reach the season. Oh, Rabbi, you say the blessing so well. Bubba Braina sat down at the table. Old bear sat beside her. Let's play dreidel. We'll use these nuts. Old bear cracked one with his teeth.  Rumpf growled Old Bear. Don't worry. Don't worry. I have plenty of nuts if you need more. Bubba Braina spun the dreidel. It stopped on the letter Gimmel. I win! Bubba Braina swept the nuts into her apron. Grr! Old bear growled. Don't be angry, Rabbi. It's only a game. She tossed him a nut. Old bear begged for more. No, Rabbi, no more nuts. It's time for dinner. Bubba Braina opened the oven door and took out the platter piled high with steaming potato latkes. Old bear sniffed the latkes as she set them on the table. Do you prefer sour cream or jam? Bubba Braina asked. Grr! Growled the bear. Jam, I thought so. Bubba Braina smeared the five big latkes with jam and stacked them on Old Bear's plate. Old Bear gobbled them down. Bubba Braina laughed. You should use a fork. You have jam all over your beard. She wetted towel and wiped Old Bear's face.  Grr! Said the bear.  I can see that, Bubba Braina said. Old Bear ate and ate until all the latkes were gone. He felt drowsy. His head flopped on Bubba Braina's lap. Rabbi, you're sleepy. Who wouldn't be sleepy after such a meal? All the latkes are gone. It's almost time to go home. But before you leave, I have a Hanukkah present for you. Bubba Braina took a red scarf from her knitting basket. She wrapped it around the Old Bear's neck. I made it myself, she said. Grr! Old Rabbi licked Bubba Braina's face. Bubba Braina blushed. Oh, Rabbi, at my age. Old Bear shuffled to the door. Fromf, he growled as he walked off into the night. Good night to you too, Rabbi Happy Hanukkah. Bubba Braina took to washing the dishes when she heard another knock. I wonder who that is, she said. Shalom, Bubba Braina. All her friends stood at the door wishing her a happy Hanukkah. Shalom, everybody, Bubba Braina said. How nice to see you. I'm sorry I don't have any more latkes. The Rabbi came by and he ate them all. Bubba Braina, don't you recognize me? I am the Rabbi. The Rabbi couldn't have eaten your latkes. Everyone said he's been with us at the synagogue. Bubba Braina rubbed her forehead. Something strange is happening here. Rabbi, I think there is an imposter going around. He looks like you. He talks like you. He even has your beard. Just then, the children cried, look at the floor, bear tracks. A bear, and I thought it was the Rabbi Bubba Braina's had to sit down. She began to giggle. Oh, dear, that was a very clever bear or a very foolish Bubba Braina. Ah, well, let the bear have a happy Hanukkah. I had a happy Hanukkah too, and so will you, dear friends. Bring some potatoes from the cellar. Fetch my greater and bowl. Everybody has to help. Rabbi, if we all work together, we'll soon have latkes for everyone. Deep in the forest, old bear slumbered in his den.  The warm woolen scarf was wrapped snugly around his neck. Pleasant dreams, old bear, and happy Hanukkah. So, it's time for you to go off to your classes, but I invite you as you think about this month to think about how the unexpected may be part of your celebration. We will rise and sing as you go off to your class, number 221. Light one candle for the Maccabee children, with thanks that their light didn't die. Light one candle for the pain they endured when their right to exist was denied. Oh, for the terrible sacrifice, justice and freedom demand. A wisdom to niece-makers' time is an asset for some. Light one candle for the strength that we need to never become to our suffering. The pain we learned long ago won't tear us apart. And light together with peace as the song in our home lasted for so long is the memory that's valued so highly. We keep it alive in that flint. What's the commitment to those who have died when we cry out they've not? That justice would somehow prevail the burden, and this is the promise, and this is why we will not fail, lasted for so long. To our time of reflection, a reading from the writing of UU minister Jane Maldon, sort of a contrast to our time for all ages and mood, a reading called A Rose in the Snow. The year my brother died, my family tried to pretend our sorrow wasn't real, and we kept all our regular Christmas traditions. Although we were crazed with grief, we tried to fake it, and we're all miserable. Later when my father died, my mother decided we should take a trip for the holidays instead of staying home and being overwhelmed by memories. But it won't be like Christmas my teenage brother protested. It can never be like it has been before, replied my mother. Concord, Massachusetts was our destination. We checked into the historic Concord Inn on the public square and spent three days exploring the Wintry Village. We walked across the bridge from which the shot that was fired that was heard around the world. We discovered paths in the snow around Emerson's house in the Alcott house. We slid across the ice on Walden Pond. It was a wonderful adventure, but at the same time, we were all unhappy. We spent Christmas Eve in the Inn's pub, and I was not