Dyna, mae'n gweithio'n gweithio gwlad yma. A gynnyddio yn y peth oedd yn 100 ysgwrs, sy'n gwahanol yn ddefnyddio ar gyfer a 90 ysgwrs unigol. Felly mae'n gwahanol yn ddefnyddio ar gyfer. So dyna'n ddigon ni'n gweithio'n teimlo'n gwybod. Gweddyn ni'n ddweud i'r cyfnod oherwydd mae'n gweithio ei ddelch yn ei ddigon i'r mynd. Mae'n gweithio'n ddwy'n gweithio'n ddweud i'r gweithio'n gweithio'n ddweud. mae angen i'r cyflog y blaen yn gweithio i'r gheithio a'r wybodaid o'r cyflog. Dwi'n edrych i gael gwahanol sy'n cyflog yng Nghymru yn mesur yn cael ei gŵr. Rwy'n edrych i byd o'r ffrinn iawn i gael gwahanol. Ond iawn i'r gŵr e wedi gwahanol yn y blaen. Mae'r gwahanol mewn eu cyflog i inchynnad ar yr hyn o'r gweithio i g fragrance, nid nesaf, nid nesaf, ddwy dus yn ymweld i'r gwaith, Byddai mae'n ei hollwch ar bwrdd gweithio'r gweithio'r gweithio newid gan y gweithio'r gweithio.  It was kind of the people who were predominantly taking a lead to begin with. It did develop into a more national movement. The first petition gaining about 1500 signatures. There were later petitions going up to half a million at a time. So it really did pick up pace... ...with the petitioning and the organisation that started this initial... ... kind of petition. And they were quite unfortunate... ...in the fact that women weren't allowed to present to Parliament and Things. Have been on appeal John Stuart Mill, who had previously campaigned to become elected himself on women having the votes. So this was an idea that before organised action took place was already being discussed in society. So he ran on the idea of, you know, getting women the vote and so he was the one chosen to put this forward to parliament. Obviously it failed the first petition. But it meant that 73 MPs voted in favor of it and they showed those MPs and they Rwy'n dod â'r cyhoedd yw mae gen i'n ochr o'r cyhoedd yn hybyddio'r cyhoedd gen i dda gael i g Ground, mae'n gweithio'n aggryffrydeddol erbyn ac oeddwn i'r ghold. Donwch chi'n gweithio'n gweithio arall i� Charlynedd— rwy'n gweithio'n gwybod gan y gwoith, rydw i'r gwrs o'r cyhoedd ac mae'n gweithio'n gweithio'n gwaith. Rydw i'n cael ei f yarddi a'r wale i wneud efallai o'r hyn sy'n deillonol felly'r awrlosio ynhaeth mewn gwirionedd ar ynglynig i'r ffilm sydd rwy'n ei bwysig eu annol And from here on we start to see the events starting to pick up a little bit but we can I think sort of learn from this transition from just people discussing it to organise events starting to happen and that it was activism and campaigning it was a crucial method for people really starting to make a change it wasn't that this idea that you know, conservativeism and these backward views ac yn gallu wythig ar y llogion iawn y gwirio? It wasn't that at all that caused the change, it was people beginning to organise themselves in groups that were active, campaigning and trying to do things to reach out to other people to change their perspectives and to really make a change to society. Of course the material conditions at the time are really important for us to look at and this is really what we started to see with the chartis movement that happened shortly before this. Mae'r cwm yn ychwanegwch i'w ddweud y Cyflau Chartysgol gan y ffordd yn ymddiannol, a mae'n ddweud o bach gael o bach, o ffawr ac o'r llyfr, a'r cyfrifio ar y cyflau cyflau i'r llwyddo ymddiannol, ydych chi fod yn byw o'i weld ymddiannol, oherwydd i fewn i'r cymdeinidol, i fewn i'r cyfrifio i gael i'r cyfrifio?  Ac yn dweud mae'n gwneud yn ymryd i'w rhaid i'w ddechrau, ond mae'n gweithio'n gweithio'n gwneud â'r ffoto o'r bwysig ymlaen i'r ffoto, byddai'n gweithio. Mae'n gweithio'n gweithio i'w gweithio. Mae'n gwneud ei ffoto, ac yn dweud mae'n gweithio'n gweithio. ac mae'n gweld gwahanol sydd wedi'i'r olygu'r normall pethau'u cyfeiliadol a gwahodd a llun. O'r wyf yn ychydig. Mae'n tynnu'r amplwffyr ymlaen yn gweithio'r gwahanol a mynd i'r hoffi'r wych yn y golygu'r gwahanol a'r oesaf, i'n dweud ymlaen am rai'r ymlu sydd yw'r yn cyfwyno amdano, sydd wedi'u gwahanol yw'r uno мира'r ymlaen o'r wych yn cyfynnig. Mae angen y ddechrau sydd wedi cael y cyfnodau hanf infoed y llywsoedd ac mae'r hyn ac mae'n gwwglu at ystod o'r tyflau ond yn gyffredinol yn y parlydon a bod ein angen sydd yn ei ddyfiio'r ddigon. Felly mae'n recipio yn gweithio'r gwaith yma, sy'n ffost gael gwych yn ddigon o gyflyjuddau sy'n ddigon i'r ddigon y byddio'n cyffredinol. a thosc Talent might lead to real change in society, not just the panacea, it was just that people thought this was the beginning of a step to real change So two years later, after this initial petition, as I said, the petitions that they continued to put to Parliament began to pick up pace, the next going 21,000 signatures and by the end of the 19th century, still are good like 35 years on there was the beginning to get caught over a million signatures ac mae hyn yw yw dweud yn ysgol yn cyfeirio ymriyd gyda gwaith yn teimlo. Dwi'n meddwl i'w gotwch yn lleol gael a'i meddwl i'w meddwl i ddweud yn cyflwyr arall. Aso, dyna'r cefnodau, mae'n meddwl i'w meddwl i'w meddwl i ddweud y gallach i dd nullu dyng nghymru felly mae'n amdano i gŷtau a'i gweithio'r hyn yn y llyfr yn yw i gweithio'r tylko neu ddyn nhw'r cyllid arall. Dwi'n edrych yn sefydlu'r dyfosibl o rhan o gaf, o drafod o ffaith yn y sceisio ynddo i'r ffraith honno, byddai'n gyflwyfyr ar y Swyff workplace yn 1867, oedd unrhyw gwybod arME, oedig yn amser ymphoedd yng Nghyrch o'i gorydd o'r heb, o'r maes o'r rhagol a'r mynyn nhw, Ond ydywch – yn fawr, fel y cyfnodd y cyfnodd antisuffryds. Yn 휴gweithio chi'n gilydd hon yn ffordd ac yn ôl i'r arddangos o'r ffordd jats ymllun. Oherwydd y dyfodd y 80s yn cael ei wneud y ffordd antisuffryd yn ymgyrch.   Yn ydych yn fwy o rhan o'r rhan o'r rhain, mae'n rhan o'r lim wneud o'r lim. Mae'n ddod yw'r corff diolch, mae'n ddod i'n rhan o'r cifredu, iawn yn bynnwys phoedd gynhau. Felly mae cymryd yn cynnedig wyeb yn trewyd i'r wych ei wneud ar gyfer supplygiau, wrth gwrs yn ddweud eu cyfrwyngahol yn y cyfrwng pan gynhau.  A'r blwyddyn fwyaf erbyn yn bwysig o'n ffordd gyda'r bwysig, fyddai ei gweithio'r ffôrfau a'r pwysig Mae Gwysig Yn Gweithio Fwysig wedi gweithio yn gweithio, mwy o'ch fwyaf i ddoch i'r fwyaf yw ac yn gweithio'r gweithio'r bobl yn gwahanol iawn, Dwi'n gwybod i fynd i'r ystyried, unrhyw yma, y pwysig i'r pwysig o'r wii'r dplosfyniadau. Dwi'n dod o'r swyddfa i'r rhan o'r mwf��. Dwi'n dod o'r ddefnyddio'r wii'n rhan o'r rhan o'r sydd—— Rwy'n ddweud hynny efo'r ffordd o chwaraeon, oherwydd yn sgriff ac yn bwysig y ddechrau. Mae'r ddraeth i'n bwysig o'r rhan o'r mwybyn sydd bwysig i'r wiyb wnaeth o'u gynchai'r cyfry, Rhaid i'n gofyn arferiaeth ni'n dod yn oed, felly rhaid i ni wedi gwirio i chi'n gweithio'n yn yen o'r yr wrthogol yw. Bydd yn oed yn gweithio'n gweithio i'r ymddangodd hanes a rhywbeth syniadau gwneud yn agellawu a'r llwyddiadau o gweith. Mae hyn yn gwneud yn gweithio i rwydech chi oes o'r ei wneud o'r rwydech. Rwyda'n i'n gweithio i wych yn y stryg a'i ddefnyddio gweithio i gweithio'n dweud fâniadau. Yn gwneud o rhaid oherwydd y bywydio y doctor ffordd, ond yw'r ysgol yn widio ymddugwn furdigol ychydig, a rydym yn cael y bywyddo o'r ymgyrchu lle'r bobl yn y bryd.  So rydw i gael y ffôr â gweithio yw'r gweithio eich nesaf o chwarae o gwasanaethau gŷt yma. Rydyn ni wedi'i wneud, y pwysig, byw'r asem o'r pwyllgor pohwyeth Aberyddion o Acroeddoch i'r byw, eich cwerddol i gael mi gael gweithio ymwneud, i gael gwybod i gyrrau gwahanol gwirionedd. Roedd y gallwn ffulaen diwethaf o'r meddwl mewn Mhwyr Slyfrgeis yn yw'r meddwl i'r meddwl yn y DU, oedd yma'r bach ffulaen o'r meddwl yn ei ddechrau. Roedd yma'r gaeleg hwn ben popr, neu mae'n fawr yn cael ei bach yng nghyrch, neu rwy'n cael ei ddifethr i gaeleg ei gaeleg hwn yn y mhwy, rwy'n cael ei gaelig, mewn ddaeth i'r meddwl yn gallu ei bach, ond beth ond iddo teis. Ond wedyn bywch wedi cael pethau gydechau'r ddefnyddio amdaint yna, rydych chi'n chyflwyfu'r bwysig, ond maen nhw'n cymryd di'chwyddiant y hefyd i gyd, sy'n ddim yn cymliech i'ch vôl i chi mewn ffordd. A'r pethauio sy'n ddim o bwysig o gweld that na'r effeithio beth yn cael bwysig o'r ffordd. Ond mae'n gweld llei'n gweithio o'r wneud, ac mae'r tarlethau deistrach i'w gweithio fel ei fod yn iawn i'w ddechrau i gael y position i siarad. Rydw i'n dechrau i'n dda hwnnw i ddechrau i 1897, a rydyn ni'n gweithio i'r ddechrau i gael o'r acrynes, ac mae'n dweud o'r ddweud o'r ddweud o'r ddweud. Rydyn ni'n dweud o'r SS, mae'r ddweud o'r ddechrau i'r ddweud. Mae'r Uniynau National of Women Suffreadess Societies, a rydyn ni'n gweld i'n ddweud o'r ddweud o'r SS, facilities, so this organisation is the military force, the one I just talked about, and their focus is, and their belief is just that they want to lobby for change and that's through petitions and organisation, that's how they will achieve the vote. And this is also partly based on ideology, it's not based on any material conditions, it's not that they've seen this happen earlier and thought, right, this is a good idea. It was based on their belief and their understanding and again I suppose it's internalised oppression that they had to prove that women were sensible, and the only way they could do that is by winning the vote through these calm and measured like methods, and they were like this is, we've got to prove them wrong. And obviously that's proving idiocy wrong really, because they didn't achieve anything and if anything they prove themselves wrong in many ways. The Labour Party, as I mentioned earlier, was more closely linked with the campaign for the votes of women from the earlier days. It was later on that we were going to see a split away, so to begin with there is a strong focus on working women, and the suffragists tried to bring working-class women into the organisations and the groups that they were setting up more so at the beginning of the campaign. It seems to redo and get As you go down the lines and we'll talk a bit about why in a minute. So they believed that parliamentary methods were the way to change. So not just the pacifist methods but through the parliament itself that they had to get in there and they had to use the petitions as a way to just persuade people to their point of view. And they had by 1914 over 500 branches and over 500,000 members right across the country. So obviously that's not just in the main towns, not just in the main cities but wider than that. 500 is a lot of branches and the N-U-W-S-S is the one that includes male campaigners as well. The suffragettes were solely women but this campaign tried to incorporate men as well and there is a kind of picking up of men who are campaigning and want to be involved in women achieving the vote. So whilst this was happening, the W-S-P-U, the suffragettes and it's P because I think they're more political than... Anyway, these acronyms... I'm not helping, am I? Anyway, so as this slow glacier is ongoing, meanwhile the suffragettes begin to establish themselves from 1983 and it begins in Manchester as I'm sure people are aware with the pancoests. And they were aligned to begin with the independent Labour Party, which was a centrist organisation that was incredibly radical in its tone. Later in its days talking about overthrowing capitalism and overthrowing the ruling class. So you can see this very radical beginnings of it. However, it doesn't remain like that because the pancoests have a problem with the independent Labour Party and their campaign for universal suffrage and they believe that it's too heavily focused on men and so you see a split away later. But they begin this really because of the disillusionment with the failure of the suffragettes to make any amount of change in the time that they've been campaigning. And they see it as very limited progress and they think that the answer to that therefore is that we must have more militant means, we must have more action, we must be getting in people's faces and this phrase that I really hate is action like a raising awareness. So a lot of their tactics and their more militancy is based on the idea that they need more awareness of the vote for women. Therefore they're going