it. He had spent years in patient study, and again for months
he had experimented upon his own incomprehensible sensations,
by alternately procuring himself every pleasure and amusement
which money could command, and then seeking the contrast of
solitary asceticism. His iron constitution of body had survived
all, but his bright intelligence had wearied of the struggle,
bruising its keen edge against the rocky barriers of the eternal
and the unknown. Wiser than his fellows, he knew that he
was no wiser than before; stronger than they, he knew the
weakness of all strength ; brave as the bravest, bravery seemed
to him but a clumsy exhibition of vanity at best, and altogether
contemptible from the moment it began to seek occasions for
showing itself. He could have understood playing the coward
for sake of examining the sensation, and would have laughed at
his own vanity, when it led him to redeem his character the
next moment by some act of reckless daring. What was it all,
but an amazing show of puppets, an astounding dance of lay-
figures, animated i by strings of which the ends opposite from
men were lost in infinite distance ? To dance, or not to dance,
was all the choice men had, and rather than play a part in such
a show as fell tO|his lot, it seemed better to break the strings
and let the miserable marionette fall into the black hole behind
the stage.
