BEING A BIT CHONKY IS BEAUTIFUL


ITS BEING HUMAN


I also want my thickness to still he here with me


being skinny is overrated


Yeah


Being chunky is where its at


I used to weight 203 pounds


How much do u weight now?


I'm now 175 pounds


Thanks


how long did it take to lose 28 pounds?


Like a whole school year


Just keep on pushing towards you goal


Of whatever it is


I want weight loss surgery


Turn a whole school year to half a school year to lose that


weight loss surgery leaves scars and stuff


Idk if I get scars


I just wanna be skinny


being skinny isnt even that good


Why


Be happy with how u are


I keep getting fat shamed by my dad


I'm not happy with myself at all


How old are u?


You've never seen me


Ive seen you send in selfies


Okay


Your beautiful


Thank you


But I dont have the self love to do that


I don't know how to love myself


Thanks


To love yourself you just need confidence in yourself


And believe that you can do anything


Damn but u cant be thicc without a love handles and a tummy


If you wish to be thicc without those its unrealistic


facts


and thats why im


insecure


I love tummy and love handles


They cute


Fr tho they are


Oo


Poggers


whats up love?


Im actually concerned


i can definitely imagine that being traumatizing...


Yea


I think you should talk to an adult irl and get some help


omg im so sorry


Look Im here too talk if you need it


but its clearly something that causes you pain now. just because it happened years ago doesnt change how it is bothering you now.


Of course were here to talk and listen but im not sure we can help you the way adults irl can


im here if you wanna talk about that too


we can only help so much, were here to lend an ear but none of us are professionals im afraid. id really encourage you to seek help from a psychiatrist and therapist if you can.


just to be safe


i can


i understand if you are unable to see someone, but do try to find an adult you can trust with this.


I can as well


Yeah


I know the feeling


and theres no blame on you for not being able to do anything.


i would if i were you


probably a good idea


ok dont lay down


that never help me tbh


Too


just sit on your bed


or something


no dont be sorry


theres nothing to apologize for


you have nothing to be sorry for


and sometimes we all feel lonely


Zero no need too feel alone


Im here


ill be here for you love


im sorry


facts


Im not going too be happy again


But if you look at the bright side at least you had a boyfriend


So theres a chance you might get another


then he didnt deserve you


Ah yeah


Im


Not


Nice one Gingie


No honey it wasnt


You have meaning too people


Dean The EMT Firefighter nice what?


And Gingie that wasnt very helpful


sorry


As in, sleep?


You should try resting


You can talk too me just please Im here for you and all of you


Yes you are more then me


Thank you


Like we are for you


always


Dont


Its trash can not trash cannot


Shut up Jack


NotSouls


I cant be loved with out feeling sad


got u


Fr tho


homies...


move along back to chat


like you 2'd depresso


wasnt 4


but 2


someone drag me in again plz


And Im me and me is a reck


Look Im just a person who loves to lead yall to a treasure I cannot have


Zero you are loving but some times dont dig down please stop just lead on


I want to start getting into anime


But its idk how to even approach it


i mean


if u got netflix start from there


i mean i started from my friend showing me fighting videos


or use websites but some of them have pop ups


but if ur gonna start id start on something simple like bnha or like something short but if u like different genres u could ask or find others


ya


maybe seven deadly sins its like 3 seasons but its 4 on netflix


Whats this youre talking abou


About


Oh


I don't need to be anyone favourite's person


When you realise you made them better for someone else


hit me in the face with car


in all honesty, the better solution here is for him to move out and get distance between his emotionally invasive family


ya its better to just have a distance until his parents cool off


lyrics?


or


like


exactly


i mean who in specific left you


your ex?


I feel like I dont fit in anywhere and Im jealous of the people around me cuz I see how they r successful in their lives while I just realized I have trauma from my past


what happened love?


I realized that all my friends r closer to each other and that in the friend groups Im in I cant call anyone of them my best friend


i get that, and its ok to feel like that


And at the same time Im trying to get a hang of my life since everythings just chaos


just let it go


if theyre not gonna help you with anything they arent worth it


The thing is not that they r not there for me the thing is that I dont feel like I can talk to them about this stuff cuz when I feel like im close to people I feel like I cant talk problems with them cuz of my old friends leaving me for being to depressed all the time cuz I had a traumatic experience


And everything is just wrong rn


Im in the middle of a storm


im sorry jojo


Hey jojo i get its hard to talk about your problems and since u had issues that made it worse, ik we aren't close but i consider you as a friend and would always love to talk to you and my dms are always open if u wanna talk about anything and i get its hard to open up but i will be waiting until u are comfortable with opening up


it does take time to reach out and open up but once you past those baby steps it will feel so much better


nopoint u r the nicest person on here i swear


That just makes my blood boil and I never even saw Black Panther, it's just common sense!


okayyy...?


I dislike people


In specific


That one


But its fine


YOU DISLIKE THE CELEBRITY THAT DIED?


BRAXTON IS BACK


LET ME TELL U ABOUT BRAXTON


BRAXTON LIKES PUBG


wait


BRAXTON SENSES A BANNED MAN


No need for caps kid


What?


no need for a circumcisions kid


uh


i feel like this is a banned alt account


me?


if you are not going to respect the fact that a man who was beloved by many sadly passed away, then you will be either muted or banned depending on the severity.


i think braxton is sus


K BAXTON is ok with that starting now


clingy loser yea fr


Mb


k check logs then if u so confident


pick fights?/


hehe BRAXTON LOVES FIGHTS


!snipe


sniped


I LIKIE ICELAND


Picking fights is not allowed on this server either, do not fight here, thank you


Why they keep talkin bout themself in third person like im fr worried for them rn


BRAXTON likes to beat the people up


ban? lmao im not5 on his side but specify


Im not tryna be mean so ima just stay outa this channel fo a bit


BRAXTONS ONLY FOE IS JAKE


Please take this outside of vent as this channel is actually meant for serious discussions and yknow, vents.


JAKEY BEATS BRAXTON UP


h u h


this is a reverent discussion


THAT IS SERIOUS


oh god


i


ii


BRAXTON hey bro are you doing ok


We can talk if you want


Im being serious


I usually have time on my hands and my dms are open


BRAXTON IS FINE


he is fine what is there rto worry ab


noir says they have a personality disorder


he is fine what is there to worry ab


CJ021 im just confused why are people like this


idk


But maybe its just an odd game they're playing


Just to get a reaction from peopls


what happened to/


he got banned?


BRAXTON WANTS TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO/


A personality disorder is def a big leap to assume


OR U WILL BE MY OPPONET THIS SUNDAY AT NO WAY OUT


I have experience with DID I'll catch on if there's a problem


But other than that, we are best not to assume


Yea


what happened to charles1x


There isn't anyone on the server called Charles1x


yeha he got banned


idk why tho


Oooh wait no no Charles1x is/


pls snipe


I'm gonna vent tf out on this channel.


So in my personal experiences with a long distance relationship it is a very hard thing to keep going. Like I dated this one girl for 23 months and things had always seemed fishy so I never fully committed to the relationship, I found out that she texting other guys and I instantly dipped, tbh I felt like an asshole for so long but after time I realized it wasn't worth it. I personally think that looking for an actual girlfriend is the best option


All I've had for 2 years is long distance relationships. I'm pathetic


You're not pathetic


You're empathetic if im guessing, im just taking a guess but do you easily get attached to people and get sad when friends leave?


Yup.


All the time.


I have attachment issues.


See im the same way


Sometimes when im playing games with people online I get sad when its over because I will never meet them again if they don't add me


Tbh i really dont know how to help it


Same, my parents were druggys and alcoholics and I was never actually loved


It tore me whenever I was told she was gonna give me up as a kid


I was told that I'd be given to another family, when I was 12 y/o. By both of my parents.


Yep, that tore a hole through me


I think I just attach to people to fill that void even though I know I will probably be left


I havent been in a actual relationship ever but I do feel like having someone to talk with and love would be nice


Once you find that person, make sure she feels the same first, then you tell her.


I've made the mistake of reversing that rule.


But if course, I'll never find someone. I've looked, and stopped looking.


Yeah, I have a girl I am really into but she's always hanging with another guy so it hurts


Get her attention. Do something out of your ordinary.


Well I would but I'm more of the quiet type unless I'm with my close friend group


As am I.


Just be you, and go up to her and talk to her, if she rejects you I hAvE a BoYfRiEnD just reject her back like you're not as hot as you think you are


It'll eat her alive.


I know for sure she's not that type of person, she would be sure to shut me down nicely


She is caring


That's good. At least she's a good one.


Yeah, I talk with her occasionally over text but we never really talk in person


I've learned to be mean, because I've dealt with some mean bitches in life.


Talk in person, it'll mean WAAAY more.


I'm not mean all the time. I'm actually the opposite.


Yeah, it will take some practice


Ask for help from a friend who's a girl.


I probably could


There's a start. And probably your best way to approach the situation.


Yeah, my approach was wait until senior year and ask her to prom


But I'm scared she will be dating the guy she hangs with a lot


Then ask her to hangout with you, now go do something with her and listen to her. Let her talk, but you make the decision on where to go and what to do, but ask her stuff too, and give her a choice, but only give 2 options.


I've suggested hanging out but she always ask if the other guy can come, i think when i can get a car ill offer to take her to dinner one night


Can you drive now?


Not yet


Ask her out to dinner, and tell her that guy cannot come.


But next week I can


Nice


I'll ask her if just her and I could go out to dinner


Yes. That, but say it like I'm going to dinner and I would like you to join me. And insert name here cannot come


Alright, I'll definitely do that. And i live in a small town so it will have to be a small local restaurant but thats fine with me


That'll work. Make sure you pay for the whole thing, if she offers to pay, still pay.


Make sure to have enough money for you and her to go do something after that, like idek...


Yeah she is like that, whenever there was a fair we both went together and payed for the tickets when I was doing something


She sounds like a really good person.


She really is, she's smart, cute, and a genuinely good person


Catch her if you can.


Yep, im trying to play it slow right now


Yup, and just be calm


Yeah, my nerves are a lot of the time jumpy around her so I try to be calm


You heart races, doesn't it?