to cause as big a fuss and make as much of a nuisance of themselves as possible. And in some ways that is a positive thing to do and that is a necessary step. So their kind of motto is deeds not words. So they're saying we've talked enough, it's not got us anywhere, we now need to do something different. And so as I said the earlier is focused on working class women but this begins to dwindle away slightly as their focus shifts from that to this kind of small group terrorism in a way. How far to the way? Thank you. So a lot of their campaigns become quite violent and I'm going to come on to specifically talk about the violence in a minute but they have a lot of arting campaigns, they begin bombing campaigns and they really do cause quite a lot of awareness amongst the public but draw a lot of negative attention to themselves especially because the attention that they're gaining comes through the press and of course the press is an arm of the state and so they don't look upon them favourably. They're not trying to raise the issues of why they're doing this, it's all negative critique. And their aim obviously as I said was to create this kind of spectacle but this garnered a lot of attention from the anti-suffragists who were saying, well you know look this absolutely proves that women are completely hysterical and irrational, how on earth could you consider giving these people a vote? And so their tactics begin to sort of turn people off, turn them away, it's not reaching out and encouraging people to get involved and it doesn't explain why they're doing these tactics. People are starting to look at it and obviously their opinion is twisted by the media as a negative thing that is just proving that women are completely should stay separate from the voting and that men should make those decisions for them. So this militancy increases rapidly from 1909 onwards up to the war essentially in 1914 and causes a lot of split. People become increasingly irritated with the tactics and the lack of political outreach to other groups of people, women and men. In particular Sylvia Pankers famously splits away and forms the East London Federation of Suffragettes which again I want to come on to Sylvia in a bit more detail later because she's an important figure especially when thinking about socialism and how we move forward. So this, I mean I don't want to read a big list of splits but serve to say there are at least five major splits that occurred partly because of this attitude towards the politics and the militancy but also because the Pankers were seen as quite authoritative figures, there was very limited democracy within the suffragettes or well there was democracy but they opposed greater democracy at a few key instances and so many women felt that how can we campaign for democracy when we don't even have, we don't even practice with our own internal democracy in this organisation and so again you got splits as a consequence of that and I got a lot of this information from an online course that I did by the Royal Holloway and I thought it was quite interesting to see that there were a lot of splits away at the time because people were opposed to and on the course there was kind of like this poll that was done which of these reasons do you think is why the women lost all of the support and what are the ways you think women should progress forward and get the vote in the future and I don't have the exact figures but it was well over 70% of people on the course learning about this, reading everything, all of this information about how the campaigns went and they were like oh pacifism is the way forward and so I think like there is a general trend in society, perhaps it still exists today that people like to choose the path of least resistance but also often people think that violent actions are completely to be opposed at all times that it should you know change should be achieved through the most peaceful process possible and whilst that obviously is true I'd much rather have changed through peace it possibly is quite naive and doesn't actually account for the fact that this pacifism existed for so long and these women were exacerbated, they were angry, they wanted change now and so this kind of violence I think is if not justifiable definitely understandable and so let's talk about this violence a little bit more because it is quite extreme and some of it perhaps is not the best thing to do and so the press use this kind of blanket term of suffrage outrages in a way to try and make it sound like it's just hysteria like these women are just outraged and also that had been used as a term historically as well to describe acts of violence and small bombing campaigns and things so the things that they begin to implement are bombs, arson campaigns, they cut telephone wires, they have a lot of events where they collectively smash windows there are threats and there's even an attack on the prime minister and I think you know today we would see these as terrorist attacks, they were at the time and they were completely unprecedented people were understandably quite shocked and surprised by these and there was a sense of panic and terror that they were trying to create especially in the cities like London but it was Christabel, Emily's daughter, who was the most vocal and persuasive, there's loads of accounts of Christabel going round to people's houses, they've just joined at the suffragettes and convincing and persuading them that a bit of action and militancy is the way to go forward and the way that they should be progressing if they want to do anything meaningful for the cause and she views what they're doing as revolutionary, she views these actions as the thing that will cause a real change she obviously doesn't mean that in the sense that we might mean that but she thinks that this is the only way and she's very very public and vocal about the militancy and getting more people involved now as part of the leadership Christabel maintains that the attacks that they carry out and the violence that they carry out is just against the property classes or it's just against property not against people but actually in reality there are a few instances where that isn't the case unfortunately although that I would say is the main trend so we shouldn't move away from that of course there are always like small kind of exceptions that break the rule but I think so on the whole this was against just property but some of it wasn't so as I mentioned they tried to attack the Prime Minister and ask him at the time when he was in Ireland and they threw explosive material into a packed theatre so regardless of who was in there obviously he's not going to be surrounded by members of the working class in a theatre in Ireland in the early 1900s but the point is that like this is an example of how they really kind of stepped up the terrorist actions against people and this was carried out into working class areas as well there were loads of bombing campaigns organised for trains going in and out of London that they tried to time and coordinate and often it was the third class carriages that were most affected by this which would have included more working class people so the tactics are not to be completely dismissed but certainly to be questioned in terms of the lack of outreach and the attempt to connect what they were doing to the actual struggle for the vote and so a working class struggle more broadly so this sense of panic really picks up in 1913 and you can get a real sense of the frustration that people are feeling and this is on a massive scale what happens is all of these women are arrested obviously on massive, massive scales to the extent that the prisons that they have can no longer cope with the number of suffragettes in the prisons and it's also because of the actions of the suffragettes so the suffragettes go on hunger strike repeatedly which leads to the literally torturous treatment of forced feeding of these women and the accounts I'm not going to repeat are horrific of what was done to these women and so what they had to do was they introduced a cat and mouse act which really explains the treatment that these women went through where they had so many women that were at risk of death in their care they had to release them, allow them to go home and heal and also free up a bit of space in the prisons and then come back at a later date to finish their prison sentence I think that tells you what you need to know about the extent of the torturing women they were on the point of death and they released home and they had an act of parliament to establish that oh I should have written down the real name of the cat and mouse act I should know is its nickname so this is happening right up until 1904 in the outbreak of war which really causes a dramatic shift in the events where all of a sudden the outbreak of war happens and the panchists declare a complete cessation of any militancy and they donate all of their funds to the war effort not only do they donate all of their funds to the war effort they rebrand the suffragette paper, their main campaigning newspaper, the way that they take their radical ideas to the people, the Britannia so we have this complete flip-flop of positions from being entirely opposed to a government that is torturing women for campaigning for the right to vote and also for their violence to one that is offering unflinching support to the government and their actions and obviously this isn't all of the groups across the country who are campaigning for the vote that take this on but it is the suffragettes led by the panchists and they get heavily involved in setting up all kinds of support groups of people and organising funds and materials to support the war effort and then of course alongside this kind of shift we begin to see a lot more women being employed for the war effort as doctors and nurses and then later in the munitions factories and so the government seeing this sort of shift reluctantly take these women on board as part of the war effort so I mean kind of negative but positive in some ways that women were involved in the war effort in such an extent negative in the terms of the suffragettes completely abandoning their principled argument against the government and you can kind of see some confusion politically there but in terms of women getting involved in the war effort it led to a huge increase in women in trade unions so women becoming more politicised especially working class women and we see an increase of 160% during the war years of women's membership to trade unions and that's no surprise but I think that's a very large figure to be looking at especially when you think that these women were employed on lower wages than meant to do the exact same jobs and so the politicisation of women is very important at this stage and Sylvia Pancas really is the only one with a class analysis who came out of the Suffragette movement and who has a campaigning group who's working during the war years against the government still and she is really keen to remain active, she agitates for strike action she agitates for a continuation of the militancy that the women had had to continue campaigning for the vote she continued to campaign for safe working conditions for equal pay she wasn't campaigning on the single issue of votes for women she was linking votes for women to the working class struggle to be rid of capitalism in general and she's really campaigning for workers to be striking during the actual war to create as much confusion and as much disruption as is physically possible and she says, I wanted to rouse those women in the submerged masses to be not merely the argument for more fortunate people which is what the Suffragettes were asking but to be fighters on their own account despising mere platitudes and catch cries revolting against the hideous conditions about them and demanding for themselves and their families a full share in the benefits of civilisation and progress so she's really pushing in terms of her rhetoric for women to be engaged not just in the struggle for the vote for women and hope that that will cause for the changes but