Common obstacles to reaching a negotiated or mediated divorce settlement?
<p>I am trying to understand, in general, the common obstacles to reaching a negotiated or mediated divorce settlement and ways to avoid or deal with those obstacles.  Any thoughts or resources to suggest?</p>

<h3>Obstacle #1: Emotion</h3>

<p>Family law issues are wrought with emotion. This clouds judgment and reasoning capacity. This is the biggest obstacle in my experience.</p>

<h3>Obstacle #2: Punishment motive</h3>

<p>Related to obstacle #1, this is a very specific desire of one party to "punish" the other for perceived past wrongs.</p>

<h3>Obstacle #3: Lack of prioritizing children's interests</h3>

<p>Many issues can be resolved if both parties take an objective look at what's in the best interest of the children and act accordingly. Unfortunately, this doesn't happen all too often.</p>

<h3>Recommendations</h3>

<p>My recommendations to you are as follows.</p>

<ol>
<li>Both parties should hire an attorney.</li>
<li>The parties should jointly hire a <strong><em>professional mediator</em></strong> who has a long track record and specializes in mediating family law matters.</li>
<li>Leave the emotions out of it and look out for the best interests of the children first.</li>
<li>Be wary of attorneys who seek to push emotional hot button issues.</li>
</ol>

divorce mediation