the lonely island
like a boss
Mr Samberg Thanks for coming to your performance review No problem So you're in charge around here, is that fair to say? Absolutely, I'm the boss Okay, so take us through a day in the life of the boss Well the first thing I do is... Talk to to corporate (like a boss) Approve memos (like a boss) Lead a workshop (like a boss) Remember birthdays (like a boss) Direct workflow (like a boss) My own bathroom (like a boss) Micromanage (like a boss) Promote Synergy (like a boss) Hit on Debra (like a boss) Get rejected (like a boss) Swallow sadness (like a boss) Send some faxes (like a boss) Call a sex line (like a boss) Cry deeply (like a boss) Demand a refund (like a boss) Eat a bagel (like a boss) Harassment lawsuit (like a boss) No promotion (like a boss) Fifth of vodka (like a boss) Shit on Debra's desk (like a boss) Buy a gun (like a boss) In my mouth (like a boss) Oh fuck man I can't fucking do it.. shit! Pussy out (like a boss) Puke on Debra's desk (like a boss) Jump out the window (like a boss) Suck a dude's dick (like a boss) Score some coke (like a boss) Crash my car (like a boss) Suck my own dick (like a boss) Eat some chicken strips (like a boss) Chop my balls off (like a boss) Black out in the sewer (like a boss) Meet a giant fish (like a boss) Fuck it's brains out (like a boss) Turn into a jet (like a boss) Bomb the Russians (like a boss) Crash into the sun (like a boss) Now I'm dead (like a boss) Uh huh So that's an average day for you then? No doubt You chop your balls off and die? Hell yeah And I think at one point there you said something about sucking your own dick Nope! Actually I'm pretty sure you did Nah, that ain't me Okay, well this has been eye opening for me I'm the boss Yeah, no I got that You said it about four-hundred times I'm the boss Yeah yeah I got it! I'm the boss No I heard you, see ya later LIKE A BOSS!