saying like look don't just campaign for this be entirely political campaign for everything and I think that's really powerful that bit at the end where she says to share in the benefits of civilisation and progress entirely and that's for all people and I think it's kind of important to point out at this point that from here on Sylvia Pankas goes on to be one of the founding members of the Communist Party and Emily Pankas goes on to run as a Conservative candidate and this will be one of their class differences, right? Sylvia is particularly radicalised through her obviously the experiences of the developing revolution in Russia but also she's travelling around the north of England a lot more and is much more aware of the perhaps working class conditions and the situations that working women are in and so she begins to really question the tactics of the suffragettes she sees through the militancy and she sees how it turns off working women and how it doesn't reach out to explain their situation and how this will cause a win for women and it's not because she's got a problem with militancy and it's not because she doesn't want to go on hunger strike she herself is involved in a lot of militancy against the state and is on hunger strike like over 10 times in a year herself but it's because she sees how divisive the actions of the suffragettes on their own were and she saw this lack of outreach and said that what was needed was not more serious militancy by the few but a stronger appeal to their great masses to join in the struggle and that's a much better perspective that's certainly something that we could support and so she continues to campaign for strikes and the strikes do happen between 1911 and 1914 there are many key sections of the working class that go on strike the dockers, transport workers, railway workers, engineers and this has a very profound effect on the mindset of the government which I'll come on in more detail in a minute so obviously the war and everything that's happening that Pancos is observing is greater hardship for the working class women more than anybody else it is always the working class women who face the brunt of any kind of austerity measures and pulling away of reforms so she was seeing this campaign for the vote that ended in the vote for just the women over 30 and the property women and she calls it a fancy franchise because they called the vote the franchise the enfranchisement so she's quite scathing about it and becomes incredibly disillusioned with the parliament and parliamentary methods and the kind of social democracy that exists and she kind of takes on almost quite an ultra left position she says you know parliament is an institution that's been manipulated by the capitalist class and we should have nothing to do with it we could have no illusions in parliament we could have no illusions in the capitalist democracy and we should as communists never participate in it she says we should have nothing to do with it at all it's poisonous and Lenny actually criticised Sylvia Pancos for this because he said that you know the sort of broader perspective I suppose is that you should partake in politics you should partake in the existing social democracies as long as the waving class are looking to those organisations and working within them and campaigning there themselves in order to prove your own perspective and be able to have a platform for that and explain to people why it is that reforming capitalism is not a viable option so she called the 19 extension this fancy franchise and because it was only limited to the property owners and whilst that is true to a certain extent the vote that was given to these women showed the fear that the ruling class had at this time of the working class it shows that they were doing something and that they were scared of but also of course you've got the impact of events around the rest of Europe as well and so they were fearful that women workers in the factories would link up with the male workers on strike and that they could have their own revolution or something that would tabulantly disrupt the social democracy that they were presiding over and of course these I think are the more real pressures that caused the vote to be given in 1918 not this idea that women were given the vote as a reward for their actions during the war like thank goodness the suffragettes gave us all that money and took to our side so some people do believe that this idea that suffragettes had to begin with calm and patient work, showing them that women aren't hysterical was the reason why the vote was given but actually when you look at the material conditions that's just not the case so the 1918 Representation of People Act enfranchised all working class men for the first time and so Conservatives were incredibly scared again if they didn't give women the vote then they would have more of a fight on their hands because of this and they thought that giving the vote to some women would kind of offset that and placate them as is the situation with a lot of reforms reforms aren't granted because governments want to give away more of the state's spending and things they're given to percate the working class to prevent further struggles from occurring at a later date and of course the end of the war saw this revolutionary wave in addition to the 1917 right across Europe with revolutions in Russia, in Germany and the rest of Central Europe and these revolutionary governments were granting women the vote immediately and so again you have the pressure of the actions of the working class around the rest of Europe having an impact on the situation of the working classes in countries where they don't have a socialist revolution happening so when we talk about the need to build for revolutions in countries all around the world revolutions have such a big impact on countries outside of them it's not just for the benefit if they put the workers in that country we can see how that spreads quite widely so I think it's the pressure of all of these events together that led to the vote being granted but as we can see today that still hasn't led to equality and these women, they never saw it as a complete panacea but they did as I said at the beginning of the talk hope that this would lead to large amounts of change and there has been changes, there has been positives obviously women have much more greater equality now than they did in the early 1900s but as I mentioned at the start there are still large inequalities that exist there is a pay gap in gender not because largely women have paid a different amount to do the same job but because women are more likely still today to be in the low paid precarious work they are still the primary caregivers the number of single parents who are women compared to men is something like 80 to 20 I could go on, we are very aware of the situation that we live in though so I think there is still a way to go so what can we learn from the suffragettes well the most important things I think boiled down to three key points really that pacifism against the capitalist state alone does not work we are not going to gradually chip away as a state that has complete control over the working class we are at the beckon call because that is the way class society works secondly violent actions that are disconnected from the working class alienate people if that militancy isn't connected to a strong and clear understanding of how this is going to bring about change then people are turned off by that they are not interested in violence for the sake of violence and it has to be coordinated in such a way that it extends and expands people's understanding people need an alternative not just to see something being smashed they need something to replace that an idea to hold on to and therefore that leads us to the idea that it is the pressure from the working class that leads to the changes that we see in society and it isn't because of this withering away and it isn't because of individual acts of terrorism it's the pressure of coordinated organized working classes in trade unions striking and showing who it really is that controls society who really has the power and it is that that leads to women getting the vote and it is that that will need to be happening again in the future if we are to see any real change capitalism is the enemy it isn't just the fact that we need to tinker around and make a reform it is the entire system that needs to be overthrown if we are to see the real change that the suffragettes and the suffragists were campaigning take a hold and be prevalent in society as a whole and finally I think that has to be done through connecting the struggle for women's emancipation to the struggle for class emancipation only through eradicating class society can we eradicate sexism and gender oppression entirely and that is what we should learn from the suffragettes we should learn about how their tactics were used and how we can use tactics in the future and we should learn most importantly about that pressure that the working class can put on and how it is the working class that are the real people who control society and have therefore the power to change it thank you


Tumia kwa wajitama siwi twonimu Wa kwa wajitama siwi twonimu Tumia kwa wajitama siwi twonimu Tiki Mi na su Ramagukwo Gilinutu na kwa wajitama Houtu na maikini Ta maikini Kwa wajitama yaka Kwa wajitama siwi wajitama Niki In studio, I'm doing by a fantastic duo to my extreme right, and we, Alan Lawrence, he is an inspirational speaker, an author, and a relationship coach. Thank you so much for coming. Thank you for coming. It's a pleasure. You're welcome. Thank you so much. Next to me, I'm joined by Ruth Mudoni. She is a senior property advisor. Thank you so much. Thanks for coming. Thank you. I am blessed to be here. So am I. So am I. So am I. Well, today, let's engage with us, with you. The hashtag is the power talk show at Ram Maggo and that Y254 channel. Let me start with you, Alan. Yes. Can money ruin relationships? And how can we ensure that money is the solid foundation of our relationship? Yes, it happens because you realize that most of the people get into a relationship with a wrong perspective or with a wrong notion. Because I've always said that some people get into a relationship and they treat a relationship as if it's a financial breakthrough whereby they come, they come, they are not thinking of how can we grow together. Because the reason for the relationship is for us to grow together, for us to be able to advance ourselves because you need to do an introspection after I met this person. What have I really achieved as far as my career, as far as my finances is concerned? So this is a kind of discussion people should have from the very onset. I love what you are saying. You are saying that for some people look at relationships as a financial breakthrough. And which must become to you. Now, for many ladies, I will say this. They say I want a well of man, a man who is financially stable. Yes. And when you realize that they are not having that job you wanted, they are not earning that amount of money you want, they may be just fleas. Why do we do that? I think there is a notion of we want the rich people, want the rich men, people who are stable, people who are stabilized. I think it depends. You can't ask for a man who has money and yet you have no job, you have no car.  It's interesting because the lady is not financially stable and you want a man who is financially stable. And that is where we go wrong. I always say like there is someone who says that if you want a man who drives you, definitely find them at the parking lot. And yet yes, I do agree. So people really need to put in the work. Because at the end of the day you attract who you are. And you know like that angle of ladies, you realize that a lady for example has a state that his father was poor. And he accommodated the father. He didn't run away. Why like now they want a man who is rich? How can we ensure that money doesn't ruin relationships in your view? Both of you need to have the money. Let's start with that. So that it does not become you have to do this, I have to do this.  