Yep, and it gets hard to form sentences


Just stay calm, and compose yourself. Tell her that you like her, at some point, probably later in that evening. Just chill out and talk with her, be real with her, but not to open or revealing. Let her guess and make her want you.


Yeah sometimes


so you and I are in agreement


yes we are


welp imma go die have fun with the rest of your life give everyone my regards


Idk what its called


It happens sometimes you get the bad ones


Gives you trust issues when you get one tho


are you american?


No im british


And so is slip


Whos Slip?


Person who is typing


she also shrugged and tutted at me


ALOT


Spilling a drink is literally an accident how are you meant to even try control that


no clue


i also was dancing on the rug and he told me to get off the rug and i did and then he beat me for getting off the rug


its technically your fault but he shouldnt of done that


Windnut17 excuse me what?


Wtf


Wait isnt slip Australian or did she move


Why is that?


No


Stop.


Gee im bri ish hehe


Thats literally victim blaming


Yea


You dont say that


Ever


How was it ever gonna be their fault?


Like how?


She spilled a drink. Literally an accident.


i cleaned it up aswell so like how it was a problem i will never understand


OH MERRY 30TH OF AUGUST


Good morning


lmao


i put off doing my essay


and now i have 2 days left


until we submit


no lessons to work on it


AND we have more work from other classes


why do i have to be so stupod


YOU GOT THIS GEE JUST WORK REALLY REALLY HARD


im in year 9 and i cant do my work


imagine grade 12


If you need me to mute you from the server for the next 2 days so you can work I can


Give you less distractions


no its fine


i dont usually use discord on pc


Okay, if youre still far behind after tomorrow Im gonna mute you for a day so you can focus


okay thank you


Of course, I firmly believe in you


well i dont believe in me but thank you


TAKE ALL MY BELIEF OKAY


TAKE IT ALL


have to sleep but if you need anything feel free to reach out


You got this, you really do


you better


Try to split it up into smaller sections and it might make things a bit more manageable and I will


ok


i will try


wait


Yeh?


i will use the wise words of yoda


Indeed indeed


did that not work?


Nope


why is it link


probably


Pffft if it isnt itll usually make it a link


I think


well now it isnt working at all


do need sleeps, goodnight honeybee, if it works just dm me Yodas wise words


Try not to, and of course


Goodnight/good day


goodnight betty


its nearly night for me but


bye


And now Ive been reminded about other work I forgot about


im doing it again


i keep overthinking


read my messages from


you will understand


Idk why Im telling you people this


I dunno if I have it but I get embarrassed really easily and I find it hard to talk to someone without stuffing up my words


ugh


okay im genuinely scared my charger was having a seizure so i went to get my mums charger and she walked in and said thats my dildo charger UGXITZITSUTSTSYOYSOUTSUSIT9YTS8YTS8TYD8T8TD8YD8YD8TDTS77TD7TDY I WANT TO DIE IM SO SCARRED FOR LIFE


slipknot.toad6764 NO


RUN


GET OUT


LEEEAVE


LMFAO


IM PLANNING TO


IM PACKING


not that type of packing


BUT PACKING MY SHIT UP


packing


lesoka


or hevi?


IDFK HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW


DOES SHE MEAN VIBRATOR CHARGER


Dildos dont use chargers tho they are just hard rubber or plastic idk


StopTheEwo you can get dildos that vibrate lmao


fancy


posh dildos


lmao what


Taylax yes


thats stupid that people dont understand that we are all humans everyone cries and gets hurts, they probably cry too but think its better for them to make fun of but honestly crying just means you are letting it all out and not just bottling up the pain ehich will make it worse


soo true


do it


yeds


yes


and boys are supposed to be strong


yeah ikr and you're to be good at sports and everything like that


if anyone's up for big sad talks i'd love to


do u wanna have a big sad talk?


kinda do


would u like to talk about ur sad talk or someone elses


anything goes


sharing big sad is cool


well then do you have something on ur mind thats bothering u?


i kinda do. uhhh is it okay to talk about mental illness here


yes its fine, you can talk about anything u like or want to talk about


and if u rather not say it here we can always go to dms so im not gonna force you to do anything


ok neat. so i have bipolar disorder and now it's a depressive episode for me so i kinda feel really down. i used to draw and all but rn i don't have energy to even get up and shower. also this year i've lost all my friends and ppl that could actually just yk interact with me so i'm completely socially deprived. i has a few kms attempts too and lots of sh but now it's getting better ig, replace harmful stimming with smth else. so it's been rough this year. and i kinda do not cope rn. like i've been having lost of self care recently and i almost managed to feel alive? dunno how to describe it. but now it's all going back, like i've done nothing. i feel helpless and drained. and i really dunno what's gonna happen tomorrow when i get back to society and studying, it kinda freaks me out. so yeah. things r hard. life's too


im really sorry u have a rough year and im gonna be honest there will be worse but that feeling u got that feeling of feeling alive isn't impossible cause u felt it right and there always will be a way to get back to that feel, you will jump as high as u can feel it for a moment then get back down but that just means u know that feel and are able to go back to that feeling


thanks bud


there is always gonna be saddness in life but the way we know the feeling of being happy and knowing that u felt it makes it even more that u want that feeling, ik this is kinda confusing cause now idk what im saying but all im saying if you know what you want and that feeling ik u can get through hard times


it's kinda getting harder and harder to distinguish the feeling of being alive or happy


and i understand but you always gotta keep trying


yep i do


there will never be that you can't be happy, there is always a chance even if its small still a chance to be happy


to feel that special thing


and its different for everyone so i can't say ik it


hopefully i can find it again


but ik what it feels like


ik u will find it


i believe


you are strong


thanks:,


it means a lot


anytime


its always nice to have a smile on someone else


naw u so cute


so do u have anything to share? i'm here to listen


i mean since you shared, im ok to share


so even tho my problem is just minor, im always going back to the feeling of loneliness and like people expect me to do a lot and want me to be the image they are thinking of and i always try to follow and do what others tell me cause i don't wanna be a disappointment again and i just lost the feeling of wanting something its like i don't know what i want anymore, im not really best shape physically been having some problems and mentally i always try to stay strong that im special and able to get through but just break out and feel like im not gonna move on from the feeling, and idk just kinda lost but im doing fine, just having some mental issues i think nothing serious probably just stress or idk, physically probably just cause im lazy and lost the motivation to do anything but im coping ig surviving would probably be better word


i just feel like i should never be not ok and just stay happy which i try to, just get those depressing moments but ya idk my unique life isn't really unique, a lot of people know what they want and work on it, i have potential to be great but just waste it cause i don't have goals or want anything, my sister she is awesome always study and working on me and i just be lazy and don't care, i feel like shes older then me and ik im smart at times and actually try i can do stuff but idk i don't want to try i just rather give knowledge i have to my sister and im not really going anywhere in life so ya


i mean no human being alive is always happy. like legit. allow yourself to be sad or depressed because it's natural. it's okay to feel off. we all do. and comparing problems should never be a things because yeah ppl got worse lives out there but it's your life and it's feels bad. also looking at other people's achievements doesn't really help a lot. take a break, make up your mental health and then maybe try to start creating goals. if you feel like life's failed it's actually not. i'm an adult and i'm like really unsuccessful among ppl my age. but i don't really care. life doesn't end this fast and someday i'm gonna be successful too. and you too


thank you3


u welcome hun


I miss her soo much rn


Gee hows the essay going?


is it bad that I'm like pushing myself away from everyone days before school starts and I don't feel bad about it, like I actually find it better


its not bad for doing something that makes u feel better


if u feel like being alone is better rn for u then u do u, then when the times come go out and find new friendships


it's Wierd bc yeah I like being on my own and not have to worry about pier pressure and everything but then I get sad when I see people having a party or something and not inviting me so like idk


tf kii?


HenryTheHoover i get that feeling, sometimes u just gotta go in and see what happens cause sitting back doesn't really help


well this isnt good


my essay is due in 2 hours


i know thats a lot of time


but i dont believe i can do it in time


im gonna fail everything next year


im in year 9


and im struggling to write an essay over the course of 1 week


we are supposed to do 3 essays in 3 hours


i hate this


FUCK


I NEED TO CONCENTRATE


?mute Gee 1 hour


Gee Gee youll be fine I know its stress full but just lay back and listen ya know?


all the classes I got in were hell


Pure chaos


And I bearly even listened yet I passed. If a retard like me can pass youll be fine


I can help if you need help with it


As long as it aint maths


NoPoint0004 thank you I'll try doing that


peachfizz


SHE SAYS HOLA COMO ESTA SHE SAYS KONICHIWA


GET OUT


Please stop venting in the venting channel thxs


umm ok, ill vent in chat then


Oh no


agreed


Ik him irl aswell... i just realised i cant vent here now without some of my friends seeing which was the main reason i vented here


i mean u can always vent in dms, my dms are open


aww how nice


NoPoint shsundd awe thank you sim


Taylax


Taylax yea, unless your venting about me, i don't actually care


You should know this


U big bafoon


Hense the fact I have not looked back in this chat


About to call no point a simp but it is in their roles so


ya a simp for helping out nice


Neither is showing respect


kids found out about the word and wont shut up


ikr


I think


Unless our lord and saviour Jesus Christ comes and saves me


I think I might have to


High i mean its not that. its more i dont want you guys to know abt alot of stuff i talk abt and used to in here. i find it kinda awkward when you then have to face them the next day after they know abt your most recent mental breakdown


Goddd


U need bigger things to worry about lmao


Then about I might see a rant you made


I can leave if u wantTaylax


chill


no you are fine i can go in dms or just delete my vents after, i havent even vented in awhile since ive been generally okay recently


Do you have anyone else in here? Taylax


phoenix, ren and luka


High


Hm


K


Interesting


Ima go with what I think you meant not what you actually said and leave it, I just won't go in this channel ez fix


Taylax


Go to sleep


Its like 1am


School soon


You can not be having these late nights


its 6:50 pm actually


It's actually every.30


Pmam


This is venting


Don't look into it


maybe


High i was up till like 6am yesterday lmao


i am going to bed in a few tho


good


Halp


Whats this channel for


for


Venting


It says vent bruv


What does that mean


venting


Ahh


Yep


Well I accidentally ate a pancake


How was that an accident


Just idk


were u forced or sumthing?