alone in crying myself to sleep that night. Early on Christmas morning, my mother and I rose at dawn, leaving my brother asleep. We slipped out for a walk. It was a frosty but clear morning. A fresh layer of snow had utterly muffled the town. For deep unspoken reasons, we headed up a hill to the old cemetery where many great authors and American leaders were buried. We were looking for the grave of poet Henry David Thoreau. The dirt walkway up the hill was quite steep and coated in thick ice. We pulled ourselves up to the top, hand over hand, using the iron handrail. And as we reached the summit, the steam of our breath appeared to be the only lively warmth in the chilly pink dawn. After a search, we spied through Rose Grave, a large tombstone cresting out of a snowdrift. And there, to our astonishment and joy, lay a single red rose. No one else was in sight, but some lone soul had made his or her pilgrimage in the first light of Christmas Day to salute that free spirit. My family no longer does Christmas, as we once did. Each year is now unique, and I like it that way. I have fewer expectations of Christmas and enjoy myself more. I live less in the past and try to appreciate my life here and now. Let go of what Christmas should be and try to live it in your own way. You may find joys where you least expect them, a red rose in the snow. I imagine that in this space, there are many thoughts about the coming month. I do not assume that you celebrate any particular holiday or any of them.  I found over the years that it is especially helpful as Unitarian Universalists for us to spend some time thinking thoughtfully about moving into this month, being more intentional. Because certainly, there will be a lot of ways of framing December that will not be helpful to us. And yet, there is something very ancient that flows underneath this time, ingrained in this hemisphere and winter itself, and in so many ways, alive in the spirit of the holidays and holy days that are part of the coming weeks. At its very essence, there is an intent that lives that is essential to our spirits, I believe. As Max Coutts writes, when love is felt or fear is known, when holidays and holy days and such times come, when anniversaries arrive by calendar or consciousness, when seasons come, as seasons do, old and known but somehow new, when lives are born or people die, when something sacred is sensed in soil or sky, mark the time. Respond with thought or prayer or smile or grief. Let nothing living slip the fingers of your mind, for all these are holy things that we will not, cannot find again. There are important offerings in this month, and they come both from the various holidays and winter itself. Human beings have long been awestruck by the full range of the experience of winter. The ancient Romans wrote about the spiritual aspects of the winter month at Great Link. The Sufis explored the various images of the cold and how it translates into the soul in their philosophic poems. At various times, I've reflected in congregations on the substantial themes around life and death reflected in the realities and writings and imagination about winter. And yet, so many of us do as much as possible to separate ourselves from that very primal power in our lives and understandably so. Over and over again, winter's poets and creative sages have had us gazing into the distance of the dark winter in search of something. And we ultimately hope that what we find would offer transformation in new beginnings. But often, it also calls us into long, cold nights. Madeline Langel wrote, a few years ago, I went with children to the planetarium, and I was fascinated to hear the lecturers say that primitive people used to watch the sun drop lower on the horizon in great terror because they were afraid somewhere in them that one day it was going to go so low that it would never rise again. They would be left in unremitting night. There would be weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth, and the terror of the great darkness would fall upon them. But then, again and again, just as it seemed that there would never be another dawn, the sun would come back. Each day, it would rise higher and set later. She concludes, somewhere in the depths of our unconsciousness, we share that primordial fear. And where there is the first indication that the days are going to lengthen, our hearts too lift with relief. The end has not come. Joy is part of our lives, and so a new year makes its birth known. I do believe that somewhere in the fabric of our humanity, there is still that primal power. And as we approach winter, I think all of us have a mixture of feelings, and that is appropriate. Because winter is hard, especially in this part of the world, the snow, the ice, the cold. And the holidays are that mixture as well. Some years in particular, when our lives are difficult, it seems as if the holidays stand in bitter contrast to what we are feeling inside. And even in the best year, the busyness and intensity of this time can be overwhelming. Well, I believe that as is true with winter in the holidays, it is also