english: And it was devastating every single time, and every single time, I had to ask myself if I should just quit while I was behind and give up and spare myself this pain.
non_english: Bu her seferinde yıkıcı oluyordu, ve her seferinde, kendime sordum bu işi bırakmalı mıyım? Bu acıdan kaçmalı ve pes etmeli miyim?