That Uncle Sam said,
In terms quite well-bred.
"I'll please 140 ways back and hit down!"
The Republican Says:
Curious, is it not, that a country which regards treaties as setups of paper should be so anxious to make treaties with another country?
Ten Hundred Thousand.
Oriibbs? Is that young Miss Whizzer possessed of many attractions?
Stibbs? You let her father left her a million.
Patriotic and Unfortunate.
"They tell me," said the man from back home, "that you oppose the plan to keep liquor out of the dry States."
"That position," responded our reasonammum. "is determined by my ardent probation principles. I consider it necessary to permit the importation of sufficient whisky to keep on exhibition a supply of horrible examples."
"Is links a hard loser?"
"Not very. He would rather lose a couple of dollars than a couple of teeth."
To-Date: The Picked Joke.
"To elevate the stage," said Augustus Thomas, at the Players' Club in New York, "to elevate the stage would be an easy-enough job if there weren't so many people like the new Shakespeare Club.
"I said to the treasurer of this organization;
"'I understand your new Shakespeare Club is a great success."
"Great success? You let your sweet life it's  A great success!" he answered, warmly. "Why, we accumulated enough in lines for non-attendance during the first month to take us all to a box party at the musical comedy of "Pack Up. Pettina." Washington Star.
Wall Street Pianos.
Though bulls and bears proclaim with ease,
They treat all lambkins tenderly.
The fai is as they appear denote
Each tender lamb is made, the goal. 