true in our lives. What I believe this time calls us to do is to remember the original intent of the holy days of this season. All of our holidays that are part of this time in some way have their origin in the idea of asking us to connect more deeply with the truth of life in all of its complexity. The holidays are meant to bring us into relationship with what is, not with what we wish is true. They ask us to see ourselves in this time in all of its range. Yes, it is true that winter is difficult, and it always reminds us of our frailty and our vulnerability. But winter is also a time when deep playfulness and joy may exist as any spontaneous snow fight will show. It is also a time where we are asked to find our resilience. It is a time when the outside bitter cold makes the warmth of inside and the company of those we love all the more powerful, and therefore all the more difficult when that connection is not there. The holidays, the holy days, become a charade when we make them only about trying to find happy, happy, joy, joy. What they really ask us to do is to base our understanding of this time in what really is. Because the thing is, that is the place that will reveal the holy and the sacred to us. If we move into this time with the illusion of what we need to create, then we are going into it standing on a house of cards. But if we begin with the truth of what we really feel, which may be joy, but probably is a great mixture of things, and for some of us may be absolute dread, only by being real and honest with ourselves as the first and starting place. And the deepening touchstone of the coming weeks. Can we really let ourselves see the power of this time? Often what our culture will show us as the true meaning of the coming months is the absolute worst thing for us to really know what gifts are being offered. And the perfect way to ruin any deeper sense of connection with what the month of December may be about is to go to the mall and experience the clang of the crowd, the power of the gods of commerce. There is something deeper that is in the midst of this time that we are invited to. Our connections with each other need to begin with what is true. Maybe for this holiday, one of the best gifts you can do is to work on a relationship that is in a difficult place. Maybe for this month, instead of focusing so much on the overwhelming pressure of presence, think about all of the ways that you have experienced the gifts of your life and how you might return that generosity in meaningful ways. How is it that your heart and spirit are calling you to honor this time? It will probably require some quiet, some thoughtfulness, some conversation with people that you trust. But what if for this holiday season, you began where you really are, with what was really true in your life? So I wonder what the holy days of this month will bring to you. What difference might it make if you began where you are and if you let your life guide you through this time? I believe if you let the ancient rhythms and stories of this season speak to you as you are now, they have greater power for you than you might imagine. Beyond the noisy malls, your crowded schedules, the ubiquitous overuse of holiday tunes, there is something meaningful that is very old in this season and in the world itself, just waiting to do its work based on the truth of now and the larger truths that lead us into what matters most. What are you being called to in this holiday season? More in a moment. Most of my adult life, I lived in the Pacific Northwest. And a great deal of that time, I lived in Bellingham, Washington, serving the Unitarian Universalist Congregation there. And one of the gifts of living where I did was that I was about 15 miles from the Canadian border. And one of my favorite things to do to instantly get me out of the grind of church work was to cross the border, park in a park and ride, and get on the Sky Train. That would take me within minutes to one of the largest, most diverse, and international cities in the world, Vancouver, British Columbia. And in moments, I would find myself truly in a different world than I was in the little town of Bellingham. So one particular year, as I was making my way in late October on the Sky Train, I had made a deal with myself. It was my day off, but I had a lot of work to do. So if I let myself go to Vancouver, I would do a little bit of reading on the Sky Train. And so I had stashed in my pocket a small paperback collection of holiday stories. I was going to get a jump on choosing my Christmas Eve story. And so as I was thumbing through the book on the Sky Train, it was Monday and not very crowded. There were maybe two other people in that car. And as I looked up, the man sitting right across from me was staring at me with the strangest look on his face. And he said to me, I just have to ask, why are you reading the holiday book in October? I thought about all sorts of possible excuses that I could make. But I just said, I'm a minister. I'm doing homework for the holiday season. And he stood up and came and sat next to me. And I thought, oh, God, I