I just wanted to get that off my chest


Alright man


Sucks


good for you?


Yes


Alright cya guys


h e l p a h a h a h a


Bong water


moans


No but actually help


Im really bad at rejecting people and i wanna stay friends


And its quarantine so like


They feels prolly fake


Ha


Yea i did


Idk bro i think i might just drop them entirely


They being defensive now


Nvm


I'll live


Sorry


yea cut them off


But thats mean


Ahhh


no its not


of their being fake then just do it


drop the toxic


it may seem bleh now, but its definitely the right move


Alri


i was feeling the same way about my ex before i broke up with him, but trust me itll be worth it


What is wrong with me


I never think before I do something


And it always turns out bad


everyone makes mistakes, just gotta learn from it, try to take ur time don't rush things


I have had this problem for ages though


As I kid I always made the wrong decision and now when Im asked to pick something I can never decide


And when I do I feel really guilty


ok there really is no wrong decisions


we just make decisions we regret


but u just gotta go with it


regretting it does nothing


Like for my birthday few years back i was with my nan and she was getting me a present light and she wanted me to chose so I didnt chose the one I like I chose the cheaper one and I know that was good but mum said why did you pick that one


you know what u did wrong now just remember that for next time, even tho its been a problem for awhile u have the power to change it


just take ur time


She says hola como esta She says Konichiwa


Ive had the problem for so long that my parents are grounding me if I say Im not sure when they ask me to chose


Which is very annoying


Choose randomly


Once I didn't study for a test, then I started randomly deciding the answers and I passed


That creates unnecessary stress


Wow


Well I dont like talking in front of people even friends and I always stuff up


So any extra stress is bad


Indeed


Gods plan


Woah


I dont think wishing someone was dead is a good thing unless they are reallly bad


But Im sorry about whats happening to you


I hope it gets better soon


I just Pissed myself


Nice


good for you?


Venting


ok


MUDAE


I have no one to talk to in my family


The one that I talked to the most is going to be muted


why?


wait wait wait


im confused


She chose to be muted


And she said it hurts your vocals if you do it


And I told her ehy you doing it?


She said shes been thinking about doing this when she was 8


wait


w h a t


And she told me to not tell my or her family about it


Why would she


What


thats just why


Ye ah


and u can still talk to her just that she isn't able to speak


And shes gonna tell some of her friends about it


Yeah I can still talk to her through text just not on voice


but why does she wanna do it


Thats so confusing


frfr


Theres no benifit


exactly


like shes gonna do it just to do it?


she said it hurts too


whats the point


Yea


Idk yey


Yet


Some people often choose not to talk because they either prefer not speaking or they do it as like.. a way to prove that they can do something and have control


But yeah you can still talk to her and she can write out responses and hug you and be there for you


Yeah but I wanna have it om voice not on text


Hmm


Maybe see if she can get a tex to voice thing


Okay


Good news


She was still able to talk to me


She just said she will start it from tomorrow


But she got her phone privileged away for a month


Sorry to hear that


It's okay I was able to study with her actually


I feel so sad and alone and I don't know how to exactly express it in words, but I generally don't feel like anyone gives a fuck about me anymore compared to my life before COVID, before everything. That's how I'll divide everything in rn, I just feel so tired, lonely and ik I shouldn't need to constantly connect with others to be happy, but it doesn't help feeling nonexistential and purposeless. I try to VC with people and I get constantly ignored these days, I post artwork on twitter and only get 2 likes after 24 hours, while I tag a lot out of it, while I see other tweets get 15 likes in 2 minutes. I go on instagram and see my irl friends like my other friends' stories instead. I post so many stories about my day out but I barely get anyone dming me, except like one person who I find kinda tiring to reply to all the time since he probably won't accept the things I constantly do and I post artwork in a discord server I'm active in but nobody gives a shit about it. Idk if it's because I expect so many likes but now I get nexttonothing and irl I'm just an unattractive asian dude that everyone will just constantly ignore because I'm different.


i feel you and im gonna be honest, everyone is happy cause they have other people in life its just how people work, you just havent found those right people that will make you happy and enjoy ur life, you are still young and have a long way to go and there will be many chances of every thing life isnt over, you seem like a very nice and sweet person and people here are very nice and accept all and we have an art channel so if u like to post ur art here u can, people comment on the art work and its always positive, we are a community that talks to each other and try to include everyone so you can always just talk with us


yeah im the same there, i usually get left out but putting heaps of stuff on your story may feel good but for other people it can be really annoying


So much to read


yup


Thanks guys, yeah I know I'm young but I guess being at home constantly keeps me feeling existential, I turned 21 last month so I feel like I'm aging quick, even though I didn't feel this much when I was 20. I constantly just get scared that I haven't done much in life and I'm gonna regret everything I've ever done when I'm older. Constantly serverbouncing to find a community is proof of that , but sure I have a few friends but not when I need them mostly.


toad 3 get I got the sweaters I just need to mail it


ok there is gonna be a lot of things happening in ur life all the time, its just how life is, i don't think u are a burden i don't ever think anyone is, if people want u there then u aren't a burden just cause u do nothing doesn't make u a burden


It's also a note so open up the paper and read ehats inside:3


But the problem is I need to go to the mail store and have them mail it to you


I dont have the red flag from my mailbox because it got stolen


So I'm gonna just have to send it through mail stote


HunnyPuppy OOO YAY


toad 3 but I also have to remove it and add a dash of perfume to make your day better and a note;


thankyou so much youve made me smile today ive felt terrible


thankyou


Happy to help


You're welcome:3


I want the person who would awlays check up in me to come back


honestly same i miss him a lot


But to bad that person stopped


we never talk anymore and every time we do we act like weve been friends for 30 minutes


It honestly made me cry when they stopped checking on me


And its gonna make me cry again


Who?


i cried hard over them


Me too


Someone who promised that they will check up on me all day


I honestly miss that person


Can I know what that someones name is?


uh no sir


I don't know his name


thats classified information


Oh ok sss sorry


I think I lost his username in my Dms


wait what you dont know his name?


damn


I mean their name


They didnt tell me their gender so


I just want someone to check up on me all day


It will make me feel happy if it did


MI PAN ZU ZU ZU


So In my human life, I always compared myself to other. And thought I was Cool”. Which meant I gotten bad grades. Then they got good because I didnt care what others meant, and didnt compare. Now, I compare my life to my friends. Like what would she do. And its quite frustrating. Or thinking negative thoughts when Im in Zoom. I just dont know how to not compare myself anymore.


just compare to your past


see how u improved


Right


ya


its ok to compare, just comparing with others can stress a person a lot


only person u should compare urself with is u


i say comparing is pretty shit and i hate it but i do compare myself to my past and see how much i have grown


Yeah. I compared my self to my pass just now and it helped. How I can improve and what mistakes I have been doing. Thank you NoPoint


I used to bully a girl


Which made her move schools


I didn't even cared


I just wanted something to realise my anger at


I was being emotionally and physically abused by my parents


But I guess it got back to me


I started getting bullied when I was in 6th grade


But I got bullied in 7th grade


And I bullied him back


are u trying to day u wanna like apologize to them m?


I do


But idk were to find her I don't have her contacts


Nope


I didnt have a phone back than


Bye


Love you all


Wha


gee u good


he not gonna be on for a few days


Yeah I'm struggling with the comparing aspect too.


how do i distract myself


like i have misphonia and i have a lot of trigger sounds and my hearing is terrible but like i can hear things as fine as breathing


I usually listen to music or just rain at a low volume so I can still hear what others say if they need to speak to me but I cant hear the icky noises


like i listen to music but i cant blast it and i cant listen to it when talking to ppl


I tried it but accidentally used a butter knife so my psychotic break didnt las long enough so here I am


Huh, for me its chewing noises that just make me super uncomfortable


Would maybe just one earbud playing music help?


nope


bc i tend to focus on the trigger sounds uncontrollably


and ik i shouldnt and all but like i try not to but its like my brain is addicted to them


why not when speaking to someone focus on their voice, or maybe watch a movie and just focus on their voices


try to ignore every other sounds and just focus on the voices


you could try writing down what somebody is saying so you have to focus on that instead?


thats what i try and do like focus on the voice but i just cant get over the noises


it just annoys me sm


maybe listen to a podcast?


just sit in ur room and only listen to the podcast


I like brutally murdering small animals helps me release stress and think about all the people Ive hurt


podcast are fun to listen to cause most of them are funnei


Oh!


Mantis why do you want to remember the people u hurt?


If you want a podcast try MBMBAM My Brother, My brother and Me


Well most of them are girls and I think its funny disappointing girls


And it helps me retain my loneliness


i mean wouldn't it be better to just be nice to be people to not be lonely?


Im only nice to ppl I think are cool and I care about


Most of the girls Ive disappointed have garnered no interest from me


ok well then if u are intending on disappointing them then why hurt animals?


And I like being lonely itll make me feel better if I find someone I truly love


i mean truly love can be friendship too


NoPoint oh mostly bc the squirrels are stealing. My tomatoes form my garden


Ya


I usually hit them with a bb pellet then put them out of their misery


And I live in a suburb btw


So ya I have to be a good shot


so like you kill them cause they stealing or cause u want to feel better?


Stealing mostly


I play basketball and listen to music to feel better


thats good


I wanna level up so I can choose roles


Ughhh


So wat r u into


wdym?


Hobbies or things u like


o um mainly just listen to music ig


otherwise i don't really do anything else


Thats cool


Yay thank you baby


Not sexually baby just your name


its all good


How do I use the roles the emojis arent showing


can u ss and show it in media


Ur listening to roses? I used to like that song


How do I link Spotify?


ya i always have music on so its like random songs


you can put the link in media


I had a hard time sleeping yesterday since it was just only me


My sister wasn't even in the room


But she is here now


My parents picked her up from my aunts house


But I almost had a breakdown of being alone


I couldn't fall asleep untill like at 12:55


I hate sleeping alone it makes me feel threatened


awe


Are you ok?