No, I think money in relationship you both need to put effort into it. Yes. I want us to give different scenarios, different cases, different possible cases in regards to this particular topic or conversation. And let me start with before you get into a relationship before you date. There is a time when you are still trying to get that potential, that perfect potential. The guy or the lady who is working, the lady who is well groomed and who of course comes from a humble background. What are some of the common mistakes most young people do or make before they get into relationships that pertain to money? Wow, interesting. I've talked about it in my book called Before You Think of Dating. And in the book I've talked of before you even consider a relationship, what is your life purpose? Because if your life purpose is not known, any person can take advantage of you. So you need to be hauled before you get into a relationship because otherwise you'll get into a relationship as if it is actually a rescue center from yourself.    And there is nothing as so sweet as enjoying your own space. Because the moment you enjoy your own space, when you come into this relationship, you won't be competing with this person. You'll be complimenting this person. So people need to reach to that point whereby they are hauled themselves, they have understood their life purpose and they have known the assignment they are coming to do into this relationship. Because a relationship is not on the foundation of feelings, it's on the foundation of commitment. You can say that because I love him, I want to date him. No, it can't. Because if we can use love as a artistic to be able to enter into a relationship, how many people fall in love with you? How many people? It's about commitment. That is why I don't buy into this notion whereby people say it was love at first sight. It was just infatuation. Because a relationship is commitment. You don't believe in love at first sight? No, nothing. You can like the person, but you can never love the person. It's a commitment. So you should not date emotionally, it's intentionally. A lady has seen a guy in a very nice suit, a mama Laurence. Laurence is in a tie, a three piece suit. They are nice shoes, nice socks, nice pocket square. Everything on the glasses. So this guy must be well off. When a lady is in campus, you realize that they always, for some, they tend to want to get to have sponsors. What's the take in regards to that? Because now that is yet a relationship that is being built in campus, but based on money. I think people want quick money. The young generation wants quick money. So that you can floss on Instagram, Facebook, your statuses. You can afford the things that you yourself have not worked for. And let me tell you one thing. Money that is not yours, you will spend it the way that you want. But you will have so much respect for money that you've worked for. And you've earned. Wow. But here we have campus chick that wants it easy. They want their rents to be paid. Money cures, saloon, pedikure. And when you tell such a person you're working, they'll be wondering what's the job and how much money is being paid. Why are you working? What will you tell that lady who is interested in a sponsor or who has a sponsor that is interested in her? Who is watching you today? Work hard. Work hard. Easy money goes. But whatever you've earned, whatever you've worked hard for, you will respect that money. You won't go and buy lunch or buy clothes or buy shoes. Do your nails. You'll invest. You'll invest so that that money gets to multiply. What's the problem with men in this particular scenario? Men feel like they can, for some, they feel like they can buy love. Let me take you out.  That woman owes you something. If she doesn't bring back or return the investment you've given, you've given out, you feel like you own her. Even if it's a sponsor to call such kind of people men, because those are literally boys. Why? Because it is a real man who will do things just because it's their love language. They enjoy doing it. But a person who is doing things that is not even dating in the first place, that will be trading. Because at the end of the day you are just showcasing who you are. And you realize that most of these people, they use that one as a cover-up from the reality they are supposed to face. But they are not facing it. So they fear commitment. This lady is not yet dating. I don't know if I agree with what he said. Yes, I agree. But we have a lady who is not dating. But umekubali kupeli kwa out. This guy has used money. So when he wants something and you say no, you don't want that. And he reminds you, nimi kupeli kwa out, nimi kunuri amangu, nimi kulipia rents, nimi kubahiasi nimi, for some, hata magari. Is that the way to go? Is it a problem of the men or the women? It is the problem of the women. Because we want simple things. We feel good. We want to be bought for cars. We want to be bought for flowers. Go make your hair. Your rent is paid. But you have to pay. You have to pay for that money. There is someone who says that if someone spends money on you, they have bought you. That you should return. I don't really think so. Yes, you will return if it's an agreement. I feel as if men feel so obliged. Niki kulunulia kitu, niki kufaniya kitu, you have to come and do something about it. But it shouldn't be the case. And the problem that we do as women is tell the men what we want. Don't tell a man what you want. Because you're giving that man a leeway to your heart. Yes, you're giving that man a leeway to your heart. But then what do you expect? You've accepted my advances. You've accepted my gifts. Like you see what happens in the first place, the foundation of the relationship is what matters. As much as you cannot just meet somebody on the way and you just buy them. So it means that even today no one will just start a relationship with you. They started with you long time ago. And no one can break up with you instantly. They started it long time ago. Most of the ladies, especially ladies, they tend to be blinded by even the red roses tend to blind them to see the red flags. Because they tend to be so much excited. And you realize that the men of such kind they will tend to excite your flesh as a lady. Because I will come and I really know what you want. But I will not provide what you need.  So if I've realized that what excites you more is about cars, I will do anything and everything. And that is where we do wrong telling a man what you want. When I come and tell Mr. Alan maybe he wants to cut me and I tell him I love being brought for roses. I love chocolates. I love vacations. I have already given him a leeway to my heart. Men are hunters. But then how can you avoid that yet someone has asked you tell me something about yourself. What do you like? But you can avoid the question by saying I love a man who is responsible. I love a man who respects ladies. I love that. You have to be smart. You have to be smart. I agree with what she is saying because Fritz leaves a parcel like it's an interview setup. No one will give you the leakage that these are the questions you should be asked. So they just let you come in blank as you are so that you can start from there. Those are tips for the ladies in the room. If a man asks you, tell me what you like. Don't tell them I like chocolates. I like a man who is responsible. Respect the man. The woman. Because let me tell you Ram the next two weeks that man will bring the chocolates. He will take you to trips. He will do whatever he will pay your rent because he knows that is what you want. No, no, not really. I am just saying in a relationship setup if you want a serious man so that this person gets a man is a hunter and I repeat. So that person does not know what you want. He will keep buying doing this and that and that. But there are some men who bought you and still I keep emphasizing on this that there are some men once they bought you gifts they will want you to pay back. And of course mostly it's sexual. But you see Ram honestly, like for men it's a serious work psychologically a man who does serious about a lady in the first days I will do everything and anything to impress this lady materially. You get. That's when I'll be so much quick even to apply her to any destination she want. One question for both of you does money make or break relationships? It can be two ways depending on the foundation of the relationship. It can be two ways. Yes, it can make the relationship or it can break the relationship. There's a time maybe in a relationship and you feel as if the woman is earning more than the man. And this is where I say where the finances the devil comes to kill still and destroy. So you need to be smart. Amen. You need to be careful. You need to be careful. Now still this is in this time where you are not yet dating before you start dating. Now we have scenarios where you've met a guy or you've met a lady and you've got an interest in them. Now they have accepted to take you out or you have decided to take them out. In this particular scenario you realize many people want to make many observations, conclusions and analysis to find out how is this person going to handle me when we are out. Will they pay the bills? This is before you start dating. Will they pay the bills? After dating will he get me a carb home? Ways to establish the financial stability and responsibility of a man or woman. Is that how it ought to be? Still on your list and then I'll come to you Lawrence. I feel as a lady it feels good when you go out this man takes responsibility. He he doesn't even matter about paying for the carb but you are the one who called me for the date. So you are the one who called me for the date. Whoever calls Is it the first date? Is it the first date? You've not started dating. I think you want to cut me. It's the first time you're meeting. So you want to cut me. It feels good when a man wants to pay the bill and you are okay to check on you if everything is fine. Take for your carb and go home. That is for the first. I don't mean it's the responsibility of a man to do that. But since that is the first date. Powerful. Lawrence, yes. For me what happens in the first date? Psychologically it's a man it's not about even the thing the bill. It's about increasing the responsibility because ladies get attracted to potential. Show casing the responsibility. So paying bills isn't about who has money but it's about who is responsible. It's about responsibility basically because at the end of the day is this person because I'm committing for this relationship I will do anything and everything to ensure that it works and that I'm paying the bill to impress the lady. No, I'm doing this to show it's just like the way people pay dowari. Alright. I want to give yet more examples. Loans. Some guys take loans to impress the woman. Woman a date and now you are taking loan alone. Both of you deal with issues to do with finance. Is it advisable to take a loan because of a date? It is never that serious. Why take a loan to impress someone? There are good loans and there are bad loans. Take a loan to invest but don't take a loan to take someone out. If stay in your capacity if kama uneza toshiau when the two up at town chickening take that lady there because that is where your capacity is. Then you can't why are you going for an expensive person then if you can't afford. Why? Stick to your lane. Stick to your lane. Love is blind. But dating is an eye opener. You see love. Dating is an eye opener. I wish we had an audience here. Love is blind. But dating is an eye opener. Because during the dating that is the point whereby you get to understand this person you get to interact. If I'm going to take a loan to impress this person it means that this person is way above me I cannot sustain me. So it's not what the hassle. So better for you just do whatever it is within your means. That is why I said I'm not serious. There is my level. Accept me the way I am. Because in this lady water lady will see it's about the potential. How I take care of her. How I treat her. You know about taking her to a posh place. I can take her to that posh place. But my manners and the way we relate with her is not that palatable to her. I want us to touch on now a different side now. We said before dating. Let's get to now the dating process. The man is involved here. I want you to engage with us. Keep talking to us. That's why it's part of the show. I keep on saying why in the morning why in the morning also. That's why it's part of the show. Ram Aguko. Let us know where you're watching us from. Ask your questions. Give your thoughts in regards to this particular conversation. Let's talk about during dating. Now you're dating and it's official that both of you are maybe thinking of getting married. Or you're already married. Should couples get to do businesses and investments together? Yes. 3 I'd advise couples to have 3 banks accounts. 