wish I hadn't said that. But he looked at me with the funniest, most soft expression on his face. And he said, I know you can't use it, but I have a holiday story for you. Can I tell it to you? Well, what can I say? But go for it. And so here's what he said. The Christmas in the midst of the post-divorce time was one of the worst times in my life. I really have very little memory of that holiday period. And so that next cycle of the holidays, as I moved into it and was now living alone in my bachelor apartment over Grandville in downtown Vancouver, I wanted to do things differently. But I found myself on Christmas Eve Day having done absolutely nothing to prepare myself for the holidays. I'd been in such a funk for those previous days. And so I made myself step out of my apartment and walked down the street in search of what I don't even actually know. But I found myself walking into the first store that I passed by, which was a hardware store. And noticed that there was an entire table of remainders for the holidays on special. And so almost without thinking about it, I decided to grab one of the small trees that was a tabletop tree that actually had the lights embedded in the branches itself and take it home with me to try to make a little instant Christmas. The thing is, when I got it home and I put it on my dining room table and plugged it in, I realized that I had not actually gotten any ornaments for the tree. And I thought for a moment if I was even willing to go back out into the madness of the street. When I thought about my storage unit and how there had been entire boxes that my wife had packed for me to help me get out of the house more quickly as we were trying to separate our things. So I went downstairs and looked through that storage unit. And sure enough, in one of the boxes was a collection of my ornaments from before the marriage. I went upstairs with them and pulled off the top and realized that most of them came from my college years and my first years as a young adult and a bachelor. I began to pull out some of those ornaments. From the college years, pretty much all of them were crafts made from beer cans. I had a beer can Santa and a beer can Rudolph and an entire set of garland made from the tabs of beer cans that I wrapped very lovingly around my little tree. And then there was an entire bag of young adult ornaments that I realized basically I had gone to a garage sale, picked up this bag as it was, and taken it home. And it really was the Isle of Lost Toys bag of Christmas tree ornaments, the ugliest ornaments ever created. But I took them out one by one, including this strange little pecan that was supposed to look like Santa Claus and looked really creepy. But put it on my tree and I stepped back and looked at it. It wasn't lovely yet. And I found myself thinking about what else in my apartment might go on my tree that felt right. And in the back of my mind, I had been realizing that there was a box in my closet that I had chosen very carefully to bring with me. I went into my bedroom, opened my closet door, and found that box and went back to the tree and very quietly opened that box. Inside of it were the five ornaments that my wife had given me in the last five years of our marriage. As our relationship had moved into the waning years, we looked for all sorts of things to try to rekindle our joy together. And so for those years, we exchanged ornaments with each other and marked them with the year of that exchange. And so one by one, I took out those ornaments and placed them in various places on the tree. And with each year, I thought a little bit about something about that time. And at the end of it, I realized that there was one more ornament that was carefully wrapped in the very corner of that box. And so I took out that last ornament, and I looked at it. It was the ornament that she had given me that last Christmas that we were together, that Christmas that in the midst of me going through chemotherapy, we began to realize that something had changed so deeply in our lives that we no longer worked as a couple. But that ornament that she had given me as I looked at it was such a sincere gift of love. We both knew that the coming months would be difficult for both of us. And so I unwrapped that ornament and took it to the tree. And at the very top, I put it on the tree. It was a small ornament shaped like a snow globe. And inside it was a little boy wrapped up for winter, out in the snow. And it looked like he was throwing something in the air. And floating around in the top of the snow globe was a little gleaming star. And at the bottom of that ornament was one word, and the word was hope. As I stepped back and turned out the lights in my living room, it was the strangest thing. In that light of that tree, all of those ornaments, there was something so beautiful and real about them. As he sat next to me on the Sky Train, and he told me the story, he said, you know, in that moment, almost all of my entire adult life was somehow reflected on that small tree. All of it, all of the difficulty, all of the love, all of the hope was