No I'm not okay


I hate sleeping alone


It makes me feel threatened


And I have to fall alseep with a night light on and watch TV while sleeping


I can't sleep alone


I remember when I was like that


The only way to get comfortable sleeping alone is by sleeping alone


But I hate sleeping alone


It made me feel threatened when I was 5 or 4


I was able to sleep but I still felt threatened even when my sister was here in the room with me I kept seeing demonic stuff around my bed ad I was very scared to keep my hands open wide so had something to hold or make in a fist or just hold my own hands


I needed to use the restroom which I did


But when I cake back it felt like someone was here in the same bed as me


Like their were trying to comfort me by sleeping with me


I liked the company but I was getting cold


So I used my really heavy blaky to cover me and it made me sweat but it didnt matter but I wor up in cold sweat when I remove the blanket off me


We live in a social society


hello


I am mad I have smol pp


ella you are absolutely stunning


I understand that everyone is different and stuff but everything else about my appearance has gotten better that I hated before. Now theres just this one thing about myself that I hate. Ive never cared much more self love or being my own person. I know that if this doesnt somehow improve as I get older which it most likely wont then I'll probably get some sort of hair transplant, but until then I have to live like this


And I know its a small, trivial thing but I just hate feeling subpar


Thank you simar and dean


tell me 10 things u love about urself


Not much physically except my hair


Illusive everyday say 1 thing that u love about urself in the mirror for like a week


There isn't much to say


there so much to say


I'm gonna get a new therapist


Since the one I have rn isnt answering my mom phone calls


So it's been months without therapy


ok if u think u need therapy then thats good


And it seems that I'm getting happier ot sadder without my therapy


I can't tell of my emotions


I awlays get shut down everytime I'm happy or feel confident about something


I really do need some friends that doesn't really shut me down when I get hyped


But atleast I got better friends


So I'm happy for them for not shutting me down


Bit I just can't understand my emotions


I don't know what emotions I'm feeling everytime


Nervous or happy


Angry or sad


I can't tell the difference


I'm just very upset that I can't understand myself anymore


i mean no one ever knows what emotion they feel rn


its just whatever u feel at the moment


Yeah but I cant never seem to understand myself


Like I cant read myself


Like I'm not me


Emotion stuff is hard for me


So I know how you feel


HunnyPuppy you could try getting a dictionary and looking at nervous AND happy and looking at definitions and synonyms until you get better at distinguishing them maybe?


Illusive okay


attak3 there could be Chance youre dissociating or if something traumatic happened to you, your memory could just be suffering. To try and help, you could download Lumosity to try and work on memory and carry around a journal so you can write down everything important that you want to do, and check them off when you do. You should also get fish oil pills, which help to directly improve the memory part of the brain


i kinda think i need to see a doctor because i think i have ptsd. i asked my mum and she just scoffed at me and idk what to do because im crying everyday and i have really dark circles under my eyes and it looks weird i also hate my weight because all the people i like are way skinnier than me and my metabolism is so slowww w w anyways there was this girl who ruined my life and just as soon as ive started to get it back together school starts and shes there and being really nice to me. my best friend has forgiven her but idk if im ready yet because she broke all trust i had of her but i feel really horrible because she doesnt have many friends because shes so horrid to everyone. her friends bullied me for self harming and being bisexual and she joined in and never stopped them. i feel so mean for not being frens with her but ive no clue when the right time is.


oo yay hehe


also sowwy for a really big para


first off, maybe tell another adult to help you check out if u do have ptsd, and you are beautiful for you, everything about you is wonderful and if you want to improve on yourself start ur own goals and make a change, and its ok not to forgive someone you broke ur trust, you dont have to consider her as a friend just like hang out with ur friends and if she is there either you can just hang out with them idk kinda hard to explain and ur not being mean for choosing u rather have friends over


help help help


Help


i have an issue with my online college course


it still says i owe nothing and my friend started hers and apparently she has work due already


she had the same issues as me im panicking


Well i sadly know nothing about college i wish i can help you have you tried asking around?


people dont like me because Im expressing myself differently than them


I dont know what to do


expressing urself how?


People dont like our Furryness


why care if people like u or not


just find people who do like you and hang out with them


Because I want to be loved


gasp


again whos y'all


Thats a personality trait!


im not asking for ur name


who is the y'all


im shawty


we are all people


so


I love animals


so do i


im the melody


Like I LoVe them


i mean i did something?


Big Daddy Fly and thats perfectly fine


what did i specifically do


Daddy?


hes never been the same


ok idk who ur daddy is and i didn't even do anything so like ya


a weak defense


But I miss my Daddy!


corpses are tight


what


Mmm


idk i was just watching anime and i came on to see this


what anime


fruit basket


Watch us instead UwU


we can put on a real good show


Ew anime gorss


wizzlebop so u hating on anime?


tickles


gasp


and u think thats right?


but people can't hate on furries?


aii


thats a part of who u are, not a hobbY


idk they are just questions


im aloud to ask questions


then leave


OOO


YEeeS


DAdDyYy


Of corpse not


idk


tickles booty


Im 9, Borg is my sister


im a mod so i don't encourage people doing wrong things


Sweet home Alabama


No not MomMy


just ban us


please


I said I was 9


sounds like effort


end my suffering


licks nips


caresses butt plug


nipples


so like who wanted to get banned?


Can you buy my tabi toe socks?


u want me to buy ur tabi toe socks


yes


What


ya im a pretty lazy person


oki


Lmao


idk i cant sleep. i should sleep early cause i have school tomorrow but im so nervy and anxious for it i cant...


Same I'm here with you


I usually eat before I eat


Idk of that's healthy


But I usually drink sleeping tea when I have a really hard time sleeping


Maybe that will help you


i would but we only have british tea and my parents are in bed


Ouh


Well


Try mixing the tea with sleeping pills


Like crush dem pills and put it in the tea and drink it maybe that will help


I used to be scared of taking pills


But not anymore


i mean best to check it out


i mean thats the best thing to do is the check it out


it is


but we're supposed to get our insurance cards any day and im pretty sure my mom wouldnt let me


at least until then


maybe its better to talk to your parents and see what the best possible thing to do


you ok?


sorry im late


NoPoint I'm not sure what was wrong. I just felt numb and started getting more depressed than I had been in a while.


Mr. RavenWolfe have u told ur parents about this?


I don't live with either of them nor do talk to them anymore NoPoint


who do you live with?


Myself


do you any adult that u are close with?


Nah, I'm not really open to talking with people idk. None of my neighbors are really...talkative.


i cant use basic pain meds bbc they give me headaches


THIS IS THE BBC


is the pain still there? itll feel a bit like cramps


yeah


it feels like cramps and then my right thigh feels like its being crushed


its hard to explain


like i feel nauseas a LOT


okay try pressing on your lower right of your abdomen


itll hurt if you press if your appendix is inflamed


you have?


was it not removed?


but it was pms


it hUrts


ohh


right okay


does the pain come in like waves


and we need our health insurance


like it comes and goes etc.


extreme pain comes in waves but theres still a persistent small pain


this doesnt sound good im not going to lie


you have alot of the symptoms


if you press on your lower right abdomen it hurts correct?


a high temperature and flushed face is also a symptom along with feeling and being sick


constipation or diarrhoea are ones along with a loss of appetite but what you are describing now feels very similar


97.2 after i walked


i dont have either of those i just have tons of pain and headaches


and nauseas


i say get in contact talk to your parents, go to a doctor. if its nothing its nothing. but better to be safe than sorry


having it rupture inside will need antibiotic treatment or you risk getting blood poisoning


i cant go anywhere thats the thing:


exactly


im not allowed anywhere until we get our health insurance cards


yeah actually considering what this is abt that might be good but also you said that these symptoms started earlier this morning for me anyways


ive had symptoms but they keep getting worse


i was in hospital for like a day or so and spent a day with symptoms. thats how long i lasted before it burst. how long till you get your health insurance cards?


still you really should tell your parents. i was lucky it ruptured just before surgery so they could treat it but any later was a serious health risk. i dont wanna sugar coat it and im sorry if this worries you but if it is appendicitis and it bursts its a large risk and likeliness of dying of blood poisoning due to the infection


please do, i hope everything works out and goes okay 3


no problem, stay safe satan


lmao no i did to i was tryna be serious but i lowkey snorted and choked on air


Idk if I have depression anymore


But I still feel loney


Like no one wants me


And I get really extremely bad anxiety when ever I leave my house


It feels like a whole ton of eyes are on me


And it honestly kinda made me commit suicide


But I was able to survive from it


I tried to over dose


It it only made my throat hurt


But I was able to recover


I didnt tell anyone that I tried to overdose except for my friends at school


Do you still feel this way sometimes?


Yes


It feels like no one wants me to be around


And I know there are some people who wants me to be around them but I just feel like that's a total lie


Like everyone leaves me even I need someone


I honestly hate it


I don't feel alone around my pet dog


Because she awlays come to me whenever I feel alone or am alone


Awww thats nice having a pet can really boost your spirit and make you feel alot better thats what i love about pets


But have you ever tired talking 2 family or freinds about this or no?


Honestly i had someone saying that same stuff 2 me before about family if you family really treats you like that then im sorry


Is there anyone you trust?


No oneb


Not even the adults that are parents


Tbh i dont really talk 2 my parents about things as well reasons


Yeah same here


I have communication problems with my dad


SAME


Well atleast she sometimes listens thats show she aleast cares right?


Yeah


Ajdhdhbd


I WAS READING THAT D:


well then im glad i did delete it then


bc it was not something worth reading


prolly just waste a minute of your time


Anything is worth reading 333 no worries you wont waist any of my time. If I can help someone thats my goal


Pls snipe


Valor i think ur parents would care


Well I care about you and your well being:/


Yea man


If you need to talk im here


We all care abt u


ya man


No Im not lying, I wouldnt lie nor play someone like that. Were being genuine


exactly, why would anyone lie


we care for you and want u to succeed in life


it may take time but it will happen


Mhm, whatever your going through theres light at the end of the tunnel. There are people walking that dark place with you there are people who relate people who comes to rescue..those are the ones who understand. There is light I promise


i mean im an online dude, there is no need for me to lie, i care about everyone and want to help as much as possible, i can't say i will see u in teh future but i want to help as much as possible


Not all people are like that though


Thats completely wrong of her dude and if its defense its not wrong


Plead physical defense


What is she the type to whine her way out of everything..?