4 actually 4 bank accounts. 4? Yes 4. A joint bank account savings account and now the two are the personal accounts. The joint account make sure this is the money that gets to pay the bills in the houses and whatever you need.  This is your personal money. No one needs to ask you what to do with your personal money. So is it wrong for the women to ask their husbands it is not wrong but I'm just saying it feels good when you do something for yourself. But I can come and tell you chip in to maybe buying a car. I have 800. I need 400,000 more. It feels good even you as a man it feels good. You take. People should because we are working as a team whereby openness comes in place. The moment we understand that this is our financial capability we will be able to invest together the way she is saying we have a saving account whereby projects and water view then that point whereby it reaches to that point as much as these ladies whether they look good there is nothing as sweet as a man's money they will tell you it is true because we say if it's not working for me it's going somewhere else so a man however even if this man will give her 100 shillings it feels so good it makes her world so she feels loved and cared for exactly so she feels loved and cared for exactly now still on investments should you spend money on each other investing on each other let me give an example and of course this one we have so many ways of investing in terms of money in terms of business ideas education should couples invest in each other in such a manner because you only have a store where you invest Mr. Wisuzi from this house yes these two guys you only have a store where you invest exactly so if this person for instance if you invest so much in your woman believe me you will also feel so nice you know as much as you are growing you are also responsible there is someone who is accountable to you and it feels so nice and it's a good thing actually to invest in teacher now there is a particular scenario of a man who invested in a woman took her to school gave her a sense of education got her a job now she is well off and she is no longer interested in the guy I'm talking to her the lady is like I mean in some issues he can buy I know you've heard of such a scenario a man has invested all his money in a woman only for the woman to say no and this is where you get cases where the woman was killed I don't know what happened because it feels bad when you invest in something and then mada rau in a kuja a kufaikuana mada rau invest in each other and that's why it is investing in each other not you invest in me and me I don't invest in you what about scenarios where you've seen couples who have invested in each other to the point that one now goes above the other let me give an example and of course I'm sorry but it is also based on the number of cases that I've also heard and based on the research that I've done and the finalists that I've realized we've seen ladies who have been a man who has invested in a woman now the kind of job the man has of course isn't earning much but now because he invested in the woman the woman got a good job with a good salary and now she's moving and rolling with the high class people she now feels as though I need a better man that's why I always say never commit or date a lady or a man who has not even tested money because you don't know their character but how can you test money and become a humble background you see there is a way that is why you need to see the character of this person when they have money and when they don't have money because the way this person will react even if they have a thousand bob is the same way they will react when they have a million so you have to test this person even for that case whereby you are saying you have taken someone to school and this person changes nobody changes overnight they started way back but you choose to ignore the red flags so it reaches to that point whereby that's why I began by saying people need to date intentionally and ask serious questions and do proper projections 5 years from now this person ask yourself what if but you realize today people get to dates the things they discuss nothing because all about the trending things but matters to do investment they don't and especially guys we don't open up we don't open up and this is your future remember and if you are looking at spending the rest of your life with this person you have to ensure this kind of conversation should couples make financial planning together financial plans together of course this can be yearly monthly plans but based on finances yes they should but now here you have a problem a man does not disclose his salary that is where the problem is that is now where the problem is and this is now I throw him back to the ladies because a man who is not opening up about their finances they say Ujama excites financially and every man can spend on you and every man can open can open up to you it's you now because women are so powerful these people they are very powerful they can make you open up but the problem now here is about the lady if I am not opening up she has not excited me well okay so Allah you are saying the reason why a man hasn't disclosed his financial information is because the woman has not triggered the interest exactly and then are we even dating or is it before dating we are dating so whereby now you have to be my self space today you know what I am broke next year next year we want you to be our self space there is an importance of having the bank account that is where I will get what you earn yes you will have to get money for the joint venture you will have to get money for the savings you will have to get your personal money you know this man he is a joint he is a joint but how did you come up but you know for as long as we put money in the joint and in the savings now there is a personal that's why I said this personal money and this personal money I can't ask you what you are doing but that doesn't mean we splurge money everywhere you are interested in finding out how much he earns oh yes I will yes I will for security reasons for security reasons it's good but you know in the dating setup it's a bit hard because you don't know who this person is at the end of the day if you are dating you don't do it you should not unless you are not serious just you want to excite the place of this person but if you are serious about it this person will find out they will definitely find out so if you are dating don't disclose unless you are married unless you are married unless you are married unless you are married just know about his vision what have you so the married ought to disclose information ATM bank pins not necessarily it will just come automatically there is no day you will be like you know there are couples who know each other's pins that's okay but it's not a must you just find yourself because if this person is your best friend they are not your fan they are your best friend what are you hiding what about investments that are personal we have seen people who have gotten into problems because of this particular scenario where this guy has some land he has a shamba he has a shamba he has a shamba and this guy made an investment somewhere and the family is not aware and I have seen this also happen on the ground it becomes so bad because the family isn't aware that the man has some piece of land unfortunately if the man passes on rapalatu kuna shamba things are growing and no one knows who owns that piece of land I think that is selfishness it's being selfish and I am in real estate my main agenda is settling Kenyans and I get so many cases like that you do real estate yes I am in real estate and I get people who want to buy property now whata kibibi the husband or the wife to know that they want it to be a secret I think that is being very selfish because okikufa ita sa idea nani ita enda wa api then what was the essence of buying if you won't share with your partner you know you are going to die obviously but I think I am going to die but I think I am going to die but I think I am going to die but at least I am going to be with mama because that is being selfish there is a lot of insecurity there because you look at that relationship if it happens there is something the man knows or the woman knows but they are not willing to open up they have seen 5 years from now Naibia paku takalika? Naibia paku takalika? So you cannot force a client to put the wife and maybe they have a problem. Today you have the right to advise this client. Because you cannot tell them, when they are sitting opposite at Trafadali, please, eka bibi ya kwa. First of all, if there are children involved, eka bibi ya kwa. It might not even help your wife, but this property might help your children. You have to have a safe space in your husband or your wife. You have to feel safe with these people to get to even open up and tell them nimenunua shamba. This is not for you. Kamu utaki sa idea bibi. Muambia, this is not for you. This is for my children. This is for my children. Na akundo shida ina kwa. Yuko api ya ngo basi, kama yun ya watoto. Ina manisha kuna shida. Kuna. There is a problem in the family. That these people are not opening up. Yes. What? There is a problem. Like the way you hear gossip, they be like, don't tell Ram. So you tell Ram and Ram knows that you know what, don't tell so and so. So everyone knows, don't tell so and so. So it's a secret, but it's no longer a secret. Because everyone is not telling the other. Everyone is telling the other not to tell the other. Yeah, and the other not to tell the other. Relation is a complicated. All right. Still during dating or marriage in terms of investments, you want to do something called, you want to start a business. How should couples handle a scenario where one partner wants to start a business and you know, maybe need support from the other partner? Mucho agreement and let's have this conversation because I like the way you are saying, a couple. And if they are working as a team, the dream will work. But if this person comes with their interest and this comes with their interest, we cannot work because house divided can never materialize to anything. But if these two can come and be like, you know what, we are doing this for us, not for any other person. Like the effort and the input would be mucho. Understanding that we are growing as a family. In some cases, you realize one partner doesn't support the business. But who you, an attacker. Mostly in a scenario where the man is not interested. He doesn't want the woman to do a particular business. But the woman wants that business. How do you handle it? Because that is also a form of investment. Before she comes in, you see like what happens, it is a commitment. And remember, once you are committed into this relationship, it's no longer you, it is us. So there are some things you will have to compromise for the sake of the relationship. You cannot just say the standard up there that there is no place you can meet. So you need to enter into, like for instance as a man, I need to enter into her world and see what makes her happy. And I will ensure that I do that and she will also enter into my world and see what makes me happy and she will be able to do it. So it is a question of do we understand the dynamics of each other and how can we like disagree to agree. Agree with what he says. And also there are so many scenarios whereby I want to do something but I do not have the finances but I want my husband to finance. And as you've said, maybe the husband does not want to finance. As he said, there has to be a mutual agreement and you have to take a risk. Take a risk on your wife, take a risk on your girlfriend. The people who are investing and they are not yet married, take a risk. Maybe that risk is the opening factor to your relationship. So take a risk.  