there. As I looked at that tree in that beautiful half light, only then was I ready for my holiday to begin. What is this time bringing for you? What is the gift that is waiting to be opened that is already inside of you? May this season help you find it and its power. As we move into our time of offering, we are given the opportunity to practice the art of generosity. And in particular, you will note that we have the opportunity to share our offering with the road home, and we are trying a little something different in how we inform you about the various recipients of our offerings. We shortened what we have in the order of service, but if you look in your red floors, there is a longer description of the organization and what it is about. We hope by trying this, it will give you a chance to find out more about the organization. As we move into this time of offering, may you be inspired by a spirit of generosity and of love through that spirit. May we now give and receive together. Our services are always a shared ministry. We would not be able to do what we do without many, many volunteers that offer their love and their time. And so we take a moment to offer our gratitude for that service. We are grateful for our sound operator, David Bryles, and our worship associate, Vicki Jones. Our lay minister today is Ann Smiley, and we are grateful for her ministry. Our greeters were Corinne Perron and Claire Box and our ushers, Liza Monroe, Dick Goldberg, and Nancy Daley. Our hospitality, especially the hospitality of coffee is offered by Blaze Thompson and Sandra Pilsch. And Dorrit Bergen is our welcome and info table person. We are grateful for all of the ways that you serve us. There is the opportunity for us to offer service to each other and to the larger world that we want to make sure you know about. Please promote the ongoing work with the Unitarian Universalist Service Committee by picking up one of our guests at your table boxes before you leave if you've not done so yet. Throughout the holiday season, it is one of the major ways that we support our outreach program in Unitarian Universalism, the Service Committee. And also, if you have not done so yet, take a moment to stop by the Giving Tree and talk about the various ways that you can make this season brighter for some of the families being served by the Road Home of Dane County and the Nehemiah Center for Urban Development. As we move into the cares of the congregation, may we take just a moment to make that a more meaningful time by allowing yourself to become fully present in this place.  As you breathe in peace and breathe out love into the space, we are reminded that we are all deeply connected with each other, that we each bring with us to this place joys and sorrows both spoken and unspoken. And it is by our common gathering and sense of purpose that we bring a circle of concern to all who need love and support. This week, in particular, we remember that we are grieving the loss of our adopted children's grandfather who died this week in Page, Arizona. His presence in our lives has been a gift. We hold in our hearts those in Anchorage, Alaska who experienced an earthquake, a significant one this week. And the family of Phoebe Yancey, who asks for the prayers of hope as Phoebe has her second MRI tomorrow morning. We hope with her family for another clean scan as Phoebe progresses on her journey with brain cancer. And from our recent past, we offer a celebration. We found out on Friday that former intern minister, Eric Severson, passed the ministerial fellowship committee on Friday afternoon. I know from my own experience that that is a major rite of passage. It is the last big hurdle before you receive fellowship, which is sort of the beginning of your accredited ministry time. Eric's journey has been a significant one. He was in my original congregation that I served in McGowanaga, Wisconsin. And so I am deeply honored that he has finally made it through his journey to be a Unitarian Universalist minister. In all of our joys and sorrows, some of which are too tender yet to share, may we hold them together, remembering that we are part of a larger connection that weaves us with each other. May we be grateful for all of the miracles and complexities of our life that we share and the hope that gives us the power to care, to remember, to love. I invite us to join together in singing our closing hymn, which is found either in your order of service it is not in your hymn, or will be projected up behind you, rising in all the ways that we do. Let winter come. Let winter come. And now, as we prepare to leave this place, may the truth of your life be the place of holiness for you. May it draw you into this month. May the gifts that are present become available to you, where you are. We extinguish this light, but not the light of deep wisdom, not the fire of our commitment to all that matters, not the warmth of love and compassion. These are in our lives until we gather in this place again. I invite us before we move on into our day to take yet another moment together in worship as we enjoy the gift of music.