If so Ill have my rope and bleach ready


Bee kinky


NoPoint I do have special treatment for those who want it..


Bee


Woah


Valor why do u delete the messages?


because i made a mistake and i try my best to fix them and deleting the message is the only way i can fix my mistake


its not


trust me


Its not a mistake, nothings a mistake my guy it may be a slight incident but I mean noting is a mistake


i do the same thing


i vent here then delete it right after


it doesn't help


you talking here is 1 step closer to becoming better


Yea


Getting it out is


But once more we wont force you


Feel better man.. I hope everything gets better and gets you on the right track keep your head up 3


It would be easier to type it out than react


But its alright


Damn ok


ok well ima head to bed but not really im listen to music in a ball


bc thats what i do best


Hm


Thats alright


Keep your head up 3 gn sleep well love you no hetero


Cya later man


Gn valor


Valor ur not putting ur problems on us


u put it here and we came here willing to help


don't blame urself


we are just here to help


nah i actually put it here to get it off my chest and for no one to see but that didnt end up well


well its better to talk to others


not rlly bc now i have put my self in this situation


in a situation where people want to help u?


i mean u are never alone mate, there are many people here that want to help


NoPoint yes


i mean people care about u thats why


thats kinda the problem i dont want to bring people down with my problems


i just want to get it off my chest


Valor ur not bringing anyone down


I been dealing with depression lately and I been down I took a one day break and I feel kinda better


Mrflilfli Im sorry to hear thats youve been dealing with that, Ik it can be really hard and no one has the same experience, Im here for you whenever you need it tho, dont feel alone


also Im glad the break helped


I'll get atlseast 1 hug because someone is proud of me for survive after I tried to over dose in my prescriptions, was able to take up all the hate I was getting, was able to stand up for myself when no one can, I was able to still stand up and move on when my ex left me twice, when I stopped cutting myself for 2 years now and all of that for just 1 hug so I can be proud of myself


Ah congrats on being 2 years clean! And good for you that you were able to get into a correct mind set and help yourself


Yea nice job bro proud of you


Oof


Yea i will on monday i just rlly wanna get closer to miracle the girl as when we r together we ligit have the best convos and like i fell like ppl would hate me for wanting to be besties w other ppl


Nah its your choice mate someone cant stop you from being friends with other people


ya if they are blocking you from what u really want then its better to let them go, if this mate of urs makes u happy then go hang out with her more


Yea ty


u wanna talk about those thoughts or u rather not?


why do you think u think about violence?


i have no idea


is there something that u are mad at?


no


this has been going on since like june


is there something that u regret doing?


kinda


maybe the violence came from that


u wanna talk about what u regretted?


ok thats fine


the sex thing i think thats just normal teenager thoughts


Since i was 8 or 9 less and less ppl ahve remembered my bday that aint fam last yr no one remembered so does that mean no one cares and i kinda feel like its the univerese telling me to go


maybe something is stressing u thats making these violent thoughts?


im not sure


i mean im gonna be honest i dont remember bdays thats just me i only remember if they talk about it a lot or i talk to them a lot


i sometimes forget mine


me?


WHO


I HAVE NO ONE I PRETEND IM THE HAPPY FRIEND AND THE THERAPIST FRIEND BUT IN REALITY IM THE SADEST MY MATE THINKS I HAVE maladaptive daydreaming disorder AND NOT ONE PERSON SAYS OH HI DANNI HRU? ITS ALWAYS ME GOING OH HIII U ALR THEN LYING I STRUGGLE TO LET MY FEEKINGS OUT EVEN ON HERE AS I FEEL ABD


Bad


LIKE IM BOMBARDING U W MY THOUGHTS AND I FEEL SO BAD


some girls were at a sleepover and saw that i was at a guys house on snap map and assumed i was hooking up but i was on VACATION and he was keeping my streaks and now it's going around and i've tried to talk to some of them and clarify but they're denying it but i know they started it bc one of my friends was at the sleepover and she told me and aaa


i'm mortified


anddd there's one girl who's in charge of it all and i'm scared to confront her/dm her clarifying


and now i'm scared that the ones i dmed are making fun of me because of how i clarified i want to crawl under a rock and die


oh nice


Can i vent pls


I rlly need to something has just happend


Vent no one is stopping you


have u talked to her about how u feel about this


attak3 its ok to be scared but sometimes being honest hurts but its better then not telling what happen


When you go to a party and don get asked to take picture with when everyone else does


Even the hosts siblings got photo


I didnt even get tagged on insta


oh my god


thats so horrible


cant relate to the party thing but


that sounds terrible


My second party this year I went to


NoPoint if ur talking to me then yea i did but she just laughed


Danni 3 then i dont think u should be friends with this person


Yea and the thing is ive been invited to a bday oarty and she will be there:


do u want to go to the party?


My mom will force me to go as i dint see anyone anymore but im scared to acc like speak to ppl


Yea i rlly do but ahe will be there and another one going hates me


OMG DRACO JUST CAME ON THE TV


ok just go but be careful maybe try not to interact with them


Ye i will try not to


If i feel awkward i will just daydream more then i normally would


Which is pretty easy


but try to socialize too


talk to people


Yea i will try


small talk


ya try ur best


But i get awkward a bit around ppl


and thats perfectly ok


as long as u tried to talk to people is what matters


baby steps


Yea and everyone going have all been mates since yr 1 but i only came mates w them in yr 5/6


So its like i would feel like im intruding


it doesnt matter when u met them, just hang out with them, friends can be found anytime


Yea its like i get left out tho in that group


if they dont want u in the group im sure they would tell you but you are in the group for a reason, they want u there


And the sad thing is im always being left out and even my teacher knows but she just moves me no way near them so i gdt left out even more


No trust me when i werent w them on friday ive never seen them so happy its like im a dead weight and its awkward if they just go'danni we dint want u to be w us anymore'


i mean do you want to be friends with them?


Yes they make me happy but they dont like me


i mean if they make you happy hang out with them


do u hang out with ur friends do u feel lonely?


well uh i dont have any so thats probably why


idk why i asked why i feel lonely sorry i didnt know what else to say so i said that


don't apologize, ur just venting and thats fine


maybe go out


find some friends


yeah i want to but for some reason i dont because i guess im just shy or scared or something i dont know


its alright to be shy


im shy asf kinda hard for me to find friends


but it takes time


just gotta have a little courage to just go up to someone and have a small talk


who knows maybe u guys will have a lot in common


yeah i guess but people at school laugh at me and arent very nice


and i know that there are other nice people


but


because of them i feel like everyone will laugh at me or something idk if that makes sense


i mean everyone is different, just try to find at least 1 friend to hang out with then it will be easier to find more


most of my freshmen year i had no friends until the end where i started talking to one my classmate and now im a junior and we have like a huge friend group at school


it just takes time


yeah i will try


now that i think about it, that really helps actually so thank you


Joshh np josh3


I've been thinking about mine and my best friends friendship and like it's so one sided I send her all the full face snaps I send her all the goofy ones I make the jokes I help her with school work and shit I help her with her problems I let her ss all my stupid snaps but she she sends me eye snaps she sent me like 5 full face snaps she doesn't send me goofy snaps I have no ss of her she hasn't told me anything that has turned into an inside joke like stuff I've done and told her but really long story short is how tf do I tell her this without hurting or feelings rn I'm just distancing myself ever so slightly every few days but she started to catch on and told me am I all right and that I seemed to have changed so like what do I do


HenryTheHoover maybe just have like a calming talk about how u feel, just say that it feels like you don't want to be friends with me idk if this is what u mean this is just an example or just how say how u feel


ik its hard to say something without hurting the other persons feelings but its better to tell the truth then lie and make it worse


yeah that's why I don't want to do it I just kinda like leave her on delivered for long periods of time and chat on discord to take my mind off it while I think of something to say


i mean i say thats worse then not telling her


Say nice walls or eye


Trust me


Happened to me last night


maybe but the main reason I don't want to say anything is bc ik we'll still have each other on snapchat and it'd just be awkward every time we snap


and the only reason I started thinking about this is bc she lost the 2 month heart


do u like ever call her?


Well I was otg with someone and I decided to stop because i honestly saw it more as a friendship and she is still the top of my bsf list


Being awkward will just be a speedbump to a friendship or whatever you are going for


well we hp regularly which is basically the same thing but we don't as much now bc of school and stuff


Just send nudes to a friend


The way he was asking what it looked like sounded like he was gonna expose me


Yo dont


Yo why


Because he asked a question of what my titties looked like;;


but on the bright side I recently got talking to a friend I haven't talked with in over a year and a half


so it kinda evens out for me


He even told me to show him what my titties look like


HunnyPuppy does the dude have brown or black hair and a perm or bleached hair


HenryTheHoover he has black hair brown eyes tan skin


is the black hair curly on the top but not natural curls


oh then before lockdown was it like curly


idk I'm just asking bc in my opinion any lad that has brown or black hair that's a perm or bleached blonde hair on the top and dark hair on the bottom are instant signs of a fuckboy but it is what it is


I told him that hes making me uncomfyb


He said you don't trust me


I told him that the convo was making me uncomfortable and he said he was so sorry


He's giving me space so I cam send him my naked booty pic;;


I feel so insecure and so ashamed of myself


dont do it then


problem solved


But I don't wanan seem rude


its not rude to not send nudes


I remember the last time I was forced to send nudes


ur talkin to the wrong people


Thanks


and if he says that's fine or like sorry for asking or something like that then try link with him bc he's the one


bc that's a nice guy


but as the song says nice guys always finish last shoulda known that


thats some bad advice


not really


bc if they lash out bc you didn't send nudes they obviously were just horny and weren't interested in ya but if they respect your decision it means there's a better chance of them being nice and understanding


Tw/ Sh, self harm


WOO WOO YEA YEA 2 WEEKS CLEAN i think its 2 weeks at least AND THEYRE FULLY HEALED NOW SO NO ONE CAN SEE THEM WOO WOO YEA YEA


This is more of a positive vent but i didn't know where else to put it


YAY IM SO PROUD OF YOU MAN


KEEP IT UP BRO


THATS GOOD YA PROUD OF U


THANKS GUYS SJDJDND


GOOD JOB!