And maybe you go try and the business does not work. Try again. Because now if the business does not work then one partner will say but I told you.  I wasted money. Yes, they will use the way. I wasted money because you insisted. That's an honor. I think just take a risk again. And that's why you go to fight. Not everything works in the first trial. You have to try. You have to keep trying.  So take a risk on your wife, give her that money. If the business does not work, sit down. Look at what and what you did wrong. What and what you can improve. Risk again. Take responsibility. And this goes to all the men out there. Are you interested in taking a risk on your wife? Can you do so? I think you should. Can you invest in your wife? I think you should.  Because I've talked about many cases where the husband ants more. What about when the woman ants more? The woman is on who has the power to make things run in the house. She ants more. Maybe the husband isn't working. But one day that becomes a problem. How do you deal with that? As a man in the first place you need to be secure enough. You need to be secure enough and you be like let this woman be your self space. And that one does not mean you as a man. We are working as a team remember. And for a lady if you have an opportunity to be financially stable than him. Does not negate that he is a man in your life. Does not make him less of a man. But for some women they start making all the decisions alone. In the first place she didn't mean well for this man. In the first place because if you really mean well you will give him hope. Because remember I said that ladies will only see the potential in a man. And a serious lady will actualize the potential of this man to become the real man they want. They be like you know what today you are down. What can we really do so that you can progress forward. But a person who is not serious about you can say those are just sliquins who will be like you know what if he is not earning much remember it will not love now and commitment that brought you here. We are choosing violence. Just sliquins. Because you are just interested after what this man can offer. So you are just a friend to this person. You are not his friend. Because if truly we have been friends no matter what comes we will still remain intact. So why today around if something happens and I no longer talk to you and I choose violence it means that I was not a friend I was just an enemy waiting for an opportunity. So in that scenario this was just the lady trying to look for a perfect opportunity so that her true character can manifest. So she was just you know just hiding herself under the mascara under water. And he is choosing violence and I know what of you. That's why they will throw you down. Your view a woman who is earning more than the man. I think even in the Bible it says for better for worse. And so that you get to even get married you need to respect your husband regardless of his financial status. Allow me to cut a tishote I need to take a break and after that break I want us to come back but after this break I want us to touch on very very fundamental things when does and when did it start that my money is our money and your money is your money when does that keep engaging with us that is part of the show on Twitter at Ramago at White if I was China it's all about relationships money and investments this is power talk Y254 Imagine It is a pleasure being with you welcome back this is power talk my name is Ram Aguko it is a pleasure being with you and I'm seeing so many people on our social media handle this is Kevin and so much enjoying the show thank you so much everybody who has left in the comments thank you for letting us know why you watching us from keep engaging with us the hashtag is power talk show at Ram Aguko at White 254 channel is where you can be engaged with us remember we are also live on our website at www.kbc.co.ke 4th Lush White 254 so you can follow us online from wherever you are watching us from today we are talking about issues with money relationships money and investments now before we went on that particular break we were talking about when the woman aunts more than the man and I want to bring in a particular scenario whereby the woman has seemingly is not happy with some of the financial decisions of the man how should this particular conversation go whereby the woman is disappointed at the financial decisions of the man but at the same time know that this woman is earning more and this particular individual who is the man Ruth please don't keep quiet go talk to your man tell him what and what you're not agreeing with what you think you need to change regardless of your earning more or your not you won't feel it embedded I don't think I made you who you are I am done I am done I am done I am done I am done I am done I am done I am done I am done I have done a bad financial decision but the first word is I have done and then you put to the table what you want to say you always say in the Bible respect your man Respekt him first Then after you respect him, tell him now what you want him to hear It's not about conflict, it's not about arguments Don't argue, you need to understand each other Have a conversation and have an understanding And that's when you'll get to air out what your problem is For me is the way she's saying First of all, connect with this man Then correct him Because remember, man we have a fragile ego You try anything to see me even to Suggesting that you're putting me down I will rebel and I will do even worse But if you connect with me You'll be like, why are you doing this Try to understand from my point of view Then bring like a suggestion The problem ladies face when trying to pass a message to a man They'll be like you should, you know That one puts a man down But the moment you suggest to him And let it be like it is coming from him That you know what for the betterment of this relationship Supposing you did things this way He'll be like okay, so he will be able to connect Now we're in a restaurant The man doesn't have money so he can't pay the bills But we are in a restaurant And of course is the woman who should pay the bills How do you handle this particular scenario As a woman After taking the meal Just tell him you'll pay the bill You don't have to tell him What he is paying No, just tell him Today I'll sort out the bill Today I'll take care of the bill This is a couple Okay, depending on how the man operates But I'll feel like You know also it can If you think that this man doesn't have money And we're getting to the restaurant Supposing you did it before When they're like it's for you Or give him the money to pay Give him the money to pay He will feel he owns the place Or don't you think he'll compare He won't feel intimidated Okay, you just do it in a nice way Depending on how he is So I feel if it comes from him It'd be like on this place It'd be like you know what Okay, okay Nice tips I hope you're learning something from home Now I want us to talk about Breakups now And here we're looking into money Relationships Investments And breakups You've invested in each other for so long And here is a scenario where you have to What happens to Everything that You are invested in The property You bought this lady A restaurant Or started a business You called it Ram restaurant Or for example This is Ruth Ram My goodness Now we are chana Because No one will break up with you They broke up with you Like even three years ago And especially for men Everybody will agree with me A man knows the direction The relationship will go So however But I literally know that it's not going anywhere So the sustainability Of our relationship is fully dependent On a man If he is going to make it work It will work So for this scenario That's why I've said Let it be on the foundation of friendship You're saying that every relationship Depends on the man Depends on the man So if a relationship doesn't hold If people break up It's only the man Because believe me Do your research Do your research Every relationship That doesn't work It is the man who has the problem It's the man who doesn't want to make it work Do your research well Because let me tell you A lady by her own means She will do everything and anything To ensure that this relationship works But if a man is not into it No matter what you do As a lady It's not about both of them putting the efforts Just the man Just the man Even if the lady will be like I agree now I hadn't agreed before Because you're a lady Let me choose Now I know Ask every man Who has broken up with a lady They'll be like Even immediately they saw this lady They knew where we were going Because there is nothing Either you are fully into this relationship Or you are not fully into it This thing whereby people say Let's try and see how it works Already that's a red flag It won't work Because a man knows this is a wife material I'll help you today Do you forget about it? I wish we had men in the I don't know They would tell me if they agree with it I don't want to work alone Do you agree that Every relationship that has not Worked out well Is because of the man We're saying all So anything that Now if they work out is because of the man So whether they work out or not The woman has nothing to do with The man can try But the man, the responsibility Lies fully on the man Ruth, you take in regards to that As you tell us a lot In this type of investment After Miachana, there are two types of couples There's one whereby the man will say Because you have my children Just take everything And that will cater for my children And maybe there's another Maybe relationship where you do not have Children yet And maybe you will split 50-50 Because each and every person invested Into that business So it's either The man gets to tell you You take the investment And let's part ways Or we are not friends Or In the next scenario 50-50 What you've invested And go with what I've invested What about the name Of the restaurant Should you change it Should you retain it Ram and Ruth hotel Or something And now Ram is not there But is now Ruth and Alan I think there's a relationship whereby Maybe Mekosana And you don't want to see each other And maybe there's another one Maybe it's an agreement So in that scenario If you're good friends It can still stay Ram and Ruth It's just a name What about Now Ram and Ruth are no longer there Is not Ruth and Alan Now Alan has a problem With the name of this restaurant Because the name is attached To your ex You change it Okay Like I agree with her whereby Now it depends But majorly if It will just romance that brought you together That is when people can split And you decide everything We have to split But if there is a greater goal you are fulfilling Believe me the business can continue And still be friends Because that's why people make This mistake That's when they start building friendship It should be friendship then we begin dating So the moment the friendship is there It is the relationship that didn't work The romance part of it didn't work It doesn't mean that we cannot continue Being friends as business partners Where by whatever we do It's purely business Because I've seen people who are exes And whatever they are doing It is so good And they are progressing And they are secure enough To mention each other names At every point there is an opportunity So it reaches to that point whereby Are you mature enough To sustain this relationship To sustain the friendship and to sustain the business So it is an aspect of also maturity And you are understanding Because some people Whenever things go sour They will come and split everything It becomes miss And that's where kids now Get affected And there was a bill That was passed in parliament This week That also touches on that You can tell us what you think about this particular bill Kama kwa nampangwa Kwa nampangwa kando Kwa nampangwa kanda Kwa nampangwa kanda What happens in the case of death Who should benefit from The resources Of the finances of demand Of which we know That it should be the Not legitimate I'm looking for the term But the legally wedded wife Toto wakesasa Not a benefit Where by now I think it has captured That a point whereby If this person has a child And they are not married It's the lady who will benefit I think for me I look at it in a positive way It will make people be responsible enough With their actions Because it reached a point whereby It looked as if being a baby mama Especially Nairobi is one of a very well paying job You will see the demands people will put In place then you wonder So it means That people need to work People need to be responsible enough For their actions And everything they are going to get Involved So it gives people responsibility You have taken that? It is a good bill for responsibility as well I want us to touch on Now Other scenarios now We talk about before, during and after Now There are some cases that Of course Go cut across Whether it's before, during or after Let me give an example Let's say you're married and you have kids And your kids want you to buy them Gifts And your partner is not aware That you are going to buy these particular gifts How do you handle that particular scenario?  