WOO THATS GREAT IM VERY PROUD


THANKS GUYS!


so um im probably fine ig been overthibking a lot and ik suicide is never the option but like its been on my mind lately but i really dont want to die, i want to live a happy life and im trying to but idk im happy for while but get back down which ik its not impossible to get back up and work harder its just everytime i fall it becomes worse and that feeling is getting closer and closer and idk where the edge is but its close and i just been in a lot of pain and i try to hide it or find a way to release it, its not hard to forget about it but ik its not the best option since it will be worse for me but its like i always just forget about it but when it comes back it bites hard and idk if im making since or not but all im saying is that im struggling to stay alive but i am trying my best


I know how you feel NoPoint


I've been there too


At the edge of a breaking point


I remember fall of the edge


It wasn't that pretty yet I want it to happen


I hated my life


I promise things will get better


Idk of praying helps because it doesnt work on me


And everytime someone prays for me it actually doesn't work


But I'll just hope you just don't fall off the edge of the breaking point


I know things will get better for you I know it will happen


Because I know my life is getting shitty


And I know that your day will come and it will save you


NoPoint It is good that you know it isnt the answer but it will always get better but it will take time, Yes it will be rough but the reward for pushing through is amazing, and having it rough for a while is better than having it dead forever


by who


I know Im supposed to be used to having like racist slurs yelled at me or gestured at me bc its been happening my whole life. My friends say I should be used to it by now and yeah maybe I guess, but it still doesnt hurt any less when peoples parents see me and immediately tell them they cant be friends with me bc of the way I look


even when people say they are used to it ik it still bothers them or hurts them because that means they are used to the pain and the pain will always be there


Okay you are NOT required to send him pictures.


You have no obligation to him


I don't want to send him any pics anymore


If he made you uncomfortable then you need to tell him


Even if he doesnt ask for any more, you need to tell him now


I told him that he made me uncomfortable


He said you sign trust me


It is your body and your life and he needs to respect that


This is honestly really creepy behaviour from him in my opinion


Yeah


Thats 1. Illegal 2. A violation of privacy and rights and 3. A dick move


He didnt even completely stop when you told him to


Hes from spain and I'm here in america


If he doesnt you need to drop him


You should make sure that he doesnt have the pics saved and then cut him out of your life


Friends dont do that


If he has the pics saved your face wasnt in them correct?


My face was never in it


Ok your good then


I never show my face in nudes


Good


In no way shape or form can be prove it was yours


Even if he has ss of you sending it it could be some picture you pulled off of the dark web


It doesnt matter why, he pressured you from start to finish


He didnt respect you


And he better have a damn good explanation


Yeah


An apology doesnt change that


He said that he loves me so much


If he continues it drop him. You dont deserve that and everyone id beautiful in their own way


If he loves you he wont cross boundaries he put down


Okay


Love is something that you earn not just get


And if he doesnt earn it by respecting you completely


Frick him man


media


someone asked u that?


wait what


im confused


confused heather noises


Go to media


He deadass still asking for the nudeb


He deadass asked if me sending a pic with a bra on was the problem or was it the butt


I have to tell him that both of those made me uncomfortable


He even deadass said he can't control it


So I told him that if he can't control it than I'm gonna block him


He said sorry and will try to control it


i saw block rn


say


Okay


But I'm trying to get him to sleep early since its 9pm for him


And he kept saying that I'm trying to get rid of him


I don't wanna talk to him anymore


block him. Dont even give him an explanation just do it.


I told him that I needed to go


Bro just block


Youve told him it made you uncomfortable a lot and he apologized and then kept doing it. He wont learn and he obviously doesnt care about how he's making you feel, he's toxic and you dont need someone like that


Yeah I told him that I needed to go get ready for a friend pool party


And if he keeps bringing it up again I'm gonna block him


You shouldnt even have to give him an excuse, if someone makes you uncomfortable just leave the situation next time


Or even just say I dont want to talk to you right now'


He wont learn if you keep saying youll forgive him and not being straight forwards


Im sorry he's making you uncomfortable


I just don't want to be rude and block him out of nowhere


Its not rude.


You dont owe him your company


He was disrespectful and creepy


Yeah


It is not rude at all to block someone like that


Okay


Thanks rosie


Anytime, always put yourself first3


Okay thank you 3


So basically a couple of weeks ago i talked abt not being able to stop day dreaming and that it interupts my daily life, so i found out there was a test a doctor made online to see if u have it and it says that theres an extremely high chance i do and idk what to do..


I say never put your full trust in a test online, even if a doctor made it, he had to get a programmer to program it for them most likely, or they have put their trust in an AI to do some calculation to give you result, I would take this result to your GP and get it proof checked and maybe you can talk through with them what it is you think you have and your concerns, for the time being though, stay calm, don't jump to the conclusion just yet:


Yea but the thing is i dont wanna go to a doctor tbh i feel like it would be weord to say to my parents oh i think i have maladaptive daydreaming can we go to the doctors it just dont feel right so idk what to so


I understand your embarrassment, I don't ask my parents most of the time because they would more than likely tell me I'm fine and there's nothing wrong with me. Be stubborn though, tell them that it never hurts to go to the doctor for a check up, especially when you haven't been for a while


Im going to the hospital next Wednesday


KILL ME PLS I DONT WANNA GO


d a m n


CAUSE THEN I HAVE TO HAVE A BLOOD TEST


but they do put shrek on for me whenever i cone


Come


w h a


Cause i go to a children's hospital cause im so ill


So they put shrek bee movie moana on ligit 24/7


n i c e


Today hasnt been a good. So around lunch, I found out that my grandad, is losing his vision and may go blind. My other grandpa had a stroke today. Which makes me quite sad and many emotions. I was playing bee wars and my stepbrother I told him, and started to be a jerk. So I left.


o im sorry james, i hope both ur grandas get better and its ok to be sad maybe just be with urself or hang out with someone u really trust and comfortable with


Oh im so sorry bro


Yeah.


I really hope both af your grandparents end up well


Yeah. Sorry, if I ever become quite angry


There the only two people I have left as a grandpa


its alright james just try to relax urself and take care of urself


Yeah


Its alright man


Just try and take care of urself and things will work out


Yeah. I will try at least. And hopefully things will be better


am i annoying?


i feel annoying


nopers


maybe i should stop going on abt anime characters


that must be annoying


i forget thats weird


im such a weird person


its not annoying


u are just expressing what u like


thats perfectly normal


everyone is weird in their own way and its ok to show it


you are simply filled with a love for something that you like to talk about, it's not annoying /


i just wish that everything was okay so i didnt find comfort in fictional characters


and then get so worked up over them


i find so much comfort in them it hurts when someone bashes them


or bashes me for simping for them


of finding comfort in them


i need to stop investing so much


it did stop mental breakdowns did this escapism with anime


it isn't u that is annoying it is the person that is annoying u and making u uncomfortable


maybe i should just deal with them instead


u are just doing what makes u comfort


sure but i feel everyone is sick of hearing it now


i randomnly pop in main to talk abt them


i mostly get ignored but


this is a server, a group chat there is always gonna be different convos and u popping in ur gonna find other people that would love to talk about it too


u are just making another topic


and i rather u talk about what u like then u just staying quiet


does jack actually dislike me or is it a joke cause i cant tell anymore...


ya i felt the same with another person ik


i guess i just get into these moments of self doubt and shiz and i already felt a little ignored so i guess it just didnt click as a joke at the time


thank you sim... you are always so nice to me even when i dont deserve it. youve always helped me and im very grateful


u deserve the world tay don't put urself down


i havent cried like this in ages. i guess it was pent up all day i already felt like crying but couldnt earlier


we all have our days its ok to cry but all im saying is that u are amazing and i will always be here for you and care for you and nothing will change that


thank you so so much i just need to hear that once in awhile... and you are amazing too and ill always be here for you as well


i love my irl friends but they arent very affectionate


so i dont hear that very often


hehe if u ever just want love i will always give it


thank you uhurhug you are so sweet 3


Idk why I even talk here anymore


Id get more out of talking to a brick wall


i responded to ur comment, i was just too into the other convo, ik it seems like its hard to talk to people its just cause there are different convos and sometimes people only pay attention to their convo so kinda hard but i get that, i saw a lot of things and no one notices it, i have like the most messages in the server thats cause i talk about and sometimes my messages get ignored and im ok with that, its just that sometimes people are into a different convo


thats kinda the problem with servesr is that convos are gonna be hard when one has already started


The server is so big a chat 2 would be nice


i mean we did have a chat 2 but it wasn't used


so we deleted it


Id use it


I get ignored all the time in main chat


So then I just leave and not talk for a bit


i mean i try to respond to everyone


sometimes im too into another convo i don't pay attention to whats going on only whats happening with the convo that im into


but a chat 2 isn;t really necessary cause we have like only minimum 3 people talking and its only when it gets active and everyone is talking it is a little harder


yeah no im just gonna stop spouting about stuff i am interested in main i cant handle it when im already having a bad night


what happen?


who told u


i get it was probably a joke but when we were talking abt nate looking like one of them i started listing of their names and baka just had to go tell me to indirectly shut up because we dont care or something cant remember... wasnt really what i needed to hear after just getting upset abt feeling annoying when i start spouting abt my interests


Yeah thats mean


i wish i could curl into a ball sometimes and just fade away. but yeah i really dont wanna talk abt them anymore


o oki i saw what he said


it wasnt even off topic this time


ok look tay


I understand that


i get what u mean


and i understand


but you can talk all u want in this server


no one can stop u


its kinda like the same feeling when I get ignored


no one should


baka said it as a joke thats what he does


baka is never serious and doesn't mean to hurt anyones feelings


he is genuinely a nice dude but i get how u feel


its alright tay


i used to be the same


also Taylax I notice whenever you talk about your interests a lot of people like to talk about it with you which is cool


greg used to do the same to me


and i felt like when he talks i shouldn't talk


i came to that point where i just felt like i made it worse


since when was social interaction this hard...


but seriously if anyone tells u to be quiet just keep going, idc who they are u are amazing for you and this is a server where everyone wants u to talk


Tell me about it


Also you arent pathetic for taking a joke seriously when you cant see it was meant as a joke its literally text on a screen. Theres no context for it being a joke


why cant this be straight forward its so frustrating


yeah I know how that feels


considering what I have


oh yeah i feel a little insensitive now for ranting abt that when im neurotypical apologies aha


No its ok


I notice a lot of people like talking about your interests when you come to chat and thats pretty cool. Theres a lot of people here for you that enjoy talking to you and about the stuff you like


tay everyone loves you


Gingie Yeah its just catching the right people when i talk abt them in main


if i get the right ones i get replies. i dont its like talking to a wall


Yeah unfortunately thats how it is for me most of the time


or they just tell you to shut up. normally its a joke and when its not i can take it but today just wasnt that day


ya remember this is a big gc so there gonna be people with the same interest and some who don't


i mean if i do talk when chat is dead for a bit it ends up a whole paragraph of me talking and when someone finally appears and they say something on a different topic and everyone starts talking again you kinda just feel kind of rejected/dejected i guess


Yeah I know that


All to well


Happens to me in real conversations


most people want to talk about their topics so there is gonna be different topics i have seen that


Yeah theres also a lot of topics I dont know about like tiktok and anime and inside jokes or personal stuff


yeah same with my irl friends ill be going on abt my interests. one of them my best friend listens so i can rant abt my hyperfixtations and obsessions then there is the other who just wont listen and just shuts me down when i talk abt them cause they dont care abt that topic


something i struggled with for a while was recognizing it is completely normal to feel sad when being shut down while your talking about something you like. i use to think that i was totally taking it too seriously and that it shouldn't bother me, but it did bother me and that's normal. nobody likes to be excited about something and have someone either not care or immediately try and get you to stop talking about it. whether it's you discussing a comfort character, someone you simp for, a recent series you like, you are never in the wrong for feeling bad when you're not allowed to be open about your happiness towards that subject.


thats why im happy to talk to anyone, ik its hard to talk about what ur comfortable with but like im always willing to talk about anything


even tho i might not have knowledge of it i am willing to talk about it


i used to get hyperfixations pretty frequently and they'd last a while to help me cope with certain problems i had. even now though, when i'm excited about a book, i tend to apologize for rambling about it because i had friends who didn't wanna hear about it. you're not overreacting or too sensitive if these things upset you, they upset me too. they upset everyone i promise you.


Whenever I see someone ignored I try to talk to them because I know how it feels in this server


even if someone acts nonchalant about it, nobody likes being forced to keep their interests a secret.


i really like listening to people ramble abt books or shows cause its fun to listen to someone talk abt something they really like. like i enjoy vcs with kali cause even if i dont know the book she may be reading she is so excited and passionate abt it i like listening abt the story lmao


Yeah I find that fun too


when my friend rants abt a show and how bad it is its fun to listen to cause she makes loads of jokes abt it as well


tayla, you are more than welcome to reach out to me on whatever it is you are interested in, even if i lack knowledge about it. you being so open about how you feel for certain characters and series, makes me really happy and i love to hear about it. hell, i dmed you like 50 images of sakusa and you didn't complain once.


and thanks tayla, i really appreciate that 3


kali im happy when u get excited about a book because u are happy about it and are comfortable and want to talk about it and i always listen and respond to as much as i can ofc and i always care about what u are talking about.


Tay same with you, i always like talking to you so i enjoy our talk about anime or boys or anything cause i enjoy talking to you


idk if that came out right


jhusudbdfj you going into rocky waters there cause if you get me on a subject im really interested in or a character youll end up with a mile long essay of why bakugo is a misunderstood character and why he is great


and im totally fine with that


again i enjoy talking to u


so


u can always talk to me about anything


you guys are great i love you so much. Gingie you too gingie 3


No u


sojsduihdufd


you guys are really good at cheering me up...


i enjoy talking to you too


Taylax wow me no


and liam, the one time i vced with you i thought you were really cool and nice. i'm sorry you sometimes feel invisible in the server, if you ever wanna talk, you can send me a message. i'm really bad at responding but am always down to call


she is really bad


like


and i love you too tay


terriable


james?


I have struggled with was comparing, or even feeling judge for wearing a piece of clothing. Back in elementary I thought I was cool, got terrible grades and even judge for my grades. Middle school year I did great. So far Im not doing too well. Im getting bad grades and think that if I wear this clothing it makes me cool, and I dont want to be cool. So Im not gonna wear it, pretty much. Which I have been saying a piece of clothing shouldnt make me cool, or shoes”. Which I struggle with that. I want to be smart, but really I dont know. I was doing great, then I fell.


you can wear what u want to wear something u are comfortable with


and u are already cool james


i think u are cool


and try to focus on ur grades


and its ok to fall sometimes


just get back up and try another time


Yeah, I just think that a piece of clothing makes me cool”. I am, but idk. Just falling. Ever since this summer, I been doing bad. Or 2020.


its alright to fall james


it happens to the best of us


True


just try to do better


then if u fall again just get back up and try again


trial and error


I can try. This online it making me wonky


its alright


trying is all we can do


I wrote something, that I been reading to try to make me feel better


Life isnt all about being perfect, it isnt about how much friends you have and or if your popular or not. You shouldnt choose you life or compare your life to someone elses. Everyday, I compared my life to these two people. How they are intelligent and really show who they are as a person. I wanted to be like them, I just wanted to be them. But turns out, I dont show my true self, I hide behind a happy person. Im smart, just not enough has them. And I have learned that they have theres faults and falls, like everybody else. You shouldnt compare your life to someone elses, to feel special or something deep inside. Just to let you know that your life is the way you have intended it too be. And your depressed just letting you know, nobody is perfect. And your family and friends care about you. Trust me.


HUH


yaaa my bad


i didnt know when it would be a good time to put that but yaaa


ya man thx im trying having a hard time in life rn and i dont think i will be getting back up, i have fallen and havent gotten up so im trying my best to have that feeling of getting up but idk its fading and im just having some trouble


physically im not doing the best


mentally my brain is dying


and my life isnt really going anywhere


im not really trying cause i gave up awhile ago and i just do my best to stay happy but having a hard time with that too


i appreciate everyone in my life


i dont hate anyone or dislike anyone


NoPoint Please just dont kill yourself. Its okay to be yourself, trust me. Man, I really do enjoy talking to you. And you really make my day go up.


i love everyone in this sever and im proud to call myself a friend to everyone here but man im just not doing great


Do you want to talk about it? That may help


I feel like you thinking that way abt death doesnt mean ur getting closer to it. I mean idk if you feel like you're just getting closer to your breaking point or something but yea i hope you know its not the only choice


Things just have to get worse to get better sometimes


Yeah, remember in life you have your negatives and positive


And mistakes are alright


It might help to find something to occupy ur time with


Like picking up a new hobby


So ur not just stuck thinking


Possibly try reading or painting


And im glad that you're at least trying to be happy


Trying takes a lot of effort sometimes


i have already been to my lowest point of life where i had no one and didnt do anything but i came back up very little but its not going too well, life is beautiful and i do hope to see it all the way through but just if i had the chance to die i would just i dont see a future for me if im being honest, im just a waste of potential, nothing really gets me out of bed really only people do, like i want to be there for people i want people to be happy and i want my family to be happy but i just cause problems a lot of times and kinda ruin a lot of things, i just stay alone and that idk i dont wanna die i really dont but its just like im running out of options


Then let people be your motivation to keep living


Your going to make me cry. But like isnt all about being Perfect, just know there hope. Things may brighten up, without you I would be in vent right not knowing what to do. And its okay not to be happy most of the time. Possibly spend more time with your family or go get yourself a girlfriend. Man, I really care about you. I almost lost my brother, mother, sister, and even my stepbrother to suicide. And you are really hope for me.


If people are truly all that keeps you going at this time in your life, then let them motivate you to stay in this world longer


Yeah


You really mean a lot to so many people simar


Yeah, and you make my day brighten up.


i just want to be there for people and i feel like i need to be happy so others can be happy, i always thought i had potential still think i do but its a waste in me when cant do snything with it, my family is awesome and im glad im a part of it but i feel like me being here makes everything worse, honestly i want a gf too but i really dont want my problems on someone else i just feel like i need to fix myself before letting someone else love me. like i really do want to be with everyone and literally see their smile on their face and have fun but i just kinda drag things and ruin things and i dont wanna ruin peoples modd


mood


NoPoint What do you mean when you say your making everyone experience terrible here?! Trust me man, you cant ever be too much. And your still changing into adult.


Never


i overthink a lot on how people feel and even tho idrc what people say about me like i ignore negative comments about me i care about how they feel like if i made them feel better or worse its just something i do a lot which is why i get really scared when i talk to someone if they are sad cause if i say 1 thing wrong it could hurt them more


and i just dont wanna hurt people anymore


NoPoint Your not hurting anyone! And if you do its a mistake, and you can apologize. Eventually they will accept. Patient. But man, you cant ever make someone hurt. Also thats life; interactions, enemies, and even mistakes. Mistakes are made for you to learn.


i even made my parents fight today


It probably want your fault entirely


Issues with how out parents treat eachother really cant be controlled by us


You really shouldnt take the blame when there mustve been other small factors just leading to that moment


idk i usually take the blame cause its a heavy weight to hold and it does stress people but i dont really stress about anything cause i do nothing


I mean just as long as you're trying to get better then thats what matters rn. Bec you do have potential for a good future, as everyone does. You made it past your last big downfall in life so you can make it past this one ok?


NoPoint Well. I hope you become better. Goodnight


Sleep well!


The pool had 3ft 4ft and 5ft


I almost drowned


At 5ft even tho I'm 5'3


I had to be on the boys back because they were big and taller than me


Wish I took pictures doe


It is very weird


Well not really


This sounds cringe to me but


Why is it I want a relationship when I only like one person and they probably dont even like me


Well, did you ask one out?