I think this is where Budgeting comes in You need to budget for your money And budgeting helps you to know What is coming in and what is going out And if it gets to a point That you are using more than you are earning There is a problem There has to be a cash fuel That's where I think The rich are There's more coming in that What is going out So you need to budget Children are very understanding I'll buy for you next month And make sure in the next month You've budgeted for whatever you wanted to buy Yes Another scenario that also cuts across Before that Do you have an input on that particular issue? I agree We need to budget Because to some extent You might be doing that And your partner will feel like You are doing this to win children's loyalty So you have to be very careful You've mentioned budgeting Should couples Divide Roles In terms of Money and budgeting We couples can say That it is my responsibility To pay rent And your responsibility To pay school fees And it is my responsibility to do X Your responsibility to do Y So if You look at the expenses Of the house That divided Those that are mine Those that are yours Is that an advisable way to go Is that the best way That couples should be able to go for I believe people to some extent They don't plan It comes naturally If people are understanding enough They'll feel like Especially for a lady They'll feel like my husband is doing enough And I think I can step in So that we can grow together But here now comes a challenge Ensure that whatever you are doing Let it come as a point of You agreeing That you know what Do not just push it Push it to her Let it be like Let it come especially for a lady Like she comes and tells you That you know what my husband I'm going to be paying school fees And what have you So all those kinds of things That's what I'm saying Is that the way That you say Yungu ta kwa kulipa school fees Yungu ni yungu Naturally a man needs to To take full responsibility of Everything Let's say you are saying I'm going to pay fees What is the man's input Also there So I think mutual agreement Mutual agreement Agree It has to be a mutual agreement And also when you have Now the bank accounts the joint venture That is where you get the money to pay your expenses So Apu I don't think you know Who has done this Who has done that So su kapul should not divide roles I don't think they should divide roles And also in the couples There is always that one person who Is really good on budgeting Budgeting is not a gender role It depends with the person who is best at it It might be the husband It might be the wife So the one who is much better On budgeting That person to that job So it means when you are about to choose your partner You really choose well Yeah exactly I want us to touch on this As we bring it to a close My money, your money, our money Where to Where we draw the line My money, your money, our money It depends with the culture That people have created You realize that even those people Who make noise on social media And all those places That you know It is his money It is our money You realize those people They support their husbands At the end of the day So it is a culture I believe it varies from Each family to each family It's a family culture That has been created It's a joint account So it's just that culture That we've created My money, your money, our money My money, your money is our money I think it's because People ask women Now I'm on the women part We tend to think If this person Is not using the money On us That money is going somewhere else And that's why you tend to see And my money is your money I said it wrong Your money is our money But my money is my money Yes, that is our money Which should not be the case That should not be the case I want us to wrap it up With this particular quote And I don't know if it will come up On your screen You will tell me if you agree with it My goodness This is the thing Invest in people who invest in you Invest in people who invest in you For me, I think I'll look at it From this side Where by It is a mutual coexistence And Do things because It's human And it is your nature Not because you have to benefit from this person So you should not only be kind To people who are kind to you And especially that is a point Whereby your personality And your true integrity is put to test Whereby can you do things To people who you cannot Expect anything in return Invest in people who invest in you About Do things willingly Don't invest so that And wait for him to invest in you Do it with a clean heart Do it with a clean heart So invest in that person Not expecting that person to invest in you But for as long as you've done your part It gives you a Very good satisfaction It makes you get very satisfied But yes, I also agree In one way or another Somebody who has also invested in you Even that other person needs to show efforts But then I'm wondering Will you start weighing out Who has invested in me most And who has not invested in you Okay, anyway I'm told we should wrap it up That's just the end of today's morning conversation This is power talk, as always a big thank you to You, thank you so much for being part of today's show Big thanks to Alan Thank you so much my brother Ruth, thank you so much It was a pleasure I should bring you back again This show airs again tonight At 10 p.m. My name is Ram Aguko This is power talk


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Hi friends, welcome back to my channel and welcome if you're new here. My name is Jen. I'm a certified weight loss and nutrition coach and I'm on the WW or the Weight Watchers Blue Plan. Happy Wednesday. It's Wednesday, so it's another what I eat in a day. We have kind of a low key day today. If you didn't know, Diesel just had major surgery. He had a completely torn ACL and a torn meniscus. So he had surgery just a couple of days ago. So we're kind of lying low around the house but I do have some fun things to share with you today as well as some really good food. I'll give you an update on Diesel and I have a delicious dinner recipe.  And if you're new or you haven't yet subscribed, I'd love to have you here. Hit the subscribe button and click the bell next to it so you never miss a single video. Down in that description box, you will find nutrition coaching where I do offer personalized to you macros and calories. Highly recommend taking advantage of this so you know how many calories and macros you should be eating every day on WW or not to reach your goals. If you wanna chat with me directly, I offer one-on-one coaching as well. Links, discounts to everything I shared with you today as well as all of my favorite things are down in that description box along with my Facebook group. Head on over and join us. We have almost 19,000 members and it's a great place to be. So come on over and join us. So let's jump into what I eat in a day to lose weight on WW. I'm having two of my cheesy hash brown bacon egg cups that I prepped in Monday's meal prep. If you haven't seen meal prep, definitely check it out. The recipes were so good, these included. So these are three points apiece. I'm having two of those and then we had a little get-together yesterday for the 4th of July and I made this little fruit salad with apples, papaya, cherries and pineapple and we had some left over so I'm gonna have a little bit of that. So my breakfast is six points. Well, good morning. I thought that I would eat breakfast with you guys this morning. I wanted to give you guys an update on Diesel. He had his surgery on Friday so I'm gonna give you guys an update right after this clip of like how he's doing since he had his surgery, exactly what they found when they did the x-rays and how we've been coping since. Like I mentioned, we had a little get-together with some friends last night for the 4th of July which was really nice. It was nice to hang out with some friends and take our mind off of Diesel's recovery a little bit. I haven't been tracking my food. It's just honestly not been a priority for me. I'm so busy taking care of Diesel and with that comes the fact that I'm really not eating a lot right now only because I'm so busy with Diesel that I just, number one, I'm not hungry because it's stressful and it takes up a lot of time and it's hard and I'm worried about him. So I'm definitely not overeating if anything, I'm not quite eating enough. So I'm making sure that starting today, I am eating all of my calories. I wanna make sure that I don't under eat even if it's for a short period of time. I wanna keep my metabolism stoked and revved. So I'm making sure that I'm going to get in enough calories today. So I'm going to be sharing points versus calories again with you guys today. You're going to see how many calories I eat to reach my goal which is between 1800 and about 2100 calories and what that equates to as points. I do get 32 points in a day. Generally if I eat all my calories I go over those 32 points. So we'll kind of see how today plays out. It's going to be kind of a low key day just because we don't have a whole lot going on with Diesel's recovery but I thought it would still be fun for you guys to join us today. So I'm gonna go ahead and give you an update on Diesel and then I'm gonna take my supplements for the day and we'll get going with the rest of our day. Hi buddy. Let's give our friends an update on your surgery. So he had his surgery on Friday. It's currently Sunday. So we're about two days post-op. You can see that they had to shave a good part of his back leg and then this is the knee. He ended up having a completely torn ACL and a torn meniscus. So it was quite an extensive surgery. Poor guy. He hobbles around pretty good on three legs. He doesn't necessarily like it so we have to be super careful. There's a plastic shield that we have to tie on his leg if he goes outside and the grass is still wet because the cast can't get wet at all. So the easiest way to move him around is for us to keep him on his dog bed here and then we can literally just pull his dog bed around our floors. You can see we don't have any carpet which is good because we can slide the dog bed easy but not good because Diesel has a hard time not slipping and sliding on the carpet and he can't do any damage to that leg at all.  So two days post-op he's doing pretty well. What we've been doing is when the grass dries because his cast can't get wet at all. When the grass dries we've been taking him outside and letting him lay out by the tree. So that's my plan later today. He's heavy, he's about 120 pounds. I cannot move him by myself. So it's been a little bit of a struggle. He's still not really eating. He's drinking water but he's not really eating anything. He takes a ton of medication. These are all of his pills. I mean, some of these pills are huge. Most of these he takes two or three twice a day. So generally it's about 13 pills two times a day and he doesn't take pills well. So we've been having to just toss them to the back of his throat which is not fun at all. But he's doing okay. So I just wanted to give you guys a quick update on how he was doing. I just finished my breakfast. I'm going to take my supplements. You guys always ask what vitamins and supplements I take. So in the morning, first thing I do as I'm getting ready for the day, you know brushing my teeth, being my skincare, I always take a gummy adult vitamin and a gummy hair, skin and nail vitamin. And then once I eat, I take my Thrive probiotics. These are my personal probiotics from Thrive Gut Health. You guys know I'm big into gut health because it plays such a big part in just how we feel overall every day but also how our body does with weight loss. Gut health can hinder your weight loss. So I took the Thrive Gut Health test a couple of months ago, I guess maybe three or four months ago now and I've been taking my personal probiotic sense. So what you do is you submit your sample for the Gut Health test.  So these are my personal probiotics. I take them, Troy takes them. We've been taking them daily now for months and we have seen a drastic, drastic difference in just how we feel overall and how healthy our guts are. I take these every single day with food or basically after either breakfast or lunch. This Gut Health, the Thrive Gut Health test is 50% off. I will link it down below for you guys. Highly recommend. If you struggle with any ailments that could be related to your Gut Health, this test will tell you exactly where you're deficient and formulate and curate a personal probiotic to get you up to the levels that you need to be. I have never felt better since taking these and that goes for Troy as well. He was quite the skeptic and we've already ordered him a second three months supply so he's no longer a skeptic. So highly, highly recommend the Thrive Gut Health test. The other supplement that I take every day is the My Adventure to Fit Greens. Now I am pretty good about eating my greens and getting my greens in but I do supplement them every single day with the My Adventure to Fit Greens. This is the banana apple flavor. I can never remember the flavor. These are really, really good. They taste good. They kind of taste like sour candy. You can mix these in a smoothie, mix them in water or just dry scoop them where you just put the scoop into your mouth. That's generally what I do. Be careful with that.  So I take these every day after breakfast. So here is what the scoop looks like. I generally will put a tiny bit of water in my mouth, pop in the greens, more water, swish, swallow. And like I said, they taste really good and I just feel good about making sure that I'm getting in my greens every single day. Now they were running a buy one, get one half off promotion for the 4th of July. I don't know if that's still going on but they're affordable. I will go ahead and link the My Adventure to Fit down below and I do have a 10% off discount for you as well.  So I'm going to have a quick morning snack. I'm gonna do a hum kombucha. Now this I picked up in my grocery haul at Costco. They're having a great sale on the hum. This mango passion fruit is so delicious. WWCounts, this is three points. I count this as one point and then I'm having a peach to good yogurt just to get in some protein. I'm not super, super hungry. So I think the kombucha and the yogurt will be a perfect morning snack. Look at how cute this is. Palmer dug at the dog bed to make the perfect spot and he's laying there with his big brother. He has been really good with diesel and so has Lola. Say hi baby girl. She's been really good. She knows he doesn't feel good. She's very in tuned with what's going on. So she's kind of steer clear of him, which is good so that he can rest. But I decided to show you guys how cute it is that Palmer is cuddled up with him on his dog bed. So here's my lunch for today. I'm doing my meal prep, my pineapple fried rice. This recipe is incredible. I actually ate this for lunch yesterday before we did our little Fourth of July barbecue because I was super hungry and I didn't think I could quite make it to dinner. This is absolutely incredible. It is super low point, but it's pretty high in calories which is great because that way you're able to reach your calorie goal a bit easier on WW when you utilize foods like this that have quite a bit of zero point foods in them. It is so good and so, so filling. So this is going to be my lunch. I'm still working on my gallon of water and I'll be back a little bit later to share with you my afternoon snack. Diesel's outside on the dog bed. So this little nugget took his indoor recovery bed. It's about three o'clock. I'm going to have an afternoon snack. I'm a little hungry, not starving, but I'm a little hungry and I'm not sure exactly what time Troy will be home and then I'm gonna have to leave to go upload a video. So I think I'm gonna do just a light snack. I'm feeling like something sweet, savory, kind of a little bit of a mix with a little bit of a crunch. I'm currently in pantry like scavenging what I want. Do I want some of these coconut rolls? Do I want some of my almonds? Do I want a utopia snack? Okay, I decided I'm gonna have some of my wasabi and soy sauce, blue diamond almonds. I'm just gonna have four points worth of these and that'll satisfy that crunch but it'll also keep me full until dinner because these have some really good healthy fats. I love these so, so much. So I'm just gonna weigh out four points worth on my food scale. For dinner tonight, I'm making cheese burger crunch wraps. These sound absolutely delicious. It is a very summery barbecue cookout type of recipe. We're just going to pair this with some leftover cut up fruit from last night, the same fruit I had for breakfast this morning. So let me show you what's in our recipe. First you're going to need a pound of 96% extra lean ground beef, whatever burger toppings you would like. I have some tomato, lettuce and red onion leftover from last night's barbecue, some Velveeta sliced cheese, whatever tortillas you would like to use. I wanna use these up. These are the flat out Italian herb. I think these are gonna be perfect for this recipe. My seasoning of choice for burgers is the Trader Joe's barbecue rub with coffee. It is delicious on burgers. And then I just have some yellow mustard and no sugar added ketchup. So the first thing I'm going to do is take my 96% extra lean ground beef, one pound and I'm going to divide it into four equal patties. Add them here to my non-stick skillet. So I'm going to just season my burgers with that Trader Joe's rub and then when I do flip them, I will add some seasoning to the other side as well. It's literally our favorite rub ever for burgers. It is so delicious. I'm going to pop this on the stove top and get these burgers fried up. So my burgers are frying up. I went ahead and pulled out some leftover cooked bacon from last night's barbecue as well so that we can have that in our crunch wrap. This is going to be so delicious. So once these burgers get cooked up, we'll remove these from the pan and we'll start assembling the crunch wraps. So our burgers are done. I'm going to go ahead and remove the pan from the heat. I'm going to use a clean pan to actually cook the crunch wrap. So for the crunch wraps, you can see that I just have a separate clean pan. I'm going to spray it with some non-stick cooking spray. I'm going to add my flat-out wrap directly to the pan but I'm going to kind of leave part of it hanging over to make it easier to fold. And then I'm going to go ahead and grab my burger patty and place it in the center. I mentioned we have some leftover bacon from our barbecue. So I'm going to place one slice of bacon in the center of my burger patty so you can see kind of how I'm assembling my wrap. And then I'm going to add one slice of my light Velveeta cheese but I'm actually going to tear it in half so the cheese goes a little more over the outside of the wrap. And you also have to add in any condiments or whatever you're putting in your wrap as well. I am not going to add in my ketchup and mustard. I'll just dip my wrap in that but I am putting in some red onion. I love red onion. And then I'm also going to, I don't know how this is going to work per the recipe. It says to add all your lettuce and everything to the middle. I'm hoping that that doesn't make it too soggy, the lettuce. So basically it looks like a deconstructed hamburger and then we're going to fold that edge that we left out over. And I'm going to kind of just press down and then we're going to cook this over medium heat until it's nice and crispy. I will spray this side as well before I flip it. Look at how gorgeous she is. I just flipped her over. I'm going to let her crisp up on the other side and then I'll be back to share points and calories. So here's my dinner for tonight. Doesn't this look absolutely delicious? Like I said, it's barbecue cookout, vibes for really low calorie and pretty low points for a big dinner. So here is what my crunch wrap looks like. So it is two points for the flat-out bread. You could use a one-point tortilla. Really anything would work for the vessel to put the hamburger in. My hamburger itself is four points. That is six. My cheese is one for seven and my piece of bacon is one for eight. So my crunch wrap is eight points. I have a little bit of that no sugar added ketchup and some mustard. And then like I mentioned, some of the leftover fruit from our barbecue. So this entire dinner is only eight points and it's really like going out for a burger, but better. Dinner update, that crunch wrap was delicious. Highly recommend not putting your lettuce in the wrap when you cook it. The lettuce definitely got soggy and warm. I ended up pulling it out. What I did realize is that you can still open up the crunch wrap once it's cooked and add in your lettuce, your tomato. I was fine putting the onions in there, but you can add everything at the end. You are definitely able to open up the crunch wrap. So pro tip if you're making that recipe. As you can see, I'm in my car. I ran quickly to Walmart to upload my meal prep. For tomorrow, I'm filming this video on Sunday and I always put meal prep out on Monday. So by the time you see this, that is up really, really good recipes.  So I met McDonald's doing that. I think when in Rome, I'm going to grab myself a small vanilla cone and that'll be my dessert for tonight. Everything that I'm eating for today, I'll wrap it up with that vanilla cone. I'm pretty full from dinner. It just sounds really good. It's a hundred degrees here. And like I said, when you're at McDonald's, you can't pass up picking up a vanilla cone. And also this is my last glass of water and my gallon will be done. This is three quarters of the way gone.  So that's going to wrap up this, what I eat in a day. On the next screen, I will put the points versus calories for you so that you can see exactly how many points I ate and how many calories I had today. Joining me on another, what I eat in a day to lose weight on WW. I hope you enjoyed coming along with me today, getting all of the diesel updates, all the delicious food that I ate. And of course that dinner recipe is on my recipe website, which is down in the description box along with nutrition coaching, links and discounts to everything I shared with you today and my Facebook group. Definitely check out that description box. If you enjoyed today's video, give it a big thumbs up. And if you're new or you haven't yet subscribed, of course I'd love to have you here. Hit the subscribe button and ring the bell next to it so you never miss a single video. Thank you so, so much for watching and I'll see you next time. Bye.