Yes


Last year


Nice


Yeah, I never have been in a relationship


2 weeks, didnt tell me why she broke up


Well dont rush into your first relationship


True


Dont even have my first kiss


Same


how does one bring up to their parents they want to get tested for ADHD and go to therapy cause i have so many symptoms i think i need to see if i do at this point


along with alot of the more common symptoms other symptoms are like being sensitive to rejection and bad volume control...


just go to ur parents and say u wanna talk to them about something and say what u want and reasons why


sounds simple enough in theory


everything is simple in theory


its always harder to do it


interacting with parents is the bane of my existence


well ik u are awesome and maybe it will take some time but u will be talk to them about this at some point


just take times


u just gotta go for it sometimes


wait too long and u moght not get the opportunity


and i am currently jumping up and down on a bus now that im writing thos i realized how wrong this sounds


yeah i hope so cause i wonder if i can get medication to help me stay focused and try quell my scatter brainess and lack luster effort to commit to long brain effort tasks


and i am currently jumping up and down on a bounce now that im writing thos i realized how wrong this sounds


NoPoint jksadhyudsfgsujk


not me putting something doing and forgetting it was there 10 seconds later then trying to do one task then doing another before finishing and changing tasks quickly


ya tay i see nothing wrong with u u are perfect the way u are but if u fee like something is bothering u and medication will help then u should try to get it right away


you just go through the symptoms realise how many you have and then the things that come along with adhd and suddenly alot of it makes sense


tay u never know until u test so try to ask right away when u are comfortable and have enough courage for it at the moment because i know u are strong and wonderful and literally can do anything u want with just a little bit of confidence boost


thank you for the advice sim i appreciate it


jsjsduhdsj


Idk if I should feel this way but


I feel so lonely even when I hang out with friends I still feel lonely inside


Like I'm so lonely I can't feel like someone is here with me


its okay to feel that way


And its honestly gonna make me cry


we all feel lonely but I promise youll find someone


like a really nice friend


I know I might just be some stranger on discord


but I promise one day u wont feel lonely


I keep finding someone who'll make not feel lonely


Keep your head up


Bit it keeps failing


I can't keep my head up I'm giving up so fucken quickly


I felt so alone since last year


why, if you dont mind me asking


Because I've been with alot of people who said that they won't leave me but honestly they did


And I hate them for that


I'm feeling so lonely


those people werent made for you


youll find better people


It felt like I've been living in the dark which I'm scared of


I'm scared of the dark it bring back trama


Ive made it to the dark place many times but I seem to make it out


I can't make out my fears


Their called feara for a reason


fears are scary and all.


but I believe you can overcome them


if you try hard enough


I can't overcome anything


I'm scared of falling in love because if I do they'll leave me


Im really bad at relationships


Me too b


Because I can't seem to make them last longer


the last person I dated we were in a 1year relationship


and I just gave up on luv


No matter how much o try to make things work out I just fail to keep them longer


love


I've been in 6 relationships


None of them worked out how I wanted to be


Ive been in to many and Ive been either lied to or betrayed


same.


but you cant think that way


not while Im around!


I already did


please just keep your head up


believe in yourself


take breaks when needed


No I can't


I don't know who to believe in


people are scary, but.


you cant let them take advantage


my fear is being forgotten, and its happen to many times by people I love. But I found something that makes me feel better example: Music. It calms me down,its something i use to cope


do u have something you use to cope/calm yourself down?


Yes indie music calms me down and music that describes me


why dont you listen to that for a bit and think?


Okay


take care


I really stuffed up my essay


And my parents are gonna be really mad


its just one essay


dont be sad or scared bout ur parents


if theyre strict explain it to them


if ure having a hard time go ask them


aaa


and plus school is just a learning process we all have our own paces slow or fast we'll get to the finish line anyways


Gee


Yes but my parents get mad really easily


A few weeks ago I had math test and I thought I wouldve failed but turns out I passed and my parents were still mad


isnt passing like good?


id like to speak to ur parents


Exactly


Why cant I be older sooner


age


yo


what if transage was a thing


a 9 year old could identify as 19


Ikr


and then it wouldnt be pedaphilia


das crazy


I would identify as a 16 year old so I could drive


Im 13


im not going to


nice


Yungun


i would identify as 15 bc 2005


bc the class of 24


missed a genetic or something


ong


Hmm


Wait..


Mantis HELLO STEP FATHER KIND I YHINK?


Wait a minute


Cozy


Whos ur dad


Bee


Are you married to YourLocalShrub


Mantis


Yeah


Yes


Yeh hello father


Kind of


I was forced into her family


Ummmh is


Ur okay


Im fine


How did u get forced in


Long story1


Ok well hi


Child


Hope u enjoy ur stay before we ship u off to college


Nah man ship me off to the middle of the sea. Let me drown itll be fun


Ah u have my humor


Hmmm


Lets go


Whos ur dad tho


Shes my step daughter so like


Ohhh so shes my second step daughter


Mhm


I didnt want her but it came with a marriage


Oof


Oopsies


Well she stays


Im pretty sure shes gonna rage quit and divorce my actual dad one of these days cause of me


Probably


Im actually wanted by something thats not my cat but then again they just want food


Do u know ur sister


Uh


No


damn i really just walked into a family reunion


Yeh


Welcome


I had a panic attack for a moment


I whent to go use the restroom


And when I came back I see my screen all green


And I literally thought they all heard me use the restroom


But when I looked at the screen turns out I was on mute


that would have been awkward asf


Are you okay?..


Bee yeah I'm okay


Thats good


im going to study rn i hope i dont lose focus


someone believe in me:0


im one of the many I believe in you


thank you


My mom told me she's gonna go work an hour more at 3:20pm


And I'm hungry


I don't like the taste of my cooking


I want my moms cooking in my mouth bec I only like my mom cooking


I'm okay with dad's cooking it's really tasty but it's better if my mom made it


My aunts cooking I'm not used to it


She burnts the bread


She makes it charcoal


And I dont want to eat it bec it's all burnt


I hate burnt food, its nasty


But I'm gonna go stave untill my mom comes home


cant you go to the store


I don't have money tho


It hurts


My leg ache


We walked all day today


But I got a cool aboriginal painting on my hand to show respect to them


It was really cool


But its gone now


it hurts


Its a constant pain


hurts more if its the heart


but i wanna help


Its like a pulse running through my foot up my leg


does it feel like ants going to ur leg?


can u still walk?


Yes


Its just leg aches like you get when its cold


get a warm towel


Or I think when you dont have enough water


I cant


Im supposed to be asleep


do u have anyone there


doesnt matter if ure supposed to be asleep


its better to inform someone


go text or shout to the person in ur place


The pain takes a while to go away


Once I am asleep I will be fine


yes try to think


or watch a yt video


if not im here to talk


i always have this irritating pain in my eyes


it lasted for abt 2 days


cuz my mom saw a document where if u dont blink too much ur eyes will start to hurt


i thought it was just hair in my eye or sumn


I just wrapped my feet up


mk


which do u prefer for the pain to go away? cold or hot


That eye thing sounds annoying


Wym?


Hot helps, I had a shower an hour ago or sm and it was nice because it was warm


But its cold again


Gee good good


Gee hmmm


And now I feel sick


put a blanket?


u got a temperature checker?


look did u ask anyone for help in ur house?


or place ur staying at?


I already hav two blankets


No


And no


Gee yes when i blink it hurts


so i had to keep my eye open alot of times


its like being blind


I have Been sick past few days


so i just slept the whole day


Gee where do u think u got it from


Btw if my spelling is bad my phone is bing really bad


its fine


idrc


Idk


omg


let me read this


im scared of people


very much


i hate humans


quarantine changed everything


i just feel kinda depressed all the time . I've been at home a lot because going anywhere is expensive rn and then there's COVID restrictions and all, it's uncomfortable. I also live in a very suburbian neighbourhood with old people but i need to take the bus to go to the nearest shops and stuff so it's tiring.


i do think the same when u said idk what purpose is of life


But when it comes to friends, I feel like they'll leave me asap, I'm just a boring individual that often displays signs of antisocial behaviour, yet I try so hard.


i hate how its repetative:/


DynamiteQuan:


idk how i can help buddy


i wanna help


but i cant find the words to say it


Honestly idk though, i just wish i had friends I can feel happy around. I've mostly been sad all summer. I made the mistake of ghosting my irl friends on insta by not replying back after 6 months and idk.. it's gonna be awkward if i text them back since we aren't really that close of friends so it'll seem forced


i was only starting to make friends properly last year and then right before COVID


but that messed up everything


And idk if i should even do art anymore if i get nobody liking it, and i see others posting art that looks a little more meh and garnering likes


i spent all night last night doing art, then i took pictures, posted it on twitter right after. I was asleep, excited hoping I could finally get noticed


I got up and only got 1 like


I know i shouldn't care like that since it seems totally childish, but I crave attention and I haven't got any good ones in a very long long time


totally feel depressed and maybe harming myself is the only way out


No


Note y pone is broken


Spelling will be bad


Do not harm yourself


I am possibly like you


I want attention


In school I get attention


Outside I get none


Dont you love watching a movie


Then you wish you were someone from the movie or in it


Because that just happened


To m


people around me use the f slur so much that i wonder if they actually hate me


everyone


I'm feeling extremely lonely today


Idk what to do


And I got a blue alert that will happen at 11:35pm


Idk what blue alert is but okay


hm wanna talk if you are lonenly?


Yeah


I just feel so lonely idk when


Maybe when my ex left me twice or when I keep losing someone I loved the most


I think one of those moments is what made me feel so lonely


I hate feeling lonely


Makes me feel so worthless


I honestly hate myself more I keep feeling more loneli


hm is there a speficifik reason you dislike beig lonely actually


I feel so sad rn Im getting bullied by baka Jokes


No how


How


Hoe


im one of the many yes it makes me feel threatened whenever I'm alone


threatend like fear?


Yes


Everytime I'm alone it feels like someone is hugging me and kisses my neck for comfort when I'm alone